Parenting Across Cultures: Childrearing, Motherhood and Fatherhood in Non-Western Cultures (Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science, 12) 3031153588, 9783031153587

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Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science

Helaine Selin   Editor

Parenting Across Cultures

Childrearing, Motherhood and Fatherhood in Non-Western Cultures Second Edition

Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science Volume 12

Series Editor Helaine Selin, Faculty Associate and Science Librarian at Hampshire College (retired), Massachusetts, MA, USA

The series Science Across Cultures: History and Practice, formerly called Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science, seeks to describe and document the scientific knowledge and beliefs of the world’s cultures. Comparative and revealing, the series challenges our preconceived ideas about science and culture. It is of special interest not only to those in the field of comparative history and the history of science, but also to social scientists and humanists whose interest areas are touched by the volumes in this series. This includes people working in areas such as textiles, ceramics, architecture, farming, parenting and psychology. Contributions are welcome from those working on topics involving the history and practice of science and culture around the world.

Helaine Selin Editor

Parenting Across Cultures Childrearing, Motherhood and Fatherhood in Non-Western Cultures Second Edition

Editor Helaine Selin Faculty Associate and Science Librarian at Hampshire College (retired) Massachusetts, MA, USA

ISSN 1568-2145 ISSN 2215-1761 (electronic) Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science ISBN 978-3-031-15358-7 ISBN 978-3-031-15359-4 (eBook) https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4 1st edition: © Springer Science+Business Media Dordrecht 2014 2nd edition: © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022, corrected publication 2022 This work is subject to copyright. All rights are solely and exclusively licensed by the Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter developed. The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use. The publisher, the authors, and the editors are safe to assume that the advice and information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication. Neither the publisher nor the authors or the editors give a warranty, expressed or implied, with respect to the material contained herein or for any errors or omissions that may have been made. The publisher remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations. This Springer imprint is published by the registered company Springer Nature Switzerland AG The registered company address is: Gewerbestrasse 11, 6330 Cham, Switzerland

Introduction

Here is some of what I said in my introduction to the First Edition on Parenting Across Cultures “And we find, on our journey around the world in this book, that there are many ways of parenting, based on culture, character and hopes for the future generation. In many parts of the world, especially in rural areas, the style of parenting practiced is the same as that practiced by many generations before. If people are to live the same kind of lives, the same kinds of parenting still apply. But, as people move to the cities, as women join the labor force, as so-called modern life and mobile phones infiltrate into people’s belief systems, the method of parenting has to change also. There is less reliance on other family members, especially grandparents, and there is a more limited social network for other activities. Children in many cultures are heavily directed into better schools and classes. I found differences in parenting relating to gender—often girls are ignored, considered a liability, and not educated or even loved. At the same time, it is the mothers who are most involved in raising and caring for children, and the children often are closest to their mothers. Often in the chapters there is reference to Baumrind’s parenting styles, which she introduced in 1967 and revised in 1987 (Baumrind 1967, 1987), to include authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, traditional and rejecting-neglecting parenting. Many authors try to relate these styles to the countries they are writing about. Parenting style is a combination of attitudes toward the child that creates an emotional climate in which parents act. I also found that television and especially mobile phones have made their way into cultures that were previously cut off from the rest of the world. Perhaps this technological change will move people away from traditional ways of parenting. I wonder if the new generation will want to be the kinds of parents their parents were, or if they see a different life for themselves? It will be interesting to redo this book in 20 years and see how many things have changed and become homogenized and globalized.” v

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Introduction

Well, it is less than 10 years since the first edition, and so many things have changed radically. This is one new theme that has emerged. “Mobile phones are everywhere in the world. Given an expected global population of just over eight billion by then, that means that the smartphone penetration rate in 2023 will be at around 85 percent. In other words, more than eight in ten people in the world will be equipped with a smartphone” (OBERLO, 2022). What this means is that people have access to the Internet, access to other ways of being and living, more control over their own marketing, and a different outlook on the world. At the same time, there is technology addiction, from a very early age in some cultures, with parents often unable to control their children’s use of technology. The subject of technology comes up in each chapter, and there are also separate chapters on technology and addiction in this second edition. And of course, the COVID pandemic has occurred, leaving people, especially parents, with increased burdens and responsibilities. As of this writing in April 2022, the CDC (Centers for Disease Control) in the USA estimates that 75% of children have had COVID. The burden of caring for and educating children, while often losing your own job or having to do it remotely at the same time as looking after children, is enormous. The effect of COVID has been especially troubling with poor people, as they have less access to health care and to technology. Every author in this new edition has mentioned the effect of COVID in their country, and there are a few chapters devoted especially to it. Other themes in this new edition include a chapter on transgender, another on technology, and another on transnational parenting. These are quite enormous changes in just a few years. I have found that parenting has become increasingly stressful all around the world, as parents try to balance their own lives and aspirations and those they hold for their children, in an increasingly difficult world.

References Baumrind, D. (1967). Child care practices anteceding three patterns of preschool behavior. Genetic Psychology Monographs, 75(1), 43–88. Baumrind, D. (1987). A developmental perspective on adolescent risk taking in contemporary America. New Directions for Child Development, 37, 93–125. OBERLO. (2022). https://www.oberlo.com/statistics/how-many-people-have-smartphones

Contents

The Kenyan Parent in Changing Times: An Update . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1 Pamela Akinyi Wadende, Jon Lasser, and Kathleen Fite Parenting in a Rainbow Nation: A South African Perspective on Parenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 Nicolette V. Roman and Fatiema Benjamin Parenting and Parent-Child Relationships in Chile . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33 Kevin Ray Bush, Ally Laila Murphy, and Gary W. Peterson Understanding Childhood Shyness in the Changing Chinese Context: The Parent Perspective . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51 Yiyuan Xu and Da Eun Suh The Ethical Space of Indigenous Parenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65 Peter Choate and Gabrielle E. Lindstrom The Evolving Challenges of Modern-Day Parenthood in Singapore . . . . . . 85 Karen Mui-Teng Quek Advances in the Study of Parenting in Argentina . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .101 María Cristina Richaud, Jael Vargas-Rubilar, and Viviana Lemos Childrearing in Japan . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .119 Ayumi Nagase and Susan D. Holloway Parenting in Israel: Together Hand in Hand: You Are Mine and I Am Yours . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .135 Miri Scharf and Sharona Natan Parenting in Contemporary Hong Kong: Observations Based on Recent Research Findings . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .149 Daniel T. L. Shek, Rachel Sun, Janet T. Y. Leung, and Moon Law

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Vietnamese Parenting in the Digital Age . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .165 Son Duc Nguyen, Huyen Bui Thi Thu, and Phuoc Hoang Anh Sociocultural and Religious Context of Malay Parenting in Malaysia . . . . .175 Ziarat Hossain and Zainal Madon Family Socialization in Brazil . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .193 Isabel Martínez, Pablo Queiroz, Leoncio Camino, Cleonice Camino, and Edie Cruise Parenthood and Childrearing in Mexico: Patterns and Trends . . . . . . . . .215 Hans Oudhof and Erika Robles Conflict and Parenting in Burundi . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .227 Lidewyde H. Berckmoes Parenting in Turkey . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .243 M. Selenga Gürmen and Sude Kılıç Fluid Families and Harshness as Adaptation in Haitian Childcare: An Approach to Improving Life Outcomes for Haitian Children . . . . . . . .259 Kate Schuenke-Lucien, Abigail Mills, and Bryanna Beamer Between Tradition and Modernity: The Changing Patterns of Parenting in Nigeria . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .273 Osifunke Ekundayo and Muyiwa Adigun Mother-Child Emotional Availability Across Cultures: Findings from Western and Non-Western Countries . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .285 Diane L. Putnick, Marc H. Bornstein, and Joan T. D. Suwalsky Parents’ Aggression Toward Children and Children’s Own Aggression . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .307 Jennifer E. Lansford Grandparenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .321 Barbara H. Settles Parenting and Technology . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .339 Jon Lasser and Jolene Ellis Parents and Parenting in the COVID-19 Pandemic: A Review of the COVID-19 Literature . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .351 Nicolette V. Roman Parent-Child/Adolescent Relationships During the COVID-19 Pandemic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .367 Ally Laila Murphy, Kevin Ray Bush, and Jayne Elise Jurasek

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Parenting, Mental Health and Transgender Youth: Practices and Perspectives in India . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .385 Doyel Ghosh and Prasanta Kumar Roy Parenting Children with Disabilities in East Asian Countries and the U.S. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .401 Misa Kayama and Wendy Haight Parenting and Adolescent Technological Addictions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .417 Cristina Serna and Isabel Martínez Becoming a Father in South Africa: Customary Practices and Negotiating Fatherhood . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .437 Elena Moore and Jill Samukimba Transnational Parenthood . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .453 Esra Demirkol Colosio Correction to: Parenting, Mental Health and Transgender Youth: Practices and Perspectives in India . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . C1

About the Editor

Helaine Selin was a Faculty Associate and Science Librarian at Hampshire College, Amherst, Massachusetts, USA, from which she retired in 2012. She is the editor of the Encyclopaedia of the History of Science, Technology, and Medicine in Non-Western Cultures (3rd ed. Springer 2016) and nine books in Springer’s Science Across Cultures series, on Astronomy, Mathematics, Medicine, Nature, Childbirth, Parenting, Happiness, Death and Aging.

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The Kenyan Parent in Changing Times: An Update Pamela Akinyi Wadende, Jon Lasser, and Kathleen Fite

Introduction Family structures around the world reflect the saying that it “takes a village to raise a child.” Parenting or cultural/developmental instruction and care of children is assumed by the parents as well as the extended family and community; both at home and in institutions that children attend such as school and church. That almost everyone contributes to the development of children among them, underlines the important position the young in any community occupy. Children represent the future of the community. Consequently, if they are prepared well, the community, and by extension the world’s, future is secured. Parental roles and practices continuously evolve to adapt emerging ideas and trends in varying degrees. These roles are modified by the changing social, economic, cultural, and personal needs, ways of life of the community members and, presently, diseases such as HIV and COVID-19. For instance, the effect of communication media such as the radio, television, and the Internet on parenting has been widely researched, giving rise to wide-ranging findings. Citing such studies, Schmidt et al. (2008) and Science Daily (2008) note that, for example, having a television program on in the background disrupts a child’s toy play experience. Time spent watching television programs may also take away from positive parent-child engagement time. As children spend greater amounts of time in front of computers,

P. A. Wadende (*) Kisii University, Kisii, Kenya J. Lasser (*) School Psychology Program, Texas State University, San Marcos, TX, USA e-mail: [email protected] K. Fite College of Education, Texas State University, San Marcos, TX, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_1

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mobile phones, and tablets, parents and caregivers continue to raised concerns about the potential effects of these devices. Emerging research suggests that there may indeed be adverse developmental effects on young children from excessive screen time exposure (Brooks & Lasser, 2018; Madigan et al., 2019).

Country Summary Kenya, with a population estimated at 47.5 million (KNBS, 2019), is one of the three main East African countries, in addition to Uganda and Tanzania. Kenya shares borders with Somalia to her West, Tanzania to her South, Uganda to her East, and Ethiopia and Southern Sudan to her North. As a producer of world-famous tea, flowers, and coffee, Kenya’s economic mainstay is agriculture. Politically, a multiparty grand coalition of political groupings forms the government as a result of the general elections held in 2017. There are 43 ethnic communities in Kenya; the newest being the Makonde community, originally from Mozambique, that was recognized and declared the 43rd ethnic community by a presidential directive in 2016 (Ndubi, 2017). All the communities have distinctive languages and cultural practices. They all have designated areas considered their traditional ancestral lands, including, for example, the areas around Lake Victoria for the Luo and lands in the Rift Valley area of Western Kenya for the Kipsigis. However, due to internal migration, some of these ancestral lands have a mixture of ethnic communities. On formal education matters, the literacy level for men is estimated at over 80% and slightly below that for women. Since 2003, an education policy by the government instituted free elementary school education and another such policy in 2008 introduced cost-sharing (where parents shared the cost with the government) in high school education. These two policies have increased school attendance by learners hitherto unable to get a school education (Wambugu and Mokoena, 2017). An assessment of the impact of this policy by United Nations Education, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) in 2005 noted that attendance in elementary school had shot up from about five million learners in 2003 to about eight million in 2005 (Kenya Ministry of Education, 2005). The family unit in Kenya consists of immediate and extended family members. This is especially the norm in families that reside in the rural and, in most cases, traditional ethnic community lands. In all these communities, when a woman marries, she is expected to move into the man’s home and live with his extended family (Dietler & Herbich, 1989) and often even with his multiple wives. Mothers raise their children by copying their parent’s child raising practices. Younger family members are always expected to participate more actively in the child’s upbringing when compared to more elderly family members who only take up occasional advisory roles in the child’s life (Oburu & Palmérus, 2003). Younger people delved into the nitty-gritty of childrearing such as instilling discipline in children. In fact, these younger, active, and productive members of the community were traditionally, and still are, expected to take care of elders such as grandparents as a reward for the time such elders raised them (Oburu, 2004) (Fig. 1).

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Fig. 1 Map of Kenya (2013) showing the different ethnic communities’ traditional lands. (Source: Kenyan embassy to the UN, Kenya National Bureau of Statistics)

In Kenya, most communities customarily assigned distinct child rearing roles to mothers and fathers. Mothers are charged with taking care of infants’ basic training until the children are able to operate independently (i.e., talk, walk and eat without much assistance). Before becoming independent, the children stayed close to their mothers in the home where usually the mothers serve as homemakers and care providers (Nyagah, 2020; Ellis et al., 2007; Feldman, 1983; Karani, 1987). For male children, after gaining some independence, the fathers were expected to provide a sizable input into their sons’ upbringing. Although the fathers got to know about the development of daughters, they did not play as direct a role in this process. For the Luo and Kipsigis, male children started to learn their traditional sex roles by closely associating with their fathers and other male family members. The same was also true for the girls as they increasingly interacted with their female relatives and other community members. Although this traditional child rearing scenario has undergone change with the times, among them the introduction of hired child-minders and the disruption of traditional family composition through internal migration of family members, aspects of the traditional practices persist. Below are some of the changes and possible impacts on parenting in the Luo and Kipsigis family life.

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The Luo and Kipsigis of Kenya The Luo and Kipsigis are Kenyan ethnic communities who neighbor each other in their traditional lands situated in the Western part of Kenya. The Kipsigis belong to the umbrella Kalenjin linguistic sub-group of ethnic communities; it is its largest member. Other communities in the Kalenjin linguistic sub-group include the Tugen, Nandi, and Maasai among others. In the 2019 census (KNBS, 2019) out of the 47.5 million Kenyans 10.7% were Luo and 13.4% were the Kalenjin community of which the Kipsigis ethnic community is a dominant sub-group. Additionally, the Luo and Kipsigis as two totally distinct ethnic communities, belong to the major Nilotic linguistic group of Africa (Roberts & Bainbridge, 1963). The two communities, however, have different languages and, to a large extent, different ways of life. While the Kipsigis are traditionally herders, the Luo are fishermen. Another major difference between them is that the Kipsigis traditionally practiced, and still do, to some extent, female and male circumcision in addition to teeth excision. The Luo only practice the latter and even that, in a different fashion. The Kipsigis removed two lower front teeth, the Luo removed six. Teeth extraction or nag as the Luo refer to it is a dying cultural practice. Apart from purposes inclusive of vanity and tribal identification, teeth excision had other practical uses. One important use was that the space created by the excised teeth allowed for orally ministering of medicine to patients who suffered debilitation conditions such as lockjaw or were unconscious. Modern medical science and fashion trends have made teeth excision unnecessary. By tradition, among these communities, there were particular ways of raising the young. The instruction and care of all infants was the duty of mothers and their helpers, mostly any female relative available whom the Luo referred to as Japidi (Oburu & Palmérus, 2003). At this age, from birth to about 3 years, the children stayed close to the mothers and received specialized care, such as nursing and hygiene needs. In traditional circumstances only a mother could give such care. As per the traditional division of labor in families, women were caregivers and their duty was to infants and young children (Nyagah, 2020). The mother nurtured the young during their most impressionable years. Motherhood was and is revered among all the ethnic communities in Africa. The mother was and is still the symbol of life of the community. In traditional African communities, where the collective need commonly overrode the individual’s, mothers were the first members of the family to present this social lesson to their children. The mothers, in turn, received this lesson from their mothers. The mothers and their helpers presented such lessons through teachable moments bound to daily life activities. They used a variety of instructional methods such as songs, sayings, proverbs, and play to teach the children the right attitudes and behavior expected of them. The instructional methods and content proceeded from the philosophical tenets of African indigenous education. Among the tenets were that education was a preparation for a successful life in the community, was holistic, was perennial and communal (Sifuna, 1990). The mothers thus depended on chance and contrived teachable moments to train the children as opposed to developing an

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instructional curriculum and an organized plan of education. Such an organized plan of instruction was often prepared for the educational experiences that the growing children were exposed to in community programs such as instruction at circumcision. Mothers punished untoward behavior in various ways depending on its severity. The severity of the behavior hinged on how disruptive of communal and personal peace it was. This punishment ranged from reprimand, age-appropriate learning chores, to infliction of pain such as paddling for children old enough to understand its meaning. Because of this close interaction between the children and their mothers in these formative years, the relationship that grew between them reinforced the important status mothers held in the family and in their children’s eyes, even into their adulthood (Shorter, 1977). Mothers were, and are, revered by their children who consult and defer to them in their major decisions throughout life. Since girls were considered the mothers’ protégés, the mothers acted as the supervisor of a group of females that interacted with and trained the growing girls. This started when the little girls had reached an age of about 3 years, when they could get away from the close supervision of their mothers. These women involved the girls in activities that prepared them for their roles as women in the community. These activities included cookery, agriculture, indigenous architecture, and other care-giving tasks that the community expected of women (Nyagah, 2020; Ellis et al., 2007; Feldman, 1983; Karani, 1987). Although the fathers seldom took direct responsibility in training the girls, the mothers kept them abreast of the girls’ development. However, they got involved when any emergencies, or out-of-the ordinary happening concerning the girls, and even threatening the peace of the community, required their attention. Just as the instruction from mothers was loosely structured or not at all, but conducted on a chance basis, the instruction from female relatives also followed the same format. Among both the Kipsigis and the Luo people, while mothers led a group of female relatives in the instruction of girls, fathers also led a group of male relatives and gradually increased their presence in the boys’ lives. Fathers did this through joint activities. These activities were educational and offered the boys an opportunity to learn their roles and expectations. For instance, in animal herder communities such as the Kipsigis, sons learnt to be herders under the supervision of their fathers and other male relatives. In the same vein, fathers and male relatives taught the Luo boys to be good fishermen. In all these lessons, lack of good judgment was punished as appropriate. The fathers, in their turn, updated the mothers about their sons’ development. As the children grew older and increasingly engaged with community members, they became the responsibility of all in the community while still maintaining a strong attachment to their nuclear families. At the age of about 10 years, more structured instruction was designed for the children in the community. This kind of instruction was additionally contrived when compared to the instruction the children received from their parents and relatives. Some content that involved community members required specialized instructors such as community youth sexuality counselors. Such counselors organized instruction sessions for young people during rites

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of passage into adulthood, such as teeth extraction for the Luo girls and boys. These counselors also taught Kipsigis girls and boys about issues, such as family life, before and during, the circumcision and clitoridectomy sessions. Clitoridectomy, or female genital mutilation (FGM) (Sala & Manara, 2001), as it is currently called, is a practice that is dying among the Kipsigis of Kenya and not practiced by the Luo. In fact, in 2001 the then president Daniel Arap Moi banned the practice for girls less than 18 years. The ban stands although some people still conduct clitoridectomy illegally (ICW, 2004).

Social Strife, Poverty and Disease Unravelling Family Structure With continued industrialization, internal migrations, poverty, disease, and strife, Kenyan ethnic communities have adapted their child-raising practices to the changing times. Initially, with the advent of the colonial period and the reorganization of many families’ structures, grandmothers have, by necessity, played a more active role in childcare. This type of role is an adaptation of the less hands-on tasks they performed as per tradition (Oburu, 2004). This expectation for grandmothers started when the colonists needed and acquired family men to work in the administrative centers they set up all over the country. This process caused a disintegration of the traditional family structure when women took on the work left behind by the men as they moved to the new centers (Srujana, 1996). The women thus spend more time away from home and, therefore, their child-raising duties. The grandmothers stepped in by taking a more active role in the lives of toddlers and children (Oburu & Palmérus, 2003; Adams & Swadener, 2000). Indeed, studies have shown that grandmothers and other non-parental household members may play an important role in children’s cognitive and academic development (Ong’ayi et al., 2020). Poverty has also impacted the child-raising practices among the Luo and Kipsigis of Kenya. Rising levels of poverty, and safety concerns due to internal strife in some areas, has spurred rural urban migrations as people seek paid employment and safety. This has resulted in an exodus of relatives and community members that would traditionally have helped parents in raising their children. Poverty has also meant that families cut back on spending their resources beyond the nuclear family boundaries. This means that it is increasingly untenable for parents to support relatives who would in turn help in raising the children in the family. The family unit is shrinking due to dwindling resources. Later, as mothers needed to take up paid positions in urban centers like the men, many were unable to rely on grandmothers for childcare. The grandmothers remained in the rural homesteads, being unable, often unwilling, and so abhorring the disruption in their lives that would be caused by relocating into urban centers with their childrens’ families, to mind their grandchildren. The parents turned to paid domestic maids and, for ones unable to

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access this help, early childhood education day care centers opened by the government (Adams & Swadener, 2000). Disease, especially HIV/AIDS, has also taken a toll in the traditional family set up. This disease, which targets the most productive age group between 18 and 50 years, because they are the most active sexually, has resulted in many orphaned children in Kenya. In 1999 the then Kenyan president Daniel Arap Moi declared AIDS a “national disaster” and asked leaders to take the front row in fighting it (Dawes, 1999). Because of the increased numbers of orphans, grandparents in most communities in Kenya, including the Luo and Kipsigis, have had to take up active parental duties in their old age (Oburu & Palmérus, 2003). This has commonly resulted in a conflicting situation in which children start life under the enthusiastic but firm hand and watchful eyes of their parents who punish and reward behavior as they deemed necessary for the success of the children. Such children, when suddenly orphaned, find themselves living with their grandparents who are often mellowed with age and are thus unable to take part energetically in the children’s lives. In cases where there are no grandparents or other relatives willing to receive such orphans, the children may even end up in child-headed households and thus miss out on the wisdom of adult guidance in their growth. Lack of such guidance could result in antisocial behavior (Laurenzi et al., 2021). Disease has also given rise to single-parenthood, virtually unheard of in traditional pre-industrial society. All men managed to get wives in the community just as all women got husbands, even if as one of a man’s multiple wives. Diseases such as HIV/AIDS have resulted in children being orphaned or having only one parent. Internal conflict has also given rise to more orphans or single-parent families. Children raised by such parents sometimes miss out on the commonly enriching experience that comes from both parents’ contributing to their development. When a parent is sick or the busy sole provider for the family then he/she may be unable to devote the time necessary to oversee the child’s physical and emotional development. Such parents may not have ample time to play, train and even help their children with homework. With the unraveling of the traditional family network that helped with child care, such parents then depend on alternative child care providers such as nannies and school teachers.

Impact of COVID-19 on Parenting Practices in Kenya Most recently, the COVID-19 pandemic and its attendant restriction to movement has added a new dimension to parenting, where its effects are experienced in different ways in different families. In African countries including Kenya, between April and August 2020 research already showed that the pandemic exacerbated existing inequalities where children who were most at risk and underserved were further excluded from quality education (Human Rights Watch, 2020; Adeniran, 2020). Loss of livelihoods affected what parents can afford to offer their children. Indeed, school closures and promotion of online class lessons affected which

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children could continue with meaningful learning and which had limited to no access to school classes. Children who had more free time definitely needed more watching than those kept busy with online lessons. Additionally, the role of family providers has been hit by job losses that have impacted large numbers of fathers. According to Kenyan Treasury Cabinet Secretary, Mr. Ukur Yattani when releasing the 2021 Economic survey, 740,000 jobs were lost in Kenya due to the COVID-19 pandemic (KNBS, 2021). Most of these jobs were held by men given the gender disparities in employment rates (KNBS, 2017) which showed that whereas 38% of women engaged in paid wage employment a larger 51% men engaged in the same. The family breadwinners who lose their jobs will doubtless be distressed, making them unfit to spend even more time with their children (Laurenzi et al., 2021). Indeed, the current pandemic has had a lot of negative impacts but also some positive ones. Restrictions of movement ensured that parents and, especially, fathers spent a lot more time at home with their children and thus had the chance to offer guidance; a situation acknowledged by studies as important for positive child development (McMunn et al., 2017; Menning, 2006). Rapidly expanding scientific research and enhanced information technology has facilitated the sharing of new information such as this, about the importance of fathers in children’s lives and others about the effect of television on parenting and on many other aspects of life. Below are some features of traditional and evolving parenting practices among the Kenyan Luo and Kipsigis ethnic communities.

Global Trends and Parenting Practices in Kenya Other issues that have affected child rearing practices between the Luo and Kipsigis of Kenya include globalization and especially its ever-increasing awareness of people and cultures across the world. Increased exchange of information in the world, one result of globalization, has had an impact in child rearing practices among Kenyan parents. Parents are able to read results of research on raising children and copy aspects that they favor. These parents are also able to study and adopt aspects of parenting that they admire from various regions of the world. Such information exchange has given rise to institutions that offer baby classes for children, even those under 3 years of age and who would previously still be within close watch of their parents. Indeed, children who are not raised in the traditional way avoid the sex casting of roles in the community that is the bane of their counterparts raised in traditional settings. Whereas children raised in the traditional settings would uphold their expected roles in the community, children brought up according to modern practices or even some aspects of it are able to be creative and choose non-traditional roles for themselves in the community such as girls wanting to be doctors or engineers.

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Conclusion In exploring parenting practices among the Western Kenyan Luo and Kipsigis communities, this chapter has dwelt on the traditional practices and adaptation to modern influences on the family. As is often the reality that social entities are impacted by cultural shifts, the Kenyan family has undergone change brought about by changing times and ways of life. Although the Kenyan family may have shrunk due to internal migration, poverty, disease, and other influences, family members still maintain strong ties to the extended family as much as they are able. Such family ties are manifested in the pride and sense of obligation with which people attend family gatherings during festive seasons or family ceremonies such as weddings and circumcision. In this respect, Kenyan parenting is dynamic and responsive, maintaining traditional elements while simultaneously adapting to modern times. It is noteworthy to mention that the COVID-19 pandemic is currently the biggest threat to parenting in Kenya as people cannot move as freely as they want and so also cannot fully take advantage of extended family help in child care responsibilities. Whereas parents could readily appeal to extended family members for support in taking care of children, the pandemic situation has limited this in terms of who can get in contact with the very young and the very old in families. Additionally, the pandemic spurred loss of jobs which has even further complicated this situation when parents are unable to adequately cater for the needs of their children as required of them and participate in extended family obligations including taking care of the elderly members as they would have done before.

References Adams, D., & Swadener, B. (2000). Early childhood education and teacher development in Kenya: Lessons learned. Child & Youth Care Forum, 29, 385–402. https://doi.org/10.1023/ A:1016601502545 Adeniran, A. (2020). Ensuring learning continuity for every African child in the time of COVID-19 education plus development. https://www.brookings.edu/blog/education-plus-develop ment/2020/06/04/ensuring-learning-continuity-for-every-african-child-in-the-time-of-covid-19/ Brooks, M., & Lasser, J. (2018). Tech generation: Raising balanced kids in a hyper-connected world. Oxford University Press. Dawes, M. (1999). Moi: AIDS a ‘national disaster’. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/538071.stm Dietler, M. & Herbich, I. (1989). Tich Matek: The technology of Luo pottery production and the definition of ceramic style. World Archaeology, 21(1), 148–164. Ellis, A., Cutura, J., Dione, N., Gillson, I., Manuel, C., & Thongori, J. (2007). Gender and economic growth in Kenya: Unleashing the power of women. The World Bank. Feldman, R. (1983). Women’s groups and women’s subordination: An analysis of policies towards rural women in Kenya. Review of African Economy, 10(27/28), 67–85. Human Rights Watch. (2020). Impact of COVID-19 on children’s education in Africa. Retrieved on September 5, 2021 from: https://www.hrw.org/news/2020/08/26/impact-covid-19-childrenseducation-africa

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International Community of Women Living with HIV. (2004). Female genital mutilation FGM. http://www.icw.org/fgm Karani, F. (1987). The situation and roles of women in Kenya: An overview. Journal of Negro Education, 56(3), 422–434. KNBS. (2017). Economic survey highlights. Kenya National Bureau of Statistics. https://www. knbs.or.ke KNBS. (2019). Economic survey highlights. Kenya National Bureau of Statistics. https://www. knbs.or.ke KNBS. (2021). Economic survey 2021 highlights, Kenya National Bureau of Statistics. https:// www.knbs.or.ke Laurenzi, C., et al. (2021). Associations between caregiver mental health and young children’s behaviour in a rural Kenyan sample. Global Health Action, 14, 1. https://doi.org/10.1080/ 16549716.2020.1861909 Madigan, S., Browne, D., Racine, N., Mori, C., & Tough, S. (2019). Association between screen time and children’s performance on a developmental screening test. JAMA Pediatrics, 173(3), 244–250. https://doi-org.libproxy.txstate.edu/10.1001/jamapediatrics.2018.5056 McMunn, A., Martin, P., Kelly, A., & Sacker, L. (2017). Fathers’ involvement: Correlates and consequences for child socioemotional behavior in the United Kingdom. Journal of Family Issues, 38(8), 1109–1131. Menning, C. (2006). Nonresident fathering and school failure. Journal of Family Issues, 27(10). Ministry of Education. (2005). The success of free primary education in Kenya. http://www. education.go.ke/ShowPage.aspx?department=2&id=22 Ndubi, M. (2017). The Makonde: From statelessness to citizenship in Kenya. UNHCR. https:// www.unhcr.org/ke/10581-stateless-becoming-kenyan-citizens.html Nyagah, F. (2020). Shifting responsibilities of household & family: The gendered pandemic in Kenya. Global Communities. https://www.globalcommunities.org/Shifting-Responsibilities-ofHousehold-Family Oburu, P. O. (2004). Social adjustment of Kenyan orphaned grandchildren, perceived caregiving stresses and discipline strategies used by their fostering grandmothers. Department of Psychology, Göteborg University, Sweden. Oburu, P., & Palmérus, K. (2003). Parenting stress and self-reported discipline strategies of Kenyan caregiving grandmothers. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 27(6), 505–512. Ong’ayi, D., Dede Yildirim, E., & Roopnarine, J. (2020). Fathers’, mothers’, and other household members’ involvement in reading, storytelling, and play and preschoolers’ literacy skills in Kenya. Early Education and Development, 31(3), 442–454. https://doi-org.libproxy.txstate. edu/10.1080/10409289.2019.1669125 Roberts, D., & Bainbridge, D. (1963). Nilotic physique. Journal of Physical Anthropology, 21, 341–370. Sala, R., & Manara, D. (2001). Nurses and requests for female genital mutilation: Cultural rights versus human rights. Nursing Ethics, 8, 247–258. Schmidt, M., Pempek, T., Kirkorian, H., Lund, A., & Anderson, D. (2008). The effects of background television on the toy play of very young children. Child Development, 79, 1137–1151. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.2008.01180.x Shorter, E. (1977). The making of the modern family. Harper Collin. Sifuna, N. D. (1990). Development of education in Africa: The Kenyan experience. Initiatives. Society for Research in Child Development. (2008). Parents should limit young children’s exposure to background TV. Science Daily. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/07/0807150714 52.htm Srujana, K. (1996). Status of women in Kenya: A sociological study. Kalinga Publications. Wambugu, J., & Mokoena, S. (2017). The effect of cost-sharing policy on the dropout rates of public secondary school students in Limuru District, Kenya. Journal of Asian and African studies., 52(7), 1011–1021.

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Pamela Akinyi Wadende is a senior lecturer at Kenya’s Kisii University, where she teaches and supervises graduate students from East Africa and other parts of the world. She holds a Masters in Educational Psychology from Kenyatta University, Kenya and a Ph.D. in Adult, Professional and Community Education from Texas State University at San Marcos. She is interested in how human beings acquire and change behavior across the life span, and she believes that environmental factors heavily shape developmental outcomes. Successful interventions should therefore target individual environments and experiences in order to facilitate behavioral changes such as learning new content or embracing new health practices. Some of her publications include; An eco-cultural approach to early childhood development. Lancet Glob Health. 2021 Mar;9(3):e229–e230. doi: 10.1016/ S2214-109X (20)30521-0. Epub 2020 Dec 17. PMID: 33341151. Among other publication centered on family health and development. Jon Lasser is a professor in the School Psychology Program at Texas State University. He holds a master’s degree in Human Sexuality Education from the University of Pennsylvania, and a doctorate in School Psychology from the University of Texas at Austin. He has served as Chair of the Institutional Review Board (IRB), Associate Dean for Research in the College of Education, and Program Coordinator for the School Psychology Program. His books include Tech Generation: Raising Balanced Kids in a Hyper-Connected World (Oxford University Press), School Psychologist as Counselor: a Practitioner’s Handbook (National Association of School Psychologists), and a series of social-emotional learning books with the American Psychological Association’s Magination Press (Grow Happy, Grow Grateful, Grow Kind, & What Boys Do). Kathleen Fite is a retired, Professor Emerita, College of Education, Texas State University. She specializes in development and learning across the lifespan, with emphasis on early childhood. She is an international advocate for children and education, author, researcher, and consultant.

Parenting in a Rainbow Nation: A South African Perspective on Parenting Nicolette V. Roman and Fatiema Benjamin

Introduction Parenting is one mechanism that is of significant importance in child development. It is in the parent-child interaction and relationship that a child learns appropriate vs inappropriate behavior, right vs wrong choices in decision making, skills, and to understand roles and accept (or not) the norms of a community. Parenting has been and is a controversial topic because there is no single prescriptive book for parents showing them how to raise their children, which can sometimes become challenging. The reciprocal nature of the parent-child relationship calls for a different parenting approach at different stages in the development of the child, which makes understanding parenting quite complex (Knauer et al., 2019; Kuppens & Ceulemans, 2019; Meier et al., 2018). A child in infancy or early childhood will be parented differently from a child in middle childhood or adolescence. Added to this complexity is the diversity of culture and socio-economic status. This is especially prominent in a country such as South Africa (Hall & Posel, 2019; Romero et al., 2018). As of 2021, South Africa has an estimated population of over 60 million people spread across nine provinces with different levels of socio-economic status. The inhabitants of South Africa are called the ‘rainbow nation’ because of their diverse cultures, languages and ethnic groups or races. During the era of apartheid, people were designated as White, Black African, Coloured (people of mixed race) and Asian/Indian. South Africa also has 11 official languages. To a large extent, South Africa’s socio-political history encouraged this diversity based on the principles of separation and segregation (Ginwala, 1990).

N. V. Roman (✉) · F. Benjamin Centre for Interdisciplinary Studies of Children, Families and Society, University of the Western Cape, Cape Town, South Africa e-mail: [email protected]; [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_2

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Before 1994, the National Party imposed stringent laws and passes as control strategies separating groups of people into white and non-white (Black African, Coloured and Indian) people. These control strategies included Pass Laws, the Groups Areas Act, the Migrant Labour System and Influx Control. Segregation occurred at all levels, including resources, services, education, and transportation. Religion was another factor that the National Party used to wield its power. For example, it encouraged a patriarchal society, based on biblical beliefs, with the belief that women had to be subservient, were considered minors and therefore could not access resources without the permission of a male person in the family. With regard to parenting, the belief was that if you “spare the rod, you spoil the child” and therefore harsh, authoritarian parenting was the approach used to discipline children or minors. In order for non-whites, especially Black Africans, to enter white areas, they needed to have a pass and their presence within a specific location had a time limit of72 h. Non-adherence to the laws meant arrest. This meant that many people were unemployed and urban family life was destroyed. Families could ill afford the income loss because of their dependence on the meagre earnings of the breadwinner in the family (especially the father). The arrests also meant that many women were left to head their households (consisting of children, old and disabled family members) and the survival of the family was constantly threatened (Bernstein, 1985; Posel, 1991). As a result of the dire socio-economic circumstances, women were forced to access ‘forbidden’ areas for work, and care of the children was left to grandmothers and other female family members. All these laws, which formed the system of apartheid, led to the eventual breakdown and disintegration of husbands and wives, parents and children and general family life, ultimately affecting South African family structures (Hall & Posel, 2019). The impact of apartheid left deeply entrenched scars of pain, anxiety and fear. At the same time, these scars became the driving force behind the struggle against the oppression of apartheid. On a daily basis, the struggle for many women was to maintain the existence of their families, continue relationships with their husbands, have their children with them, and be allowed to work in the towns. In the two decades since the abolishment of apartheid, many changes have evolved. People previously categorized as non-white have more access to resources. Corporal punishment was removed in schools and people are able to live in previously advantaged areas and children to attend schools in these areas. Socioeconomically, there are opportunities for growth and development across all groups of people. Despite the decolonization process within South Africa, which exposes and dismantles the colonial power in its many forms (van der Wal, 2018), the scourge of apartheid continues to run deep. The divide is clearly indicated geographically, with the majority of poor people still being non-white and living in the areas allocated by the National Party. Socio-economically, the divide is still based on race and class with Whites having supremacy. Therefore, families continue to be affected by the ever-changing socio-economic situation in the country and global crises, such as the COVID-19 pandemic.

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What has clearly changed is the advocacy for strengthening and supporting the family, the development and implementation of the Children’s Act (Act 38 of 2005), which affords more rights to children, and less focus on religion being a tool for discipline and punishment. While evidently there have been some improvements, life is still difficult for parents and children, and this could have later behavioral outcomes once the children grow up. The South African parent faces many different challenges. According to the 2020 General Household Survey (Statistics South Africa, 2021), • 11.4% of people lived in informal structures, commonly referred to as shacks or shanties. This percentage decreased from 15.4% in 2007. It is likely that this is due to the rapid growth of households receiving some kind of government assistance to access housing. There are proportionately fewer households living in shacks in provinces such as Limpopo and KwaZulu-Natal as compared to the Western Cape and Gauteng provinces. The percentage of households living in informal dwellings was on the increase in the Northern Cape. • Household size in South Africa largely consisted of 2–3 persons (36.6%). This was most common in Free State (44.6%) and least common in Limpopo (28.9%). Households that consisted of six or more people were more notable in rural areas (23.9%) than urban areas (11.3%). • Between July–September 2020 and July–September 2021, the unemployment rate increased from 30.8% to 34.9% respectively. There was a significant increase in households receiving at least one social grant between the years 2003 (30.8%) and 2019 (45.5%) before sharply increasing in 2020 (52.4%). The COVID-19 Social Relief of Distress (SRD) grant is believed to have contributed to this as 5.3% of respondents 18 years and older received the SRD grant. This increased the percentage of households that benefitted from social grants by 3.5%. • Households that were vulnerable to hunger decreased from 11.7% in 2006 to 10.8% in 2020. In contrast, households with limited access to food increased from 17.8% to 20.6% between 2019 and 2020. • Although 51.1% of the South African population is female, female-headed households remain more challenged when compared to male-headed households, especially in larger rural areas. For instance, it was estimated that 51% of households in the Eastern Cape are female-headed, followed by KwaZulu-Natal (48.8%). The gender differences are prominent in education with 9.3% of men aged 20 years and above having no formal education as compared to 10.7% of women. However, this number has significantly decreased since 2002 (26.7% and 30% respectively), reducing the gender gaps in education. In general, the main indicators of poverty showed improvement during the period 2006 to 2020. The General Household Survey (Statistics South Africa, 2021) showed an improvement in education, health, employment, food security, access to services and facilities such as water, electricity and sanitation which contributed to an increase in the improvement of living circumstances. However, the COVID-19

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pandemic significantly contributed to an increase in some of these areas, such as unemployment, food insecurity, and children attending educational facilities, between 2019 and 2020. Therefore, the COVID-19 pandemic significantly exacerbated the challenges many South African families already faced pre-pandemic (Adebiyi et al., 2021). This is particularly true since the COVID-19 pandemic resulted in significant job losses and put the world into a recession, undermining decades of poverty reduction progress (United Nations, 2020). In the revised White Paper on Families in South Africa (2021), the family is mentioned as having the potential to enhance individual and society wellbeing, including socioeconomic wellbeing. However, the reality of family life is indicated by single motherhood, the impact of HIV/AIDS and the COVID-19 pandemic, teenage pregnancy, the gendered nature of care, absentee fathers, substance use, gender-based violence, crime, and the impact of violence and engagement in at-risk behavior of youth, all of which continue to crucially affect families in South Africa. Some of these issues will be discussed later in the chapter. There are serious challenges that South African parents have to deal with while trying to be the best possible parents they can be in order to raise well-adjusted adults. How do we understand parenting then within these challenging contexts? Although there has been a growth in literature, there is limited South African research information with regard to parenting styles and thus there is no clear picture as to a definitive style of parenting. In general, and in a sense based on the sociopolitical history of the experiences of South African parents and families, resilience has been central to coping within challenging contexts. This would mean that parents provide support, warmth and care in most families. Additionally, cultural traditions have been the mechanism of transferring beliefs and values and the mechanisms through which children are raised (Sahithya et al., 2019). This would naturally be culture-specific and based on the traditions followed in the different cultures. Families were able to cope because of kinship networks which enabled social control and a sense of collectivity. According to Makiwane and Kaunda (2018) modernization has the potential to cause division in families, resulting in African societies becoming more individualized. Therefore, the emphasis has moved more towards individualism and there are more social problems and families are more challenged. In order to examine parenting in South Africa, as a developing country, there is often a dependency on Western theoretical perspectives.

Theoretical Underpinning of Parenting Styles and Practices All parents have a different approach in the way they raise their children. Some parents allow the child to do as he or she pleases, while some parents are very restrictive in what they allow. Parents are the primary agents in the process of socializing their children with the purpose of encouraging their children to become participants in a community as responsible adults (Kuppens & Ceulemans, 2019; Kalil & Ryan, 2020; Lee & Kreutzer, 2021). Ultimately, the way in which parents

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raise their children is related to the child’s behavioral outcomes and his or her behavior as an adult. Baumrind (1966, 1967, 1968, 1978) was one of the first researchers to look at parenting styles. She first proposed three styles of parenting identified as authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive parenting styles. Subsequent parenting research identified the involved parent (Maccoby & Martin, 1983) and the traditional parent (Baumrind, 1987). Authoritative parents have structures and rules in place when raising their children, but they also encourage their children to provide input in decision-making in the family and provide reasons for rules and structures. Authoritative parenting is warm, supportive, encouraging, accepting and responsive. Permissive or indulgent parents are accepting, assenting and have a benevolent and compassionate manner towards the child’s impulses and actions. The parent becomes a resource rather than the socialisation agent to shape and change the child’s behavior and will not apply rules and structures when raising the child. Authoritarian parents are extremely restrictive in communication. Obedience is very important and compliance is often physically and harshly enforced. The authoritarian parent appears harsh, stern, strict and cruel without warmth and tenderness towards the child. Uninvolved parents are often neglectful, indifferent and dismissive. They may offer little to no supervision, be emotionally distant and unable to support their children emotionally. The traditional parent is known to have a “non-lenient” approach to parenting (Baumrind, 1987, p. 110). Traditional parents spend time with their children, and discipline and religion are central to the family and the community. Subsequently, there are strong beliefs in the family that are maintained through various cultural traditions. These styles are continuously being researched for in order to understand the effects each might have on behavior (Suárez-Relinque et al., 2019; Goering & Mrug, 2021; Mak et al., 2020). For example, the effect of authoritarian parenting results in children exhibiting internalizing and externalizing behavioral problems (Steele & McKinney, 2019). They have poor self-esteem outcomes, decreased benevolence (Martinez et al., 2020), and aggressive behavior (Latouf & Dunn, 2010; Masud et al., 2019; Anjum et al., 2019). They often exhibit delinquent behavior (Tapia et al., 2018; Kuppens & Ceulemans, 2019) and have higher academic achievement (Yang & Zhao, 2020). Children raised by permissive or indulgent parents often perform badly at school and are more likely to engage in risk-taking behavior such as substance abuse (Baumrind, 1991). They usually rank low in happiness, selfregulation and self-control (Abci Joseph & Mathew, 2022) and have trouble establishing any form of relationship or friendship (Sahithya et al., 2019). This form of parenting stimulates children to be bad-mannered, egocentric and demanding (Baumrind, 1997). Authoritative parents promote children’s sense of individualism and enhance self-development (Baumrind, 1991). These children become well-adjusted adults (McKinney et al., 2016). They make secure attachments in later relationships (Doinita & Maria, 2015), have improved academic performance and competence (Jabagchourian et al., 2014; Yang & Zhao, 2020) and show

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autonomous decision-making (Jabagchourian et al., 2014). They develop interpersonal skills and take responsibility (Llorca et al., 2017). Children of uninvolved parents have similar behavioral and emotional outcomes as children raised by permissive or indulgent parents. The outcomes include being emotionally withdrawn, experiencing fear, anxiety and stress, having difficulty forming emotional attachments and exhibiting inappropriate behavior in social settings (Joseph & Mathew, 2022; Barton & Hirsch, 2016). Parenting research in South Africa has grown but it remains limited in terms of parenting styles and practices. Studies in South Africa specifically using the parenting styles constructs (authoritarian, authoritative and permissive) had children in early childhood (Latouf & Dunn, 2010), adolescents (Davids et al., 2015; Roman et al., 2015) and young adults (Roman et al., 2016; Papageorgiou & Callaghan, 2018) as participants in their studies. In early childhood, which in South Africa is age 0 to 9 years, the results of the study conducted by Latouf and Dunn (2010), show that the authoritative parenting style resulted in more acceptable behavior, while previous research by Moremi (2002) had inconsistent findings to previous relationships and found no direct relationships with children’s socio-emotional adjustment at school. In adolescence (Davids et al., 2015) and young adulthood (Roman et al., 2016) authoritative parenting styles were perceived as the most prevalent parenting style in both mothers and fathers. Mothers were perceived to be more dominant in their parenting, which could be explained by the amount of time mothers spend with their children. There are similarities and inconsistencies for parenting styles in South Africa as compared to the findings of research in other countries. Research is now examining positive and negative parenting with literature suggesting that stressful environments, experiences and conditions increase parents’ use of negative parenting (Blacher et al., 2013). However, parenting styles do not provide an understanding of what parents actually do in positive and negative parenting, and that parenting styles are in fact an ‘umbrella’ for more practical applications of parenting. In this way the context becomes relevant. A theory that focuses on parental practices is Self-Determination Theory. Self-Determination Theory (SDT) states that in order for any individual to be psychologically well and strive towards reaching his or her optimal potential, three basic psychological needs have to be satisfied: relatedness, autonomy and competence (Deci & Ryan, 1985; Krause et al., 2019; Jeno et al., 2018). For relatedness to be satisfied an individual would need to experience a sense of belonging. The satisfaction of autonomy affords an individual the space to make decisions, have self-control and self-regulated behavior, while at the same time maintaining close ties with the parent. Being competent means feeling able, knowledgeable and skilled in a task. When these needs are not met the individual will be frustrated and lack the motivation to progress. In addition to having these needs met, SDT emphasises that the environment or context becomes the conduit for enhancing or hindering the satisfaction of these needs (Krause et al., 2019). In essence, when an environment is enhancing, it is supportive, but when it is hindering, then it creates a controlling environment.

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Supportive parenting is defined as being involved, warm, nurturing, caring parents who provide structure for their children (Seay et al., 2014). These parents encourage self-initiation and acknowledge the child’s perspective and feelings. As involved parents, they act as a resource for their children and take an interest in their activities. They spend more time with their children and know more about what they are doing in their daily lives and therefore apply monitoring principles. In providing structure, children are taught limits and boundaries such as how to eat properly at a table, to respect others and their possessions and go to bed at an appropriate time. Parenting is conducted in a way that provides “reasons and purposes for doing activities; communicating expectations that are optimally challenging; explaining and consistently administering consequences and providing informational feedback” (Grolnick et al., 1997, p. 147). In this way, children know what to expect and subsequently feel more secure because they know what the consequences of their behavior are. It is suggested that positive parenting acts as a buffer for delinquent problems in children (Boeldt et al., 2012). It significantly impacts child self-esteem and improves academic achievement (Batool, 2020) and helps children to thrive and acts as a buffer in stressful environments (Maepa et al., 2015; Romero et al., 2018). The outcome of supportive parenting is self-regulation, self-control and selfdetermination. Overall, children raised by supportive parents acquire problemsolving skills and are competent and generally well-adjusted in later phases of development. Studies in South Africa focusing on autonomy-supportive parenting have shown that when mothers use autonomy-supportive parenting, children are psychologically well with the majority having higher scores on tests of self-esteem and satisfaction with life. In addition, it has been reported that this parenting practice contributes to the positive adjustment of students in their first year of university, and could be depicting the relationship between positive parenting, positive behavior, and a child’s wellbeing (Daniels et al., 2019). A cross-cultural study in the area of supportive parenting included participants from South Africa (McNeely & Barber, 2010). They found consistent results, across the different participating countries, indicating similarities in adolescents’ perceptions of supportive parenting. Variability was found in supportive parenting also being perceived as guidance and advice, which were additional aspects not indicated in the Western sample. Guidance and advice encouraged parent-adolescent closeness, but this might have been a cultural indicator of parental love and support. Additionally, in a review conducted by Davids et al. (2017), autonomy-supportive parenting and encouragement by parents were found to be associated with behaviors that promote child and adolescent health. While limits, boundaries and monitoring are imperative in order for children to feel safe, secure and well-adjusted, being overly involved could result in controlling parenting. Children may perceive this “as pressure to think, feel or behave in specified ways” (Deci & Ryan, 1985, p. 95). Controlling parenting is defined as “control attempts that intrude into the psychological and emotional development of the child (e.g., thinking processes, self-expression, emotions and attachment to parents)” (Barber, 1996, p. 3296). A form of controlling parenting, as a more negative type of parenting, is psychological control, which is indicated by behaviors such as intrusiveness, parental direction and control through guilt, possessiveness,

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protectiveness, nagging, negative evaluation, strictness and punishment. Barber (1996, p. 3297) describes psychological control as “insidious” which potentially inhibits psychological development through manipulation and exploitation of the parent-child bond (love withdrawal and guilt induction), negative, affect-laden expressions and criticisms (disappointment and shame), and excessive personal control (possessiveness and protectiveness). There is a distinct difference between psychological and behavioral control. Behavioral control is used by parents as an attempt to control and manage the behavior of their children (Barber, 1996; Barber et al. 2012). According to Barber (1996, p. 3299), psychological control is “inhibitive”, while behavioral control is “facilitative”. Behavioral control is important so that children can have structure, limits, boundaries and parameters in their interaction with others. Behavioral control is also important for parents to monitor their children’s activities. This process of control is especially important for children living in high-risk environments where there is the constant threat of being coerced to participate in gang-related activities and crime (a phenomenon that is quite common in South African communities). The outcome of psychologically controlling parenting for the behavior and adjustment of children has been presented in research studies. These studies have linked psychological control to low self-esteem levels, anxiety, depression, higher drop-out rates at school, maladaptive learning attitudes, substance abuse, and risky cyber behavior (Deneault et al., 2020; Rogers et al., 2020; Romm & Metzger, 2018). Research conducted in this area of parenting has in the main been conducted in Western counties. The argument is often that the results of parenting research conducted in Western countries may not necessarily reflect that of non-western countries and therefore should not be generalized to other countries. Significant differences were found in parenting research, as parenting styles and practices varies across cultures (Mousavi & Juhari, 2019), but in some instances, there are also similarities (Devlin et al., 2018). In reference to psychologically controlling parenting in South Africa, research findings are similar to that found in other countries which found that the psychological control of parents can lead to both internalizing and externalizing behavioral and emotional problems (León-Del-Barco et al., 2019). For example, Roman et al. (2012) found a relationship between psychologicallycontrolling parenting and anti-social behaviour in young adults. They also found that maternal psychological control was a stronger predictor of anti-social behaviour than paternal psychological control. This is supported by a cross-cultural study conducted by Barber et al. (2012) who found that parental psychological control significantly predicted depression and anti-social behavior in adolescents. Similarly, Roman (2008) found a significantly negative relationship between maternal psychological control and child self-esteem and satisfaction with life. In the same study, psychological control was significantly positively related to conflict, and negatively related to cohesion, organisation and independence in the family. The research conducted in South Africa produced similar results as studies conducted in Western countries, suggesting the negative effects of psychologically controlling parenting.

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What is important in parenting research and practice is that Westernised research and practices are contextualised and specific to a culture so that parenting interventions have an impact.

Parenting in a Challenging South African Environment While it is important to understand the effect of different parenting approaches on child outcomes, often other types of parental behaviours and parent-child interactions are considered in South African research due to the challenging environments prevalent. A report published by Statistics South Africa (2020) indicates that approximately 16.2% of women and 26.7% of men aged 15–34 years started sexual intercourse before the age of 16 years; 5.4% of women and 20.2% of men reported having multiple sexual partners in the 12 months before the survey; 29.3% of women and 60.3% of men consumed alcohol. Additionally, it is estimated that 67% of children were exposed to some form of violence at home or in the community (Patel et al., 2021) and 64.4% of South African youth (15–24 years old) were unemployed by the second quarter of 2021 (Trading Economics, 2022). Although the National Development Plan (2030) aims to reduce inequality and eliminate poverty by promoting gender equality and better educational and economic opportunities, these statistics paint a sad picture of the current status of youth and often this can be traced to parental behavior and family life. For instance, parents participating in a study conducted by Goldschmidt et al. (2021) reported that parental substance abuse and exposure to violence significantly affects parental nurturance. Thus, the nurturing relationship between a parent and child is affected by environmental challenges that many South African families face. Furthermore, Jordaan and Hesselink (2018) conducted a study on criminogenic factors associated with youth sex offenders. They found that substance abuse and parental absence play a contributory role to the criminal behavior of offenders, suggesting that many participants within their sample received inadequate parental support and grew up in singleparent households. The South African Institute of Race Relations (2011) proposes that the structure of families may be a key factor in negative child outcomes.

Parenting Children with Disabilities Childhood disabilities can impact a child’s development into adulthood and can include physical, mental, intellectual, and sensory impairments that compromise that child’s wellbeing and ability to participate in society (Mathye & Eksteen, 2016). Caring for a child with a disability often contributes to stress and strain experienced within families as it often requires greater involvement from parents and caregivers. As a result, families experience various difficulties including separation or divorce,

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poor family relationships, difficulties in caring for other children (Mkabile & Swartz, 2020) and disruptions in their daily routines (Jackson & Andipatin, 2021). In addition, parents often require substantial resources when caring for a disabled child, including money and access to services. Unfortunately, these are resources many South African families struggle with. This is particularly true as disabled children and their families are among the most marginalized groups in South Africa (van der Mark et al., 2019). This contributes to the barriers families face in caring for their disabled children. For instance, a study conducted by Pretorius and Steadman (2018) found that financial strain, stigma, lack of social support, lack of access to services, lack of information, lack of transport, and geographical location serves as barriers for caregivers caring for a child with a disability. These barriers may influence parents’ experiences in parenting their children. Having social support in the process of parenting can substantially improve caregiving quality (Bizzego et al., 2021). However, this is not always the case for many families in South Africa. A study conducted by Davids et al. (2021) found that parenting a child with a hearing loss is experienced as lonely due to parents being socially isolated. This is due to study participants indicating that they receive no support from family members. This social isolation and lack of support are often related to lack of knowledge, stigmatisation from family and community members, as well as cultural beliefs that disability is a result of witchcraft, God’s decision, punishment from ancestors, and the customary practice of disabled children being rejected in some South African cultures (Pretorius & Steadman, 2018; Mathye & Eksteen, 2016). However, a paucity of research exists related to parenting practices in parenting a child with a disability within the South African context.

The Effect of Family Structure on Parent-Child Relationships Marital status has been identified as an important factor in the behavior and adjustment of children. Often the comparison is drawn between single and married parent families or male- and female-headed households. Often, it is the single female parent or female household head that is portrayed as having more challenges than her married counterpart (Hatch & Posel, 2018; Heintz-Martin & Langmeyer, 2020). Historically, apartheid created and maintained the status of the single female parent heading the household due to the Migrant Labour System. Research in postapartheid South Africa shows this phenomenon of single motherhood is still prevalent. For example, the General Household Survey (2021) indicates that 41.9% of households in South Africa were female-headed households with 50% in rural areas and 38.4% in urban areas. Similarly, 43.1% of children between the ages of 0–17 years lived with mothers only, 3.3% with fathers, 33.8% with both biological parents, and 19.8% lived with neither parent (General Household Survey, 2019). According to a review by September et al. (2017), mothers with higher income, higher education, and married status were more responsive to their children than those with less education, lower income, and single status. However, Davids et al.

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(2015) found no significant differences between single and two-parent families in terms of perceived parenting styles, adolescent decision making, and healthy lifestyle behaviors. In reality, most female-headed households are viewed as having lower education levels, lower incomes, and many structural disadvantages (Jacobs & Andrews, 2021; Agnafors et al., 2019). A single mother is often faced with the most challenging circumstances and this is frequently related to the parent-child relationship. South African research studies comparing child outcomes and parental involvement in married and single-parent households present contrasting findings. For example, regardless of marital status, there were no significant differences in the way children perceived their mother’s parenting (Roman, 2011). Mother-child selfesteem was significantly positively correlated regardless of marital status and socioeconomic status (Roman, 2008). Makwakwa’s study (2011) suggests that young adults raised in households with both parents were more thorough in their decisionmaking styles than young people raised in single-parent households. According to Jordaan and Hesselink (2018) children who are raised in single-parent families would more than likely engage in risk-taking behaviour. The focus of single parenting is often gendered with the focus being on mothers. Fathers are often silent in single parenting because fathers are not taking on the responsibility of fatherhood. In 2017, it was recorded that 62% of children 0–17 years old had an absent father (Mkhwanazi et al., 2018), indicating that a substantial number of children grow up without their fathers present in their lives. Research related to fathers and fatherhood is an emerging field in South Africa as there is the realisation of the importance of understanding fathers’ experiences in parenting and that intervention with fathers could improve conditions for children (Lesch & Kelapile, 2016; Hosegood et al., 2016; Freeks, 2020; Jackson & Andipatin, 2021; Lachman et al., 2016). Father involvement is also found to be regulated by mothers. For example, Makusha and Richter (2016) found that within married couples, mothers often regulate father involvement in childrearing and interactions, care, and housework whereas single mothers would control father-child access and involvement largely due to the father’s inability to provide economically and lack of emotional support. Additionally, Morrell et al. (2012) and Swartz and Bhana (2009), in their book Books and babies: Pregnancy and young parents in schools and Teenage Tata: Voices of young fathers in South Africa provide insight into the challenging issue of teenage parenthood and its effects on teenage mothers and fathers. While the debate continues both locally and internationally regarding the effect of family structure on parenting and child adjustment, what is clear is that these factors often play a major role in the process of parenting.

Parenting: Culture and Diversity Some researchers in South Africa have compared parenting in different social contexts. The issue of race or ethnicity is never quite discussed as there is always the possibility of portraying one race against another, and there is also the sense that

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the term ‘race’ has negative connotations for many South Africans. So if we examine the research in South Africa the findings of the effect of parenting in particular studies may be quite different from findings in parenting research in other countries if races are compared. The researchers of these studies support this and therefore caution against generalization. Thus the research which focuses on parenting in different ethnic groups provides the following information: • Roman et al. (2016) conducted a comparative study with a cross-sectional research design. The majority of their sample identified as black African (67.6%) followed by coloured, and white. This study compared parenting styles in different ethnic groups. The findings suggest that the young adult participants perceived authoritative parenting styles to be more prevalent than any other parenting style. However, in comparing mothers’ and fathers’ perceived parenting styles within and between groups, there were significant differences. Within the black African and coloured groups, fathers scored significantly lower than mothers in all three parenting styles whereas, within the white group, there were no significant differences in perceived mothers’ and fathers’ parenting styles. For between groups, only fathers were perceived as significantly different in their parenting styles, and not mothers • Jordaan and Hesselink (2018) conducted a qualitative study to explore and identify the criminogenic factors associated with youth sex offenders. Their sample consisted of nine black Africans and two coloured participants. Although no ethnic differences were identified, it was found that nine of the 11 participants aged 18–20 years indicated that their parents (including stepparents and grandparents) abused substances and that they themselves abused substances before or during the committed offence. Moreover, the offending youth reported growing up with absent fathers and single parents and attributed these experiences to their poor parent-child relationships and insufficient parental involvement and supervision. • Davids et al. (2015) conducted a study that aimed to describe the prevalence of perceived parenting styles, decision-making styles, and healthy lifestyle behaviours and compare these between one and two-parent families in a rural area. Participants consisted of 457 grade 9 learners from two-parent families (69.4%) and single-parent families (30.6%). Researchers found no significant differences between parenting styles, decision-making styles, and healthy lifestyle behaviors as authoritative parenting styles, vigilant decision making, and engaging in healthy lifestyle behaviors were the most prevalent in both single and two-parent families. • Latouf and Dunn’s (2010) study found that different dimensions in each parenting style elicit different social behavioural outcomes in five-year-olds based on parents’ reports. This multi-cultural study found that the higher fathers are rated as using verbal hostility (dimension of authoritarian style), the higher the teacher rates acceptable social behaviour from the five-year-old child. However, different behavioural outcomes were identified when parents use punitive parenting in that

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•

•

•

•

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the higher the mother rates the father as using punitive parenting the higher the teacher rates the five-year-old as aggressive. And the higher the father rates the mother as using punitive parenting the higher the teacher rates disrespect in the child. Coert et al. (2021) conducted a cross-sectional comparative study among 160 single teen mothers from a low socioeconomic community. The purpose of this study was to compare parental efficacy and social support across different family systems. This study found no significant differences between single teen mothers living with one parent or single teen mothers living with two parents. Makwakwa (2011) had a majority Black African sample in her study. This study was conducted with university students in the phase of emerging adulthood. In a retrospective study, she examined the relationship between parenting styles and the decision-making styles of emerging adults. The results suggest that the authoritative parenting style is the prevalent style used by parents and is significantly positively correlated to the thoughtful decision-making of emerging adults. There were also significant differences between the parenting styles of mothers and fathers. The results suggest that mothers were more authoritative, authoritarian and permissive than fathers. In their study, Ganz et al. (2020) found that parents who overestimate support for violent parenting are more likely to use violence against their children themselves. This was found among parents of children 2–7 years old in both Ocean View and Khayelitsha, which are both considered peri-urban settlements. De Jager (2011) compared White and Coloured adolescents’ relationships with their mothers, fathers, best friends and romantic partners. Adolescents had stronger mother-adolescent relationships than father-adolescent relationships as indicated by nurturance, support, satisfaction, affection and intimacy. This study found that Coloured adolescents viewed their mothers as more important than their fathers when compared to a group of White adolescents. Additionally, adolescents from high socio-economic households were more satisfied with their relationships with their fathers than adolescents from middle to low-income households. Furthermore, Coloured adolescents living in middle and low-income households reported more punishment and conflict in relationships. Bomester (2012) examined the parent-adolescent relationship in a Coloured low-socioeconomic community and found strong mother-daughter and fatherson relationships. In general, mothers spent more time with the adolescent-child than fathers did.

These research studies were the studies available and accessible but may not provide definitive information regarding parenting in South Africa. What do these studies tell us? • Maternal parenting has a stronger effect on child and youth outcomes than fathers. As a developing country, there could be remnants of the patriarchal

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ideologies of apartheid with males being providers and women caring for children or the family (Makusha & Richter, 2016). Parents’ perceptions of parenting influence their parenting practices which in turn significantly contribute to child behavioural outcomes. The traditional parenting style (Baumrind, 1987) could still be dominant in certain ethnic groups, particularly in the Black African group. • The majority of research studies suggest that parents use a more authoritative style of parenting. • There are differences across races or ethnic and socio-economic status groups but not necessarily between family structures in terms of support for children. Children raised in low socio-economic environments experience more hostility and conflict in relationships with their parents. Parenting differences in socioeconomic status groups could be due to families or parents experiencing more stressors. So although parenting differs across ethnic groups, differences become more prominent when comparing socio-economic groups. In South Africa, race, socio-economic status and geographical location continue to be intertwined as created during apartheid, although the laws have changed.

Conclusion Trying to describe parenting in South Africa can be quite a challenge as there is so much diversity. What may be prominent in one culture may not necessarily be found in another. Historically, South Africa has evolved from an oppressive patriarchal society into a democratic society. However, these patriarchal beliefs are still prominent in many South African cultures. The existence of the family during apartheid was constantly under threat and parents struggled to maintain cohesion in the family. Today, there are different challenges, such as substance abuse, teenage pregnancy, single parenting, HIV/AIDS, and global crises such as COVID-19, which threaten the existence and wellbeing of the family. In order to understand the parenting approaches used in South Africa, Western theories are used to understand parenting in South Africa. Thus, constructs such as parenting styles and practices may have similar and different meanings when applied to South African parenting. South African research presents authoritative parenting as prevalent and linked to more positive outcomes for children. Additionally, the mother-child relationship is identified as stronger than the father-child relationship in families. However, there is an increase in literature focusing on fatherhood and factors regulating father-child interactions. What is clear is that there are different parent-child relationships and parenting approaches across different ethnic groups with additions of socioeconomic status and education.

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Roman, N. V., Human, A., & Hiss, D. (2012). Young South African adults’ perceptions of parental psychological control and antisocial behavior. Social Behavior and Personality: An International Journal, 40(7), 1163–1173. Roman, N. V., Makwakwa, T., & Lacante, M. (2016). Perceptions of parenting styles in South Africa: The effects of gender and ethnicity. Cogent Psychology, 3(1), 1153231. Roman, N. V., Davids, E. L., Moyo, A., Schilder, L., Lacante, M., & Lens, W. (2015). Parenting styles and psychological needs influences on adolescent life goals and aspirations in a South African setting. Journal of Psychology in Africa, 25(4), 305–312. Romero, R. H., Hall, J., Cluver, L., & Meinck, F. (2018). Can supportive parenting protect against school delay amongst violence-exposed adolescents in South Africa? Child Abuse & Neglect, 78, 31–45. Romm, K. F., & Metzger, A. (2018). Parental psychological control and adolescent problem behaviors: The role of depressive symptoms. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 27(7), 2206–2216. Sahithya, B. R., Manohari, S. M., & Vijaya, R. (2019). Parenting styles and its impact on children: A cross-cultural review with a focus on India. Mental Health, Religion & Culture, 22(4), 357–383. Seay, A., Freysteinson, W. M., & McFarlane, J. (2014). Positive parenting. In. Nursing Forum, 49(3), 200–208. September, S. J., Rich, E., & Roman, N. (2017). Association between knowledge of child development and parenting: A systematic review. The Open Family Studies Journal, 9(1). Statistics South Africa. (2020). Determinants of health among the youth aged 15–34 years in South Africa. http://www.statssa.gov.za/publications/03-00-15/03-00-152020.pdf Statistics South Africa. (2021). General household survey 2020. http://www.statssa.gov.za/ publications/P0318/P03182020.pdf Steele, E. H., & McKinney, C. (2019). Emerging adult psychological problems and parenting style: Moderation by parent-child relationship quality. Personality and Individual Differences, 146, 201–208. Suárez-Relinque, C., del Moral Arroyo, G., León-Moreno, C., & Callejas Jerónimo, J. E. (2019). Child-to-parent violence: Which parenting style is more protective? A study with Spanish adolescents. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 16(8), 1320. Swartz, S., & Bhana, A. (2009). Teenage tata: Young fathers take responsibility. HSRC Review, 7(3), 4–5. Tapia, M., Alarid, L. F., & Clare, C. (2018). Parenting styles and juvenile delinquency: Exploring gendered relationships. Juvenile and Family Court Journal, 69(2), 21–36. Trading Economics. (2022). South Africa youth unemployment rate. https://tradingeconomics.com/ south-africa/youth-unemployment-rate United Nations. (2020). Shared responsibility, global solidarity: Responding to the socio-economic impacts of COVID-19. https://www.un.org/sites/un2.un.org/files/sg_report_socioeconomic_ impact_of_covid19.pdf van der Mark, E. J., Conradie, I., Dedding, C. W., & Broerse, J. E. (2019). ‘We create our own small world’: Daily realities of mothers of disabled children in a South African urban settlement. Disability & Society, 34(1), 95–120. van der Wal, E. (2018). Killing Rhodes: Decolonization and memorial practices in post-apartheid South Africa. Folk Life, 56(2), 130–146. Yang, J., & Zhao, X. (2020). Parenting styles and children’s academic performance: Evidence from middle schools in China. Children and Youth Services Review, 113, 105017.

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N. V. Roman and F. Benjamin

Nicolette V. Roman, PhD, is a South African Research Chair in the Development of Human Capabilities and Social Cohesion through the Family, the PI in Early Childhood Development (UWC), an Established Researcher in the Centre for Interdisciplinary Studies of Children, Families and Society (CISCFS), at the University of the Western Cape (UWC). She is the founder of CISCFS. Professor is appointed as a Visiting Professor at the University of Huddersfield (UK). Her research focuses on family life, strengthening capable families through the family-parent-child relationship across the lifespan ultimately achieving family and social cohesion. She has published extensively locally and internationally. She currently leads a COVID-19 project exploring Family Life during COVID-19 and has co-authored Chapter 8 of the Country Report on Covid-19 focusing on Civil Society. Fatiema Benjamin is a Research Psychologist and PhD candidate in the Centre for Interdisciplinary Studies of Children, Families and Society (UWC) who is working to develop a tool to screen for anxiety in early childhood. Ms Benjamin has worked on and managed various research projects focusing on the family; the health and well-being of children; exploring human capabilities; Trafficking in Persons (TIP) in Cape Town. Her research interests include early childhood development, mental health in children, socio-emotional development and parenting. She has worked on various manuscripts that focuses on mental health services, parenting experiences, and early childhood development and health.

Parenting and Parent-Child Relationships in Chile Kevin Ray Bush, Ally Laila Murphy, and Gary W. Peterson

The purpose of this chapter is to review scholarly literature and theory related to parenting and parent-child/adolescent relationships in Chile. Consistent with most other societies, families play an important role in Chilean society, a fundamental aspect of which is the parent-child relationship. Strong family bonds are not unique to Chile but play a vital role in the socialization of the young and as protective factors throughout the life span. Consequently, this chapter begins with a brief overview of the country itself and then an introductory description of Chilean society and family life. This is followed by an overview of parenting and parent-child relationships in Chile based on previous studies.

Chile Chile is a country that is fairly easy to recognize on maps because of its unique shape, location, and size. Stretching approximately 2600 miles along the Pacific Ocean across 38 degrees of latitude from its northern borders with Peru to its southern borders with Argentina, Chile is the longest north to south trending country in the world (Central Intelligence Agency, 2021). With the average width of the K. R. Bush (✉) Educational Psychology, Family Science and Social Work, Miami University, Oxford, OH, USA e-mail: [email protected] A. L. Murphy Education and Society, Miami University, Hamilton, OH, USA e-mail: [email protected] G. W. Peterson Family Science and Social Work, Miami University, Oxford, OH, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_3

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country being just 110 miles (177 km) and the widest being 250 miles (400 km), the ocean and mountains always seem within reach. The World Factbook from the U.S. Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) estimates the July 2021 population of Chile to be over 18 million people, with almost 90% of the population living in urban areas (Population Reference Bureau, 2022). Prior to colonialization by the Spanish in the sixteenth century, the indigenous Inca and Mapuche ruled and inhabited present-day Chile. Independence from Spain was gained in 1810, with a series of elected governments prior to a 1973 military coup which took power until a democratic government and president was elected in 1990. The majority of the population speaks Spanish, which is the official language, although Mapudungun, German and English are also spoken. Based on 2012 data, over 85% of inhabitants are of Christian faith, with the majority (67%) being Roman Catholic (Central Intelligence Agency, 2022) (Fig. 1).

Chilean Society and Family Similar to other developing nations, Chilean society has experienced numerous changes in the last several decades. Since the establishment of democracy in 1990, Chile has experienced substantial alterations in governmental practice and social policies that impact families along with influences from globalization (e.g., media from the United States and other nations) and increased urbanization. During these changing times, the Chilean family has undergone significant changes, including declining marriage rates and births to married couples, while age at marriage, cohabitation rates, and births outside of marriage have all increased (Salinas, 2011; Torche & Abufhele, 2021). Many of these trends started in the 1960s, and in recent years cohabitation has become the main form of domestic union in Chile as cohabitation has continued to rise as marriage rates have continued to decline (Ramm & Salinas, 2019). That is, of all women in domestic unions (i.e., both marriage and cohabitation), almost 53% were in cohabiting relationships in 2017. Moreover, this pattern is more prevalent among younger cohorts (ages 20–29) of whom 75% of unions were cohabitating relationships; compared to only 43.5% of unions being cohabitation among those aged 30–45 (Ramm & Salinas, 2019). Most parents in all cultures desire to foster positive outcomes in their children and go about doing this by setting expectations that are consistent with normative behavioral and value standards within their socio-cultural context (Bloom, 1990; Bush & James, 2020; Cote & Bornstein, 2021). Parents in different cultures may face distinctive life conditions and thus have values and priorities that are somewhat unique and reflect these particular circumstances. Parents’ general values and priorities, in turn, influence parental goals, expectations, and related behaviors that are components of the socialization process (Bush & James, 2020; Cote & Bornstein, 2021; Peterson & Bush, 2012). One commonality across most cultures is that parents are primarily responsible for socializing children to meet culturally acceptable norms for behavior. In Chile, socially acceptable norms for behavior have drastically

Parenting and Parent-Child Relationships in Chile Fig. 1 Map of Chile

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changed over recent decades as society has adjusted from that of a military dictatorship to a democratically elected government (Martinez et al., 2006). As a consequence, contemporary Chileans increasingly appear to resist the authoritarian control that was common throughout society under military rule and affirm more democratic values (Darling et al., 2008). An important result is that social norms within many arenas of interpersonal relationships, including parent-child relationships, are readjusting in like fashion to be consistent with broader social convictions. Although the society remains highly family oriented, individualistic values are on the rise, and social and sexual norms have become more liberal, especially among younger cohorts (Martinez et al., 2006). Beyond the political changes experienced by Chilean society, other general beliefs and value systems, such as those associated with individualism and collectivism, have become surprisingly different from what one might expect in a South American country. Individualism and collectivism are useful constructs for conceptualizing differences and similarities across cultures. Collectivism refers to cultural influences that lead individuals to emphasize the values and goals of the group (family, community, etc.) over the values and goals of individuals (Triandis, 1995). As a result, parents whose values and beliefs are based on collectivism are more likely to emphasize conformity, obedience, and group values in their childrearing approach. In contrast, parents who identify with individualism are more likely to emphasize granting age-appropriate autonomy and independence to their offspring. Complicating things even more is the idea that individualism and collectivism are not mutually exclusive in the sense that the increased presence of one does not entail that the other become less evident or influential (Bush & James, 2000; Peterson & Bush, 2012). Moreover, with the expanding reality of globalization, it is becoming more likely that parents in traditionally collectivistic cultures might increasingly adhere to some tenets of individualism and vice versa (Bush, 2000; Bush & James, 2000; Ingoldsby et al., 2003). Illustrative of this is a notable meta-analytic study by Oyserman et al. (2002), who note that several countries with a Latino culture (Argentina, Chile, Colombia, and Puerto Rico) scored higher on measures of individualism and lower on collectivism than did European Americans, who are typically considered to be one of the most individualistic groups. However, both systems of values were prevalent within both the European American and Chilean samples. The results from a recent study by Benavides and Hur (2020) support this earlier finding, as Chilean adults scored higher on independent compared to interdependent self-construal. Recently, scholars have proposed that Chile’s changing political and societal circumstances have impacted socialization through increased underscoring of democratic or autonomy-granting values and decreased emphasis on authoritarian or autocratic values (Martinez et al., 2006). These findings suggest the importance of considering the influence of both individualism and collectivism as co-existing value and belief systems within Chile.

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Parenting Turning to more specific issues about parenting children in Chile, an examination of the literature on parenting and parent-child relationships reveals a sizable growth of in-depth studies since the last version of this chapter a decade ago. Previous assessments of earlier studies examining socialization in Chile revealed few in-depth studies (Darling et al., 2007; Ho et al., 2013). Many earlier studies utilized single global assessments of family relationships, parent-child relationships, or single item measures to assess specific aspects of parenting such as support or monitoring/knowledge. However, in the past decade or so, a sizeable proportion of studies have applied family functioning concepts, previously researched parenting constructs, and empirically established instruments to samples of Chilean families.

Parental Support/Responsiveness Parental supportive practices refer to the extent to which parents are responsive and convey warmth, acceptance, confidence, affection, nurturance, companionship, and love to their offspring. Parents convey supportive meanings to the young using both verbal and nonverbal communications. Findings from studies of other Latino groups suggest that children also may perceive supportive meanings in parents’ use of certain forms of firm behavioral control (e.g., the use of reasoning and/or monitoring), provided that a close, trusting relationship exists between child and parent (Bush et al., 2004; Hill et al., 2003). Studies among Chilean samples have found parental support to be positively related to children’s cognitive functioning (Wu et al., 2019; family involvement and parental monitoring (Ho et al., 2013), perceptions of parents having legitimate authority (Darling et al., 2008) and obligation to comply with them (Darling et al., 2008). Similarly, studies have found parental support to serve as a protective factor against numerous undesired child and adolescent behaviors (Ma et al., 2016; Nelson et al., 2019). For example, Ma et al. (2016) found that parental warmth was negatively related to anxiety and depressive symptoms, social problems, attention problems, as well as delinquent and aggressive behaviors of adolescents. Other studies in Chile have found parental support negatively related to aggressive or deviant behaviors (Bares et al., 2011; Nelson et al., 2019), sexual intercourse (Sanchez et al., 2010), attention problems, and rule-breaking behaviors (Bares et al., 2011) adolescent substance abuse (Nelson et al., 2019) and depression (Cumsille et al., 2015).

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Parental Behavioral Control Firm parental socialization or disciplinary practices that are intended to regulate children’s behavior through a consistent and coherent system of predictable rules and consequences are conceptualized as behavioral control (Bush & Peterson, 2012). This follows Maccoby and Martin’s (1983) conceptualization of parenting demandingness and what Hoffman (1983) refers to as rational power assertion, which involves the use of reasoning or induction in a firm manner to influence child outcomes that are components of social competence. The system’s consistency and fairness help to foster positive parent-child relationships, trust, and open communication (Bush & Peterson, 2012). Parenting practices in this category include reasoning/induction, monitoring, clearly communicated expectations, enforced rules, and consistent discipline. Among these different aspects of firm control, parental monitoring and/or knowledge is the most prevalent dimension in Chilean families and parent-child relations studies. Parental monitoring refers to a type of firm control attempts through which parents track the activities and behaviors of their young, with the purpose being to increase their knowledge about and influence the everyday and long-term developmental outcomes of children that prevent problem behavior. Monitoring involves asking about or regulating where their children are, who they are with, and what they are doing. Monitoring increases parental knowledge and allows parents to understand the contexts in which their children exist and then implies that parents will adjust their socialization/disciplinary strategies accordingly (Bares et al., 2015; Darling et al., 2008; Patterson & Stouthamer-Loeber, 1984). It also has been proposed that monitoring may convey care and concern to children and adolescents when parents are perceived as supervising the young to ensure their welfare (Hill et al., 2003). Based on data from the Global School-Based Student Health Survey (GSBSHS) in Chile, a majority of children and adolescents report that their parents are knowledgeable about their behavior, which may acknowledge both their parents’ supervisory role and the trust they have in their parents’ appropriate judgment to do so. More specifically, across four representative samples from different areas/regions in Chile, between 70% and 73% of youth agreed with the statement that their parents “really know what you were doing with your free time” (Rudatsukira et al., 2008; World Health Organization, 2012). A downside of this study was that the measurement of monitoring/knowledge and parenting behavior was assessed with only single-item measures that assessed parents’ monitoring in general rather than in reference to each parent and specific area of the child’s activity. This particular study also examined monitoring of homework by parents (61–65% endorsed). Although such methodological limitations are important to identify, the consistency of results across four different regions/samples is encouraging. Among Chilean children and/or adolescents, parental monitoring/knowledge has been found to be positively related to global self-esteem (Bush et al., 2016), selfefficacy (Ingoldsby et al., 2003), conformity to parental expectations (Darling et al., 2007; Darling et al., 2008), school achievement orientation (Ingoldsby et al., 2003),

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legitimate parental authority (Darling et al., 2008), and connectedness with mothers, fathers, peers, and school (McWhirter & McWhirter, 2011). Similarly, parental monitoring has been found to be negatively associated with adolescent cigarette use (Bares et al., 2015), aggressive behaviors (Bares et al., 2011; Rudatsukira et al., 2008), sexual intercourse (Sanchez et al., 2010), rule-breaking (Bares et al., 2011), and externalizing behaviors (Han et al., 2012).

Parental Psychological Control Parenting practices that are characterized as excessive, arbitrary, coercive, and inhibiting children’s development of psychological autonomy fall into the category of parental psychological control attempts (Barber et al., 2012; Bush & Peterson, 2012; Peterson, 2005). Parental practices in this category are conceptualized as being both covert and indirect, as well as overt through the use of unqualified power assertion (Hoffman, 1983). This combination of two quite different kinds of arbitrary control has fostered a debate as to whether a single concept adequately represents both dimensions or whether separate constructs are needed (Bush & Peterson, 2012; Peterson, 2005). When considered in combination, these practices enforce a rigid hierarchy in the family as parents demand prompt compliance without the use of reason, explanation or discussion, and focus on the manipulation of the child’s emotional experiences (Baumrind et al., 2010). In other words, psychological control consists of two distinct dimensions, (1) punitiveness or unqualified power assertion and (2) intrusive forms of psychological control (cf. Bush & Peterson, 2012). Punitiveness is the type of psychological control that involves the use of verbal or nonverbal strategies in which unqualified power assertion is used to impose parental authority overtly. Intrusiveness, the second form of psychological control, is where parents impose their authority overtly or covertly through manipulation of the children’s emotions to foster dependency and interfere with progress toward autonomy (Bush & Peterson, 2012; Peterson, 2005).

Punitiveness Parents’ use of unqualified power assertion or coercive control attempts (verbal or physical) refers to punitiveness, which is commonly conceptualized as the featured behavior of authoritarian parenting (Baumrind, 1978). That is, parents impose arbitrary authority to demand children’s compliance (Bush & Peterson, 2012; Peterson & Rollins, 1987). Physical discipline is often a component of punitiveness and evidence from previous research indicates that the use of physical punishment with children has been a component of traditional, Chilean, child-rearing practices (Cova et al., 2020; UNICEF, 2015; Vargas et al., 1995; Williamson, 1972). However, recent public discourse in Chile, reflects less favorable attitudes toward

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physical punishment, perhaps related to policies and campaigns in recent decades that are intended to decrease child abuse and domestic violence (Cova et al., 2020; Vargas et al., 1995). In a recent evaluation of a parent training program focused on strengthening positive parenting practices in Chile, Cova et al. (2020) found that the program successfully decreased child behavior problems by decreasing harsh parenting and physical punishment. The authors identified harsh parental discipline and physical punishment (as well as inconsistent discipline) as mediators in this process. Errázuriz et al. (2016) conducted a qualitative study examining the implementation of the Triple P Parenting Program within a Chilean sample of parent participants. The authors concluded that parents saw their participation as helping to improve their parenting, decrease parental stress, increase communication between parents, and improve children’s behavior and parent-child relationships (Errázuriz et al., 2016). Regarding improving their parenting, one parent stated: “So I would lose control and now I try to control the situation, to control myself, and I know what I can do with these tools that I can apply in certain situations to actually try to guide him...“(Errázuriz et al., 2016, p. 3444). One parent described how the program helped to improve his relationship with his child: “As his father, I have discovered that he could reason and have conversations . . . such as that he comes to me and I to him and we’re talking, and I didn’t think we could have a conversation. . .” (Errázuriz et al., 2016, p. 3444). The authors of both of these parenting program evaluations encourage the implementation of these programs among Chilean families (Cova et al., 2020; Errázuriz et al., 2016). In a study conducted in the mid 1990s, Vargas et al. (1995) found that 80% of sampled Chilean parents, whose fourth to eighth grade children attended public school, indicated that they used physical punishment, while only 57% of parents, whose children attended a private Catholic school, also acknowledged the use of physical punishment. Vargas and colleagues also surveyed school children (seventh and eighth graders) in these same schools and found congruence, with 87% of the children in the public schools reporting being physically punished, while only 54% of children in the private school reported being exposed to physical punishment by their parents. Despite these findings, 34% of parents of children attending the public schools and 52% of parents with children in the private school indicated that physical punishment should never be used. A decade or so later, Runyan et al. (2010) used a modified version of the ParentChild Conflict Tactics Scale to assess parental discipline across six countries, including Chile. The authors reported that, of the sampled Chilean mothers, 37% of mothers used harsh verbal discipline, 69% used moderate physical discipline, 25% used harsh physical discipline, while only 4.5% used harsh physical discipline that included hitting with an object. Based on these recent data by Runyan and colleagues, using a random cluster sampling strategy within the Chilean community of Santa Rosa, harsh physical discipline was not found to be quite as prevalent as that reported in previous decades. The credibility of these findings was reinforced by the in-depth and psychometrically sound instruments and clearly specified definitions used by Runyan et al. (2010).

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Studies examining the impact of parental punitiveness within Chilean samples have increased in the literature over the past decade since the previous version of this chapter was written. One recent study examined maternal punitiveness longitudinally and reported that mothers “hostile parenting” served as a positive predictor of deviant behaviors among Chilean adolescents (Nelson et al., 2019). Similarly, Ho et al. (2013) reported that “harsh parenting” was positively correlated with adolescents’ externalizing behaviors. Ma et al. (2016) found that parental corporal punishment was positively related to several negative youth outcomes, including thought problems, delinquent behaviors, and aggressive behaviors.

Intrusiveness The second component of parental psychological control is intrusiveness, which focuses on the emotional manipulation of children’s dependency on parents rather than parents’ using arbitrary force to demand children’s compliance (Bush & Peterson, 2012). Parental intrusive practices include love withdrawal and guilt induction, or the featured behaviors of intrusive or overprotective parenting (Holmbeck et al., 2002; Levy, 1943; Parker, 1983; Peterson et al., 1999; Peterson & Hann, 1999; Peterson & Rollins, 1987; Schaefer, 1959, 1965). Love withdrawal refers to the efforts of parents to control the young by either threatening to or actually denying love (Peterson & Hann, 1999; Holmbeck et al., 2002; Peterson & Rollins, 1987). Guilt induction refers to parents’ efforts to blame and disgrace to foster dependency, such as turning one’s back or refusing to speak to the young in effort to induce feelings of culpability as a means of influencing children’s behavior (Peterson et al., 1985). Only a handful of studies among Chilean samples could be found that examined parental intrusiveness, and all of them were focused on broader constructs related to psychological control that also included items assessing guilt induction and or love withdrawal. One recent study in Chile reported that “maternal disrespect” (an aspect of intrusive psychological control) was related to adolescent depression (Cumsille et al., 2015). Similarly, Bush et al. (2016) found that a measure of parental psychological control that assessed guilt induction, love withdrawal and punitiveness together, served as a negative predictor of adolescents’ global self-esteem. Using the same data and instruments, Ingoldsby et al. (2003) reported that punitiveness served as a negative predictor of Chilean adolescents’ academic achievement and self-efficacy.

Parent-Child Relationships An important aspect of parent-child relationships is the attachment relationship system which may have significant implications for children’s subsequent relationships and individual development. Children with parents/caregivers who are

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responsive to them are more likely to develop secure attachments and also are provided a secure base from which they can explore the larger social environment at increasingly greater distances from their parents (Ainsworth, 1989; Ainsworth & Bowlby, 1991; Bowlby, 1969, 1988). In contrast, children whose parents/caregivers are overly protective or unresponsive develop insecure attachments. Recent scholarship suggests that both secure and insecure attachment types that form initially during infancy may increasingly affect the quality of intimate relationships and individual outcomes at later stages of the life course. Early attachment relationships may function as internal working models or early relationship templates that may provide the young with some predisposition toward either positive or negative patterns in future relationships (Bowlby, 1969, 1988). Bowlby also originally proposed that the attachment relationship system was universal, applying across gender, culture, and other contexts. Although some evidence supports this universal assumption, there is also evidence to the contrary, especially in regards to gender and SES. In a study by Pierrehumbert et al. (2009), for example, attachment systems for preschool children and caregivers across five countries were examined (Belgium, Chile, Italy, Spain, and Switzerland), with gender differences reported in children’s expressions of emotions related to attachment experiences. Interestingly, the two Latino cultures (Chile and Spain) demonstrated the greatest magnitude of gender differences (i.e., statistically significant differences in effect sizes) compared to the other three countries. Bowlby and other developmentalists have posited that universal parenting characteristics and behaviors, such as maternal sensitivity, are predictors of positive attachment, though the specific strategies through which maternal sensitivity is conveyed may vary across cultures. A study by Valenzuela (1997), for example, provided evidence that although more responsive Chilean mothers tended to have securely attached infants, there was no association found between maternal sensitivity and child behavior during play interactions at home. Such a finding is likely due to cultural or SES factors, which predispose mothers to be less likely to use play as strategies for fostering secure attachment (Valenzuela, 1997). Thus, the cultural context is likely to influence specific facilitative behaviors representative of secure attachment. Overall, the current findings regarding attachment relationships in Chile have been similar to those reported in other countries, with secure attachment being related to positive parenting, positive relationship quality, and prosocial child outcomes. Insecure attachment, in contrast, has been found to predict negative individual psychosocial qualities and problematic relationship outcomes. Secure attachment has been reported, for example, to be positively related to adolescent self-esteem (Bravo & Tapia, 2006), warm parental bonding, and family cohesion among college students in Chile, Spain, and Mexico (Páez et al., 2006). Similarly, Chilean children’s insecure attachment has been found to be related to child maltreatment (Fresno & Spencer, 2011), depression among teens (Bravo & Tapia, 2006), child malnourishment (Valenzuela, 1990; Waters & Valenzuela, 1999), and maternal psychopathology (Quezada & Santelices, 2010). Research in Chile from Araneda et al. (2010) suggests that the prenatal socioemotional context may have important consequences for future attachment relationships and child and maternal outcomes.

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Parent-Adolescent Relationships As children age, the importance of balancing age-appropriate levels of autonomy with connectedness within family relationships continues. This balance of autonomy and connectedness is important across cultures, but the processes leading to this balance and what actually constitutes a balance are likely to vary (Bush & James, 2000; Bush & Peterson, 2012; Peterson & Bush, 2012). Research by Darling et al. (2005), for example, examined autonomy in samples of Chilean and Filipino adolescents, with comparisons revealing that Chilean parents were less likely than Filipino parents to use rules to assert their authority. Chilean teens also were less likely to feel obligated to follow rules established by their parents who had affirmed the need for rules as a means to assert their authority. This contrasts with Filipino teens who were more likely to feel obligated to follow their parents’ rules to assert their authority. Some observers have concluded, therefore, that Chilean parents are uncomfortable with rule enforcement that is consistent with authoritarian control as contemporary Chilean society adjusts from being a military dictatorship to a democracy (Darling et al., 2008). A key dimension of the parent-adolescent relationship, autonomy granting by parents, has been found to foster positive adolescent outcomes (Peterson & Bush, 2012). For example, Bush et al. (2016) reported that Chilean adolescents’ perceptions of parental autonomy granting were positively correlated with adolescent selfesteem. A key point here is that as children age and strive for autonomy, optimum development does not result when children are simply given freedom without continued guidance. That is, autonomy should develop gradually within the context of close and connected parent-child relationships. As parents and older children negotiate autonomy, especially during adolescence, conflict is inevitable, but not necessarily negative. That is, conflict may merely signal the need for changes to occur in the parent-adolescent relationship, and perhaps a greater need for more negotiation that leads to self-directed behavior by adolescents within the context of continuing connections (Bush & Peterson, 2012). Cumsille et al. (2010) conducted a study examining the patterning of Chilean adolescent’s decisions regarding six areas of parent-adolescent disagreement. The authors found five distinct patterns of teen’s disclosure strategies, the first of which is teens “tell all” pattern, in which adolescents disclose everything to parents related to the particular area of concern. A “tell all” pattern had the highest levels of obedience to parents, beliefs that their parents had legitimate authority, and agreement with their parents. Similarly, adolescents in the “tell all” pattern also reported the highest level of maternal warmth and maternal knowledge, but the lowest levels of problem behaviors. Although norms of communication and parent-child authority likely vary across cultures, Cumsille et al. (2010) identify the important role of parentadolescent relationships in fostering positive adolescent outcomes within a diverse sample of Chilean families. That is, positive parenting (warmth, monitoring/knowledge, age-appropriate autonomy granting) is related to positive adolescent

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communication and adolescent outcomes (self-esteem, academic achievement) that are components of social competence. Preliminary cross-cultural research has found that, in comparison to teens in the United States, Chilean teens report lower levels of agreement with parents, but are more likely to fully disclose to parents and are less likely either to avoid the issue or only partially disclose (Darling et al., 2009).

Conclusion A review of existing scholarship has provided evidence that parenting and parentchild relationships in Chile are influenced by two general value systems referred to as individualism and collectivism. Most all of the key parenting practices identified in the literature were found to be prevalent in Chile and related to outcomes in theoretically predictable ways. More specifically, parental supportiveness or responsiveness appears to be a key parenting practice that facilitates positive child and adolescent outcomes that compose social competence (Peterson & Bush, 2012). Parental behavioral control also is used frequently by Chilean parents and serves to foster developmental outcomes indicative of social competence (Peterson & Bush, 2012). Although several studies have examined parental psychological control within Chilean samples, most focused on the prevalence of the physical punishment aspect of punitiveness, but few have examined relationships between dimensions of psychological control and children and adolescent outcomes. The few studies in this area do appear to suggest that the use of physical punishment by parents has decreased in frequency during recent decades. A second dimension of psychological control, parental intrusiveness, could only be identified in three studies. This may reflect the broader social-political changes that have occurred in Chile which may, in turn, have led to reductions in authoritarian or intrusive control strategies by parents with their young. For the most part, patterns of attachment and autonomy development seem to follow general patterns commonly found in the United States and other Western societies. An illustration of such a similarity is the importance placed on autonomy development by Chilean adolescents who desire to achieve autonomy sooner than their parents are ready to accept this desire (Darling et al., 2005; Darling et al., 2007). In contrast, some differences or unique patterns also have appeared when Chilean parent-adolescent relationships are compared with those from other cultures. Chilean teens seem to disagree more with their parents on a variety of issues compared to U.S. samples, but also were more likely to communicate openly with their mothers and fathers about a variety of issues (Darling et al., 2009). Such parent-adolescent relationship practices (autonomy granting and open communication) are consistent with the common preoccupation of youth with greater autonomy and seem consistent with the growth of individualism in Chile and with the corresponding resistance to authoritarian control. All these patterns seem consistent with the manner that individualism has had consequences on socialization practices throughout the world and perhaps is a result of globalization.

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Although some methodological problems exist in the current Chilean research on parent-child relations (as they do within research on other countries), with some studies focusing only on sampling mothers as well as the use of measuring variables with overly generalized single item measures, there was a big improvement in this area over the past decade. Consequently, future parent-child research should continue to assess both the mothers and fathers and measurements of constructs should be conducted with empirically developed multiple item measures having demonstrated reliability and validity. Social norms related to father’s roles in Chile also appear ambiguous, are changing rapidly, and differ across generations. Illustrative of this is a study from the early 1970s which found that while 40% of households in the sample were described as father dominate for making decisions, almost 38% were seen as using practices where parents share more equally in making decisions (Williamson, 1972). In the twenty-first century, despite the persistence of traditional patriarchal gender roles, younger working-class men are finding themselves being expected to negotiate with their spouses/partners and participate more in childcare and housework (Olavarría, 2003). Some observers have commented that this transition has not been easy because more egalitarian fathering contradicts generations of male socialization for patriarchal roles. As a result of such historical patterns, accomplished models for more active father involvement have been quite scarce. Thus fathers who have chosen to become more involved and take an active role in childrearing may not feel that they are being good fathers, especially if it takes away from their ability to provide for their family (Olavarría, 2003). A recent study by Sabat et al. (2021) examined the role of fathers’ parenting style among families of children with intellectual disabilities in Chile. The authors found that although both maternal and paternal parenting styles were positively related to children’s adaptive behaviors, fathers’ authoritative parenting contributed to children’s adaptive behavior above and beyond the contributions of mothers (Sabat et al., 2021). This finding underscores the importance of conducting more research on the role of fathering in Chile. An overall assessment is that some solid and meaningful work has been accomplished, but a need now exists for even more high-quality research on parenting and parent-child/adolescent relationships in Chile. Future parent-child research should focus on greater conceptual clarity, frequent cross-cultural comparisons, equal sampling of mothers and fathers (Sabat et al., 2021), and the development/validation and implementation of psychometrically sound measurement instruments.

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Kevin Ray Bush is a Professor in the departments of Educational Psychology and Family Science and Social Work, and Co-Director of the Doris Bergen Center for Human Development, Learning and Technology at Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. His research focuses on child and adolescent development in contexts (e.g., family, school, community, culture); and program evaluation. He has conducted studies with diverse US (Appalachian, African American, Asian American and Latinos) and international (e.g., Chinese, Chilean, Mexican, South Korean, and Russian) samples of children, adolescents and parents. Dr. Bush earned his PhD in Human Ecology from The Ohio State University in 2000. Ally Laila Murphy is an Assistant Professor in the Department of Education and Society and affiliated with the Department of Family Science and Social Work at Miami University of Ohio. Dr. Murphy earned her Ph.D. and M.Sc. in Human Development and Family Studies from Iowa State University. She also has a Bachelor’s degree in Child and Family Psychology. Her research focuses on developmental psychology (particularly cognitive development), trauma informed care and education, families at-risk (e.g., single-parent families, incarceration and families, etc.), resiliency, family structure and function, and sexuality.

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Gary W. Peterson is Professor Emeritus of Family Science and Social Work at the University of Miami in Oxford, Ohio. His scholarship focuses on parent-child/adolescent relations, cross-cultural influences on adolescent development, and family theory. His publications have appeared in numerous academic journals and edited book chapters. He is editor or co-editor of numerous books in these areas, including serving as the Senior Editor of the Handbook of Marriage and the Family (3rd Ed.). Dr. Peterson is a Fellow of the National Council on Family Relations and a previous Editor of the journal Marriage and Family Review.

Understanding Childhood Shyness in the Changing Chinese Context: The Parent Perspective Yiyuan Xu and Da Eun Suh

From the break-up of the former socialist countries in Central-Eastern Europe to the dissolution of the Soviet Union, from the Cold War to sweeping globalization, from the rapid-growing Four Asian Dragons of Hong Kong, Singapore, South Korea, and Taiwan to the massive economic reform of Mainland China, the world is changing and changing fast. Such dramatic social, political, and economic changes are often accompanied by radical transitions at cultural, societal, institutional, and individual levels. The impact of these changes is particularly appealing to developmental psychologists who have always been interested in connecting contextual variations and chronological changes to social and psychological experiences and functioning of individuals (Bronfenbrenner, 1995; Elder, 1998). The current chapter will focus on parents’ views of childrearing in general, with a particular focus on their perspectives related to childhood shyness, in the context of fast-changing Mainland China. We will first introduce theoretical frameworks that can be used to understand the impact of societal changes on individual and family functioning. Then we will discuss recent changes in Chinese parents’ childrearing beliefs and practices, in comparison to traditional and stereotypical Chinese parenting. Next, we will draw from our recent research to demonstrate how society-wide contextual changes might be reflected in cohort differences in parents’ education, value orientation toward independent and interdependent self-construals, and their conception, normative beliefs, and childrearing practices related to shyness, highlighting the importance of conceptualizing shyness as a multidimensional construct with varying forms. Finally, we will discuss the limitations of current research and point out future directions that could extend our understanding of parents’ adaption to changing contexts.

Y. Xu (*) · D. E. Suh Department of Psychology, University of Hawaiʻi at Mānoa, Honolulu, HI, USA e-mail: [email protected]; [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_4

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Understanding Individual and Family Adapting in Changing Societies: Theoretical Frameworks Bronfenbrenner In his famous bioecological theory (1994, 1998), development is viewed as a function of not only characteristics of the developing person, but also immediate (micro-) and more remote environmental (macro-) contexts, as well as the time periods during which the development occurs. Macro-level contexts are dynamic and evolving in relation to macrotime (historical time), which is manifested in significant events and changing expectations in the larger society, both within and across cohorts or generations. The impact of macro-level contextual changes is expected to cascade down to family and individual adaption (i.e., proximal processes), partly via the mediation of changing values, beliefs, and attitudes, that are often shared among most members of the same cohort or generation in a culture. Thus, to understand how families adapt to changing societies, it is important to understand how parents of different cohorts or generations adjust their childrearing beliefs and attitudes in accordance with macro-level contextual changes. Elder Elder’s life course theory (1998) emphasizes the mismatch between new demands brought about by societal change and established life practices, and the resulting construction of alternative life courses, or new ways of adaptation (Silbereisen & Tomasik, 2008). In Elder’s theory, macro-level contextual changes are often associated with significant historical time periods or events such as the Great Depression, and most saliently reflected in change in family socioeconomic situations. Thus, individuals’ life courses alter as they experience and cope with unique life transitions, challenges, and opportunities related to family socioeconomic circumstances during a particular historical time (Elder & Shanahan, 2006). In this case, differences in family and individual adaption such as changes in childrearing beliefs and practices before and after the significant historical event are likely related to changes in family socioeconomic circumstances associated with this historical event. LeVine Unlike Bronfenbrenner and Elder’s theories, LeVine’s model focuses specifically on changing parental goals that might be related to changing contextual demands. LeVine (1980, 1988) proposed that all human parents share the universal goals of survival, health, acquisition of economic capabilities, and the attainment of cultural values for their children. These goals form a rough hierarchical sequence in the course of development. That is, most parents ought to first meet the more fundamental goals, such as survival and health of their children, before adapting their child rearing strategies to cultivate culturally defined virtues. Parenting practices represent compromised formulas designed for the accomplishment of multiple and hierarchically organized goals in a particular cultural context. When the environmental conditions are relatively stable and resemble those of the past, the common sense formulas for child rearing typically facilitate the welfare of children. However, when the ecological context, which is mediated by historical and societywide changes, shifts in contextual demands and accordingly prevailing values and

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beliefs, parents are expected to experience varying life stressors and social support that prompt them to make changes in their childrearing goals (LeVine, 1988; Xu, et al., 2005, 2014). Rather than blindly following traditional cultural scripts of childrearing, parents often adjust their attitudes and behaviors, sometimes unconsciously, to risks or benefits in changing aspects of the ecological contexts that threaten or facilitate the attainment of their childrearing goals. Over time, the adjustment made by parents in their childrearing helps redefine the common sense formulas in their cultural communities as an adaptive practice rather than arbitrary tradition (LeVine, 1988). Taken together, all three theories emphasize the critical roles macro-level contextual changes may play in the family and individual adaptation. While Elder’s theory is mostly about understanding life course changes across cohorts or generations in relation to historical events as mediated by change in socioeconomic circumstances, Bronfenbrenner’s and LeVine’s theories highlight how dynamic macro-level contextual changes may shape varying intervening processes (e.g., shared values and beliefs, or hierarchical parental goals) related to family and individual functioning. Extending these theories to parents’ adaption to the changing Chinese society requires an understanding of (1) macro-level contextual changes in Mainland China and the likely consequences on intervening processes related to evolving family socioeconomic circumstances, shared values and beliefs, and childrearing goals; and (2) how cohort or generational differences in these intervening processes may be associated with changes in parents’ cognition, attitudes, and behavior in Mainland China.

From Tiger Parents to Child-Centered Parenting? Parents’ Beliefs and Practices in the Changing Chinese Context Macro-Level Contextual Changes in the Chinese Society Mainland Chinese society has experienced and is still experiencing considerable social and economic changes. The Cultural Revolution in the 1960s had a massive negative impact including deteriorated economy, loss of population, and radical political movement that many believe had a detrimental, if not devastating, influence on the traditional Chinese value system. In contrast, the end of the Cultural Revolution and the implementation of the open-door policy in the 1980s have led to the reform from a command economy to a socialist market economy. These brought about a significant growth of domestic and foreign private enterprises and joint ventures, updated infrastructure, increase as well as variations in education levels and family income, migration of the rural populations to urban cities, and boom in real estate development. However, unlike former socialist countries in Central-East Europe, such massive reform of economy and integration into globalization has not produced significant political reform and societal wide change in values and beliefs toward democracy and freedom of speech, as initially expected by the West.

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The economic reform is also accompanied by significant change in social and educational policies that have had a profound impact on Chinese families and children. For instance, the one-child policy officially introduced in 1978 has resulted in a 4 (grandparents)-2 (parents)-1 (child) family structure in most urban areas, which may have contributed to a child-centered view that consolidates family resources and attention on a single child. However, the trend of decreasing birth rate and its potentially detrimental influences on the labor force and social welfare system have led to the revised two-child limit policy in 2015, and the encouragement of having three or more children in 2021. In the recent effort to spark baby boom, the Chinese government has tried to tame property prices, cracked down the entire private education industry, and closed almost all after-school tutoring services, hoping to reduce the young generation’s anxiety of not being able to afford to have children due to rising housing cost, and fierce competition in educational institutions and the job market. Changing Family Socioeconomic Circumstances Macro-level contextual changes often result in changing intervening processes, among which the change in family socioeconomic circumstances may be particularly salient when radical historical events, such as the open-door policy in China, occur. Specifically, the rapid growth of the economy in Mainland China has led to significant changes in average family income and parents’ education levels, which may in turn influence childrearing beliefs and practices. From 1990 to 2021, the annual per capita disposable income of rural and urban Chinese households (in yuan) has increased from about 1500 and 700 to 47,000 and 19,000, respectively (Textor, 2022), with a large number of urban households now being designated as middle-class (ChinaPower, 2019). At the same time, the investment and rapid growth of higher education institutions, modeled after Western colleges and universities, has resulted in a record number of college graduates in Mainland China. In 2020, around eight million students graduated from undergraduate programs at public colleges and universities in China, in comparison to less than one million college students in the 1980s (Textor, 2021). Accompanying these changes, however, is a widened gap in family income, rising inequality, and decreased social mobility. While some parents are able to send their children to expensive private schools or high schools or colleges in the U.S. and Europe, others struggle to support even the basic needs of their children and begin to question the necessity of having children due to the mounting cost to support them. Changing Values and Beliefs Traditional Chinese society is an agrarian culture in which strict responsibilities are assigned to members for cropping, tending, planting, harvesting, and storing food. Consistent with LeVine’s model (LeVine, 1980), the nature of this large-scale agrarian culture may have given rise to the Chinese emphasis on self as a part of the holistic whole, comprising natural, human, and spiritual entities (Fung, 1983; Zhou, 1990). It has also created the notion that an individual’s behavior should be guided by his/her role responsibilities in the relationship knit of the holistic whole (Nisbett et al., 2001). Confucianism, the dominant value system in traditional Chinese society, applies this holistic view to the five

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moral standards of individual behaviors: ren (benevolence), yi (righteousness), li (propriety), zhi (wisdom), and xin (trustworthiness) (Wang & Zheng, 2004; Wu, 1996). These five standards mutually regulate and direct appropriate social behaviors and relationships. For example, a child needs to behave with li (deference and propriety) toward his/her parents and to fulfill filial piety, while the parents are responsible for training the child to meet the requirements of the five moral standards (Chao, 1994; Ho, 2000). Given the macro-level societal changes mentioned above, it is debatable to what extent contemporary Chinese society remains committed to these traditional values. The destruction of the Chinese traditional value system in the Cultural Revolution and the propaganda of Communist/Socialist collectivism are accompanied by the recent import of Western values that may be instrumental for economic but not necessarily political reform. For instance, while individual autonomy, expression of personal opinions, self-reliance, and confidence are increasingly encouraged (Chen et al., 2021), they are still confined within authoritarian control and tolerated only when they do not challenge the practice of collectivism that connotes conformity to the communist party and ideology. Consequently, sweeping value changes or Westernization have not occurred; rather, there is a mixture of traditional values (e.g., guanxi or relatedness/connectiveness, mianzi or face, and renqing or favor) that remains functional in contemporary Chinese society (Chan, 2006; Wang & Pak, 2015), Communist ideology such as collectivism in the form of patriotism and dedication toward the party and government (Zhao, 1998), and encouragement of independence and autonomy within the limit of not challenging the social hierarchies in the current political system (Chen & Chen, 2010; Liu et al., 2020). From Tiger Parents to Child-Centered Parenting? Corresponding to traditional Chinese values is the stereotype of Tiger Parenting characterized by a portrayal of a strict or controlling style of childrearing (Kim et al., 2013; Lin & Fu, 1990). Many Chinese parents emphasize obedience, and they are expected to train their children to demonstrate dong shi, or an understanding of parents’ desires, in parent-child interactions (Chao & Tseng, 2002; Wu, 1996). In addition, some Chinese parents may engage in shaming, or publicly embarrassing their children, in order to manipulate children’s emotional states and sensitize them to shame and others’ evaluations (Nelson et al., 2006). In contrast, other Chinese parents may encourage their children to be modest, unassuming, and to not place individual accomplishments or interests over group interests (Nelson et al., 2006). Some may use their own experiences or traditional Chinese stories such as “singing birds get shot” to raise children’s awareness of the negative consequences of being too different from others. Others may reinforce children’s humility with an endorsement of their dong shi (an understanding of adults’ desires). Consistent with the diverse parenting practices, more recent evidence suggests that most Chinese families do not endorse harsh parenting or shaming, but instead show parental warmth and encouragement of modesty, reflecting a mixture of parental goals related to both traditional values and beliefs and their adaption to contemporary society (Chao, 1994, 2000; Wang & Chang, 2010; Xu et al., 2005, 2009c, 2014).

