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W O M E N AFTER COLLEGE
WOMEN AFTER COLLEGE Λ Study of the Effectiveness Of Jheir
Education
BY ROBERT G. FOSTER AND
PAULINE PARK WILSON
P U B L I S H E D FOR THE BY
MERRILL-PALMER
C O L U M B I A
SCHOOL
UNIVERSITY
N E W YORK :
1942
PRESS
COPYRIGHT
1942
COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY PRESS, NEW YORK Humphrey Milford, Amen House, London, E.C. 4, England, AND B. I. Building, Nicol Road, Bombay, India
FOREIGN AGENTS: O X F O R D UNIVERSITY PRESS,
MANUFACTURED IN T H E UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
FOREWORD
for college women was set up by the Merrill-Palmer School in the fall of 1932 with two major objectives in mind: first, to explore the needs and types of problem facing college graduates and to determine, if possible, what contributions the college experience had made to their solution; second, to experiment with the development of an adult guidance service for families of a middle socioeconomic status and an educational background approximately equivalent to graduation from college, university, normal, or professional school. Our experience in pioneering in the field of child development had made us aware of the necessity of limiting the scope of a new experiment as well as the advantage of beginning with a group that would make maximum demands on staff training and experience. Naturally, a wide range of problems of personal, family, and financial nature was disclosed, and the relationship of the previous training to these was studied. The service offered was not set up to deal with any one problem area, such as child guidance or marital adjustment, and in consequence drew to it women having many and varied needs. Many college women, learning of the study, volunteered to cooperate quite irrespective of any service offered or available. From these two sources of college women, that is, those who came seeking help and those who volunteered their I ADVISORY SERVICE
vi
FOREWORD
services, plans were developed for collecting a volume of case histories which might indicate specifically what kinds of difficulty college women have after leaving college. Intensive case history material of this kind seemed to have the possibility of yielding information with a reasonably high degree of reliability and validity. There was evidence that such an accumulation of material should yield fairly concrete data as to how far education had contributed or could contribute to their preparation for and orientation to life. It appeared that the findings of such a study could be of real value to educators and institutions responsible for the education of women. The present report, therefore, attempts to set forth, as a result of its analysis of the life histories of college graduates, material which purports to show both the wide range and complexity of problems confronting women in the course of their development and some points at which the problem of education for women needs to be analyzed more carefully. The manuscript is offered not as an answer to the problem of what should be included in a program of education for women but to provoke discussion and stimulate analysis of present offerings in the hope that more effective plans may be evolved. The authors wish to express their appreciation to the women who gave freely of their time and experience while they cooperated in this research, and also their gratitude to the entire staff of the Merrill-Palmer School and especially the Advisory Service Committee for their counsel and helpful suggestions throughout the entire course of the investigation; to Lawrence K. Frank and Robert J. Havighurst for their help in planning and guiding the study and critical reading of the manuscript; to Malcolm S. MacLean and Judith Clark Moncure, especially, for their
FOREWORD
vii
suggestions in connection with the final revision of this manuscript; and to Miss Dorothy Tyler of the MerrillPalmer School for her editorial assistance. EDNA N . W H I T E
Detroit, Michigan June, 1942
CONTENTS
Foreword by Edna N. White I. Introduction II. III.
3
Everyday Problems of Women
26
Women's Needs and the College Curriculum
92
IV. Education and Women's Needs V. Women's Education Found Wanting VI.
ν
Changing Education for Women
119 186 221
Appendices A. Studies Related to This Investigation
273
B. College Women and Community Service
276
Index
297
CHARTS
I. Composition and Characteristics of the Group of One Hundred College Women
2
II. Vocational Experience of Group of One Hundred College Women
10
1 III. Percentage of Seventy-Eight Married Women with Different Kinds of Problem in the Precollege, College, College-to-Present, and Present Periods of Their Lives 27 IV. Percentage of Twenty-Two Single Women with Different Kinds of Problem in the Precollege, College, College-to-Present, and Present Periods of Their Lives 29 V. Direction of Men's Education
112
VI. Direction of Women's Education as It Is for Most Individuals 114 WII.
Direction of Women's Education Realistically Conceived 117 TABLES
I. II.
Colleges Attended by the One Hundred Women Interval Ranking of the Women's Scores on Detroit Advanced Intelligence Test
8 11
WOMEN AFTER COLLEGE
i
υ
Chapter
One
INTRODUCTION
the twentieth century has seen a wide extension of the educational and vocational opportunities open to women and steadily increasing participation and achievement by women, in many areas of human endeavor, little has been done actually to understand and rationalize women's basic needs and problems or their role in American culture. Nor has much been accomplished in building an educational program which would adequately prepare them for the part they play as women. What are the important situations that every woman is called upon to meet? How does she meet them? Is she prepared to meet the vocational, economic, and civic problems confronting her? Does she find satisfaction and show resourcefulness in the conduct of her social, cultural, and recreational life and that of her family? Does she maintain sound health, physical and mental? Does she understand herself as a person and as a woman? Is she adequately carrying her role in life, whether she is married or single? To what extent has her education been helpful to her? These are some of the questions raised in relation to a group of women graduates of American colleges in the present report of the results of an intensive study of one hundred women who are actually meeting the exigencies of life after graduation from college. HOUGH
4
INTRODUCTION
The report is addressed especially to educators responsible for the higher education of women, in the belief that they are concerned with and will be interested in the present difficulties faced by college women in their personal and social life and in the extent to which the women studied believed that their education had prepared them to meet such difficulties. Later chapters are devoted to some of the larger questions of the purpose and scope and effectiveness of women's education in America, in the light of the findings in these cases. These questions are raised in order to relate the results of the study more immediately and practically with the issues that seem to be emerging in women's education, in view of the larger responsibilities which women must inevitably carry in American society and for which educational programs must in the future make more deliberate provision. THE SERVICE BASIS OF THE
STUDY
Research with regard to people seems more fruitful when based upon service rendered to the individuals studied. Therefore, the college women who made this study possible by their cooperation in supplying data were in return offered consultation service. The preparations for research entailed the establishment, at the Merrill-Palmer School in 1932, of the Advisory Service for College Women and the introduction of this service and the study to prospective clients. Several methods of making the service known to potential clients and professional groups were followed. Announcements were sent out; groups of professional people were invited in to discuss the new project; contacts were made with parents of children in the Merrill-Palmer
INTRODUCTION
5
Nursery School and with alumnae of the school; and talks were delivered to college alumnae and organized college clubs in Detroit. The last method proved to be one of the most valuable, for these college groups were one of the earliest and most consistent sources of clientele. The clients of the service themselves ultimately became an important source of intake through their recommendations to friends and members of their social groups. ORGANIZATION
OF THE
STUDY
Complete case histories are the source of the data for the major research study undertaken in connection with the Advisory Service and reported in this book. After a number of exploratory studies and preliminary approaches, it was the opinion of the investigators that, costly and timeconsuming as the case history may be and difficult and laborious as it is to analyze the data so gathered, no method yet devised seems to offer a better means of gaining a rounded picture of a total life pattern. To serve as a framework within which the case histories might be fitted, a diagram representing the total life picture of a woman from infancy through adulthood was formulated.1 On the basis of this diagram a detailed outline was set up to serve as a guide—but never as a questionnaire—for the interviewer in collecting data. Aside from a few autobiographical sketches and the objective tests used, the data for the histories were obtained entirely through interviews. During the first sessions the subject herself guided the discussion along the lines of her own needs and interests, but later the interviewer took more 1 A limited number of the diagrams and record forms used are available at cost from the Merrill-Palmer School.
β
INTRODUCTION
initiative in directing the discussion, in order to complete the history. CRITERIA
OF S E L E C T I O N OF FOR T H E STUDY
SUBJECTS
The criteria of selection of subjects for the study were the educational level attained and the date of graduation; marital status; college from which the client was graduated; and willingness to cooperate in the study. The educational requirement was that the client must hold the bachelor's degree and that this degree must have been granted after 1920, for the study sought to discover how well modern education is meeting the needs of women, and many of the major changes in college curricula have been made since 1920. Two among the one hundred women had been graduated before 1920, but both had continued their education in some way after graduation. The requirement with respect to marital status was based on the general Detroit trend shown in the 1930 census, which indicates that 78 to 80 percent of women in the city marry. An approximation of this ratio was used in the study: 76 percent of the subjects were married, 22 percent single, and 2 percent divorced. In such a study, in which the interest is in college women in general, the matter of selecting a clientele representing a wide range of colleges 1 becomes important. Representation of both large and small institutions, distributed in the East, South, West, and Midwest, was sought. A ratio of 25 percent graduates of women's colleges to 75 percent graduates of coeducational colleges was set somewhat arbitrarily, in order to have a sufficiently large sample of gradu1 Throughout this study, the word "college," for convenience, is used for all the institutions of higher education attended by the women, whether officially college, university, or other institution.
INTRODUCTION
7
ates of women's colleges and as a compromise between the situation in Detroit, where about 94 percent of the college population are graduates of coeducational institutions, and that in an Eastern city, which would unquestionably reveal an entirely different picture. The ratio actually achieved was 76 percent graduates of coeducational colleges and 24 percent of women's colleges. The final criterion was willingness to cooperate in such a study. When a client was found to meet all other criteria, the staff explained to her the purpose of the study, the intimate nature and quantity of the information needed, and the amount of time required to give it, as well as the mutual cooperation and voluntary participation demanded by the study. She was assured that all data would be treated anonymously and that she would be at liberty to withdraw at any stage of the study. Though some clients of the service who met all the requirements and were asked to cooperate in the study did not comply and one woman withdrew after two interviews, only one complete history was withdrawn. COMPOSITION
OF T H E
GROUP
In two respects the one hundred women were alike : all lived in a large metropolitan area—that of Detroit—and all were college graduates. In other respects they displayed such differences and similarities as would be expected. The essential personal, educational, and test data are shown in Chart 1. The many colleges and universities represented are shown in Table 1. In birthplace, the women represented all sections of the country, but more than three fourths came from the Middle West. More than half came from cities having a population of 50,000 or more. About three fourths were of native-born
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INTRODUCTION
9
parentage and of Protestant faith. The group were chiefly in their early thirties, with an age range from twenty to fifty. Some were still single, but most were married and in the beginning of the childbearing and child-rearing period of life. The economic status of the group was relatively high, the family income ranging from $1,200 to $50,000 and the median being $2,810 for the coeducational college graduates and $3,800 for the women's college graduates. Both in their parental families and in their own, the graduates of women's colleges tended toward a higher income level. Both groups tended to marry into the economic group to which they belonged before attending college—the coeducational group to marry men in educational and professional fields and the women's college graduates to marry noncollege men in business. The two groups differed vocationally as well. As Chart 2 shows, the coeducational college group had more vocational experience before, during, and after attending college. The women were superior mentally, as shown by their scores on the Detroit Advanced Intelligence Test (Table 2). Sixty percent of the group had better than average adjustment, according to the Thurstone Personality Schedule; 86 individuals had scores indicating average or better than average adjustment, while 14 had scores indicating poor adjustment. The Bernreuter Personality Inventory ratings show that 91 percent had better than average emotional balance and tended to be independent and unlikely to seek advice often, and a majority tended to be extroverted and dominant in their dealings with others. The personality traits of the subjects revealed during interviews agree fairly well with the results of the Bernreuter Schedule.
CHART
II
VOCATIONAL E X P E R I E N C E O F GROUP O F O N E HUNDRED COLLEGE WOMEN
College
[IN
PERCENT]
College
College
11
I N T R O D U C T I O N TABLE
II
INTERVAL RANKING OF THE W O M E N S SCORES ON DETROIT ADVANCED INTELLIGENCE TEST INTERVAL
WOMENS
COEDUCATIONAL
WOMENS AND COEDUCA-
COLLECE
COLLEGE
TIONAL COLLEGE
CRADUATES
CRADUATES
Number
220-240 200-219 180-199 160-179 140-159® 120-139 100-119 80- 99 TOTAL
..
2 5 9 7
., 23
GRADUATES
Number
Number
Percent
3 4 9 14 19 18 2 1 70
3 β 14 23 26 18 2 1 93
3 6 15 25 28 20 2 1 100
MEAN: 1 6 2 STANDARD DEVIATION: 2 8 » Mid-point of 140-159 interval is 75tb percentile for college women in general.
In the Vernon-Allport Values, ratings are grouped about the average, with none showing marked significance. VALIDITY
OF
THE
STUDY
From among the first 330 women who came to the service, 80 percent of the research group were selected. Selection was made without regard to the problem presented, since the study was planned to discover, not to select, the problems of college women. The remaining 20 percent were recruited from a random sampling of every fiftieth card taken from a compilation of the names of 6,000 college women; it was hoped that this sampling would supply a
12
INTRODUCTION
control group. However, only twenty of those contacted were sufficiently interested to give their complete histories and most of their records were not as full as those of the women who offered their cooperation without solicitation. Moreover, the service realized that such selective factors as conscientiousness and recognizing an opportunity for help with their problems operated fully as much with these women as with the original group and that accordingly they could not be considered a legitimate control group. At the outset the project was subjected to criticism on the ground that the women selected for study must inevitably be a problem group, since they were selected from a service clientele, and that even the offer of those who ostensibly came primarily to cooperate was open to suspicion, since such an offer might be a "cover-up" for an unstated problem. This criticism was doubtless valid in certain cases, but for several reasons the investigators are convinced that the subjects cannot justifiably be described as a problem group. In our opinion a request for routine services of the school, such as registration of a child for the Nursery School or intelligence testing, is more likely to indicate an intelligent mother attempting to utilize the best educational advantages available for her children than a woman seeking an excuse to get help with her own problems. Many of the women demonstrated by their remarks and attitudes that they would not have gone to a service set up expressly to deal with personal problems. Again, many were genuinely interested in education and were grateful for an opportunity to participate in an educational project and to be in touch with an educational institution. For some women the experience satisfied a social need, in addition to any service that might be given them. The
INTRODUCTION
13
newcomer to the city found it a means of social contact and of making new acquaintances, and women who were unable to spend anything on recreation during the worst of the depression years welcomed the interviews as a social experience for which they made a return in contributing their histories. It should be pointed out, however, that the single women included in the study are not as representative of single women college graduates in general as the married ones are of their group; the married ones, though superior in intelligence and socioeconomic status, seem to be really representative of married college women in general. Though the Advisory Service had among its clients single women from many professional and business fields, there is no broad representation of these fields among the women who cooperated in the study. This lack can be explained satisfactorily by the time factor alone. Such women usually lead lives so active vocationally, socially, and personally that they cannot spare the hours necessary for such a study. No doubt, also, single women were not on the whole as attracted as married women to the kind of service available in return for their cooperation. During the course of the study six of the single women married, but since most of their material was completed before their marriage they were considered as single for the purposes of the study. Since the completion of the study several more have married. RELIABILITY
OF THE
HISTORIES
As here used, the case history method was like photographing the client from many angles, at as many stages of development as possible, in her cultural setting, and then overlapping the pictures. Each step of the outline served
14
INTRODUCTION
as a different angle from which to take the pictures. For example, in one set of interviews the history of the woman's recreational life and interests was taken; in another, her religious development; in still another, her educational experience. The overlapping within interviews added to the consistency of the data, for in history-taking the subject's variations of mood and physical condition, among other factors, and the immediate effect of the environment could cause her to present a different picture of herself at one time than another. It is scarcely possible, however, for a person continuously to give a false impression of herself when she must discuss the same aspect of her life from many different angles. The interviews for these one hundred histories were spread over one to three years of time. The reliability of the case history depends to a marked degree upon the effectiveness and accuracy of the interviewer. Ability in establishing rapport; thoroughness in covering the outline; skill in pursuing suggested leads into more intimate areas than are indicated in the outline, in recording all pertinent information, and in observation itself; and ability to recognize the interrelatedness of material—all vary markedly from one interviewer to another. There were pronounced individual differences in these respects among the six regular and four part-time interviewers who contributed to this study. Two other factors affected the nature of the material gathered. First, some of the interviewers were collecting data without giving service, and in these instances both the approach of the interviewer and the response of the subject showed results divergent from those in which the interviewer gave service, as well, to the client. Complete information was gathered, it is true, by the research interviewer, but the anxieties, aspirations, and underlying feel-
INTRODUCTION
15
ings of the woman were not always brought to light. Second, the age and marital status of the interviewer sometimes affected the results, for while many women gave their histories freely regardless of these points, once rapport had been established, others, as later interviews with the staff showed, felt that they could not reveal certain aspects of their Uves to an unmarried interviewer. The somewhat extended period of time over which the interviews took place was also of value, for women who came to know the interviewer well and with whom progressively better rapport was established sometimes gave information that they could not possibly have revealed earlier. In all these respects the multiple approach was a valuable safeguard against errors in the case histories. ANALYSIS
OF T H E CASE
HISTORIES
The completed histories vary greatly in length—from 4,800 to 205,600 words, with a median of 66,650 words. This variation was due largely to differences in the fluency of the subjects in giving their histories, which, in turn, depended upon such factors as garrulity or reticence in discussing personal experience and probably upon the meagerness or richness of the experience itself. The number of interviews and the number of hours per interview also varied considerably. The interviews ranged from a minimum of thirty minutes to a maximum of six hours, but averaged two hours in length, which proved to be the ideal period. The length of time was determined by the preference of the client. The case material collected over a period of six months tended to have a fluency and continuity that were sometimes lacking when the data were taken over a more ex-
16
INTRODUCTION
tended time. However, the longer intervals perhaps added somewhat to the reliability of the material, since it would have been virtually impossible for the client to recall what she had discussed in the preceding interview. Once the life histories were recorded, the next step was to analyze them in such a way as to learn how college training had prepared these women to carry on their lives, meeting daily problems and major and minor crises. The first step, accordingly, was to select several cases at random and to read them with the purpose of finding some method by which the problem situations could be extracted and placed in a framework that would not only demonstrate the range of problems met but also maintain the interrelatedness and continuity of the material. A problem was considered to be any situation sufficiently perplexing to cause anxiety, in whatever degree, before a solution of some kind could be effected. The amount of anxiety shown and the difficulty involved in solving the problem determined its seriousness. As the cases were read, every situation that in the judgment of the several investigators offered a problem was labeled as such. One of the greatest difficulties in evaluating a problem analysis of this kind lies in the lack of any adequate method by which the relative importance of problem situations can be weighed. To measure problems arising from bereavement, school failures, being snubbed socially by friends, sex relationships, the breaking of an engagement, or prolonged illness in the family—all problems met in the study —on some kind of scale showing the relative importance of each particular type of problem in the life of the subject, as compared with other types, is an almost impossible undertaking. It might be possible to study all the problem situations in an individual case and determine which had
INTRODUCTION
17
been most important in this particular life; but any attempt to weigh all problems for the entire group—from such simple ones as fear of reciting in class to such serious ones as a breakdown in health or the loss of a child—or to evaluate all the problems in one area, such as money, relations with associates, or sex, would be not only next to impossible but also questionable from a methodological point of view. To illustrate, bereavement is met very differently by different persons. There may be acceptance and quick readjustment or, conversely, lack of acceptance and complete breakdown, withdrawal from life into illness, or suicide. In this study, therefore, no attempt was made to weigh problems or to rank them in order of seriousness or difficulty. A series of twenty-one classifications was finally developed for the problems encountered by the one hundred women. These were as follows: attitude toward self; status; attitudes toward situations; attitudes toward possessions; attitudes toward husband; relationship with husband; relationship with children; relationship with parents and relatives; relationship with in-laws; relationship with associates; sex relations; health of self; health of family; religion; education; vocation; finances; housekeeping; community participation; recreation; and crises. These classifications may best be defined by illustrative excerpts from the cases as they were recorded in the various categories. Attitude toward self: Any statement made by the client which revealed conflicts, inadequacies, difficult adjustments, or the like, recognized by herself. "Even in the week's visit in the city I had a definite feeling of inferiority or being the country cousin." Status: Problems of the client growing out of her relations with people. "I had a great deal of difficulty in adjusting myself to marriage. I ascribe this to my back-
18
INTRODUCTION
ground's being so different from my husband's. His attitude towards women is different from what I expected a husband to have. He wants a wife 'to be a housekeeper, bring up children, and always be there.' He forgets to dance with me when he takes me out. I think I should have had some idea of his attitude before my marriage, and I do not know why I did not realize it." Attitude toward situations: Problems resulting from attitudes toward specific situations. When asked if she had any fear of marriage, a client replied: "In college I had the idea that marriage must be very boring, that after you gave up the excitement of being with a great many men, undoubtedly you must be greatly bored. I gave up this idea when I fell in love with my husband, but I did question very seriously whether I should like the idea of stopping being myself, which seemed to me to be necessary in marriage." Attitudes toward possessions: "Things mean nothing to me. I just never want to acquire any more than the bare necessities for my home. This attitude disturbs my family sometimes." Attitudes toward husband: Anything the client regarded as a problem in her husband. "My husband is quite moody. Many times he will go through meals or for days without saying a word." Relationship with husband: Any problem involving conflict between the client and her husband. "We have many arguments over the height the window should be raised. I like to have it up higher than my husband does, and at certain times of the year this difference between us causes much annoyance." Relationship with children: Any problem the client had with her children. "I think N. is very sociable, but at present
INTRODUCTION
19
she is beginning to feel her strength and defies us whenever she is so inclined." Relationship with parents and relatives: Any problem involving conflict with the client's relatives, other than her immediate family. "My mother still likes to tell my sister and me exactly what we must do, what clothes to wear, what engagements to make, what places to go and the way to go, but as soon as we are out of her sight she apparently dismisses this responsibility and lets us go our respective ways." Relationship with in-laws: Problems involving conflict of the client with her husband's family and conflict between the husband and her family. "I shall always feel a certain antagonism towards my husband's brother, because we could not agree over his unfair treatment of my husband." Relationship with associates: Any problem involving the client's relations with persons other than her own family and other relatives. "The only time I ever had the feeling that people might be working against me came during the last part of my junior year in college. A girl's name was brought up to be voted upon for admission to the chapter, and since I had known her in another chapter I was very much against her admission. . . . There was another girl in the chapter who worked against me in this particular matter and carried the weight of the group's opinion away from me. She came back the following year and took all the places I had earned. . . . When I lost the honor which by rights should have been mine, I turned my interest to working for money to take the place of working for hon» ors. Sex relationships: Any problems involving the sex development, sex attitudes, or physical sex adjustment of the client. "I cannot do what was advised, as I find that the
20
INTRODUCTION
more I attempt to increase our marital relations the more repulsive they become to me. On a few occasions they have been fairly satisfactory, but on the whole I struggle too hard to carry out this advice, and I believe that when sex relations are so distasteful to me I cannot help but show it to my husband." Health: Any problem of the client's health. "As to what the college could have done to offer more help to students, in my college the students were too free from the point of view of health. They did not check on students, and I am sure they did not know I spent most of my time in bed. I feel that the diet was not adequate, as no dietitian planned the food. There were two very overworked doctors who could barely look after the girls who had emergency illnesses." Health of family: Any problem concerning the health of the client's immediate family or relatives. "When C. was about four months old, we started in with a long siege of illnesses. Measles dragged out through the entire family. There were abscessed ears for all, including me, and a double mastoid operation for C., with a final windup of chicken pox for all the children." Religion: Any conflict arising out of the client's attitude towards or activities in religion or out of her religious philosophy. "As far as my children are concerned, I do not want them brought up with a background of the old traditional stories. However, I should like to find a Sunday school, for I think this is one experience all children should have, and I would send them if the Sunday schools in my neighborhood were not too traditional." Education: Any problem of the client in relation to formal schooling. "In college I had a course in hygiene which was very inadequate. It dealt mostly with the matter of
INTRODUCTION
21
venereal disease, and so simply built up more antagonism against men and more fears than the girls already had, and helped to further a feeling of hate towards men. It seems to me that this matter of teaching sex through fears and inhibitions has been a very destructive factor in my marriage relationships." Vocation: Problems arising from the adjustments which the client made to her job or work. "After graduation I took a position in a high school teaching Latin, French, and library work. I disliked it all thoroughly and was a complete failure, and was asked to leave at the end of the year. This nearly broke me, and I tried to rationalize everything about the circumstances. I felt that I needed better preparation for teaching, so I attended summer school and then borrowed the money and went abroad for a year, taking the regular course given for foreigners." Finances: Any problems involving the client's finances. "I had found it almost impossible to get my husband down to an examination of our finances until, with the added impetus of my visit here, I was able really to bring the matter up for definite consideration. We went through our bills and expenditures of the past six months and estimated the amounts of money we were spending. We were both shocked when we realized that what we were spending . . . exceeded our income." Housekeeping: Problems of the client in homemaking skills and activities. "I have had a perfectly tremendous problem in home management. I was never particularly interested in domestic activities as a young person and there was no need for me to assume any responsibility at home. At college it was the same. Owing to my husband's small income and later his unemployment, it was necessary for me to continue work after marriage, and so housekeeping
22
INTRODUCTION
entered little into my scheme of existence. It was only after the arrival of my first baby that I began housekeeping. It descended upon me in a heap. While the average housewife learns gradually to work out a schedule for herself, and has it well established before there are children, I had everything precipitated upon me at once. . . . Nothing ever seemed to work out right for me. I had no skills for handling a house easily; I knew nothing about cooking or meal planning, though I enjoyed this part of the work most of all; and the baby was new to me and all the things entailed in caring for an infant were extremely awkward and distasteful to me. These difficulties have continued right straight along, though I now have things worked out to better advantage. . . ." Community participation: Problems arising from the client's relationship to and participation in community organizations. "I am interested in working for the advancement of peace, but I ought to be doing something about it now and I am terribly worried about it. I really don't know what I am supposed to do. Since my cousin is one of the leading people, I have been chosen to organize a branch of a peace movement in my community. I know I have to go ahead with it, but I dread doing anything about it." Recreation: Problems relating to the client's social and recreational life. "My husband does not care to dance and will not put forth the effort to dance. I also enjoy playing tennis, and he used to play tennis but says that he is too old now. I think the solution to our problem would be to find more things we can do together. I feel that ideally husbands and wives should have many activities in common, but our common activities are rather few." Crises: Problems arising from crises or definite turning points in the life of the client. "I always felt very secure in
INTRODUCTION
23
my relationship to Father, and it was with a great shock that I received the information from him that M. was his favorite daughter. We were seated at the dinner table one evening while I was in college when Father made this remark. Mother reproved him for having said such a thing in front of me. Until that time I had never felt myself to be in competition with my sister." With this classification of problems in mind, the case histories were read and problem situations were bracketed, each being marked with a number representing the classification to which the problem belonged. Thus, the excerpt "I had quite a scene with the maid this morning because she failed to carry through a very special order about M/s toilet training. We are on friendly terms now but I do hate to scold either of the girls and always feel badly about it afterward," would be marked for three types—relationship with associates, relationship with children, and attitude toward self. Some were recorded under as many as eight or ten types. Three investigators were responsible for reading and classifying the data, after the preliminary work of defining types, establishing methods for the cross recording of interrelated problems, resolving disagreements over classification, and developing a uniform technique among the investigators was completed. The fact that problems occurred at different developmental levels made it advisable further to classify the problem situations in the following six major divisions : Section I: Problems presented to the service or reasons stated by the women for contacting the service. Section II: Problems appearing in the initial interview. Section III: Problems of the present, from the time the client first came to the service until she completed her in-
24
INTRODUCTION
terviews. (This section included much of Sections I and II.) Section IV: Problems of the past, including ( a ) problems occurring in early childhood and prior to attending college; ( b ) problems occurring during the college period; and ( c ) problems occurring after attending college and up to the time of the study. Section V: Problems which the investigators themselves regarded as presenting the major difficulties of the client. Section VI: Solutions, that is, attempts of the women to help themselves, and services given by the counselors with the same purpose. Only Section III, problems of the present, and Section IV, problems of the past, are considered in this report. The remaining sections will provide material for other studies. The first analysis or breakdown of the material was completed by copying the problem excerpts, as marked in the histories. These excerpts were then reduced to single statements. Thus a long paragraph might be simplified to, "Expresses desire for religious philosophy." This condensation provided a key by which the great mass of data could be evaluated and interpreted, either longitudinally or crosssectionally, for the individual or the group. During the long and arduous task of bringing the data to this point, the investigators saw certain trends demonstrated, the evolution of some theoretical concepts and the refutation of others, indications for more extensive or more precise investigation, and certain implications for women's education. In the following chapters the findings are offered in such a way as: ( 1 ) to present an overview of the problems of this group of one hundred college women; ( 2 ) to scrutinize the various types of problems and their relative degrees of importance; ( 3 ) to consider individual
INTRODUCTION
25
constellations of problems; ( 4 ) to discuss the concepts, generalizations, and conclusions in the light of the data; and ( 5 ) to show the implications of the study for the education of women.
Chapter EVERYDAY
Two
P R O B L E M S
OF
W O M E N
specific life problems are considered without due regard for their relation to other problems and to the personality and character of the person presenting them. While the fifteen problem areas discussed in this chapter indicate the actual difficulties met by the one hundred women in various common life situations, their significance, as the case histories presented in Chapter III demonstrate, lies equally in their functional relation to the basic personalities of the individual women concerned and in their interrelation in the individual life. However, though it is true that many of the problems presented, and certainly the ways in which new and unexpected situations are met, are a reflection of the particular personality make-up and deeper emotional needs of the individual woman, many others are created by the circumstances of her life and do not originate in the woman herself. The distribution of problems and the percentage of cases in which they appeared are shown in Chart 3 for married women and Chart 4 for single women, classified according to the time when the problems presented themselves. From these tabulations several conclusions may be drawn: ( 1 ) . The woman who has no problems probably does not exist. All women apparently have difficulty in meeting OO OFTEN,
CHAHT
III
PERCENTAGE OF SEVENTY-EIGHT MARRIED WOMEN WITH DIFFERENT KINDS OF PROBLEM IN THE PRECOLLEGE, COLLEGE, COLLEGE-TO-PRESENT, AND PRESENT PERIODS OF THEIR LIVES TYPE OF PROBLEM Personality Financial
PERCENTAGE OF C A S E S 100 92 94 97 92 74
62
Health Husband-wife
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WBm
67 V / / / / / , • / ,
IF
Relations with associates Recreational Housekeeping Relations with relatives Parent-child Crisis In-law
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Sex Religion Vocation Education
I
Present
College-to-Present College Precollege
28
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
the normal life situations which confront them in the course of their development. (2). Situations which are difficult to meet in the precollege period, especially those concerning personality and human relations, tend to remain the source of problems in later years. ( 3 ). In this group there are more problems after graduation from college than at any time before, in both range and frequency. One reason may be that there is greater ease of recall for more recent occurrences, and that the women therefore had recent problems more clearly in mind, while earlier ones had receded. Another may be that married women, who were in the majority, have to meet many new situations and have a wider range of problems than single women. Again, as new problems are met in life not all of the old ones have been resolved, so the cumulative effect is evident. Though hundreds of specific problems were tabulated in the fifteen major divisions, space limitations make it impracticable to discuss more than the three problems occurring most frequently in each division. PERSONALITY
PROBLEMS
Shyness, sensitivity, and tension were the most usual difficulties related to personality. Both what a person does and how he feels about it are important in understanding his total personality. Elements of the personality are revealed by participation or failure to participate in every life experience. Whether the area of activity concerns money, religion, sex, vocation, or the management of children, the characteristic and basic behavior patterns are revealed in subtle and unconscious ways. Along with each act or contemplated act go certain
CHART
IV
PERCENTAGE OF TWENTY-TWO SINGLE W O M E N WITH DIFFERENT KINDS OF PROBLEM IN THE PRECOLLEGE, COLLEGE, COLLEGE-TO-PRESENT, AND PRESENT PERIODS OF THEIR LIVES
T Y P E OF P R O B L E M Personality
Relations with associates
PERCENTAGE OF CASES
100 91 95 95 100 86
91 73
Health
Financial
Vocation
95 68
'Π 68
m m
/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / Ζ
Ί ··· : · ΝΝ
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UBMMHHMMft y / / . y y y y y / y / y y y y ,
50 ΊΝΧΝ '1 :·'· Λ' '/'·• ' •· • I Recreational
86 41
64 55
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Relations with relatives
Crisis
Sex
Religio
Education
Present College-to-Present College Precollege
30
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
feelings and attitudes which others never see and seldom know about. It is with these inner feelings that we are concerned in this section. It may at first seem strange that shyness was the outstanding personality problem of these mature women, who ranked above the average for college women in selfsufficiency and dominance, according to the personality tests given. But when shyness is understood as symptomatic behavior, relative to the person having the experience, it can be seen as an expression of inadequacy rather than a static and descriptive characteristic. It was because of their intelligence and self-sufficiency, not in spite of it, that these women suffered from shyness, for it was the discrepancy between their shyness and their usual competence that caused difficulty. It was significant how often shyness caused fear among these women and fear caused shyness. Fear of an anticipated situation of a kind in which shyness was always experienced resulted in continual withdrawal or avoidance or in exaggerated compensatory behavior of an aggressive nature. One woman recalled from her childhood the terrifying experience of her first public appearance, when she forgot what she had to say after becoming aware of the sea of strange faces before her. For years she retained this paralyzing reaction whenever she appeared before a group. Shyness sometimes results from a fear of not being as important in some situations as in others. The woman who is in complete command of her home and family often avoids any situation that she is unable to dominate. Some women find their only real security in domination. Shyness often was the result of failure to measure up to expectations, whether their own or others'. Mrs. Newman 1 1 The names used in case histories and illustrative excerpts are fictitious throughout the book.
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
31
provides an example. Before attending college she had always considered herself quite competent in most situations and was aware that she impressed others as being so. However, college courses proved to be very difficult for her, and the accompanying feeling of inadequacy was not easy to accept. Shyly she sought help from her instructors, only to be told bluntly, "You do not need help. Anyone could tell by looking at you that you can get along all right. I give time only to the girls who cannot get along." She met a similar response several times, and was left feeling extremely insecure. She became shy with her instructors and compensated for her feeling by assuming increasingly a manner of marked poise. "They would not let me admit that I did not know what to do," she said, "and as a result I tried more and more to cover up the great inadequacy I felt." A lack of social skills made many women shy. "I never know whether to introduce the man or the woman first, and so I try to avoid introducing people," and "I get so embarrassed because I never can remember anyone's name," were expressions used. Often early conditioning left a feeling of shyness even after the skills had been acquired. Thus, many women expressed a dislike of teas, but when they were questioned it became evident that they really enjoyed these social affairs, "when," as one of them said, "I once get started talking. But I am afraid it will be as it was in college, when I never knew what to say." The most articulate women made such comments, showing that they had carried over a reaction from a time when they were awkward socially. For such situations, in which shyness results from insecurity and inadequacy, there seems to be plenty of evidence pointing to early family, school, and social experi-
32
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
enees as causal factors. In general, women who meet with a wide variety of social experiences while growing up seem more secure and achieve greater satisfaction from entertaining, visiting, teas, women's meetings, and similar affairs, and experience less shyness and frustration in connection with them, than women without such experience. Shyness and insecurity were expressed in other ways, or projected on others, as revealed by such statements as, "My friends criticize me," "they treat me unfairly," "they do not accept me." Such expressions of personal inadequacy are well illustrated by a single woman who said, "It is strange that this is the first time in my life I have seen the relation between my feeling of unpopularity and lack of having dates and my own shyness and inadequacies. Up until now I have always felt that the world gave me a dirty deal. Now, at thirty, I really see my failures as largely the result of my own inadequacy." Degree of shyness depends also upon acceptance or rejection by the family and associates of the individual and upon the degree of status with them. He may feel inadequate to make a talk before a particular group of associates and yet feel that he is accepted by the group and has status with them. The family plays an important role in this matter. The degree to which anyone has been made to feel important in the family, as a child, through acceptance and recognition and affection, has much to do with whether he will feel adequate and secure, or otherwise, as an adult. From such acceptance or rejection in the family arise many of the characteristic ways by which the individual adapts himself to life. His estimate of himself as a shy, sensitive, tense person, or one who is adequate and poised, is more often than not an expression of early conditioning. The most frequent personality problem for these women
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
33
is closely related to social participation, which permeates experience throughout the life span. From such a result parents and educators may see the persistent and lasting effect of early experience and the need for helping children to develop a degree of competence in meeting social demands. Sensitiveness and tension were the problems ranking next to shyness in frequency. All three appeared to originate in early childhood and to persist throughout the period of development. Hurt feelings and sensitiveness were of major concern to the women, who usually spoke of themselves as being sensitive only with those they loved. "No one can hurt my feelings except my husband," was a remark often made. These women longed for and needed a basic security in their husbands and were hurt when this security was threatened in any way. A feeling of tension and strain was referred to again and again, usually in an apologetic fashion, as in the remark "I have always been scornful of anyone who had nerves, so you can imagine how I hate to admit now that I am nervous." Almost none had been aware of "nerves" until they entered college, but during college attendance and increasingly thereafter worry and anxiety seemed to make themselves felt in an unrelieved nervous tension. The causes appeared to be varied, but all seemed to reflect the general social and economic strain of metropolitan living. It is notable that a sense of insecurity underlies all three of these personality problems. In the attempt to gain security and overcome her feelings of inadequacy and inferiority and rejection, each woman develops her own peculiar kind of symptomatic behavior, which is expressed in terms of her own personality and is evident in every area of her life. The most important associated factors in determining the degree of insecurity felt appear to be the ex-
34
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
tent to which the woman is accepted or rejected, dominated or overprotected, and her amount of status or sense of importance. All these factors originate and persist in the family situation. What has happened there will not reduce the number of times that a woman will meet domination, rejection, or lack or loss of status on the job, at school, or in social situations; but it will largely determine the kind of adjustment and adaptation she will make to these experiences. Every day, parents and teachers give children techniques for meeting life situations. Some are wise and helpful; others prove to be a handicap to the child. One mother gave her son the following approach for meeting failure when his report card had one A and the rest C's and D's by saying: "Why, this is the only place you got an A. Your entire record is spoiled." Another, in a similar situation, said, "I see you got an A in arithmetic, son. That is fine. What was the trouble with your spelling this month? Were the words new, or didn't you study them carefully? Why don't you bring your spelling book home for awhile, and let us see if you can not do better." Which was the better approach? Everybody fails at something sometime during his life. It is no sin to fail. The sad part of failure lies in not facing and accepting it, finding out why, and doing something about it. A technique that can be intelligently applied to meeting a situation would relieve the attendant shyness, tension, and sensitiveness. It is evident that the women of this study acquired their inner feelings about life and themselves very early, and very early learned techniques for dealing with situations in their own peculiar way. These techniques are manifested in different ways during childhood, adolescence, and ma-
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
35
turity, but evidence of these early-formed patterns are nevertheless apparent in every phase of adult experience. Aside from crises, which force changes, there is no area of experience quite as influential as human relations in determining life patterns, and none in which there is more difficulty in adjustment. The earliest feelings of security or insecurity, response to people, and ways of adapting to all kinds of experiences are determined by the treatment received during infancy and childhood. Thus life is conditioned by human contacts and authority, and throughout the years all situations involving people are made easier and more successful, or more difficult and less successful, by the set of responses acquired in childhood. These considerations are of course not new to educators and parents. Yet in view of their importance one is astounded at the insignificant amount of time devoted to acquiring some knowledge of the human situations of life and some skill in dealing with them. Parents and teachers alike are forced to deal with human relations and personalities every hour of the day. Perhaps the relative lack of positive results in this area of education is due to inadequate research and inadequate teacher-parent training. SOCIAL
AND R E C R E A T I O N A L
NEEDS
Lack of money, difference in recreational interests of husband and wife, and lack of opportunity for participation in recreational activities were the leading causes of difficulty in the social and recreational fields. Work, sleep, and the routines of life occupy only a portion of each day's time. That people are devoting many of their leisure hours to some form of hobby, recreation, or creative or cultural activity is indicated by the growth of
36
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
all sorts of social and recreational opportunities as well as by the increase of reading materials. The women of this study were typical in their desire for greater social and recreational opportunities. If anything, they had a greater than average need for all forms of creative outlet and self-expression after they graduated from college and assumed the responsibilities of adult life, for many developed interests in the arts and other cultural activities and some belonged to the economically privileged group who have ample funds for these purposes. For the group as a whole, social, recreational, and cultural life was handicapped mainly by the three factors listed above. The first and major problem, lack of money, involves not only the actual lack but also the feeling that it is more important to allocate available funds to other needs. Since recreational activities have become commercialized and the arts of self-entertainment sadly neglected, money is more necessary for participation in such activities than it was formerly. Some contrasting evidence indicated that even when money is plentiful, social timidity and a lack of resourcefulness and appreciation handicap many. Actual participation in recreational activities does not necessarily imply satisfaction in them. Often discontent and frustration, which remain unrelieved, underlie a seeking for such outlets. There are others whose only need in recreation is relief from the monotony of the job or the home. The second problem indicates that women's recreational activities are affected by their husbands' interests and willingness to participate with them. The interests of these women are wide. They like reading, music, the fine arts, the theater, and social activities. In general, their husbands have more interest in active sports, such as hunting, fish-
EVERYDAY PROBLEMS
37
ing, and golf. The majority of the group, however, share some interests with their husbands. In some cases there is a conflict of interests and dissatisfaction with the situation, and in others a carrying on of separate interests, with satisfaction to both husband and wife. From this study it appears that the woman who has only her own needs to satisfy may have as many difficulties in finding satisfying recreational activities within her means as the married woman, who may be limited not only by lack of money but also by a husband with different interests. Again, both may live in a section where the recreational opportunities of the city are not readily accessible to them. The third problem, lack of opportunity for participation in recreational activities, involves a lack of familiarity with the recreational opportunities available, a lack of resourcefulness in making use of them, and living at a distance from the centers of social and recreational life. Wide individual differences were evident in these matters. There are women, whether with large or small incomes, who have a great deal of imagination about leisuretime pursuits for themselves and their families. There are also women in both economic classes who show no imagination in this respect. Thus, while a lack of money limits many, others are handicapped by a lack of imagination and resourcefulness. Another need of these women is human association. Many of them lack the companionship of friends with similar interests. The friendliness and neighborliness many of them knew in their childhood and college days are difficult to maintain in a large city, where people take on a greater degree of impersonality. Behind this impersonality is a yearning for more intimate human association. No part
38
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
of these women's lives reveals their need for response, recognition, and new experiences to challenge their intellectual ability and relieve monotony more clearly than their social and recreational strivings. In general, the recreational life of these women is conditioned by their financial status, their early experiences, what their education has given them in the way of perspective and resourcefulness, their husbands' attitudes, and their social personalities. HEALTH
PROBLEMS
Symptomatic and undiagnosed conditions, disturbances of the respiratory system, disturbances of the nervous system and sense organs, and involvements related to pregnancy, childbearing, and the genitourinary system were the most numerous health problems. Every woman in the study had to make an adjustment to illness; not one escaped. During their childhood, as would be expected, communicable diseases such as measles, chicken pox, whooping cough, mumps, scarlet fever, and the like predominated. It is worth noting that at present most of the women in the group are making use of modern preventive methods and the best medical sources at their command in safeguarding the health of their own children. Symptomatic and undiagnosed conditions include constant headache, chronic fatigue, malnourishment, poor posture, backache, and insomnia. Disturbances of the respiratory system include colds and infections of the nose and throat. Disturbances of the nervous system and sense organs include eyestrain, nervous tension, and ear infections. It is thought that these symptomatic conditions are closely associated with diet, rest, and exercise on the one hand and with strain and nervous tension on the other.
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
39
The relation of respiratory infections to these various factors is not known. Taken together, the relation of these conditions and factors would seem to offer a major area for investigation, not purely from a medical point of view but also from that of the physical and mental hygiene of the individual throughout his development. Many possible implications can be seen here. Not too much is known about these symptomatic and undiagnosed conditions or about respiratory and nervous complications. They constitute rather obscure areas. Often when the doctor finds a diagnosis impossible the symptoms are attributed to psychological causes. A great need for more research in these psychosomatic aspects of health and disease is felt. Nervous tension and strain may be coincident with any new situation, such as going to college, or they may be the result of actual fatigue and strain following prolonged effort. They may also constitute a kind of mechanism for making adjustment to all kinds of situations. An excerpt from a history will illustrate: "Mrs. Taylor showed a poor record of health. Besides many serious illnesses in her history, she first experienced undue fatigue on entering college. She suffered severe fatigue throughout her college attendance. Since then she has often been greatly disturbed by nervous exhaustion." One would expect involvements related to pregnancy, childbearing, and the genitourinary system to loom large after marriage. Even so, it is appalling to find them affecting such a large proportion of these educated women having a relatively high economic status and employing the best of medical and hospital service. In this matter as in others people do not put their knowledge into practice. Not all the blame for health problems can be laid at the door of the school or college, for parents laid the groundwork in
40
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
health habits and attitudes. Whatever the cause, the fact remains that a large majority of the women suffered from chronic fatigue, headache, constipation, eyestrain, menstrual disorders, complications during and following pregnancy, and a host of related disorders. It is possible that the health needs of these women while they were in college might have been met, at least in part, by a more realistic scrutiny of the needs of women and relatively less concern with education and educational methods alone; a more thorough medical examination at college entrance, followed up throughout the college life of the student; and a much closer correlation of those departments of the college or university which have a contribution to make to the student's understanding of healthful living. The girl entering college as a freshman has already formed habits and learned much that may help or handicap her. Her mother's physical care of her and what she has learned at home are important in her physical development and her conditioning towards the factors of health. What she has learned about food and nutrition, sleep, elimination, exercise, sex, and disease before entering college may help or handicap her throughout her college and adult life. At puberty the onset and establishment of menstrual function, the acquiring of biological knowledge of herself as a woman, and a more mature understanding of hygienic living are important developments. At and after the college age come the new experiences, stresses and strains, adjustments and anxieties attending the development of normal heterosexual relations. Later, marriage, pregnancy, and childbearing bring health problems of varying intensity, to say nothing of the emotional and social adjustments involved.
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
41
From this study it seems probable that most of the fundamental health problems of adult college women are taken to college with them, are never discovered or are ignored during this four-year experience, and persist after they leave, along with a few new ones acquired in college. This is not to say that college experience contributes nothing to the healthful living of those who attend, but it does suggest that a greater contribution might be made with the proper correlation of health facilities on the campus. PROBLEMS
OF
EDUCATION
Difficulty with subjects, difficulty in getting along with teachers, and fear of examinations were the problems of education most frequent of occurrence. Formal education played a part in the lives of all these women for at least sixteen years—longer for those who had taken graduate work. During this long, continuous contact with schools, certain specific difficulties were experienced, of which the most nearly universal problem was difficulty with and dislike of certain subjects. Often it appeared that the personality of a teacher was the determining factor in a student's like or dislike for a subject, independent of her interest in the subject matter or her ability to master it. Getting along with teachers was the problem coming next in frequency. Many of these women had conflicts with their teachers from the time of entering school until they had graduated from college. In this connection, a plea might be made for greater recognition of individual differences at the developmental level of college students. Some instructors attempt to deal with all students on a completely adult level; others treat them as youngsters. Under each method, some students
42
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
thrive and others fail. Young students are not all at the same maturity level; they never will be. In the first two years of college one of the big problems is to help the student make the break between adolescence and maturity, and it is important to select instructors who have some understanding of the maturity level and needs of the individual student. Wise instructors can be very helpful to the student during this important transition period. Fear of examinations, the problem ranking third, is probably the one on which research is most needed. To the student, examinations present a recurring threat of failure, beginning early and persisting with increasing intensity through the school and college years. There are a number of implications here: the importance attributed to success and failure in the early training of the child; the emphasis placed by parents upon living up to standards of perfection; the stress which the parents have placed upon the child's obtaining high grades in school; and the relative importance the school or college itself places upon the formal examination. The key to the difficulty lies both with the home, where the parents have so reared the child that any situation carrying a possibility of failure threatens his security, and with the school, which often exerts undue pressure through examinations. Many schools have found successful ways of alleviating this difficulty. Since ability to function adequately in many kinds of primary and secondary group situations is paramount in a society organized on a democratic basis, it would seem that this matter of overcoming the kinds of fears and insecurities experienced in relation to participation in school activities is one of the most vital areas toward which the school should direct its attention.