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The implementation of the one-child policy, as well as increasing parents’ education levels, may have led to a transition to child-centered parenting in contemporary Chinese society characterized by an emphasis on parental warmth and encouragement of autonomy (Xu et al., 2005). Consistent with this view, Chen and Chen (2010) reported that Chinese parents in their 2002 cohorts reported higher parental warmth and lower power assertion than those in the 1998 cohort. In addition, Chinese mothers in the 2002 cohort reported higher autonomy support than those in the 1998 cohort. Similarly, Chen et al. (2021) showed that when matched in education levels, Chinese mothers in the 2008 cohort were less likely to display involvement in children’s activities and more likely to encourage child autonomy, than their counterparts in the 1995 cohort. One caveat of Chen and Chen (2010)‘s findings is the lack of cohort differences in fathers’ endorsement of autonomy support, suggesting the possibility that parents’ support of autonomy may be constrained by other concerns, such as caution of not crossing lines that would challenge authorities in the established social hierarchy. At the same time, it appears that the implementation of the one-child policy may have given rise to the use of intrusive/overprotective parenting, in which parents pay excessive attention to their children’s often unreasonable demands and nonetheless assert parental dominance on children and limit children’s self-exploration (Xu et al., 2009b). Consequently, children of intrusive/overprotective parents may get stuck in the safety nets and lack the opportunities for learning social skills for successful interaction with peers (Rubin et al., 2002; Hastings et al., 2008). The changing family socioeconomic circumstances and a mixture of traditional, Communist, and Western values and ideologies have also led to significant variations in childrearing and confusion among Chinese parents. Tamis-LeMonda et al. (2008) argued that opposing cultural values such as individualism and collectivism can be conflicting, additive, or functionally dependent, resulting in diverse parental views of developing autonomy or relatedness as interfering or mutually dependent, such that developing relatedness may lead to eventual autonomy or vice versa. However, Tamis-LeMonda et al. (2008) did not differentiate traditional valueoriented collectivism from communist ideology-based collectivism, and how the inherent incompatibility among diverse values and ideologies could lead to tremendous confusion among Chinese parents. For instance, guanxi or relatedness/ connectiveness may take a form of appeasing those in power and is at odds with the value of autonomy. Similarly, encouragement of independence may not be compatible with conforming to collectivism in the form of patriotism and dedication toward the party and government. Accordingly, Chinese parents have to take a more practical approach of navigating among these seemly conflicting values and goals, and many of them may place emphasis on both autonomy and relatedness as two seemingly conflicting yet co-existing childrearing goals in the face of mixed societal values within the changing Chinese society (Chen & Chen, 2010; Chen et al., 2021). Contemporary Chinese society is characterized by state capitalism that combines both market economy and strict state control. One notable consequence of state capitalism is the increasingly important role family socioeconomic circumstances may play in determining parents’ beliefs and goals, childrearing practices, and a

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child’s future. On the one hand, parents with higher socioeconomic statuses could offer more choices to their children within their networks of guanxi and renqin. Specifically, many of them can prepare their children for top local schools or international schools and eventually send them to foreign high schools or colleges, so their children could be educated in a less competitive academic setting. On the other hand, parents with scarce resources and guanxi have limited options; they often have to burden their children with endless homework and a loaded schedule of study after school. As a result, children from these families are often left with limited opportunities to explore personal choices and freely express their opinions since being competitive in academics represents the only way to move up the social ladder. Therefore, a child-centered childrearing approach may take very different form in contemporary Chinese society depending on family socioeconomic circumstances. To some, it is about consolidation of one’s resources and social networks to invest on their children; to others it means family sacrifice and struggles to meet children’s basic needs. Furthermore, those who are better off financially may appear to be more laid back or Westernized, and are able to afford more expensive extracurricular activities rather than focusing only on academic work. In contrast, those who struggle financially are likely to be more stressed and may resemble stereotypical Tiger Parents who would be more likely to push their children to their limits (Feng, 2021). Unfortunately, pin die (all about who your dad is) seems to become increasingly influential in determining a child’s future in contemporary Chinese society.

Understanding Parents’ Perspectives about Childhood Shyness in the Changing Chinese Context Parents’ Conception of Shyness Parental beliefs and childrearing practices are not only influenced by changing socioeconomic circumstances and prevailing cultural values, they are also responses to parents’ own conception of children’s individuality. The way parents form their expectations and rear their children in different cultures and during different historical times cannot be understood apart from their evolving understanding of children’s individual characteristics such as shyness (Bronfenbrenner & Morris, 1998). Shyness has often been viewed as a problem or deficit to overcome in the North American settings (Pilkonis, 1977; Rubin, 1998) and has been linked “. . .with negative qualities that are not inherently related to shyness itself. . .” (Kerr et al., 1996, p. 1100). However, it seems to represent a multidimensional construct that does not necessarily connote negative meanings depending on its subtype in many different cultures (Colonnesi et al., 2020; Xu et al., 2020, 2021). For instance, in a series of studies with Chinese children and teachers, Xu and colleagues (Xu et al., 2007, 2008, 2009a; Xu & Farver, 2009) have shown that Chinese notion of shyness encompasses not only shyness toward strangers, or inhibited behavior accompanied by a fear of novelty or uncertainty in unfamiliar social situations, and anxious shyness that refers to nervousness about real or

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imagined negative feedback or disapproval. There is also regulated shyness that is not accompanied by observable fear or anxiety, but is characterized by non-assertive and unassuming behavior and tends to involve self-consciousness about being a likely target of public attention (Xu et al., 2020). Such differentiation has also received empirical support from other cultural contexts (e.g., Xu et al., 2015; Xu & Krieg, 2014; Özdemir et al., 2015). Furthermore, Xu et al. (2009c, 2014) showed that Chinese parents’ intrusiveness/ overprotectiveness and shaming were associated with children’s anxious shyness, whereas their encouragement of modesty was related to regulated shyness. In a recent qualitative study, Liu et al. (2020) interviewed a group of Chinese mothers regarding their conception, or ethnotheories of shyness in contemporary Chinese society. Specifically, mothers’ ethnotheories of shyness were explored by asking their definitions, causal attributions, and the implications of shyness for children’s development and adaptation in Chinese society. The results showed that Chinese mothers conceptualized the lack of social interactions and communication in public and reticent and socially wary behaviors as defining features of shyness. At the same time, some of the mothers also mentioned attributes such as modesty, attentiveness, and good manners in their ethnotheories of shyness, providing additional evidence in support of Chinese parents’ conception of shyness as a multidimensional construct. Another important finding from Liu et al. (2020) was about Chinese mothers’ attributions of shyness as internally versus externally determined, and as a stable or unstable attribute. Contrary to the popular Western notion of shyness that often emphasizes shyness as a stable trait-like attribute (e.g., personality or temperament), Chinese mothers tended to view shyness as an evolving attribute that is shaped through external causes rather than believing that shy behaviors are intentional and stable. Consequently, they held strong beliefs about parental responsibility in the cultivation of children’s personalities and in helping their shy children develop adaptive behaviors. These results are in line with previous studies that demonstrated cultural emphasis on environmental influence and effort, rather than constitutional traits and ability in Chinese parents’ attribution of achievement and social behavior (Li, 2012; Cheah & Rubin, 2004). They also correspond with the recent finding that in comparison to American children, Chinese children reported stronger incremental theories of shyness that focus on its changing nature over time and across situations (Zhang & Xu, 2019). Thus, Chinese children were less likely to view shyness as a stable and immutable trait, which partly explains why they had better relationships with shy peers than their American counterparts (Zhang & Xu, 2019). Parents’ Perspectives Related to Childhood Shyness in the Changing Chinese Society With a few exceptions (Chen et al., 2005, 2021), most studies that have investigated the impact of changing Chinese society have focused on a single Chinese cohort and thus cannot directly address the key question raised in Bronfenbrenner’s, Elder’s, and LeVine’s theories. That is, how changes in macrolevel contexts over time may be reflected in changing intervening processes such as family socioeconomic circumstances, prevailing cultural values, and childrearing

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goals, which in turn may be related to changes in family and individual adaption. To fill this gap, my colleagues and I have conducted a series of exploratory studies to examine: (1) whether there were cohort differences in parents’ conception of shyness, (2) whether parents of different cohorts varied in their views of different forms of shyness as normative behavior, as well as their childrearing practices that were found to be related to childhood shyness (Xu et al., 2014): intrusive/ overprotective parenting (Rubin et al., 2002; Hastings et al., 2008), shaming (Nelson et al., 2006), and encouragement of modesty (Wu et al., 2002), and. (3) how cohort differences in parents’ education and their value orientations toward independent and interdependent self-construals might help explain the cohort differences in normative beliefs about shyness and parenting practices. To address the first objective, we compared three cohorts of Chinese parents recruited in 2001, 2005, and 2011 using semi-structured interviews. We asked parents to think about a school-age child whom they think is shy and explain why they think this child is shy. These questions were followed by probes designed to clarify parents’ responses (e.g., Tell me what you mean by that) or to clarify the relevance of the answers they gave (e.g., Why would that make you think s/he is very shy?), and ended with questions on children’ age, gender, and whether parents were referring to their own children. We applied the protocol as described in Xu et al. (2008) and identified a list of 23, 27, and 24 shyness descriptors for 2001, 2005, and 2011 cohorts, respectively. Trained research assistants then coded these descriptors based on the definitions of shyness toward strangers (e.g., very cautious when meeting someone for the first time), anxious shyness (e.g., always worrying about saying something wrong), and regulated shyness (e.g., does not like standing out) (Xu et al., 2008, 2020). The descriptors that did not fit with a specific form of shyness were classified as non-specific shyness descriptors (e.g., often quiet). We then examined the number of times each cluster of shyness descriptors was mentioned by the parents and compared the frequencies across the three cohorts. The results showed that regardless of cohort, descriptors of all three forms of shyness, as well as non-specific descriptors were mentioned in parents’ explanations. Non-specific shyness descriptors were mentioned most often in all three cohorts. There was no significant difference in the frequencies of mentioning shyness toward strangers, anxious shyness, and regulated shyness across the three cohorts. Thus, despite the macro-level societal changes, parents’ conception of shyness appeared to be relatively stable, consisting of a wide range of behavioral descriptors corresponding to both non-specific quiet and reserved behavior and specific forms of shyness. Building on this qualitative study, we addressed our second objective by exploring cohort differences in parents’ views of shyness as normative, and their involvement in childrearing practices related to childhood shyness. We developed a measure that asks parents to report their perceived normativeness of each shyness descriptor derived from the first study. To control for social desirability, instead of asking parents about their own views, we asked them whether they thought “most parents I

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know would think it is OK for their children to. . .”, followed by a shyness descriptor (e.g., be quiet, be cautious when meeting someone for the first time), and included descriptors of sociability to balance the content of the measure. Parents’ responses were rated on a 5-point scale (1 = strongly disagree, 5 = strongly agree). We administered this measure to three cohorts of parents (2005, 2011, and 2014 cohorts) and compared their ratings of normativeness on the three forms of shyness, as well as on non-specific quiet and reserved behavior. We also asked parents of the 2011 and 2014 cohorts to report their involvement in intrusive/overprotective parenting, shaming, and encouragement of modesty. The results showed that within each cohort, anxious shyness was consistently considered the most non-normative in comparison to other two forms of shyness, and such a non-normative view of anxious shyness did not differ among the three cohorts. However, there was a decline in perceived normativeness of regulated shyness from the 2005 to 2011 cohort, but an increase in perceived normativeness of shyness toward strangers from the 2011 to 2014 cohort. Interestingly, the most salient increase in perceived normativeness occurred with sociability from 2005 to 2011, then to 2014. Taken together, it seems that similar to most Western findings, anxious shyness was viewed negatively by parents in contemporary Chinese society and such a negative view appears to be relatively stable regardless of parent cohort. In contrast, from 2005 to 2014, parents appeared to increasingly value sociability as normative behavior children should develop. Although both shyness toward strangers and regulated shyness were viewed more positively than anxious shyness, shyness toward strangers appeared to be viewed as more normative for the most recent cohort of Chinese parents whereas the opposite was found for regulated shyness. Regarding parenting practices, there were no cohort differences in their engagement in intrusive/overprotective parenting and encouragement of modesty; however, we found less involvement of shaming among parents of the 2014 cohort than those of the 2011 cohort. To further explore the third objective regarding what intervening processes might help explain the cohort differences in perceived normativeness of shyness/sociability and parenting practices, we compared the 2005, 2011, and 2014 cohorts in parents’ orientations to independent and interdependent self-construal (Markus & Kitayama, 1991) and their education levels. Furthermore, we investigated whether parents’ value orientation and education may mediate the cohort differences found above. Although the 2005, 2011, and 2014 cohorts did not differ in orientation toward interdependent self-construal, there was an increase in independent self-construal from 2005 to 2011, which was in turn related to the decrease in normative beliefs about regulated shyness. Parents’ education levels increased from 2005 to 2011, then to 2014, and these cohort differences in parents’ education levels partly explained the increase in parents’ normative beliefs about sociability. Finally, lower engagement in shaming in the 2014 than 2011 cohort was partly accounted for by higher education levels among parents in the 2014 cohort. In summary, it seems that Chinese parents’ perspectives about shyness are contingent upon its specific form. On the one hand, their multidimensional view of

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shyness and their non-normative beliefs about anxious shyness seem to be similar across three cohorts. On the other hand, more recent cohorts of parents showed more normative beliefs about sociability and engaged in less use of shaming, which may be partly explained by more years of education, presumably leading to stronger child-centered views (Xu et al., 2005, 2014). It may be that there was a stronger impact of the macro-level contextual changes in contemporary Chinese society on parents’ views about sociability than on shyness. In addition, more years of education among parents of more recent cohorts may be partly responsible for a stronger child-centered view and increasing awareness of detrimental effect of shaming in parent-child interaction.

Limitations and Future Directions Despite the emerging evidence that supports the impact of macro-level contextual changes in the Chinese society on individual and family functioning in general, and parents’ adaption related to childhood shyness in particular, there are at least two key limitations of the current research. First, while comparisons among parent cohorts provide stronger evidence than a cross-sectional study of a single cohort, a developmental component is still lacking in such designs, thus limiting researchers to make conclusions based on cohort differences rather than on developmental changes. For instance, despite the lack of cohort differences in parents’ conception of shyness, it is unclear how the same parents may change their views about shyness over time, in response to both their children’s maturation and historical macro-level changes. In this regard, a cohort-sequential design would be a superior choice given its integration of longitudinal components for each individual cohort, so that both time and cohort can be treated as independent variables in the same design. Second, most studies have relied on post-hoc interpretations, rather than directly examining intervening processes that may account for cohort differences. That is, cohort differences in individual and family functioning (e.g., parenting practices related to childhood shyness) are attributed to historical macro-level contextual changes (e.g., economic reform), without actually investigating intervening processes that may be a result of historical changes (e.g., changes in family income and education as related to cohort differences in parenting practices). Understanding such intervening processes would further extend our understanding of parents’ adaption to changing macro-level contexts.

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Yiyuan Xu is currently a Professor of Psychology in the Department of Psychology at University of Hawaiʻi at Mānoa, USA. Da Eun Suh is currently a Ph.D. student in the Department of Psychology at University of Hawaiʻi at Mānoa, USA.

The Ethical Space of Indigenous Parenting Peter Choate and Gabrielle E. Lindstrom

Introduction In this chapter, we explore the notion of cultural genocide in relation to Indigenous parenting. Assimilation has been used to describe the experiences of Indigenous peoples in Canada, a term that tends to cushion the genocidal aims of government. The intention of assimilation efforts in colonized countries such as Canada, New Zealand and Australia was focused upon the elimination of Indigenous peoples so that the colonizing populations would be in control. The colonizers would then have control of the land, its resources and productive values, an overarching goal of settler-colonial nation-states (Wolfe, 2006). The ethical space as envisioned by Cree scholar Willie Ermine (2007), offers a conceptual space to explore genocidal aims in terms of present-day parenting matters particularly in relation to child protection. We conclude by stating that despite efforts to eradicate, Indigenous peoples, their communities and families have persisted which is reflected in the parenting of upcoming generations.

Our Social Location We speak of our social location as we believe that this is important in centering both ourselves and readers relative to the issues being considered.

P. Choate Mount Royal University, Calgary, Canada e-mail: [email protected] G. E. Lindstrom (✉) Taylor Institute, Calgary, Canada e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_5

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Gabrielle Lindstrom, Tsapinaki, is a member of the Kainaiwa Nation which is a part of the Blackfoot Confederacy. Her teaching background includes instructing in topics around First Nation, Métis and Inuit history and current issues, Indigenous Studies (Canadian and International perspectives), Indigenous cross-cultural approaches, and Indigenous research methods and ethics. Peter Choate is a white settler whose family links in this country go back to the movement of United Empire Loyalists from what is now the United States to the east coast of Canada. He grew up on the traditional lands of the Musqueum, Squamish and Tslei-Waututh First Nations. He is a Professor of Social Work at Mount Royal University.

Cultural Genocide In our view, it is impossible to consider how parenting is described, judged and interrogated if the question of cultural genocide is not considered. Starblanket (2018) offers a careful review of the term cultural genocide as a valid expression of colonial behavior. Genocide, as she notes, is often thought of as the physical elimination of a peoples such as was seen in World War II with the Nazi preoccupation with eliminating the Jewish population. Yet, when thought of in more detailed ways, the elimination of culture is an effective means of genocide by removing the essence of how a people can self-define. It is the elimination of cultural practices that create identity within a defined group (Indigenous) and marks that presence as distinct to various ways of knowing and being. Hence, genocide with regard to Indigenous peoples is/was achieved through the destruction of their identity. Legal scholar Kurt Mundorff (2009) defines genocide as “any deliberate act committed with the intention of destroying the language, religion or culture of a . . . group, such as, for example, prohibiting the use of the group’s language or its schools or places of worship” (p. 76). The details of how language and culture were prohibited through violence and humiliation are well documented by the TRC [Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada] (2015) as well as much earlier reports such as the one put forth by Peter Bryce (Green, 2006). According to Raphael Lemkin, who first coined the term genocide, “The destruction of a nation, therefore, results in the loss of its future contribution to the world” (2005, p. 91). The goal of the Indian Residential Schools (IRS) was to seek the advancement of Eurocentric society through the calculated destruction of Indigenous identity and nationhood. Patrick Wolfe, outlining the processes of settler-colonialism, writes that “The question of genocide is never far from discussions of settler-colonialism” and that genocide occurs through a logic elimination – “settler colonialism destroys to replace” (p. 387) The genocide of Indigenous peoples in Canada can be understood as the convergence of settler-colonial forces that are both historical and contemporary. From a historical vantage point, the paternalistic nature of Indian policy has been presented as encompassing goals of protection, civilization, and assimilation (Buckley, 1993; Hildebrandt et al., 1996; Milloy, 1999). This is a misconstrued

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benevolence of “protection” from Euro-settler violence motivated by definitions that dehumanized Indigenous peoples and rendered them as uncivilized and actualized through genocidal legislation cloaked in efforts to assimilate. Sir John A. Macdonald, Canada’s first Prime Minister, stated that “[a] national goal. . . was to do away with the tribal system and assimilate the Indian people in all respects with the inhabitants of the Dominion, as speedily as they are fit to change” (Milloy, 1999, p. 6). For those Indigenous people who survived diseases such as smallpox epidemics, mass starvation due to the intentional slaughter of the buffalo, and other forms of genocide, what awaited their children was a Eurocentric, Christian-based education model which was falsely presented as their redemption. Strategic implementation of the Indian Residential School (IRS) was instigated with the Bagot Commission Report of 1845 which recommended educating Indian children in federally run IRS, proposing that severing the connection of children from their families and communities would be the best way to achieve assimilation. In 1971, Indigenous members of the Indian Association of Alberta knew full well the genocidal implications of Canadian policy on the lives of Indigenous peoples. Cree legal scholar Harold Cardinal, in a forwarding letter to the Director on Educational Planning, rejected “a powerless position in society. We state verbally that cultural genocide cannot be tolerated” (Indian Association of Alberta, 1971, p. ii). This policy document clearly demonstrated that First Nations in Alberta were fully aware of the problems that existed in their communities at the time, problems which have only intensified since that time, and that they were experiencing a cultural genocide. Justice Murray Sinclair, the Chair of the TRC, raises the question both within the commission’s report but also through public discourse. The TRC would come to describe this form of genocide in the Canadian context stating: For over a century, the central goals of Canada’s Aboriginal policy were to eliminate Aboriginal governments; ignore Aboriginal rights; terminate the Treaties; and, through a process of assimilation, cause Aboriginal peoples to cease to exist as distinct legal, social, cultural, religious, and racial entities in Canada. The establishment and operation of residential schools were a central element of this policy, which can best be described as “cultural genocide.” (p.1).

The term was further reinforced when then Supreme Court of Canada Chief Justice Beverley McLachlin was reported to have said that Canada attempted cultural genocide against Aboriginal peoples which was the worst stain on the country’s human rights record (Fine, 2015/05/29). This is further illustrated in the now quite famous statement by Duncan Campbell Scott, Deputy Superintendent General of Indian Affairs, in 1920: I want to get rid of the Indian problem. I do not think as a matter of fact, that this country ought to continually protect a class of people who are able to stand alone. That is my whole point. Our object is to continue until there is not a single Indian in Canada that has not been absorbed into the body politic, and there is no Indian question, and no Indian department, that is the whole object of this Bill.

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He would also state: It is readily acknowledged that Indian children lose their natural resistance to illness by habituating so closely in the residential schools and that they die at a much higher rate than in their villages. But this does not justify a change in the policy of this Department which is geared towards a final solution of our Indian Problem.

As the TRC pointed out, about 150,000 children would ultimately attend IRS as a way to eliminate the connection between culture, identity and the next generation. Starting in 1951, furthering the efforts to separate Indigenous children from culture and family, s. 88 of Indian Act was amended to bring provincial laws into place on Reserves which brought Indigenous children under the control of provincial and territorial child protection authorities (Bennett, n.d.; Hinge, 1985). This began a process which has been ongoing over surveillance of Indigenous parenting and the over representation of Indigenous children in the care of child welfare. By the 1960s, Canada saw large scale removal of Indigenous children, often being placed for adoption. This was also a period when removal of children at birth started to occur. This period became known as the Sixties Scoop which represented a pivotal shift in child protection practices based upon a belief that Indigenous parents were not capable of raising their children (Johnston, 1983). Both Indigenous and non-Indigenous scholars have asserted how the child welfare system has replaced IRS, actively participating in the ongoing genocide of Indigenous peoples (Bennett et al., 2005; Brittain & Blackstock, 2015; Lindstrom & Choate, 2016). Brittain and Blackstock (2015), citing the Office of the Auditor General in 2008, establish that First Nations children are six to eight times more likely to be taken into child welfare care than their non-Aboriginal counterparts. Oftentimes child welfare strategies will frame poverty as an avoidable problem that results from parents’ actions/inactions failing to recognize the deeply rooted systemic factors that explain poverty as a reality beyond failure or lack of parenting skills. As Brittain and Blackstock further, “The focus on individuals and groups as the cause of their own poverty allows governments to escape accountability for flawed public policy, both past and present” (2015, p. 18). Social work education too often uses deficit perspectives of Indigenous peoples, normalized via Eurocentric curriculum taught by primarily White educators who oftentimes have very little direct experience with Indigenous people or knowledge about the impacts of genocidal policies. As Johnston (1983) notes, social workers were not expected to know much, if anything about Indigenous culture or parenting practices. The Sixties Scoop was preceded not only by IRS, but also a practice of taking Indigenous babies at birth and adopting them. This was particularly true for unwed mothers whose babies were deemed “illegitimate” (Eggleton et al., 1983). This practice would later become known as “birth alerts” which involves social workers sharing information with the health system to create an alert to call child welfare when the mother shows up to give birth. These are slowly being discontinued across Canada. Recent statistics on the numbers of Indigenous children in the care of child welfare clearly demonstrates

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how the practices of Indigenous child apprehension that were established through provincial jurisdiction on Reserves and reified throughout the Sixties Scoop era continue to be destructive forces in the lives of Indigenous families today. Statistical evidence consistently demonstrates how Indigenous children do less well than their non-Indigenous counterparts in terms of healthy development and wellbeing (Bennett et al., 2005; Caldwell & Sinha, 2020; Sinha et al., 2013). Research also shows that this is a historical pattern resulting from genocidal policies in the legacy of the intergenerational impacts of IRS. Indigenous children are overrepresented among foster children. The majority of Indigenous foster children were First Nations (82%), while about 13% were Métis and 4% were Inuit. The most recent Canadian census indicates that 7.7% of children 14 and under in Canada are Indigenous but they represent 52.2% of children in care (Turner, 2016). These numbers symbolize a logical outcome of cultural genocide which has fragmented the communal, cultural and caring systems of Indigenous children and resulted in the intergenerational transmission (IGT) of this fragmentation as opposed to the intergenerational transmission of culturally defined and culturally determined parenting practices.

Intergenerational Transmission Children learn to parent largely through Intergenerational Transmission (IGT) of knowledge, beliefs, morals, behaviours and interactions. It is worth recalling that parenting is largely a relational activity to offer knowledge across and within generations (see Fig. 1). However, trauma passes across generations. For example, being removed from family and place and being forced to attend IRS, builds trauma in generation 0. This will get transmitted to subsequent generations through loss of healthy patterns. The IRS ran from 1830–1996 and, as noted above, child protection surveillance overlapped starting in 1951 (Hinge, 1985). Some children were placed by child welfare workers in residential schools while large numbers were placed in foster and adoptive care. As seen in Fig. 2, the intergenerational transmission of what would become dysfunctional parenting patterns has its roots in assimilative cultural genocide

Fig. 1 Intra and Intergenerational transmission of parenting behaviours

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Fig. 2 Persistent policy application of disrupting positive, culturally based parenting

policies that then morphed over the years into what is now the overrepresentation of Indigenous children involved with child protection. The processes of IGT reverberate beyond parenting implications and into community connections. Given how Indigenous nations take a collective approach to parenting, community impacts of intergenerational trauma add another layer of anguish. While IRS laid a blueprint for community violence through the intergenerational transmission of lateral violence, a cluster of learned behaviors that emerge “within oppressed societies and include bullying, gossiping, feuding, shaming, and blaming other members of one’s own social group as well as having a lack of trust toward other group members” (Bombay et al., 2014, p. 2). The child protection system has also been a contributing factor in the ostracizing of Indigenous people who were raised in White homes and then returned to their communities as outsiders who are often shunned for not fitting in. One might argue that the possibility of healthy parenting practices and the reproduction of healthy community relationships being transmitted are low. In our view, the contrary is the case although we accept that trauma takes generations to heal but a negative interpretation assumes that the impacts of cultural genocide are such that Indigenous parenting practices have been all but wiped out. Cultural genocide has been very damaging but it has not been successful in eliminating the intergenerational transmission of healthy, culturally determined parenting practices. Indigenous ways of child-rearing remain relevant in the lives of Indigenous nations and should not be thought of as remnants of forgotten history.

Sustained Culture In the Nistwatsiman project, Blackfoot elders illustrated three major conclusions regarding the sustaining of cultural parenting practices despite cultural genocide:

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1. Efforts to eliminate cultural practices were unsuccessful as many elders, across generations, held onto the spiritual, ceremonial and familial practices even though they were “underground”. The Indian Act outlawed Indigenous ceremonies leaving Elders and ceremonial knowledge-keepers to practice them in secret. 2. Knowledge was held and passed through generations creating subsequent generational knowledge keepers; and 3. Cultural and biological genocide failed even though large-scale damage occurred meaning that the basis of regaining strength in intergenerational parenting was possible and is now occurring. Yet, it is quite clear that there has been little work done to establish how Indigenous parenting is effective and sustaining (Muir & Bohr, 2014). In essence, the academic and clinical literature has largely minimized or even ignored the validity of these approaches to child rearing. Worse, Stewart (2009) notes Indigenous child rearing cultural practices are largely misunderstood leading to invalid decision making.

Theoretical Positioning From this, we postulate child protection does not understand the validity of parenting done by the largely collectivistic cultures of Indigenous peoples. Indeed, there is a growing literature on the gap between how Eurocentric descriptions of parenting differ from that of other populations (Kiima, 2021). This is not surprising given that the vast majority of research on family functioning, including parenting, is drawn from research that has been done by WEIRD populations (Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich and Democratic) (Henrich et al., 2010). The prime purpose of parenting includes the socialization of children within the social and cultural contexts of the caregiving system along with the understanding “at the core of most parenting practices is the desire to protect, nourish, nurture, educate, and socialise children competently” (Kiima, 2021, p.16). The goal is for children to fit in, belong and identify with their own context. For the Indigenous child, this means fitting into a culture that is collectivistic and has identifiable belief systems that reflect spiritual and relational ways of knowing and living rooted in cross generational teachings. Parenting is contextual as opposed to universal. Even how a child is seen to develop and go through milestones is more than a biological process but one intersecting with the ways in which the child is introduced to their world. An example given to us by an Elder in the Nistawatsiman project illustrates the point. A child struggles to open a door which is slightly too high to reach. The child struggles as adults sit nearby and watch but do not interfere with the child’s efforts. It is possible that the child will not succeed, may even become frustrated, but may succeed. By allowing the child to experience either success or failure, the child has learned about self and will incorporate that understanding.

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Fig. 3 The dyadic view of attachment relationship

Thus, the theoretical position of the caregiver is that the child can experience the self as opposed to an adult taking over the experience. Another example of the differences in the theoretical position can be seen with primary relationships. The work of Bowlby, Ainsworth and Main draws primarily on the notion of dyadic relationships. This can be seen in Fig. 3 which places the maternal child relationship as the primary attachment figure which will later extend to the father and other significant figures. The mother will be used as the root of safety from which other exploration occurs. There is no universally accepted definition of attachment that applies across cultures. Indeed, there is a vibrant research base showing attachment variations exist not only in specific cultural context but, also varies from nuclear to communal to collectivistic arrangements (Carriere & Richardson, 2009). However, when we look at communal societies, connections are, from the beginning, seen quite differently. Connections are multiple, intersectional and multidirectional. The early and mainstream researchers of Attachment Theory, Bowlby, Ainsworth (Bretherton, 1992; Bowlby, 1979) and Main (2000) did not focus upon such views of attachment although more recent researchers have done so. An example can be seen in the work of Heidi Keller (2018) who states: Non-Western traditional farmer families socialize infants to follow the directives of caregivers and become part of polyadic social encounters attending to a multiplicity of inputs at the same time. The underlying view of the child is that of a calm, unexpressive, quiet, and harmoniously well-integrated communal agent. Keller et al., conclude in a comment to the Mesman et al. paper that attachment theory and cultural/cross-cultural psychology are not built on common ground (p. 11417).

Neckoway et al. (2007), shows the dyadic model is not a fit for Canadian Indigenous cultures. This should clearly cause us to question why we would use the attachment views that derive from individualistic Eurocentric cultures and research that supports

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that view. Keller and Bard (2017) have shown there are valid ways to think of how collectivistic cultures accomplish attachment and provide for long term stability and security. The error is in misapplying individualistic interpretation with collectivistic cultural children. The point here is to show theories can have universal value (all children attach /connect with a caregiver or caregiving system) but there are vital cultural variations. Failing to understand theory in the applicable context is to impose one culture’s interpretation onto another culture. This has been the position of colonial forces who believe their way is the correct way invalidating the intergenerational lived experience of, in this case, Indigenous cultural beliefs and practices. We also find the notion of the cultural purpose of parenting to apply in our considerations of what is meant to be the outcome. Socialization places the child within the cultural context, but that context also has purpose and meaning. De Benedictis (2012) invites us to consider the political context of culturally based parenting by suggesting individualistic, neo-liberal approaches are focused upon creating value of the child as they become an adult that can be measured as having worth in the context of potential contributions to the workforce. Thus, the child will not become dependent upon society which is seen as diminished worth on neo-liberal societies. Self-directed and independence are valued in Western societies (Sandel, 2020; McNamee, 2018) whereas Indigenous worth is more connected to the interdependent position in which the health and survival of the whole is what matters (Bastien, 2016; Lindstrom & Choate, 2016).

Crossing the Divide Roger Poole (1972) advanced the notion of an ethical space between groups that can be both objective and subjective simultaneously. Take for example, the presence of a Eurocentric parent in a park watching their children play. The relationship is based upon a series of social norms, including what is appropriate behavior to be expressed in this location. The parent may express caution, offer suggested direction, and intervene when risk might be assessed as greater than the parent tolerates. Also present is an Indigenous parent with children who is also playing. That parent observes but does not interfere when risks might lead to harm reflecting the cultural beliefs of risk. Existent between the two parent-child gatherings is a space which reflects the differences in parenting. The differences are evident to the observer. In the absence of judgment, there is a space which separates the two styles but allows them to exist successfully together. Judgement causes the space to disappear as one feels they must, in some way, impose their understanding upon the other whom they believe to be parenting poorly. Without judgment, that space does not need to be filled but can be left available. Judgement brings together both objectivity and subjectivity. The objectivity assumes that there is a right standard which can be observed subjectively by describing how the behavior compares to the objective standard. Following the

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thinking of Poole (1972), we would have to accept that there is a truly observable objective standard. There is not unless one party insists on being right. Ermine (2007) has advanced Pool’s work by looking at the ethical space of engagement within the context of Indigenous and non-Indigenous relationships. Canadian colonial society has sought to close the space between it and Indigenous societies by forced engagement which brings with it the judgment of what is right. As Ermine notes, there is an “Institutionalized monoculture [that] creates the unfounded belief that there is a consensus about society and that the status quo of Indigenous – Western relations is the ‘norm’ in this country” (p. 198). This false belief robs Indigenous cultures of the freedom to be themselves which is at the root of the presence of child welfare in the space between Indigenous and Colonial society which renders the space non-ethical. Ermine (2007) invites a reopening of that space so that we might engage in intercultural conversation in which cultural diversity, values, beliefs and traditions can be shared as worthy on both sides of the space without one needing to denigrate and destroy the other. To do this, the structural conditions of the dominant society need to be not only illuminated and understood as sites of oppression, but also deconstructed so the true voice of Indigenous peoples can be heard. It is through this that the capacity of Indigenous peoples to care for their children can be seen. It equally means the methods of assessing ‘good enough’ parenting need to be rethought recognizing, different caregiving pathways yield successful entrance to adulthood. There is no one cultural approach that is superior to another. This also means child welfare will need to create ethical space to know without controlling or dominating what an Indigenous caregiving pathway might look like. As we have written elsewhere (Choate, 2019; Choate et al., 2019; Choate & Lindstrom, 2022; Lindstrom & Choate, 2022) this will require three substantive shifts in social work practice with Indigenous peoples: 1. Social workers will need to develop relationships with Indigenous communities to understand the child rearing practices that are normative to that culture; 2. Create new ways of seeing and assessing what ‘good enough’ care of a child looks like and abandon the Eurocentric normative approaches to assessing parenting competence; and 3. Place the needs of an Indigenous child as including priorities of connection, identity and belonging within culture as vital elements of safety and wellbeing for the child.

Acknowledging Rights Part of the ethical space is bringing into dialogue the place of the rights of Indigenous children. In Canada, this includes application of the principles of Act respecting First Nations, Inuit and Metis children, youth and families, (S.C. 2019, c.24; hereinafter Federal Act). This was introduced into law in 2020 setting out a series of principles that are meant to apply to all Indigenous children across the country. Friedland and Lightning-Earle (2022) note:

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Its purpose is to affirm and recognize, for the first time in Canadian history, Indigenous peoples’ inherent jurisdiction over Indigenous children and families as an Aboriginal (constitutional) right, set national standards for child and family services (CFS) delivery relating to Indigenous children and families, as called for by the TRC, and contribute to the implementation of the United Nations Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous Peoples [UNDRIP] (United Nations, 2007).

A rights-based approach is to step away from the notion that colonial society is justified in determining what an Indigenous child needs to one where the child, the caregiving system and the Indigenous community to which the child belongs is able to step into that space. The Federal Act creates opportunities for First Nations to establish their own child welfare authority and legislation in respect of their own children versus this being done by provincial or territorial governments. As at this writing, The Cowessess First Nation in Saskatchewan has taken this step while others in various parts of Canada are in the process of doing so. The Federal Act (Canada, 2019) is a step towards Indigenous families and caregiving systems being able to fulfill the rights articulated in UNDRIP (UN, 2007). Also relevant to a rights-based approach is the Convention on the Rights of the Child (UN, 1989), in particular Article 3.1 which states, “In all actions concerning children, whether undertaken by public or private social welfare institutions, courts of law, administrative authorities or legislative bodies, the best interests of the child shall be a primary consideration.” The Federal Act (Canada, 2019) is consistent with this but goes further by stating in s.10 that the consideration will be the Best Interest of Indigenous Child. The factors to be considered are also important. (3) To determine the best interests of an Indigenous child, all factors related to the circumstances of the child must be considered, including • (a) the child’s cultural, linguistic, religious and spiritual upbringing and heritage; • (b) the child’s needs, given the child’s age and stage of development, such as the child’s need for stability; • (c) the nature and strength of the child’s relationship with his or her parent, the care provider and any member of his or her family who plays an important role in his or her life; • (d) the importance to the child of preserving the child’s cultural identity and connections to the language and territory of the Indigenous group, community or people to which the child belongs; • (e) the child’s views and preferences, giving due weight to the child’s age and maturity, unless they cannot be ascertained; • (f) any plans for the child’s care, including care in accordance with the customs or traditions of the Indigenous group, community or people to which the child belongs; • (g) any family violence and its impact on the child, including whether the child is directly or indirectly exposed to the family violence as well as the physical, emotional and psychological harm or risk of harm to the child; and

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• (h) any civil or criminal proceeding, order, condition, or measure that is relevant to the safety, security and wellbeing of the child. The Federal Act (Canada 2019) adds the placement of an Indigenous child shall be considered in a cascading series of priorities. • 16 (1) The placement of an Indigenous child in the context of providing child and family services in relation to the child, to the extent that it is consistent with the best interests of the child, is to occur in the following order of priority: – (a) with one of the child’s parents; – (b) with another adult member of the child’s family; – (c) with an adult who belongs to the same Indigenous group, community or people as the child; – (d) with an adult who belongs to an Indigenous group, community or people other than the one to which the child belongs; or – (e) with any other adult. The Federal Act adds that it is vital to place the child with or near other children of their family system, maintain family unity, preserve their customs and traditions as well as attachment and emotional ties (Canada, 2019, s. 16 (2) (3), s. 17).

Social Determinants of Health Indigenous children are brought to the attention of child welfare most often for reasons of neglect, particularly related to lack of access to resources and care that in turn compromise their health. This clearly links to the historic treatment of Indigenous peoples in Canada. This is evident when considering the typical social determinants of health (SDH) factors which include access to economic resources, the community and social context of the child and family, health care, housing, and access to education. These are all factors that have been restricted to Indigenous families creating substantial intergenerational strain on the ability to meet the important needs that a child requires to grow. This may be too narrow a view and the WHO (2008) invites into a broader, wholistic discussion noting, “The conditions in which people live and die are, in turn, shaped by political, social, and economic forces” (Introduction). Authors such as Tait et al. (2013) and Greenwood and de Leeuw (2012) evolve this understanding to show child welfare, seen in its larger presence in Indigenous communities, has become a SDH. The Saskatchewan Child Welfare Review Panel noted “child welfare, as it applies to Indigenous and non- Indigenous children in Canada, has historically relied on a ‘threshold’ model, focused on rescuing children from harmful circumstances that generally fall under the two broad categories of ‘abuse’ and ‘neglect’ (p.11 as cited by Tait et al., 2013, p.42). Given that, the typical way that repair of the absence of SDH is done through bringing the child into care where they become situated into more ‘advantaged’, and typically non-Indigenous

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homes. This leaves SDH in communities unaddressed (Burghardt, 2021). Instead changes are occurring as a result of efforts the communities are undertaking.

We Can Raise Our Children As seen in the Nistawatsiman project a presumption that Indigenous communities are not able to find ways to care for their children comes from the deficit model. We contend that this presumption is untrue. Rather, when a cultural perspective is applied to caring for a child within culture, then the community is able to find solutions that not only meet SDH but also what we view to be a vital aspect of SDH, knowing who you are. A child raised out of culture becomes detached from knowing the self (identity) as an Indigenous person, including as a child of their specific Indigenous group. This leaves child welfare in the position of becoming a social detriment of health. Elder Roy Bear Chief offers a more complex way to think of the needs of a child within the collectivistic cultural view. Using the model of a spider web, we are able to not only think about the multiple layers of needs for a child within culture but also see them as intersectional. Elder Roy Bear Chief from the Siksika Nation tells the story of how the Ani to pisi (Spider web as seen in Fig. 4) can explain the intricate connections involved in the care of people. Creator asked the spider to make a web and surround the people with this protective web. If there was a disturbance in the thread, (which Roy referred to as a vibration) Creator would be there to help calm the vibration and restore balance. The spider web can be used to map out supports systems and resources. Vibrations (disturbances) can be quelled by the assistance of the supports that make up the web. This adaptation is being used to show the relational connections involved in the raising and care of an Indigenous child. This diagram does not represent all Indigenous views but is being used here as a mechanism to demonstrate the complexities of the relationships built within one’s culture. This emphasizes the need for social work to understand parenting from the specific cultural paradigm that is held by the cultural group. In the Nistawatsiman project it became clear that the child is seen as central to the community as opposed to an extension of the parent (See Fig. 5). In traditional Blackfoot parenting, from the moment of conception, a child is received into culture through such practices as drumming and singing to the mother with an understanding the child can internalize the songs. The mother, experiencing a sacred time in her womanhood in nurturing life, is given special treatment by community members. The child is often given a name even before it is born; thus the child knows who they are and their place at the center of community. As an autonomous person, the child is guided by various community members throughout the phases of their childhood development. For example, from birth to around 4 years of age, the mother as well as her sisters and other female members of the tribe spend the most time with the child. Between the years 5–12 the father and his

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Fig. 4 “Ani to pisi” Spider Web gifted to the author by Elder Roy Bear Chief as told to him by his brother Clement Bear Chief Fig. 5 The central place of the child within Blackfoot cultural beliefs. (Lindstrom & Choate, 2016)

brothers will offer guidance. During the teenage years, it is the role of other older adults to guide the youth as it is understood this is a sensitive time in a youth’s life and more guidance and discipline may be required. To prevent harsh feelings between the youth and parents, other members of the tribe step in to offer guidance and support to the youth. Seen as a gift, the child is treasured within the community and all members are invested in the healthy development of the child. When the child matures to adulthood, they offer the similar kind of parenting supports that they experienced. While Blackfoot society has undergone many changes, we argue that cultural embedded parenting practices and how the role of the child is conceptualized are relevant.

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In a more recent project associated with Blackfoot beliefs and the work of Abraham Maslow, the child was framed as not needing to move towards selfactualization, but is already born thus (Bear Chief et al., 2022). The child is neither as dependent upon parents but rather is a gift of the community nor is the child seen as without self-actualized agency. We posit that these are quite different views from those of Westernized societies.

Implications for Practice Social work and other helping professions will be required to shift their understanding of raising a child within an Indigenous culture while exploring the worldview held by the culture (Baskin, 2016). They will need to step into that ethical space where one culture can be seen as valid but so can the other; one approach to parenting can be effective within a cultural context but also that another approach can be effective in a different context. That may seem, on the surface, a fairly obvious and easy shift. It would be erroneous, however, to assume this. Eurocentric services are built largely upon the notion of Eurocentric understandings of how parenting is to be, the place of the child and the approaches of nuclear family. Health care, child protection, laws, jurisprudence, education and even recreation are built upon the presumption of that model being universally valid. While some might argue there has been progress, we cannot articulate dramatic changes. Burghardt (2021) argues, and we agree, social work has largely been sustaining the system holding groups such as Indigenous peoples in positions of weakness and deprivation rather than finding pathways into thriving. We believe Indigenous parenting is moving children, communities and generations away from the legacy of dominant control by Eurocentric society (as seen in Fig. 6) but the dominant society is fighting against that while it holds onto deficit views of Indigenous capacity to raise children. The victim-survivor position is where Eurocentric society’s discourse remains while Indigenous peoples see their raising of children within culture as based in overcoming and thriving (Fig. 6).

Conclusion We established how IRS was a primary mechanism for cultural genocide. Once the doors of those schools began to close due to shifts in federal Indian policy, provincial child welfare systems became another site wherein Indigenous family systems were fractured. This ruptured the connection to Indigenous identity and prevented the transmission of Indigenous ways of life. Eurocentric education via IRS as well as White foster homes provided the optimal conditions wherein Indigenous children were disconnected from their language, cultural practices and orientation, relational responsibilities, and meaningful engagement with their lands. With its culturally

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Fig. 6 Thinking beyond the deficit perspective to see where growth and strength emerge

discordant pedagogies, Eurocentric aims, and irrelevant curricula, cultural disconnection is continuously achieved through today’s mainstream education system. In a similar fashion, children raised in White homes are denied access to culture. Indigenous children who graduate from mainstream education or ‘age out’ of the child welfare system often do so at the cost of their identity, which in turn prevents their nations from creating a future as self-determining nations (Lemkin, 2005). The veil that cloaks cultural genocide is colonization through the continuous rupturing of Indigenous families and disruption of the intra and intergeneration processes of cultural transmission via parenting. We have argued that an ethical space must be established within social work practice that would enable a shift in current approaches. Only then will the child welfare system begin to acknowledge that Indigenous children have a right to culture.

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Truth and Reconciliation Canada. (2015). Honouring the truth, reconciling for the future: Summary of the final report of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada. Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada. Turner, A. (2016, April 13). Living arrangement of aboriginal children aged 14 and under. Insights on Canadian Society. Statistics Canada. https://www150.statcan.gc.ca/n1/pub/75-006-x/201 6001/article/14547-eng.htm UN General Assembly. Convention on the Rights of the Child, 20 November 1989, United Nations, Treaty Series, vol. 1577, p. 3. Retrieved October 17, 2021, from https://www.refworld.org/ docid/3ae6b38f0.html UN General Assembly. United Nations Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous Peoples: Resolution / adopted by the General Assembly, 2 October 2007, A/RES/61/295, Retrieved October 17, 2021, from https://www.refworld.org/docid/471355a82.html Wolfe, P. (2006). Settler colonialism and the elimination of the Native. Journal of Genocide Research, 8(4), 387–409. World Health Organization. (2008). Commission on social determinants of health: Final report: Executive summary. Author: . Retrieved October 17, 2021, from https://www.who.int/ publications/i/item/WHO-IER-CSDH-0

Peter Choate is a Professor of social work and program coordinator at Mount Royal University, Canada. His particular emphasis is on assessing parenting capacity (with specialties in mental health, domestic violence and child abuse and addictions) as well child and adolescent mental health including maltreatment, neglect and abuse (physical, sexual, emotional) FASD and these issues within family systems. He has presented nationally and internationally at various conferences and as a trainer for organizations in these areas. He has also appeared on over 150 occasions as an expert witness in child protection matters. Dr. Gabrielle E. Lindstrom Tsa’piinaki is a member of the Kainai Nation, Blackfoot Confederacy. An Assistant Professor in Indigenous Studies with Mount Royal University, her teaching background includes instructing on topics around First Nation, Métis, and Inuit history and current issues, Indigenous Studies (Canadian and International perspectives), Indigenous cross-cultural approaches, and Indigenous research methods and ethics. Her dissertation research focused on the interplay between trauma and resilience in the postsecondary experiences of Indigenous adult learners. Other research interests include meaningful assessment in higher education, Indigenous homelessness, intercultural parallels in teaching and learning research, Indigenous lived experience of resilience, Indigenous community-based research, parenting assessment tools reform in child welfare, anti-colonial theory, and anti-racist pedagogy.

The Evolving Challenges of Modern-Day Parenthood in Singapore Karen Mui-Teng Quek

“Get Married and Have Babies!” – this was an urgent call for Singaporeans to reproduce more. This came from Singapore founding father and former Minister Mentor, Mr. Lee Kuan Yew during his annual National speech on August 11, 2012. His message to the population was simple. He did not want the country “to fold”. Singapore is a very small country with little or no natural resources other than human capital. The only chance for national survival is to develop its human capital, that is, the ‘quality’ of its population (Göransson, 2015). Thus, increasing its population is an important focus of political attention and is considered an imperative for Singapore’s continuous economic advancement. So the Singapore government continues to strongly encourage couples to have children as Singapore is facing the threat of an aging population, compounded further by a low fertility rate (Hirschman, 2021). In Singapore, marriage remains the gatekeeper into the option of childbearing and parenthood. The traditional family unit, consisting of a heterosexual couple and their children, still forms the basis of Singapore society. Most Singaporeans continue to adhere firmly to pro-family ideals, and the family remains the top priority for Singaporeans (Elangovan, 2021). The Singapore families are well connected and mutually support each other for emotional, social and instrumental needs. But raising a family is impacted by the macro-systems in the political, social and economic arena. Every day parents are dealing with competing priorities and transitions that place great demands on their resources. Parents often invest substantial resources and energy in their children’s upbringing. The survey on our Singapore Values (2020) showed an interesting trend that the importance of work has dropped from being second in priority in 2002 to fifth in 2020 (Elangovan, 2021). Singaporeans ranked family, friends and wealth as their top three priorities, followed by leisure, work and religion, with politics at the bottom. Despite work

K. M.-T. Quek (✉) California State University, Dominguez Hills, Carson, CA, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_6

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dropping to the fifth rank in the 2020 study, fathers are reporting work gets in the way of their desire for more family time. In this chapter, I identify a number of important trends that influence parenthood in Singapore. I review current findings from available statistics on families in Singapore. I supplement local research studies with my knowledge and understanding of contemporary Singaporean parents’ relationships by identifying multiple influences shaping couple and parental roles.

More Working Couples, Rising Incomes & Shrinking Households Singaporeans Are Becoming Parents at a Later Age Singapore is facing a threat of a low fertility rate of 1.14 children born per woman, one of the lowest in the world. This presents a grave situation for a small nation like Singapore. The most commonly cited reasons for delaying marriage and parenthood pertain to greater emphasis on career advancement, financial stability and personal development. Additionally, the pressure to raise children as competitive citizens also plays out in everyday life. For most parents, quality comes before quantity when they make a decision about the number of children they will have (Göransson, 2015). Both women and men who desire marriage are getting married at a later age. The median age at first marriage for women has been increasing, from 27.7 in 2010 to 28.8 years in 2020, and for men, the median age was 30.4 years in 2020. As they get married later in life, they also start to have children later. Married couples with one child are an increasing trend. During the past decade (2011–2020), the fertility rate has declined across the different age groups, but it is more pronounced among the younger cohorts aged 30–39 years. Consequently, this group is less likely to achieve an average of two children by the time they reach 40–49 years. In 2020, 2-person households made up the majority in Singapore. Even though married Singaporeans state that they desire to have two or more children, the current total fertility rate is 1.14 (Hirschman, 2021). Singapore households are shrinking to 3 or fewer members. Family nucleus with at least one child have dropped from 82.9% in 2010 to 78% in 2020. This was mainly due to a dip over the same period in the share of couple-based households with children, from 56 per cent in 2010 to 47.7% in 2020.

Dual-Income Families Are Increasing The number of married, dual income families is increasing, bringing in higher incomes over the last 10 years (Hirschman, 2021). Current governmental socioeconomic policies have successfully led more married women into the labor force, which resulted in replacing the traditional structure of husband as sole breadwinner

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to a new family arrangement where both wife and husband work. Because Singaporean women are as well educated as their male counterparts, they have opportunities for highly skilled managerial, professional, and technical jobs and are likely to remain in paid employment long after marriage and childbirth. The trend indicated an increase in the female labor force participation rate, as well as an equalization of educational opportunities (Ho, 2021). The Department of Statistics, in releasing the population census 2021, indicated that married couples with an employed wife increased from 52.9% in 2010 to 60% in 2020. Households with only the husband employed dropped from 32.6% to 24.9%. About 74% of women in the prime working ages of 25–45 were employed, and the percentage of married working couples accounted for 52.5%, up from 47.1% in 2010 and 41% in 2000. The proportion of married couples in resident households with a working wife increased from 52.9% in 2010 to 60.0% in 2020. The proportion with only the husband employed decreased from 32.6% to 24.9% over the same period (Ho, 2021). Overall median household income from work had risen 3.3 per cent annually from $5600 in 2010 to $7744 in 2020.

Parent’s Tasks and Gender Legacy. And then Mother’s Career Identity Versus Maternal Obligation Working women with children constantly battle with the huge push-and-pull that they feel regarding home life and professional life. They want to be totally free to take jobs, and they also want their children to have the same intense bond with them. Holding a career has intrinsic value for all the mothers and is part of their identities whether or not they are currently working full time. In Quek and Knudson’s data (2008), one participant remarked, “I am not the type to stay at home, I can’t achieve very well at home.” The question before many mothers has been how to balance career identity with other societal expectations that emphasize maternal obligation. Many mothers struggle with integrating their identities as mothers and professionals. Mothers want to express their commitment to raising happy, healthy, engaged children while at work, without their commitment to their careers being questioned. The wives in Quek & Knudson-Martin’s 10-year longitudinal study said that they never intended to stop paid employment and emphasized the priority of professional development in their lives. During the 3 years since her child’s birth, Dai enrolled and graduated with a masters degree in education. “I personally can’t see myself being a housewife. . .I need to go out and do something, so having a career is important for me.” Her husband also expressed his commitment to mutual progression of both careers. Dai’s husband, Dan, made changes to support her career. However, gender expectations that taking care of children is a woman’s responsibility continued to be reflected in how Singaporean couples approached decisions regarding women’s employment. Nearly all the men described the decision as their wives’ choice. Women who scaled back to part-time work agreed that it was their

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decision. Kay: “Whatever decision I made, he was OK with it.” Though these husbands supported this decision, they also recognized the value of their wives’ work outside the home. Husband Feng responded, “I think that if she is a full-time housewife, she would go mad.” The wives who scaled back or dropped out of work cited maternal obligation as the reason. Expressing egalitarian ideals during their earlier days in their marriage did not soften the obligation women felt as mothers (Quek & Knudson-Martin, 2020). Mei, a wife with egalitarian views, saw scaling back her work as a necessary sacrifice: “Bringing up children is a parent’s job and they have to sacrifice something.” Husband Li Ben agreed with the importance of mother’s care. “This was the right thing to do for her, so I just went along with her.” Though these couples in which the wives scaled back have moved to a more gendered arrangement with wives making accommodation at work in order to fulfill family obligations, they continued conversations and plans for wives to return to full employment. Gender was reproduced when work-family decisions were automatically viewed as the woman’s choice. But undoing gender was facilitated when both partners prioritized women’s career identities. Interestingly, most women in the Quek et al. study (2011) did not describe motherhood in terms of personal fulfillment and natural bonds as is common among white mothers in the United States (Cowdery and Knudson-Martin 2005). Instead, women in this study described a pattern reported elsewhere in which motherhood is associated with social value in collectivist social structures; having children upholds family loyalties rather than individual goals (Kagitcibasi 2007). It is also consistent with Oyserman et al.‘s (2002) finding that people in collectivist contexts tend to give social rather than personal explanations for their decisions.

Maternal Duty and Work-Life Balance More than half of Singaporean two-parent families are dual-income families and their work hours are increasing. Singapore has been ranked the second most overworked city in a study of work-life balance of 40 cities (Today, 2019). As parents’ work hours increase, so too do the possibilities for the uneasy tension between work and family. Working parents, mostly mothers, are on-call in the family domains. Strain or anxiety at the workplace can also spill over into negative parenting practices. Recent 2020 Singapore data shows a steadily increasing trend of working mothers. Wives have contributed substantially to the combined income, and some earn as much as their husbands (Hirschman, 2021). The two-income households are in more financially advantageous positions with a median monthly combined income of $11,101. They have more flexibility in spending and are able to maintain a comfortable lifestyle. However, work-family balance is an enduring day-to-day challenge for mothers (Ho, 2021). Ng (2012), who works as a journalist, is a working mother of two young children who has considered quitting several times. She

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continues in her job because her understanding boss allows her to try an arrangement that works from home and at hours that suit her maternal duty. She remarks, “What works for working mums would be a change in employer mindset that flexible work arrangements can benefit both company and family.” That would be a win-win situation for all including fulfilling the national leaders’ call to have more babies. Finding satisfactory solutions on how to divide time between motherhood responsibility and job expectation is not easy as there is no single best way to combine those. But as employers put in place pro-family policies and adopt flexible work arrangements, particularly in teleworking and flexible hours, most working mothers are able to work on regular work-week arrangements (Ng, 2020). Relationships between parenthood and economic activity continue to differ between fathers and mothers. Consistent with Quek et al.’s findings (2006, 2011), mothers are less likely to be economically active than fathers, despite the increase of women in the workplace (Hirschman, 2021)).

Father’s Willingness to Co-Parent A strong marital relationship and fathers’ involvement in shared parenting go hand in hand. Fathers who are more satisfied with their marital relationship are more likely to agree that they are very close to their children and that they spend more time with their children alone (Elangovan, 2021). They show more commitment to their role as fathers and are more likely to agree that they have all the necessary skills to be good fathers. Equally shared parenting occurred when fathers restructured their work lives to accommodate parenting (Quek & Knudson-Martin, 2020; Quek, et al., 2011). When fathers did not, mothers struggled to realize their career identities and maternal obligations. Fathers, who actively engaged in parenting in a conscious manner, approached parenting decision-making and attended to the persistence of takenfor-granted gender legacies of male power and female sacrifice. Practically, men who share parenting responsibility describe making changes in their schedules to accommodate parenting tasks. Though Kay scaled back to part-time work, her husband Feng arranged his work schedule to maximize time with the family. He said that maintaining shared parenting meant that he had to change how he measured his achievements at work: “I try not to compare myself with other people [men who spend less time with their children].” Dr. Osman, Singapore Second Minister for Education, remarked, “... Gone are the days where fathers are regarded as feared disciplinarians in the family. . . It is heartening to see fathers today, more actively involved in their children’s lives. As fathers, we play a unique role in our child’s life and make a significant difference in shaping their self-esteem, character and values (Center for Father, 2021). Fathers continue to want more involvement with their children and participate in more parenting duties. Many of them remark that parenthood is a very fulfilling experience. An overwhelming agreement is that fathers are influential figures in the moral, social, psychological and intellectual development of their children. Many

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contemporary fathers want it all: time with kids, stability at work and to be a spouse who shares some parenting duties. Sadly, fathers are spending significantly less time with children than mothers (Ministry of Social and Family Development [MSFD], 2017). Four top parenting challenges cited by fathers are work responsibilities, financial pressures, lack of parenting resources about fatherhood, and lack of knowledge and skills on how to parent. Additionally, others reported societal views on how men should behave and mentioned resistance or lack of encouragement from other men as barriers to their involvement. While there are some positive surprising changes in perception toward shared parenting, there is also an inability to let go of some of the more traditional male roles that fathers have played and pick up some of the responsibilities that mothers have traditionally taken greater ownership in parenting. In one survey, 46% of fathers mention the traditional father image of “being a breadwinner” as their key responsibility (MSFD, 2017). When asked to think of their role as a father, what has been an important influence or source of help, 76% of them considered their wives or their children’s mother as the most important source and support. Despite the increase in father’s involvement in the home, childcare responsibilities continue to be under the purview of mothers. The modernization of the father’s role is developing slowly. In comparison with women’s change in the marketplace, men’s change in the home is slower. Their definition of masculinity is wrapped up in the economic provider role. Some men resisted doing tasks defined as not manly, especially when their own performance as a provider was compromised. In some family types, most notably those that remained male sole breadwinners, the men worked longer total work hours than women. So the gender gap in parenting continues to persist.

Gender Gap in Parenting Despite increasing expectations of father involvement, responsibility for childcare still rests primarily on women. In general, mothers tend to modify their work lives to accommodate parenting more than fathers do (Quek et al., 2011). Couples who successfully share parenting describe conscious negotiation of family-work responsibilities and an ability to deal with conflict. Yet, men’s gender expectations and perceptions of choice regarding work roles appear to be major factors determining the extent to which parenting and domestic labor is shared. Quek et al. (2011) in their 10-year-long qualitative study with Singaporean couples revealed how contemporary couples manage the transition to parenthood and identify the day-to-day processes involved as these heterosexual couples incrementally move toward equality in a collectivist context that is itself changing. It showed movement toward gender equality occurred in a series of daily decisions in which partners repeatedly either undid traditional gender patterns or recreated them (Quek & Knudson-Martin, 2020; Risman 2009). Thus, gender relations between contemporary Singaporean parents are dynamic, based on the intersection of societal pulls that both prompt gender equality and inhibit it.

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For women, many assumptions still underlie motherhood, making it difficult to integrate the identities of mother and professional in the workplace. Concealing these different parts of themselves causes stress for individual women. Maximizing productivity in both professional and personal life is not only to advocate for government policies and practices that support work-life integration, but to consciously dismantle gender norms in parenting.

Conscious Discussion of Parenting Responsibilities Research shows that the couples who undid gender through shared parenting approached parenting with conscious discussion regarding how to share the responsibilities (Quek et al., 2011). Both partners seemed committed to creating a relatively equal distribution of parenting tasks and described many hours of discussions and trial arrangements with childcare in order to maintain the shared division. In the example of Ping Ling and Lionel, he was responsible for managing childcare arrangements, “I manage the roster; I plan the scheduling. My role as a father is to make sure of that. . . because I don’t have the ability to handle everything, [that] I established a network [of caregivers].” Unlike models where women are responsible for finding childcare, a number of the fathers shared these responsibilities. An example is Han who did not leave childcare planning to his wife. “Like we have tons of meetings to attend at night. How do we then make sure someone is at home to take care of the baby. . . . Like right now I know [I] definitely need someone to take care of [son].” However, despite considerable pulls toward equally shared parenting, historical gender patterns also influenced parenting structures among other couples.

Influence of Gender Legacies Gender legacies are gender expectations that perpetuate traditional gender dichotomies and male power. Gender legacy parents organized their parenting practices around gender. In contrast to the constant negotiation of shared parenting, gender legacies influenced parenting without conscious discussion. Expectation of Female Sacrifice The first gender legacy that influenced parenting practices was the expectation that if a parent needed to sacrifice a career, it would be the mother. This was most pronounced in the case of Lindy and Chuan who were dealing with an autistic child. This couple did not discuss who would give up work. It was simply assumed that it would be Lindy. Chuan was aware of his wife’s sacrifice and the inequality this created. “Sometimes my wife feels that I am not helping, that I am not doing enough work.”

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Male Takes Over Childcare Decisions Another kind of gender legacy was related to the historical power of men as the leaders and decision-makers in the family. In the case of Yenni and Liang, parenting tasks for their two young children were shared, but male dominance persisted. For example, Liang changed childcare arrangements without consulting his wife. Liang: “I just pulled my son out from my in-laws’ place. What he [their son, Zack] does [there] is to just stare at the television most of the time and not interact, not doing anything to his motor skills.” Yenni: “So he decided that his mother takes care. Without discussing it with me first, he just decided that he [Zack] should stay there. So, because of that, I was not very happy. I feel at least he should have discussed it with me before you decide on your own.” It appears that father involvement in the context of traditional gender legacies may in some cases result in a new form of male dominance. As an involved father, Liang automatically transferred male authority to the area of childcare. Yenni, however, continued to resist this kind of male power. The power of men to determine the parenting structure was especially evident in the two couples classified as traditional parents. In each case, the mother tried to resist expectations that she sacrificed her career “for the family”, but their husbands’ preferences prevailed. For example, Brian pushed Tian to give up her job because he thought the children would do better when their mother is at home. “Why don’t you give it a try. And after that if you feel like ‘that’s fine and I’m not interested in staying home.’ Let’s go back and work.” Tian acquiesced even though her preference was to keep her job. Women Viewed as More Knowledgeable About Children Gender legacy also reproduced the gendered childcare pattern in which women are viewed as more knowledgeable about children and men disengage from childcare or function as assistants. Tian: “So whenever possible he [Brian] will bring him to the beach, taking him off my hands for maybe an hour or two.” When mothers were viewed as more knowledgeable, fathers did not see a role for themselves in parenting. Chen: “I am not very good with babies in the first place, so she took charge. Her mother would advise her.”

Undoing Gender Creating gender equality required undoing gender as usual (Deutsch & Gaunt, 2020; Deutsch 2007; Risman 2009; Quek & Knudson-Martin, 2006). Even though all the women in the Quek’s 2011 study described their careers as important to them, a number of factors inhibited marital equality. These included societal gender patterns that make decisions about childcare the responsibility of women, expectations that women sacrifice for their children and are knowledgeable about parenting, and the persistence of male dominance in parenting decisions. When alternatives for childcare arrangements were either not available or judged unsatisfactory, traditional gender was reproduced.

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However, many of the parents appeared to be undoing gender and creating new family patterns. Four factors enabled this change: (1) women’s career identities were prioritized by both partners; (2) fathers restructured their schedules to actively engage in parenting; (3) partners consciously discussed how to share parenting responsibility; and (4) there was support from extended family and hired labor. As in earlier Western studies, (e.g., Deutsch & Gaunt, 2020; Quek, 2009), undoing gender in this sample required considerable conscious discussion of how to share parenting responsibilities. If not, expectations of maternal obligation and women’s accommodation reproduced gender as usual. Though women are typically the instigators of pushes toward equality, this study also makes visible the importance of men in the process (Quek, 2009). Though some Western studies (Shows & Gerstel, 2009) suggest that working/middle class men may be more willing to accommodate their work schedules than high status men, this study raises the possibility that the creation of gender equality may differ somewhat in some collectivist contexts. As couples are confronted with how to value dual careers, children, and marital relationships within a changing social structure, a new model of fatherhood and couple relationship is being demonstrated by most of them, even though they expressed traditional gender ideals. This parental model is similar to the relational model of harmony among Chinese American parents in the United States, in which couples describe high levels of parental involvement by both parents and a collaborative, relatively egalitarian relationship style (Quek et al., 2010). Couples explained decisions based on a common collectivist goal of maintaining cooperation (Oyserman et al., 2002), but they also drew on individualistic values. While recognizing that not all residents in Singapore embrace collectivist goals, the value toward in-group’s duty (in this case, the family) is consistent with a recent survey where Singaporeans cite family responsibility as their top priority (Elangovan, 2021).

Equal Parenting Within a Larger Network Some Western researchers have noted that the addition of children can be associated with a decreased social network of extended family and friends due to time constraints and work overload (Viers and Prouty 2002). This did not appear to be the case for Singaporean couples. Contributions by their social network made it easier for the couples to carry out their careers and commitment to each other. In fact, support from extended families turned out to be a critical factor. Without this extended help, it is very likely that the couples would have reverted back to the automatic gendered tradition. Another factor contributing to retaining an egalitarian partnership was hiring help. Singapore couples purchased services, mostly for household chores (Göransson, 2015).

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Availability of External Support The availability of external support makes it easier for couples to undo traditional gender patterns. Grandparents are engaged to provide childcare, and many couples hire help with housework (a support made possible by government policies that encourage maids from other countries to work as domestic helpers). For example, Lionel and Ping Ling both worked in middlemanagement positions in the financial sector. They shared parenting of their twin boys with the aid of live-in domestic help and their parents. Ping Ling said this gave them flexibility as a couple: “they (the kids) sleep at 8 or 8.30, after that we are free, we can go out.” She noted that this surprised their friends. One of them said, “Hey, you don’t look like you have kids. What are you doing here? Don’t you have to go home and take care of them?” I said, “...you just need someone to watch out for them (the grandparents) in case they wake up.” Lionel added that, “Friday nights the kids don’t go back home. They stay at my in-law’s place.” He saw involvement by grandparents as good for their children. “Everyone has an equal time slot [two sets of grandparents and parents]. The kids get the best of three worlds; they are in good hands with family members.” Parenting was viewed as a function of the entire family. In addition, domestic assistance lightened the workload of dual-career couples, enabled women more time to develop their careers (Göransson, 2015), and helped men participate more fully in parenting responsibilities. Siti: “She (the domestic help) cleans everything. . .so when we come home from work, we want to spend time with him [their son]. We also spend time with each other. And the weekends are spent with our parents.”

Policies and Practices Supporting Families: Children’s Academic Performance, Parents’ Major Concern The competitive education system has been a major concern for families. Singaporean parents place great importance on education and have invested much time, effort and financial resources to ensure that their children are getting ahead in their academic pursuits (Luo et al., 2013). Though Singapore schools are among the best in the world, parents continue to load on hours of tuition, in addition to regular schoolwork, and pile up assessment books to prepare for the final stretch of major examinations. Reports show that parents spend S$820 million a year on both center and home-based private tuition alone (Koh 2012). In Singapore, hiring a tuition teacher or private tutors is a type of investment not normally found in other countries. Most students in Singapore have a private tutor at some point in their schooling days. One parent reportedly spends nearly S$6000 a month in tuition fees alone, even when her son is a straight “A” student in a prestigious boys’ school. In many cases, parents are so stressed about major examinations such as the Primary School Leaving Examination (PSLE) that they take leave from work to monitor, coach and even study with their children. Additionally, Singaporean parents have

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gone to the extent of securing temporary rentals within 1 km of a popular school and shelling out S$3000 monthly rent for a minimum lease of 2 years, with the hope of enrolling their children there. While this move does not guarantee a place in the school, those applicants who live near the schools stand a better chance of catching Primary 1 places during balloting. In Singapore, parents recognize the importance of effort and academic performance. The emphasis on effort exertion has pressured Singapore children to study for long hours and engage in other enrichment classes such as piano lessons, martial arts classes, or Chinese acting classes. Parental involvement in a child’s education is an important mechanism through which children are socialized for academic success. Most mothers spend a great amount of time assisting and supporting their children in their learning activities. This might be one of the reasons why Singapore students achieve high scores on international assessments. But anxieties around preparing one’s children for the future fall heavily on mothers (Göransson, 2015).

Childcare Subsidies & Tax Concession Over the years, the Singapore government has introduced various childcare schemes and fiscal policies to support working mothers in the workforce (MSF, 2022). Policies including a paid maternity leave scheme, paid childcare leave and subsidized childcare, a baby-bonus scheme, lower maid levy, and other tax incentives have been implemented to encourage women to produce more children. These policies underscore married women’s traditional domestic role, which includes taking responsibility for childcare and household duties. Mothers receive more financial support and benefits for parenting not available to fathers. For instance, Working Mother’s Child Relief (WMCR) is given to encourage married women to remain in the workforce after having children. The working mother’s child relief allows mothers to claim up to 100% of their earned income for all her qualifying children (with a cap at S$50,000 or USD40,364 for each child) (MSF, 2022). Mothers also receive 4 months paid maternity leave. However, fathers are now entitled to 2 weeks of paid paternity leave funded by the Government, according to the new policy (MSF, 2022). However, the birth incentives clearly benefit mothers and further “feminize” the parenting role. A more inclusive approach is needed to embrace fathers to share parenting responsibilities and to provide flexiwork alternatives for both parents. To many Singaporeans, the one-sided family policies would not work but continue to overburden working mothers (Ng 2012).

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Childcare Services The topic of childcare forms the nucleus of what work-family conflict is about. Childcare arrangements are important for working parents. Many younger parents struggle with making decisions on the type of childcare services and preschools. In 2019, Singapore had 1517 registered childcare centers, which were open year-round with a capacity to accommodate 171,660 (Preschool Enrolment Statistics Singapore (PESS), 2019). Though many working parents prefer to leave their children with their grandparents or family members or other experienced nannies, 119,333 children are using the services of childcare centers that come with various types of subsidies provided by the government. Childcare centers are easily accessible to accommodate parents’ time crunch. More preschool centers are added to meet the childcare demand of many young families (PESS, 2019). A strong parent-center partnership is strongly encouraged for the wellbeing of the child. But the high levels of stress in schools remain a longstanding concern of Singaporean parents.

Time for Children Singaporean parents know the tug of feelings that goes along with the lack of time with children. But in today’s busier, more child-centered age, working mothers and younger parents intend to get in more hours of focused childcare even though they do more paid work. Time-mindedness is clearly part of family life. Although some parents cut back on their work hours to reduce work-to-family conflict and apply for additional months of unpaid leave to nurse their infants, others multi-task and share caregiving responsibilities, making sure that they alter other commitments to satisfy their perceptions of adequate time with their children. In our modern society, fewer women want to lead the kind of life with a breadwinner father and homemaker mother (Quek et al., 2011). So in order to prioritize mothers’ hours of direct time with children, they have given up hours in other parts of their lives. For example, instead of going home and cleaning the house and doing laundry, they go home and spend time with their children. Younger parents decided to give up some housework. They purchase more services to replace their time in housework. Families with more disposable incomes often opt for household services. Singapore is one of the top hiring countries with one in five or six households hiring a live-in migrant domestic worker to be responsible for taking care of household chores so that parents will have more contact time with their children after working hours. According to the Singapore Family Values Survey, Singaporean parents spend an average of 5 hours a day with their children, with mothers spending more time with them (Toh, 2016). Not all times spent with children are the same. The sorts of activities parents do with their children vary from helping them with homework, heart-to-heart communication to just being present with children who could be playing on their own.

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Conclusion Singaporeans possess a healthy mindset on family and familial relationships. Most still emphasize strong family ties and cherish family values. Singaporeans also possess marriage aspirations and desire to be parents and have more children. However, the gap between reality and ideals persists. Competing priorities and responsibilities between motherhood, fatherhood and jobs pose tough challenges for parents to ensure that family commitments remain as the main anchor. Increasingly Singaporean families feel that they need dual incomes to survive. Despite the many positive changes for men, it is women who experience the difficulty of integrating the identities of mother and professional. Policymakers, educators, and practitioners must be prepared to help families respond to ambiguous social norms and taken-for-granted assumptions that women maintain responsibility for family bonds while also participating in the labor force. Quek & Knudson-Martin (2020) suggest that much depends on the willingness of men to share power and parenting tasks. Therefore, it is imperative that workplaces, schools, and practitioners emphasize fathers, not just the mothers, as playing a significant role in parenting. If fathers continue to be perceived as secondary parents, then mothers will continue to bear the heaviest childcare burdens, and fathers will find it more difficult to actively engage in parenting. So reframing workforce and parenting issues as dual-career couples issues will help alleviate women’s second shift. Though Singapore has introduced a 2-week paid paternity leave, more could be done in policy to take men’s role in child rearing seriously. Couples were able successfully to manage dual careers and child rearing when they could draw on resources outside the couple relationship. Parents without an available support network, or who are dealing with more difficult circumstances, have fewer options and may need additional resources and help making conscious, genuinely shared decisions rather than automatically falling back on traditional gender structures. Family continuity is a matter of great importance in many Asian communities, including Singapore (Kagitcibasi 2007). Engaging grandparents to look after grandchildren appears to be a workable solution for many in this generation. However, finding high-quality stable childcare arrangements continues to be an important issue. That includes having multiple childcare arrangements to meet the growing phases of the children. Families may need a wider range of options if future generations of grandmothers are not available for childcare as they are encouraged to be in the workforce. Considering how responsibility for parenting may be extended beyond the couple unit is also an important issue to the Singapore society that seeks to maximize the economic and personal potential of all Singaporeans.

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References Center for Fathers. (2021). Back to school with dad. Retrieved February 17, 2022 from https:// fathers.com.sg/back-to-school-with-dad-encourages-fathers-to-be-more-involved-in-their-chil drens-schooling-journey/ Cowdery, R., & Knudson-Martin, C. (2005). The construction of motherhood: Tasks, relational connection, and gender equality. Family Relations, 54, 335–345. Deutsch, F. M. (2007). Undoing gender. Gender and Society, 21, 106–127. Deutsch, F., & Gaunt, R. (2020). Creating equality at home: How 25 couples around the world share housework and childcare. Cambridge University Press. Elangovan, N. (2021). Family is still top priority for Singaporeans. Retrieved February 15, 2022 from https://www.todayonline.com/singapore/family-still-top-priority-singaporeans-impor tance-work-has-declined-2002-ips-survey Göransson, K. (2015). Raising successful children: Children as accumulation strategy and the renegotiation of parenting arrangements in Singapore. The Asia Pacific Journal of Anthropology, 16(3), 211–226. https://doi.org/10.1080/14442213.2015.1028431 Hirschman, R (2021). Fertility rate in Singapore 2020, by age group. Retrieved February 15, 2021 from https://www.statista.com/statistics/622773/singapore-fertility-rate-by-age-group/ Ho, G. (2021). More dual-income couples in Singapore with equal qualifications: Population census. Retrieved February 11, 2022. https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/politics/moredual-income-couples-in-spore-with-equal-qualifications-population-census Kagitcibasi, C. (2007). Family, self, and human development across cultures. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates. Knudson-Martin, C. (2009). Capturing the lived experience of couples. In C. Knudson-Martin & A. R. Mahoney (Eds.), Couples, gender, and power: Creating change in intimate relationships (pp. 31–40). Springer. Koh, M (2012). Parent pays nearly s$6,000 a month in tuition fees. Retrieved August 12, 2012, from http://sg.news.yahoo.com/blogs/singaporescene/things-consider-sending-child-tuition classes-102823408.html. Luo, W., Aye, K. M., Hogan, D., Kaur, B., & Chan, M. C. Y. (2013). Parenting behaviors and learning of Singapore students: The mediational role of achievement goals. Motivation and Emotion, 37, 274–285. Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSFD). (2017). Family and work: Insight series. Singapore. https://www.msf.gov.sg/research-and-data/Research-and-Data-Series/Documents/ SoF%202011%20part%202.pdf Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSFD). (2022). Research and data series. https:// www.msf.gov.sg/research-and-data/Research-and-Data-Series/Pages/Data-Tables-Gender.aspx Ng, J. (2012, August 5). What works for working mums? Sunday Times, pp. 38–39. Ng, L. (2020). Conditions of employment 2020. Retrieved February 2022 https://stats.mom.gov.sg/ iMAS_PdfLibrary/msd-coe-2020.pdf Oyserman, D., Coon, H., & Kemmelmeier, M. (2002). Rethinking individualism and collectivism: Evaluation of theoretical assumptions and meta-analyses. Psychological Bulletin, 128, 3–72. Preschool Enrolment Statistics Singapore. (2019). The preschool landscape in Singapore. Retrieved February 2022 https://skoolopedia.com/preschool-singapore-infographic/ Quek, K. (2009). We-consciousness: Creating equality in collectivist culture. In C. Knudson Martin & A. R. Mahoney (Eds.), Couple, gender, and power: Creating change in intimate relationships (pp. 193–214). Springer. Quek, K., & Knudson-Martin, C. (2006). A push towards equality: Processes among dual-income couples in a collectivist culture. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 68, 56–69. Quek, K., & Knudson-Martin, C. (2008). Reshaping marital power: How dual career newlywed couples create equality in Singapore. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 25, 513–534.

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Quek, K. & Knudson-Martin, C. (2020). Gender equality in dual career marriages in Singapore. In F. M. Deutsch & R. Gaunt (Eds.), Equality at home: How 25 couples around the world share housework and childcare. Cambridge University Press. Quek, K., Knudson-Martin, C., Rue, D., & Alabiso, C. (2010). Relational harmony: A new model of collectivism and gender equality among Asian American couples. Journal of Family Issues (Special Edition on Asian American Families), 31, 358–380. Quek, K., Knudson-Martin, C., Orpen, S., & Victor, J. (2011). Gender equality during transition to parenthood: Longitudinal study of dual-career Singaporean couples. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28(7), 943–962. https://doi.org/10.1177/0265407510397989 Risman, B. J. (2009). From doing to undoing: Gender as we know it. Gender and Society, 23, 81–84. Shows, C. & Gerstel, N. (2009). Fathering, class, and gender. Gender and Society, 23, 161–187. https://doi.org/10.1177/0891243209333872 Today. (2019). Singapore ranks 32 out of 40 for work-life balance, second most overworked city. https://www.todayonline.com/singapore/singapore-ranks-32-out-40-work-life-balance-secondmost-overworked-city Toh, E. M. (2016). Long working hours keeping Singaporean families apart. https://www. todayonline.com/singapore/long-working-hours-keeping-sporean-families-apart-survey Viers, D., & Prouty, A. (2002). We’ve come a long way? An overview of research of dual career couples’ stressors and strengths. Journal of Feminist Family Therapy, 13(2/3), 169–190.

Karen Quek holds a PhD in Marital and Family Therapy from Loma Linda University. Currently, she is the Department Chair of the Marital and Family Therapy Program at California State University, Dominguez Hills. She has over two decades of experience in academic leadership, supervisory and clinical practice in the United States and other parts of the world, including China, Singapore, and the Philippines. Dr. Quek is dual-licensed as a marriage & family therapist (LMFT) and a professional clinical counselor (LPCC). She has achieved national “Approved Supervisor” status of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) and was a commissioner for the Commission on Accreditation for Marriage and Family Therapy Education (COAMFTE). Her current research interests include multicultural clinical work, cross-cultural family processes, couples relational dynamics, and intersectionality in family therapy leadership.

Advances in the Study of Parenting in Argentina María Cristina Richaud, Jael Vargas-Rubilar, and Viviana Lemos

Introduction Parenting research gains significant relevance, as it is precisely within the family and in the parental relationships that children grow up, develop emotionally, acquire the first cognitive and motor skills, and incorporate cultural patterns and social values (Vargas-Rubilar & Richaud, 2018). Parental construction is an extremely complex process as we see from early studies to the most recent ones. Parenting includes: (1) parental styles, defined as a combination of attitudes toward the child that creates an emotional climate in which parents act; (2) parental practices, or the behaviors that parents carry out to ensure their children reach specific academic, social, and emotional objectives (Darling & Steinberg, 1993); and 3) parental competence or “the practical abilities that mothers and fathers have to take care of, protect, educate their children, and assure them a sufficiently healthy development” (Barudy & Dantagnan, 2010, p.34). Parenting is influenced by biological-hereditary components, modulated by vital experiences, the culture, and social contexts where the parent has evolved (Barudy &

M. C. Richaud (*) Consejo Nacional de Investigaciones Científicas y Técnicas (CONICET), Buenos Aires, Argentina Centro Interdisciplinario de Investigaciones en Ciencias de la Salud y del Comportamiento (CIICSAC), Universidad Adventista del Plata (UAP), Entre Ríos, Argentina Instituto de Ciencias para la Familia (ICF), Universidad Austral (UA), Buenos Aires, Argentina e-mail: [email protected] J. Vargas-Rubilar · V. Lemos Consejo Nacional de Investigaciones Científicas y Técnicas (CONICET), Buenos Aires, Argentina Centro Interdisciplinario de Investigaciones en Ciencias de la Salud y del Comportamiento (CIICSAC), Universidad Adventista del Plata (UAP), Entre Ríos, Argentina © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_7

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Dantagnan, 2005, 2010). Indeed, many investigators (Bronfenbrenner, 1979; Kotchick & Forehand, 2002; Richaud de Minzi, 2010a) recommend analyzing parenting across cultures. Although the theoretical models that relate parenting to the socioemotional adjustment of the child do not vary among different socioeconomic contexts and cultures, variations can occur in the characteristics or degrees to which these variables are presented and in the ways that children perceive parental behaviors.

Parenting Styles in Middle-Class Argentine Culture Argentina is in South America; it is the continent’s second-largest land area, after Brazil. It is constituted as a federation of 23 provinces and an autonomous city, Buenos Aires. It is the eighth-largest country in the world by land area and the largest among Spanish-speaking nations. Argentina is a constitutional republic and representative democracy. It is Latin America’s third-largest economy, with a “very high” rating on the Human Development Index. It is classed as a middle emerging economy. Argentina is a country of immigrants. Most modern Argentines are descended from settlers and immigrants from Europe from the 15th to the 19th centuries, some of whom later mixed and intermarried with the indigenous populations. Most of these European immigrants came from Italy and Spain. 86.4% of Argentina’s population self-identify as being of European descent. An estimated 8% of the population is Mestizo. According to the World Christian Database, Argentines are 92.1% Christian, and most are Roman Catholic, with estimates for the number of Catholics varying from 70% to 90% of the population (though perhaps only 20% attend services regularly). Argentina retains Latin - people of Southern European origin (especially Italy, France, Spain, and Portugal) -and Catholic cultural traditions that have high regard for collectivistic values, especially those related to the family. The family is considered to be much more important than country, religion, or politics. Argentine children feel a greater closeness to their parents (especially their mothers), siblings, and extended family members than to friends compared with their North American and Northern European counterparts (Facio & Resett, 2006). Child-rearing practices are based on power assertions during discipline, and Argentine parents control their children’s outings, schedules, and friends in what may be a more intrusive manner than their North American and Northern European counterparts (Facio & Batistuta, 1998). In general, children observe a close relationship between their parents and their grandparents, especially between their mothers and their maternal grandmothers. The gap between the genders has narrowed over the decades about work, education, and political activity (Facio & Resett, 2006). There are no gender differences in Argentine formal education about preparing for adult work roles. Both genders attend the same schools, the vast majority of which are coeducational (Facio & Resset, 2006), although it is highly probable that due to cultural differences in norms

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and expectations regarding appropriate gender roles and behaviors, teachers and other officials would treat men and women differently. Several studies have been conducted in Argentina to study how children of different ages perceive parenting styles, and the results have supported the cognitive theory that the quality of the parent-child relationship affects the child only insomuch as the child perceives it. That is, a child’s attributions regarding his or her father’s or mother’s behavior will be more related to his or her development than the actual parental behavior. Schaefer’s (1965) proposed model allows for joint and interactive consideration of the effects of different parenting behavior dimensions in studies of different parenting styles. Gender differences in Argentine parenting and child outcomes can be attributed to societal norms. The mother is the central figure in Argentine family life, most likely due to the country’s Latin and Catholic traditions. Facio and Batistuta (1998) asserted that there is a belief in the moral and spiritual superiority of women compared with men. The Catholic devotion to the Virgin Mary places high importance on motherhood. Women are expected to sacrifice themselves for their children and the rest of the family; in exchange, they are venerated and exercise a considerable amount of power at home. Boys and girls are more likely to forgive their mothers’ faults than their fathers’, and relationships with mothers deteriorate only because of serious circumstances. In this sense, 4- to 6-year-olds perceive a relationship of control with their mother. However, in an affiliative culture, such as Argentina, control is not perceived as negative as Schaefer defined it within the context of the United States (Richaud de Minzi, 2002). Interestingly, children perceive the affirmation: Your mom says that if you love her, you will behave well positively (i.e., natural reciprocity of affection) and not as emotional “blackmail” from the mother or as generating anxiety. The social definition of a “good child” can explain this finding. However, younger children perceive control exerted by the father as more intrusive since he spends the small amount of time he has with them controlling them (e.g., have they done what was ordered, did they tidy up their clothing, who were they with, and so on). Also of interest is that the aforementioned affirmation about behaving well out of love for their mother has a different meaning in the context of their father. As previously mentioned, Argentine culture exalts and honors the mother’s abnegation, but this behavior is not as pronounced concerning the father’s. Therefore, it might be more natural for children to return their mother’s love than their father’s (Richaud de Minzi, 2002). A similar pattern has been found in 8- to 12-year-olds (Richaud de Minzi, 2007a, b). The statements related to control that Schaefer (1965) discussed in the context of the United States refer to possessiveness and intrusiveness. Argentine children do not always perceive these characteristics as undesirable. On the contrary, statements that begin My mother/father. . . and conclude. . .always wants to know where I am and what I am doing all the time, . . .makes me return home in time”, “. . .always monitors what I do in school and during my free time”, “. . .tells me that, if I truly love her/him, I must behave well to not upset her, or . . .insists that I must do everything that she/he tells me are indicative of acceptance; they are expressions of affection and care. This finding is most likely due to cultural reasons, given that these

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are Latin children from an affiliative culture. Age might also play a role, given that 8to 9-year-olds are expected to return home on time (e.g., from school) and that their parents know where they are and what they are doing. Argentine children accepted specific expressions that began “My mother/ father. . .” and concluded . . .worries when I misbehave because I will suffer the consequences when I grow older”, “. . .tells me that, if I truly love her/him, then I must behave well so that I do not upset her/him”, and “. . .says that misbehaving is bad, and I might have problems when I grow up”, whereas these statements indicate the use of control through anxiety and blame according to Schaefer’s model. This difference is due to Latin cultural guidelines regarding the definition of a “good” parent, which include worrying about and suffering for the children (Richaud de Minzi, 2007a, b). Conversely, Argentine children do not accept the statements that begin “My mother/father”. . . and conclude “. . .makes me comply with what she/he orders”, “. . .insists that I do my homework”, and “. . .worries when I do something that I should not. These statements operationalize coercion to comply with orders and control according to Schaefer’s model. However, these statements do not express extreme or harmful forms of control, such as hostility or rejection. They are perceived as expressions that are neither damaging nor benign. Specifically, these statements are perceived as a strict form of control that is fair but unpleasant. The control that we denote as pathological due to its negative effects on child development (i.e., hostility, isolation, guilt, distrust caused by intrusion and dependence, and possessiveness) is better differentiated of the two aforementioned forms of control. Although women are highly regarded for their role as mothers, young people of both genders consider “being capable of caring for children “to be an important quality of adult males. Nevertheless, girls are socialized to be more involved in domestic chores and less involved in jobs than boys (Facio & Resett, 2006). Children, especially boys, perceive that their fathers spend little time with them (Richaud de Minzi, 2002, 2005). Argentine maternal attachment facilitates social involvement and is a protective factor against loneliness among girls and boys (Richaud de Minzi, 2010a, b). As previously stated, the mother is typically the central figure in Argentine family life, whereas fathers tend to have less involvement in their children’s friendships, homework, parent-teacher conferences, and so on. Despite these family norms, mothers are also perceived as more tender, understanding, and devoted than fathers (Facio & Batistuta, 1998). Although in the last years there has been an increased father involvement in families and many women have become incorporated into the labor market, many in Argentina still consider that father’s work is more important than the mother’s, and that father can be out of home more of the time than the mother can. Many women stop working when having a baby, especially in the low socioeconomic levels. Fathers help mothers in some housework, but the responsibility of home and children is mainly the mothers’. In Argentina, girls typically have close relationships with their mothers and maternal grandmothers (Facio & Resett, 2006). These relationships are most likely an important protective factor against loneliness. In contrast, fathers tend to display affection for their sons in a different way although they love them a lot. They

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accomplish household chores, play football (soccer), attend games, and engage in more functional tasks together. It is also common that men embrace each other and their children, and even say hello with a kiss. However, boys typically demand more availability from their fathers compared with girls (Richaud de Minzi, 2002, 2005). In Argentina, girls typically have more academic success than boys. However, they evaluate their school competence as lower than that of boys, most likely because of the cultural belief that boys are more capable than girls. Nevertheless, girls try harder than boys (Facio et al., 2006; Richaud de Minzi, 2005). Girls gain security and build school self-competence by relying both on their fathers and mothers. However, boys rely on their mothers and fathers to motivate them but seek their mother’s help to a lesser degree. The only significant predictor of girls’ social self-competence is the availability of the mother. This finding is likely due to the previously described Argentine mother-daughter relationship (Richaud de Minzi, 2010a, b). In general, Argentine children of middle socioeconomic levels perceive moderately high levels of acceptance, moderate to extreme levels of control, a moderately high level of accepted control, and a low level of extreme autonomy or negligence from their parents, especially their fathers. This style is characterized by a concern that focuses on the child to express affection and emotional support. At the same time, this style promotes open communication and exchange, freedom of expression, independent thought, and sensitivity to the child’s needs. However, the establishment of boundaries and norms (which are perceived as caring for the child in Argentine culture) accompany these forms of acceptance. Moreover, close parental supervision establishes norms. Although the child might perceive these norms as an imposition and protest, they are not rejected. However, forms of excessive control, such as intrusion, imposition of strict norms, punishment, and reprimands are also found in moderation. Lax parental control in which the child is given total freedom without imposing rules or establishing boundaries appears infrequently. Furthermore, Argentine children generally perceive this style as parental negligence or ignorance about meeting their needs (Richaud de Minzi, 2002, 2005, 2007a, b).

Parenting Styles in the Low Socioeconomic Stratum Several researchers have concluded that an authoritative parenting style predicts generally positive results in children’s development and wellbeing (Carlson et al., 2000; Radziszewka et al., 1996; Steinberg et al., 1992). However, a series of studies conducted across different cultures indicates that an authoritative parenting style is not always related to optimal socialization for children and adolescents (Bornstein & Bornstein, 2010; García & Gracia, 2010). Therefore, the ideal parenting style for socialization depends on the culture in which it develops (Chao, 1994; Kotchick & Forehand, 2002). Several studies have suggested that authoritarian parenting styles are necessary and protect children living in urban poverty (which places them at high risk) by facilitating their adaptation to a difficult environment (Brody & Flor, 1998; Furstenberg et al., 2000).

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Middle-class children who attend safe schools or live in friendly neighborhoods might perceive always being asked where they are going, with whom, and at what time they will return, or being accompanied by a parent everywhere as an intrusion. However, children who live in highly dangerous neighborhoods and whose schools are unprotected might perceive the same parenting style as acceptance and care. Therefore, control should be considered acceptable in this latter case (Richaud de Minzi, 2010a, b). We examined whether the theoretical model that relates parenting styles to children’s emotional development and aggressiveness holds for Argentine and Spanish children who live in poverty (Richaud et al., 2013b). We found that how parenting styles affect children’s development follows a pattern that is maintained throughout social class and culture. Specifically, dysfunctional parenting styles (e.g., excessively controlling or permissive) will lead to inadequate emotional development in children, which in turn will cause difficulties in psychosocial relationships regardless of the developmental context. The degrees of control, negligence, or acceptance that parents exercise can vary based on the context and what is perceived as acceptance or rejection. Another study (Richaud et al., 2013a) examined whether the parenting styles of participants living in poverty influenced children’s socio-emotional functioning and their stress coping mechanisms differently across two cultures. The results indicated that parenting styles differed by group. The Argentine group showed medium-low parental acceptance and medium pathological control values but higher than those of acceptance. Furthermore, this group showed a significantly higher level of negligence (i.e., a parenting style with rejection characteristics) than the Spanish sample (Richaud de Minzi, et al., 2013b). The Spanish children perceived medium-high acceptance, which was significantly higher than that of the Argentine group; however, Spanish maternal pathological control was significantly higher but still with a medium effect size. Finally, the Spanish groups showed significantly less negligence than the Argentine group. This profile would be classified as an authoritarian parenting style. Concerning whether parenting styles develop healthy children in each context, the results indicated that Argentine children (whose parents were less accepting and controlling but more negligent) have fewer prosocial qualities and adopt less efficient coping strategies compared with Spanish children (Richaud et al., 2013a). Furthermore, Argentine children greatly lack emotional control and use avoidant strategies, which involves greater emotional conflict. The Spanish children (whose parents practiced an authoritarian style with high levels of acceptance) showed slightly more social ability, efficient coping strategies, emotional control, and strategies focused on problem-solving than the Argentine group (Richaud et al., 2013a). Even in the case of Argentine and Spanish contexts, which have several common elements, culture influences parenting style. Although the control style of the Spanish sample was somewhat inadequate, the parents’ acceptance favored children’s socio-emotional development. The low levels of prosocial behaviors achieved suggest that parents negatively affected their children, and low acceptance and

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negligence were related to greater developmental problems. The same was found for middle-class children who perceived their parents’ negative practices, such as excessive control and extreme permissiveness, as negligence and ignorance about meeting their needs. These perceptions negatively affected the children’s development, leading in part to conduct problems and aggressiveness. Thus, authoritative parenting remains the most efficient style (Gámez-Guadix et al., 2010; Richaud de Minzi, 2005, 2010b; Richaud de Minzi et al., 2005, 2013b) Therefore, the typical parenting style within a culture might not be ideal for healthy child development. In summary, parenting styles can vary by culture, but the relationships between the characteristics of these styles and child development do not (Richaud et al., 2013a).

Parenting Competence in Argentine Culture In recent years, the study of parenting competence has gained more relevance both in Spain and Latin American countries (Vargas-Rubilar & Richaud, 2018). Much research on this issue has been developed from the positive parenting approach. In this regard, positive parenting is characterized by parenting practices aimed at promoting healthy family relationships and optimizing children’s development and wellbeing (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2020). Thus, competent or adequate parenting requires the balanced combination of various essential components, such as secure attachment, empathy, protection, communication, expression of affection, positive discipline, and autonomy granted to children at different stages of their life cycle (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2020). Based on concepts proposed by Waters and Sroufe (1983) and Masten and Curtis (2000), parental competence could be defined as the set of skills that enable parents to flexibly and adaptively face the vital task of being parents according to their children’s developmental and educational needs. Following this theoretical approach, parental competence would result from the combination of families’ psychosocial living conditions, the educational setting that parents or caregivers construct to address their vital task, and their children’s individual characteristics (Martin et al., 2013). Likewise, Glăveanu & Creangă (2009) define parental competence as a system of knowledge, attitudes, capabilities, and habits that enable the parents or caregivers to successfully meet their parental responsibility, and also to prevent and deal with critical situations to contribute to their children’s development. However, research on parental competence should not be reduced to its theoretical conceptualization, for their relevance lies in the role these have for the socioemotional and cognitive development of children and adolescents (Vargas-Rubilar & Arán-Filippetti, 2014; Vargas-Rubilar & Richaud, 2018). Particularly in Argentina, research on this subject has been limited because of the lack of psychometric instruments for its measurement. Hence, we decided to conduct the validation of two scales, to assess the parental competence from fathers, mothers, or caregivers’ perspectives. First, we carried out the Argentine validation of the

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Scale of Perceived Parental Competence (SPPC) of Bayot and Hernández (2008). These authors defined perceived parental competence as the self-perceived ability of parents to address their children’s nurturing. The study showed an adequate psychometric performance of the SPPC to assess four areas of perceived parental competence: (a) school involvement, (b) time dedication and advice, (c) shared leisure, and (d) assumption of a parental role (see Azar et al., 2019). In this regard, a recent study (Azar, 2021) found significant differences in perceived parental competence, according to social class. Argentine middle-class parents reported themselves as more involved in their children’s education process (e.g., I ask the teacher about my children’s progress at school) and with greater time dedication and guidance to their children (e.g., During the day, I spend time talking with my children). In addition, they reported sharing more recreational moments with their children (e.g., I head out for short walks in the family to squares, parks, cinemas, museums, zoos, etc.) and greater assumption of their parental role (e.g., At home, I encourage everyone to express their opinions). Conversely, low socioeconomic class parents perceived themselves as less competent regarding school involvement, time dedication and guidance, shared leisure, and parental role assumption. These results are aligned to previously mentioned studies, which have found significant differences in parenting styles depending on the socio-economic class of Argentine parents or caregivers (Vargas-Rubilar & Lemos, 2011). Furthermore, we validated and abbreviated the Positive Parenting Scale (E2p) by Gómez and Muñoz (2014) (See Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2020). This scale is based on four interconnected theoretical approaches: positive parenting (Rodrigo et al., 2015), the ecosystem theory of human development (Bronfenbrenner, 1987), attachment theory (Bowlby, 1969), and family resilience theory (Walsh, 2004). According to Gomez and Muñoz (2014), parental competencies are the set of associated, formative, protective, and reflective skills, attitudes, and nurturing practices, which become learned and updated from one’s own family history and the opportunities parenting ecology offered (Gómez & Muñoz, 2014). The Argentine abbreviated version of the E2p showed adequate psychometric properties to assess parents’ perspective regarding their own bonding, formative, protective, and reflective competencies, which become core capabilities to meet positive parenting (Gómez & Muñoz, 2014; Sanders & Mazzucchelli, 2018; Sanders & Turner, 2018). The design and validation of instruments to assess this construct will enable the development of further relevant research on the role that parenting competencies have on the socio-emotional and cognitive development of Argentine children and adolescents. In this sense, some scales assessing this construct from the children’s perspective are currently under development.

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Intervention Possibilities and Research Implications The studies presented suggest that the interactions between parents and children should be considered across diverse cultural and social groups (Bornstein & Bornstein, 2010). This information will allow all types of families to benefit, especially if the research is used by government- or private-provided services that are psychosocial, communal, or both. Based on specific living conditions, certain authors assert that the activation of certain parenting competencies that permit the parents to resist adversity and provide children with better development opportunities is unavoidable (Barudy & Dantagnan, 2005). Future interventions must be based on general psychological theory regardless of culture. However, these interventions must account for particular cultural characteristics about strategies and specific activities. For instance, feelings of parental acceptance always have positive implications for children; however, researchers must be careful given that parental vigilance can be interpreted as acceptance in one culture (or subculture) but intrusion in another. There is a great need for intervention programs to focus on strengthening parenting in socially vulnerable contexts, particularly social risk contexts due to poverty in Argentina. To date, the attempts to repair the profound psychological and social deficiencies of families, especially about parenting styles, have been insufficient. However, interventions are also important for middle- and upper-middle-class groups who favor the accumulation of material goods and present the risk of transforming parent-child relationships into mere formalities, thereby depriving children of affection and the parental presence necessary for an adequate socioemotional development (Barudy & Dantagnan, 2010), as has been the case in Argentina in recent years. Usually, parents are held responsible for risk prevention and provision of opportunities for better socio-emotional, cognitive and physical development of their children. However, it is also important to promote parents’ development, mainly to ensure a better future for the following generations. “Broken homes” without defined roles, the lack of norms on an educational level, couple conflicts, personal and family dissatisfaction, social and cultural inequalities, and the violent experiences lived by many parents during their own childhood, among other factors, may predetermine or harm the possibility of providing an adequate parenting environment (Cirillo, 2013). For this reason, we consider it essential to develop family care and parental strengthening programs to provide formal support to parents, further enabling them to optimize their children’s nurturing. The approaches that seek to increase sensitivity and parental competencies and to provide relevant information regarding child development (i.e., psychoeducation) allow parents to perceive their child in a manner that is less distorted by their own beliefs and family history and thus facilitate child, parental, and family resilience (Vargas-Rubilar, 2011). This type of intervention has also proven to reinforce sensitive behaviors, model adequate parental behaviors, and provide parental social support in other Latin American countries (Barudy & Dantagnan, 2005, 2010; Gómez & Kotliarenco, 2010). Many of

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the intervention programs directed toward parents who are affected by poverty, low socio-economic levels, unstable living conditions, and a lack of education and social support showed significant improvements months after the intervention (Juffer et al., 2005; Gómez et al., 2008). The construction of effective family intervention programs for people from diverse cultures depends on an adequate theoretical foundation and an appropriate evaluation of the target population (i.e., instruments must be adapted to certain populations). If these fundamental factors align with the objectives, techniques, strategies, and modalities of the proposed intervention, then the program can ensure better results for the people involved (Vargas-Rubilar & Oros, 2011).

Program of Parental Strengthening in Contexts of Social Vulnerability In Argentina, we designed and implemented a Parental Strengthening Program called A Bridge between the Family and the School (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2017), within school settings in contexts of social vulnerability. This program was based on the positive parenting approach, including elements of educational and community intervention models. It was conducted in groups, using 30 expository/participatory meetings. These parental strengthening meetings were intended as spaces for the exchange of knowledge and experiences between professionals and parents. The intervention turned on two main issues: (a) direct intervention for parents: promoting parental skills (i.e., secure attachment, parental empathy, authoritative parenting style, positive communication, and support networks) and (b) indirect intervention for children: providing parents strategies to help their children to develop their own socio-emotional resources (e.g., self-esteem, positive emotions, prosocial behavior, social skills, etc.) (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2017). To assess the efficacy of the program we used a mixed study (qualitative and quantitative) with the participation of 60 children and 60 mothers (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2018). To study the indirect effect of the intervention on children’s perception of parenting (parenting style and attachment), a quantitative “before-after” study with a control group was used. The findings showed that the children’s perception of attachment and parenting style was better after the intervention with the mothers, and higher than that observed in the control group without intervention. Furthermore, after the intervention, semi-structured interviews were conducted with the mothers. The results showed that, according to that reported by participants, the workshops provided new meaningful information that contributed to their personal growth and parental sensitivity, further stimulating positive changes in beliefs about parenting. In addition, the mothers perceived an improvement in their expression of affection, verbal communication, and discipline. It also implied an important source of social support, activating their interest in their children’s school situation, consequently improving, in some cases, the communication between mothers and the school (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2018).

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Based on our experience, parental intervention programs should consider both the needs of parents and their children. For instance, among other issues, there is a need to promote parental self-care and self-efficacy, the psychotherapy regarding parents’ own parenting history and the reflection on their current parental role, considering also the time spent in family activities and the search for formal and informal social support. Finally, although our research was conducted within contexts of social vulnerability, there remains the need to design and implement parental support programs in other contexts or socio-economic strata, namely, parents of rural populations, middle and high socioeconomic classes, and populations at social risk in large cities (e.g., Buenos Aires). These interventions should have a prior diagnosis enabling an adaptation to the specific needs of each social group. Thus, the approach to highrisk families (i.e., with multiple problems) should articulate a broader and interdisciplinary approach. For instance, families with consumption of addictive substances, parental mental illnesses, parental abandonment, or domestic violence should have specialized interventions and greater monitoring and follow-up to maintain changes (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2017). Furthermore, even though our intervention and evaluation proposal was only conducted within the school setting, it could be adapted to other areas of intervention (e.g., family intervention centers, health centers, children’s hospitals, etc.) also bringing substantial benefits to these issues.