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S VOCATIONAL
43
PROBLEMS
Family interference in choice of a vocation, lack of good vocational guidance, difficulty in getting along with associates and superiors on the job, lack of vocational preparation and training, and unemployment were the vocational problems most frequently met with. Selecting and preparing for a vocation was of major importance to 97 percent of the women who graduated from coeducational colleges and 87 percent of those from women's colleges. The two outstanding problems in the precollege and college years were family interference in the choice of a vocation and lack of good vocational guidance at home and at school. There is evidence that often parental insistence on a particular vocation for the child is a means of finding fulfillment in the child for what a parent has been unable to accomplish in his or her own life. Other cases show that parental "guidance" is not always true guidance but may be a way of dominating the child. This does not imply that parents have no function in guiding their children in making their choice of a vocation or that they never guide them wisely. But it is true that in general the parents of these women had no adequate knowledge of the vocational opportunities open to their daughters or of ways of training for them. The case of one young woman who was directed into a vocation for which she was unfitted illustrates the unfortunate possibilities of family interference and unwise guidance both at home and in college. Her father was a doctor and she had always been interested in nursing, but upon entering college she was advised that a high-school deficiency in algebra would preclude her registering in the nursing curriculum, and she was admitted as an English
44
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
major. In her family there was a tradition of teaching for the women, the mother had been a teacher, other callings were disparaged, and teaching was given a build-up. The girl did not want to teach, but she followed the line of least resistance and parental desire. She took a teaching job and failed in it, then took further courses in teachers' colleges and failed again. On the other hand, another case illustrates the fact that the parents often saw more clearly than young people the actualities of a vocation and were able to protect them from an unwise vocational choice and at the same time not to disregard this choice. Many young girls, for instance, were fascinated by the uniform and the service possibilities in nursing, without having any real knowledge of the profession. During her high-school days one young woman was sure she wanted to be a nurse, though she knew little about nursing. Her mother dealt with the situation in this way. During the girl's last year in high school she said, "If you want to be a nurse, that is fine. But I suggest that you go to college first, and then you will be in a better position to take up nursing." The girl followed her mother's advice, and by the time she had been at college for two years she had completely abandoned the idea of being a nurse. Unfortunately, this kind of guidance and results were too seldom seen. In most cases vocational guidance was either completely lacking both at home and at school or was so poor as to be of no assistance, when it was not actually detrimental. Such vocational help as was given was usually in job placement rather than in guidance. This lack of guidance and lack of knowledge of the vocational opportunities open to them may account for the fact that most of the young women went into more or less tradi-
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
45
tional types of employment—teaching, clerical work, library work, social service, and nursing. On the job, two major problems arose: first, an immediate awareness of inadequate preparation and training; and second, difficulty in getting along with associates and superiors—the highest-ranking postcollege vocational problem. Teachers, especially, seemed to feel a lack of prepararation for their job. The universality of their feeling that the required courses in Education were useless in preparing them to teach is startling, to say the least. From the report of the group it appears that those least qualified to teach, as well as those best qualified, had only to take the required courses for a certificate to become teachers, regardless of their personal fitness for the vocation. It is striking that difficulty in getting along with their vocational peers and superiors should be the highest-ranking vocational problem. It will be remembered that both in school and in college one of their chief difficulties was conflict with teachers; and relations with their families, relatives and associates offered another of our clients' greatest problems. These difficulties in the human aspects of their jobs suggest a number of queries. Was some feeling of resistance to authority, growing out of their parents' domination of them, operating to interfere with their vocational success? How much time was devoted to the personnel and human relations aspects of their vocational training? The importance of this problem in their vocational lives would seem to have many implications for vocational training and guidance. The problem of unemployment, though often referred to, needs little discussion, for the situation at the time of the study was scarcely typical. The data were gathered
46
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
during the worst years of the depression in a large industrial area which was greatly affected. At this time man)· of the married women who would not ordinarily have been interested in work outside the home expressed a desire for employment in order to supplement the family income. RELIGIOUS
PROBLEMS
Conflict over the religious practices of the family and conflict within self over changing religious values were the primary religious problems. Religious problems were less common than many others in this particular group of women, or at least they were expressed less frequently. One possible explanation is that one may avoid facing one's confusion about religion most of the time, whereas situations involving money, sex, child management, housekeeping, and the like must be met every day. However, the infrequency with which such problems were stated does not necessarily mean that they were insignificant. A definite pattern of religious development and conflict is discernible for most of these women. During their early years their religious conflicts related mainly to the religious practices and attitudes of their families, and were concerned primarily with their obligation to conform to parental ideas of religious practice. Thus, the fact that many activities were forbidden on Sunday— that they could not ride a bicycle or sew, for instance—was troublesome, and though they did conform, they built up some resentment toward conformity. Late in high-school attendance and on going away to college they reached another stage of religious development when they were brought into contact with scientific ideas and different religious values. Here they were confronted with ideas and values which caused confusion and conflict
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
47
within themselves and at the same time they acquired ammunition to use in fighting back at the family. It appears that many young women whose traditional religious beliefs were uprooted by the study of science in college were afterward unable to reintegrate their thinking in terms of their new point of view, or to come to a new philosophy of life in terms of modern science and the newer conceptions of the universe. It is difficult to evaluate the educational implications of these findings except in very general terms. In the first place, virtually the entire group of women had deep-seated emotional feelings and beliefs about religion and religious practices before entering college, most of which they had acquired at home. The impact of the more critical and objective view fostered by institutions of higher learning seems to have caused many of them to question for the first time the traditional teachings of the family and the church. The next step in their religious development was taken as they reached maturity. At this point certain ones of them avoided making any very definite decisions about their religious philosophy. Some accepted their earlier pattern of religious belief and practice, though with qualms. Others rejected this early pattern, with obvious feelings of guilt. Of these last some failed to arrive at any satisfactory substitute for this early pattern, while a few worked out a new philosophy of life. Those who married had to meet this issue squarely as their children began to grow up, for questions of the religious practices they wished to observe, of whether to send the children to Sunday school, and if so, to what one, served to renew their confusion over religious beliefs and to bring the problem into focus again.
48
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It appears that the religious problems of these women were more or less latent and became active only when they were obliged in one way or another to state their beliefs. As long as they could avoid facing the issue, they did so. Many of them said that religion constituted a problem for them, but they went little further and seemed to be inarticulate in discussing this aspect of their lives. The trend of religious problems was the same for single and married women. A third to a half of the group had conflicts with their families and some inner conflict about their religious beliefs before entering college. This proportion dropped to a third or less of the group during college attendance and shortly thereafter but increased again to include more than fifty percent of the group at the time of the study. The results of the inquiry reflect the effort of the family to interpret and transmit the traditional cultural sanctions to children and sometimes to force acceptance of them. The child's revolt is not so much against the idea or belief itself as against the method used in pressing it upon him. He needs the insight gained through experience as much as the intellectual knowledge gained through being told. In religious matters the family, as well as the child, labors under the difficulty of living in a rapidly changing world where the values held important by society are less well defined and less generally accepted than formerly and where even the church is finding it necessary to redefine and restate its interpretation of the meaning and function of religion in the light of modern conditions. HOUSEKEEPING
PROBLEMS
Dislike of household tasks, lack of skill, and difficulties with household help were the foremost problems in this field.
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
49
Eighty-two percent of the group had housekeeping problems. Dislike of household activities, which ranked high as a problem, was associated with several factors. Some of the women had had no experience of housekeeping in their parental homes or at school which gave them enough satisfaction to lend such tasks the degree of interest that they have for many women. Actual lack of skill in performing many of the routines also caused distaste and dissatisfaction. It is true, as well, that the amount of routine and repetitious work in the home makes for monotony, and that the opportunity for use of intellectual and creative ability is almost nil in many household tasks. Again, even women who possessed some skill, liked the household responsibility accompanying marriage, and found many ways of reducing the sense of monotony in the job often felt that what they were doing had little social status. The problem ranking second was lack of housekeeping skills. Only eleven percent of the women in the study were graduates in college home economics, and the rest of the group, accordingly, must have acquired whatever housekeeping skills and experience they possessed at home or in home economics courses below the college level. The lack of skills shown by many of the group may be accounted for in several ways: by a lack of experience and training in the management of a household; by a distaste for household tasks; by the interference of other interests; and by a lack of aptitude for acquiring such skills. The third problem, difficulty with household help, includes that of finding suitable help, the problem of getting along with helpers in the home, and the frequent lack of any realistic conception of what should be expected of household help. It is hard for the woman who has had little experience in running a home and little knowledge of what it entails to plan and direct the work of household helpers.
50
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PROBLEMS
Again, many women seem unable to realize that they expect to get efficient, experienced assistance for a wage that does not command it. Does it seem odd that so large a proportion of married women whose work is homemaking should find housekeeping distasteful and uninteresting and that they should be so lacking in household skills? Might we expect that in an economically privileged group of this kind the multitude of modern conveniences would minimize such difficulties? We must realize, however, that no number of mechanical devices will in and of themselves alter attitudes toward household work. Something must be done by education or other means to offset the low status that society assigns to this part of women's role and the small importance attributed to such responsibilities by many educational institutions and by the husbands and friends of the women involved. FINANCIAL
PROBLEMS
Insufficient income, difficulty of living within one's income, and lack of money as a limiting factor in recreational and social activities constituted the major financial problems. There was no woman in the group who did not have financial problems, regardless of how high her income was. The assumption of some economists that most personal problems would be solved if the economic level of the population could be raised sufficiently is not borne out by the experience of these women. Although above average in economic background and status, all had money problems. Scrutiny shows that the most common difficulty, insufficient income, has several angles. First, small income, un-
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
51
employment and the exhaustion of savings, or some crisis placed some of the clients in actual want. About this aspect of the problem the individual can do little, though the way in which he meets such a situation is important and varies greatly from one person to another. The second factor is a possible discrepancy between what the individual has been accustomed to and his present financial status. Many of the women in the group had grown up in families of much greater affluence than they enjoyed after marriage, and it was difficult for them to learn to live on a lower income level. This factor operated also when the husband's income was sharply cut, even if after such a reduction the income was still a generous one by ordinary standards. A third angle is that some women, regardless of the actual amount of their income—whether it was $3,000, $5,000, or $10,000—or of any disparity between their present and former economic status, or their ability to live within their income, still felt that they lacked sufficient income. One finds basic differences in the importance which the individual attaches to economic status. The economic position of associates, both in childhood and youth and in adult life, may accentuate many of the individual's feelings about his own position. Among a few of the women of the study who belonged to the same sorority there were wide differences in actual income. One woman, who had the lowest family income and was unable to dress or entertain as elaborately as the others, accepted her situation without apparent fret or disturbance, participated actively in the group, and took life in her stride. In this same set was another young woman whose income was several times as great, but who constantly complained that her clothes were
52
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PROBLEMS
not as nice as those of the others, her home not as well furnished, and so on. She felt that her income was insufficient, even though it had increased, and that her economic status was inferior as compared with that of her friends. The second major problem, living within one's income, was a difficulty common to everyone in the study. Making ends meet was a practical problem familiar to all of them. Even when the income was increased, further obligations, a little exceeding the increase, were incurred. If the income increases in arithmetic ratio, wants seem to increase in geometric ratio. Here the proper conception and use of a budget might have been helpful, but there was little indication that these women were utilizing such help from the field of economics in planning an intelligent spending program. Almost all had taken courses in economics, but there seemed to be little if any carry-over from such courses to the practical problems of family finance. The expression of dogged resistance usually assumed at the mention of the word "budget" is evidence of the lack of understanding of the purpose of a budget. A budget does not, will not, and cannot tell anyone how to spend his income. It can, however, if properly used, help anyone to spend his money for the goods and services he wishes to purchase. These women obviously failed to gain such a conception from their education. A third important problem was the extent to which a lack of money limited the recreational and social activities of the family. Many married women were limited in their opportunity to participate in the cultural, social, and recreational life of the community by low income and high living expenses, and in particular by prohibitive transportation costs and a lack of means to hire someone to stay with the children during the parents' absence.
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
53
While the introduction and increasing use of laborsaving devices in the home and the attendant freeing of women's hands from household tasks have made the need for creative outlets and recreational participation increasingly important from the point of view of mental hygiene, many women lack such opportunities, while others find their participation limited by the cost and difficulty of access to such activities. CRISES
Deaths, critical illnesses, accidents, family crises, school relationships, premarital and marital relationships, and pregnancy and childbearing were the major problems in the crisis classification. All people in the course of a lifetime must face many crises. Some are inevitable and predictable, others unpredictable and uncertain in their effects. Illness and bereavement are certain to be a part of the experience of every adult, though it is impossible to say when they will occur and difficult to make any direct preparation to meet them. Entering school, leaving home for the first time, marrying, and the coming of a child may be critical experiences in the life of the individual. Even seemingly normal, everyday occurrences constitute crises for some people, while others seem to resolve and work through the most devastating circumstances. More than 80 percent of the women of the group experienced crisis situations after graduation from college, and more than 75 percent did so before and during college attendance. For the group as a whole, death, critical illnesses, and accidents were the outstanding crises at all stages of development. They included the deaths of family members, friends, their own husbands, and their children.
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PROBLEMS
The crises ranking next were difficulties in relationships with family members, involving parent-child and sibling adjustments. Even after they had entered college, these women experienced many such crises. Ranking third were traumatic experiences occurring in school relationships before entrance to college. These included experiences on the first day of school, being embarrassed by the teacher or by unexpected situations, being unfairly or excessively disciplined, and being excluded from play by other children. In the postcollege period and at the time of the study, more crises related to premarital and marital relationships than to any other factors except bereavement and critical illness. These critical experiences included love affairs, breaking off engagements, deciding on engagement and marriage, wedding plans, and relationships with fiancé. After marriage, there were crises involving sex adjustment, pregnancy, childbirth, lactation, abortion, miscarriage, sterility, and unwanted pregnancies. Besides such crises of a serious nature, many incidents have proved to be traumatic in greater or lesser degree. Embarrassments, homesickness, disillusionments, sudden frights, the uprooting of religious beliefs, and the like have been the cause of many emotional difficulties. The loss of a job, reduced income, school failures, and conflicts with teachers are other situations which were critical for many women. It is clear that since almost any situation may prove to be a crisis for the individual, the degree to which it is critical depends largely upon the extent to which the individual has developed a personality capable of facing and resolving difficulties. Little or nothing can be done to prevent the sudden
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
55
death of a parent, brother, sister, or friend; but much can be done to reduce the difficulty with which the individual adjusts himself to such a bereavement. Still more is it possible to prepare the individual to meet crises arising out of relations between parents and children, between siblings, and between other relatives; school examinations and failures; and courtship, marital relations, pregnancy, and childbirth. Crises arising out of such situations may be said to fall in the category of those preventable by education, for through education the individual learns to make a better adjustment to them. To live, one must experience; and all experience is to some degree new experience. Even the second or tenth game of chess, building one's fourth house, having a third baby, and marrying a second time are new experiences, though the elements common in such repetitions may facilitate the process, reduce anxiety, and enhance the value of the result. Another important characteristic of experience is the kind of attitudes and feelings accompanying it. The quality of initial experience is unusually potent in determining the effective tone of the individual toward it and toward repetitions of the experience. This factor was not sufficiently considered in any aspect of learning by the teachers and parents of the women studied, since the women had apparently failed to utilize life situations to build up a philosophy and technique for meeting future critical situations. To sum up: Any experience holds the potentiality of being a destructive crisis experience or a constructive learning situation. In the interest of reducing the emotional and intellectual damage resulting from such crises, education might well direct a share of its attention to a study of
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PROBLEMS
normal life situations which may prove to be critical in the development of the individual. PROBLEMS
OF
SEXUAL
ADJUSTMENT
Unfavorable attitudes toward and about sex, lack of adequate sex education throughout development, conflict over courtship practices, and difficult sex adjustment in marriage were the most frequent problems of sexual adjustment. Approximately three fourths of the married women had problems of sex adjustment before they went to college and after graduation. At the time of the study about 50 percent of them reported problems of this nature. The single women showed a slightly lower percentage of these problems before attending college. About 27 percent reported such problems immediately after graduation, but at the time of the study their sex problems were double those of the immediate postcollege period. Whether or not the problems were discussed freely and frankly in every case, it is highly significant that 56 percent of the entire group of women faced problems of sex adjustment at the time they were interviewed. The data reveal four outstanding difficulties. ( 1 ) Unfavorable attitudes toward sex.—The women had many unresolved fears, anxieties, and insecurities about sex, about their own sexuality and their husbands', and about the sex education and behavior of their children. Few had acquired a conception of sex as a normal part of everyone, which is continuous throughout life and has to be dealt with at different stages of development and in different ways. Many had suffered some kind of traumatic sex experience as children. Unfortunate family conditioning, the talk of older children, participation in adolescent
EVERYDAY PROBLEMS
57
kissing games, or more serious episodes such as seeing an exhibitionist, not being prepared for menstruation, and having an unfortunate sex experience with a man or woman friend before marriage seemed to leave a residue that was carried over into adult life. (2) A gross ignorance about sex; inadequate and sporadic sex education.—Words, language, and behavior associated in any way with sex were taboo. This entire phase of their development was shrouded in mystery and ignorance. Their own normal functions of menstruation and childbearing had received scant, if any, consideration, either at home or at school. (3) Conflict over courtship practices.—These women were, or had been, faced with the kinds of problems common to almost any group of young people living in our culture. They expressed guilt over petting even in its mildest forms, for their early training had set such strict taboos and restrictions on physical contact that any such practice was "not nice." Their guilt was in strong conflict with their enjoyment of this new experience. The inevitable question of "how far to go" was before most of them. The only answer to this perplexing question offered by parents or teachers was a further prohibition. There were conflicts also with boys who were very convincing as to the desirability of petting. As can be seen in the case of Mrs. Taft, many were in conflict with women friends whose standards of sex conduct were less strict than their own. (4) Specific kinds of sex difficulty after marriage.— These difficulties included fear of pregnancy, lack of response, difference between response of wife and husband, conflicts over frequency of coitus, difficulties over type and
58
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
use of contraceptives, and attitudes toward sex expression. It is significant that one of the four major sources of conflict between husband and wife arose over the husband's particular sex techniques and ideas. For the majority of women in this study, as for the majority of those reported in other studies, coitus was a new experience fraught with all the anxieties and apprehensions which attend any new experience of equal importance. In sex adjustment there is an additional element of anxiety, since it involves intense emotional feelings as well as the adjustment of two individuals whose backgrounds of training and experience are likely to have been widely different. The man's understanding of the woman and the woman's understanding of the man need to be achieved in the early years of married life. Allowing for much ignorance of sex matters, bad early conditioning, and inadequate sex education, poor sexual adjustment in marriage must be taken to a certain extent as symptomatic of conflict in other areas of family relationships. Two cases, one that of a single woman, one of a married woman, are presented to show the persistence of sex problems throughout development and the extent to which early attitudes and conditioning during the precollege period may be significant in sex adjustment during college attendance and afterward. It should be borne in mind that excerpts taken out of their context show only the type of problem presented. Only by reading all such pertinent excerpts in sequence and other material in the case dealing with relationships associated with sex, can one appreciate the realistic way in which these problems are interrelated with other types of individual and family adjustments.
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PROBLEMS
59
Case of Miss X PRECOLLEGE
I remember my shock, when I moved to another city, in being exposed to tough children on the schoolground, where I was introduced to a new vocabulary and was quite shocked at the swearing and stories which were told. I was quite curious but had very inadequate information on matters pertaining to sex and the human body. I have always had a definite abhorrence of the nude. My mother was overscrupulous about nudeness, but my father was really a prude. My mother tried to explain all of the secrets of childbirth to me when I was about twelve. I told her that I was not interested and did not want the information from her. I have always been sensitive and uncomfortable on the subject, particularly in relation to my parents, but I usually satisfied my curiosity by looking at medical books which I had no business looking at. COLLEGE
I thought the professors were too free in their discussion of subjects concerning sex. Nudity was a frightful thought to me. My college training contributed nothing, and I got a lot of misinformation from my social contacts. At first I was shocked to talk about these things with boys, but finally I met a medical student who told me a good deal that was helpful. While in college an acquaintance who stayed overnight with me made some attempt at homosexual relations which was quite disturbing to me. Any physical contact of this sort with girls is disgusting to me. POSTCOLLEGE U N T I L P R E S E N T
While working on my first job my personality became very unstable. The girls with whom I worked were coarse and different from any with whom I had ever associated. I was shocked but thrilled by their behavior. Mother worried a great deal about me through this period. My job was too big for me and as a result I was tired out. Advances from men in the office became a chai-
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PROBLEMS
lenge to me and I wanted to see how far I could go. I was going with five or six boys at this time and never had any trouble with them, although one or two of them made me realize the effect I had on men. This exasperated me. After working there for nine months I left. When I changed jobs my eyes were opened still further. The man who employed me was a cad. From the first day I worked for him he made advances to me. He was a married man. He tried to persuade me that we had the type of love which justified sex relations, but my home influence would not allow me to think so. He used to stop for me in the evenings, ostensibly to do extra work at the office. Instead, we would go out for an evening of amusement. During this period I was in an adventurous, high-strung condition. The men with whom I had dates were well educated and of high type. They were older and had more poise and money than the boys with whom I had previously gone about. They used to take me to shows and dinners. After graduation from college I went into business. Surrounded by businessmen, I was, as my mother expressed it, so green that I did not realize how keenly I was aroused in my relationships with them. Actually, many advances were made to me, of the meaning of which I was unaware. Sex, I found, was a thing of great contention in the business world. Its influence is felt in every situation involving girls and men. My curiosity at first was innocent. A man who fascinated and thrilled me by attention was the type of employer I sought. I found many. My home influence, my own fear and ignorance of sex, and the remonstration of my parents guided me through this period, but then they broke down. I believe now my curiosity is satisfied, and I thank the Lord for it. My first actual sex experience with a man was on the pretext of finding out whether we were suited to each other. Our sex relations were not at all pleasurable. The failure bothered him and he still persisted, and under a great deal of pressure on his part the relationship was continued every three or four months but although it did not prove at all satisfactory to me it satisfied my curiosity.
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
61
Case of Mrs. Q PRECOLLEGE
I had no sex education from my mother. I learned of reproduction little by little from three cousins with whom I used to associate in the summertime. We went to the home of my grandmother in summer and these cousins lived in the neighborhood. I spent most of my time with them, and from about eight or nine to eleven years of age we spent every summer together talking over matters of sex and reproduction and piecing together the information we had gathered. I think Father did tell me about babies growing in their mothers' bodies. He showed me a few pictures. That was the only direct help I ever had. My attitude toward anything connected with sex was one of extreme disgust. I never got over this feeling and have never liked anything that has any bearing on questions of sex. All these conversations with my little cousins were fascinating to me at the time and my curiosity was greatly aroused, as were my feelings of utter disgust. There was a considerable amount of sex play among us children in the country and it fascinated me at the time, although afterward I always had guilty feelings about it. This kind of sex play continued every summer until about the time I started to menstruate. I felt guilty about these sex activities for a long time afterward and never discussed them with anyone. [When asked why she had discussed the matter with the interviewer, she said, with obvious emotional tension] You are the first person with whom I have ever discussed it. It has seemed so disgusting to me and I feel that everything concerning sex is dirty. By the time I married I had built up a very ideal picture of it, but with the beginning of marriage these feelings of disgust again descended upon me. I started to menstruate at eleven and a half. I had learned about menstruation from other youngsters, so when my first period occurred I went to Mother to ask what I should do. Mother then told me something of the connection between menstruation and reproduction. It was an embarrassing moment
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PROBLEMS
for both my mother and me, and we have never been able to discuss sex except on rare occasions. I managed to get the rest of my sex education through the same method that I had used earlier. COLLEGE
In college I met one man who was extremely anxious to marry me. He was somewhat older than I was, and I liked him but did not want to marry him. I met him through my roommate and went with him about a year. I did not care for him particularly, nor did I feel at all physically attracted to him. I let him kiss me a couple of times, but I could not bear to have him touch me. This affair was gradually broken off. I had no kind of scientific help or knowledge of sex, with the exception of that one short talk with my father, until I went to college. There they gave some talks which were supposed to explain many things, but actually were not enlightening in any way. I feel that that was one of the places where I could have been given help, but where I received none. POSTCOLLEGE TO
PRESENT
There was always a conflict in my mind over our courtship practices, as I had so many inhibitions to overcome and it was hard to give them all up. As I look back now I think our early attraction for each other and marriage were based too much on the physical and not enough on the intellectual. I realize I was not ardent enough for him then, nor have I ever been. As to my courtship practices with other men, they may have wanted to be romantic, but I always hated that kind of thing. There was no petting between other men and me, with the exception of an occasional kiss. I had no help with my marital adjustment. The only thing Mother said was that I should be sure to fix the date of my marriage to follow directly after menstruation, so that I should not have a baby right away. My husband and I discussed our mari-
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
63
tal relations before marriage, and he gave me all the information I had. I found my early adjustment to marriage difficult because I had no background of experience. My first baby came fairly soon after marriage, and it was hard for me to learn the necessary things about housekeeping and look after a small baby at the same time. I think that my sex adjustment during our honeymoon worked out fairly well, though I realized that my husband was much more eager for intercourse than I was. I do not think that he assumed his rôle as educator sufficiently in helping to establish satisfactory marital relations. Whether he knew what to do or not, I did not know. He could have made me enjoy our physical relations, but there were no preliminaries whatsoever, and intercourse occurred entirely too frequently. It took place every night. It was rather disappointing to me during the honeymoon, but I soon felt that I had achieved a fairly satisfactory adjustment. However, I had never really enjoyed intercourse until we went on a trip last year, when for the first time in my married life I experienced an orgasm. The real change in our relations came about five years ago. They have gradually decreased, until within the past year we have had intercourse only three times. It is embarrassing to express one's feelings and to make advances which are evidently not wanted and are usually repulsed. I have had almost no fear of disease. It has been only lately that I have had any fear of becoming pregnant, but it is no real worry, for I feel that our contraceptive measures are completely adequate. I was not eager to become pregnant early in marriage and always had the feeling that I did not want to bother with condoms, which my husband has used since early marriage. We have also practiced withdrawal, but this method has been very unsatisfactory. I have had to make quite a bit of adjustment to marriage, and I should have made more. Only recently have I learned that our marital relations have never been satisfactory to my husband. I am beginning to realize that this lack of satisfaction has been far greater than I had believed. I had always thought our sex
64
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
life was fairly well worked out and that it was relatively unimportant to us, but I am now coming to the belief that it is the most important thing. I had little advice about sex relations before marriage except what my husband told me. Almost all my sex information came from my girl friends. I had some courses in college but cannot remember very much about them. If I had had more information I would have waited for my first baby. My husband was more eager for our first baby than I was. I feel that having the baby so quickly made for some of our marital difficulties. I could not go out socially and was not so attractive, and had not learned to manage a home. I think that I might not have had so much difficulty in learning to manage a home if I had not been pregnant. From such material it is evident that in the precollege period a very close relation exists between problems of sex adjustment and the individual's relations with her family and associates. During college attendance the outstanding difficulties seem to be tied up with a lack of suitable techniques for dealing with the ordinary social-sex problems of that period and with a continuing lack of sex education and the failure of the college program to provide such education. After graduation, all these factors seem to come into play rather crucially, as shown by experiences during engagement, the type of problems occurring in marriage, and the sex attitudes carried over into marriage from earlier experience. RELATIONS
WITH
ASSOCIATES
Conflict with teachers, relations with boys and men, relations with other adults and attitudes towards and about people caused more difficulty than any of the other problems in the classification of relations with associates. There is not a primitive group or a highly organized na-
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
65
tìon which is not continually confronted with the problem of human relations as they bear upon government, the regulation of the conduct of human beings, and organized economic life. Because getting along with people is an adjustment which every person must inevitably make, it stands out as one of the most important problem areas in the present study, and as constantly and consistently important throughout the whole period of development. At the precollege level 82 percent of the women had definite conflicts and problems in their relations with associates. During the college period the figure rose to 90 percent, and for the period immediately afterward and at the time of the study the percentages were 86 and 91, respectively. That is to say, between 80 and 90 percent of these women have experienced difficulty in working out their relations with associates other than relatives. It should be emphasized that the outstanding problems of their relations with associates, both before and during their college days, involved their elders rather than their peers. At both periods, conflicts with teachers, instructors, and professors stood at the head of the list. The crux of the matter seems to go back to parental domination. If the child is involved in conflict with another child, he can strike back and the struggle for domination is settled, at least temporarily. With the parent, teacher, or other adult, however, he has no suffrage. His vote does not count. He can only make an adjustment by submitting and conforming or by running away. As one child expressed it, "Well, Mom, you've got me either coming or going. You say to take my own responsibility, but if I do not take it the way you want me to, you take away the responsibility." Three problems developed as the women reached late college and postcollege life: difficult relations with voca-
66
EVERYDAY
PROBLEMS
tional associates and superiors; difficult relations with men during the period of courtship and engagement; and an all-pervading set of negative attitudes towards adults which revealed their insecurity and inadequacy and their need to build themselves up by criticizing others, to give vent to their hostilities and resentments, and to reproduce the dominant pattern of early adult experience at home. Difficulties in all these areas were directly in line with their early experience with adults at home and in school. The characteristic personalities of the women were reflected in the way they made their adjustment to vocational associates, in projecting and rationalizing their own inadequacies, and in the difficulties they had in making an adequate heterosexual adjustment. There was little discernible difference in the problems of this nature met before and during the time they were in college. At the time of the study, all the single women and 88 percent of the married women were experiencing difficulty in their relations with associates other than relatives. The large percentage of married women who were having such problems while they were making adjustments to husband, in-laws, and children is probably to be explained by the characteristics of the sample, which included many married women who were interested in community and social activities and who were thus brought into contact with many people outside their homes. The high percentage of both single and married women who experienced difficulty in their relations with associates reflects the perplexities and problems attending human associations throughout adult life and suggests the importance of making proper adjustments in this phase of life. Making heterosexual adjustments, dating, courting, and being engaged all involve new experiences for everyone.
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
67
At the precollege and college levels, few of the women of this study had acquired techniques for meeting and associating with men. Lack of dates, conflict over courtship practices, naïveté, and inadequate sex education entered into their difficulty in getting along with men. Those women of the group whose families had helped them to establish normal relations with boys and were tolerant of and sympathetic towards their dating activities seem to have made the easiest and most successful adjustments. Few, however, had much understanding of themselves as women or of men as men, or of the traditional cultural roles of the two sexes and the conflicts between men and women occasioned by cultural change. Most of the group felt inferior and inadequate in their relations with others, as shown by such remarks as, "I am not accepted by my associates. I just cannot meet strangers. I know I am not as attractive as so-and-so." Why should women so economically secure, with an excellent education and good social standing, feel so? What are the problems of prestige and status which enter here? What had been the kind of training and experience which gave them such a sense of inadequacy? What kind of response to authority, entering into all later adjustments with associates, had been built up in the early years? To what extent were cultural change and confusion responsible? The problems arising in human relations outside the home have significant implications for all social and institutional life. They affect the success or failure of lodges, churches, schools, civic administration, national government, and international relations. All matters of production, distribution, and finance are operated through the medium of human relations. Each individual's conception of himself and his role in relation to the general welfare
68
EVERYDAY P R O B L E M S
and the techniques of human association which he has acquired in the course of development are fundamental not only to his individual success in life but also to the totality of human progress. Individual psychology, individual economics, and individual religion all have an effect on and a responsibility toward total group welfare, survival, and improvement. The pattern of prolonged parental domination which builds up in the individual the need to take out on society his hostilities and repressions in adult life cannot build the kind of group culture upon which democracy depends. The establishment of the nature of society truly begins at home. RELATIONS
WITH
RELATIVES
Parental domination, revolt against and break from family, and continuation of break from family were more frequently met with than other problems of relations with relatives. The parents of these women exerted a powerful influence over their early lives. Each of the group, as a child, had already acquired patterns of response and methods of meeting situations by the time she entered school. The process of adjustment to parental domination, rejection, or overindulgence stands out as the most important problem encountered by these women during their early years. In these years, for which 100 percent of the single women and 91 percent of the married women reported problems in their relations with their parents, the feelings and attitudes which gave rise to open conflict and revolt against parental domination in adolescence were born. About 70 percent of the group reported problems of this kind in the college period, when many parents continued to try to hold on to their daughters, overprotect them, and
EVERYDAY
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69
regulate every detail of their lives. At this period, however, the girl was in a position to assert some degree of independence from parental authority, and the typical picture was a breaking away from family ties and a revolt against parental overprotection. The problem confronting the girl at this period was to emancipate herself from family authority, to learn to order her own life, and to establish an adult attitude toward and relation with her parents. For some of the group this revolt began early and ended early, but for others it began late and was never quite successfully completed. But even while the girl found great relief in being able to strike back, to revolt, to break away from parental authority, she experienced an increasing sense of guilt in doing so. She had a deep-seated emotional attachment to her parents and felt guilty about her treatment of them. Meanwhile, she discovered that much as she wanted to grow up and manage her own life, she was immature and inexperienced and suffered many frustrations and failures in her attempts to do so. Because she was unable to manage her life as smoothly as she had imagined she could, she began to strike harder against parental influence and to project much of the blame for her inadequacy upon her family. And truly enough, the family was to blame for part of her difficulty, insofar as they were overindulgent, inconsistent in their training, and unskillful in handling everyday situations, went too far in making the child satisfy their own emotional needs, and failed in helping her to acquire selfsufficiencv and to make the necessary break from the family. Running along with this series of adjustments to their parents were conflicts with brothers and sisters, which were a source of considerable trouble to some of the group.
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One of the most significant aspects of this picture is the extent to which the early pattern of the girl's relation to her parents is carried over into adult life. In only a few instances had the girl and her parents achieved a mature adult relation by the time of her marriage. Rather, there was a continuation of the adolescent revolt and breaking away from the parents. Some had achieved a more mature relationship at eighteen than others had attained at forty-five. For the parent, the problem is one of emotional unwillingness or inability to relinquish control over the child; for the girl herself, it is one of having acquired an overdependence which, coupled with the overprotective pattern of the parent, is difficult to break down. In the years immediately after college, 74 percent of the married women and 68 percent of the single women report problems of this kind, of which the five high-ranking problems were concerned primarily with the continued attempts of their parents to dominate their lives. Many of the women were critical of their parents at this time, felt that their parents dominated them, were unfair to them, and in some cases rejected them. In most cases, there was actual conflict. At the time of the study, 80 percent of the married women and 77 percent of the single women reported problems of this kind. The following excerpts from one case study illustrate a pattern of parental dominance. The continuation of such problems from one period of development to another and their interrelations with other areas of experience are evident. Case of Miss Johnson PRECOLLEGE
Client-sibling relations Quarreled a great deal with brother.
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Parents' discipline Mother's and father's scoldings and punishments evaded by escape into a dream world. Whipped by mother for carrying water in an expensive hat. Mother whipped her with a hairbrush when she disobeyed. Reprimanded by mother and father for deliberately doing what she was not supposed to do. Client-parent conflict Friction between her and her mother over wearing rubbers and raincoat and carrying an umbrella. Client-parent relations affected by sex attitudes Mother gave her no information about menstruation except the usual "don'ts" at its onset when she was sixteen. Mother and father gave her no other kind of sex information. Client-parent relations affected by her dating and relations with boys Deceived father by going riding with a boy he disapproved of instead of attending a party. Father lectured her severely when a boy of whom he disapproved brought her home. Parental disapproval or criticism Mother's habit of pointing out her faults and physical limitations caused her to feel very self-conscious. Mother and father criticized her tendency to be secretive. Mother provoked with her over enuresis. Mother preferred that she stay out of the kitchen because she was always getting in the way. Father strongly disapproved of her self-admiration before a long mirror. Mother and father disapproved of her seeming lack of interest in cooking and sewing, though no provision was made for practice in these arts. Mother nagged her a great deal. Client-parent relations affected by money Mother insisted on her accounting for all the money she spent. Mother and father considered her spending money on magazines extremely foolish.
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Client-parent relations affected by interests and hobbies Mother and father forbade her to read novels because of the ill effects on her eyes. Father felt she could do things more worth while than reading all the time. Mother's attitude toward entertaining friends in the home Mother considered her peculiar because she seldom brought friends home. Client-parent relations affected by clothing Friction with mother over selection of clothing. Mother never permitted her to choose her own clothes. Conflict with mother over wearing long underwear during winter. Client's relations with aunt Evaded aunt's strict rules by telling lies. Aunt's close supervision a handicap to her socially. Aunt had habit of calling client s parents every time she did something of which aunt disapproved. Aunt refused to allow her to choose her own friends. Aunt insisted upon her working arithmetic problems while other children played. Aunt permitted no social contacts with boys and few with girls. Aunt always insisted upon accompanying her. Aunt refused to permit her to talk about things in which she was interested and insisted that she discuss intellectual topics. Aunt insisted on selecting client's clothing while she lived there. Annoyed by aunt's insistence that she accompany her when she distributed baskets of food. Teased and ridiculed by parents Mother made fun of her for talking to an imaginary playmate. Relation with mother Lack of freedom in the parental home when mother was around. Mother considered her extremely vain.
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Parents never understood her Mother and father discussed her misdemeanors and said they could not understand why she acted so. Mother and father never understood her. COLLEGE
Client-parent conflict Mother selected clothes which client disliked because they were different from those worn by other girls. Parental opposition to her joining a sorority a disappointment. Client's criticism of her mother Mother restricted her freedom. Mother failed to understand her. Client-parent relations affected by money Father upset when she overdrew her bank account. Never allowed to write checks on her father's account or use mother's charge account. Mother's and father's criticism of her spending money for popular magazines was resented. Parental domination and overprotection Mother and father never permitted her to drive a car so she could furnish her own transportation to and from school. Family's attitude towards dating and men friends Extremely critical of the boys with whom she had dates; friction over a Jewish boy-friend. Parental nagging and criticism Mother's habit of pointing out her faults extremely annoying. Mother's nagging so irritating that she escaped by deliberately thinking of something else. Nagged by mother and father about the nature and amount of her reading. Demands of parents and relatives These demands constituted a problem. POSTCOLLEGE AND PRESENT
Client's attitude towards parents Lack of interests in common with her family.
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Parent-client conflict Mother's annoyance over her failure to listen to discussions about her conduct. Mother's advice during periods of indecision disregarded. Client-parent relations affected by parental domination Close family supervision prevents frequent dating. Mother and father make all decisions for her. Client-parent relations affected by attitudes and situations involving money Failure of father to send her money because he feels that a college graduate should be able to support herself. Asking father for money extremely difficult for her. Client-relative relations Aunt's statement that she was "impossible" extremely upsetting to her. Client-parent relations affected by parents' criticism and unfairness Mother's habit of continually pointing out her faults makes her feel very self-conscious in mother's presence. Mother pointed out her faults to her but never gave her approval. Readiness of parents to point out her faults, always emphasizing her queerness. Mother felt she was in the way when she wanted to help with household tasks. Mother's and father's complaint that she was not like other girls. Demands of parents and relatives Still a problem. Family's attitude towards her entertaining and recreation Father extremely upset over her inviting home a chance acquaintance whom she met recently. Parents' inquiries about her dates or social affairs annoyed her. Lack of closeness to parents and inability to talk things over with them Mother annoyed by her failure to discuss her affairs with her boy friends.
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75
Lack of affection Mother and father fail to show any affection for her. Strong attachment to and dependence on parents Mother's and father's approval of anyone she might choose to marry would be necessary. Family tends to make her feel dependent and inferior. Relations with mother affected by choice of clothing Continued friction between her and her mother because of her dislike for the type of clothing selected by her mother. This case illustrates a continuing parental domination over the life of a girl after she had graduated from college and reached chronological maturity. The material for the precollege period makes it amply evident that there has been a great deal of conflict between parents and daughter and an attempt on their part to regulate and direct almost every activity of her life. Their severe discipline was no doubt occasioned in part by her developing habits of evasion and deception, and this discipline in turn perhaps intensified her revolt against their authority in adolescence. She seems to have had little place in the family and to have found little real security or affection there. Both her parents and her other relatives disapproved of her conduct. Her mother made fun of her imaginary playmate, though many children have such playmates. She seems to have suffered both ridicule and misunderstanding in her developing years. In these years she built up a resentment and hostility toward her family which continued in adulthood. During the college period her mother still selected her clothes, restricted her freedom at home, criticized the way she spent her money, and pointed out her faults. The girl continued to live under censorship with respect to the boys with whom she dated. Her parents as usual interfered with her social activities. At the time of the study this young woman, though still
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unmarried, had developed a degree of self-sufficiency and independence from her family. However, her mother was still attempting to advise her about her conduct, was still checking on her relations with other people, making her aware of her faults and peculiarities, and censoring her for the company she kept, and was still annoyed when she did not discuss every detail of her life. The young woman has never had much approval or affection from her family and as a result finds it difficult to make adjustments, not only in relation to her family but in many other areas as well. This case raises certain questions with reference to education. The many young women who enter college every year carry with them both the positive and negative effects of their home influence. Many are handicapped by criticism and lack of parental approval and affection and continue to be under the constant surveillance and censorship of their families. It is indeed difficult to say just where the problem of education begins in cases of this sort and how the program of the public school system and of colleges in particular can contribute to the maturing of such young women as Miss Johnson. For those who argue that the family is becoming of less importance in our culture, the data from this phase of the study may raise some question. No definite answer can be made as to whether or not there is more or less actual conflict than formerly between parents and their children as they grow to maturity. From both scientific and popular sources it would seem that, historically speaking, children have always been problems to their parents and parents have always attempted to direct in greater or less degree the lives of their children beyond the age of maturity. It may be true that in the past the family was more dominating and exacting in what it expected of the children and
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that the mores formerly gave a more authoritative position to the parents in relation to their children. The attempt to give the individual more freedom and to establish a democratic relation between parents and children may in part account for the conflicts and difficulties now faced by parents and for the difficulties of children who suffer from the lack of a stabilized pattern of what is expected of them. When a culture reinforces the role that a member of the society is expected to carry out, there is a tendency to reduce the conflict in the mind of the person in authority and the resistance that those under authority feel justified in making to authority. Human relations begin at home but they do not end there. There is no more continuous or universal experience in life than one's relation with other people. To understand one's self, to know the basis and significance of one's daily behavior, and to be able to understand and enjoy social and working relations with other human beings—these are the most important accomplishments for parents and educators to try to acquire for themselves and to pass on to children growing into maturity. In summary, we may say in relation to the women of this study that the beginnings of personality and the basic pattern of human associations were definitely set in the early home relations and conditioning of the majority. Such conditioning may have either a positive or a negative value. Adjustment to parental authority began early and continued up to the time of the study. It is of interest to see how these women got along with associates other than relatives; how they handled situations with their husbands and their own children; whether their parents created problems for them as unwise grandparents and parents-in-law; and whether these women re-
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peated the pattern under which they grew up or were able materially to alter this pattern in their own families. HUSBAND-WIFE
RELATIONS
Struggle for domination, adjustment to sex relations, financial conflict, and adjustment to differences in personal habits and cultural backgrounds were the most frequently occurring causes of difficulty in the marital relationships. Marriage brings to woman one of the most exacting and difficult tests of her personality and her patterns for meeting and adjusting herself to others. The association is intimate, intense, and continuous, and the usual avenues of escape from difficult situations are not easily available. For these women the outstanding husband-wife problem was one of struggle for domination. In this struggle all the techniques for resolving differences are used. The patterns attempted are many. There are instances in which the husband or wife is dominant and achieves superiority in decisions by force of personality. One decides, the other submits and accepts. Others develop a technique of open conflict which results in continuous tension. Still others arrive at a decision through conflict and accept the answer as the best way to proceed. In this struggle for domination one can see demonstrated the way in which husband and wife each work out their individual personality characteristics in terms of the other's. The wife's previously acquired pattern of projection, withdrawal, evasion, or acceptance or of facing each situation as it arises as a mature and well-adjusted person is presented in this human drama. Neither husband nor wife may be aware of what he or she is doing or of the techniques used.
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The way in which the woman's personality functions often determines what conflicts regarding money, sex, inlaws, and other matters arise. The woman has struggled all her life up to this time with parents, siblings, teachers, and vocational associates. She must maintain the integrity of her own ego. She must have some way of achieving a sense of importance in this relation as in others. The degree to which the husband recognizes this need and gives her status and a sense of significance may do much to enhance the entire marriage relation. Individual variation in the ability to make adjustments is also a factor in this relation. Some women make all the major adjustments, while in other cases there is a continuous conflict between husband and wife and a lack of adjustment in either. In one case the wife says: "If he wants to handle the money, let him. He can do a better job of it than I can, so why should he not be responsible?" In another case the wife is constantly complaining that her husband handles the money, that she has no voice as to what they spend and no knowledge of their financial situation. These examples show the way in which the wife's personality pattern functions in relation to her husband in money matters. In the second case, competition is shown between husband and wife for domination in family decisions. The husband-wife problem is predominantly a personality adjustment-conflict pattern. This pattern, in turn, colors, though it does not entirely determine, the adequacy of husband and wife in handling money, sex, child, in-law, and other phases of their personal, social, and professional life. The reader should not fail to see the significance of this fact. So often money, sex, in-law, and other problems are given more weight than they deserve as causal factors in
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family disorganization because they are considered in isolation and not as a function and reflection of the personality of the individual who meets these situations. There are of course situations, such as husbands becoming cantankerous, maids quitting, the loss of a job, or the failure of health, which are problems in themselves, however adequate the personality of the one who must meet them. But the important consideration is that such discrete causes of conflict be considered not apart from but in relation to personality factors. The following excerpts from the case of Mrs. Hamilton are cited to show the way in which family conflicts involve not only specific husband-wife adjustments but numerous other factors as well. They emphasize the interrelations of problems, their dependence upon the personality factor, their relevance to early conditioning, the potency of cultural influences, and the effect of all these factors on the marriage of two persons. Mrs. Hamilton has been married several years and has one young child. She is above average in socioeconomic background, intellectual attainments, and, so far as we are able to judge from test data, in personality adjustment. She and her husband have worked out a very satisfactory adjustment. Each assumes his or her own share of responsibility in carrying on the family life. Case of Mrs. Hamilton POSTCOLLEGE
Finances Financial depression causes postponement of pregnancy. Lack of funds for maid. Giving up own money first year of marriage. Reduction in husband's salary.
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81
Lack of money for recreational activities. Husband-wife relations Many arguments over religion. Disagreement over husband's resistance to having a wider group of friends. Conflict over sending child to Sunday school. Arguments over their calling on people. Conflict over wife's lack of orderliness about house. Many hurt feelings between them in first year of marriage. Sex adjustment difficult because husband was too inhibited and modest. Conflict over rush and strain. Irregularity of husband s hours causes differences and irritation. Parent-child relations Problem of the child's religion. Help wanted on how to prepare the child for the coming of a second baby. Relations with associates She and her fiancé were shy and "did not talk about things much" before marriage. Bashful with associates. Has become more critical of friends. Difficulty in keeping up relations with old friends because they bore her husband. Problem of answering the child's questions about the origin of babies causes conflict with neighbor. Attitude toward self Worries about not doing more "outside things." Was very uncertain and shy about getting married. Considers herself lax in budgeting her time. Is not very orderly. Clad that she does not have to suffer the hurt feelings she experienced when they lived in town with their families. Thinks she has too little ambition. Feels herself to be losing her pep. Feels bashful and shy with associates. Is becoming more critical of her friends.
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Fears death. Likes to avoid issues. Is an easygoing person. Was very inhibited and shy when going with husband. Was ignorant of what married life meant. Was sensitive and cried over the slightest things. Was never satisfied with her accomplishments while working. Felt exhausted at the end of each day. Was homesick for her college friends when she first began to work. Client's health [physician's medical report] Anemia; fatigue; lordosis; low arches; psoriasis; many filled and extracted teeth; marked tremor of hands; slight rectocele; slightly relaxed perineum; uterus lower in vaginal vault than normal; evidence of poor dental work; slightly retroposed uterus; several sties; headaches; slight nausea during pregnancy; teeth suffered during first pregnancy. Health of client's family Child's teeth very poor. Severe illness of child. Husband's chronic illness. Mother in serious accident. Mother-in-law's operation. Chronic illness of mother. Sex adjustment Sex adjustment not achieved for some time after marriage. Ignorant of sex. Did not discuss sexual matters with husband before marriage. Both husband and wife had many sex inhibitions. Many fumbling experiences in first two years. Religion Conflict about religious education of the child. Conflict with mother and mother-in-law about the religious education of the child. Vocation First vocational experience unhappy. Was in conflict with superiors.
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Felt that she never accomplished what she wanted to accomplish.
Recreation
Visits of friends overtaxing following illness. Conflict with husband over visiting and having people in the home. Social life bored her when she lived near her own family. Missed college life after she began working. Social contacts with friends were difficult because of her husband's attitude.
Relations with relatives
Too many family demands upon them when living in the same town with their families. Conflict with mother over child's not attending church. Could not have carried out her own child-training plan while living near her mother.
In-law relations
Too many demands and hurt feelings when living near her inlaws. Conflict with mother-in-law over not belonging to church. Conflict with mother-in-law over trying to "iron out" differences between her and her daughter. Could not have carried out her own child-training plan while living near her in-laws.
Client's evaluation of her husband
Hard to interest in social activities; quickly bored with people; his attitude toward religion a reaction against his strict upbringing; argues too much with his mother; is a shy, retiring person; contributes little in conversation; is not anxious for them to have another child; was not able to help wife with early sex adjustment; always gives vent to his feelings, regardless of consequences; has irregular work hours and does not call to notify his wife when he is to be late.
Education College gave her poor training for her vocation. Was given no sex information.
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Was given no help in the psychology of getting along with people. Homemaking skills and activities Getting housework done in orderly fashion and on time difficult. Hates dirty work of housekeeping. Lacked household skills and had a hard time adjusting herself to homemaking. Had great difficulty in organizing her time. Attitudes towards situations Sorry she cannot do more outside her home. Fears pregnancy. Feared she would not have children. Fears becoming too fat. Fears death of loved ones. Fuller discussions of financial problems and problems of sexual adjustment are included elsewhere in this chapter. Here they need be discussed only as a source of persistent and troublesome conflict between husband and wife. It does not seem strange that sexual adjustment in marriage ranked second in importance in the problems of husband-wife relations when one considers the difference in sex mores of men and women in our culture and the degree to which all discussions of sex and sex education have been taboo. Probably in no area of experience do husband and wife bring to marriage a greater difference in background, training, and attitude. An outstanding item in the wife's attitude towards and evaluation of her husband was her criticism of.his sex techniques, ideas, and attitudes. The important aspect of the money problem here, the third in rank, is its significance as a point of conflict between husband and wife. The differing experiences with money and differing patterns and standards of economic life of the husband and wife enter into conflicts in this area,
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as does the struggle for personal dominance. Women differ from one another in this respect, and a woman is often mated to a man whose personality and ideas about money are the antitheses of hers. In marriage there are two sets of values and two competing sets of desires for the things which money commands, as well as differences in ideas about handling money. The conflict between husband and wife over money is one of divergent personality strivings, values, and role concepts. It is not always money in itself that constitutes the problem, but rather the question of how money is to be spent and who is to make the decision. The fourth problem in husband-wife relations, personal habits, includes such seemingly trivial matters as punctuality at meals, picking up clothes, cleanliness of person, food idiosyncrasies, observing social conventions, formality and informality in the home, remembering anniversaries, arrangement of housekeeping activities, and being together or isolated during evenings at home. Conflict over such matters became closely tied with the struggle for domination, and any one of these items might become the point around which serious and lasting conflict arose. Each was apparently unable to tolerate differences in the other when the matter in question touched upon some emotionally inviolable area. Ash trays, for example, were to be in certain places only, not because the matter was important in itself but because it had become a little symbol of the total projection of the individual and had important meaning to him. There is no rule of thumb by which men and women may be taught in advance of marriage the key to the problem situations which will confront them after the step has been taken. However, there is perhaps no experience in which the individual has greater need for insight and adaptability than in marriage and the rearing of a family.
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Man and wife, regardless of the similarity of the cultural backgrounds from which they come, always bring to marriage enough difference in habits, attitudes, and beliefs to make compromise and adjustment necessary at many points if they are to get along with each other. Success in marriage involves not only a knowledge of the relevant facts but also an understanding of human nature and a philosophy of human relations. Regardless of how alike or different the husband and wife may be, there will always be adjustments and adaptations to be made, and the responsibility for making them falls upon the man and woman individually. That there will be conflict between them can be predicted with certainty. The nature and outcome of the conflict cannot always be determined. It is to be regretted that there was no opportunity to obtain comparable data from the husbands of these women. This lack, however, does not invalidate the material from the point of view of the insight it gives into the kinds of conflict which were important to the women themselves and their attitudes towards and feelings about the problems arising from their marriages. It is impossible to say whether or not the problems met by these women are typical of women in general or even of college women in general. Nor is it possible to say whether the educational advantages enjoyed by these women have contributed to the range and kind of problems they have met. Had they not gone to college, would their problems have been fewer and their adjustment to marriage more satisfactory? For those concerned with educational programs, such a question raises the important point that consideration should be given to the way in which higher education for women may affect their whole set of attitudes and consequently their ability to make a satisfactory adjust-
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ment to the myriad problems which confront them after marriage. In relation to all other problems, those involving specific husband-wife relations rank eighth and those relating to feelings of dissatisfaction toward the husband rank fifth. Thus the two together have an important position in relation to all other types of problem. In the husband-wife relation, however, difficulties arise not only from conflicts of personality and dissatisfaction with each other's personal habits and attitudes but also in many areas of decision, any one of which may occasion disagreement and discord. Such problem areas as parent-child relations, money, and getting along with associates involve mutual decisions of husband and wife at many points and provide occasions for acute disagreement between them. A husband, for example, may have the traditional idea that it is his responsibility to manage all the financial affairs of the family and that the less the wife knows about them the better. His wife, on the other hand, may have entered marriage with different ideas on the subject. At once there is set up the potentiality of continuous conflict unless some constructive adaptation to the situation is made by one or the other or both. In child rearing, to take another example, a wife's definite ideas of care and training may differ from those held by her husband. In such a case the husband may continually criticize and interfere with any form of training which the wife tries to put into practice, as shown in the following excerpt: One of the difficulties of the situation is that my husband and I now have definitely conflicting ideas. He feels that the only way to handle the problem with M. is to lock up all matches, to keep one box only for burning trash, and to have this locked in the pantry cupboard. Since matches are not necessary in the
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kitchen or the basement and the only other place in the house where they are used is for cigarettes, it will be possible to keep lighters and to keep them locked up. This was his idea about candy, and I tried awfully hard to put in into effect, but it didn't work and he knows it. My husband blames me for not having kept the candy away from the children, but I did try his method and it only helped to increase A.'s and M.'s violent desire for candy. Though in many instances problems of husband-wife relations were dealt with constructively and some kind of solution was reached, it is significant that 75 of the 78 married women in this study, or 96 percent, reported such problems in relation to the men they married. It may be noted also that the findings substantiate those of other studies in showing that the wife more often than the husband makes the greater adjustment in marriage. THE
PARENTS-IN-LAW
Consideration of the influence of parental relations upon the development and adult adjustments of these women indicates the nature of their continuing relation to their own parents after marriage. While it is true that in some cases parents raised objections to the man their daughter chose to marry, this objection was not a serious threat for most of the clients. After marriage, however, women still feel a certain obligation to their parental families and find it difficult to maintain the dual role of dependence in their old home and independence in their new one, and revolt and guilt are experienced in the attempt to reconcile the two. Often the parents of the wife or the husband try to continue their parental domination and direction of the life of their children after marriage. Too often neither husband nor wife fully realizes, when the offending parent is his own mother
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or father, that it is his responsibility to make the decisions and take the actions that will safeguard the integrity of the marriage. When the husband's parent is living in the home, it is easy for him to avoid an issue by letting things drift and leaving the matter to his wife. A second aspect of the in-law problem is the competition between the wife and the husband's mother. Until his marriage the mother is first in her son's life and assumes great responsibility for his welfare. Then, suddenly, another woman is first with him and assumes in most respects what was formerly the mother's role. The mother then feels that she is no longer needed, while the wife feels that her mother-in-law is a threat to her. This competitive situation seems to be met if the husband makes his wife feel that she is first in importance to him and persuades his mother to accept the fact that he is grown and independent and that his wife is an able peVson. The whole situation reflects the extent to which the mother has helped her son to mature and to become independent of family protection, while she, at the same time, has found other interests for herself. In this group of married women, 60 percent reported inlaw problems. Though few of them live in the same house with their parents or parents-in-law, many case studies reveal problems in this area. The following excerpt will illustrate: [Immediately following marriage, Mr. and Mrs. Downs went to live with Mr. Downs's mother.] This did not seem unreasonable to me as there were always three generations living together in my parents' home. I first became disturbed when I realized that his mother wanted us to pay board that amounted to my husband's entire income. I could not understand it, but I could have overlooked it and many things like it had Bill been different in his attitude. It was always what his mother wanted, never what I wanted. I realize now that he was unable to take
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a stand with his mother because she so completely dominated him, but then all I could feel was bitter hurt and disillusion with my marriage. Often there is economic necessity to explain the presence of in-laws in the home. The parents of husband and wife have not been able to become economically independent, they must live somewhere, the child or children cannot afford to maintain a separate home for them, and the only answer is for them to live in the same household. There is obvious need for a more sympathetic study of this problem in our American life and the development of means by which parents living in their children's homes may find interesting outlets for themselves and achieve a greater understanding of their role in their children's homes. Older people in the family need to feel important and should develop interests, outlets, and activities which will enhance the spirit and purpose of the family. PARENT-CHILD
RELATIONS
Parental overprotection and domination of children, lack of knowledge of child care and training, and general behavior problems of children are the categories of problem of most frequent occurrence in the parent-child situation. It is interesting to see the extent to which the women of this study repeated with their own children the patterns of parent-child relations familiar to them in their own parental homes. It is startling to note that in 100 percent of the cases the problems these women experienced with their own children were an almost exact duplication of the ones they reported in relation to their own parents. This is notably true in the case of the highest-ranking problem, overprotection and domination. Mrs. Gaines, in discussing her child, said: "There are so many things I am uncertain
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about in bringing up my child. I realize now that I have probably put too much stress on dressing, and lately I have not forced the situation as much as I did for awhile. Whenever I do so I feel remorseful over not being able to give M. all the time that should be hers." At other times in her history Mrs. Gaines spoke of being babied by her mother: "I hate to tell you, but I was over ten years old before I could comb my hair or dress myself." Lack of knowledge of child care and development was the problem ranking second. Among the many specific problems here, that of feeding children loomed large. The feeding situation occurs at least three times daily and offers opportunity for a sharp focusing of parental domination. Propaganda relating to the problem has been spread by child-training people, health publications, advertisers, and pediatricians, and the effort in general has been to get certain amounts and kinds of food into the child, almost to the exclusion of any consideration of the way the feeding situation itself is handled. The result has been to create an overanxiety about food and to give the feeding situation an amount of attention out of proportion to other aspects of the child's care and training. Concerning many aspects of child care and training these women had gained no adequate knowledge, either at home or at school or college. Behavior problems in the child are a reflection of unskillful management by the parents. They arise out of the parents' ignorance of the elementary basic needs of children and out of overindulgence and domination of the child. The range of child behavior problems in this group is similar to that found among other groups of parents. It is strange to find the "ignorance quotient" in child rearing so high in this group. Repetition of their parents' faults in this respect is indeed a reflection on education.
Chapter WOMEN'S COLLEGE
I
Three
NEEDS
AND
THE
CURRICULUM
N attempting to evaluate the adequacy of the college experience of the individual woman, it is convenient to classify college curricula according to some scheme by which their merits may be judged. In general, each college curriculum may be classified as belonging to one of three types: technical-professional, general-classical, or personalfunctional. Technical-professional curricula are organized to give training that will fit the graduate for the pursuit of a professional or technical calling. General-classical curricula aim at a broad general education which will pass on to the student the cultural heritage of the past. Such curricula have no particular vocational emphasis. Personalfunctional curricula include courses having a direct personal usefulness to the student and contribute to his adequate functioning as an individual. These classifications are not intended to be mutually exclusive. With these three general curriculum groupings in mind, it would seem fair to ask how any particular course of study representing four years of college training has met the purposes set up for the curriculum it represents and also how far it has prepared the student for life. Institutions whose function is to train dietitians, chem-
NEEDS
AND C U R R I C U L U M
93
ists, lawyers, agricultural scientists, physicians, or other experts expect to have their programs critically examined in terms of whether or not they do a first-class job in turning out graduates competent in these various fields. The same critical judgment may be made of curricula designed to contribute to the personal-functional aspects of the student's life or to give a broad general education. To put the matter another way, one may say that the measure of an institution's adequacy is the extent to which it does what it intends to do. Some will deny that the college is responsible for anything more than the training of scholars, doctors, or nurses or for training students in a broad classical sense. At the graduate level this argument may be tenable. For the thousands of undergraduate women enrolled in institutions of higher learning in this country, the argument, for a number of reasons, seems less defensible. Not the least important is the fact that the majority of these young women pursue a career for only a brief period, and then marry. Excerpts from two case histories, along with transcripts of the college records of the two young women represented, will illustrate the need for a more specific and individual delineation of educational objectives and a more discriminating sense of the interrelation of the various fields of knowledge and their functional, technical, and classical training possibilities. TRANSCRIPT OF CREDITS FOR MRS. R
(Women's College
Graduate)
SUBJECT
First Year
Hygiene Hygiene
GRADE
1st Semester
2d Semester
Ά Compi.
A
A
NEEDS
94
AND
English Composition Mathematics Art French Geology
CURRICULUM A A C Β A
A A Β Β A
Ά Compi. Β C A Β Β — A
Β C A Β A Β —
A Β Β A Β Β —
— Β Β A Β Β A
Β A C A
Β A Β A
Second. Year
Hygiene Biblical History Reading & Speaking Astronomy English Literature French Philosophy Psychology Third
Year
Biblical History Education English Literature French French History Psychology Fourth
Year
Education English Literature French Psychology Problems
Faced by Mrs. R
PRECOLLEGE PERIOD
Money Lack of ready money in the family. Relations with associates Sarcastic teacher upsetting to her.
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
95
A man teacher in grade school very frightening. Experience with strange teacher disturbing. Difficult relationships with boy-friend. Religion Some conflict over following religious observances insisted upon by the family. Client attended Sunday school with a little friend instead of going to the family's church and thus caused much conflict at home. Crises Death of maternal great-aunt. Death of maternal grandmother. Death of a favorite uncle. Death of maternal great-uncle. Reprimanded in high school because she used lipstick and rouge. Death of a favorite teacher. COLLEGE PERIOD
Money Unable to bear her share with friends because of little money. Lack of money for recreation. Paying for debt incurred—amount equal to three months' allowance. Relations with associates Conflict with boy-friend persisted well into college. Affair broken off with boy-friend by means of correspondence. Obliged to pay up debt, though another girl was partially responsible. Recreation Recreational activities were restricted because of lack of money. Education A course in Education was dull and boring. Crises Break with her boy-friend.
96
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
POSTCOLLEGE PERIOD
Money Low income at time of marriage. Has to ask husband for money, which she hates to do. Spending by a budget was an ordeal. Lack of money for recreation. Lack of social opportunities because of low income. Husband-wife relations Husband does not share her enthusiasm for sports. Husband and wife do not share in card games. Husband and wife have differing techniques for the one sport they have in common. Husband and wife in conflict over training children. Husband and wife disagree on many issues. Conflict with husband over his mother. No cooperation from the husband in household activities— every request refused. Husband and wife in conflict over social activities. Trouble between them because husband thinks she lacks interest. Lack of understanding between them. Lost faith in her husband when he failed to keep his word. Husband lacks thoughtfulness. Great conflict between them over her change from a compliant, yielding person to a more definite person. Husband expresses some jealousy of her. Conflict between them over his lack of self control with children. Husband's lack of concern over her illness. Husband rejected her affection unless her caresses led to intercourse. Much conflict over sex adjustment. Client's evaluation of husband Husband takes line of least resistance; is fundamentally inconsiderate; loses his temper over inanimate things; does not see her difficulties; is faultfinding; clings rigidly to his old patterns; does not discuss his social experiences and
NEEDS AND CURRICULUM
97
contacts; is impatient; can be very cross; lacks self-control; is easily bored; is critical and sarcastic; is old-fashioned in many of his ideas; is finicky over food; had no understanding of her slow sexual adjustment; very quick in his sex response; does not care about people and frequently refuses to carry out social plans; very impatient with the children; cannot express affection easily with wife or children; not a good sport in playing games; does not share her interests; found it difficult to break away from his mother; his failure to understand her point of view or take her side causes keen resentment in her; accepts her sacrifices without comment; belittles her; does not agree with her on many points; puts her in difficult and embarrassing position with friends; attention to her decreased after she became pregnant. Parent-child
relations
Children's problems a source of much difficulty between husband and wife. Children's social adjustment difficult. Problem of getting children to share their toys. Caring for a new baby. Authority for the children is divided between her and the maid. Problem of child's adjustment to school. Problem of children's allowances. Boys' fears. Getting the children to complete what they start. Daughter developing attention-getting device. Son feigns illness to get out of doing things. Is unable to volunteer in the community because of problems with her children. Children are too dependent on the home. Not successful in arguments with her children. Has difficulty in keeping certain promises to the children. Relations with
associates
Talked about and criticized by her friends. Has difficulty in getting her maid to understand her instructions.
98
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
Has always felt ill at ease with certain men. Friends sometimes misunderstand her. Had unpleasant experiences with friends who misconstrued her attitude towards them. Sexual adjustment Use of contraceptives annoying to her. Her sexual adjustment poor. Has made many attempts to improve her sexual adjustment but has failed. Intercourse not prepared for. She pretended satisfaction from intercourse when this was not true. A friend told her that women who were not sexually adjusted were likely to go insane. Religion Has no belief—is convinced of nothing. Occasionally feels the need of having a religion or religious philosophy. Is disgusted with the church near her. Recreation Has not enough time for recreation. Summer vacation plans are difficult to work out with children, house, and expense. Recreation limited because of lack of money. Cannot have as many outdoor outings as she would like because her husband is not interested in them. Relations with in-laws Adjustment with mother-in-law while living in her home very difficult. Mother-in-law refused to arrange satisfactory living quarters and made unreasonable financial demands on them while they were living with her. Mother-in-law and she differed over housekeeping techniques. Everything she did interfered with mother-in-law's plans. Mother-in-law very austere, rigid, and formal, different from anyone in her early experience. Mother-in-law penurious and dominating.
NEEDS
AND
99
CURRICULUM
Housekeeping Lack of preparation for housekeeping made it a serious problem to her. Cannot get the maid to do what is necessary or train her properly. Has difficulty in securing and keeping competent help. Has to do jobs for which her husband should be responsible. Some aspects of housekeeping distasteful to her. Is a poor household manager.
Crises
Death of favorite grandmother. Death of aunt. Death of husband's grandmother. Great conflict with mother-in-law. TRANSCRIPT OF CREDITS FOR MRS. Β
(Coeducational University Graduate) SUBJECT
GRADE
Rhetoric College Algebra Plane Trigonometry Medieval History Home Architecture Home Decoration Hygiene Exercise
C D D C C C D F
Rhetoric English Literature American History Entomology Exercise
D D D Β Β
Food and Nutrition Elementary Logic Sociology General Psychology
C C Β D
SUBJECT
General Chemistry Rural Sociology History of American Journalism English History
CRADE
Β C —
D
Selection and Preparation of Foods C Public Aspects of the Household C Design C Exercise Β History of American Journalism Economic Uses of Food Textiles Trees and Shrubs
Β C Β C
100
NEEDS
Economic Principles Economic Theory Educational Psychology Clothing Design Special Problems in Home Economics . . t American Government „ Exercise
AND C U R R I C U L U M Β Β C C C „ L. . A
Shakespeare C Eugenics C Development of Music A
Clothing Manufacture Β Home Administration C Child Care C Exercise A Education Courses , „ . , Educational Sociology ~ 1 W l , J Statistical Methods . , , Adolescence Junior High School Teachers Course in Home Economics
„ D N D ^ LC
T
C
Problems Faced by Mrs. Β PRECOLLEGE PERIOD
Money Client was given no training in spending; she had an unlimited checking account but was occasionally reproved by her father for spending too much. Relations with associates Had difficulty with a teacher who did not understand her. Was very dependent emotionally on a boy-friend. Her friends considered her too aggressive. Had a hard struggle to realize that she could not vent her temper on her friends as she did on her family. To her chagrin, a doctor to whom she was taken because of bed-wetting placed the blame on her. Experienced conflict with a trained nurse with whom she was isolated during a six-week illness. As a child, her adjustments to people were difficult. Disturbed during her high-school days when her friends began to leave her out of everything. This experience of rejection by her girl friends affected all her other social relations. Embarrassed by any attempt at petting when she dated. Sex Listened intently to older girls' conversations.
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
101
Both she and her mother were greatly inhibited when menstruation was explained. Mother very inhibited when telling her about reproduction, at her insistence. Could not believe what a friend told her about the birth process, which seemed dirty to her. Had an insatiable curiosity about sex. Recreation Played games only a little, because she felt inferior. Education Failed in third grade and had to repeat it. Had difficulty with languages in high school. Housekeeping Disliked to cook or help with cooking. Crises Crisis occasioned by her friends' turning against her and ostracizing her. During a severe illness was isolated with a nurse who immediately broke up her dependent behavior. Entrance to school made her desperately unhappy. COLLEGE PERIOD
Relations with associates College professors gave no help with her problems because of her apparent self-sufficiency. Attracted to a man but found him disappointing. Broke off affair with her high-school boy-friend. Experienced conflict over her own compulsion to obey rules, while many of her most interesting friends did not obey them. Experienced conflict with friends over smoking and telling dirty stories. Does not think she was ever accepted by men on first meeting them. Always had considerable reserve in petting and had conflicts with men because of this. Living in a sorority prevented her knowing some of the other girls she would have liked to know.
102
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
Found it difficult to get the girls in the sorority to realize the need for higher standards of living in the house. Had difficulty in adjusting to the girls in the sorority. A course on venereal diseases tended to make normal relationships with men more difficult. Believes that the respect of one's classmates was determined by the number of dates one had. Sex Had inadequate sex knowledge. Always wore her pajamas and robe in front of her friends. College course on venereal diseases was disturbing as well as inadequate. Always had a queer feeling about "necking." Although physically attracted she did not allow much kissing. Recreation Had no time to develop ability or interest in sports because of physical education requirements. Community activities Her college hindered rather than helped her interest in community affairs. Education Her academic work gave her a feeling of failure. Her academic work did not include the things she wanted to do. Counseling was done by a woman who policed rather than counseled. No faculty adviser helped her meet her problems. Had difficulty with nearly all her courses. Suffered because the physical set-up of the sororities was not sufficiently controlled by the college for the best interests of the students. Competition with men made college adjustment very difficult. Examinations were torture for her. Course in General Education was of no value to her. Flunked Economics. Her professors took no interest in helping her when she desperately needed help.
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
103
Hygiene course was inadequate and built up many fears. Physical education requirements prevented her developing an interest in sports. Mental Measurements course had no meaning or interest for her. Her course in the House was a total loss. College mathematics difficult for her. Rhetoric was a real problem. She was not ready for English Literature. Crises Terrific upset over break from family when she left home for college. POSTCOLLEGE PERIOD
Money Due to low income, her marriage was postponed until some savings had been accumulated. Her father's generosity with money caused need for some adjustment. Husband-wife relations Because of her fear of water she refuses to participate in sailing and water sports, though her husband very much desires her to take part. Her musical and dramatic interests are not shared by her husband. Husband and wife are not in agreement over indulging their children. Husband and she disagree over the importance of appearances. Her activities are not important to her husband. Husband was not enthusiastic over her pregnancy, when she felt he should be. Husband expects her to be dependent, and this causes difficulty. Always wants to discuss problems, while her husband never wants to discuss anything. Confides in her husband, but he does not confide in her. Early sex adjustment very unsatisfactory.
104
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
Husband and wife consider intercourse unsatisfactory unless both enjoy physical gratification. Parent-child relations Child is not always supervised adequately when with other children. Problem of amount of affection to give her child. Problem of child's religion, since she has shown so much interest in Sunday school. Problem of how to give sex education to her daughter. Difficult situation to handle in child's sex play. Child's masturbation. Cannot teach her child to sing, though she would like to. Problem of whether or not to allow daughter to choose her own clothes. Feeding problem with child. Immediately following her child's birth and at the present, problems of child-rearing make her feel helpless. Problem of disciplining four-year-old daughter who is becoming defiant. Child monopolizes conversation and mother questions what to do. Effort made to develop daughter's independence of her. Difficult to prevent child's becoming too dependent on her. Relations with associates Friends confide in her and she gives too much of herself and her time to them. Whenever she participates with a group of people she is forced to take responsibility. Conflict with associates over planning club activities. Close association with friends whose children play with hers makes for difficulties. Problem of a friend who accused her of being overconfident. At variance with friends over sex education of children. Thinks she always crawls in her relations with people because of early conditioning. People make her angry. Friends who lack decisiveness are annoying to her.
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
105
Always thinks friends are likely to be as sensitive as she is. Friends so often are "wet blankets" to her enthusiasm. Discussion by married friends of their sex problems is distressing to her. Her engagement was too long. Her fiancés reserve prevented her discussing many things with him. Restrictions with fiancé during long engagement caused later difficulties. Found it necessary to talk back to her superiors in order to hold to her aim. Sex Long engagement set up restrictions that later were detrimental to marriage. Could not discuss matters of sex with fiancé. Intercourse extremely painful in early marriage. Sex adjustment was very poor, though she tried hard to correct it. Inability to experience orgasm. Considers herself a prude about sex humor. Feels she has failed in sex adjustment in spite of her struggle to achieve it. Very inhibited in sex attitude. Sex problems with her child are difficult to meet, and she is anxious about further problems. Has been unable to use a satisfactory vocabulary in giving sex education to her child. Religion Has not joined a church because she does not want to be completely absorbed by an organization. Thinks if her child were attending another Sunday school she and her husband might attend that church. Does not accept the beliefs of the Sunday school her child is attending and wonders how far she is justified in giving her conflicting ideas. Recreation Has difficulty in getting her husband to participate in the kinds of recreation in which she is interested.
106
NEEDS
AND
CURRICULUM
Is not interested in sports but tries to simulate an interest because of her husband's interest. Finds her social activities restricted because her husband is not as sociable as she. Fear of water makes her reluctant to participate in swimming, sailing, and other water sports. Finds it difficult to become the "life of the party" in stunts and other entertainment devices at parties. Has missed having contacts with older friends as she did in the past. Is often miserable when she must attend sports events. Has lost interest in club work. When with a group is always pushed into a position of responsibility which she dislikes. Community activities Can never do any club work without immediately being given responsibilities. Loses interest in women's clubs because she considers them so poorly organized. Made an effort to plan program but met with great opposition from the other members of the group. Relations with in-laws Visits to mother-in-law very difficult. Thought her mother-in-law disapproved of her. The values and outlook on life of her husband's family are at complete variance with those of her own family. Cannot talk things out with her in-laws because they are so reticent. Her husband's family are all reticent and difficult to talk to. Education Is interested in taking courses to help her in parent-child relationships. Crises Sister's death made her realize what a great shock death is. Birth of daughter. First sex adjustment was very poor. Inability to make satisfactory sex adjustment. Disturbed over child's sex play.
N E E D S AND C U R R I C U L U M
107
DISCUSSION OF T H E COLLEGE EXPERIENCE O F M R S . R. A N D M R S . B . I N R E L A T I O N TO THEIR LIFE PROBLEMS
Let us examine the case of Mrs. R., who achieved a high scholastic record in Liberal Arts and was elected to membership in an honorary scholastic society. She attended only one university and upon graduation had completed regular courses with 20 A's, 20 B's, and 4 C's. In what way did she achieve this distinction as a good student and in what way did her college course contribute to the three curricular objectives described at the beginning of this chapter? She had ten semesters of English, ten semesters of French, four semesters of Psychology, and courses in Geology, Astronomy, Hygiene, Mathematics, History, Education, Biblical History, and Philosophy. Looking at this type of training from a technicalprofessional point of view, about the only thing that was open to this young woman was either graduate study or teaching, neither of which was of interest to her, since she planned to marry. From a general-cultural point of view, one can see many gaps in her curriculum. However, assuming that the range of fields of knowledge is considered adequate, we would have to know much about what was taught in these courses and how they were taught before we could say how they had contributed to a broadening of her general cultural understanding and to her appreciation of life. Almost any subject in the curriculum might be considered in a narrow academic way in relation to the curricular grouping where it logically falls, or, depending upon the way in which it is utilized and related to other fields of knowledge, may have value in all three curricular groupings.
108
N E E D S AND
CURRICULUM
From a personal-functional point of view, there may or may not have been anything of specific value in her college course. Both Psychology and Hygiene might presumably contribute in this area. Geology, Astronomy, Art, and possibly other subjects could have contributed much, but one's observation of the way in which these subjects are ordinarily taught would leave one much in doubt concerning their personal-functional value to our client. In the light of this four-year college experience, which could be duplicated by many women who attend colleges and universities throughout the country, let us now, in contrast, look at the precollege, college, and postcollege experiences of this young woman, including the kinds of problems and situations with which she was confronted. Let us then see what possible relation there may be between these problems and situations and the sort of higher education she obtained, either by her own choice or by direction of her parents or for some other reason. It is obvious that during her precollege period she had some difficulty in getting along with associates outside of her own family and was in conflict with her family over matters of religious observances. In the college period we find her having the same types of problem but fewer in relation to associates. Later, after graduation from college and after marrying, we find her still confronted with the same difficulties in making a good adjustment to associates. She is also having considerable conflict in relation to her husband, is projecting much of the blame for their difficult adjustment upon him, finds herself inadequate to meet her problems of child care and rearing, has made a very poor sex adjustment, is still in some conflict over religious practices, has difficulty with her in-laws, and feels herself inadequate as a housekeeper.
N E E D S AND C U R R I C U L U M
109
In the case of Mrs. B., a graduate of a large coeducational university, we find a person of lower scholastic standing, who graduated with a record of 2 A's, 10 B's, 23 C's, 9 D's, and 1 F. Her curriculum, if scrutinized from the point of view of its potential vocational value, would seem to be much broader in scope than that of Mrs. R. From a Liberal Arts point of view, about the only difference lies in the omission of courses in foreign languages. Looking at the courses taken by this woman, one would judge that she had obtained a rather adequate, broad foundation with which to meet her subsequent problems of adjustment, either vocationally or in marriage. Scrutiny of the precollege data indicates that she was having even more difficulties in getting along with associates than Mrs. R. experienced, was having difficulty with the whole question of sex, failed in one school grade, had difficulty with languages in high school, and met several crises that were definitely tied up with her personal adjustment. The same types of problem occur in the college period. Here there was much greater emphasis on difficulties in school work and a real crisis in breaking away from her parental home. In the postcollege period it can be seen that she is having difficulty with her husband, has many problems in child care and training, has trouble in making an adequate adjustment to her associates, and has sex difficulties and many other types of problem. To illustrate the apparent impotence of education in the life of this woman, one needs only to read the specific instances related to sex adjustment in the precollege and college periods, during engagement, and after marriage,
110
N E E D S AND
CURRICULUM
in order to see the utter failure of education to touch upon or clear up these situations. If training in this personal-social area is not the responsibility of the college, with whom, then, does this responsibility lie? Does the task rest with the high school? But the high-school students who go to college must meet certain academic requirements in order to gain entrance to college. Is it the parents' responsibility? If so, then whose task is it to give parents the training and help they need in order to do a more successful job? Most of the students in our colleges and universities become parents shortly after graduation. Whose function is it to give these men and women the kind of comprehensive training indicated by the three curriculum groupings? Should they rely upon supplementing what a contemporary college or university training does for them by information gained in extra-school agencies, extension classes, short courses, lectures, women's magazines, the radio, the church, fraternal societies, the Y.M.C.Α., the Boy Scouts, industrial and business plants, and the social service and remedial agencies in the community? THE
NEED
FOR
COORDINATION
INTEGRATION
OF
AND
CURRICULA
If it is true, as demonstrated by our data, that the individual's life and personality are a composite mixture of interrelated currents of expression at all levels of activitv, is it not also true that the same integrated and interrelated type of training is needed? And is it needed not only for women but also for men? However adequate a person may be as a dentist or a teacher of mathematics or in some other vocational capacity, it would seem that his training is a failure if he is
N E E D S AND C U R R I C U L U M
111
not prepared to make some contribution to the cultural and social level and outlook of society as a whole—or, at the very least, is prepared not to lower that level; if he is not equipped with some of the essentials which give him at least a fifty-fifty chance of becoming a well-adjusted member of society; and if he is not prepared to assume his responsibility in his family and in other primary group relationships. Just as technical-professional education fails if it does not include certain necessary aspects of the other two types of curricula, so general classical education and personalfunctional education may be said to fall short of what may be expected of them if they fail to include from the other curricula what is essential to a well-rounded program of higher education. We might go so far as to say that the belief we hold is that if higher education does not give the well-trained specialist the urge to participate, even if only in a small way, in the constructive development of our society and to learn to live his life well as an individual, then higher education is, to that extent, a failure. A description of what might constitute a realistic and practical frame of reference within which to consider curricula for women's education follows. D I R E C T I O N A L E M P H A S I S OF M E N ' S WOMEN'S EDUCATION
AND
Chart V, showing the direction of men's education, illustrates the fact that certain cultural-parental objectives are assigned to all men at birth. In our American culture, men are expected not only to assume a certain role in relation to the opposite sex but also to acquire some occupational proficiency which will lead to vocational or professional
N E E D S AND
112
CURRICULUM
success in a chosen field. Their career life is represented by a straight line. Their elementary and secondary school and college training emphasizes the same cultural and parental ideal of success and fulfillment in life that existed for them at birth. This ideal, together with his parental and community relationships, conditions a man's concept of himself as a member of our society and defines the role he is to fulfill throughout the whole period of his development. As he matures, marries or remains single, and finally reaches the age of retirement, these same goals and ambitions arc dominant. In his period of retirement from active CHART
V
DIRECTION OF M E N S Parental-cultural objective for boys at birth
$
EDUCATION
Elementary, secondaiy, college training emphasis
Living emphasis
Old-age goal
i
1
1
1>
> ι
M
Vocational training Vocational training Vocational advance· To have been vocaEconomic success in Economic success in ment tionally and ecochosen field chosen field Economic success in nomically successful chosen field
life and in his old age, his reflections are pleasant or unpleasant for the most part in terms of the degree to which he has achieved this cultural ideal or expectation. There is no conflict between the man's life emphasis and the cultural pattern set up for him, because there is absolute coincidence between his function throughout life and the cultural compulsion or expectations under which he lives. When, however, the average girl from Main Street or a metropolis goes to the average or above-average university, she is confronted with the task of selecting a course of study which has been made, tried, and tested by its adequacy in contributing to the successful technical and professional
NEEDS AND
CURRICULUM
113
training or the general classical training of men. Should she attend a woman's college, the curricular emphasis may look somewhat different—though not greatly so in some colleges —but the major emphasis in most women's colleges is on a general classical curriculum, with minor concern for the personal-functional or technical-professional aspects of education. Some exception to such a statement should be made in the case of a few women's colleges which are earnestly attempting to fit their curricula to the needs of women in today's world. In some colleges of home economics, the emphasis is more on the personal-functional side of living, but in many such colleges the technicalprofessional emphasis remains dominant. One would suppose that an institution designed primarily to offer education for women in American life might take as its starting point an analysis of the cultural framework within which woman's life is lived; that such an institution would base its curriculum upon an analysis of the needs and problems confronting women within our contemporary world. Instead, most colleges for women have either superimposed their program upon a pattern of education designed for men—a pattern in no way fitted to meet a woman's needs as a woman—or have established a program which merely parallels the pattern of education offered to women in the large state universities. Certainly if a woman were to be a lion-tamer, one would not limit her experience to learning to be a jockey. Yet such a course would be about as congruous as some of the prevailing efforts with reference to the organization of curricula for women. Now look, in Chart VI, at the line of direction which most girls' lives follow and the inconsistency between the cultural expectations and the educational discipline to which she must become oriented. At birth the cultural and
114
NEEDS AND
CURRICULUM
family expectation is that the girl will eventually marry and have a home and family. All her conditioning before she enters school and during her elementary and secondary school experience follows this same line of emphasis, and she becomes both consciously and unconsciously aware of her ultimate goal in life. Throughout her elementary-school, secondary-school, and college days she carries this culturalCHART
VI
DIRECTION OF WOMENS EDUCATION AS IT IS FOR MOST INDIVIDUALS Parental-cultural objective for girls at birth
Elementary, secondary, college training emphasis
1—5 Marriage, home, family
»
Vocational training Career achievement Job speciali2ation
Living emphasis
M>
J—I
Marriage, home, family
Old-age goal
i
>
)
To have fulfilled cultural expectations: marriage, home, family
family objective, but she must take a curriculum, particularly in college, which amounts to a technical-professional or general cultural training. These courses emphasize a masculine goal: vocational training, career achievement, job specialization. Such a condition may not be particularly upsetting in view of the fact that many women who attend college today expect to participate in a wider sphere of life than that of the family and the home. Following graduation from college, the girl, if she does not marry immediately, may begin with a great deal of interest and zest what should rightly be called interim gainful employment. Usually, however, she still carries along with her the cultural ideal and objective that sooner or later she will achieve marriage, a home, and a family. As life moves on, she may actively pursue a career,
NEEDS AND CURRICULUM
115
even until old age; or she may be obliged to resign herself unwillingly to a career though she would prefer the role of wife and mother. In either case it is likely that she will never entirely lose the hope that some day she will achieve the role which our culture has so explicitly set for her. Even in old age she may experience frustration because she has not been able to fulfill this ideal. Throughout her entire development there may be frustration and conflict over the lack of coincidence between what she has the urge and desire to do and what she must tentatively continue to do and be. This sequence with its attendant conflicts is the usual pattern of life of the greater number of average American girls from average homes and communities who go to almost any college or university in any part of the United States. DIRECTIONAL
E M P H A S I S OF EDUCATION
WOMENS
Now let us look at women's life development as it actually is. In the preceding discussion we have not lost sight of the fact that many American college women never marry, and that some continue to pursue a career by choice; and that many are successfully carrying on with both a career and marriage. The decision as to the best way or combination of ways to live one's life as a woman in our American culture is not an issue here. Our interest centers upon the confusion as to the accepted cultural role assigned to women. It presents a complex and complicated situation which has to be met by every woman, as well as by those responsible for directing institutions of higher learning which have the task of educating women. If one follows the directional line of women's development from birth to old age, in Chart VII, the complexity of
116
N E E D S AND
CURRICULUM
this line can be seen at a glance. Its directional core is constant, but the line itself has many fluctuating and unpredictable variations. The girl begins life, as has been pointed out, under the cultural-parental expectation that fulfillment in life for her means marriage, a home, and a family. There is a differentiation of function in the roles which culture assigns to men and women at this point. Those who see differentiation of function as a matter of superiority or inferiority of role sadly confuse the meaning of such differentiation. Such a misunderstanding often leads to unfortunate results because those who hold such views make abortive attempts to bring into harmony what is already harmonious or to correct what is obviously incongruous. During the greater part of the girl's elementary and secondary schooling and college experience she equips herself for some sort of interim vocational work, usually with the constant idea that marriage, a home, and a family will eventually be achieved. She may achieve this goal during the developmental phase of her life, but if she does not she will probably enter upon some gainful employment, which in most cases will last only a short time, but in some cases will occupy her for the rest of her active life. If, against her wishes, she is gradually obliged to accept her employed role as permanent, she must resolve in other directions her sense of the frustration to the fulfillment of her life. Other women, who begin a job with the expectation that their role as employed women is more or less permanent, may find that role interrupted at any time by marriage. Again, after some years of marriage such a woman may be obliged, as a result of a crisis of one kind or another, to train herself for reëntrance into some vocational field, possibly at an age when she finds it difficult to secure employment. Even such work may be a temporary affair if she has
'S S· 3 e sá ®S fill Ä-8
118
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taken it up because she has been widowed, since remarriage is always a possibility. Again, many a woman who marries during or immediately following the college period may later find herself confronted with the necessity of entering some field of gainful employment, only to learn that her college education of ten years earlier is of little value from this point of view. Retraining is then necessary, and she may also find it difficult to enter employment for the first time at her age, especially at the higher levels of remuneration. These are a few of the many dilemmas and confused issues that enter into the life role of women and into the problem of educating women to meet such a life role.
Chapter E D U C A T I O N
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is so much a complete unity or whole that to treat life-history data exclusively by the analytical and statistical method tends, in the opinion of the investigators, to destroy the essential revelations of the material, to distort the findings, and to reduce the living, functioning human being to a numerical value. They were unwilling, therefore, to limit their treatment of the material to the analysis of problem situations which yielded the findings discussed in the chapter on "Everyday Problems of Women." The present chapter is concerned instead with synthesis and generalization, and ten generalizations derived from a study of the individual life patterns and experiences of the one hundred women are presented and discussed. It is the belief of the investigators that these ten generalizations may very profitably be considered in relation to women's education. Unquestionably, specific problem situations are of considerable consequence in the individual life and must be faced realistically and with such resourcefulness as the individual can command. Nevertheless, the investigators are confident that if educators would make consistent application of these ten generalizations to the education of women, college graduates would need to HE INDIVIDUAL PERSONALITY
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expend far less effort in the attempt to overcome such problems in their lives. The ten generalizations follow: 1. Each woman meets life according to her own individual pattern. 2. The individual way of patterning life seems to persist throughout life. 3. The parent-child relation is the most potent of all influences outside the organism in shaping personality. 4. All aspects of the individual's life are interrelated. 5. Most situations are recurrent within the life span of the individual. 6. As problem situations recur, there is need for repeated education and reorientation appropriate to the stage of development reached by the individual. 7. Society determines the form of life situations and sets up certain specific expectations for women which are confused or clear in varying degrees. 8. Women's role in our society is complicated, unclarified, and shifting. 9. To understand women at any one stage, an understanding of their total development up to that time is necessary. 10. Women make an active attack on their problems, the degree of effectiveness being determined by their insight and resourcefulness. These generalizations will be discussed in turn.
1. Each woman meets life according to her own individual pattern. 2. The individual way of patterning life seems to persist throughout life. Individual differences have been discussed by educators for many years, yet the evidence that this concept, so clearly verbalized, has been realistically applied in educational practice is not at all convincing. Undoubtedly the general recognition, in education, of
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the physical and intellectual differences of individuals, at least those which mark extremes of defect or gift, has been a real step forward. But individuals differ in another way, of which education has not yet taken cognizance. Evidence from this study and other studies in the same general field and from clinical experience indicates that each woman develops a pattern of functioning peculiar to herself. Her entire personality is integrated with this pattern. Her relations with other people are affected by and help to build this particular way of life for her. Every situation with which she is confronted is worked out in terms of this individual pattern. To individual differences in physical characteristics and intellectual capacity must be added, therefore, individual differences in ways of behaving. This individual pattern of behavior is an integrated whole, made up of native endowment, cultural demands, social relations, and the residue of all past experiences. Though it is modifiable within wide limits, this pattern seems to remain consistent in the life of the individual and to persist throughout life. The following case histories will help to illustrate and clarify these points. The Case of Mrs. Baer
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(A woman who meets crises well) "I want you to help mefindsome way to counteract what may be happening to Jane," Mrs. Baer said. "I became disturbed because the children in the neighborhood act as though she were 1 In order to safeguard the identity of case material, all personal and place names have been altered. Since the majority of the cases contained identical types of problem situations, substitutions have been made from a number of different histories in the presentation of each single case. In principle, each case is valid in presenting the life pattern and problems of the individual, while in fact, source material has been substituted from the lives of other women.