Parenting and Pandemic in Argentina A few days after March 11, 2020, the date on which the World Health Organization stated the SARS-CoV-2 (COVID-19) outbreak as a global pandemic, the Argentine government ordered mandatory social isolation to prevent contagion and consequent spread of the virus. This isolation lasted from the end of March to December 2020. During this period, there was a decision of general school closure and so virtual classes were conducted. This context had an emotional (Canet-Juric et al., 2020) and economic impact on the general population (Ernst & López Mourelo, 2020), particularly on many teachers who revealed symptoms of stress and burnout (VargasRubilar & Oros, 2021). Many parents also felt anxious, overwhelmed, and stressed (Almeida et al., 2020; Brown et al., 2020; Roos et al., 2021; Olhaberry et al., 2021), partly due to the changes involved in online education, and the adaptation to a new family and work routines (e.g., homeworking) (Almeida et al., 2020; Cluver et al., 2020; UNICEF, 2020). Various recent studies (e.g., Brown et al., 2020; Griffith, 2020; Roos et al., 2021) have warned about the possible negative impact of the pandemic on children and their families in the medium to long term. In research we conducted at the beginning of the compulsory quarantine (VargasRubilar et al., 2022), which included 646 mothers of school-age children in Argentina, we assessed the changes they perceived in some of their children’s behaviors since the start of the COVID-19 isolation. 56.2% of the mothers reported sleep difficulties in their children (i.e., bedtime resistance, delayed sleep) and 50.3%

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changes in appetite and eating habits. In turn, 48.5% of the mothers perceived their children as being sadder and lonely, 54.2% noticed greater disobedience, and 42.9% reported more fights among siblings. Finally, 65.8% perceived them to be more anxious or nervous, 46% reported more dependent behaviors, and 58.4% more oppositional and defiant ones. In this line, another study also conducted in Argentina (Cabaña et al., 2021) including 4500 Argentine children and adolescents found that 77% of the sample felt “angry” and 68% had different degrees of sadness; 7 out of 10 children and adolescents (6 to 18 years old) reported negative feelings such as low interest and boredom, and 6 out of 10 recognized being afraid, either for themselves (24%) or for others (21%). Regarding activities carried out before the quarantine, 60% of the children reported missing out-of-home activities, general leisure activities, and sports, as well as contact with families and friends (Cabana et al., 2021). These feelings can easily reflect the Argentine culture, where face-to-face relationships are highly valued, kisses and hugs among friends and family members are common, and grandparents are very important in family life (Richaud et al., 2014). In our study, we also evaluated mother’s perception on three parenting dimensions (positive parenting, parental stress, and school support), and how these determined mothers’ perception of their children’s changes in behaviors (e.g., in sleep, appetite, mood, obedience, fighting with siblings, participation and attitude towards online classes, etc.) after the pandemic (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2022). Based on the results, we noticed that the aforementioned parenting dimensions influenced the perceived children’s behavior. Mothers with low positive parenting reported their children to yell more, have more fights with siblings, be more anxious and disobedient, and show more defiant and dependent behaviors. Mothers with greater parental stress perceived more negative changes in almost all the behaviors assessed. Likewise, they also noticed more internalizing behaviors in their children, such as greater sadness and regressive behaviors, compared to less stressed mothers. Mothers who reported providing more school support to their children perceived that their children adjusted better to online classes, consistently completing their assignments, enjoying their classes, and being less frustrated when doing schoolwork at home. Parents’ thoughts, beliefs, and expectations about their children and their own parenting history are central to parent-child interactions, which in turn influence children’s behavior (Johnston et al., 2018). The reciprocal nature of these interaction processes implies the fact that parents may also be influenced by their children’s attitudes and behaviors (Biglan, 2015). For instance, more irritable children or those with sleep or behavior problems could elicit more negative parents’ reactions (McQuillan & Bates, 2017). In this sense, considering the reciprocal effect that in turn children’s behavior could have on the parental stress perception, we also analyzed the differences in parental stress among parents who reported that their child’s behavior changed or remained stable during the pandemic. Ten out of the twelve behaviors assessed (83.3%), revealed significant differences in parental stress, showing higher levels of stress in mothers who perceived changes in their children’s behavior (Vargas-Rubilar et al., unpublished a). Indeed, the accumulation of stressors negatively impacted parents’ behavior, which in turn would lead to

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greater irritability and behavioral problems in children, thus provoking more negative responses from their parents (McQuillan & Bates, 2017). According to a study conducted by UNICEF (2020), the pandemic seems to have had a more negative impact, especially on mothers’ nurturing. 51% of women interviewed reported feeling more overburdened by household chores (i.e., childcare, shopping, etc.) during social isolation. The causes of overload were cleaning the house (32%), burden of care (28%), cooking (20%), and homework assistance (22%). In turn, 4% of women reported a greater workload. To compare this impact between fathers and mothers in Argentina during the pandemic, in our research we selected a subsample of 50 mothers, including the assessment of 49 fathers. The results indicated that the mothers presented significantly higher parental stress and perceived that they had to provide more school support compared to the fathers (Vargas-Rubilar et al., unpublished b). Consistent with these results, Almeida et al. (2020) mention that mothers have borne a greater unpaid workload, adding multitasking demands regarding their jobs, housework, and child care, especially in Latin American cultures (Almeida et al., 2020). In addition, some parents’ socio-demographic and occupational characteristics could affect parenting. For example, a study with Spanish parents showed that those having many children experienced greater parental stress (Pérez et al., 2010), as well as those who had more working hours, especially without enough social support (Hughes & Parkes, 2007). Mothers’ age also seems to be related to parenting styles. Some studies of young mothers (under 21 years of age at delivery) suggest that many of them are not sufficiently prepared to provide sensitive and positive parenting (Easterbrooks et al., 2011). Another study indicates that parents between 30 and 40 years old are more likely to adequately meet their children’s needs (e.g, Bezeveggis, 2012). Thus, we also included these variables in our study (perceived parenting, mothers’ age, number of children, and number of working hours) to assess their dynamics in the context of the COVID pandemic in Argentina. The results we obtained indicated that the number of children and the age of the mothers had a significant impact on parenting. Consistent with the aforementioned studies, mothers who had three or more children presented higher values of parental stress than those with one or two children, who were also able to provide more school support than parents with three or more. Although the number of children could be considered a stressor before the pandemic, this factor could increase the stress of mothers who have to attend to the needs of several children at the same time, in a context of greater home demands. Mothers’ age only had an impact on the perception of parental stress. Younger mothers (22–34 years old) reported higher parental stress than mothers older than 35 years of age. In this vein, Bezeveggis (2012) argued that mothers over 30 years old adapt better and are happier in their motherhood (Bezeveggis, 2012) than younger ones, who have more difficulties in carrying out positive parenting (Easterbrooks et al., 2011). This situation could also be a pre-pandemic variable influencing maternal stress. Likewise, the number of working hours only had a significant effect when interacting with the number of children, thus showing greater parental stress for those mothers who worked more than 10 hours and had 3 or more children (Vargas-Rubilar et al., 2022).

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As already mentioned, COVID-19 has affected many families’ integral health. It is estimated that its impact on parents’ and children’s physical and psychological health will continue even after the health crisis. In this regard, our results (VargasRubilar et al., 2022) and those reported by previous works (e.g., Roos et al., 2021) show the need to develop psychosocial intervention programs to provide professional support to parents during and after the COVID-19 pandemic. Specifically, group and individual psychological approaches aimed at promoting and strengthening positive parenting practices (i.e., healthy, protective, and stable affective relationships, adequate expressions of affection and positive discipline, promotion of leisure activities, and quality time to children) are suggested. Additionally, parents should be provided with effective strategies for parental stress management, to prevent children’s verbal, physical and emotional abuse.

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Vargas-Rubilar, J., & Oros, L. (2011). Parentalidad y Autoestima de los hijos: Una revisión sobre la importancia del fortalecimiento familiar para el desarrollo infantil positivo. Revista Apuntes Universitarios, 1(1), 155–171. Vargas-Rubilar, N., & Oros, L. B. (2021). Stress and burnout in teachers during times of pandemic. Frontiers in Psychology, 12, 756007. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.756007 Vargas-Rubilar, J., Lemos, V., & Richaud, M. C. (2017). Programa de fortalecimiento parental en contextos de vulnerabilidad social: una propuesta desde el ámbito escolar. Interdisciplinaria, 34(1), 157–172. Vargas-Rubilar, J., Richaud, M. C., & Oros, L. (2018). Programa de promoción de la parentalidad positiva en la escuela: un estudio preliminar en un contexto de vulnerabilidad social [Program to promote positive parenting at school: a preliminary study in a context of social vulnerability]. Pensando Psicología, 14(23), 1–15. Vargas-Rubilar, J., & Richaud, M. C. (2018). Childhood parenting: Main approaches and aspects analyzed from psychology. In C. García (Ed.), Research on Hispanic psychology (Vol. 1, pp. 241–276). Nova Science Publishers, Inc. Vargas-Rubilar, J., Lemos, V. N., & Richaud, M. C. (2020). Adaptación y validación argentina de una versión breve de la Escala de Parentalidad Positiva (E2p). Liberabit, 26(2), 1–17. Vargas-Rubilar, J., Richaud, M. C., Lemos, V. N., & Balabanian, C. (2022). Parenting and Children’s behavior during the COVID-19 pandemic: Mother’s perspective. Frontiers in Psychology 13, 801614. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.801614 Vargas-Rubilar, J., Lemos, V., Balabanian, C., & Richaud, M. C. (unpublished a). Cambios en la conducta de los hijos y estrés parental percibidos por las madres durante la pandemia. Vargas-Rubilar, J., Lemos, V., Balabanian, C., & Richaud, M. C. (unpublished b). Parentalidad y conducta de los hijos percibida en tiempos de COVID-19: comparación entre padres y madres. Walsh, F. (2004). Resiliencia familiar: estrategias para su fortalecimiento. Amorrortu. Waters, E., & Sroufe, L. A. (1983). Social competence as a developmental construct. Developmental Review, 3(1), 79–97.

María Cristina Richaud [[email protected]] is a psychologist, with a Ph.D. from the University of Buenos Aires. She is a Higher (Superior) researcher at the Consejo Nacional de Investigaciones Científicas y Técnicas (CONICET) in the Insituto de Ciencias para la Familia, Universidad Austral, and Scientific Advisor in the Centro Interdisciplinario de Investigaciones en Ciencias de la Salud y del Comportamiento (CIICSAC), Universidad Adventista del Plata. She is a Director of Master in Intervention in Vulnerable populations at the Universidad Austral. Jael Vargas-Rubilar [[email protected]] is a psychologist, with a Ph.D. from the Argentine Catholic University. She is an Associate Researcher at (CONICET) and Centro Interdisciplinario de Investigaciones en Ciencias de la Salud y del Comportamiento (CIICSAC), Universidad Adventista del Plata (UAP). She teaches Undergraduates and postgraduates in the areas of Methodology and Family intervention. Viviana Lemos [[email protected]] is a psychologist, with a Ph.D. from the University of San Luis, Argentina. She is an Principal Researcher at the Consejo Nacional de Investigaciones Científicas y Técnicas (CONICET) and Director of the Centro Interdisciplinario de Investigaciones en Ciencias de la Salud y del Comportamiento (CIICSAC), Universidad Adventista del Plata (UAP). She teaches Undergraduates and postgraduates in the areas of Research Methodology and Psychometrics.

Childrearing in Japan Ayumi Nagase and Susan D. Holloway

Introduction: Wanted! More Japanese Babies In 2020, Japanese women’s fertility rate plunged to 1.34, making Japan one of the least fertile countries in the world (Ministry of Health, Labour, and Welfare, 2022). This trend may be partly due to the COVID-19 pandemic, which has depressed fertility in nations around the world. Yet, with fewer and fewer employed adults available to replace those that retire, the Japanese economy is at risk. For instance, a 2018 report from the International Monetary Fund (IMF) concluded that Japan will reduce its GDP by over 25% in the next 40 years unless it can adopt fundamental solutions to the problem of low fertility (Colacelli & Fernandez Corugedo, 2018). This crisis has resulted in a plethora of commissioned surveys, studies, and white papers—all designed to offer solutions for remedying this urgent situation (Batteman, 2022; Fujii & Nakata, 2021). The Ikumen boom is one example that has gained popularity in Japan (Mizukoshi et al., 2016). Ikumen, a combination of the Japanese term ikuji (childrearing) and the English word men, refers to fathers actively engaged in childrearing. Since the term was coined in 2010, the Japanese government and an NPO, Fathering Japan, have been advocating for men’s active participation in childcare and family life (Rudiono & Prakoso, 2022; Shatil, 2010). This government-led Ikumen Project was designed to achieve gender equity at home, and to aim for a dramatic departure from the “traditional” portrait of a family with a workaholic man and a full-time mother. Nevertheless, there is little evidence that such changes are near at hand. Family formation decisions – not marrying or marrying late – are certainly correlated with

A. Nagase (*) Sonoma State University, Rohnert Park, CA, USA e-mail: [email protected] S. D. Holloway Graduate School, University of California, Berkeley, Berkeley, CA, USA © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_8

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the decline in birth rate. And they are also associated with other factors, including the bumpy progress of the gender equity “revolution” and the sharp increase in the number of younger adults without access to permanent jobs due to Japan’s turbulent labor market (Atoh, 2017; Okui & Nakashima, 2022). How did a country that achieved a transition to a robust economy and highly educated citizenry in the space of several decades just 50 years ago come to the point where its social foundations are under so much strain? In this chapter, we focus on the family and childrearing from two perspectives. First, to shed light on the role of political and social institutions in defining motherhood and fatherhood, we offer a historical overview of the structure and function of the family in Japan. In particular, we outline the sharp pivot during the 1950s and 1960s in women’s role from wage earner and civic participant to full-time household and childrearing manager. We then shift to offer a sociocultural perspective on childrearing, describing the collective representations – or cultural models –that Japanese parents draw from as they raise their children. We offer a review of the classic studies from the 1960s and beyond, identifying changes as well as continuities in Japanese childrearing goals and methods. Of particular interest is how culturally constructed norms of parenting have narrowed men’s engagement in family life (Super & Harkness, 1997). We conclude with a discussion, again using a gender equity lens, of those family policy reforms that promise to be effective and transformative in contemporary Japan.

History: Families and Child Rearing in Japan Japan is an archipelago consisting primarily of four mountainous islands. Throughout Japan’s history, periods of cultural exchange and imperialist expansion have alternated with periods of relative isolation from other Asian countries and those in the West (see Uno, 1999, Kayama, 2010, for an overview of Japanese family history). As early as the sixth century, contacts with Korea and China resulted in the introduction of Buddhism to Japan, which co-exists today along with Japanese Shinto beliefs. By the eighth century, Japan had developed into a state governed by an imperial court with a distinctive indigenous culture. Centuries of strife among feudal lords (samurai) came to an end in the early 1600s, when the country was united under the rule of a particularly powerful shogun, or military ruler. The subsequent 250 years were characterized by isolation from all forms of foreign exchange. The Edo era (1603–1867) was a largely prosperous and peaceful period in which a shogun ruled over a feudal system of clans headed by samurai. Family life among the wealthier classes took the form of an extended household (ie), which included the head of the family along with his wife, children, parents as well as other relatives, servants, lodgers, and apprentices. The family was considered primarily an economic unit as well as a means of maintaining hereditary continuity by honoring ancestors and producing descendants. Husbands and wives were not viewed as being romantic partners, and typically marriages were arranged in support of the economic

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position and social status of the ie. In this system, young married women in wealthy households were expected to take care of their husbands and mothers-in-law, but not engage in the exclusive care of their children, who were considered to belong to the ie not to the parents. Fathers were expected to take responsibility for training and educating their children, particularly the boys (Azuma, 1986). In families of more humble means, childrearing was a community-based enterprise in which childcare was distributed not only across members of the immediate family but also across inhabitants of the village (Imano, 1988). Thus, the cultural model of intensive mothering, prominent in contemporary Japan, is not a culturally-driven tradition, as some might think, but is rather a departure from the norms that held sway in Japan in previous centuries. The end of Japan’s isolation can be traced to 1853, when the American navy commander Matthew Perry forced the country to open its ports to foreign trade. Japanese leaders began to make a transition to a government characterized by a modern unified state under the rule of the emperor. During the Meiji period, which ended in 1912, the country experienced significant social, political, and economic change. During this period government leaders endorsed the ie structure, viewing it as an effective metaphor to illustrate the importance of the “family state” under the emperorship. Women were expected to engage in civic activities and to take on employment, with childrearing largely left to older relatives and servants. From the end of the Meiji period until the beginning of the second world war in 1941, Japan’s government, inspired by Western values of family life and childrearing, set about redefining the role of the family in civic society. Fathers were increasingly characterized in terms of their ability to support the family financially, and mothers as those who performed the caring and domestic work. The phrase good wives, wise mothers (ryousai kenbo) was coined in the late nineteenth century, recasting women’s position as one of family care rather than broader social engagement (Kojima, 1996; Kayama, 2010). These leaders endorsed the notion of “home” as a vital educational and developmental environment for children, with the modern housewife at its center (Sand, 2003). For working class women, this goal was not financially feasible, and many worked to support their families. Women’s labor became even more critical with the escalation of World War II, which took many men to the front lines. In addition to engaging in wage labor, mothers were expected to take full responsibility for taking care of family matters, with fathers playing the role of the strict and emotionally disengaged patriarch (Fukaya, 2008; Kashiwagi, 2008). After the war ended in 1945, the polarization in men’s and women’s responsibility in family life grew even more pronounced. As Japan’s economic base shifted from agriculture to the manufacturing and service industries, its infrastructure heavily depended on a reliable workforce of male full-time employees. Women were expected to support men’s involvement in the workforce by managing all aspects of home life, as well as supervising the education of their children so that these future workers could eventually participate successfully in the modern economy (Fukaya, 2008). They were also viewed solely as a convenient and inexpensive source of temporary labor to be hired or fired in the interest of corporate profit. These

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new constraints on women’s independence were ironic given the fact that suffrage was granted to women for the first time in Japan’s history in 1945 (Kayama, 2010). In the decades from the 1950s to 1970s, Japan continued its rapid economic growth and became one of the most affluent nations in the world. During this period the constraints on women’s roles became even more pronounced. In the early 1960s, Prime Minister Hayato Ikeda and his cabinet introduced various policies to define women’s role exclusively as that of homemaker. In this political discourse, inaccurate interpretations of research on child development were used to persuade the public that mothers’ full-time engagement in childrearing was essential to avoid developmental delays, academic failure, and mental health crises. The essence of their argument was that women must remain exclusively at home if they want their children to be successful (Fujisaki & Ohinata, 2010; Kashiwagi, 2008). To spread this ideology of motherhood among the population, government agencies and the mass media ran a series of campaigns pitching highly nostalgic and ideologized images of hardworking, self-sacrificing mothers (Kayama, 2010). For instance, in the mid-1950s the government promoted a popular song called Kaasan no uta [Song of a Mom] whose lyrics describe a mother in the countryside who stays up throughout the freezing cold night to knit a pair of mittens made from home-spun hemp for her grown child who is working in the city. As schooling became a sorting mechanism to select highly productive workers in this period, mothers were asked to assume sole responsibility for supervising children’s study at home and at test preparation schools (Allison, 1991, 1996). Into the 1970s these pressures on women made it extremely challenging for them to pursue their full-time employment. By the 1980s, however, the economy was booming, and young women were increasingly likely to pursue higher education. A relatively high percentage expressed a desire to remain employed even after they married and had children (Kashiwagi, 2008). However, this trend toward gender-role parity began to erode when the Japanese economic bubble burst in 1991, causing a sense of malaise and anxiety about the nation’s future. Japan’s stock market plummeted and the period of post-War prosperity appeared to be over. At about the same time, Japan’s Total Fertility Rate (TFR) also plunged to 1.57, the lowest rate ever in its history and well below the rate of 4.5 registered in 1945. In 1994, the number of people aged 65 or older exceeded the number of those aged 14 or younger, prompting the government to describe Japan as a shoushi koureika shakai, [an aging society with a declining birthdate]. The combination of low fertility and a high life expectancy, raised fears of an insufficiently large workforce to support the economy and ensure the welfare of the aging population. In the same year, the government implemented the “Angel Plan” to tackle the declining fertility rate, especially addressing the work-family balance for parents who raise babies and children. A myriad of initiatives was developed under this plan, with an emphasis on five goals: 1) support for maintaining a sustainable balance between work and childrearing for mothers and fathers (e.g., building more childcare facilities for infants and toddlers), 2) resources and support for childrearing at home (e.g., facilitation of local childrearing networks across regions to support families with young children), 3) development of housing and other infrastructure (e.g.,

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parks, libraries), 4) funding for school and community enrichment activities (e.g., sports, cultural events, volunteer experiences), and 5) development of policies to ease the financial burden related to childrearing (National Institute of Population and Social Security Research, 1997). The plan was subsequently revised in 1999 to address critics’ contention that the original plan was largely symbolic and contained few concrete initiatives. However, researchers and family policy analysts indicate that the revised Angel Plan did not achieve its goals (Fujisaki & Ohinata, 2010) and the society remained sharply divided over its attempt to promote gender equality. Left-leaning Japanese analysts continued to argue that greater gender equality at home and in the workplace could address the fertility crisis, while conservatives persisted in an attempt to revive the elusive “traditional Japanese family,” blaming women who wanted to work outside the home for being self-centered (Honda, 2008; Shirahase, 2007). In the midst of this political divide, the birth rate continued to drop, reaching another record low of 1.26 in 2005 (Ministry of Health, Labor and Welfare, 2008). Driven by persistent economic losses, the Japanese government has continued to promote a series of policies, laws, and initiatives designed to address the falling birthrate (Cabinet Office, 2019). One group of measures is directed at creating a more supportive Early Care and Education (ECE) infrastructure in each municipality across Japan, including the Basic Law for Countermeasures against Declining Birthrate (2003), the New Vision for Children and Parenting (Kodomo Kosodate Vision) (2009), and the Child Welfare Act (2012, revised in 2016). These initiatives allocate national funds to establish more childcare programs for child(ren) aged 0 to 6 years old and to expand government-run ECE programs for low-income families offering extended hours and care for sick children. Also, public funding was increased to better support fertility and prenatal services. The second group of initiatives addressed employment conditions in terms of support for working parents. For instance, Japan passed the Convention on Work and Family balance in 2007 and other measures to circumvent long working hours and discrimination against workers with family responsibilities (Cabinet Office, 2019). These bills facilitated collaboration between the private and public sector to move away from guaranteed lifetime employment in a single institution toward a merit-based system in which tenure is based on productivity. This effort may create more opportunities for women, whose employment is more likely to be intermittent if they take time off work to bear and care for children (Rosenbluth, 2007; Batteman, 2022). These initiatives reflect the government’s view that childrearing is not just a mother’s responsibility but one that should be borne by communities, agencies, and society (Ministry of Health, Labor and Welfare, 2011). Nevertheless, it remains unknown whether Japan’s family policies and bills will boost the fertility rate any time soon. First, the burden of childrearing remains very heavy on families, primarily because there are not yet enough social support systems available. The emotional burden of childrearing on families is indicated by the rising number of reported child abuse/maltreatment cases, which exceeded 100,000 in 2020 after exponentially increasing every year since 2004 (Machida, 2021). Moreover, there is still a

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significant gap in hours spent on childrearing between women and men. According to a survey conducted by the Tokyo Metropolitan Government in 2021 on 5000 adult participants, women reported that they spent 8 h 54 min for childrearing and house chores, as opposed to 5 h and 20 min for men (Kawaguchi, 2022). This report suggests that Japanese women still bear the most responsibility for the child and household care. Second, Japan’s employment conventions and laws still lack flexibility, causing significant challenges to employees’ career promotion and job security when they seek to balance work and family (e.g., by working shorter hours or taking family leave). Although there has been a slight increase in the number of men who take parental leave or even leave their jobs permanently to care for family members, in most workplaces male employees are not fully encouraged to meet both work and family responsibilities (Otsuka et al., 2021). Without drastic reforms of hiring and retention practices and incentives to change the policies, many employees with family responsibilities will remain relatively powerless in deciding the amount, scheduling, location, and nature of their work. Third, policy analysts argue that interagency collaboration is crucial to providing families with social and financial support that is comprehensive and sustainable. The current administration is aiming to pass a new bill that establishes a new public agency, the “Child and Family Agency” under the Cabinet Office, with the goal of beginning service in early 2023 (Cabinet Secretariat, 2022). There have been positive public reactions to this bipartisan effort to address Japan’s sluggish response to the low fertility rate and child welfare in a more coherent system under a single agency (Nikkei Digital, 2022). Nevertheless, it is yet unclear exactly what this new agency is tasked with, what kinds of programs they will develop to promote children’s development and family wellbeing, and whether the scope of the agency’s responsibilities will overlap with that of existing agencies such as Ministry of Health, Labour, and Welfare. In the next section, we turn to an examination of Japanese parents’ socialization and education of their young children. Our primary focus is on the collective representations—or cultural models—of family life that are available to parents in Japan.

Japanese Childrearing: Then and Now In any community, adults have certain beliefs about what it means to be a good person. Parents typically intend to help children develop the attributes of a good person, as conceptualized within their community. To do so, they draw on collective representations, or cultural models of childrearing (Quinn & Holland, 1987; Super & Harkness, 1997). As more parenting research is conducted on diverse cultures and cross-culturally, researchers are using the notion of cultural models as a conceptual lens to understand beliefs and practices that may be passed down from one generation to the next. Some of these beliefs and practices may also be altered or discarded

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when parents’ circumstances change, calling for new approaches (Gjerde, 2004; Vazsonyi et al., 2021). These studies shed light on ways in which cultural models are adapted or contested, as well as ways in which they are adopted (Holloway, 2000). In the case of Japan, there may be more homogeneity in their cultural models of childrearing than in most countries, due to its long history of restrictive immigration policies. However, change and contestation are present to some degree in any vibrant society (Holloway, 2010). To understand how Japanese children are socialized, it is useful to know how parents view the basic nature of the child. Some research in this area connects societal views about human nature to the religious or philosophical traditions predominant in a particular community (LeVine et al., 1994). This school of thought points out that in the United States, for example, it is possible to trace parents’ use of corporal punishment to Calvinism and its focus on the notion of original sin. Parents who believe that children are innately predisposed to having a sinful nature may think that children need strict discipline to “beat the Devil out of them” (Jolivet, 1997). In contrast to this forbidding vision of human nature, the Confucian ideology that has deeply affected Japanese society emphasizes the essential moral rectitude of the child. Parents who have been raised with these Confucian beliefs may seek to nurture these qualities and protect children from the corrupting influence of civilization (Kojima, 1986; Yamamura, 1986). This benign view of the child could be compatible with the Japanese acceptance of children’s dependence on indulgent care from their mothers, a relationship dynamic referred to as amae (Behrens, 2004). Psychiatrist Takeo Doi (2002/1973) first brought the notion of amae to the attention of Japanese and Western observers, characterizing it as the primary dynamic operating in the Japanese mother-infant relationship which in turn serves as a prototype for subsequent relationships later in life (e.g., the relationship of employee and employer). According to Doi, the need to receive and to give this type of nurturance is not necessarily a sign of immaturity or self-indulgence. Doi’s construal of amae has contributed to socialization research in articulating distinctive perceptions of the nature of social relations in Japan (Borovoy, 2005). Studies conducted in the 1960s and the 1970s suggested that this close, nurturing bond between mother and child was achieved in part by maintaining physical proximity (sometimes referred to in Japan as “skinship”) with the infant (Caudill & Plath, 1966). In those days, Japanese mothers most often carried their babies in slings or backpacks (although they are now more likely to make use of strollers). Some of the older comparative studies on infant care also suggested that Japanese mothers were more likely to feed their infants on demand and soothed them quickly when they were in distress and were less likely to engage in verbal interaction and other forms of stimulation with them compared to mothers in the US and European countries (Azuma, 1994; Caudill & Plath, 1966). This level of on-demand physical responsiveness occurs at night as well, as co-sleeping has been the norm in Japan for centuries and persists among most families in contemporary times (Benesse Educational Research and Development Institute [BERD], 2019).

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As children move beyond infancy, their parents begin to teach them more explicitly the dispositions and skills that they need to flourish and thrive in their community. Early studies found that Japanese parents valued intra-group harmony and desired for their children to develop prosocial and affiliative behaviors (Hess et al., 1980). Other classic studies on Japanese childrearing found that most mothers in Japan tried to nurture such prosocial qualities as kindness (yasashisa), empathy (omoiyari), sensitivity (sensai), and politeness (reigi tadashii) in their children, and helped them learn to avoid inconveniencing others (meiwaku wo kakenai) and to blend into society without conflicts (Holloway, 2010; White & LeVine, 1986). This moral emphasis on prosocial and affiliative behaviors doesn’t mean that Japanese mothers wanted their children to be extremely passive and obedient. Instead, many parents describe an ideal child as being sunao, a term that connotes a happy receptiveness to adult guidance (White & LeVine, 1986). Children who are sunao have a tendency to be considerate of others, not because they are being forced to do so but because they internally understand why such behavior is valued, and because it gives them a sense of pleasure to treat others well. As more research on Japanese parenting was conducted in the 1980s and beyond, some studies illuminated the importance to parents of wakaraseru, which refers to the idea of helping a child understand why something is important to do. Japanese parents’ perception that compliance without a willing desire on the part of the child was of little or no value (Holloway, 2010). These works suggest that wakaraseru is a common socialization strategy used by many Japanese to accomplish a child’s understanding of the reasons for doing something, as opposed to simply requiring obedience. For instance, to gain a child’s understanding, mothers were found to be careful and persistent in explaining the reasons that good behavior is necessary. It has been also reported that they would tolerate imperfect compliance in the short term, favoring a view that looks at the longer process of forming the child’s moral guidelines based on such values as kindness and empathy. To augment this notion of wakaraseru, Hess and Azuma found that instead of punishing children or using power assertion, Japanese mothers tended to call their children’s attention to the consequences of misbehavior (Hess & Azuma, 1991). For instance, Japanese mothers often attempted to induce the child’s empathy by pointing out the emotional repercussions on other people or even on inanimate objects. In a powerful example of this socialization strategy, Hess and colleagues described a mother who told them that if her child were to draw on his wall, she would tell him that the wall felt sad because it didn’t look nice anymore (Conroy et al., 1980). Mimamoru, translated as “watching over” or “looking on from a distance”, is another socialization technique that is prominent in the Japanese childrearing context (Holloway, 2010). For example, if a child refuses to share a toy with a peer and the two begin squabbling, the mother may watch and observe quietly rather than intervene. At a later point, she may initiate a brief discussion with them, asking what happened or inquiring as to how the peer might have felt as a result of not being able to use the toy. The intention of this mimamoru strategy is to avoid a power struggle and allow the child to learn through the consequences of his or her actions rather than by the mother’s responses. Mimamoru has also been identified as a

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strategy used by preschool teachers as well as in professional development materials for future teachers (Bamba & Haight, 2011; Holloway, 2000; Tobin et al., 2009). Included in the more contemporary research, a new comparative study conducted by Senzaki and Shimizu (2022) sheds light on the role of cultural context in affecting the development of children’s attention during the early years. When mothers and children were asked to describe a cartoon that used a caregiver-child joint scene description task on stimuli of a cartoon of focal objects and their background, Japanese mothers tended to direct their child’s attention to social relations between the characters. US mothers tended to direct their child’s attention to the focal objects, rather than how they were related to one another. After completing the task, the children in the US continued to exhibit strong object-oriented attention, where Japanese children showed an increase in their attention to relationships between the focal objects and their context compared to their pre-task orientation. Building upon earlier comparative work (Bornstein et al., 2012; Fernald & Morikawa, 1993), this study provides new insights into the culturally specific processes of young children’s attention development and its relation to social cognition. Another recent study offers some of the first empirical observations of naturally occurring prosocial interactions among young children (Kato-Shimizu et al., 2022). When children experienced prosocial behavior from a peer, they responded with similar behavior, offering possible insight into the early development of intra-group harmony and other culturally valued qualities such as kindness, empathy, and sensitivity. These classic and contemporary works on Japanese socialization goals and practices illuminate cultural models that are prevalent among parents and child development experts in their community. At the same time, this literature cautions against sweeping generalizations that all parents share the same goals and engage in the same culturally sanctioned behaviors. Even within a small, relatively homogeneous nation like Japan, each parent exerts agency and individuality in how they interpret and apply cultural models of childrearing to which they are exposed. Fluidity, variability, and contestation are all part of the dynamics of childrearing in Japan as in any other society, as each parent may to some extent decide to accept, reject, or adapt cultural models of childrearing to their circumstances (Gjerde, 2004; Holloway, 2000, 2010). The structure of social class is a particularly important source of intra-nation variability in childrearing in Japan. College-educated middle-class mothers typically express the aspiration that their young children – whether male or female – attend college in the future, whereas working-class mothers without a college education tend to see college as an option for their sons, but not for their daughters (Brinton, 1993; Yamamoto, 2016). For example, Yamamoto and Hosokawa (2017) described a working-class mother who asserted that she would send her son to after-school classes because college education was “a must” in order for boys to become the breadwinner for his family (Yamamoto & Hosokawa, 2017). These narratives illustrate the variation among Japanese mothers in terms of their educational aspirations for their children. They also expose the challenges and complexity of promoting gender equity across multiple layers within society.

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Fathers As we emphasized earlier in this chapter, the day-to-day activities of childrearing in pre-war Japan tended to be community-based enterprises in which childcare was distributed among older relatives and servants rather than parents. After the war, government officials were intent on revitalizing its economy by bringing rural residents to the cities to work in the newly developing manufacturing sector. As its infrastructure depended on a reliable workforce of male full-time employees, the government’s solution was to encourage women to stay at home and care for the children rather than seeking employment themselves. Social and political institutions propelled this contemporary notion of the “Japanese family,” and argued that mothers were exclusively capable of caring for their own children because of their purported biologically-based emotional sensitivity compared to that of fathers or professional caregivers. Thus, these post-war cultural ideas about early care pushed women to the forefront and left relatively little room for male caregivers (Borovoy, 2005). The generation of Japanese who grew up in those decades from the 1960s to the end of the twentieth century typically experienced their fathers as being strict or even frightening (kowai). Holloway’s in-depth interviews indicated that women of the post-war generation remembered their fathers chiefly as authoritarian figures who showed little warmth and often utilized corporal punishment (Holloway, 2010). A similar narrative is supported by a survey study of 1147 couples conducted by Shwalb and his team (1997) who found that few Japanese members of the postwar generation remembered their fathers as having played with them when they were children, or even of being home at all. Contemporary Japanese parents can more readily envision the value of fathers being more involved in family life, perhaps as a result of the ikumen movement, mentioned earlier, which encourages men to be actively engaged in childrearing. Married men in one study expressed a desire to be more involved in family life than their own fathers, often describing them as hanmenkyoshi, or “a counter example from which one can learn” (Mizukoshi et al., 2016). In spite of their desire to be involved in childrearing, most had not taken family leave when their children were born. Indeed, several reports document the very limited implementation of parental leave by men in Japan, even though Japanese employment law mandates employers to grant paid leave entitlements of up to 30 weeks with job protection guaranteed throughout the leave (Earle and Heymann, 2019). Although 82.2% of female employees took parental leave in 2018, only 6.16% of male employees did so (Ministry of Health, Labour, and Welfare, 2022). Among those who took parental leave, almost 90% of women took more than 6 months whereas the majority of the male group (56.9%) took less than 5 days. Given this evidence that Japanese men opt out of taking parental leave, it is also not surprising to find that they may be less involved in family life than fathers in most other countries. A recent report by the OECD (2020) found that Japanese men spent 452 minutes (on average) in paid labor per day, the longest time among the

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OECD nations, with Korea being the second highest, with 419 minutes. Japanese men ranked in last place for time spent on childrearing and domestic work – just 41 minutes – compared with an average of 136 minutes across all the OECD nations. Similarly, data on the time use of Japanese families with children under 6 years of age showed that mothers spent an average of 7 hours and 34 minutes per day, while fathers spent an average of 1 hour and 23 minutes (Bureau of Statistics of the Ministry of Internal Affairs and Communications, 2017). Japanese men’s time with their children stands in stark contrast to that of fathers in the United States, Germany, Sweden, and Norway, who spend over 3 h per day on average performing housework/childcare (Gender Equality Bureau, Cabinet Office, 2017). In one study, Japanese men said that taking leave or spending more time on childrearing is unrealistic due to heavy work commitments and long working hours (Matsubara et al., 2020). Men also expressed that their workplaces lack understanding and flexibility for male employees with young children, such as flextime and telework options, compared to female employees, especially at the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic (BERD, 2021). These reports shed light on multiple experiences among fathers in Japan, urging us to understand diverse views that they have to formulate innovative initiatives to boost men’s participation in childrearing. One report with such an approach surveyed fathers about their activities and aspirations, then grouped them with others who had similar profiles (Kobayashi et al., 2018). These included one group of men seemingly paralyzed by incompatible desires to engage in work and childrearing, a second of men who clearly prioritized childrearing, a third whose career aspirations were paramount, and a fourth who emphasized their role as a breadwinner. Differences in family involvement-related behaviors across the groups were also captured in the report. For instance, 13.8% of the men in the “paralyzed” group reported having taken parental leave, as opposed to 1.8% for the “breadwinner” group, and 3.6% for the “career aspiration” group. The groups also differed in terms of how much childrearing they actually do at present. The findings suggest the need to develop effective strategies and initiatives to support men’s family involvement in ways that acknowledge significant variability and change in men’s preferences, goals, and experiences.

Conclusions/Implications The history of Japan is particularly fascinating in regard to the complex ways in which childrearing goals and practices are affected by social institutions and cultural norms. This is particularly true as the social and cultural manipulation of parenting and family life by political and social institutions was salient during the country’s transition to becoming a modern nation. In some ways, what may appear to be purely “cultural” in terms of contemporary family life is actually a result of a conscious and highly orchestrated attempt by those institutions to revive an imagined “traditional” Japanese family. During the Meiji era and again in the post-war years, government officials emphasize the idea that mothers are biologically primed to feel more intense

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love for their children than fathers and are therefore the only ones who can care for them effectively. Women who accepted this view felt pressure to remain at home rather than engaging in wage labor, without ample support to share the responsibility for childcare. Women who did not accept this view were often criticized for being “selfish,” a powerful form of group sanctioning. Thus it is our view that one of the remedies for Japan’s low fertility rate as well as gender inequity in the home and at the workplace is to reform family policies in ways that address contemporary changes in values and expectations. First, it is urgent for Japan to update policies and practices in the workplace. There should be more flexible and diverse options so that employees with family responsibilities have the power to decide the amount, scheduling, location, and nature of their work. In a study of how married couples with young children negotiated their childrearing responsibilities during the pandemic, life satisfaction and family involvement were higher for the fathers with options to adjust the amount and schedule of their work, compared to those without any flexibility (Hirai & Watanabe, 2021). The study illuminates the importance of offering diverse options for one’s working style and enforcing penalties for employer non-compliance. It is also urgent for Japan to invest more in early care and education (ECE). By exacerbating existing conditions already affecting working mothers with young children, the COVID-19 pandemic clearly revealed their unstable and untenured employment arrangements, the lack of high-quality ECE centers offering flexible hours, and the shortage of qualified teachers (Nikkei, 2022). A recent longitudinal study on a Japanese national data set found that having better access to ECE centers was associated with a subsequent rise in the fertility rate, especially in the areas where women’s employment was higher (Fukai, 2017). These two reports call for more public investment in having high-quality programs accessible across regions and compensating early childhood educators more fairly to achieve pay equity with other teachers, and funding centers to provide young children and families with high-quality care and safe spaces for children’s optimal growth and development. There should be more comprehensive services based on cross-sector collaborations and partnerships across the public, nonprofit, and private sectors to circumvent the compartmentalization of child and family policies (Ito, 2019). Such collaboration may provide infants, children, and their families with wrap-around services based on the family’s needs. As an example of cross-sector collaboration, the newly debated “Child and Family Agency” could have a significant impact on Japan’s fertility crisis and the accompanying malaise currently experienced by many Japanese women. Careful debate and policy efficacy assessments by child development experts, economists, and policy analysts are warranted in the development of this new agency. All these recommendations highlight the fact that sustainable child and family policies are indeed the backbone of the country’s infrastructure, including supporting adults as parents and as workers (Fujisaki & Ohinata, 2010). If well designed, they have a chance of making positive changes in the wellbeing of young children and adults, in the falling fertility rate and the stalled gender revolution in Japan. The means for implementing these policies depend on political will, individual engagement, and cultural change.

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Shwalb, D. W., Kawai, H., Shoji, J., & Tsunetsugu, K. (1997). The middle class Japanese father: A survey of parents of preschoolers. Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology, 6, 497–511. Super, C. M., & Harkness, S. (1997). The cultural structuring of child development. In J. W. Berry, P. Dasen, & T. S. Saraswathi (Eds.), Handbook of cross-cultural psychology: Volume 2: Basic processes and human development (pp. 1–39). Allyn & Bacon. Tobin, J., Yeh, H., & Karasawa, M. (2009). Preschool in three cultures revisited. University of Chicago Press. Uno, K. S. (1999). Passages to modernity: Motherhood, childhood, and social reform in early twentieth century Japan. University of Hawaii. Vazsonyi, A. T., Ksinan, A. J., Javakhishvili, M., Scarpate, J. M., & Kahumoku-Fessler, E. (2021). Links between parenting and internalizing and externalizing problems: Cross-cultural evidence from ten countries. Child Psychiatry & Human Development. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10578021-01153-2 White, M., & LeVine, R. (1986). What is an "ii ko" (good child)? In H. Stevenson, H. Azuma, & K. Hakuta (Eds.), Child development and education in Japan (pp. 55–62). Freeman. Yamamoto, Y. (2016). Gender and social class differences in Japanese mothers’ beliefs about children’s education and socialisation. Gender and Education, 28(1), 72–88. Yamamoto, Y., & Hosokawa, S. (2017). Maternal aspirations and expectations of their children’s educational attainment in Japan: Relations to gender and mothers’ educational levels. International Psychology Bulletin, 21(3), 25–33. Yamamura, Y. (1986). The child in Japanese society. In H. Stevenson, H. Azuma, & K. Hakuta (Eds.), Child development and education in Japan (pp. 28–38). Freeman.

Ayumi Nagase is an Associate Professor of Early Childhood Studies at Sonoma State University. Prior to coming to SSU, Nagase received her masters’ and doctoral degrees in Human Development from the Graduate School of Education, UC Berkeley. Nagase is involved in research on the impact of reflective consultation on Early Childhood Educators and their well-being, the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on young children and their families in Northern California and an international research project on parenting self-efficacy and psychological factors that empower parents and young children. Susan D. Holloway is Professor of the Graduate School of Education at the University of California, Berkeley. She holds a B.A. from the University of California, Santa Cruz and a Ph.D. from the School of Education at Stanford University. Her interest in Japanese family life and education spans four decades. She is the author of Contested Childhood: Diversity and Change in Japanese Preschools and Women and Family in Contemporary Japan.

Parenting in Israel: Together Hand in Hand: You Are Mine and I Am Yours Miri Scharf and Sharona Natan

Israeli Society: Its Development and Characteristics Israel is a small, young country characterized by cultural diversity, with traditional family patterns existing alongside modern lifestyles. Founded 74 years ago, Israel has absorbed massive waves of immigration over the years from more than 70 different countries (Lavee & Katz, 2003) and has increased its population ninefold. The country’s population numbers 9,291,000, of whom approximately 75% are Jews. The remainder are primarily Arabs, who comprise 21% of its population (Central Bureau of Statistics, 2020). Since Israel is a young country with immigration dynamics, it combines the influences of a traditional-collectivistic approach with a more Western individualistic approach (Lissak, 2009). Individualist and collectivist orientations implicate various psychological and childrearing differences (Bornstein et al., 2007). More individualist societies emphasize self-reliance, exploration, and independence, whereas more collectivist societies stress sensitivity to others, obedience, and obligation (Hofstede, 2001). In general, living in a developed, industrialized Western country, Israelis are similar to North Americans in their focus on individualistic values (Schwartz, 1994). However, an important characteristic of Israeli society is related to its emphasis on communal values and practices and to the high value placed on the family (Lavee & Katz, 2003). There are two unique features in Israeli society. The first relates to its strong communal and familial values (Scharf & Mayseless 2010), maintaining traditional Jewish family values and norms alongside a modern and developed economy. Despite changes over the past decades, Israel has remained a highly familial and close-knit society, with more stable families than in most industrialized countries.

M. Scharf (*) · S. Natan Department of Counseling and Human Development, University of Haifa, Haifa, Israel e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_9

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According to the OECD, Israel has one of the highest marriage rates in the developed world, at 6.3 marriages per 1000 inhabitants, compared to the OECD average of 5.0 (OECD, 2016). In addition, divorce is relatively less common, with about 75% of Israelis remaining married their entire adult lives (Central Bureau of Statistics, 2020). Although the place of the single person as an individual has grown, marriage is still a central institution in Israeli society (Shahar & Elmakies, 2016). Moreover, Israel is a “child-oriented” society (Lavee & Katz, 2003). The importance in Israeli life of having children is reflected in the country’s birthrates, which are the highest in the developed world: 3.1 children per woman of childbearing age, compared to the OECD average of 1.7 (OECD, 2016). In addition, Israel is the only country in the world that provides almost unlimited, universal state funding for fertility treatments (Birenbaum Carmeli, 2009; Okun, 2013). Close and frequent contact with family members, especially with parents, is maintained throughout life (Silverstein et al., 2010). The second feature relates to the stressful context in which Israelis live (Scharf & Mayseless, 2010). As stated, Israel is a young country, and most of its citizens are either themselves new immigrants to the country or second- or third-generation immigrants (Kahan-Strawczynski et al., 2013). Many immigrants came from Eastern Europe following the Holocaust, others as refugees from Arab countries. Themes of trauma and persecution are part of their experience. Furthermore, since its establishment, Israel has been constantly afflicted by the Israeli-Arab conflict with repeated wars, terrorist acts on both sides, and other security-related issues. A large majority of each cohort of 18-year-old Jewish youth serves a two- to three-year term of compulsory military service, and the majority of Israeli families have suffered personal injury or loss or have close relatives or personal friends that have experienced these events (Milgram, 1993). Also, although the economic situation has changed and currently Israelis, in general, enjoy moderately good economic status, during the first two decades of Israel’s existence, its economic climate was difficult, and many Israelis suffered from poverty (Lissak, 2009). Both these familial communal features and Israel’s stressful circumstances are reflected in its parenting practices. A large number of studies of parenting have been conducted in Israel, and some have investigated issues pertinent to Israeli culture. For example, several studies have examined parenting and war- or trauma-related issues, such as perceived social support among parents who had lost a child in a terrorist attack (Saka, 2019) and the meaning the parent attached to this loss (Danieli et al., 2016). Further studies have focused on the effects of immigration on parenting and children’s adjustment (Aviad-Wilchek et al., 2017), parenting of adult children among ex-prisoners of war (Solomon & Zerach, 2020), and the echoes of Holocaust trauma as reflected in parenting (Amir, 2020; Scharf, 2007). Other studies have examined cross-cultural differences, mainly between Jews and Arabs in Israel (Yaffe, 2020). Another body of research investigated issues that are less specific to Israeli culture, for example, the relationship between parental attachment and internalizing and externalizing problems of school-goers and homeschoolers (Guterman & Neuman, 2020) and the adolescent–parent relationship and the adolescent’s sense

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of entitlement (Tolmacz et al., 2016). Other studies examined the growth, quality of life, and empowerment of parents of children with disabilities (Edelstein et al., 2019; Geva & Werner, 2021), as well as hope as a resource for growth among parents who have abused their children (Aram & Davidson, 2017). These studies will not be discussed here and interested readers may refer directly to the relevant articles. This chapter will focus on two central dimensions of parent– child relations that are manifested uniquely in Israeli culture: parental closeness and parental control. Parental closeness is characterized by aspects of acceptance between parent and child, warmth, responsiveness, affection, and additional parenting behaviors, such as emotional and behavioral involvement in the child’s life. The control/autonomy dimension refers to the parent’s ability to grant autonomy to the child alongside the parent’s ability to regulate and monitor the child’s behavior (Darling & Steinberg, 1993). Granting autonomy refers to the extent to which the parent facilitates autonomous decision-making and behavior in the child, balanced with adequate support according to the situation and the child’s developmental stage. It reflects tolerance of different opinions, as well as respect for the child’s privacy and encouragement of the child’s independent activities and reasoning (Roth et al., 2009). High levels of granting autonomy are reflected in enabling children to make choices about activities and behavior and encouraging the development of independence. Typical expressions of positive parental control are setting limits and monitoring the child’s behavior (Steinberg, 2001), while negative parental control may be manifested in psychological control (Mayseless & Scharf, 2009; Scharf & Goldner, 2018; Schiffrin et al., 2014). These parental dimensions are important for healthy psychological development and functioning throughout the life of the child. Because of the cultural characteristics unique to Israeli society, this developmental task might be more challenging. These issues will be illustrated here with selected findings and examples from studies conducted in Israel.

Closeness in the Parent–Child Relationship in Israel Children in Israel report a relationship marked by a high degree of closeness to their parents. In the context of these relations, children feel that they trust their parents and that they can turn to them at times of distress. In a sample of 3496 eighth- to eleventh-grade students (1884 girls; 53.9%), about 70% of the teens reported a relationship with their parents that could be characterized as having a high degree of closeness, a sense of acceptance, openness, and trust (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005; Scharf et al., 2016). Similar findings were demonstrated among young adults aged 18–25 (Mayseless & Hai, 1998; Shulman & Ben-Artzi, 2003). Students aged 21 and above reported a warm and close relationship with their parents, in which they trusted their parents at times of distress and turned to them for advice. According to students’ reports, the parents were emotionally available to them, listened to their problems, and supported them emotionally and materially (Bar-Tur et al., 2018).

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In two longitudinal studies (Scharf et al., 2004; Scharf et al., 2011), Scharf and her colleagues followed adolescents (88 boys, 120 girls) and their parents through the last year of high school, collecting data through questionnaires and interviews. It was found that a large proportion of youngsters view their parents (in particular the mother) as highly central in their lives, both in the present and in the future. About 50% of these youngsters perceived their mothers and fathers as the most important people in their lives. Similarly, more than a third of the youngsters wished to live close to their parents in the future (to a very high degree). Parents, too, appear to be highly invested in their children and expect them to stay close by and continue to have a daily connection. Responding to an interviewer’s question—“When you try to imagine your daughter ten years from now, how do you see her”?—one mother answered, She is in my home all the time, and I’m in her home all the time.. .. I hope she will not draw away and that she will visit a lot. I’m sure; she already said she will not separate, so it’s O.K. Our relationship (ten years later) will be close-close. They will become close again. Because at the beginning she will leave home, after she will have children then we’ll be close again.

The centrality of the child in their parents’ lives is also reflected in Israel in challenging parenting conditions. Thus, for example, parents high in sensory processing sensitivity (SPS) may be overwhelmed and, as a result, practice ineffective parenting strategies, such as paying less attention to the child’s needs, and consequently treat their children as less central to their lives (Turner et al., 2012). Nevertheless, in Israel, adolescents of parents characterized by SPS reported that they felt central to their parents’ lives (Goldberg & Scharf, 2020). When examining the implications of the close relations between children and their parents for the children’s functioning, a fairly clear picture indicating positive psychosocial functioning emerges (Scharf et al., 2004; Scharf et al., 2011), as well as high levels of mental wellbeing (Bar-Tur et al., 2018). Among girls, this was demonstrated in better adaptability to required military service (Scharf et al., 2011) and a low level of involvement in risky behaviors (Sasson & Mesch, 2016). Moreover, the affectionate and close ties between adolescents and their parents have long-term positive implications that are reflected in the perception of future couple relationships and parenthood. For example, adolescents who perceived the relationship with their parents as characterized by closeness, affection, and attentiveness reported positive expectations of intimate relationships with their romantic partners (Einav, 2014). In a longitudinal study, males revealed buds of parenting that included an intrinsic motivation to have children, perceived themselves as capable of being competent parents, and expected that they were likely to feel satisfaction with the parenting role (Scharf & Mayseless, 2011). The findings underscore the unique nature of Jewish society in Israel in reflecting both collectivist and individualistic values. It is also possible that the ongoing conflict between Israel and its Arab neighbors and the tensions and dangers associated with military service and terrorism strengthen internal ties and reliance on family. In addition, the country’s small size allows for geographical proximity of

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family members, so that frequent personal contact and intra-family involvement, which enable handy emotional and material assistance, contribute to the preservation of family values and a close relationship among family members.

Control and Autonomy in Parent–Child Relationships in Israel Adolescents and their parents regard autonomy as a very important value in their lives (49% and 42%, respectively; Natan & Scharf, 2020). In the Natan and Scharf study, 798 adolescents and 275 parents reported relatively high parental support for adolescent autonomy (adolescents M = 5.44, SD = 1.06, parents M = 5.60, SD = 1.00 on a scale of 1–7). Similar findings were revealed among adolescents and young adults from developed countries, who reported support for autonomy using the same questionnaire (Livinţi & Iliescu, 2019; Won & Yu, 2018). Similar to other Western societies, in Israel parental autonomy support was found to be positively associated with good social adjustment, prosocial behavior, a high level of mental wellbeing, and self-esteem (Natan & Scharf, 2020), with autonomous academic motivation (Roth et al., 2016), adaptive emotional regulation, positive intimate behaviors with romantic partners (Roth & Assor, 2012), and less risky behaviors (Sher-Censor et al., 2021). Low levels of parental autonomy support were found to be associated with behavioral problems, symptoms of depression, anxiety, and somatic complaints (Natan & Scharf, 2020). In the sample of 3496 eighth- to eleventh-grade students who reported a high level of closeness (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005), half of the teens reported that this close relationship was combined with a low level of parental monitoring, boundary setting, and enforcement of rules. About 30% of them experienced closeness and warmth in relationships with parents in conjunction with indulgence and leniency. This parental indulgence was found to be associated with a sense of “royalty” among youth—that they were “entitled” to what they wanted without a parental demand for reciprocity. Thus, many of these youngsters believed that “the main role of parents is to indulge their children and satisfy their requests.” Additionally, 20% of Israeli adolescents report moderate closeness to their parents, while also reporting parental intrusiveness, guilt-inducing behavior, and psychological control. These findings were similar across different socioeconomic backgrounds, adolescent ages, and other demographic characteristics (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005; Scharf et al., 2004; Scharf et al., 2011). These findings indicate a problematic parenting pattern regarding boundaries in the parent–child relationship in Israel. Thus, although closeness is a prevalent characteristic of parent-adolescent relationships, the findings also reveal two different profiles of less adequate parenting that might affect the functioning of youth. The first profile concerns a low level of behavioral control. The Israeli parent appears to be reluctant to impose rules and requirements on their children and refrains from

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consistently enforcing them. Experiencing indulgent parenting comprised of warmth without adequate monitoring and control does not necessarily lead to serious problems of violence, but is a significant risk factor for less severe discipline problems such as vandalism, disruptive behavior, and difficulties in school (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005). Lack of parental response to problem behavior might be perceived as positive reinforcement (Patterson, 2002). Additionally, mild discipline problems often reflect difficulty regulating emotions and behaviors. The parent–child relationship is the main arena in which children acquire and develop emotional regulation skills. The second problematic parenting profile concerns over-parenting or intrusive/ psychologically controlling parenting. Over-parenting (or helicopter parenting) refers to the use of developmentally inappropriate levels of involvement, control, and problem solving by parents and is indicative of problems in family differentiation, as it emphasizes relatedness while disregarding autonomy (Segrin et al., 2012). Intrusive parents do not respect the individual boundaries of their children, expressed, among other ways, in psychological control. Parental psychological control involves attempts to control the child through psychological tactics such as instilling anxiety and inducing guilt (Soenens & Vansteenkiste, 2010). As part of psychological control, parents may constrain the child’s expression of emotions and thoughts in order to control the child’s activities and behaviors in a way that impedes the child’s ability to develop a separate self-identity (Barber, 2002). According to their offspring, secular Jewish parents showed lower levels of overparenting and psychological control compared to ultra-Orthodox parents (Natan & Scharf, 2020) and Arab parents in Israel (Scharf et al., 2017), which are both populations more collectivist in nature. Parental behaviors involving psychological control have been observed as early as in parents of preschool children (mean age 3–5 years old) (Khoury-Kassabri et al., 2020) and among parents of young children in middle childhood (mean age 8 years old) (Rousseau et al., 2018). Similar to other individualistic societies, high levels of over-parenting and intrusive parenting were associated with lower levels of emotional wellbeing, social problems (Natan & Scharf 2020), and lower levels of prosocial behaviors (Davidov et al., 2021; Natan & Scharf 2020). Increased use of practices characterized as over-parenting has been linked to higher levels of interpersonal sensitivity expressed in low assertiveness and high levels of dependence in interpersonal relationships (Rousseau & Scharf, 2015; Scharf et al., 2017). The functioning of children who experience involved and intrusive parenting was found to be problematic, especially in externalizing behaviors such as violence and delinquency. These children were also more vulnerable to violence as victims, and they had high levels of ADHD (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005), as well as anxiety, depression, loneliness, somatic problems (Natan & Scharf 2020; Rousseau & Scharf, 2015; Scharf & Mayseless 2005), maladaptive perfectionism (Rousseau et al., 2018), problematic eating behaviors and attitudes, and body dissatisfaction (Scharf & Levy, 2015). It appears that similar to in North American countries, in Israel over-parenting and intrusive parenting constitute a risk factor for problematic adjustment among children. At the same time, at least one study shows no association between intrusive

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parenting and adjustment problems (Rousseau & Scharf, 2015). These mixed findings may once again highlight the unique features of Israeli society. Israeli parents are considered highly involved in their children’s lives. Children feel that they are central in their parents’ lives and vice versa. It is possible that in Israeli culture, parental involvement is experienced as more normative, and the children do not experience low levels of intrusive parenting as highly problematic but rather as an expression of caring and good intentions. The results of studies examining the relationship between over-parenting and gender in North American countries characterized as individualistic are inconsistent. Some studies have found that mothers tend to engage more in over-parenting than do fathers (Fingerman et al., 2012), while other studies do not confirm this association (Padilla-Walker & Nelson, 2012). Studies conducted in Israel have found that mothers engage in over-parenting more often than do fathers (Rousseau & Scharf, 2015), especially in higher levels of advice/affect management and lower levels of child self-direction (Scharf et al., 2017). This finding is consistent with the culture in the Jewish Israeli family, where mothers are considered highly involved in their children’s lives and their ties with their children tend to be closer and stronger than those of the fathers with their children (Bar-Tur et al., 2018). Further research is needed to establish and expand the existing knowledge on gender differences. In light of the existing sociocultural climate in Israel, there are several possible explanations for this unique parent–child relationship. This reduced parental authority and heightened permissiveness may reflect processes pertaining to childcenteredness that are taking place in Israeli society (Almog & Watzman, 2004). Children’s needs, self-actualization, and happiness are essential, and parents feel obliged to promote these goals. The previously discussed issues of immigration, economic difficulties typical of the early years in the young country, and, in some cases, shadows of Holocaust trauma may have shaped the parents’ own childhood experiences and may influence their parenting behaviors as parents. Fathers described deliberate efforts to be involved in their sons’ lives, show affection, and maintain closeness in the relationship. The fathers also described themselves as parents who spoil their children and provide them with an abundance of material possessions as a way to compensate for their own childhood deprivation (Bar-On & Scharf, 2016). The increased use of over-parenting strategies may stem from the parents’ desire to prevent their children from making mistakes or experiencing failure. Parents may use over-parenting strategies to try to correct painful experiences or events experienced as failures by guidance and over-involvement. A study that examined the conditions in which Israeli parents who tended to engage in over-parenting found that parents who were high in prevention focus (attempting to avoid difficulties, failure, or negative experiences as they perceived them as a sign of incompetence rather than an opportunity to learn and develop themselves) (Crowe & Higgins, 1997) also had a tendency to engage in over-parenting (Rousseau & Scharf, 2018). Parents in Israel who experienced financial difficulties as children or difficult life events as a result of their parents’ immigration or Holocaust trauma and who live in a

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state of constant existential stress and fear may engage in over-parenting to protect their children from experiences that they perceive to be difficult or dangerous. Parental permissiveness might also result from parents’ desire to allow their children a good life and not frustrate or upset them, assuming that life in Israel is difficult and dangerous enough and there is no knowing what the following day will bring. Possibly this threat to security, whether in the context of acts of terrorism or in relation to military service, and the feeling that life in Israel will be difficult and stressful for young people when they grow up compel parents to avoid confrontation with children, as may be required in exerting parental authority (Scharf & Mayseless, 2005). Furthermore, in the context of high geopolitical uncertainty, it is not entirely clear how to plan for the future or to know the best ways to succeed in life. In this case, it is preferable not to set clear goals and unequivocal rules for behavior, as the future is unpredictable. It is possible that as a parental strategy (not necessarily conscious), parents choose to educate their children to be flexible, to improvise, and to get along, rather than educating them to be obedient, which is not necessarily compatible with their unpredictable, frequently changing world. This uncertain and dangerous context might also explain the relatively high levels of involvement and intrusiveness. When the world is perceived as dangerous and chaotic, it may be a good parental strategy to raise children to remain close to their parents to allow their parents to protect them as long as this protection is required.

Concluding Remarks Culture plays an important part in the ways different childrearing practices are perceived by both parents and children and may affect children’s outcomes differently. In this chapter, the focus was on autonomy and relatedness in parent–child relationships. Keller and her colleagues (Keller et al., 2009) refer to two different parenting strategies. The proximal parenting style, which is expressed in physical contact and body stimulation, is prevalent in traditional subsistence societies where socialization goals that emphasize relatedness, obedience, and hierarchy are preferred (Kagitcibasi, 2005). The proximal parenting style bolsters closeness and warmth and is related to early development of compliance (Keller et al., 2005). The distal parenting style is characterized by communication from a distance and object stimulation and is prevalent in Western middle-class families where competition, individual achievement, and self-enhancement are preferred socialization goals (Keller, 2007; Lamm et al., 2015). It appears that these parenting strategies are relevant to parenting of children beyond infancy and childhood and that, in general, Israeli parents favor proximal parenting. This strategy might be more beneficial in collectivistic cultural contexts and is particularly crucial in dangerous and unpredictable environments where physical proximity to parents could ensure protection and survival (Simpson & Belsky, 2008). As revealed in the findings reviewed here, closeness to parents, and even heightened centrality of parents, is indeed associated with favorable outcomes.

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In a similar vein, Korean adolescents who reported higher family enmeshment had higher self-esteem (Chun & MacDermid, 1997). Generally, in Western societies, emotional autonomy is associated with better adjustment. However, Italian adolescents reporting greater family enmeshment did not experience more depressive symptoms or anxiety as they approached the transition from secondary school (Manzi et al. 2006). Manzi and colleagues suggested that given the high involvement prevailing in Italian family culture, these characteristics may not have been experienced as blurring interpersonal boundaries or limiting personal autonomy and, therefore, were not associated with adverse outcomes. Thus, it appears that the high levels of closeness prevalent in Israeli culture are beneficial for both parents and their offspring. However, it is clear that Israeli children do not favor obedience and hierarchy, and there are indications that parents, too, do not necessarily promote these qualities in their offspring. This resembles findings by Keller et al. (2009) demonstrating that parents from urban, educated families, in cultures with a more interdependent history, use both proximal and distal parenting strategies. These societies, including Israeli society, are industrial and competitive and therefore promoting autonomy is an important element in raising children to succeed. The ambivalent attitude toward authority is also reflected in Israeli attitudes toward authority figures and institutions in other domains of life. How can this be interpreted? The geopolitical circumstances of Israel might promote a less authoritarian style in order to raise creative and flexible children who can adapt to future challenging situations. Studies also demonstrated the complex outcomes of immigration on family dynamics (Strier & Roer-Strier, 2010), such as parental loss of authority and strong conflict between traditional and more liberal and democratic childrearing practices. Psychological interpretations might also be relevant. Parents construct their role based on their subjective experiences with their own parents, examining what they received from their parents and what they needed and wanted but did not receive (Osherson, 1986). This might culminate in greater indulgence, leniency, and closeness in their parenting. Parents may attempt to establish exactly the opposite type of relationship with their children as the one they had with their own parents. Thus, a strict disciplinary experience of their own may lead parents to be unwilling to impose any limits on their children or cause them frustration. This may result in the child’s inability to delay gratification, as well as in demanding behavior by the children. Parents may not be aware that they have actually reconstructed their past relationships and are again living in an authoritarian climate in which, this time, the role of their own parents is being taken on by their children (Scharf & Shulman, 2006). A quote from the Israeli satirical writer Efraim Sidon illustrates the special bond between Israeli parents and their children: What does an Israeli child have in his life? His parents and his parents and his parents, and his parents. And day and night they chase him, breathe down his neck and follow in his tracks . . . Because they will find him everywhere . . . Twenty-two years old or twenty-five, thirty years old, or fifty. There is no escape from his worried parents. Even if he lands on the moon or flies to Mars, they will follow him with a cake and warm clothes.

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Soenens, B., & Vansteenkiste, M. (2010). A theoretical upgrade of the concept of parental psychological control: Proposing new insights on the basis of self determination theory. Developmental Review, 30(1), 74–99. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dr.2009.11.001 Solomon, Z., & Zerach, G. (2020). The intergenerational transmission of trauma: When children bear their father’s traumatic past. Neuropsychiatrie de l’Enfance et de l’Adolescence, 68(2), 65–75. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neurenf.2020.01.004 Steinberg, L. (2001). We know some things: Parent–adolescent relationships in retrospect and prospect. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11(1), 1–19. https://doi.org/10.1111/1532-7795. 00001 Strier, R., & Roer-Strier, D. (2010). Fatherhood in the context of immigration. In M. E. Lamb (Ed.), The role of the father in child development 5th ed. (pp. 435–458). Wiley Tolmacz, R., Efrati, Y., & Ben-David, B. M. (2016). The sense of relational entitlement among adolescents toward their parents (SREap)—Testing an adaptation of the SRE. Journal of Adolescence, 53, 127–140. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.adolescence.2016.09.003 Turner, K. A., Cohn, E. S., & Koomar, J. (2012). Mothering when mothers and children both have sensory processing challenges. British Journal of Occupational Therapy, 75(10), 449–455. https://doi.org/10.4276/030802212X13496921049626 Won, S., & Yu, S. L. (2018). Relations of perceived parental autonomy support and control with adolescents’ academic time management and procrastination. Learning and Individual Differences, 61, 205–215. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.lindif.2017.12.001 Yaffe, Y. (2020). Comparing Bedouin and Jewish parents’ parenting styles and practices. International Journal of Adolescence and Youth, 25(1), 25–34. https://doi.org/10.1080/02673843. 2019.1577283

Miri Scharf is a professor in the department of Counseling and Human Development at the University of Haifa. Her research focuses on close relationships throughout the life cycle, and their implications on individuals’ normative and deviant developmental trajectories. It focuses on three major domains: attachment processes in adolescence and emerging adulthood, and their implications for social-emotional adjustment; parenting and parenting representations; risk and resiliency and resolution of difficult experiences. Over the years she has been involved in intervention projects with parents and children, which transfer the knowledge and insights gained from theoretical and empirical research into more effective and evidence-based practice. Sharona Natan is a lecturer in the department of Counseling and Human Development at the University of Haifa. Her research focuses on parent-adolescent relationships and adolescents’ psychosocial, especially among adolescents living in collectivist societies. In recent years she has been working in educational counseling especially with preschoolers. In addition, she guides educational counselors mainly on issues related to the prevention of sexual abuse.

Parenting in Contemporary Hong Kong: Observations Based on Recent Research Findings Daniel T. L. Shek, Rachel Sun, Janet T. Y. Leung, and Moon Law

Introduction In a previous publication on the cultural roots and contemporary development of parenting in Hong Kong, Shek and Sun (2014) addressed two issues – shaping of parenting by traditional Chinese culture and parenting phenomena in Hong Kong society based on research findings. Confucianism, Buddhism and Taoism as dominant social ideologies have shaped parenting behavior and family development. Shek and Sun (2014) described the unique characteristics of the traditional culture of China, including emphases on harmony with oneself, others (including family members) and nature, focus on social roles and obligations, particularly those related to the family, and treating collective interests as more important than individual interest. Traditional Chinese culture also upheld the importance of inhibition of emotional expression, avoidance of interpersonal conflict, strict parental control, bringing pride to the family, preserving the family name over time, differential treatment of boys and girls by fathers and mothers, and strong emphasis on filial piety as well as parental authority. Shek and Sun (2014) also gave some examples illustrating parenting practice in the traditional Chinese culture, including “classic 24 stories of filial piety”, “family instruction books - jia xun”, such as “Family Instruction of Master Yan” (“The Yanshi jiaxun”), “Family Instruction of Master This work was financially supported by Wofoo Foundation. D. T. L. Shek (✉) · R. Sun · J. T. Y. Leung Department of Applied Social Sciences, The Hong Kong Polytechnic University, Hong Kong, People’s Republic of China e-mail: [email protected]; [email protected] M. Law Department of Social Work, The Chinese University of Hong Kong, Hong Kong, People’s Republic of China e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_10

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Wu” (“The Wushi jiaxun”). They also introduced books governing the proper behavior of children, such as “Standards for Being a Good Student and Child” (Di Zi Gui). In addition to the traditional cultural roots of Chinese parenting, Shek and Sun (2014) highlighted several parenting phenomena in modern Hong Kong. While there are gradual changes in parenting practices, the influence of traditional Chinese culture is still significant. Regarding the role of parents in the parenting process, research shows that the roles have changed from “strict fathers, kind mothers” to “strict mothers, kind fathers” or “involved mothers, detached fathers”. Parents still have a strong emphasis on academic excellence in their children. There is also the worrying parenting phenomenon. Parents commonly spend little time with their children and their adolescent children have different perceptions of parenting attributes. Relevant to intact families, non-intact families showed relatively poorer family processes. Evidence-based programs on parenting in Hong Kong are not widespread. Against the above backdrop, we focus on several areas of contemporary parenting in Hong Kong in this chapter. First, we highlight the changing family landscape in Hong Kong that influences parenting practice. Second, with reference to recent studies on parenting, we highlight contemporary parenting practice phenomena in Hong Kong. Third, we used recent longitudinal and meta-analytic studies to re-visit the issue of parental differences. Fourth, we outline parenting influence on adolescent developmental outcomes based on recent studies of parenting in Hong Kong. Finally, we examine future research directions in parenting in Hong Kong.

Evolving Family Ecology in Hong Kong Before we outline parenting practice phenomena based on recent research studies in Hong Kong, we highlight the changing family ecology in Hong Kong. In an examination of the changing functions and forms of families in Hong Kong, Leung and Shek (2018a) highlighted several changing patterns in Hong Kong families, which eventually shape parenting practice. Leung and Shek (2018a) argued that there have been several changes in the structures and functions of Hong Kong families in the past a few decades. Because of the birth control campaign launched in the 1960s and 1970s and the rising burdens of child rearing (e.g., strong emphasis on academic excellence in the education system), there has been a change in the conception of child rearing. The notion of having children as an insurance for aging gradually weakened. Because of the emphasis on gender equality and economic independence of women, the marriage age of women has risen. As a result, there is also a delay and/or reluctance in having children. Because many women are working and with the high cost of living in Hong Kong (i.e., women must work for the financial need of the family), many child rearing tasks have been taken up by grandparents and overseas domestic helpers. Because each couple usually has fewer children and competition in the educational and occupational domains is very

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intense, the phenomenon of “over-parenting” (such as “monster parents” and “helicopter parents”) has grown. Because of the burdens associated with having kids, there is an emergence of “Double Income, No Kids” (DINK) families. With more job and accommodation opportunities in mainland China, cross-border marriages have increased. Consistent with the trends in the Western world, marital disruption intensifies in families in Hong Kong. There is a call for greater recognition for “non-traditional” forms of families, such as husbands taking care of the family while wives go out to work. According to Shek and Siu (2019), some of these family trends, such as a rising number of family disruption cases and over-emphases on academic excellence, constitute negative developmental contexts for child development. Obviously, when researchers consider parenting practice in Hong Kong, they must understand the related phenomena with reference to the backdrop of changing family ecology in Hong Kong.

Evolving Parenting Behavior in Hong Kong In the past decade, several large-scale parenting studies were conducted in Hong Kong. The first one is the study on parenting beliefs, expectations and practice in Hong Kong parents involving five cohorts of parents (Lam et al., 2020). The second one is the study examining parenting practice in Hong Kong (Chan et al., 2017). The third is a review of a series of family surveys in Hong Kong commissioned by the Family Council (Chan, 2021). The final study is a longitudinal study of the development and related determinants of adolescents in Hong Kong (e.g., Shek et al., 2019e; Zhu & Shek, 2021). In the first study, the researchers covered several areas of parenting, including parental expectations and aspirations for their children, gendered parental expectations and parental roles and responsibilities (Shek et al., 2019c). Although parental expectations and aspirations for children play an important role in parenting goals, they are under-researched in different Chinese contexts including Hong Kong. Utilizing an indigenously developed assessment tool of parental expectations, Shek et al. (2019c) examined expectations of parents and their aspirations for children’s future in five generational cohorts (N = 5707). Results revealed that while Chinese parents in Hong Kong generally had high expectations about the future of their children, they have diverse expectations about their children’s involvement in politics, possession of high social status, and quest for equality. The results also showed that parents who were older, with a lower education, retired, receiving welfare or having lower incomes generally held more conventional and higher aspirations for their children’s future. In the same study, Shek et al. (2019a) also reported findings on parental gendered expectations for sons and daughters using a 12-item measure. Results suggested that traditional expectations about sons and daughters were held by the parents, although such expectations gradually changed. Fathers and mothers performed different roles in raising sons and daughters. They also found that lower educational attainment or lower family income was

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related to stronger traditional gendered expectations. Furthermore, Shek et al. (2019b) argued that although egalitarian gender attitude prevailed, mothers still played a major role in childcare responsibilities. Shek et al. (2019d) found that while Hong Kong parents generally held positive beliefs, some parents were conservative in teaching their children about sexuality and some parents did not feel the need for parent education. Mothers displayed stronger parental beliefs than did fathers in different areas, and lower socio-economic status (low education level and low family income) was associated with stronger traditional beliefs about parenting. The second relevant study on parenting is a territory-wide study on parenting practice in Hong Kong (Chan et al., 2017). There are two objectives of the study, including construction of a comprehensive picture of parenting behavior in Hong Kong, and identification of antecedents of parenting behavior, stressors involved in parenting, impact of parenting on parent-child relationship, child development and family functioning (Chan et al., 2017). There are four components in the study, including a territory-wide survey based on questionnaires on parents and their children, focus groups based on parents as informants, archival research on measures on family and parenting support, and interviews with relevant stakeholders on parenting. In the questionnaire survey, researchers recruited 1510 children and their parents in families with children aged 3–8 and families with children aged 9–14. For families with children aged 3–8, parents were invited to complete questionnaires on their parenting practice and child developmental outcomes. For families with children aged 9–14, parents and their children completed instruments on parenting practice and indicators of child development. There are several important findings of the study. First, there is a lower likelihood of having parenting and parent-child relationship problems in some family types, including families with parents in their first marriage, two-parent families, higher socio-economic status families, and one-child families. Second, child developmental outcomes are relatively poorer in families with lower socio-economic status. Third, while there were positive relationships between parenting practice and child developmental outcomes, parenting stress was negatively related to child wellbeing. Finally, family functioning could moderate the negative relationships between family structure as well as family socio-economic status and child developmental outcomes. Based on the study, the research team made a series of recommendations in several areas. We should support families so that good family wellbeing, parenting and child developmental outcomes can be guaranteed (Recommendation 1) and family support should aim at family wellbeing that constitutes an important foundation of healthy parenting and child outcome (Recommendation 2). Parents should have access to parent education and parenting services at different stages of the family life cycle (Recommendation 3). Efforts should be made to help parents reflect on their parenting, so that they can gain more insight and sensitivity in their practice (Recommendation 4), and they should have help in joining child-centered parenting programs so that they can adopt positive parenting practices (Recommendation 5).

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For parents with special needs, tailor-made parent education and parenting programs should be designed (Recommendation 6). As far as the conceptual framework for family and parent education is concerned, several principles are recommended, including the adoption of the life stage approach (Recommendation 7), public health approach (Recommendation 8), and evidence-based approach (Recommendation 9) to develop and implement family and parent education programs. Promotion and publicity initiatives should be stepped up to promote positive values in family and parenting (Recommendation 10). Education programs should be strengthened (Recommendation 11) and regular monitoring mechanisms on family wellbeing and parenting should be attempted (Recommendation 12). Collaboration amongst different sectors on family and parenting education should be fostered (Recommendation 13), relevant education programs should be provided to children and young people (Recommendation 14), and family should have access to help to develop as an institution that is committed to life-long learning (Recommendation 15). Researchers recommended that school curriculums should be reviewed to reduce parenting stress (Recommendation 16) and different schools should be operated to meet the diverse needs of the children (Recommendation 17). More initiatives to promote family-work balance should be developed (Recommendation 18) and NGOs should play a more active role in developing and implementing family and parenting programs (Recommendation 19). Greater involvement of neighbourhoods to promote positive parenting should be fostered (Recommendation 20), and greater support from relatives and extended families to promote positive parenting should be encouraged (Recommendation 21). The Government should lead the initiation, development and delivery of family support and parenting education programs in Hong Kong (Recommendation 22), set up a Family Development Fund to promote parenting education (Recommendation 23), and set an example of a family-friendly employer promoting family-work balance (Recommendation 24). All concerned parties should be involved in the promotion of family and parenting education, thus making it a collective responsibility (Recommendation 25). In the third study, Chan (2021) examined the findings from the four family surveys (2011, 2013, 2015 and 2017) commissioned by the Family Council in Hong Kong. Parents were generally positive in their strategies, and they wished to serve as role models for their children. However, research findings also showed that dual-career parents experienced multiple role stresses. The final study is the six-year longitudinal study conducted within the context of the Project P.A.T.H.S. (Positive Adolescent Training through Holistic Social Programmes). We collected data over 6 years in the high school years to understand the psychosocial development of secondary school students, as well as showing how family influences adolescent development (Shek et al., 2018; Shek et al., 2019e). Longitudinal analyses using growth curve analyses showed that parental control (behavioral control and psychological control) declined throughout time. Changes in parent-child relational quality revealed a U-shape curve. The commonly accepted account of such developmental trajectories is that with maturation and

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independence, parental control in early adolescence would gradually weaken. Because of increased conflict between parents and their children, the parentadolescent relationship would decline initially but would gradually improve when the adolescents matured and improved communication with their parents. In short, parental control gradually declines and parent-child relationship shows a U-shape trajectory in adolescent years.

Parental Differences in Parenting Practice Shek and Sun (2014) pointed out that gender differences in parenting practice is a salient feature of traditional Chinese parenting, as exemplified in the saying of “strict father, kind mother.” The differentiation in parental role is a result of the economic and social structures in traditional China. Economically speaking, agriculture used to be the main economic activity. Men were important for farming, harvest, and fighting intruders in traditional agricultural societies. Because farming required stable conditions, the social structure in agricultural society was relatively more structured and traditions were highly respected. Table 1 shows the meaning of “men” and “women” in Chinese characters. In our previously published papers, we found that the notion of “strict fathers, kind mothers” has transformed to “strict mothers, kind fathers” and “strict mothers, detached fathers”. Unfortunately, the research studies reported in such papers are mainly cross-sectional and longitudinal studies with a short duration only (e.g., Shek, 2007). In recent years, we have conducted two more studies to look at gender differentiation in Chinese parents in Hong Kong. In the first study, we examined whether fathers differed from mothers on parenting and parent-child relationship in a dataset containing six waves of data (Shek & Dou, 2020). The longitudinal data were based on students studying in Grade 7 to Grade 12 (N = 2023) from 28 schools from different regions in Hong Kong. We used three measures of parenting and parentchild relationship in this study. First, we assessed behavioral control of parents including knowledge about their children, monitoring and parental expectations. Second, we assessed the degree of psychological control (e.g., intrusion into the psychological world of children such as inducing of guilt and withdrawal of love) perceived by adolescents. Finally, we examined parent-child relationships such as perceived support provided by the parents. Based on growth curve analyses, we observed two interesting phenomena. First, gender significantly predicted the related measures at Wave 1, as well as changes in behavioral control and parent-child relationships over time. Compared with fathers, mothers were perceived as showing a higher level of behavioral control at each wave. For psychological control, perceived levels were higher in mothers in Waves 1, 3 and 5. Mothers showed a faster decline in the trajectories of behavioral control and psychological control. This study showed that perceived parenting differences exist at different time points and across time during adolescence. This study is a pioneer in different Chinese contexts because no study had examined parental

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Table 1 The origin and meaning of Chinese characters (man, woman, husband, wife, father, mother) 甲骨文 (Oracle bone script)

金文 (Bronze script)

篆書 (Seal script)

隸書 (Clerical script)

楷書 (Standard script)

男 Man

女 Woman

Man: “Field” and “strength” (active) Woman: “Kneel” down and put hands on the abdomen (reserved and “shy”) (passive) 夫 Husband

婦 Wife

Husband: Man with a hairpin on the head (formal work) Wife: Woman with a broom (domestic work) 父 Father 母 Mother

Father: One who holds a status object (head) Mother: One who feeds the child (breast feeding – two nipples) (rearing child)

differences on the levels and rates of change of parenting attributes in high school years. In another study, we conducted a meta-analysis to look at perceived parental differences based on Chinese studies, including some studies in Hong Kong (Dou et al., 2020). We searched different databases on Chinese parenting up to 2019 and examined perceived differences between fathers and mothers using pooled effect size (N = 55,759 adolescent participants). Consistent with our hypothesis, adolescents aged 11–18 perceived parenting attributes of mothers as more positive than paternal parenting attributes. However, additional analyses based on adolescent gender showed that the relatively positive perceptions of maternal parenting

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attributes relative to paternal parenting attributes existed in female adolescents only. This study clearly suggests that researchers should examine parental differences in parenting adolescent boys and girls separately.

Impact of Chinese Parenting on Child Developmental Outcomes In many cross-sectional studies based on Chinese adolescents, the general conclusion is that parenting and child development are positively related (Shek & Law, 2019). However, there are two weaknesses in some studies. As the sample size was small, it is difficult to generalize the findings. Longitudinal studies are sparse, making it difficult to understand the predictive effect of parenting over time. As such, we focus on a recent study with a large sample size (Chan et al., 2017) to examine this issue. In the consultancy study conducted by Chan et al. (2017), we can extract several observations on the impact of parenting on child developmental outcomes. First, while there were positive relationships between parental warmth and overall family parental warmth and positive child outcomes (prosocial behavior, physical health, behavior and academic competence and school motivation), parental warmth was negatively related to behavioral and psychological problems in children aged 3–8. Second, the quality of relationship with one’s parents was positively associated with positive child developmental outcomes but negatively related to child behavioral and psychological. Third, dysfunctional parenting practices were negatively linked to positive child development (e.g., school motivation) but positively related to negative child development (e.g., psychological problems). Finally, parenting stress was negatively related to child problems but positively related to positive child outcome indicators. The researchers also found similar findings in children aged 9–14. Parental warmth was positively related to positive child developmental indicators (prosocial behavior, self-esteem, physical health, academic self-concept, and learning competence) but negatively associated with behavioral and psychological problems. There were positive outcomes between parent-child relationships and positive child developmental indicators (prosocial behavior, self-esteem, physical health, academic selfconcept, learning competence). Different measures of parent-child relationships were negatively related to negative child developmental outcomes. Parental stress and dysfunctional parenting were negatively associated with positive child developmental outcomes but positively associated with child behavioral and psychological problems. Chan et al. (2017) showed that there were significant relationships between parental control and child developmental outcomes in children aged 9–14. Overall parental psychological controls were positively related to prosocial behavior and self-esteem and to child behavioral and psychological problems. The finding that

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there were positive relationships between parental psychological control and positive child indicators is not in line with the mainstream scientific literature that psychological control is detrimental to child development. However, the findings are at odds with the idea that psychological control is not strongly correlated with child developmental outcomes, and this probably is because Chinese adolescents may interpret psychological control as signs of parental love and concern (Shek, 2006a). In the Project P.A.T.H.S., based on longitudinal data collected from 2669 students in early adolescence, we found that behavioral control and psychological control were associated with different adolescent developmental problems. For adolescent substance abuse, Shek et al. (2020) found that parental behavioral control negatively predicted substance abuse at Wave 1. A higher maternal behavioral control predicted a slower development in substance abuse. Another study (Shek et al., 2018) found that parental control was significantly related to adolescent Internet addiction in junior high school students (N = 3328 in Grade 7). While behavioral control of fathers and mothers negatively predicted adolescent Internet addiction at Wave 1, paternal behavioral control was positively related to an increase in adolescent Internet addiction. While psychological control of both parents positively predicted adolescent IA at Wave 1, psychological control of mothers predicted a faster drop of IA over time. Using the same dataset, Shek et al. (2019e) examined the relationships between parental behavioral and psychological control and Internet addiction in senior secondary school students. While behavioral control of fathers negatively predicted the initial level of IA, it predicted a slower drop in IA over time. On the other hand, although higher maternal psychological control predicted higher initial IA level, it was associated with a faster drop of IA over time. Regarding the linkage between parental control and adolescent delinquency, Shek and Zhu (2019) found that parental behavioral control predicted lower Wave 1 delinquent behavior but paternal behavioral control positively predicted a delinquency growth trajectory. In contrast, paternal and maternal psychological control was not related to the level and rate of change in adolescent delinquency. We should differentiate three issues when examining parenting impact on child delinquency: delinquency level versus rate of change across time, different parenting factors, and fathers versus mothers. In a related study focusing on how adolescent delinquency trajectory in late adolescence is related to trajectories of parental control, Zhu and Shek (2021) discovered that psychological control of both parents was positively related to adolescent delinquency level at Wave 1, whereas both parents’ behavioral control was negatively linked to adolescent delinquency at the initial level. Decreased parental behavioral control, but not parental psychological control, was associated with increased adolescent delinquency. Adolescent delinquency and paternal behavioral control trajectories co-developed in senior high school years. The above studies suggest several points. First, it is noteworthy that the findings in Hong Kong are not entirely in line with Western findings. For example, Shek and Zhu (2019) did not find support for the negative impact of parental psychological

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control on adolescent delinquency. Shek et al. (2019e) also concluded that higher behavioral control of fathers was related to an increase in adolescent Internet addiction over time. Second, the impact of behavioral and psychological control varies across indicators. For example, while Shek et al. (2020) reported that maternal behavioral control was associated with adolescent substance abuse in a negative manner, no similar effect was found for Internet addiction (Shek et al., 2019e). Third, influences of parenting on adolescent delinquency and substance abuse appear to vary across different adolescent stages. When considering parenting impact on child development, there is a need to differentiate levels and rates of change in the outcome measures, different indicators of outcomes, and differential influence of fathers and mothers, and the specific stages of adolescence under focus (Shek, 2006b).

Future Research Directions There are several research directions regarding parenting practice in Hong Kong. There is a need to understand parenting practice in parents with different backgrounds. On top of poverty and non-intact family structure as risk factors for dysfunctional family practice (Shek, 2008a, b), we should understand parenting practice in different ethnic groups in Hong Kong. Interestingly, although economic disadvantage is a risk factor for parenting problems, it is important to look at parenting practice in middle class families because these families commonly employ foreign domestic helpers in child rearing tasks. The latest statistics show that there are more than 400,000 foreign domestic helpers in Hong Kong. It is also important to study parenting practice under COVID-19. With social distancing under the pandemic, parents and children usually stayed at home. This change will definitely have an impact on parenting such as supervising children to take online classes and monitoring children’s involvement in online games. With economic burdens such as reduction of income, it is important to understand how families are affected by such changes (Shek, 2021). Theoretically, we should also understand the independent and interactive effects of different aspects of parenting on different dimensions of child development. For example, different dimensions of parental control may interact to shape adolescent wellbeing. In a recent study about the impact of parental behavioral control and psychological control on adolescent well-being (N = 2369), Leung and Shek (2020) showed that behavioral control and psychological control of fathers interacted to influence life satisfaction in adolescents. Relative to the low paternal psychological control condition, the impact of paternal behavioral control on child outcome was stronger under a high paternal psychological control condition. Besides, paternal psychological control and maternal psychological control moderated the influence of paternal behavioral control on adolescent depression. Research on over-parenting in Chinese parents also deserves attention. In their pioneer study, Leung and Shek (2018b) validated the Chinese Overparenting Scale that showed eight dimensions, including parental surveillance, parental intrusion,

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high expectation of academic excellence, over-emphasis on learning activities, constant comparison of one’s child with other children, anticipatory problem solving, too much care, and over-affective involvement. Leung and Shek (2019) provided evidence to support the factorial structure and invariance of this measure. Using the Chinese Parenting Scale, Leung et al. (2020b) reported that there were positive relationships between parental overparenting and adolescent egocentrism and positive developmental outcomes in a sample of 1735 Grade 7 students in Hong Kong, with father-child conflict serving as a moderator of the linkage between maternal overparenting and child developmental outcomes. As this field is still in its infancy and in view of the stereotypes of “tiger moms”, we have to examine the phenomenon of overparenting in the Chinese culture. Methodologically, researchers should strengthen the research design of the studies in this field. First, to understand changes in parenting, regular implementation of parenting surveys is indispensable. Such data can help to understand parenting phenomena in a more dynamic manner, and they can help with the development of family policies. Second, collection of longitudinal data based on the same sample is important for understanding the causal effect of parenting on adolescent developmental outcomes. Longitudinal family studies are inadequate in Hong Kong. Third, as most of the existing parenting measures used in Hong Kong are translated Western measures, we should develop locally valid parenting measures in Hong Kong. In particular, development of Chinese parenting scales utilizing indigenous Chinese parenting concepts would help to provide culturally sensitive measures of parenting. Fourth, there is a need to conduct qualitative studies to understand parenting practice in Hong Kong. It would be exciting to conduct long-term qualitative case studies to understand parenting practice over time. We need more research on evidence-based parenting programs Shek & Lee, 2006. Some parenting programs using principles of social learning approach targeting behavioral management have been developed, including the Happy Parenting Program (Leung et al., 2016) and Hands-On Parent Empowerment-20 (Leung et al., 2017). Leung et al. (2020a) examined the effectiveness of the Round-the-Clock Parenting Programs adopting emotion coaching for parents in Macau on shift work. Results showed that the adopted parenting programs were able to promote positive family and child behavior. The Positive Parenting Program (Triple P, Leung et al., 2003) has also been adopted by the Family Health Service of the Hong Kong Government. There is a need to understand the predictors influencing the implementation of the related programs, such as program content, process of intervention and related policies. Family researchers and practitioners should understand the impact of the related parenting programs on family, parental and child behavior. We desperately need more research to consolidate parenting programs in Hong Kong. There is also a need to conduct research on parenting and family policies in Hong Kong. Chan et al. (2017) outlined 25 recommendations on parenting in Hong Kong. How to carry through these recommendations requires clear and systematic family and parenting policies. We need to understand the impact of government policies on family, including parenting practice. Recently, the Government of the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region implemented the Family Impact Assessment to

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understand how new government policies may impact the family, including parenting practice. For example, changes in the primary and high school curricula would affect student workload, which would further influence the monitoring behavior of parents. Changes in housing policy (e.g., building new housing estates in remote areas of Hong Kong) would affect the working patterns of parents which would eventually alter their parenting behavior. How to devise healthy family and parenting policies would be of paramount importance to shape healthy parenting practice in Hong Kong. Despite the increase in parenting research in Hong Kong in the past two decades, there is still a need to step up parenting research in Hong Kong (Shek & Yu, 2011).

Life as a Hong Kong Parent While we can try to understand parenthood in Hong Kong from a research perspective, it is equally important to understand the lives of Hong Kong parents. Being parents in Hong Kong is a satisfying experience. Culturally speaking, having children is regarded as a blessing in traditional Chinese culture. Being a parent is also regarded as an experience that can enrich the fullness of one’s life. Having several generations within a family is also regarded as a blessing in contemporary Hong Kong. Although parents normally do not regard having children as insurance for one’s aging, adult children (particularly daughters) normally play a caregiving role for their aging parents. On the other hand, Hong Kong parents also experience much stress in the parenting process. There are several factors contributing to this stressful parenting experience. First, because of the high property prices in Hong Kong, the living space of ordinary families in Hong Kong is small. Having children means the need for more physical space and financial resources. To cope with the family financial burden, women have to work. As a result, child rearing burdens are an issue. For those with support from the grandparents, the common problem encountered is disagreements in parenting. For those with more financial resources, they may employ domestic helpers. This has been very difficult under COVID-19 because of the quarantine requirement. Perhaps the greatest parenting stress in Hong Kong parents is related to their children’s academic study. With so much emphasis on academic achievement, parents wrestle with their children on getting good grades and getting admitted to the better schools. Many parents spend much time taking care of their children’s homework after work and supervising their children for tests and dictations during the weekend. One nightmare of parents in Hong Kong is that their children cannot get good grades in public examinations. What happens when the children get older? Hong Kong is a very competitive society that strongly emphasizes achievement. Parents have to struggle between urging their children to get a good job or accepting their children’s lack of success (in a materialistic sense). As the price of property in Hong Kong is really high, it is

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not possible for young people to have a stable accommodation when they plan for their marriage unless their parents offer financial help. Again, parents experience financial stress arising from their own retirement and satisfying the financial needs of their children. Acknowledgements This work was financially supported by Wofoo Foundation and the Research Matching Fund of the Research Grants Council (R-ZH4Q). Address all correspondence to Daniel T. L. Shek, Department of Applied Social Sciences, The Hong Kong Polytechnic University, Hunghom, Kowloon, Hong Kong ([email protected]).

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Shek, D. T. L. (2006a). Assessment of perceived parental psychological control in Chinese adolescents in Hong Kong. Research on Social Work Practice, 16(4), 382–391. https://doi. org/10.1177/1049731506286231 Shek, D. T. L. (2006b). Chinese family research: Puzzles, progress, paradigms, and policy implications. Journal of Family Issues, 27(3), 275–284. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X05283508 Shek, D. T. L. (2007). A longitudinal study of perceived differences in parental control and parentchild relational qualities in Chinese adolescents in Hong Kong. Journal of Adolescent Research, 22(2), 156–188. https://doi.org/10.1177/0743558406297509 Shek, D. T. L. (2008a). Economic disadvantage, perceived family life quality, and emotional wellbeing in Chinese adolescents: A longitudinal study. Social Indicators Research, 85(2), 169–189. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11205-007-9087-5 Shek, D. T. L. (2008b). Perceived parental control processes, parent-child relational qualities, and adolescent psychological well-being in intact and non-intact families: Longitudinal findings in the Chinese culture. Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, 49(1–2), 171–189. https://doi.org/10. 1080/10502550801973187 Shek, D. T. L. (2021). COVID-19 and quality of life: Twelve reflections. Applied Research Quality Life, 16(1), 1–11. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11482-020-09898-z Shek, D. T. L., & Dou, D. (2020). Perceived parenting and parent-child relational qualities in fathers and mothers: Longitudinal findings based on Hong Kong adolescents. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(11), 4083. https://doi.org/10.3390/ ijerph17114083 Shek, D. T. L., & Law, M. Y. M. (2019). Parenting in contemporary Hong Kong: Observations and reflections. International Journal of Child and Adolescent Health, 12(4), 391–402. Shek, D. T. L., & Lee, B. M. (2006). Development of a positive youth development program: Helping parents to improve their parenting skills. The Scientific World Journal, 6, 388–396. https://doi.org/10.1100/tsw.2006.76 Shek, D. T. L., & Siu, A. M. H. (2019). “UNHAPPY” environment for adolescent development in Hong Kong. Journal of Adolescent Health, 64(6), S1–S4. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jadohealth. 2019.01.007 Shek, D. T. L., & Sun, R. C. F. (2014). Parenting in Hong Kong: Traditional Chinese cultural roots and contemporary phenomena. In Parenting across cultures: Childrearing, motherhood and fatherhood in non-Western cultures (pp. 25-38). Springer. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-94-0077503-9_3. Shek, D. T. L., & Yu, L. (2011). A review of validated youth prevention and positive youth development programs in Asia. International Journal of Adolescent Medicine and Health, 23(4), 317–324. https://doi.org/10.1515/ijamh.2011.028 Shek, D. T. L., & Zhu, X. (2019). Paternal and maternal influence on delinquency among early adolescents in Hong Kong. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 16(8), 1338. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph16081338 Shek, D. T. L., Zhu, X., & Ma, C. M. S. (2018). The influence of parental control and parent-child relational qualities on adolescent internet addiction: A 3-year longitudinal study in Hong Kong. Frontiers in Psychology, 9, 642. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.00642 Shek, D. T. L., Kwong, W. M., Zhu, X., & Yang, Z. (2019a). Gendered expectation towards sons and daughters in Chinese parents in Hong Kong. International Journal of Child and Adolescent Health, 12(4), 357–368. Shek, D. T. L., Lam, C. M., & Yang, Z. (2019b). Division of labor in parenting amongst Chinese parents in Hong Kong. International Journal of Child and Adolescent Health, 12(4), 369–378. Shek, D. T. L., Lam, C. M., & Zhu, X. (2019c). Parental expectations amongst Chinese parents in Hong Kong: Profiles and demographic correlates. International Journal of Child and Adolescent Health, 12(4), 345–356.

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Shek, D. T. L., To, S. M, & Dou, D. (2019d). Parental beliefs about parental roles and responsibilities in Chinese parents: Pioneer findings. International Journal of Child and Adolescent Health, 12(4), 379–390. Shek, D. T. L., Zhu, X., & Dou, D. (2019e). Influence of family processes on internet addiction among late adolescents in Hong Kong. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 10, 113. https://doi.org/10.3389/ fpsyt.2019.00113 Shek, D. T. L., Zhu, X., Dou, D., & Chai, W. (2020). Influence of family factors on substance use in early adolescents: A longitudinal study in Hong Kong. Journal of Psychoactive Drugs, 52(1), 66–76. https://doi.org/10.1080/02791072.2019.1707333 Zhu, X., & Shek, D. T. L. (2021). Parental control and adolescent delinquency based on parallel process latent growth curve modeling. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 18, 8916. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph18178916

Daniel T. L. Shek (PhD, BBS, SBS, JP, FHKPS) is Associate Vice President (Undergraduate Programme), Chair Professor of Applied Social Sciences, and Li and Fung Professor in Service Leadership Education at The Hong Kong Polytechnic University, Hong Kong, P.R.C. (daniel. [email protected]) Rachel Sun (PhD) is a psychologist with research interests in positive youth development, student well-being and education. ([email protected]) Janet T. Y. Leung (PhD) is Associate Professor, Department of Applied Social Sciences, The Hong Kong Polytechnic University, Hong Kong, P.R.C. ([email protected]) Moon Law (DSW) is Lecturer, Department of Social Work, The Chinese University of Hong Kong, Hong Kong, P.R.C. ([email protected]).

Vietnamese Parenting in the Digital Age Son Duc Nguyen, Huyen Bui Thi Thu, and Phuoc Hoang Anh

Current Parenting Style in Vietnam 8,9 X Parents In this chapter, people who have children born in the digital age (in the first half of Gen Z time, 1997–2012; from 9 to 24 years old) are considered parents of Millennials or Gen Y (1981 to 1996, aging 25–40) and the last component of Gen X (born from 1978 to 1980, aging 42–44) (Pew Research Center). The period of 1980–1990 experienced key turning points in Vietnam. Economic reform in the 1980s, with the acceptance of a market economy as well as the openness to cultural and economic exchange, brought about breakthroughs in regard to our national economy, leading to changing the whole society. Currently, Vietnam is a developing country with medium income and widespread economic integration. One of the greatest areas of change is the integration into the digital world, which has made a strong impact on the way parents of 8,9 X generations educate their children.

Parenting Style In Vietnam, recent studies linked with parenting style have been carried out with theoretical models from developed countries. For instance, a common model is the four parenting styles of authoritarian, uninvolved, permissive, and authoritative (Coleman, 2001). Another model is the theory by Diana Baumrind with three elements: support, behavioral control and psychological control (Baumrind, 1971).

Son Duc Nguyen (*) · Huyen Bui Thi Thu · Phuoc Hoang Anh Hanoi National University of Education, Hanoi, Vietnam e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_11

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Previous works have been based on a quality assessment model between parents and children, which was introduced by Shek et at. (PCSQS: Parent-Child subsystem quality scale-2016). The surveyed parents chose authoritative as their typical education style (about 70–80%) (Vu Thi Khanh Linh, 2012). The percentage of mothers with this style was higher than that of fathers. The second choice was free style, accounting for 11.5%. The rest of the participants chose the authoritarian style. Parents with an authoritative style have a warm and friendly relationship with their children; they encourage, motivate and support their children. They encourage their children to share their worries and troubles and sympathize with their children’s sadness. They respond to their children’s emotions and demands and praise them and pay attention to their wishes. They care about their children’s involvement in family decision making and show their respect for children’s ideas by motivating them to express their opinions. These qualities take priority over hierarchy and obedience and are completely different from the daily behavior and education styles of conventional families in Vietnam. That form of behavior is optimistic, sharing their parents’ feelings about good and bad behaviors, explaining the effects of their behaviors, and encouraging the children to discuss the impacts of their behaviors so that they can be aware of arising problems. With regards to the authoritative style, there is no difference between mothers and fathers. Parents having an authoritarian style often lose the balance between support and control. They use their authority to set high requirements for their children and tend to maintain strict control, particularly in terms of their psychology. Fathers seem to be more authoritative than mothers, especially in urban areas, which is partially due to the influence of culture. Traditionally, fathers are paternalistic and they expect obedience from their wives and children. They assume that strict discipline (beating, punishment, etc.) is an effective teaching method. “I force my child to obey my rules because if I am pliable one time only, he will talk back to me” or “I will punish him to face up with the wall. In my family, there must be hierarchy, whatever parents say, children must follow”. Parents with a free style often lose the balance between support and control. They give so much support that they find it hard to control their children. They are incapable of establishing boundaries. Though sometimes these parents set rules, they rarely put them into effect. They tend to be easily compromised and forgive their children’s bad behavior. In general, the free style accounts for a small proportion among parents. There are two reasons for the difference in educating children in today’s world and those in the past. The grandparents and parents of 8X-9X generations were raised in a new environment, which had open and widespread interactions, bringing about chances of accessing modern perspectives and education styles. The Confucianism of hierarchy and obedience faded away. The lifestyle and psychology of these parents are very different from those of previous generations. The Vietnamese family model has transformed from extended families to nuclear families with more accesses to Western culture and religion. Therefore, parents tend to give less strict punishments (especially in the manner of

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insulting children) and more acceptance of their childrens’ personal values (Mestechkina et al., 2014). Although parents of Gen Y are quite open to modern aspects in the society, they are still under the influence of the beliefs of the traditional education style (Chen & Luster, 2002).

Parents’ Expectation on Children With the transformation from extended to nuclear families, the common number of children is now two per household. Children receive more investment and expectations from their parents and family members, although these expectations are affected by traditional values. Children are usually expected to bring honour to their families and to attain what their parents want, which is regarded as one way to show their gratitude. Neighbours often ask about their children’s school reputation, academic performance, and ranking and make comparisons with cousins or other children. Many parents believe that inspiring children with high expectations is one way to help them improve their confidence and self-respect, which helps them understand standards of personal and life values and causes them to feel motivated to develop themselves. Parents wish their children to be nice, dutiful, have good personalities, study well, have stable jobs, earn a lot of money, and maintain a good social postion and a happy family (Bui Dinh Tuan, 2015).

Expectations of Academic Performance Among different expectations of parents, that of academic performance is the most common, which stays with children from childhood to maturity. In most families in Vietnam, parents hope their children will be excellent students and have a high ranking and win prizes. These achievements help them to be successful and have a high position in society. Many parents consider academic scores as the standard to assess their children’s performance. Parents usually put children under great pressure in studying. In addition to classes at school, children take part in supplementary classes in the evening or the weekends, or during holidays. Then, instead of enjoying themselves by relaxing after a stressful studying time, children participate in extra classes as planned by their parents. This pressure becomes greater when children move to a new educational level, especially preparing for the university entrance examination (grade 12). Many parents do not allow their children to do housework so that they spend all their time learning. They might also keep reminding their children to study. When their expectations are not fulfilled, parents express their anger by threatening, shouting, punishing and comparing the children with those getting higher scores. Some parents consider academic scores as a condition for meeting their basic needs to make them study. As a result, children are affected both physically and

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psychologically. There are both positive and negative aspects of parents’ expectations on their children’s performance. Although they can improve children’s achievement, overexpectations might cause damage to the children and decrease their study results (Murayama & Pekrun, 2016).

Expectations About Future Occupations Vietnamese parents usually wish their children to attend leading schools with a popular major so that they can easily find jobs, earn high salaries and meet social needs. Many parents hope their children can improve their family’s career path by learning its traditional job. In this case, after their graduation, children are expected to inherit their family’s tradition and develop their ancestors’ careers. However, many parents hold inappropriate expectations regarding their children’s dreams. They hope that their children can secure excellent jobs like doctors or engineers whereas these children might want to become singers, artists or tour guides. This contradiction results in great pressure on children because they have to persuade their parents to pursue their passions. Sometimes the children fail in achieving their parents’ dreams although they tried their best. This possibly causes negative consequences when they cannot find happiness and interest in their study and future jobs.

Pressure of Parents’ Expectation on Children In Vietnamese families, parents want their children to study well so that they can have a good future, which also makes them proud in front of their relatives and neighbors. The success of children is regarded as the greatest gratitude to their parents. This results in strong pressure, forcing many parents to find different ways to make children achieve what their parents want. When children are in school, their parents always create the best physical and mental conditions so that they can have time to study and train themselves to achieve their parents’ wishes (Bui Dinh Tuan, 2015). From another perspective, parents’ expectations have become a trap to confine their children’s dreams. Sometimes parents do not give an accurate evaluation of their children’s competences when they expect their chidren to achieve targets they have not been able or they are unable to do. These parents criticize and punish children when they fail. Chiildren are always under physical and metal stress, as they are responsible for their parents’ satisfaction (Nguyen Thi Nhan Ai & To Thi Hoan, 2014). From a positive perspective, parents’ expectations might build up their children’s motivation to work harder and develop themselves. This could be considered the first guideline to help children set their goals and pursue their dreams. However, if

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children fail in achieving these targets, they might easily feel sadness, self-deprecation, and depression. Also, it is possible their academic results would decrease, or they might study below their competence level; they might have opposing behaviors and negative response to their parents’ requirements. Overexpectations might create a big gap in the relationship between parents and children because they cannot find a place of mutual understanding. This could lead to problems in family and social relationships. In exceptional cases, children might suffer from mental disorders like depression and worries. According to research by the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF), about 8%–29% of adolescents in Vietnam have mental problems. It is estimated that in this country, there are at least three million adolescents with mental health difficulties. One possible reason leading to this reality is pressure from parents (Samuels et al., 2018). In Vietnam, parents do not really understand their children’s needs; they force their children to pursue their own ideologies and put too much pressure on them. This comes from the Eastern assumption that it is an obligation to obey parents and good children are those who obey their parents. When children are compared with others, or forced to follow a model, they might suppose that they have no value. This could lead to mental and psychological effects (Le Van Hao, 2020).

Parents’ Difficulties in Educating Children in the Internet Age Internet in Vietnam: Popularity and Accessibility of Children The Internet appeared in Vietnam at the end of 1997, which was quite late compared to other parts of the world. After 10 years, there were 64 million users, accounting for 67% of the national population, making Vietnam 12th in the world and sixth among 35 nations/territories in Asia (Internetworldstats, 2017). In 2020, Vietnam was evaluated as one among 20 countries having the highest number of Internet users worldwide, with 68.17 million users (70% of population) compared with the average rate of the world (59.5%) and that of the Southeast Asia (69%). Nearly 94% of Vietnamese people regularly use the Internet up to 6 hours/day, according to a report by the Ministry of Information and Communications in 2020. In 2021, among 97.75 million people, the percentage of Internet users from 14–64 years old was 68.72 million, and the number of social network users was 72 million. The most popular applications include messenger (94.7%) and social network sites (94.5%), which were followed by videos and entertainment (83%), shopping (68%), music (66.1%) and games (57.2%). The most commonly accessed social network sites were YouTube (92%), Facebook (91.7%), Zalo (76.5%), Instagram (53.5%) and Tiktok (47.6%). In the age group of 16–64, people from 24–35 years old were found to use the Internet most (16.3%), which was followed by young people, 18–24 years old (12.5%) (Annual report “Digital 2021” by WeAreSocial and Hootsuite).

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Another survey by DKAP (Digital Kids Asia-Pacific) on children and digital technology in the Asia Pacific area, conducted in 20 provinces in Vietnam, showed that most students in this country began to use the Internet when they were 9–12 years old (42%) at the time when they started learning information technology at school, which was followed by 12–15-year-old children (28%).

Challenges for Parents to Educate Children in the Digital Age Changes in the socioeconomic culture in the time of Internet explosion set out challenges for parents in educating their children. Vietnamese children tend to be especially affected by Western culture, values and lifestyles (Mestechkina et al., 2014). Children in the age of digital technology (Gen Z) tend to be more familiar with online games and interactive software. Their skill is quite high (Nguyen Phi Van, 2009). However, parents are not always so familiar with these modern technologies, which leads to misunderstanding between the two generations (Do Hanh Nga, 2006). Traditional Vietnamese parents are worried about the negative impact of the community on their children and ask their children to obey their rules and restrict them in certain kinds of friendships to avoid negative influences (Nguyen & Ho, 1995). It is easy to understand the worry of modern parents about their children’s access to available information on the social networks. The Internet use limit they set might make their children feel uncomfortable, which sometimes leads to behavior such as obeying in front of their parents but completely going their own way when the parents are not there. Technological devices together with the Internet often result in distancing and poor relationships between parents and children. The key problem derives from the fact that parents spend less time with their children. They lack interaction and communication. There are parents who neither regulate time use for technological devices nor pay attention to or control what their children watch. This results in Internet overuse, making children dependent on technological devices. Also, parents themselves spend too much time using the Internet and joining social network sites. When parents and children communicate less with each other, they no longer understand and provide appropriate support for one another. Thus, parents might have expectations and use discipline not acceptable to their children. Inappropriate educating style is another big challenge in the relationship between parents and children. Some current parents were raised with the authoritative style and tend to apply the same style in educating their children. Their violation of their children’s privacy might damage their relationship with their children, leading to lack of consideration and causing coercion in the adolescents (Coleman, 2001). These adolescents belong to Gen Z and like freedom and respectful self-esteem. The inappropriateness in style, which is either authoritative or indulgent, could become a big challenge in establishing good relationships between parents and children. Parents’ limited essential knowledge and skills in using technology might cause

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difficulty in their relationships. A report by UNICEF, “Children in the world of digital technology”, indicated that 72% of Vietnamese adolescents use the Internet. Those at the age of 18 appreciate online safety and are well aware of risks from Internet abuse (UNICEF, 2015). The same report also stated that every half second, there is a child joining the Internet. This leads to increasing risk like playing dangerous games or being bullied or abused. Moreover, available access to the Internet means surfing websites with high risks in terms of gender education and sexuality. Vietnamese parents are not open to discussing sexuality with their children (Anh et al., 2008). The Internet can be considered a convenient source of information for children to identify and practice sexuality (McKenna et al., 2001). Therefore, parents must change their perceptions to instruct their children to use social networks and the Internet in general in a safe manner. The imbalance between parents’ economic and life pressures and their time, care, and support for their children is another challenge for parenthood in Vietnam today. Modern life with greater expenses makes parents work overtime and do many tasks. Many of them have to work far from home. As a result, the relationship between parents and children is affected to some extent. Long-term absence might be regarded as a signal of lacking love (Webber, 2002). The requirements of modern life together with the physical and psychological changes of children make parents face challenges in not only updating their knowledge about digital platforms and social networks to understand more about their children, but also equipping themselves with communication skills to become friends with their children. These pressures sometimes cause mental exhaustion.

Parents’ Responses to Challenges In Vietnam, there have not been any specific studies with evidence showing parents’ responses to challenges in educating their children. There is a limited number of Vietnamese parents seeking support from psychologists and the community about solutions to their stress (D’Antonio & Shin, 2009). However, based on discussions and conversations with participants and consultation with articles in the mass media, common responses of Vietnamese parents to stress and challenges in educating children can be presented as follows. According to Neville et al. (1998), there are different strategies to solve conflicts, which could be performed by the adolescents themselves, or parents themselves, or both, or by the whole family, or by any combination among these subjects. One possible solution to conflict is positive listening (Neville et al., 1998). The relationship between parents and children in Vietnam is greatly influenced by cultural factors, so to solve problems between parents and children, parents need to change. Parents of Gen Z children often realize their limited knowledge about making friends with their children, so they search for information by reading books, consulting experts and taking part in courses on parenting organized by life skill organizations and centers. Nowadays, modern parents agree that parenting is a job. So, like other

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jobs, it requires learning, knowledge and skills. This is a good way of facing the problem rather than ignoring it. Research evidence showed that generally, parents in Southeast Asia control children more, which might lead to further distance (Dinh et al., 1994). Their communication is often one way, from the parents to the children (Morrow, 1989). The traditional Vietnamese family believed in Confucianism, which played a key role in all aspects of life (Leung & Boehnlein, 1996; Mestechkina et al., 2014). This might be the reason for common contradictions between parents and children. On the national television channel in Vietnam, there is a reality show called “Changing Parents” which describes typical conflicts and challenges of being modern parents. In this program, parents are helped by the Consultant Board to identify problems in educating their children and to train them to change their emotions to understand their children so that their relationship can be improved. Parents must learn to understand their children, to control their emotions and behavior, to listen and to share. According to Small and Eastman (1991), it is important that parents understand their role. They should not only meet the basic needs of their children but also instruct and support their children in their development. Parents can show their positive roles, establish boundaries and listen to their children to solve conflicts.

Conclusion In traditional Vietnamse families, children’s piety means complying and making efforts to obey parents without any objection or conflict. This is the reason why some parents cannot understand the differences between their expectations and their children’s capabilities. However, in the context of international integration and rapid socio-economic development, the current educating style of modern parents has greatly changed. They are trying to respect their children and consider their motivations and encourage them. Nevertheless, it is hard to completely eliminate the force of Eastern culture. The digital social context sets new challenges for parents to give suitable responses to better educate their children. Parenting can be a hard job for everyone.

References Anh, D. Ngo., Michael, W. R., & Eric, A. R. (2008). Internet influences on sexual practices among young people in Hanoi, Vietnam. Culture, Health & Sexuality. An International Journal for Research, Intervention and Care, 10. Baumrind, D. (1971). Current patterns of parental authority. Developmental Psychology, 4(1), 1–130.

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Bui Dinh Tuan. (2015). Parents’ expectations of their children’s success. In Proceedings of the scientific conference “Supporting school mental health from research, training to practice”. University of Education-University of Danang, 186–197. Chen, F.-M., & Luster, T. (2002). Factors related to parenting practices in Taiwan. Early Child Development and Care, 172(5), 413–430. https://doi.org/10.1080/03004430214549 Coleman, J. (2001). The needs of parents and teenagers. In J. Coleman & D. Roker (Eds.), Supporting parents of teenagers: A handbook for professionals (pp. 22–34). Jessica Kingsley Publishers. D’Antonio, E., & Shin, J. Y. (2009). Families of children with intellectual disabilities in Vietnam: Emerging themes. In R. M. Hodapp (Ed.), International review of research in mental retardation (p. 93). Academic. Dinh, T. K., Sarason, R. B., & Sarason, G. I. (1994). Parent-child relationships in Vietnamese immigrant families. Journal of Family Psychology, 8(4), 471–488. Do Hanh Nga. (2006). Factors affecting psychological conflict between parents and secondary students about the need for independence. Ho Chi Minh City University of Education’s journal of Science, 7. Le Van Hao. (2020). Parents' conceptions and expectations in educating children of secondary school. Ministry- level scientific project chaired by the. Institute of Psychology Institute. Leung, K. P., & Boehnlein, J. (1996). Vietnamese families. In M. McGodrick, J. Giordano, & J. K. Pearce (Eds.), Ethnicity and family therapy (pp. 295–306). The Guilford Press. McKenna, K., Green, A., & Smith, P. (2001). Demarginalising the sexual self. Journal of Sex Research, 38, 302–311. Mestechkina, T., Son, N. D., & Shin, J. Y. (2014). Parenting in Vietnam. In H. Selin (Ed.), Parenting across cultures. Science across cultures: The history of non-Western science (Vol. 7). Springer. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-94-007-7503-9_5 Ministry of Information and Communications. (2020). http://baochinhphu.vn/Utilities/PrintView. aspx?distributionid=417161 Morrow, R. D. (1989). Southeast Asian child rearing practices: Implications for child & youth care workers. Child & Youth Care Quarterly, 18(4), 273–287. Murayama, K., & Pekrun, R. (2016). Don’t aim too high for your kids: Parental overaspiration undermines students’ learning in mathematics. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology., 111(5), 766–779. Neville, D., King, L., & Beak, D. (1998). Promoting positive parenting of teenagers. Routledge. Nguyen, V., & Ho, M. (1995). Vietnamese-Australian families. In R. Hartley & Allen & Unwin (Eds.), Families and cultural. Diversity in Australia. Australian Institute of Family Studies. Nguyen Phi Van. (2009). Me, the future and the world. World Publishing House. Nguyen Thi Nhan Ai & To Thi Hoan. (2014). The relationship between the parents’ expectation and level of psychological stress of high school students. In Proceedings of the scientific conference: Mental health in schools (pp. 593–609). Ho Chi Minh National University House Publishing. Pew Research Center. https://www.beresfordresearch.com/age-range-by-generation/ Samuels, F., Jones, N., & Gupta, T. (2018). Mental health and socio- psychology of children and adolescents at some provinces and cities in Vietnam. UNICEF Vietnam. Small, S., & Eastman, G. (1991). Rearing adolescents in contemporary society. Family Relations, 40, 455–462. UNICEF. (2015). Summary report on mental health and sociopsychology of children and young people at some provinces and cities in Vietnam. Vu Thi Khanh Linh. (2012). The correlation between parents' educational style and teenager's active communication with parents. Doctoral thesis in Psychology, Hanoi National University of Education. WeAreSocial and Hootsuite. Annual Report “Digital 2021”. https://specials.laodong.vn/chuyendoi-so-tai-viet-nam-va-nhungthong-ke-an-tuong-2021/, https://www.kasasa.com/articles/gener ations/gen-x-gen-y-gen-z Webber, R. (2002). Vietnamese - Australian young people and illicit drug abuse in Melbourne: Generation gaps and fault lines. Youth Studies Australia, 21 (3), 17–24.

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Son Duc Nguyen is an associate professor in the Faculty of Psychology and Pedagogy, Hanoi National University of Education and the vice-president of the Vietnam Social Psychology Association. He has been conducting research in social psychology, personality psychology and in studies on Vietnamese students and teachers’ personalities. His publications focus on children’s personality traits and parents’ attitude to their education. Huyen Bui Thi Thu has a Ph.D. in psychology and is a lecturer in the Faculty of Psychology and Pedagogy, Hanoi National University of Education. She received her Ph.D. at the University of Bolton, UK with a thesis focusing on the emotional regulation of Vietnamese adolescents. She has worked as a collaborator in some cross cultural studies on psychological issues, such as international situational project and meta norms project. Her research interest focuses on school psychology and the emotional regulation of children and adolescents. Phuoc Hoang Anh has a Ph.D. in psychology and is a lecturer in the Faculty of Psychology and Pedagogy, Hanoi National University of Education (HNUE). She has research publications in school psychology, counseling skills and labor psychology. She has joined many projects from an institutional to ministry level, and she is the author of books and monographs on counseling skills and prevention gender-based violence for adolescents.

Sociocultural and Religious Context of Malay Parenting in Malaysia Ziarat Hossain and Zainal Madon

Sociocultural and Religious Context of Malay Parenting in Malaysia Global Views of Parenting and Malaysia Sociocultural and religious beliefs and practices have a strong influence on parenting behaviors across cultural communities. Based on its own ecological setting, each cultural community sets its expectations and practices of parenting roles and behaviors. Most research on parenting has primarily focused on parenting styles and attachment and their impact on various aspects of child development in Western families (Bornstein, 2019; Cummings & Warmuth, 2019; Oates et al., 2005; Roopnarine & Carter, 1992; Wille, 1995). However, international scholars such as cross-cultural psychologists, anthropologists, and sociologists have been playing a role in undertaking systematic parenting research in non-Western societies since the 1970s (Ashdown & Faherty, 2020; Hewlett & Winn, 2014; Roopnarine & Gielen, 2005). One important aspect of this research is to delineate the influence of unique developmental niches and ecological factors on parenting roles within a particular population. Although research in this area has been conducted in selected Asian societies such as India (Kakar, 1978; Roopnarine & Hossain, 1992; Selin, 2014), Japan (Hertog et al., 2021; Nakazawa, 2015; Shwalb & Shwalb, 1996), and South

Z. Hossain (✉) Department of Individual, Family and Community Education, University of New Mexico, Albuquerque, NM, USA e-mail: [email protected] Z. Madon Department of Human Development and Family Studies, Universiti Putra Malaysia, Selangor, Malaysia e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_12

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Korea (Hwang & Lee, 2021; Park & Kwon, 2009; Park & Walton-Moss, 2012), the sociocultural and religious analysis of the parenting roles in Malaysian families is limited. As a society, contemporary or post-industrial Malaysian parents function within a very diverse cultural, religious, social, and ecological setting that is profoundly grounded in precolonial or traditional Malay values and practices such as gender and age hierarchy in the family. Keeping recent socioeconomic development and technological changes and multifarious interactions and reformulations of these forces in mind, this chapter accounts how sociocultural and religious considerations sculpt parenting in post-industrial Malay families in Malaysia. The global view of parenting often chronicles Western values and practices of parenting roles that are based on the precepts of shared and/or equal parenting, recognition of single-parent families, individual choices and freedom, parental competence, discipline, gender equality, and child’s outcomes including the wellbeing and rights of children (Bornstein, 2019; Hoghughi & Long, 2004). The research findings have been typically explored within well-observed theoretical constructions such as attachment, biological, behavioral, and psycho-social theories. The key notions of these theories were constructed within the context of Western family lives to understand parenting dynamics within its norm-based functional and developmental parameters. For example, Baumrind’s (1966) conceptualization of the authoritative parenting style has been accepted to illustrate the baseline characteristics of parenting behavior and related child behavioral outcomes in North American and other Western families. The responsibilities and levels of parental involvement, parent-child interaction styles, and child outcomes including behaviors are based on negotiated social contracts and expectations that uphold parental authority as well as children’s rights and wellbeing. The interplay of love, care, reasoning, and rational decision-making construct the core context of the authoritative parenting style that results in a secure attachment in children. Both Western and non-Western parents who do not model authoritative parenting behaviors are portrayed as less adept and the notion that their children are at risk for developing insecure attachment (Karavasilis et al., 2003; Kim et al., 2021). The norm-based developmental expectation has created a dualistic interpretation for parenting in much of the contemporary world. For example, attachment theory suggests that children develop a secure attachment with one primary caregiver and this primary caregiver is typically the mother (Bowlby, 1958, 1979). Although the attachment theory underscores the importance of parenting in child development, it deemphasizes fathers’ importance as primary caregivers. Such a parting or bi-dimensional (e.g., mother vs. father; secure vs. insecure attachment), as well as the exclusionary sense of paternal role, disregard the culturally sanctioned extended network as well as combined effects of parental contributions to child development that is evident in many societies including indigenous communities (Hossain et al., 2011). It is critical to remember that most of the parenting theories (e.g., attachment, personality theory) incorporated in Western psychologies are not very sensitive to diverse eco-cultural contexts of parenting. These Western theories often reflect more on personal dysfunctions and shortcomings over the constructive human qualities of a parent. Furthermore, the universality aspect of these theories undermines the

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strengths of unique developmental niches and cultural variations of parenting styles and practices, especially in non-Western societies. However, based on empirical research data, the parental acceptance-rejection theory (Rohner & Khaleque, 2010; Kim et al., 2021) has established the notion that parental warmth and acceptance have a positive developmental impact on child development across Western and non-Western cultural communities. Existing scholarship and other information suggest that there are multiple contexts of parenting practices that evolve as a function of cultural, religious, and other ecological factors. We observe that parents are anxious about the wellness of their children as they often wonder whether they are following the right approach for the “normal” development of their children. Furthermore, most parenting information is about how to manage children and the available information hardly addresses parents’ inner struggles and other contextual variables that may act as inhibitors for parents to do parenting well. Despite all the efforts to help parents with childrearing, the contemporary globalized lifestyles are characterized by mounting life stresses, high and/or increasing divorce rates, economic hardship and polarization, lack of or unaffordable health care, and children’s unhappiness, loneliness, school failures, and other behavioral problems. These challenges push us to examine parenting issues from a diverse perspective that is responsive to people’s unique sociocultural footprints and religious beliefs. The primary objective of this chapter is to articulate how sociocultural and religious practices provide a complex yet holistic process of parenting in contemporary parenting in understudied Malay families in Malaysia. Although the existing models of parenting have contributed significantly to our understanding of parenting tasks, it is hard to define a fixed set of rules as “best” parenting practices that can be meaningfully used across societies. This chapter is an effort to introduce the state of Malay parenting in Malaysia and we believe that the information in this chapter will strengthen the parenting literature. The chapter elaborates on the following areas: sociodemographic trends and ethnic composition of Malaysian society, social and religious contexts of parenting roles in Malay families, and contemporary Malays and parenting.

Malaysian Society Sociodemographic Trends and Ethnic Composition About 33 million Malaysians reside in an area of 329,847 square kilometers (127,320 square miles) spread over Peninsular Malaysia (West Malaysia or Tanah Melayu) and Malaysian Borneo (East Malaysia). The country has a per capita GDP income of USD 29,340 and less than a 6% poverty rate. Labor statistics indicate that about 53% of Malaysians are employed in the service sectors, 11% work in agriculture, and 36% work in industry (Department of Statistics Malaysia, 2020). The labor data further suggest that a large imported labor force is employed in various industrial and agricultural sectors. Urban lifestyles have become a

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conspicuous family and social feature as about 77% of Malaysians are urban dwellers. These statistics suggest that Malaysia is a relatively well-off and developed society in Asia. Malays and Indigenous peoples (62%), Chinese (21%), Indians (6%), and foreigners (10%) reflect a diverse composition of the population. The Malays and the indigenous populations are commonly termed Bumiputras, or ‘sons of the soil’ (Kumaraswamy & Othman, 2011).

Malay Families Broadly speaking, Malays are Muslims, Chinese are either Buddhists or Christians, Indians are largely Hindus, and most of the indigenous peoples are animists. A Malaysian family is defined as a marital union or registration between a man and a woman, including their children and extended family members (Saad, 2001). Today, with a 1.7 total fertility rate (TFR), families are becoming nuclear and smaller in size, women are pursuing education and participating in the paid labor force, and divorce is contributing to the rise in female-headed households. Malays consider the extended family network as an inseparable part of the family composition and observe the collectivistic lifestyle that conserves interdependent family relationships (Kling, 1995). Because collectivism prioritizes group identity and wellbeing over individual benefit, the interdependent family relations and extended network commission multigenerational families that provide additional family members to support a parent to function (Hossain, 2014; Oshio et al., 2013). The hegemonic patriarchy and the age and gender hierarchies defend men’s authority and women’s docile, dutiful, and self-sacrificing roles in the family. The highly pronounced gender-differentiated parenting roles saddle mothers with childcare and household chores and socialize fathers to provide and protect the family.

Contexts and Parental Roles in Malay Families Adat and Islamic Values and Norms Arab traders and the Sahaba (Muslims who had direct contact with Prophet Muhammad) introduced Islam, the Abrahamic religion, to the Malay Archipelago in the seventh century and the Tamil Indian Muslims strengthened Islamic beliefs and practices in Malaysia in the twelfth century. Islamic rules are based on the Qur’an (Islamic holy book that is considered the source of Sharia Law) that scripts the direct words and commands from Allah (God) and the hadith that are the sayings and deeds of Prophet Muhammad. These rules support women’s rights to property and business ownership, leadership roles, and access to education and knowledge. They also underscore the importance of parents’ shared responsibilities in raising children and decision-making in other family matters that are in line with the notion of gender

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egalitarianism widely advocated in Western democracies (Hossain & Juhari, 2015). The Qur’anic principles forbid a forced marriage, equally value the man’s and the woman’s consent to marriage, and allow a woman to divorce her husband. Although (most) Malays are Muslims, they practice their social and cultural norms known as Adat. It is a customary value system that fosters family and societal norms of the individual as well as collective responsibilities and sets the moral value systems of personal and social conduct of the Malays (Abdullah et al., 2010). Adat guides social interactions, behavioral etiquette, and gender relations in the family and society. For example, it defines rules of family and social organizations that uphold men’s privileges in society and provisions of hegemonic patriarchy supporting men’s breadwinner role in the family (Karim, 1992). Adat also teaches children to be respectful of their parents and elders, use appropriate language in conversations, and not engage in social vices (e.g., smoking, drinking, fighting). The Adat and Islamic belief structures work together to institute a blended value system that patronizes patrilineal hierarchy with men’s provisioning, authority, and protective roles and yet recognizes women’s rights and respectful status in the family and society. At the same time, Malay parents subscribe to the notion of women’s primary role in childcare and family chores and the importance of extended family and flexible family boundaries (Hossain, 2014; Kling, 1995). We observe that a complex amalgamation between Adat and Islamic principles lay the basic foundation for negotiating parenting roles in Malay families. Although Islam advocates equality between men and women, Adat tolerates a punitive and patriarchal approach to women’s roles and rights in the family (Karmi, 1996; Riphenburg, 1998). Whereas religion empowers parents to teach children the importance of observing the five pillars of Islam, it also instructs parents to raise children within a warm, loving, and caring relationship. Adat is sensitive to regional variations in parental practices and sometimes interprets certain human acts or etiquette that may conflict with Islamic values. As indicated elsewhere, the intersectionality of Islamic law and Adat offers a diverse interpretation of women’s role and status in the family. But both value systems encourage mothers and fathers to invest resources to foster children’s wellbeing. Nevertheless, these two value systems co-exist and provide the basic formulas and pathways to Malay lifestyles. These two forces construct the basic context defining parental roles and expectations in Malay society. It is expected that Malay parents are mindful of these principles when they conceive and discharge parental roles as they attempt to socialize and inculcate these values in their children.

Parent-Child Socialization In addition to Adat and Islamic guidelines, parents and children function within a collectivistic sociocultural structure. The collectivistic orientation socializes children to develop interdependent identities and interactions that prioritize group wellbeing. Malay parents teach young children that an individual is embedded within the expanded structure of the family. Both the parent and the child are aware that the

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entire family faces negative consequences such as social isolation if the child violates any social or religious norms and expectations. Therefore, Malay parents assume an active role in instructing their children about cultural norms and family values, Islamic ideals, and social customs so that they grow up with proper social etiquette and religious training to be good Malay Muslims. Assisted by family members, community elders, and religious leaders, Malay parents apply and reinforce parenting roles in raising children. Parents act as indisputable agents of social learning for children to acquire sociocultural values and identities across cultural communities and the quality of parenting and family relationships help children develop secure attachments (Granqvist & Hagekull, 1999). These contentions and approaches are in line with Malay parents who play a significant role in inculcating social, cultural, and religious values in children. Based on the Adat and Islamic values, the primary goal of parentchild socialization for Malays is how to practice responsible parenting and achieve optimal child development outcomes such as filial piety (loyalty to the family and respect for parents) and build good moral character (honesty, kindness, respect). We elaborate on how parental characteristics (parenting style, education, gender) influence the dynamics of parent-child interaction and its impact on children’s growth and development in Malay families. Using Baumrind’s (1971) paradigm of parenting styles, a cross-ethnic Malaysian sample of university students showed that, unlike Indian participants who reported their parents to be authoritarian, Malay participants reported their parents as authoritative who showed high responsiveness and made high demands (Mofrad & Uba, 2014). The results further indicated that while female Malay respondents identified their parents as authoritative, male respondents identified parents as authoritarian and neglectful. Both authoritative and authoritarian parenting styles contributed to the development of children’s social skills. The authoritarian parenting style positively contributes to children’s academic and social development in collectivistic Asian and in some Western families such as African-Americans that value extended family networks (Baumrind, 1972). Malay parents put high demands on children to be loyal to the family, obedient to authority figures, and respect elders and others in the family, and yet parents balance this high demand with a high level of responsiveness to meet children’s material, emotional, and other needs. Other findings suggested whereas authoritarian fathers’ socialization negatively influenced the development of children’s internal locus of control, fathers’ education mediated the negative influence of authoritative parenting styles on child development (Keshavarz & Baharudin, 2009). Furthermore, the positive quality of maternal parenting (warmth, consistent discipline, monitoring) registered a positive influence on both male and female children’s educational achievement in Malay families (Baharudin et al., 2014). Malay parents communicate and guide children to learn the importance of filial piety that includes respect for parents and elders, caring for aged parents, family honor, good behavior, and academic success. Empirical findings suggested that parental beliefs in filial piety lowered children’s behavioral problems such as negative emotions, conduct problems, and hyperactivity (Ismail et al., 2009). Studies also suggested that mothers and fathers showed similar parenting styles in Malay families (Salehuddin & Winskel, 2016).

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Others reported that Malay mothers and fathers did not differ in gender socialization practices for children who attained the traditional conception of gender identity and role by age four (Kayati, 2009). This finding signifies mothers and fathers use synchronized messages about gender socialization with their offspring. The Islamic value system underscores the importance of collaborative parental practices that ensure parental harmony and instructs parents to equally invest in both male and female children (Hossain & Juhari, 2015). For Malays, the Islamic value system is a core element of parental belief structure, and parents are heavily engaged as agents of religious socialization for their children. Parental monitoring and involvement in the mosque, school, and youth organizations predicted school-age children’s religious worldview (Krauss et al., 2013). Parents teach children the five pillars of Islam (believe in one God – Allah, pray five times a day, fasting in the month of Ramadan, donate a portion of their savings each year, and pilgrimage at least once in life if you have the means) with the expectation that Islamic principles help children grow with good moral and human values and become righteous citizens. Parents believe it is their religious duty and moral obligation to teach and socialize children with religious values and practices. Parents take pride when children demonstrate positive peer interactions, respect elders and authority figures such as teachers, participate in prayers and fasting (i.e., Ramadan), maintain a healthy diet, do well in school, and assist parents with household chores. It is often the case that Adat plays a momentous role in gender role socialization in Malay families. Boys are socialized to adopt masculine ideologies and behaviors capturing the essence of patriarchal social and family structure. Although there are different interpretations about family structure and typical patriarchy in pre-colonial Malay families (Hirschman, 2016), Malays maintain extended family networks that support the gender hierarchy of patrilocality where the newlywed couple moves into the man’s preferred residential location. The male authority recognizes men’s provisioning role and often emasculates women’s voices in family matters regardless of women’s historic participation in income-generating activities such as agriculture and trade. Girls are socialized to be self-sacrificing and involved in family chores as mothers are expected to do the lion’s share of household work including childcare and preparing meals (Hossain & Madon, 2021). Boys and girls in two-parent families subscribe to more traditional gender roles as they learn gender-linked beliefs and behaviors from their mothers and fathers (Mansor et al., 2014). Mansor et al.’s study also reported that boys from low-income Malay families showed fewer gender-stereotyped behaviors as they needed to help in almost all household work because of economic necessities. These findings urge us to further deliberate how the Adat approach to parenting results in child development outcomes that are different from the Islamic parental pathway.

Parenting and Childrearing Parents’ involvement in childcare typically involves cleaning, feeding, holding, playing, and running errands for the child. Empirical data suggest that as part of their parenting role, Malay mothers ended up doing most of the childcare tasks in the

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family. Unlike mothers’ and fathers’ egalitarian involvement in childcare in Batek indigenous families (Endicott & Endicott, 2008), mothers invested more time in childcare than fathers did in urban and professional Malaysian Chinese and Malay families (Noor, 1999). Another study (Hossain et al., 2005) suggested that compared to fathers, Malay mothers invested far more time per day in basic caregiving tasks such as cleaning, feeding, and playing with their infants. The data indicated that fathers spent more time playing than other basic caring tasks. Specifically, rural mothers and fathers spent 11.91 and 4.16 h in basic childcare activities each day, respectively. Likewise, mothers spent more time (5.41 h) than fathers (2.56 h) each day in urban families. The time investment data suggest that compared to mothers in urban families, rural mothers spent more time in childcare tasks, and rural and urban fathers did not vary in their involvement in childcare (Hossain et al., 2005). These findings suggest that the discrepancy between maternal and paternal involvement in childcare was lower in urban than rural families. The gender and residential differences in parents’ involvement with children may resonate with culturally sponsored gender-linked socialization practices that uphold women’s involvement in traditional family chores. The gender divide in parental involvement in childcare in Malay families is very similar to what has been found in other cultural communities (Lamb, 2010). Malay mothers are the primary care providers of their young children. We argue that the inner struggle in defining parenting roles is very delicate for Malaysian parents as they function as self-sacrificing individuals who need to strongly observe social norms and customs in raising children. Furthermore, the cultural practice of patriarchy keeps the gap between mothers’ and fathers’ time investment in their childcare role in Asian including Malay families (Kling, 1995). Patriarchal authority, the breadwinning role, and the Adat codify social interactions by articulating the importance of mothers’ caregiving role and fathers’ involvement in providing and protecting the family. Culturally speaking, Malay parents appear to conceive that there is no bigger challenge in life than the challenge of being a parent. They approach this challenge with the awareness that there is no greater opportunity in life for personal healing and development than being a parent of a “good moral” child. Parents consider themselves caring and competent as they are bestowed with many types of parenting resources such as religious instructions, extended networks, customs, and selfdedication. These forces work as an embedded system to construct the Malay paradigm that embraces a broad all-encompassing view and a more inclusive context of parenting. The inclusive parenting strategy includes parents’ own awareness and consciousness development as parents as well as the influence of social forces that have implications for parents and children. For example, based on Islamic beliefs, parents know that they have a responsibility to raise children well and are expected to equally invest in male and female children’s education and health. But as part of Adat, parents may show a tendency to observe social customs and norms that allow more freedom for boys than girls to venture into outdoor activities. The Malay pathway of parenting suggests that parenting is a more complex and holistic process that underlines the notion of raising children well is a priority for

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parents. They are blessed to have a child, fully enjoy the advantages of being parents, value the parental stage of their life cycle, grow out of their limitations in life, and construct a mutual context promoting growth for both the parent and the child. It is reasonable to believe that during this time of ever-mounting challenges and evershifting uncertainty, Malay parents rely on their inner beliefs, social customs, and religious convictions that work side by side in constructing parental practices in Malaysia. Embedded in the core of social norms and customs, the value of selfassurance helps Malay parents to perform parental duties and inculcate their expectations and practices in their children who are expected to parent their own children in the future.

Parenting and Household Labor Scholars (e.g., Boo, 2020; Hossain & Madon, 2021) infer that Malay parents’ participation in household labor influences how their children learn and internalize the gender role ideology in the family. Based on cultural and religious beliefs, Malay parents act as a socializing force for their children to learn the styles and values of participating in household labor. Adat also provides a gender-differentiated script of family relations for parents and children to follow in society. Whereas daughters contemplated the mother as a role model for them to get involved in household labor, they viewed their fathers’ involvement as an embodiment of gender egalitarianism in their future adult conjugal lives (Boo, 2020). In fact, teachings from Prophet Mohammed, who took part in household labor and taught his children to do the same, has the potential to encourage Malay Muslim fathers to work as agents to socialize their children to participate in household work (Al-Husaini, 2015). The gender role socialization regarding the distribution of and participation in household labor has implications for empowering children with social and family responsibility and teaching them to be conscientious family members (Gerner, 2008). These findings and assertations highlight the importance of the role of parents and the intersections of religious and social factors in helping children navigate the links between gender roles and the division of household labor in Malay families. Available empirical reports present varied levels and contexts of mothers’ and fathers’ participation in household labor. Several personal and ecological factors such as the gender of parents and residential locations influence how Malay parents negotiate the division of household labor. A recent study (Hossain & Madon, 2021) suggests that rural parents spent about 44 hours in household labor each week, which is about 7% less time compared to their urban counterparts (47 hours/week). Compared to urban families, the difference between mothers and fathers reported time spent in household labor is less in rural Malay families. But the common trend is that mothers in both rural and urban families shoulder the majority of household chores such as preparing meals, cooking, and cleaning including laundry. Likewise, another study on Malaysian families documented that compared to men, women did more domestic work that is less flexible and occurs more frequently such as meal

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preparations and laundry (Khazanah Research Institute - KRI, 2019). The KRI study reported that whereas the difference in time spent in overall household labor between women and mothers is noticeable (137.6 versus 165.8 min per day, respectively), the difference between men in general and fathers was negligible (64.7 versus 68.0 minutes per day, respectively). However, the difference between men and men as parents (fathers) differed depending on the types of tasks. For example, fathers spent 3.9 times more time than non-fathers in meal preparation. The KRI study further reported that mothers spent 1.9 times more time in household labor than non-mothers. These empirical findings suggest that men and women as parents bear more responsibilities and spend more time in household labor than non-parent men and women. Stated differently, the intensity of involvement and gender divide in household labor in Malaysian families becomes more pronounced when parenting roles and responsibilities are factored in. Changes over time and residential patterns also influence how Malay parents negotiate their involvement in household labor. Urban Malaysia takes the lead in offering opportunities for women to pursue modern education, paid employment and participation in the political process. These opportunities have positive implications for redefining the traditional parenting roles because urban ecology stimulates and shapes the debates on changing gender roles. Early descriptive studies chronicled that Malay men took part in household labor when their wives contributed to family economics (Firth, 1966; Reid, 1988). However, the gender divide remains as studies reported that mothers’ employment status does not always correspond with fathers’ increased involvement in household labor (Hossain & Roopnarine, 1993; Kitterød & Pettersen, 2006). It can be argued within the Malaysian context that urban fathers feel the pressure to engage in household labor as extended family members are not readily available to compensate the father’s time in household labor. Future empirical research can be designed to explore the influence of factors such as mothers’ education, employment, and types of occupations on the level of fathers’ involvement in household labor in Malay and other Asian families (Hertog et al., 2021). What is the consideration for parents especially mothers to invest heavily in household chores in Malay families? Adat and the misinterpretations of Islamic religious instructions about gender roles feed patriarchy, highlighting men’s provisioning and protecting roles and delegating household chores to women. This social script creates a cultural ethos of self-sacrificing mothers who ought to cook, prepare meals, clean, and care for children in the family. Mothers are socialized to harbor and demonstrate maternal love by feeding and taking care of children. In line with parenting roles in other Asian societies, children and their wellbeing are at the core of the parenting universe, and therefore, Malay mothers partake in household chores to provide a secure and predictable home environment for their children. Malay mothers are “all-giving” parents who also take joy and self-satisfaction as their investment in household labor fosters the interests and wellbeing of family members. In sum, the gender divide is a salient feature of the parental responsibilities in household labor in Malay families. Although Malay men or fathers participate in household labor, women or mothers continue to perform most household work.

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This scenario is too common across families regardless of their residential or employment status. Scholars point out that employed women and men spent almost a similar amount of time in paid employment but compared to men, employed women ended up spending far more time in unpaid household chores (Khazanah Research Institute, 2019) – a phenomenon called a “second shift” for married women in Western family literature (Hochschild, 2003). Patriarchy, Adat, and Islamic values have a concerted influence to sustain the gender divide with a tone of complementary gender role dynamics in household labor.

Contemporary Malays and Parenting Contemporary Malays, in both urban and rural settings, are at a crossroads as they try to preserve the values of Adat, observe Islamic religious pronouncements, and navigate the influence of Western family ideologies, modern education, and rapid economic and technological development in parenting roles and practices. Whereas the strengths and the authenticity of the indigenous Malay psychology about parenting remain strong, the touch of modernization presses Malay parents to reconfigure both spousal and parent-child relations in the family. Empirical research is needed to examine how and the degree to which modernization affects parents and their roles in the family as contemporary Malay parents envision the emerging identity of Melayu Baru (the New Malay) in a rapidly changing Malaysian society (Baharudin et al., 2011, Martin, 2019, Musa, 2002). Given the current context of socioeconomic changes, we speculate that contemporary Malays ought to consider several family and parenting matters as described below. The sex of the child has been a central parenting theme in many Asian societies as it involves family lineage, heritage, and inheritance. Unlike parental preference for a male child in Indian and Chinese societies (Hirschman, 2016), Malay parents have been adapting a neutral child-sex attitude in their involvement with children (Hossain, 2013; Hossain & Madon, 2021). We maintain that increasing urbanization, democratic governance structure, and educational opportunities encourage parents to invest in both male and female children’s care, education, and health equally. This perspective is in line with the Islamic teachings of providing for and treating all children similarly. Arguably, instead of emphasizing Adat that patronizes sex-hierarchy, contemporary Malay parents have been showing an increasing tendency to follow the Islamic teachings that instruct parents to accept, interact, and treat both male and female children alike (Hossain & Juhari, 2015). Education and employment are important aspects that are highly linked to parenting roles and expectations in contemporary Malay families. According to the Department of Statistics Malaysia (2020), about 56% of women participated in the paid labor force in 2020. Although mothers’ participation in the labor force is not a new phenomenon in Malay families, a growing number of mothers are getting involved in the cash economy especially in the paid sectors in urban areas (Kalthom et al., 2008). Such a changing employment structure has implications for the shared

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parenting model in Malay families. Parental education is positively linked to children’s school performance and social skills (Keshavarz & Baharudin, 2009) indicating educated and employed Malay parents become a social force to engineer developmental pathways for productive future generations. Notably, men’s egalitarian belief structures regarding sex roles are believed to encourage urban fathers to participate more in childcare when compared to their rural counterparts (Hossain, 2014). Single parenting is a new demographic shift contemporary Malaysia has been experiencing as a result of recent socioeconomic and technological changes in the country. Single-parent households are mainly headed by single mothers and there were about a quarter of a million single mothers in Malaysia in 2015 (Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development, 2015). The number of single mothers has been consistently increasing in recent years (Aw & Sabri, 2021). This trend has become a growing pain among contemporary Malays because about 75% of single mothers live in poverty (Aw & Sabri, 2021; Faizah & Azian, 2013) and single motherhood causes maladaptive behaviors among adolescents (Baharudin et al., 2011). Although single parenting marshals mothers’ personal choices for an independent lifestyle as a socially acceptable family form, it also demands contemporary Malays to face challenging psychological and economic consequences of this new family paradigm. Contemporary Malay parenting takes place within the contexts of declining fertility and smaller family size. The fertility rate of 6.00 births per woman in 1950 has declined to 1.99 births per woman in 2019 (United Nations, 2019). Consequently, contemporary Malays witness a small family and a dwindled extended support network. The declining fertility rate and increasing population mobility due to employment and economic opportunities support the growing trend in smaller family composition and/or the nuclear family system. Today, Malays are in the midst of reevaluating the traditional importance and the use of extended support networks in their parenting roles. Furthermore, urbanization, the capitalistic yet welfare economy, and the democratic political systems prompt them to learn and employ institutional resources to buttress family relations that support parenting tasks vis-à-vis child development. Although Malays consider Adat and Islamic religious beliefs are the foundations of successful and moral parenting, changing times are asking them to reassess the traditional gender role ideology that delineates parenting roles in the family. The hegemonic belief structure allows the father to function as the family patriarch, requires the mother to be submissive and perform domestic chores including childcare, and tolerates the practice of polygyny (Hossain & Juhari, 2015; Khazanah Research Institute, 2019; Noor, 2006). These practices are changing because of opportunities for women to get an education, join the paid labor force, and access healthcare including birth control. Malays are in a transition to deconstruct the traditional sex roles and gender hierarchy in the family as they move through contemporary socioeconomic changes and family processes. The Islamic ideologies support the new conceptualization of gender relations that foster complementarity and egalitarianism between mothers and fathers in their parenting roles (Karim, 1992).

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The devastating impact of the COVID-19 pandemic has added new stress and uncertainty to once fluid family dynamics and interactions among Malays. The Movement Control Order (MCO) in Malaysia has restricted families to be in the home. As a result, families have been experiencing confinement-related stress, fear, panic, and media hype on COVID-related high risk of illness and death occurrences (Shanmugam et al., 2020). Parents and children have been showing high anxiety and depressive symptoms due to rapid infection rates and loss of life since the start of the COVID-19 in 2020. According to a recent study on Malaysian parents and children, about 38% of respondents reported a high level of psychological stress and about 46% of respondents displayed a high level of negative behavioral conduct due to the COVID-19 pandemic, respectively (Zainudeen et al., 2021). The same study highlighted that the negative psychological impact was significantly higher in families with irregular employment compared to families with regular employment. Another study revealed family relationships and social support positively contributed to protecting family wellbeing during COVID-19 (Ismail et al., 2021). Exploring the extent of changes in the lives of women amid COVID-19, Hasbullah and his associates (2021) reported that women were worried about future security in life, the standard of living, achievement in life, and the state of community connectedness. In addition to illness and loss of work and life, the COVID-19 pandemic challenges the norms of embedded family dynamics and flexible family boundaries as it restricts relatives visiting one another. COVID-19 is testing the Malay tenets of healthy and interconnected family relationships, extended network and support, and psychological wellbeing.

Conclusions: Future Research and Policy Implications Although Malaysia has undergone remarkable modernization with education and technology as well as achieved low unemployment and a high rate of economic growth since the 1980s (Stivens, 2006), parenting roles and behaviors are still largely constructed within the traditional family values of Adat, filial piety, and Islamic teachings. The dichotomous expectations of men’s authority in the family and women’s education and employment in the paid sectors fashion a divided platform for parenting roles. Based on the prosperous economic realities and emerging expectations of egalitarianism, contemporary Malays are in the process of initiating a narrative for a balanced parenting model that recognizes both mothers’ and fathers’ complementary roles. We believe whereas Adat can continue to shape the basic family structures and behavioral etiquettes, Islamic teachings of equality have the potential to inspire the balanced parenting model. These two unique yet co-existing value systems are at the core of the Malay parenting world that can be called what sociologist Emile Durkheim coined as the “collective consciousness” in his 1893 landmark book titled The Division of Labor in Society. Malays are largely a homogenous group and their collective consciousness based on Adat and Islamic ideals inspire them to construct a shared value system of family and social norms that foster responsible parenting roles and practices and children’s wellbeing.

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Couched within Adat and Islamic belief systems, Malays negotiate and practice their parenting roles in the family. One major aspect of the parenting role is how parents treat sons and daughters. Although Malays tend to treat their male and female children equally, some parents may show differential interactions with their male and female children as they fall in the Adat side of the Adat-Islamic teachings continuum. Future empirical research can be designed to explore how the sex of the child influences parents’ involvement with children. Scholars indicate modern education and economic transformations and opportunities encourage women to enter the job market but pregnancy, responsibilities for family chores, sexual harassment, and lower wages make the work and workplace unattractive for women (Yoong, 2020). Recent reports suggest that 75% of mothers are reported to be exiting the labor force to care for children and perform parenting roles (Lim & Rasdi, 2019; Yoong, 2020). Given encouraging trends in education and especially service sector employment for women, future research can focus on aspects of gender equality in parents’ engagement in childcare and household labor in Malay families. Also, future studies can be designed to examine and promote work-family balance for contemporary Malays. Because of traditional social hierarchies that still exist, the globalized context of life, and the increasingly high standard of living and urbanization, Malays must deal with parenting in diverse ways. For example, the availability of cheap labor and domestic maids have added complex dynamics to the distribution of childcare and household labor vis-à-vis parenting boundaries and roles in the family. Urbanization encourages parents to explore an alternative for extended support networks and educated and employed mothers are demanding their husbands contribute more to unpaid family labor (Hossain et al., 2005). To counter the perception that current social changes including rapid urbanization have the potential to erode traditional family values and escalate social ills (e.g., premarital sexual relations, less commitment to family wellbeing, divorce), the LPPKN (Lembaga Penduduk dan Pembangunan Keluarga Negara or Ministry of Women, Family, and Community Development) started a campaign known as the “Malaysia Nation of Character” (MNOC) to strengthen families. Recognizing that the family is the primary determinant of a healthy, dynamic, productive, and competitive nation, the government through the Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development (MWFCD) took the initiative to formulate a National Family Policy (NFP) in 2010 to support parents and families. This government-level movement provides resources to parents and encourages them to raise their children with culturally sanctioned positive and ethical values. This is a planned effort to continue to recognize and support families as valuable social institutions and equip parents with appropriate family services (e.g., counseling, reproductive health, parenting workshops), knowledge, and skills that empower parents and usher in the quality of parenting life (Stivens, 2006). Future research can focus on the development as well as assessment of family services and policies that foster child development and parenting in Malaysia. The findings can inform policymakers and family and child scholars about unique aspects of parenting in Malay families and strengthen the non-Western parenting literature in the field of social and behavioral sciences.

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Selin, H. (2014). Parenting across cultures: Childrearing, motherhood and fatherhood in non-Western cultures. Springer. Shanmugam, H., Juhari, J. A., Nair, P., Ken, C. S., & Guan, N. C. (2020). Impacts of COVID-19 pandemic on mental health in Malaysia: A single thread of hope. Malaysian Journal of Psychiatry, 29(1), 78–84. Shwalb, D. W., & Shwalb, B. J. (Eds.). (1996). Japanese childrearing: Two generations of scholarship. Guilford Press. Stivens, M. (2006). ‘Family values’ and Islamic revival: Gender, rights, and state moral projects in Malaysia. Women’s Studies International Forum, 29, 354–367. United Nations. (2019). World population prospects 2019. Department of Economic and Social Affairs. https://population.un.org/wpp/ Wille, D. E. (1995). The 1990s: Gender differences in parenting roles. Sex Roles, 33(11–12), 803–817. Yoong M. (2020). Professional discourses, gender and identity in women’s media. Palgrave Pivot, Cham. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-55544-3_1. Zainudeen, Z. T., Hamid, I. J. A., Azizuddin, M. N. A., Abu Bakar, F. F., Sany, S., Zolkepli, I. A., & Mangantig, E. (2021). Psychosocial impact COVID-19 pandemic on Malaysian families: A cross-sectional study. BMJ Open, 11, e050523.

Ziarat Hossain (PhD in Child and Family Studies, Syracuse University) is a professor of Family and Child Studies and Regents’ Lecturer at the University of New Mexico. His research focuses on parenting and fathers’ role in child development across ethnic minority families in the United States and international families. He is a former Society for Cross-Cultural Research (SCCR) president and Fulbright Scholar in Malaysia. Currently, he is Chair of the Department of Individual, Family and Community Education in the College of Education and Human Sciences at UNM. Zainal Madon is a registered counselor with the Malaysian Board of Counselors and has served as a counselor, educator, and researcher for the last 20 years. He is currently an Associate Professor in the Department of Human Development and Family Studies, Faculty of Human Ecology, Universiti Putra Malaysia. He led 25 research projects concentrating on various themes which include child and adolescent development, parenting, at-risk children, impact studies on intervention/training, family dynamic, and at-risk family. Zainal was also involved in several policy studies under the Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development focusing on issues related to homeless people and deinsitituional among children, the Ministry of Education on developing curriculum and training module for the Early Childhood Program, and the Ministry of Rural Development for reviewing and developing a strategic plan for preschool among rural and poor children. Now, he is a lead consultant for training child care teachers under the PERMATA program, a national program for childcare and early childhood education in Malaysia.

Family Socialization in Brazil Isabel Martínez, Pablo Queiroz, Leoncio Camino, Cleonice Camino, and Edie Cruise

Family Socialization in Brazil The Socialization Process Classically, socialization has been defined as a learning and internalization process whereby the culture of one generation is transmitted to the next (Whiting, 1970). Through this process, individuals acquire the cultural values, habits and norms necessary for adaptation to a determined society (Baumrind, 1996). Therefore, the objective of the study of the socialization process has been to understand the way in which individuals acquire and internalize the social habits, beliefs, values and norms that define a culture (Maccoby, 1994; Zigler & Child, 1969). From this stance, adaptation to a society or social group constitutes the main objective of socialization processes. Researchers such as Piaget (1975) emphasized the dynamic aspects involved in child development. In analyzing the moral development of the child, Piaget (1932) emphasizes the importance of peers in the socialization process. According to Piaget, only through cooperation with peers can the child develop an autonomous morality. Going deeper into this idea, some theoretical perspectives of the 1980s, such as the study of intergroup relations (Tajfel, 1981), demonstrate the role of the group itself as a socializing agent. In this sense, it is necessary to bear in mind that the interaction between the psychological level and the sociological level is a bidirectional process

I. Martínez (*) · E. Cruise Universidad de Castilla-La Mancha, Cuenca, Spain e-mail: [email protected] P. Queiroz Universidade Federal do Rio Grande do Norte, Natal, Brazil L. Camino · C. Camino Universidade Federal da Paraiba, Joao Pessoa, Brazil © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_13

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of influence. On the one hand, subjective processes are influenced by the specific characteristics adopted by a social group. And on the other, an influence in the opposite direction is also possible, since social formations are dynamically constructed by the set of actions and representations of their individual members. In this way, through the socialization process, children and adolescents begin to recognize their interests through their active insertion in diverse groups in society. This aspect of socialization is founded on the process of social identity construction: groups construct their identities through intergroup relations and individuals are socialized in this process (Camino, 1996). By interacting with other groups, individuals construct values, norms and representations of themselves and of the groups they make up, defining their social identity. Young people will not adapt in an individual way to existing groups, but rather will participate in the construction of the norms and social identity of the groups to which they belong (Camino, 1996). Finally, groups do not develop in a social vacuum, but inside social, economic and political formations with specific ideologies. The characteristics of these social formations will also influence the intergroup relations that are established within them.

Some Characteristics of Brazilian Society Given that characteristics of a particular context and social formations influence socialization processes, it is important to consider some of the social, economic and political characteristics of Brazil. The Federative Republic of Brazil is the largest country in South America. It is the world’s fifth largest country, both by geographical area and by population, with over 192 million people. Brazil is a federation composed of 26 States but it is organized into five regions: South and Southeast, which are the most industrialized; Central West that is composed of large land plots with cattle, soybean plantations, or precious stone extraction; Northeast, which is predominantly rural, and North, whose economy is based on plant and mineral extraction. An important factor in the socialization processes of a nation is its history. The period of Portuguese colonization of Brazil between the beginning of the sixteenth century and 1808, when the Portuguese court moved to Rio de Janeiro, was characterized by an extractive and mercantilist policy, and the cities were formed as factories—mercantile, administrative and bureaucratic centers. Land acquisition was carried out by sesmarias conceded by the central government, which granted land to those who wanted to produce. The settlers came mainly to make a fortune and not to start a new life, as was the case with most of the English families that colonized the United States. In the absence of a functioning central administration, and because Brazil is a country of enormous expanse, local powers eventually became independent of the central government, thus strongly fragmenting power and strengthening local leaders (Viana, 1932). This factor would later influence the development of a certain submissiveness of the population in accepting the

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leadership of local authorities. In the interior of the country there were large landowners (coronéis) who, in addition to the land, received almost absolute power over the people who worked and inhabited these domains. This political situation defines authoritarianism as a system of government and submission as the correct attitude. Authoritarianism also strongly marks family discipline, especially in rural areas, and, since families were constituted not only by wives and children, but also by slaves and dominion officials, the concept of patriarchy in Brazil acquired a broader character. This power of the Lord that comes from the property characterizes what is called patrimonialism: the power and importance given by the lord and his family to the possession of the land. Despite this very painful process of urbanization of the country, in the 1960s and 1970s, the possession of land acquired more economic and less symbolic power. The existence of expressions such as, “Do you know who you are talking to?” and the fact that families perpetuate themselves in local power, even with elections, show the aftermath of patrimonialism in Brazilian society. Another important effect of colonization has been highlighted by the culturalist approach when it states that political corruption and current political problems are forged in the Portuguese patrimonialism of the colonial period. The Brazilian national identity, characterized by the “cordial man” (Holanda, 1995) and the “Brazilian jeitinho” (Da Matta, 1984) would have developed in the colonial period and continue to manifest itself today mainly in the corrupt state. Regarding the economy, Brazil, like many Latin American countries, has experienced strong economic growth in recent years. In fact, today the Brazilian economy is the world’s sixth largest and is one of the world’s fastest growing major economies. However, despite this growth, Brazilians are witnessing a moral crisis in public institutions, reflected in the numerous impeachment processes, which demonstrates the corruption present even at the highest levels of government. Similarly, a moral decline can be seen in the private production sector reflected in rising prices throughout different sectors, indicating a desire for profits. In the general population, a crisis in moral values can also be observed, contaminated in some ways by the institutional crisis. This moral crisis is clearly expressed through mass media, mainly television. For example, in a study on values transmitted by television, Camino & Cavalcanti (1998), following the typology of Kohlberg (1976, 1984), analyzed several soap operas of the Rede Globo channel (the broadcaster with the greatest audience in Brazil). It was observed that the most frequently transmitted values were related to heteronomous morals or values that reinforced these types of morals. Among these values were: opportunism (using others for personal benefit), dishonesty, and lack of obligation to consequences of one’s own acts. Camino et al. (1992), demonstrate the influence that exposure to this type of values can have on television viewers. In their study, they observed that the higher the viewers’ empathy for characters considered “triumphant bad-guys”, the greater their adhesion to the heteronomous values transmitted by these characters. This study shows that empathy with these characters is related to a more utilitarian and less moral attitude.

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Another factor that also affects the processes of socialization is the set of miscegenation that Brazil has undergone. Since the arrival of the Portuguese in Brazil (1500), a process of miscegenation began between the indigenous populations and the Portuguese settlers. Later, with the establishment of the African slave trade (1570), aimed at providing labor for the immense sugar cane plantations, a strong process of miscegenation took place between the black population and the Portuguese settlers. At the end of the nineteenth century and the beginning of the twentieth century, at the height of pseudo-scientific ideas about racial differences (Schwartz, 1992), people in Brazil began to believe that miscegenation was a factor in the degradation of the purity of the white race (Vianna, 1932). In opposition to this prejudiced attitude, Freyre’s book Casa Grande e Senzala (Freyre, 2001) attempts to highlight the positive values that miscegenation had left in Brazilian culture. Even so, he has been widely criticized since the 1960s for attenuating the cruelty and violence involved in the process of miscegenation (Fernandes, 1965). It can be said without a doubt that the period of slavery and the racist ideas of the nineteenth century have contributed to the formation of institutional racism that, even with the current prohibitions of racist acts, remains masked (Camino et al., 2001). As observed by França (2013), parents generally do not talk to their children about racism, giving the feeling that they live in a racial democracy, when in fact racial discrimination continues to grow, affecting the income, education and health of the black population. Another problem is poverty, which affects a large part of the population. Data from the IBGE’s 2017–2018 Family Budget Survey (POF) show that 36.7% of Brazilian households, totaling 84.9 million people, suffered some difficulty in acquiring food. According to the study, at least 10.3 million people faced hunger regularly at the time with a constant and daily lack of food. Poverty also affects children’s schooling, as they are forced to work from an early age to help with the family income (Maciel et al., 1997). On the other hand, public schools, the only ones accessible to a large part of the population, have a lower quality compared to private schools attended by middleand upper-class children, thus creating a discrepancy in the possibilities of social mobility, causing the income gap to increase between rich and poor. The fact is that Brazil’s Gini index is 0.539, which places it as the ninth most socially unequal country in the world. This index indicates that in Brazil the top 1% of the population earns 35 times more than the poorest 35%. It is important that studies on socialization take into account all these sociodemographic characteristics.

The Socialization Process in the Family As mentioned at the beginning of this chapter, the ways in which the socialization process develops are multiple and complex, which makes the study of the family a fundamental socializing agent. Norms and socialization processes vary according to

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different social, economic and political contexts, but in any context, the role of parents is always to evaluate whether or not the child’s behavior is in accordance with the norms. This is due to the attribution of societal responsibility to parents as socializing agents, which is constant and transcends the diversity of cultural norms (Darling & Steinberg, 1993). It can be said that research on family socialization strives to respond to two fundamental questions: (1) how parents socialize their children, i.e., what practices, systems or strategies parents use to get their children to internalize certain social norms and behave in order to adapt healthily to society, and (2) what impact the different forms of parental socialization have on their children, or how parental behavior is related to the personal and social adjustment of their children. On the second question, it should be said that, when studying the role of parents in the socialization process, the influence that the cultural context, as well as the child’s own behavior, may have on parental behavior should be considered (Chapman, 1979; Schaffer, 1984).

How Parents Socialize Their Children: Socialization Styles In order to define or classify the relationship between parents and children in a determined context, a certain consistency is necessary in parental actions regarding the child’s behavior. According to Musitu & García (2001), this consistency in parental conduct is what defines a socialization style. Socialization styles are patterns of persistent behavior that parents adopt in response to different behaviors on the part of their children in everyday life. However, what constitutes a socialization style is not just the consistent use of a set of techniques, or socialization practices, defined as a response to a specific act of the child, but rather the fact that parents use these practices by combining them and guiding them toward a goal. Socialization styles allow the classification of a large part of the relationship established between parents and children. Initially, Baumrind (1967, 1971), one of the authors who has contributed most to the study of parenting styles, distinguished between three styles of parental socialization: authoritative, authoritarian and permissive, based on the type of authority and control exercised by parents. Authoritarian parents are those who tend to direct their children’s activities in a rational and oriented manner; they give incentives to dialogue and reason and exercise firm control over their children. Authoritarian parents are those who control the child’s behavior through punitive behavior and especially value compliance with established family rules of conduct. Finally, permissive parents do use punishment and are responsive to the child’s wishes. These parents are more of a resource for the fulfillment of the child’s wishes than a socializing agent or model that directs the child’s behavior (Baumrind, 1996). Later, Maccoby and Martin (1983) proposed measuring socialization styles with a quadripartite typology model via two dimensions of parental conduct that are theoretically independent: demandingness and responsiveness (Darling & Steinberg,

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1993; Smetana, 1995). Parental demandingness refers to parental attitudes and behaviors that try to control the behavior of the child in some way, imposing limits and establishing rules. Responsiveness, on the other hand, refers to attitudes which favor autonomy development and self-affirmation of the child through communication and emotional support. From these dimensions four socialization styles can be derived: authoritative—characterized by the use of high demandingness and high responsiveness; neglectful—characterized by low demandingness and low responsiveness; indulgent—characterized by low demandingness and high responsiveness; and authoritarian—characterized by the employment of high demandingness and low responsiveness. Costa, Teixeira and Gomes (2000) found that the dimensions of demandingness and responsiveness were appropriate for measuring socialization in Brazil, translating the scale used by Lamborn, Mounts, Steinberg & Dornbusch (1991) into Portuguese. In this self-report instrument, adolescents evaluate attitudes and practices related to demandingness and responsiveness of their parents separately. Using the exploratory factor analysis technique, the two dimensions were replicated in the Brazilian population, specifically in a sample from Porto Alegre, in the state of Rio Grande del Sur. The distribution of the styles that the authors observed (Costa et al., 2000) does not present significant differences with the distribution found in the United States, using the same scoring system based on the parents’ scores (low or high) in the demandingness and responsiveness dimensions (Lamborn et al. 1991). The authoritative and neglectful styles are the most frequent (36.7% and 35%, respectively), while the styles least used by Brazilian parents are the indulgent and authoritarian (14.5% and 13.3%, respectively). This distribution is similar to that observed by Weber, Prado, Viezzer & Brandenburg (2004), using the same scales, with a sample of children from the Curitiba region, in the south of Brazil (neglectful, 45.4%; authoritative, 32.8%; indulgent, 11.8%; and authoritarian, 10.1%), though here the authors highlighted the high number of neglectful families observed. Martínez et al. (2011), Martínez et al. (2012) and Martínez et al. (2019) also confirmed the existence of two dimensions equivalent to demandingness and responsiveness upon validating the ESPA29 family socialization scale, originally developed in Spain, with a sample of over 2.000 adolescents in the Northeast of Brazil. This scale measures parental socialization styles (authoritative, indulgent, authoritarian and neglectful) using a contextual (Darling & Steinberg, 1993) and situational perspective (Oliveira et al., 2002; Smetana, 1995). The two independent dimensions, called acceptance/involvement and strictness/imposition in the scale, are configured by considering the level of employment that parents make of various concrete practices of socialization. The socialization practices considered are affection, indifference, dialogue, detachment, scolding, physical punishment and revoking privileges. The practices of scolding, physical punishment and revoking privileges define the strictness/imposition dimension. These practices are employed in situations in which the conduct of the child is inappropriate and discrepant with the norms of family conduct. Their objective is to modify the child’s conduct, imposing restrictions and limits on behavior so that the child can develop the ability to suppress attractive, but prohibited, behaviors and adopt more socially desirable ones (Mischel

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& Mischel, 1976; Parke, 1974). The acceptance/involvement dimension is made up of the practices of dialogue and affection in the positive extreme, and indifference and detachment in the negative extreme. These practices can be employed in situations where the child’s behavior is contrary to that of the familial norms (dialogue) as well as in situations in which the child behaves in accordance with these norms in order to reward the behavior (affection). The practices of affection and dialogue are employed to a similar degree by both parents (Martínez, 2005). However, there are differences in the use of the strictness/ imposition practices on the part of both mothers and fathers. Both use scolding to a higher degree, followed by revoking privileges, while physical punishment is the technique least employed (Martínez & Madrid, 2008). Beyond proving the suitability of the demandingness and responsiveness dimensions in order to measure parental socialization style in Brazil, other authors have explored the use of a number of concrete parental control techniques characteristic of Brazilian culture, especially in the rural environment of the Northeast. These techniques include threats of punishment from mythical or supernatural beings (e.g., if you don’t go to sleep, the devil will hit you) and positive reinforcement techniques (e.g., if you behave nicely, I’ll give you some chocolate) (Camino et al., 1996). Later, Camino et al. (2003) analyzed these control techniques, as well as the three control techniques outlined by Hoffman (1983, 1994): threat of a real punishment, threat of withdrawal of affection and explanation of the consequences of a prohibited act. The analysis centered on the mother’s use of these practices in a low socioeconomic setting in the same region of Brazil in diverse situations such as eating, sleeping, dressing and studying. Using factor analysis, the authors found that all five control techniques grouped into two factors. These factors differentiated between external control techniques and the internal control techniques that mothers used in Brazil. It was found that the use of the techniques of a promise of reward, threats of real or supernatural punishment and the threat of affection withdrawal grouped into the same factor: external control. External control techniques try to control behavior through positive or negative consequences that are not directly related to the act of the child, which is the target of control. However, explanation of the consequences of the child’s conduct loaded onto the other factor, constituting an internal control technique that, contrary to the others, reflects an attitude of control that emphasizes the intrinsic consequences that the child’s behavior would have. Gomide developed a theoretical model consisting of seven types of parental educational practices in Brazil (Sampaio & Gomide, 2007). Five of these practices would be the most related to children’s antisocial behavior (physical abuse, inconsistent punishment, relaxed discipline, negative monitoring and neglect), and the other two would be promoters of prosocial behavior (positive monitoring and moral behavior). The instrument developed for the evaluation of these practices, the Parenting Styles Inventory, has 42 items organized in two dimensions: positive parenting, whose items are related to prosocial behaviors, and negative parenting, whose items are more related to antisocial behaviors. The author considers that the higher the score obtained on the scale, the higher the negative parenting index.

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Parents’ and Children’s Perception of the Socialization Process Weber et al. (2004) analyzed the differences in Brazil between the perceptions of parents and children in identifying the socialization styles that parents use. In their study, they compared the perception of parental conduct that parents and children have, which resulted in both mothers and fathers considering themselves to be more demanding and responsive than what children consider their parents to be. The tendency for parents to see themselves as extremely demanding and responsive does not coincide with the vision that their children have of them, which is more moderate. The authors argue that these differences could be due to parents feeling tempted to respond in a socially desirable way, considering the ideal parent to demonstrate demanding or responsive behaviors whenever the situation calls for them. However, it is also possible that the parent’s and child’s perceptions differ due to parental behavior being interpreted in a distinct way on the part of the child. These authors pointed out how it is possible for parents not to have full knowledge about the behaviors and activities of their children, which would imply that their real behavior was actually less demanding than what parents believed it was (Weber et al., 2004).

Differences in the use of socialization practices between mothers and fathers in Brazil The different role that mothers and fathers have in the raising of children in Brazil is reflected in the differences in the degree to which each parent employs the different socialization practices. Authors such as Costa et al. (2000), as well as Martínez et al. (2003) found that Brazilian adolescents scored their mothers higher than their fathers in behaviors that define the responsiveness dimension as well as behaviors that define the demandingness dimension. This reflects a more marked presence of mothers in the employment of child-rearing practices in the family environment. This result was confirmed by Weber et al. (2004) who found that mothers assigned themselves higher scores than did fathers in both dimensions—demandingness and responsiveness—when the parents themselves evaluated their parenting behavior. Similar results have been found in studies carried out in other countries and not just Brazil. As affirmed by Costa et al. (2000), in general the mother is identified as the parent closer to the adolescent and with greater contact (Claes, 1998; Hennigen, 1994; Paulson & Sputa, 1996). However, it must be pointed out that the presence of mothers in child-rearing is greater than that of fathers in Brazil when compared with other countries, such as Spain, where the presence of both parents seems to be more equal (Martínez et al., 2003).

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Employment of Socialization Practices in Boys and Girls in Brazil Another aspect of the socialization process that has been shown to influence the socialization practices that parents choose to employ is the gender of the child (Martínez, 2005). This has been highlighted as well in Brazil in some studies which have analyzed the employment of different socialization strategies in boys and girls. These studies have shown that Brazilian mothers as well as fathers tend to employ more demanding practices with girls than with boys (Costa et al., 2000; Weber et al., 2004). In terms of the employment of responsive practices, Costa et al. (2000) showed that, in spite of a lack of differences in fathers’ employment with boys and girls, Brazilian mothers also tended to use more practices of responsiveness with girls than with boys. Hence, Brazilian girls experience more intense childrearing practices. Weber et al. (2004) give a cultural explanation for these differences based on the belief that girls are more fragile and with more care needs than boys, who are considered to be stronger and more autonomous. This, in turn, leads to parents tending to display more neglectful behavior toward boys, which would also confirm the influence of a macho culture, which gives men greater freedom.

Repercussions of Different Forms of Socialization The way in which the socialization style the parent employs relates to the behavior of children and their social and psychological adjustment could be the most widely studied phenomenon in family socialization literature. Baumrind (1996) proposed that authoritative parental control was the most effective to socialize and raise children over the authoritarian and neglectful types of control in her pioneering work (Baumrind, 1967, 1971). In these studies, she argued that an authoritative parenting style, which combines firm control with dialogue, would better transmit social norms and values and would result in more mature, autonomous and responsible children (Baumrind, 1967, 1971; Maccoby & Martin, 1983). Considering the quadripartite model, originating from the demandingness and responsiveness dimensions (Maccoby & Martin, 1983), research carried out in an Anglo-Saxon context, with samples of middle-class European-American adolescents, has supported the idea that the use of the authoritative style achieves more optimum results in child and adolescent development (Baumrind, 1967, 1971; Lamborn et al., 1991; Steinberg et al., 1992, 1994). In general, in this context, children from authoritarian and indulgent families displayed intermediate profiles of social and psychological adjustment, while children from neglectful families tended to present the lowest levels of adjustment. However, studies recently carried out in other cultural contexts have found that it is not always the authoritative style that is related to the best outcomes in child adjustment. For example, a number of studies carried out in the United States with Asian minorities show that the use of an authoritarian style by parents is associated

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with positive adjustment in children, especially in academic results (Chao, 1994, 1996, 2001; Reglin & Adams, 1990). In this same way, the authoritarian style was not found to be damaging to adolescent mental health in Arabic societies (Dwairy et al., 2006). Finally, in other cultural contexts, it seems that the indulgent style is associated with the best outcomes of adolescent adjustment or as equally as good as the results associated with the authoritative style. Among the studies that show positive outcomes in adolescents raised under the indulgent style are those carried out in the Philippines by Hindin (2005), as well as in countries in southern Europe such as Turkey (Türkel & Tezer, 2008), Spain (Musitu & García, 2001, 2004) and Italy (Marchetti, 1997). This has also been found in Latin American countries, such as Mexico (Villalobos et al., 2004) and Brazil (García et al., 2019; Martínez & García, 2008; Martínez et al., 2007, 2020).

Impacts on Children of Different Forms of Parental Socialization in Brazil Parenting and Internalization of Values Regarding studies on the effects of parental socialization on the psychosocial adjustment of children and adolescents in Brazil, Moraes et al. (2007) analyzed the relationship between the employment of the practices of acceptance, coercion and detachment on the part of the parents with the values displayed by their adolescent children. Through the practices of acceptance, parents reason with and show affection to their children, while the practices of coercion are based on the use of punitive strategies, and the practices of detachment on indifference in response to the child’s behavior. The results of this study show that the employment of the practices of reasoning and affection are positively related to the internalization of values, including materialist, post-materialist and religious values. However, the practices of punishment and indifference overall were related negatively to the internalization of these values, with the exception of materialist values, which are related to the use of detachment practices by parents.

Parenting and Moral Development Another example of the positive outcomes that can be rendered by the use of the reasoning practice on children in Brazil is outlined in the study carried out by Camino et al. (2003) in the Northeast of the country with families from low socioeconomic levels. The authors found that reasoning was the parental control technique associated with the highest moral development as it promotes internal behavioral control compared to external control techniques, such as promise of reward, threat of real or supernatural punishment and threat of affection withdrawal.

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Parenting and Self-Esteem The importance of reasoning in family socialization has been highlighted in two studies with a sample of Brazilian adolescents by Martínez et al. (2007) and Martínez & García (2008), and later by García et al., (2020), Martínez et al., (2019) and Martínez et al. (2020) in cross-cultural studies with samples of different countries, including Brazil. In those studies the relationship between the four parental socialization styles (authoritative, authoritarian, neglectful and indulgent) and adolescent adjustment was analyzed. The results of these studies show that children raised by indulgent parents (high use of the practices of affection and reasoning) have equal or higher adjustment as compared to children reared by authoritative parents (high use of affection and reasoning, but also high use of coercive practices). Specifically, these studies found that Brazilian adolescents raised primarily under the practices of affection and reasoning have equal self-esteem, or even higher in the case of family self-esteem, than youth reared under the authoritative style (Martínez et al., 2007, 2020). Additionally, regarding value internalization, which has been pointed out as the key of well-developed children (Baumrind, 1996), no differences were found in the adhesion to the values of self-transcendence and conservation between authoritatively and indulgently raised adolescents (Martínez & García, 2008; Martínez et al., 2020). Internalization of these values is important because they reflect consideration for others and acceptance of social norms (conservation values) and concern for the welfare and interests of others (self-transcendence values) (Schwartz, 1992; Schwartz & Bilsky, 1987, 1990). Children raised by authoritarian and neglectful parents would be the ones who least internalize these values.

Parenting and Human Rights Regarding studies conducted since 2014 on the effect of socialization on children’s psychosocial adjustment, Queiroz (2015) sought to verify the effect of maternal inductive technique, based on dialogue and affection, on the development of commitment to respect for human rights in adolescents in northeastern Brazil. Based on a study with a mother-child dyad, using structural equation modeling, the author demonstrated a positive effect of maternal explanations on the commitment to rights related to individual freedoms, social rights and the rights of minority and environmental groups.

Parenting and Academic and Professional Life Regarding the effect of parental practices on children’s formal education, Martinelli and Matsuoka (2018) conducted a study with elementary school students, who averaged 9 years of age, seeking to verify the relationship of parental involvement

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(with communication practices and parental participation in their children’s activities) and parents’ positive beliefs with their children’s performance in writing. The authors verified a significant effect of parents’ positive beliefs on children’s writing performance; however, there was no significant effect of parental involvement in writing. They also observed positive correlations between maternal demand and the pursuit of occupational social prestige and financial profitability. As for parental socialization styles, both the demand dimension and the responsiveness dimension correlated positively with the search for the social prestige of professions and financial profitability. In order to verify the effect of socialization styles on indecisiveness and career interests in adolescents, Murgos et al. (2018) conducted a survey of 472 high school students from public schools in a small city in southeastern Brazil. The authors observed negative correlations between maternal responsiveness and insecurity and lack of information for decision making, immaturity to choose and conflicts with significant others.

Parenting and Behavioral Adjustment Benetti, Schwartz, Soares, Macarena and Pattussi (2014), comparing two groups of adolescents (diagnosed with internal behavioral problems—anxiety, depression— and external—aggressiveness, violence), also in southern Brazil, observed that adolescents who did not present behavioral problems perceived their parents’ socialization as positive. On the other hand, adolescents identified as presenting internal and external behavioral problems perceived their parents’ socialization as negative. When comparing parenting styles with the style considered optimal, adolescents who presented internal and external behavioral problems were the ones who most perceived their parents’ socialization as negative. Bolsoni-Silva and Loureiro (2020), in a study conducted with mothers with depression and mothers without this condition, observed that the positive parenting practices used by mothers with depression were positively related to the expression of their children’s social skills. They also found that parenting practices reported as negative by mothers with depression had a positive relationship with behavioral problems in their children. In the group of mothers who did not have depression, the authors observed a positive relationship between negative parenting practices and behavioral problems in their children. They also observed a positive relationship between a negative marital relationship (negative definitions of the partner), negative communication and negative behaviors) and the expression of behavioral problems by the children. Altafim, McCoy and Linhares, (2018) conducted a survey of 204 mothers of children aged 3–8 years in southeastern Brazil. The authors observed relationships between low levels of emotional and behavioral self-regulation of mothers in the process of socialization of children and the development of internal (depression, anxiety) and external (aggressiveness, violence) behavioral problems in children. Also related to behavioral problems, Sebastião, Rodrigues, Pizeta and Loureiro (2020) conducted a study with 42 intact families (fathers, mothers and children) from

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a small city in southeastern Brazil. The authors observed correlations between maternal negative parental practices (inconsistent punishment, neglect, relaxed discipline, negative monitoring, and physical punishment) and their children’s behavioral problems, especially peer relationships and emotional symptoms. Negative parental practices were mainly associated with emotional problems. Regarding the effects of parental socialization on the behavior of children with autism, Portes et al. (2020) conducted a study with 45 dyads of fathers and mothers of three to seven-year-old children with autism who attended a health service in southern Brazil. The results of a group analysis indicated that children in the group perceived by parents as presenting behavioral difficulties were associated with parents who perceived themselves as authoritarian and permissive. Children characterized by prosocibility were associated with parents who perceived themselves as authoritarian.

Parenting and Mental Health Regarding the effect of parental socialization on children’s mental health, Moraes et al. (2018), in a study conducted with 487 students from public and private schools in southeastern Brazil, observed the effect of abuse and neglect and parental affection on the development of mental disorders such as anxiety, depression, and somatizations in children. The authors found that the absence of parental abuse and neglect coupled with high levels of affect was associated with low levels of mental disorders. The presence of parental abuse and neglect with low levels of affect was associated with high levels of mental disorders. And medium and high levels of affect, even in the presence of abuse and neglect, acted with a protective factor that decreased the rates of mental disorders. Lawrenz and Habigzang (2019), in a group of homosexual men from southeastern Brazil, found that there was a negative relationship between the use of parental practices characterized by affection and dialogue (responsiveness) and depressive symptoms. A regression analysis showed that parental responsiveness acts as a protective factor for the development of depression in homosexual men. Coelho et al. (2014) conducted a study with 871 pregnant adolescents in order to observe the effect of parental socialization styles on suicidal ideation. The authors observed that maternal socialization styles characterized by low levels of affect and high levels of control or those characterized as neglectful were related to higher rates of suicidal ideation. They also observed a relationship between the paternal style of neglectful socialization and higher levels of suicidal ideation. Furthermore, Siqueira-Campos et al. (2021), in a sample of 315 medical students, observed that children who perceived their mothers as neglectful compared to children of mothers perceived as having an optimal style had higher levels of depression, suicidal ideation, and low self-efficacy. On the other hand, children of mothers perceived as exercising control without affection, compared to children of mothers perceived as exercising the optimal style, had higher levels of anxiety, depression, suicidal ideation, and low self-efficacy. In addition, children of fathers

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perceived as exercising limits with affect or control without affect had higher rates of suicidal ideation compared to children of fathers perceived as exercising the optimal style.

Parenting and Psychoactive Substance Abuse Regarding the effect of parental socialization on alcohol abuse, Pinheiro and Gomide (2020) conducted a retrospective control study with Caucasian men over 21 years of age. These men were divided into two groups: alcohol consumers group (mean age = 47.2, SD = 9.1), which consisted of patients in a psychiatric hospital who were receiving treatment for alcohol dependence and a control group (mean age = 36.1, SD = 10.8), which consisted of 130 men with no history of alcohol abuse. The authors observed that negative parenting, both paternal and maternal, was associated with higher rates of alcohol abuse, being more frequent in the alcoholusing group than in the control group. A regression analysis showed that among the variables age, maternal parenting and paternal parenting, paternal parenting contributed the most to the explanation of alcohol abuse. Zuquetto et al. (2019) found that adolescents in southern Brazil who perceived their parents as non-authoritative (authoritarian, indulgent, and neglectful) were more likely to abuse alcoholic beverages. Alcohol abuse had higher levels, in increasing order, when parents were perceived as authoritarian, indulgent and negligent. Valente, Cogo-Moreira and Sanchez (2017), conducted a survey with public school students aged 11 to 15 years old, from the Northeast, South and Southeast regions of Brazil. The authors found that adolescent children of parents perceived as neglectful were more likely to belong to groups classified as abusive users/alcohol users or “multidrug” users, than children of parents perceived as authoritative, authoritarian and indulgent. Pettenon et al. (2014) compared 198 crack users, with a mean age of 28 years (SD = 8.8), with 104 non-drug users with a mean age of 27.7 years (SD = 9.65). The results indicated that crack users perceived their mothers more as neglectful and their fathers as controlling and uncaring than non-drug users. The authors also observed that non-drug users were more likely than crack users to perceive their parents as adopting optimal parenting (high levels of affection and low levels of control). Soto et al. (2017), in a qualitative study with relatives of crack users, observed that family socialization of these users was based mainly on punishments and threats, and that rules, when transmitted, used ambiguous and ineffective language.

Parenting and Sexual Behavior Reis et al. (2020) conducted a survey of 6285 adolescent students from Brazilian public schools in the South, Southeast and Northeast regions. The authors observed that the perception of parents as negligent by their children was associated with an increased risk of an active sexual life and the practice of unprotected sex. In addition,

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the authors observed that the perception of parents as neglectful was more associated with alcohol abuse, a factor that, in turn, was associated with sexually active adolescents and those who reported having unprotected sex.

Parenting and Sexual Abuse Abeche et al. (2021) conducted a control study with two groups of adolescent boys aged 10–14 years: 32 with a history of sexual abuse and 30 without a history of abuse. The authors observed that children with a history of sexual abuse, more than those without a history of abuse, perceived negative parenting practices (inconsistent punishment, neglect, lax discipline, negative monitoring, and physical punishment) related to both their fathers and mothers.

Parenting and Socioeconomic Status Altafim et al. (2018) conducted a study with 204 mothers of children aged three to 8 years. The authors verified higher levels of negative parenting practices in the domains of communication and positive discipline (without the use of physical punishment and coercion), as well as higher levels of behavioral problems in children from families of lower social classes. There were no differences by social class with respect to mothers’ emotional regulation in the socialization of their children. Gomes and Alvarenga (2016), in a study with 81 parents of children aged 4–6 years, did not observe significant differences in dimensions such as emotional support and discipline as a function of parental socioeconomic status (low, medium and high); differences were only observed in the dimension of basic care (care historically related to women), which was exercised more by parents of high socioeconomic status than by those of low socioeconomic status.

Final Considerations All these results indicate that, in Brazil, coercive practices fail to improve psychological wellbeing, internalization of values and commitment to human rights. These coercive practices appear related to increased sexual abuse of children and, together with parental neglect, are associated with maladjustment variables in children, such as behavioral problems, low self-efficacy, mental disorders, suicidal ideation, alcohol abuse, crack use and sexual abuse. In addition, parental neglect was related to increased sexual activity and unprotected sex in adolescents. Thus, it is found that these parental practices are the ones that most produce risk factors in children’s development. On the other hand, all these results indicate that parental practices based on the use of dialogue and affection are associated with positive developments related to values, self-esteem and commitment to human rights, in addition to being protective

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factors for situations of vulnerability to mental disorders, use of drugs such as crack, and risky sexual behaviors. Until 2014, studies focused mainly on the adaptation and validation of instruments for the evaluation of parental socialization in the Brazilian context. These studies analyze how parental socialization occurs in Brazil and how different practices are used depending on the sex of the caregiver and the sex of the children. In addition, these studies show the influence of socioeconomic level on family socialization. In addition, studies prior to 2014 focused mainly on the investigation of positive psychosocial adjustment variables, such as values and self-esteem. After 2014, there is an expansion of theoretical references on the parental socialization process, as well as an expansion of the variables investigated. Participants belonging to minority groups, such as autistic children and homosexual persons, are included in the samples of these studies, in addition to the fact that most of them focus on studying of the effects of parental socialization on variables of maladjustment rather than adjustment variables.

The Role of Cultural Characteristics The discrepancies in studies on the relationship between socialization practices employed by parents and child adjustment among different countries and cultures in which the socialization process develops suggest that the ideal parental socialization style depends on the cultural environment (Chao, 1994; Ho, 1989). Some authors have indicated the possibility of a socialization practice having different meanings depending on the socio-cultural context in which the socialization process is produced (Grusec et al., 1997). It seems that coercive socialization practices will only achieve positive outcomes in children in cultures where hierarchical relationships and respect for authority are positively valued. This would explain the use of coercion by parents to obtain positive outcomes in cultures in Asia and the United States, where hierarchical relationships are emphasized and encouraged (Triandis, 1995, 2001). However, these practices would not have such a positive effect in countries like Brazil where parent-child relationships have a more horizontal nature (Gouveia et al., 2004), given that Brazil has been identified as a collectivist-horizontal culture (Gouveia et al., 2002, 2003). Horizontal rather than hierarchical social and familial relationships are emphasized in collectivisthorizontal cultures. Hence, in Brazil, reasoning would be a more effective socialization practice to establish guidelines and limits on the child’s conduct (Camino et al., 2003; Martínez & García, 2007, 2008; Martínez et al., 2007, 2020; Martínez et al., 2021), while affection would be the parental practice that provides emotional support to children. It should be noted that, although the positive effects on the development of children and adolescents are related to practices and styles of socialization based on dialogue and affection, parenting practices and styles characterized by negligence and authoritarianism still predominate in Brazilian society, especially in the lower social classes (Costa et al., 2000; Weber et al., 2004; Altafim et al., 2018).

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Isabel Martínez, PhD, is a professor of Social Psychology at the University of Castilla-La Mancha (Spain). Formerly, she was a research fellow in the Social Psychology Department at the University Federal of Paraiba (Brazil). She is head of the group PSYE [Social and Developmental Psychology] of the University of Castilla-La Mancha. She has conducted research and published studies concerning adolescents’ adjustment, cultural values and family socialization. She has analyzed the relation of parental practices with different variables of adjustment in adolescents in Spain, Brazil, Portugal, and United States. Pablo Queiroz, obtained his PhD at the Federal University of Paraíba (Brazil) in 2015 and at the University of Valencia (Spain) also in 2015. He is professor of Developmental Psychology at the Faculty of Health Sciences of Trairi in the Federal University of Rio Grande do Norte (Brazil). He is a member of the Brazilian Association of Developmental Psychology. He is currently conducting research about themes regarding parental practices and their influences on human rights and on environmental values, empathy and educational practices to improve human rights.

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Leoncio Camino, obtained his PhD at the University of Louvain (Belgium) in 1974. He is a Professor Emeritus of Social Psychology at the State University of Paraíba (Brazil) and a Researcher of CNPq (Brazilian Research Foundation). He is also an editorial staff member of different national and international journals of social and political psychology. He conducts research in Social and Political Psychology and publishes studies concerning areas as political socialization, social movements, electoral behavior and prejudice. Cleonice Camino obtained her PhD at the University of Louvain (Belgium) in 1979. She is a Professor of Developmental Psychology at the State University of Paraíba (Brazil) and Researcher of CNPq (Brazilian Research Foundation). She is also an editorial staff member of different journals of developmental and social psychology. She is currently researching topics in parental practices and their influences on moral and social values development, understanding development of human rights and educational practices to improve human rights. Edie Cruise, Ph.D., has been a Research Personnel Graduate Fellow of the Government of CastillaLa Mancha, Spain and has her European Doctorate of Psychology from the University of CastillaLa Mancha. Her research interests concern parental socialization and adolescent adjustment, specifically analyzing cultural differences in these areas between the United States and Spain. Her work has centered on the relation between parental socialization styles and adolescent adjustment, including self-esteem, anti-social behavior, drug and alcohol use and academic achievement in the United States, as well as instrument validation.

Parenthood and Childrearing in Mexico: Patterns and Trends Hans Oudhof and Erika Robles

Families all around the world have an important function as a socializing agent. The transmission of values, norms, attitudes and behavioral patterns between generations, from parents to children, is of a universal nature, being fundamental for the reproduction of society as a whole and for the preparation of individuals for effective social participation, according to environmental expectations. However, the way parenting is carried out in everyday life varies among groups, regions and countries, as the beliefs, practices and socialization goals that are established differ considerably between particular cultures. According to Bornstein (2012), culture helps to construct parenting, and parents organize their caregiving activities from indigenous belief systems and behavioral patterns, and so there is a need for a cultural approach for understanding cognitions and practices related to childrearing, in order to grasp environmentally specific elements of the process. The objective of the present chapter is describing and discussing trends and patterns of parenthood and parenting practices in the Mexican context. As a starting point for our analysis, some characteristics and recent changes in family life will be reviewed.

H. Oudhof (*) · E. Robles Present Address: Facultad de Ciencias de la Conducta, Universidad Autónoma del Estado de México, Toluca, Mexico e-mail: [email protected] E. Robles Facultad de Ciencias de la Conducta, Universidad Autónoma del Estado de México, Toluca, Mexico © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_14

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Family Life in Mexico Family has traditionally been a key institution in Mexican culture, constituting a basic element in the country’s social organization. Its role as a network for providing support, protection and satisfaction is fundamental for the vast majority of the population, which organizes its lifestyle around the family group as a central element. Its importance can be illustrated statistically by some data provided by the National Institute of Statistics and Geography: 95.8% of the total population was living in family households in 2020, and family-type arrangements constituted 88.6% of the total number of households in 2017 (Instituto Nacional de Estadística y Geografía , 2021). Although the central role in society of the family group has remained constant in time, several changes have occurred in its sociodemographic characteristics in recent decades. The average household size was 5.4 members in 1969 (López, 2001), but diminished to 4.0 in 2005 and 3.6 in 2020. This is associated with a considerable fall of fertility rate in women aged 12 years and older, from an average of 7.2 children in 1960 to 2.6 in 2000 and 2.1 in 2020 (INEGI, 2021). The large families with a considerable number of children that used to be common in Mexico have gradually become more exceptional, and smaller sized families tend to predominate nowadays. Another transformation that can be observed refers to the traditional idea of marriage as a life-long commitment which constitutes the basis for establishing a family. Divorce or separation used to be stigmatized as a deviation from the norm or even a failure, but recent generations have adopted different attitudes towards the dissolution of couple unions and relationships in general, accepting the idea that marriage don’t necessary last ‘till death do us part’. The number of marriages at a national level has even declined, whereas a rising trend can be seen in divorces. As a consequence, the ratio of divorces per 100 marriages has risen from 15.1 to 31.7 between 2010 and 2019 (INEGI, 2021). This cultural change has also led to the simplification of legal procedures, which allow people to achieve a much quicker divorce than used to be the case in past times, when it was a complex and timeconsuming process. Family structures have also undergone significant changes in the past decades, with a clear tendency towards pluralism of living arrangements and organization forms (Quilodrán & Castro, 2009). Although dual parent families continue to predominate, the proportion of single-parent homes has increased gradually, constituting 18.1% of the total number of Mexican households in 2020 (INEGI, 2021). López et al. (2012) report the results of a study conducted by the Institute of Social Studies in eight major cities across the country, identifying the existence of 11 different households: dual parent families with small children (25.8%), dual parent families with teenagers or older children (14.6%), extended families (9.6%), reconstituted families (3.8%), young couples without children (4.7%), couples whose children have left the house (6.2%), couples of the same sex (0.6%), single mothers with children (16.8%), single fathers with children (2.8%), co-residents (4.1%) and one-person households (11.1%).

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As can be observed, the family as an institution is clearly going through a transition process, with tendencies towards a major degree of diversity in size and composition. Currently, the coexistence of traditional and more contemporary elements provides a complex scheme of multiple family group arrangements, characterized by the diversity of the roles and activities fulfilled by its members. Nevertheless, the family continuous to play a central role in the lifestyles of the vast majority of Mexican people, being highly valuated as a source of pride, identity and support; it is also considered more important than other groups and social institutions. This phenomenon is known as ‘familismo’, which implies a high degree of solidarity and interdependence between its members and placing group interests above the individual needs (Gonzales, 2019). The combination of changing aspects and continuity in present-day family characteristics shape the interactions of relatives and constitute the context for a better understanding of recent trends in parenthood and childrearing.

Motherhood and Fatherhood Motherhood and fatherhood acquire different meanings in time. During most of the twentieth century, a traditional model of parenthood prevailed in the majority of Mexican families, based on a clear distribution of gender roles between parents. The male task consisted of functioning as an authority figure and fulfilling the provider role, whereas women were dedicated to childrearing and domestic labor activities (Manni, 2010). In this model, mothers’ activities were focused on giving love and sacrificing their own needs and interests in behalf of the other family members. This stereotype of the ‘self-denying mother’ was identified completely with the maternal role. Fathers were expected to be respected and obeyed, exercising their power in the family setting through undisputed supremacy and the establishment of limits and rules (Díaz-Guerrero, 1999; González et al., 1996). This image of the traditional Mexican family has gradually undergone changes, mainly because in recent decades women have substantially increased their participation in education and in the economically active population. According to Bringas et al. (2004), the decade of the 1970s is a turning point in female roles and reproduction practices, as women began to postpone marriage and motherhood and give more priority to their involvement in public life outside the household domain. As a result, the average time that mothers spend on rearing small children, measured as the period from the birth of the first child to the moment when the last one reaches the age of 6 years, was reduced from 25 to 10 years between 1970 and 1999 (López, 2001). However, women continue to have the main responsibility for childrearing, taking care of other people at home and domestic tasks, as the distribution of these activities at home between men and women is highly unequal. Based on data from the National Survey on the Use of Time, Pedrero (2018) has calculated that the average time women spend on domestic activities and caretaking is three times

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higher than the male contribution: 39 vs. 13 h per week. For many women, this implies a challenge to reconcile the demands related to their roles in the public sphere and the time spent on domestic tasks (Cristiani et al., 2014; Hernández & Ibarra, 2019). This is illustrated by a study of Castañeda-Rentería and Contreras (2019) among female professional workers and mothers from the city of Guadalajara, who express a constant tension between complying with maternity and the accomplishment of the desired professional development. The participants said that they employ various strategies to enable them to carry out parenting activities, such as seeking part-time jobs, applying for institutional support and substituting the number of hours spent with their children with quality time. Nevertheless, they experience feelings of guilt for not fulfilling the traditional mandates of motherhood. On the other hand, there is also a tendency to opt for not having children in certain social sectors, particularly in middle class women with a high educational level who live in urban and industrialized regions. This can be observed in the declining fertility rates in more prosperous zones of the country, such as Mexico City, Baja California and Quintana Roo, in contrast to states as Chiapas, which is characterized by a higher degree of social marginality (Linares et al., 2017). The exercise of fatherhood in Mexico is also mediated by the beliefs and values of different socio-cultural environments that co-exist in the country, as well as the kind of couple relationship and the customs and practices in the family of origin (Salguero et al., 2018). The results of Abad’s (2019) study show that a traditional and crossgenerational model of paternity persists among males from rural areas of the state of Morelos, characterized by emotional coldness and a rigid treatment of children. In urban areas, young fathers have been found to seek a different significance of fatherhood, based on its association with concepts as love, understanding, caretaking, kindness and family (Balam et al., 2018). It is increasingly common that young males participate more actively in caretaking, both in the amount of time spent with their children and in its intensity (Rojas, 2016), establishing mechanisms of dialogue and communication and paying attention to the affective aspects of the relationship. A tendency towards generational changes in the ideas and practices associated with the exercise of fatherhood is gradually taking place. Recent studies have shown that some contemporary fathers question their own paternity and don’t want to repeat the cold and distant kind of relationship they had with their own fathers. In contrast, they wish to be involved in family life beyond the provider role, performing their paternity in a responsible and affective way, spending more time with their offspring and attending to its needs (Jiménez, 2012; Salguero et al., 2014). However, these changes take place slowly and are concentrated mainly in certain population sectors: younger generations from urban areas and with high educational levels. Fathers who are trying to leave behind traditional practices and seek new kinds of relationships with their children face several challenges, particularly related to the excessive amount of time they have to spend to transport to their workplace and long labor days. This not only limits the time they can spend with their children, but also implies an emotional burden regarding their participation in family life (Salguero et al., 2018). Trying to be a ‘modern’ father and fulfilling the role of both provider

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and caretaker has been found to have repercussions on physical and mental health, due to the excessive demands and expectations of the environment and may lead to conflicts in couple relationships and cause emotional distance from the children (Colín, 2021). The context of demographic, economic and cultural changes that have occurred in Mexican society do not only explain the transformations in the characteristics of family life in general but should also be taken into account to understand the diversification of contemporary parenthood. For many mothers and fathers, the conditions and demands related to their role and participation in caretaking, childrearing and domestic activities are very different from the ones that prevailed in previous generations. Thus, multiple ideas and practices related to parenthood co-exist nowadays, generating a complex combination of traditional and modern elements in the way parents and children interact in different families. This is also reflected in changes in parenting practices, as will be analyzed in the next section.

Parenting Practices in Mexico Socialization in the family group takes place by means of parenting practices. According to Darling & Steinberg (1993), these are the behaviors defined by a specific content and by certain goals formulated for the development of children. Thus, they should be understood as operating in fairly circumscribed socialization domains, such as academic achievement, social skills or appropriate manners. According to the authors, they differ from parenting styles, which describe the parent–child interaction over a broad range of situations, whereas practices, by definition, are more specific and have a direct influence on the development of particular child’s behaviors and characteristics, contributing to the attainment of socialization goals. Childrearing practices are developed and carried out by the parents, with their beliefs about how their sons and daughters should be educated and what they should achieve in life, according to certain cultural norms and expectations. Nevertheless, in the contemporary view regarding parenting, these practices are considered to be of a bi-directional nature, as a part of a dynamic interaction process. Thus, the children’s role in the socialization process is not that of a merely passive spectator, as each of them has their own subjectivity and individuality, so they generally react in different ways to the socialization practices exercised by their parents. Additionally, throughout their growth process and development, and particularly during the stage of adolescence, they increasingly demand that their opinions, needs and interests, which might not necessarily coincide with their parents’ views, should be taken into account (Oudhof & Robles, 2014). Sharing different experiences and ideas, reciprocity and negotiation take place between the members of the family, and therefore socialization should be seen as a dynamic and interactive process. Consequently, parenting practices in contemporary families are not rigid and unilaterally imposed by parents, but acquire a certain degree of flexibility and may be adjusted

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according to the child’s needs and characteristics. Casáis et al. (2017) indicate that the study and understanding of childrearing in general, and particularly the practices and behaviors involved, require the recognition of the significant meanings related to the perceptions of all persons involved, both parents and children. Parenting is oriented towards the physical, psychological and social development of children, and the promotion of their wellbeing and quality of life. Also, it should facilitate their appropriation of the socio-cultural norms, values and behavioral patterns, in order to promote their effective integration into social life. Therefore, childrearing is a complex process that involves a broad range of tasks and activities, such as exercising control, providing support, taking care of health and hygiene, assuring favorable material conditions, supervision of academic performance and school-related issues, bi-directional communication between parents and children, amongst others. Parenting practices are conceptually of a multi-dimensional nature, and their analysis should consider the relation of several variables related with the child’s adjustment and competences (Oliva et al., 2007). In the Mexican context, parental beliefs and behaviors used to be characterized by the emphasis on the principles of children’s obedience and showing respect towards their parents, which are considered to be important socio-cultural virtues for the country’s population (Díaz-Guerrero, 1999). In this traditional model, which prevailed during most of the twentieth century in the vast majority of Mexican families, authoritarian and asymmetrical relationships prevailed in the parent-child interaction (Leñero, 1996). There used to be little space for dialogue and negotiation, and the children’s role was essentially reduced to following the established family rules and norms and adjusting their behavior to their parents’ expectations. They were not expected to participate actively in their own socialization process. Some early empirical studies on parenting in Mexico report certain changes in childrearing ideas and behaviors of parents in the decade of the 1990s. The importance of stimulating formal education enrollment is stressed as one of the main socialization goals for both sons and daughters. Also, they show that parents began to pay more attention to the affective needs of their children, trying to raise them by giving advice, trust and support as the most frequently used parenting activities. These studies report a more frequent use of communication strategies when behavior correction of their offspring is deemed necessary. However, authoritarian practices and even physical punishment continued to be present when children showed undesired behavior, such as bad performance at school, lying and aggressiveness (Garduño & Cervantes, 1995; Martin, 1991). Currently, much more is known about parenting in Mexico, as researchers from different universities in various regions of the country have developed projects on this topic in recent decades. An important tendency is that studies are based not only on the self-reports of mothers and fathers regarding the way they perform their educational tasks and activities, but also address the children’s perception of the process. More quantitative research has been performed, developing valid and reliable measuring instruments in samples of parents and children, which have been adjusted to the cultural environment. Additionally, qualitative designs have also been employed for understanding parenting practices in contemporary Mexican families.

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Recent Studies The findings of recent research, carried out in several populations in distinct parts of the country, indicate that positive childrearing strategies, based on affection, support and communication, prevail in many Mexican families nowadays. Flores et al. (2008), in a study performed with parents and children in the state of Yucatán, found that more dialogue-based behaviors are employed, whereas more negative actions, such as physical punishment and irritability, are less frequently applied. Similar results are reported in studies among parents from Sonora (Frías et al., 2012) and the State of Mexico (Oudhof et al., 2012), indicating clearly that a shift towards less authoritarian childrearing has been taken place. When fathers and mothers consider that correction behavior is necessary, they prefer talking with their children and giving advice, using actions as grounding and scolding for behavior correction, instead of physical punishment. Also, all three studies highlight the importance that parents attach to their children’s performance at school, setting high aspirational standards for the academic achievement of both sons and daughters. Infante & Martínez (2016) found that negotiation and affective strategies, characterized by attachment and closeness, dominate among parents in San Luis Potosí, who also try to promote success based on their children’s interests. In a study conducted in mothers from three regions in the country, Oudhof et al. (2019) detected that the participants emphasize supervision, health care, a good socio– emotional environment and communication as the most frequent childrearing activities, whereas behavior correction obtained lower scores. These changes that have taken place in childrearing reflect the adoption of different beliefs and attitudes by many Mexican parents; this can be observed in the use of control and the way rules and limits are transmitted. Parental control can acquire different forms (Anderson & Branstetter, 2012). The use of supervision of the whereabouts of their children, which consists of knowing where they are, who they are with, what they do after school, and monitoring other daily activities, is generally viewed in a positive way, as it involves a reciprocal interaction and mutual communication between parents and children. According to Crockett et al. (2007), this kind of control is interpreted positively by most children, as a sign that their parents show interest in them. On the other hand, psychological control occurs when parents use intrusiveness, manipulation and an excessive degree of restriction of children’s aspirations for autonomy and freedom, which may have negative consequences on mental health and generate behavioral and emotional problems (Solís & Manzanares, 2019). Studies have shown that both mothers and fathers in Mexican families make very frequent use of monitoring their offspring’s activities, as they consider it important to be aware of their daily situations and behaviors (Oudhof et al., 2016, 2019). Flores et al. (2008) found that negatively oriented punitive discipline strategies and restrictive control mechanisms are not frequently employed. Another fundamental aspect of childrearing is the provision of support and affection, as it is believed that contemporary families should function as a network of emotional and material care for all members. Therefore, parents are expected to

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show comprehension, warmth, closeness and empathy in the interaction with their children, as a part of authoritative practices that generally also produce better socialization results (Steinberg, 2001). In a study among Mexican university students, Rodríguez et al. (2011) found that the participants consider that their parents frequently show interest in their activities and provide the support that they need. Andrade et al. (2012) identified that family support is considered to be an important factor for promoting health in adolescents. The communication dimension of parenting is also important, due to the bi-directionality of contemporary socialization processes. Also, the establishment of effective and reciprocal mechanisms of interaction facilitates the exercise of parental monitoring and the provision of support that children require. The studies performed by Flores et al. (2008) and Oudhof et al. (2016, 2019) show that Mexican parents nowadays frequently employ communication strategies as a part of their parenting practices, by means of conversations with their children about daily experiences and important issues, as well as allowing or encouraging the expression of emotions.

Parenting in Different Family Types The growing diversification of family structures in Mexico makes the analysis of childrearing activities in distinct kind of families an interesting research topic. Some comparisons between parenting practices in single-parent and dual-parent families have been performed in recent years. In a study of the way mothers from the Valley of Toluca carry out ten different rearing tasks, Robles & Oudhof (2006) obtained no statistically significant differences in the frequency of realizing any of these tasks between single mothers and participants from dual parent families. Rodríguez et al. (2011) compared the perception of parenting at home in a sample of university students, obtaining small but statistically significant differences according to family type. The participants from single parent homes showed slightly higher scores on the factors of showing interest in the child’s activities and providing support, whereas the means for giving orientation were somewhat higher in participants from dual parent families. Rubio et al. (2018) analyzed the perception of maternal rearing of adolescents from the city of Mérida, obtaining higher scores for the participants from single parent families on the aspects of communication, warmth, emphasis on achievement and school support, compared to the means of the dual-parent group. No differences were found in the factors of supervision and monitoring, and discipline and limits. Based on a study in female headed single-parent households, Flores (2021) indicates that these families generally fulfill their socialization functions adequately. According to the perception of adolescent children, their mothers maintain good communication forms, supervise their whereabouts, provide support and stimulate achievement and success.

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The findings of these studies contradict the (still widespread) stereotypes regarding single-parent families, which are frequently seen as structures which have negative consequences for the adjustment and wellbeing of children, stating that the traditional nuclear family with the presence of both parents is supposed to be ‘superior’. This image does not match the reports of parents and the perception of children who belong to single-parent structures, indicating clearly that childrearing in these kinds of households can function well when certain basic conditions are met, particularly regarding the parents’ psychological wellbeing, the quality of caretaking and the family’s social environment (Golombok, 2016).

Conclusions The characteristics and dynamics of parenting in contemporary Mexican families should be understood from their relations with the sociocultural environment, which has an impact on the way parents and children interact in daily life. These are reflected in the multiple changes that have taken place in family structures, composition and size, being part of a complex process of transition and diversification. Simultaneously, continuity can also be observed, particularly in the importance the family has for the vast majority of the Mexican population and the interdependence between its members. In this context, the distribution of household activities and the composition of gender roles have undergone significant changes in recent decades, leading to different forms of exercising motherhood and fatherhood. Although mothers continue to be the cornerstone of caretaking and childrearing in most households, their growing participation in education and the labor force have led to a situation where many of them are no longer dedicated exclusively to domestic life. In the case of the fathers, a tendency towards more involvement in parenting and domestic life has occurred, fulfilling a role that goes beyond the traditional provider function and establishing closer and more affectionate bonds with their children. However, these changes in parenthood have not taken place at the same pace and with the same intensity in all Mexican families; they are concentrated mainly in younger generations and in the urban professional sectors with higher educational levels. The studies on parenting that have been performed in recent years provide a picture that shows the transition of a traditional model, based on authoritarian and vertical childrearing strategies, towards the prevalence of contemporary ideas and behaviors. Parents focus more on support, affection and communication, and tend to exercise control in a more authoritative way. This shift towards positive parenting patterns can also be observed in the role of children, who participate in a much more active way in decision making at home and in their own socialization process. Finally, we consider that the growing diversification of family structures and living arrangements should be taken into account in future research on parenthood and childrearing in Mexico. Some comparative studies on parenting in single and dual parent families have been carried in recent times, but a better understanding of the interaction between parents and children in diverse family types is needed.

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Quilodrán, J., & Castro, T. (2009). Nuevas dinámicas familiares. Estudios Demográficos y Urbanos, 24(2), 283–291. https://doi.org/10.24201/edu.v24i2.2138 Robles, E., & Oudhof, H. (2006). Rearing task in single-parent and dual-parent families. In H. Oudhof & J. E. Rink (Eds.), Youngsters between freedom and social limits (Vol. 6, pp. 117–125). Shaker. Rodríguez, B., Oudhof, H., González Arratia, N. I., & Unikel, C. (2011). Desarrollo de una escala para medir la percepción de la crianza parental en jóvenes estudiantes mexicanos. Pensamiento Psicológico, 9(17), 9–20. https://revistas.javerianacali.edu.co/index.php/ pensamientopsicologico/article/view/152 Rojas, O. L. (2016). Mujeres, hombres y vida familiar en México. Persistencia de la inequidad de género anclada en la desigualdad social. Revista Interdisciplinaria de Estudios de Género, 2(3), 73–101. https://doi.org/10.24201/eg.v2i3.4 Rubio, M. M., Torres, S. E., & Flores, M. M. (2018). Prácticas parentales de crianza y regulación emocional en adolescentes de familias monoparentales y biparentales. In R. Díaz, L. I. Reyes & F. López, La psicología social en México, Vol. IV (pp. 685–702). Asociación Mexicana de Psicología Social. Salguero, A., Córdoba, D. I., & Sapién, S. (2014). Dificultades, malestares y quejas de algunos hombres sobre su paternidad. Revista Electrónica de Psicología Iztacala, 17(2), 455–480. http:// www.revistas.unam.mx/index.php/repi/article/view/46997 Salguero, A., Córdoba, D., & Sapién, S. (2018). Masculinidad y paternidad: los riesgos en la salud a partir de los aprendizajes de género. Psicología y Salud, 28(1), 37–44. https://doi.org/10.25009/ pys.v28i1.2546 Solís, G. L., & Manzanares, E. (2019). Control psicológico parental y problemas internalizados y externalizados en adolescentes de Lima Metropolitana. Revista Colombiana de Psicología, 28(1), 29–48. https://doi.org/10.15446/rcp.v28n1.66288 Steinberg, L. (2001). We know some things: Parent – Adolescent relationships in retrospect and prospect. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11(1), 1–19. https://doi.org/10.1111/1532-7795. 00001

Hans Oudhof is researcher and teacher at the Faculty of Behavioral Sciences of the Autonomous University of the State of Mexico. He obtained his Ph.D. in Psychological, Pedagogical and Sociological Sciences at the University of Groningen, the Netherlands. He is a member of the Mexican National Researcher System. His primary research interests are family, parenting, attitudes towards social limits and adolescence. Contact: [email protected] Erika Robles is researcher and teacher at the Faculty of Behavioral Sciences of the Autonomous University of the State of Mexico. She obtained her Ph.D. in Social Sciences at this university. She is a member of the Mexican National Researcher System. Her primary research interests are family, parenting, attachment and childhood. Contact: [email protected]

Conflict and Parenting in Burundi Lidewyde H. Berckmoes

Introduction: Parenting and Conflict Since the first socialization studies by anthropologists (Mead, 1928; Levine, 1974; Whiting & Whiting, 1975), there is wide recognition of the importance of context in shaping parenting and childhood socialization. Parenting concerns the goal-oriented activities by parents and others, and together with other intentional or programmatic efforts to learning and development, inform childhood socialization (Levine, 2010). Often inspired by functionalist perspectives, the early studies portrayed parenting and childhood socialization as “adaptive” to environmental conditions. For instance, in African societies reproductive strategies of having many children and parental investment directed at infant survival have often been explained as adaptive responses to environmental risks (Levine et al., 1994). Later research criticized the “adaptivist” assumption, and instead described environmental pressures as culturally and historically mediated – thus also sometimes leading to parenting goals and strategies that negatively affect child development and that have become outdated (Levine, 2010). In my own work, situated in the African Great Lakes region, I have been especially interested in understanding whether and how conflict as a contextual stressor may interact with parenting, and how potential negative effects may be prevented or addressed. My concern with the interaction between conflict and parenting in the Great Lakes region stems from the long history of repeated outbreaks of mass violence there. The Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC), Rwanda, and Burundi have seen successive outbreaks of mass violence since the mid-1950; when the countries sought independence from their colonizing power Belgium. For instance, in Burundi, people often state the sequence of years that mark mass violent

L. H. Berckmoes (*) African Studies Centre Leiden, Leiden University, Leiden, The Netherlands e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_15

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events to account for this somber legacy: 1965, 1969, 1972, 1988, 1991, 1993–2005, and most recently, 2015. The latter marks the beginning of an ongoing political crisis. In my research, I am interested in understanding how these conflict experiences inform cultural understandings of what good parenting amounts to, and how parenting may seek to prepare next generations for better futures. I conducted ethnographic research on parenting in Burundi in 2014 and 2015 as part of a project on the intergenerational transmission of violence and resilience under the umbrella of the University of Amsterdam and UNICEF Burundi (Berckmoes et al., 2017; Hendriks et al., 2019; Charak et al. 2021). The research sought to document perspectives on parenting goals and strategies of fathers and mothers who came of age during the civil war (1993–2005), focusing on parents in the capital Bujumbura and parental investment in the early childhood years. In this chapter, I build on the findings from this project, contextualized with findings from previous and continuing involvement in research in the region. I show how in Burundi the enduring effects of conflict in society lead many parents to feel unable to pursue their culturally desired parenting goals, which largely continue to be framed with reference to goals and practices of precolonial, rural society. Parents describe current family and parenting practices in terms of “adaptation” to postwar poverty and hostility. Nonetheless, an important concern is whether these “adjustments” may, unintendedly, augment experiences of abandonment and neglect among the most vulnerable children.