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queer, refuse to play with her, or ask questions which cause her to become aware of her difficulty. "Jane is four years old and has to wear a corrective brace to straighten her leg. The doctor assures me it will be necessary for only a few years. She accepts the brace beautifully but when the children act as they do I am concerned over the attitudes she is bound to develop." Mrs. Baer had come to the Advisory Service with two definite problems of child training on which she wanted help. Besides the problem of the brace, the child presented a recurring problem of bed-wetting which was complicated by their living with Mr. Baer's mother, who criticized her daughter-in-law for her failure to train the child properly. This criticism seemed more disturbing to Mrs. Baer than the bed-wetting, which she did not consider as serious as the mother-in-law insisted it was. In a direct, unself-conscious, concise manner, the young woman stated her reasons for coming. She was a tall woman in her late twenties, somewhat rangy in appearance, with bobbed hair, a fresh, clear complexion and a smiling expression that made her face quite pretty. The clothes she wore were shabby and outmodeçl, but they apparently affected her little. She carried herself'with an easy grace. After stating her problems, Mrs. Baer was told of the study of college women in progress. She listened to the request for cooperation and agreed enthusiastically to give her life history as well as to discuss her ideas of women's education. Because of their cost, she had given up most recreational activities, but she said this particular opportunity seemed to offer fun and to require no expenditure of money except for bus fare. At the same time she would feel she was contributing to something of an educational nature. Mrs. Baer had hoped to keep up with work of this kind after marriage, but owing to her circumstances she had found it impossible. Obviously she anticipated the study with pleasure. As the months progressed, Mrs. Baer's enthusiasm for the project never waned. The long distance that she traveled from her suburban home in no way acted as a deterrent, though the trip took more than an hour. Occasionally she took advantage
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of a friend's driving into the city. Frequently she said, "These visits are just like a glimpse into another world." Whenever she was thanked for her cooperation, the answer always came back laughingly, "Don't thank me, because you may not know it but this is my chief form of entertainment." When she came for appointments, Mrs. Baer always removed her wraps and settled herself for the afternoon. She usually lingered sociably over the tea that was served at the end of each interview. This young woman's fortunes were followed for a period of five years. Throughout this time she maintained a consistent and direct pattern of life for herself irrespective of the changes that occurred in her circumstances. Her role as wife and mother seemed to be clear-cut and free of conflict. Mrs. Baer appeared to be realizing the major ambition of her life even though the material aspects of her home left much to be desired. In those circumstances that were impossible to change she made adjustments without resentment, such as fitting the family needs to a negligible income and accepting the necessity of living with the mother-in-law. Anything that could be modified she always tackled directly, as indicated by her efforts to overcome Jane's bed-wetting and to forestall a difficult attitude over the leg brace. Mrs. Baer hoped to give Jane every possible advantage in spite of the adverse circumstances of their home. Having to live with his parents because Mr. Baer's income was reduced to almost nothing made it nearly impossible to do what they wished to do for their child. Recognizing this fact, the young mother was determined to exert every effort not to let the youngster be cheated of the things she considered important. Early in the depression, her husband's mother and father hospitably offered to share their home. This offer was accepted gladly, and the young couple did everything possible to make for satisfactory living arrangements. Mrs. Baer took over the housekeeping as agreed to by all, and she quite enjoyed doing so. The mother-in-law had recently suffered a heart attack, but even so she kept a watchful eye on the younger woman's housekeeping. With improved health, the older woman increased her
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social activities and seemed glad enough to leave the housework still in her daughter-in-law's hands. However, she became increasingly dictatorial about the home, and found much fault with the way things were done, even though she grudgingly agreed that the house was well kept. Young Mrs. Baer found herself becoming quite disturbed by the older woman's criticism, but she said, "Jack and I have talked it over and even though he agrees that she is difficult we both think the best thing is to grin and bear her." She frequently expressed appreciation for the in-laws' generosity in allowing the younger family to live with them. Mr. Baer then lost his job. He began to work much of the time on a small mechanical invention which held his interest and kept him from becoming too discouraged during the long period without work, according to his wife. He made efforts to obtain employment but this seemed practically impossible to find, so he turned his attention to the invention that had possibilities for future returns. She recognized the fact that her husband was quite helplessly under his mother's dominance, especially as they were so greatly in need of the older people's financial aid, but she was perfectly sure that his sympathies were with her and that whenever an opportunity came they would move into a home of their own. "I try very hard to prevent open conflict with my mother-inlaw," she said, "as it is always extremely disturbing both to my husband and to his father, whom I like." Occasionally Mrs. Baer found it absolutely necessary to have a little money to buy certain essentials for herself or for the little girl's wardrobe, and her husband generally managed to supply it. Whenever she asked him where the money came from, he seemed to resent her questioning. Whether it was supplied to him by his father or whether he had some slight source of income of which she did not know, she was unable to say. She finally realized that money was a sore spot with her husband and that matters ran more smoothly between them when she in no way inquired into financial arrangements. Even in the years when their income increased appreciably,
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Mrs. Baer was never able to discuss frankly with her husband the source and status of their income, nor was she able to do so throughout the years she was known at the Advisory Service. Mr. Baer finally obtained work in an automobile factory at twenty dollars a week, owing to a slight pick-up in business and also to their intensified desire to get out of his parents' home. In spite of the fact that the income was hardly adequate to support a family of three, the Baers were determined to live on it. The wife's first idea was that living quarters should be obtained in a neighborhood near enough to the factory so that her husband would not have the expense of carfare. She determined that their rent should not exceed a quarter of their income, and set out to comb the vicinity of her husband's work. The prospects were quite discouraging, especially in comparison with her in-laws' attractive home, but the desire to be alone was strong, and eventually Mrs. Baer found a small house at exactly the rent she had planned to pay. With much rejoicing, they moved. Since both believed they had little in common with the neighbors, they turned their interests and activities to putting the house in good condition. Almost no money could be spent on it, but plenty of ingenuity and physical effort produced a very cozy and pleasant effect in the home. Again Mr. Baer refused to discuss his financial circumstances with his wife, and though occasionally she found herself inwardly resenting it, it seemed wise not to press the issue. Mrs. Baer frequently referred to the fact that all her life from childhood on there had been terrific arguments in her parents' home over money. She had vowed time and again that when she married she would never permit money to be a major source of conflict. With ten dollars of the weekly income the family was fed and extras such as newspapers, shoestrings, and thread were purchased. Mrs. Baer seemed so happy to be in her own home that never once did she express a regret over their limitations as compared with the more comfortable physical surroundings of her in-laws' home. She found it was possible to prepare and serve simple but adequate meals after practicing and after reading
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with great care the newspaper and magazine articles on budget meals. Recreation outside the home continued to be impossible for the Baers except when the wife's sister-in-law occasionally took Jane into her home for an afternoon or a day. It was on these occasions that Mrs. Baer was able to visit the Advisory Service. In searching for some means of entertainment, the young couple devised a plan of recreation which involved no expenditure of money. A week-end night was selected as "date night," and immediately following dinner the dishes were stacked and left to be washed the following day. Mr. and Mrs. Baer both dressed as though in preparation for going out, but instead spent the evening playing one of their favorite games, such as bridge or checkers. Towards the end of the evening they had coffee or tea and some kind of special cookies or cake that had been prepared earlier in the day. She laughed and said that this might not be entertainment for others but it had helped them gain a festive feeling and considerable refreshment. Both were eager to have more children, the wife particularly so. They realized that it probably would be years before the husband's income would be increased to any appreciable extent, and that in order to space their family as they would like a second pregnancy would have to be undertaken on a very slim margin. When Mr. Baer's income was increased to twenty-five dollars a week they went ahead with the pregnancy. The wife felt some concern over paying the medical and hospital fees necessary to having a baby, but her husband, as usual, insisted that she leave this worry to him. "This was one time," she laughingly said, "when I was glad to relinquish any responsibility for our financial affairs." Throughout her pregnancy Mrs. Baer remained well and active. Her husband gave an increasing amount of cooperation in the home. However, towards the end of the pregnancy he began to develop a cantankerous and sullen attitude which was not usual with him. The wife was disturbed, as this kind of behavior had been in evidence during the former pregnancy. According to her, his difficult disposition could be due to one of two things or probably both: that sex relations had to be discontinued in the
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sixth month of pregnancy, and that her husband had a certain feeling of inadequacy because of his inability to share the experience of actually having the baby. Mrs. Baer said that she worried quite a little over his unpleasant attitude but since it did not occur at any other time she felt that she must accept this with as little anxiety as possible. However, the situation was greatly complicated by the fact that her own mother and father came more frequently during her pregnancy than at other times in order to help her. They became extremely disturbed over the son-in-law's unpleasantness and their disapproval set up further antagonism on his part. The difficulty was cleared up only by her great effort. She faced her husband with the effect his behavior was having on his relationship to her parents and explained as gently as possible to her own parents that this was her affair to manage. Since her husband's disposition was ordinarily good, she did not believe this reaction of his during her pregnancies was indicative of a serious personality problem. She could not help but have a slight fear that this would recur in the future. As her second pregnancy advanced, Mr. Baer increased his usual amount of helpful cooperation in the home. He not only did the heavy cleaning but also took over the washing of the clothes. She laughed and said that he had never resented doing such things and apparently assumed that all husbands undertook them when the need arose. After the first baby was born Mr. Baer did the laundering until his wife was able to take it over. She felt sure that this would be the case upon the arrival of the second baby. Shortly after the birth of Mary, the second daughter, Mr. Baer's income took a slight upturn, with an increase of five dollars a week. One of the first things Mrs. Baer did afterwards was to buy a dress, since she had been unable to get anything new either during or some time before her second pregnancy. She remarked, "I knew that the hospital bills were paid, so I did not question Jack closely about it as his attitude remains the same on financial matters." Mrs. Baer said that after this increase in income she joined a sewing group organized in her college club. In this activity she
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found much satisfaction. Certain afternoons were arranged when her mother could come into the city and look after the youngsters. Occasionally she and a friend alternated in keeping each other's children for the afternoon. The sewing club meant no additional expense except carfare. Mrs. Baer was confronted with another problem when Jane went to kindergarten. The child's first adjustment was difficult because she had been kept so closely at home and had not been allowed to play with the neighbor children, and the process of adjusting to a group of youngsters produced a marked emotional reaction. Mrs. Baer again asked for help, saying that she wanted to do the best for Jane and did not want unpleasant situations to leave lingering effects on the child. As usual, the mother followed the suggestions made by the service. Getting Jane to school and back became another problem, but an arrangement was made with a neighbor boy to take her back and forth for ten cents a week. Mr. Baer's invention did not prove successful, but as a result of his work on it he began to develop other mechanical devices. He spent all his free hours at home in his workshop and was always perfectly willing to have either one or both of the little girls working around with him. Whenever he had his meals late his wife prepared them and when he had finished he always cleared away and washed his own dishes. Mrs. Baer said she did not know what she would have done had her husband been the kind of man who demanded a great deal of attention and gave no assistance in return. She felt that in their home they had a truly cooperative arrangement. As time went on, the Baers saw less and less of his parents, though friendly relations had been reestablished. No financial aid came from them, as far as the wife knows, but visits were exchanged and both parents-in-law seemed to feel real affection for their son's family. However, Mrs. Baer was always somewhat conscious of a social barrier that her husband's people put between them and her. Her husband's brother was married to a girl holding a social position of some importance. Mrs. Baer was fond of this girl but
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was always aware that something prevented their becoming really good friends. She frequently laughed and said, "I am sure the social position of my own family is quite comparable to that of my husband's, so it does not really disturb me, but it does seem foolish that such a barrier should exist. It is probably chiefly due to the fact that our own economic status is far lower than that of my husband's brother and his wife." In discussing her parental family, Mrs. Baer said that she had grown up as one of two children, a brother and herself. They had always lived in a city, but there had been three moves in her early life which had necessitated marked adjustments. One had come about the time she was ready to enter school, the second during her early adolescence, and the third in her last year in high school. These moves made it very difficult for her to make satisfactory social adjustments, for she was a rather timid, shy, retiring youngster. She and her brother played together as children and were quite congenial. She realized that the parental discord probably drew them closer together. She knew that her mother and father were very unhappily married. Throughout her childhood she was constantly aware of quarreling and bickering between them. These conflicts became so acute at one time that she and her brother were sure the parents would get a divorce. They were greatly alarmed and suffered intensely until they were fairly sure that the divorce would not take place. However, when the mother and father quarreled there was always anxiety for fear it might precipitate a separation. "I made a vow early in my childhood," she said, "that my own married life would never be like that of my parents and that no matter what happened I would not quarrel. I believe I have kept it and that we have as little quarreling in our family as any two people could possibly have." She went on to say that probably the chief source of conflict in her parents' home was money. The mother was inclined to extravagance and the father to feel that money should be put aside for family security. The father insisted upon handling the money, which greatly angered the mother. Her smoldering resentment flared up frequently.
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"My parents' home was that of the usual conservative, average, Protestant family," said Mrs. Baer. "My mother and father demanded certain standards of behavior that were socially acceptable in their community. They had no particularly strong convictions, except that they should do what was expected of them as parents. W e could not sew or skate on Sunday. As we grew older we were forbidden to smoke or drink—not because my parents thought these things were wrong, but because they were considered wrong by the majority of other parents." Mrs. Baer said she became more thoroughly convinced of the truth of this observation after she and her brother were both married, when her parents began to do exactly the things they had always forbidden the children to do, making it evident that their prohibitions had been a matter of conformity rather than conviction. "Both my mother and father go with a very fast modern crowd now," she said, "many of them young people of my own age. It was this same group that my parents made me avoid in my adolescent years." She thought the relation between her and her parents was very friendly. "Mother and Dad have given us some assistance," she said, "not in actual money but in material things, particularly for the children. At times Mother has helped by staying with the children so I might have some free time." She had always been on good terms with her parents. She recalls little or no discipline except that her father sometimes attempted to whip her and her brother when they had pushed him to the limit of his endurance, but they usually ran away from him. Her parents expressed very little affection for them. She sorely missed some demonstration of their affection and as a consequence has made a conscious effort to show much affection for her own children, for she believes it is essential to them. There was a certain seclusiveness in her parental home and an absence of large family gatherings, apparently because her father and mother had had some difficulties with their in-laws and preferred to keep to themselves in their family life. Their circumstances were similar to those of the people
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around them, she believes. No great stress was laid on keeping up with the Joneses. Her early ambitions were for travel and material possessions, but she always hoped and expected that she would marry. She was never particularly well as a child, but suffered from a tendency to prolonged colds and digestive disturbances. She knew that her parents felt some anxiety about her health. She never minded being ill because she enjoyed the special treatment given her at such times and because of her great fondness for the family physician. From her entrance to school at six years on through the grades, there was never a time when her school experiences were unpleasant. She liked all her teachers. Her work was evidently up to standard and quite acceptable in the eyes of both her teachers and her family. Her playmates were few, whether because she was slow in making social adaptations or because there were few children living in the neighborhood, she does not recall. Ill-health may also have been a factor. When the family moved, early in her adolescence, she entered her first period of really happy relations with friends. Until then her playmates had been of a casual kind. This last move marked a decided improvement in the social and economic status of her parents. She was particularly happy in the companionship of a special girl-friend. Her achievement in high school was all that she desired. Throughout these four years she associated almost entirely with girls, for though she was aware of the boys in school and had felt an interest in them as early as ten years of age, she was never noticed by any of them. She found an outlet for her heterosexual interests in a kind of hero worship of older boys. During her last year in high school her parents made a third move which had an extremely unhappy effect on her social participation. The school into which she went had many social groups already formed, and breaking into any of them proved to be extremely difficult. Socially she felt out of things during the entire year. Like many of her acquaintances, she had never for a moment
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considered going to college. To her amazement, her father and mother insisted that going to college was an experience she should have. Quite reluctantly, and only under great pressure from them, did she enroll in a small coeducational college. She had been overwhelmed by large city high schools, and found herself much more attracted to the small college setup. Entrance into college marked the beginning of four of the happiest years of her life. She found herself having dates steadily, a fact that was hard for her to understand, for she had not been popular before. She was asked to join a sorority, and did so, and her pleasure in it was great. The Liberal Arts course that she chose included the usual subjects of a language major. As she looked back over her college experience she thought the actual subject matter and studying were incidental to the full life she led at college. For the first time she was really living happily and having experiences of vital importance to herself. At this time she experienced some conflict over the question of petting. A part of her mother's training, along with the nosmoking, no-drinking ideal, was a strict prohibition of petting. "If she had just once sat down with me and helped me to gain some understanding of the kinds of physical relations that might develop with young people," she said, "I could have worked out a much more intelligent procedure. Mother occasionally gave me some articles to read on the evils of kissing. Yes, she was indeed old-fashioned. My children will know about life from me as early as they show interest and until they no longer need help from me." On another occasion she said, "Perhaps my family gave me more of my ideals than I realized. It seems to me that I just drifted, and yet I must have had hidden patterns that guided me, because I always behaved." She did not have the usual serious love affairs during college because "it was too much fun going with a lot of different people even to think about getting engaged." She had always had great admiration for her husband, who seemed to be a far more sophisticated person than she had ever been or could ever hope to be. Their friends were different, but
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they did have in common certain recreational interests which drew them together in her senior year. She had one and only one plan for her life at this time. She intended to work only long enough to allow her sweetheart time to establish himself in business, then to give up her work, marry, and establish her own home. This ambition was the major and persisting one of her life. She taught one year, feeling herself not too well prepared despite the fact that she taught French, the subject of her major. She realizes now that she was more interested in her approaching marriage than in her job, and undoubtedly gave only halfhearted attention to it. With the social group of which she might have become a part there resulted some unpleasantness owing to her detachment and refusal to become one of them. It was with relief that she completed the school year. She put her vocational experience behind her with the hope that it would never be necessary to take it up again. At the time of their marriage, Mr. Baer was a well-paid businessman, and they had ample money to set up housekeeping in an attractive apartment in a good neighborhood and to enjoy some of the expensive hobbies of her husband and his friends. It was her husband who felt that she must find time hanging heavy on her hands and who insisted that she take up some kind of work in order to escape boredom. His insistence greatly disturbed her, for she did not want to work outside the home and felt she was perfectly able to keep herself occupied and contented with the housekeeping activities and social contacts with friends she had known in college. Finally, at her husband's insistence, she did special tutoring, but always felt some resentment towards him because of it. It was with great relief that she realized, after several months of work, that she was pregnant and that her husband would no longer insist upon her having an interest outside the home. "Our early marriage adjustment was probably similar to that of most young married people," she said. "There were many tears and quarrels—none of any particularly serious or lasting nature, but I became more and more determined as the months passed that I would not allow our marriage to fall into the habit
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of quarreling that I had seen in my parent's family." Mrs. Baer believes that her relation with her husband is as smooth as it is possible for two people to have achieved. Mr. Baer had been an indulged child of well-to-do parents. He now recognizes that he had entirely too many privileges. It was difficult for him to give them up without a struggle. As long as he had money he was extremely generous with his wife. However, the feeling that he should be wholly responsible for the family money and should not in any way be interfered with by his wife was evident in early marriage and has continued. This attitude Mrs. Baer believes she must accept. The Baers have always allowed each other much freedom. Each goes his own way in recreational interests. The only thing she ever objected to was Mr. Baer's interest in racing automobiles. The expense of this hobby was not as disturbing to her as the danger involved. However, with the loss of his income this hobby was automatically dropped. They have never actively participated in church affairs although they have sent the children to Sunday school and the mother is now teaching a Sunday school class. Mrs. Baer says, "I have a definite philosophy of life and quite specific ideals, although I would not say that they are a part of any marked religious feeling." As to their sex adjustment, Mrs. Baer says it has been as satisfactory as she believes it would be possible for any couple to have. Prior to marriage her husband went to a physician and not only got contraceptive advice but also received some very sound instruction in working out sex relations that would be satisfactory both to himself and to his wife. She herself was quite ignorant of sexual matters, but since her husband was willing and eager to obtain help regarding this aspect of their marriage they have had little difficulty. Their children were definitely planned for and spaced as desired. Mrs. Baer would like another child but her husband is convinced that because of their low income no more children should be considered. Her earlv sex education she said was most inadequate. Some rather warped "facts of life" were gleaned from older playmates
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while she was in junior high school. These were quite disturbing to her. Shortly before the onset of menstruation her mother discussed this function with her, but chiefly in terms of prohibiting bathing and certain other activities. In college she got her greatest help from a course in child development in which much material on marital adjustment was included. She gleaned help in health matters in the same way. She had always been a poor eater and attributed her early digestive disturbances in part to this fact. In listening to home economics students who were greatly concerned with nutrition and dietetics, she picked up valuable information and as a result improved her own health habits. Since then she has been in much better health. "Isn't it strange," she said, "that with my chief interests centering in the home and my liking for homemaking activities, I was violently opposed to home economics as it was taught in college? I feel sure that my dislike of it was due to the excessive amount of science I should have been forced to take had I majored in that field. I certainly did not want to teach home economics." During the period of contact with the service, Mrs. Baer had a rather serious illness. Her husband as usual increased his cooperation in the home, the children took their parts, even though they were still quite young, and though the mother was in bed for some time no additional help was brought into the home. The laundress who had been employed when their income was increased did the heavy cleaning. Mrs. Baer met this illness in her characteristic manner, facing it and doing what was necessary in order to regain her health. Throughout the five years of contact with the service, this consistent pattern of facing every situation with honesty and candor and planning a course of action that usually proved effective was evident. Whenever she met some difficulty that could not be overcome, such as her husband's attitude towards money, their low income, and the necessity of living with her mother-in-law, Mrs. Baer made the most intelligent adjustment possible. She was always willing to seek help when she recognized that she needed it but gave little evidence of "leaning" on people.
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She appeared to meet the exigencies of her life and manage them insofar as she was capable of doing. She also seemed quite ready to recognize the points at which she needed help and to seek the best help available. As was true with most families, the financial status of the Baers improved considerably following the depression. The husband was able to increase his social activities, the wife added to hers and spent more for her clothes, and the children were given many advantages that the parents considered important. However, the family continued to live in the same neighborhood. Mrs. Baer said at one time, "Why should we move? Our quarters are as comfortable as any we could find for considerably more rent. The people who are really our friends will enjoy us here as much as if we lived in an exclusive suburb, and the money that is released because of the low rent makes it possible for us to do many things that we consider to be more important than living in a more privileged neighborhood." When she completed her cooperation in the study, Mrs. Baer expressed appreciation for having had an interesting opportunity. At the same time it was clear that she was aware of her contribution to the study. That it had been a reciprocal arrangement for this college woman could not be denied. Mrs. Baer's history clearly reveals her individual pattern of behavior and her consistent following of this pattern in dealing with life. Though she had many experiences similar to those of Mrs. Baer, Mrs. Glenn, whose history follows, demonstrates an entirely different way of working out her life experiences. The Case of Mrs. Glenn (A woman with a marked sense of community responsibility ) "I understood there was a study of college women in progress here," Mrs. Glenn said in introducing herself, "and that you wanted people to cooperate with you. I feel that I have been
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out of touch with things of this kind ever since my marriage and if you can use me I would really feel that I was making some contribution." Mrs. Glenn went on to say that she had occasionally attended the alumnae meetings of her college group and at these times always felt that she was on the outside of things. So many of the women were doing something "really important" and making a contribution to the community while "all I am doing is to take care of the house and look after my children." She was sure that as a college woman she had experienced many privileges not given to others. It had always been emphasized at her college that as a privileged person she must go back into her community and make her influence effective. "I really planned to do that, and I feel such a slacker because I am contributing nothing worth while to the world. It takes all my time to see that the children have their wants cared for and to manage the house. I do have help, but of not too efficient a variety, and three children claim a lot of time. If my cooperation would be of help here I would so gladly give it and at the same time I could feel I was doing my bit, even though in a very small way." Mrs. Glenn was a young woman in her late twenties. She was quite a pretty person in a dainty, fragile way. Her skin had a pallor suggestive of poor health, but her alertness and eagerness in conversing more or less altered this impression. She said, "Dr. Glenn and I have very definite ideals for our family which we are trying desperately hard to achieve. We deliberately planned to have our children as soon as possible. It seems strange that I gave up with almost no regrets the career for which I had trained, to assume the responsibility of parenthood." Rather hesitantly she said, O f course, my children are very gratifying to me. I only wish that some of the other home conditions might be better." Mrs. Glenn laughed when she said that her preparation for homemaking had been most inadequate and that even after several years of marriage she was still laboring under some of the difficulties arising out of lack of skill, although she quickly added that most of her household activities were comparatively easy
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now. Having been reared in a family where servants were responsible for the housework, and having herself no experience in or preparation for it, she found it difficult suddenly to assume full responsibility for her own housework. Just before her marriage Mrs. Glenn had taken a demonstration course in housekeeping given at one of the department stores in the city and found it very helpful. The motivation of a small apartment that was entirely her own, plus the cooperation of her husband, made the first few months of housekeeping comparatively simple. With the arrival of the first baby and the eventual coming of two more, homemaking became a very complicated affair. As she discussed these difficulties her words indicated that she had the mechanics of the home under control, but her manner showed a lack of confidence and sureness as to her real achievement in managing her house. Dr. Glenn had completed his medical training and gone into the practice of his specialty, in which they hoped he would eventually succeed. At the time, it was not sufficiently well established to relieve them of financial concern. In saying so Mrs. Glenn showed a great deal of feeling. She said there was no need for this financial stringency as her own mother was very wealthy and could easily help them without in any way depriving herself. "It seems so strange," she said, "that as an only child on whom everything was lavished before, I should suddenly appear such a totally different person to my mother now that I am married. My allowance of $150.00 a month prior to marriage could have been continued had my mother so desired. Instead, we have struggled desperately to make ends meet and many times do without the important things of life, and my mother knows this, too." Again Mrs. Glenn laughed but none too humorouslv and said that she had not meant to launch forth on a discussion of this sore spot in her life, because she really wanted to talk about women's education; but perhaps what she had said might be comparable to the situations of other college women. She considered herself and her husband to be a well-suited and extremely happy couple. She expressed great admiration for his intelligence, tolerance, and understanding. They had such
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fun together, and no matter how much time they spent with each other there were always so many things of interest that they were never "talked out." Dr. Glenn was probably more interested in sports and out-of-door activities than she, but her lack of interest she believed was due to the many demands on her time which precluded outside activities. Her husband was and always has been very cooperative in the home, giving whatever help seemed to be needed in order to ease the situation. She expressed deep appreciation of his help but at the same time felt some regret because it was frequently necessary for him to give so much of his time to the housekeeping. Mrs. Glenn so often found herself paying servants but getting little work from them. She knew that she got along well with people but perhaps did not know how to demand efficient work. "I really think I get along quite easily with people and only become irritable when I am very tired. On the whole, I am in good health but I find that often I do tire." She explained that a bad case of influenza some two years before had left her in a fairly depleted condition but she was sure at the time she began her interviews that her health was quite good. Interestingly enough, her physical examination at the service revealed a woman quite below par physically, suffering from a combination of difficulties that would make any expenditure of energy difficult. Regardless of the suggestions made for improving her health, Mrs. Glenn was unwilling to accept the idea that she was in anything but excellent health. She simply said that the work she did exhausted her. A rest was suggested by the service physician but was vetoed immediately because Mrs. Glenn knew the family finances would not stand the strain. Nor did she wish to have a vacation away from her husband. Dr. Glenn handled all the family money but discussed everything with his wife. Neither one felt that they had enough money to permit a personal allowance for either of them. Somewhat wistfully she said, "I hope that sometime our income will be large enough so that we will each have something to spend for ourselves." Throughout the two years of interviewing, Mrs. Glenn fre-
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quently brought into the conversation her resentment towards her mother for not giving them the financial aid that would have meant so much to them. "She has always given me and bought me elaborate gifts which mean nothing to me and are out of keeping with what I have," she said. "Still she would not be willing to give me the money the gifts cost even though she knows I want it and need it." Always when discussing her mother she revealed a mixture of feelings. She seemed genuinely devoted to the older woman and was continually trying to please her, although she obviously resented her mother's domination and wielding of power. Each time she had an emotional outburst over the unfairness and domination of her mother she always followed it up with periods of guilt and remorse when she went to great lengths to explain what a fine person her mother was and what a really good mother she was in spite of this one point of conflict. The older woman was very critical of the way in which her daughter handled the children. Mrs. Glenn believed that she and her husband were in full agreement over their children. Occasionally she expressed a little concern over some problem with the children, but her general conversation indicated that she believed herself to be doing a good job with the youngsters. In contrast, friends and professional people who knew the family reported from time to time that the children were extremely difficult to handle. Undoubtedly there was a good relationship between the children and the parents, but the impression which the children made outside the home did not square with the mother's opinion of them. They were unable to conform in such usual situations as kindergarten and Sunday school. Throughout her contacts with the service, Mrs. Glenn frequently expressed the feeling that she was anxious not to make with her own youngsters the mistakes that had been made with her. She felt that in early childhood she had been so rigidly supervised and circumscribed in her contacts with other children that she had missed many of the things she hoped her own children would have. Being an only child, she had naturally held a position of great importance in the family, in which there were several adults besides the parents. Even though her own father
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died when she was a small child, she believes that she experienced enough masculine influence in her home through the presence of two grandparents and two uncles. On one occasion she said, "My mother was an extremely generous, affectionate person, but she saw to it that I conformed to what she wanted. I did not really mind, but I sometimes used to see the other girls doing the things that I wanted so to do and would wonder what it might be like to have that kind of freedom." There was much visiting back and forth within the family and among the older people, but her home was never a center of social activities for the other youngsters. One thing she missed particularly as an adolescent was being able to participate in "slumber parties." When six years old she entered school, with much enthusiasm. It was her first chance to be like other children. She recalls most of her early school experience with pleasure. On her first day of school she was unable to get to the toilet in time, and the resultant accident caused her some embarrassment but did not seem to have a particularly marked effect on her; the joy of being with other children eventually overcame the impression made by that particular experience. All through school she had fun, although she was never allowed to walk to and from school but was called for by some adult member of the family. Her grades were good and she bore out in school accomplishments the promise of her early precocious development, which was a source of great pride to her mother. "When I said my first word at seven months of age, there was much rejoicing in the family," she said. During her late childhood and early adolescent years, her mother frequently took trips during the winter months and at such times took her out of school. At first it made no particular difference, but eventually the effects were felt in her relations with the youngsters at school. As she came back into a situation that was going full force she always had a feeling of inadequacy and hesitancy until she could "find herself." On the whole, she considered herself to be quite adequate as a youngster. She continued to be so in her social relations in spite of her limited contacts. She realized many times that she might have created more fun but recognized that it was not con-
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sistent with her personality to do so. She thinks that on the whole she tends to be dominant, even though her relation to her mother has always been one of almost complete submission. She said, "I can take a stand even with her when it is absolutely necessary." It was her mother's idea that she go to college. Apparently no other consideration came into the situation. "I was expected to go to college in just the same way I was expected to enter school and continue through high school. My mother selected the eastem college which she believed was best for me and I went." T h e first time she experienced any difficulty at school was at the end of high school, when she became concerned over passing the college board examinations. After considerable stress she did so. Her first year of college was overwhelming. It was all she could do to keep up her studies and she had little or no time to think of the other important aspects of college life. During the sophomore year she became more accustomed to the new way of study and work and finally began to participate in extracurricular affairs. She gave a glowing account of her college except in two matters. Her first criticism was that most of the instructional staff, in her opinion, had been selected chiefly because of academic ability and with little thought as to teaching personality. She knew that many of her subjects could have been far more meaningful had the instructors themselves been more dynamic and alive to the use of their material. Her second criticism had to do with the social life of the college. She herself did not suffer, since she knew a number of people outside the college and had interesting times with them, but she recognized that for girls who were not acquainted with people outside the immediate campus there was little social life. While she was at college she had a number of boy-friends who were attending college in the vicinity. However, she was not particularly interested in any of them because she had already fallen in love with the man whom she afterward married. He had finished college before her, but because of the long period of interneship still had a long time ahead of him before his earnings would permit marriage. She had been perfectly sure
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of wanting to marry Dr. Glenn, but to her great amazement found that her mother definitely opposed the marriage. As far as she could see, the only basis for her mother's disapproval was that her fiance had not yet established himself financially. At her mother's insistence she continued her social contacts with the men in her community even after graduation from college, in spite of the fact that none of them interested her except as casual acquaintances. The showdown came finally when she held out against her mother, saying that she expected to marry the man of her choice. In spite of the stormy sessions that followed, the younger woman held doggedly to her determination and her mother finally gave in. She was given a nice wedding, but immediately afterward the mother discontinued all financial assistance, though she had previously lavished everything on her daughter. Mrs. Glenn was keenly anxious to work out a successful marriage. Although she was sincerely in love with her husband, she had questioned in her own mind how satisfactory any marriage could be, owing, she believes, to the fact that in her own family and among friends of the family she had seen little happiness among the married couples. However, she repeated on several occasions that she and her husband had worked out a thoroughly congenial and happy relation. Their sex adjustment was difficult at first. They were both young and had received a most inadequate kind of preparation for marriage in spite of her husband's medical training. On the day of her marriage, her mother, showing obvious embarrassment, gave her material for contraceptive douching. Shortly after marriage she and her husband consulted an obstetrician when they realized that their sex adjustment was not what they wanted it to be. They talked over their problem, a number of questions were answered for them, and they were given literature which she believes was very helpful. She believes their present sex adjustment to be as normal as that of the average couple. "I quite enjoy our sex experience, but I am a little disturbed because I practically never experience complete release at the time of intercourse." She went on to say that in spite of the mounting and unrelieved tension, she looked upon their sex
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experience as a very happy time for them both and said she had brought up this mátter only because she thought any help that might be given to add to an already pleasant experience was justified. She frequently experienced sexual release through her dreams. In going back over her early sex history, she said that on a few occasions when she was a child there had been some sex investigation and play with the other youngsters which fascinated her. Her mother discovered this sex play, but Mrs. Glenn believes that her mother showed no excessive emotion or disapproval. On one or two other occasions before she reached puberty there was sex play in the group. She always had an intense curiosity about sex. In early adolescence she picked up her sex information from girls in school, for she was never given any by her own mother. She was past sixteen years of age before menstruation began. It caused her no particular concern nor was the onset accompanied by much pain. However, she has frequently found herself becoming tense around the time of menstruation. She explained that she has always experienced considerable tension and nervousness from time to time. Relief usually comes with adequate rest. She recalls that she was quite a poor eater as a youngster but learned much about a normal and adequate diet when in college, and as a result made a great effort to remedy her bad habits. She found that by means of diet it was possible to control a tendency to constipation. She believes that knowledge of diet stood her in good stead during her two pregnancies, as she was able to adjust her food intake more intelligently than she might have done otherwise. She read a great deal throughout her first pregnancy, and learned to follow carefully the necessary rules of health during pregnancy. She was well during both pregnancies. Throughout her contact with the service, certain aspects of her life stood out quite sharply: She was an intelligent, energetic, sincere young woman trying to muster all the forces of her own abilities and the training she had received to do a thoroughly good job as wife and mother. She expressed a marked feeling of responsibility to the community but considered that she had
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fallen down in this duty and that as a college person she should have contributed much more. One of her most serious difficulties was to break away from the overprotection and overdomination of her mother, to whom she was deeply attached. She recognized her lack of skill and her inefficiency in managing a home, and though she indicated verbally that this difficulty had been overcome, it was obvious that she was not satisfied with her achievement. The small income of her husband had made for some rather serious problems, not only because it was insufficient but also by way of contrast to the unlimited means of the wife before marriage. From observation of Mrs. Glenn it would seem that she will always "carry the torch" for some community cause, in spirit if not in deed. The disparity between her feeling of responsibility and actual accomplishment in this matter will probably determine to a great extent her degree of satisfaction with herself. As her children grew old enough to be in school and busy with their own interests, Mrs. Glenn began to participate in certain community ventures which she believed were important. The satisfaction she derived from such participation was obvious. In this work she felt herself to be contributing something worthwhile to the world, as her college had charged her to do. "I am not an exceptional person," she said, "but my intelligence is adequate and my training is far above average, and I can do something more than just be a wife and a mother." A comparison of the different ways of approaching life shown by the histories of Mrs. Baer and Mrs. Glenn, often in circumstances having some similarity, will be of interest. Mrs. Baer exhibited her own definite and clear-cut ways of meeting life. First, she adjusted herself to every situation that could not be changed. Second, her determined efforts to avoid duplicating the negative aspects of her parents' home in her own family life could be seen again and again. Third, the definite and positive attack which she made on every difficult situation until some kind of a solution was
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effected, either through her own unaided efforts or by means of the help she had sought, left few unresolved conflicts in her life. Fourth, there was evidence of her lack of dependence on her parents in the adult level of her relations with them. Fifth, her early desire for marriage, which she regarded as the complete fulfillment of her life, persisted throughout with no deviation. At no time did any other way of life appear to offer her satisfaction. Mrs. Glenn showed a different but equally clear-cut way of patterning her life. First, she conformed completely to the demands of her mother and obviously derived satisfaction from such conformity. She suffered marked guilt feelings whenever she resisted her mother's overprotection and domination. Second, her own need to dominate, which had been consistently thwarted and rechanneled by forced conformity to the mother's will, caused much conflict within herself whenever her own aggressiveness cut across her smooth pattern of conformity. Third, her overdependence on her mother could not be broken but resulted in bitterness and resentment and at the same time a great need to remain under her mother's protection. Fourth, there was evidence that her verbalized self-confidence was really a defense against her inadequacy in meeting life. Unwilling to seek help, because she believed she should be able to work everything out for herself, she frequently showed signs of being baffled and bewildered. Fifth, her ambition to contribute something worth-while to the world was unrealized, or so it appeared to her, owing to the necessity of devoting herself to the job of homemaking and rearing a family, a job that for her lacked status. To determine what caused Mrs. Baer and Mrs. Glenn to develop these particular patterns is not the work of this study. Suffice it to say that as a result of the biological
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make-up, environmental pressures, and experiences of each, these women evolved and now faced life with two entirely different patterns of living, which were in evidence from early childhood. The realization of their respective aspirations clearly reveals these differences. That Mrs. Baer wanted marriage above everything is quite evident. She used her homemaking opportunities as a means of creating the smoothrunning, secure home life for which she had longed as a child. Within her own home she found ample opportunity for creative expression. Her mild interest in the problems of society did not indicate any real need to participate in solving them. Her vocational experience was anything but pleasant. Mrs. Glenn, on the contrary, failed to realize her ambitions through her home. Her desire to contribute something worth-while was thwarted by the homemaking situation. She had aspirations which could not be realized in the monotonous routine of housekeeping. It would be difficult to determine whether her idealism was developed in early life, in adolescence, or during college life, but it is certain that it offered her relief from her mother's domination. Her frustration continued, for though her efforts in the home were comparatively successful she did not find the home situation a challenging one, or one that offered opportunity for achievement according to her pattern. Neither woman had any specialized preparation for homemaking, but Mrs. Baer acquired housekeeping skills with great ease and was challenged by home activities. For Mrs. Glenn they were always a problem—a problem which she wanted to disregard. The two women were of comparable intelligence according to their intelligence test scores. Their college records
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showed no marked disparity in achievement, though Mrs. Baer was possibly the more concerned with social life in relation to her total college program. There is some evidence that Mrs. Glenn's college made more of an effort to give its students a feeling of responsibility to society as educated women. However, this policy can scarcely be said to have caused her aspirations, though it was undoubtedly in accordance with her individual pattern of life. One can speculate on the outcome had the two women exchanged colleges. According to their wives, both husbands were cooperative and understanding. Each woman was living on an income markedly below the one to which she was accustomed. Mrs. Baer's was much the lower of the two. However, she preferred her independent family life to the easier living possible in her husband's family home. Mrs. Glenn, too, wanted an independent family life, but resented her mother's failure to relieve their financial stringency. Of the two women, Mrs. Baer had the better health. Neither one had enjoyed robust health. Mrs. Baer's one serious illness after marriage was met by a direct and persistent effort to regain her health. Mrs. Glenn's attitude towards illness was to ignore the danger signals and make no special effort to care for herself. Many variations in the patterns of life of these two women will be evident to the reader. The history of each of the one hundred women shows an equally individual pattern of life. Yet virtually all had the same kind of educational program from grade school through college. The same philosophy of curriculum held, though there were some variations in administration and teaching. The same
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standards of successful functioning were upheld for all. Though some attended coeducational colleges and some women's colleges, the kind of basic curriculum offered, the methods of teaching, and the organization of college life were almost identical from one college to the next. Too often, individual differences have been considered only by the physical education departments of colleges; but even here the most obvious difference may be the only one considered, and the girls are often lined up according to height. As one tall, striking blonde put it, "I just prayed that sometime I wouldn't head the line in gym. I knew I was tall, but the instructor in that class left me in no doubt." Many parents, as well as educators, are unable to adapt themselves to the individual patterns of their children. One bewildered mother exclaimed, "I try to treat the boys exactly alike, but they react so differently. Bob saves his allowance and can scarcely be induced to spend it for necessities. Bill's is spent treating the crowd the moment he gets it. That is the way they are in everything, and yet I know I have treated them the same way." The case of Mrs. Denne illustrates especially well the persistence of the individual pattern of life, though she was able to modify somewhat her unfortunate habit of attempting to dominate situations and people. The Case of Mrs. Denne (A woman who modified her tendency to dominate others) Mrs. Denne pulled the kodak pictures from her bag and looked at each one with evident enjoyment before passing them over, one at a time, to the interviewer. "Since you are going to know such a lot about me," she said,
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"you should be introduced to my family. This is my big, handsome husband. You may not think him good-looking, but I do. Doesn't he look as though he would be a lot of fun? Well, he is that. You can see how the children adore him by the look on their faces. ' T h e big boy next to his dad is Tom, our oldest. Even at twelve we know he is a regular person. They are the best of pals, too. He is a proverbial chip, except that he is more serious than my husband. Of course, he is not perfect, but we think him mighty fine. "Now Marge is only nine, but she has ideas and talent enough for half a dozen. Look at those long, slim hands. Can't you tell she is an artist? I wish you could hear her and watch her hands while she plays the violin. Of course, we do not expect her to be a concert player, but her music will always be a source of much pleasure to her and others. It is quite difficult to keep up with the many projects she initiates, and I will say that the one member of the family over whom there is much parent-teacher consultation is Marge. If we can have just the patience always to understand her and help others to do so, she will develop into a glowing person, I know. "Betty, as you see, is a rollicking, happy-go-lucky, granddispositioned child. The expression on her face is the one you always see there. My husband thinks that she is like me, but I know that her disposition is a far better one than I ever had. Betty is six. "Bill needs no introduction. It is obvious that as the baby of the family he reigns supreme. He is a real clown, and the only thing I worry about with him is that he will be utterly spoiled. The children are as much to blame for it as the adults. "The picture would not be complete without the dog, because our family supports quite a menagerie, and wherever you see a child you usually see an animal as well." Mrs. Denne went over all the pictures one by one, showing different poses and activities of all members of her family. Only once did a cloud appear on her face. Pointing to one picture, she said, "That is my husband's mother. You can see what an
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attractive-looking woman she is. I am afraid, though, that I have to be in the class with those women who really have mothers-in-law. She is not bad, but she is my mother-in-law, that's all." In her first interview, Mrs. Denne gave a clear description of her family status. She said that her husband was a successful businessman whose income was sufficiently high to make it possible for them to maintain a fairly high standard of living. They lived, she said, in a suburb where they had quite spacious grounds around their home and the children had opportunities for play that would have been impossible in the city. That Mr. Denne had to commute to his work by train was a serious drawback, but the family had thought long and seriously before moving out so far, and concluded that the values most important at the time were adequate play space for the children and an opportunity to move about with greater freedom than would have been possible in the city. So the father commuted and accepted this unpleasant aspect of his life as philosophically as possible. "I try very hard to organize the house on an efficient basis," she said, "just as my husband does in his business. I feel that the girls should have free time and a well-outlined plan of work. There is nothing that annoys me more than to see my friends piling enough work on one maid to keep three people busy, and then complaining about the inefficiency of household help. I believe that servants should be treated with the same consideration as other employees." Mrs. Denne said that she preferred white servants, since she had always been accustomed to them, though she had tried Negro help on one or two occasions. She hesitated a minute and then said, "You see, my mother-in-law is a Southern aristocrat, and of course she has always been accustomed to Negro servants. It was she who insisted that I have them in my home, but I never felt easy with them. Mother Denne complains constantly of my present help, particularly because she says that my children are not exposed to a hundred-percent American atmosphere. The maids I have at present are both Swedish.
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"My husband is a lot like his mother, in that he too had always insisted that I have Negro servants. After I had tried both, he agreed with me that I got along better under the circumstances to which I was accustomed, so it is no longer an active issue with us. However, whenever Mother Denne starts to criticize, he again says that he prefers Negro help." Mrs. Denne said that she and her husband were very active socially, but probably not so active as many of their friends; they devoted so much time to their hobbies and other interests that according to friends they were almost recluses. They both enjoyed their friends, though it was through Mrs. Denne entirely that Mr. Denne had developed his friendships, since he had not lived in the community until, a short time before their marriage, he established himself in business in the place where his wife was born. "Phil and I also like to go dancing," Mrs. Denne remarked, "and we have one or two friends who enjoy it with us, but we have the most fun with certain people who like to talk with us about politics, art, religion, the international situation, music, and the like. Phil loves to hunt, fish, and ride. I fish and ride with him, but renege on hunting. He says that he will make a hunter out of me yet, but I rather question that. We spend a lot of our time doing things together with the children. At present all of us spend whatever available time we have in building a playhouse. Even Billy thinks he helps by hammering nails in the boards." Mr. Denne's mother, a woman of considerable charm but with poor health, lives near her son and his family. For six months of the year, young Mrs. Denne says, the difficulties are great. The other six months of the year the older woman spends in a warm climate, usually in Florida. During this time her son and his family experienced a far greater amount of freedom than during the other half of the year. "Before our marriage," said Mrs. Denne, "neither of us anticipated a problem with his mother. She was so thoroughly charming and accepted me so wholeheartedly that I had no idea that there would ever be any difficulty. Mother warned me that since Phil was an only child his mother would naturally expect much
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more from him than if there were other children. I was rather amused at this warning then," Mrs. Denne said somewhat ruefully. Mr. Denne's mother and other relatives came North for the wedding. "I can tell you it was a brilliant affair," she said, "with all that Daddy and Mother could do to make it a happy time for me, together with the aristocratic gathering from the South. It was an event to be long remembered. However, as a result of the wedding preparations and attendant functions, I was completely worn out by the time the actual marriage ceremony took place." Very foolishly, according to Mrs. Denne, she and her husband had chosen to make a long motor trip through the West for their honeymoon. The days of tiresome driving, the feeling that they should be sightseeing, together with the extreme fatigue they both felt, were not conducive to a happy honeymoon. "If I could give a warning to young married people," she said, "I would urge them to pick a spot for their honeymoon where they might settle down and take life easy. Motoring at best is difficult, but it is terrible for a honeymoon." When they returned from this trip, Mrs. Denne had the problem of settling her home. She had played no part in the management of her parents' home and therefore had much to leam. The management of servants was extremely difficult, especially when her husband urged her to employ Negro servants. The Dennes had been married only a few months when his mother came to make the first of her many visits, which ultimately resulted in her moving North. This first visit was a great revelation to Mrs. Denne, and she realized that she actually was facing the mother-in-law problem about which she had been warned by her own mother. "As my husband was an only child," she said, "it seemed logical for his mother to move North after his marriage. She was a woman with an independent income. The move came step by step. At first she came for visits, which extended from one to two or more months, until finally my mother-in-law was spending all of the good-weather part of the year with us. Our servant problem was aggravated by her presence. She is and
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has always been very helpless. She interfered with us all to such an extent that relations in the family were at the breaking point." Rather bitterly she said, "If only I could have been sure that Phil believed in me as much as he did in his mother, it would not have been so bad, but her criticism of everything I did for him, for the children, for her, and in the house was never openly refuted by my husband. It always seemed as though he more or less took her part, just by not making her see that he agreed with me. The children reflected the dominating influence of their grandmother to such an extent, and the effect was so disrupting to our family relations, that finally even Phil was willing to admit that his mother's 'visits' would in some way have to be brought to an end. He will never let me criticize her, and I try not to except when I reach the end of my patience, and then I usually have an explosion of tears, which only angers him. If I can control myself and leave him alone long enough, he gradually works himself and all of us out of our difficulties, as he has in the past." She went on to explain that Mr. Denne had finally arranged for his mother to have a home of her own near them, with competent servants. T h e mother was much disturbed over this arrangement and shed many tears, said many bitter things, and blamed young Mrs. Denne for what she regarded as the inhuman treatment she was given at the hands of her son. "My mother-in-law has often said that if her son had not married a Catholic none of these things would have occurred," Mrs. Denne remarked. "You see, my husband's mother is a conservative Presbyterian and has a marked anti-Catholic feeling. Strangely enough, this religious difference did not seem to disturb her at the time we were married, but when Phil decided to join the Catholic church his mother expressed violent opposition and has blamed me ever since. "I am a Catholic and my convictions are firm and deep-rooted. At the same time, I am tolerant and believe that others should develop for themselves the kind of religious pattern that most nearly meets their needs. Phil's earlier religion was not satisfying to him, and after recognizing how much mine meant to me
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he deliberately set about to learn as much about it as he could. I do not believe that I influenced him in any way. We are in agreement on the point that everyone needs a religion. Since we now embrace the same faith, there is no conflict in regard to the children. We both believe they should eventually have the opportunity of choosing for themselves the religion that meets their needs. I resent my mother-in-law's interference on this point, as it is not up to her to dictate to us the religion we follow, any more than it is up to her to say how we shall manage our family life." Whenever she discussed her mother-in-law, Mrs. Denne exhibited considerable emotion. She admired but resented the older woman. She evinced some feeling of social inferiority by her frequent references to her mother-in-law as a "Southern aristocrat." She was not sure that she was as important to her husband as his mother was. In spite of Mr. Denne's almost always concurring with her in her way of life if he were given a long enough time to work things out, she seemed to feel a certain amount of insecurity as to her relative importance to him. With her own parents, she was confident that she held the prime position. As the youngest and the only girl of three children, she reigned supreme. Owing to a long, serious illness as a baby, she had gained complete control over her family at a very early age. The brothers were so much older that she saw little of them except as two more admiring followers. In her early life she was the youngest member of a large clan. The grandfather lived to a ripe old age and held in a tightly knit unit about him all of the second and third generations. This paternal grandfather lived with her parents until the day of his death, and dictated virtually every move made by the family and his other children. Each of the other family members called on him daily. His great delight seemed to be indulging her, his youngest granddaughter, to an outrageous degree. His other grandchildren were much older. Undoubtedly the fact that Mrs. Denne had a long, serious illness made her a completely spoiled child. The grandfather "egged her on," which annoyed the mother and father, but they, in turn, were equally indulgent. They held some vague idea
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that an effort should be made to control their little girl, but since they had nearly lost her and always considered her their baby, they found it almost impossible to subject her to any real discipline. "I must have been terrible," she said, "because I can remember working myself up into a frenzy, screaming and kicking, whenever I was crossed in the slightest degree. I knew they were afraid to let me go too far because I might make myself ill." Mrs. Denne recalls that almost every whim she felt as a youngster was satisfied. Innumerable elaborate toys were given to her by aunts, uncles, and cousins. The parents made a few attempts to give parties for her, but they usually turned into fiascos as the spoiled darling insisted upon trying to dominate a number of other almost equally spoiled youngsters. "One of my parents' mistaken ideas," she said, "was to persuade me to be particularly kind to the servants' children. As a result, I developed a feeling of superiority and an obnoxiously patronizing attitude towards those I considered less privileged. I hope that my own children will never develop such an attitude." Though her circle in early childhood included many people, they were all family members, and her first introduction to anyone outside this inner circle came upon her entering school. Here she found herself at a great loss. She did not know how to play with children. She was constantly making efforts to dominate them, as she did her parents. The result was complete frustration. Whenever she became angry and annoyed with school, her parents sympathized with her and indulged her further in order to make up for anything unpleasant their baby had suffered. By the time she attended kindergarten she realized that she was different from other children and longed to be like them. Instead of helping her, her parents' indulgence seemed only to make her feel more inadequate and failed to give her any technique of adjusting herself to other children. "My expensive clothes set me further apart," she said, "and everything that was done made it more difficult for me to achieve my purpose of becoming like other youngsters. Rather than
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help me to change myself, my parents always attempted to change the situation when I was unhappy. I cannot count the number of times I changed teachers or schools in order to find a better situation." In early adolescence she found herself accepted by a group of girls at school. It was the first satisfying experience she had had with children of her own age. She was overjoyed and made every effort to identify herself with them by doing exactly as they did, dressing as they did, and reacting as they did to every situation. An entirely new problem arose as she found that the home was no longer the completely satisfying place it had been, and the parents had to face the fact that their baby was breaking away from them. Both the mother and father strongly resisted the change and as usual put every material obstacle in her way. But she believes that once she had tasted the joy of being accepted by her social group, nothing could have kept her from continuing on that path. Accordingly, her reaction to her parents was a negativistic one, intended to overcome their overprotection. Her school work proved no particular problem either in elementary school, high school, or college. It seemed a simple enough matter to stay on the Honor Roll and maintain an "A" standing. This record was not exactly what Mrs. Denne wanted, as it tended to set her apart from some of her friends who struggled hard to maintain a passing average. "I used to try and groan about my fears of grades," she said, "until it finally looked too utterly ridiculous for words, as I almost never got anything but A's. I eventually learned to keep as still as possible so that I did not accentuate my own accomplishments. This field was not the one in which I wanted to excel." She went on to say, "My parents wanted me to go to college just as they wanted me to have everything else that life could hold. I cared relatively little about it, except that most of my friends were going and I wished to be in the swim." She realizes now that she probably made quite an error in her choice of a college, and that she should have selected one where she would
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have made entirely new contacts. However, again because of her desire to be like others, she chose the college the majority of her friends attended. With much feeling she said, "During my high-school days I had tasted the joy of being accepted by friends, and it must have gone to my head because that was the thing I really wanted more than anything. Therefore, you can realize my intense disappointment when my personal relations in college were not established on a satisfactory basis." T h e group of friends with whom she went to school more or less broke up at college, and the girls became parts of different cliques. She tried to keep herself "in" with all of them, but it soon proved impossible. Each frustrating situation made her struggle harder, until she finally became aware that she was being completely rejected by the several different groups to which she desired entrance. ' T h e only thing I knew to do," she said, "was to resort to my earlier tactics of gaining my own way." Showing off, temper tantrums, and all kinds of defensive behavior soon marked her as a problem girl. She became so involved that she saw no way out of it. She realized that she was doing exactly the things that prevented her from achieving her desires, and yet she could only continue this kind of behavior. She broke rules and was called before the student government, which gave her some of the desired attention but at the same time brought forth censure and blame from her associates. She became extremely difficult in classes and was reprimanded by instructors. "Somehow or other," she remarked, "my work always remained satisfactory from an academic point of view. I also knew enough people on the outside so that I had fun, but not at college." Again her parents recognized that she was unhappy, but their only solution was to carry out the old pattern of trying to get her to change colleges and to lavish material advantages on her. "I was determined that I would not quit," she said, "and even though in one way it might have been better for me to do so, I stuck it out and won my battle there."
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Between her sophomore and junior years at college she went to a camp as a counselor at the suggestion of one of the college instructors. It was here that she came in contact with a camp director, a mature woman, who was a rare person. This woman had a remarkable philosophy of life and was the first person in whom Mrs. Denne could see a definite philosophy being put into practice. After some weeks she plucked up enough courage to go to the director for help. It was given quite willingly and with much understanding. It was through the guidance of this older woman that, for the first time in her life, she actually got a true picture of herself and what she was trying to do, and saw her failures as entirely the result of her own lack of understanding and infantile behavior. With great conviction Mrs. Denne said, "From that time on I began to struggle in an entirely different direction. Instead of making an effort to control everyone else, I began to make the greatest effort of my life to control myself. "I shall never be able to understand why my loving but mistaken parents could not have found some way to help me, nor do I see how it was possible for the college authorities, responsible for the welfare of a student, to permit me to experience two years of suffering that no one could have failed to recognize. It was only because one instructor had enough personal interest in mc to suggest the camp experience that I got help as soon as I did. Since then I have never been the spoiled brat I was during the first eighteen years of my life." After returning to college, her reeducation of herself proceeded slowly but steadily. From time to time there were certain persons from whom she gained further help, but she believes that it was because her eyes had been opened by the camp director that she was able to recognize the points at which she needed further guidance. Her relations with boys were always quite satisfactory. Through friends of her family she was introduced to a number of college men. Her adjustment was never as difficult with them as with girls. She had one or two fairly serious love affairs and thought that she might even marry one of these men, but it was
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not until she met Mr. Denne while spending a winter holiday in the South that she realized she had met the man she most certainly would marry. From the start, Mr. Denne was a romantic person to her, corresponding as he did to the traditional picture of the chivalrous Southerner. He too was having a brief holiday at the resort where they met. He was accompanied by his mother, who, surprisingly enough, immediately accepted her. She and Mr. Denne liked each other at once and a very ardent affair soon developed. After she had returned to her home city, where she was doing some volunteer work, Mr. Denne made several trips to see her. Though she did not know it at the time, he was trying to work out plans to realize his long-held ambition of going into business in the North. Through connections which her father helped him to make, he transferred his business to her home city. Shortly afterward they became engaged. Of her marriage she said, 'This was the second big break I made from my family. Theoretically they wanted me to marry, but of course they lost their baby when I did. The break was not as hard for me, nor do I believe it was quite as hard for them, as the one at adolescence. I was not so blind as I had been at that earlier time and did not strike out at everyone as I had in my attempt to achieve independence. Even though we had a number of rather stormy times, I should say that as a result my parents and I have worked out a mature and good adult relation. I have something awfully secure in them, and although we do things quite differently, I know they have been as sincere as is humanly possible in their desire to see me have all that could bring me happiness." Since her marriage, Mrs. Denne has seen her parents only occasionally, for they have moved to a milder climate for the sake of her father's health. She is sure that she will always have their love and backing, no matter what the circumstances are. She visits them at least once a year with all her family. These visits are brief but usually very satisfactory as they all enjoy the section of the country in which her parents now live. She sees her father oftener than her mother, for business occasionally brings him back to the city. Once or twice a year the mother comes
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with him, but the visits never last longer than a few days. The children are extremely fond of their maternal grandparents and Mr. Denne is also enthusiastic about them. Mr. and Mrs. Denne are both active in the community, though she has more time than he does for such activities. "I feel that everyone has a certain responsibility to the community in which she lives," she says, "and the more free time a person has the more she should contribute to those things which she believes to be important. I am afraid that I think too many things are important and that I have too many irons in the fire, but they all seem worth-while and important to me." Throughout the interviewing, the impression that Mrs. Denne gave was that of a woman leading an extremely active life. She not only participated in the many interests of her husband and children but also carried on a very active social life with her friends. In addition, there was marked evidence that she saw her responsibility to the community and served it in many different capacities. She said that she believed her major in college had contributed much to this interest in community participation. Her early desire to take up the profession of law was violently opposed by her father, who could not see that it had any connection with his daughter's life. Reluctantly, she gave up this ambition and substituted for it the more common major of English. During her junior year, she began to see a much more definite tie-up between her college major and her future life. "At that time," she said, "I decided that I should choose my major with the idea of having an abiding interest that I might pursue after leaving college. With this idea in mind, I changed to a major in Social Science, in order that I might know more of the community problems with which I might eventually be faced." Along with the volunteer work which she undertook after graduation from college, she continued study on social organizations and the peculiar problems of her own city. Since marriage, and particularly following the birth of her fourth child, she has been an active participant in a variety of community projects. From time to time throughout her three years of contact with
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the service, Mrs. Denne frequently referred to the congeniality of her marriage, saying: "If I did not have a problem with my mother-in-law, I would almost say that my marriage was without problems. Maybe that is a good thing, though, to keep it from being monotonous." She said she believed that their very satisfactory sex adjustment had contributed much to marital happiness for them both. Before their marriage Mr. Denne sought help from understanding medical friends and as a result was able to help his wife to adjust to the sex relations of marriage. Her satisfaction from this aspect of married life increased steadily. She realizes now that she was a product of a very inhibited background, and that her sex education was not only meager but also one that tended to increase rather than reduce her difficulties in sex adjustment. She is convinced that had she not married the kind of man she did, her sex adjustment might have been quite different. She thinks that her good adjustment was the result of her husband's knowledge, patience, and realization that it was important for both the husband and the wife to derive pleasure from sex relations. In childhood she felt considerable curiosity about sex matters, chiefly, she believes, because she had so few contacts with other children. Her mother was greatly embarrassed by her questions. Menstruation was explained to her by a friend of the mother's, at the mother's suggestion. Her curiosity was sharpened in the early years of adolescence and occasionally she found herself surreptitiously on the edge of the conversations which the other girls had about sex. She said, "I was quite taken aback to hear one of the older girls in the school explain in a very knowing way that people had sex relations for pleasure as well as for having children. This remark gave me much concern for some time, for the attitudes I had built up were different. "There were a few social hygiene lectures in college to enlighten the girls, but they appeared rather ridiculous, because all I ever got in the way of information was a knowledge of the high percentage of venereal disease in the country and the need
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for us to be aware of it. As to attitudes, I felt extremely disgusted over the many girls who developed hysterics in these lectures. I can't say that any of it was of help to me." Whenever Mrs. Denne referred to her husband she tended to give him much of the credit for all aspects of their happy marriage. She said: "He is so much fun, and we usually find that no matter how difficult the situation is it can eventually be laughed off." She was sure that he was very proud of her and her accomplishments. He always listened with great interest to her recounting of activities. They often disagreed in point of view, she said, but he was always willing to listen to her ideas and considered them as seriously as his own. "Both my husband and I feel that everyone in the family should participate," she said, "and the children have exactly the same right to say what they think about the happenings in the family as we do. You will be amused to know that twelveyear-old Tom very seriously asked why I did not wear a housecoat in the morning, as the women in the magazine ads always did. You can be sure that I immediately got a housecoat and dressed up in it every morning for breakfast," Mrs. Denne said, laughingly. From time to time, throughout her contacts with the service, Mrs. Denne brought up questions about the children, usually after she had carried out suggestions that had been made or to make a point. Usually she sought confirmation rather than actual help as to her procedure. Most of the situations discussed concerned temporary problems attendant upon the individual child's stage of development. A frequently recurring difficulty and the one that seemed to baffle her most was Marge's adjustment to school. Marge's teachers reported that it was difficult for her to conform to the general program of the school. 'They always say that she has too many ideas that she wants to try out, instead of doing the things the classes are doing," she said. "I think it is grand that she has the ideas, and maybe I have stimulated them too much. I do not care about her being such a conformist as the school seems to desire, although of course I know that she must learn
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to get along with people. I feel my job is to help her learn something of conformity and at the same time not lose her individuality. That sounds like a big order." Mrs. Denne said that she could probably appreciate Marge's lack of conformity as much as anyone could, because she herself had always enjoyed original, imaginative things far more than stereotyped interests. She knew that her friends considered her an imaginative person and she believed that she was. "I conform much more than I used to," she said, "because I see the value in it. Maybe I can help my children to see this matter in some perspective." She went on to describe herself as a person who liked people and found it quite easy to get along with them now. She thought that probably her best characteristic was her humor, of which she had an abundance. Tolerance, too, was one of her really good points. She knew that she expressed herself with ease and was apt to talk too much unless she was careful to give the other person a chance. "Occasionally," she said, "I revert to my old way of behaving. Some day I may be able to feel that I have left behind my pattern of behaving as a spoiled child. I do get discouraged when I revert to it, but I believe those times are becoming fewer every year." Mrs. Denne said, "I still find myself somewhat bothered by a feeling of social inadequacy, although my friends would scream with laughter if they heard me say so, because they all think I am equal to almost any occasion. I have a lot of friends and I have learned one thing—that is, how to get along with them." She went on to say that she knew how to participate with people and, when the occasion demanded, how to manage a situation without letting them be aware of it. People sought her more than she sought them, she said, although she believed that she was able to go half way and more if necessary in her relations. "I believe that is the achievement of which I am proudest," she said. "It took me a long time to learn what was necessary in the give and take with friends." Before completing her history, Mrs. Denne said with some
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feeling: "I hope what I have given you will be of benefit to other women. I have profited by looking at my life as a whole, as well as by getting your ideas on the way in which I am working out my present family pattern. However, I shall feel that I have been justified in giving this time if my own experiences shed some light on the responsibility that the college must take in helping girls to gain some understanding of themselves and develop their own working patterns of Ufe." It will be seen that Mrs. Denne gained complete control of her family at an early age, and that to manage the situation became of paramount importance to her. As she extended her contacts outside the family she found her techniques ineffective, but the desire to dominate the situation still remained of utmost importance to her. AU her efforts to force others to her way were ineffective. A serious situation ensued until she modified her techniques and found more acceptable means of dealing with people. During her high-school and college days she made an effort to change her pattern of behavior and to develop a more acceptable approach to life and the people with whom she was associated, but it appears that the underlying motivation of her life remained fairly constant. It is not a hopeless task that education faces in attempting to aid young people in the development of their personalities. Perhaps one of education's major responsibilities in this area is to develop an insight into such problems and to provide techniques and resources which will assist the individual in directing the forces of his own personality in accordance with its persistent trends. A further discussion of these points is given in the report of a study made by Fleming and Roberts 1 on the basis of these one hundred case histories. 1 Katherine E. Roberts and Virginia Van Dyne Fleming, Persistence Change in Personality Patterns ( to be published ).
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3. The parent-child relation is the most potent of all influences outside the organism in shaping personality.— This generalization has long been accepted in theory. However, though some at least of these women seemed to recognize the influence of their own parental homes in their lives, there is little evidence that they were fully aware of the powerful influence that they were exerting on the developing personalities of their own children. Not only the priest of classic fame who said, "Give me a child until he is seven . . ." but also the present-day educator who remarked, "They arc five when they come to us, and by that time they are already well set, so what can you expect us to do?" showed recognition of the tremendous importance of parental influence. Certainly the present study points clearly to the importance and persistence of early habits and attitudes learned in the home. Yet little real status is given to the job of parenthood. If some training for parenthood were insisted upon, we could hold parents responsible for the guidance of their children. The parents in this study seldom failed to provide for the material needs of their children, but they took much more lightly the responsibility for their powerful influence on the personality and character of their children. In many instances the women were aware of the direct influences of their parents upon them, but in others, though the effect was equally evident to the observer, the woman herself seemed not to see the relation of cause and effect in this aspect of her life. One woman, for example, referred again and again to her mother's persistent jealousy and suspicion of her father, which she believed was groundless. In her own marriage, sex adjustment was difficult, and she soon developed an intense suspicion of her husband and all his behavior. Never at any time, however, did she seem
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aware of the possible influence of her mother's attitude on her own. The majority of mothers in this study had had no special preparation for the responsibility of parenthood. They did seem conscious of the health rules and principles of child training that are discussed in current literature and in study clubs. But though they were desirous of being the best possible mothers and were anxious not to make the mistakes their own parents had made with them, they were for the most part unaware of the more subtle ways in which they were influencing their children. One mother expressed concern over her child's lack of affection for and unresponsiveness towards his parents. She frankly admitted that she herself had completely rejected her husband in recent years, but she had not seen that this rejection had any effect on her child's behavior. Since children's patterns are set early, since they persist, and since parents exercise the most potent influence in shaping these patterns, do not parents have a tremendous responsibility to obtain the kind of education that will really fit them for a task of such magnitude? Who, then, is to see that parents are given such education and such help?
4. All aspects of the individual's life are
interrelated.—
All the case studies presented in this chapter illustrate the fact that there is no such thing as a discrete problem; that no problem is met as an isolated group of circumstances, but presents itself and must be met in relation to the total life of the functioning human being; and that every phase of personality or experience affects, in varying degree, the total personality. The experience of the service in attempting to aid Mrs. Johns, who wanted help in setting up a budget for her family, may be cited as a special illustration. The planning of a
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budget has been stressed in recent years in certain college programs, in magazines, and by financial institutions and might seem to present a relatively discrete situation. It is usually treated as such. Mrs. Johns was convinced that she and her husband were spending unwisely and believed a specific plan would help them. When her accounts were examined it became evident that she spent for certain things that she considered important, while Mr. Johns had different ideas about spending. Each considered the other extravagant but thought himself justified in his own expenditures. The wife said she was sure she could prove to her husband where he was wrong if she had a budget. However, when it was pointed out to her that an analysis of their expenditures showed that hers were the less justified in relation to the total family welfare, she quickly dropped the budget, saying she thought it would be too restrictive and would take the joy out of life! It was not lack of knowledge about money that caused the trouble here. Rather it was Mrs. Johns's attitude towards herself in relation to her family. Along with such attitudes, health affects the way in which an individual functions and meets various experiences. The personality pattern of the individual determines his reactions and affects every phase of his life. Just as all aspects of the personality are interrelated, so do all experiences have an interrelated effect upon the organism. The life situations pictured in these case histories give clear-cut evidence that education has flagrantly disregarded the interrelatedness of the personality with the totality of individual experience. The whole child has only gradually come into focus in the educational world. The phrase is still too often a theoretical concept rather than a realistic one dictating educational practice.
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5. Most situations are recurrent within the life span of the individual.—Not only is the individual continually confronted with new experiences; he also meets the same situations again and again throughout life. Though there are always new aspects in every repeated experience, the essential elements remain the same. Problems that arise and are solved at one stage of development are not necessarily permanently dismissed. That a child suffers and recovers from a disease does not make him immune to illness for the rest of his life. He may or may not have the identical illness again, but it is probable that he will be subject to illness of some kind. To resent the recurrence of a problem or a situation because it has once been worked out is to be unrealistic, to say the least. The romantic novel that leads the heroine through the vicissitudes of a chaotic love affair sets a false note for the reader when it leaves the impression at the book's conclusion that all conflicts are solved forever. The hero and heroine, like other men and women, will not be free of conflict after marriage, but will continue to be faced with situations in relation to each other which must be worked out again and again. These recurrent situations are affected not only by the good results of former conflicts but carry the residue of the bad aspects as well. There is evidence in this study that the women were often far more baffled by the recurrence of a problem which they had worked through once than they were by the first occurrence. On several occasions Mrs. Denne plaintively remarked, "I thought surely my problems with Mother Denne were over because we all had made such a valiant attempt to overcome the difficulties, but now the same thing has occurred again and it is all to be done over. When a problem is once solved, why can't it remain solved?"
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Too seldom do people understand that they will meet the same kinds of situation again and again, and that these situations will present the old familiar problems and difficulties to them. Plant 2 remarks that no problem is ever completely solved, but is restated from one level of development to another. Not only is the individual's pattern of life essentially the same throughout life; the situations that he meets are also recurrent and persistent. Education has too often implied that once the dragon is slain, the struggle is over. Somewhere in their education young people should learn that continued adjustment and problem-solving will be required of them. Meeting problems well can be very satisfying. Being unafraid to meet them is one of the greatest guarantees of security in life. 6. As problem situations recur there is need for repeated education and reorientation appropriate to the stage of development reached by the individual.—This generalization is an outgrowth of the preceding. One cannot learn all that is important about a life situation in one sitting, or at one level of development. Let us consider this generalization in concrete terms. There is evidence in the data of this study that parents who gave their children any sex education at all considered their duty discharged when the child's early questions were answered with a few simple statements of the "facts of life," or when the daughter was told in advance of the approach of menstruation, or when she was warned later of the dangers of permitting boys to take too great liberties. Few parents gave their children sex education at more than one stage of development. Occasionally a mother who had ignored the developing sex life of her daughter gave her -James S. Plant, Personality and the Cultural Pattern. New York: The Commonwealth Fund, 1937.
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first indication of responsibility in the matter when she abruptly handed over contraceptive materials on the eve of the girl's marriage. To consider any one of these isolated efforts as providing adequate sex education is as absurd as to expect a seventh-grade home economics class to train a good cook by teaching a girl to make cup cakes and prune whip! Not only in the lives of the women themselves but in their problems with their own children as well, there was evidence that education as a repetitive process is little understood. One woman said, in distress, "My three-year-old son is exhibiting violent behavior whenever he is around adults. I am sure it cannot be due to the presence of his baby sister, now eleven months of age, because I prepared him carefully for her arrival." Questions revealed that his disturbing behavior began when the little sister was about seven months old. The mother herself pointed out that it began when the baby had developed particularly cute ways and for the first time drew the entire attention of admiring adults. It had not occurred to her that her little boy needed further preparation to accept his little sister and the attention she commanded, or that for many years to come he would be faced again and again with the problem of his relation to her. Preparation for his sister's birth, no matter how adequate, could not continue to meet the situation. The boy would require preparation for each successive step of his relation to her, as the years went by. Not only is it impossible to prepare a child to meet all phases of a life situation at any one time; it is true as well that education given too far in advance of the life situation will prove useless. Teaching child care to a girl of twelve may have certain values but it will not completely prepare her to care for her own babies when she has become a woman.
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7. Society determines the form of life situations and sets up certain specific expectations for women which are confused or clear in varying degrees.—These women were all
products of American culture, but they represented different backgrounds within this culture. The more economically privileged women had certain patterns set up for them by their social groups which were different from the patterns familiar to other groups. Such differences were often very marked between husband and wife, because there is ample opportunity for these contrasts to show up in marriage. In the case of the Dennes, the husband's Southern background had established for him certain "musts" which were not in agreement with those of his wife's background. Had Mrs. Denne come from a rural home where an entirely different pattern of household participation was specified by society, the conflict between her and her husband would probably have been greater. In another situation, one young husband was considerably upset because his wife would never serve meals in the kitchen, as his mother had done on the farm. He felt that eating in the dining room was entirely too formal for every day. His wife, on the other hand, was accustomed to a different way of life, and following it was important to her. Conforming to the dictates of society is easy for some, hard for others. Some of these women gave every evidence of eagerly following the social customs of their original group or the one they had adopted. Others violently resisted the restrictions with which society surrounded them. Mrs. Jennifer was greatly disturbed because one man among their friends insisted on drinking beer when none of the rest in the group approved of it. She felt his behavior was not "gentlemanly." Mrs. Wills, on the other hand, hated
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to see the Blacks come to the country club parties, because young Mrs. Black disapproved of drinking and was such a "wet blanket" when everybody else was enjoying cocktails. Mrs. French was much criticized by her friends when she sent her child to nursery school. "They think I am an unnatural mother for sending a three-year-old out of the home," she said, "but I know she is benefiting by it." The situation for Mrs. Brock was quite different. "My friends," she said, "like my husband and myself, are all working people. We want children and expect to have them, but at the same time we do not want to give up our professions, nor can we afford a home unless both partners work. The State should make some provision for people like us by setting up good inexpensive nursery schools for children from six months of age on." Thus we see society delineating, restricting, and dictating patterns of conduct. According to whether he conforms to or rebels against these group demands will the individual usuallv find satisfaction or frustration. 8. Women's role in our society is complicated, unclarified, and shifting.—In the study of these one hundred women it was not difficult to see why so much confusion has arisen over the education of women. The many women who had to shift their role not once but again and again give conclusive evidence of the difficulty of developing a program of education that will prepare all women to meet their needs at different stages of their lives. Seldom in this group was the role of any woman clearcut and unswerving. Often the role that the woman wanted for herself was in conflict with the one which society prescribed for her or the one which her husband and parents assigned to her. Such conflict was increased by the varia-
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tions in role that the woman was obliged to assume with changing circumstances. Mrs. Baer's history shows that in her own mind her role was clear-cut and direct from childhood on. Forced temporarily to shift this role and to earn a living before marriage, she felt unsatisfied. Her desired role of wife and mother was in keeping with that set for her by society. The role of a professional woman was one that she did not wish to assume, even though it was approved by her college. In marriage she realized her basic aspirations. Following marriage, her role again shifted temporarily under pressure from her husband, who considered it desirable for her to have her own work outside the home. Pregnancy was welcomed as a means of release from this unwanted role. Once more she could function entirely as a wife, with the added satisfaction of motherhood. Mrs. Baer had a relatively uncomplicated role compared with that of most women today. With considerable directness she achieved her original ambition. College tried to offer her chiefly vocational preparation. Instead, she gathered incidental information from the girls majoring in home economics which was in line with the role she most desired and which was of more help to her than all her vocational preparation. Her parents wished her to earn a living and she was prepared to work if she did not marry immediately, or failed to marry at all, or had some other need for such preparation. Her parents, along with the rest of society, expected her to marry if possible and to work if she did not marry. Mrs. Baer wanted to marry but not to work. When forced to fill a role that she did not desire, she was unhappy. Her husband's wish that she should work outside the home indicated that the role which he envisioned for his wife differed from her own conception. Among his group
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of friends, all the wives worked. Her parents, on the other hand, wanted her to work only until she married. She herself wished only the role of wife and mother. She was obliged to meet this confusion and shifting of roles, but fortunately was able eventually to assume the role she most desired. T h e case of Miss Brown presents a quite different picture. The Case of Miss ( A woman who changed
Brown
her role without difficulty )
"I really am a very ordinary kind of person," Miss Brown said, on introducing herself, "and I don't see that anything in my life would be of interest to you. But if you want my cooperation, then you may have it, because I think giving my history would be a lot of fun." She was a rather prim, small, compactly built, tense young woman of about thirty years of age. She was very enthusiastic not only about the study in prospect, but also about the interviewer's office, certain furnishings in the room, and several suggestions made in the first general conversation. Her enthusiasm did not appear to be assumed, but the interviewer felt that it was either recently acquired or consciously stimulated. Miss Brown was teaching English in one of the large high schools of the city. She explained in some detail that she loved her work, which could not possibly become monotonous because each new class presented new interests and characteristics which she had to meet by a constant replanning and reshaping of her study program. There was only one shadow across her vocational life and that concerned the head of her department, a woman who was apparently very jealous of those with whom she worked. On one or two occasions Miss Brown found that taking up matters with the principal had been helpful, but she soon realized she could not make a practice of doing so because the jealousy aroused in her immediate superior produced unhappy aftereffects. Ac-
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cording to her usual way, rather than cause trouble she gave in and consulted the principal no more. Miss Brown said, "I especially like my associations with some of the other women teachers. With several of them about my own age I have established a very happy social life. I have a nice place to live and I moved there at the suggestion of one of these teachers. It is a boardinghouse where both men and women, employed in all kinds of different jobs, live." She went on to say that even though there were men in the house her social contacts were mostly with the women boarders. However, she found it pleasant to have men about, if only at mealtime. In her work she saw very few men, and socially none of them paid any special attention to her. When asked about recreational interests, she replied enthusiastically, "Oh, I have many things that are fun. I go to the theater as much as possible, and one of the girls and I are hounds for visiting all the art exhibits in the city. Since I have been here I have tried to do just as many different things as possible. Until I came here my activities were quite limited, but a city of this size offers so many things of interest that I feel I must not miss them. There are a few things I miss. I should like to go to a ball game occasionally, but I have no opportunity to go as I should have to have an escort and I have no men friends." She said so with no evidence of self-pity, but as if she merely stated a fact. She continued throughout the interviews to give a picture of herself as a person who was crowding into her leisure-time hours a variety of experiences, most of which were new to her. She ate at foreign restaurants whenever she could find anyone to enjoy this experience with her. She often went to concerts. She expressed little interest in athletics, but said she walked considerably. Her chief pleasure seemed to be having new experiences and participating with others in their activities. "I thought a lot on that question you asked me," she said, "about realizing my ambitions, and I believe I am doing that very satisfactorily. I want to know about many things, and I find I am just beginning to leam much that I have always wanted to know. I also wish I could make a real contribution of some kind to the world, to make life better for people. Maybe some
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day I will find out what that contribution is. I believe I can be a very happy person, even though I know now that I shall probably never marry. "It is funny how I have changed my ambitions. As a little girl, and while I was growing up, I always expected that the one thing I would do would be to marry and have children. I have never had any dates in my life, and have never seemed to attract men, so I know now that I probably never will marry. It does not bother me because I have found so many things that are exciting and fun to do. My life couldn't help but be happy. "I have always been in excellent health. Perhaps the only physical problem I have ever had is constipation, and I find if I watch my diet carefully and walk a great deal I can keep it reduced to a minimum. It is a splendid thing to have good health. I know how to appreciate it because there are others in my family who have never been as well as I am." In discussing her family, Miss Brown said that both parents lived out West in a small town having a population of some five thousand. She had lived with her parents in this town from ten years of age on. The family had previously moved several times. Her father raised cattle, and during die early years of her life had taken the family from one state to another before he eventually settled in the town where the family now lives. Miss Brown was the older of two children, of whom the younger was a boy who developed infantile paralysis at two years of age. For the next fifteen years most of the family's interest centered around the crippled child. He was loved and indulged by them all. During those years Miss Brown recalls giving in to her brother on every point. "He was such a lovable youngster," she said, "and we hated so to see him suffer that none of us could bear to cross him." As the brother developed he found that a teasing technique was extremely disturbing to his sister. This technique he used, much to her discomfort. "He was a lot prettier and more vivacious than I was as a youngster," she said. "No one could help but love him and pay attention to him. I never minded that, although I found it hard to take as much teasing from him as I did. "Mother and Dad both loved him very much, but they loved
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me too. I do not believe there was any difference in the affection shown us, except that Brother was ill and we all felt we had to make it up to him in every way possible. "When he was seventeen and I was in college, they started a series of operations on him. As a result of one of them, he died. We were all crushed. I felt I could never go on, and I know Mother must have felt the same way. I stayed out of college for a year because of it, but I finally was reconciled to his going." Miss Brown described her mother as a vivacious, imaginative, lovely person, devoted to her children and never too busy to give time, attention, and effort to them. "My earliest memories," she said, "were of Mother's dressing up in the afternoon in a pretty dress and then sitting down to tell stories to my brother and me. Rainy days were as much fun as others, for she made us candy, roasted apples for us, and introduced all kinds of new games." Because they lived on the edge of the town there were few children to play with and her early years were spent alone or in company with her mother, who welcomed and entertained the occasional child who came into the home as she did her own children. Nevertheless, as a child Miss Brown had almost no social contacts outside her family, and was quite a solitary youngster. "I was perfectly satisfied during all those early years to play by myself," she said. "I was a shy, timid, retiring child among people of my own age. I have remained so, although since I have been teaching I have improved tremendously. I am still shy and timid, but I can cover it up better now. "I did not enter school until the second grade, but was taught to count and to say my A Β C's at home. Mother used the everyday home situations to teach me. When the clothes were washed and were ready to be hung on the line, she would help me count out the number of clothespins to be used, so at quite an early age I knew my numbers. I learned to read as well." Miss Brown entered school with much anticipation, but her social adjustment was difficult because she did not know how to play. Nor did she learn how to play. She always watched with keen interest the activities of others, but usually from the
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side lines. Throughout the grades and high school her intellectual development was far in advance of the social side of her life. It did not take her long to realize that she was superior mentally to most of the children in the group. Doing school work was relatively easy, and her conscientious efforts were a great joy to the teachers. She, in turn, liked the teachers. She was always aware that her family felt superior to most of the families in their community, and though she did not herself feel superior, except in her school work, she became aware of these social distinctions as she grew older. Often her mother would say, "She is a nice little girl, but not quite the person for you to play with." "I feel sure," Miss Brown said, "that had I received any attention from boys in adolescence my family's reaction would have been the same as it was to some of my earlier associates. Mother liked children as children, but when they became my companions she was much more critical of them. At the same time, I was always conscious of my own social inadequacy in playing with others. I longed to do the kinds of things they did and to participate in their activities, but since I couldn't I had a good time playing alone. I loved every minute spent with my mother because she was such a lovely person and so much fun. "Early in adolescence my complexion became very pimply. I was awfully ashamed of it and nothing I could do seemed to correct the condition. I am sure it contributed to my poor social adjustment." Another complication was that she remained out of school from time to time when she accompanied her family to seek medical help for the crippled brother. In this way she lost out in the day-to-day activities. Punishment was administered by her mother, who took complete charge of discipline in the family. "Strangely enough," she said, "I felt on much closer terms with my mother, and had a fear of my father that I never had of her. "Religion was also a very important aspect of our family life. Both my mother and father were members of the Methodist church but Mother was much more emotional about her religion than Father was. I always had to go to Sunday school. My only real feeling of revolt occurred when I was seven or eight years of age. I thought the Sunday school's idea of sin was ter-
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rible and argued the point with Mother. I soon got over it, though. "It was expected that I should join the church in early adolescence, which I did, of course. Gradually I became less and less active in the church, and religious practices had a decreasing amount of meaning for me. I have never had any feeling of revolt or particular conflict except that one time. Mother seemed to accept it when I became less interested in the religious practices of the church. I believe as my parents do except that my views have been broadened and modified somewhat. I would not say that religion had ever been a particularly disturbing factor or an especially vital one in my life." Miss Brown thought her mother did an excellent job of sex education. Since her father dealt in cattle there was ample opportunity to learn about animal reproduction from firsthand observation. Her earliest questions were answered by her mother, as were her later ones. Never at any time did she think a question about sex was evaded by her mother, whether it concerned farm animals or human reproduction. She realized that such an attitude was quite rare, because among other girls she had found almost no one with a similar background. Miss Brown believed that her attitudes toward sex were normal and healthy. She had not experienced any undue curiosity. She occasionally listened to girls in college trying to put together bits of information gleaned in various ways, but she found their discussion of little interest. Miss Brown's mother prepared her for menstruation when she was about twelve years of age. She was interested in the explanation and agreed to discuss the matter further when she actually began to menstruate, which did not occur until she was seventeen. She felt no real concern over the delay except that after entering college she found herself slightly embarrassed over being the only girl of her acquaintance who had not started to menstruate. Menstruation has never been painful for her. In late years she has found herself becoming a little depressed a few days before each period, but there are no other distressing accompaniments. During her high-school years she developed a certain amount
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of nervous tension which has persisted, becoming aggravated when she goes through periods of strain and loses much sleep. Her first two years of college were similar to her former educational experience. Since she attended college in a neighboring town she found little difference between her college experience and her high-school years. She thinks her selection of a college was rather unfortunate, but it was close to home and inexpensive. It was a small, coeducational, denominational college. Both her mother and father were keenly anxious for her to attend college, in spite of the fact that she herself had little desire to do so. It was during her sophomore year that her brother's death occurred, and because of her desire to stay with her family afterward, she lost a year at college. In her last two years of college she found herself becoming much interested in social activities and participated in them with much greater ease. She found a social life with girls beginning to be very satisfying to her. This period was the first truly happy one in her life. From that time on there have been many developments in her life that have brought her far greater satisfaction than she ever experienced as a child. She has continued her education since college, each year taking some kind of educational work that she believed was stimulating and that would keep her in touch with new developments. In her first teaching experience she derived considerable status from being a college graduate, for most of the other teachers in the school were not. With few exceptions, her five years of work experience after graduation from college have been very satisfying and she has thoroughly enjoyed her contacts with coworkers. It has been only in her present job and with the head of her department that she has experienced any difficulty. She believes that this difficulty can be overcome by guarding her own actions carefully. She has found it hard in the last few years not to have companionship in participating in social activities. She is confident now that she has overcome her timidity to such an extent that she can initiate, participate in, and really enjoy whatever social activity she desires.
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In summing up her life, she confirmed the consistency of pattern revealed in her history by saying: "I really am quite satisfied with my life the way it is. I have fun; I have friends and much to live for. I know now I shall never marry, but I am not worried about it. I really would like to be a writer and maybe some day I can get busy and be one." The society in which Miss Brown grew up expected girls to marry. On the other hand, her parents were eager to have her educated for a vocation as a means of earning a living. From childhood she had hoped to marry. However, her lack of popularity, the economic need of the family, and her willingness to follow the pattern prescribed by her mother persuaded her to shift her role. This change she accomplished with no great difficulty and with satisfaction to herself. To expect to marry, to train for a vocation, to work awhile, to marry and discontinue work, and to take it up again if the necessity arises—this pattern is the one many women follow. Such shifts and changes present a very confused plan of life as compared with the clear-cut, stable, universal pattern followed by men, who are expected to prepare for a vocation, enter it, and continue it throughout adult life. Yet the plans of education for men and women are almost identical. If such a plan meets the needs of one sex, it may be questioned whether it meets the needs of the other. 9. To understand women at any one stage, an understanding of their total development up to that time is necessary.—Every person carries with him always the residue of the experiences through which he has passed. The cumulative effect of attitudes, beliefs, knowledge, cultural patterns, health or sickness, social relations, and traumatic situations may be reinterpreted at each step that the in-
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dividual makes into the future, but it is never actually lost. Although Mrs. Baer took great pains not to duplicate the conditions in her parents' home, she was consciously motivated to a new way of living by this past experience, the effect of which was thus not lost. Had the counselors in Mrs. Denne's college been cognizant of her experiences in childhood and adolescence they would have been far better able to understand her real difficulty and to help her to reorient herself for the future. Neither nursery-school teacher nor adult counselor can act effectively without a knowledge of the past experience of the child or adult with whom he deals. Too often in the past the women of this study had been treated as though they were living in a situation isolated and remote from all experience except that of their immediate present. 10. Women make an active attack on their problems, the degree of effectiveness being determined by their insight and resourcefulness.—There was little if any evidence that the women of this study ever gave up attempting in some way to solve their problems. Lassitude and indifference were foreign to them. Their method of attack was by no means always successful, but the fact remains that they made a conscious effort to solve the problems that confronted them. Often the method of attack indicated a marked lack of insight. Mrs. Denne's efforts to work out her relations with her associates by tantrums and other attempts to dominate the situation were vigorous but hardly discriminating or successful. In many instances where insight might have been more acute than it was, the women of this study could be observed resorting to mechanisms of rationalization, projection, and identification in an attempt to work out difficult situations. The woman or man who blames
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the spouse for all family conflicts is no more mature than the child who kicks the stool that just tripped him. To have insight into human situations and relations is valuable. To lack it is often disastrous to satisfactory living. Resourcefulness is almost equally important. Mrs. Baer did not know how to deal with the problem presented by her little girl's leg brace, but she understood the difficulties that might arise and sought help, and when the right procedures were suggested to her she was able to work out the situation. Most of these young women were actively attacking the problems they met in everyday life, but some were of course more successful than others. The circumstances with which many of them had to deal were serious and even tragic. Some few had escaped into an attitude of weariness and ennui. Nearly all suffered at times from a sense of frustration. With a will to tackle and resolve the problems of their lives, these women appeared to be baffled in many ways that were unnecessary. Had it been possible at all times for them to gain a greater insight into themselves and their problems and had more facilities for helping them to meet their problems been available, they would undoubtedly have been spared much unnecessary frustration and defeat. To spare women the challenge of struggling and tackling difficulties would be to deprive them of some of the maturing forces of life. To spare them some of the completely baffling and frustrating circumstances from which they see no escape would be one way of preventing many personality problems and much unhappiness. Mental hygiene has taught us that circumstances often overwhelm the individual and prevent him from function-
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ing satisfactorily. There is evidence to show that if society, through the home, the school, the church, and its other institutions helped people to gain more insight according to their own needs and in relation to their level of maturity, and provided social and psychological resources on which persons could draw in proportion to their individual differences and circumstances, there would be far less confusion, frustration, instability, and unhappiness. It is the thesis of this chapter that the individual personality is more than the sum of its parts, and that the individual's experience, past, present, and future, is an interrelated totality which makes the isolating of specific aspects of personality unreal and false. Too often the scientifically minded educator has been willing to accept studies of such isolated factors of personality as a basis for education. The generalizations presented in this chapter are based upon a careful study of one hundred women considered as total personalities, each functioning in society within the framework of her own life circumstances.