Research Methodology Between November 2014 and April 2015, I conducted fieldwork research among parents in Bujumbura, Burundi with the help of a young Burundian female research assistant. The study took place in the months prior to the 2015 presidential elections. We focused on parents living on Bujumbura’s densely populated northern periphery, as this area was especially hard-hit by the civil war that started in 1993 and lasted until 2005. Given our focus on parenting in the early childhood years, we interviewed 20 mothers and fathers with at least one child aged 0–4 as research participants. They had between one and five children, lived in destitute, poor, and middle-class economic circumstances. In addition to these 20 participants, we had conversations and interviews with a dozen other parents in Bujumbura. We used conversational, semi-structured and group interview techniques, often accompanied with observations during home visits and followed by additional conversations or follow-up questions using social media and telephone texting. All names used in the study are pseudonyms to ensure the anonymity of our research participants.

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Bujumbura’s Northern Periphery Bujumbura was established as the administrative center of the Belgian colonial administration in the African Great Lakes region after World War One (it was then called Usumbura). At the time, the city was divided in areas designated for specific racial-occupational population categories, including Belgians, people of Asian descent and those working for the Belgian administration (Dickerman, 1984). In the first decades of colonial rule, a large part of Bujumbura’s population came from Rwanda and Democratic Republic of Congo (Zaïre). Later more migrants from Burundi’s rural hinterlands came in search of employment and plots for housing (Ndayikuriye, 1997). On the northern periphery, in Ngagara neighborhood, the colonial administration developed a housing scheme for civil servants, while the adjacent Kamenge became home to the poorer segments of society (Dickerman, 1984). Kamenge was soon characterized as a quartier populaire, housing many people with few regulations and minimal infrastructure. The colonial planning decisions based on segregation played a pivotal role during the civil war that started in 1993. While upper-class areas of the city were largely spared the wartime violence, the poorer peripheral neighborhoods were strongly affected. On the northern periphery, heavy fighting broke out between the Tutsidominated army, many of whom resided in the former colonial housing schemes of Ngagara, and Hutu rebels, who early in the war set up their army headquarters in Kamenge. Ethnic cleansing by youth militias backed by political leaders and community elders (Muntunutwiwe, 2013; Berckmoes, 2015) forged further ethnic segregation and prevented population mobility between the neighborhoods. Kamenge and some adjacent neighborhoods zones saw nearly complete destruction. In view of the vast material and social devastation on the northern periphery, challenges for reconstruction were, and remain, immense. Among the neighborhood zones that figure in our study, especially Kamenge and Cibitoke are home to many people who are still recovering their assets, and infrastructure remains limited. Gihosha and Ngagara, slightly better off in terms of amenities and infrastructure, attract people of lower middle class or those moving up on the social ladder. Ethnic segregation was no longer enforced after the war, yet the various neighborhoods remain associated with competing ethnic and political constituencies (Berckmoes, 2014).

Childhood Memories of War The civil war profoundly shaped the childhood experiences of the fathers and mothers we interviewed. Their generation were toddlers or of primary school age when the war broke out. Several parents recalled witnessing violence as children: “We saw murdered people in the street, dead bodies, blood still running because the killing had just happened, and the neighborhood smelled bad . . . due to people who

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were killed and not buried.” (Emma, Ngagara, 2015). Other participants had lost their fathers, uncles, and brothers, their house and family assets, had experienced flight, and encountered challenges in their pursuit of formal education: I was enrolled at [school name] of Ngagara. I could not continue but skipped a year and I started again in another school in my province [of origin] in the south [of Burundi]. There were problems because there were children who had lost their parents and who were affected psychologically. People threw mortars, grenades to the extent that I also left that lyceum.” (Clovis, Kamenge, 2015).

Only one participant remarked that there was no effect of the civil war on her life. Born in the middle-class neighborhood Ngagara in 1986, the family of this young woman may have been able to protect her from the worst agonies of war. Likely, she had also learned to ignore political tensions, discounting them in the present as well: “I look at [politics] as if it does not concern me” (Nadine, Cibitoke, 2015).

Starting a Family With many of Bujumbura’s inhabitants being the first- or second-generation descendants of rural-urban migrants, the traditional roots of Burundi’s rural, patrilineal society remain strongly reflected in current ideals about family and households. Traditionally, parents were expected to provide every son with a piece of land to build a house and for farming or cattle herding. Daughters were expected to move in with their husbands or his family upon marriage and had no claim to land or material belongings. (Albert, 1964; Ntampaka, 1997). The growing pressure on land and widespread poverty among most households in Burundi, however, mean that few families can live up to these expectations. 70 percent of Burundi’s population lives below the poverty line (Giani et al. 2015). Many young Burundian men lament that they are therefore forced to postpone plans for marriage and a family of their own. At the same time, on Bujumbura’s periphery, independent householding and family life is achieved in various alternative ways as well. While the alterations largely result from the lack of means to abide by customary ideals, change experienced is also understood as being at least indirectly affected by the civil war. (see also, Berckmoes and White, 2014, Sommers and Uvin, 2011). We met several fathers who built their houses on the family plot, despite the limited space. For example, Gabriel and his younger brother have both built their houses next to their father’s. To give a picture of the pressure on space, with the old father, his new wife and child, Gabriel’s and his brother’s families, and with four students who rent an annex built on the plot to procure extra income, a total of six adults, six youth and six children are sharing the 50 to 60 m2 plot in Kamenge. Gabriel explained that their family’s restricted means is at least in part due to his father having lost his job during the war. Some other young parents we met remain in the family home until they can afford to build or rent their own place. Others rent a house on a plot with other tenants, while the poorest parents, often single mothers, share a room with, usually, peers in similar destitute situations.

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Traditionally, the groom’s parents also contribute to the payment of bridal wealth to the bride-to-be’s parents. Since the introduction of the 28 January 1993 decree law (Ntampaka, 1997), the payment of bridal wealth is not legally obligatory, and marriage is concluded between the couple only. Yet our interviewees generally hold on to the ideal of marriage as a family affair. Due to limited means, however, most young couples we met, moved in together following an out of wedlock pregnancy - generally referred to as un accident in French (Sommers and Uvin, 2011; Berckmoes and White, 2014). Several mothers who moved in with their boyfriends following an unplanned pregnancy hoped that their marriage illegal – as co-habitation was colloquially referred to in French – would one day be made official in accordance with customary and legal requirements. For instance, Elodie, who lived with her aunt when she fell pregnant, hoped that once her boyfriend found a job, he would legalize the marriage. For them, a further step would be the payment of bridal wealth to her broken family – which indeed happened several years later (in 2017), an occasion to also reunite with her father with whom she had lost touch several years earlier. Despite the frequency of unplanned pregnancies, the community and (extended) families generally regard these as extremely problematic, especially when the pregnant girl is still enrolled in school. Recently, the government has introduced a policy that prohibits pregnant girls to stay in school and requires them to write a written excuse to the minister to ask for enrolment in a different school after having given birth (Ruzibiza, 2020). In some cases, the girls are thrown out on the streets as a form of punishment. For instance, Shana explained: “I was in the sixth grade of primary school when I conceived and it was the beginning of my problems because I was chased away by my family” (Kamenge, 2015). As a girl’s mother is also held responsible for her daughter’s chastity, moreover, the mother of the pregnant girl risks repercussions too. To save the family honor, the families sometimes put pressure on the young culprits to get married. On the girl’s side, a further motivation to push for marriage is to limit the extra expenses that a baby in the house brings. In general, such harsh punishments are seen as legitimate responses to premarital sex. However, some of the people we spoke to suggested that many people are becoming less severe in their objections. For instance, Elodie’s aunt showed more understanding for the unplanned pregnancy, as revealed in Elodie’s answer to our question whether she was not worried to tell her aunt: “No, it was normal because she had given advice [about contraceptives] but it happens, it happens and she tried to adapt to it” (Kamenge, 2015). Similarly, Elise explained that her extended family members positively intervened when she revealed her unplanned pregnancy: “I had no problem because in my family there are several doctors and they advised my family to never anger me because that is not good for someone who is pregnant” (Elise, Ngagara, 2015). On the other side, among our research participants who were chased from their families following their pregnancies, the appreciation of manque d’amour, or a lack of love, was commonly offered to explain what had happened. In Burundi, the “lack of love” is widespread understood as a societal ill resulting from the civil war.

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Household Compositions In Burundi, the prevailing norm, also legally, is the monogamous, nuclear family. Yet households rarely consist of only the nuclear family members. A recent study on Burundi shows that both direct consequences of war-time violence, such as battlerelated mortality and mobility, and indirect consequences, notably through coping mechanisms such as child fostering, contribute to changes in household structures following the civil war (Mercier et al., 2020). Among our research participants, many parents shared their home with younger siblings or nephews and nieces. They usually explained this as to share in the burden of childcare of their family – a form of child fostering. Internal family conflict can be another reason for taking in siblings or others. For instance, Gabriel took in a halfsister and an adopted sister after their widowed father and the latter’s new wife, next door, chased them out (Gabriel, Kamenge, 2014). Other times, relatives move in because they look for education or employment opportunities in Bujumbura, where they are deemed better than upcountry. Notably, some families we met also took in people not related to them. For instance, Bibi and her husband (Ngagara, 2015) accommodate an old classmate who was struggling to make ends meet. In return for the hospitality, he tutors the children. In our study, strikingly many households were also marked by the absence of men. Men appeared absent for various reasons. Some husbands were said to have migrated to DRC and Tanzania in search of better employment opportunities, while other men moved to escape parental responsibilities. For instance, we met Matata on several occasions, and he explained that he left his family to pursue his own dreams in Uganda. He moved not long after he and his girlfriend were forced to marry by their respective families following an unplanned pregnancy. Households without men are generally condemned as deviant, despite representing an estimated one fifth of all households on Bujumbura’s northern neighborhoods (Courtois, 2016). Single women often face difficulties in making ends meet. When Matata left his wife, for instance, she even contemplated to move to a refugee camp in neighboring DRC in the hope to find humanitarian aid to support her children. Her sister-in-law, a worldly young woman, explained that the conditions in the camp were likely worse than the poverty that awaited her and the children at the grandparents’. Single mothers who could not return to their parental home said that they tried their best to find another man, even though this recourse could also backfire, as Nima explained: I conceived the first time, and the man gave nothing to help his child, and I wondered where to find the means to raise the child. I looked for another man to give me the money to find what was necessary, when he found out about my second pregnancy, he also left me and I found a third husband, who also made me pregnant and then disappeared. (Nima, Kamenge, 2015)

Weakened by a man’s absence, these types of households, besides facing economic challenges, are perceived as vulnerable to attack, both morally and physically (Courtois, 2016). In this regard, Josiane from Kamenge explained that she felt afraid

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after her husband migrated to pursue employment opportunities abroad (2015). Not long after his departure, their house was almost robbed, and she felt haunted by the devil. To feel safer, she moved with her three children to live with her mother and sister, and she regularly attended church services. To explain the absence of the men, many women referred to economic logic to explain why they, in high demand, switch lovers easily. They pointed to the war, which they feel has resulted in a relatively low number of marriageable men in the community. Population figures do not necessarily suggest an unequal distribution of men and women in Bujumbura, but people we spoke to suggested that many urban boys and young men, who would now be in their late 20s/30s, were killed in the war. For instance, Anatol (b. 1985, Kamenge) attested that many of his primary school classmates disappeared with the war, as victims and/or after enlistment in rebel movements. Some women also lamented that there were few ways in which they could hold men accountable for the children they fathered, while men sometimes expressed anger about women trying to trap them through pregnancies. Fatherhood, traditionally and in law, is, seen as a voluntary bond (Ntampaka, 1997).

Family Planning Burundian parents generally speak of children as a “treasure” (Emile, Ngagara, 2015) and as “bringing joy” to a family (Juliane, Ngagara, 2015). Boys are seen as securing the lineage and tend to be referred as their guerriers (warriors, in French), which shows notions about boys and men as protectors of the family and community (Manirakiza, 1994). Girls are believed to be good helpers in the household, easier to educate, and to unlock a bridal wealth when they marry. Among our research participants, preference for boys or girls seemed to depend mostly on if they already had children of the other sex. Having children is also important for recognition as an adult man or woman in society: “[What I like most about being a parent is] firstly, my social rank, being accepted in society, having a say in the family” (Clovis, Kamenge, 2015). For women, having more than one child is the preferred standard. For instance, Gabriel explained that his wife wanted a second child, “because according to Burundian custom, a wife needs to give birth to multiple children, but she also said, ‘if you refuse a second child I will go elsewhere, I am incapable of staying with just one child’” (Gabriel, Kamenge, 2015). In our study, the interviewed women have one to five children – lower than the country-average of six. The high country-average is sometimes explained by reference to labor intensive, rural livelihoods as well as intergenerational interdependency, given the few social security policies and pension schemes in place. The lower number of children per woman in our study may stem from the urban context where many people are not (only) involved in agriculture, or from the fact that we focused on men and women with children in their early childhood,

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implying that the women are still in their reproductive age. Nonetheless, most of the parents we spoke to, said that they planned to have two or three children maximum. Family planning is justified mostly in relation to the generally challenging economic circumstances and the high costs involved for children’s nutrition, health, and schooling. Since the war, prices have risen steeply, and parents worry that costs will continue to rise. In addition, they are not sure about the extent to which they can count on government support for their children’s health and education: “I think that soon the government will change the [legislative] articles [to restrict the number of children who can benefit from government support] because our President always says, ‘Give birth to those for whom you are able to take responsibility!’” (Gabriel, Kamenge, 2015). Following the war, the transition government implemented policies for free health care for pregnant women and children under five, and free primary school tuition (in 2006 and 2005 respectively), but otherwise has intervened little in family life (Courtois, 2016).

Gendered Parenting Like in many African societies, parenthood in Burundi is perceived as an honor. In addition, many mothers we spoke to, described parenthood in terms of responsibilities: “I am a mother; I am a person with responsibilities” (Joselyne Gihosha, 2015). In the families we visited, the traditional, gendered division of responsibilities between father and mother is largely left unchallenged. Mothers are generally perceived as the primary caregivers of their children and responsible for day-today care and affection. They are expected to keep an eye on the children’s whereabouts, notice changes in their health, and make sure the children learn how to behave – especially girls during adolescence. Mothers are also key to the daily organization in the household, which comprises all domestic tasks like cleaning and cooking and making sure the house is not left unguarded. This makes women reliant on the help of family, neighbors, or domestics once leaving the household is involved in other caregiving tasks, such as in interactions with school or health care. For instance, Elodie lamented that she could check on her child’s progress in school when she still had a nanny, but since the nanny was let go, must ask the father or grandfather to go to the school and report back to her (Elodie, Kamenge, 2015). Despite sharing matrimonial rights and duties in law, the financial burden largely falls upon the father, and even in couples where the mother works, it is sometimes her husband who secured her employment. Nearly all men we interviewed expressed concerns about their ability to live up to their financial responsibility, and several fathers confessed that they occasionally borrow money from friends or neighbors to meet their children’s needs. Besides this prime responsibility, fathers are also said to have other tasks, such as helping with disciplining, with homework, going to parentteacher meetings, taking the child to the hospital in case of illness, defending the child in disputes in the neighborhood, and spending time and showing affection. These tasks tend to focus on private-public interactions and are sometimes described

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in relation to stereotypical images of fathers as strong and capable and mothers as soft and emotional. For instance, Joselyne, a middle-class working woman, said: “He has to complete me. You know us women we are weak to our children. For instance, if my daughter makes a mistake, he can intervene with his hoarse voice” (Joselyne, Gihosha, 2015). Notably, mentioned tasks and responsibilities are also ascribed to fathers who do not live with their children, although many of them might not comply, and there are no means to force them to do so. In practice, mothers are important contributors to the family income as well. In several families we visited, the mother’s income is seen as an extra, allowing the child to go to a better school or as enabling the family to live in a bigger house or behind safe walls. Having two incomes is also mentioned as a safety net, in view of the generally precarious employment outlooks. At the same time, particularly single mothers mentioned that they struggled to balance time for income generating activities and childcare. For instance, Josiane sells peanuts at the local market 3 days a week and is home most of the time on the other days. Despite her efforts to balance the diverse responsibilities, she resignedly expressed hope that God will add what she cannot take care of: “I do all I can, and the rest God will do in my place. So, God will complete me” (Josiane, Kamenge, 2015).

Parenting in Poverty Parenting is adjusted to the age and gender of the child. Roughly speaking, research participants differentiated four life stages in childhood, which correspond roughly with the age categories 0–2, 3–5, 6–13 and 14+ years. These stages are defined by children’s ability to learn, the responsibilities they assume in the household, the extent to which they respect societal norms, and by sexual maturation and schooling (see Table 1). In the first years, parenting focuses on satisfying the child’s needs to the best of the parents’ abilities. Breastfeeding plays an important role: “When we teach the child to drink from the breast or when we wash it, it is a way of giving love to the child” (group discussion, Cibitoke, 2014). Mothers also emphasized the need to stay close to their children and show affection. For instance, whenever Joselyne’s daughter cries while with the nanny, she takes her in her own arms, “to prevent the girl from feeling ‘abandoned’” (Joselyne, Gihosha, 2015). The first years of childhood are seen as potentially very demanding as well, mainly because of the health risks and high costs for additional food or health care. For instance, when we asked Bertha to reflect on the first months of her motherhood, she offered: “It was not bad because he did not get ill a lot” (Bertha, Kamenge, 2015). The second life stage, when children are three, four, sometimes five, presents a continuation of the first in many ways, with parental emphasis on physical needs and affection. Nonetheless, at the age of two, parental efforts to comfort the child slowly start to make room for some basic teachings: “For a child of two years, we start to tell him what is good and not. For instance, when a child slaps his friend, we tell him that

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Table 1 Life stage characteristics and parenting practices Life stage Early years

Age category 0–2

Child activities Sleep, eat, seek comfort

Child characteristics Too small to understand things, needs constant attention

3–5

Affection, play

Basic teachings possible, child imitates

Primary school age

5–13

Schooling, show respect, help parents,

Adolescence

13+

Assume more responsibilities around the house, secondary education, or work

Learning capacity evolves, starts to explore world outside the home, vocalizes needs, sometime naughty Gender differences important, character and education show/ pay off

Adult child

18 or 20+

Run household in absence parents, financial independence, develop own projects, university

Responsible, respectful, independent, can take care of self and younger children

Parenting practices Closeness and affection to build attachment relation and confidence Implicit teaching techniques, telling repeatedly, slapping Monitoring, helping with homework, introduction of house rules, corporal punishment and threats, peer-to-peer teaching Restrictions on movement, staying close, communication, giving good example, showing implications, instill fear for boys/friends to inculcate good behavior Intergenerational dialogue

it is not good, and the child will learn many things starting from there” (Group discussion, Cibitoke, 2014). Notably, the second life stage category also comes with lessons about learning to accept the (harsh) living circumstances. For instance, Viola explained that she cannot give all her children the milk they require for their growth and thus she, although with pain in her heart, asks her eldest children to settle for tea (Viola, Ngagara, 2015). Similarly, Josiane, despite all three of her children being hungry, expected her three- and five-year-olds to come to grips with their want for food, while her two-year-old was given an extra helping of food in the period of weaning: When we visit Josiane, her three children are with her in the open courtyard. When her youngest daughter gets angry because her mother denies her the breast, Josiane gives her a plate of rice and beans. Her brother, only a year older, then starts to cry. He also wants some. But Josiane ignores him. When he tries to take some of his sister’s rice, his mother gives him a slap. Then the older sister comes over and quickly steals some food from her sister’s plate and runs off. When she comes back, her mother gives her a slap too. (Josiane, Kamenge, 2015)

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In Bujumbura, parents start to invest in their children’s (pre-school) education from the age of three, while in other parts of the country, children tend to be slightly older. For many parents, schooling is of primary concern. As Clovis mentioned: “I hope for a good education, that they will do they studies up till their doctorate, I will soon start to prepare myself. It is one of my main preoccupations” (Clovis, Kamenge, 2015). Schooling is considered important particularly because it may help prevent a life in poverty (see also, Sommers and Uvin, 2011; Berckmoes, 2015). Although employment outlooks in Burundi are bleak also with an education, education is seen as a minimum for chances at prosperity (Berckmoes, 2014). Parents we spoke to tended to formulate their hopes for their children’s future in reference to their own deprivations or the ill fate of people around. In this regard, Clovis had experienced many difficulties in pursuing education during the war and was not able to go to university, while Elise mentioned: “I pray to God that he will watch my child even in my absence . . . you see people who beg along the road, I hope that it will not overcome him in his life” (Ngagara, 2015). Notably also, several parents we met did not dare project on their child’s future. With some regret, they mentioned they would feel successful once their children survived.

Parenting in Unsafe Environments Parents occasionally mentioned other people as significant for their children’s upbringing, such as neighbors, colleagues, members from the church or from the home region (upcountry). Yet, generally, the role of these actors was seen as minor. Indeed, although the dictum that it takes a village to raise a child can sometimes be heard, parents we met seemed to perceive of people outside the immediate family circle as a mixed blessing at best. Several parents described neighbors as potential threats to their children’s upbringing. Parents mentioned both war-related political divisions as well as widespread community problems as reasons to try and limit their neighbors’ influence on their children. Mother 1: “With the war there are a lot of divisions, and it is in that way that you can have people who say, that person cannot give advice to my child because he is my enemy.” Mother 2: “In the environment, for instance, we see for instance fathers who behave badly and commit adultery, and other people in the government like administrators, judges and policemen who like to take corruption and even he who has violated a small girl. I cannot accept that they give advice to my children.” (Group discussion, Cibitoke, 2014)

Furthermore, some parents feared that neighbors could take out their misgivings and jealousy on their children, possibly by poisoning them. To protect children, parents therefore taught children to avoid dangerous others, without necessarily explaining why. Some parents told us that they warn their children about accepting food from specific neighbors, keep them busy at home by letting them watch television – if they can afford one – and, with the children’s coming of age, introduce strict house rules

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such as “going home quickly after school” to limit contact with mistrusted others (Group discussion, Cibitoke, 2014). These protection efforts were partly informed by the rising political tensions in the community, in view of elections planned just following our fieldwork research, in May 2015. Almost all parents we spoke to expressed the plausibility of widespread violence then, while also expressing concern that their abilities to secure safe environments for their children would be extremely limited. Many parents simply expressed a wish to someday find a house on a plot with a fence, preferably in other, more uptown, parts of the city.

Hierarchies in Care In the aftermath of war, the low trust in other people to play a positive role for their children puts an extra heavy burden on parents and other primary caregivers. At the same, feeling overwhelmed with ascribed responsibilities that are hard to fulfill, some parents rather withdrew (partly) from what was expected of them. These parents pointed, for instance, to potential other caregivers as “actually” responsible or “more” responsible, for instance absent fathers or absent extended family members. Similarly, Matata, who fled to Uganda to escape family responsibilities, justified his actions by pointing to the governmental free education policy. Otherwise, he gestured, he would be “handcuffed”. The difficulty for parents to live up to their responsibilities in the context of poverty and hardship also promotes hierarchies in care, as we see in the example mentioned earlier where milk was given only to the youngest of three children. In addition, especially stepchildren or fostered children often face different standards of care than biological children. To give an example, to explain why his daughters are attending schools of different quality, Gabriel (Kamenge) explained that “Anne goes to an expensive school because her mother contributes for her child and from my side, I am incapable of paying alone for the expensive school for my child Lyse [Lyse is his daughter from an earlier marriage]” (Gabriel, Kamenge). In addition, notions about intergenerational exchange or reciprocity seem to play a role as well. With age, parents expect children increasingly to assume tasks and responsibilities in the running of the household and to behave in line with societal expectations. Abiding by these rules is seen as a sign of respect and affection, and part of the intergenerational contract. And while misbehaving or disobeying is considered part of normal child behavior, the following tale suggests that the right to care can be forfeited, especially for children who miss their most reliable caregivers (mothers and maternal grandmothers, and sometimes fathers): Godelieve (Kamenge, 2014) explains that her 13-year-old niece has started to live with her. When the girl lost her mother, she was initially put in the care of her maternal aunt, because the father, allegedly, continues to live ‘like a youth.’ After some time, the aunt kicked the girl out for having a boyfriend, saying that the girl is ‘married’ and should thus go to her husband. The girl went to live with her grandmother for a while, but soon the grandmother

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suspected the girl of having stolen a necklace and did not want to see her anymore. In the end, Godelieve decided to take her in, commenting that “the behavior of the girl was not good, but she is a child, you can forgive her.” Godelieve adds to her story that she is a double orphan and therefore knows what it is to be left to fend for yourself.

Parenting for Futures In most interviews and conversations, parents referred to tradition and custom to explain their ideal parenting goals and to identify the points at which they felt they lacked and needed to adapt. Nonetheless, a few parents also identified ways in which they wanted to do things different from the past, especially to pursue better futures. To face the economic hardship that marks contemporary life in Burundi, some parents want to teach their children to be creative. Clovis, for instance, suggested that he would not adopt the traditional, authoritarian parenting style common in past and present Burundian society, but instead aimed to stimulate resourcefulness he believed is needed to thrive: Another thing is to teach them ways in which they will manage to make do in all situations. . .Most parents want to show their authority, and the children will always stay dependent on their parents. I will make sure my children will be creative . . . When I see that a child has a gift, I will help him or her develop it. (Clovis, Kamenge, 2015).

Similarly, some parents mentioned explicit efforts to prepare their children for eventual war. The many mass violent events that make up Burundi’s troubled past, and the ongoing political tensions, make parents concerned that violence can happen again. For instance, while the gradual increase in children’s share in household tasks is part of ordinary parenting to prepare children for adult life, some parents described it as a way to ensure that children become autonomous from an early age. For instance, Joselyne, reflecting on her coming of age during the civil war and the lessons she drew from that, said: Well, the war is the war, we had to learn to do all by ourselves without expecting help, that also has affected us. (. . .) It is better to render your child autonomous from an early age than by the force of war. You don’t want a child to know how to make an omelet or tea by the force of war. Better to let the child learn this in time. (Joselyne, Gihosha, 2015)

Notably, few parents wanted to talk about their own war-time experiences with their children, and many expressed unease to talk about the violent history in general. Their unease may partly reflect the many uncertainties about what has happened in the past, as well as the young age of the children of the parents in our sample, as some parents said they would tell their children at a later stage. For instance, when we asked a young mother if she would also tell her children their ethnic identity, like her parents had told her, she replied: Tell my children their ethnicity, no, I will only talk about the different ethnic groups that we have in our country and they will find out theirs once they become adults. (. . .) I will tell the history (. . .), the little that I know because other parts remain hidden or opaque. (Young mother, Cibitoke, 2015)

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In addition, many parents seemed hesitant to discuss the past because they hoped to contribute to a more peaceful future, for instance by allowing their children to forget about the ethnic cleavages along which much violence has occurred. The mother quoted just now added: “. . .and I will also give them the liberty to live with who they want to live and not how my parents did that for me.”

Concluding Remarks: Parenting in the Aftermath of War In this chapter, I reflected on parenting goals and practices in the aftermath of the civil war in Burundi. The aim was to explore how experiences with conflict affect parenting goals and practices. Among the urban poor and middle class on Bujumbura’s northern periphery, people experienced many changes in family and parenting in the aftermath of the war. For the most part, the changes were perceived as adaptations to ongoing crises and deviating from the family and parenting ideals, which remain strongly rooted in pre-colonial, rural Burundi. Many of the adaptations reflect the economic hardship that people struggle with. While poverty can be partly attributed to past conflict, as households affected by violence are more likely to remain trapped in poverty after war (Mercier et al., 2020), similar struggles and adaptions may be shared by parents in low- and middle-income countries not affected by conflict. Burundian parents, families and communities are also deeply affected by tensions and mistrust – between men and women, neighbors, and among family members. The tensions attest to the torn social fabric in the aftermath of the civil war and have resulted in very small circles of trusted kin and caregivers. With the difficulties of parents to meet care responsibilities, however, this means that children can draw support from a small number of people. And children who miss their most reliant caregiver – their mother – may fail to meet the strict conditions sometimes put to their care. In Burundi, for children from the age of three, these parenting adaptations entail that they are expected to learn to settle for less than their needs and to become independent from an early age. To summarize the interaction between conflict and parenting in Burundi: if, as Levine argues, “environmental pressures from a more recent past [are] encoded in customs . . .” (Levine, 1974, p 226.), then past conflict in Burundi has become encoded in contemporary parenting practices, but less in parenting goals. The adaptations to conflict resonate strongest in the voids in parental care, but much to the parents’ unease. Acknowledgments Fieldwork for this study was conducted with funding from the Netherlands Ministry of Foreign Affairs, through the UNICEF Peacebuilding, Education and Advocacy program in Burundi (2013–2016), and analysis and writing were done at the University of Amsterdam (2014–2016) and the African Studies Centre Leiden (2021). I would like to express special thanks to my research assistant Aline Ndayisasiriye, who did a wonderful job during the fieldwork for this study in 2014 and 2015. I also express thanks to Prof. dr. Ria Reis who provided feedback on an early draft of this chapter.

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References Albert, E. M. (1964). Rhetoric, logic and poetics in Burundi: Culture patterning of speech behavior, American Anthropologist, 66 (6) Part 2, The Ethnography of Communication, 35–54. Berckmoes, L.H. (2014). Elusive tactics: Urban youth navigating the aftermath of war in Burundi. Unpublished PhD thesis. Amsterdam: VU University Amsterdam. Berckmoes, L. H. (2015). Youth, politics and violence in Burundi: Gullible followers or tactic actors? In F. Reyntjens, S. Vandeginste, & M. Verpoorten (Eds.), L'Afrique des Grands Lacs: Annuaire 2014–2015 (pp. 21–38). University of Antwerp Press. Berckmoes, L. H., & White, B. (2014). Youth, farming and precarity in rural Burundi. European Journal of Development Research, 26. https://doi.org/10.1057/ejdr.2013.53 Berckmoes, L. H., Jong, J. T. V. M., & Reis, R. (2017). Intergenerational transmission of violence and resilience in conflict-affected Burundi: A qualitative study of why some children thrive despite duress, Global Mental Health, 4. https://doi.org/10.1017/gmh.2017.23. Charak, R., Jong, J.T.V.M., Berckmoes, L.H., Ndayisaba, H., & Reis, R. (2021). Intergenerational maltreatment in parent–child dyads from Burundi, Africa: Associations among parental depression and connectedness, posttraumatic stress symptoms, and aggression in children, Journal of Traumatic Stress, 34. https://doi.org/10.1002/jts.22735. Courtois, A. C. (2016). Les femmes chefs de ménage à Bujumubra : marginalité, violences et résilience, Unpublished PhD thesis. Pau: Université de Pau et des Pays de l’Adour. Dickerman, C. W. (1984). Economic and social change in an African city: Bujumbura, Burundi, 1960–1962. Unpublished PhD thesis. Wisconsin: University of Wisconsin-Madison. Giani, M., Mercier, M., Munoz-Mora, J. C., Ngezebuke, R. L., & Verwimp, P. (2015). Results for the parental care (CARENT) survey in Burundi. Université Libre de Bruxelles. Hendriks, T., Reis, R., Sostakova, M., & Berckmoes, L. H. (2019). Violence and vulnerability: Children’s strategies and the logic of violence in Burundi. Children & Society, 34. https://doi. org/10.1111/chso.12349 Levine, R. (1974). Parental goals: A cross-cultural view. Teachers College Record, 76(2), 226–239. Levine, R. A. (2010). Childhood socialization: Comparative studies of childhood socialization. University of Hong Kong Faculty of Education. Levine, R. A., Dixon, S., LeVine, S., Richman, A., Keefer, C. H., Herbert Leiderman, P., & Brazelton, T. B. (1994). Child care and culture: Lessons from Africa. Cambridge University Press. Manirakiza, Z. (1994). Guerre et paix dans le Burundi traditionnel : Une étude anthropologique et sémiotique de la poésie guerrière. In J. Gahama & C. Thibon (Eds.), Les régions orientales du Burundi : Une périphérie à l’épreuve du développement (pp. 193–210). Éditions Karthala. Mead, M. (1928). Coming of age in Samoa. William Morrow. Mercier, M., Ngezebuke, R. L., & Verwimp, P. (2020). Violence exposure and poverty: Evidence from the Burundi civil war. Journal of Comparative Economics, 48, 822–840. Muntunutwiwe, J. S. (2013). La mobilisation politique des jeunes au Burundi à travers les élections démocratiques de 2010. The East Africa Review, 46(2), 115–133. Ndayikuriye, S. (1997). Histoire de l’urbanisation de Bujumbura: Migrations et exode rural entre 1950 et 1973, in, Ntabona, A. (ed.) Au coeur de l’Afrique, Le centenaire de la ville de Bujumbura, 4, 495–522. Ntampaka, C. (1997). Burundi: Reconciling the sources of law in the Burundi code of persons and of the family. The International Survey of Family Law, 65–77. Ruzibiza, Y. (2020). ‘They are a shame to the community. . .’ stigma, school attendance, solitude and resilience among pregnant teenagers and teenage mothers in Mahama refugee camp, Rwanda. Global Public Health, 16(5), 763–774. https://doi.org/10.1080/17441692.2020. 1751230 Sommers, M., & Uvin, P. (2011). Youth in Rwanda and Burundi: Contrasting visions (Special report). United State Institute of Peace. Whiting, B., & Whiting, J. W. M. (1975). Children of six cultures: A psycho-cultural analysis. Harvard University Press.

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Lidewyde H. Berckmoes is associate professor at the African Studies Centre Leiden. In her research, she employs life-course and intergenerational perspectives to advance the understandings of regional and cyclical conflict dynamics in Africa. In recent projects focus was on the transgenerational effects of mass violence on children and youth in the Great Lakes region, particularly on Burundi and Rwanda. Trained as social and cultural anthropologist, she enjoys working in multidisciplinary research collaborations to help illuminate the multifaceted ways in which conflict affects world views and practices.

Parenting in Turkey M. Selenga Gürmen and Sude Kılıç

In the human development process, culture and surrounding social context play a crucial role. Continuous socialization processes shape who we are and how we relate to each other (Bronfenbrenner, 1979). In his model of Bioecological Theory of Development, Bronfenbrenner explains how the individual is influenced and shaped by the interaction that she experiences with surrounding spheres of environment that include but are not limited to her immediate and extended family. These include institutions like school, the larger community, and the surrounding sociopolitical environment and culture. The surrounding social and cultural contexts shape and determine the unique and/or shared experiences that individuals have. Therefore, human behaviors might have different meanings in different cultural and social contexts (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007). Families also undergo a developmental process that involves socialization from surrounding cultural and social environments (Carter & McGoldrick, 2005). According to Family Systems Theory (Minuchin, 1974), family members affect and are affected by each other, and surrounding systems such as extended family, various institutions, community, and cultural context affect how family members interact. Families as a system have different subsystems (spousal, co-parental, sibling, parent-child, etc.) that also affect and are affected by each other. Therefore, any unique experience and change in one family member or dyad might have an impact on all other members and systems (Minuchin, 1974). In family development, there are different family life cycle stages (Carter & McGoldrick, 2005). Those stages are distinct from each other qualitatively and each stage is marked with different family tasks and adaptations. For instance, in the first family life cycle stage, an individual is expected to form an independent identity that differentiates himself/herself from his/her family of origin. The person

M. S. Gürmen (*) · S. Kılıç Özyeğin Üniversity, Istanbul, Turkey e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_16

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should be able to support himself/herself financially and form meaningful long-term friendships or romantic relationships. The second family life cycle stage happens when the individual decides to form a committed union, usually via marriage. This stage requires forming new rules and family life norms as well as regulated and restructured relationships with one’s family of origins. In the next family life cycle, the biggest challenge is to welcome a new identity: being a parent. This identity lives through and undergoes continuous change and adaptation through the following family life cycles: families with adolescence, launching children, and families in later life and grandparenting. The role of culture in the development of families becomes more salient when values around interactions such as romantic relationships, parenting, or grandparenting create a social script for individuals to follow (Baldwin, 1992). Certain behaviors or scripts might be more acceptable in some cultures and very unusual or inappropriate in others. For instance, dating before marriage is expected and considered healthy in some cultures, while some other cultures consider this inappropriate and immoral and encourage arranged marriages or dating with only marital intentions. Disciplining and/or showing affection to one’s children are also culture-specific behaviors. Although the literature suggests some universal principles or best parenting practices for healthy child outcomes, “the effect of the parenting behaviours may depend on the context in which it is used” (Aytaç et al., 2019).

The Cultural and Social Context of Turkey In order to understand the complexity of the Turkish cultural context, one should look at its geography. It is located at the intersection of the continents of Asia, Africa, and Europe. It is often seen as a “bridge” between Asia and Europe, the East and the West, and that notion is reflected in the cultural context as well. Turkey is seen as “in-between: between East and West, between the modern and the traditional, and between numerous other variations of that binarism” (Rahimi, 2015). The Turkish Republic was founded in 1923, overthrowing the 600-year Ottoman dynasty and empire. The Islamic caliphate and law were abolished, and a secular nation-state was introduced. A great transformation from a traditional, rural, patriarchal society to a modern, urban, industrialized society began (Georgas et al., 2006). Turkey’s economic, social, political, and linguistic reforms led to rapid westernization and industrialization. Throughout history, Anatolian lands have hosted many different civilizations and cultures. In terms of current social structure, 99% of the Turkish nation are Muslims, and the remaining consists of different religious beliefs, mainly Jews and Christian groups (Armenians, Syriacs, Greeks) (Eurydice, 2021). Currently, there are many different ethnicities and cultural groups. The majority are Turkish (72.4%) followed by Kurds, Zaza Kurds, Circassians, Bosniaks, Georgians, Albanians, Arabs, and others (World Population Review, 2021). In recent years, there has been a significant influx of Syrian refugees. According to UN Refugee Agency Turkey Fact sheet

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(2020), there are 3.6 million Syrian people in Turkey, the world’s largest refugee population. The ethno-cultural diversity enriches the social and cultural context and further contributes to the “in-between” characteristics of Turkey (Kuzulugil, 2010). Turkey is considered as a developing country (United Nations, 2021) and it has had rapid industrialization and urbanization in recent years. According to TUIK (2020), between 2014 and 2020, the service sector led the economy, followed by industry and agriculture. In the last decade, the Turkish economy has started to experience difficulties. Between 2013–2020, Turkey’s Gross Domestic Products (GDP) rates decreased dramatically. In 2014, 9.2% of the population were unemployed, and this ratio enlarged to 12 in 2021 (TUIK, 2021a). The COVID-19 pandemic had a significant impact on the Turkish economy, and it is expected that it will be a slow recovery with the significant depreciation of Turkish lira in the last year (OECD, 2021a, b).

Gender Equality and Family Structure After the establishment of the Republic, women were given voting and election rights in 1934. Many reforms were made to increase the inclusion of women in all parts of the social and economic system. Women were encouraged to join the labor force. According to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) report in 2014, Turkey is halfway, compared to other European and OECD countries, regarding women employment rates. This is an increasing trend, and many more women are working informally and unofficially. The employment rate of women in Turkey was 25.3% in 2002 and 28.2% in 2021 (TUIK, 2021b). In 2002, most women worked in agriculture (60%), which changed into the service sector (57.9%) in 2018 (Serel & Özdemir, 2017; TÜİK, 2021b). In 2016, 70,7% of women indicated that being busy with housework was a reason to not participate in the labor force (Turkish Ministry of Family and Social Services, 2019). Moreover, according to statistics from 2016, attitudes towards women in the workplace show different percentages between the regions. Southeast Anatolia indicated the highest rate for saying no to women in the workplace (28.5%), and the Aegean region has the highest rate for yes (90.6%). Education, marriage, economic and social factors influence women’s employment status. (Turkish Ministry of Family and Social Services, 2019). In terms of wage gap, there was a 10% gender pay gap between men and women (OECD, 2021a, b). As women in Turkey gain more economic independence and move away from the traditional caregiver role, the family structure is changing. This is mostly reflected in the increasing rates of divorce and separation, with an increase from 8.3% to 17.7% in 40 years (Turgut & Feyzioğlu, 2014). Economic independence empowers women to end dysfunctional and/or abusive marriages when they want to. The report by the Ministry of Family and Social Policies (Turgut & Feyzioğlu, 2014) also revealed an increase in nuclear families and a decrease in the extended family structure. The number of children has decreased in the last 10 years. In the

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1970s, the average number of children per woman was five, and this number became 2.4 in the 2000s (Turgut & Feyzioğlu, 2014). In terms of childcare, there has been a slight change in parenting roles between 2006 and 2011, but mothers are still the main caregivers of young children in both urban and rural areas. Meanwhile, grandparents have become more active in childrearing as women enter the labor force (Tezel Şahin & Şahin, 2020). Although extended family households decreased, grandparents still play an active role in family structure, especially among dualworker families.

Parenting Values and Practices Turkey’s “in-between” culture is also reflected in family life and parenting practices. The Model of Family Change (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007) describes two main family prototypes: model of independence and model of interdependence. The first family model is characterized by the need and practice of independence between family members. This prototype is more common among developed and highly urbanized, industrialized cultures. In less developed, rural settings in which culture of relatedness (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007) is more emphasized, the family model of interdependence, the material and emotional interdependencies between family members, is more common. Turkey, with its ongoing social change and urbanization, falls in between those two prototypes and creates a third one: family model of psychological (emotional) interdependencies (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007). The family model of psychological interdependency and the social change that Turkey has undergone is reflected in Value of Children (VOC) studies conducted in 1970 and 2002. VOC is a multi-national study with data collected from parents regarding their motivations and expectations as parents and values that they attribute to their children (Kağıtçıbaşı & Ataca, 2015). In the 1970 study, in rural settings, the expectation from children to provide material and financial support was highlighted. As socioeconomic status increased, there was less emphasis on the economic value of children. Rather, more psychological/emotional values were attributed to children, such as having them as companions, and feeling pride and joy for being parents. In the 2002 VOC study, the social change was reflected in more emphasis on psychological/emotional value and less emphasis on their material/economic values (Ataca, 2006). The psychological/emotional value is prevalent in all family relationships in Turkey (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007). Although the general structure of Turkish families is nuclear, the extended family -mainly grandparents- is also prevalent. Emotional closeness is an important family value both in nuclear and extended families. Therefore, Kağıtçıbaşı (1996) describes Turkish families as “structurally nuclear yet functionally extended”. The notion of function has a more emotional role than an instrumental one. With grandparents, the emotional or expressive role includes providing emotional support, passing on traditions, and being family mediators and arbitrators in family crises (Ataca, 2009). Support from grandparents, especially

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grandmothers, is linked with better parenting behaviors for mothers (Baydar et al., 2012).

Motherhood vs. Fatherhood Traditionally, fathers are seen as authority figures in Turkish families (Metindoğan, 2015). They are responsible for earning money, handling financial matters, and running errands outside of the house such as shopping. They tend to make decisions or at least they have the final say in the family. This view has changed in recent years with social and economic transformations, especially with women’s participation in the labor force (Boratav et al., 2014). Yet, patriarchal norms and values in childcare and parenting practices are still present. For instance, a recent nation-wide study by the Mother Child Education Foundation (Akçınar, 2017) showed that the majority of fathers (more than 90%) think that mothers are the primary caregivers of children between the ages of 0–10. Very few engage in the physical care of infants and toddlers (feeding, cleaning, changing diapers, etc.). The view that fathers are “the head of the house” is strong especially in lower socioeconomic families or those living in rural areas (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007, Bozok, 2018). The social transformation of recent decades has led to some change in the views of fathers that live in urban and higher SES families. In higher SES contexts, fathers tend to have more egalitarian values around household chores and childcare, want to have more close relationships with their children, and be more eager to change their parenting and spousal practices (Bozok, 2018, Tol & Taşkan, 2018). The change, however, is full of contradictions and many fathers experience the dilemma between the traditional disciplinarian father role and contemporary affectionate, nurturing father role (Boratav et al., 2014). The studies (Bozok, 2018; Tol & Taşkan, 2018) also reflect on the potential challenges and obstacles for fathers to participate in parenting. Gender stereotypes are the most salient and strong ones. Women also expect men to be “the head of the family” and perpetuate sexism while raising their sons to become tough and their daughters to be submissive to their fathers, brothers, and future husbands. This is reflected in maternal gatekeeping behaviors that further hinder fathers’ involvement in childcare activities (Pekel-Uludağlı, 2019). Gender stereotypes and sexism around childcare is present in the workplace. Fathers get only a few days – if any- paid paternal leave (Tol & Taşkan, 2018).

Parenting Practices The unique “in-between” culture of Turkey reflects itself in parenting practices. In Western cultures, there is a clear distinction between parental warmth and control. Parental control and harsh disciplining are found to be associated with adverse child

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outcomes and are perceived to be negative and wrong. In Turkey, though, authoritarian parenting is not necessarily perceived as a sign of rejection by parents. Especially when it is accompanied by parental acceptance, the detrimental effects of corporal punishment or harsh disciplining has been alleviated (Erkman & Rohner, 2006). The emotional interdependency model of Kağıtçıbaşı (2007) suggests that Turkish families are emotionally bonded to each other, and emotional expression is often valued in child-rearing practices. Fathers usually take on disciplinarian role in Turkish families (Metindoğan, 2015), yet, both mothers and fathers share positive emotions and encourage expression of negative emotions (Çorapçı, 2012). Mothers are usually more affectionate toward their children, yet parents usually accompany each other in the parenting styles (Gözü, 2019). The socioeconomic status of families seems to play a role in parenting practices. Punishment-based disciplining is more common among low SES families. While punishment and harsh disciplining is perceived to be a protective factor in dangerous neighborhoods and delinquency, corporal punishment and perceived parental rejection are still linked with adverse child outcomes and development (Altan-Aytun et al., 2013). On the other hand, parents in high SES families use verbal explanations and reasoning to decrease undesired behaviors (Kırcaali-İftar, 2005). Mothers in high SES families are more emotionally available and responsive toward their children.

Turkish Parenting Studies in Different Developmental Stages Based on the family life cycle approach (Carter & McGoldrick, 2005), the parenting needs and behaviors may change according to children’s developmental stages.

Parenting in Early Childhood In Turkey, mothers are seen as the primary caregivers. They tend to meet the physical and socioemotional needs of their children and spend more time with them in their early developmental stages (Baydar et al., 2010). Fathers are usually responsible for meeting financial needs and decision-making (İzci & Jones, 2021). Also, Turkish fathers usually engage in play activities with infants and toddlers (İvrendi & Işıkoğlu, 2010). Although mothers are the primary caregivers, they usually receive significant amounts of social support from their social circles (Baydar et al., 2010). Mothers reported that most support come from their partners and families followed by neighbors and friends. The study also showed that mothers who live in rural areas get more support from their community, and mothers in urban districts get more help

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from their friends (Baydar et al., 2010). Fathers also seem to perceive themselves as “helpers” to mothers (Akçınar, 2017). In terms of parenting behaviors, most parents reported a democratic attitude towards their children (Uygun & Kozikoğlu, 2020; Alabay, 2017; Saltalı & Arslan, 2012). It is followed by overprotective, permissive, and authoritarian attitudes, respectively (Uygun & Kozikoğlu, 2020). Sak et al. (2015) indicated that mothers showed a more democratic attitude compared to fathers. Different studies showed that increasing the number of children negatively affects democratic attitudes (Kızıltepe et al., 2013; Saltalı and Arslan, 2012). Socio-economic status (SES) plays a significant role in parents’ attitudes (Alabay, 2017). According to Aydoğdu and Dilekmen (2016), more overprotective attitudes were observed in low SES families. Higher SES positively correlates with a democratic attitude and negatively correlates with an authoritarian attitude (Uygun & Kozikoğlu, 2020). Similarly, studies found a positive correlation between parents’ education level and democratic attitude (Aydoğdu & Dilekmen, 2016). Alabay (2017) also indicated that parents who have postgraduate degrees show less overprotective attitudes than parents who have primary school graduates towards their toddlers.

Parenting in School-Age There are fewer studies concerning parenting school-age children (6–12 years old) in Turkey compared to other developmental stages. Usually, the preschool years are more nuanced while studying the role of parenting in acquiring socialization skills, emotion regulation abilities, and self-control behaviors. The association between parenting and academic achievement or peer relationships are mostly studied during adolescence. However, middle childhood is an important developmental period that marks the transition from early childhood to adolescence. Parenting practices continue to play an important role in children’s cognitive, academic, and socioemotional development (Acar-Bayraktar et al., 2018). Recent literature highlights the importance of parent-child interactions on children’s behavioral problems during middle childhood. Acar and his colleagues (2019) found that children’s externalizing problems positively correlated with the conflictual relationship with parents and authoritarian parenting attitudes. Additionally, internalizing problems are also positively linked with authoritative parenting (Acar et al., 2019). A longitudinal study (Gülseven et al., 2017) supports the effect of parenting on children’s problem behaviors. It was found that daily parenting hassles predict aggressive behaviors of school-age children. Parents who had more daily hassles are also likely to use more physical punishment and show less warmth. Emotion regulation and emotion socialization are other important developmental constructs related with parenting behaviors. Parents’ supportive emotion socialization behaviors mediate the association between positive parenting behaviors and children’s prosocial behaviors (Acar-Bayraktar et al., 2018). The opposite seems to

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be true. Children’s emotion regulation difficulties are predicted by harsh parental disciplining (Gülseven et al., 2018). Further, harsh parenting practices seemed to predict emotion lability of children 2 years later (Gülseven et al., 2018). During middle childhood years, parents play a vital mediating and/or moderating role in children’s relationships with others (school, peers, siblings). School and academic achievement seems to be an important topic of interest in parent-child interactions. A study with Turkish and Dutch families (Aslan & Cansever, 2007) showed that Turkish parents talk more about homework (26.3%) and classes (25%) than social activities (7.5%). On the other hand, in Dutch families, most parents talk about social activities (64.4%), and only 15.6% talk about school. Parental involvement in school activities is also important for Turkish families. Families usually trust school administrations and are encouraged by the school managers and teachers to participate in school activities (Beycioğlu et al., 2013; Sabancı, 2009). Parent-child relationships seem to influence children’s social relationships. The conflict between parent and the child was negatively associated with children’s peer relations in school (Acar et al., 2019). Further, children who perceive their parents to have less warmth and acceptance and less responsibility/discipline had a higher risk in becoming a bully or victim to bullying (Atik & Güneri, 2013). In addition to peer relationships, parent-child interactions might affect sibling relationships. The study with Turkish mothers and siblings revealed that maternal warmth is linked with positive sibling relationships and maternal hostility (harsh disciplining being perceived as hostile behavior) is associated with conflict between siblings (Selçuk & Aytaç, 2020).

Parenting in Adolescence Adolescence is the transition time to adulthood. Perceived democratic and tolerant parents’ attitudes significantly impact adolescents’ subjective wellbeing. In contrast, negligent and authoritative attitudes are related to low levels of subjective wellbeing. (Sarı & Özkan, 2016). Perceived parental acceptance seem to be related to better psychological adjustment in both boys and girls (Börkan et al., 2014). Parental closeness is found to indirectly decrease aggression by increasing adolescent selfcontrol behaviors (Özdemir et al., 2013). Feeling loved and accepted by their parents for adolescents seemed to be indirectly alleviating the potential negative effects of corporal punishment (Börkan et al., 2014), traumatic experiences (Vural et al., 2012) and interparental conflict (Gürmen & Rohner, 2014). Similarly, when adolescents perceive that their basic psychological needs are met by their parents, they report lower levels of anxiety and higher levels of life satisfaction, problem-solving skills, and confidence (Dost-Gözkân, 2019). Adolescents who disclose more and keep fewer secrets from their parents appeared to have the highest scores of reported life satisfaction (Elsharnouby & Dost-Gözkân, 2020). Parent-child relationships also appear to have an impact on school life and academic achievement. Authoritative parenting compared to authoritarian and

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neglectful seemed to be related to higher academic achievement (Cenk & Demir, 2016). Another study revealed that parenting styles might be related to adolescents’ learning approach in classes. Learning approach orientation is most strongly predicted by a democratic and overprotective style. Overprotective and permissive styles have a significant low-level relationship with the learning avoidance approach (Kösterelioğlu, 2018). Adolescence is also a period when youth might engage in risky behaviors or addictions. Studies show that Turkish adolescents’ smoking and internet addiction behaviors are associated with parental attitudes. (Doğan et al. 2015; Öztekin et al., 2021). Doğan et al. (2015) found a significant positive correlation between protective-demanding and authoritarian parenting and internet addiction. Similarly, the conflict between parents and adolescents is positively correlated with problematic internet use. Furthermore, Öztekin et al. (2021) studied adolescents’ smoking behavior and the impact of individual, familial and parental factors. Parents’ democratic attitude is a protective factor for adolescents’ smoking behavior; neither education nor SES had a significant impact. Significantly, the study indicated that mothers’ democratic attitude towards boys decreases their chance of starting smoking early. Authoritarian fathers’ attitudes increased the risk of smoking at least once (Öztekin et al., 2021).

Parenting in Divorce & Remarriage Divorce and remarriage are considered as alternative developmental life cycle stages in families. Divorce is considered as a transition time rather than a disruptive event for the family. The family needs to go through a series of adaptations and restructuring to redefine roles and responsibilities. In terms of parenting, co-parenting relationships, the relationship between partners in relation to the role of parenting becomes more salient with the decision of divorce. As the spousal relationship terminates, ex-partners’ major communication and decision-making practices revolve around children and child-related issues. Recent literature suggests that cooperative and effective co-parenting is crucial for children’s wellbeing and development across developmental stages. In Turkey, divorce rates have been increasing in recent years. There was a 41% (from 1.3 to 1.6) increase in crude divorce rate from 2001 to 2017 (Turkish Ministry of Family and Social Services, 2019). Although the rate decreased in the beginning of the pandemic, it had increased by July 2020. The current crude divorce rate is 1.62 (TUIK, 2021c). Although the divorce rate has been increasing, it is not clear how social norms and structure responds to this change. One study (Engin et al., 2020) found that the tolerance toward divorce has decreased and the negative stigma has appeared to continue. This interesting finding might be due to governmental policies and campaigns around the “sacred family” and “maintaining family integrity” (Engin et al., 2020).

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The majority of studies conducted in Turkey have focused on child outcomes and have not necessarily discussed how parental practices change during and after divorce. One important note to add here regards custody arrangements. The common practice is to provide sole custody to one of the parents, usually the mother. Adhering to international regulations and agreements, the law suggests that both parents are eligible for custody and the decision will be made according to “the best interest of children”. Yet, in practice, court decisions in Turkey reveal that in most cases, the mother is given sole custody and fathers receive very limited visitation rights, which is usually only one day every two weeks. The current practice in Turkey usually makes mothers take the full responsibility for their children with minimal support and guidance and leaves fathers with minimal contact with their children, making both genders suffer. The conflict around custody and visitation might result in parental alienation and intergenerational coalition. Those in turn affect children’s development negatively. The few existing studies show that single mothers experience difficulties around disciplining their children, feel the need of a “father figure”, suffer from negative societal attitudes and stereotypes, and have ongoing conflict and violence toward their ex-husbands (Kavas & Gündüz-Hoşgör, 2010, 2013; Çakır, 2010). To date, there is no published article on the experiences of divorced fathers. An unpublished masters’ thesis (Doğan, 2019) voiced the experiences of 12 noncustodial divorced fathers in their role of post-divorce parenting. The results show that the fathers are willing to bond and provide care to their children, yet the custody situations, maternal gatekeeping, and the role of being the “breadwinner” seem to create difficulties in maintaining parent-child relationships.

Summary and Conclusions Social and cultural contexts may influence human behaviors and family relationships by impacting social norms, roles, and values. The Turkish context of parenting provides a meaningful example how cultural and contextual factors shape and change parenting values and practices. Turkey, just like its geographical position, contains elements from surrounding social and cultural contexts. Turkish culture has both eastern, oriental, and western, modernized values and practices. In addition to its existing cultural complexity, Turkey has undergone several social, cultural, and political changes in the last century. The changes are reflected in the changing values, practices, and patterns of family relations and parenting. Traditionally and contemporarily, the notion of family and togetherness is highly valued. Family members are tied to one another not because of material needs and necessities but because of psychological and emotional needs (Kağıtçıbaşı, 2007). Turkish mothers and fathers generally value and show warmth and love to their children. The close relationships with children extend into adulthood. Parenting

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roles are defined in accordance with existing gender norms and values. Mothers are seen as primary caregivers, while fathers are breadwinning and disciplining their children, when necessary. As more women enter the labor force, these parenting roles and practices have started to experience some change. Father involvement has started to increase yet mothers’ defined role of being primary caregiver has not yet changed. Fathers want to participate more in the family life and parenting, yet they still stay away from physical care chores such as feeding, cleaning, and changing diapers. The discrepancy between paternal and maternal involvement is mostly present during early childhood and among families from lower socioeconomic status. One interesting finding concerns parenting styles and disciplinarian behaviors. Although the existing literature suggests that authoritarian parenting is usually related with poor child outcomes and perceived parental rejection, in Turkey, the case is different. Although studies show that democratic or authoritative parenting is associated with better child adjustment and outcomes, authoritarian parenting is not necessarily perceived as a parental rejection. Further, the effect of harsh disciplining is less detrimental when children perceive their parents to be accepting (Erkman & Rohner, 2006). One less discussed issue in this chapter is interparental relationships. There are fewer studies that concern co-parenting relationships among Turkish families. Future studies should explore how parents relate to one another in the role of parenting and how interparental interactions affect parent-child relationships and child outcomes. Further, there are almost no published studies that explore the experiences of divorced parents. The Turkish literature on parenting and parentchild interactions is in need of more studies on these matters.

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OECD. (2021a). Gender wage gap (indicator). doi: https://doi.org/10.1787/7cee77aa-en (Accessed on 26 December 2021). OECD. (2021b). Economic surveys: Turkey 2021. OECD Economic Surveys: Turkey. https://doi. org/10.1787/19990480. Özdemir, Y., Vazsonyi, A. T., & Çok, F. (2013). Parenting processes and aggression: The role of self-control among Turkish adolescents. Journal of Adolescence, 36(1), 65–77. https://doi.org/ 10.1016/j.adolescence.2012.09.004 Oztekin, C., Batra, M., Abdelsalam, S., Sengezer, T., Ozkara, A., & Erbas, B. (2021). Impact of individual, familial and parental factors on adolescent smoking in Turkey. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 18(7), 3740–3752. Pekel-Uludağlı, N. (2019). Are uninvolved fathers really incompetent and unsatisfied? Testing the mediator role of father involvement from fathers’ perspectives. European Journal of Developmental Psychology, 16(5), 538–551. https://doi.org/10.1080/17405629.2018.1472077 Rahimi, S. (2015). Power, self, and psychosis: Examining political subjectivity through schizophrenia. Psychotherapy and Politics International, 13(1), 30–42. https://doi.org/10.1002/ppi. 1343 Sabancı, A. (2009). Views of primary school administrators, teachers and parents on parental involvement in Turkey. Eurasian Journal of Educational Research, 36, 245–262. Sak, R., Sak, İ. T. Ş., Atli, S., & ŞAHİN, B. K. (2015). Okul öncesi dönem: Anne baba tutumları. Mersin University Journal of the Faculty of Education, 11(3), 972–991. Saltalı, N. D., & Arslan, E. (2012). Parent’s attitudes as a predictor of preschoolers’ social competence and introverted behavior. Elementary Education Online, 11(3), 729–737. Sarı, T., & Özkan, İ. (2016). Ergenlerin öznel iyi oluşları ile algıladıkları anne baba tutumları arasındaki ilişkinin incelenmesi. Düşünen Adam: The Journal of Psychiatry and Neurological Science, 29(2), 155–162. Selçuk, Ş., & Aytaç, B. (2020). Congruence between sibling relationship and parenting practices across older and younger siblings. Nesne Psikoloji Dergisi, 8(16), 16–30. https://doi.org/10. 7816/nesne-08-16-02 Serel, H., & Özdemir, B. S. (2017). Türkİye’de kadın İstİhdami ve ekonomİk büyüme İlİşkİsİ. Yönetim ve Ekonomi Araştırmaları Dergisi, 134–150. https://doi.org/10.11611/yead.310569 Tezel Şahin, F., & Şahin, B. K. (2020). Turkish grandmothers’ experiences of caring for their grandchildren: A qualitative study. Early Child Development and Care, 190(3), 284–295. The UN Refugee Agency. (2020). Turkey Fack sheet [Fact sheet]. https://www.unhcr.org/tr/wpcontent/uploads/sites/14/2020/10/UNHCR-Turkey-General-Fact-Sheet-September-2020FINAL330.pdf Tol, U. U., & Taşkan, D. (2018). Erkeklik ve Babalık Halleri. AÇEV Yayınları. Turgut, M., & Feyzioğlu, S. (2014). Türkiye Aile Yapısı Araştırması: Tespitler, öneriler. T.C.Aile ve Sosyal Politikalar Bakanlığı. Turkish Ministry of Family and Social Policies. (2019). Türkiye Aile Yapısı İleri İstatistik Analizi, 2018. Ankara. Retrieved: https://www.aile.gov.tr/media/35869/taya-18_turkce_kitap.pdf Türkiye İstatistik Kurumu (TUIK). (2020). İstihdam edilenlerin yıllar ve cinsiyete göre iktisadi faaliyet kolları. Retrieved from https://data.tuik.gov.tr/Bulten/Index?p=Isgucu-Istatistikleri2019-33784 Türkiye İstatistik Kurumu (TUIK). (2021a). Mevsim etkisinden arındırılmış temel işgücü göstergeleri. Retrieved from https://data.tuik.gov.tr/Bulten/Index?p=Isgucu-IstatistikleriOcak-2021-37486 Türkiye İstatistik Kurumu (TUIK). (2021b). İstatistiklerle kadın, 2020. Retrieved from https://data. tuik.gov.tr/Bulten/GetBultenPdf?id=37221 Türkiye İstatistik Kurumu (TUIK). (2021c). Number of marriages, crude marriage rate, number of divorces and crude divorce rate, 2001–2020. https://data.tuik.gov.tr/Bulten/Index?p=Marriageand-Divorce-Statistics-2020-37211&dil=2

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M. Selenga Gürmen graduated summa cum laude from Bogazici University with a BA in Psychology in 2010. She obtained her Masters and PhD in in Marriage and Family Therapy from the University of Connecticut in 2012 and 2015. Currently, she is an assistant professor in the Psychology department at Özyegin University, Istanbul, Turkey. Her research on Marriage and Family Therapy focuses mostly on issues around co-parenting, divorce, and high-conflict therapy. Dr. Gürmen conducts therapy with individuals, couples, and families. She provides various seminars, workshops, and training programs where she supports couples and parents during times of crisis and developmental transition processes. Sude Kılıç graduated from Özyeğin University, Turkey with a B.A. in psychology and received her clinical psychology M.S. at Notre Dame de Namur University, CA, USA. Her research focused on the relationship between perceived stress and psychological wellbeing, examining the moderating effects of yoga and self-compassion. Her specialization focused on trauma/collective traumas.

Fluid Families and Harshness as Adaptation in Haitian Childcare: An Approach to Improving Life Outcomes for Haitian Children Kate Schuenke-Lucien, Abigail Mills, and Bryanna Beamer

Childcare decisions made by biological parents and extended families in Haiti must be understood in the context of Haiti’s uniquely complicated and tumultuous history and modern-day conditions of extreme deprivation. In the past several decades, Haiti has made news headlines for wretched reasons: shattering earthquakes, ferocious hurricanes, debilitating economic conditions forcing mass migration, and the assassination of a president. In all realms of life, Haitians have had to survive in the midst of constant “acute on chronic” (Farmer et al., 2011, p. 208) crises, finding a way to manage their daily lives during both long simmering difficulties and eruptions of chaos. Although the context for survival is challenging in Haiti, children and families continue inventing and reinventing themselves to adapt to their realities. Haitian parenting and child care choices are fundamentally shaped by the culturally and historically conditioned norm of fluid family structures and the use of harsher approaches – though not abusive – in childcare as necessary adaptations to harsh living conditions. We argue that Haitian parenting, although qualitatively different from accepted normative parenting approaches in Western industrialized democracies, has in many ways evolved in ingenious and exceptional ways to protect children in a climate that is harshly unfavorable to positive outcomes for children, regardless of the parenting approaches employed. Our argument and analysis of parenting excludes extreme abusive parenting and mistreatment that is often promoted by alcoholism or mental health problems. Rather, our focus is on normative and typical Haitian parenting. For those concerned with improving outcomes for Haitian children and families, we hope to provide a deeper and more nuanced understanding of how and why Haitian parenting and childcare practices are as they are. This culturally and historically grounded knowledge should advance two goals for those desiring to support K. Schuenke-Lucien (*) · A. Mills · B. Beamer Global Center for the Development of the Whole Child, University of Notre Dame, Notre Dame, IN, USA e-mail: [email protected]; [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_17

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Haitian parents and caregivers. First it highlights unique assets in extended and fluid family structures in Haiti that can be leveraged and second, it clarifies ways in which understanding the context and environment in which caregivers make decisions about discipline is needed to diminish violence against Haitian children.

Historical Context and Physical Conditions That Shape Haitian Parenting and Childcare Choices Since its unconventional inception as the result of the first and only successful slave rebellion to lead to the creation of an independent nation, the Haitian government has struggled to provide even the most basic services to its population (Dubois, 2012). Over two centuries of economic deprivation and political instability have contributed to the creation of a state apparatus that not only fails to provide the most basic services to its citizens, but in some instances actively seeks to extract resources from them in order to support elites who control the state bureaucracy (Fatton, 2006). Haiti ranks 178 out of the 189 countries for which the United Nations collects the Human Development Indicators, a composite index used to measure average achievement in the three basic dimensions of human development, including a long and healthy life, knowledge, and a decent standard of living (United Nations Development Programme, 2019). Haiti is also the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere, with a GDP and government level of investment in public goods and services well below the average of its poorest neighbors in Latin America (The World Bank, 2019). In a study in Leogane, Haiti, data from interviews with fathers of young children provide a richer view of the harsh physical context in which Haitian parents and caregivers must make decisions about childcare. Fathers in this study emphasized the importance of feeding their children, paying for them to go to school, making sure they had access to needed health care services, and providing routine child care and episodic or sick care (Sloand et al., 2012). It is worth quoting a passage at length from this study, as it illustrates well the ways that concrete and vital expressions of love and care are conditioned by the pressing need for Haitian parents to struggle to provide the most basic necessities for their children. A vast majority of the fathers specifically talked about feeding their children, which in some cultures might be taken for granted, and perhaps parents would not bother to mention it. . . .In Haiti, feeding one’s children is a major challenge given the food insecurity of the country in general and the poverty of most of the people. It is a major life-or-death responsibility of parents. It is interesting to note that working hard and feeding children were mentioned by the fathers together in many cases. It seemed as if these two activities were bound together in the fathers’ minds: They had to work to feed their children. The men were straightforward about this. They did not say that they were working to get ahead, and none said that they were working to buy a bigger house, move to a better town, or to buy nicer clothes or other items or conveniences. They simply said that they worked so they could feed their children (Sloand et al., 2012, p. 491).

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An in-depth study of mothers in rural Haiti provides additional valuable context for the physically and emotionally exhausting demands of the average day of a Haitian mother with young children as she tries to earn an income to provide for their basic needs while also caring for those basic needs. This mother’s day unfolded as recounted here (and the authors noted that it was an accurate representation of the daily activities recounted to them by mothers in their study). I woke up around five o’clock because I had to go to Jeremie. I left at 5:30 a.m. I was going to resell coconuts and sweet oranges. I was walking. It took me 3 hours to make it. I arrived around 8:30 a.m. The selling was very good and quick. I finished selling around noon. I had bought coconuts for 2 gourdes and sold them for 3 gourdes (1 Haitian gourde = $0.08 U.S.). I made a profit of 1 gourde. I bought the sweet oranges for 13 gourdes and sold them for 20 gourdes. I made a profit of 7 gourdes. With the money I bought provisions. I bought fuel, spices, oil, and salt. .. .. I left town around 1:00 p.m. I arrived home around 3:30 p.m. I took a little rest. I drank water, after that I breastfed my baby. I cleaned up the greens, after that I cooked corn meal with beans and greens. I put red herring in it. When the food was cooked, I separated it and gave some to everybody in the house. It was about 7:00 p.m. When they finished eating we sat down. Around 8:00 p.m. I bathed the children and I fixed the bed for them to sleep. We went to sleep at 9:30 p.m. Before we slept we told old stories (Devin & Erickson, 1996, p. 484).

The struggle to keep children sufficiently nourished is widespread in Haiti. More than one in five (22%) of Haitian children under age five are stunted (have low height-for-age) and two out of three (66%) of children between 6–59 months are anemic (IHE & ICF, 2017). Variation in stunting levels in Haiti is correlated with income and maternal education levels. In the highest wealth quintile, 9% of children are stunted, while over one-third (34%) of children in the lowest wealth quintile are stunted. Children whose mothers have secondary education have a 15% stunting prevalence, while the prevalence of stunting for children whose mothers have no formal education is 32%. The highest prevalence in stunting (30%) happens between ages 18–35 months and stunting levels in rural areas are 24 percent, significantly higher than urban stunting rates of 18% (United States Agency for International Development, 2021, p. 2). In a particularly poignant excerpt from their investigation of barriers to vaccination in young children in rural Haiti, Coreil et al. (1996) told the story of a young mother’s utter devastation and shame at the realization, despite her conscientious efforts and sacrifices, that her infant was clinically malnourished. The authors found that the stigma of having malnourished children is a barrier for families to bring their children to free vaccination clinics, as the diagnosis of a child as underweight “marks a family as unable to meet the basic food needs of its children, and is experienced as a public embarrassment...” (p. 237). The consequences of malnutrition and related preventable diseases for Haitian children are dire: approximately one of every 10 children born in Haiti die before reaching age five (IHE & ICF, 2017).

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Adaptations by Parents and Caregivers for Survival in Haiti The Family Stress Model and Harshness-as-Adaptation Perspective The conditions of physical deprivation and difficulty in keeping children sufficiently nourished, under which Haitian parents and other caregivers must provide for children cause them understandable stress. There is limited data measuring parental stress in Haiti, but a small unpublished study of 67 mothers in Northern Haiti in 2020 using the Perceived Stress Survey and Mental Well-Being Survey (Hannan et al., 2016) revealed that maternal stress levels were high. Over half of mothers revealed that in the past month, they often or very often felt difficulties piling up so high that they could not overcome them, and 45% of mothers very often or often could not cope with all the things they had to do. Over half of the mothers surveyed reported that they rarely or never felt relaxed in the past month, and 57% reported rarely or never feeling optimistic in the past month (Global Center for the Development of the Whole Child, 2020, unpublished manuscript). The Family Stress Model (Conger et al., 1994; Minuchin, 1985) posits that elevated levels of stress and hardship experienced by parents may lead to harsher parenting strategies and generally poorer child developmental outcomes (Choi & Becher, 2019). This model assumes, however, that parental stress compromises or diminishes parenting quality in the face of stress, without a proper consideration of context or cultural values. Although this way of thinking may apply to Western cultural and parenting norms, it is questioned when applied to developing countries and contexts of deprivation. Perhaps a more appropriate perspective for resourcepoor contexts with long histories of tumult is the harshness-as-adaptation perspective (García Coll et al., 1996; White et al., 2018). The harshness-as-adaptation perspective suggests that parents may engage in harsher parenting practices as an adaptation to their surrounding environment. For example, social and environmental factors such as low SES, dangers (including exposure to violence or crime), family turmoil, and parental absence may influence harsher parenting behaviors as a means of adaptation to their surroundings and out of protection for their child (Chang & Lu, 2018; Furstenberg et al., 1993; Super & Harkness, 1986; White et al., 2016). Parenting research in the field of psychology has traditionally organized parenting styles into four categories initially conceptualized by Baumrind (1967, 1978, 1991): authoritative, authoritarian, dismissive, and permissive. These styles are ranked along dimensions of responsiveness demandingness, with authoritative parenting characterized by high demandingness and high responsiveness, authoritarian parenting typified by high demandingness and low responsiveness, dismissive parenting defined by low demandingness and low responsiveness, and permissive parenting marked by low demandingness and high responsiveness. Research suggests that authoritative parenting incorporates both love and support for the child while maintaining appropriate discipline in the home. Thus, this parenting style is typically associated with positive psychological, behavioral, and academic outcomes

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for children (Steinberg, 1990; Steinberg et al., 1989, 1991). Contrarily, authoritarian, dismissive, and permissive parenting styles are linked with poorer psychological, behavioral, and academic outcomes in children (Dornbusch et al., 1987; Steinberg et al., 1989). In low-income countries, research suggests that the styles adopted by parents are often linked to historical antecedents and economic realities. In Haiti, for example, a CDC study found exceedingly high rates of physical violence and emotional violence against children. The main perpetrators are parents and teachers. Haitian anthropologists have linked these practices to slavery and colonialism where compliance and “knowing your place” were serious, if not life and death, matters. Although there are scant recent empirical investigations into Haitian approaches to parenting, what evidence exists largely aligns with elements from the richer studies available on Latinx parenting. In Latinx families, for example, parenting practices are influenced by cultural values such as family obligation, family respect, and obedience (Calzada et al., 2010; Stein et al., 2015), which tend to shape stricter parenting styles when compared to White families (Halgunseth et al., 2006). Furthermore, research suggests that in Latinx families, it is common for multiple family members – both immediate and extended – to participate in child rearing practices (Vidal, 1988). Because of these cultural values, particularly family respect and obedience, Latinx parents tend to adhere to more authoritarian styles of parenting (Halgunseth et al., 2006) and report that harsh discipline (e.g., spanking) is a necessary and appropriate method of discipline (Calzada et al., 2013). Even in the face of extreme poverty and deprivation, life in Haitian communities goes on. Children are born, parents and families do their best to nourish them, educate them, and care for their medical needs. All of this occurs in a uniquely Haitian cultural context shaped by both past and present ecological conditions. Haitian culture is “collective, communal. . .[e]verything is about social relationships. . . People are not used to focusing on themselves or seeing themselves as separate from others” (Hoffman, 2019, p. 314). It is common for children to be raised “...apart from their biological parents” with their “capacities for social and emotional bonds [...] cultivated across a wide and diverse social field” (ClermontMathieu & Nicolas, 2015, p. 102).

The Role of the Extended Family A Haitian proverb, fanmi se dra, is rich in meaning and highlights the familycentered focus under which children are raised and cared for in Haiti. This proverb translates directly to family is a sheet with the deeper meaning that, “family is a sheet that wraps the baby at birth, protects it from the cold and the weather; as a ghost, the family covers and hides the disappointments and failures of the members of the family from the outside world” (Clermont-Mathieu & Nicolas, 2015, p. 101). By caring for extended family members and engaging in broad solidarity through sharing of financial resources, Haitian families form their own web of security that

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is unavailable from public institutions (Mwissa, 2004). The extended family in Haitian culture “is an institution of major importance. It permits the effective use of limited local resources in peasant economies, facilitates linkages across ruralurban and class divisions, and supports wider mobility [and] through the interdependence of households, it provides safeguards and stability for the highly diverse residential, reproductive, and support arrangements of individual family members” (LaGuerre, 1978, p. 408). In both urban and rural contexts, “extended family and fictive kin are usually the primary sources of support” and family is both “biological and relational” with households consisting of “multiple generations as well as extended and fictive kin [...] geared toward the needs and strengths of the extended family” (Edmond et al., 2007, p. 22). Extended family networks are essential in situations of intense resource scarcity, and these crucial family networks are maintained through “obligations of support and cultivation of relationships across a wide terrain of social and geographic space.” Also “the wide terrain of family can be read as an important avenue for achievement both in terms of social status as well as in a practical sense of maximising opportunity for both adults and children” (Hoffman, 2021, p. 585). Historically, in Haiti’s predominantly rural, agrarian populations, communities often consisted of a dozen or more lakay- individual homes- grouped together to form a lakou– a small village or compound with a shared central communal space (Edmond et al., 2007). Labor and finances were shared to support members of the lakou, and women in particular divided responsibilities amongst themselves for the care of children, embodying the Haitian proverb vwazinaj se fanmi (the neighborhood is the family). However, recent “pressures of increased poverty and landholding fragmentation brought about by the globalization of capitalism” (Edmond et al., 2007, p. 19) have altered the traditional lakou arrangement. As populations in Haiti moved to urban centers and rural families fragmented, the lakou system, while still present and active in some rural contexts, has given way to greater prevalence of “individual mothering, wherein single mothers are now the sole caretakers” (Edmond et al., 2007, p. 20).

Family Size and Structure in Haiti In its first two centuries, Haitian citizens maintained high fertility and birth rates out of necessity. Children were often needed for labor and guaranteed care for elderly parents. A Haitian proverb, pitit se riches malere (children are the wealth of the poor), illustrates the value of children in traditional rural, agrarian societies. Historically high birth rates in Haiti were facilitated not only by a desire for many children, but because contraception was inaccessible, infant mortality rates were high, and female education, in particular, was low (Nargund, 2009). The early 1980’s ushered in a decline of fertility rates due to changes in marriage patterns, new postpartum and breastfeeding practices, and increased access to modern contraceptives and abortion clinics (Poy & Paxman, 1997). Families were finally able to better control the life

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and deaths of their children. Increased emigration from Haiti to North America, South America, and other Caribbean islands also impacted fertility rates because of spousal separation (Bradatan, 2005). Haiti’s fertility rate, which peaked in 1982 at 6.15 compared to the global average of 3.67, now sits at 2.78 with a global average of 2.43, evidence of significant decline. Even as family size has decreased and the traditional lakou system has faded in prominence, Haitian culture still engages in more communal parenting and childcare practices than typical Western industrialized societies. In the past 50 years, economic, social, and political stressors have accelerated migration within Haiti, from rural to urban zones, and out of Haiti, into the Americas (Beckett, 2019; Jean-Pierre, 1994). About one in four Haitian children live apart from their birth parents as a result of domestic migration due to economic stress or for better educational opportunities for their children (Sommerfelt & Pedersen, 2009). International migration also impacts Haitian family structures and relationships. By the mid-the 1990s, one out of every four Haitians born in Haiti was living abroad, giving rise to the moniker of the diaspora as the “10th department” complementing Haiti’s nine departments (Jean-Pierre, 1994). In 2020, 1,770,000 Haitians lived outside of Haiti, with the majority living in the United States (705,000) or the Dominican Republic (496,000; Yates, 2021). Remittances sent by the Haitian diaspora back to loved ones in Haiti in 2018 were $3.324 billion USD, equivalent to 39% of Haiti’s GDP (Orozco, 2019). Outward migration of Haitians has contributed to more fluid family structures and the creation of broader transnational support systems. Family separation, where parents migrate out of Haiti to find work that will allow them to send remittances back to support the children and loved ones they are forced to leave behind, is a survival strategy amidst harsh conditions that leverages family connections for the good of the larger family unit. Building on the lakou traditions of shared parenting responsibilities among larger family groups, and as a survival response to poverty, parental death, and parental separation due to divorce or domestic/international migration for employment, both urban and rural family composition in Haiti has evolved. Modern Haitian household compositions are increasingly fluid, with matrifocality and child circulation/fosterage among extended family members an accepted norm (Hoffman, 2021, p. 580).

The Restavèk Situation in Haiti Much has been written about the restavèk situation in Haiti, which is real and tragic but should be distinguished from the fluidity of household composition and movement of children within larger extended families and friends. Restavèk in Haitian Creole literally translates in English as to stay with and refers to a practice in Haiti when children of poor rural families are sent to live and work in the homes of wealthier urban families (Leeds et al., 2010). Children (estimates range from 150,000–500,000 in contemporary Haiti) are sent by parents with the hope that the urban family will provide better access to education, food, and shelter than the rural

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family was able to provide (Smucker & Murray, 2004). Significant physical and emotional abuse and comparisons to conditions equaling modern day slavery have been documented for many restavèks (Freedom & des Avocats Internationaux, 2011). The harsh conditions of life in Haiti mean that although many restavèk children are free to leave their host families, they typically choose not to because they have no better place to go (Cooper et al., 2012). The choice of biological families to send their children as restavèks is rooted in the fact they cannot provide for their children and it seems like the best opportunity they can provide for their child (Cooper et al., 2012; Smucker & Murray, 2004). When compared to all Haitian children and the poorest Haitian children, restavèks have been found to attend school at statistically significant lower rates and to have more labor responsibilities, but restavèks simultaneously experience statistically significantly less physical abuse and less hunger than non-restavèk Haitian children (Haydocy et al., 2015). Although it is not a topic we are delving into deeply here, it should be noted that creches, or orphanages, supported by international aid groups have become increasingly common in Haiti in the past 25 years. Although some Haitian children certainly are relinquished to orphanages because parents and relatives have no means to care for them and do not intend to bring them back into the family, many parents who place their children in an orphanage often do so as a temporary measure. They use orphanages as a means to provide respite care as a last resort when they cannot provide for their children’s basic needs, and intend to (and very often do) return for their children once they can provide for their basic needs (Schwartz, 2008). A complete understanding of the fluidity of Haitian parenting and childcare arrangements requires distinguishing between abusive restavèk situations, use of orphanages as temporary solutions for distressed parents, and the generally accepted practice of moving children fluidly among extended family and friend networks for economic and educational benefits for children. For parents operating from a Western industrialized context focused on a nuclear family of a mother, father, and siblings living in one home separate from other extended family members, it is easy to look at the choices of Haitian parents as negative or less-than optimal. And, as noted above, many restavèks and children in sub-par orphanages suffer tremendously. However, there is a significant population of children in Haiti who are part of more fluid family arrangements, living with aunts, uncles, grandparents, or godparents, who are not mistreated physically or emotionally, and are able to attend school and have a more stable economic condition as a result of this fluidity. The desire for educational opportunities for their children as a pathway out of poverty to a more secure, stable life is a consistent value in Haitian culture. Haitian parents will “go to great lengths to find the money to send their children to school, even if the quality is questionable. . . .[parents] will allow their children to live with other families if they believe it will make education accessible” (Udy, 2016, p. 66). In the spirit of the Haitian proverb, degaje pa peche (making do is not a sin), and when funds are not available to send all their children to school, families will stagger attendance, sending one child one year and another the next (Sloand et al., 2012, p. 492). It is in some ways easier, and certainly more urgent, to investigate situations of abuse for children, and the existence and horror of restavèks and children in

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orphanages in Haiti should not be hidden or downplayed. However, fluid family arrangements in Haiti are not always detrimental to child health and flourishing. Parents in Haiti often make the hard choice to live apart from their children because they need to migrate for increased income or to offer their children legitimately better educational opportunities. These choices should not be viewed as sub-par parenting on the part of Haitian parents, but rather as a reasonable and loving response to the difficult conditions that shape the options available to parents. A current gap in our understanding of Haitian parenting and family conditions is lack of evidence and data about children living apart from their biological parents who are not in abusive or psychologically damaging situations. Whether in restavèk contexts or when children live with their biological parents or in extended families, the prevalence of violence in Haitian child rearing practices is widely documented and acknowledged. Clermont-Mathieu and Nicolas (2015) argued that Haitian parenting styles are indelibly shaped by the historical slave/ master relationship in which respect and obedience are expected from children, who have a limited right to autonomy and expressions (Clermont-Mathieu & Nicolas, 2015, p. 99). Child rearing techniques in Haiti are undoubtedly influenced by the environment in which families live and the fear that conditions of deprivation inspire. Haitian parents may legitimately feel they do not have the luxury of kindness when the line between life and death lies in the urgency of communication between a parent and a child. Battered by hurricanes, earthquakes, and dire poverty, concerns about safety and survival of children, and intense parental stress can make violence a tempting choice. As slaves, Haitian parents were expected to mold their child into docile servants so the margin for trial and error was slim: listen now or be whupped later by the slave master (Patton, 2017). Corporal punishment was held up as an effective tool against defiance by colonists, and such destructive practices must be unlearned and replaced by different effective tools in the face of harsh living conditions. Corporal punishment, defined as “violence inflicted on children by parents, caregivers, teachers, and others in the name of discipline” (Subedi et al., 2019, p. 928) was prohibited in families and homes in 2001 under Haitian law. Although we are not in any way justifying or arguing for its continued use by parents (and rather are reporting the evidence), corporal punishment is still generally accepted in Haitian culture with 30% of parents truly believing in its efficacy. Some Haitian parents view independence as impermissible out of fear that the child will make the wrong decisions and lead delinquent lives. Thus, they use corporal punishment as a physical replacement of the control lost in an effort to modify the unwanted behavior (Subedi et al., 2019). Lack of control, however, is not limited to that of the child. Fathers in particular use corporal punishment as an outlet when they are unable to fulfill expectations dictated by traditional gender roles, such as providing financially (Bermudez et al., 2019). Haitian fathers are often portrayed in extant literature, if not directly violent, as distant and uninvolved (Colin, 2000; Pierce & Elisme, 2000). The 2014 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)‘s national survey found high rates of violence against children in Haiti. One of the main perpetrators of physical violence and emotional violence against children were parents and other adult household

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members: “Almost two-thirds of both females and males aged 18 to 24 years in Haiti experienced physical violence by adult household members or authority figures in the community, such as teachers, prior to the age of 18 years” (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 2014, p. 51). In addition, the CDC found that “approximately one-third of both females and males in Haiti experienced emotional violence by an adult household member prior to turning 18 years of age” (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 2014, p. 57). Subedi et al. (2019) sought to understand the breadth of corporal punishment in Haiti and found that emotional and physical violence, after the 2012 hurricane, occurred in families at rates of 36.3% (emotional) and 22.3% (physical). Emotional abuse was assessed by asking household parents if they had ever (1) yelled at their child, (2) called them dumb, lazy, etc., (3) revoked privileges, (4) asked the child to kneel, or (5) deprived the child of a meal as punishment. Physical punishment was defined as: shaking the children, pulling their ears, hitting or slapping the child’s body, or beating the child repeatedly with force. Haiti has historically seen an increase in domestic violence following a natural disaster due to exacerbated economic and food insecurities. Children who lived in refugee camps experience higher levels of abuse compared to children who do not live in camps (Subedi et al., 2019).

Conclusion This review of the existing research and data available about Haitian parenting and childcare highlights the importance of cultural and historical knowledge to ground interpretation of parenting practices in a resource-scarce environment like Haiti. Haitian families and children have received a number of well-intentioned interventions from various NGOs and bilateral donors aimed at improving outcomes for children who suffer tremendously under harsh conditions of poverty. We argue that interventions targeting Haitian parents with the goal of improving outcomes for children would have greater impact if they were grounded in the understanding that child care choices in Haiti are fundamentally shaped by the culturally and historically conditioned norm of fluid family structures and the use of harsher approaches in childcare as necessary adaptations to harsh living conditions. Parenting and childcare decisions in Haiti might, if not examined more closely, appear harmful to observers because they run counter to conceptions of good parental care in most industrialized, wealthier nations where family life is centered on the nuclear family. To be clear- fluid family arrangements are not always in the best interests of Haitian children. However, those working to improve outcomes for Haitian children might miss the ingenuity and resources that extended family and fictive kin provide for childcare needs in the midst of Haiti’s harsh social and economic climate. In many instances, these family networks could be leveraged to improve outcomes for vulnerable Haitian children. We believe that harshness in parenting and childcare in Haiti is an issue that, while understandable given the stress Haitian caregivers are under to provide for children’s most basic needs, must

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be reduced because of the damage it does. But only by understanding the root causes of violence against children in historical context and as a reaction to the difficult environmental constraints of Haiti’s deep poverty can steps be taken to provide Haitian caregivers with the physical resources and culturally appropriate tools needed to reduce that violence.

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Kate Schuenke-Lucien is the Director for Haiti and Senior Associate Director for Strategic Planning at the University of Notre Dame’s Global Center for the Development of the Whole Child. After graduating from Wheaton College with degrees in political science and Spanish in 2002, she taught at a Haitian K-12 school and provided adult education courses in Cap-Haitien, Haiti. She earned a Master’s degree in Latin American Studies from Tulane University in 2005 as a Foreign Language and Area Studies Fellow for Haitian Creole. Kate is currently a PhD candidate (ABD) in political science at the University of Notre Dame. Abigail Mills is a Postdoctoral Fellow with the University of Notre Dame’s Global Center for the Development of the Whole Child. She supports empirical research to inform practice and policy advancement in low- and middle-income countries. Mills is a developmental psychologist who focuses on the development and evaluation of intervention programming and resources designed to improve social and emotional outcomes for youth. She is passionate about supporting youth facing adversity to reach their full potential. Dr. Mills holds a Master’s of Arts (2019) and Doctoral degree (2021) in developmental psychology from the University of Notre Dame. Bryanna Beamer is a Master of Global Affairs candidate at the University of Notre Dame, Keough School, with a concentration in International Peace Studies. Bryanna served in Peace Corps Ghana where she primarily worked in the Junior High School to create a boys and girls club focused on education, self-confidence, and vocational opportunities. Most recently, she worked with a women’s victims group in The Gambia to engage expressive arts healing practices. Bryanna received her BA in Psychology with an emphasis on childhood and adolescent development and minority group experiences and conducted research on mindfulness’ effects on attention span in youth.

Between Tradition and Modernity: The Changing Patterns of Parenting in Nigeria Osifunke Ekundayo and Muyiwa Adigun

Introduction Parenting is the process of raising and educating a child from birth until adulthood (Brooks, 2013). It also refers to carrying out the responsibilities of raising and relating to children in such a manner that the child is well prepared to realize his or her full potential. The child can be biological or non-biological. The potentials include the physical, the emotional, the social and the intellectual. Most parents learn parenting practices from their own parents; some they accept and some they discard. When parenting methods are passed on from one generation to the next, both desirable and undesirable practices are perpetuated. These practices may be cultural values. Culture is a way of life of a group of people. It includes behaviors, values, and beliefs that people accept and are passed by mostly communication and imitation from one generation to another. Culture provides meaning, value and guidance to human life. According to Avishai Margalit and Joseph Raz (1990), culture provides (often but not always) a secure sense of identity, self-esteem and therefore wellbeing. Culture varies from one society to another and even within the same group of people depending on the period (Michael Freeman, 1998). This means that culture is not static but dynamic. It is expressed in terms of human behaviors, shared among a people, practised by a whole group of people from generation to generation, and learned rather than inherited (Bland & Jackson, 1990). The right to culture has been recognised in several international instruments. The Universal Declaration of Human Rights (UDHR) states in Article 27 that ‘[e] veryone has the right freely to participate in the cultural life of the community.’

O. Ekundayo Department of Private and Property Law, Faculty of Law, University of Ibadan, Ibadan, Nigeria M. Adigun (*) Department of Public Law, Faculty of Law, University of Ibadan, Ibadan, Nigeria e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_18

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Article 1 of the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights (ICCPR) and the International Covenant on Economic Social and Cultural Rights (ICESCR) recognise the right to self-determination and the right of peoples to ‘freely pursue their cultural development.’ Similarly, Article 27 of the ICCPR recognises the rights of minorities to enjoy their culture which includes practising their religion and using their own language. Article 31 of the Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC) stipulates that children have the right to participate freely in cultural life and the arts. In Africa, Article 17 of the African Charter on Human and Peoples’ Rights (ACHPR) contains provisions regarding the duty of the State to promote and protect ‘morals and traditional values recognised by the community’. This provision is similar to Article 12 of the African Charter on the Rights and Welfare of the Child (ACRWC). Similarly, Article 22 of the ACHPR stipulates that ‘all peoples have the right to economic, social and cultural development with due regard to their freedom and identity and in the equal enjoyment of the common heritage of mankind’. In Nigeria, the ACHPR has been enacted into law through the African Charter on Human and Peoples’ Rights (Ratification and Enforcement) Act. The CRC has also been enacted into law through the Child’s Rights Act. These imply that the right to culture of everyone including the child is recognised in Nigeria. In this study, parenting as a reflection of cultural practice is examined in Nigeria. This study is divided into five parts. The first part introduces the study. The second part examines parenting in a traditional Nigerian setting. The third part examines the outcome of the forces of tradition and modernity and their impact on parenting. The fourth part examines parenting from the perspective of modern Nigeria. The fifth part concludes the study.

Parenting in Traditional Nigerian Society In the Nigerian (and African) systems of thought and practices, child rearing practices are communicated through indigenous folklore, music, religion, and language. The Nigerian parent brings up a child to imbibe the cultural values of the land and also be a responsible adult. This is done through story telling (folktales), the extended family, traditional rites and the mother’s care, attention and love. The uniqueness of this system with regards to parenting in the traditional Nigerian (and African) communities is that the responsibility in taking care of the child belongs not only to the biological parents. A child is looked after not only by his parents or the immediate family, but by extended families, relations, neighbours and the community. This is buttressed by the Yoruba proverb on parenting which stipulates that ‘a single hand cannot nurse a child.’ Similarly, there is an African adage that says that ‘it takes a village to raise a child.’ Traditional care for the child in the family and the community includes love, security, education and training to prepare the child for adult life. The implication is that although the mother has the responsibility of taking care of the child, the responsibility is shared by all.

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The Extended Family System There are two types of family, the nuclear and the extended family. The nuclear family is made up of both parents and the children. The extended family is made up of the nuclear family and uncles, aunties, grandparents, cousins and others. According to Degbey (2012), the extended family system includes several generations plus cousins, uncles, and aunts living in a compound or close to one another. Similarly, Adinlofu (2009) stated that the extended family is composed of a number of joint, compound, elementary and nuclear families occupying separate but nearby homesteads. The communities are carefully structured and are hierarchical with elders, adults and young people. In this setting, decision-making is collective, not individual. In the African community, the extended family system is traditionally practised (Degbey, 2012), and when one speaks of the family in an African context, one is referring to the extended one (Gyekye, 1996). In the African traditional setting, a young mother has help in bringing up her child. Mothers-in-law, aunts, and older siblings step in to help take care of the infant. In this setting, parenthood is about social responsibility even where there is no biological but only a social link. No child can starve even if the parents are not available; neither can a child be orphaned because all the children belong to the community. Children are seen as blessings to the community at large (Ayua & Okagbue, 1996). Fathering refers not only to the biological father but to all men in the father’s age group. A child does not restrict the title of father to his/her male parent but extends its application to his uncles and all the father’s age group. Similarly, the mother’s female age mates are mothers to the child. The mother’s sisters and age mates are referred to as mother as well. Using such terms as uncle or aunt shows division and is seen as disrespectful. The family plays a significant role in the child’s life and is responsible for protecting his/her interests. In Nigeria, the word for aunt in the language means ‘little mother’. Childcare is often viewed as a communal activity, and extended family members can be equally involved in the child’s development. The household family also includes other relatives of the father such as younger unmarried or widowed sisters and aged parents. Roles are well defined and strategies are developed by elders to support the development and growth of young people. Young people learn from elders and elders take pleasure in playing this teaching role given their objective which is to pass onto young people a stable society. Social norms are shared by the members of the community. The extended family helps to develop a strong sense of social responsibility in the child. The child learns to be a respectful, responsible and supportive member of the extended family and society. The system is one in which a brother trains a younger brother or sister and they in turn help to train younger ones or older siblings’ children. This is why it is said that even when parents are dead, a child always has ‘parents’. In the extended family system, children or youths stay at home and live with the family until they are ready for marriage. Even after marriage, the parents would still want to offer advice and guidance since they believe that they have richer experiences than their children. In some instances, the extended family may not be together but the nuclear family may

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live with other nuclear families who may not be relatives. This system of living is what is called the ‘compound house’ system. In addition, this system allows any elderly person to discipline or correct a child.

The Role of Elders In Nigeria, there is considerable importance attached to respect for elders and ancestors. There is little if anything that elders do not know about their community. In their own way they do their best to keep things going the way they should. In most traditional Nigerian societies, elders gather the younger ones by fireside or moonlight, inside or outside the compound and tell them folk tales and taboos which are a unique feature in traditional religion. The child in return is expected to respect not just his/her parents, but every older person in the house and neighbourhood (Okupa, 1998).

The Role of Fathers According to Makinwa-Adebusoye (2001), the major characteristic features of African household is that they are mostly patriarchal and hierarchical, polygamous and open. The patriarchal nature of the society subordinates women. Fathers are the bread winners and protectors of the home. They are the pillars on which the family leans for direction. They guide the home toward a common goal of living in harmony. Fathers do not just sit about and issue instructions; they actively take part in herding, and farming activities. Their role is to advise, direct and lead their families and societies in practices, rituals and ceremonies that ensure survival, existence and continuity. Since fathers are supposed to lead their families, this role is critical to maintaining an atmosphere of stability in the home. Consequently, children are more likely to be mentally and emotionally stable when they have responsible fathers.

The Role of Mothers Traditionally, a woman’s place has been inferior to men. This feeds into strongly defined traditional gender roles and ultimately leads to women having a lower social status. As the child grows, he/she sees the virtues being exhibited by the mother and all of these enhance good parenting. Nigerian culture places the mother in the role of the keeper of the house. She is a housewife and makes sure that she caters for all the domestic needs of the children. The mother serves as a support system to the child especially, when the extended family is not around. She is also a central figure in a child’s life, and by extension, the community.

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The Role of the Child A child passes through three stages: infancy, childhood and youth. The stage of infancy is between 0 and 7 years. The child is dependent at this stage on the family. The Childhood stage is between 8 and 12 years. The child has some duties and responsibilities in the family. Youth is between 13 and 20 years. Apart from these, a person is still technically a child unless he or she is married. At this age, the child would have undergone circumcision and initiation rites on attainment of puberty. Children born during the same period would bond into an age grade association. Boys in the same age grade association would be circumcised in the same season. This also applies to girls. Girls who have their first menstruation in the same season will be in their own age set. Each child belongs to an ‘age set’ from birth. To control the vices of pride, jealousy and selfishness, children must obey the rules governing relationships within the age set, between age sets, and between the sexes. Under traditional settings these are controlled with taboos. A daughter, for example, must not be present while her father is eating. Young girls are taught that they should respect their mothers and all women of their age group as well as all elders in general. They also should not enter any house when an elder is inside; they should wait until he leaves to enter the house. They should never share a seat with their fathers. Most importantly, when they want to ask anything from their fathers, they should first check with their mothers about whether the language they are about to use is appropriate. Respect fosters social order. This is a basic requirement for the keeping of the peace in human societies. Taboos are believed to encourage good manners in the society, even though they are attached to consequences. As a result, children learn acceptable behaviour patterns. While the family plays a significant role in the child’s life and is responsible for protecting his/her interest, the child too has an obligation to contribute to the sustenance of the community. The contribution can be in form of labour, for example, farming. The child has been tutored in obedience and respect and is unlikely to see his/her stage of childhood as a period during which he may assert his/her rights. Childhood places children under the authority of adults, who have the rights and authority to define and determine the tradition and customs with which he/she must abide.

Puberty Rites Another significant traditional practice that instills discipline and fosters good parenting skills in Nigerian youths, especially young girls, is the set of puberty rites. This is one of the main traditional practices which have been eroded by modernization and education. The puberty rite is a traditional practice that is performed mainly on adolescent girls to initiate them into womanhood. This helps to prevent pregnancy or pre-marital sex as the rites are known to bring disgrace,

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shame and curses upon their families and society. Once the rules of the purity rites are flouted, there would be ostracism of the girl’s family. In some communities, a ritual would be performed on both the girl and the man responsible for the pregnancy. The rite is a form of punishment for not waiting to get married before having sex and becoming pregnant. The rite is performed in public to ensure that other young girls and boys would be patient until they are initiated and get married. It is crucial to understand that puberty rites for boys are often common in the northern parts of the country even though they are scarcely talked about as compared to the girls’ rites. Though puberty rites may differ from one community or ethnic group to another, the reason for this initiation is similar. For instance, the puberty rite was initiated to protect young girls and adolescents from teenage pregnancy, prostitution and sexually transmitted diseases. It was also introduced to teach the young woman how to be responsible and take care of her own family.

Between Tradition and Modernity Traditional African family patterns are slowly but progressively being altered because of modernization which is exhibited through trends like urbanization. Family patterns that were the norm in traditional rural African societies are gradually being substituted by modern values. Sub-Saharan Africa has one of the fastest annual population growth rates (Merrick, 2002:41). It currently has the fastest rate of urbanization in the world. The transformation of societies in the sub-continent from rural to urban settings has contributed to staggering changes in family structures. This has triggered the distortion of the cultural/traditional norms and values that characterized rural communities in the region. Despite the changes taking place in sub-Saharan African societies, the family remains a prominent nexus in the social life of Africans. Contemporary Nigerian family patterns are subjected to changes as a result of ameliorated economic conditions, education and health opportunities. These factors continuously exert a tremendous impact on contemporary family patterns in the country. Socioeconomic circumstances in Nigeria are encountering alterations that have, to a considerable extent, triggered changes in the fundamental cultural values, most especially in the family domain.

Marriage Patterns Marriage is still quite important in African communities. The age at first marriage ranges between 17 to 22 years for women. In traditional rural African societies, the contract of marriage was handled by parents who arranged marriages by selecting marriage partners for their children. This was mostly done for the sake of the

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daughters. This was done without the consent of the children. However, in contemporary African societies, this has been altered to the extent that some countries have adopted policies that strive to advocate for the consent of both parties that are to be married. Some examples are the Tanzania Marriage Act of 1971 and the Ivory Coast Civil Code of 1964 (Therborn, 2004). This does not imply that the involvement of parents in the marriage of their children has been halted. The adoption of these Acts has helped to promote the recognition of the consent of the parties to be married as well as fostering the right of prospective partners to select their partners. Despite this development, the selection of marriage partners is still done with the consent of family members. At the point of marriage, women tend to have lower statuses than all the members of their husband’s family (Makinwa-Adebusoye (2001). Polygamous marriages dominated traditional societies. Makinwa-Adebusoye (2001) explained that as of 1999, in Nigeria, 32.7% of married women were in polygamous marriages that were made up of two or more wives. This is a consequence of the trend of early marriage. Most of the women got married quite young, mostly to older men. Polygamy constitutes a prime feature of rural Africa. Africa has the highest rate of polygamy in the world (Therborn, 2004). The practice of polygamy is centred on the notion of precluding the situation of husband shortage. Marriage in contemporary sub-Saharan Africa including Nigeria is substantially marked by a shift from polygamous marriages to monogamous marriages. This is prominent in urban areas in the region, mostly among the younger generations. This however does not mean that polygamous marriages do not occur; it is just on a smaller scale. Traditional tenets of African marriages are increasingly subjected to stabilization amid sporadic societal changes emanating from modernization and globalization. Kalu (1981:350) emphasized that this inherently brings into perspective the need for the redefinition of the role and features of marriage. There is still prevalence of early female marriage (Caldwell and Caldwell 1987). But the age at first marriage is experiencing a slight delay. Marriage in Africa including Nigeria is subjected to the task of adaptation, amid sporadic changes emanating from the society. This in essence sets the pace for the redefinition of its role and characteristics (Kalu, 1981). Changing marriage patterns have altered the parenting structure in sub-Saharan Africa including Nigeria. As a result, families are differently defined.

Change in Family Size The advent of modernity has inherently fostered a progressive transformation of African family organization marked by the drift from larger family sizes to smallsize households. In traditional settings, a large family size was believed to be instrumental to economic prosperity. Also, individuals benefited from the support systems that their large families provided. However, large families could also be a disadvantage because of the economic burden and family wrangling. The factors that have been identified to be responsible for high fertility rates in the past are extensive.

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They range from high infant and child mortality to low contraceptive use and early marriage. Family structures in Nigeria and sub-Saharan Africa at large are experiencing changes which are reflected in dropping childbirth rates and age at first marriage. However, extended families still have quite a stronghold in Africa despite the advent of modernisation. The main reason for this has been linked to the role that extended family plays as social security in the society. In contemporary settings, the extended family is made up only of a married couple and their children and also includes just uncles, aunties, and grandparents and no longer several members of the clan. There is a steady increase in the pace towards the abandonment of traditional practices for modern (Western) ones. However, the most popular trend is that of the prevalence of family patterns that are increasingly merging traditional and modern marriage norms or practices (Kalu, 1981:2). There are other practices such as non-marital childbearing, single parenthood and non-marital unions that are gradually gaining momentum in the country. All these have triggered a shift from polygamous marriages that dominated rural sub-Saharan African communities including Nigeria to monogamous marriages as well as the movement from large households to small ones.

Parenting in Modern Nigeria The traditional Nigerian family system, as described in previous paragraphs, has evolved due to the influence of external systems and forces which have corroded the rich parental values that Nigerians had. The extended family system which is under pressure is rapidly eroding. It is failing to fulfil its primary role of socialisation. In urban areas, for instance, the nuclear family is cropping up. Presently, there is little to no cohesion; it is just the individual, his family, his work and his property. This has resulted in less socialization. Currently, families bring up their children in estates where a family does not know who their neighbours are. As a result, when problems arise in such communities, nobody cares. Again, the media has taken precedence in African families as children no longer listen to folktales anymore. They are rather occupied with the television, internet, foreign books and computers. The resultant effect is that people are more isolated and lonely. These modern gadgets have limited information concerning Nigerian and African cultural values. In fact, a child raised in a modern Nigerian setting perceives most traditional cultural practices as something devilish and believes that a lot of its practices are attributed to the gods. In addition, younger generations, who have not fully experienced the indigenous culture, believe that to be too culturally aware makes one backward. This is as a result of lack of knowledge of the traditional cultural values and principles in Nigeria. In a situation where a wife or mother works in the bank, she wakes up at dawn each day. Because she has no extended family member staying with her, she has to make sure the children have been bathed and fed before she goes to work around 5:

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30 or 6:00 am. She spends the whole day at work and often comes home when the children are asleep. This often results in the children developing bad feeding habits, lacking adequate motherly care and training. While this has put a burden on the women and the family, it has also dramatically improved the status of women. The previously subordinate position of women is now being seriously challenged. With the changed position of women, family life has been positively affected. The mother now has a say in her child’s upbringing. A lot of young people have lost sight of the rich cultural values of Nigerians. Many young people no longer give a helping hand to adults and do not give up their seats to the elderly whether in public or private. Morality and chastity have declined. At present, teenage pregnancy is on the increase. Young girls do not regard their cultural values as far as virginity and marriage are concerned. Young couples give birth before they plan marriage. Some consequences are due to poor parental care and control. This has ended in the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and the proliferation of abandoned children who roam in the bigger cities as hawkers, prostitutes, pickpockets and armed robbers. While modernity has put a strain on tradition and the above situation appears dismal, the reality is that some things are lost while others are gained. On one hand, there is the substantial erosion of the extended family life and the communal raising of children. On the other hand, the status of women and the treatment of girls have dramatically improved.

Conclusion This study examined parenting as a cultural practice in Nigeria. Nigerian culture contributes to the upbringing of young people and parenting in Nigeria is torn between the forces of tradition and modernity. The family system played a considerable role in parenting in a traditional Nigerian setting. The goal of parenting in the traditional system was primarily to teach the individual not only understanding but also an appreciation of the culture she or he has inherited, complete with the skills necessary to carry on that culture and practice. The emphasis was on the attainment of knowledge, values, and skills developed before one was born, so that the individual could use them and pass them on as an integral member of society. This is the uniqueness of the Nigerian traditional system with respect to parenting in traditional communities. But the Nigerian family patterns are increasingly faced with the pressure between tradition and modernity. In contemporary Nigerian society, the extended family is losing value, especially in bigger and busier cities. As change becomes more rapid and profound, it becomes increasingly apparent that parenting in Nigeria is evolving and that cultural heritages are no longer absolute and unchanging but are subject to amendment and alteration. Strict adherence to the parenting system inherited from the past is no longer feasible. The occurrence of competition between traditional and modern family patterns illustrates a dichotomy.

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There is a rise in the pace towards the abandonment of traditional practices for Western habits. However, the most popular trend is that of the prevalence of family patterns that are increasingly merging traditional and modern marriage norms, values or practices. While the trend may be difficult to reverse, nonetheless parenting in Nigeria does not have to be at the mercy of the contending forces of tradition and modernity. New institutions and behaviours to cope with new situations have to be developed. Thus, nuclear families can connect with their extended ones by visiting their hometowns. Parents can also frequently introduce their children to their extended families on both sides. In addition, parents can endeavour to revisit the old stories, make time and narrate them to their children. With this, the tenets of parenting would have been shared and practised by a whole group of people from generation to generation. The government also has many roles to play. The internet should be laden with Nigerian cultural values. The children should be taught history starting from primary school and made to appreciate the positive values of the society they are growing up in.

References Adinlofu, E. (2009). Modernity and the ‘extended family system’. Retrieved on November 30, 2021 from www.nigeriansinamerica Ayua, I. A., & Okagbue, I. E. (Eds.). (1996). The rights of the child in Nigeria. Nigerian Institute of Advanced Lagos Studies. Bland, M., & Jackson, P. (1990). Effective employee communications. Kogan Page. Brooks, J. B. (2013). The process of parenting. McGraw-Hill. Caldwell, J. C., & Caldwell, P. (1987). The cultural context of high fertility in Sub-Saharan Africa. Population and Development Review, 13(3), 409–437. Degbey, J. L. (2012). Africa family structure. Retrieved on November 30, 2021 from http://www. jicef.or.jp/wahec/ful217.html Freeman, M. (1998). Human rights and real cultures: Towards a dialogue on Asian values. Netherlands Quarterly of Human Rights, 16(1), 25–39. Gyekye, K. (1996). African cultural values: An introduction. Sankofa Publishing Company. Kalu, W. J. (1981). Modern Ga family life patterns: A look at changing marriage structure in Africa. Journal of Black Studies, 11(3), 349–359. Makinwa-Adebusoye, P. (2001). Sociocultural factors affecting fertility in Sub-Saharan Africa (pp. 12(2)–12(16)). Population Division, Department of Economic and Social Affairs, United Nations Secretariat, UN/POP/PFD/2001/2. Margalit, A., & Raz, J. (1990). National self-determination. The Journal of Philosophy, 87(9), 439–461. Merrick, T. W. (2002). Population and poverty: New views on an old controversy. International Family Planning Perspectives, 28(1), 41–46. Okupa, E. (1998). International bibliography of African customary law: Ius non scriptum. International African Institute. Therborn, G. (2004). African families in a global context (Research report, No.131). Nordiska Afrikainstitutet.

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Osifunke Ekundayo is a Reader in the Department of Private and Property Law, Faculty of Law, University of Ibadan, Ibadan, Nigeria. She teaches Law of Succession and Family Law at the undergraduate level, and Comparative Family Law and International Human Rights Law at the postgraduate level. She obtained B.Sc., MLS., and LL.B from University of Ibadan; LL.M from Obafemi Awolowo University; M.A. from Queen Mary University of London and PhD from SOAS University of London. She is a Recipient of Mac Arthur Staff Development Fellowship. Her research area of focus is on women and children’s rights. Muyiwa Adigun is a Senior Lecturer in the Department of Public Law, Faculty of Law, University of Ibadan, Ibadan, Nigeria. He received his doctorate in law from the University of the Witwatersrand, Johannesburg. His research works on children include: ‘The Implementation of the Convention on the Rights of the Child in Nigeria’ [2019] Public Law, Issue 3, 476-494; and ‘The Implementation of the African Charter on Human and Peoples’ Rights and the Convention on the Rights of the Child in Nigeria: The Creation of Irresponsible Parents and Dutiful Children?’ 51(3) The Journal of Legal Pluralism and Unofficial Law 320–349.

Mother-Child Emotional Availability Across Cultures: Findings from Western and Non-Western Countries Diane L. Putnick, Marc H. Bornstein, and Joan T. D. Suwalsky

Introduction The mother-child relationship is often considered to be the most influential in a young child’s life (Bowlby, 1958; Cassidy, 2018; Frankel, 1994). Positive motherchild relationships have been linked to better cognitive functioning (Erickson et al., 2018; Estrada et al., 1987), socialization (Fernandes et al., 2020; Kochanska et al., 1999), emotion understanding (Cooke et al., 2016; Steele et al., 1999), and even a reduced likelihood of obesity (Anderson & Whitaker, 2011; Bergmeier et al., 2020). Through their interactions with mothers and other caregivers, children learn about the world and develop internal working models of social relationships. Internal working models are mental representations of the caregiver that guide expectations about future behavior, which children use in establishing future relationships (Dykas & Cassidy, 2011; Sroufe et al., 1999; Waters et al., 2021). For example, children who have been consistently supported by their mothers (or another central caregiver) may think of themselves as competent, worthy of love, and expect others also to treat them well (Laible et al., 2004; Shaw et al., 2004). It is important to note that although this chapter focuses on mother-child relationships, father-child relationships are also important (Lamb & Lewis, 2013). We limit this chapter to mother-child relationships because mothers are still the primary

D. L. Putnick (*) · J. T. D. Suwalsky Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, Bethesda, MD, USA e-mail: [email protected] M. H. Bornstein Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, Bethesda, MD, USA The Institute for Fiscal Studies, London, UK UNICEF, New York, NY, USA © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_19

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caregivers across the globe (Bornstein & Putnick, 2016; Craig & Mullan, 2011), and the body of research on father-child emotional availability is smaller and quite limited to Western contexts (e.g., Bergmann & Klein, 2020; de Falco et al., 2009; Hallers-Haalboom et al., 2014; Lovas, 2005; McMahon et al., 2019; Rossen et al., 2018; van Ee et al., 2013). The importance of the relationship with mothers and the development of internal working models are believed to be culturally common (Pierrehumbert et al., 2009), but there may be systematic, culturally specific variations in the ways mothers interact with and parent their children (Bornstein & Lansford, 2010; Mesman et al., 2018). Parenting does not occur in isolation but always in a social and cultural context. Parenting and cultures are, therefore, intertwined because a major goal of parenting is to rear children to be well-functioning members of the culture into which they were born and within which they will live (Bornstein et al., 2011; Lansford et al., 2021). In this chapter, we explore cross-cultural variation in one central aspect of the mother-child relationship: emotional availability.

What Is Mother-Infant Emotional Availability and How Is It Measured? Human experiences are inherently emotional, and children’s and adults’ experiences of the world and others in it are permeated with emotion. Emotions are at the core of human attachments, communications, and interactions (Emde, 1980, 2000), and emotions are powerful intra- and interpersonal regulators of behavior (Bornstein et al., 2012b). Emotional availability (EA) is a global, dyadic perspective on parentchild relationships that assesses mutual emotional responsiveness and attunement (Emde, 1980). A dyad high in emotional availability is one in which both partners adapt their behavior to the other, share positive affective exchanges, and interact in a constructive, synchronous manner (Biringen, 2000; Biringen et al., 2014). The Emotional Availability Scales (EAS; Biringen, 2008) were specifically designed to assess emotional availability through observations and ratings of parent-child interactions. The EAS reflect age-appropriate behaviors in parentchild interactive cycles. The EAS consist of six globally rated dimensions concerned with emotional communication and interaction. Four scales assess maternal behavior: Sensitivity, Structuring, Nonintrusiveness, and Nonhostility. Two scales capture infant/child behavior: Responsiveness to and Involving of mother. Although each of the six individual EAS focuses on the behavior of one partner, all EA dimensions are viewed as “relationship variables” because the scoring of each takes the other partner’s behavior into account. Thus, the EAS assess specific behaviors of individuals but at the same time constitute global ratings of dyads that capture joint interactional style. To code the EAS, Biringen et al. (1998) recommend viewing at

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least 20 minutes of natural or semi-structured interaction. Interactions are watched repeatedly while focusing on different codes, and each of the six scales is assigned a single rating for the full interaction. Maternal Sensitivity assesses acceptance, warmth, flexibility, appropriate emotion regulation, and variety and creativity of behavior displayed toward the child. Maternal Structuring assesses appropriate facilitation, scaffolding, or organizing of the child’s activity, exploration, and routine by providing rules, regulations, and a supportive framework for interaction without compromising the child’s autonomy and interest in activities. Maternal Nonintrusiveness measures support for the child without being overdirecting, overstimulating, overprotective, or interfering. Maternal Nonhostility measures talking to or behaving with the child in a way that is patient, pleasant, and harmonious and not rejecting, abrasive, or antagonistic. Child Responsiveness focuses on age- and context-appropriate exploring and responding to the mother’s bids (the balance between relatedness and autonomy) as well as enjoyment of the interaction. Child Involving assesses the child’s engagement of the mother. Taken together, the six EAS yield an overall assessment of the dyad’s level of emotional functioning. Each scale has a cut-point above which the dyad is presumed to be functioning in an adaptive manner and below which the dyad is believed to be at risk for negative sequelae. A more complete description of the EAS can be found in Biringen and Easterbrooks (2012). The EAS are currently in their fourth edition (Biringen, 2008). In the fourth edition, all dimensions are rated on 7-point scales, with high scores indicating more optimal dyadic functioning. When evaluating research employing the EAS, it is important to consider the edition of the scales being reported because scaling and interpretation differ depending on the edition that was used. For example, in the third edition (Biringen et al., 1998, 2000a), Maternal Sensitivity was rated on a 9-point scale, Maternal Structuring, Nonintrusiveness, and Nonhostility were rated on 5-point scales, and Child Responsiveness and Involving were rated on 7-point scales. In the second edition (Biringen et al., 2000b), Maternal Structuring and Intrusiveness were rated on a single dimension and the Sensitivity, Responsiveness, and Involvement scales had maladaptive upper bounds (e.g., hyper-sensitivity). As described in Biringen et al. (2014) and Saunders et al. (2015, 2017), the fourth edition of the EAS also provides an “attachment” score ranging from 1 to 100, which allows the mother and child to be assigned to categories of attachment – problematic/ disturbed (1–40), detachment (41–60), complicated (61–80), and emotionally available (81–100). These Emotional Availability Zones (EA-Z), derived from the Emotional Attachment and EA Clinical Screener (EA2-CS; Baker & Biringen, 2012), have only begun to be researched in Western countries (e.g., Baker et al., 2015; Espinet et al., 2013; Frigerio et al., 2019) and therefore are not covered further in this chapter. The EAS have demonstrated reliability and validity. Coders are trained and certified by the authors of the scales (Biringen, 2005). Short-term test-retest reliability has been demonstrated for the third (Bornstein et al., 2006a, b) and fourth editions (Endendijk et al., 2019), as well as cross-setting reliability (i.e., home versus laboratory setting; Bornstein et al., 2006a; b). Long-term stability was demonstrated

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for the third edition (Bornstein et al., 2019; Bornstein & Putnick, 2021). Convergent validity has also been demonstrated for the EAS with other measures of sensitivity, mother-child attachment ratings, and some attachment classifications (Bohr et al., 2018; Ziv et al., 2000).

Cross-Cultural Applicability of the Emotional Availability Scales An underlying assumption of emotional availability is that the constructs being measured are rooted in cultural notions about expressing emotion. Emotional expressions and communications around emotions are embedded within cultural communities’ practices and, therefore, are largely learned and practiced from birth (Harwood & Miller, 1991; Howes & Obregon, 2009; Rogoff, 2003). As a result, the specific behavioral manifestations of the six constructs being assessed may differ across cultures, although the scaling (from lesser to greater) of EA is appropriate in all. The EAS were developed within the U.S. European American culture (Biringen et al., 1998), but they appear to be broadly applicable to other cultures. The EAS have been used in dyads from over 20 countries (Biringen et al., 2014; Easterbrooks & Biringen, 2009). Being rooted in attachment theory (a construct theorized to be universal; Mesman et al., 2016; van Ijzendoorn, 1990), the constructs underlying the EAS (e.g., sensitivity) are likely common across cultures and so the EAS themselves likely apply broadly to parent-child relationships around the globe. Because the EAS are global ratings of the overall climate of the dyad’s interaction, a wide variety of culturally specific behaviors could signify emotional availability. For example, in some cultures, the representation of maternal sensitivity might include physical affection, like hugging and snuggling. In another culture, where physical affection with children is quite rare, a better indicator of maternal sensitivity might be giving extra food or privileges to the child (Dawson, 2018; Oburu & Palmerus, 2003; Whiting & Whiting, 1975). For this reason, the EAS allow for culturally specific behaviors, underscoring the importance of using raters who are fluent in the culture being assessed. If a European American coder attempts to rate the sensitivity of mothers in Kenya, that coder might misrepresent important exchanges that have different meanings in the two cultures.

Intra-cultural Studies of Emotional Availability Studies that formally compare cultures on the EAS are rare. However, the EAS have been used within many different cultures and, although they cannot be directly compared, findings from intra-cultural studies inform the literature about variation throughout the world.

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Western Cultures As is generally true of psychological research (Arnett, 2008; Henrich et al., 2010; Tomlinson et al., 2014), the largest share of EAS studies is based on samples from Western Europe and North America (Biringen et al., 2014). Because of the large number of Western studies, we only briefly summarize this literature. In North American samples, the EAS have been related to a host of positive child characteristics and outcomes including compliance, behavioral adjustment, school readiness, language, play, peer relationships, empathy, self-concept, and prosocial behavior (Biringen et al., 2005; Bornstein et al., 2020; Easterbrooks et al., 2012; Howes & Hong, 2008; Lehman et al., 2002; Moreno et al., 2008; Paulus et al., 2018; Pressman et al., 1999; Robinson & Little, 1994). The EAS are also associated with the child’s neurophysiology, including heart rate variability, cortisol, epigenetic changes, and brain development (Clark et al., 2021). Active research groups are using the EAS in Australia, Italy, Israel, and the Netherlands, and individual studies are emerging from Belgium, Finland, Germany, Latvia, Spain, Sweden, and the Ukraine. The EAS have demonstrated relations with mothers’ personal characteristics and aspects of parenting. For example, the EAS are associated with maternal PTSD symptoms in war trauma asylum-seekers and refugees (van Ee et al., 2012) in the Netherlands. They have been associated with reflective functioning (the ability to understand behavior in terms of underlying mental states) in Sweden (Möller et al., 2017). In Finland, there is an association with maternal prenatal and concurrent representations of parenthood in drug-abusing and non-abusing mothers (Flykt et al., 2012). And in Australia they have been associated with parenting stress and mind-mindedness (a mother’s tendency to frame interactions with her child in terms of the child’s intentions, beliefs, desires, and emotions) (Lok & McMahon, 2006; McMahon & Meins, 2012). The EAS are associated with dyadic attachment security in Israel (Aviezer et al., 1999, 2003; Ziv et al., 2000), Italy (Cassibba et al., 2012), and the Netherlands (van Ijzendoorn et al., 2007). Finally, the EAS are associated with child characteristics such as perceived primary control in Israel (Dan et al., 2011), symbolic play and level of functioning in children with Down Syndrome in Italy (Bentenuto et al., 2020; Venuti et al., 2008), and infant negative temperament (Albers et al., 2007) and later child cognitive development (Stams et al., 2002) in the Netherlands. The EAS have also been found to discriminate clinical (e.g., mentally ill, substance abusing) from nonclinical mothers in Australia (Aran et al., 2022; Newman et al., 2007; Trapolini et al., 2008), Belgium (Vliegen et al., 2009), Finland (Flykt et al., 2012), Germany (Kluczniok et al., 2016; Mielke et al., 2020), Italy (Frigerio et al., 2019), and the United States (Sadeh-Sharvit et al., 2016). The EAS also discriminate clinical (i.e., feeding disordered) and nonclinical children in Germany (Wiefel et al., 2005) and Israel (Atzaba-Poria et al., 2010; Gueron-Sela et al., 2011). Dyadic EA improved in response to parenting interventions in Latvia (Streitule-Pikse et al., 2010), the Netherlands (Stams et al., 2001; van Doesum et al., 2008), and Sweden (Salomonsson & Sandell, 2011a, 2011b). Taken together, these

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findings suggest similar patterns of relations in multiple Western countries that validate the EAS.

Non-Western Cultures The EAS have been used only rarely in non-Western cultures. Due to the smaller body of research, we delve more deeply into the findings in non-Western countries. The little research available suggests that the EAS can be applied to non-Western cultures, and the EAS largely relate in expected ways to other constructs within these cultures. In a review of over 100 published papers that used the EAS, Biringen et al. (2014) reported only two that used non-Western samples (India and South Africa; John et al., 2012; Murray-Kolb & Beard, 2009). Since 2014, the EAS have been applied in at least four more non-Western countries: Zambia, Singapore, Korea, and Japan. Africa. Murray-Kolb and Beard (2009) and Bain (2014) employed the EAS in samples of South African mother-infant dyads. Murray-Kolb and Beard (2009) studied three groups of mothers, recruited 1.5 months after giving birth – mothers with iron deficiency anemia who were supplemented with iron (as well as vitamin C and folic acid; the treatment group), mothers with iron deficiency anemia who were not supplemented with iron (but were supplemented with vitamin C and folic acid; the placebo group), and mothers without iron deficiency anemia (no supplementation; the control group). At 2.5 months post-partum, dyads in the control group scored higher on Maternal Sensitivity and Child Responsiveness than mothers in the treatment and placebo groups. At 9 months post-partum, the treatment group scored similarly to the control group and better than the placebo group on Maternal Sensitivity, Structuring, and Nonhostility, and Child Responsiveness. These results suggested that post-partum iron supplementation prevented a decline in mother-infant emotional availability from 2.5 to 9 months post-partum as was observed in the placebo group. Bain (2014) used the EAS (among other measures) to study the effectiveness of a 12-week group psychotherapy intervention with homeless mother-infant dyads living in shelters in South Africa. Following the intervention, mothers’ Structuring of their infants increased in a dose-response manner (e.g., the more sessions attended, the greater the positive change in Structuring), although no other dimension of interaction changed. The participants in this study were in dire circumstances – homeless, under resourced, and many living with HIV and depression – which may have contributed to the limited change in EAS. In Zambia, Sichimba et al. (2017) observed grandmothers interacting with their 12- to 27-month-old grandchildren and scored the Sensitivity scale of the EAS. Grandmothers also rated their emotions when engaging in grandparenting tasks, and sorted the characteristics of an “ideal mother,” which was then compared to a criterion sensitive mother (using a modified Maternal Behavior Q-Set; Pederson et al., 1999). Grandmothers with more positive emotions toward grandparenting tasks (e.g., feeding, playing, comforting, toilet training, discipline) and who had

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fewer children of their own were more sensitive in their interactions with their grandchildren. However, grandmothers who believed ideal mothering was closer to the criterion sensitive mother had lower observed Sensitivity in interaction with their grandchildren. The authors theorized that asking grandmothers to rate an ideal mother (rather than a grandmother) may have contributed to the negative association between their conception of an ideal mother and their own Sensitivity because mothers and grandmothers have different roles. Asia. A study in India explored associations among emotional availability, attachment security, and child adaptive behavior in 3- to 6-year-old children with intellectual disabilities and their mothers (John et al., 2012). Child emotional availability (the sum of Responsiveness and Involving) was related to attachment security and child adaptive behavior. Maternal emotional availability (the sum of Sensitivity, Structuring, Nonintrusiveness, and Nonhostility) was associated with attachment security, but not with child adaptive behavior. Furthermore, child emotional availability fully mediated the relation between maternal emotional availability and attachment security as well as the relation between child adaptive functioning and attachment security, even though all measures were assessed at the same timepoint. John et al. (2012) suggested that responsiveness to and involving of mothers may be particularly important indicators of attachment security in children with disabilities. Children’s contributions to the emotional availability of interactions were more predictive of attachment security than were those of their mothers. Several studies have emerged from Singapore. Cheung and Elliott (2016) and Cheung (2021) explored the validity of the EAS in four ethnic groups in Singapore (Chinese, Malay, Indian, and Other). Cheung and Elliott (2016) reported strong concurrent validity of the EAS with a Singaporean adaptation of the Maternal Behavior Q-Set (MBSQ; Pederson et al., 1999) but no significant associations between EAS and child (age 4–6 years) vocabulary, nonverbal ability, and teacher-rated or male-peer-rated likeability. Unexpectedly, female-peer-rated likability was negatively associated with several of the EAS, which may be explained by cultural differences in how the EAS are construed. For example, the affective component of sensitivity may have been too strongly weighted in the EAS, making the scales less appropriate for Singapore, where positive affect is not frequently displayed in mother-child interactions. Another possibility is that mothers in Singapore compensate for low peer likability by showing unliked children greater emotional availability. Cheung (2021) assessed concurrent validity of the EAS and a preschool adaptation of the Ainsworth sensitivity scale (Mesman, 2021) in mothers and their preschool-aged children. EAS Sensitivity was only moderately correlated with the Ainsworth sensitivity scale (r = .34) and physical displays of warmth (r = .26). Esposito et al. (2021) explored how language dominance, mother-child synchrony of heart rate variability, and partner emotional availability predicted mother and child emotional availability in 26 English-Mandarin bilingual mothertoddler dyads. Findings indicated that construct associations varied by the language spoken during the play session (English versus Mandarin). The child’s dominance in the tested language was associated with their responsiveness and involving in the play sessions, but maternal EAS varied in their contributions to child EAS

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depending on the language of the play session. Azhari et al. (2020) also used a Singaporean sample to assess how current parenting stress and the parent’s history of care (warmth) or overprotection (control) from their own parents related to fatherchild and mother-child emotional availability with their 2- to 4-year-old children. Parenting stress attributed to having a difficult child predicted mother and father Nonhostility with their toddler, and this effect was moderated by previously experienced maternal overprotection. Specifically, when parenting stress was low, remembering more overprotection (control) was associated with greater Nonhostility (i.e., less hostility). Although this finding seems contrary to the literature, the authors explained that controlling parenting may be viewed as a positive quality in Asian families (Azhari et al., 2020). Several studies using the EAS have also emerged from Korea. Moon (2014) and Moon and Lee (2012) studied the effects of mother-child dyadic emotional availability on teacher-rated preschool adjustment, social skills, and problem behaviors in Korean preschoolers. Emotional availability was associated with higher preschool adjustment and social skills and lower internalizing and externalizing behavior problems. The effects were also mediated by the child’s effortful control. Hence, dyads with higher emotional availability had preschoolers with greater effortful control, which in turn was associated with better preschool adjustment, social skills, and behaviors. The EAS have also been used to study the emotional availability of employed mothers and their 2- to 4-year-old children in Korean childcare centers (Han & Lee, 2010) as well as to predict storytelling styles in preschool children (Min & Lee, 2010). Emotional availability was negatively associated with parenting stress and positively associated with family income (Han & Lee, 2010). Children who told prosocial narratives had higher emotional availability with their mothers, and children who told avoidant/dysregulated narratives had lower emotional availability with their mothers (Min & Lee, 2010). A single, small study from Japan (Suwa et al., 2012) validated the EAS against preschool children’s attachment representations. In dyads with mothers scoring higher in emotional availability the children had more positive and less negative representations of their parents. The intra-cultural studies reported above suggest that the EAS can be applied to Western and non-Western cultures, and they show reasonable convergent and predictive validity with relevant and expectable constructs. These studies also tend to report mean levels for the EAS in the adaptive range for low-risk community samples, and in lower ranges for high-risk or clinical samples. Rohner et al. (2003) estimated that about 75% of parents world-wide are warm and loving to their children and the remaining 25% are at least mildly rejecting of their children. Perhaps the same could be said for emotional availability: when conditions are good enough, mother-child dyads tend to display adaptive levels of mutual emotional availability, but when conditions are poor (due to physical or mental illness, poverty, inadequate social or cognitive resources, etc.) dyads are characterized by less optimal emotional availability. Of course, the severity of these conditions is culturally constructed, and measures of relevant ecological conditions will vary from one culture to another. It is also possible that there are systematic variations in the

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range of emotional availability across cultures when socioeconomic and ecological conditions are held constant. For example, dyads in some cultures may not have interactional styles consistent with high emotional availability. To investigate this possibility, cross-cultural studies of emotional availability are clearly needed.

Cross-Cultural Studies of Emotional Availability Contemporary research casts the ecological perspective as indispensable in developmental study (Bronfenbrenner & Morris, 1998), and one increasingly vital ecological context of development is culture (Bornstein, 1991; Lansford et al., 2021; Rogoff, 1990). Far too much of the research on parent-child relationships is based on single Western European and North American samples, and too many generalizations are made to other cultures based on patterns found in those that are studied. The cross-cultural approach is acknowledged by empiricists and theoreticians alike as requisite to a fuller understanding of developmental processes as well as for testing the limits of generalization (Bornstein, 1991, 2002, 2010, 2022; Brislin, 1983; Nugent et al., 1989; Piaget, 1966/1974; Whiting, 1981). An additional goal of cross-cultural research is to explore and explain cultural similarities and differences in parent-child relationships (Bornstein, 1980; Bornstein & Esposito, 2020; van de Vijver & Leung, 1997). Insufficient research has systematically examined expressions of mutual emotional availability in parent-child dyads by country, even though there have been specific calls for investigations of both cross-country and intracountry variation in EA (Bornstein et al., 2012b; Emde, 2000). Three studies by Bornstein et al. (2008, 2010, 2012a) explored patterns of emotional availability across healthy (non-clinical), demographically matched mother-child dyads in Argentina, Italy, and the United States. The first study (Bornstein, Putnick, et al., 2012) explored emotional availability in mothers with their 5-month-old firstborn children. Seventy dyads resided in Argentina, 70 dyads resided in Italy, and 80 dyads resided in the United States. In these three community samples, most dyads scored in the adaptive range on the EAS, underscoring the commonality among the three cultures being studied. However, Italian mothers were more sensitive and Italian infants more responsive on average than Argentine and U.S. mothers and infants. The three cultural groups did not differ on Maternal Structuring, Nonintrusiveness, or Nonhostility, nor on Child Involving. Moreover, when Sensitivity, Structuring, Responsiveness, and Involving were submitted to a cluster analysis, three clusters emerged. Italian dyads were more likely than expected to be classified as high in emotional availability, and they were less likely than expected to be classified as low in emotional availability. The authors concluded that emotional availability is a culture-common characteristic of mother-infant dyads near the beginning of life, but that it is in some degree moderated by culture. The second study (Bornstein et al., 2008) used the same sample of Argentine, Italian, and U.S. dyads, but explored emotional availability when the children were 20 months old. At this later time point, Italian mothers were more Sensitive and

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optimally Structuring, and Italian children were more Responsive and Involving than Argentine and U.S. dyads. Like at 5 months, dyads from all countries generally scored in the adaptive range on the EAS, but Italian dyads had higher emotional availability than Argentine and U.S. dyads. Finally, in a third study, Bornstein et al. (2010) explored the stability in relative ordering and continuity in mean level of emotional availability in the same three cultural groups from 5 to 20 months. Across all countries, emotional availability was stable (correlated) across time, and country did not moderate stability, indicating that stability was similar across the three cultural groups. Across all three countries, some EAS were continuous (i.e., did not differ) in mean level (Maternal Nonhostility, Child Responsiveness, and Child Involvement) and some decreased in mean level from 5 to 20 months (Maternal Sensitivity, Structuring, and Nonintrusiveness). As with stability, country did not moderate the continuity/discontinuity results, indicating that the same pattern of relations (i.e., mean level continuity in some scales, and decreases in other scales across time) was evident in all three cultures. The reduction in some domains of emotional availability from 5 to 20 months was explained as a (possibly transient) dyadic pattern resulting from the increasing agency of the child at 20 months. For example, being sensitive to and structuring the environment of a non-mobile, non-verbal infant may be an easier task than doing so for an active, mobile, talking toddler, especially for first-time mothers as these were in all samples. Taken together, these three studies suggest that dyads in community samples from three Western, industrialized nations generally score in the adaptive range on the EAS, and the changes in emotional availability from 5 to 20 months followed similar patterns in the three countries despite the fact that, at both 5 and (especially) 20 months, Italian dyads tended to be more emotionally available to one another than dyads in Argentina and the United States. Why might Italian dyads score higher? Here cultural factors come into play. Compared to Argentine and U.S. American cultures, Italian culture places a stronger emphasis on the socioemotional relationship between the mother and child. Italian mothers value and seek “a relationship that is to satisfy the affective needs of the mother and of the child” (Bimbi, 1991, p. 150; see also Venuti & Bornstein, 2022). Compared with U.S. American mothers, Italian mothers typically display higher levels of social/affective and handling/holding behaviors, and they spend more time in synchronous dyadic social exchanges with their infants (Hsu & Lavelli, 2005). Italian dyads are also more likely to openly express affection to each other than are U.S. American dyads during the first 3 months (Hsu & Lavelli, 2005). Axia and Weisner (2002) suggested that Italian mothers prefer socially active and affectively responsive “vivaci” infants, and accordingly, Italian-speaking children say more social words (i.e., names for people and social routines) than English-speaking children (Caselli et al., 1995, 1999). These reported characteristics of Italian mothers and children support the findings that Italian dyads are more emotionally available to one another than the U.S. American and Argentine dyads (Bornstein et al., 2008; Bornstein, Putnick, et al., 2012).

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Is Emotional Availability Culture-Common or Culture-Specific? For any human group, there are emotional ties between mother and child. Therefore, in one large sense, EA is likely a universal aspect of dyadic parent-child relationships. Whether its assessment by the EAS yields a universal picture remains to be seen. At this point in time, converging data suggest a largely cohesive cross-cultural profile. In no individual country reviewed above were non-clinical dyads in the sample rated as low in average emotional availability; when country or culture means were reported, all scores were above the mid-point of the scale, except for two samples of clinically depressed mothers (van Doesum et al., 2008; Vliegen et al., 2009). Furthermore, the advantages found for Italian dyads in the studies by Bornstein et al. (2008, 2012a, b) were small, and most dyads in all three countries had scores in the adaptive range. Of course, the emotional availability of dyads varies within and across countries, but we would expect few large systematic differences in average levels across cultures in demographically matched samples. More support for the culturally common applicability of the EAS comes from evidence for concurrent and predictive validity. The EAS have been similarly associated with other meaningful indicators of parenting, child development, and parent-child relationships in many countries. For example, the relations of the EAS with attachment security in the United States, Canada, India, Israel, Italy, Japan, and the Netherlands suggest that similar processes are generally at work in each country to produce healthy mother-child relationships. Bornstein et al. (2010) also found that the EAS changed similarly across infancy in Argentina, Italy, and the United States, suggesting that developmental trajectories may evolve similarly across cultures. Here again, expanded study of non-Western samples will be extremely valuable and enlightening.

Summary and Conclusions Although the literature on cross-cultural differences in emotional availability is still scant, there is preliminary evidence to suggest that the EAS are broadly applicable and similarly predictive across a wide range of cultures. It is possible that the file drawer problem (Rosenthal, 1979) is at work, meaning that studies where the EAS are not predictive or significantly different across cultures are not being published. However, since evidence of cross-cultural similarities is generally considered to be at least as interesting as support for cross-cultural differences, it is likely (and hoped) that these reports will also be chosen for publication when the studies are of high quality. Based on this review of the literature, we recommend several next steps. First, the EAS should be applied to dyads in diverse non-Western cultures. Particularly lacking are Asian and African samples, where mothers may have different

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interactive styles with their infants and young children than do Western mothers (Putnick et al., 2012; Rubin & Chung, 2006). Employing the EAS in remote cultures (e.g., Amazonian, Eskimo) would also test the limits of generalizability of the scales. Second, studies of dyads with different predominant family structures (e.g., extended families, village settings) and dyads in various living conditions (e.g., extreme poverty, high infant mortality) are needed to understand the full scope of emotional availability across the world. Finally, more cross-cultural studies are needed to directly compare the functioning of dyads living in similar conditions across cultural groups. Only in this way will we come to understand the role that emotional availability plays as parents strive to prepare their children for productive and successful lives in diverse cultural settings. With a broader cross-cultural base, the culturally common and culturally specific aspects of emotional availability can be more fully understood and appreciated. Author Note This research was supported by the Intramural Research Program of the NIH, NICHD.

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Diane L. Putnick is a developmental psychologist and staff scientist with the Epidemiology Branch of the Division of Population Health Research at the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development. Dr. Putnick holds a B.A. from the University of Delaware and a Ph.D. from the George Washington University. Her research interests include child development and parenting across diverse contexts. Marc H. Bornstein is affiliated with the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, the Institute for Fiscal Studies, and UNICEF. He holds a B.A. from Columbia College, M.S. and Ph.D. degrees from Yale University, and honorary doctorates from the Universities of Padua and Trento and is Honorary Professor at Heidelberg University. He is founding editor of the journal, Parenting: Science and Practice. His research interests include parenting and child development across diverse contexts. Joan T. D. Suwalsky is a developmental psychologist retired from the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development. She holds a B.A. in Child Study from Vassar College and an M.A. in Human Development and Family Studies from Cornell University. Her research interests include early parent–child interaction and socio-emotional development, with a special interest in these areas as they apply to adoptive families.

Parents’ Aggression Toward Children and Children’s Own Aggression Jennifer E. Lansford

The topic of parenting and aggression can be approached from two main perspectives. The first involves understanding parents’ aggression toward children. The second involves understanding how parenting is related to children’s own aggression. This chapter will be organized around these two central perspectives, defining aggression as behavior that is intended to hurt someone else. As in other domains of psychological research (Thalmayer et al., 2021), research on aggression has been conducted primarily using North American and Western European samples. For example, in Archer’s (2004) meta-analysis of gender differences in aggression, 73% of studies included participants only from the United States, an additional 17% of studies included participants from Canada or the United Kingdom, and only 10% of studies included participants from other countries (and only 2% of these studies included participants from low- or middle-income countries). Likewise, in Card, Stucky, Sawalani, and Little’s (2008) meta-analysis, 70% of the studies were conducted in the United States, 15% in Canada or the United Kingdom, and 15% in all other countries (primarily Australia, Finland, and Germany). Therefore, much of the literature summarized in this chapter draws on samples that are not representative of the world’s population, but when studies from countries that have been underrepresented in the research literature are available, an effort has been made to include them.

J. E. Lansford (*) Duke University, Durham, NC, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_20

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Parents’ Aggression Toward Children Definitions of Parents’ Aggression Studies of parents’ aggression toward children have focused primarily on physical aggression in the context of corporal punishment or physical abuse. Historically (see Whipple & Richey, 1997), and in some countries today, researchers, policymakers, and parents try to distinguish between corporal punishment and physical abuse. Corporal punishment has been defined as a behavior that is meant to cause physical pain but not injury for the purpose of correcting a child’s misbehavior, whereas abuse is sometimes defined as leaving marks, bruises, or injuries (Straus, 1994). However, corporal punishment and physical abuse have similar detrimental effects on child development (Gershoff et al., 2018). From a human rights perspective, the United Nations (2017) does not distinguish corporal punishment from physical abuse, as all are a violation of children’s right to protection from violence. Although more research has focused on parents’ physical aggression toward children than other forms of aggression, studies that have examined verbal and psychological aggression suggest that these also are problems worthy of attention. The United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF, 2009) has defined yelling and other harsh verbal discipline as psychologically aggressive toward children and has included both physical and other forms of aggression as violations of children’s rights to protection from harsh treatment. Attempts to reduce parents’ aggression toward children should include all forms of aggression, not just physical forms.

Cultural Differences in Parents’ Aggression Toward Children Cultures differ in the extent to which they tolerate, or even encourage, parents’ aggression toward children. In a study of parents’ childrearing discipline and violence in 24 low- and middle-income countries (Lansford & Deater-Deckard, 2012), 27–38% of the variance in mothers’ belief that it is necessary to use corporal punishment to rear their 2- to 4-year-old child properly was accounted for by the mothers’ country of residence. The range of beliefs was wide. For example, only 4% of mothers in Albania reported believing that it was necessary to use corporal punishment to rear their child properly, whereas 93% of mothers in Syria reported holding this belief. Reported behaviors also varied widely across countries. For example, 28% of mothers in Belize compared to 84% of mothers in Jamaica reported that someone in their household had responded to the child with physical aggression in the last month. Across countries, there was a disconnect between mothers’ beliefs and behaviors, with a greater proportion of mothers reporting that someone in their household had responded to the child with physical aggression than reporting that they believed corporal punishment was necessary to rear the child. In addition to large variability across countries in parents’ use of physical aggression toward

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children and belief in its necessity, there was also variability across countries in parents’ use of psychological aggression toward children. For example, 7% of mothers in Albania reported that someone in their household had yelled at the child or called the child a name such as lazy or stupid in the last month, compared to 89% of mothers in Yemen. Country of residence accounted for 14–19% of the variance in mothers’ reports of psychological aggression toward their children. Differences across countries in parents’ aggression toward children were predictable from social-demographic features of the countries. In particular, mothers in countries that were higher on the Human Development Index (United Nations Development Programme, 2007), which reflects longer life expectancy, higher school enrollment and literacy, and higher gross domestic product, were less likely to report using psychological and physical aggression toward their children than were mothers in countries that were lower on these social-demographic indicators (Lansford & Deater-Deckard, 2012). One explanation for this relation is that as parents progress through formal education systems, their beliefs and attitudes change in a way that is more supportive of autonomy and reasoning rather than mere obedience from children (Davis-Kean et al., 2021). These beliefs in turn might promote parents’ use of inductive forms of discipline such as offering explanations rather than psychological and physical aggression that might gain the child’s immediate compliance but also lead to unintended negative consequences. Thus, beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors vary at the level of individual families as well as at the level of entire countries. These beliefs are sometimes translated into explicit laws and policies. In 1979, Sweden became the first country to legally ban parents’ use of corporal punishment of children. Since the Swedish legal prohibition, 62 additional countries have legally banned the use of corporal punishment in all settings, including at home as of September 2022 (www.endcorporalpunishment. org). A longitudinal study tracking parents’ use of corporal punishment over time found a more precipitous decline in corporal punishment after a legal ban was passed in Kenya than in six comparison countries in which legal bans were not passed during the comparison period (Alampay et al., 2021). Legal prohibitions of corporal punishment have in large part been motivated by the United Nations (1989) Convention on the Rights of the Child (CRC), which has been ratified by all countries in the world except the United States. The CRC outlines three rights of children across the world: the right to survival and development, the right to participate in decisions that affect their lives, and, most relevant to the present discussion, the right to protection from abuse and exploitation (Jones & Welch, 2010). The right to protection extends not only to extreme forms of abuse and exploitation such as forcing children into slavery, hard labor, or serving as soldiers but to corporal punishment in the home. The CRC position is that violence against children, even if it is a spanking framed as “discipline,” is never justified and is a violation of children’s right to protection (Pinheiro, 2006). The United Nations has continued to prioritize child protection in the Sustainable Development Goals guiding the international agenda through 2030 (United Nations, 2017). Each of 17 goals is operationalized with specific, measurable targets. Sustainable Development Goals Target 16.2 is to “End abuse, exploitation, trafficking

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and all forms of violence against and torture of children.” Countries’ progress toward this goal has been operationalized as the percentage of children aged 1 to 17 who experienced any corporal punishment or psychological aggression (e.g., calling the child lazy, stupid, or other insults) by caregivers in the past month (Danish Institute for Human Rights, 2018). In addition to passing legal bans to try to abolish or reduce parents’ use of corporal punishment of children, many countries have implemented parenting programs that attempt to change parents’ attitudes about the appropriateness of corporal punishment and provide them with alternate discipline strategies. For example, the Positive Discipline in Everyday Parenting program implemented in at least 30 countries attempts to reduce parent to child aggression by shifting parents’ perspectives of childrearing from an orientation grounded in control, coercion, and punishment to one grounded in mutual respect and collaborative problem solving (Durrant, 2020). Likewise, Parenting for Lifelong Health is a parenting program geared toward child protection that has been developed and adapted for use in at least 20 low-and middleincome countries, with results of randomized controlled trials demonstrating that the program reduces parents’ aggression toward children (e.g., Ward et al., 2020). In contrast to legal prohibitions against parents’ aggression toward children in some cultures, other cultures tolerate and even encourage it. For example, the “spare the rod, spoil the child” philosophy has been endorsed by some conservative Protestant religious groups. These beliefs might account for the higher rates of corporal punishment of children reported by parents with these religious affiliations (e.g., Baptist, Pentecostal) than other religious affiliations (e.g., Catholic, Methodist, Presbyterian; Gershoff et al., 1999). An intervention randomly assigned students at a conservative Christian university to an intervention that provided scientific evidence about the detrimental effects of corporal punishment on children, a reinterpretation of “spare the rod, spoil the child” biblical passages plus scientific evidence, or a control group. They found that endorsement of corporal punishment decreased the most in the group provided with both scientific evidence and the biblical reinterpretation, suggesting the importance of addressing parents’ motivations for corporal punishment in attempts to decrease its use (Perrin et al., 2017). Several examples illustrate how a given parenting behavior may serve the same or different functions depending on the cultural context in which it is situated (Bornstein, 2012). Likewise depending on context, different parenting behaviors may serve the same or different functions. For example, folk remedies such as coining and cupping can leave marks on children’s skin that appear to be the result of physical abuse but were inflicted with the intention of healing the child (Lupariello et al., 2020). The intended function of these parenting behaviors depends on the cultural context in which they are enacted. Parenting practices sometimes become problematic in one cultural context even though they are not considered problematic in other contexts, such as when a parent immigrates to a new country and continues to engage in parenting behaviors that were acceptable in the country of origin but are considered abusive in the country of destination (Alaazi et al., 2018). However, it is important not to take too extreme a position on cultural relativism. Just because a practice is normative and accepted within a cultural group does not

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automatically make the practice acceptable. There are forms of aggression against children that have been condemned by the international community, despite their prevalence in and acceptance by certain cultural groups (Obiora et al., 2020). Parents’ rights to rear their children in a manner consistent with cultural traditions must be balanced with children’s rights to protection from abuse.

Relations Between Parents’ Aggression and Children’s Adjustment An extensive body of research now demonstrates that both corporal punishment and physical abuse contribute to a range of child behavioral, emotional, and social problems (e.g., Gershoff & Grogan-Kaylor, 2016). Physical abuse is a widelyacknowledged risk factor for the development of a number of problems during childhood, adolescence, and into adulthood (Lansford et al., 2021). More controversial has been whether corporal punishment is also a risk factor for the development of such problems. One argument has been that links between corporal punishment and children’s behavior problems can be accounted for largely by child effects. For example, aggressive children elicit more corporal punishment from their parents than do nonaggressive children. They also receive more of any form of discipline, including “positive” forms such as time-outs, which will be related to more child behavior problems because children who misbehave elicit more of all kinds of discipline from their parents (Larzelere et al., 2020). Nevertheless, in the majority of studies that have attempted to address these questions about child effects (e.g., in longitudinal studies that control for initial levels of child behavior problems), corporal punishment is still found to predict an increase in child adjustment problems over time (Berlin et al., 2009; Lansford et al., 2011). In a meta-analysis of 111 effect sizes from studies of 160,927 children, 99% of significant effects demonstrated an adverse effect of corporal punishment on child development, with no significant differences in effects based on whether corporal punishment was defined as physical abuse (Gershoff & Grogan-Kaylor, 2016). Parents’ corporal punishment of children was associated with more child aggression, antisocial behavior, externalizing problems, internalizing problems, mental health problems, negative relationships with parents, and impaired cognitive ability, as well as with less moral internalization, lower self-esteem, and risk for physical abuse from parents. Adults who had been spanked as children had more mental health problems, antisocial behavior, and positive attitudes about spanking. Given wide differences across countries and cultural groups in beliefs and behaviors related to parents’ aggression toward children, it makes sense to consider whether the effects of aggression toward children depend on the cultural context in which it is used. In a study of mothers’ use of corporal punishment in China, India, Italy, Kenya, the Philippines, and Thailand, more frequent use of corporal punishment was related to more child aggression and anxiety in all six countries (Lansford

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et al., 2005). However, normativeness of corporal punishment (operationalized as perceptions of how frequently other parents in the community used corporal punishment and the aggregate across the sample within a country of mothers’ reports of how frequently they used corporal punishment) moderated the link between mothers’ use of corporal punishment and child aggression and anxiety. The link was weaker in countries in which the use of corporal punishment was more normative than in countries in which the use of corporal punishment was not normative (Lansford et al., 2005). Yet, despite finding that for a given child, the link between corporal punishment and that child’s aggression and anxiety is weaker if corporal punishment is culturally normative, cultures in which the use of corporal punishment is normative have higher levels of societal violence overall than do cultures in which the use of corporal punishment is not normative (Ember & Ember, 2005; Lansford & Dodge, 2008). One explanation is that if children perceive that corporal punishment is widely accepted within their cultural group, then being corporally punished may not signify to children that they are being rejected by their parents or treated in an unduly harsh way. Therefore, children who are corporally punished in this context in which corporal punishment is normative may not behave more aggressively than other children in that context who are not corporally punished. However, all of the children in the society may internalize cultural norms regarding the appropriateness of corporal punishment and generalize them to the acceptability of using physical aggression to solve problems in other domains of life, resulting in higher levels of societal violence. Parents’ verbal aggression also has been found to relate to negative child outcomes (e.g., Derella et al., 2020). In a study of mothers and children in China, India, the Philippines, and Thailand, children’s perceptions of mothers’ hostility mediated the relation between mothers’ verbal aggression and children’s anxiety and aggression (Lansford et al., 2010). Children were more likely to perceive mothers’ verbal aggression as indicating hostility toward the child in countries where the use of verbal aggression was less normative. Thus, there is evidence that parents use a variety of forms of aggression toward their children, that parents’ aggression toward children is related to negative child outcomes, and that parents’ aggression is situated within broader cultural contexts that vary in their acceptance of aggression.

Children’s Aggression Negative and Positive Parenting and Children’s Aggression Turning now from the first main perspective in understanding parenting and aggression from the standpoint of parents’ aggression toward children, a second main perspective from which to approach the topic of parenting and aggression involves understanding how parenting is related to children’s own aggression. These two perspectives are closely linked because parents’ aggression toward children is highly predictive of children’s own aggression. Several theoretical models of the

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development of aggression and a large body of empirical evidence describe the importance of parents in the developmental origins of children’s aggression. For example, basic social learning models describe how behaviors are modeled and learned in the context of social interactions (Bandura, 1977). Thus, parents who themselves behave aggressively teach their children that aggression is an acceptable behavior, and children thereby learn to behave aggressively through their parents’ modeling. Patterson’s (1982) theory regarding the development of aggression emphasizes the importance of coercive exchanges between parents and children over time in the genesis of aggressive behavior. These coercive exchanges are bidirectional processes. For example, a child might begin by making a request of the parent (e.g., candy at the grocery store). In a prototypical exchange, the parent refuses the child’s initial request, and the child then escalates the request (whining or crying). The parent may then escalate the refusal (using a harsh tone or yelling at the child). This pattern of increasingly aversive parent and child behaviors continues until either the parent gives in (thus reinforcing the child’s aversive behavior and making it more likely that the child will throw temper tantrums or behave in other undesired ways in the future) or until the child stops making requests (sometimes because the interaction has escalated to the point of aggression from the parent toward the child). Patterson has cited this type of coercive exchange as being one of the main mechanisms through which children’s antisocial and aggressive behavior develops. Psychological control is another aspect of parenting that has been implicated in the development of children’s aggression (Yan et al., 2020). Psychological control has been defined in terms of manipulation and intrusion into children’s emotional and cognitive world through behaviors such as invalidating children’s feelings and pressuring them to think in particular ways (Scharf & Goldner, 2018). Parents’ psychological control may increase children’s emotion regulation problems, which in turn increase the risk of aggressive behavior (Scharf & Goldner, 2018). Although problematic parenting has been linked to the development of children’s aggression, positive parenting can prevent or reduce children’s aggression. For example, parental responsiveness, nurturance, warmth, and acceptance represent several positive aspects of parenting that are related to less child aggression. These positive aspects of parenting are captured in several theoretical perspectives. From an attachment framework, parents who are responsive to their infants engender feelings of trust and security by conveying to infants that their needs will be met (e.g., Fraley & Shaver, 2021). Security in the parent-child relationship has then been found to relate to children’s more socially competent and less aggressive future behavior. In Interpersonal Acceptance-Rejection Theory, the most important predictor of children’s adjustment is their perception that they are loved and accepted, rather than rejected, by their parents (Rohner & Lansford, 2017). Even parental playfulness has been related to less aggressive behavior in children (AmodiaBidakowska et al., 2020). Many preventive interventions for children at risk for the development of aggression and treatment interventions for children who already behave aggressively hinge on the idea that changes in parenting can lead to changes in children’s aggression.

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Therefore, some interventions attempt to effect change in children’s aggression indirectly via change in parenting behavior. Parenting behaviors often targeted in such interventions include reducing parents’ use of corporal punishment and increasing parents’ consistent use of non-punitive forms of discipline, warmth, supervision, and positive engagement with the child. For example, the New Beginnings program is a group-based intervention for divorced parents and their children that reduces corporal punishment as well as child aggressive behavior problems (Sandler et al., 2020). In a different risk context, Functional Family Therapy provides approximately 30 hours of intervention with families of juveniles at risk of institutionalization because of violent behavior; juveniles whose families were randomly assigned to the intervention group had lower rates of recidivism compared to juveniles whose families were randomly assigned to the control group (Thornberry et al., 2018).

Social Information Processing Mechanisms Parenting styles and practices have thus been shown to relate to children’s aggressive behavior. But what proximal mechanisms account for how parenting affects children’s aggression? Social information processing theory provides one explanation of the possible mechanism. According to this theory (Crick & Dodge, 1994), through repeated exposure to parents’ aggression, especially in the case of children who are physically abused, children come to process social information in biased ways that contribute to their own future aggression (Dodge et al., 1990). First, physically abused children encode social cues in a biased way, taking in more information about threatening cues than about non-threatening cues. Second, physically abused children develop hostile attribution biases in which they become likely to perceive ambiguous social cues as involving hostile intent (e.g., a negative outcome being the result of someone’s desire to hurt them or be mean rather than the result of an accident or benign cause). Third, physically abused children access aggressive responses to social situations more readily than nonaggressive responses. For example, when faced with provocation or exclusion by peers, physically abused children are more likely to generate responses that include physical or verbal retaliation than responses that involve discussion, assertiveness without aggression, or other prosocial behaviors. Fourth, compared to children who have not been physically abused, children who have been physically abused evaluate aggression more positively, believing that it is acceptable to use aggression and that it will lead to desired outcomes. These biased ways of processing social information have been found to mediate the relation between children’s experience of physical abuse and their subsequent aggressive behavior (Heleniak & McLaughlin, 2020). That is, physical abuse increases children’s mis-encoding of social cues, making hostile attributions, accessing of aggressive responses, and evaluating aggression positively. In turn, these biases increase the likelihood that children will behave aggressively in the future. It is important to note that within the context of a relationship with a

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physically abusive parent, these biased ways of processing information might be adaptive for the child, by helping the child recognize hostile cues that could indicate the parent escalating into an abusive episode and thereby enabling the child to escape if possible. However, in social interactions with peers or nonaggressive adults, these biases are maladaptive because they cause the child to perceive harm where none was intended and deprive children of a full range of nonaggressive behavioral responses to difficult social situations.

Forms and Functions of Children’s Aggression Although links between parenting and children’s aggression have been examined primarily in relation to children’s physical aggression, the literature on children’s aggression describes several different forms and functions of aggression. For example, aggression can take not only physical but also direct verbal (insulting other children or calling them names) and also indirect forms (relational aggression that inflicts harm by damaging social relationships through spreading unkind rumors or excluding another child from the peer group) (Coyne & Ostrov, 2018). Physical and relational aggression appear to have the same factor structure across diverse cultural contexts (Lansford et al., 2012). Furthermore, aggression can serve either proactive (obtaining a desired object) or reactive (retaliating in response to a perceived threat) functions (e.g., Fite et al., 2021). Distinctions between reactive and proactive aggression are important because these two types of aggression have different developmental precursors and consequences (Wrangham, 2018). Reactive aggression is associated with an earlier age of onset than is proactive aggression (Dodge et al., 1997). Precursors of reactive aggression include a developmental history of physical maltreatment (Dodge et al., 1997), peer rejection (Evans et al., 2019), more reactive temperament (Vitaro et al., 2002), and physiologic overarousal (Scarpa & Raine, 1997). Researchers have suggested several mechanisms through which these precursors could affect subsequent reactive aggression. For example, Shields and Cicchetti (1998) proposed that maltreatment increases attention deficits and emotion dysregulation, which in turn increase children’s reactive aggression. Indeed, interventions to reduce hostile attributions in the face of ambiguous or benign social stimuli have been found to reduce reactive aggression (Van Bockstaele et al., 2020). In contrast, precursors of proactive aggression include making fewer distinctions between moral and conventional transgressions (Jambon & Smetana, 2018), friendships with other proactively aggressive children (Poulin & Boivin, 2000), and physiologic underarousal (Scarpa & Raine, 1997). Unlike the hostile attribution biases associated with reactive aggression, proactive aggression is associated with evaluating aggression positively (Smithmyer et al., 2000) and holding instrumental (obtaining a toy) rather than relational (becoming friends) goals in social interactions (Crick & Dodge, 1996). Thus, different aspects of parenting may be related to different forms and functions of aggression.

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Culture, Parenting, and Children’s Aggression Although research on parenting as a predictor of children’s aggressive behavior has primarily used samples from the United States, Canada, and western Europe, a growing body of research has documented similarities and differences in how parenting is related to children’s aggression in different cultural contexts. For example, in a study of bidirectional relations between parenting and children’s behavior problems (including aggressive behaviors) in China, Colombia, Italy, Jordan, Kenya, the Philippines, Sweden, Thailand, and the United States, lower warmth and higher control predicted more child behavior problems. Particularly as children moved into adolescence, their behavior problems predicted less parental warmth and more control across cultural contexts (Lansford et al., 2018). Likewise, more cultural similarities than differences were found in a meta-analysis of associations between authoritative parenting (as opposed to authoritarian parenting) and child externalizing problems (Pinquart & Kauser, 2018). Despite these general similarities across cultures, a given parenting behavior may also have different implications for children’s aggressive behavior depending on the cultural context in which the family is situated. For example, as described above, the strength of association between parents’ use of corporal punishment and children’s aggression in six countries was moderated by the cultural normativeness of corporal punishment (Lansford et al., 2005). Therefore, it is important to understand forms of parenting as well as their functions within specific cultural contexts (Bornstein, 2012). Just as cultures differ in the extent to which they tolerate parents’ aggression toward children, cultures also differ in the extent to which they tolerate children’s aggression. For example, externalizing behaviors may be perceived as more disruptive and serious in some cultural contexts than in others (Chen, 2020). For example, in the cultural context of Thailand, a predominantly Buddhist country with cultural sanctions against physically harming any living thing and where group harmony and collectivism are emphasized (Weisz et al., 2006), undercontrolled behaviors such as aggression are more disruptive to society and less tolerated than they are in the United States, providing a socialization context for children in which such behaviors appear less likely to develop.

Conclusions This chapter had two main foci: parents’ aggression toward children and parenting behaviors related to children’s own aggression. Parents’ aggression toward children takes the form of corporal punishment and physical abuse as well as verbal and other non-physical forms. There are nuances across cultural contexts in the meaning that particular parenting practices hold for parents and children and, in turn, the

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implications of these practices for children’s adjustment, but parents’ aggression toward children is related to negative child outcomes across cultural contexts. Children’s own aggression is predicted by a variety of negative parenting practices such as coercive discipline and psychological control as well as by a lack of positive parenting practices such as warmth and responsiveness. The international community, through the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, Sustainable Development Goals, and country-specific laws, is increasingly focused on eliminating parents’ violence toward children, and interventions designed to reduce children’s aggression often hinge on altering parenting.

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Lansford, J. E., Criss, M. M., Laird, R. D., Shaw, D. S., Pettit, G. S., Bates, J. E., & Dodge, K. A. (2011). Reciprocal relations between parents’ physical discipline and children’s externalizing behavior during middle childhood and adolescence. Development and Psychopathology, 23, 225–238. Lansford, J. E., Skinner, A. T., Sorbring, E., di Giunta, L., Deater-Deckard, K., Dodge, K. A., Malone, P. S., Oburu, P., Pastorelli, C., Tapanya, S., Uribe Tirado, L. M., Zelli, A., Al-Hassan, S. M., Alampay, L. P., Bacchini, D., Bombi, A. S., Bornstein, M. H., & Chang, L. (2012). Boys’ and girls’ relational and physical aggression in nine countries. Aggressive Behavior, 38, 298–308. Lansford, J. E., Rothenberg, W. A., Jensen, T. M., Lippold, M. A., Bacchini, D., Bornstein, M. H., Chang, L., Deater-Deckard, K., Di Giunta, L., Dodge, K. A., Malone, P. S., Oburu, P., Pastorelli, C., Skinner, A. T., Sorbring, E., Steinberg, L., Tapanya, S., Uribe Tirado, L. M., Alampay, L. P., & Al-Hassan, S. M. (2018). Bidirectional relations between parenting and behavior problems from age 8 to 13 in nine countries. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 28, 571–590. Lansford, J. E., Godwin, J., Dodge, K. A., McMahon, R. J., Crowley, M., Pettit, G. S., Bates, J. E., & Coie, J. D. (2021). Early physical abuse and adult outcomes. Pediatrics, 147(1), e20200873. Larzelere, R. E., Gunnoe, M. L., Roberts, M. W., Lin, H., & Ferguson, C. J. (2020). Causal evidence for exclusively positive parenting and for timeout: Rejoinder to Holden, GroganKaylor, Durrant, and Gershoff (2017). Marriage and Family Review, 56, 287–319. Lupariello, F., Coppo, E., Cavecchia, I., Bosco, C., Bonaccurso, L., Urbino, A., & Di Vella, G. (2020). Differential diagnosis between physical maltreatment and cupping practices in a suspected child abuse case. Forensic Science, Medicine and Pathology, 16, 188–190. Obiora, O. L., Maree, J. E., & Nkosi-Mafutha, N. G. (2020). Experiences of young women who underwent female genital mutilation/cutting. Journal of Clinical Nursing, 29, 4104–4115. Patterson, G. R. (1982). Coercive family process. Castalia. Perrin, R., Miller-Perrin, C., & Song, J. (2017). Changing attitudes about spanking using alternative biblical interpretations. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 41, 514–522. Pinheiro, P. S. (2006). World report on violence against children. United Nations. Pinquart, M., & Kauser, R. (2018). Do the associations of parenting styles with behavior problems and academic achievement vary by culture? Results from a meta-analysis. Cultural Diversity and Ethnic Minority Psychology, 24, 75–100. Poulin, F., & Boivin, M. (2000). The role of proactive and reactive aggression in the formation and development of boys’ friendships. Developmental Psychology, 36, 233–240. Rohner, R. P., & Lansford, J. E. (2017). Deep structure of the human affectional system: Introduction to interpersonal acceptance-rejection theory. Journal of Family Theory & Review, 9, 426–440. Sandler, I., Wolchik, S., Mazza, G., Gunn, H., Tein, J.-Y., Berkel, C., Jones, S., & Porter, M. (2020). Randomized effectiveness trial of the new beginnings program for divorced families with children and adolescents. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 49, 60–78. Scarpa, A., & Raine, A. (1997). Psychophysiology of anger and violent behavior. Psychiatric Clinics of North America, 20, 375–394. Scharf, M., & Goldner, L. (2018). “If you really love me, you will do/be. . .”: Parental psychological control and its implications for children’s adjustment. Developmental Review, 49, 16–30. Shields, A., & Cicchetti, D. (1998). Reactive aggression among maltreated children: The contributions of attention and emotion dysregulation. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 27, 381–395. Smithmyer, C. M., Hubbard, J. A., & Simons, R. F. (2000). Proactive and reactive aggression in delinquent adolescents: Relations to aggression outcome expectancies. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 29, 86–93. Straus, M. A. (1994). Beating the devil out of them: Corporal punishment in American families. Lexington Books.

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Thalmayer, A. G., Toscanelli, C., & Arnett, J. J. (2021). The neglected 95% revisited: Is American psychology becoming less American? American Psychologist, 76(1), 116–129. Thornberry, T. P., Kearley, B., Gottfredson, D. C., Slothower, M. P., Devlin, D. N., & Fader, J. J. (2018). Reducing crime among youth at risk for gang involvement: A randomized trial. Criminology & Public Policy, 17, 953–989. United Nations. (1989). United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, Geneva. Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights. Retrieved from www.unhchr.ch/ html/menu3/b/k2crc.htm United Nations. (2017). Sustainable Development Goals: 17 goals to transform our world. Retrieved from www.un.org/sustainabledevelopment/sustainable-development-goals/ United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF). (2009). Progress for children: A report card on child protection. UNICEF. United Nations Development Programme. (2007). Human development reports. Retrieved July 10, 2009, from http://hdr.undp.org/en/statistics/indices/hdi Van Bockstaele, B., van der Molen, M. J., Nieuwenhuijzen, M., & Salemink, E. (2020). Modification of hostile attribution bias reduces self-reported reactive aggressive behavior in adolescents. Journal of Experimental Child Psychology, 194, 104811. Vitaro, F., Brendgen, M., & Tremblay, R. E. (2002). Reactively and proactively aggressive children: Antecedent and subsequent characteristics. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 43, 495–505. Ward, C. L., Wessels, I. M., Lachman, J. M., Hutchings, J., Cluver, L. D., Kassanjee, R., Nhapi, R., Little, F., & Gardner, F. (2020). Parenting for Lifelong Health for young children: A randomized controlled trial of a parenting program in South Africa to prevent harsh parenting and child conduct problems. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 61, 503–512. Weisz, J. R., Weiss, B., Suwanlert, S., & Chaiyasit, W. (2006). Testing the syndromal sensitivity model: Culture and psychopathology in Thai and American adolescents. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74, 1098–1107. Whipple, E. E., & Richey, C. A. (1997). Crossing the line from physical discipline to child abuse: How much is too much? Child Abuse & Neglect, 21, 431–444. Wrangham, R. W. (2018). Two types of aggression in human evolution. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 115, 245–253. Yan, F., Zhang, Q., Ran, G., Li, S., & Niu, X. (2020). Relationship between parental psychological control and problem behaviors in youths: A three-level meta-analysis. Children and Youth Services Review, 112, 104900.

Jennifer E. Lansford is a Research Professor in the Sanford School of Public Policy and Director of the Center for Child and Family Policy at Duke University in Durham, NC, USA. Dr. Lansford’s research focuses on the development of aggression and other behavior problems in children and adolescents, with an emphasis on how parents and peers contribute to or protect against these outcomes in diverse cultural contexts. She leads the Parenting Across Cultures project, a longitudinal study of children, mothers, and fathers in nine countries.

Grandparenting Barbara H. Settles

Introduction There are not as many grandparents and great grandparents at the time of this revision in 2022 as we might have expected a decade ago. The worldwide COVID-19 pandemic was especially harsh for older people and reached out to many societies all over the globe. Other problems, such as opioid and other substance abuse, hunger, poverty, and disease have affected different regions to further challenge grandparents and their family networks. In 2019, the estimates for the world’s population growth focused on the aging “. . .with the age group over 65 and older growing the fastest.” (World Population Prospects 2019). The countries with the highest projected population growth to 2050 were, in descending order, India, Nigeria, Pakistan, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Ethiopia, the United Republic of Tanzania, Indonesia, Egypt and the United States of America, with India projected to surpass China as the most populous by 2027. Grandparents are more likely than in past eras to be available over longer periods to their grandchildren. “Despite popular belief to the contrary the widespread experience of grandparenthood is a recent phenomenon” (Hoff, 2007, 643). Life expectancy had gone up rapidly since the middle of the twentieth century. In most regions of the world life expectancy is over 70 years and only in Africa is it less than 60 (World Population Prospects, 2006). “Quite a few live to see their great-grandchildren growing up” (Hoff, 2007, 644). More children have significant interaction and longer-term relationships with many more elder family members including grandparents, great-grandparents and these elders’ siblings and their spouses, the great aunts and uncles.

B. H. Settles (*) Human Development and Family Sciences, University of Delaware, Newark, DE, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_21

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The morbidity and mortality impacts on both generations were coupled with later and less childbearing in the younger generation. The estimates for number of persons aged 80 years and or over was projected to triple from 143 million in 2019 to 426 million in 2050. At the time of the study there were estimated to be more elderly persons than children in the world (World Population Prospects, 2019). Since 1950, annual declines of that magnitude had only been observed on rare occasions, such as Cambodia in the 1970s, Rwanda in the 1990s, and possibly some sub-Saharan African nations at the peak of the AIDS pandemic (Heuveline, 2022). Heuveline has estimated the global and national declines in life expectancies from COVID-19 in the last 2 years decline from 2019 to 2020 at .92 year and it was the first decline since 1950–the first year the United Nations estimated the world’s life expectancy. The global life expectancy was estimated by his calculations to have dropped to the 2013 level in 2021. In 2018, for the first time in history, persons aged 65 or above outnumbered children under 5 years of age globally. The number of persons aged 80 years or over is projected to triple, from 143 million in 2019 to 426 million in 2050. Many developing countries, in North Africa, in Asia, Latin America and the Caribbean, are projected to double the population over 65 by 2050. The Covid Coalition estimated in December 2021, 167,000 children in the United States had lost a primary caregiver (Span, 2022). Some grandparents had primary care of their grandchildren before and during the epidemic. For many families the activities of grandparents with grandchildren increased when parents were working extra hours because of COVID-19. Some grandparents found themselves needing to care for grandchildren while their parent(s) were ill, and, if those parents died, often grandparents continued to care for their grandchildren. Some grandparents have chosen to be part of a family/friendship pod/circle that saw each other, but dramatically reduced other social contacts (FCHIP September 2020). Other grandparents and kin were not in physical contact with their families and grandchildren for months and even years. Zoom and Facetime have been ways of finding some solace, for those families that have access to them. At this writing, it is not clear whether COVID-19 and its variants has run its course or will ever do so. There are many efforts to reopen, access, and reduce public health avoidance strategies that are often followed by reinstatement to respond to upticks in new cases and encouraging more vaccination and booster shots. Some of the situations where older family members lived were risky. Nursing homes and rehabilitation centers were crowded and highly dangerous. Many residential facilities barred visitation which had a significant effect on or family involvement or oversight of their relatives of close friends. This was the case only in countries which had these facilities. The availability of vaccination and better treatments have been helpful, but uneven and sometimes unavailable health care resources have created many different situations and quality of interventions for older persons. Many systems have been overwhelmed and the situation for recruiting and training new health care professionals is dire all over the world. For example, Ocheing, et al. (2022) speak to the impact of the COVID-19 disproportionate on nursing facility and staff with staffing shortages and high turnover rates. The needs for vigilance in the use of booster

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vaccination, for installing better ventilation, and for encouraging masking still appear to be necessary, but all are difficult to motivate. Return to school and work and lowered use of protective strategies may continue to speed up the possibility of new infections. In nursing education in developing countries, the challenges of teaching in the epidemic and the need to use technical supports was especially high. “The irresolute time span of the COVID-19 pandemic and suspensions of clinical teaching and experiences have affected students’ readiness. . .”(Agu et al., 2021, 152). Looking specifically at Caribbean situations which had attempted to use online approaches, they found gaps both for teachers and students and problems with implementation and challenges from the accreditation groups. Students were lacking both equipment and the infrastructure to receive online instruction. The number and complexity of platforms was also problematic. Many students continue to be delayed in graduating and taking exams. Eighty nine percent of the nursing shortage is in developing countries, yet many nurses are migrating to more developed situations where there were nursing shortages and better pay and conditions. For the elderly, the problematic epidemic response in hospitals and the postponement of so-called elective procedures and the changes in the delivery of health and medical care may also have affected overall health and welfare. Some technologically savvy elders were helped by their online medical providers who have been were able to support and deliver quality care, but others have been dropped, postponed, or not diagnosed. The recent changes in younger couples’ marital timing by marrying a decade later and the later ages of mothers’ first births also has meant many prospective grandparents have not had a grandchild or they were much older when it happened (Furstenberg, et al. 2020). The situation also changed in the teenage mothers’ sector with reduced numbers of births. Since 1991, the teen birth rate dropped in the U.S. to 16.7 for a thousand females in 2019 (CDC, 2022). In international estimates of demographic trends, later childbirth and fewer children overall dominate the changes. The estimates for the overall impact on life expectancy and population trends due to COVID-19 are still in the early stages of assessment (Heuveline, 2022). Heuveline estimated that global life expectancy appears to have declined by 0.92 years between 2019 and 2020 and by another 0.72 years between 2020 and 2021. He notes that since 1950 only rare occasions, such as the peak of AIDS in sub-Saharan African nations, have declines of that magnitude happened. The impact of this long pandemic dislocation around the world has included inflation, higher housing prices and limited housing availability. Health and education workers have been highly stressed and recruitment for new professionals in these fields is doubtful. In studying the COVID-19 impact on South Korea, Hong Kong and Taiwan, Choi et al. (2022, 1) identified new social risks in five critical areas of physical health, employment and income, skills and knowledge, care, and social relationships. These societies were centers for robust public health and community responses that kept the cases low and contributed to economic recovery (2). These issues are associated with uncertainty, complexity, and probable persistence through the life course and the intensity varies with one’s work situation and prospects.

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Shortfalls in programs and responses and new social divides were found in all three countries and there is a need to address these issues, both in the near term and in a more permanent approach to future unknowns. Using Wave 6 of the World Values Study, many countries were included in an examination of attitudes toward the elderly (Peterson & Ralston, 2017). Attitudes affect policy and more aged are now everywhere. Dependency or burden often was attached to age in making comments on aging. One aspect is looking at what predicts individuals’ attitudes toward elderly persons. Another is how do the culture, social structure, and the political and economic structure of a country influence individuals’ attitudes toward older adults. They sought to see which types of countries seem to value elderly persons and what policies were in place. The results are counter to common assumptions. Developed countries tended to see the elderly as useful and getting their fair share of resources. Poorer places elicited responses suggesting a sense of malaise about older people having too much. In many places the close location of relatives to each other makes social and economic exchange relatively easy. Grandchildren may go to their grandparents’ homes after school or parents may drop off young children before going to work. Being able to drop by informally makes it relatively easy for grandparents to be involved. Caregiving varies across the children’s development and needs. “Grandparents, in particular, are recognized as being the ‘first line of defense’ when families are troubled, disrupted or in need, often contributing time, caregiving, and financial resources as necessary” (Mutchler & Baker, 2009, 1576). Stepping in to provide the central child rearing itself may require a negotiation and renegotiation. Some of these households represent “skipped generations” with no parents in the household and often include school age children. Others have shared care including parent(s) in the household, but with grandparents taking major responsibility. About half of the grandparent care households include both grandparents. Relationships with grandchildren can last more than 20 years and for younger grandparents may survive into the adult years. The later adolescence and young adult years are quite busy times and the amount of interaction when grandchildren no longer need care may not lead to intensive relationships. As they become employed, leave home, develop partner relationships, marry, and have children, contact becomes more sporadic (Geurts, et al., 2009). When we look at grandparenting today we need to be aware that the three or four generations that are being examined may differ as to what cohorts are being included in different families (McDaniel, 2009). Cohort, in contrast to generation, directs attention to socio-political events as they intersect for people who share the same birth date. McDaniel (2009) makes a case for using cohort and generation clearly and not conflating them in our discussions of intergenerational family relationships. Multi-generational families experience increasing diversity as to who is considered family (McDaniel and Gazso, 2014). Economic delocalization and globalization in the later part of the twentieth century and into the twenty-first century has affected nuclear and extended families. Young adults have had to become more mobile. Capital and means of production have become even more portable, with few national barriers. Labor has had many

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more regulations, especially in terms of mobility (Legrain, 2008). National borders have been strengthened in terms of immigration policies and enforcement and often only the worker is admitted or the narrowly defined nuclear family is allowed to immigrate. The extended family may be allowed to follow if their adult children can show economic resources to sponsor them in the new country (Settles, 2006). Clearly the choice of legal definitions of family and limitations on freedom of movement affect the grand-generations. Remittances from this labor force provide much of the income in poorer countries and are essential to the connections and upkeep of children and grandparents left behind. They represent the second largest source of external funding for developing countries (Lopez-Ekra, et al., 2011). Women send almost half of the remittances; they also send money more regularly and for longer periods. Senyurekli & Detzner (2008) suggest that the support and resources being shared with relatives are fundamental to transnationalism. Grandparents often shoulder the full responsibility for day-to-day care or else must be in constant communication with their distant adult children as decisions are made. Families are often split for much longer than planned. In some Central American families, separation often extends over 4 years (Suarez-Orozco, et al., 2010). People work hard at overcoming distance and separation. Grandparents with the resources to travel or to bring their grandchildren and their families together may be able to maintain close relationships in spite of distance (Friedman, et al., 2008). Between countries the myriad of passport, visa requirements, invitations, time limits, health requirements and lead time to get these clearances can make it problematic, and trips to deal with crises are nearly impossible. Going home may also make returning to work risky. The history of families is filled with letters home and business afar, and early technologies such as the telegraph, the telephone and the short-wave radio linked families in the last two centuries (Yzer & Southwell, 2008). Boase and Wellman (2006) see neither utopian nor dystopian views as helpful to view contact through the Internet, but rather see an extension of ordinary patterns and contact within the internet environment. The rapidity of new technology changes has challenged the hierarchies of the generations in meeting the need both to learn technology and to use it well. There are digital divides not only in terms of access to technology, but also in the online skills and use of the opportunities (Jung, et al., 2005). Grandchildren are often good tutors to older family members on the quickly changing technologies and media fads. In a qualitative study in England, the grandparent/young grandchild dyads used collaborative talking to share thinking in their activity with a computer (Kenner, et al., 2008). It was not just conversation, but also grandparents’ touch, smiles, and gaze that encouraged children in their exploration. Guided participation created synergy and mutuality leading to new linguistic and cultural competency.

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Impact of Disease and Demography The demography of age and generations has been dramatically altered giving more opportunities for the aged to be involved with their grandchildren and their families (Spence, et al. 2001). Sheppard (2019) believes that the transition to being a grandparent needs to be studied in more detail, especially the two aspects of the change of status itself and how it plays out in term of interaction. Furstenberg, et al. (2020, 1405) suggest that we view “changes in the past half century as a diversification of family types rather than a replacement of the nuclear form.” They also call attention to how kinship works across many family forms, especially steprelationships and the creation of voluntary kinship. The vast inequities within developed countries and the extreme poverty in much of the world will, no doubt, accentuate the long-term impact of the pandemic. There may be some lessons learned that will help in addressing the next plague. One worry is the fatigue of many people for following the precautions that work. Looking back at polio, we were able to launch a complete inoculation of the world. During this pandemic, inoculation became a political tool, and many people have gone without vaccine. Hebblewaite and Norris suggest that Erickson’s concept of generativity should be seen more broadly, “Generativity is a dynamic process constructed out of interaction between generations that evolves across the lifespan.” (2011, 130). Grandparents have been reported to have a protective quality for grandchildren. The correlation between grandparents’ availability and young children’s survival has been widely discussed especially in subsistence societies (Sear & Mace, 2008; Tanskanen, et al. 2011). Maternal grandparents and especially grandmothers are more often reported as important. When Strassmann & Garrard (2011) revisited the Sear and Mace metareview of studies of patrilineal, high fertility/ high child mortality groups, they found that their new methodology as well as the earlier approach emphasized that the maternal grandparents, especially the grandmother, was positive. Most of these studies do not have any window on how these relationships protect or whether the same variables lead to both child and elder survival was positive. Most of these studies do not have any window on how these relationships protect or whether the same variables lead to both child and elder survival.

Proximity, Co-Residence and Caregiving The COVID-19 pandemic has been problematic in terms of this family interaction. While elders have had access to vaccination and booster shots, children’s vaccines were approved much later, and even at the time of writing, children under age 5 in the U.S. still do not have a vaccine available (CDC, April 14, 2022). This is especially true in the Third World. The broad availability of testing was not immediately available everywhere and home testing was also slow in reaching

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everyone. The large family gatherings traditional to many families have been dangerous to both elders and children. For the most part, grandparents have had to decide when and where to socialize with their families. For many families, technical communication has been the best bet for being safe and close (Barr, et al. 2021). Facetime and Zoom have been vital connections with those grandparents who had several devices, although those are very limited in the rest of the world. Co-residence has in many cultures been a support to grandparents, adult children and grandchildren. (Nauck & Suckow, 2006). Co-residence meets the needs of younger families and supports direct and indirect transfers of support. Dolbin-McNab & O’Connell (2021) develop “five systemically informed themes including the assumption of caregiving responsibilities, grandparent stress and well-being, caring for vulnerable grandchildren, navigating relationships with parents, and contextual stressors of societal stigma and barriers to service” (p, 222). Co-residence has in many cultures been a support to grandparents, adult children and grandchildren interaction, (Nauck & Suckow, 2006). Maternal grandparents, especially grandmothers, often provide a refuge for young unmarried mothers (Monserud & Elder, 2011). Paternal grandparents are often the preference in cultures that emphasize patriarchy.. Co-residence meets the needs of younger families and supports direct and indirect transfers of support. Co-residence is often a stage or a phase in family trajectories. Frail elders may be taken in when they need more extensive care. Adult children may return home when they are unemployed or when there is a greater need for childcare. This option has been common during both the opioid crisis and the COVID-19 pandemic (Davis, et al., 2020). Research indicates that the opioid crisis presents distinct challenges for the grandparent-led families and for the systems that serve the new family arrangement (Davis, et al. 2020). Crisis often triggers a change in guardianship and continues to be an issue throughout the years.

China’s Evolving Intergenerational Family System In Shanghai and Tianjin, Chinese grandparents often live with a married child (43% of those over 60) and many live in close proximity to their children and grandchildren (Goh, 2006). Some grandparents have migrated in order to be available to give care. Mostly the households include the paternal grandparents, but better educated couples may live with the wife’s parents if they have a choice. “Social and economic change in China has changed the terms of intergenerational relations in rural areas where out migration of young adults has altered the way older and younger adults rely on each other (Cong & Silverstein, 2008, 21). China has revised its Elderly Rights Law by requiring the adult children to pay regular visits to their aged parents (Wong, 2013,). China Health and Retirement Longitudinal Study data indicated an upturn in contact with natal families for both

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sons and daughters (Gruuters, 2017). Although eager for training and education, traditional coparents had problems participating. The connections to their own families of origin continued to be helpful. Families use technology and try to have frequent contact, but long-distance migrants may be limited to the annual new year’s trip to see their families. Gruuters and Ermisch (2019) use the 2010 China Family Panel Studies to take a subsample of 4236 couples and examine the factors associated with location relative to parents. Findings indicate 75% of married Chinese couples live with or in close proximity to the husband’s parents. The strong social gradient is particularly pronounced among rural- origin and the less educated. Matrilocal residence is unusual but more likely if the wife has no brothers. However, most couples do not live with their parents. Left behind elders are found in most rural areas and daughters are often the solo filial tie. The household registration system discourages rural to urban migration. Hu (2017) suggests that daughters are providing more care and transfers to older parents. The study looks at transfers in both directions upstream and downstream. Care and transfers of resources including love, marriages, separate housing, and pensions for parents has become similar for sons and daughters. Couples expect help from both sets of parents and in return support them. An asymmetrical pattern of exchange occurs when living with children to provide childcare. In spite of changes in parental transfers still parents more often left a bequest to sons but sometimes more daughters were provided financial help and care. Pensions are rare in rural areas and elders need support. Maternal grandparents are more likely to get financial aid from their working daughters and those who receive financial support are less likely to be depressed. About one-half provided care for at least one set of grandchildren and one-quarter for 2 or more offspring’s children. Grandparents claimed emotional closeness to their adult children, but also found co-parenting could cause conflicts. Some parents are concerned as to whether grandparent care is sufficiently educational for younger children (Nyland et al., 2009). Zhang, et al. (2019) developed a study to explore the new practice of replacing the tradition of patriarchy in which the interaction with grandparents which had been almost exclusively with husband’s parents and the grandchildren. They explored how contact and help now often included the wife’s family. The 77 couples were drawn from a random sample in Nanking and content analysis was used. Reasons given for choosing help were based on availability, caregiving qualifications, and nature of the relationships with adult children and their spouses all favoring maternal grandmothers. Also new norms in grandparent childcare, reinterpreted intergenerational relationships, women’s empowerment in their natal families and choosing child-centered care ideology (1174). Several studies document a trend toward maternal side care with paternal grandmother as a visitor (1176). The changing roles of women now led to the mothers’ having income of their own and the ability to help their own parents and, in addition, the husband’s support had moved to be for both sides of the family. Women who were raised as singleton in the one- child family got more attention and investment from their parents (p. 1177). There is more attention to the downward flow of resources now. As many as 2/3 of

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Chinese urban children are being cared for by at least one grandparent. Many grandparents have exclusive care of their grandchild. Maternal grandmothers were nearly equally likely to care for either granddaughter or grandson – at a rate of 54.5% or 45.5% - and paternal grandmothers were equal in care at 50%. “. Still in China, many transfers of property and wealth follow patriarchal patterns. “While both maternal and paternal grandmothers provided substantial care – 69.9 and 50 hours per X TIME FRAME, respectively – grandfathers averaged almost half at 32 hours per X TIME FRAME” (Zhang, et al., 1179). Qualitative themes about selection of the caregiver grandmother were 1) availability, 2.) qualifications and 3.) avoidance of intergenerational conflict (1180). Reasons for not asking were grandparent employment, not in the city or unwilling to move there, poor health or other commitments to do childcare. Singleton parents were highly likely to receive childcare from their parents (women 79% and men 86%). Perceptions of the grandmother’s ability to provide “better care” and less competition with caring for other grandchildren were noted (1191) Other characteristics included being educated, speaking well, living in the city, and knowing modern child rearing. Some parents involved both sets of grandparents and were grateful for the differences each brought to rearing children, and there was a concern that children be ready for school. Many more couples have a neolocal residence and that independency from parents was considered desirable. There was an emphasis on not having conflict especially around the husband’s mother which affected some childcare decisions (1183). The Chinese one child policy has meant fewer children needing care. Maternal grandmothers appear to have fewer reasons for conflict with their daughters. (1184). Fathers appreciated not having to moderate a relationship with their mothers over childcare. The drift toward a set of relationships to share the child’s upbringing with both sets of grandparents has been transformative in urban areas. Rural families did have a possibility to have a second child with hopes of a son and there is an expectation of old age care from children and grandchildren. The newer policy of allowing second children is national in scope. However, the slow uptake to having a second child has been unexpected and its potential for changing childcare patterns remains to be seen (1188). It could be that the one child family remains satisfied.

Other National Examples A Korean comparative study (Choi, et al. 2019) examined the differences over 10 years in how men’s and women’s marital satisfaction and patterns of contact with their own parents related to respondents’ and parents’ characteristics. The historical situation of being a Confucian oriented society where patrilineal traditions about family relationships has been losing its influence and modernization theory has supplanted much of these norms with a more egalitarian outlook. This study compares across 2006 and 2016 in the Korean General Social Services Survey,

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. . .“revealing increased movement toward more egalitarian and bilateral intergenerational kin relationships over time, particularly among women.” (1192). In the process of the waning influence of mothers-in-law, more bilateral ties have emerged (Choi et al., 2019). More contact is often more positive interaction. Support care due to ill-health or need for childcare were treated separately. Over the ten-year period, a change to a more egalitarian and more bilateral pattern was identified (1201). Much lower co-residence with the older generation was found over the 10 years. Although this study did not characterize the grandchildren contacts, the more frequent overall contacts were favorable to the couples. In Australia, the Martu Aborigines have rather open caregiving practices that involve many family and community members (Scelza, 2009). In a qualitative study, a fine-grained analysis of specific care found grandmothers not far behind mothers in the amount of care given. A small qualitative interview study of Maya adolescents and caregivers in Guatemala and the parents in the United States was undertaken (Hershberg, 2018). Some of the caregivers were grandparents especially addressing how “consejos,” the passing on of conventional wisdom might be part of the conversations and communication cross nationally. Grandparents were often the caregivers, but older brothers and others were also noted. The undocumented parents in the United States described how they tried to keep contact and be careful how they intervened and maintained their relationships. New Zealand pioneered prioritizing grandparent placement in their 1989 law. This law also addressed the problem of the Maori minority having had many placements of children outside their communities who were overrepresented in the foster child population (Worrall, 2006). In this situation grandparents may not have decision making authority. Under the new law, Family Group Conferences were an innovative development in decision making which included extended families in the process. About one third of the families had an informal agreement; one fifth had a family agreement, one fifth had no legal status and the rest had used the Family Group Conference. One of the difficulties for a third of the grandparents was the legal challenges and costs they faced. Some felt that they were being forced to take custody. The question of transferring custody is fraught with emotion and conflicts as grandparents hope the parents may be able to resume care for their children. The claim to enjoying grandchildren as the premise of the relationship allows a certain choice over what activities are fun and therefore enjoyable, but taking full responsibility modifies the relationships and increases the responsibility of grandparents and grandchildren. It may be out of “sync” with where the grandparents’ own needs are (Neely-Barnes, et al., 2010). A gendered life course seen for women that is socially patterned with exits from work and the likelihood of widowhood ((Flood & Moen, 2015, 92). More women actually retire now with many also caring for grandchildren and/or aging parents in this encore adult period. They see these trends as supporting the linked lives hypothesis. Wiese et al. (2016, 830) looked at retirement decisions of similar aged employees in the U.S., both men and women who were anticipating grandparenting and then

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later being grandparents. They were less involved with their jobs and had more family related hopes and fewer retirement related concerns about health, finances, dependence than the control participants. Maternal grandparents were less involved in their jobs and had more positive attitude toward retirement and few were fears of uselessness and loneliness than paternal grandparents.

Legal Barriers and Supports Grandparents do not automatically have access to their grandchildren. This process is mediated by the child’s parents and may be adversely affected by such changes as divorce, mobility, and estrangement from the adult children. Drug, alcohol, and mental and physical health problems are widespread, and grandparents may be called upon to rescue grandchildren and care for their adult children (Hayslip & Kiminski, 2005). Kin care has been promoted and many grandparents are serving as foster parents. The 1996 Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity reconciliation Act (PROWRA) program targets low-income mothers for a welfare-to-work program in the U.S., and Ho (2015, p. 419) examined the influence on this program on the maternal grandmothers and their responses. “The results suggest that grandmothers decreased time transfers and increased money transfer to their at-risk daughters” (Ho 2015 p. 419). Mazelis and Mykyta, (2020) recently analyzed low-income couples who recently had a child and their access to financial and other instrumental support. The data was from the Time Love and Cash among Couples with Children study which is embedded in the Fragile Families and Wellbeing Study. Some individualist pride was found among these needy couples when it came to taking help or money even when needed. Reciprocity was problematic and asking was difficult. Many of their parents or others did give gifts and support. Having grandchildren is sometimes a path to easier relationships. Parents in the U.S. may have assumed that same sex relationships would deprive them of a next generation. When grandparents themselves have come out about their own sexual orientation, the child’s parents may not be so open to that situation either. Some research indicators which suggest that child rearing is not much affected by same sex parenting (Stacey & Biblarz, 2001), or maybe even more positive for lesbian couples (Biblarz & Stacey 2010), so we may anticipate that grandparenting in these families may also prove to be rather ordinary.

Stepparents and Step-Grandparents Stepfamilies are more structurally more complex than nuclear families and also carry histories from previous relationships which may still have some impact (Ganong et al. 2019). The first bonds are often with their children rather than the couple, so

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relating to the parent and his or her child may be a challenge. Sanner, et al. (2019) in a qualitative study interviewing stepchildren about their step-grandparents in the U.S. and found these grandparents to be engaging in affinity building efforts and they expressed affection for their stepparents. Respondents saw family as affective/ behavioral not biological or legal ties (Sanneribid, 488).). Constructing family affection for stepparents; stepparents working on affinity building; stepchildren being positive about the effort; biological parents using age effective to facilitate close ties. Evaluations: authenticity, goodness of fit, gifts that were thoughtful, comparing to other grandchildren’s treatment. Inclusion in activities and family pictures, compared to other grandparents too. Choice about how to relate was important especially to older children (ibid 494). Perceived benefits of close relationships with step-grandparents included the pleasure of the relationships and acceptance for the whole family.

Conclusion Families are evolving to be much more complex than commonly acknowledged and the new generations of grandparents are being challenged by changing social arrangements and legal structures. Divorce, co-habitation, and remarriage have become more common and acceptable in the twenty-first century for both parents and grandparents. Divorced fathers were often marginalized and accepted to the extent they paid support. As grandfathers, their relationships with their children as adults are often fragile and their contact with grandchildren may be even less certain. Remarriage in either generation can be problematic in terms of access to grandchildren and making substantial relationships. Cohabitation either as a longterm relationship or as a short-term strategy adds to the complexity. While we do research on children of single parents or stepchildren it is not often recognized that for any child several of these types of families may exist over his or her life course and that these changes also happen in adulthood and matter for the relationships among kin and contacts with grandparents. The literature on grandparenting draws from many disciplines and service professions including such areas as family studies, family therapy, gerontology, intergenerational relationships, nursing, public health, education, law, communication, psychology, and economics. The literature on intergenerational transfers has attempted to explain why and when grandparents and their adult children help each other and give each other significant gifts or inheritance. Overall the studies note the largest transfers go from the older to the younger generations (Friedman et al., 2008; Hank & Buber, 2009; Nauck & Suckow, 2006). There is a sense of mutual support, but clearly the majority of older people are supportive to the younger generation. There is also a shift from transfers to the parents to the grandchildren over time (Hoff, 2007). Elders, as the preservationists of family and cultural history and as builders of children’s memories, have a key role. Being interested in how children and young

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adults see their worlds and having time to entertain their views can be rewarding to grandparents as well as their grandchildren. There are many intergenerational exchanges that cement relationships that are not captured well in the exchange literature. Shared experiences and memories are the ties that underlie many other exchanges. Talk about events is a key to children’s memory of them and talking about memories makes them more accessible (Peterson, et al., 2008). The research has been more often at the qualitative level to examine specific cultures and roles or at the demographic or population level. The issues of childcare and socioeconomic exchange and transfers have been examined in some depth. Comparable data on a large number of countries is emerging from Nauck’s and Trommsdorff ‘s Value of Children studies with information on three generations. There have been some efforts to link fields. Hanks and Ponsetti (2004) explored the literature and links in family and intergenerational relationships and suggest that while each is a separate field, the reciprocal nature of relationships across the life course and between generations is a natural foundation for collaboration. Several qualitative studies in communication and memory studies suggest a greater emphasis on looking at the qualities and content of grandparenting interaction with both grandchildren and adult children would be rewarding. While it is true that grandmothers have an edge on longevity and traditional caregiving expectations, the dearth of attention to grandfathers leaves a rich area for new research and theory. Expanding the socioeconomic exchange perspective to include affective, emotional, and interactive processes would provide more refined understanding of how family processes really work in terms of grandparents and their grandchildren. The grandparent-grandchild interaction has become more important to contemporary family life and would appear to be a nexus for new research and theory building in many areas of study. 1. Others may continue to be suffering disabilities. The loss of younger family members may seem out of order and even more disastrous. 2. Some are still isolated and without plans. 3. Some are pioneering and finding new ways to relate and support each other, 4. Looking forward professionally in family science we need to study afresh family, generational and local caregiving and exchange. 5. Some of our trends and predictions should be re-examined for the consequences of this experience.

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Barbara H. Settles, BSc, 1958, MSc, 1962, PhD 1964. from Ohio State University, is Professor of Human Development and Family Studies at University of Delaware. Among the recognitions she received are: (2015) University of Delaware Women’s Caucus Torch Award for Lifetime Work in Women’s Equity. (2008), Fellow, National Council on Family Relations, (2005). Jan Trost Award for Outstanding Contributions to Comparative Family Studies, (1997). Groves Academy & (1996) Lifetime member Groves Conference on Marriage and Family, (1992). American Home Economics Association, Massachusetts Avenue Award, for invited paper, Changing Social Values (1984). Her interests include family life education across the life course, policy, and equity in higher education.

Parenting and Technology Jon Lasser and Jolene Ellis

Introduction Parenting and child rearing practices have always been shaped by technology, as past generations have witnessed (consider the advent of radio, telephones, and television). Even so, the influence of computers, Internet, and smartphones may represent the greatest and most rapid change in the ways that technology has affected life in the home, school, and community. Though technology undoubtedly conveys many benefits to children, adolescents, and families, these gains do not come without risks and challenges (Brooks & Lasser, 2018). As technology becomes increasingly a part of our lives, parents and caregivers seek guidance that will help them maximize the benefits and mitigate the potential harms. In this chapter we review the literature on parenting/caregiving and technology with an aim toward providing a research-informed perspective on this critical topic. Psychologists and other child advocates have sounded alarm bells about the risks associated with unfettered access to screens. Though scholars have not been able to demonstrate many causal relationships between screen time and psychological wellbeing, some speculate that there may indeed be such an effect, given the observed changes since the use of smartphones became widespread. For example, Twenge and colleagues recently reported data from 37 countries regarding selfreported loneliness at school (2012–2018) and found an increase in such reports in 36 of those countries from which data were available (Twenge et al., 2021). While loneliness is not a psychological disorder, it is certainly associated with serious

J. Lasser School Psychology Program, Texas State University, San Marcos, TX, USA e-mail: [email protected] J. Ellis (*) Licensed Specialist in School Psychology (LSSP), Southlake, TX, USA © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_22

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problems like depression, and should be of concern to parents, caregivers, and educators (Haidt & Twenge, 2021). Families and educators also share concerns about online bullying, exposure to adult content such as pornography and violence, compulsive use of screen time, decreased physical activity, and limited interactions with others in real life (IRL). Profiles of children who spend hours upon hours playing video games, viewing pornography, bullying peers, or falling into depression from social comparison and isolation are featured in the media, but may be less common than the more subtle erosion of attention and concentration from spending time on social media. Given these concerns, parents and caregivers may worry about how technology may impact the growth and development of their children. Commonly asked questions include: • • • •

At what age should my child begin spending time in front of a screen? How can I establish and maintain screen time limits? What is the best way to supervise child and adolescent Internet use? What should parents and caregivers do when family and school screen time rules differ?

Potential Impacts of Technology on Children and Parenting The World Health Organization (WHO) has identified excessive screen time as a serious concern, particularly in the context of the COVID-19 pandemic that pushed many children and adolescents out of in-person experiences and into virtual settings (e.g., online school) (WHO 2021). In particular, the WHO noted that excessive screen time may displace sleep and exercise, encourage compulsive behaviors like gaming disorders or gambling, and contribute to malnutrition, headaches, and neck pain. Warning signs of excessive screen use cited by the WHO include impaired focus with educational tasks, diminished relationships with family members, mood swings and aggressive behaviors when asked to limit screen time, and declines in self-care behaviors (e.g. bathing, sleeping, eating). Consequently, many parents seek guidance and support to prevent, address, and manage these concerns. Recommendations from the WHO indicate that parents and caregivers play an important role in supporting children’s development by maintaining healthy screen time limits (WHO, 2019). The recommendations suggest for children in the first year of life, screen time should be avoided, and that children under the age of 5 years spend very little time in front of screens and more time engaged in play and other forms of social and physical activity. The overall focus of the guidelines is directed at improving health by ensuring that children have enough physical activity and sleep while limiting sedentary behavior. These goals may be achieved when parents and caregivers provide opportunities for children to be active and engaged without screens, establish clear rules and limits around screen time, support healthy eating

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and sleeping behaviors (e.g., no screens at bedtime), and educate children about online health and safety. It should be noted that screen time concerns are limited to those who have access. According to the United Nations, almost half of the world’s population remains without access to the Internet, creating a significant digital divide (United Nations, 2021). While those who are online reap the benefits of connectivity and incur the risks, those without access suffer inequalities that may be exacerbated by limited opportunities. As more people in the developing world gain access to the Internet, there will likely be a replication of the screen time challenges that are present now in developed countries. Ideally, lessons learned can be successfully applied to new users.

A Global Perspective on Screen Time and Children The ways in which digital technologies have been introduced to home and school settings across the world varies considerably, and we are still learning about the different ways in which the benefits and risks of putting children in front of screens unfold across varied cultural and economic contexts. Unfortunately, the application of research findings from nations like the United States to countries like Malawi fails to consider critical factors at the local level. For example, most of the research on children and technology has been conducted in urban settings, but many children in the world live in rural communities (Livingstone et al., 2017). Rather than merely imposing a Western paradigm on non-Western countries, Livingstone and colleagues recommend this consideration of goals: Is the goal to prepare students for a competitive workforce, to connect marginalized youth, to support schools, or to provide progressive alternatives to school? The goals determine the means, and both have implications for evaluating technological interventions (p. 138).

The challenges become more apparent when differential effects are observed across countries. For example, though Chile has successfully increased internet access to families, advances in learning have not been realized, and access to digital technologies may have even inadvertently made inequality gaps wider (Claro et al., 2015). And though emerging research in Arab countries shows enthusiasm for educational opportunities, these positive feelings are tempered by concerns about potentially corrupting influences of access (Northwestern University in Qatar, 2013). And in some parts of Asia, online learning has led to increased parental pressures on middleclass youth to spend even more time studying, which may be damaging to family relationships (Lim, 2016). Each of these examples show how the phenomenon of technology and children “open to different interpretations, ranging from an instrumental concern with employability and growth to more idealist concerns for social mobility, social justice, and empowerment” (Livingstone et al., 2017, p. 139). Ultimately, concerns about screen time and children across cultures reflect the values and anxieties of each country with respect to children and screens. In wealthier

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nations, adults focus on compulsive or excessive use of screens, privacy issues, and exposure to adult content; poorer nations emphasize equity, access, and fair distribution (Livingstone et al., 2017).

A Model for Managing Screen Time for Families Drawing on a public health model, Brooks and Lasser (2018) proposed a tiered approach to technology and children that emphasizes both prevention of problems and a systematic way of responding to challenges associated with screen time use that interferes with other developmental tasks and activities. At the foundation of the model is the relationship between the child and parent/caregiver, largely because adults have the greatest influence with children in the context of a healthy, trusting relationship. The authoritative parenting style, characterized by both warmth and setting limits/ boundaries, is associated with a host of positive outcomes (Darling, 1999). This parenting style is associated with warmth (loving kindness) and boundaries (expectations and limits). Parents who are overly punitive, inflexible, or excessively permissive may be less effective at meeting their children’s developmental and behavioral needs. Therefore, authoritative parents collaboratively problem-solve with children and adolescents when screen time usage becomes problematic. For example, rather than taking a top-down approach (e.g., “no screen time because I say so!), authoritative parents help children and adolescents identify their own goals and work with them to ensure that they have a balanced use of technology (e.g., you say you want to play sports and do well in school, so let’s work together to figure out how much screen time would be good without interfering with your other goals.). With the relationship as the foundation, Brooks and Lasser provide three levels for parents and caregivers to consider when thinking about screen time challenges: preventing, addressing, and intervening. At the preventing level, screen time problems are minimal or non-existent, and the focus is on ensuring that children have opportunities to play, explore, and socialize in real life. Consistent with guidelines from the WHO, the prevention model encourages adults to avoid screen time for very young children, and to have limited screen time for older children. Based on the premise that it’s easier to prevent a problem than to solve it, the prevention orientation parallels other public health efforts (e.g., preventing cardiovascular disease by supporting healthy eating and exercise). When adults notice some indicators of excessive screen time use, these concerns are addressed at the second level of the model. For example, when screen time begins to overshadow other activities, children express frustration when denied screen time, or declines in school performance are observed. This may require addressing the concerns with increased parental oversight, additional encouragement to engage in activities away from screens, and some collaborative problem solving around these issues.

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Should children not respond well to limits set at the addressing level, then parent/ caregivers may need to intervene. While punishment may be ineffective to combat excessive screen time use, some children may benefit from firm limits set with warmth. Adults may also consider that the overreliance on screens may be the symptom of a deeper problem (e.g., students dealing with social anxiety by focusing more on screens than in-person interactions), and support from a mental health professional may be beneficial to work on the underlying causes. When asked about the technology problems they see at home, parents/caregivers report failing grades, chronic sleep loss, little to no recreational activities or exercise, complaints of boredom when not in front of a screen, very negative mood when denied screen time, and few relationships outside of gaming or online activity. In most cases, these problems developed over a long period of time and are not resolved quickly. Although there are no simple solutions, with dedication and support, often these serious problems can be successfully addressed. Most families are capable of addressing their children’s serious screen time problems without resorting to placement in a residential treatment center or outpatient therapy, though these may be appropriate options for the most severe cases. There may be situations in which adults need to restrict access to technology to help children live more balanced lives. In general, parents are not advised to deny all access (the “cold turkey” approach) when it comes to screen use. There are a number of reasons for this. For one, it’s impossible to enforce a cold turkey approach given that kids do much of their school work on computers and tablets. So, the issue is whether we can restrict their recreational screen use while not affecting their productivity screen use. Social, entertainment, and productivity uses are bundled together with our screens. It is practically impossible to restrict access to all recreational screen use because that would mean restricting productivity screen use. However, if the source of the problematic screen use is a gaming console, then there is a greater chance of being able to impose restrictions on the target behavior with minimal consequences for productivity.

Evidence-Based Recommendations A review of the developmental research on television viewing found that infants learn very little from television and, “there is evidence that the constant presence of background television frequently gets young children’s attention and distracts them during play, reduces their focused attention, and diminishes parent-child interaction” (Courage & Setliff, 2010). We know that during the first year of life, learning occurs best when infants interact with adults and other children, and that time in front of a screen is time that’s not spent engaged with a human. We’re still learning how family life, parent-child interactions, and happiness are affected by increased use of smartphones, video games, and Internet usage. However, a large body of research in the areas of developmental psychology, child development, and family systems tells us that healthy, well-adjusted individuals

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feel connected to those around them (Zelinski & Nisbit, 2014). When we fail to form and maintain our most intimate and loving relationships, we fail to take care of our most basic needs. When technology disrupts these relationships, families have to find ways to reconnect to each other, even if it means disconnecting from devices.

Practical Considerations for Families Safety and Digital Media Citizenship: For youth who are preparing to become social media users, there is much to learn to ensure safety and responsible digital media citizenship. It is strongly recommended that parents and caregivers have many talks with their children prior to providing access to gauge their maturity level and overall readiness. An article from Common Sense Media, “Help! My Kid Wants to Use Social Media” discusses suggested conversation starters where youth provides feedback about topics such as what apps they may want to use and why, pitfalls of certain apps, communication that belongs and doesn’t belong on social media, considerations before posting online, how to handle inappropriate behavior from others (e.g., harassment, odd behavior), understanding of privacy settings, awareness of social media’s impact on mood/behavior, and feedback on limit setting The article further acknowledges the importance of presenting monitoring and limit setting with social media as a way of providing a safety net where youth are supported rather than being spied upon. (Elgersma, 2019). In summary, parents and caregivers want to build reciprocal trust and communication where youth can have some freedom to explore with healthy limits and seek out or accept adult guidance and support should demands of social media exceed their skill set. One important guideline is to put things in perspective before deciding to curtail technology. Parent/caregiver relationships with their children and adolescents are more important than homework, screen time, messy rooms, and household chores. Sometimes adult judgment becomes clouded, and there is potential to damage relationships by prioritizing compliance with requests. Parents can support healthy relationships in the family by picking battles and placing the person as a priority above the need for compliance. When children demonstrate signs that their use of screens has interfered with other developmental tasks, the impulse for many adults is to manage the child’s access to and activity with screens more actively, as we have stated, there may be good reasons to do this. Even so, overly managing a child’s screen time may inadvertently limit a child’s ability to develop and deploy self-monitoring and selfregulation, two skills that are important for achieving greater independence as children grow older. Put another way, in order for kids to learn how to put down their devices so that they can do their schoolwork, play with friends in real life, and get enough sleep, they need to learn how to do that on their own. Children who are excessively managed externally will be deprived the opportunity to learn selfregulation and therefore become dependent on others.

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Parents and caregivers also serve as behavioral models for children and adolescents and may be powerful social learning models by putting down their own devices to be present with others. When children see the adults in their lives focused on phones, email, and social media, they learn that excessive screen time is normative and that screens may be prioritized over people in our presence. Granted, adults also struggle with excessive screen use, but these challenges may be teachable moments for children. By verbalizing internal thoughts, adults can demonstrate how to achieve better balance. For example, a father may say aloud, “I’ve been spending too much time on my computer today. Part of me wants to get some more emails sent before the end of the day, but I’d rather play with you this evening. I’ll turn my computer off.” This helps children develop their own internal scripts for self-regulation and self-monitoring. Creating healthy, individualized systems for supervising technology use is another complex concern faced by many parents and caregivers. This task may be perceived by many as daunting given the dynamic nature of technology and the unique needs of individual youth. However, consideration of some general guidelines may help parents and caregivers approach this process with more confidence: As with approaching most complicated topics, preparation is likely to yield the most successful results. Prior to introducing any new technology, parents and caregivers may spend time reflecting on the following: • What primary benefits do I want my child to get out of technology use at this time? As we know, technology can serve many positive purposes such as social interaction, intellectual curiosity, educational opportunities, creativity, communication, entertainment, and efficiency in everyday tasks. While parents and caregivers are likely interested in their child obtaining benefits from all of these areas, getting a sense of the primary purpose may help to decide what applications/devices are most appropriate initially. • How will the application/device being considered support my child’s development? Screen time, particularly when used actively and creatively (as opposed to passively), may offer benefits. For example, a shy adolescent who struggles to speak up in class may benefit from learning to develop communication skills in a way that feels safe to them by emailing their teacher directly to ask questions about class content. Similarly, a child with a learning disability who tends to avoid reading, may benefit from accessing audiobooks on a tablet which may in turn increase vocabulary, comprehension, and an overall interest in reading. • Do I feel my child is ready for the device/application? If not, are there specific skills that my child lacks that could be supported with adult supervision and/or parental controls embedded in the device? These questions may be best answered by considering your child’s level of maturity including their ability to inhibit impulsive behavior, manage emotions, and make responsible decisions. Other considerations may include children’s social skills such as their ability to understand subtext or “read between the lines” during communication, manage conflict, and self-advocate or seek out a trusted adult if they run into trouble. As it is likely that youth has already received some level of exposure to technology from

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school and possibly community groups, parents and caregivers may also review that curriculum/messaging in order to get a better sense of some of the skills their youth may already be learning. • Do I have the skills to monitor my child’s use of technology and set limits on the device? While most parents and caregivers are likely very familiar with tablets, computers, and smartphones given the frequency in which they are used in everyday life, they may be less familiar with the parental controls available. As parental controls may vary across the various technologies and applications, it is important to know what supports are available (e.g., settings that limit screen time, block websites, turn off chat features, monitor or prevent monetary purchases). Further, parents and caregivers should be mindful of any pitfalls of parental controls such as the ease in which youth can disable parental controls. • Am I and other parents/caregivers in the home in agreement about technology use and limit setting? For children ages 6 and older, guidance is ambiguous. While some guidelines, such as no screen time during meal times, no technology within a certain time frame before bedtime, it is important that adults agree about the limits they feel comfortable setting within their family. Points of discussion may include how screen time use may align with family values, ways to enforce limits, and supporting one another if youth push back against limits. Introducing Technology. Once parents and caregivers feel ready to introduce technology, they should prepare to have ongoing conversations with their children to discuss logistics in a collaborative manner. Approaching these conversations using warmth and boundaries is likely to set the stage for collaboration in building healthy technology habits. During initial conversations with youth, parents and caregivers may consider the following talking points, with an example to illustrate: • Lead with confidence in your child’s readiness to use new technology and set the stage for collaboration: “After a lot of thought, your father and I agree that you are ready for the responsibility of using a tablet and want to have a family discussion about how it will be used. We really want to get your ideas too so that everyone’s input is being considered and that we all feel comfortable with the plan.” • Discuss the purpose of the device: “We would first like to talk to you about the kinds of tasks we think the tablet would be helpful for. We think it could be a great tool to use during homework time, after school and on weekends. We feel comfortable with you using apps that help with schoolwork and emailing your teachers to ask questions. How does this sound to you? Do you have any other ideas we should consider?” After feedback from your child, it may be helpful to discuss other features of the device that you would have concern about the child accessing such as social media for younger youth. • Be honest and transparent about the need to monitor technology use and discuss limits: “To support you with this big responsibility, we need to come up with a system for making sure that you are using the tablet in a way that is safe and healthy for you. One concern I have is that it could be tempting for you to get on websites that you aren’t ready for and that could be unsafe. It can be tough for

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anyone to resist exploring online. Can you help us come up with some ideas to help prevent that from happening?” Within these conversations, families should also discuss the importance of putting in safeguards to protect other important needs (e.g., sleep, family time, socializing with friends, completing self-care tasks, making time for hobbies). • Approach disagreement in technology negotiations as an opportunity to model healthy developmental skills: It is unlikely that all youth will respond to these conversations without any push back about boundaries and limit setting. Consider that they may disagree with you about limit setting and access. They may also compare their level of access to technology to that of their peers (which may be less restricted or even unrestricted). Consequently, youth may view boundaries and limit setting as unfair. Within this challenging dynamic is an opportunity to model important developmental skills such as perspective taking, compromise, and respectful communication. Parents and caregivers can do this through listening to their children’s ideas and feedback (without criticism). Statements such as “I hadn’t considered that before,” “That’s a fair point,” “I could see why you might want to use the tablet for talking with friends too” also indicates your responsiveness and willingness to hear your child out. Should youth make reasonable requests (maybe they have a good point you hadn’t considered before), modifying your original thoughts in the moment may be appropriate. It is also an acceptable response for parents and caregivers to request additional time to think about their child’s requests so they can provide thoughtful feedback. The same courtesy could also be offered to the child after parents and caregivers present their ideas. Another message that parents and caregivers may emphasize is that their child’s readiness for technology can be monitored and reassessed on a regular basis. With this in mind it may be beneficial to have collaborative conversations about skills they need to exhibit that would indicate their readiness for more autonomy with technology (e.g., managing basic needs without technology interfering, being respectful in communication in email). Further, these conversations could also include discussion of skills that they don’t necessarily possess right now, but could begin developing with the guidance and partnership of their parents and caregivers (e.g., ways to determine if someone really is a friend, ways to be safe online). Following initial conversations with youth, completing an explicit and concrete collaborative plan is recommended. Dr. Ryan Smith also offers downloadable digital technology plans on his website yourbestfamily.com, where youth and adults can co-create plans for the entire family (adults included). Including adults in a digital plan is good for modeling healthy technology boundaries and leads to a sense of fairness. There is a section on the website which guides users to consider policies, consequences for breaking policies, and the idea of tech free time that anyone can request at any time. In creating this plan, Dr. Smith recommends flexibility, combined with considering what’s healthy for the family. He notes that discussions should continue and family members shouldn’t sign until there is consensus. Additionally, he adds that family plans should be revisited as needed (Smith, n.d.).