Chapter WOMEN'S
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can now be put: What is the most important finding of this study? There is one clear-cut answer—an answer which cannot be couched in statistical terms but is significant nevertheless. In this book certain postulates are set up, the truth of which has long been recognized by parents and educators alike. They may be stated simply: All normally developing women are exposed to a myriad of life situations which are common to all women but which differ in many respects from the life situations to which men are subject. Out of these life situations problems may or may not develop. That some problems will arise is inevitable. The nature of the problems that arise in the life of the individual woman will depend upon her personality as well as upon the peculiar circumstances of her life. That problems arise most often around certain predictable situations or incidents in the life of women seems clear. The most important finding of this study is that both the parents and the educators of our one hundred women, in the elementary school, in the secondary school, and in college, had almost completely ignored the evident need of these women to be prepared for certain inevitabilities of their lives. HE FOLLOWING QUESTION
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It is possible that those responsible for the education of women are not yet entirely aware of such generalizations as we have stated in the chapter on "Education and Women's Needs" and have not had occasion to weigh the relative importance of the values implicit in the specific problems analyzed in Chapter II. But, beyond any question, every adult who has considered the matter at all knows the importance of the fact that life begins, for both the girl and the boy, in the parental home. It is in the parental home that the pattern of the girl's behavior is laid down, tried out, and arrived at as her way of life. It is here that the girl learns how to relate herself to others and what she may expect from others in their relation to her. It is here that she gleans information about her world and begins to acquaint herself with the culture in which she lives. It is here that her attitudes are determined by what she hears and sees and how she feels about her experiences. Yet, knowing and seeing the struggles and heartache of people as they try to live with their families, to get along with others, to establish heterosexual contacts, to earn a living, to make adjustments in marriage, and to bring up their children, those educators whose job it is to educate for life have seemed unwilling to tackle the job of real and vital education. The educator has passed these matters over, saying they were work for the parents. True, perhaps; but parents cannot be all-wise in their tremendous task until and unless they are educated to be parents. To those who call themselves educators, parents need to look for understanding, help, and guidance, offered realistically, continually, and repeatedly throughout life. When there is real insight into the powerful effect of early home influences and when the concept of a vitalized dynamic education for life has been
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realized, educators will be able to see their opportunity and obligation to provide help for the family as one of the most effective ways of making education a real force in preparing people to live well-rounded, well-adjusted lives in their various environment. Among parents themselves the attitude expressed by the remark of one young mother is all too common. "I just raise my children by 'intuition,' " she said, "even though I make a host of mistakes, I know." To think of being willing to relegate to "intuition" the most important task in the world, that of preparing human beings to meet the exigencies of life, is disturbing, to say the least. What a multitude of sins this one word, intuition, has covered—almost as many perhaps as "common sense," which is one of the most uncommon things in the world. Undoubtedly many fine parents have depended upon intuition and common sense in rearing their children and have done a splendid job in preparing them for life. But intelligence must play a part. Too often do we see parents who depend upon intuition and common sense dealing with their children in such a way as inevitably to produce in them poor adjustment, lack of understanding, and frustration. To cite an example from our study: Mrs. West "felt" that it was not right to tell her five-year-old son that the husband and father had deserted them. She was "convinced" that the child would be disturbed if he labored under the stigma of divorce. Recently she had become worried over the child's withdrawing and overdependent behavior, which she in no way connected with her own treatment of him. She sought help from the Advisory Service about this problem. Some time passed before she understood that her subterfuge with the boy, together with his feeling of
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strangeness over not understanding the disappearance of his father, had caused his difficult behavior. When she could honestly face with her son the true circumstances of their situation, the improvement in him was gratifying beyond belief. If we relegate the education of families to intuition and common sense, the question must be asked: upon whose "intuition" and whose "common sense" may we depend? Are the common sense and intuition of Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Jones equally good? Mrs. Smith has grown up in a home where she felt strongly secure in the affections of the family. She has learned the meaning of cooperation and fairness. She has definite ideas and views, which are those held by her family, but at the same time she is tolerant of those held by others. She has experienced success, and has also learned how to accept failure. She has been given guidance but has gradually learned to make her own decisions. She has gained some understanding and insight into her own behavior and needs. Out of this background have developed her intuition and common sense, which she in turn uses in guiding her own family. Mrs. Jones, on the other hand, realized early that her mother loved her older brother more than her. She soon learned that his part was taken against her in any altercation, and that her only means of gaining her way in the family was by subterfuge. She was taught the "right" things to believe and given much prejudice towards any ideas differing from the family's beliefs. She soon learned that success had to be achieved at all costs. She learned early that the only way to effect her own way with her parents was to revolt, which she could do if sufficiently motivated. Strong techniques of rationalization and projection became so much a part of her pattern that she had no insight into her
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own behavior. Her intuition and common sense were utterly different from those of Mrs. Smith. When people responsible for education throw the responsibility for the most vital aspect of education back on the weak cover-all of intuition, they virtually say, "We are afraid to face realistically our own inadequacies and what education really involves." They virtually say, "We think it best for you to continue to carry over into your children's lives, by means of your intuition and common sense, the weaknesses, the blunders, the hostilities, the patterns, and the mistakes of your own lives. We do not consider it our job to help break this vicious circle by helping you to face the residue of your own background, your own way of life and reactive patterns, and to try and approach your life task as intelligently equipped as human experience, scientific findings, a knowledge of cultural demands, and an understanding of yourself can make you." Parents have the first, the most intensive, and the most persistent job of education—but they need help. Unless they are given such help there can be little hope for anything but a repetition in each new family of the patterns laid down in their parental homes. What parents think they do to their children and what they do are often two different things. So it is with educators. Read the statement of purposes in the catalogue of almost any school or college, or ask any school principal, headmaster, or president, what the aims of his institution are, and the answers will raise the hopes of all—especially those desirous of seeing people given preparation to work out their lives with a real measure of satisfaction. Such phrases as "preparation for life," "learning to meet life," and "education for satisfactory living" are in great evidence. An examination of the actual
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results in terms of the w a y in which the students so prepared actually live their lives gives us some indication of how far that preparation has been realistic in attempting to achieve its stated goals. L e t us look at the case of Mrs. Taft, who may be considered a product of the best that education offered in her day. H e r family was financially able and had a tradition of education that assured her of the best nurture and training available. Here is a woman, well endowed physically and mentally, and enjoying optimum conditions both at home and at school. The Case of Mrs. (A woman well schooled
Taft
but unprepared
actual problems
to meet
her
)
In a somewhat diffident but intent manner, Mrs. Taft first walked into the Advisory Service waiting room. A young woman of about twenty-five, she had a certain look of freshness that suggested the athletic type. Her clothes were of good quality but were well worn and obviously not of recent style. Her expression was overanxious and unsmiling. She said, at once, that she understood a study was in progress and that college women were needed to cooperate in it. Since she was a college graduate, with three years' additional training, she thought her experience might be of value. Rather wistfully she explained that stimulating outside interests had necessarily been limited since the arrival of her twin boys, and that an opportunity to discuss "important things," such as the education of women, interested her. Clear signals of tension were given by her posture and her excessive concentration on the discussion. Altogether she presented a picture of a forlorn and discouraged person, but one who was trying hard to cover it up and at the same time to find some solution. She talked long and earnestly about women's education, say-
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ing she had long wanted to air her views on its flagrant shortcomings. With all the time and money spent on her education, college had not helped to prepare her for her real job of making a home. She had never desired professional training in home economics but she, as well as most of her classmates, had expected to have a home and family. This expectation her college seemed to ignore, for nothing was done to prepare them for meeting the exigencies of later life, either in the family or in the community. One of the greatest indictments of the college, she believed, concerned the cloistered atmosphere in which it maintained the students and its failure to help them face the problems of real living. Somewhat as an afterthought, Mrs. Taft added that since she knew so little about the development of children, she would have many questions to ask about her own children, now that the privilege of asking them was offered her. Over a period of two years, successive conferences revealed the following situation: Mrs. Taft, a professional woman with no training in actual homemaking skills, was faced with an almost insurmountable combination of circumstances. She was now pregnant for the second time. Her twin boys were only fifteen months old. Ever since they could walk the children had had a striking talent for getting into everything. Their unstinted energy was exhausting to her and they were both putting up a stubborn and baffling resistance to toilet training. For the first time in her life, she was without the financial backing of her own family. Her father had died and her mother had broken markedly in health, and now needed the daughters help. Mr. Taft's income was uncertain and insufficient, though it had improved in the past year. She did not feel justified in hiring a maid, not only because of limited money, she said with conviction, but also because she was a supposedly intelligent woman and should therefore be able to run her household without a maid's help. In spite of the fact that the mechanics of running a house were
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completely foreign to her and her skills slow in developing, she had set up standards of perfection as to the preparation of foods, proper diet, the care of her babies, and the social atmosphere of her home. Her attempts at well-ordered and peaceful mealtimes, such as had been possible in her mother's home with the help of servants, were consistent failures. She insisted upon candlelight and good linen, silver, and china, when keeping up such standards meant hours of drudgery day and night and was throwing her into continuous conflict. The weary, endless details of cooking, washing and dressing the children, cleaning them up after "accidents," and rushing back to unfinished tasks had proved almost too much for her. As far as she could see there was no way out. She was also keenly aware of having failed to evolve a religious philosophy, which she believed might have given her help. Church attendance and participation in no way filled this need. Mrs. Taft considered herself a shy and retiring person. In spite of achieving moderate success in nearly everything she had done, she had always felt inadequate. She feared not doing the right thing, and failure always brought concern and anxiety. She was discouraged by her own tendency to worry without being motivated to action. Regardless of her keen interest in people, her desire to function successfully in a group, and her unusually privileged early background, she was socially inadequate and unsuccessful. This inadequacy she longed to overcome, for her own and her family's sake. That she was sensitive and that her feelings were easily hurt, and that she nevertheless did not seem to become more aware of others' feelings, also worried her. She conformed to social pressures and the opinions of others, always desiring smooth and peaceful relations with them. She believed herself to be like many college women today— eager to be good wives and mothers, wanting to make some contribution to the world in their own right, and yet being frustrated because of lack of skill, inadequate income, the cultural restrictions on women, and the husband's blindness in regard to the wife's needs and aspirations, which can never be realized in the marriage setting without his cooperation.
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Almost as though she was forced to say something that she had no wish to put into words, Mrs. Taft revealed that she knew her husband to be very happy in his marriage, but that she had deep-seated misgivings about her own feelings. She admitted a measure of satisfaction in trying to be a good wife and mother and providing what was important to her husband. But she could never be satisfied, she said, by completely submerging her own life. If she developed a professional life of her own, she could no longer function in her home as she felt she should. It was not feasible to pursue her profession on a part-time basis. Haltingly she said, "I don't want to face how I feel about my life, but I may have to some day." She had met Mr. Taft just after her graduation from college. Apparently he was established in a business, not very lucrative, but with the proverbial "future." Since she was strongly motivated to follow the profession of her choice, she was unwilling to marry before completing her years of graduate work. Mr. Taft urged that they become engaged, which they did. But it was a long engagement and the resulting strain was difficult indeed. Friends were estranged because of the Tafts' evident desire to spend their time entirely with each other. Courtship practices caused some conflict between them, but they agreed that sex relations should not occur until after marriage. While in graduate school, in order to prepare herself as intelligently as possible for marriage, she consulted the college physician. To her great chagrin, she was teased and made fun of by several in the medical department for seeking this advice. The situation was most unfortunate, for she had found it difficult enough to muster the courage to consult the physician on such a matter. As soon as her professional training was finished, she obtained employment. The salary was small, but pooled with Mr. Taft's it seemed enough to make marriage possible. Mr. Taft urged that they marry and she finally agreed. They found it was possible to board with friends at minimum expense, and for a while this arrangement proved fairly satisfactory. They definitely excluded any idea of having children until the husband's income should be increased. Thev were both
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working and achieving a very real degree of happiness and security. However, she did not for some time make a satisfactory sex adjustment, and until after the birth of the twins this aspect of her marriage left much to be desired. She was aware of the lack, but her husband refused absolutely to seek help. This attitude Mrs. Taft believes to be that of most men. She found it baffling since she was sure they were not doing all that was possible to work out satisfactory marital relations. Mr. Taft lost his job but shortly before the birth of the babies he found another. It was precarious enough, but it did mean a small income. Mrs. Taft also had financial help from her mother and was given many things for the new babies by her sister and her friends. Boarding, with infants, was far from an ideal arrangement, and when her husband's work provided enough money they moved to a flat. Mrs. Taft then found herself precipitated into a situation for which she was not prepared—requiring practical housekeeping and the patience and understanding necessary to care for and train babies—on a small and, what was worse, uncertain income! After the birth of her twins, Mrs. Taft became increasingly disturbed over her poor sex adjustment. She consulted her obstetrician, who explained that it was not uncommon and that frequently a satisfactory sex adjustment was achieved onlv after several years of marriage. Mrs. Taft found great relief in learning that she was not different from other women and that the defect in her marriage might be overcome. She was given some literature and fitted with a pessary, which has been for her and her husband the most satisfactory means of contraception. Since that time, Mrs. Taft believes her sex adjustment has progressively improved and is now a very satisfying part of her married life. She spoke with great feeling when she said that she would like to pass on to many young married couples the benefits of some of her own early and difficult adjustments. The fact that her husband eventually was willing to acquire a more adequate understanding of sex adjustment through reading meant much to her. She expressed the conviction that it was just as important for the husband as for the wife to have a thorough knowledge of this part of their life together.
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Another very good thing in her marriage, she said, was that she and Mr. Taft shared many interests in common. They enjoyed people and certain outdoor activities. She believed their interests to be wholesome and that they had enough separate as well as joint interests to keep from going stale. Neither of them believed in drinking. She made a point of entertaining as much as possible, since both enjoyed it. Yet she felt that one of the greatest difficulties in their marriage was that they were socially unskilled. Always she sensed a lack of ease when she and her husband entertained. She was sure that her parties had no life, and that neither of them could create the spark that is vital to successful entertaining. She believed that with capable household help it might be easier, but even so, she insisted, she had no real expectation of achieving the kind of atmosphere she so greatly desired. Mrs. Taft's parental home had always been the center of security and social activities for her, she said. But when her father died and her mother failed in health, matters were reversed. She felt extremely close to her mother, perhaps even more so than ever, and realized that it would be all but impossible ever to move away from her to some other town. Mrs. Taft had grown up as one of five children in a well-to-do professional family. One brother and two sisters were older, and after a ten-year interval she was born. The baby of the family was a boy two years younger than Mrs. Taft. Her relation to this younger brother now appeared to be one of unresolved conflict. Admiration for the brother's ability and some little affection did exist, but the feeling of competition was still strong. Although Mrs. Taft felt that having a home and family made her superior to the brother, she could not escape a marked feeling of inadequacy when she compared her own situation with the brother's independence and effective management of his own life. The older brother and one of the sisters appeared as shadowy forms in her background. There was almost no relationship existing between her and them. There was more of a tie with the sister next older to her, who had shown some understanding of young Mrs. Taft's needs. In fact, it had been this sister who had recognized that a problem of sex adjustment existed with the Tafts
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and had been able to give her some sane advice along this line. Mrs. Taft quickly acknowledged that she and her sisters and brothers had been given all the advantages that a family of means considered important for children twenty-five years ago. They had opportunities to hear good music and had some musical training. She herself had always had an intense and catholic reading interest. She said with real enthusiasm, "I have read all my life—anything and everything." She had been active in all kinds of sports and had been a regular attendant at Sunday school. Throughout her childhood these interests had been furthered and encouraged. And yet she was now convinced that her family, like others, had not given their children much practical preparation for the facing of life's down-to-earth problems. She was also very sure that her college had missed its chance to rectify errors and make good some serious deficiencies. As small children, she and her younger brother were "the little ones," and treated so by their parents. They were surrounded by a very loving, indulgent, adult atmosphere with little direct discipline. She recalls that she made every possible effort to gain the approval of her parents, even going so far as to eat foods she loathed. In contrast, the younger brother was much less of a conformist and was therefore in frequent conflict with the parents. By comparison with her little brother, she was considered a model child. Her satisfaction in this role was not always complete, as she had a slight conscience prick when she recognized the family's unfairness to her brother, whose behavior was often misjudged because of his nonconformity. The great competition between the two children was expressed in constant and bitter quarreling. The older brother and sisters enjoyed showing off the little children to their friends, but always demanded perfection in dress and behavior. The childhood home was the center of activity for neighborhood play. Children flocked there to share the abundance of toys and yard equipment. Projects of all sorts were undertaken. As a child Mrs. Taft got along well with the gang of girls and boys. Her early school experience was equally successful. She made some very good friendships during grade-school days. She worked hard and always conformed and saw clearly
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that she was considered very precocious by the teachers as well as by her family. When she entered high school, Mrs. Taft met her first real failure—a failure in social relationships. Precipitated into so large a school, she felt utterly swamped. She could not make the desired contacts and began to feel intensely inadequate and shy. She feared her teachers and felt she was not accepted by the girls and boys. She was unable to find help in any quarter. Feelingly she said, in one conference at the service: "Mother completely skipped this part of her responsibility. She knew I was terribly unhappy but did nothing to help me, probably because we did not see eye to eye on many- things at that time." As one means of helping her daughter, the mother took her to dancing school, which was a nightmare, for she feared no one would want to dance with her. The younger brother met social situations with far greater ease. As she grew older, participation in extracurricular activities proved a fair substitute for the more appealing personal relations that might have existed between her and her schoolmates. Young people were often entertained in the home, but she found herself more at ease in arranging the details of a party while her brother assumed responsibility for the social aspects. Although she derived somewhat more satisfaction from her last years in high school, this whole time stood out as the first unhappy period in her life. Mrs. Taft realized that her mother had a very unwholesome attitude toward sex which she passed on to her children. Even though her mother prepared her for menstruation and there was no shock accompanying the onset, she was never in doubt as to her mother's exceedingly negative feeling to all matters pertaining to sex adjustment in marriage. When she was ready to marry, her mother gave her some tentative suggestions about contraceptives, but obviously with the attitude always characteristic of her. When she entered college, her old lack of social skill arose to plague her again. The break from her family distressed her. If anything, she suffered more acutely than before from her lack of popularity, shyness, social inadequacy, and sensitiveness. Joining a sorority gave her some status, but being thrown with girls
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more sophisticated than she was produced serious conflict. Her code of ethics was staunchly held and did not permit petting, smoking, or drinking. The girls who "had the best time" indulged, in varying degrees, in all these forbidden things. She felt it her duty to crusade for better morals in her group. At the same time, she realized that she wanted to be accepted by them and that she longed to enjoy the popularity that fell to them. No one helped her in these difficulties, and again she felt baffled in the most important aspects of her living. Eventually she began to date with boys but had no ardent or serious affairs, though her relationships and experiences with boys were pleasant enough. Just after graduating she met Mr. Taft. And now, married, the mother of fifteen-month-old twin boys, still far from secure financially, she was facing a second unplanned pregnancy. Mrs. Taft felt that she was about to be completely submerged in the morass of her problems. Again she recognized her own limitations in meeting difficulties and turned to what she believed the best available help. She felt that there must be some means of working out a solution, if she only knew how and where to begin. Her initial relief from anxiety came when she learned that many babies of the age of her sons were not toilet-trained. The effect of this information on her was similar to that of her obstetrician's assurance that other women as well as she had been slow in making satisfactory sex adjustments. With her own tension relieved, the babies' toilet training seemed to be accomplished quite easily. She was helped to work out a practical schedule based on her own home program—one she knew was possible to live up to. She made an effort to weigh her values and to stop setting up unattainable standards of perfection for everything she did in the house. She learned to stress only the things most vitally important to her. Eventually she relinquished the idea that she ought to do her own housework just to prove that she could do what other women could. To give up this idea was hard for her, however, even after she was financially able to hire outside help. She frequently said that she knew many women who had a large family of children and could still manage their homes far more satisfactorily than she could hers. The simplified schedule helped her to gain satisfaction from
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household activities and from her recognition that she could do the work successfully. Her actual skill increased. As their income increased steadily, there were more social opportunities for them. Under these circumstances the arrival of the second baby, a girl, was a happier and more welcome experience than the birth of the twins had been, though in this second pregnancy she experienced more physical discomfort. With the pick-up in income, it was possible for the Tafts to move to a more desirable neighborhood where the wife had the kind of associations that were interesting to her. As these things developed and her own growth became evident, she could look back and see that when she first came to the service her standards of perfection, her extreme desire to "have everything right," and her failure because of lack of skills, as well as the piling up of difficult situations, had brought her to a point where she was unable to master the problems with which she was confronted. Having once successfully solved this dilemma, Mrs. Taft felt a new confidence in herself which she expressed on several occasions. "I once thought I could never get out of the troubles I was in," she said, "but when I worked those through I learned that it is always possible to overcome difficulties—maybe not in the way you originally thought, but there is a solution. I do not believe I will ever again be faced with a complete impasse, as I then was." Mrs. Taft's adjustment to her husband has grown increasingly satisfactory. She realizes and has accepted his dependence upon her. She has freed herself from her family to a greater degree than she ever believed was possible. Her serious concern now is planning the best kind of education for her children. She has entered into community affairs with considerable interest and zeal. Though for a period during the first years of marriage she was hopeless of achieving any direction for her own life and bitterly resentful of her husband's evident satisfactions in their marriage, when hers were so few, she no longer feels that pursuing a vocation is the only way out. For several years she has been immersed in the education of her children, the companionship of her husband, the life of the community, and her own social activities, and she seems to derive from all these activities
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a sense of being important and of satisfaction in meeting in her own particular way the demands that they make upon her. As we look at Mrs. Taft's case we see that she is a fairly typical woman of her socioeconomic group in characteristics, experiences, and problems. She is of superior intellectual ability, belonging in this respect to the group to whom we look for leadership. It is for men and women of this type that the college sets up its educational program. Without reading the case material about Mrs. Taft, an educator could have predicted many of the circumstances and happenings of her life. He would know that she would grow up in a family, probably as one of several children. He would know that, in common with other girls, she would learn in her home the general pattern of behavior she would carry throughout life. He would know that gradually she would learn to know her world; that she would go to school, learn to adapt herself to its demands and to those of the social group; that at adolescence she would normally establish a relationship with the other sex and free herself from emotional dependence upon her family. He would expect that she would prepare for a vocation; that she would probably eventually give up this vocation in order to marry. In marriage he would expect her to try to get along with her husband, to adjust herself to him sexually, to run a house to the best of her ability, to do a good job of rearing her children, and to bring her interests, ideals, and aspirations into line with the way of life which she had chosen. He would expect her to meet various crises in the course of these developments. With the predictability of the course of life so high for this type of person, should not the education which proposed to prepare her for life have done a better job in equipping her to meet these predictable situations? Her
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parents, too, could have foreseen most of these really important developments in her life, had they been willing or able to view her life as a whole. It would be universally agreed that the education of Mrs. Taft was the joint responsibility of her parents and the schools and college she attended. Neither the parents nor the schools could completely shift to the shoulders of the other the full responsibility for this undertaking, which requires the most persistent, concerted, and intelligent effort during the formative years of an individual's life. Without question, mistakes will always be made, but might they not better be mistakes of commission rather than omission? Perhaps the number of both kinds would be reduced if the question of the aim of education were faced squarely. It is obvious that Mrs. Taft's parents tried to do everything possible for their daughter. They gave her the best, according to the economic and social standards of the time. But knowing what lay ahead, could they not have contributed more to her personal development? Had they taken a long-time view from the very beginning could she not have been better prepared for meeting these important situations with which they knew she would be faced one day? Let us consider the aspects of Mrs. Taft's life which were most meaningful to her. Very early she became confident of her importance to her parents and her older brother and sisters. To be the baby of an admiring family carried with it satisfactions that were inevitably lost when the limelight had to be shared with a little brother. Regardless of the unwillingness of parents to recognize jealousy in their children, every child who must shift his center-of-the-stage position to make way for another
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equally important individual finds himself in a competitive situation. Not only is such a reaction normal but it will also persist and take many different forms throughout life. Parents who have a real understanding of children will face this situation, not only at the birth of every baby after the first one but throughout the years that their children are together. This difficulty and persistent problem is a factor in forming the child's pattern of relationships to others. Realistic understanding of the child's need at this point should be of lasting value to her. Mrs. Taft found that she could maintain the approval of her parents and her important position with them by being the conformist that her brother was not. She even became aware of some parental unfairness to her brother as the result of her own behavior, but her need to be praised, which meant being "first," was too great a need to be denied. Every time she looked back over her life she made a comparison of the relative success of herself and her brother. She referred to herself as a "model child." She, not the brother, was the standard-bearer in early educational achievement. Her techniques were nearly always successful, even though her brother was an ever-present threat to her status. She received the acclaim of the family but felt guilty about it. Mrs. Taft and her brother quarreled bitterly and often, much to the distress of the mother, who seemed unable to do anything to reduce their bickering. Apparently the mother had no idea why two sweet little children should not love each other! Mrs. Taft's feeling of competition with her brother persisted, although it was expressed in different terms from one level of development to another. In adolescence Mrs. Taft faced the fact that her brother
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was far more adequate than herself, socially. Her remarks indicated her recognition of their relative positions. In spite of her own need to participate in social affairs at this time, she found herself withdrawing to the more secure position of preparing the refreshments and urging replenishments on the guests. In college she was aware that her brother willingly modified some of the family's strict standards of behavior. The situation was disturbing to her. Down deep she would have liked to do the same, though she was not entirely willing to admit it to herself. Instead, she clung tenaciously to her standards, throttled her own desires, and reproved her brother. Another odious comparison could be seen in the greater freedom of her brother. In spite of her increased understanding in adult life and her willingness to recognize her brother as an able and effective person, Mrs. Taft still showed competitive feeling in the grudging admiration she expressed for his successful management of his life. "I don't see how John gets along as he does," she said, "when I seem almost completely unable to meet my own problems." At the time, Mrs. Taft was nearly overpowered by the sense of her own failure. As she gradually solved her problems she was able to see her brother in a better light. To feel successful was from her earliest years essential to Mrs. Taft. She found satisfaction in certain achievements which helped to offset the attention paid the little brother. She learned also that techniques of conformity and righteousness insured success and she practiced them in everything, even going so far as to eat foods that she disliked. In her parental home high standards were important and to measure up to them required constant effort. When the older brother and sisters wanted to take the little ones
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among their friends, the younger children were expected to appear and behave "just right." Here again Mrs. Taft felt she had to shine in order to maintain her relative success. In school, too, she maintained high standards. As a bright child she was given special educational privileges of which she proved herself to be entirely worthy. Throughout her schooling she was completely successful in academic achievement. Her standards of success and perfection were well satisfied in this area. Until adolescence her history was a continuous string of successes in whatever she undertook. For the most part even in competition with the younger brother she always came out with flying colors. In spite of the loving care with which she was surrounded, Mrs. Taft was never helped to gain any real understanding of her relation to her brother. Her mother's constant admonition was that she should love her little brother. She did not love him, though she felt she should, and so she felt guilty. She worked out the problem by achieving success at his expense. She was not fully satisfied with the solution, but it was the best she could do. The parents, pleased by the continued success of their fourth child, were not aware of the need to interpret her continued success to her. Failures are an inevitable part of living, yet Mrs. Taft's training took no account of the fact that one day she would have to meet them. To be realistic in facing life is necessary, but it was a lesson she was not taught. Her own good native endowment and the techniques she had developed had always brought her success. Why should failure ever come to her? As the standards of achievement became higher she still achieved success. In the group of superior children with whom she was placed and
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in every other way, as a young child, she succeeded, academically, socially, and personally. Her first actual defeat came in adolescence, and the unfamiliarity of the experience added to her helplessness and bewilderment. Her old techniques would not work. The importance of the problem was responsible to a large extent for the devastating effect of her failure. When she changed to a large high school she found herself unable to establish social contacts. She longed intensely to be accepted by the desirable girls' groups. Her desire to achieve notice among the boys was thwarted, and she was frustrated in the need to establish satisfying heterosexual contacts, a need of paramount importance in adolescence. Nothing seemed to get for her what she wanted. She failed where it was most important to succeed, and no amount of success in other matters alleviated the pain of her failure in this vital part of her life. She needed help, she wanted help, and she sought help from the only source of aid she knew—her parents. In her own poignant words, "they failed me." Though her mother recognized her unhappiness, her immediate response to the girl's urgent request was that there was nothing she could do. She gave her daughter no help in finding ways to meet, understand, or accept this failure. Neither did she help the girl to explore some of the possibilities and to develop the techniques that might have effected an improvement in her social relations. Both the mother and father must have been thoroughly aware that their children would be faced with this problem as they entered adolescence. Surely the parents' failure to give help when it was needed cannot be explained by any unwillingness to meet their children's demands. Nor, in the light of the family background, does it appear to have been
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the result of a laissez-faire attitude. These parents, like limitless numbers of others, were baffled and bewildered by their own inability to give help where it was so urgently needed. The mother's one effort to meet the problem was to take the girl to a dancing school, which seemed only to increase the girl's unhappiness and fear of unpopularity. Mrs. Taft's mother gave her information about menstruation and reproduction, and it is probable that her early sex education was adequate so far as information goes. The mother's own attitude toward sex left much to be desired, and it was always obvious to Mrs. Taft that her mother's sex adjustment had been poor. Since attitudes are subtly but effectively transferred from one member of a family to another, it is to be wondered how much of the mother's abhorrence of sex relations was passed over to her daughter. A residue of this no doubt affected the girl's own sex adjustment. One other point to consider in Mrs. Taft's early experience is her lack of opportunity for participating in housekeeping activities. With maids in the home, the youngsters were never expected to work. Perhaps learning the actual skills of homemaking was less important at that time than acquiring useful attitudes about participation and cooperation in housekeeping. To help and not overhelp, to protect and not overprotect, and to allow children the chance to work out their problems but without letting them bog down completely in their own inexperience and failure are some of the problems on which most parents need intelligent guidance. Parents must work out troubles for themselves, as people must in all phases of their lives. No one else can overcome their difficulties for them. But might not resources too often
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needed by parents but not now available to them be provided, so that they might draw information, understanding, and usable techniques and points of view? Had there been an adviser for these parents to consult, might they not have gained a better understanding of their developing children and at the same time have found ways to work out the situations that were bewildering to adults and youngsters alike? Let us now consider the part that school played in meeting Mrs. Taft's life needs. Quite early the school became aware of her superior intellectual abilities and followed the usual procedure of letting her skip a grade. The effect upon her is shown in the statement she made when planning her children's education. "I'll never make the mistake of letting them skip the twins in school," she said, "I knew I was precocious, and of course I was smug about moving ahead. I then found myself keeping up with the grade standards because I could do it all right, but I became tense as a result. Being put in the special grade for advanced youngsters helped, as I was with children of my own age, but it had its disadvantages because we knew we were good." Apparently the school was trying to provide for the intellectual possibilities of the child. The effect of this policy on the total child was scarcely recognized. Undoubtedly, at this period in education, effort was being made to understand failure, but as yet success was viewed only as a virtue. That success needed to be fitted into the whole developing personality of the child was not then recognized bv the school. Although the Parent-Teacher Association was in existence at that time, it did not seem aware of the possible extent of its function. That schools should improve their
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understanding of children rather than just teach subjects and that some plan was needed to make education for parents an integral part of the school program were matters still uncomprehended. We have seen that the earliest crucial situation for Mrs. Taft was her failure to bridge the social gap in her adolescent development. Anyone who has dealt with adolescents is aware of the importance to them of establishing themselves with their peers at this stage. This need has long been recognized. One's own experience will verify the need. Long-time studies also have produced conclusive evidence on the matter. However, those responsible for Mrs. Taft's education gave no indication that they were aware of her except as an academic entity. They knew nothing of her struggles for acceptance and her failures in social adjustment. Yet they could have foreseen that throughout her life the need for good social adjustment would persist, while academic achievement would for the most part cease to be important after the first twenty years of her life. We do not wish to imply that school success or failure is unimportant during the period when schooling occupies so large a part of life, but only that it is only one aspect of living, and often, to the youngster, the least vital one. Not all children face the situation as logically as one little girl of twelve who said, "I don't know whether I should give up my popularity or let my school work suffer." With a sigh she answered herself, "I suppose for the next few years my main job is to get an education, so I had better let my popularity go for the time being!" Considering Mrs. Taft's eventual need of housekeeping skills, it is interesting to note that neither grade school nor high school gave her any training in homemaking. The
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reports of some of the women indicate that their domestic science work in school first stimulated their interest in housekeeping. Mrs. Taft did not have such an opportunity. Nor did her elementary and high-school education offer any kind of sex education in either attitudes or information. Her courses in biology, physiology, and physical education did nothing to answer the specific questions arising at these various developmental levels. Apparently the school has never seen its function as one of supplementing or augmenting the sex education given in the home, regardless of how inadequate or disturbing it may have been. Mrs. Taft's social problems persisted from high school into and through college. To be sure, she joined an outstanding sorority, a step which was no doubt made easy for her by her family's status in the community. She eventually believed this step to have been a mistake. The other girls were socially skillful and ultrasophisticated. By comparison, her sense of her own inadequacy was aggravated. In addition she was in conflict with the other sorority members over standards of conduct. She held rigidly to a code of behavior that allowed no compromise. She did not believe in smoking; the others did. She completely rejected drinking; the others did not. It is to be expected that any girl who came from a protected, conservative home, as Mrs. Taft did, would have been disturbed by the behavior so prevalent in colleges in the late twenties and that she would have experienced a certain amount of shock when first exposed to the breakdown of old patterns by many free young people. The problem was further confused and the conflict within herself increased by the fact that the other girls were popular and socially accepted, while she was not. Occasionally the thought that her uncompromising position might be a mis-
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take occurred to her, but she had taken her stand on what seemed to her to be right, and she stuck to it. She never realized, nor did anyone ever help her to see, that unconsciously her own lack of success and nonacceptance caused her to project on to the more popular girls much of her own conflict. Their success had to be identified with something undesirable, so she saw their low moral standards as a way to justify her own failure. Thus she gained approval in her own eyes when she failed to get it from the group. It will be recalled that an early childhood technique served her well when it was necessary to her to gain superiority at the expense of her little brother. This technique she now reinstated with some slight variations. Selfrighteousness was again her method, but this time it brought few satisfying results except her own approval. Baffled and frustrated, she longed for a place to which to turn for guidance in meeting this problem. Her mother would not understand; she had not understood before. The sorority mother was a sweet but ineffectual old lady. If she turned to the dean of women she would be giving the others away for breaking rules. There was no one who understood how to help her. Fumblingly, she struggled through her college years—unwilling to quit, believing she should uphold her personal standards and those of the sorority with which she was identified, having little understanding of herself, and suffering continuous failure. Mrs. Taft's academic success was unquestionable. The work was satisfying in itself, but not enough so to offset the terrific sense of failure that she felt in one of the basic areas of her life. The statement that she was prepared for life by her college education can be challenged by what her subsequent life experiences reveal.
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If education for women is to be entirely vocational, a few colleges have fulfilled this purpose adequately, others have failed. If education is to develop avocational interests in an understanding of history, philosophy, the arts, and literature, some colleges have succeeded, others have failed. But if education is to prepare women for life, there is evidence that colleges have failed almost completely. Most women today plan to have some vocational experience, and we recognize the importance of their being prepared for such experience. For a few women a vocation is as important a part of life as it is for men. But most women give up their vocational pursuits after a short period of time. For such women vocational education alone is not adequate; nor is it adequate for men or for women who follow a career throughout life, if the goal of education is preparation for life. Neither can the classical Liberal Arts course prepare for life, especially when, as is too often true of such courses, it cannot legitimately be considered either liberal or artistic. The liberal education which is the basic conception of higher education in colleges purports to give students wide interests and to challenge and stimulate them to continue intellectual pursuits. That an understanding of himself and the world in which we live should enable the student to interpret much of the life he will live has long been the hope of education. Too often the interpretation falls short of the mark, and what persists is not a background of understanding with which to meet the inevitabilities of life but only some vague and feeble potential avocational interests. The ability to interpret is too often considered inherent in the intelligent being. We know from experiments that a transfer of learning takes place only where similarities exist in the materials learned. To think that we can safely leave
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the inexperienced person to the interpretation of his life situations, with only his accumulation of factual data to help him, is to indulge in wishful thinking only. Consider the case of Mrs. Taft. How far has her factual information helped her in her personal relations with her husband, children, relatives, and friends? Has it helped her to understand and to tackle intelligently the situations thrust upon her by life? Last, but not least, has it given her a better understanding of herself? Shortly after graduation from college, Mrs. Taft met Mr. Taft, and they soon became engaged. There was another man in whom she was interested, but the rivalry was short-lived. The long engagement, necessary for financial reasons, was a difficult strain for both of them. Neither in her choice of a mate nor in adjusting herself to the strain of a long engagement did she have any help or guidance. One father thus aptly described this kind of situation to his daughter: "You are an excellent shopper and can usually select a good coat. If you have made a mistake you can return the coat or give it away. But you know far less about choosing a husband than you do about buying a coat. If you make a mistake you can not return him or give him away without much heartache. I don't want to take away the romance and excitement of getting engaged, but I do want you to mix some sanity and intelligence with your romance. Goodness knows you have little enough preparation." Mrs. Taft, like other women of her kind, took one of the most important steps of her life with little if any serious consideration. As she said, "Probably the chief reason I married my husband was because he pursued me harder than the other man." Parents and educators know that most men and women
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will one day select mates. Will elders continue to evade their responsibility and fail to offer young people specific education for a choice that is so important and has such far-reaching results? Mrs. Taft might have worked out some of her adjustments before marriage with far less crippling effects had she been helped to a better understanding of herself and others. She was extremely desirous of making the most of her marriage and was willing to tackle with energy and intelligence whatever problems or situations she met. For her, every failure and every effort which was not successful according to the standard she had set was followed by a sense of personal inadequacy. The result was an overpowering frustration. Mrs. Taft, like most other people, was unaware of the tremendous residue from her early experiences, attitudes, and beliefs which formed a part of her personality and affected her behavior, motivations, and attitudes to such an extent that a completely objective and rational approach to the situations confronting her was difficult if not impossible. As a result of her early and consistent successes she had set up for herself a standard of achievement approaching perfection which she struggled to maintain. She believed she could do anything. When she found she could not she was nonplussed. Never at any time during the years when she was growing up was she helped to gain an understanding of the limitations of her techniques and her perfectionist standards. Her relationship with her brother, the attitudes and approval of her parents, and her unhappy social experiences in early adolescence and later in college all left their mark, reflected in her attitudes, aspirations, and behavior. Doubt-
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less her parents had hoped to prepare her for life, but evidently they had no true realization of the nature of the preparation she was actually receiving. As Mrs. Taft approached the time of her marriage she became acutely conscious of her inadequate sex education. Desiring to make a satisfactory sex adjustment in marriage, she turned to the medical department of her college for guidance. Though she disliked consulting the school physician on such a matter, she believed it was the thing to do. Pocketing her inhibitions and plucking up her courage, she did so. The results were unfortunate and embarrassing. Not only did she fail to receive the information she sought; she was teased and ridiculed as well. Here the college completely failed in preparing her for an important aspect of her life. Soon after marriage she realized her lack of success with sexual adjustment. Her older sister and her married friends gave her some help, but Mrs. Taft was completely baffled by her husband's unwillingness to read the printed material they gave her. His refusal may possibly be explained by his own feeling of insecurity about their sex relations; he may have thought that instruction was useless in such matters; or possibly he was reluctant to admit his ineptitude or to allow his wife to take the initiative in a matter where traditionally it was his prerogative to do so. In view of the unwholesome sex attitudes of her mother and her lack of any adequate sex education, the prognosis for Mrs. Taft's sex adjustment in marriage was poor. However, had her husband been willing to help her to work out the problem a satisfactory adjustment might have been achieved much sooner. Following the setback of her unwanted pregnancy and the birth of her third child, she
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again sought help, this time from her obstetrician. Her relief was great when he assured her that her experience was not unique, and the books he gave her to read were very helpful. Moreover, though her husband never admitted reading them, there were indications that he had done so and was making use of certain ideas gained from them. Thus, after many rebuffs and fruitless efforts, her persistent attempts to find some solution to this problem were at last rewarded. A second major adjustment was giving up the work for which she was prepared to undertake an entirely different way of life for which she had received no training. Her college had prepared her well to follow her vocation, but neither the college nor her parents had prepared her for giving up her vocation. It was the general expectation that she would give up her vocation after marriage. Only she was disappointed and nonplussed. While preparing for her vocation she had learned to look upon it as tremendously important. Suddenly she was required to abandon it. To see her husband happy in his wife, his children, his home, and his life work, which continued as before his marriage, raised persistent conflicts in her. She too wanted a life work in which she could succeed. When she first came to the Advisory Service she felt that she was failing in her new work as homemaker. She could not bear to see herself fail in what she honestly believed to be a tremendously important undertaking—home and family—yet she was in no respect achieving her goals in this undertaking. She had been so sure that anyone with intelligence could easily acquire the techniques of housekeeping and managing a home that preparation for these tasks had seemed absurd to her. In her parents' home she had scarcely been conscious that any effort went into the smooth fune-
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tioning of the home. To her chagrin she soon found, in keeping her own house, that nothing "just happened" without plenty of planning and effort. Her unskilled efforts never produced the desired results. She always kept before her the picture of a smooth-running home; pleasant, leisurely meals; a beautifully appointed table; and an unflustered, gracious wife and mother. Such a picture contrasted harshly with the reality in her own home. She was unable to appreciate that to become thoroughly at home with household skills requires time and practice, and she expected that she would at once be able to turn out a finished and skilled job of homemaking. She compensated for her failure to do so by insisting that she could and would do all her own household work and would prove to herself that it was possible, in spite of the unusual complications of her situation. Further difficulties arose because she was faced with training her infants at the same time she was learning to keep house. Like most young mothers, she desired to give her children the best possible care and training. The high standards that she held for herself were extended to the behavior and appearance of her youngsters. Keeping the babies in pastel colors was one of her ambitions but this kept her ironing for hours. She was able to shift her goals when she was convinced that they were too ambitious. Mrs. Taft's sense of social inadequacy returned in her dissatisfaction with the level of her entertainment, which she felt was not up to standard. Low income and lack of household help and housekeeping skills were factors in her dissatisfaction, but her real concern was over her lack of social talent. It would be difficult to say whether her entertaining was really deficient, for her standards of perfection were as evident in this matter as in others. No doubt her condi-
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tioning in adolescence had accentuated her feeling of inadequacy in social situations and given her a mind-set toward social failure. In a way, her very standards of perfection motivated her to seek means of achieving success, but they caused her many frustrations as well. One may speculate on what the outcome would have been had she given up as futile her diligent search for solutions to her difficulties. Often her calls for help met with no response. Had they always done so, probably she would in time have become discouraged, as would the most dauntless individual. Mrs. Taft herself expressed this idea. She had almost reached the point of believing there was no help to be had, and since she herself had done all she knew how to do, the situation seemed nearly hopeless. But having once worked through such a dilemma, she had benefited by more than the solution to her current difficulties. She had come to the realization also that from then on she would never again feel herself unable to arrive at a solution to her problems. She said that she knew now that she must consider more than her failures. Henceforth she would be able to consider them in relation to the total situation. It seems reasonable to suppose that if she had had similar help in working out some of the problems that arose in high school or college she might have acquired this confidence earlier. One very important thing she felt sure she had learned from her experience was that the kind of help one needed was usually available if one looked long and hard enough for it. Her eagerness to state her ideas on education can be understood, in the light of her feeling that her own education had not in any way prepared her to meet her immediate and vital problems. She wanted to let others know of its shortcomings.
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Perhaps the most effective and far-reaching help Mrs. Taft received from the service was the insight she gained into herself and, as a result, the realignment she made of her ideals, aspirations, and goals in keeping with the realities of her situation and her own nature. The specific help in household scheduling, child training, and social contacts would have had only temporary effects had they not served the purpose that might have been accomplished less wastefully by her early education. Mrs. Taft succeeded and failed, succeeded and failed, as does every individual. In each new difficult situation she attacked her problems actively. She recognized the matters on which she needed help after her own methods proved ineffective. Her parents wanted to help her, tried to help her, but were unable to do so. The elementary school satisfied her need to succeed. The secondary schools completely ignored her real problems. The college, too, ignored her social need. It even dealt harmfully with her normal request for help —the request of an intelligent girl who believed that she should approach every new phase of life with the best preparation possible. The point of view expressed here is not that education should make life easy. Life cannot be made easy. Nor would we remove struggle even if we could do so, since struggle and the overcoming of difficulties are basic to the development and tempering of character. But to see more clearly and to understand more completely the vital needs of each developing individual; to help parents to see the true importance of recognizing these needs; to become familiar with the danger spots common to the lives of all persons; to provide means by which young people may learn through experience how to meet life—
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these are the obligations of education. To provide these insights and these means is not enough. Young people must know that such help is available and that they may seek help without meeting obstruction or misunderstanding. The life of Mrs. Taft followed a course which certainly might be duplicated in the lives of many women similar to her in socioeconomic opportunities, in intelligence, and in education. She is typical of the one hundred college women studied. The findings of this study leave no doubt that education did little if anything to prepare her or the rest of the women of the group to meet their actual life problems.