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Once youth begin following digital media agreements, implementation monitoring systems is another important consideration, as previously discussed, to ensure that youth are being safe and adhering to boundaries. Some strategies for consideration include: • Become interested in your child’s media use: Parents and caregivers are likely to have a better sense of their child’s habits if they are asking questions. Examples may include asking your child to explain to you how their favorite game/application works, asking what’s new on one of the social media sites they frequently use or browsing a site they like together (if your child is amenable). • Get direct feedback from your child: Checking-in with your child on a regular basis, will be helpful in keeping a pulse on how they are responding and coping with the technology plan. Ask them what they think is working well and not going well, with assurance that there can be discussion around revising the plan or getting extra support to cope with stressors as needed. Parents and caregivers may consider teaching youth strategies to check-in with themselves (or self-monitor) before, during, and after technology use, paying attention to internal cues such as thoughts, emotions, and physical responses. Some examples of questions to consider include: does my mood regularly change before and after I am on a particular site? If so, is it in a positive or negative way? How does getting on a particular site make me feel about myself? What’s my energy level like after being online? How do I feel when I am away from my device? Teaching kids to self-monitor will help them begin to develop skills to create limits and boundaries for themselves. • Be mindful of your child’s behavior and mood in relation to technology: It is important for parents and caregivers to be aware of any types of mood or behavioral changes they are observing in youth that aren’t viewed as positive. Examples may include frequently getting irritable or sad after being on social media or having tantrums or excessive rigidity when asked to move away from a game on a tablet. These types of changes may suggest that the youth may not be engaging in technology in a healthy way and need more support. Starting with warm, direct and non-judgmental conversations may provide more clarity (e.g., “I have been noticing when you get off Facebook you tend to isolate yourself in your room and you appear sad. What’s up?”). While behavioral or mood changes may necessitate a revision to the technology plan, this may also be a developmentally appropriate opportunity to coach your child through a new hurdle that they haven’t encountered before. • Implement practical systems for reviewing your child’s activity on their device: This type of monitoring is perhaps the hardest, as one wants to ensure they are getting a snapshot of their child’s media use for safety purposes without spying. Additionally, choosing the type of monitoring systems will depend on the needs of the individual. Youth at a younger developmental level will need more and different oversight than an older or more mature youth. As previously noted, discussing monitoring with youth, especially older youth is important and helps to build trust. Some common ideas and strategies for monitoring may include:

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• sharing media experiences such as a joint email account with parents or viewing information online together (this would be appropriate for a younger child or a youth that functions at a younger developmental level) • having access to username and passwords for all media accounts • following your child’s social media accounts • setting up restrictions on devices and spot checking to ensure parental restriction features have not been disabled or modified • checking screen time features (on some phones and tablets) that enable one to see how long the youth has been on that device • using parental controls monitoring systems that can provide comprehensive support such as website blocking, content monitoring, and notify parents/caregivers about any potential concerns. • Make adjustments as needed: Parents and caregivers should anticipate the need to make ongoing changes to systems (including limits and monitoring). As youth demonstrate more competency to self-regulate and make safe decisions, parents and caregivers may consider revising plans to give them more expansive access and autonomy with technology. Conversely, youth who show evidence that they are not coping as well with the demands of technology will need adjustments made to potentially provide more limits to technology use and/or more adult support.

Conclusions Though much attention has been placed on the potential harms of screen time for children and adolescents, technology continues to become increasingly integral to our lives at home, in school, and in our communities. And while excessive use of screens threatens to interfere with important developmental activities like physical activity and in-person socialization, parents and caregivers who are mindful of both the risks and benefits of technology have the capacity to support children in learning how to self-monitor and self-regulate so that they can eventually make healthy, independent choices about balanced use of screens. Through collaborative problemsolving and authoritative parenting, families can ensure that kids have the best opportunities for positive outcomes in a technological world.

References Brooks, M., & Lasser, J. S. (2018). Tech generation: Raising balanced kids in a hyper-connected world. Oxford University Press. Claro, M., Cabello, T., San Martín, E., & Nussbaum, M. (2015). Comparing marginal effects of Chilean students’ economic, social and cultural status on digital versus reading and mathematics performance. Computers and Education, 82, 1–10.

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Courage, M. L., & Setliff, A. E. (2010). When babies watch television: Attention-getting, attentionholding, and the implications for learning from video material. Developmental Review, 30, 220–238. Darling, N. (1999). Parenting style and its correlates. ERIC Digest. Elgersma, C. (2019, October 3). Help! My kids want to use social media. Common Sense Media. https://www.commonsensemedia.org/articles/help-my-kid-wants-to-use-social-media Haidt, J., & Twenge, J.M. (2021, July 31). This is our chance to pull teenagers out of the smartphone trap. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/31/opinion/smartphone-iphone-socialmedia-isolation.html Lim, S. S. (2016). Through the tablet glass: Mobile media, cloud computing and transcendent parenting. Journal of Children and Media, 10, 21–29. Livingstone, S. K., Helsper, E. J., Lupiáñez-Villanueva, F., Veltri, G. A., & Folkvord, F. (2017). Maximizing opportunities and minimizing risks for children online: The role of digital skills in emerging strategies of parental mediation. Journal of Communication, 67, 82–105. https://doi. org/10.1111/jcom.12277 Northwestern University in Qatar. Media use in the Middle East, 2013: an eight-nation survey by Northwestern University in Qatar. (2013). Retrieved from http://menamediasurvey. northwestern.edu/ Smith, R. (n.d.). Creating a family tech plan. https://www.yourbestfamily.com. Retrieved from https://www.yourbestfamily.com/creating-a-family-tech-plan.html Twenge, J. M., Haidt, J., Blake, A. B., McAllister, C., Lemon, H., & Le Roy, A. (2021). Worldwide increases in adolescent loneliness. Journal of Adolescence. https://doi-org.libproxy.txstate. edu/10.1016/j.adolescence.2021.06.006 United Nations. (2021). With almost half of world’s population still offline, Digital divide risks becoming ‘New face of inequality’. Deputy Secretary-General Warns General Assembly. Retrieved from https://www.un.org/press/en/2021/dsgsm1579.doc.htm World Health Organization. (2019). Guidelines on physical activity, sedentary behaviour and sleep for children under 5 years of age. https://apps.who.int/iris/handle/10665/311664. World Health Organization. (2021). Excessive screen use and gaming considerations during #COVID19. Retrieved from http://www.emro.who.int/mnh/news/considerations-for-youngpeople-on-excessive-screen-use-during-covid19.html

Jon Lasser is a professor in the School Psychology Program at Texas State University. He holds a master’s degree in Human Sexuality Education from the University of Pennsylvania, and a doctorate in School Psychology from the University of Texas at Austin. He has served as Chair of the Institutional Review Board (IRB), Associate Dean for Research in the College of Education, and Program Coordinator for the School Psychology Program. His books include Tech Generation: Raising Balanced Kids in a Hyper-Connected World (Oxford University Press), School Psychologist as Counselor: a Practitioner’s Handbook (National Association of School Psychologists), and a series of social-emotional learning books with the American Psychological Association’s Magination Press (Grow Happy, Grow Grateful, Grow Kind, & What Boys Do). Jolene Ellis is a Licensed Specialist in School Psychology (LSSP) and a Nationally Certified School Psychologist (NCSP). She has spent her career in the public school system in Austin, TX and holds a specialist degree in school psychology from Texas State University.

Parents and Parenting in the COVID-19 Pandemic: A Review of the COVID-19 Literature Nicolette V. Roman

Introduction The COVID-19, severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS-CoV-2) pandemic, created unprecedented havoc globally, across all societal structures and in all contexts. It started towards the end of 2019 in Wuhan, China, as a very unassuming and contained virus with flu-like symptoms. Within weeks, the virus had spread quickly across northern countries and then filtered to the southern countries and the severity was evident in the number of recorded deaths per country. As science was trying to catch up in understanding the virus, as it expanded into global pandemic, what became clear was that there were clearly identified symptoms by the World Health Organisation (WHO, 2022) and that the virus was mainly spread through respiratory droplets and direct contact with contaminated surfaces. A special site was created on the WHO website which provides the following information regarding the symptoms of the virus: COVID-19 affects different people in different ways. Most infected people will develop mild to moderate illness and recover without hospitalization. Most Common Symptoms: • • • •

fever cough tiredness loss of taste or smell.

N. V. Roman (*) Centre for Interdisciplinary Studies of Children, Families and Society, Faculty of Community and Health Sciences, University of the Western Cape, Cape Town, South Africa e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_23

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Less Common Symptoms: • • • • • •

sore throat headache aches and pains diarrhoea a rash on skin, or discolouration of fingers or toes red or irritated eyes.

Serious Symptoms: • difficulty breathing or shortness of breath • loss of speech or mobility, or confusion • chest pain. Seek immediate medical attention if you have serious symptoms. Always call before visiting your doctor or health facility. People with mild symptoms who are otherwise healthy should manage their symptoms at home. On average it takes 5–6 days from when someone is infected with the virus for symptoms to show, however it can take up to 14 days. It became clear, as the virus spread, that having a pre-existing condition or a co-morbidity such as diabetes, hypertension and cardiovascular disorders, resulted in severe disease and hospitalisation or often death (Sahu et al., 2020). The speed at which the virus grew left devastation in its wake. After two years of living with the virus, the current statistics of the worldometer (Worldometer, 2022) indicates there are 481,662,511 coronavirus cases, 6,147,482 people have died due to the virus and 415,962,669 have recovered from the virus. While the physical and medical profiles could be clearly noted and managed under and within a health system, what became apparent was the impact of the virus on other systems such as social, economic, political and educational. The formation of this nexus is illustrated by Bambra et al. (2020) in Fig. 1. In the rush to save lives and decrease the impact of the virus, countries around the world implemented policies and strategies to prevent and intervene with the virus. The main approach was to change behaviours of people by implementing lockdown, isolation, social distancing, quarantining and sanitising. There were prominent impact factors that arose through the health pandemic based on the nexus formed with the different societal systems as countries entered into lockdown. Most prominent of these was social inequalities, those who have and are able in contrast to those who do not have and who are unable to do. These social inequalities included economic (across and within countries), race, gender, age, class, and dis/ability, which means that the most vulnerable were left unprotected (Bambra et al., 2020). For example, in a study conducted in France (Bajos et al., 2021), the working-class individuals were worst off during lockdown than the privileged class individuals, showing the economic and class differences of the impact of the virus. Similarly for gender, the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD, 2021) Risks that Matter survey of 2020 highlight the disparities in care work during the pandemic. Mothers, rather than

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Fig. 1 The syndemic [adverse interactions between diseases and social conditions] of COVID-19, non-communicable diseases (NCDs) and the social determinants of health

fathers, took on the care of the family while having to work and educate their children after schools since childcare facilities were closed. Furthermore, the impact of the virus resulted in increased unemployment, income loss, food insecurity, lack of or reduced access to resources and services. Childcare, socialising, and education were also affected (Bambra et al., 2020). These impacts also resulted in loss - of loved ones, freedom, independence and wellbeing. Thus, while containment measures were put in place to save lives, it became evident that other harms were created such as increased rates of domestic violence and increased levels of mental health challenges (Brown et al., 2020). Death of loved ones became a reality as globally the death rates increased and the tradition of caring for the sick and of preparing for funerals changed. Families could no longer do hospital visits or attend funerals of loved ones which means that the closure of ‘saying good-bye’ with the loss of a family member did not occur. The way of being and doing family changed (Adebiyi et al., 2021). COVID-19 placed all people in new fear and stressful circumstances (Kerr et al., 2021). Parents were especially fearful, stressed and anxious regarding the effects and impact of COVID-19 on their families and especially on their children.

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Changes to Routines in the Pandemic Overall, as with anyone else in the world, parents were constantly worried about their and their families’ health and safety during COVID-19. In addition to the health and safety concerns, parents were anxious and stressed with the economic crises; unfolding job security, unemployment and income were threatened. Globally changes were implemented so that individuals were more confined to their own spaces. This meant that in-person interactions were shut down or reduced to minimal. Subsequently, education institutions, play areas, sports facilities and places of work were closed and moved to remote spaces. For example, parents who were employed and worked in the office began to work from home. Children who were in nursery school/school/college/university had to adapt to home-schooling environments. The home space became a workspace, gym space, education space and play space. Parents had to adopt and adapt to a new routine to juggle working a full-time job from home, childcare, becoming a teacher for their children’s schoolwork. This included marking, explaining, normal household chores such as cooking, cleaning and even accommodating when the distance learning for their children opened and closed as they continued to have some form of school routines managed by timetable and deadlines (Fisher et al., 2020). Every single day parents experienced fear of the unknown, fear of death of a loved one and general wellbeing of the children and family, and yet not everything was doom and gloom during the changes of COVID-19.

Some Positives in the Family During COVID-19 The evidence is quite damning regarding the negative impact of the COVID-19 pandemic globally but there is evidence that there were positive experiences and positive behaviour patterns amongst families. For example, families who were not as close as they were pre-COVID, were forced to spend time with each other which resulted in forming a closer bond or relationship between partners, as well as children and parent relationships (Harkins, 2020). Research in Scotland and South Africa provide positive outcomes in self-reported evidence of experiences during lockdown during the pandemic. In a Scottish survey study with 3342 participants, positive changes were measured focusing on relationships, developing new hobbies, physical activity, quality time amongst individuals and families (Williams et al., 2021). The results show that positive changes evolved which were unintended such as spending more quality time together, increased physical activity and an appreciation for things which were previously taken for granted. Qualitative research conducted in South Africa highlights similarly that time together became a very welcomed phenomenon as families appreciated the time for reflection, sharing, re-learning about each other and taking time for personal care and wellbeing (Donga et al., 2021; October et al., 2021). For many parents full time

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working activities intersected and clashed with the education and care of the family and especially their children. There were many public health efforts to omit the transmissions of the COVID-19 virus and all its variants. These efforts had unintentional consequences that affected parental stress, child stress, parenting in general and parents who were expecting a baby (Brown et al., 2020). Thus, understanding the parent’s stress and emotions will aid in understanding how the COVID19 pandemic affected not only the parents but also their children (Kerr et al., 2021).

Parent Wellbeing in COVID-19 Humans are social beings and therefore thrive in a relational environment with others. With COVID-19, people lived in isolation during the lockdown and in quarantine when they had the virus. Though people, in general, felt the overt and covert effects of COVID-19 and were challenged to cope, parents, in particular, were the ones who needed to find a way to cope while caring for and educating their children. The ability to cope [or not] and be well, have definite implications on a child’s wellbeing (Huebener et al., 2021). In a study conducted in Germany, Huebener et al. (2021) examined the impact of COVID-19 and the associated restrictions on the wellbeing of individuals with dependent children. Their results show that individuals with children, especially younger aged children, had low satisfaction with life and family life as compared to other individuals. This was similar for parents with similar size families or larger families. They concluded that parent wellbeing decreased possibly due to the closure of schools and daycare centres but that these findings may affect child development and family stability. Similarly, in a study in Italy, Spinelli et al. (2020) found that parents who found taking care of the family and teaching their children before the pandemic were found to be more stressed during the lockdown period. Furthermore, the stress which parents experienced was at a personal level as well as in the relationship with their children because they might not be present with their children as well as being in the frame of mind to positively interact with them. A New York City study with 281 participants aimed to explore the experiences of families of young children of color during the pandemic (Ursache et al., 2022). The results show that parents had poorer mental health after schools closed than before schools closed. There were no other significant findings. In a UK study, Dawes et al. (2021) conducted a qualitative study to explore the effects of the pandemic on the mental health and wellbeing of parents with young children. The following themes evolved from their research: (1) navigation of multiple responsibilities and change inside the home; (2) disruption to home life; (3) changes to usual support networks; (4) changes in personal relationships; and (5) use of coping strategies. The challenge in their wellbeing was mainly due to having to juggle many tasks in the absence of usual support and routines but they also indicated that they used coping strategies. Kurata et al. (2021) studied parenting stress during the pandemic in India, Malaysia, Japan and the USA. They also assessed whether the parents in their

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study had previously experienced adverse childhoods. Stress had significantly increased across all countries. This was especially high for parents who had previously experienced adversity in childhood because they experienced increased feelings of fear and anxiety. Long periods of stress, anxiety and depression can affect the parenting style and the parent-child relationship itself, as it leads to neglecting the children and/or child abuse, because long periods of stress, anxiety and depression results in parents being exhausted and burnt out of energy (Mikolajczak et al., 2018). Parental anxiety and stress levels were positively correlated with children’s anxiety and stress levels and parents ended up showing more affection to their children once they noticed this correlation (Lee et al., 2021). Clearly, research evidence suggests that COVID-19 increased the stress of parents and their responsibility and because of this, they experienced a higher level of anxiety, depression, and exhaustion (Dawes et al., 2021; Nwosu, 2021; Ursache et al., 2022).

Substance Use Disorder and Parenting in COVID-19 Many people use alcohol as a coping mechanism. However, during COVID-19 it was more used for coping with the stresses of unemployment, food insecurity, children stress due to school closing, or isolation. Alcohol and substance use behaviours increased in relation to parental health and children (over the legally approved age to consume alcohol). Levels of stress, depression and anxiety was positively correlated with people who have substance and alcoholic problems. Depression, anxiety, and stress levels were higher for people who consume alcohol or substances and had a history of depression, anxiety, or stress pre-COVID. There were more men who were alcohol consumers and substance users than women (Lamar et al., 2021). The stress for men/fathers is much higher during COVID19, as they are often the breadwinners of the household (Russell et al., 2020). Alcohol might have been restricted at certain levels of COVID-19 but there were some sold illegally in communities or because of connections people had. Alcohol or substance users had a higher level of probability to violence and child or partner abuse during COVID-19 due to these extra stressors. These parents or children who are substance users and alcohol consumers, who need treatment for their disorder use to have face to face meetings and speak about their disorders. They had to also stop their meetings and move to online meetings like the school children who have no access to the internet or rely mainly on interactions to learn. There had to be a willingness from both the providers and clients (Cioffi & Leve, 2020). These programmes must have timely integration and train people rapidly. There must be continuous calls made and sponsors for airtime, minutes, data, etc. Without it, there would always be missed opportunities when working with parents and children with substance use disorders to improve parenting practices, reduce substance use, and reduce the incidence of child maltreatment (Cioffi & Leve, 2020).

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Parenting Children During COVID-19 Children will always depend on their parents in some form across their lifespan shifting from deep dependency as babies to being independent as adults but may still consult with parents on issues. Young children look for logical reasoning from their parents as they look up to their parents as their safe place to go to for emotional support, logical advice, wisdom, guidance, or when they are scared or threatened. Furthermore, the relationship between a parent and child is important because it is positively and directly proportional to the wellbeing of both the parent and the child in many ways such as physically, mentally, spiritually, or emotionally (Grossmann et al., 2008). As previously stated, COVID-19 impacted the wellbeing of parents due to increased stress and stressors, which are also affected by the children’s needs and being available to their children in times of need (Bate et al., 2021). For pregnant parents, especially mothers, stress, depression, and anxiety levels increased in addition to the normal stressors of work and finance because they were uncertain of the virus’s effects on them and their babies. According to Davenport et al. (2020) increased stress, depression and anxiety levels in pregnant women could lead to preterm delivery, reduced mother-infant bonding, and delays in the cognitive/emotional development of the infant. A reduction of stress, depression and anxiety is possible by doing or increasing physical activity but this was limited during the COVID-19 pandemic (Davenport et al., 2020). During COVID-19 it was found that pregnant women were more at risk of getting the virus as they were more likely to have a respiratory infection (which is how COVID-19 is characterized) and it affects the immune system of pregnant women which affects the health of the mother and infant (Liu et al., 2020). Fortunately, pregnant women during COVID-19 were hospitalized faster and put on ventilators than those who were not pregnant (Collin et al., 2020). Understandably, stressed pregnant mothers can transfer this to their babies and Hattangadi et al. (2020) similarly stated that when parents are stressed or their mental health is affected, their children have mental health challenges too. For birthing and new parents in South Africa during the lockdown, the experience of childbirth and being new parents was challenging. These challenges included that they could not choose the method of giving birth, reported worst experiences of giving birth, were less likely to have skin-to-skin contact post-delivery and were unable to have someone with them when giving birth. Mothers reported less support, more negative emotions about their babies, delays in registering their babies and difficulties in purchasing baby goods (Farley et al., 2021). These were all accommodations made for COVID-19 restrictions. For parents of young children, 5 years and younger, there are often more challenges than for parents of children with older children. For example, in a South African study, 13,224 parents (caring for 18,858 children younger than 5 years) participated in a survey launched on a zero-cost mobile application to assess the challenges families experience during COVID-19. The challenges included disruptions in childcare, missed clinic visits, feeding challenges, difficulties in

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showing affection, behavioural challenges and violence in the home. The results show 82% of parents experienced at least one challenge, 69% indicated that disruption in childcare was the most common challenge, 50% had difficulties in feeding their children and 41% were challenged in showing affection. In addition to fear of infection, stress, tension and depression, as indicated in other studies, this sample of participants also experienced a lack of money and negative affect in the home. The groups particularly challenged in this sample were fathers and parents living in rural communities. They reported higher levels of violence towards children in the home. Families during COVID-19 were able to access government support, especially in townships and rural areas (Naicker & Richter, 2022). In terms of older children, the shift from schooling and working in school and in the office to studying and working from home allowed parents and children to spend more time with each other. Time became important to mend or improve relationships, reflect and consider how to be more family (Kezia et al., 2022). But time in a setting or situation which is stressful and anxiety-provoking could affect how people interact with each other. COVID-19 presented not only the stress and distress of the effects of the virus, it also had additional stressors such as marital conflict, unemployment, reduced income, loss of loved ones and fear of death (Chung et al., 2020a, b). COVID-19 presents this situation for the parent-child relationship.

Negative Parenting Practices During COVID-19 While there is not too much literature on parenting approaches in COVID-19, the evidence shows both positive and negative perspectives. For example, Freisthler et al. (2021) conducted a study in 2020 amongst 323 participants in Central Ohio measuring the use of aggressive/harsh discipline by parents during the lockdown period. The results show that aggressive parenting was more likely to increase by 1.3 times as stress levels of parenting increased. Furthermore, if a parent had used aggressive or harsh parenting at the start of the study, the likelihood of increased aggressive or harsh parenting was 3 times greater. This example of the positive relationship between parental stress and distress during COVID-19 and harsh parenting and neglect was found to be similar in other studies too in Singapore (Chung et al., 2020a, b), USA (Connell & Strambler, 2021) and Spain (Romero et al., 2020). Similarly, a conceptual study conducted with Multiple Indicator Cluster Surveys conducted in Nigeria, Mongolia and Suriname estimated the effect of COVID-19 on violent discipline in the home. The results estimate a 35%–46% increase in violent discipline in all three countries during the COVID pandemic. Furthermore, attitudes supportive of physical punishment predicted violent discipline potentially being linked to unhappiness amongst children in the home. In Mongolia, female children and older-aged children received less violent discipline. In Suriname, female and older age children and increased levels of happiness in the household were identified as protective factors.

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Harsh parenting practices fall within the umbrella of Baumrind’s parenting style of authoritarian parenting. As a parenting practice, harsh parenting has been described as controlling, aggressive, punitive, neglectful and with withdrawal of love (Baumrind, 1967). There are prolific research studies exploring this parenting practice and its deleterious effects on developing children and adults (Chung et al., 2020a, b; Connell & Strambler, 2021; Pinquart, 2017). Children who have been parented within harsh parenting practices portray externalising and internalising behaviours (Baumrind, 1967; Romero et al., 2020). The concern is that the harsh parenting approach is a risk factor for injuring children, harsher child abuse and could result in fatalities. This approach has been shown to have long term negative developmental effects on children and negatively affects the parent-child relationship (Chung et al., 2020a, b). When parents are stressed, they become disconnected from their children and the behaviour of their children becomes more reactive and negative. This sets off a bi-directional and reciprocally negative relationship between the parent and child. Hattangadi et al. (2020) explain the negative cycle of this parent-child relationship in the following way: Parents under stress are less likely to be engaged, more irritable and distant with their young children. . .A lack of early parental nurturance, parental negativity or over-reactivity can impact emotional and behavioural development in children and have deleterious long-term consequences including, but not limited to, negative adjustment outcomes (e.g. socialemotional and peer difficulties), and increased risk for mental health and substance use problems as they grow older.

Parents become less responsive to their children and less close with their children (Chung et al., 2020a, b). The COVID-19 research shows that parents faced cumulative stressors which became determinants of increased stress and anxiety levels. Brown et al. (2020) identified 12 stressors for parents during the pandemic. These stressors included (1) loss of employment or income/ inability to provide for family, (2) uncertainty about the future, (3) inability to see family or friends or socialize with others, (4) relationship difficulties, (5) general stress and feeling tired, (6) poor mental health, (7) poor physical health, (8) meltdowns and/or boredom from children, (9) difficulties managing children’s academics, (10) fear of contracting the virus or hearing about people dying from the virus, (11) lack of supports, and (12) difficulties managing work from home.

However, while, the research portrays the negative parenting approaches globally during COVID-19, Brown et al. (2020) also provide positive parenting effects during COVID-19.

Positive Parenting Approaches During COVID-19 Studies of positive parenting practices during COVID-19 found that when parents perceived themselves to be in control, they perceived their environments to be less stressful and subsequently interacted positively with their children (Brown et al., 2020). Perceived control of the environment and support have been shown to

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improve parenting practices. Lippold et al. (2018) conducted a longitudinal study of 636 two-parent families living in rural communities with the aim of determining if parenting behaviours, parent-child warmth and hostility changed after six months. Their results show that parents with greater perceived control were consistent in their positive parenting and increased social support and improved parental warmth in the parent-child relationship. Perceived control affects satisfaction with life and general health and wellbeing (Zheng et al., 2020) and predicts adaptive behaviours (Ștefan et al., 2021) acting as a protective factor. It was a mechanism to cope during COVID19 (Zheng et al., 2020) potentially because individuals adapted to the regulations. Similarly, Cohodes et al. (2021) found that parents were buffers for their children during the pandemic, thereby reducing their stress. In being a buffer, parents would emotionally socialise their children, have routines at home and be available to discuss the pandemic. Routines in the family provide consistency and structure for children which children experience as feeling safe (Grolnick et al., 2014).

Effects of COVID-19 on Children In the previous parts of this chapter, the discussion has mainly focused on the effects of COVID-19 on parents, but children globally have also been affected by COVID-19. Education institutions closed and children had to adapt to homeschooling and online learning. Children were unable to meet with friends and other family members outside of the home environment. A study conducted with 2672 parents living in Germany focused on the lockdown effects on both parents and children (Christner et al., 2021). The results show that both parents and children experienced general stress. For children, their general satisfaction with life was negatively related to the feeling of being stressed and missing other children and friends. Furthermore, children indicated they were irritated and lonely, they could not meet family and friends, play sports or engage in physical activity or other leisure activities as before and experienced more disagreements in the family. This study also compared single-parent families with non-single parent families as well as only children and children with siblings. The results of this part of the study suggest that children from single-parent families showed more emotional symptoms than children in non-single families. Only children had more emotional symptoms and hyperactivity/inattention than children with siblings (Christner et al., 2021). Children generally have huge amounts of energy which they expound in the playground, sports activities or just keeping busy. During COVID-19 this all changed as they became more confined to their home spaces and therefore did not have access to the more open spaces of schools, sports fields and playgrounds. Their parents became their teachers and there was a different practice of structure in the home, as parents had to work which meant they could be more distracted potentially offering less attention. This may have been especially challenging for children of single parents because they may not have had access to resources and support as they previously had before COVID-19. In addition, parents were more stressed than normal and

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children could feel or experience it. Similar findings emanated from a three-country study between Italy, Spain and Portugal. The intention of the study was to describe and compare the psychological and behavioural symptoms of 1480 children and adolescents during the pandemic (Franscisco et al., 2020). This study also highlighted the increased patterns of screen time and sleep hours at night. Children and adolescents in Italy had fewer psychological and behavioural symptoms when compared to children and adolescents in Portugal and Spain. The authors suggest that children in Italy could have had more time to adjust to the restrictions as their lockdown period started before Portugal and Spain. The authors suggest that children in Italy could have had more time to adjust to the restrictions as their lockdown period started before Portugal and Spain. In a study conducted in China with 6435 adolescents, the study investigated the prevalence of depressive symptoms in relation to study-relevant problems (difficulty in studying at home, dislike of remote learning and screen entertainment greater than 8 h/day) and parent-child relationships. Of the participants, 17.7% had depressive symptoms and these were associated with a number of study problems and poor parent-child relationships (Wang et al., 2021). Although this chapter focuses on the parent-child relationship, children and adolescents became vulnerable during COVID-19 with the loss of a parent or parents or caregivers. Hillis et al. (2021) used mortality and fertility data to estimate COVID19-associated deaths of primary and secondary caregivers of children younger than 18 years in 21 countries. The primary and secondary caregivers included grandparents. Based on the data from 21 countries, 862,365 children had been orphaned or lost a custodial grandparent due to COVID-19. Most of the children had lost one parent and 355,283 children had lost a grandparent or older kin. Furthermore, South Africa, Peru, USA, India, Brazil and Mexico had the highest numbers of children who had lost a primary caregiver. The loss of a parent is traumatizing for children and even more so if they lose a grandparent too. Children who are orphaned are vulnerable to exploitation, abuse, poverty, mental ill-health and the possibility of institutional care. These aspects ultimately affect the development of children which may result in maladaptive behaviour.

Recommendations As the COVID-19 studies emerged, a focus on the parent-child relationship and parenting emerged as well. Very quickly, various organisations globally provided interventions and guidelines for parents to manage themselves and their children during the pandemic. The focus of these interventions was not only to improve the parent-child relationship but also to protect children in the home. As additional information, the following are recommended:

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• It became clear that COVID-19 removed all support for parents and especially single moms. This became challenging as parents had to continue with their work, family and childcare. Efforts should be made to establish strong supportive structures within families. This could be secondary caregivers to primary caregivers within the family. Although social and physical distancing was key in the regulations, a neighbour could help to support parents through very difficult times. • Government should find ways of supporting parents and families during crises. There should be a special plan to do this specifically in a crisis, especially with transitioning from in-person environments to confined home spaces. There should never be an assumption that parents have the abilities and capabilities to teach their children from home. This is especially for marginalised children, parents and families especially families where family members are differentlyabled or live in adverse environments. • Parents, especially parents who have experienced adverse childhoods, require interventions and support to cope with periods of stress so that they are able to parent more positively. • Trauma-based care is paramount and should be readily accessible for children, parents and families. Community-based organisations should be strengthened, outside of a crisis moment, so that they are ready to support children, parents and families in their communities especially when there is no other support available.

Conclusion This chapter provides a review of studies conducted on parents and children during the COVID-19 pandemic. The studies include western and non-western studies. The thread through all the studies was that both parents and children were affected by the COVID-19 pandemic specifically in terms of mental health. Parents were stressed, anxious and fearful and their children mirrored this. Parents were required to work, teach, cook and clean simultaneously and had reduced care support. For children, being confined to the home space meant that they did not have the freedom to move around and play. They, therefore, became more agitated, had reduced concentration and attention levels. Ultimately, parents were challenged to manage all their responsibilities of work and care within the space of stress, anxiety and fear which resulted in parents using harsh parenting approaches. There were parents who used more positive parenting approaches because they enjoyed the time with their children and felt they had control of their situations but these studies were fewer than the studies focusing on harsher parenting approaches.

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Naicker, S. N., & Richter, L. M. (2022). Parenting amid COVID-19: Challenges and supports for families with young children in South Africa. South African Journal of Child Health, 16(1). https://doi.org/10.7196/SAJCH.2022.v16i1.1889 Nwosu, C. O. (2021). Childcare and depression during the coronavirus pandemic in South Africa: A gendered analysis. PLoS One, 16(8), e0255183. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0255183 October, K. R., Petersen, L. R., Adebiyi, B., Rich, E., & Roman, N. V. (2021). COVID-19 daily realities for families: A South African sample. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 19(1), 221. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph19010221 Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD). (2021). Risks that matter 2020: The long reach of COVID-19. OECD policy responses to Coronavirus (COVID-19). OECD Publishing. https://doi.org/10.1787/44932654-en Pinquart, M. (2017). Associations of parenting dimensions and styles with externalizing problems of children and adolescents: An updated meta-analysis. Developmental Psychology, 53(5), 873–932. https://doi.org/10.1037/dev0000295 Romero, E., López-Romero, L., Domínguez-Álvarez, B., Villar, P., & Gómez-Fraguela, J. A. (2020). Testing the effects of COVID-19 confinement in Spanish cChildren: The role of parents' distress, emotional problems and specific parenting. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(19), 6975. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph17196975 Russell, B. S., Hutchison, M., Tambling, R., Tomkunas, A. J., & Horton, A. L. (2020). Initial challenges of caregiving during COVID-19: Caregiver burden, mental health, and the parentchild relationship. Child Psychiatry and Human Development, 51(5), 671–682. https://doi.org/ 10.1007/s10578-020-01037-x Sahu, K. K., Mishra, A. K., & Lal, A. (2020). Trajectory of the COVID-19 pandemic: Chasing a moving target. Annals of Translational Medicine, 8(11), 694. https://doi.org/10.21037/atm20-2793 Spinelli, M., Lionetti, F., Pastore, M., & Fasolo, M. (2020). Parents' stress and children's psychological problems in families facing the COVID-19 outbreak in Italy. Frontiers in Psychology, 11, 1713. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.01713 Ștefan, S., Fodor, L., Curt, I., Ionescu, A., Pantea, N., Jiboc, N., & Tegzesiu, A. (2021). Health anxiety, perceived risk and perceived control in following recommended preventive measures during early COVID-19 response in Romania. BJ Psych Open, 7(5), E160. https://doi.org/10. 1192/bjo.2021.990 Ursache, A., Barajas-Gonzalez, R. G., Adhikari, S., Kamboukos, D., Brotman, L. M., & DawsonMcClure, S. (2022). A quasi-experimental study of parent and child well-being in families of color in the context of COVID-19 related school closure. SSM - Population Health, 17, 101053. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ssmph.2022.101053 Wang, J., Wang, H., Lin, H., Richards, M., Yang, S., Liang, H., Chen, X., & Fu, C. (2021). Study problems and depressive symptoms in adolescents during the COVID-19 outbreak: Poor parentchild relationship as a vulnerability. Globalization and Health, 17(1), 1–9. https://doi.org/10. 1186/s12992-021-00693-5 Williams, L., Rollins, L., Young, D., Fleming, L., Grealy, M., Janssen, X., Kirk, A., MacDonald, B., & Flowers, P. (2021). What have we learned about positive changes experienced during COVID-19 lockdown? Evidence of the social patterning of change. PLoS One, 16(1), e0244873. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0244873 World Health Organisation (WHO). (2022). Coronavirus disease (COVID-19). https://www.who. int/health-topics/coronavirus#tab=tab_3 Worldometer. (2022). COVID-19 Coronavirus Pandemic. https://www.worldometers.info/ coronavirus/ Zheng, L., Miao, M., & Gan, Y. (2020). Perceived control buffers the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic on general health and life satisfaction: The mediating role of psychological distance. Applied Psychology. Health and Well-Being, 12(4), 1095–1114. https://doi.org/10.1111/aphw. 12232

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Nicolette V. Roman, PhD, is a South African Research Chair in the Development of Human Capabilities and Social Cohesion through the Family, the PI in Early Childhood Development (UWC), an Established Researcher in the Centre for Interdisciplinary Studies of Children, Families and Society (CISCFS), at the University of the Western Cape (UWC). She is the founder of CISCFS. Professor Roman is a Visiting Professor at the University of Huddersfield (UK). Her research focuses on family life, strengthening capable families through the family-parent-child relationship across the lifespan ultimately achieving family and social cohesion. She has published has published quite extensively both locally and internationally. She currently leads a COVID-19 project exploring Family Life during COVID-19 and has co-authored Chapter 8 of the Country Report on Covid-19 focusing on Civil Society.

Parent-Child/Adolescent Relationships During the COVID-19 Pandemic Ally Laila Murphy, Kevin Ray Bush, and Jayne Elise Jurasek

The Impact of COVID-19 on Parent-Child and Parent-Adolescent Relationships The World Health Organization (WHO) declared COVID-19 as a pandemic on March 11, 2020. Since then, as of April 7, 2022 the WHO (https://covid19.who. int) reported that globally there have been almost 500 million confirmed cases worldwide (493,392,853) including over six million deaths (6,165,833). By April 2020, a restriction period, also known as lockdowns or stay-at-home orders, had been implemented in numerous countries worldwide to curb the spread of the COVID-19 virus (SARS-CoV-2). More than 188 countries had some form of school closure, placing over 1.5 billion children and adolescents out of schools (UNSDG, 2020). The COVID-19 virus has wreaked havoc on individuals and families globally through the direct impact of the illness and the influence of responses to the virus by individuals, families, businesses, and governments at various levels (Liu & Doan, 2020). Critical disruptions from COVID-19 include coping with the illness and health consequences and/or the fear of infection (self and children), and social (physical) distancing to slow the spread of the virus, which led to the closure of most PK-12 schools and universities, and many places of employment, except for those in “essential positions” (e.g., health care, food service, law enforcement), leaving a record number of people out of work (UNICEF, 2020). This situation resulted in many families being largely confined to their homes for several months,

A. L. Murphy (*) · J. E. Jurasek Education and Society, Miami University, Hamilton, OH, USA e-mail: [email protected] K. R. Bush Educational Psychology, Family Science and Social Work, Miami University, Oxford, OH, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_24

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with parents out of work or working from home while supervising their children and guiding their education. The restrictions meant being confined in the same space, which resulted in spending more time with families. While spending more quality time with family certainly had positive benefits for children and parents (Mousavi, 2020; Riany & Morawska, 2021; Tarsuslu et al., 2021), the feeling of being “locked-in,” within constant close proximity of family members with little to few options to take time off away from each other, while juggling between work along with responsibilities for their children’s education can lead to parental stress (Fegert & Schulze, 2020; Shockley et al., 2021). Not only that, parents also have to handle the stressors related to the pandemic- to inform, explain, and reassure their children during these uncertain times, while the parents may be having fear and anxiety themselves. These accumulative factors can result in psychological distress for all family members (Fegert et al., 2020) and affect parent-child relationships. In addition to impacting children and adolescents through responses to mitigate infection rates, many children and adolescents lost parents or other caregivers during the pandemic. Based on data from 21 countries up through April of 2021, Hillis et al. (2021) estimated that over 1,334,000 children below the age of 18 experienced the death of a primary caregiver. Considering this estimate only included 21 countries and was conducted early in the pandemic, it is likely that many more children and youth have experienced the death of a caregiver related to COVID-19. Experiencing the death of a caregiver unexpectedly and during childhood or adolescence can be particularly difficult (Gray et al., 2022; Hillis et al., 2021). Experiencing the death of a parent can place children and adolescents at greater risk of experiencing internalizing and externalizing problems. Given the COVID-19 restrictions in many countries related to social distancing, the typical mourning and support processes were disrupted for most (Asgari et al., 2022; Gray et al., 2022). For example, in a phenomenological study of 15 Iranian adolescents, Asgari et al. (2022) found that prohibition of hospital visits and other necessary health protocols had a negative impact on teens who experienced the death of a caregiver because of COVID-19. Scholars and practitioners advocate for recognition of “Pandemic Orphans” in order to help provide the necessary support (Asgari et al., 2022; Gray et al., 2022; Hillis et al., 2021).

Parent-Child Relationships The quality of the parent-child relationship can play an important role in reducing the repercussions of pandemic stress, thereby maintaining parents’ and children’s emotional wellbeing (e.g., Wang et al., 2021a). The impacts of the pandemic on the parent-child relationship vary based on children’s ages and developmental stages, gender, socioeconomic status (income and education), mental health and the broader sociocultural context in which families are embedded.

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Age/Developmental Stages: Parent-Younger Child Relationship Although younger children have the lowest risk for contracting COVID-19 and usually have minor symptoms if they do (Dong et al., 2020), the increased issues related to their mental health during the pandemic are alarming. A previous study during the H1N1 influenza pandemic suggests that children and adolescents were more likely than their adult counterparts to have moderate to severe concerns (Page et al., 2011). The pandemic has also disrupted their routines and restricted access to peers (Asgari et al., 2022; Gray et al., 2022). The challenges of parents with younger children may be different than for parents with adolescents. Younger children may demand more attention. The lockdown took away the possibility of childcare for many, which is one reason why many parents had to stay home. Additionally, some types of employment shut down or moved work online. This can also create more financial burdens for the family. Parents who were fortunate to be able to work from home, on the other hand, faced the stress of juggling multiple tasks while managing their job duties (Prime et al., 2020). If the children are already starting school, the younger ones usually need more help with their online school. The parents had to step in and monitor their children while learning online. On the other hand, parents who are essential workers, for example, may not be able to be there for their children. Tang and Azmi (2020) claimed that many front liners in Malaysia who worked at the hospitals chose to distance themselves from their children for fear of infecting their loved ones, which took away a sense of security and stability in the children’s lives. On top of that, studies conducted in several countries (e.g., China, Italy, and Spain) show that children were reported to experience higher levels of emotional, self-regulatory, and behavioral problems compared to pre-COVID-19 (Jiao et al., 2020, Orgilés et al., 2020). Thus the pandemic created even more stress for parents. A study in Italy found that parents of children ages 2 to 14 experienced more difficulties due to the lockdown, level of household chaos, demand for involvement in their child’s daily life, and children’s emotional regulation competencies (Spinelli et al., 2021). A study in 2008 involving 296 children in Sri Lanka suggests that ongoing political conflict, followed by a massive tsunami in December of 2004 heightened children’s anxiety and many of them showed symptoms of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) (Catani et al., 2008). On the other hand, a plethora of studies discusses the importance of the parentchild relationship serving as a protective factor during stressful times. For example, collaborative family activities such as playing games and doing housework together and maintaining routines such as eating meals together, has shown to support positive family interactions (Li et al., 2020). Riany and Morawska (2021), in their study involving 354 Indonesian parents of child(ren) between 2–10 years of age found that greater positive family interactions became a protective factor for children and increased the children’s competencies. Another study involving 521 parents with children aged 4–18 years old in Turkey suggests that 44% of the parents stated that the lockdown period strengthened their relationship with their children.

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Additionally, 56.4% of the parents also reported that the lockdown period provided the parents with the opportunity to take better care of their children (Tarsuslu et al., 2021). Mousavi (2020) suggests that due to the family-based Iranian society, parents reported that the quarantine period provided them more leisure time with their families. Parents were reported to have planned intellectual and group games, competitions, and coached their children as compensation for absence at school. Staying home provided the capacity to pay more attention to housework and their children. Another study found that the quality of the parent-child relationship is a protective factor for both parents’ and children’s wellbeing (Bate et al., 2021). Gambin et al. (2020) study on 228 Polish mothers and 231 Polish fathers found that parenting self-efficacy and social support were the primary influencers of positive parent-child relationships during the lockdown.

Age/Developmental Stages: Parent-Adolescent Relationship The pandemic especially affects families with adolescent children, a period of development when they are already in a turbulent period of their lives (Brock & Laifer, 2020). This period can be particularly stressful given their simultaneous physical, cognitive, and psychosocial changes. Adolescents were also found to be highly reactive to stress due to hormonal and brain development changes (Eiland & Romeo, 2013; Brown et al., 2020). The pandemic may have exacerbated these naturally occurring stressors, such as loss of education time, limited regular interaction with peers, and disruption of daily routines (Fegert et al., 2020). These adolescents are going through an intensified version of what is considered typical stressors while coping with pandemic-related stressors such as anxiety about the infection, quarantine, illness or loss of family members, and economic instability (Brooks et al., 2020; Polizzi et al., 2020). Developmental theorists often refer to adolescence as a period of storm and stress (Casey et al., 2010) due to rapid physical and hormonal changes. G.S. Hall (1904) described adolescence as a period of “storm and stress,” referring to the physical and chemical changes that create “neural mismatch” (Bailen et al., 2019). Arnett (1999) highlighted three aspects of storm and stress: conflicts with parents, mood disruptions, and risky behavior. Although they noted that not every adolescent will go through this, it is more likely to happen during adolescence than in any life period. Bülow et al. (2021) found that, especially in the initial phases of the pandemic, adolescents were reported to be spending more time with their parents and less time with their friends. This is challenging, especially since, in this period in life, adolescents begin to strive for greater independence from their caregivers in an effort to assert their developing autonomy (Steinberg, 1990). As adolescents increasingly prioritize friendship and increase autonomy, the pandemic may have heightened the sense of loneliness and increased conflicts with parents (i.e., compliance with COVID-19 health guidelines, not being able to go out with friends, babysitting younger siblings while parents are working). As parent-adolescent relationships

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become more egalitarian, this created more fractions as this assertion usually comes in the form of conflicts (Branje et al., 2012). Typically, an egalitarian parentadolescent relationship also means decreased support (Mastrotheodoros et al., 2019) and control (Keijsers et al., 2009) from the parents to accommodate the increasing autonomy of their adolescent child. Many social media platforms serve as news outlets for adolescents and can provide educational value on current news and events. Due to isolation and stayat-home orders, many adolescents took to communicating virtually, whether that be through texting, video calls, or social media (Juvonen et al., 2022). Parent-child relationships can be negatively impacted by the connection between friendships and social media for similar reasons. The connection between both is that adolescents can be more independent, yet susceptible to both friends and social media outlets. Both provide adolescents with their own space, separate from their families, and allow them to learn more about themselves in an environment outside of their home. Parent-child relationships may experience strain or stress as social media and friendships become more prevalent in the lives of adolescents (Hamilton et al., 2020). The act of juggling between work and family has always been known to stress families and create conflicts, leading to parent and child mental health issues (Vahedi et al., 2019). However, the additional co-occurring stressor during the pandemic may have pushed families to the edge. More time together can also create more negative interactions as they navigate living in proximity for an extended period of time. These negative interactions consisting of daily hassles are thought to have an important function in developing a more egalitarian relationship between parents and adolescents (Branje et al., 2012). However, when parents are already pushed to the edge of their resources, the stress and the changing environment and family routines can significantly affect parent-adolescent relationships (Masarik & Conger, 2017). For example, in a study involving families affected by the tsunami in 2004, they found that families reported more conflict when they were not able to talk openly about their experiences within their family (Lindgaard et al., 2009). Hafstad et al. (2012) also found that parents who were impacted by the tsunami in 2004 experienced reduced capacity to provide care for their children. Another study on changes in parenting and parent-child relationship quality pre-and during COVID19 period found that the parent-adolescent relationship quality was less warm and supportive, contrary to the expectations that spending more time together might increase relational warmth and involvement (Donker et al., 2021). On the other hand, Tang et al. (2021) suggest that adolescents who had discussions with their parents about COVID-19 experienced less depression, anxiety, and stress. The parents from families who experience high levels of COVID-19 related stress may have experienced difficulty navigating the new parenting challenges (Masten & Motti-Stefanidi, 2020), which can affect parent-child relationship quality. Shen et al. (2021) found that the higher family chaos, the more likely that it predicts negative life changes for adolescents. Adolescents who reported higher conflict with parents during the pandemic also reported higher depressive symptoms and life satisfactions, while adolescents who perceived less parental conflict reported improved life changes. Adolescents who perceived more social support were also found to have

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better adjustments (Ni et al., 2020). However, they also reported that parental stress did not predict the life change of their adolescents in their study, mainly due to the parents’ beliefs about not talking about their concerns and fears with their children. In another study, many parents reported less positive parenting (Donker et al., 2021), perhaps due to the more-than-usual time together, which might mean more arguments on daily hassles. These conflicts between adolescents and parents became less avoidable, resulting in a decline in warmth (Branje, 2018). In a cross-cultural study between China, Italy, and the Netherlands, Riem et al. (2021) found that in China, support from the father and grandparents of the mothers serves as a protective factor for maternal harsh parenting. They also found that in the Netherlands and China (but not Italy,) work-related stressors can be a risk factor to exacerbate maternal harsh parenting. On the other hand, perceived social support from parents during a challenging time can help them cope and maintain their psychosocial wellbeing (Cicchetti & Rogosch, 2002), especially during uncontrollably high periods of stress (RodriguezLlanes et al., 2013). Parental social support in the time of COVID-19 may be a critical component of positive adolescent adjustment, as stay-at-home orders limit adolescents’ peer networks. Shen et al. (2021) suggest that parent-adolescent interaction is shown to play a pivotal role in affecting adolescents’ wellbeing. When facing adversities, prosocial (Luthar, 2006) and secure parent-child relationships (McMahon & Maxwell, 2021) have been found to buffer against stress and increase resiliency. Parental social support directly impacts adolescents, particularly during exposure to mass trauma (Dimitry, 2012). A study in 2008 by Bokszczanin shows that parental support is one of the main protective factors against posttraumatic stress in adolescents after a natural disaster. Donker et al. (2021) found fewer negative interactions between parents and adolescents despite the decrease in warmth due to prolonged time spent together. As mentioned earlier, adolescents begin to strive for greater independence from their caregivers in an effort to assert their developing autonomy (Steinberg, 1990). Donker et al. (2021) suggest that the lockdown to reduce contact to slow the spread of COVID may have reduced the need to discuss frequent conflict issues such as going out and spending time with friends, as well as a less strict routine of getting up early to go to school and sports- the usual spat between parents and adolescents (De Goede et al., 2009). In another study, over half (51.8%) of the sample of 4391 children in Shanghai, China, reported the home quarantine as a positive experience (Tang et al., 2021). The study implied that this is due to the communication with their parents, citing that 84.7% of them discussed the pandemic with their parents.

Gender A study using a sample of 219 mothers and fathers in Turkey found that gender does not make a difference in the father-child relationship. On the other hand, gender (particularly girls) is significant in the mother-child relationship (Uzun et al., 2021).

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Mothers were found to have a positive relationship and better communication with their girls. Interestingly, although the western studies (e.g., the Netherlands, Belgium) found higher conflicts during the COVID lockdown (e.g., Verweij et al., 2021, Janssens et al., 2021), the studies conducted in eastern cultures (e.g., Saudi Arabia, Pakistan) found higher closeness level and lower conflicts, particularly between mothers and their children, compared to before the lockdown (Andejany et al., 2020; Bilal et al., 2021). Campione-Barr and colleagues found that females reported higher levels of anxiety and depressive symptoms during COVID-19. They also suggest that a positive relationship with mothers lowered depression symptoms during COVID19, while a positive relationship with fathers was associated with less problem behavior (Campione-Barr et al., 2021). Another study using 2544 Chinese parentadolescent dyads suggests that from their 50.16% of girls between the age of 10–19 sample, the girls are more likely to have experienced a higher rate of mental illness and internalizing problems during the pandemic as compared to boys (Shen et al., 2021).

Socioeconomic Status (SES) As mentioned earlier, one of the prominent impacts of COVID-19 is on family finances (Sharma et al., 2021; Wang et al., 2021b). A recent review of 84 studies across 22 countries concluded that children and adolescents living in families with low socioeconomic status experienced a higher risk of stress and depression during COVID-19, whereas higher socioeconomic status served as a protective factor (Sharma et al., 2021). In a study of 447 parent-adolescent dyads, Wang et al. (2021b) found that low-income families were more likely to lose their jobs or being able to work from home as compared to middle and high-income families. They also found that parents who lose their jobs are more likely to experience parentchild conflict, resulting in a decrease in child positive affect and increases in child negative affect. On the other hand, parents who are fortunate to work from home reported an increase in parental warmth, which in turn increases child positive affect and decreases child negative affect (Wang et al., 2021b). Another aspect that should be taken into consideration is living conditions, especially during the lockdown. This presents particular challenges for families with lower SES if they are living in a small and crowded space. Parents who reported living in a chaotic and less organized home perceive their relationship with their children to be more stressful and less enjoyable (Spinelli et al., 2021). Lower SES families are more likely to be overwhelmed with the financial stress and the uncertainty of the situation. Parents who reported a higher level of stress were less engaged with their children, paid less attention as well as spent less time with them. In another study, mothers’ level of education affects the parent-child relationship, particularly in discipline, autonomy, participation, and role subscales within a sample of Turkish adolescents. Interestingly, there is no significant difference

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based on the father’s level of education (Uzun et al., 2021). This may be true since mothers are more likely to be involved in their children’s educational needs while they are in online school at home. The study also reported that 21 mothers out of 219 participants claimed that they took care of the child on their own, 155 out of 219 claimed that both parents took care of the children, but that the mother is more likely to. Only two fathers took care of their children more frequently than the mothers, while 41 claim they both equally cared for the children. In this study, they found that mothers with higher education levels set more limits on their children (discipline), impose less control (autonomy), and they also actively participate in their children’s activities. Higher educated mothers also tend to work together with the fathers and better fulfill their maternal roles (Uzun et al. 2021). The risk related to lower SES could also be higher due to the lack of access to healthcare and/or living and working conditions that predispose them to even worse outcomes (Tai et al., 2020). The impact of COVID-19 also varies depending on the resources and responses to the pandemic of their local community and government. For example, in the United Nations report in March of 2020, countries such as El Salvador, Haiti, Honduras, Nepal, Tonga, Tajikistan, and Kyrgyzstan, heavily rely on remittances. Large scale job losses among migrant workers had secondary effects on these developing countries, which further weaken their already fragile macroeconomic situation. This makes it even more difficult for these countries to be prepared for COVID with the little resources they have to equip themselves with proper hygiene and sanitation standards. Volatility, market tampering, and stockpiling in these countries also affect food prices and are usually impacting the most vulnerable in the population (UNDSG, 2020). Around 1.5 billion students in 195 countries were unable to attend school due to worldwide closures (Tadesse & Muluye, 2020). The duration of these closures varied widely (Buonsenso et al., 2021) as illustrated in Fig. 1 (UNESCO, 2021). The United Nations reported that 166 countries implemented country-wide school and university closures, with more than 1.52 billion children and youth being out of school due to the pandemic (UNDSG, 2020). However, being completely online is

Fig. 1 Total duration of school closures during COVID-19 lockdown. (UNESCO, 2021)

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not feasible for all families. Around 4.66 billion people worldwide have access to the internet, which is about 59.5% of the world’s population (Johnson, 2021). According to International Telecommunication Union (ITU), an estimated 3.6 billion people do not have access to the internet, with the majority of them living in the least developed countries (UNDSG, 2020). This, however, results in about 40% of the world’s population who had to adapt to the pandemic without technology or the internet to assist them through it. Schools are not all equipped with the same technology on a global scale, therefore some students who do not have access to technology at home are unable to keep up with their educational materials if they are not also provided with technology through their school. COVID-19 only helped to further the socioeconomic gap as many students in rural and lower-income areas had less access to technology, the internet, and school resources. Low-income families remain at a disadvantage when it came to online schooling and ensuring that their students had access to the materials that they need to remain on track with their education. In some rural communities, in this instance Ethiopia, adolescents may be required to assist their parents with labor in order to support their families, taking priority over their schooling (Tiruneh, 2020). Additionally, parents themselves have not received formal education and thus have less capacity to provide support for a virtual education for their children. Not only are the students of low socioeconomic families at a disadvantage when it comes to learning, but their parents are as well. In Indonesia, for example, supports for parenting and homeschooling are not accessible for families with low incomes and financial and work burdens (Putra et al., 2020). In addition to the lack of access to technology, there is also a lack of monitoring to ensure that students are engaged in the learning environment. In private schools, teachers will often send school materials to parents through email or social media platforms, allowing the parents to stay engaged with their children throughout the online learning process (Tadesse & Muluye, 2020). Low-income families are not given the same advantages in this instance when it comes to assisting their children with schooling. Without already having the technology available or internet access at home, parents were unable to help their children and be engaged to the extent that they would correspond through social media with teachers to track their progress and assignments. On top of not being able to receive proper education, The World Food Program (WFP) estimated that more than 320 million primary school children in 120 countries missed out on school meals by March of 2020 (UNDSG, 2020). Sadly, continuous disruption of education also led to a rise in child labor and child marriage. In a study of 23 participants in Indonesia, the teenagers married early to escape from schoolwork, house chores, and the stress and boredom of studying and staying at home during the pandemic. The author also reported it might be due to economic problems that trigger parents to marry their children at a young age (Rahiem, 2021). Online schooling during the pandemic has demonstrated how difficult it is to acclimate to new changes without face-to-face interaction while trying to maintain our usual routines. For teachers, students, and parents all around the world, having to rely on technology in order to continue one’s education is not as successful when

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nearly 40% of the population lives without access to technology. This barrier alone adds tremendous pressure and stress to students who are already experiencing so much change in their environments at such a young age. Stress and pressure in the household do not stop with the students; the parents will feel these negative effects as well. Families who were stuck in quarantine with each other already experienced little to no interactions with people outside of their immediate families. Adding the stressful routines of online schooling and working from home into the household only added to the pandemic stressors. As these stressors spill over into family life, negative effects will be present in marital, sibling, and parent-child relationships (Hussong et al., 2022). There are many factors at play due to the pandemic that cause the increase of stress in the parent-child relationship, and online schooling is a large contributor to the stress both parents and their children experience at home. On the other hand, a content analysis study in Malaysia suggests that learning from home during the COVID-19 pandemic has increased the role of parents in cultivating knowledge at home (Surtahman, et al., 2021). The increased involvement in mobilizing learning activities for children at home also creates the opportunity for more collaboration between the parents and the school, hence improving their children’s academic achievement.

Mental Health Going through a pandemic as we have never experienced in our lifetime that leaves millions of people isolated with no sign of ending soon can leave a huge impact on one’s mental health. For those with mental health issues, pre-existing medical conditions, living in poverty, or experiencing racism as members of ethnic or racial minority groups, the risk is more elevated (Liu & Doan, 2020; Prime et al., 2020). Even before the pandemic, parental mental health was generally associated with their children’s psychological wellbeing (Sprang & Silman, 2013). Negative effects from natural disasters, for example, can lead to prolonged periods of increased psychiatric symptomology such as anxiety and depression (Fussell & Lowe, 2014). The pandemic has undoubtedly impacted many families’ finances and access to resources and connections. During COVID-19, especially the lockdowns, many usual sources of support were no longer accessible. For example, preliminary results from the first 5000 participants in the Co-SPACE (COVID-19 Supporting Parents, Adolescents, and Children in Epidemics) study out of the University of Oxford indicate that 80% of families receiving social services reported that these supports stopped or were postponed during COVID (Waite et al., 2020), leaving vulnerable families under-supported. Another common example includes neighbors/friends or relatives that parents depend on to help with children (e.g., providing childcare, before or after school care, parenting support) or providing instrumental or social support for the family in general. During COVID-19 families likely lost access to many of these resources because of the fear of infection and social distancing expectations or mandates. Similarly, during the pandemic related school closures

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and transitions to online learning, children lost direct access to their schools, peers, teachers, and other resources, including access to free/reduced breakfast and lunch which disproportionately impacts children living in poverty. The stresses of parenting during the pandemic may have amplified parental burden and mental health symptoms. These additional stressors may affect their role as a parent and how they are parenting. Previous research has found significant correlations between parents’ caregiver burden, mental health, and perceptions of their children’s stress (e.g., Chung et al., 2020; Russel et al., 2020). This, in turn, significantly affects parent-child closeness. One must also consider the possible spillover effects for depressed parents, as well as compensatory effects for anxious parents (Chung et al., 2020; Russel et al., 2020). A study by Bate et al. (2021) on 158 parents in the span of March 2020 to May 2020 found that 75% of parents reported at least a mild depression, 80% reported mild to moderate anxiety, while more than half reported trauma symptoms. The lockdown significantly increased parental stress levels and, in turn, had a negative impact on their parenting. A study of 258 parents in Singapore suggests that parental stress affects their relationship with their children and increases the use of harsh parenting (Chung et al., 2020). The increased risk of parental mental illness can result in domestic violence and child maltreatment, especially if the parents are not getting any help (Fegert et al., 2020). Parenting behaviors among those with Post-Traumatic Symptoms Disorder (PTSD) tend to be more hostile and are less responsive (Christie et al., 2019). The risk is higher, especially for families with children with special needs, existing mental health problems, and low socioeconomic status. Parental depression has been found to increase parent-child relationship conflict (Russell et al., 2020). Children’s outcomes of parents with PTSD are also alarming (Plant et al., 2017). Maintaining positive mental health during quarantine was difficult for many, including adolescents. Those with preexisting psychopathologies (such as anxiety and depression) and neurodevelopmental conditions (such as ADHD and autism spectrum disorder), are more vulnerable to uncertainties and abrupt changes (Becker et al., 2017). Being isolated at home and having little to no face-to-face interactions can cause an individual to feel extremely lonely. Prior to COVID-19, about 11–20% of young people ages 12–15 reported that they felt lonely “sometimes” (Cooper et al., 2021). In a study conducted involving 2330 Chinese school children, Xie et al. (2020) found that 17.2% of children experienced anxiety while 22.6% reported depressive symptoms. A similar study in Japan involving 1200 children suggests that 24.1% had moderate mental distress, while 29.3% reported severe mental distress while learning in quarantine (Horiuchi et al., 2020). The impact of COVID-19 has increased the overall negative mental health effects on adolescents. Pandemic stress has led to additional issues such as anxiety and depression, sleep disorders, school-related stress, and overall change in individual functioning (Hussong et al., 2022). There may be relationships in the lives of adolescents which cause additional stress. Marital relationships, sibling relationships, and parent-child relationships can further the amount of stress within the family dynamic. During the quarantine, child stress has been linked to parent-child

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relationship conflict as well as a lack of closeness to their parental figures (Russell et al., 2020). A study found that Indonesian parents with psychosocial functioning problems reported to have fewer positive family interactions which was associated with greater child maladjustment such as fewer child competencies and greater behavioral issues (Riany & Morawska, 2021). Increased conflict and loneliness in the household, especially during a time of isolation, can become additional stressors to children, furthering the decrease in positive mental health. On the bright side, relationship qualities (i.e., maternal sensitivity, perceived maternal warmth) are found to moderate the effects of maternal depression on their children and promote children’s resilience (Brennan et al., 2003).

Conclusion The COVID-19 pandemic affected parent-child relationships in a multitude of ways. One key impact was the direct loss of parents, caregivers, and other family members who died from the effects of the virus (Asgari et al., 2022; Gray et al., 2022; Hillis et al., 2021) and the related stress associated with family member’s experiences with the illness. Other important negative impacts came from the various responses meant to prevent or slow the spread of the virus. One crucial impact was the loss of or decreased access to necessary resources such as social support for parents from friends, family, and agencies; peer and school support for school aged children; and the loss of employment for many families. Especially during the lockdown periods, additional stressors (e.g., balancing working from home and monitoring child’s online schoolwork) spilled over and created an additional caregiver burden. Minoritized families seemed to have experienced a more negative impact from the pandemic, especially those in low-income groups and racial/ethnic minorities (e.g., Fortuna et al., 2020; Tai et al., 2020). Thus, parental support is a critical component of positive adolescent adjustment during COVID-19 (Dimitry, 2012; Donker et al., 2021; McMahon et al., 2020). Additionally, most parents also needed additional support during the pandemic, especially to help cope with the additional stressors and to compensate for the loss of access to typical support for families. Since parents serve as key protective factors for adolescents, providing more support/resources to parents will also have a positive impact on adolescents and parent-adolescent relationships.

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Ally Laila Murphy is an Assistant Professor in the Department of Education and Society and affiliated with the Department of Family Science and Social Work at Miami University of Ohio. Dr. Murphy earned her Ph.D. and M.Sc. in Human Development and Family Studies from Iowa State University. She also has a Bachelor’s degree in Child and Family Psychology. Her research focuses on developmental psychology (particularly cognitive development), trauma informed care and education, families at-risk (e.g., single-parent families, incarceration and families, etc.), resiliency, family structure and function, and sexuality. Kevin Ray Bush is a Professor in the departments of Educational Psychology and Family Science and Social Work, and Co-Director of the Doris Bergen Center for Human Development, Learning and Technology at Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. His research focuses on child and adolescent development in contexts (e.g., family, school, community, culture); and program evaluation. He has conducted studies with diverse US (Appalachian, African American, Asian American and Latinos) and international (e.g., Chinese, Chilean, Mexican, South Korean, and Russian) samples of children, adolescents and parents. Dr. Bush earned his PhD in Human Ecology from The Ohio State University in 2000.

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Jayne Elise Jurasek is an undergraduate student at Miami University, majoring in Psychology with minors in Criminology and Comparative Religion. She is also in the newly established Combined MASW Program for Psychology undergraduate students working toward receiving their Master’s in Social Work. Other research projects she has participated in include the evaluation of a school-based child and family prevention program focused on students in K-12 living in families at or below the poverty line; and a community needs assessments of local Head Start and Early Head Start Programs.

Parenting, Mental Health and Transgender Youth: Practices and Perspectives in India Doyel Ghosh and Prasanta Kumar Roy

Who Is a Transgender Person? The term “transgender” is often used as an umbrella term to represent individuals who disregard rigid, binary gender constructions prevalent in society, and whose self-expression and presentation violates culturally prevalent stereotypical binary gender roles. Transgender people may live full- or part-time in the gender role ‘opposite’ to their biological sex (Chakrapani, 2010). Hijra, a name popular in South Asia, particularly in India, is characterized as a person whose birth or biological sex is male but gender expression is as female or as neither male nor female. Eunuch, Kinnar, Kothi, Chakka, Aravani, Zenana, Khawaja sara are other names given to them, which vary culturally and geographically. The term hijra and transgender do not mean the same thing. Even though many hijras may be transgenders, the term hijra refers to the socio-ethnic group to which they belong, which has its own special rules about life and also earning a living.

Transgender Mythology, History and Prevalence Transgender or cross-gender identities and behavior among humans existed since ancient times in most cultures. There were many communities around the world, where gender incongruent and same sex behaviors existed. Ancient texts of many countries have documented presence of transgender identities. The original version of this chapter was revised: One of the author name was cited incorrectly in both the citation and in the reference list which has been corrected now. A correction to this chapter can be found at https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_30 D. Ghosh · P. K. Roy (*) Department of Clinical Psychology, Institute of Psychiatry-COE, Kolkata, India © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022, corrected publication 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_25

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According to the American Psychiatric Association (2013), the prevalence for male-to-female (MTF) gender dysphoric individuals was between .005–.014% and for female-to-male (FTM) between .002–.003%. Similar findings are obtained from Belgium, The Netherlands and Ireland (Bakker et al., 1993; De Cuypere et al., 2007; Judge et al., 2014). In Asian countries, the prevalence rate was varied. The census in India (Registrar General of India, 2011) states that the total population of transgenders was estimated to be around 4.88 lakhs (0.04%). The reason for variation in Asian countries may be due to differences in social acceptance. In Iran (AhmadzadAsl et al., 2010) and Japan (Baba et al., 2011), acceptance for transgenders is very low, so they conceal their identities. In Thailand acceptance is high (Winter, 2006), so more people are openly coming out. In India, the prevalence is comparatively high even though their acceptance overtime has declined. The reason for this could be that since ancient times a third gender has been recognized and accepted in Indian culture as referenced in ancient literature, folklore and mythology and as seen in cultural practices (Michelraj, 2015). According to Sharma (2012) and Michelraj (2015), in ancient Indian texts like the Ramayana and Mahabharata, and in Vedic and Puranic literature (1500 BC) there was mention of ‘third gender’ who had been referred to as ‘tritiyaprakriti’, or ‘napumsaka’. They were an integral part of ancient Indian mythology, and our literature and folklore are filled with many stories where gods and goddesses are represented androgynously like Ardhnarishwara, and where gods are transformed into the opposite sex for the betterment of society. There are instances where Lord Krishna transforms himself into female Mohini to fulfil Aravan’s (Son of Arjuna) last wish and he could be sacrificed to Goddess Kali for the purpose of Pandava’s victory in Kurukshetra war. In Ramayana, when Lord Rama was leaving for exile, he had ordered men and women to stop following him and go back. He realized his mistake of not mentioning the third gender after 14 years, when he came to the same spot near Saryu River while returning to his kingdom. He saw a small group of people that had been waiting for him in tattered condition for the last 14 years. These people were hijras. When lord Rama asked them why they hadn’t left, they answered that Lord Rama did not give them any instructions while leaving for exile; he had only mentioned males and females. So they decided to wait for him at the place where he had left them. He was impressed by their loyalty and sad for their condition and his ignorance. He then gave them a boon to confer blessing. From this, the ritual of eunuchs’ blessing to a newly wedded couple or new born child was considered as auspicious. Moreover, our mythology is also suggestive of some Indian rulers who had obtained cross-gender identities to fulfil some goals; as, in Mahabharata, Arjuna lived as a eunuch in the kingdom of Virata. There is also mention of Shikandi who was a transwoman. In the Puranas, they mention three types of Devas (god) of dance and music: Apsaras (female), Gandharvas (male) and Kinnars (neuter). Jain texts have also mentioned the concept of psychological gender with the biological sex. In ancient times, the rights of gender incongruent individuals were not violated; they could live together, dress as they liked, have any occupation and blend easily with the society. They were not outcast but treated with respect. In the Mughal period also, transgenders rose to renowned positions like advisors, administrators, guards to harems and generals. They were considered witty, loyal and

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trustworthy. They could freely travel and mingle with all sections of the population and played an important role in empire building. Even though transgender identities existed all over the world, many times they had to face harassment and exclusion. Some Indian researchers (John, 2017; Michelraj, 2015 & Tripathy, 2013) observed that it was under British rule that transgenders were outcast and started facing discrimination. After colonial rule their condition did not improve, but voices against the discrimination had started rising.

Psychosocial Issues in Transgender Persons Research on social exclusion of transgenders in India revealed that they are criticized, looked down upon, discriminated and abused in their homes, by their family members, relatives and neighbours (Chakrapani, 2010; Lahiri & Kar, 2007). Their parents try to control them with strict authoritarian approaches by taking punitive measures to stop the gender variant behavior or try to change them (Mohta et al., 2017). In school, they face rejection, abuse and harassment from their teachers, peers and other school authorities, so that many of them drop out early. Those who continue their education are not given jobs according to their capability. They also face rejection, abuse and harassment in the workplace and many times get into professions like sex work which further puts them into risk for substance abuse and sexually transmitted diseases. They also face discrimination in the health care, legal and political areas due to stigma and lack of awareness about the problems they face. They also get into professions like hijragiri (collecting alms from marketplaces or by conferring blessings to newborns) and launda dancing (earning through dancing in marriage ceremonies) which puts them into more risk for abuse, harassment and stigma (Lahiri & Kar, 2007). They feel isolated, purposeless and powerless due to the adversities they face. There is also the experience of significant inner conflicts as they start believing that societal values are no longer helpful for them and their goals could be better achieved through means that are socially unapproved and condemned (Mohta & Mukherjee, 2013). This results in hostile behaviors to others. Similar findings are also reported in our neighbouring countries like Bangladesh (Khan et al., 2009), Nepal (Regmi & van Teijlingen, 2015) and Pakistan (Abdullah et al., 2012) and in many other parts of the world like the USA (White Hughto et al., 2015); Canada (Logie et al., 2011), Argentina (Socías et al., 2014), England (Ash & Mackereth, 2013) and Mexico (Infante et al., 2009). These findings suggest that transgenders around the world often face similar problems. Studies around the world report that psychiatric morbidity is high among the transgender population (Chakrapani, 2010). Significantly higher rates of current, as well as lifetime, prevalence of major psychiatric disorders have been observed. These include depression (Chen et al., 2019; Kim, et al., 2006), anxiety disorders (Mazaheri Meybodi et al., 2014), Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD, Hebbar & Singh, 2017), substance abuse (Rowe et al., 2015), somatoform disorder (Wanta

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et al., 2019), personality disorders (Mazaheri Meybodi et al., 2014) and suicide attempts (Chen et al., 2019). In India, Hebbar & Singh (2017) reported a significant presence of anxiety disorders, trauma related emotional disturbances and high risk for suicide in this population. In an unpublished work by one of the authors of the current chapter (Mohta et al., 2013) both male to female and female to male transgender groups had significant presence of depression, dysthymia, anxiety, PTSD, drug addiction, delusional disorder and certain personality disorders. Parental acceptance and connectedness (Ryan et al., 2009), along with perceived family support, (Basar & Öz, 2016) are known protective factors for many of the psychiatric problems in this population. Thus, understanding of parenting style in the cultural context of India and moreover of transgender population would help us to plan particular therapeutic goals so that the wellbeing of this marginalized population can be restored.

Concept of Parenting in Southeast Asia Parenting is a blend of placing age-appropriate demands on the child and emotional responsiveness (Baumrind, 1967). Parenting is one of the most important determining factors of mental health of children and adolescents (Ryan et al., 2017). The emotional presence and empathy of parents are found to be significant protective factors of psychological wellbeing and development of individuals (Meng et al., 2020; Mutie, 2015). Baumrind (1991a, b) devised a conceptual framework of three parenting styles, authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive. According to this model, authoritative parents are identified as high on warmth and also display firm control over the behavior of their children. Here the parents place clear limits while catering to the individual needs of the child by use of adaptive control techniques (e.g., democratic decision making, reasoning) and engaging in age-appropriate autonomy granting. Authoritarian parents are high on control and restrictiveness and low on autonomy granting and warmth. These parents tend to use controlling behavior like shouting, hitting, criticising, and imposing their expectations on children. Permissive parents are high on warmth but low on control and tend to be overindulgent (Robinson et al., 1995). In Baumrind’s classification, authoritative parenting is documented as being the optimal parenting style with regard to the outcome of the child. Authoritative parenting has been consistently associated with positive self-perceptions while authoritarian parenting has been found to be strongly related to negative selfperceptions (Bun et al., 1988; Tafarodi et al., 2010). Scoring high on authoritarianism may have different meanings and implications for Asians (Lau & Cheung, 1987). For North Americans or Europeans, the concept “strictness” may be identified as negative characteristics, such as parental dominance, hostility or aggression, but for Asians, it may be considered a form of control with some positive characteristics such as parental concern, involvement and caring (Chao, 1994).

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Parenting in south-east Asia involves limited personal space for children, intrusive or overprotective parenting with strict parental control, parental differences in socialization of boys and girls, excellence for academic achievement of children, and strict enforcement of family rules. There is an expectation of obedience of children. Notions of shame and familial honour during childrearing regulate behaviour of children by sacrificing individual choices (Isaac et al., 2014; Shek & Sun, 2014; Tuli, 2012; Xu et al., 2014). In India and Bangladesh both parents are involved in childrearing with more responsibility of the mother. In a joint family structure other family members are also involved, particularly the grandparents, though the joint family system is breaking down slowly (Hamadani & Tofail, 2014; Tuli, 2012) There may be rural and urban differences in terms of how family values, expectations and achievements are imposed upon a child (Hamadani & Tofail, 2014). Parenting incorporates strong emotional bonding with the child. Indian mothers spend lots of time in close physical contact and take a major role as disciplinarian and nurturer. Direct (physical) punishment or deprivation is the commonest technique to discipline a child (Jambunathan & Counselman, 2002; Seema & Begum, 2008). Though the value-based parenting approach uses authoritarian style that might interfere with one’s autonomy or self-identity, there is also emphasis on comprehensive development of the child integrating cognitive, emotional and spiritual growth. With the changing face of the family, particularly in the urban society, from traditional joint to nuclear, parental roles are also slowly changing and there is greater involvement of fathers in childrearing (Hamadani & Tofail, 2014).

Parenting Style and Psychological Well-being of Transgender Persons In the middle to end of the twentieth century, various aetiological theories regarding development of Gender Identity Disorder (GID) were formulated. Many psychologists stated that GID or transsexuality develops in the pre-oedipal phase (i.e. early childhood) and dysfunctional family constellation might be associated with GID in boys and girls. Emotionally unavailable mothers, extreme maternal closeness, a severely disturbed, emotionally distant or physically absent non-supportive father and insecure attachment might be contributory to the genesis of the condition (Haber, 1991; Stoller, 1966; Stoller, 1968; Zucker & Bradley, 1995). Such parental characteristics would not provide the child with sufficient scope to identify with the same sex parent and/or strengthen their same-gender behaviour. However, no strong empirical support was found in subsequent studies (Green, 1987; Zucker et al., 1994). The GID population perceived their fathers as hostile and rejecting, less dominant, less caring, less available, and emotionally distant, whereas mothers were more

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controlling, less caring and emotional (Rekers et al., 1983; Simon et al., 2011; Simon et al., 2013). Several research studies have indicated that Lesbian Gay Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) young adults with a history of high rejection by their families are more likely to use illegal drugs, attempt suicide, and report high levels of depression (Ryan, 2009). They have poorer health, lower self-esteem, feelings of hopelessness and alienation, and are less likely to protect themselves from HIV or sexually transmitted diseases (Ryan & Rees, 2012). Parental support predicted higher life satisfaction, lower perceived burden of being transgender, and protection against depression (Simon et al., 2013). One of the authors of this chapter systematically examined perceived parenting style among the Indian transgender population (Mohta et al., 2017). The results indicated that the transgender group scored significantly higher than the non-transgender counterpart on the authoritarian parenting subscale for both the parents, implying that perception of the parents as more directive and valuing unquestioning obedience. They also perceived parental detachment, lack of parental warmth, and use of punitive measures of control by their parents. In addition, the transgender group scored significantly lower on authoritative subscale for both the parents, suggesting that their relationship with their parents characterised less warmth, reason and flexibility. In an unpublished work Bhaduri & Roy (2017) observed that parenting perception among gender queers (who do not follow binary gender norms) is more authoritative, whereas it is more authoritarian for both transwomen and transmen. Interestingly, permissive parenting perception was on the lower side and authoritarian congruent perception was highest across all three gender groups.

Parenting, Transgender Identity and ‘Coming Out’ Around the time of adolescence, the identity of a boy or girl is mostly fluid and evolves through developmental phases (Galinsky, 1987). For a gender nonconformity child or adolescent who navigates through this transition and is looking for the meaning of their being, the role of parents can facilitate or worsen their process of disclosure of sexual orientation or “coming out” (Rothman et al., 2012). Rosario et al. (2009) reported that approximately 79% of sexual minority youth came out to at least one parent. In another study it was found that 46% of adult men and 44% of women with emerging sexual orientation issues had disclosed it to their parents (Savin-Williams & Ream, 2003). They observed that subjects were more likely to speak to their mothers and disclosures typically happened around age 19 years. “Coming out” may be depicted as a two-stage process (Guittar, 2013). • Coming out to self • Coming out to others

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The acknowledgement of one’s identity as a gender minority may create an emotional threat to oneself. In our clinical practice, we see how in our culture people struggle to fit in to the set societal norms, to feel “normal” before they finally “come out” to themselves. Achievement of identity or resolution of an identity crisis is related to authoritative parenting style where there is the correct blend of warmth and responsiveness from the parents (Fadjukoff et al., 2016). After self acceptance of gender identity there may exist an incubation period. Our interview with S.G, a transman, revealed an incubation period of 18 long years before he could disclose his identity to a psychiatrist for the first time; for others an average of 3 years was noted. After coming out to self, most people reported that they had a sense of living in a box, withdrawn from society, and the fear of judgement and apprehension of rejection were intense. Coming out to others greatly depended on the acceptance of self, ability to disclose it to others, and validation from the environment, especially parents and family. At the initial phase of transitioning, they come out to the trans-community only and at the social phase they start living as transgenders and dress like that. In a study from India, Shaji (2021) observed that the family support system is poor during the social phase of coming out and this might have negative impact on their overall quality of life in comparison to the initial phase. Parental acceptance is a major protective factor for a gender minority individual (Ryan et al., 2010); around one third of gender minority individuals received parental acceptance and another one third receives rejection and the other one third never disclosed their decision to the parents (Rosario & Schrimshaw, 2013). There are mixed results of acceptance or rejections of parents after coming out across culture and time (Katz-Wise et al., 2016). There might be initial rejection in some cases followed by gradual acceptance. In our interactions with various transgender groups, it was revealed that a good number of cases had to wait for up to 3 years for parents to accept their gender identity and for some the acceptance does not come ever in their lifetime. In India, Fernandez & Gomathy (2003) conducted an extensive study and reported that disclosure of sexual identity is linked to incidence of violence in almost all cases with continuation of violence in 50% of gender nonconformity people. Emotional abuse was a most common form of violence along with physical, sexual and verbal abuse. Moreover, parents take a large number of sexual minority people to mental health professionals forcefully to change their sexual orientation. In our interview, MD who is a transwoman, shared how he was confined into one room after disclosing his identity to his parents and the family believed that punishment and threat could cure his gender dysphoria. MD later developed severe suicidal intents and was brought to us after frequent attempts at ending his life. Indian parents try different options to make their children behave in a normative way, and finally acceptance comes after a prolonged period of coercion, frustration and unsuccessful attempts to behave in a heteronormative way, sometimes after a broken heteronormative marriage. A small percent of parents show their awareness of the so-called gender atypical behaviors of the child and take a facilitative role in the coming out process (Das, 2018). Interestingly, our experience reveals that the alternative gender identity is better accepted by the parents where there existed prior

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mental health issues in either the youth or in parents. In one clinical instance, TD had behavioural issues and suicidal intents since her teen age years. When at the age of 18 she came out to her parents, her parents did not reject her identity. Their only concern was her behavior and wellbeing. In another instance, MG had led a very introverted and private lifestyle. His father who was going through psychiatric treatment for his depression, was guilty and ashamed of his parenting as he felt that he could not contribute to his son’s life. The coming out of MG came as a relief to his father as he could attribute meaning to MG’s detachment and aloofness. As mental illness is already stigmatized in Indian society, the family with a history of mental illnesses has already dealt with perceived social stigma. In such families when the child with gender nonconformity is ‘coming out’, parents’ perception of anticipated social rejection is usually less as they have already worked through it. Families with more emphasis on traditional value systems, like having a family and children, giving importance to religion etc., and having rigid belief systems or attitudes, might show more problems with accepting the ‘coming out’ of their children (Newman & Muzzonigro, 1993). With time the family system in India, particularly in urban society, with education, migration, inter-caste/religion marriages and increased scientific awareness, rigid traditional values are being changed to liberal and flexible value systems, This might have positive implications for acceptance of coming out. Moreover, multicultural studies on coming out find similar reaction patterns of parents irrespective of the cultural variations of the family members (Merighi & Grimes, 2000).

Transgender Children and Psyche of Indian Parents We attempted to find out what creates resistance within Indian parents towards acceptance of alternative gender identity of their offspring. The factors and our discussion with parents having transgender offspring centered on the following constructs: • Collectivist society: The first thing parents are concerned about is “society”. They ask “what will people say about us?” and “what if society boycotts us?” Sometimes, their apprehension is based on prior social experiences of boycotting and social isolation. They had received suggestions from neighbors and family members to put their child into some “hijra community” and that creates immense shame. In Indian society shame is a significant emotion that regulates their decision making and social identity. • Parents may go through an initial period of unacceptance towards the visible changes that take place with the “coming out” process. The appearance of the child changes when they choose one particular gender and exhibit gender diverse behavior. Parents shared that it was difficult for them to accept that the child they raised as a boy/girl did not remain the same. It seems to them that their lived reality is denied or invalidated. That creates immense anxiety and they become reactive, sometimes aggressive enough to forget their reality.

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• Idealistic expectations: Indian parents hold some idealistic expectations from their children regarding how they should live a life. That expectation is necessarily built upon the heteronormative truth as the only possible truth. In India wedding rituals are elaborate affairs, celebrated with extended family and friends. For many it is a social approval or symbol of a healthy family system. Mother of TD (19-year-old F to M) shared how she was heartbroken to know the gender identity of TD. She had all kinds of dreams related to TD’s marriage and how she would conduct the week-long ceremony with all her relatives. The most concern regarded the procreation of the family, especially where there is a single child. They report a sense of despair within them before they come to terms with it. Some parents may go through a prolonged period of depression. However, so far there is real scarcity of research-based data on the mental health of parents of transgender youths. • It would not be irrelevant here to mention that the choice of gender identity by the offspring is a sign of an independent thought process. This sense of independence may appear as a threat to parental narcissism. The narcissism (Freud, 1957) may prevent the parent from seeing a child as a separate individual with a unique identity. It may feel like helplessness to exercise perceived controllability over their children whom they believe as their extended self. Hence, the choice of gender may evoke narcissistic injury to the parent which may make them hostile (Green & Charles, 2019) towards the gender choice of the offspring. • Family systems theory is derived from the fields of biology and cybernetics going back to the 1940s and 1950s. Von Bertalanffy (1950), an Austrian biologist, attempted to integrate systems thinking and biology into a universal theory of living systems. According to this theory, a family seeks for homogeneity as they believe it creates equilibrium in the system. Presence of a transgender offspring would, thus, create disequilibrium in the intactness of family identity. • Most parents with transgender offspring we interacted with expressed their concern regarding the health of their child, the fear of being labeled in society and fear of being judged as a failed parent.

Transgender Child’s Perspective of Parents While our discussion of parental resistance and non-acceptance could mostly be deconstructed to fear, anxiety and concerns, it may not look the same from the children’s lenses. The transgender offspring reported the followings when they were requested to analyze the resistance from their parents’ perspective• Lack of understanding the child: The disapproval of the gender identification has an adverse effect. They report “I am not understood by my parents” and eventually they conclude “I am not loved”. The anguish then gets generalized and manifests itself in despair, emptiness and sometimes sibling rivalry.

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• Putting society before the child’s need: The transgender offspring typically report “my parents have always put society before my need”. The 18-year-old M to F adolescent said in the session that although the parents do not share a cordial relationship with the extended family, they always think about them, and “their opinion matters more than my wellbeing”. • Stereotypical understanding of gender: When asked about the non-acceptance of parents of their gender identity, most of them also think that Indian parents’ understanding of gender is stereotypical, necessarily binary and overlapped with biological sex. Even if they come to know about the gender dysphoria of their children, they think that it is completely reversible with the help of coercion, indigenous therapy, astrology, medicine and psychological counseling. The transgender offspring also acknowledge that most of the parents lack basic knowledge of their situation. They are not aware of the existence or activities of the LGBTQ community. They do not know about gender affirmative therapy, where and how to do it and its risks and benefits. Some of them reported that although their parents had some idea about the LGBTQ community, they either did not have further interest to explore it or had consciously distanced themselves from this because of homophobia or transphobia.

Better Parenting Practice for Transgenders in Indian Cultural Context In previous sections we reviewed the parenting styles of parents having transgender offspring and it was evident how non-acceptance adversely affects the mental health of transgender people. We also tried to delve deeper into the non-acceptance from both the child’s and parent’s perspectives. The discussion revealed the difference in perspectives and gap in communication. Where there was parental fear, anxiety and concern, children felt rejected and insignificant. In this section we will introduce SPACE – an acronym to bridge the gap between the parent and their transgender offspring. • Sensitize: The first is to sensitize and educate oneself regarding gender. All parents need to know about the basic facts regarding gender role development as it is as important as social, emotional and cognitive development. Gender sensitivity also paves the way to openness of experience. Parents sometimes overlook the gender atypical features of their children as they do not fit in to their pre-conception of gender. Hence, they remain in denial and the coming out process comes as a shock and acceptance gets delayed. Gender sensitivity may also foster a gender-neutral way of bringing up a child. It may also help parents to notice gender atypical behaviors in early developmental ages, and eventually help the child to deal with gender dysphoria. It is also a helpful idea for the parents to socialize the concept of gender fluidity with their extended family and friends so

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that they incorporate that into their existing schema of gender and acceptance towards gender non-conforming individuals. Gender sensitization might help the parents to adopt a positive parenting approach towards the rearing of transgender offspring. Positive parenting: Positive parenting is a healthy way of parenting where parents discipline children in positive ways without using physical punishment, critical comments and comparison. In positive parenting, parents are sensitive and responsive towards the developmental demands of the child. In positive parenting practice, when a child manifests gender non-conforming behaviour, the parents would typically not exercise any coercive treatment. Instead, they would like to know more about the child’s understanding of it and if there are any physical, social and emotional consequences of the behaviour. Acceptance: Acceptance is the key of living a mentally healthy life. It is true for both the parents and children. If the parents can accept their child, both can live a healthy family life and share a strong bond. Non-acceptance is very common in cases of gender non-conforming children. Acceptance and validation won’t change the gender orientation of the child; however it would increase the self– esteem, emotional stability and reduce psychopathology. It would help them to establish themselves in the outer world with confidence and conviction. Child centric approach: A child-centric approach aims to safeguard the child’s needs and promote the welfare of the child. It assumes the child as the future citizen and ensures a healthy upbringing. The parent may feel trapped between the conventional thought pattern of society and the unconventionality that a child brings in. However the child centric approach advocates and prioritizes the child’s way of being and attempts to minimize the societal interference for a better mental health. Empower the child: The goal of parenting is to raise children to be fully functioning individuals who can take responsibility and positively contribute to society. Parenting is not only about disciplining the child but also developing selfreliance and resilience. The contributing factor to developing resilience is a non-critical way of parenting. The parents should raise their children in a way where they feel empowered and can protect themselves against societal discrimination and hostility.

The best result will come only after accepting the present scenario where there exists a lack of understanding and knowledge regarding LGBTQ. It may be helpful to accept and normalize the parents’ initial reaction to the coming out process instead of taking it as an invalidating experience. Parents may need to provide an incubation period to absorb the initial shock. Hopefulness towards future acceptance and creating a way to negotiate with parents’ anxieties and concerns in a rational way can facilitate the process further.

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Conclusion The present chapter focused on the prevailing parenting approaches to transgender children and adolescents and to provide an understanding of parenting practices from both children’s and parents’ perspective in India. We tried to provide guidelines for better parenting practice with the intention of reducing severe mental health issues in transgender persons. There is significant dearth of scientific studies particularly in India. More explorative work is needed to fill up the gap in our knowledge. Acknowledgement We are thankful to the transgender subjects and their parents who allowed us to interview them so that we can understand the subject matter in detail. Disclaimer While giving case examples we have used the pronouns considering the biological sex only.

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Doyel Ghosh completed her M.Sc. in Psychology from University of Calcutta, India and did her professional training M.Phil in Clinical Psychology and Ph.D. from the same University. Currently she is working as a Clinical Psychologist at the Institute of Psychiatry, Kolkata and has been dealing with child and adolescent problems. She is interested in stress and anxiety disorders. Her research experience include psychological profiles of Transgenders, attitudes of the Hijra community towards mental health and the help seeking attitude of the Hijra population. She had been involved with the development of a manual of positive parenting for Indian children. Her other research areas are neuropsychology, dissociative disorders and disaster mental health. Prasanta Kumar Roy completed his M.A. in Psychology from M.S. University of Baroda, India and became a licensed Clinical Psychologist after his M.Phil in Medical and Social Psychology from the Central Institute of Psychiatry, Ranchi. India. He received his Ph.D. from the University of Calcutta. He has been teaching and practicing for almost 20 years and is currently functioning as Head of the Department of Clinical Psychology, Institute of Psychiatry, Kolkata. He is engaged in many research activities and one of the major areas of interest is the gender minority populations of India.

Parenting Children with Disabilities in East Asian Countries and the U.S. Misa Kayama and Wendy Haight

When parents notice that this child is not typical, even if it’s a little thing, that makes parents anxious. (Japanese mother) We [parents] all became old friends together over time. It’s like raising our children [with disabilities] together. (South Korean mother) Kayama et al., 2020, pp. 211 and 216

Introduction In cultures around the world, parents of children with disabilities experience unique challenges and joys. They must navigate challenges such as providing long-term physical care, securing necessary medical and educational services, managing difficult behaviors, and navigating stigmatization (Blum, 2015; Connors & Stalker, 2003; Francis, 2015; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). They also may experience grief and psychological distress, deep concern for their children’s futures, and conundrums related to the impact of disability on their other children and family members (Cantwell et al., 2015; Farrugia, 2009; Francis, 2015; Lalvani, 2015; Sato et al., 2015; Solomon, 2012). Further, the financial burden of medical care and other disability services is a serious issue for many parents (Blum, 2015; Francis, 2015; Ghosh & Parish, 2013). Parents of children with disabilities also experience many joys. Seeing their children develop and strive to overcome challenges can lead to a deep sense of pride and respect for their children’s strength and perseverance. In addition, raising children with disabilities is an opportunity for parents’ personal growth, for instance, in their own understandings of human differences and the value of individual lives M. Kayama (*) Department of Social Work, University of Mississippi, University, MS, USA e-mail: [email protected] W. Haight School of Social Work, University of Minnesota, Twin Cities, St Paul, MN, USA e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_26

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(Berube, 2016; Chang & Hsu, 2007; Francis, 2015). For them, networking with other parents of children with disabilities can be a source of wisdom and community (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Francis, 2015; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009; You & McGraw, 2011). Of course, parents’ experiences vary by the type and severity of their children’s disabilities. Children with sensory (vision and hearing) and more severe physical and cognitive disabilities may be identified at birth, or in early childhood. Some children may need intensive medical care for their survival. Others may need continuous medical and educational support. These children’s medical and educational needs can cause parents personal as well as financial stress (Connors & Stalker, 2003; Francis, 2015). Some children with disabilities that affect their social and psychological functioning (e.g., autism spectrum disorders) also may be identified in early childhood. Despite the negative stereotypes associated with these disabilities, some parents, who may have blamed themselves for “bad” parenting, express feelings of relief when their children receive medical diagnoses (Blum, 2015; Huang et al., 2010; Kayama & Haight, 2014, 2018). Medical diagnoses can lessen parental guilt and allow access to formal services (Blum, 2015; Francis, 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2018). In contrast, some children with disabilities that do not involve delays in intellectual development (e.g., specific learning disabilities, attention deficit hyperactivity disorders [ADHD], and high-functioning autism spectrum disorders) or physical challenges may not receive formal support until school age. Parents of these children may struggle with accepting the new label of disability that can stigmatize their children who are otherwise typically developing (Kayama & Haight, 2014, 2018; Lalvani, 2015). Parents’ experiences of raising children with disabilities also may vary across cultures. Broadly speaking, Western cultures, such as the U.S., place greater value on children’s individual rights and independence (Shweder et al., 2006). U.S. children with disabilities ages 3–21 years old, for example, have been entitled to formal special education services since the passage of P.L. 94-142 in 1975, currently the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (U.S. Department of Education, 2021). Part C of this law, added in the 1986 reauthorization, made early intervention programs available for younger children with disabilities (birth to 36 months; U.S. Department of Education, 2020). This federal law was implemented during the Civil Rights Movement in response to the public’s heightened sensitivity to the rights of children with disabilities to receive an appropriate public education (Wright, 1999). Currently, about 14% of U.S. children receive special education services (National Center for Educational Statistics [NCES], 2021). Yet some U.S. parents are reluctant for their children to receive special education and other services, and report experiences of social exclusion (Francis, 2015; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). Others resist medical diagnoses (KoroLjungberg & Bussing, 2009). Some parents also object to educators’ use of disability labels they perceive to be stigmatizing (Lalvani, 2015), and communications focused

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on paperwork, diagnosis and service plans they experience as insensitive (BlueBanning et al., 2004; Blum, 2015). Following the leadership of Western countries, many non-Western countries have implemented laws that ensure the rights of children with disabilities (United Nations, 2006). These laws, however, may conflict with cultural beliefs and practices pertaining to support for children with disabilities. Educators in Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan, for instance, report significant challenges in implementing rights-based inclusive education policies due, in part, to stigmatization associated with such services. Many parents decline specialized services for their children due to concerns about stigmatization (Haight et al., 2016; Kayama et al., 2020). Thus, Western values of individual rights and specialized services must be weighed against the risk of stigmatization associated with such services (Varenne & McDermott, 1998), particularly, in non-Western countries. This chapter focuses on the experiences of parents raising children with disabilities in several East Asian countries (Japan, South Korea, and Taiwan), and contrasts these experiences with those of parents in Western cultures, primarily the U.S.

Stigmatization: An Obstacle to Parenting Children with Disabilities Stigmatization associated with disabilities and specialized services can dampen the joys of raising children, as well as exacerbate the challenges faced by parents across cultural contexts. Stigma can be defined as an “undesired differentness” that discredits individuals in the larger society (Goffman, 1963). Stigmatization may be enacted through labeling, stereotyping, status loss, discrimination, social exclusion and negative emotional responses (Link et al., 2004; Yang et al., 2007). Parents in a variety of cultural contexts express concern regarding the impact of stigmatization on their children’s sense of self, social lives, achievement, and opportunities (e.g., Kayama & Haight, 2018; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). Stigmatization also can be directed at those who have close relationships with stigmatized individuals (i.e., “courtesy stigma”; Goffman, 1963), including parents and siblings. Across diverse cultural groups, parents of children with disabilities report social isolation, blame for “bad parenting,” and feelings of shame. These parents also describe others’ negative comments about their children and demeaning, hostile or rude behaviors. Such behaviors may be displayed by strangers, extended family members, parents of typically-developing children, and even educators or other professionals (Blum, 2015; Farrugia, 2009; Francis, 2015; Grinker & Cho, 2013; Jegatheesan, 2009; Sato et al., 2015). Yet cultures vary in parents’ responses to stigmatization. As a group, parents in Japan, South Korea and Taiwan display relatively greater sensitivity to stigmatization associated with their children’s school struggles and potential disabilities than do U.S. parents. These parents frequently decline formal support or services to avoid

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stigmatization, and some have even filed formal complaints against educators who initiated conversations with them about their children’s school struggles (Kayama et al., 2020). In the U.S., many parents, including those who initially resist the label of disability due to associated stigmatization, eventually acknowledge the benefit of special education services (Blum, 2015; Francis, 2015).

Responses to Stigmatization Within Families Understandings of children’s disabilities also may vary within families and across generations. Parents serving as primary caregivers, typically mothers, tend to have greater awareness of their children’s social, emotional, and academic struggles and acceptance of their medical diagnoses than family members who have less direct interactions with their children. Some mothers in the U.S. and Japan, for instance, express frustration toward their children’s fathers who do not take their concerns about their children’s developmental issues seriously (Blum, 2015; Francis, 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2014, 2018). In addition, some mothers from Japan, South Korea, and the U.S. say that grandparents, especially their parents-in-law, do not understand their children’s disabilities, blame them, critique their parenting, and label them as “bad parents” (Blum, 2015; Francis, 2015; Kayama et al., 2020; You & McGraw, 2011). Such frustration and pressure may add to marital tensions, and further undermine the primary caregivers' ability to secure timely services to address their children’s struggles (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Francis, 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2014; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). There also appear to be cultural variations in the meanings of some family members’ denial of children’s struggles. Relative to U.S. parents, Japanese and South Korean mothers emphasize fathers’ and grandparents’ concerns centered on stigmatization associated with disability. A Korean mother, for instance, described that her child’s grandparents were concerned that a medical diagnosis per se would “disable” the child (Kayama et al., 2020).

Responses to Stigmatization in the Community Parents’ experiences of stigmatization also extend to their everyday social interactions in the community, but to varying degrees across cultures. In the U.S., parents report some negative impacts of stigmatization on their children and families (Francis, 2015; Lalvani, 2015). Yet some middle-class white parents, especially those whose children’s disabilities are clear to observers, such as physical disabilities, view the challenges their children experience as due to their diagnosed disabilities, and not their children’s or their own failures. In other words, children’s medical diagnoses appear to provide some protection from the label of “bad parent.” The primary concerns of these parents tend to revolve around the loss of social status

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within a middle-class community where going to college and securing a “good job” are signs of a good life for their children (Francis, 2015). Such sensitivity of parents to social expectations may reflect U.S. cultural values of independence and selfsufficiency. This burden can fall heavily on U.S. parents given the cultural expectation that they, as opposed to the extended family or community, are responsible for child rearing (Tabatabai, 2020). For these parents, children’s medical diagnoses and subsequent access to services can reduce the burden of taking care of their children. Parents’ experiences may be considerably different in East Asian, Confucian cultures, where child rearing is considered a responsibility of the extended family and community, as well as parents (Kayama et al., 2020; Kim, 1991). In such cultural contexts, other community members may quickly notice differences in a child with a disability. Parents, however, may be reluctant to disclose their children’s disabilities to maintain social status within the community. Parents in Japan, for instance, describe exerting enormous effort to build and maintain relationships with other parents so that their children with disabilities are accepted, for example, by educating them regarding their children’s disabilities. They, however, may feel that disclosing their children’s disabilities will place extra burdens on other parents, choose not to openly discuss their feelings and challenges, and subsequently experience social isolation (Sato et al., 2015). Some also become reluctant to engage socially with other parents when they notice that those parents do not fully understand the challenges of raising children with disabilities (Kayama & Haight, 2014).

Parental Responses to Children’s Disabilities in Cultural Context Understanding parents’ child rearing practices, including around disability issues, requires a closer look at the cultural contexts in which they are embedded. Broadly speaking, in East Asian countries (e.g., Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, and China), Confucianism and Buddhism largely affect parents’ understanding of disability and their experiences of rearing children with disabilities. In such contexts, East Asian individuals, generally, are socialized to be sensitive to any issue that may cause them and their families to lose face or social status, cause discomfort to others, or disrupt the harmony of social groups. Until recently, individuals with disabilities often were regarded as burdens to family members, and even hidden to avoid stigmatization (Jegatheesan, 2009; Tachibana & Watanabe, 2004).

Confucianism Confucianism originated in China in the sixth century B.C. and was spread across Korea by the mid sixth century, and then was introduced to Japan (Tucker, 2018/ 2013). A central concept of Confucianism is maintaining harmony within social

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groups, such as families, communities, and the larger society (Fu, 2012). The Confucian virtue of filial piety (children’s return of parental love and sacrifice), for instance, strengthens the value of the family and family ties (Paik, 2001; Tucker, 2018/2013), which encourages family members to support children with disabilities and their parents. Such strong ties have extended to mutual help across the community and larger society and contributed to the development of informal social support networks. Yet people with disabilities and their families can be marginalized as disruptive of the harmony within the community, especially if they are not able to perform their expected roles, or their conditions cause others discomfort (Nakamura, 2006; Paik, 2001). Narratives of East Asian parents illustrate some of the challenges they experience in understanding their children’s disabilities. Japanese mothers of children with disabilities, for instance, describe other family members who reject their concerns about their children’s struggles due to the risk of the whole family losing face within the community. They feel that forcing family members to acknowledge their children’s disabilities would damage relationships within the family. Thus, some mothers choose not to express their thoughts and feelings to family members, in some cases for years, and support their children alone until other family members understand the need for professional support (Kayama & Haight, 2014, 2018). Confucianism also emphasizes the importance of education. Children’s success, particularly academic achievement, is considered a symbol of good mothering (Grinker & Cho, 2013; Kim-Renaud et al., 2005). For example, South Korean parents whose children have relatively milder autism spectrum disorders (e.g., no delay in intellectual development), and who have been successful in supporting their children academically or in other areas such as sports, are considered role models (Grinker & Cho, 2013; You & McGraw, 2011). Their narratives of “success” encourage other parents to exert extraordinary effort to support their children with similar challenges to conform to such mainstream standards. However, some parents criticize these “successful” mothers as inadvertently reinforcing misunderstandings of disability leading to the greater marginalization of children for whom such standards are unattainable (You & McGraw, 2011).

Buddhism Buddhism originated in India and was introduced to China (Tang, 1991), and then spread across other East Asian countries by the sixth century (Nakamura, 2006; Tucker, 2013). In Buddhism, karma is a central concept that shapes the understanding of parents as responsible for their children’s disabilities. Karma refers to the consequences in this life of actions by individuals in their previous lives. Disability may be viewed as a punishment of the person with the disability or that person’s parent for sins in their previous lives. They, however, can be rewarded in their next lives if they accumulate good deeds in the current ones (Chang & McConkey, 2008;

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Nakamura, 2006), for example, following a basic tenet of Buddhism by considering everyone, including those with disabilities, as equal and with compassion (e.g., Kondo, 2010). In East Asian parents’ narratives, their family members’ understandings of the cause of children’s disabilities reflect the concept of karma (Haight et al., 2016). A South Korean mother of a school-aged child with autism spectrum disorder, for instance, explained: I think the most stigmatization comes from our family. Especially my mother-in-law was a big problem. She always said, “What you and I did wrong in our previous lives has caused your child’s disability.” All the faults turn to be on women. My mother-in-law never allows me and my child [with autism] to attend our relatives’ wedding and any other family events because she thinks that [the presence of my child with a disability] will bring bad luck and ruin their good [fortunes]. Recently, I would say, I notice that my mother-in-law now understands me [and my hard work of raising a daughter with a disability]. . . . but she still seems to think that my child with a disability is a kind of burden and challenge (Kayama et al., 2020, p. 225).

Some Japanese parents also describe that some medical professionals consider them as responsible for delays in their children’s social and communication skills. For example, a mother of a child with autism spectrum disorder related: I was told that I had a problem [by a professional when my child was in preschool]. To me, he was a very difficult child to raise. He couldn’t communicate well, so he didn’t understand how I felt. When I talked to him, he didn’t respond. So, I really wanted to know more professional strategies, or some ways to [handle such situations], but the professional said [it was my fault]. It’s like [we were left], only parents and child, and felt very lonely. I didn’t know at all why my child was like that, and didn’t know what I should do (Kayama & Haight, 2018. p. 47).

Animism and Other Spiritual Beliefs Spiritual beliefs and rituals, as well as religious beliefs and teachings, also contribute to shaping parents’ understandings of disability and their child rearing practices. Spiritual understandings of disability, such as possession by a demon, is culturally widespread (Olkin, 1999; see also Fadiman, 1998; Kayama et al., 2020; Nakamura, 2006). In East Asia, for instance, disability may be explained as kegare [spiritual pollution caused by violation of a taboo] in Japanese Shinto (Nakamura, 2006), fate in Taiwanese Taoism (Chuang, 2011), and possession by an “evil spirit” in Korean Shamanism (Oak, 2010). These folk beliefs and mythical narratives also highlight strengths of individuals with disabilities. For example, a Japanese Shinto god born with a disability is worshipped as bringing wealth (see Nakamura, 2006). In many non-Western cultures, rituals and traditional medical practices, such as Chinese medicine (You & McGraw, 2011), co-exist with Western medicine to treat disabilities and chronic illnesses. For example, Taiwanese parents of children with disabilities may take their children to Western medical doctors, while also going to see fortune tellers, including at Buddhist or Taoist temples, for psychological comfort

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(Shyu et al., 2010). Similarly, many Japanese parents go to Buddhist temples and Shinto shrines to receive omamori (amulet/charm) to wish for the recovery or healthy development of their children diagnosed with chronic illnesses or disabilities (see Kawano, 2005).