Chapter CHANGING FOR
M
Six E D U C A T I O N
W O M E N
of higher learning have made great strides since the beginning of this investigation ten years ago. None of them would claim, however, that they had achieved their ideal in education for women. The findings and generalizations growing out of this study, it is hoped, may give impetus to every institution which enrolls women students to evaluate critically what it is doing in both the curricular and institutional organization and to review its basic philosophy for its women students. The generalizations which follow are the authors' interpretation of possible corrections which would seem worthy of consideration, based entirely upon this limited intensive study of one hundred college women. This interpretation of the data as presented in the preceding chapters seems to the authors to have definite application to these women. They do not assume that such a limited study as this has complete general application. They also recognize that in the institutions which these women represented there may have been changes to the extent that relatively few of the interpretative generalizations made here have application at the present time. ANY INSTITUTIONS
The suggestions for women's education based upon these
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data are raised more as questions than as dogmatic criticisms of any particular institution or of the field in general. They are grouped under two divisions: suggestions which seem to apply to education in general and those which have more specific application to particular fields of knowledge. OBSERVATIONS
ON
EDUCATION
IN
GENERAL
Better selection and training of teachers.—Let us consider first the college instructional staff. For the undergraduate woman student the teacher is of greater significance than the subject matter of a particular course; this has always been true. One outstanding criticism which these women made of their college education was the fact that instructors and professors seemed to be employed on the basis of their interest in course content, without regard for their teaching ability and their interest in the student as a person. This would seem to imply the need for the elimination from instructional staffs, insofar as possible, of those individuals whose personal qualifications of temperament, emotional stability and general personality, and interest in the human side of their jobs are below certain rccognized standards. There is constant indication that either young assistants who were mainly concerned with getting their own graduate work out of the way or professors absorbed with their research and subject matter were for the most part the instructors of this group of women. In the training of young men and women to go into education as a profession, more adequate and realistic experience seems indicated as a part of their preparation. It is not unlikely that, in addition to more and improved practice teaching, young people in training would be greatlv strengthened if they were required to have a year of ex-
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perience in their chosen field, outside of the academic situation, before employment as teachers was open to them. To be sure, some colleges of education have done much to crack the conservatism of hidebound Liberal Arts curricula, but even here more critical evaluation needs to accompany such changes in order to make sure the changes result in improvement. Let us consider now elementary and secondary teachers who are trained in colleges for their subsequent work. As teachers in service the women in our study expressed themselves as having had little actual help from the large number of courses which they took in Education. These elective or required subjects were mentioned most frequently as being the courses of least value, overlapping in their content, and far removed from the practical situations which confronted these women during their actual teaching experience. That teachers at all levels ought to know and understand the physical, psychological, and social aspects of child and adolescent and the development of youth in the family seems to us to have been adequately demonstrated in the preceding chapters. As long as the teaching personnel is recruited largely from a surplus supply of single women who plan to stay in the profession only a short time, education can hardly hope to build up the degree of permanence and effectiveness of teaching that is necessary for the ultimate achievement of most of the aims of education. It is our own feeling that less turnover of teaching staff in the precollege years would add to the staff's effectiveness. This might be accomplished to some extent by employing more men and married women for grade and high-school work. How to weed out poor teachers is a problem both for the
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administrators of public schools and for college administrators in relation to their own teaching staff. In the former case, lack of money for salaries and inertia enter in; whereas in the latter, the interest seems to be less in retaining staff for their teaching qualifications than in retaining them for their research, lecturing, and writing qualifications. Counseling or advisory service for students which are functionally but not administratively related to psychiatric or academic departments.—The most frequently mentioned and recurrent need seen in the histories of these women is for informal advisory service throughout high school and college. Several deficiencies stand out: First, their colleges were seemingly not utilizing the staff resources available for student guidance. Guidance has had too much of an academic tinge or has been purely vocational placement. Second, the more elaborate services for students, even when present on the campus, were avoided by most of the women when their problems were of an intimate or personal nature. Third, the close tie-up between student counseling service and punitive and administrative and psychiatric divisions of the institution scared away all but those who found themselves in a scholastic or mental and emotional jam. Unless they were in desperation, the students tended to avoid the services. Fourth, specific services, such as the health department, many times did not have enough breadth of understanding of the total situation confronting a student at the time she consulted them. Many cases revealed actual naïveté, carelessness, and incompetence on the part of health-service specialists. Fifth, there was too little coordination between health,
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nutrition, recreation, physical education, academic, and other agencies, resulting in piecemeal and poor service to the student. In many institutions where coordinated student services might have been expected to function in reducing student difficulties, they ignored preventive possibilities and operated primarily on a remedial basis. That is, help was forthcoming only for the student who was actually physically or mentally ill or in some social or academic difficulty. Many of these women report going an entire year without obtaining help from university specialists, even when these were sought. An example in point is in the case of Mrs. Taft, page 194. Sixth, it seems that the women who obtained the most help with their social, emotional, and academic problems obtained it from faculty members outside the usual counseling setup. Such help, although sometimes good, is likely to be untrained and, therefore, dangerously naïve. It must, of course, be recognized that many institutions have tackled this problem more realistically during the past ten years. The experience of this group, however, is that they had little and often very bad guidance in college. A curriculum designed to meet more adequately the needs of women students.—It seemed evident in our study that whatever kind of curriculum a woman majored in, she found herself confused. While it is true that one cannot study everything, it is also true that the curriculum can relate itself in a realistic way to the needs of women. The Liberal Arts students, in many cases, were unable to operate successfully on a job or in their personal and family situations without further graduate study or supplementary courses and informal adult education. The technicalprofessional trained women found themselves likewise floundering with personal and family adjustments and at a
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disadvantage in civic, social, and public affairs. The question raised by this situation is whether there should be more than one undergraduate curriculum for women or whether schools which label themselves Liberal Arts, Home Economics, General Science, or what not, do not need to look at their programs to see whether they are giving balanced diets to their students. The so-called broad Liberal Arts curriculum was not, in many cases, broad at all when viewed in relation to these women's life needs; and neither was the Practical Arts and Science curriculum broad or practical when viewed by this same criterion. Nearly every woman who goes through a college or university is going to work, associate with people, marry and have a family, make decisions which affect education and civic progress and social conditions in the country, and in a hundred other ways participate as a free agent in a democratic form of government. How can any education that does not closely parallel her developing life needs be in any sense realistic? Less rigidity in courses of study and in sequence of courses.—There is shown to be a need for greater flexibility in requirements for college entrance and in selection of courses during college. Many of the courses taken by these women had little functional value for them, because they apparently presupposed that all students were going to be specialists in the field. Why, for example, should all women of undergraduate level who want some knowledge of nutrition and food selection and preparation be required to take dietetics as a prerequisite which, traditionally, requires many hours of inorganic and organic chemistry, in addition to requirements in other fields? Think of the thousands of women who do and will graduate from institutions of higher learning with no courses in chemistry. Where
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do they learn about foods and nutrition? It is true that, after college, women's magazines, newspapers, cooking schools, adult homemaking classes, and other means are available and patronized by thousands. Neither is the fact overlooked that to many college authorities a knowledge of diet, as a factor in health maintenance, has no place as a part of higher education. Much is and could be offered in high school. But at present, girls in high school are restricted to taking courses required for college and are seldom able to take the more practical courses. Departmental isolation was another handicap. There was little relating of subject matter in one field to that in the student's other fields. When a student left Economics II and entered her class in physics, she usually went from one world into a completely different and unrelated one. In the light of the evidence of this group of women, two procedures would seem desirable. First, that of relating each subject taught to other fields of knowledge. What value has French, when it has no relation to English, history, political science, and so on, except as an intellectual exercise? The lives of these women were not lived in compartments. They could not leave their biology and psychology at home while they were attending a lecture on Egyptian art. Students are expected to do their own relating of these different fields. But learning in an abstract situation does not guarantee the ability to make application in other abstract or practical fields. A class of thirty women, all of whom had passed, with good grades, college inorganic and organic chemistry and physics, were asked to give six examples of the application of chemistry and physics to household management. As simple as this might seem to the professor of chemistry or physics, not a single girl could give and discuss a single principle involved until they were given examples by the
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instructor, and then they could not give the principles involved. One method, reported by one woman, for partially overcoming this difficulty was a system of interdepartmental seminars organized around topics of practical interest and discussed by students from the physical, social, and biological sciences as well as from the fine arts. Help to the student in making the transition from home and high school to college.—Most of these women found their freshman year at college their most difficult one. Several factors were associated with this. First, it was their first break from dependence upon family. They had to assume responsibility for themselves in a wholly new way. Second, actual course work was more difficult than in high school, teachers were more impersonal, and the women's study habits were inefficient. Third, there was much anxiety over the possibility of failure, which resulted in minor physical and emotional upsets. Fourth, social adjustments, such as those in relation to men, dating, and sororities, brought both satisfaction and frustration. Many of the transition problems which these women met should have been prepared for in the high school prior to their entrance to college. It would seem that those students anticipating entrance to college should be helped to make a wise selection of school in terms of their abilities and interests. There should be some orientation toward the kind of work and study method which will confront them. This can be best done by the high school itself, organizing its senior year of work on a more self-sufficient basis. Also, one should not lose sight of the fact that from forty to eighty percent do not go on to college. The problem of break from the family is a joint family, high-school, and college responsibility. The family must help the child to become less and less dependent upon
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them. The high school could do more actual education of the parents of their students. And the college should be a little less objective and impersonal in its relationship to the student. The assumption on the part of many of the colleges attended was that the young people entering are mature adults. They are not mature; they are just in the process of growing up and assuming adult responsibility. They are in the beginning of the hardening-off process. The remark of one professor to Mrs. Denne, that he had Bunked forty percent of his freshman English class, seems to evidence lack of understanding on his part, especially in view of his apparent feeling of satisfaction with himself. No manufacturing plant would throw out forty percent of its basic raw material. The dormitory or house mother, student counseling services, and upper-class students have strategic roles to perform. The freshman year is the most important year for the student, as far as success or failure is concerned. The campus of any college seems to be buzzing with social activity, but not all students contribute to the buzzing; a large proportion of these women found little actual help in their adjustment to men, in overcoming their social shyness and insecurity, and in having enough of the right kind of desired social life. A few students were in everything, whereas others had little or no opportunity for extracurricular participation. Their fear of reciting in class and of examinations could be relieved by various methods. The instructor might use the examination more as a means of instruction than as a means of testing. He should try to bring out the more reticent student through a kind of question that at first will insure success on the part of the student. He will need to use skill in interpreting answers to questions in a positive rather than in a cynical or sarcastic manner. Classes in
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speech could be a help to all students, since speech has the possibility of being as important a tool subject as any other. Students' fears might also be relieved by the encouragement of writing in freshman English classes in such a way that the expressing of ideas per se would receive more critical attention than such errors as incorrect spelling which, as the individual gains an appetite for writing, he will overcome. Words, language, and finding sources of information can be exciting if there is a proper relating of these to life experiences. This eagerness to express himself may be already ablaze in the student, but more often it must be kindled by the skill of the teacher. By skill is meant both the way in which he organizes and illustrates his subject and how well he understands and teaches students as well as subject matter. The application of the simplest principles of educational psychology in relation to freshman class teaching might bring surprising results. Attention to organization of student life in relation to academic life and attention to student adjustments in other ways.—These young women entered college with widely differing backgrounds. Some came from rich, some from average, and some from poor homes. They also attended colleges which were diverse as to the richness of their physical plant and quality of personnel. But the fact remains that to whatever kind of institution the woman went she was transplanted from one culture to another in much the same sense that one is when moving from Maine to Alabama or from Manhassett to Story City. The conditions of living, the technological equipment with which she works, the language of the instructors in different sciences and arts, the social customs and the mores are different from that of her family background. This situation reëmphasizes the importance of the freshman year. She has the problem
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of becoming adjusted to this new set of cultural symbols and followings. Sometimes she succeeds moderately, and then again she flounders badly with one or the other of the elements of her new environment. It may be the language of geology, the customs in dating, or other situations which trouble her. The lives of many women suggest that attention should be given to such things as size of classes, dormitory and other living arrangements, extent of participation in extracurricular activities by students, and close and articulate association between the student and the sources of help available to her. More attention might also be given to ways in which students could actually participate at least as temporary parts of the community in which the college is situated. There are social agencies, other educational institutions, civic activities, business problems of a great variety, and many other community projects in which students might become active. The actual classroom load should, of course, be limited so that there is time for so-called laboratory activities. Usually only the student who is going into social work or who takes practice teaching has any contact with community life, except attendance at movies or church. Such a close relationship to real life might do a great deal to broaden the character of extracurricular activities and might greatly vitalize classroom work. In view of the subsequent kinds of experience which women have to meet, extracurricular activities should make one of the most important contributions to later life. These activities could provide much training for actual life situations. Where the opportunity exists, many college women, in school and after graduation, are eager for the chance to do something which is vital and important. As summer
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volunteers and volunteers after college they find a kind of fulfillment and satisfaction which they get in no other way.1 As a guidance technique while women are in college, these real responsibilities of an extracurricular nature have many possibilities. The college might be viewed as a little world involving many kinds of people engaged in different activities. Could some reallocating of physical and human relationships constructively affect the learning situations and the students' adjustment and growth? One example of what is meant is the organization of departmental seminars, as previously mentioned, whereby students majoring in medicine, law, home economics, the arts, or some branch of science are brought into contact for the purpose of discussing questions of significance to all. This shift in the organization of college procedure might help to break down some of the bad effects of too rigid departmental segregation. Theoretically, according to courses in education, the curriculum includes the total life situation of the student, and the manipulation of any part of it should be considered material which the teacher and administrator can utilize to facilitate effective learning and change. Practically, the imagination many times becomes cramped by certain crystallized patterns of educational thinking and practice. Educators should not lose sight of the fact that the curriculum is not just French, English, physics, and so on, but that it should become a living reality, flowing into and through the students' extra-classroom experiences. Education for parents of students.—Our evidence very clearly points to the family situation as of strategic educational importance. The personality development of the child at an early age, his techniques for meeting all kinds 1
See Appendix B, p. 276.
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of human relationships, and his attitude and facility in meeting other life situations are initiated and more or less determined by family relationships. It would seem that no real progress could be made with these aspects of the individual's education until the school system envisions and adopts some policy for including adult-parent education and counseling as a part of its program, while at the same time training the students to become better parents. This would necessitate in many instances the employment of additional teachers and teachers with a different kind of training and experience from that of the classroom instructor. They should be thoroughly adequate in their understanding of child growth and development, of the psychology of human relationships, and of family life. This educational program with parents should begin when the child enters nursery school or kindergarten and continue as the child progresses through the grades and high school. The expense would seem to be great but the cost might partially be saved by reductions in the expense for the clinics and other remedial agencies now in existence, as well as by the elimination of futile subject-matter courses. The greater saving and the important saving would be in the kind of product resulting from such a school system. The school, as well as parents, children, and society, would derive some benefits. Postcollege adult education.—Another aspect of adult education arises from the need which young people face after they have finished school. There is a need for continuing vocational guidance and training, for counsel on personality adjustments and in the realm of courtship, engagement, marriage, child-rearing, and those areas of life adjustments which have to do with interests and outlets of a social and recreational nature. While a part of the worn-
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an's education which contributes to her effectiveness along these lines takes place in her early years, there is need for constant rééducation and continuing education as the person meets the same set of experiences at different stages of development. At present, remedial and other professional persons and agencies handle most of the problems only after the individual has had serious difficulty. If education cannot reduce individual failures and the need for dependence upon remedial agencies, it is not performing one of its most important functions. Educational offerings adapted to changing periods of individual's development.—Reexamination of what schools offer at different periods of the individual's life is necessary. These women gave evidence of a need for a repetition of education on the same subject at different times. Sex instruction affords a good example. Often people think that if they give the child a book to read when he is ten or twelve years old or if he takes a course in sex education at college he has been educated in this field. All students of children recognize that what the individual needs and will assimilate in a practical way varies with his age. The child may have his questions answered favorably at the age of four or five, learn all the proper names of his body functions, and the fact that his mother and father are different; but at ten or twelve his need for reinterpretation of facts and values is different. He needs additional information of another sort. As he grows toward late adolescence, relationships with boys and men bring a different connotation to sex education from the connotation at six or twelve. Later, when marriage is undertaken, sex education has still other needs to satisfy. Still later, as the person's own children come, the need is of a different character. The parent needs to have had not only good sex
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education himself but the knowledge of his children's needs and the ability to teach, in cooperation with the school and other agencies, what his children need at these different stages. One should not infer that the school can anticipate all the experiences in the life of an individual and give him the specific knowledge and skill with which to meet them. It can, however, educate in terms of known usual life situations common to all women and make a greater effort to embrace education in a much broader way. In theory the school does touch upon all the important areas of life experience, but in practice there seems to be lacking real coordination and integration of effort, directed toward a single objective, within and among homes, schools, and the myriad of informal educational agencies in community life, as well as course coordination within the college. Better social organization of education would seem to be imperative if real progress is to result.
Education of men should take into account their need to understand and live in a world with women and children.— Men are as great a barrier to progress in women's education as are women themselves. Two kinds of data substantiate this statement. In the first place, the husbands of these women are still living with a cultural ideology of the past generation with reference to women's role and function in society. The women themselves, who have had to make some kind of adjustment to changing societal patterns and expectancies, seem more aware of progress and change as it is affecting their lives than do their husbands. Being forced to make alterations in their societal role, women, while frustrated and temporarily inadequate, are aware of change, of new demands, of increased opportunities and responsibilities.
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In the second place, the men of this group seem to have had little, if any, educational background which gave them a point of view and understanding of themselves, of women in general, of the cultural role of each sex, and of changes which are occurring and altering the old established order. Their ideas and attitudes about women are of the past century, even though their economic and technological ideas are modern and progressive. As far as facing life is concerned, it seems fair to say that men are less adaptable than women, less progressive and alert to newer ideas being incorporated into their regime, and that they expect their wives to make most of the adjustments which have to be made. One outstanding observation from studying the lives of women is the need for a different kind of education of men—not professional, but cultural and personal-functional. They are often intolerant, naïve, egocentric, spoiled children in their roles as husband and father. They are impatient, irritable, and intolerant. They not only are not open-minded to change but they resist every effort of their wives to improve different situations. Wives are continually seeking help on child care and training, sex adjustment, personal compatibility problems, and the like, while their efforts are resisted by their husbands. An evaluation of the way in which college alumnae affect progressive change in education.—Two points seem clear as far as these alumnae are concerned. Women seem to have few if any educational contacts after graduation from college and are thus a barrier or at least not a help to progressive change in education. While a few institutions attempted to maintain some continuous contact with their graduates, this seems less vital and important than it would be if their graduates maintained continuous con-
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tacts with educational thought and need in their respective communities. On the other hand, many women seem unwilling to have education take a form other than the form which they experienced. Even though they often intellectually realize that the institutions from which they graduated met few of their needs as to type of education and have made few changes since, they are emotionally set on having their daughters attend the schools from which they themselves graduated. Nostalgia seems to overrule intelligent consideration. The need for every institution to have a philosophy of education for women and a clear comprehension of its relation to woman's changing role in contemporary American life.—All institutions of higher learning which enroll women students need to have a philosophy of education for women. In addition, they need to have a clear-cut conception of the way in which their philosophy affects the life of the student during college and following graduation. The group of women studied represented both women's and coeducational schools, both private and public, both small and large. It appears that a much more well-defined philosophy about woman and her role and function in our culture was prevalent among the graduates of the private women's colleges than among graduates of public coeducational universities. One might not approve the particular brand of indoctrination of a Vassar, Wellesley, or Smith graduate, but the fact seems clear that these institutions do brand their graduates. (We recognize, of course, the selective factor which at the outset attracts certain kinds of student.) Public colleges and universities, except colleges of home economics, gave little evidence of having any special philosophy of women's education.
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It would appear that in women's colleges and colleges of home economics the college presidents and deans of home economics are the source of the kind of institutional atmosphere and philosophy about women in American life and education. The graduates of one college appear to be restless to do something in social science and international peace movements; those from another, to achieve status in a professional career; others follow the line of least resistance and go to college and acquire no ongoing urge in life; while some by choice follow home economics and family-life interests. The great fallacy in all of this seems to be that in some instances many frustrations and conflicts resulted from students' newly acquired educational stimulation, due to the fact that the concept of women's education is too narrowly conceived; whereas in other instances the institutions had apparently never thought at all about a welldeveloped philosophy of education for women. It is hard to describe the specific way in which these philosophies affect women's later life. In many cases the women had obtained a set of achievement goals in such a way as to make marriage and family incompatible with their acquired needs, and vice versa. As to philosophy of education for women, the respective colleges seem to fall into the following divisions; those institutions with a specific philosophy about woman's role and function in contemporary American life, which is primarily that of a wife, mother, and homemaker to the exclusion of other functions; those with a philosophy which is primarily directed toward creating for women a set of career achievement goals to the exclusion of other possible functions; those which set for women certain social-service or primarily social-satisfaction goals as a basis for success;
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and those which set for women no goals or give little thought to the unique kind of education that she should have, accept women into a program of education designed for men, and tolerate them as long as they are no threat to the social or academic status of men students. O B S E R V A T I O N S ON S P E C I F I C OF KNOWLEDGE
FIELDS
The way in which different fields of knowledge were grouped into curricula varied widely among the institutions from which these women graduated. Agreement might be arrived at with reference to the grouping of what are usually termed the sciences, the arts, and the humanities. Interdepartmental correlation and the organization of campus life in relation to the academic success of the student are matters which have often been discussed. The purpose of the following paragraphs is to suggest a few concrete ways in which specific fields of knowledge might more adequately have met the needs of the women studied in this investigation. There seemed to be poor coordination of work which might have contributed to better student health during college and after graduation from college.—From a study of the lives of these women after they graduated from college it is difficult to say to what extent their college and precollege experiences contributed to improved health practices. The evidence did not seem to indicate that there was great correlation of fields of knowledge related to health to the end that the woman herself was benefited. It is taken for granted, we presume, that the primary function of those departments in universities and colleges concerned with health and recreation is to give instruction and to relate their programs so that young women will be
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helped to acquire and maintain for themselves normal health and a reasonably satisfactory recreational life both in and after college. Considering the high percentage of this group of women who went through school and part of their adult life with the kinds of physical difficulty reported, the following questions seem pertinent: 1. W a s there abnormal physical development during infancy and childhood? 2. Did poor health habits develop during childhood and adolescence? 3. W a s the weakened condition due to disease? 4. W e r e physical activity programs inadequate? 5. Was health supervision in college adequate? 6. Can college life favor the formation of proper health habits? 7. Was there lack of knowledge, on the part of college authorities, of the actual essentials for good health or a feeling that health is an individual and not a college responsibility? 8. W e r e available health facilities applicable to women's needs? 9. Did girls fail to recognize their needs or to take advantage of the facilities available? 10. W e r e facilities so independent and uncorrelated as to be of little real benefit to the student?
It is our feeling that the health situation would be improved by a more realistic understanding of women and relatively less concern with subject matter, requirements, sequences, prerequisites, and majors and minors; by a less superficial type of medical examination, repeated throughout the college life of the student; and by a much closer correlation of those departments of the university which should contribute directly to healthful living. The college girl has a past when she enters as a freshman. What her own mother, who may have been a college
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graduate, did to her from the time of conception throughout her infancy may be significant both in her physical development and in her conditioning toward the factors of health and physical development. The wrong things learned from her mother and her childhood pals and all the many right things never learned handicap her through college and later life unless somewhere she "unlearns" the one group and learns the other. At puberty the onset and establishment of the normal menstrual function, biological understanding of herself as a woman, and the acquiring of a more mature understanding and practice of hygienic living are important developments. Then at the college age and just past it come the new experiences, stresses, strains, problems, adjustments, and anxieties attendant to the development of normal heterosexual relationships, to engagement, to the consummation of marriage, to the physical and emotional demands of marriage, and to pregnancies and childbearing. What seems clear is that many of the health problems that were fundamental in the lives of these adult college women were taken to college with them, were not discovered during this four-year experience, and continued to persist after college, along with a few new ones which they acquired during college. This does not mean that college contributed nothing to the health of those who attended but it does suggest that it perhaps did not make as great a contribution along lines of student health as might have been possible. There was little correlation between social, cultural, and recreational life opportunities after college and the kind of education and social training received in college.—In no area is there more need for education than in that having to do with the avenues of creative expression and out-
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lets which women may pursue after college. One is immediately prompted to turn to the curriculum of higher education itself to see what physical education, mental hygiene, and related subjects contribute to the lives of women after graduation. What we find is that little was added to the physical, recreational, and social activities of these women after college entrance and by the time they entered their senior year they had dropped most of the activities which they had brought from high school except possibly tennis, swimming, and hiking. After graduation from college about the only things which they were able to carry on were swimming, hiking, and golf. Thus, as far as making a positive contribution to the needs for creative outlets and expression, there would seem to be much room for improvement. How much of what is offered in courses in health, physical education, and mental hygiene is based upon the need of the girls at the time of their college life? How much is based upon an understanding of their needs following graduation from college? It is difficult in these days when closer integration and correlation of subject-matter fields, is being attempted to know just how wide a scope the physical education group would give to their work. Is the health field to be strictly confined to a corrective gymnastic physical-activity set of courses, or does it expect to include recreational and creative fields of learning and the psychological as well as the physical aspects of health education and adjustments? If of the former type, how far are these other departments of the college brought into a coordinated program in the interest of the health and wellbeing of the college girl to supplement the physical education department. The complex problem of health, physical education, and
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mental hygiene for women is inseparably interrelated with almost every other aspect of the individual's functioning life. In many instances the women in this study finished college in poor health. They often carried to college with them problems which were never discovered and which were the source of much difficulty after graduation and after marriage. The carry-over from their college physical and recreational activities was negligible except in the case of those activities in which they had participated prior to entering college. Very often their college did not give these women the kind of insight into their own function in such a way as to be helpful in meeting their health needs; often it aggravated their problems by certain types of course content not adequately taught. Courses designed to give competence in understanding the personal and social economic problems of life were not adequate.—The financial economic problems with which education is concerned group themselves in two general divisions. The first have to do with the larger economic problems of society and are concerned with production and distribution of goods and the question of value or price as related to the ability of the consumer to purchase commodities and the entrepreneur to produce commodities for a profit. The men and women who specialize in this field of economic problem are called economists, of one variety or another. They are supposed to be the highest authority in this field. They study economic theory, statistics, money and banking, business cycles, public finance, and many other subjects related to the problem of value and distribution. Not all of the women in the study were required to take courses in economics. Where such courses were taken, however, they were of the traditional variety. Economics was defined in various ways, but the essence
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of the definition implied that economics is a study of the production and distribution of wealth—not of how the individual may acquire and spend his income, but how society en masse is structured in its economic life. There were usually discussions of value, price, monopoly, marginal utilities, diminishing returns, money, foreign exchange, and so on. When these women finished their university work, about all of this economic theory that they remembered was that there is some relationship between price and supply and demand. Organized general courses apparently made little contribution towards insight into individual problems of money and finance or, oftentimes, even into the more practical problems of economics from a public point of view. Knowledge of money and banking, for example, is usually hazy. Knowledge of investments, of savings, of insurance is equally vague. The second general division includes those economic problems which have to do with the individual and his ability to earn, to plan his spending, and to be able intelligently to invest whatever his income may be in those goods and services which are based upon as sound economic judgment as he may be able to acquire. Relatively few college courses attempted to give the mass of these women information along this line. A few colleges, in home economics departments, gave courses in economics in the household which were about as vague and general as the required course in economic theory. In a few other colleges there was a realistic attempt to help the individual utilize her knowledge of money and economics to the end that she would be better able to function more adequately in handling the economic affairs of her life. In scrutinizing the data at hand, one is impressed by the fact that the great majority of these women after gradua-
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tion from college have a difficult time living within their incomes regardless of what the income may be. This aspect of the problem may be not easy for the college to attack, since no doubt many habits of handling and spending money have been acquired long before entrance to college. On the other hand, many women have at college their first responsibility for handling financial àffairs for themselves at least to a limited degree. Consequently, the situation might afford an opportunity for one of the most important contributions which college experience could make in directing their thinking and the techniques which they utilize in learning to meet the problems of money and of individual economics. Many of the problems in areas having to do with personal development, as this is limited by money, may have to do with the choice of values on the part of the individual which seem at the time at least somewhat more important than the expenditure of money for such recreational opportunities as may be available. If for a great many individuals a certain economic standard to which they have become accustomed, or to which they aspire, is significant enough to cause them to forego other important experiences in life until they can achieve this standard, then the actual amount of money—however high it may be—is just as important as far as the adjustment of the individual is concerned. At this point, educators might well ponder the extent to which, through setting for students certain goals which are out of line with the possibility of attainment for the average person, they contribute to frustration and difficulty with adjustment in economic affairs after graduation. The problems having to do with techniques and cooperation between husband and wife in money management can
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sometimes be solved very simply as far as the individual is concerned, although much needs to be learned along this line. Aspects to this problem, however, arise out of the differences in cultural background of the two individuals who marry, particularly the patterns of financial arrangements to which they have been exposed in their own families. No one method of handling money can be called the best. Many arrangements are found satisfactory, but it must be borne in mind that to be satisfactory the plan must be one which is accepted by both husband and wife. Other data presented in previous chapters have indicated the extent to which financial problems are interrelated with many other adjustments in life. The insecurities which grow out of anxiety over financial problems have, of course, placed many people in the hands of medical and psychiatric service. The crises which involve loss of economic support are difficult to meet and no doubt can be met with only partial success by the application of wise economic thinking to the organization of our national life. It appears, then, that three suggestions for educators grow out of these data: ( 1 ) Somehow or other, students in colleges and universities should be given a more realistic understanding of those aspects of economic adjustment which are more practical and less theoretical. Here we mean that some better knowledge of budgeting, investments, savings, insurance, and so on may have greater ultimate value for the general student than the theoretical technicalities now so often taught. ( 2 ) The average student should be helped to develop his ability to handle his own income effectively and efficiently in terms of his own needs and ambitions. This guidance can start in the intermediate and secondary schools as a part of social science. ( 3 ) Parents should be given help and guidance in how to induct
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their children into the complexities of our pecuniary society. Parents might be given direction as to how they can help their children learn to handle small amounts of money and to arrive at methods of thinking and judgments about finance which would be more difficult for a grown person to acquire. What has been said concerning the educational implications of the financial problems of this group of women has not been meant to be critical, since no doubt many students acquire an intangible value from their exposure to general economics which cannot easily be measured. The economic ignorance of the average citizen, however, be he a college graduate or not, is far greater than it should be in a supposedly democratic society which places great weight upon the self-sufficiency and intelligence of each individual. To this situation, those concerned with economics in a broader sense might well give more attention. Courses which were supposed to equip women for a vocation were many times impractical and sometimes even a handicap to the women when they began to practice that vocation.—Although a large percentage of women go directly from college into marriage and thus do not enter any form of gainful employment, many—from either choice or necessity—do enter some kind of business or profession. The data presented in the preceding pages, particularly the section dealing with postcollege vocational experience, seem to suggest a number of things which the educational experience of women might do for them in order to reduce to a minimum the kinds of difficulty which are met after entering upon a job. The problem with the closest relation to the function of the college seems to be "lack of fitness for job," as reported by the women. Many of them indicated lack of vocational training after
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graduation from college and, in addition to the actual lack of fitness, the problem of lack of guidance into the kinds of activity leading to both livelihood and major satisfaction. It seems that for many of these young people the possibility of going directly from college into some kind of vocational employment was decreased by their lack of experience in any particular field. It would be unfair, however, to criticize the college at this point, since the bestequipped vocational-guidance experts have only recently begun to probe into the importance of attitude in job-holding. By far the greatest problem which confronted these women was that of getting along with vocational associates and superiors, which again directs thinking to the problem of human relationships and the necessity for helping people at some point in their school careers to make more adequate adjustments to these kinds of situation. It is true that most of the difficulties ultimately go back to the personality factors in the individual which, in a large measure, have been developed through a series of experiences over which the college itself may have had little control. It might be possible, however, to discover more adequate techniques for helping individuals to overcome their personality handicaps and thus to enhance their ability to get along cooperatively in their vocational relationships. Many expressions of attitude by this group of women show that after entrance upon vocations they were dissatisfied with and unhappy about the work itself. Whether a woman's dislike of her position results from lack of experience which would give her a better basis and preparation for a choice or whether much of her dislike is due to job demands and working conditions is difficult to determine from these data. The stronger factor, however, seems to be
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the former. What possible ways are there, in addition to the Antioch Plan, which might help young women to find for themselves more satisfying kinds of gainful employment? Other implications in these data are quite apart from the purely vocational angle. Much of the dissatisfaction with one's job may be tied up with general dissatisfaction with life because one is not able to achieve the hoped-for degree of fulfillment of one's major aims and expectancies. Job dissatisfaction may merely be another indication of a general lack of adjustment with reference to other aims. The situation brings to mind the thought that there may be a much closer correlation between these, the necessity for earning a living and the set of values and goals which individuals acquire in their early development, and the kind of resourcefulness which they are helped to achieve in their recreational, cultural and social interests and activities. Although we discussed this matter to some extent in the chapter on leisure time and recreational problems, we are prompted to suggest here that, besides training men and women to be skillful in their particular fields, departments of physical education, recreation, and the various fields in the fine and applied arts may help to give the individual broader interests and abilities. If he has this broader base it will be easier for him to find ways of release and opportunities for creative expression and outlets which a person narrowly trained in a vocational sense may fail to find. The educational problem of training women for gainful employment is a complex one. Women face a dual responsibility and a set of conflicting interests and values in their growth through adolescence into maturity. The college emphasis for the woman in many cases is that she make
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some contribution to society through a career effort. Yet she has been reared with a sort of expectancy that at some time in her early twenties she will find her Prince Charming, marry, and live happily ever after. With both of these objectives in mind, which in some cases are conflicting and in others are not, vocational guidance is difficult. There is also the task of helping her to be satisfied with whichever road she may take or to help her in making the choice to pursue both marriage and a career at the same time. It is not so much a question of which is better or worse, whether she should choose a career or marriage or both. The problem is, rather, one of knowing how to provide the kinds of educational experience which will in some measure equip her to meet any combination of circumstances. The majority of the women had little skill or experience in handling the usual household demands of postcollege days and practically no opportunity to acquire this in their college careers.—Practically every woman, whether she marries or lives alone, has need of knowledge and skill in housekeeping. The usualness of these responsibilities in the lives of women would seem to indicate a need and an educational opportunity. What education can do at each level is indicated by the individual's needs at that level. The experience of these women shows them to have acquired, on the whole, an unfavorable attitude toward housekeeping skills and activities and, as well, little knowledge of how to organize and carry on easily and effectively the job of household management. Knowledge needed for success and satisfaction in housekeeping would include information about selection and preparation of food, purchase of clothing and household equipment, use of household appliances, organization of the weekly routine of household work, and direction of
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servants and other household help. These matters should be handled in such a way that the woman has opportunity for personal relaxation, social and recreational activities, time with her husband and children, and the pursuit of whatever civic and community interests she may have. The more efficiently she can manage the affairs of her household and more satisfying will her entire life be. The elementary and secondary school experience of these women had little in it which would contribute to their success as mothers, wives, and housekeepers. The main contribution at these levels was made by their families and, in most instances, this was negligible, not because parents did not see its value but because of servants in the home, an efficient and busy mother, or the ( out of home ) social activities of the growing child which were so demanding that there proved to be no easy way to give household experiences at the same time. Since most of the women went to liberal arts colleges, their higher education was largely in the fields of English, history, modern languages, education, and the fine arts. Whether the college conceives its major function to be the training of women to be scholars, to practice professions, or to know the classics, all colleges must surely recognize that placing them in one of these three fields does not eliminate them from society as women who will have home lives whether they marry or not. Since most do marry, it would seem all the more important that some recognition be given these facts, even by the most academic of institutions who enroll women as students. This does not necessarily mean the establishment of a department of home economics in every college and university but it should mean that biology, psychology, sociology, economics, philosophy, the fine and applied arts,
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and many other subject-matter fields should be so reorganized and integrated as to make a contribution to the personal as well as to the potential professional competence of the woman. The girl who marries and is economically able to have adequate household help may need, even more than the girl who does her own housework, to have had household experiences. One can manage intelligently only that in which one has, by experience, come to know the pitfalls, short cuts, and techniques of the job. This is as true of housekeeping as it is of any trade or profession. Whether a woman's major be English or chemistry, her education, to be effective and usable, must be more than a mental exercise. Just why a study of Plato has more status than a study of babies is not very clear. Why it is more important for a woman to have courses in French or German than to have courses in nutrition, household management, and so on is not convincingly explained. One could accept this point of view only if one could accept also the theory that certain subjects are better mental discipline than others and that the study of philology or philosophy has carry-over values into other areas of life, regardless of the number of identical elements included. The higher education of these women failed to prepare them for household responsibilities. It could, by orientation of viewpoint for certain courses, by having an adequate euthenics program, and by basing its curriculum upon a study of women rather than upon sacred tradition, make a greater contribution to woman as a person and, particularly, in her family household experiences.
These women did not have a constructive program of education designed to give them an understanding of and competence in handling their developing sex lives.—The problem of education, from the point of view of its definite
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bearing on the sex life and development of the individual, is made more difficult because of the way in which sex is tied with cultural taboos. For generations marriage has been handicapped by strong sex taboos. As revealed in the precollege data of this investigation, most young people grow up through childhood and adolescence either ignorant of their normal biological and sex functions or with indoctrinated attitudes on the part of parents and others which make sex one of the most fearful aspects of life for them. These kinds of teaching and cultural attitude are aggravated by traumatic situations concerning normal biological development. The numerous myths which parents tell their children concerning ordinary physical processes have tended for generations to build deep-seated inhibitions and fears concerning those normal phases of sex development through which every individual passes. With the enlightenment which has come in recent years and the partial loosening of those long-standing cultural taboos, much has been done to emancipate education so that it now can teach to a certain extent an adequate biology and psychology of human development. Much is still to be done, however, in this direction. It will probably take several generations to eliminate from the minds of young people and adults many of the myths and superstitions which have been tied up with sex. This job belongs to elementary, secondary, and higher education. When students get into college they still have very inadequate opportunity to understand themselves as human, biological beings, and misinformation and ignorance in the whole field of sex development persist. Added to this gross ignorance and misinformation which college students seem to have, and about which the colleges and universities attended by these women seem to have done relatively little,
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are not only complications which arise from the whole mating problem but also conflicts which come about as a result of courtship and engagement relationships between men and women. All of the cumulative effects of past taboos tend to accentuate the difficulties and to make the individual more self-conscious in matters of sex, whereas in the normal course of development—with proper teaching in biology, psychology, and related subjects—sex should take a normal place in relation to the total development of the individual. What is needed is not so much specific sex-education courses as more adequate courses in fields related to biology and emotional growth and development which deal as realistically with sex development as with other phases of development. Further substantiation of the need for this kind of approach to education for human development and living was brought out in the summarization of the kinds of problem which these people meet after marriage. For the great majority, college education has made either no contribution at all or a negative one to adjustment in this field. Granting that theoretical knowledge can never fully prepare an individual to meet the actual experiences of marriage, still much can be done in the field of education with reference to actual facts and certain attitudes and feelings about sex as an aspect of life which now is not included in the education of a great majority of people. Most of these deep-seated attitudes have come through a process of indoctrination on the part of the family. As long as we feel that ignorance, rather than knowledge and intelligence, is the best method of social control, we shall never be able to solve many of the problems which exist in this area. At the preschool and elementary levels, all schooling should include a kind of elementary biology. Parent educa-
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tion to help parents to break down their own feelings of inadequacy and inhibition in the field of sex development should be provided. Certainly by the time young people reach high school they should know pretty thoroughly the facts of human anatomy, physiology, and reproduction and something of the mental-hygiene aspects of human relationships in this area. It seems almost unbelievable that a great majority of university students graduate without having had any competent instruction in human biology. The growing demand by university students for courses in marriage, and particularly for lectures which deal with human anatomy and with the physiology of sex, indicates that at neither the high-school nor the college level—nor even in many professional schools—have they been exposed to anything which had a practical or functional value for them. One must be aware of the fact that at different age levels certain aspects of this whole field may be more adequately taught than others. As young people approach maturity, particularly at the college level and beyond, there is need not only for formal schooling but also for opportunities for individual consultation and guidance in order to deal with the many normal needs or problems which arise. Thousands of problems that confront young people and adults in the field of sex development relate to matters classed as normal and nonpathological. Many of these problems could be reduced or eliminated at the secondary-school or college level. Even so, many problems will have to be dealt with after marriage by some kind of adult-education and educational-consultation services which, at the present time, are not available for any large mass of the population.
The fields of knowledge which cotdd have helped seem to have done little to help the student achieve an orienta-
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tion about religion and a personally adequate philosophy of life.—Those who found their traditional religious ideas uprooted by the study of science in college apparently accepted the scientific point of view but often were not able to reintegrate their thinking in terms of an adequate philosophy of life. The new and different point of view brought a need for them to reorient their traditional thinking in terms of modern science and newer conceptions of the universe, and some of these women were unable to accomplish this reorientation. It is difficult to evaluate the implications of these data except in very general terms. In the first place, practically the entire group of women had acquired some very deep-seated emotional feelings and beliefs about the ideology of religion and religious practices prior to the time they entered college. Most of their religious feeling and belief resulted from the indoctrination of the family in its attempt to transmit its own current beliefs. At the time of entrance to college, the impact of the more objective and critical point of view seemed to bring about for many, for the first time, a questioning of their acceptance of the traditional teachings of the family and the church. The fact is outstanding that the impact of higher education upon the individual's religious thought brought about a revolt against the point of view which the family had deliberately taught or had somehow caused the individual to acquire in her earlier years. This fact was brought out in many ways; for instance, individuals, while freshmen in college, returned home and discussed doctrines which they no longer believed and which they were sure would create argument and differences of opinion within the family. As these individuals went on through college they often gradually shifted their whole point of view concerning religion,
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particularly the theological aspects of religion, although basically they seem to have maintained a definite feeling for the importance of religion in life—frustrated or inarticulate as this feeling may be. One of the things which college seems not to have done, after jarring the students loose from their traditional religious ideology, was to help them to formulate some kind of working philosophy based upon the newer conceptions of the universe which science has discovered. As a consequence, many individuals entered upon adult life rejecting their earlier beliefs and lacking any well-integrated and thought-out religious philosophy for themselves. There are many evidences of conflict because of the tendency of individuals emotionally to hold on to their earlier traditional teachings and yet intellectually to reject these as a result of their maturing experience, a part of which has been four years at an institution of higher learning. Many of these women go along in this more or less uncertain state of mind and even assume an agnostic point of view for a period of years, until children arrive. They are then forced to meet the problem because they must answer the children's questions and must decide upon some policy as to the religious education of their children. Many feel that they do not want their children to be taught the same traditional theological concepts which they were taught as children, and yet they feel that their children should have the kind of influence which early religious training in church and Sunday school affords. In addition to these problems there are, of course, those conflicts which have come about in their more mature years as a result of a general shift in social attitudes with reference to many of the activities and experiences of life. Due to shifts in social and economic conditions, some
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clients who in other ways gave whole allegiance to the Catholic church were in conflict with reference to the matter of family limitation. At the time of marriage, of course, many differences have to be worked out between husbands and wives who may have differences in religious backgrounds, even within the Protestant faith itself. The results of this study seem to substantiate the findings of other studies with reference to the pattern of religious life which individual families follow, namely, that in the long run and over a period of years the wives seem to be the ones who maintain the religious function of the home, not only by their own participation in the institutionalized affairs of their church but also in seeing to it that the children have religious activities. The husbands, although very often quite religious in their earlier life, tend to withdraw much more definitely from religious participation than do the wives or children. To say just what the implications of all this may be for education is difficult. Operating as we do within a culture in which church and state are definitely separated and in which opportunities for the pursuit of one's own religious life are innumerable, the educational problem is confused. Traditional religion is not taught in the public school system as a whole, and only certain institutions of higher learning require of all students courses in comparative religion or in a specific Christian religion. The general practice of the Catholic church is, of course, to have as many as possible of the children of its parishioners attend parochial schools where religious education and secular education may be carried on hand in hand. Where this is done successfully, the result would seem to be less conflict on the part of individuals with reference to their religious attitudes and practices, because their secular and religious in-
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structìon has been more continuous. Although it is probably not the function of institutions of higher learning to indoctrinate with any one form of theology, it would seem to be a responsibility of these institutions, as regards religion and philosophy, to do something other than create greater problems of frustration and confusion in the minds of students. Higher education in both secular and religious fields tends to create problems in that it presents data which make one constantly revise his attitudes and concepts. In the secular fields, higher education at the same time attempts' to provide for the student some sort of philosophy of science or of art; in religion, likewise an important aspect of life, surely higher education should give every individual an opportunity to study and discuss so that he may arrive at some sort of philosophy also in these more subtle and intangible matters. Since much of the confusion in religion and philosophy comes about in the period after graduation from college, this period would seem to be the time for adult education sponsored either by various religious denominations or by general education. Many adults are seeking to work out a more satisfactory philosophy; the college graduates are not as a rule interested in merely accepting a set of doctrines handed over by someone else, but must formulate their own system of beliefs as a result of wide experience and educational opportunity; and it would seem important that adult education give more thoughtful consideration to this field. To be more specific, an understanding of the philosophy of the various important religions which have evolved throughout history should probably be acquired by every student while he is in contact with public education. With the study of religion, no doubt, should go a consideration
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of philosophy, ethics, aesthetics, psychology, mental hygiene, and even those other aspects of the fine arts which seem to border rather closely upon this field of human values. Here again, more crosscutting of individual departments in the university might be helpful for the general student because more than one narrow specific field is involved in developing the set of beliefs which go to make up one's philosophy of life. We must, therefore, sooner or later differentiate between the training of undergraduates with the idea that they are all going on into graduate work and are all going to become specialists in some field—an assumption which the facts do not bear out—and the training of undergraduates with the knowledge that the majority are not to become specialists. The arts and science courses which are supposed to contribute to personality development and to improve human relationships did not perform their function in the lives of these women.—Psychology, which is supposed to be the science of human behavior, had little functional value for these women in their own personality development, in deepening their understanding of and facilitating their relations with other human beings, or in relation to teaching or other vocational pursuits. In many instances, psychology and mental hygiene were not a required part of their training and were not elected. When they were required or elected, there was little evidence that they were useful to the student. These women had many problems involving attitudes towards people, social situations, and natural contacts with people in which their feelings of inadequacy or personal deficiency of one kind or another were brought into play. The educational implication seems clear-cut. There is need
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for some kind of training for parents and others responsible for early education which will help them to reduce the extent to which children grow up afraid of one another and of themselves in situations involving other people. As to whose responsibility it is, one cannot well divide it according to the developmental periods of the girl's life and assign it piecemeal to parents and teachers at each successive educational level. It would seem that it is the total responsibility of everyone concerned with women's education, from the parents, who begin the process, to the college, which is usually the final formal school program which has an opportunity to affect the individual's personality adjustment. Among the women of this group, not only did courses designed to give a better grasp of human behavior in general fail in their purpose, but these courses seem not to have helped the women in their important relations with associates, relatives, parents-in-law, husband, children, coworkers, and friends. The character of their relations with others gives evidence of lack of efficiency in their training somewhere in the course of development. No doubt thousands of young women enter college handicapped by criticism and lack of parental approval and affection and under the constant surveillance and censorship of their families. It is indeed difficult to say just where education should begin in problems of this sort and how the program of the public-school system and of colleges in particular can contribute to the maturing of these young women. This situation is so representative of the whole range of problems of these young women that it should be a challenge to everyone concerned with the growth and development and education of human beings.
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One would naturally assume that courses in psychology should be of practical help in such problems of personal adjustment. Child development and family life with relation to education in general.—It seems relevant here to raise a question as to why so many people of college age are not better adjusted in human relationships. A great deal of work has been done in the field of child development and parent education, but there still is a wide gulf between what is known by experts and what is known by the great mass of people, who need a more adequate understanding of the problems of adult-child relations. Is the task of providing this understanding to be undertaken primarily at the college level or, since most of the young people who marry never attend college, should the training be greatly expanded at the high-school level? Should the school have specialists to work with the parents, in addition to teachers to do the regular academic work? Such a service might of course increase the expense of public education unless certain courses of doubtful value were eliminated; but looking at it from the long-run point of view, would it not make a sufficient contribution to better human adjustment to warrant the cost? There is a great deal of discussion about the need for closer cooperation between the home and the school. However, except in those rare instances where an administrator has the vision and foresight to undertake some experiments along this line, the actual problem still remains unsolved. There is little question that the family environment in which the individual is brought up and in which he acquires most of his patterns and behavior, his system of beliefs, and prejudices and attitudes of various kinds is the earliest and most potent influence in the determination of
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the direction his life will take. The question can be raised as to whether or not twelve years of schooling bring about any fundamental change in basic, established personality factors. The problem does not seem to be merely one of adding more nursery schools to the public-school system and more courses in the field of family relations. Rather, it is a matter of reviewing what constitutes growth and development from the standpoint of learning and of applying the findings. Is there a possibility that there should be a closer relationship between the school and other public educational and remedial agencies offering service and educational opportunities to all families in the community? In such a relationship we should get rid of the demarcation between children and parents, between those who are in school and those who have graduated from prescribed courses of study. Of course, much of the problem still goes back to the matter of human relations, the extent to which cultural factors complicate the formation of well-adjusted and wellintegrated personalities, and the extent to which we are able through education to make a better application of the principles of mental hygiene now known. If men and women cannot learn to get along with each other in marriage, if it is impossible for parents to bring up their children without dominating them in the many ways which have been illustrated by our case material, then the outlook for those concerned with education is very gloomy. However, the truth seems to be otherwise. As may be illustrated by many of these cases, it is possible for parents to do a better job with their children as they mature, and it is possible for young people to establish themselves on a more mature basis with their parents and relatives. What seems to be needed is a recognition by educators of the
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primacy of this problem as far as it affects growth, development, and education, and of the way in which children and young people attending school are affected by the kinds of family situation out of which they come day by day. As has been said many times, the child takes the familtj to school with htm; he is merely a reflection of the conflicts, attitudes, and adjustments in his home as he arrives in the school each morning. If the truth of this observation is granted, then we should give more than lip service to the importance of developing a kind of progressive education which will reach family life and should extend further our experiments with many kinds of procedures related to teaching methods and the organization of educational programs which may ultimately get at the heart of this problem. It is encouraging to note that such research and such programs are already being attempted in many centers. For many years we have acted on the assumption that if we start with education we can strengthen the course of democracy, but the result seems to be somewhat in question. If we take note of all the research that has been contributed from the fields of psychology, sociology, and related areas, it seems evident that any approach to the solution of the problems in this chapter must be the result of an educational program which will start with the individual and his problems and cultural needs. We must direct an educational program so that it will affect both young people and their parents continuously throughout the whole span of life. Such a program, for one thing, means nursery-school opportunities for young children and educational participation and discussion for their parents. In the last analysis, one of the most fundamental purposes of preschool educa-
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tion is to provide more adequate educational opportunities for parents and for students of teaching. Such a program also means a more progressive kind of public-school training, paralleled by a more progressive kind of education for the parents of school children as they progress from kindergarten through high school. It means the development of more adequate techniques for discovering the basic and fundamental needs of human beings at different levels of development. It means the training of better teachers and the selection of teachers who have personal qualities which permit them to do more than merely an academic teaching job. It means a better correlation and integration of work within the various fields of knowledge. It means the expenditure of a large amount of tax money for an educational program which, in the long run, should reduce the amount of money spent for remedial and corrective agencies. It means applying intelligence to living instead of continuing to follow the outmoded superstitions perpetuated by various groups and institutions within our culture. It means a realistic facing of the fact that the political philosophy, religious ideologies, and economic theories within our culture are important influences which may hamper or facilitate education. If we are really concerned with adapting women's education to women's needs, interests, and abilities, we need to think through pretty clearly and realistically and to attack vigorously some of these major problems. We are not so sure that the definition of education as growth is entirely satisfactory, unless the implication is that the ultimate objective of education is to help individuals to grow and develop to optimum physical and mental stature; to help them reach maturity with the ability to make decisions without fear and trepidation; to help them free themselves
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from the fetters and shackles of ignorance and superstition. The school cannot accomplish these objectives unless it takes a much more accurate inventory of the potent influences of the family on the growth, development, and personality of children. Many schools, of course, are attempting to proceed on such a basis, some more realistically than others, both in purpose and in achievement. The greatest difficulties, perhaps, in the actual achievement of this ideal are in educating parents to a willingness to accept a more progressive curriculum, in the development of more adequate educational techniques, and in improving the organization of public education. In the area of husband-wife relations, which overlaps or touches so many other kinds of problem, it is almost necessary to infer that all branches of higher education have some contribution to make, though doubtless some specific fields of knowledge are more important than others in this respect. It is in the last analysis a problem for psychology and philosophy. In this area education needs to concern itself not only with the college student but also with all age levels from the time of school entrance far into adult life. The problem challenges the methods which parents use with children and the ways in which parents may be helped to do a more effective job of child rearing. The first problem for education in this area is to determine whether or not adequate data are available upon which to base a teaching program in the field of marriage and family relations. What is known about the factors which contribute to success or failure in this most intimate and difficult of all human relations? For example, would the teaching of sound mental hygiene to all who pass through the public-school system achieve the greatest results in this field? Or is it necessary that greater importance
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be attached to the knowledge and skills related to homemaking? How many of the problems arising out of conflicts between husband and wife are due to cultural factors, and how many are due to the kind of early conditioning and personality development of the two individuals who undertake marriage? How much of the problem is due to factors of social change, how much to individual physiological factors, and how much to outworn theories about marriage and the family which come into conflict with newer concepts and points of view? To what extent are the problems created by education itself through the creation of goals and objectives for women which are incompatible with the culturally assigned role which they must assume? These and many other questions have to be considered and answered, at least to some degree, by research before education can deal with certain aspects of the problem. Assuming that many of the husband-wife problems shown in our study arise from a conflict between differences in the cultural backgrounds of the marriage partners, to what extent can education remedy this condition? Would giving all students the usual kind of course in cultural anthropolgy solve the problem? Would courses as now given in any single department of most institutions make it possible for young men and women to marry and cooperate more successfully in working out these differences in cultural backgrounds? To what extent does the knowledge of certain facts of life carry enough weight, in terms of insight and ability to change and make adjustments, so that the end result is totally different from what it might have been without such knowledge? Assuming that many problems of husband-wife relations arise from personality factors which have their origin in the early conditioning of the individual in the family, at
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what point can education attack this set of problems? If, as some psychologists assert, most of the emotional conditioning of individuals occurs in the early years of life, how much would any sort of educational program at the college level contribute to an actual change of habits and attitudes? What kind of education for parents must be developed in order to enable them to do a more effective job with their children? No doubt many of the problems are definitely related to the values which individuals come to hold significant. These value judgments which they must inevitably make in all kinds of situation are in part a result of their early conditioning and in part something the family transmits from generation to generation. How far is it the function of education to grapple with these philosophical questions of a practical nature which vitally affect human relations? These divergent value judgments held by husband and wife may be the underlying cause of much marital conflict and family disorganization. Here we are dealing not only with the problem of human relations as it concerns husbands and wives but with something that pervades the entire realm of human association. While the husband-and-wife problem is perhaps the most intimate one and involves more difficult and complex relations than other human associations, there are also to be considered the way in which people get along with vocational associates, superiors, and associates in recreation, and how they are able to manage themselves in relation to children, relatives, and others. Do some personalities have drives which make it essential to them to dominate others? Are there persons who can never accept the fact that they are wrong? Are there some who have built up resentments and hostilities towards authority which make
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it difficult if not impossible for them to function adequately in any human situation? What kind of philosophy have others developed with reference to the ethical and moral aspects of human relations? To what extent is it possible for the school program to make a positive contribution to these phases of development? For example, are the basic factors which have been held important in marriage artificial? Do we need to reconsider some of them? Marriage involves a joining together of the lives of a man and a woman for much more than physical sexual enjoyment. The economic and social aspects of marriage are tremendously important. The fact of what marriage may mean to the personal security and development of the marriage partners throughout their lives together may also be much more significant than the sex factor, as such, though the sex factor may play a significant role in creating the kind of companionship and unity of interests for which every couple hope. How to get parents to leave their children alone when they leave the family and how to get children to live their own lives independently of their parents are problems with difficult implications for education. The independence problem has its roots, not so much in college education, as in the pattern of conditioning which begins at birth and persists throughout the life of the individual. The solution lies in a program of training and retraining for independence from birth to death. Perhaps a combination of parent education and child education directed towards this end may accomplish more than has been achieved so far. There is little question but that schools are aware of the many conflicts existing in the minds of young adolescents with reference to their families. What the school can do about such problems is not yet clear, however.