Western Beliefs and Rights-Based Practices in Asian Cultures Understandings of disability in non-Western countries also are influenced by rapid Westernization, including the concept of human rights (see Kayama et al., 2020). After World War II, the leadership by international organizations, such as the United Nations, promoted human rights across the world. The Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, for example, has been signed and ratified by 164 and 185 countries (United Nations, 2022). This movement not only encouraged governments to implement policies that ensure the provision of medical and health care services for children with disabilities and their access to public education (United Nations, 2006), but also raised the awareness of parents about their children’s rights to receive appropriate services. Indeed, across cultures, including in Asian countries, parents of children with disabilities formed support groups to help one another, exchange information about rearing children with disabilities, and advocate for their children (Hongo, 2006; Jackson et al., 2018; Sato et al., 2015). Yet rights-based practices are still new in many non-Western cultures. East Asian parents of children with disabilities, for example, describe the challenges of balancing the benefit of formal support for their children with any risks of stigmatization associated with such support (Kayama et al., 2020; Maret, 2008). Crosscultural variations in how parents balance the risks with benefits may be more apparent for children whose struggles are on the border of having disabilities and developing typically. These relatively milder cognitive and behavioral disabilities include specific learning disabilities (e.g., dyslexia), ADHD, high-functioning autism spectrum disorders, and some emotional, behavioral, and language disorders. In the U.S., these disabilities typically are considered high-incidence disabilities, and 10% of children, in the general population, receive special education services for these disabilities (NCES, 2019). In contrast, only 2%, 0.2%, and 1% of children in Japan (Ministry of Education, Japan, 2020), South Korea (Ministry of Education, South Korea, 2013), and Taiwan (Chiang & Chang, 2009), respectively, receive special education services because of these relatively mild cognitive and behavioral disabilities. East Asian parents’ sensitivity to stigmatization (Haight et al., 2016; Kayama et al., 2020), and interpersonal norms, influenced by Confucianism, may contribute to the lower percentage of children with disabilities receiving special education services. Japanese parents, for instance, describe their reluctance to discuss their children’s struggles at home and school with educators and other professionals. They express concern that their perspectives may challenge educators and professionals, who in Confucianism have authority due to their professional knowledge and

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experiences, and thus taint the support their children receive from them (Kasahara & Turnbull, 2005; Kayama & Haight, 2014, 2018; see also Kim, 1991). In contrast, U.S. parents, particularly middle-class white parents, tend to express their thoughts more openly to educators and medical professionals including differences in perspectives, and may openly seek second and third opinions. These parents consider receiving appropriate accommodation and services as their children’s rights (Francis, 2015; Lalvani, 2015). Some U.S. parents, especially those who have professional knowledge, also consider that they are responsible for “educating” educators regarding how they should support their children, and providing accurate, and up-to-date information about their children’s medical diagnoses (Francis, 2015; KoroLjungberg & Bussing, 2009). Widespread access to the Internet and other media, as well as changes in education systems following the international disability rights movement, also have affected how parents understand and respond to their children’s disabilities. Despite cultural differences in how parents communicate with professionals, not understanding the reasons for their children’s struggles can be devastating and may result in parents’ anxiety and self-blame. Some U.S. and Japanese parents exert enormous effort in searching for information on the Internet, and in books and the media (Francis, 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2018; Sato et al., 2015), to understand their children’s behaviors and struggles. Japanese elementary school educators also report changes in parents’ attitudes, particularly toward disabilities that are typically identified during school age, such as specific learning disabilities, ADHD, and highfunctioning autism spectrum disorders. Parents, who in the past were reluctant to acknowledge their children’s struggles as “disabilities” and declined available support, have become more aware of these disabilities. Some have begun to approach educators to seek support even before educators initiate conversations with them (Kayama et al., 2020; Kayama & Haight, 2018).

Parenting Siblings of Children with Disabilities Many parents of children with disabilities also are raising typically-developing children. In addition to adding to a family’s joys, the presence of these children can reduce parental guilt, and counter blame placed on parents as inadequate or bad parents. Parenting children who are both typically developing and who have disabilities also can present additional challenges. Parents, for instance, may feel guilty about expending a disproportionate amount of energy and time on children with disabilities, especially in activities where typically-developing siblings are left out. Indeed, studies in the U.S. and the U.K suggest that parents’ intensive support for children with disabilities can result in conflicts with typically-developing siblings who also want their attention (Connors & Stalker, 2003; Fellner et al., 2017; Francis, 2015; Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). The presence of higher-achieving siblings also can underscore the academic and behavioral challenges of children with disabilities. Some U.S. parents of children with ADHD, for instance, describe

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comparing these children to their high-achieving, typically-developing siblings. Instead of focusing on the strengths of children with disabilities, these parents’ attention may shift to their lower academic performance, behaviors, and interpersonal troubles at school (Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). Similar to parents from Western cultures, some Taiwanese parents of children with disabilities express feelings of guilt toward their other children. These children’s needs, for example, participation in community activities, may be overshadowed by their siblings’ immediate challenges (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Shyu et al., 2010). In addition, Taiwanese parents express concern about the negative impact of siblings with disabilities on typically-developing children. One parent, for instance, said, “She has a wonderful future lying ahead of her. If her brother [with autism] turns out poorly, we cannot burden her with her brother” (Shyu et al., 2010, p. 1328). South Korean mothers also elaborated on how typicallydeveloping children respond to, and interact with their siblings with disabilities. One mother, for example, described her typically-developing younger son who has an older brother with a disability: [I am worried] that [the presence of] a sibling with a disability may stigmatize him. I notice that my younger son is more mature than other children. He manages to internalize a lot [about his older brother with autism]. [When there is trouble with his brother], he relieves stress later on his own. I don’t think that’s a good way [to relieve his stress]. I am worried that he may become overwhelmed at some point in time. I also notice a kind of sibling rivalry. Although he is younger, he always needs to take care of his [older] brother. I notice that he is jealous of his [older] brother who always receives more attention from me and [his] father (Kayama et al., 2020, p. 226).

Children’s responses to their siblings with disabilities, across cultures, are both positive and negative. Similar to parents’ concerns, children and youth who have siblings with various disabilities in the U.S., the U.K, and Japan (Connors & Stalker, 2003; Fellner et al., 2017; Yamamoto, 2005) express frustration towards parents whose attention is focused on their siblings. They also may be responsible for extra household chores and caregiving of their siblings with disabilities. Yet these children and youth also express understanding of their siblings’ disabilities and respect for their efforts to overcome challenges. Typically-developing siblings’ understandings of disability can be important not only for supporting children with disabilities, but also for reducing stigmatization associated with disability among their peer groups. The ways they interact with their siblings can serve as positive examples for other children.

Lessons Parents Learn from Children with Disabilities Raising children with disabilities also provides new and unanticipated opportunities for many parents. Some parents, for example, report that their children with disabilities help them to become more empathetic towards others, and reframe their understanding of disability, parenting, and the meaning of life. U.S. parents

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disclosed that parenting is not just guiding their children to meet social expectations. It is, rather, guiding their children to be happy (Francis, 2015). U.S. parents of children with developmental disabilities, such as Down Syndrome and cerebral palsy, elaborated what “happy” means for their children as adults: living independently from parents, performing everyday activities within the community, and having social lives and relationships. Japanese (Sato et al., 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2014) and South Korean (You & McGraw, 2011) parents of children with disabilities also described adjustment of their perceptions of what it means to live a good life, including for their children. Their perceptions, for example, focused on engagement with enjoyable social activities rather than academic achievement. Some parents also describe changes in their perspectives on their children’s capacities. As one U.S. mother of a 3-year-old child with developmental delays described, “I’m happy with the way she is” (Tabatabai, 2020 p. 124). Similarly, Japanese, South Korean, and Taiwanese parents described changes in their perspectives from a focus on children’s disabilities to greater attention to children’s strengths and what they have learned from them (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Kayama & Haight, 2018; You & McGraw, 2011). Taiwanese parents of children with autism spectrum disorders (Chang & Hsu, 2007) and intellectual disabilities (Chang & McConkey, 2008), for example, discussed their own personal growth towards greater understanding and forgiveness of others, and increased appreciation of the life they have gained through their child rearing experiences. Some Japanese and Taiwanese parents also reported that the cooperation within their families in caring for their children with disabilities strengthened their relationships, cohesion and a sense of pride, important characteristics of families influenced by Confucianism (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Sato et al., 2015). Parents’ increased understandings of disability also may be supported by other parents of children with disabilities. Many parents indicate that meeting with other parents whose children have similar challenges is a significant source of emotional and social support. U.S. parents of children with disabilities, for example, describe networking and meeting with other parents of children with disabilities as opportunities to gain a sense of belonging, support one another, and grieve the loss of a healthy, “normal” child (Francis, 2015). Other U.S. parents describe that engagement with experienced parents through social groups for parents of children with ADHD helps them to gain knowledge and acceptance of their children’s medical diagnoses as well as receive practical guidance (Koro-Ljungberg & Bussing, 2009). Likewise, Japanese, South Korean, and Taiwanese parents describe support they receive from other parents of children with disabilities. A feeling that “I am not alone,” and the presence of someone who understands their experiences helped these parents relieve stress and make sense of their children’s disabilities (Chang & McConkey, 2008; Kayama & Haight, 2018; You & McGraw, 2011).

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Conclusion The literature discussed in this chapter has a number of implications for research and practice. First, similar to parents everywhere, parents of children with disabilities can experience deep joy in child rearing. They also gain a sense of fulfillment and respect for their children’s strengths and tremendous effort (Berube, 2016; Francis, 2015; Sato et al., 2015). Yet current scholarly work focuses more on challenges family members experience. While understanding the challenges is fundamental to formulating intervention programs, a steadfast focus on challenges can pathologize children and their families. Future research should also focus on the strengths and resilience of children with disabilities and their families. Parents who have been successful in navigating challenges can provide insights into how we can better support those who may be struggling. In addition, professionals can support the engagement of parents of children with disabilities as advocates and peer mentors. Experienced parents can act as advocates for children with disabilities and their families. Support groups for parents of children with disabilities (Hongo, 2006; Jackson et al., 2018), and informal networks parents develop with other parents (e.g., Chang & McConkey, 2008; Marshak et al., 2019; Kayama & Haight, 2018; Sato et al., 2015), for instance, can serve as important resources to support parents’ social and psychological functioning, as well as to provide information for raising children with disabilities. Likewise, for typically-developing siblings of children with disabilities, the presence of caring adults and other children who have siblings with disabilities can support their social and psychological wellbeing. Parents’ experiences of raising children with disabilities also are shaped in sociocultural contexts, reflecting culturally-based beliefs about disability and practices to address children’s disabilities. In East Asian countries, cultural understandings of disability co-exist with Western practices and beliefs, such as biologically-based medical diagnoses and services that ensure children’s rights. In addition, Asian families’ experiences are closely tied to community members and extended families, probably more than in Western cultures where individuality is of relatively greater value. For professionals working with parents whose children have disabilities, understanding such sociocultural contexts that have shaped their child rearing experiences is necessary, as well as general, evidence-based understandings of disabilities which typically emphasize Western beliefs and practices. Despite cultural differences, however, U.S. and East Asian parents describe their wishes for their children with disabilities to be “happy” and enjoy their lives, just like children who are typically developing. Yet the road to happiness and joy may be somewhat different from that of typically-developing children (Francis, 2015; Kayama & Haight, 2014; You & McGraw, 2011). This chapter concludes with a statement of a Japanese mother who learned from her son, Yusuke, about what it means to be a parent. Yusuke has a learning disability and speech problems. He stopped going to school in fourth grade due to his academic and interpersonal challenges. With extensive support from educators and

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other professionals for both Yusuke and his mother, Yusuke found a place he felt comfortable in a special education classroom. After a year of struggle, Yusuke’s mother stated: I used to feel ashamed of [him] or tried to hide, but I don’t have that kind of feelings any more. . . He is just a good child, normal, and making an effort, even harder than me. I’m proud of him. . . I really appreciate this school and Yusuke. I learned a lot from them. . . . Yusuke already has begun to go forward, so I also have to do so (Kayama & Haight, 2014, p. 103).

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Misa Kayama is an Assistant Professor of Social Work at the University of Mississippi. She received her PhD in Social Work from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, and worked as a Postdoctoral Associate at the University of Minnesota–Twin Cities. Her research focuses on the cultural shaping of the experiences and understandings of disability and other social justice issues, such as racism, through cross-cultural ethnography and mixed methods. Findings of her research have been published in 25 peer-reviewed journal articles. Her cross-cultural ethnography on children with disabilities at public schools also was published as two books with Oxford University Press. Wendy Haight is a Professor and Gamble-Skogmo Chair of Child Welfare and Youth Policy, University of Minnesota–Twin Cities School of Social Work. She completed her B.A.at Reed College, and her PhD at the University of Chicago. She studies human development and culture through a wide interdisciplinary lens focusing on vulnerable families. She engages with local and global communities primarily using ethnographic methods to better understand complex social issues. She then puts this understanding into action with teams of community partners to design, implement and evaluate tailored interventions using mixed methods. The understanding we gain from these applied endeavours increases our understanding of the phenomena under study leading to new research questions and better polices, social work and education interventions.

Parenting and Adolescent Technological Addictions Cristina Serna and Isabel Martínez

Technology in Today’s Society The ICT (Information and Communication Technologies) society has revolutionized the way we relate to each other and manage information. On the one hand, this reality has brought many advantages, such as improving quality of life, simplifying daily life and solving problems, increasing labour productivity, scientific research and economic expansion, facilitating globalization, combating isolation and loneliness, promoting independence and autonomy, stimulating mental and cognitive activity, offering positive and effective educational formulas, and providing access to information and knowledge (Shaw & Black, 2009; Yoo et al., 2014). But, on the other hand, it has also brought disadvantages, such as the extinction of traditional jobs, the creation of a generation gap in the world of work, the exclusion of people who do not have access to ICTs, the abuse of natural resources and the labour exploitation for manufacture of materials, the reduction of real social interaction replacing authentic experience with virtual experience, the overvaluation of immediate reinforcement, the promotion of sedentary leisure, the deterioration of memory and mental processing, and the emergence of new psychosocial pathologies, like cyberbullying or addiction to technological devices (Fumero et al., 2018). Internet use around the world has grown exponentially in just two decades. According to Internet World Stats (2022), the number of people using the Internet in the world has grown from 361 million users in 2000 to 5168 million in 2021, and 65.6% of the world’s population uses the Internet. To this must be added the effect of the COVID-19 pandemic and the preventive measures taken. Phases of home confinement, reduced social contact, and conducting educational and work activities online have led to the expansion of daily Internet use (Dong et al., 2020). Among the

C. Serna (*) · I. Martínez University of Castilla-La Mancha, Ciudad Real, Spain e-mail: [email protected]; [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_27

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problems resulting from these social changes, compulsive use of the Internet and electronic devices is a major concern worldwide, as it has been found that between 1% and 4% of the population shows some impairment in important areas of life (Wu, 2017). This problem becomes more worrisome when considering that it especially affects the younger generations (Anderson et al., 2017). According to some authors, such as Drakeford and Hudson (2015), availability is a determining factor of addictive behaviors and, given that the Internet has become a readily available and affordable resource worldwide, it is to be expected that the number of Internet addicts will continue to grow. Moreover, the expansion of smartphones increases this likelihood by making Internet use an unstructured and time-unlimited activity (Elhai et al., 2017).

Adolescence in the Digital Era Adolescence is a transition period that involves evolutive changes derived from the physical and psychosocial changes associated with chronological age. However, the most important transformation affecting development at this stage can be encompassed within the generational or historical changes linked to the values of postmodernity and the revolution of the digital era. Therefore, it is necessary to incorporate the historical context into an explanatory model about today’s adolescents (Serra et al., 2019). Another common feature of adolescence is the power of peer social context in socialization, so that peer interaction becomes decisive for adolescents’ development and life satisfaction (Greenman et al., 2009). Thus, the peer group takes on a basic role in the development of the adolescent’s identity, prioritizing it over the family (Brown & Larson, 2009; Erikson, 1968). From the interactions between peers where social comparison process is involved, valuable information emerges for the construction of the adolescent’s self-concept. The approval and support of the peer group are essential in this process (Harter, 2006; Legault et al., 2006). The virtual space is an ideal scenario for responding to the developmental needs of adolescents, as it allows them to explore the environment and access, share and distribute contents that facilitate their participation in social reality and increase their sense of belonging. At the same time, new technologies are a way of communication, interaction, and social organization, through which to satisfy their need for connection with peers on the construction of their identity (Serra et al., 2019). In fact, a significant part of Internet abuse in young people is due to social networking and interaction needs that occur during the development of adolescent identity (Fioravanti et al., 2012; Tenzin et al., 2019). Nowadays, access to the Internet is affordable, simple and globally widespread, surpassing the fact of having a computer at home, since the use of cell phones and other devices has made it unnecessary to have a computer to be connected to the Net. But information, entertainment and the possibility of communicating are not the only things that the Internet offers. It also carries several risks, and its easy availability means that almost anyone can be

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exposed to them, especially teenagers. In addition to being among the main users of the Net and making extensive and intense use of the Internet, teenagers are the most vulnerable group. Teenagers, who are approaching adulthood and exploring their identity, find on the Internet excellent opportunities to experiment with their emotional, attitudinal, social and sexual areas on the formation of self-knowledge. This process of personal construction, together with the brain immaturity of adolescents to manage self-regulation in the exposure to risks (Oliva, 2007), easily leads them to situations that compromise their safety and a healthy and adaptive development. Among the multiple risks of the Internet, some stand out as more frequent among minors and adolescents. Exposure to inappropriate content, such as pornographic, violent, racist, hate speech, terrorism, drug and alcohol consumption, pathological online gambling, eating disorders, self-harm or suicide (as due to “challenges”), is one of the most frequent risks. Another risk is the commission of cybercrime generally under the ignorance of the illegality of certain behaviors (e.g., illegal downloads) (Livingstone & Haddon, 2008). A significant danger of the Internet is cyberbullying, defined as any behavior through digital media that occurs on a recurring basis and involves hostile or aggressive communication that harasses, threatens or bullies others with the aim of causing them harm. Cyberbullying is a way of transferring bullying or harassment among peers to the world of ICTs, where it can reach greater intensity due to the deindividuation that favours acting under the anonymity of the Net. The effects of cyberbullying on victims can be devastating, having been correlated with high levels of suffering and distress, low self-concept, social anxiety, depression and, in some cases, even suicide (Dooley et al., 2009; Navarro et al., 2013; Smith et al., 2008). Another common risk concerns privacy issues and contact with strangers, both arising from the publication of unprotected personal data available to anyone. The lack of privacy often found in cyberspace can make minors the target of malicious behavior, such as scam, extortion, or identity theft for harmful purposes. In addition, there are often contacts with strangers who hide perverse motivations. Of particular concern is the pedophile practice known as grooming, where an adult persuades a minor to obtain some information or exchange of a sexual nature. Sexting and sexual extortion are also risks associated to sexual content. Sexting consists of exchanging sexual messages, images or videos that, even if consensual, can put physical and mental integrity at risk, if these contents are misused. This is the case with sexual extortion or sextortion, an increasingly common type of cyberbullying whereby the person is blackmailed by threatening to share personal sexual contents (Livingstone & Haddon, 2008; Machimbarrena et al., 2018). Finally, an additional problem that has been highlighted is the abusive or problematic use of the Internet (Bergmark et al., 2011). There are high rates of cyberaddiction among minors, especially adolescents. We speak of dependence when the minor makes excessive use of the Internet, losing track of time and selfcontrol; intense discomfort when unable to connect (abstinence); progressive need to spend more time on the Net to feel satisfied (tolerance) and deterioration in important areas of functioning (personal, social, academic, family) (Young, 1998). Problematic Internet use has also been linked to multiple psychological and behavioral problems

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such as depression, anxiety, problematic substance use, sleep disorders, suicidality, or academic performance problems (Islam et al., 2018; Younes et al., 2016). The risks of Internet are related to the speed with which the digital culture has been implemented, since the changes have meant great adaptive challenges. Research is one of the most important work areas, since knowing the idiosyncrasies of the phenomenon is essential to develop appropriate coping strategies. In this sense, evidence points to some relevant risk and protective factors in vulnerability in the Internet use by adolescents (Fumero et al., 2018; Kuss & López-Fernández, 2016). Risk factors include the following personal and contextual variables: Individual Risk Variables: – Personality traits (emotional instability, impulsivity, hostility, introversion) – Inadequate stress management and emotional regulation – Cognitive and emotional characteristics (irritability, dysphoria, negative thoughts, intolerance to frustration, intense emotion seeking, guilt, dissociative states, low self-esteem, body image rejection, loneliness, low life satisfaction) – Poor social and communication skills – Psychopathological characteristics (anxiety, social anxiety, depression, social phobia, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder and autism spectrum disorder) Contextual Risk Variables • Family risk factors: – – – – – – – –

Conflict Authoritarian rigidity Lack of structure Lack of limits and supervision Poor parental communication about internet use Social learning through inadequate models Negative emotional bonds Low parental support

• School risk factors: – Poor academic performance – Adaptive problems with school or school maladjustment – Peer group risk factors: – Dysfunctional relationships with peers – Lack of offline friends – Social isolationProtective factors include the following personal and contextual variables: Personal Protective Variables – High self-esteem – Good self-control

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Adequate stress management Positive coping resources High life satisfaction High social and communication skills

Contextual Protective Variables • Family protective factors: – – – – –

Communication and dialogue Supervision Establishment of rules and limits Positive emotional bonds Parental support

• School protective factors: – – – – – –

School engagement Support from teaching staff Adequate academic guidance Positive school climate Peer protective factors: Functional, well-adjusted, and healthy relationships with peers

Technological Addictions Technological addictions have been defined as “non-chemical (behavioural) addictions which involve human-machine interaction. They can be passive (e.g., television) or active (e.g., computer games) and usually contain inducing and reinforcing features which may contribute to the promotion of addictive tendencies” (Griffiths, 1995, p.15). Technological addictions can be understood as behavioral addictions related to the excessive and inappropriate use of devices such as the mobile phone, the Internet and services derived from it, such as video games or social networks. These behaviors present core components of addiction, such as salience, mood modification, tolerance, withdrawal, conflict, and relapse (Griffiths et al., 2016). Davis (2001) differentiated two forms of Internet addiction, the generalized form, which involves a wide range of activities over the Internet, and the specific forms, which involve the use of specific online activities, such as gaming, gambling or social networks. According to Young (1998), Internet addiction (IA) involves extreme use of the Internet that causes cognitive, psychological, or physical damage. For example, depression, anxiety, or impatience from Internet deprivation are experienced, and a gradual impairment of functioning in important areas, such as school, family, and social life. There is an ongoing debate about whether problematic Internet use can be considered an addiction (Griffiths et al., 2016). In fact, Internet addiction has been excluded as a diagnostic category in the Fifth Edition of the Diagnostic and

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Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5, American Psychiatric Association, 2013), as well as in the 11th Revision of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11, World Health Organization, 2019). However, there is abundant evidence of its negative consequences on physical health, mental health, and social development (Fumero et al., 2018). Among physical health problems, excessive internet use has been associated with lack of physical exercise, unhealthy diet, obesity, sleep deprivation, musculoskeletal problems, hearing and visual impairments, dizziness, tremors, and multiple pain symptoms, among others (Kamran et al., 2018; Xie et al., 2017). In addition, internet addiction has been linked to numerous psychosocial consequences, such as anxiety, depression, and stress (Younes et al., 2016), impulsivity (Kim et al., 2017), problematic substance use (Raia et al., 2019), low selfesteem (Shi et al., 2017), suicide (Yoo et al., 2014), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) (Weinstein et al., 2015), loneliness (Yao & Zhong, 2014) and academic performance problems (Islam et al., 2018). Research has also shown that Internet gaming addiction has harmful effects that affect physical and psychological well-being (Kim et al., 2017; Wong et al., 2020). This disorder has been included in both the DSM-5 and ICD-11 along with behavioral addictions (poorly controlled repetitive, persistent, dysfunctional behaviors) and involves excessive and uncontrollable use of video games, despite associated problems. This addiction is exacerbated when young people use video games as an avoidant coping strategy to escape moments of stress and anxiety (Plante et al., 2019; Sung et al., 2020). When Internet gaming includes gambling, the DSM-5 classifies it as a gambling disorder. This disorder is included by the DSM-5 in the chapter “Substance-related and addictive disorders” because gambling behaviors activate reward systems and behavioral symptoms similar to those activated by addictive substances. Accessibility to online gambling via mobile devices or computers is related to an increased predisposition to gambling addiction (Drakeford & Hudson, 2015; Gainsbury et al., 2015). Additionally, the anonymity, immediacy of response, speed, and attractiveness of betting, make it more addictive than traditional gambling (Griffiths et al., 2006).

Cultural Differences in Technological Additions Culture as a Context for Development Human beings do not grow up in isolation, but in multiple contexts (Bronfenbrenner & Morris, 2006). Bronfenbrenner’s (1986) multisystemic model contributes the concept of macrosystem, as a cultural context, referring to the importance of a society’s values and their interaction with the other systems (microsystem, mesosystem, exosystem) in the development of individuals. According to crosscultural theories, the different cultural values influence thoughts and behaviors, including parenting practices and technology use. Traditionally, research has focused exclusively on the study of realities specific to the Western world,

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extrapolating the results to other non-Western societies. This has given rise to an ethnocentric perspective that has received criticisms and calls for more cross-cultural studies. These studies remark the need to avoid misperceptions of universality and prevent the biases of monocultural study (Henrich et al., 2010; Arnett, 2008). Individualism-collectivism is one of the six cultural dimensions developed by Geert Hofstede (1980) for his cross-cultural theory. The societies that Hofstede describes as individualistic correspond fundamentally to the Western world (Anglo-Saxon Europe and countries that have received their cultural influence, such as the United States) and are characterized by values oriented towards freedom and independence. Whereas collectivist cultures mostly correspond to non-Western societies (China, Taiwan, Korea, Japan) and are characterized by values oriented to interdependence, obedience, and responsibility towards the group, sacrificing personal freedom and independence. Individualism sets the individual over the concerns of the group, promoting personal fulfilment and autonomy. Collectivism, however, prioritizes group goals and the maintenance of group harmony. People from individualistic cultures tend to perceive themselves as separate from others, while those from collectivistic cultures see themselves as an integral part of their social networks (Markus & Kitayama, 2001). Moreover, the theory of cultural tightness-looseness reflects the degree to which cultures have strict norms and punishments for deviance, asserting that variation in tightness-looseness is related to cultures’ histories of social and ecological threats. Thus, strict norms are a response to these collective threats that help groups remain cohesive and organized for survival. Collectivist societies are “tight” cultures, with rigid group norms, high pressure toward conformity to the norm, and low tolerance for normative deviation. In contrast, individualist societies are “loose” cultures that allow for different norms among groups, with low pressure toward conformity and high tolerance for deviation from the group norm (Gelfand et al., 2011).

Technological Addictions in Non-western Cultures The prevalence of adolescent technological addictions has been documented around the world, although it appears to differ across cultures. For example, the prevalence of Internet addiction is estimated to be between 2% and 18% worldwide (Agbaria & Bdier, 2021). However, there are studies that have found a wide range of distance between Internet addiction in Western (1.98%) and non-Western (35.8%) countries (Shek et al., 2013). Other studies have observed higher rates (Peterka-Bonetta et al., 2019) and more severity in Internet addiction symptoms among Asian samples than among European samples (Balhara et al., 2019), as well as in other technological addictions such as smartphone use (Yang et al., 2019). In the recent meta-analysis by Cheng et al. (2021), the prevalence of social media addiction is higher in collectivist cultures (31%), such as Africa, Asia, and the Middle East, than in individualist ones (14%), such as North America and Western/Northern Europe. In addition, the authors find a significant moderator effect of

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cultural individualism. Several researchers explain these different prevalence rates of technological addictions as a function of the different values and beliefs of these two types of cultures. Mainly, these differences tend to be attributed to the level of pressure to conform to group norms. In collectivist countries, where the pressure to comply with the group norm is stronger, people are more likely to use social media to seek social support and approval and tend to have more intense relationships with other users (Chan & Cheng, 2016). In this way, culturally “tight” collectivist societies can increase their members’ propensity for social media addiction. The different motivations that lead people to use technologies promote different habits. And the use of technologies is not only driven by oneself, but also by the pressure of others (Fabris et al., 2020). Members of individualistic cultures may be driven to use social media by internal demands, while those of collectivist cultures may be guided by both internal and external demands. According to Ko et al. (2006), members of individualist cultures use the Internet for convenience and to meet information needs, while the main motivation of members of collectivist cultures is the search for social interactions. Another construct that is used in cross-cultural research is the distinction between people with interdependent and independent self-construal (Markus & Kitayama, 1991). Individuals with interdependent self-construal tend to take others as a reference in the construction of their identity; they interpret themselves in a collective, allocentric and relational way. These people are more frequent in non-Western cultures. Whereas people with independent self-construal, who are more abundant in Western cultures, construct their identity autonomously, egocentrically, and separately from others. Related to this differentiation, Dogan’s (2019) study shows how people with interdependent self-construal are especially vulnerable to fear of missing out (FOMO), which is an important predictor of social network addiction.

Parenting and Technological Addictions Social context plays an important role in the problematic use of the Internet and technological devices among adolescents. Specifically, two social settings have been related to these problems: peer relationships (Fioravanti et al., 2012; Tenzin et al., 2019) and family factors (Dogan et al., 2015; Weinstein & Lejoyeux, 2010). Several studies have shown that parenting practices and parent-child relationships are related to technological addictions in adolescents. Dogan et al., (2015) found that perceived parental styles predict 25.1% variance in adolescent Internet addiction. Internet addiction is associated with parenting practices, such as neglect, rejection, overprotection, demanding and authoritarian parenting (Dogan et al., 2015; Xiuqin et al., 2010). Other authors have related Internet addition to lack of supervision and involvement in children’s Internet use (Bonnaire & Phan, 2017; Chng et al., 2015). Moreover, other studies highlight the importance of parental warmth and support for the emotional regulation of adolescents, so that those who do not feel satisfied in their emotional needs tend to seek other offset forms, such as quartering to peers and

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online communications, using the Internet as a haven to ease affective distance and/or strict parental supervision. These are more likely to become addicted (Huang et al., 2021; Karaer & Akdemir, 2019). Conversely, adolescents who perceive their parents as more loving, warm, involved, and available are less likely to develop technological addictions (Lin et al., 2009; Yu & Gamble, 2010). Thus, evidence points to parental warmth and support being linked to positive use of new technologies, whereas being demanding and exerting strict control predict problematic use (Chou & Lee, 2017). Classical model of parenting styles is based on two orthogonal dimensions of parental behavior: demandingness and responsiveness (Maccoby & Martin, 1983; Steinberg, 2005). Demandingness refers to the degree to which parents use control and make maturity demands, exercising their authority from assertiveness with their children. Responsiveness refers to the extent to which parents treat their children with affection and warmth, provide them support, accept them, and reason with them (Martínez et al., 2019a; Martínez & García, 2008). Four parenting styles have been identified based on the degree to which parents use practices related to the dimension of demandingness and responsiveness. Authoritative parenting presents high levels of both dimensions, responsiveness and demandingness. Indulgent parenting is characterized by high responsiveness but low demandingness. Authoritarian parenting is defined by high demandingness but low responsiveness. Finally, neglectful parenting presents low levels of both dimensions, responsiveness and demandingness (Lamborn et al., 1991; Martínez et al., 2017; Steinberg et al., 1994). Recent research has shown that authoritarian and authoritative parents use control over the content, duration, and quality of Internet use (Chou & Lee, 2017; Eastin et al., 2006), although differences have been found in the Internet use of children of both types of parents. Authoritarian parents set strict limits for Internet use, but do not use adequate reasoning with their children. Adolescents with authoritarian parents perceive them as highly demanding and less responsive, showing negative and addictive Internet use (Chou & Lee, 2017). In contrast, authoritative parents mediate the Internet content used by their children, instil discipline using reasonable control and non-punitive strategies, and help solve problems in Internet use. Thus, their children report positive Internet use, have high self-control and self-regulation, and spend less time on the Internet than other children (Bornstein & Zlotnik, 2008). In this regard, Dogan et al. (2015) showed that adolescents of authoritarian parents are highly addicted to the Internet, while adolescents from authoritative parents are partially addicted to the Internet. Finally, it seems that neglectful parents are not responsive or warm to their children, but also do not set any supervision or limits on Internet use. This parenting style is also related to Internet addiction (Karaer & Akdemir, 2019; Xiuqin et al., 2010). In summary, it appears that parental practices based on excessive control or lack of control and/or warmth are risk factors for Internet addiction, whereas reasonable control and high warmth, acceptance, and involvement could be protective factors in preventing adolescent Internet addiction (Tao et al., 2007).

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Parenting and Culture Parenting style has been associated with technological addictions in samples from Western countries; however, few studies have investigated if this relationship is the same in non-Western societies. According to Borstein (2013, p.262): “the specificity and generality of parenting, and relations between parents and their children’s mental health, are advantageously assessed through cultural research because neither parenting nor children’s development occurs in a vacuum: both emerge and grow in a medium of culture”. Each culture builds its beliefs around culturally acceptable norms about how to think, feel, and behave in all spheres of life, including parenting. These cultural meanings determine parents’ cognitions and behaviors, leading them to raise their children following the predominant “cultural scripts”. In this way, parents’ beliefs help to organize parenting. Therefore, culture shapes parenting and influences children’s cognitive, emotional, and social development through parental educational practices, affecting different aspects of parenting: the way and availability with which parents care for their children, the degree of freedom to explore that they allow them, the level of control or restrictions they exert over their children, the warmth and support with which they relate to them or the behaviors that parents emphasize (Bornstein, 2013; Bornstein & Lansford, 2010). Cross-cultural comparisons show the importance of normative behaviors in different societies. Research has offered empirical evidence on variations in parenting patterns based on cultural patterns. For example, Steinberg et al. (1991) found that US European American parents tend to use parenting practices that foster autonomy within a supportive and responsive relationship, while Latin American, African-American, and Asian American parents use practices that encourage obedience and conformity. As Chao (1995) points out, US American parents shape their children’s emotional competence by encouraging them to talk about their own feelings and those of others; whereas Chinese parents encourage attunement with the feelings of others, but containment of one’s own feelings, to preserve the group harmony. Several studies focus on how Chinese parents use shame as a tool to control children and gain their compliance. Thus, when children do not meet parental expectations or the social norm, parents induce feelings of shame and guilt in their children, both of which are poorly accepted in Western parenting models (Helwig et al., 2014; Fung & Chen, 2001). Miller et al. (1997) observed that Chinese parents teach norms of behavior to their children through storytelling, focusing especially on cultivating shame for their past transgressions. In contrast, American parents protect their children’s self-esteem by avoiding fostering shame for their bad behavior. Unlike individualistic cultures, which focus on personal needs and autonomy, collectivist cultures prioritize group goals and maintain interpersonal relationships based on social norms, roles and obligations. In China, successes and failures are not personal matters, but those of the whole family, and the satisfaction or shame derived from children’s behaviors put the family’s reputation at stake. Therefore, parents

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tend to be domineering and controlling, making decisions for their children and pressuring them to meet family expectations and not bring shame to the family (Markus & Conner, 2014). Collectivist cultures prioritize in children’ socialization the development of behaviors that protect the cohesion, coexistence and functioning of the group. Hence, these cultures promote the participation of children in group activities, positive relationships between peers and the sense of belonging to the group. On the other hand, individualist cultures promote socialization goals related to independence and self-enhancement, facilitating the acquisition of social skills related to individual assertiveness and self-expression (Bornstein et al., 2001; Chen, 2010). Some studies on non-Western collectivist societies, such as China or South Korea, note a greater tendency for parents to focus on control and discipline than in other Western individualistic societies, and in the relationship between parents and children, affective demonstrations are quite limited, especially in Asian countries (Kim et al., 2016; Pomerantz & Wang, 2009).However, in individualistic cultures, parents tend to create strong emotional bonds with their children through warmth, affection, and emotional closeness (Harkness & Super, 2006). Moreover, not all parenting styles produce the same effects in all cultural contexts. For instance, Baumrind (1989) showed that some parenting styles were more effective in some cultural contexts than others. The authoritative style lead to more positive mental health outcomes for US European American children, and the authoritarian parenting style was more effective for African-American children. This result has been confirmed by other authors, as Chao & Sue (1996) or Dwairy & Achoui (2006), who showed that in some non-western cultural contexts authoritarian parenting could lead to an optimal adolescent adjustment. In this sense, it is key to understanding the meaning that different parental practices have for both parents and children for examining the effects of parenting on adolescents’ outcomes. Several authors have suggested that the meaning of socialization practices can differ depending on the cultural context (Chao, 1994; Pels & De Haan, 2007). Rudy & Grusec (2001) indicated that strictness practices, which involve a hierarchical parent-child relationship, are linked with positive cognitions, and affect in contexts that emphasize hierarchical relations and respect for authority. According to this perspective, parental strictness would be effective in countries or context characterized by vertical collectivism (Triandis, 1995, 2001) where hierarchical relationships are emphasized (García et al., 2019; Martínez & García, 2007, 2008). In countries or contexts where equalitarian relations are emphasized, high levels of reasoning, parental affection, acceptance, and involvement would be enough to obtain optimal adolescent adjustment without the need of high levels of strictness (Martínez et al., 2011; Martínez et al. 2020). This would explain that studies in several European countries (Di Maggio & Zappulla, 2014; Martínez et al., 2019a), and also in some Latin American countries, such as Brazil or Mexico (Valente et al., 2017; Villalobos et al., 2004) agree to relate indulgent parenting with a similar or even greater adjustment in adolescents, highlighting the importance of acceptance and involvement practices in those countries (Martínez et al., 2019b).

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Relationship Parenting: Technological Addictions from a Cultural Perspective The quality of the family relationship is a determinant of technology addiction in different cross-cultural studies. Kim et al. (2016) refer to the negative quality of parent-child relationships as a stressor that increases the risk of problematic Internet use by adolescents. Other studies have found that adolescents from homes where family violence, rigid disciplines, affective deprivation, or abusive parental control are experienced have been associated with Internet addiction (Li et al., 2014; Xiuqin et al., 2010). In terms of parenting styles, both authoritative and indulgent parenting styles have been associated with the most positive outcomes in terms of low prevalence and risk of technological addictions. In contrast, the authoritarian parenting style has been associated with a higher risk of these addictions. However, there is little evidence of cross-cultural variation in these associations, as most studies have been conducted in Western samples (Agbaria & Bdier, 2021). Hsieh et al. (2018) have investigated this relationship in Taiwanese primary school children, finding that overly intrusive and punitive authoritarian parenting is associated with children’s maladjustment, including Internet addiction. Children who perceived authoritarianism and shame were more prone to Internet addiction. Whereas children less prone to Internet addiction were those who perceived a positive parent-child relationship. As in Western society, shame also has a negative impact on the psychosocial adjustment of Asian children, lowering their self-esteem and increasing their propensity for Internet addiction. It appears that the pressure that shame puts on children tends to distance them from their families and awakens in them an increased need to seek haven on the Internet. Internet addiction, in this sense, is a negative coping strategy. Escapes to the virtual world would be avoidance strategies that help children reduce feelings of shame, find a more positive self-image and avoid conflict with parents. The more time they spend on the Internet to avoid the stress of family interactions, the more the likelihood of Internet addiction increases. According to Kim et al. (2016), non-Western cultures tend to be more accepting of parental control as normative than non-Western cultures, so non-Western children are less likely to perceive it as parental rejection or lack of affection. Consequently, strong parental control is probable to produce less stress, and therefore fewer negative developmental outcomes in these children than in Western children. Even so, these authors have found that parental behavior is also a determinant of Internet addiction in non-Western cultures, such as Korean. Thus, stress derived from excessive parental control, especially when it comes from mothers, is associated with an increase in Internet addiction. At the same time, this study confirms that parental support, warmth, and positive relationships with parents act as a protective factor for Internet addiction. Moreover, it seems that this protective effect of good parent-child interactions works even when adolescents are exposed to other stressors, so that positive family relationships may play a mediating role between stressful experiences and Internet addiction in adolescents (Benrazavi & Teimouri,

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2014). Overall, research shows that beyond the different parenting practices promoted by each culture, there are some regularities that are shared cross-culturally, as a cultural universal. For instance, parental psychological control and imposition are associated in multiple cultures with greater psychosocial maladjustment in adolescents. At the same time, despite the different ways in which parental warmth is expressed, the positive role of this variable in the psychosocial adjustment of adolescents has been demonstrated in many Eastern and Western societies (Rothenberg et al., 2020). Research suggests that the same parenting model can be adjusted differently according to the type of culture, producing different consequences in the adjustment of children, and that what may be poorly adaptive in one context may be effective in another. However, there is also evidence of the existence of what are called cultural universals in the relationship between parenting and psychosocial adjustment. In this sense, around technological addictions, in general the support and warmth of parents tend to offer positive and protective outcomes across cultures, whereas rigid control and imposition tend to be a risk factor. Perhaps the differential nuance lies in the fact that when some negative parenting pattern is normative in a context, it has a less devastating effect on the child than when it is less culturally tolerated, as is the case with rigidity and authoritarian control in non-Western cultures. Nevertheless, since authoritarian parenting practices are the most prevalent in non-Western cultures, it is logical that, despite their normativity, they ultimately have a negative effect on the high rates of technological addictions observed in these cultures. Parent-child relationships are an important factor in the explanation of technological addictions and, therefore, also for their prevention and treatment. Moreover, this reality seems to transcend cultural boundaries, beyond differences in normativity and the level of tolerance towards certain behaviors. In general, parenting practices based on support, affection, dialogue, and communication offer the best results in the development, adaptation and psychological wellbeing of children. Whereas parenting practices based on control and imposition, together with lack of affection and warmth, offer the worst results, including those related to the tendency to technological addictions and their negative effects. Finally, it is important to consider risk and protective factors, enhancing the latter to minimize the dangers of adolescents’ involvement in problematic behaviors on the Internet. Actions must incorporate the main actors involved: family, school, and adolescents. Among all of them, the family plays a fundamental role, so it is essential to encourage the development of educational skills among fathers and mothers. In short, the role of the family in this field should focus on developing parental educational styles based on dialogue, reasoning and affection. Guidance and communication on the appropriate use of the Internet, as well as supervision in such use, is also important. Households with positive affective climate and high parental support will be a protective factor against many risks of the digital era. Those households, in turn, will be able to optimize the opportunities this era offers for children’s personal development.

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Cristina Serna is a Professor of Psychology at the University of Castilla-La Mancha (Spain). She combines her teaching work with research in different areas of intersection between Psychology and Social Work, thus applying her double training as a psychologist and social worker. She has her doctorate in Psychology from the University of Castilla-La Mancha (Spain). Her research has been characterized by combining psychosocial and educational variables. Research fellow in the European project ka2 MOMU (Moving towards multiprofessional work) in the framework of the Erasmus+ Strategic Partnership. She is currently a researcher in the group “Social and Developmental Psychology” (PSYE) of the UCLM. Isabel Martínez, PhD, is a professor of Social Psychology at the University of Castilla-La Mancha (Spain). Formerly, she was a research fellow in the Social Psychology Department at the University Federal of Paraiba (Brazil). She is head of the group PSYE [Social and Developmental Psychology] of the University of Castilla-La Mancha. She has conducted research and published studies concerning adolescents’ adjustment, cultural values and family socialization. She has analyzed the relation of parental practices with different variables of adjustment in adolescents in Spain, Brazil, Portugal, and United States.

Becoming a Father in South Africa: Customary Practices and Negotiating Fatherhood Elena Moore

and Jill Samukimba

Becoming a Father in South Africa: Customary Practices and Negotiating Fatherhood This chapter explores how customary practices shape the process of becoming a father among amaXhosa men of South Africa. In the context of low marriage rates in South Africa, we focus on the customs for acquiring patrilineal affiliation outside of marriage. For many black South Africans, a biological unmarried father, as a genitor, will assume outside status until specific rituals or marriage is performed. Under customary law, a biological father does not have automatic rights and responsibilities to his children (Bennett, 2004). Rather, a father’s right to his biological children is linked to marriage and if lobolo (bride wealth) was agreed (with either immediate or partial transfer), the child belongs to the father’s family. If it was not, the child belongs to the mother’s family. Customary law, which is not found in many jurisdictions, is derived from social practices that the community accepts as obligatory. It is defined as ‘the usages and customs traditionally observed among the indigenous African peoples of South Africa’ which ‘forms part of the culture of those peoples’ (Moore & Himonga, 2018). The negotiation of intlawulo [a fine for getting someone pregnant] offers an opportunity to explore the process of becoming a father for many black South Africans and the structuring of unequal social relations between lineage and seniority in the arena of fatherhood. The customary practice of intlawulo,1whilst often conceptualized as a fine or ‘paying damages’ is best understood as a way of bringing families together whereby 1

The term is referred to as intlawulo in isiXhosa and inhlawulo in isiZulu. Throughout the chapter we will use the isiXhosa spelling unless we are referring to cited work where the isiZulu term is used.

E. Moore (*) · J. Samukimba University of Cape Town, Cape Town, South Africa e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_28

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the father acknowledges responsibility of fatherhood to maternal and paternal kin, and maternal kin accept the father as part of the child’s life regardless of his relationship status with the mother. Performing intlawulo serves as an indicator of the father’s commitment and care. In many black Southern African communities, historically the father’s family would pay damages to the girl’s family as part of the intlawulo process (Kaufman et al., 2001; Hunter, 2010). This was often a one-time payment of cows or the cash equivalent. As with any cultural practice, however, the practices of intlawulo are ‘long-standing, complex, and changing’ (Kaufman et al., 2001). Despite the practice being prevalent across Southern Africa (Mvune, 2017) and a key part in the process of becoming a father for many men, the customary practice has surprisingly received little scholarly attention in understanding fathering. The research that does exist indicates that until a child’s father completes inhlawulo, he may not be recognized as the legitimate father of a child, especially by the child’s mother’s family, and he may be restricted from visiting and spending time with his child at the mother’s family homestead (Madhavan et al., 2013; Makusha & Richter, 2016). The aim of this chapter is to examine the concept of intlawulo and its implications for understanding fathering from an African perspective. Based on in-depth interviews with amaXhosa unmarried fathers, the chapter seeks to examine how fathering practices are shaped by customary practices that include relational negotiations with maternal and paternal families along the lines of lineage and seniority. In doing so, the chapter seeks to understand how fatherhood is shaped by lineage since it is the principal way through which the child’s belonging, and the outsider status of the father, is understood. Secondly, we seek to investigate maternal kin and women’s power in negotiating the father’s role in unwed parenting, whilst acknowledging that patriarchal structures in the African continent inserted by colonial powers (Oyěwùmí, 1997; Nzegwu, 2012) positioned men in positions of power. In what follows, we present how employed fathers negotiate the customary practice of intlawulo upon knowledge of a pregnancy. We provide a brief outline of the context of intlawulo and fathering in South Africa before presenting the ways in which men, as fathers, negotiate relations between seniority and lineage in the process of becoming a father. We conclude by considering how the relational dynamics shape fatherhood and allow us to look beyond gender relations and inequalities based on sex.

Intlawulo and Fathering in South Africa Fathers, fathering and fatherhood is no longer a neglected area of sociological inquiry in South Africa and elsewhere. There has been a growing body of work examining the ways in which men are involved in caring and their children’s lives, and what this means for understanding masculinities (LaRossa, 1988; Lupton & Barclay, 1997; Lewis & Lamb, 2007; Dermott, 2014). More recent publications in the US (Coles, 2009; Abdill, 2018), on black low-income fatherhood, have also

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moved away from the ‘deficit-based language’ used to describe black fatherhood, and highlighted caring, involved and responsible fatherhood. In South Africa, fatherhood still bears the imprint of the colonial and apartheid era through the protracted disruption of family life (Murray, 1981;Budlender & Lund, 2011). The ways in which a father’s involvement in domestic life was restricted through laws, the migrant labor system and migrant hostels is now documented (Murray, 1981; Ramphele, 1993; Richter & Morrell, 2006). Over the last decade, research on fathering in South Africa has begun to uncover the ways in which both residential and non-residential fathers are involved in their children’s lives (Makusha & Richter, 2016; Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Morrell et al., 2016). Morrell et al. (2016) highlighted that more than half of fathers aged 18–49 who participated in a cross-sectional survey in 2008, took their parental responsibilities seriously whereby, over 80% helped their children with school homework and 54% of the fathers talked to their children about personal matters. The survey findings resonate with more recent research undertaken by van der Berg et al. (2021, p.29) who surveyed over 1000 biological fathers and social fathers and found that the vast majority were providing financial support, engaged in everyday activities such as eating together, playing, doing homework etc. The findings of the report indicate that when social fathers (as uncles, brothers and grandfathers) are considered alongside biological fathers, a higher level of father-child interaction is taking place. Moreover, when a broader definition of fatherhood is considered, the research shows that in 2019, 78% of children shared a household with an adult man (who may or may not be their biological father), which is an increase from 71% in 2016 (van der Berg, 2021, p. 14). At the same time, studies highlight the different factors which restrict a father’s involvement, such as a lack of resources (Hunter, 2010; Swartz & Bhana, 2009; van der Berg, 2021), ongoing labor migration (Rabe, 2007), decline of marriages, the rise of premarital sex, and the role of extended kin (Madhavan & Roy, 2012; Swartz et al., 2013; Clark et al., 2015). It is understood that involvement in fathering is heavily reliant on relations with the mother and maternal kin as fatherhood happens within families and not individuals (Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Madhavan & Roy, 2012; Clark et al., 2015). Given that a father’s involvement is a negotiated process between fathers, mothers, paternal kin and maternal kin (Madhavan & Roy, 2012), it is important to provide a brief outline of the changing position of mothers in relation to their dependence on fathers and paternal kin. Whilst a more detailed overview of mothers’ changing position in relation to fathers lies outside the scope of this chapter, it has been demonstrated that in the more recent decades, women’s changing position vis-à-vis the labor market (Posel, 2014), state (Moore & Seekings, 2019) and migration (Hall & Mokomane, 2018), has facilitated women’s changing dependence on men (Lee, 2009; Moore, 2013). Particularly in the post-apartheid era, women access more state resources separately from men (Moore & Seekings, 2019) and, unlike practices in the past, outside a recognized union or marriage. The rise of births outside of marriage and the decline of marriage (Mhongo, 2013) have shifted the ways in which fathers are positioned within domestic relations. Moreover, the rise of female headed households to

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represent almost 40% of all households (Hatch & Posel, 2018) has also shifted the position of women in negotiating and decision making for their children (Hatch & Posel, 2018; Moore, 2020) and family members. These changes have re-positioned fathers’ relationships with their children and the mother of their children. There is a paucity of literature in the global North outlining how fathering and fatherhood are negotiated with a particular cultural milieu. In South Africa, a father’s involvement in a child’s life is a negotiated customary process and there is a growing body of literature which focuses on the significance of the payment of intlawulo in mediating a father’s involvement in the life of his child (Hunter, 2010; Mvune, 2009; Makusha & Richter, 2016; Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Hunter, 2006; Mkhwanazi, 2010; Mkhwanazi, 2014; Bhana & Nkani, 2014; Mkhwanazi & Block, 2016; Nkani, 2017). It is important to note that this custom evolves as the people who live by its norms change their patterns of life and move between cultural expectations and state laws. Hunter outlined that by the mid-1950s, with a growing acceptance of premarital sex, inhlawulo was moving from being a payment required for taking a woman’s virginity to a payment incurrent for rendering a woman pregnant (Hunter, 2010). The existing literature on intlawulo (Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Swartz et al., 2013) has focused on how the context of high levels of poverty and unemployment restrict a father’s ability to perform intlawulo and subsequently restrict more involved fathering practices amongst young and teenage fathers (Mvune, 2009; Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Clark et al., 2015; Nkani, 2017). The literature to date has prioritized teenager and women’s voices and the financial component of the process. There is, however, mixed evidence on the extent to which men who do not perform intlawulo are restricted in their access to children. Some research indicates that intlawulo does not automatically grant the father and his family access, as access is based on a willingness to perform ilobolo [bride price] (Makusha & Richter, 2016; Swartz & Bhana, 2009; Nkani, 2017). Others argue that families are beginning to involve paternal kin in childcare, and a child can be incorporated into paternal lineages even in the absence of intlawulo (Mkhwanazi, 2014; Mkhwanazi, 2016). Bhana and Nkani (2014), drawing on research conducted in an urban township in KwaZulu-Natal, suggest that women-headed households tended to be more flexible by allowing the involvement of the young father after the birth even though inhlawulo had not been paid. In line with how we understand customary law as an evolving and living set of norms governing relations and, considering the small samples from which findings are generated, one can expect differences in families’ approaches to the process across region, community, generation and province. Moreover, the absence of data from unmarried nonresident fathers who are separated from their children’s mothers is also likely to leave a gap in what we know about the process. At the heart of the custom lies the question of the child’s belonging to the ancestral family. According to Hunter (2010), as premarital pregnancy became more common, just paying inhlawulo in KwaZulu-Natal typically became enough for a child to take a father’s surname and to belong to the paternal family. There is contrasting evidence as to whether a child can take the father’s surname without ilobolo or intlawulo being paid. Some evidence from studies in KwaZulu-Natal indicate that inhlawulo offers the father an opportunity to formally acknowledge paternity and give the child kinship rights into his paternal family (Madhavan, 2010).

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Communities have ways of integrating children born outside of a recognized union so that the children’s kinship and belonging is not questioned or contested. For example, children are often given the surname of their mother, and paternity is sometimes attributed to the maternal grandfather. The custom of imbeleko [birth ritual] can also be completed to formally welcome someone into his or her family or clan which provides ancestral belonging and protection. Our findings demonstrate that amongst the amaXhosa participants, performing intlawulo does not change the child’s belonging, and the child does not belong to the father’s lineage or clan. The practice of intlawulo was seen as a means of securing moral legitimacy and connection with the paternal family, and of demonstrating respect. An overwhelming focus of the literature to date has focused on the detrimental consequences of the cultural process by focusing on first the financial restrictions that the customary process places on father’s involvement with children and second on the role of the extended family in limiting a father’s access to their children (Makusha & Richter, 2016; Clark et al., 2015). Much of the literature fails to consider how lineage and seniority are key aspects to understanding fathering. The subordination of a genitor or father rests in his position vis-à-vis the lineage in question and the seniority in question and not in the biological sex of this person. The literature tends to conceptualize intlawulo as a process that emasculates fathers under depressive economic family circumstances. There is very little research on the process of intlawulo, specifically from the perspective of involved fathers who have completed the process, and how they understand the process to shape their practices and social relations to the child, maternal kin and paternal kin. A focus on employed fathers’ experience of intlawulo is necessary to expand our understanding of the relational dynamics of fatherhood and to understand how the structures of power are enmeshed in principles of lineage and seniority. By focusing on employed involved fathers, the chapter explores how culture and materiality interlock to shape hierarchies of lineage and gender, thus shaping fathers’ involvement with their children.

Methods A qualitative study was conducted to explore employed fathers’ experience of intlawulo. The research was approved through an institutional ethics review process. The research explored the experiences of employed men’s performance of intlawulo and their involvement in fathering. The second author worked with an experienced older male researcher and respected resident of the research area to identify a sample. A snowballing technique was used to identify fathers, as fathers introduced us to neighbours and friends and other men who fell within the sampling criteria. Each father was approached with information about the research, and we informed all fathers that participation in the study was voluntary. The fathers had to identify as isiXhosa, be between the ages of 18–40 years and have performed the intlawulo process within the last 5 years.

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The researchers encountered many challenges in doing this fieldwork as speaking to strangers about family matters is frowned upon under isiXhosa custom. The fieldwork experience and cultural knowledge of the gatekeeper, together with his familiarity of residents in the area helped ease participants concerns about talking to researchers about their family lives. In this way, the sample of fathers achieved is inclined to represent the experiences of fathers who had a positive experience of the process and continue to be in a good relationship with the mother, child and the maternal family. Eight unmarried fathers, all located in a township on the outskirts of Cape Town, were involved in the study. Some fathers had multiple children and had gone through the process several times. In such instances we focused on their experience of the process in relation to the youngest child but also were attentive to their experience with older children, particularly in circumstances where it was recent (within the last 5 years). The interviews were conducted in the homes of the participants and were conducted in English but some interviewees drew on isiXhosa phrases. The second author, as a black Zambian woman in the field, was aware that her nationality made her an outsider fearing xenophobic attacks while her gender made her vulnerable to gender-based violence. Working closely with an older respected isiXhosa man whilst in the field made her feel safe. All the participants had a matric education, and six of the eight men had a tertiary qualification. All men were also employed and earned between R7000 and R25000 per month (US$470 and US$1700 per month). They were all financially maintaining their children and they were all in regular physical contact with their children and they were all non-resident fathers. All the children were using their mothers’ surnames and all the fathers explained that for their children to adopt their surnames, they must perform ilobola (to marry their children’s mothers). The fathers all reported their experiences of co-parenting to be satisfactory with some challenges relating to their desire for more hands-on fathering. With the exception of two fathers who were still waiting upon the woman’s family to approach their family, all the sampled fathers had paid between R6500 and R8000 (US$440 and US$540). The most dominant method of payment in this study sample was a non-fixed instalment plan payable over a period of 12 months or more, depending on both families’ agreement. With the exception of Thandisizwe, all the participants paid their intlawulo in instalments. The method of data analysis followed the ‘conceptual scaffoldings’ approach outlined by Spencer et al. (2003), which involved three overlapping stages. The first stage involved sorting and reducing the data by generating a set of codes. For example, we used “negotiation” as the initial broad structural code; we coded all data relating to the “negotiations” and sorted the data into different structural codes: (1) initiating a negotiation, (2) timing of negotiation (3) participating in negotiation, and (4) decision-making in negotiations. In the second stage of analysis, the nuances and tensions within each category were analyzed and incorporated into the analysis. For example, in some cases, the negotiation took place a long time after the pregnancy was discovered whilst in other cases it might happen soon after the

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pregnancy was revealed but that this was controlled by maternal kin. It became clear that the period of waiting for the father created a sense of uncertainty and ambiguity regarding the recognition of their position vis-à-vis the child. In the third stage, a typological classification was established to capture the range of strategies used by maternal kin to assert their power in reconfiguring relations and negotiating the terms of how a father will come to be. Two dimensions were used in the designation of these strategies— direct and indirect strategies for shaping the process of becoming a father within the customary negotiations. The four categories established were (1) waiting to be a father (2) becoming a responsible and respected father, (3) being flexible and reconciling families (4) and everyday fathering as an outsider. In what follows, we present the findings on four specific moments of the process where ‘fathering’ is being shaped. The first moment is when the mother announces the pregnancy to maternal kin and material kin assess what constitutes a ‘desirable father’. It is during this moment that the power of maternal kin to determine the fate of the father’s entry into the negotiations is experienced and fathers (to be) have to ‘wait’, ‘be engaged’ and be assessed. The second moment is when maternal kin meet paternal kin and paternity is assessed. During this moment fathers are expected to accept responsibility and be respectful towards the mother and maternal kin, with the subsequent consequences for the mother and her family. During this moment the power shifts as the paternal family and father have the power to deny the woman and her family respect by denying the pregnancy. The third moment takes place following acceptance of paternity where the maternal and paternal family negotiate the payment(s) and fatherhood is understood in terms of being flexible and reconciling families. The fourth moment is enacting fathering, whereby the fathers are managing fathering from a position of outsider status based on lineage. The final part of the chapter reviews how the process of an intlawulo shapes fathering practices from an African perspective.

Waiting to Be a Father The literature on intlawulo has outlined the ways in which (teenage) mothers dealt with the news of the pregnancy. Mkhwanazi (2014) outlined how a mother’s response to the news of a teenage daughter’s pregnancy was often one of anger. Such news not only brought shame to the home, albeit temporarily, it also cast a negative light on the mother for not having taught her daughter ‘proper conduct’ (Mkhwanazi, 2014). Our research focusing on the father’s perspective highlighted that the period following the discovery of a pregnancy was characterized by uncertainty. According to the custom, the father and his paternal family have to wait to be approached by the pregnant woman’s family. In the literature, Swartz and Bhana (2009) provided some evidence of maternal kin deciding not to engage in the process as the maternal kin, according to the father, did not see the father as desirable. ‘The

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family is a high-class family of which I don’t think they want anything to do with me. . . .maybe I’m no good to them, from their lifestyle, you know. Maybe that’s it’. In this study, one of the fathers, Xolani, has been waiting for a year for the process to happen: ‘[U]nfortunately, the parents didn’t come to report it and there is nothing that I am going to do. I am not going to volunteer and go and pay intlawulo. They must come. That’s how it’s done’. He says that ‘they can come at a later stage’ when they are ready but until then, the intlawulo process cannot take place. During this time, Xolani had access to the child but he was unable to become ‘a responsible father’ until such time as the maternal family decide to come. This demonstrates how interactions (or lack thereof) also lay in what the maternal kin could do to alter the ways the father and child relate to each other or how the father would be regarded by the community. More importantly, they allow us to bear witness to the texture of the lived experiences of becoming a father and the ways in which a mother and maternal kin invoke a period of waiting for the father. As a way of maintaining his responsibility and signaling his commitment, Xolani continued to support the child financially: ‘I feel responsible because there are people out there who just don’t care. They just do that and run away which is very bad. I am not like that because at least I can stand up for my actions.’ The strategy maternal kin and grandmothers employed to protect and maintain their family included delaying the process. Such actions by maternal kin draw us to the power of maternal kin to shape fatherhood. Whilst Xolani demonstrated his involvement, there may be some instances, as outlined by Swartz and Bhana (2009), when the maternal family don’t come. This period of waiting for maternal kin is characterized by insecurity. Fully understanding the role of intlawulo in a father’s involvement in his child’s life requires taking into account other parts of the process that extend beyond monetary fines. An important way to consider the power of the maternal kin and the authority they have in facilitating fathering includes considering the ways in which the fathers wait. One of the critical aspects of waiting is precisely the uncertainty – the lack of control or clarity about how long they must wait and whether the maternal family will come. During this time the fathers are persuaded to be patient as they wait for the maternal kin whilst experiencing insecurity about their involvement in the child’s life.

Becoming a Responsible and Respectful Father This is the stage where the acknowledgement of paternity is either accepted or denied by the man identified to be responsible for the woman’s pregnancy. The employed fathers in this research outlined how they experienced the next stage of the process, as one participant explained the process: She was taken to my family to find out and they came very early in the morning, even before you even wake up, you will hear the knock, then you will hear ‘we are here with’ this particular girl, they call her name, ‘and is so and so here? Is [Sipho] home?’ and then they say ‘yeah he is home.’ Then they will go and wake up. If you are sleeping outside, they will

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go and wake you up and then you come and gather your elders, your fathers, your uncles; if you don’t have uncles, your brothers.

The involvement of the elders through this process and in this manner where maternal kin come knocking, early in the morning, highlighted significant aspects of the process, including showing respect for maternal kin, as the participant is responsible for calling his elders and responding. The way in which the process takes place should be viewed as part of a range of strategies used by maternal kin revealing their power to reconfigure relations and negotiate the terms of how a father will come to be. A key part of the process involves the gathering of elders of both families, as Victor outlined: ‘It is just a communication and connection between the two families, showing some respect.’ There is respect for the mother’s family and the mother, ‘When you impregnate a girl, it means you have disrespected her parents so you have to pay’ and, as one participant stated: ‘once you impregnate a girl, you have disrespected her father’s wishes and robbed him of his dignity and pride.’ Mkhwanazi and Block (2016) argued that, given that early childbearing was seen to bring shame to both the girl and her family, the refusal to pay intlawulo was humiliating. The process of calling to the genitor’s house is a way of reclaiming respect. These moments of interaction give us a glimpse into the process of becoming a father. Swartz and Bhana (2009) argued that failure to accept paternity, if responsible, or to make an arrangement to pay, means that the father is guilty of disrespect, which itself can carry a fine. In such instances a father would be unable to attend the mother’s house. As on participant, Nyambe reported: I am not that kind of person who just goes there [mother’s house] just because I want to see my child because I respect that family. Also, because I know that I did damage her, I did make her pregnant and because I know that I didn’t pay the full fine, I just can’t go. That family doesn’t know me at all – they just know me from the pictures and phone calls only.

Furthermore, Nyambe associated the failure to perform the process as a cause for many societal ills: ‘This lack of communication that we see in our families, it’s creating these issues and we have all these undiagnosed problems that are arising from there.’ Accepting paternity is also about a man taking responsibility. The fathers in this study spoke about the acceptance of paternity as a way of accepting responsibility. As Thomas outlined: It’s something that one has to make sure that you understand and know that it’s not only about money but about taking responsibility of your actions because once you make someone pregnant you need to take responsibility. So it’s something that you can’t run away from, you have to understand it and follow it.

Responsibility here is not linked to financial provision or providing in the sense of breadwinning, but in respecting the values of becoming a father, i.e., being responsible and respecting elders. The customary process at play allows women and maternal kin to refashion and renegotiate fatherhood and this work done by them constitutes an important element in understanding fatherhood. But what happens if the father denies paternity? We have yet to provide the academic research that comprehensively delves into the issues around the performance and non-performance of intlawulo and how it shapes both fathers and mothers’ lives.

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Being and Reconciling Families Once the father has accepted paternity the families can begin to negotiate the fine. Similarly in this study, the maternal family were reported to have more control over dictating the terms and amount of intlawulo. One father, Thomas, explained why the maternal family controlled the process as he would still have to return to the maternal family to be involved with the child: the elders need to reach an agreement because I am not going to pay and disappear. I will need to come back and support the child. They would assign me a specific amount maybe like R1500 or R1000 that I need to pay every month.

All fathers spoke about the significance of the first cow (inkomo yobulungaa) meaning a cow that reconciles the families. As one father, Themba explained, it: . . .is the way of creating a relationship with that family so that when you need to see your child, you will not have to stand on the street waiting for the mother to bring the child to you, but you have the right to say “I am coming on Saturday, can I get my child’. There won”t be any problems.

Nyambe was given a month to pay off the compulsory cow then the rest was in instalments, but still on a monthly basis. It took him seven months to pay it off. Xolani summarized the significance of the first cow, and intlawulo more broadly, by stating: “as a Xhosa man, I need to do it. It wouldn’t be right if I don’t do it. Even if I take 100 years, it doesn’t matter but I must do it as a respect to your family.” Nkani (2017) outlined how, in the context of KwaZulu-Natal, the fine can include a charge for the cleansing of all virgins in the area (ukugeza izintombi), a goat (ingeza muzi) to cleanse the household, a cow (inkomo yomqhoyiso) which is “damages” for the loss of virginity and which is for her mother, a cow for her father for humiliating him in public by getting her pregnant before marriage, and lastly a goat for cleansing her father’s homestead. The charges indicated the communal significance of intlawulo. Mkhwanazi (2014) outlined that in 2001–2002, intlawulo ranged from R2500 to as high as R10000. Similarly, in this research we found that intlawulo ranged from R3000 to R8500 (approx. US$200 –$570). There was some evidence that the payment of intlawulo depended very much on the economic situation of the father, and some families were accommodating of the social and economic conditions that restricted the ability of a father and his family to pay (Nkani, 2017). In such instances maternal kin may allow the father access to his child, while payment was deferred until the economic situation improved (Nkani, 2017). In our findings, the participants spoke about how the assessment of the “fine” also related to the mother’s characteristics such as the educational attainment of the mother or whether she was a breadwinner or a first-time mother, as alluded to by Thomas: “they were saying that because it was her first time being pregnant and because she was the breadwinner at the house, that is why they end up to that R5000.” As part of the process, the maternal family may hold a fairly fixed position in seeking a specific amount. Swartz and Bhana (2009) outlined that the room for

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negotiation of the amount was limited “my father paid R5000. . . he had no choice. . .those are the rules. They were set there by elders, so they can’t just break them down.” By demonstrating the ways in which maternal kin shape the negotiate process and require flexibility and acquiescence on part of the father (and his kin), the findings highlight how maternal kin assert their authority and power and compel compliance.

Negotiating Fathering as an Outsider All fathers in the study were “involved” fathers; all fathers regularly saw their children and paid maintenance for their children. Performing intlawulo gave the fathers a real choice about engaging with their children. The fathers, however, had to negotiate the degree of involvement, especially with maternal grandparents and, in some cases, there were limits to what they could do. Nyambe described how he could only have overnight visits with his daughter when his girlfriend’s parents were away: They are avoiding me feeling like I am a father, or I have a family without paying lobola. They are trying to draw a solid line saying if you are going to marry my daughter, you are going to pay lobolo. . .even though I was supporting the child every month, giving money.

As noted above, upon completion of intlawulo, the father can have contact with the child, but he is still outside the lineage of the child. In this regard, the father defers to elder maternal kin members, and not the mother of the child. Themba, who lived with his son for the first two years, explained how the maternal grandparents decided to take the child to the Eastern Cape (approximately 900 km away). Themba tried to avoid this living arrangement but he explained how this was not possible. “His grandparents said no, let us look after him [the child] now. They wanted him there. Apparently, he is the only boy there. There are lots of girls so they wanted him very much.” Themba yearned to change this situation but acknowledged that where his child lives “doesn’t depend on me or his mother, it depends on the elderly people [maternal grandparents].” The hierarchy and authority does not depend on gender but on lineage and then authority within lineage from senior to junior. Mtura, a father of two children, captures this sentiment vividly: And they said, this R5000 doesn’t mean this baby belongs to you. You know amongst the amaXhosa, if you are not married, the child belongs to the mother’s family. So we just created a relationship for you and your son. You can come anytime to visit and ask to get him at least for a weekend or a week if you are off or if you are on leave so you can stay with him and spend quality time with him.

Whilst maternal grandparents exercise authority in many cases, they can also act as facilitators when the father and mother of the child are no longer in a relationship. Intlawulo and the role of connecting the families ensures the fathers can continue to have a relationship with the child even if the relationship with the mother has ended, as Victor described:

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. . . when it comes to the child because, even if we fight with the mother of the child, I can go to the house and see my child because everyone knows that I am the father and they know that I paid the fine. And even when you have problems, you can phone the family and say we have problems like this and maybe they are gonna help you both.

The adoption and use of surnames indicate which lineage and clan a child belongs to. As Mkhize and Muthuki (2019) outlined, it signified to outsiders the individual’s identity, clan origins, the family dynamics as well as their destiny. None of the children in our study used the father’s surname, as this is a privilege that comes with performing lobolo, according to the sample of men. However, some fathers did state that depending on the families involved, some children (boys) may adopt their surname when they reach a certain age where they have to undergo a traditional ritual called ukwaluka which includes traditional circumcision. Victor is hoping that his first-born son will change his surname before he is taken to initiation school. He believes that it is important for his child to adopt his name so that he knows his roots. In his own words he explained: “So that he knows that he doesn’t belong to the mother’s family but to us. He can’t use his mother’s surname while I am still here because it’s me who is going to take him to initiation school.” Becoming a father in this context is not just about intlawulo and the ability to care and provide financially, but it carries significant meanings about the relationships between families, communities and ancestors.

Discussion and Conclusion This chapter has explored how fathers in a South African context experience intlawulo and how this shapes the process of becoming a father. By examining customary process and exploring the roles of maternal kin in negotiating fatherhood, the findings expand our understanding of becoming a father and the relational dynamics that create experiences of uncertainty but also practices of responsibility, flexibility, and respect. The central argument put forward is that evidence of these processes of becoming a father and the process of waiting, being flexible and respectful indicate the power of maternal kin to shape fatherhood even when the agency is located often in indirect actions or inactions. The authors propose that we begin to examine these direct and indirect actions (or inactions). Recognizing the power of customary processes and how they are negotiated through multiple actors allows us to explore the process of becoming a father and the often-hidden power that maternal kin exercise when negotiating fatherhood and fathering. The findings show how this sample of employed fathers respect the process of intlawulo as they indicate how the meanings embedded in the process facilitate their role in a child’s life through restoring and building relations with maternal kin. Respecting the process is not measured against the acquisition of status and ability to “pay”, but it is measured against the ability to build an intimate relationship with the

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child, mother and maternal kin and to contribute to the security of the child, however that is secured. We do not argue that intlawulo restricts men’s involvement in a child’s life nor do we argue that the process rules out the exercise of individual choice and experiences. We argue that through performing intlawulo, the father’s needs to be involved are exercised in service of the child, maternal family and community as a whole. Through this process, fatherhood is shaped relationally whereby values and practices of patience, flexibility, and respect are prioritized. This chapter also highlights how fatherhood is negotiated with respect to lineage, gender and seniority in men’s lives, and the experiences and consequences thereof. Scholars who push us to consider the relational dynamics in shaping fatherhood, allow us to look beyond gender relations and inequalities based on sex. Whilst attention has been given to the role of maternal and paternal kin (Madhavan & Roy, 2012) in shaping fathering, this chapter goes further by outlining not only how related others shape fathering but more importantly how hierarchal structures exist, in relation to a child, based on lineage. Through the building of relationships with maternal kin, the men in this study have become involved in their children’s lives. Given that this study did not obtain the voices of mothers or members of the maternal kin, more research should pay attention to the ways in which women shape fatherhood, as it is crucial to understanding the relational power involved in the process. The authors acknowledge that the study has several limitations. Given the authors’ outsider positionalities, the accounts presented here may not fully reflect the nuances of experiences. Furthermore, the urban context in which the sample of isiXhosa fathers live may prioritize certain voices and practices with regards to paying intlawulo, to an extent that the voices and experiences of rural based men or men belonging to different ethnicities are excluded. Moreover, the authors do not argue that the findings in this study are instructive for different ethnicities given the different histories and processes of codifying customary law that took place during colonialism and apartheid. The authors recognize that the findings would be enhanced by including accounts of maternal and paternal kin members and rural based men who belong to different ethnic groups; unfortunately resources did not allow for this in this study. The authors acknowledge that for many fathers, the ability to perform intlawulo in the current context of high levels of unemployment and poverty is unobtainable. Widening the research focus to include groups of men who were unable to go through the process due to constrained economic resources would shed light on the ways in which maternal kin facilitate men’s changing economic circumstances. Despite the limitations, the research makes important contributions to how the process of intlawulo and the role of maternal kin shape fathering for a group of isiXhosa men who have the resources to perform intlawulo. The findings in the chapter speak to some of the contemporary challenges of child rearing in a changing society from an international perspective. Firstly, fatherhood has often been defined through a Eurocentric, white perspective which assumes fatherhood to be biological or based on marriage or statutory laws. This chapter provides an understanding of becoming a father in African contexts, which offers an

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alternative and much needed addition to theorising fathering by understanding the role of customs, lineage, and extended families in shaping the process of becoming a father. The chapter adds to thinking around the social and customary law processes involved in making fathers. It also provides insight into the relational dynamics that shape fathering and mothering in collective societies. Furthermore, the chapter reveals the ways in which black fathers in South Africa, not unlike other parts of the world, are involved in fathering. Given the strong stereotype of absent black fathers across the globe, this chapter reveals the ways fathers get to be involved. It improves our understanding of how race, and lineage intersect in shaping men’s fathering practices. The chapter also extends our understanding of the role of women as gatekeepers to fatherhood by focussing on women as mothers and women within maternal families in a patrilineal society. Moving beyond a focus on the father-mother-child triad, as a way of understanding fathering, allows us to see the way different women in the community, as maternal family members, paternal grandmothers, aunties or sisters shape fathering. Given the critical role that women and maternal kin play in facilitating fathering, the chapter’s investigation of maternal-paternal negotiations and their influence on how men practice fatherhood is much needed. The chapter prioritises the local context in which black men live and the social realities they face when trying to become a father. The focus on black fathers and black fathers from the African continent, indicate how childrearing is a negotiated process involving gendered, generational and lineage-based divisions. Acknowledgments An earlier version of this article was published as “Understanding customary practices and fatherhood: intlawulo, masculinities and relational power. CSSR Working Paper 453. (Cape Town: Centre for Social Science Research, University of Cape Town). http://www.cssr.uct. ac.za/cssr/pub/wp/453 The support of the DSI-NRF Centre of Excellence in Human Development at the University of the Witwatersrand, Johannesburg in the Republic of South Africa towards this research is hereby acknowledged. Opinions expressed and conclusions arrived at, are those of the author and are not to be attributed to the CoE in Human Development.

References Abdill, A. M. (2018). Fathering from the margins: An intimate examination of black fatherhood. Columbia University Press. https://doi.org/10.1086/703435 Bennett, T. W. (2004). Customary law in South Africa. Kluwer. Bhana, D., & Nkani, N. (2014). When African teenagers become fathers: Culture, materiality and masculinity. Culture, Health & Sexuality, 16(4), 337–350. https://doi.org/10.1080/13691058. 2014.887780 Budlender, D., & Lund, F. (2011). South Africa: A legacy of family disruption. Development and Change, 42(4), 925–946. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781118297261.ch3 Clark, S., Cotton, C., & Marteleto, L. J. (2015). Family ties and young fathers’ engagement in Cape Town, South Africa. Journal of Marriage and Family, 77(2), 575–589. https://doi.org/10.1111/ jomf.12179 Coles, R. L. (2009). The best kept secret: Single black fathers. Rowman & Littlefield Publishers.

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Moore, E., & Himonga, C. (2018). Living customary law and families in South Africa. Children, Families and the State, 61. Moore, E,. & Seekings, J. (2019). Consequences of Social Protection on Intergenerational Relationships in South Africa. Critical Social Policy, 39(4), 513–524. https://doi.org/10.1177/ 0261018319867582 Morrell, R., Dunkle, K., Ibragimov, U., & Jewkes, R. (2016). Fathers who care and those that don’t: Men and childcare in South Africa. South African Review of Sociology, 47(4), 80–105. https:// doi.org/10.1080/21528586.2016.1204240 Murray, C. (1981). Families divided: The impact of migrant labour in Lesotho (Vol. 29). Cambridge university press. Mvune N. (2017). ‘Ubaba ukona kodwa angikabi namandla’: Navigating teenage fatherhood in rural KwaZulu-Natal. In Mkhwanazi, N., & Bhana, D. (Eds.). Young families: Gender, sexuality and care (pp. 131–143). Nkani, N. (2017) Rethinking and mediating fathers’ involvements in families: The negotiation of intlawulo. In Mkhwanazi, N., & Bhana, D. (Eds.), Young families: Gender, sexuality and care (pp. 109–118). Nzegwu, N. U. (2012). Family matters: Feminist concepts in African philosophy of culture. SUNY Press. Oyěwùmí, O. (1997). The invention of women: Making an African sense of western gender discourses. U of Minnesota Press. Posel, D. (2014). Gender inequality. In A. Hirsch, R. Kanbur, & M. Ncube (Eds.), Bhorat, H (pp. 303–310). The oxford companion to the economics of South Africa. https://doi.org/10. 1093/acprof:oso/9780199689248.001.0001 Rabe, M. (2007). My children, your children, our children? Fathers, female partners and household structures. South African Review of Sociology, 38(2), 161–175. https://doi.org/10.1080/ 21528586.2007.10419173 Ramphele, M. (1993). A bed called home: Life in the migrant labour hostels of Cape Town. New Africa Books. Richter, L., & Morrell, R. (2006). Baba: Men and fatherhood in South Africa. HSRC Press. Spencer L, Ritchie J, and O’Connor, L. 2003. Analysis: Practices, principles and processes. In Ritchie, J., Lewis, J., Nicholls, C. M., & Ormston, R. (Eds.). Qualitative research practice: A guide for social science students and researchers (pp. 220–257). Sage. Swartz, S., & Bhana, A. (2009). Teenage Tata: Voices of young fathers in South Africa. HSRC Press. Swartz, S., Bhana, A., Richter, L., & Versfeld, A. (2013, January). Promoting young fathers’ positive involvement in their children’s lives. HSRC Policy Brief. http://hdl.handle.net/20. 500.11910/3140

Elena Moore is an Associate Professor of Sociology at the University of Cape Town. She is the author of Generation, Gender and Negotiating Custom in South Africa (Routledge, 2022), Divorce, Families and Emotion Work (Palgrave, 2017) and (with Chuma Himonga) Reform of Customary Marriage, Divorce and Succession in South Africa (Juta & Co. 2015). Her work examines kinship, care, gender, intergenerational relations, customary law, family law and policy. She is the co-editor of Families, Relationships and Societies. For more see www.elenamoore.co.za. Orchid https:// orcid.org/0000-0002-0744-9826 Jill Samukimba is a PhD candidate in the department of Sociology at the University of Cape Town. She holds a bachelor’s in Gender Studies and Sociology and an MPhil in Development Studies. Her research interests are in the sociology of the family, particularly concerning customary practices, relational power, childcare, and fatherhood. Her current research is exploring the role of mothers and social actors as active agents in influencing, shaping, and constructing fathering among amaXhosa in South Africa.

Transnational Parenthood Esra Demirkol Colosio

Introduction The understanding of transnationalism is one of the fundamental ways of understanding the practices of immigrants in respect to their home countries and their non-immigrant family members across borders. As defined by Basch et al. (1994, p.6), transnationalism is “a process by which migrants, through their daily activities, forge and sustain multi-stranded social, economic and political relations that link together their societies of origin and settlement, and through which they create social fields that cross national boundaries”. With the construction of transnational relations, the family has become one of the units of analysis used to observe the complex web of socio-economic relations between home and host countries. Using transnationalism to understand the practices between immigrants and their-non migrant relatives has increased in the last three decades (Hondagneu-Sotelo & Avila, 1997; Levitt, 2001a; Schmalzbauer, 2004; Parreñas, 2005; Smith, 2005; Dreby & Adkins, 2010; Carling et al., 2012; Wilding & Baldassar, 2018). Focusing on migrant families through transnationalism is not only important for understanding the construction of familyhood in the transnational social field. It also shows us how the socio-economic, political and economic characteristics of host and home countries are crucial to understanding the relations between separated migrant families’ members. The increased research into transnationalism in the early 1990s brought about the recognition of the important role that the migrant family plays in building transnational relations between home and host countries. The efforts within academia to examine the impact of international migration on families whose members are dispersed across two or more national boundaries aim to understand how

E. D. Colosio (*) Department of Sociology, Çankırı Karatekin University, Çankırı, Turkiye e-mail: [email protected] © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_29

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international migration impacts family members’ lives. These types of families are defined as ‘transnational families’, which are “families that live some or most of the time separated from each other, yet hold together and create something that can be seen as a feeling of collective welfare and unity, namely ‘familyhood’, even across national borders” (Bryceson & Vuorela, 2002, p.3). As emigration continues from almost every other country in the world in different forms, research increases into the impact of migration on family lives and arrangements between family members. Bearing this in mind, it is important to investigate transnational migrant families considering today’s conditions, such as the increase in cheap virtual communication technologies (Vertovec, 2004) and polymedia (Madianou & Miller, 2012) as well as increased numbers of cheap flights (King et al., 2013a, b), which contribute to the formation and adaptation of family practices in the case of families where one member has migrated. The need to do family was mainly fulfilled through the use of new communication technologies, which, at the same time, facilitated some forms of social control and contributed to stronger feelings of shared experiences and meanings despite the hard separation between family members. As parenthood is mainly regarded as a choice, but, shaped by strong popular debates on the fact that parents should provide moral and material support to their children (Chambers & Gracia, 2022), migrant parents also contribute to these discussions on childcare and are expected to prove their parenting even from far away. In this regard, the studies on transnational parenting are presented in this chapter as studies on the topic have been increasing over the last two decades and brought about a new area to discover within familyhood and parenthood research.

Transnational Families How do we define family? Or can we describe family through a single term? Should family only exist in the same geographical context? Even though we have a basic level definition of ‘family’ within dictionaries, we cannot refer to one single definition or formula to understand it. A family is composed of interdependent lives that change consistently over time; “. . .the life course of families is cyclical, in that family roles and relationships at each stage are eventually occupied by new members. As a person moves through time, he or she occupies various positions in the life course (e.g., child, sibling, partner, parent, widow), but the cycle of the family spirals on, beyond any one person’s life course” (Allen & Henderson, 2016, p. 7). Families take different forms, and vary according to age, race, class, gender, and sexual orientation, or show variances in household structure. There are the nuclear and extended family households and recent forms such as “living apart together” families (Levin & Trost, 1999), or transnational families (Bryceson & Vuorela, 2002), formed as a result of the migration of a family member for socio-economic/political reasons, who build a family life across borders.

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With increasing attention to transnational families, there are various attempts to define and point out the importance of the concept of ‘transnational family’ within migrant transnationalism. According to Bryceson and Vuorela (2002, p. 3), transnational families are “families that live some or most of the time separated from each other, yet hold together and create something that can be seen as a feeling of collective welfare and unity, namely ‘familyhood’, even across national borders”. Mas Giralt and Bailey (2010) argue that there are liquid life paths among migrants and non-migrants, which contribute to the formation of transnational families. Socioeconomic and cultural practices shared among transnational family members in different geographical localities are important for constructing liquid, interdependent life paths. It could be argued that transnational family members create their own imagined everyday practices through their connections beyond borders. In addition, while Vertovec (2009, p.61) asserts that “the provenance of most everyday migrant transnationalism is within families”, Herrera Lima (2001, p.78) has argued that the transnational family is “one of the most important social institutions that makes possible the operation and persistence of transnational social spaces”. Studies on contemporary migration flows, using transnationalism as a theoretical framework, provide detailed knowledge about migrants’ socio-economic, political and cultural actions beyond countries (Levitt et al., 2003). In this context, family is one of the units of analysis for observing the construction of transnational moral (e.g. emotional support) and material (e.g. remittances) ties between the origin country and the destination country. In the field of transnational migration studies, increased attention has been paid to family practices among migrants and their non-migrant relatives living in the home country. Focusing on migrant families is important for understanding transnational practices, which bring changes in both the sending and receiving countries in socio-economic, cultural and political terms (Portes et al., 1999; Levitt, 2001a, b). Transnational families, nuclear or extended, are dispersed across international borders. Migrant members of the family spend definite or indefinite, long or short periods of time in the country of destination for different reasons, such as providing better living conditions for the left-behind family in the country of origin. The different geographical locations and the fluidity of the duration of the separation of the migrant member of the family and his/her left behind family members bring changes in the established family characteristics. For many immigrants today, the main motivation to leave their families behind, particularly their children, is to provide them a better future (Carling et al., 2012). The impact of transnational migration on family life and parenting practices gives an account of how immigrants and their stayed behind children experience the separation and how their relationships, parenting practices and emotional connections are maintained and redefined in the construction of transnational family webs while living apart for an undefined and extended period.

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Transnational Parenthood The decision of a family member to migrate inevitably brings fears and doubts for the family members. The discourse on the ‘family’s sake’, which was repeated many times during my interviews, is the only acceptable legitimation for either side. This legitimisation is strengthened by the discourse on the betterment of the children’s future. For either side, the idea of providing a better future for their children, which is seen as one of the key responsibilities in both being a family and being parents, is the prime motivation for confronting their fears and doubts. The men’s fears of not being able to fulfil their traditional role as ‘breadwinners’ appear to be the main pushing factor for migration, while the role of the female members of the household or the children in the decision process tends to be underemphasised. In this sense, the migration has the purpose from its inception of ‘doing family’ (Morgan, 1996, 2011), reproducing roles that the men of the household would find difficult to realise by staying in their hometown. This can be seen as a main difference from cases where the female members have to migrate (Kofman, 1999; Ryan, 2002; Asis et al., 2004; Dannecker, 2005; Parreñas, 2001, 2005, 2010; Hoang, 2011), leading to a reshaping and contestation of the family roles also on the ideological level. This stress on doing family and reproducing a set of values and hierarchies constitutes the central discussion of this chapter, locating it among the studies on transnational families. The transnational perspective focuses on the immigrant family and, in particular, forms of transnational parenting that redefine the meanings and practices of motherhood and fatherhood. Understanding transnational parenting means exploring how the parent-child relationship is shaped and transformed (Carling et al., 2012) as well as questioning one’s own understanding of their assigned mother’s and father’s roles beyond the national borders. The effort to understand transnational relations also illustrates the difficulties of relationships between families and their children. Due to the gendered nature of parenting, it is not possible to say that the experiences of mothers and fathers are similar within transnational families. As Carling et al. (2012) state, migration creates tension in traditional gender relations. At this point, some studies argue that expectations from immigrant mothers and fathers about parenting are different and are shaped by gender roles, which are discussed below.

Transnational Motherhood Early research within migration studies focused almost entirely on male immigrants, while women were assumed to play a passive role as companions. Commenting on the topic, in one of the earliest studies on migration and women, British urban anthropologist Anthony Leeds in his 1976 article mentions “the category of ‘women’ seems to me a rhetorical one, not one which has (or can be proved to have) generic scientific utility” and also characterizes the focus on this category as

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“individualistic, reductionist, and motivational” (Leeds, 1976 in Hondagneu-Sotelo, 2005). Leeds argued that focusing on women would distract attention from the structural processes of capitalist exploitation. This discourse, in fact, has already expressed its judgment in itself: the argument that women do not exist in economic structures and are kept outside the web of capitalist relations. It would not be surprising that such male-dominated prejudices at that time interpreted women as dependent and interpreted women as passive individuals who followed their spouses only for family reunification. However, in the 1970s and 1980s, there were studies showing that women also took an active role in migratory movements (Pessar & Mahler, 2003). Silva (1996, p.12) says that in almost all societies, motherhood is socially defined and is an institution with its own rules. The institution we call motherhood emerged with late modernity; women did not have a legitimate status as mothers before the middle of the nineteenth century. Children took their fathers surnames, religions, residences, and inheritances (Smart, 1996, p. 44). From the 1970s, the work of feminist writers made fatherhood more visible as a social institution than a biological destiny (Thorne & Yalom, 1982). The dominant ideology of ‘good’ motherhood as selfless, caring responsibility towards children started to be discussed within migrant transnationalism, too. Transnational motherhood, which has developed as a result of the migration of increasing numbers of women due to the growth of long-distance parenting (Carling et al., 2012) and particularly the growth of the gender-based workforce. By transnational motherhood, Hondagneu-Sotelo & Avila refer to “. . .the circuits of affection, caring, and financial support that transcend national borders. . .” (1997, p. 550) and the daily lives of transnational mothers include “geographies, the economy, and the constant negotiation of social and familial roles” (Millman, 2013, p. 73). Umut Erel (2002, p. 132) observes “the separation of mothers and children runs counter to hegemonic discourses on the mother as the primary carer of her children, and the emotional, physical and geographical proximity closeness that is claimed and naturalized by such discourses”. Erel’s study focuses on the experiences of motherhood of 15 mothers from Turkey in Germany in 1996 and 1999. Selfrepresentations of migrant women of Turkish origin give a more complex view of maternal relationships and migration than stereotypical ideologies with tradition. The maternal relationship has been changed and challenged by the migration process. Some of the married women who migrated on their own have challenged the role of main provider within the family, which in turn may have reversed the gendered division of labour. The migration process has often caused mothers and their children to be separated for a long time. This does not fit traditional expectations in the conceptualization of hegemonic motherhood. Family members in Turkey temporarily practiced the role of mother for immigrant mothers’ children. Such experiences are defined as painful for both mothers and children by the participants within the study. How can one be physically absent and continue to be a “good” mother? There are various examples of this among immigrant mothers who often decide to leave their children with their own mothers or sisters (Schmalzbauer, 2004). Often, migrant

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mothers change their minds about what it means to be a good mother to accommodate their decision to live and work separately from their children. According to Hondagneu-Sotelo & Avila (1997), mothers convince themselves that their children are doing better at home and that their physical absence does not mean emotional absence. Peruvian immigrant women in Chile, for example, view leaving their children behind as “. . .part of an exercise of responsible motherhood. . .motivated by the need to secure family welfare. It is because of an almost heroic sense of responsibility and love for her children that a mother embarks on a journey to an unknown land, even if it means separation from her loved ones” (Illanes, 2010, p. 211). An important example among these studies is the work of Parreñas. Parreñas (2001, p. 381) defines ‘mothering from a distance’ by Filipino immigrant women, with reference to a form of ‘commodified love’ that consists in buying things to be sent to the children left behind. In order to cope with the burden they are under, there is a satisfaction trying to be provided through the material, even though there is also a grumbling from children. When women become immigrants, their families are seen as broken and women are also judged more negatively if they leave their children behind. Parreñas states that immigrant women work hard to avoid this prejudice: . . .the meanings that social actors attach to their intimate relationships have to take into account normative constructions of “good motherhood” in which “being there” is paramount: loss of intimacy and a lack of reciprocal knowledge due to physical absence may therefore lead to feelings of guilt and suffering (in mothers), as well as charges of inadequacy and contestation of roles and authority (in children) (Bonizzoni, 2015, p.170).

Transnational Fatherhood In many cultures, the father is still regarded as the pillar of the family. He takes the family members under his wing. Since childcare is largely considered women’s sphere of activity, it is difficult to perceive fathers’ activities with their children as a form of parenting in their own terms. Fatherhood is differentiated into father involvement (direct time with children), accessibility (at home), and responsibility (providing care and availability of resources) (Lamb et al., 1987). The assessment of fatherhood as a set of activities beyond the provider role raises questions about whether there is something distinctive in fathers’ activities with their children compared to mothers’. Research on fathers’ involvement in their children’s daily lives, for example, shows that fathers are less likely than mothers to engage in ‘rough and tumble’ play and take the children on outings such as sports activities. While there is evidence of changing attitudes supporting more fathers’ involvement and single-parent households, and studies in the US show a significant increase of loneparent households (Casper & Bianchi, 2002), there are still strong cultural and structural processes going on.

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How do fathers define their fatherhood and how do they narrate the transformation after the migration? In fact, in many studies, they do not think of it from a very different perspective. Indeed, their point of departure or emphasis is also ‘an awareness of a sense of duty’. In other words, the actions of a man as a father also figure in these definitions, in terms of both his notion of fatherhood and also how this notion was transformed and reshaped as a result of migration. While the mothers’ discourse is primarily shaped by the bringing up of the children in a good way, the fathers’ is rather shaped by authority. Compared to transnational motherhood literature (Hondagneu-Sotelo & Avila, 1997; Parreñas, 2001, 2005, 2010; Schmalzbauer, 2004; Mummert, 2005; Madianou, 2012; Madianou & Miller, 2012), the small body of work on transnational fathering examines how expectations of gendered roles for fathers are apparent across borders (Parreñas, 2008; Kilkey et al., 2014; Chereni, 2015; Souralová & Fialová, 2017; Poeze, 2019). Transnational migration reinforces gender ideologies such as that fathers/husbands are breadwinners, decision-makers and authority figures. Besides, some scholars also show how migrant fathers suffer emotionally because of longing and question those gendered roles expected of them. Transnational fathering is also “primarily demonstrated through the display of authority and imposition of discipline on children. By projecting authority, physically distant fathers can project the role of a disciplining ‘father figure’” (Parreñas, 2008, p.1058). During separation, men try to control their families from afar, as in the main message of displaying family practices: “[t]hese are my family relationships, and they work” (Finch, 2007, p.73). The father is still taken to be an authority figure although he is thousands of kilometres away, and women are still regarded as housewives. On the other hand, migrant men are also aware that they cannot fulfil their responsibilities and roles completely. After providing for the household, paternity practices, whether immigrant or not, are not so questioned. Dreby (2006) notes that men’s and women’s emotional responses to separation from their children differ, and relates this to gender ideology in Mexico, where a woman’s role as a mother is “sanctified” while the father’s role is linked to financial provision. Dreby (2006, p. 56) concludes as follows: . . . gender distinctions in transnational parenting, notable in mothers’ and fathers’ distinct migration patterns and emotional responses to separation, are tied to Mexican gender ideology. While the conditions of migration may change Mexican gender expectations within marital relationships. . ., gender expectations in parenting to be durable in the transnational context. Migration does not appear to significantly transform notions of Mexican motherhood and fatherhood even though it does change parenting activities. Fathers’ relationships with their children are directly related to their ability to honourably fulfil the role of economic provider for the family. When fathers are successful economically as migrants, they tend to maintain stable and regular relationships with children in Mexico regardless of marital status. In contrast, even though Mexican mothers migrate to work like fathers, their relationships with children once abroad depend on their ability to demonstrate emotional intimacy from a distance.

Thus, a critical question is how paternity and masculinity are redefined or reaffirmed in relation to migration. According to Pribilsky (2012), it is not just about sending money. The important thing is to do this in a disciplined way. In his work with

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Ecuadorian fathers in New York, and according to them, this is the real transformation. In Ecuador, they are now responsible for the household economy that their spouses handle. According to their own statements, they state how they even cut down on the alcohol they used to consume in order to send money to their children, how they changed their habits, and how being a father requires it. It is no longer alcohol that defines masculinity, but saving money requires both masculinity and paternity. The relationship constructed on this material is observed in both transnational mothers and fathers. However, it should be noted that from a gender perspective, while men still do not face any other judgment as long as they send their money and stay in touch, a similar situation cannot exist for women who make the same effort. Because she is still expected to be at home. Some migrant fathers expressed their separation in more descriptive ways about why they were abroad, how they felt about living apart from their spouses and children, and what their family meant to them. They express these emotions in relation to ideas about sacrifice, nostalgia, love, sadness, and anxiety - all completely against the ideas of what it means to be the man they grew up with.

Different Aspects of Transnational Parenthood Practices In the field of transnational migration studies, there has been increased attention to family practices among migrants and their non-migrant relatives living in the home country because the migration of a family member brings about changes in the established traditional characteristics of family and family members’ roles (Bryceson & Vuorela, 2002). Transnational parenting or caregiving is an important practice that transnational families undertake. Transnational parenthood encompasses how a parent (it could be mother, father or both) and child/ren experience family life as being physically separated. According to Carling et al. (2012), parenting roles are strongly gendered. During the last decade, with the feminisation of migration, different kinds of experiences have been observed between transnational mothers and transnational fathers as a result of those gendered parenting roles. In other words, transnational motherhood and transnational fatherhood are diverse phenomena. “The gendering of migration opportunities sometimes creates tensions with traditional gender relations, as when mothers migrate and assume a breadwinner role. When fathers migrate, the parenting role of the mother can also change as a consequence of her being the de facto head of household” (Carling et al., 2012, p.192). Even traditional gender roles bring about tensions within the migrant family; it is not possible to ignore how these roles function in the construction of transnational parenthood. In their study, Ryan et al. (2009) focus on Polish migration to the UK after Poland’s accession to the European Union in May 2004, and how family relations changed in terms of caring, support and responsibilities. They explore how, although both men and women leave their children or their elderly relatives in Poland, women are still expected to remain actively involved in transnational care

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more than men. Men are even expected not to assume these kinds of transnational caregiving responsibilities. Similarly, Zontini (2004) also examines how transnational care continues to be a gendered activity in the case of the everyday experiences of Moroccan and Filipino migrant women living in the city of Barcelona. Even though they are far away from their homes, women are still regarded as the primary care givers. On the other hand, Parreñas (2008, p.1070) shows the continuum of men’s roles among transnational Filipino migrant men: In the transnational families of migrant men, gender boundary crossings are limited at best. . . Efforts of migrant fathers to nurture from a distance, communicate regularly with their children, and reconstitute fathering to not centre on disciplining could enhance intergenerational relationships in transnational families. Yet, performances of transnational fathering usually conform to traditional gender norms of male breadwinning and male authoritarianism. Transnational fathers discipline and impose authority on their children from a distance.

Communication Recent developments in technology provide transnational families with a unique opportunity to be involved in one another’s lives (Levitt, 2001a; Licoppe, 2004; Vertovec, 2004; Wilding, 2006; Madianou & Miller, 2012; Baldassar et al., 2016). In the last decade, there has been a growing interest in understanding the role of communication technologies, particularly mediated communication, in the creation of transnational social spaces between immigrant parents and their non-migrant children. In the age of new communication technologies, and in polymedia environments (Madianou & Miller, 2012) geographic distances become more tolerable thanks to the perception of being able to connect at any time. This allows immigrants and their left-behind family members to take part in each other’s lives no matter how far they are from each other, even though they are living in different time zones. Nowadays Information and Communication Technologies (ICTs) intensify the communication of immigrants with their kin, which helps immigrants and non-immigrant family members stay connected. In other words, being connected via the internet continuously, any time, anywhere, becomes a norm for separated migrant families after a while. The daily, ordinary conversations continue over the internet as if people are physically in the same house. For both sides, the ICTs seem to be supporting for this new transnational family life that has been established, by enabling people to maintain emotional relations, to cope with the feeling of longing, to satisfy mutual curiosity on the left-behind homeland and the new country and to be able to feel the presence of each other. The ‘absent presence’ via ICTs requires a reconsideration of intimacy and care in transnational families. Many transnational families indeed only maintain minimal intimacy, demonstrated by most of the interviewees showing that they have very limited emotional attachment to their extended family members. It is crucial to note that, in first place, these families’ relationships were reconstructed around polymedia after separation. In other research, especially those in which women leave their

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families to go to work, we see that women struggle significantly to carry out their duties as mothers (Parreñas, 2001, 2010; Schmalzbauer, 2004; Madianou, 2012). Fathers frame themselves as authority figures or figures who ‘lay claim to’ their children and keep their wives under surveillance, and, in this way, they reproduce their culturally determined roles via communication as in other studies (Parreñas, 2008).

Emotions and Intimacy Although increased and developed communication technologies establish a strong connection with the home, Wilding (2006) also points out this “virtual connectedness/intimacy” is not sufficient on difficult days, e.g. when one becomes ill and needs personal care. In such cases, calling a family member or having a Skype interview would not be enough to provide the intimate care needed, which could result in psychological tensions, such as guilt or anxiety. Even though e-mails and telephone calls appear to eliminate the distances, time and space differences become obvious once more through experiencing tragedies such as a relative’s illness or death. As Wilding (2006, p.138) mentions: . . .ICTs have not created a world in which the extended family network has become a ‘virtual family’, or family events are constructed solely in cyberspace. There is no new or radical separation between virtual and real life, and certainly no virtual family has come to supplant the family that is situated in geographic space. . . Although cyberspace and virtual communications provide a useful addition to family practices, they do not displace them. . . Indeed, the ICTs are used primarily to enable and supplement the continuation of existing family practices.

Although communication tools are claimed to open up close relations in transnational families, this cannot be applied to every single case. Migrant parents try to compensate for their absence from their homes by being online, just as Dreby (2006) uncovered similar painful relationships between Mexican migrants and their families in the late 1990s and early 2000s. Phone calls and remittances are the main tools for coping with separation. However, she found that sending gifts or clothes that were age inappropriate proved that migrant parents become ‘parents on the phone’ or ‘paycheck fathers’ (Mummert, 2005) after a while. In the case of transnational fathers, even though they have doubts about their ability to exert authority, they continue to perform conventional fathering as Parreñas (2008, p.1058) mentions: “[t]ransnational fathering is primarily demonstrated through the display of authority and imposition of discipline on children” and in the age of advanced communication technologies, this authoritarian father figure is realised through constant phone or video calls. The ‘co-presence’ via polymedia (Madianou & Miller, 2012) requires a reconsideration of intimacy in transnational families (Baldassar et al., 2016). While ICTs provide parents and children with an opportunity to communicate both more frequently and virtually, banal communication becomes manifest in terms of

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transnationalism. Mentioned before, this is also a way of ‘doing family’ (Morgan, 1996, 2011) in a transnational context. In other words, having daily conversations as if they were physically together helps immigrants and their left-behind children to struggle through the emotional distress they face because of separation. In other studies, especially those in which women leave their families to go to work, we see that women struggle a lot to carry out their duties as mothers (Parreñas, 2001, 2010; Schmalzbauer, 2004; Madianou, 2012). Fathers mainly frame themselves as authority figures or figures who ‘lay claim to’ their children and monitor the movements of their wives, and, in this way, they reproduce their culturally determined roles via communication tools.

Conclusion For the majority of migrants, moving to another country is seen as an opportunity to alleviate the family’s economic difficulties and, particularly, to secure their children’s future. Transnational migrant family members keep ‘doing’ and ‘displaying’ familyhood because of the social structure that they live within. This does not mean that when family members live together they do not perform these practices; these practices evolve in the case of transnational migrant families as they still hold the same gender ideologies that they have always had. In migrant families, their gendered ideologies related to parenthood continue even when the physical location where they live changes. Even when family members experience physical distance from each other, the values and practices assigned to parenthood are maintained. Transnational migrant families combine examples of values attributed to parenthood in their own societies, and their experience is more complex and emotionally difficult as they live in limbo, in the sense of having no clear idea about when this physical distance will end. The decision of a family member to migrate inevitably brings fears and doubts for the family members. The discourse on the ‘family’s/ children’s sake’ seems the only acceptable legitimation for either side. This legitimisation is strengthened by the discourse on the betterment of the children’s future. For either side, the idea of providing a better future for their children, which is seen as one of the key responsibilities in being parents, is the prime motivation for confronting their fears and doubts. Family is considered to be “the most important and enduring of all human social groupings” (Smith & Hamon, 2012, p.7). It is, at the same time, an environment that expects its members to sacrifice themselves for the benefit of others and to prioritise their family over themselves (Schwartz, 2007, p.101). As the principle is based on the idea of the unity of the family, it should stay together whatever happens. Even when family members are physically separated, they still feel the need to make an effort to protect the family as ‘an imagined community’ (Anderson, 2006). The family turns into an ‘imagined’ structure, which both creates distress and makes people hold onto life in the transnational social space because “understanding the reality of family life among international migrants requires a transnational

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imaginary; this is, after all, the way migrants define their own families and the significant relationships in their lives” (Dreby & Adkins, 2012, p.170). In the last decade, there has been a growing interest in understanding the role of mediated communication in transnational migrant families (Madianou & Miller, 2012; Baldassar et al., 2016). According to Madianou and Miller (2012), the cost of an individual communication medium is not the main focus in its use, as every medium exists in collaboration with other media. Their theory of polymedia also suggests that the various mediated communication tools are used to support different emotional interactions. The relationship between individuals, the cultural context, the power dynamics within the structural context, and the level of intimacy that users want to construct within the mediated communication are significant indicators. The primary reason for being connected with each other as parents and children is to maintain emotional intimacy and to protect the idea of being a family, and these are constructed in the transnational field through the communication tools chosen. In the age of new and varied communication tools, including many visual options, geographical distances become more tolerable thanks to the perception of being connected at any time. This allows immigrants and their children to take part in each other’s lives, no matter how far they are from each other. Nowadays new mediated communication tools intensify the communication between immigrants and their non-immigrant counterparts in the home country and help them stay connected. In other words, being connected via the internet at any time, anywhere becomes a norm for separated immigrant families after a while. For both sides, the communication technologies seem to be supporting this new transnational family life that has been established. They allow people to maintain emotional relations, to cope with feelings of longing, to satisfy mutual curiosity about the left-behind homeland and the new country, and to be able to feel the presence of each other. However, a question should be raised about the quality of these ties, established via ICTs. The shortcomings of instant communication technologies should not be ignored while celebrating their benefits. I argue that the visual component in these technologies allows a different type of intimacy to be shared by migrants and their families. The action of turning on a webcam or connecting the household in the home country to the host country via smartphone helps people take part in the lives of their loved ones living far away. Nevertheless, I argue that the efforts of transnational family members to stay in contact through virtual communications trap the individuals in imagined families, where a transnational social space is created for the reproduction of gender roles and beliefs, and the concept of traditional families. The experiences of couples who were separated before the explosion of advanced ICTs are not the same as the experiences of couples who parted after the internet and smartphones became common. The former experienced significant difficulty in communicating with each other. Moreover, the advances in ICTs did not bring about a radical improvement in their relationships because they had already consolidated relationships in which they did not feel it was crucial to stay closely connected. Developments in ICTs gained importance for the children of the first immigrants in terms of keeping in touch with their emigrant fathers. However, now that the more recent migrants have young children too, a study that looks into the

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importance of ICTs for these children could enhance the understanding of this delicate topic. According to their mothers who speak on the children’s behalf, their fathers can be reached thanks to smartphones, but still their physical absence is not acceptable for most children. The values on parenthood regarding gender roles and the reproduction of them repeat themselves in the migrants’ discourses more powerfully because of the physical separation. These gives us clues to understand how the gendered parenthood, as a conceptual abstraction, appears in concrete relationships, how it is produced and reproduced in the transnational social field.

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Esra Demirkol Colosio is a lecturer at the Çankırı Karatekin University, Sociology Department. She graduated with a degree in Sociology (BA) (METU) in 2009 and Social Anthropology (MSc) (METU) in 2011. She received her PhD from the University of Sussex, Sociology Department in 2020. Her PhD was on transnational familyhood constructed by Turkish immigrants in Japan and their stayed-behind families in Turkey. She worked as an assistant/interviewer in fieldworks of several projects during her studies and volunteered with various charities both in Turkey and the UK.

Correction to: Parenting, Mental Health and Transgender Youth: Practices and Perspectives in India Doyel Ghosh and Prasanta Kumar Roy

Correction to: Chapter 25 in: H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_25 The first author name in the references was cited incorrectly. This has now been corrected. The correct reference is given here: ‘Green, A., & Charles, K. (2019). Voicing the victims of narcissistic partners: A qualitative analysis of responses to narcissistic injury and self-esteem regulation. SAGE Open, 9(2), 2158244019846693’

The updated original version of this chapter can be found at https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_25 © The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2022 H. Selin (ed.), Parenting Across Cultures, Science Across Cultures: The History of Non-Western Science 12, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-031-15359-4_30

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