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These college women had innumerable premarital problems relating to such situations as parental interference in choice of mate, deciding what church to attend, deciding whether to live with parents or not, determining housekeeping practices, and deciding whether to plan to have children. College education can give young people some understanding of themselves, of their fears and feelings of inferiority and inadequacy, of their own nature, and of the reasons for their inability to function on an adult level with their parents. In this area it is likely that institutions of higher learning could explore more fully the possibilities of directly educating parents to an understanding of the nature of the problems that they are having with their children. Such a program has been conducted successfully in several colleges. The types of problem revealed by the women of this study raise the question of the extent to which the college or any one level of education can prepare women to solve the many kinds of problem which confront them as adults. There would seem to be a need to consider the educational program in a more functional and longitudinal sense. Learning, or education, begins at birth and continues throughout the life of the individual. It involves all types of experience and all kinds of interrelated problem. One cannot consider a particular age level in relation to education without considering the preceding and parallel situations which influence the individual's growth. One wonders whether these women might not have profited from a continuous educational effort, integrating the more formal type of education with the efforts of other educational agencies, such as public health agencies, recreational facilities and organization, and parent and adult education groups. One can educate for competence in a specific skill
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without very much concern for related matters, but when one is concerned with a type of education designed to be of functional value in helping the individual to meet his life problems, one cannot profitably utilize such a pattern or philosophy of education as a basis for procedure. We have asked many questions and given few answers. Very likely, many of the questions raised in this chapter cannot be answered at present. In view of the facts that the majority of women in our culture ultimately marry and become mothers and that most children live during their early lives at home with their parents, this husband-wife-family relation would appear to be very important. There is here a challenge for those concerned with realistic education, and here are innumerable opportunities for imaginative and creative research in the problems of marriage and the family as they operate within our culture. Some may say that the types of problem and situation discussed in this chapter are irrelevant to the college education of women. Perhaps the college cannot deal with all the problems here discussed. It is a part of the college's problem to consider its proper contribution in this matter of the parent-child-family relation as it concerns education. The importance of this relation to college education is amply illustrated by our case material and by the studies undertaken in other centers. Those other studies show that many of the problems of entering college freshmen are intimately interwoven with the family situation, and that there is little likelihood that college curricula as now organized can assist them to make a better adjustment to the stress and strain of their family life, which handicaps many in their academic work and in their social and personal adjustments. If in higher education for women we can tie together a
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satisfactory degree of intellectual discipline and sharpness of scholarship both with the graduates' world of real experience and with the essential problems of contemporary civilization, we will indeed have taken a great step forward.
Appendix STUDIES
A
R E L A T E D
TO
THIS
I N V E S T I G A T I O N
of college graduates was begun in 1932, and the women who contributed to the study graduated from college in the preceding decade. The problems confronting them after their graduation from college and during their contact with the Advisory Service form the basis upon which the range and types of problem and educational implication were derived. Throughout this period the authors have been cognizant of many of the other research studies and educational experiments which have been in process in institutions of higher learning and elsewhere. We wish to acknowledge the help that we have gained from these other studies and experiments, which have particular reference to the findings and generalizations of this study. We wish to call attention to certain general classes of material. First, there are the educational experiments out of which have come results demonstrating the validity of many of the suggestions and findings of this study. Some of the more important centers of such experimental study are Stephens College, whose curriculum was recast more or less in terms of the extensive studies of Dr. W. W. Charters of Ohio State University; Sarah Lawrence College, HIS INVESTIGATION
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STUDIES
whose experimental program is so ably discussed in the recent book by President Constance Warren entitled A New Design for Women's Education; the Institute of Euthenics at Vassar College; Bennington College; and the General College at the University of Minnesota, originally under the direction of Malcolm S. MacLean, now President of Hampton Institute. All of these centers have attempted to study and to reorganize their curricula for college students, and for women in particular, in such a way that the needs of their students may be met from a cultural, academic, and utilitarian point of view. In special fields, institutions such as Mills College in Physical Education and the University of Michigan Student Health Service have carried on progressive and effective experiments in the improvement of educational programs for women. In addition to these experimental centers, of which only a few of the important ones have been mentioned, there has been a widespread interest in the whole problem of curriculum development. Fostering such programs have been the studies made by the various commissions established by the Progressive Education Association, studies by the American Youth Commission, and reports from the American Council on Education and the New York State Regents' Inquiry. All of these were preceded by a very extensive survey of land-grant colleges throughout the country by the National Society for the Study of Education; in this survey, an evaluation of liberal arts college curricula was carried out under the direction of Dr. Kathryn McHale. It is felt that this present investigation is in line with these current studies and experiments as well as with other scientific efforts and publications such as those of the Child
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Study Association of America, of the National Congress of Parents and Teachers, of the various child development centers at the University of California, the University of Iowa, Teachers College at Columbia University, and the Merrill-Palmer School, of Malcolm S. MacLean in his Inglis Lectures, and of John R. Tunis in Was College Worth While? Studies of Esther Lloyd-Jones, published by the American Council on Education; Social Competence in College Students, a study of Smith College graduates published some fifteen years ago by Eleanor Louisa Lord; surveys of the alumni of various colleges and institutions of which Iowa State College and the University of Missouri as well as others indicating careful evaluations; the research by Dr. Kenneth Heaton published in a volume entitled The Failing Student: a Study of Academic Failure and the Implication for Education; a study of Women in a Changing World made by the American Association of University Women under the direction of Mrs. Harriet Houdlette; the report of New College at Columbia University; studies by Mary Fisher and Margaret Benz on the work of the Family Consultation Bureau at Teachers College; and the various yearbooks and other volumes, having to do with the special field of education for family life, published by Joseph Folsom, Ivol Spafford, Beulah Coon, and the American Association of School Administrators all give evidence of expanding interest in the development of curricula to meet more nearly the life situations of women during and after their graduation from college.
Appendix C O L L E G E
W O M E N
COMMUNITY
S
Β AND
S E R V I C E
1933 an experiment has been going on as a part of the Advisory Service of the Merrill-Palmer School in Detroit. It had been an experiment in channeling college women into community service, an experiment in setting up a clearinghouse in which metropolitan Detroit's resources in trained woman power can be directed to volunteer service in any of its hundreds of social and educational organizations, an experiment in helping college women to find outlets for their particular interests and abilities and satisfaction in participation in community life. They come, a constant stream of college women year by year: the young married woman just arrived in Detroit searching worth-while ways to fill her leisure time; the new graduate who finds her first year at home a great letdown after the stimulus of four demanding college years; the woman whose little children keep her at home so constantly that she welcomes one half-day each week to do something which takes her out of her home to help in her community; the older woman seeking new interests now that her children are grown and away from home. These women have good educational background; many have INCE
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had special training, and many professional experience. Where shall they go to find the need in their community that fits their training and interest? The experiment began during the depression days of 1933 as an answer to an emergency call from the social agencies of Detroit, to help fill the gaps in their drastically cut staffs. Volunteers with background and experience were needed—especially women with training in home economics. A local committee was formed to get in touch with college alumnae organizations and with as many individual home economists as could be reached. This committee was made up of the director of the Merrill-Palmer School, representatives of the Council of Social Agencies, the Visiting Housekeepers Association, the Department of Public Welfare, and several lay people who were leading home economists. They turned to the Advisory Service for College Women at the Merrill-Palmer School, which had been closely in touch with the college women of Detroit all that winter. This request indicated the need for a clearinghouse through which college women could be channeled into volunteer service. This need had been recognized by the Advisory Service in its first year of meeting college women. One of the questions often asked the consultant concerned opportunities in the community for the use of their college training and a chance to do something they considered worthwhile. The Advisory Service, in responding to these definite community needs as presented by this committee, added to its staff a woman well acquainted through professional work with community organizations in Detroit and in touch with the personnel needs of many agencies. It was to be
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her responsibility to channel college women into volunteer service. At that time there was no central placement bureau for volunteers with which the committee could cooperate, and the social agencies welcomed a new source of volunteers. In that first spring, the local committee made but a beginning in contacting the great numbers of college women in Detroit, for only a few organized alumnae groups could be reached that season. However, the work was started and questionnaires were sent to many of the social agencies in Detroit, asking them to list in detail the kind of volunteer jobs to be done. The emergency needs expressed by these agencies were presented in letters and in talks, and the college women who had planned to be in the city during the summer responded with enthusiasm. The committee noted that although many letters were sent out, by far the greatest number of volunteers responded to the personal appeal, as the enthusiasm of one volunteer kindled another. Home economists, teachers, librarians, business secretaries, and graduates with varied backgrounds and no specialized training answered the call—thirty-five of them—and gave valiant service in the emergency of that first summer. They registered patients and took doctor's notes in hospital clinics. Thev taught classes in sewing, homemaking, and typewriting and led clubs in settlement houses and Y.W.C.A.'s. They read case records for family service agencies. They directed play schools, assisted in nursery schools, and took children for summer outings. They assisted the visiting housekeepers in their home teaching. The agencies which had used them reported good service, efficiently carried through, and the volunteers were enthusiastic about their jobs with the agencies.
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COMMITTEE
In the fall of 1933, the committee formed to meet these emergencies considered the report of the summer work given by these thirty-five volunteers. Although those who were teachers returned to their schools and those who were students returned to college, many others wanted to continue their service and it was found that the social agencies needed more and more volunteers. With these facts in mind, the committee was enlarged by adding representatives of more alumnae groups and of more social agencies and the project was carried on with the advice of a steering committee from the Advisory Service of the MerrillPalmer School. During this first winter, the number of college women who came in to volunteer service grew to seventy-five, and more alumnae groups came to know about the project and to voice their interest in it. After a year of this informal leadership, the agencies which had used these college women volunteers were asked to come together and express their opinion of the value of their volunteer service. They agreed that an organization of college women would be useful; they would back any such project, for they needed volunteers and appreciated the help of experienced and trained women. At the same time, representatives of twenty-two alumnae groups came together to hear the report that had been given to the agency executives. This report covered the one and one-half years' work of the bureau. The alumnae were enthusiastic, for they could see the value of the work and its possibilities. However, they were cautious about taking the whole responsibility. Their discussions crystal-
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lized into these conclusions: First, they wanted an organization formed by a federation of alumnae groups and not sponsored by any one group. Second, they hoped the assistance of the Merrill-Palmer School could be continued as long as possible. Third, they felt that a paid, trained secretary was necessary to place and supervise volunteers. O R G A N I Z A T I O N OF T H E C O L L E G E V O L U N T E E R SERVICE
WOMEN'S
The discussions by the social agencies and the alumnae groups had these results: A plan of organization was presented to as many college alumnae and sorority groups as could be reached, and the Advisory Service of the MerrillPalmer School agreed it would continue channeling college women into volunteer service if the college women of Detroit expressed a strong enough desire for it. What began in such a small way has proved its usefulness to college women and to social agencies of Detroit. It has become an organization which keeps several hundred college women in volunteer work in the community. The College Women's Volunteer Service has been the outgrowth of this experiment. It is a federation of local college clubs, alumnae groups of universities, sororities, and of A.A.U.W. chapters of Detroit and its suburbs. At the present time sixty-one alumnae groups are in this federation, each represented by one authorized delegate. College women unaffiliated with any local group are represented by delegates chosen at large. Each member group pays a nominal membership fee to cover postage, stationery, and incidental expenses. This nominal fee may be raised as the financial responsibilities of the organization become greater.
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Group membership continues from year to year. At times one alumnae group is more active than another, perhaps because of its own inherent strength or because the delegate chosen is more intensely interested in volunteer work. As new alumnae groups are formed in the city they ask or are asked to become members. The duties of the delegates are to recruit new volunteers from their respective groups by keeping before them the developing opportunities for volunteer service. They watch particularly for new graduates and newly arrived young women in the city. They must also keep their colleges, as well as their national alumnae organizations, informed about the Volunteer Service. Many of the delegates are in toiich with the consultation and appointment offices of their colleges and through these offices students are put in touch with volunteer opportunities during their summer vacations. Countless women, from colleges all over the country, are not organized in Detroit, but all delegates and all volunteers make it their responsibility to spread the news to them of this clearinghouse for volunteer service open to all college women. ORGANIZATIONAL
DEVELOPMENT
Gradually the organization has become a little better defined. A simple constitution was adopted early in the fourth year of the experiment. This step in organization came about entirely as a result of group thinking. An executive committee and the usual officers head the organization. The members of this committee are elected by the whole membership, delegate and individual. It is at present stipulated that three out of five officers must be delegates. The chairmen of standing committees of activities, place-
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ment, membership, and education are chosen from the board but need not be delegates. The board holds monthly meetings and carries increasing responsibilities. M E M B E R S H I P FOR I N D I V I D U A L V O L U N T E E R S AS W E L L AS FOR A L U M N A E G R O U P S
Individual membership is another step that has evolved. For the first three years only alumnae groups were members and their delegates carried on the business, made policies and planned the work of the College Women's Volunteer Service. Volunteers were not themselves a part of the organization except through the delegates of their alumnae groups. The need for individual membership came up for discussion from time to time. The volunteer who was at work at some special job in an agency where there was no other volunteer from the C.W.V.S. had no sense of belonging to the organization. She was invited to an annual meeting but that was not enough to give her a continuing sense of responsibility in the larger group. It was decided that one way to raise the quality of volunteer work was to set up membership for the individual volunteer. The delegates accepted this proposal, realizing that this participation of volunteers as members would help to build up a more cohesive organization which would gain in strength as new volunteers joined older members. This change has resulted in making the applicant for volunteer service a provisional member. When she has given thirtyfive hours of satisfactory work she becomes an active member and pays a small yearly carrying charge. Each alumnae group delegate, upon taking office, also becomes an active member unless she is already a member of the organization through her previous volunteer service. Her delegate activities are counted as her volunteer
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service for the year she serves as delegate. Thus there are two sources of individual membership, the college woman who comes in through her volunteer work and the delegate who enters to represent her alumnae group. Increasing numbers of delegates take on other volunteer jobs as they become familiar with interesting opportunities; more outstanding volunteers each year are appointed as delegates from their alumnae groups to the C.W.V.S. It may clarify the subject of individual membership in the organization to quote from the constitution: Active members shall b e — ( 1 ) Authorized delegates from the alumnae organizations which hold group memberships. ( 2 ) College women who have completed thirty-five hours of satisfactory volunteer service approved by the Membership Committee, and who pay such dues as may be set in the by-laws. All active members are entitled to vote. Associate members shall be college women who have completed their provisional service satisfactorily but who do not pay dues nor vote, whether in or out of volunteer service. Provisional members shall be those college women who have not yet completed thirty-five hours of supervised volunteer service.
The experience of having individual members even for one year has proved that the volunteers have pride in membership and that alumnae groups understand the purpose of the C.W.V.S. far better than formerly. A much more closely knit organization has resulted. These gradually developing organizational methods will make for increasing expansion as there is increasing need. The C.W.V.S. is constantly taking on more and more the form and activities of other organizations of volunteers. There is this difference, however. The C.W.V.S. lays emphasis upon finding opportunity for creative experience
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for its volunteers and membership is held on an educational basis, not invitational. RECORDS
Careful records have been kept during this seven-year experiment. The blank on which each woman makes her application for volunteer service as a provisional member of the C.W.V.S. asks many questions. The applicant states her education, training, previous volunteer history, work experience, particular interests, abilities, preferences for volunteer service, and how much time she can give. This information gives a helpful and necessary background for placement. All requests for volunteers from the community are kept on file and filled as soon as possible. Often, however, a volunteer with special training is offered to an agency in the field of her particular ability. A young woman who has had experience in mental testing may be suggested to several agencies, though no dated request is on file when this volunteer appears. For instance, the college senior who is majoring in speech defects may be suggested to a speech clinic in one of the hospitals for full-time summer work. The volunteer is welcomed most gladly if there is an opening for her, and if there is none, a suggestion is often made of another agency which might need her. The agencies are asked to keep careful record of the volunteers who give service—how many hours are given, types of service rendered, and the ability, initiative, attitude, and the dependability of the volunteer. The agencies have recognized the value of this record-keeping of volunteer work and cooperate well. To this record of the agency's estimate of the volunteer has been added the volunteer's estimate of her relationship to the agency and the value
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285
of the piece of work done. This forms a body of information which may be useful to the central volunteer bureau as well as to agencies using volunteers. Whether the volunteer continues in both winter and summer or whether she returns after summer vacation is recorded from year to year. The turnover in active volunteer service is great, perhaps because so many members are young married women who settle down to the raising of their families or who move out of town when their husbands are transferred to other cities. A surprising number of members return to active service as soon as possible. They miss the outside contacts and the stimulus of accomplishment. It is recognized, however, that even one winter's or one summer's volunteer work has a value for any woman. She is a better-informed person about her community; she has developed a special interest that may easily hold over when she moves to a new city. If she stops her work to have a family, she will have the knowledge gained through her social clinic lecture course, and an interest in a special agency to keep her alert to the news she reads and hears about social services. Frequently the C.W.V.S. member who moves to another city asks, "Is there such an organization of college women where I am going? I'd like to join and get right to work again as soon as I am settled." Where there is a central volunteer bureau she is given the name and address at once but, since there are only a few in the country, the suggestion is usually made that she go to the Community Fund Office, to the Girl Scouts, Camp Fire, Y.W.C.A., a children's home, a community nurse, or the office of the Social Aid Bureau. No matter what changes come to her, one thing is sure —she is never again the same individual as before her
286
COMMUNITY SERVICE
volunteer service. She is more understanding and more alert to social problems and to how they are being met. WHY COLLEGE W O M E N W A N T SERVICE
VOLUNTEER
Why she wants to be a volunteer worker is asked on the application blank filled out by each provisional member. The reasons have been honestly stated and have been most varied—from the young person who with a smile put down, "for fun," to the very earnest woman who felt she owed the community a debt for the privilege of her university education. More than half the six hundred have wished to do something for their community and make a worth-while use of their leisure time. The many young married women who come to Detroit to live in small apartments find that their first years are very lonesome and that they have too much leisure. A club in a settlement house one afternoon, a day of clinic service in a hospital, or a morning in the homemadetoy workshop brings usefulness, outside interest, and new friends. The same young woman may, during her second year, add work on the Community Fund Drive or become a member of a Girl Scout or Camp Fire committee in her district and find herself gradually taking her place in her new city. Many college women have wanted to keep up their professional experience and to be in touch with others at work in their own fields. The volunteer who had taught college art courses found developing interests in carrying on an experiment in art with adolescents in an educational institution. The trained dietician volunteer who assisted the staff dietician of a hospital out-patient department one day
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
287
each week found professional friends while giving excellent service. Many college women have needed stimulation and an outlet for their interests. The teacher who had wanted to study medicine found a great stimulus in assisting in an eye clinic two afternoons each week after school. This service has added much understanding for her work with her sight-saving classes in school. Other college women have wanted volunteer service to gain training for jobs and experience for their future work. This reason was given largely by the young college graduate who returns to her home city lacking job experience and the college girl at home for her summer vacation. Fortunate is the new college graduate whose family can let her take a year to find herself and her real interests if she graduated without training for a chosen field of work. With a major in sociology and a minor in child psychology, volunteer experience in both fields may help her to decide what graduate study she may wish to undertake. Just as wisely does the college student spend some of her summer holiday learning to know her community and gaining work experience. Assisting in a settlement-house nursery school or in the out-patient department of a large hospital or reading records for a family welfare association gives the college student a knowledge of some of the social services of a large city. Volunteer work as a vocational tryout or in giving concrete content for her abstract studies is of real value to the college girl. PLACEMENT
OF
VOLUNTEERS
The C.W.V.S. has found that the success of volunteer work depends much upon the care taken in the placement
288
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
of the volunteer. A personal interview with the applicant is necessary in which the education, interests, training, and present situation are disclosed and, on the other hand, the various opportunities and needs in the community are presented. Whatever service promises outlet for her enthusiasm and interest and brings a challenge to her intellect and training is where the volunteer will give her best work. The agency is best served by the volunteer who is not pushed into a job regardless of her real interests. Where the community need meets the volunteer's greatest ability and interest, the best placement is made. Hit-and-miss methods of taking the best volunteers that can be picked up at the moment by the agency has resulted in so many volunteer failures that it has been most disheartening to the volunteer and to the agency. When there is a probability that the right person with the right training for the job may be available, agency executives and staffs plan more challenging pieces of work for volunteers. The right person in the right job also brings a far greater ratio of success, and success is absolutely necessary to keep a volunteer satisfied with her accomplishment. The young woman who returns to the secretary or the placement chairman thrilled with her' volunteer work and wanting more volunteers to come and help, shows she has been given a growing project which challenges her ability and gives her great satisfaction. Community agencies are turning more and more often to an organization which has an index of volunteers with special training and experience. When the Council on Community Nursing wanted a volunteer to help with a special study of "nursing aide work," it was a relief to turn to an organization that had on file the abilities of its members as well as a record of how well they had carried their
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
289
past volunteer jobs; and when a children's museum needed a mineralogist to classify rocks for exhibit purposes, it knew where there was a chance to find a volunteer with that training. The research worker put in hundreds of hours during three months on the nursing study, and the volunteer with the geology major worked a day each week all one winter in the museum. Both of them were happy to find the jobs that needed to be done and did them with satisfaction both to the agencies and to themselves. Councils of social agencies in many cities are making central volunteer placement bureaus an integral part of their programs. This principle of "the right volunteer in the right place" is an accepted practice in their placement work. It is one of the underlying reasons for centralized placing, which makes possible a far wider choice of volunteer work and a greater likelihood of finding the best volunteer for the particular job. SPECIAL
PROJECTS
DEVELOPED
In its fourth year, the C.W.V.S. developed a project of its own. Up to this time volunteers had been placed wherever service was needed in social and educational organizations in the community. At this time it opened a workshop where homemade toys are turned out for hospital and clinic use and to help parents learn how to make toys for their children. The Children's Hospital of Michigan asked them to make toys for their convalescing children which would help to keep them happy and contented and to make the work of the nurses easier. The Nursing Division of the Detroit Department of Health asked for kits of toys to be carried by the nurses in their home visits. The State Organization of Public Health Nursing asked for an exhibit of many homemade toys to send over the state to clinics
290
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
in different communities so that parents might get ideas and inspiration for making their own toys for their own children. All these requests made the C.W.V.S. realize the need for homemade toys, and the workshop of the Merrill-Palmer School was loaned to them for two days each week. A new interest developed among their members, and young women who had never made things with their hands were interested to see what they could create. They found great satisfaction in making toys out of tin cans and sugar boxes and inner tubes and in making doll houses from orange crates and paper cartons. Very little money is spent for materials. The great variety of things which most people throw away are collected from the alumnae group and stored away for use week by week. The intangible results of this workshop experience have been just as great as the tangible. Saws and paints and needles are found to be a great outlet for initiative and energy. It has meant much to the newcomer in the city to meet other college women and work with them week by week. Many new friendships have been formed and interests exchanged. Two young married women who were neighbors as high-school girls in an Eastern city met each other for the first time in Detroit at the bookbinding table in the C.W.V.S. workshop. They renewed their friendship with great happiness. As one volunteer estimated the value of the workshop to herself, she said that it gave her so much satisfaction that her family called it her "occupational therapy." Alumnae groups are using the workshop more and more for annual production meetings. The delegate takes full responsibility for planning the work meeting. The women may help fill the kits of homemade toys of the public health
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
291
nurses or they may all concentrate on making a doll house for the toy cart at Children's Hospital. They may have tea in an afternoon meeting or hastily eat sandwiches at noon so they can get more done in a day. Usually one of them finds that she wants to join the workshop regulars, and always the group announces that "it was great fun to accomplish so much and we want to come again." The making of homemade toys has led to many new developments in volunteer services. Recreation with convalescing children in several hospitals is carried on by volunteer workers with their toy carts laden with homemade toys and with books that have been reconditioned in the C.W.V.S. workshop. Picture puzzles and sewing cards, cigar-box looms, and scrapbooks in which to paste pictures make the long hours pass much more quickly, and the toy-cart teacher makes a bright spot in the hospital day. Exhibits of homemade toys are also in demand for mothers' clubs in settlement houses and WPA nursery schools and in well-baby clinics. Volunteers often go with the exhibits to explain how the toys are made, and usually the inspiration carries over into the group and they start in at their next meeting to make inner-tube rabbits and squirrels and sock dolls with yarn hair and embroidered faces. Each year several lectures by Merrill-Palmer School experts in child psychology and nursery-school work are provided for C.W.V.S. members. The volunteers who are making the toys, using them in hospitals, or showing exhibits to parents find the lectures helpful in their work. The workshop has inestimable value as a place for trying out volunteers. Many provisional members do not know at once what service they wish to undertake. They can be
292
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
useful making toys for some months, and while the women work together the talk drifts to Braille transcribing, Braille bookbinding, how interesting it is to teach English to a refugee, or what satisfaction it is to help with a settlement mothers' club. Before her thirty-five hours are finished, the volunteer usually has decided where she wants to work and what she wants to do next. If she decides to stay with toy-making all the year she often takes on one of the services connected with the workshop, such as taking exhibits to Girl Scout troops or to community centers where she helps others to make toys also. Another useful aspect of any project which is an integral part of the organization's own program is that the placement committee can find out the ability and stability of the new volunteer while she is at work there. The woman who overestimates her free time may find home responsibilities too great and may have to drop out. The volunteer whose enthusiasm is of short duration gradually fades out of the project. This tryout has prevented understandable irritation on the part of the agencies and embarrassment on the part of the organization taking responsibility for placing the volunteer. A college women's volunteer service has a contribution to make in any community. It has its greatest value as a resource group from which can be drawn women with certain training and experience and background which is useful to the community. These college-trained women exist in every city and county in the country. It is true that they have always taken their part in leadership. It is an undisputed fact that over the years their intelligent leadership has gone into the building of many of the finest social and educational institutions in the country. They have given valiant service. Every community knows, however, the
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
293
difficulty of getting the right woman for the right volunteer job or the right board member or the right committee member. It means endless searching with unsystematic methods and often an unsure knowledge of qualifications. Fortunate is the city that has a central volunteer placement bureau to which it can refer its request for this right woman. But even more fortunate is the city where the central placement bureau can ask its volunteer organizations to find among their members this volunteer whose qualifications are recorded and whose previous volunteer history is on file. The certainty of securing the right woman is far greater and the effort expended is far less. A federation of college alumnae groups in any community has potential strength. When this federation maintains a volunteer organization whose members have the one aim—service to their community—it may be immeasurably useful to the central volunteer placement bureau. But, though it is growing, the number of central volunteer placement bureaus all over the country is still small. The need for well-chosen citizen service is universal. The resource which exists in a college women's volunteer organization would be obviously useful in many communities. The Detroit experiment deems itself justified in its community service in metropolitan Detroit. Suggestions for carrying out such a plan in other communities are presented. Initiative may be taken by an individual college woman, an alumnae group, an American Association of University Women chapter, a council of social agencies, or a central volunteer placement bureau. Finding college alumnae groups in any part of the country is not difficult. Alumnae of local colleges and state universities live in almost every hamlet. They are organized universally into
294
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
college groups and sorority groups. Where the American Association of University Women exists, it can be counted upon to be vitally interested in any such program of volunteer service organization. Since its membership is made up of graduates from various colleges and universities, the members can help to contact their local alumnae groups. It has been found wise that any organization of college women for volunteer service should be a cooperative effort of alumnae groups. There is far greater strength in membership open to all alumnae groups, including junior colleges, as well as membership open to all women who have studied in schools of higher education. When a few alumnae groups have been brought together and the plan is considered worth-while, a systematic search for all alumnae groups in the city would be made and membership would be offered to all. This federation of alumnae groups with delegates appointed from each one to keep in touch with its own members who are interested in community service may be all that is desired in some communities. Placement of volunteers may be taken care of wholly by a central volunteer bureau or a central volunteer committee, as is done in several small cities. A volunteer organization of college women made up of individual members which is sponsored by a federation of alumnae groups has added value, according to the experience of the Detroit College Women's Volunteer Service. It has been pointed out before that the members who belong to a group of women with similar interests have a chance for the unity and fellowship which everyone needs. To find one's niche in the city where one's volunteer work is asked for brings satisfaction. To hear constantly from fellow members of other pieces of volunteer work, other fields of social service, brings an added stimulus and education. Meeting
COMMUNITY
SERVICE
295
together, learning together, spreading the news about opportunity for service, then going out each to her own special piece of volunteer work—this has become the program of the college women volunteers in Detroit.
INDEX
Adult education, see Education Advisory service, see Guidance Advisory Service for College Women, establishment of, 4, 273; service basis of the study by, 4 f.; sources of clientele, 5, 8, 11 ( see also Clientele); organization of the study: diagrams and record forms, 5; criteria of selection of subjects, Θ; composition of the group, 7-11; study centered in Detroit, 7; validity of the study, 11-13; reliability of the liistories, 13-15; analysis of the histories, 15-25 (see Case histories); the most important finding of the study, 186; studies related to the investigation, 273-75; experiment in channeling clients into community service, 276-95 (see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service) Alumnae, college: evaluation of the way in which they affect progressive change in education, 236; surveys of, 275; cooperation with College Women's Volunteer Service ( q.v. ), 278 ff. passim American Association of School Administrators, 275 American Association of University Women, 275, 280, 293 American Council on Education, 274, 275 American Youth Commission, 274 Antioch Plan, 249 Associates, relationships with, 19,
64-68; outstanding problems, 65; see also Relationships Attitudes, see under subject, e.g., Husband; Possessions Behavior, failure of courses designed to give better grasp of, 261 Bennington College, 274 Benz, Margaret, 275 Bemreuter Personality Inventory, 9 Biology, courses in fields related to, 254, 255 California, University of, 275 Career, see Vocation Case histories, the source of data: diagram for. 5; reliability, 13-15; analysis of, 15-25; determining and evaluating a "problem," 16; twenty-one classifications, 17-23; their six major divisions, 23; excerpts from histories, texts: re sex relations, 59-64; family and relatives, 70-76; husband-wife relations, 80-84; women's needs and the college curriculum, 93-106; the individual's pattern, 121-45, 149-65 Catholic church, 258 Charters, W. W., 273 Children, nursery school for, 5; relationships with, 18, 90 f.; techniques for meeting life situations, 34; lack of knowledge about care and development of, 91; the "whole child," 168; dependence upon intuition and common sense
298
INDEX
Children, nursery school for (Coni.) in rearing of, 188; child development and family life with relation to education in general, 262-64; as reflection of home conflicts, attitudes, and adjustments, "the child takes the family to school with him," 264-72; child development centers' studies and experiments, 275; lectures on child psychology, 291; see also Family Children's Hospital, 289 Child Study Association of America, 275 Classical-general curricula, 92 Clientele, sources, 5, 8, 11; education, 6, 8, 10 (chart); marital status, 6; composition of the group, 7-11; birthplaces, 7; willingness to cooperate, 7; economic status, 9; intelligence scores, 9-11; a problem group? 12; single, compared with married, women, 13, 28; the twenty-one classifications for problems of, 17; their six major divisions, 23; experiment in channeling them into community service, 276-95 ( see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service); see also Case histories Colleges and universities, representation in study, 6, 8; women's needs and the curriculum, 92-118; help to student in making transition from home and school to, 228-30; evaluation of the way in which alumnae affect progressive change in education, 236; need of a philosophy of education for women and a clear comprehension of its relation to woman's changing role, 237-39; philosophy about woman's role and function more prevalent among women's colleges than among coeducational universities, 237; poor coordination of work which might have contributed to better health, 239-41, 243; slight correlation between training in, and social, cultural, and recreational oppor-
tunities after college, 241-43; inadequacy of courses designed to give competence in understanding personal and social economic problems, 243-47; inadequacies of vocational courses, 247-50; lack of training for housekeeping or homemaking, 250-52; lack of constructive program designed to give understanding of, and competence in, handling sex lives, 252-55; students find little help in achieving an orientation about religion and a personally adequate philosophy of life, 255-60; failure of courses supposed to contribute to personality development and to improve relationships, 260-62; child development and family life with relation to education, 262-64; see also Curriculum; Education College Women's Volunteer Service, beginnings of experiment, 276-80; formation of an enlarged committee, 279; plan of organization, 280 f.; group membership, 280, 282; organizational development, 281; individual membership, 282-84; seven-year records, 284-86; why volunteer service wanted, 286 f.; placement of volunteers, 287-89; special projects developed, 289-94 Columbia University, 275 Common sense, dependence of child rearing upon, 188 Community responsibility, case history of a woman with a marked sense of, text, 136-45 Community service, problems arising from client's relationship to, 22; student participation in, 231, 287; experiment in channeling college women into, 276-95; see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service Competitive situation of jealous sibling, 69, 171, 196, 202 ff. Consultation service, 4; see also Guidance
INDEX Coon, Beulah, 275 Cooperation of client, 7 Council of Social Agencies, 277 Courtship practices, conflict over, 57 Crises, problems arising from, 22, 53-56; outstanding situations, 53 f.; preparation for meeting, 55; case history of a woman who meets crises well, text, 121-36 Cultural and creative expression and outlets, problem of opportunities for, 241, 249 Cultural education, curricula for, 92, 111 Curriculum, college: and the needs of women, 92-118 ( see entries under Education); those designed to meet more adequately the needs of women students, 225 f.; less rigidity in courses and in sequence of courses, 226-28; departmental isolation, 227; theoretically includes student's total life situation, 232; widespread interest in development of: studies and surveys, 274 Detroit, study centered in, 6, 7; community service, 276-95 ( see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service) Detroit Advanced Intelligence Test, 9, 11 Diagram formulated as framework for case histories, 5 Differences, individual: three types: physical, intellectual, pattern of behavior, 121 Disease, see Health Domination, struggle between husband and wife for, 78, 85; case history of a woman who modified her tendency toward, text, 14965; parental, see Family Economic problems and courses: social, 243; individual and family, 244-47; suggestions growing out of data, 246; see also Finances
299
Education, questions concerning the problems women of today must meet, and their relation to the programs education must provide, 4; educational requirement for client, 6; attitudes toward, 20, 41 f.; responsibility for early influences upon children, 34, 35; responsibility for health education, 40 f.; study of, and prevention of, crises, 55; sex, 57, 110, 210, 215, 234; women's need and the college curriculum, 92-118; three types of curriculum, 92, 111; two case histories ( text ) illustrating need for a more specific and individual delineation of objectives: for a more discriminating sense of interrelation of fields of knowledge and their training possibilities, 93-106; where does responsibility lie, for training in personal-social area? 110; need for coordination and integration of curricula, 110 f.; directional emphasis of men's and women's, compared, 111-15; need for analysis of the cultural framework of women's lives, 113; of women realistically conceived, 115-18; synthesis and generalization re women's needs, 119-85; the ten generalizations, 120; task of assisting in development of personality, 165, 168; found wanting because need of women to be prepared for certain inevitabilities of life ignored by parents and educators, 186-220 (case history illustrating, text, 191-201; analysis of case, 20120); opportunity and obligation to provide help for the family through guidance of parents, 188, 209, 232 f.; aims and purposes vs. actual results, 190; need to understand and help the person vs. content of courses, 209; evidence that colleges have failed in preparing women for life, 212; obligations of, summarized, 219;
300
INDEX
Education ( Continued ) interpretation and suggestions re changing education for women, 221-72; observations on education in general, 222-39; better selection and training of teachers, 222-24; guidance and advisory service, 224 f., 225, 249 ( see Cuidance); extracurricular activities and responsibilities, 230-32; training students to become better parents: adult-parent education and counseling, 233; should be adapted to changing periods of individual's development, 234 f.; of men, to understand and live in a world with women and children, 235 f.; observations on specific fields of knowledge, 239-72; religious, 259; child development and family life with relation to, 26264; must start with the individual and his needs and affect both young people and parents throughout life, 264; preschool, 264; program for, and all that it implies, 265; problem for, in family relationships, 266-72; experimental studies and research, 273-75; centers of experimental study, 273 f.; see also Colleges; Curriculum Emotional growth and development, courses related to, 254 Employment, interim, after college, 114, 116; reëntrance into, 116; volunteer community service, 231, 276-95 ( see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service); see also Vocation Examinations, fear of, 42 Extracurricular activities and responsibilities, 230-32 Failing Student, The . . . ,275 Failure, 34, 42, 228 Family, parental domination, 19, 65, 68-75, 88, 90 ( a case history, text, 70-76); in-laws, 19, 88-90; health, 20; influence in life of
child, 32, 34 f., 42, 68, 77; influence of parents upon vocational choice, 43; conflict with >arents over religion, 46, 48; reasons, 68-78 (a case history, text, 70-76 ) ; family environment and parent-child relation the earliest and most potent of all influences, 68, 77, 166 f., 187, 232, 262; breaking away from, 69; pattern of parent-child relations repeated in next generation, 90; where lies responsibility for training of parents? 110, 167; cultural-parental objectives assigned to boys, 111; to girls, 114, 11Θ; no real status given to job of parenthood, 166; lack of special preparation for it, 167; opportunity and obligation of educators to provide help for family through guidance of parents, 188, 209, 232 f., 266; parents' need for long-time view of life in preparing children to meet its problems, 202; problems on which parents most need guidance, 207; help to student in making the transition from home and school to college, 228-30; child development and family life with relation to education in general, 262-64; as reflection of home conflicts, attitudes and adjustments, "the child takes the family to school with him," 264-72; participation of parents in preschool education, 264, 266; independence problem for children and parents, 269; books on education for family life, 275; see also Children; Husband Family Consultation Bureau, Teachers College, 275 Fear, see Insecurity Finances, problems involving, 21, 36, 50-53; insufficient income, 50; living within one's income, 52; lack of money as a limiting factor, 52; husband-wife attitudes toward, 84; inadequacy of courses
Í
INDEX designed to give understanding of social and personal economic problems, 243-47; three practical suggestions, 246 Fisher, Mary, 275 Fleming, Virginia Van Dyne, Roberts, K. E., and, 165 Folsom, Joseph, 275 Foods and nutrition, courses in, 226 Freshman year, difficulties, 228; importance, 229, 230 General-classical curricula, 92 Guidance, college counseling or advisory service functionally but not administratively related to psychiatric or academic departments, 224 f.; ignored preventive possibilities: operated on remedial basis, 225; difficulties of vocational guidance and education, 249; in sex matters, 255 Health, of self, 20, 38-41; of family, 20; need for research in psychosomatic aspects of, 39; responsibility for health education, 40 f.; effect upon personality pattern, 168; college health departments, 224; poor coordination of work which might have contributed to better health during and after college, 239-41; physical education, 242, 274; needs not met in college, 243; Student Health Service, 274 Health, Department of, 289 Ilea ton, Kenneth, 275 Home economics educators the source of best philosophy about women, 238 Houdlette, Harriet, 275 Housekeeping, problems, 21, 48-50, 250; lack of preparation for, 207, 209, 251 Human relations, see Relationships Husband-wife relations, 18, 78-88; sex difficulties a major source of conflict, 58; struggle for domination, 78, 85; a personality adjust-
301
ment-conflict pattern, 79; a case history, text, 80-84; differing attitudes toward money problem, 84; personal habits, 85; religious differences, 258; see also Marriage; Sex Illness, see Health Income, insufficient: the several angles, 50; see also Finances Individual, attitude toward self, 17; health of self, 20,38-41; personalfunctional curricula as aid to student's adequate functioning as, 92, 111; a composite mixture of interrelated currents of expression at all levels of activity, 110; each meets life according to her own pattern: way of patterning persists, 120-65 (three illustrative case studies, text, 121-36, 136-45, 149-65); differences recognized by educators, 120, 149; differences in ways of behaving not yet generally recognized, 121; personality development as a task of education, 165; interrelatedness of all aspects of life of, 167 f., 185; most situations recurrent within life span of, 169 f.; patterns of conduct determined by society, 172 f.; education should be adapted to changing periods of development, 234 f.; see also Personality Inglis Lectures (MacLean), 275 In-laws, relationship with, 19; parents-in-law, 88-90 Insecurity and inadequacy, underlying personality problems, 30, 31, 33; associated factors, 33-35; in relation to school activities, 42; to college, 228; in relations with associates, 67 Insight and resourcefulness, effectiveness of attack on problems determined by, 183-85 Institute of Euthenics, Vassar, 274 Intelligence and personality tests, 9-11 Interviewer, reliability of case his-
302
INDEX
Interviewer (Continued) tory dependent upon, 14; work of, 23 Intuition in the rearing of children, 188 Iowa, University of, 275 Iowa State College, 275 Jealousy of sibling, 69, 171, 196, Land-grant colleges, survey of, 274 Liberal arts college curricula, Dr. McHale's evaluation of, 274 Lloyd-Jones, Esther, 275 Lord, Eleanor Louisa, 275 McHale, Kathryn, 274 MacLean, Malcolm S., 274, 275 Marriage, marital status of client, 6; kinds of sex difficulty after, 57; as cultural-parental objective of ultimate goal for girl, 114, 116; case history of a woman who regarded marriage as goal and fulfillment of life, text, 12136, 174; and of one whose ambition was thwarted by it, text, 136-45; patterns set by social backgrounds of husband and wife, 172; failure of educators and parents to aid in preparation for, 214; men as barrier to women's progress, 235; less openminded, they expect adjustments to be made by wives, 236; demand for courses in, 255; and religion, 258; problem for education in husband-wife relations, 266 ff.; see also Husband-wife relations; Sex Men, social adjustments with, 67; directional emphasis of education for women and, 111-15; cultural-parental objectives assigned to, in American culture, 111; dominant goals and ambitions, 112; differentiation of function in roles of women and, 116; education should take into account their need to understand and live
in a world with women and children, 235f.; less adaptable and progressive than women: expect adjustments to be made by wives, 236 Mental hygiene, 242, 243 Merrill-Palmer Nursery School, 5 Merrill-Palmer School, Advisory Service for College Women ( q.v. ), 4; child development center, 275; experiment in channeling women into community service, 276-95 (see entries under College Women's Volunteer Service); workshop, 290, 291; lectures in chila psychology and nursery-school work, 291 Michigan, University of, 274 Mills College, 274 Minnesota, University of, 274 Missouri, University of, 275 Money problems, see Finances National Congress of Parents and Teachers, 275 National Society for the Study of Education, 274 New Design for Women's Education, A (Warren), 274 New York State Regents' Inquiry, 274 Nursery School, Merrill-Palmer, 5 Nursery-school work, lectures on, 291 Nursing organizations, 288, 289 Nutrition and foods, courses in, 226 Ohio State University, 273 Old age, feelings of satisfaction for men, 112; of frustration for women, 115 Parents, see Children; Family Parents-in-law, relationships with, 19, 88-90; need of interests and activities, 90 Parent-Teacher Association, 208 Pattern, individual, see Individual Persistence and Change in Personality Patterns ( Roberts and Fleming), 165n
INDEX Personal habits, 85 Personality, problems, 28-35; husband-wife problem an adjustment-conflict pattern, 79; development of, as a task of education, 165; parent-child relation the most potent influence in shaping, 166; interrelatedness of, with all aspects of individual experience, 167 f., 185; handicaps causing difficulties in personal adjustments, 248; failure of courses supposed to contribute to development of, 260; see also Individual Personality and intelligence tests, 9-11 Personality and the Cultural Pattern (Plant), 170 Personality-functional curricula, 92, 111 Philosophy of education for women needed, 237 ff.; colleges fall into four divisions, 238 Philosophy of life, failure of college to help in achievement of, 255-60 Physical education, 242, 274 Placement, centralized, for volunteers, 278, 287-89, 292, 293 Plant, James S., 170 Possessions, attitudes toward, 18 Problem group, clientele criticized as, 12 Problems, determination and evaluation of, 16; classifications, 17, 23; resulting from attitudes toward specific situations, 18; conclusions regarding, 26; fifteen areas discussed, 26-91; distribution and percentage of cases, 27; application of ten generalizations to education of women would tend to simplify and reduce, 119; no discrete: each must be met in relation to the total life, 167; most situations recurrent within life span of individual, 169 f.; effectiveness of women's active attack on, determined by their insight and resourcefulness, 183-
303
85; most often arise around certain predictable situations which parents and educators have ignored, 186; case history of a fortunate and well-schooled woman unprepared to meet actual problems, text, 191-201; analysis of case, 201-20; see also under type of problem, e.g., Education; Personality Professional life, curricula for, 92 Progressive Education Association, 274 Psychology courses, 260, 262 Psychosomatic aspects of health and disease, 39 Public Health Nursing, 289 Public Welfare, Department of, 277 Recreational and social needs, 22, 35-38; little correlation between after-college opportunities and, 241-43 Recurrent situations, 169 f. Relationships, with associates, 19, 64-68; influence in determining life pattern, 35; need for companionship, 37; problem of, with vocational peers and superiors, 45, 66, 248; getting along with people an outstanding problem, 45; preventable crises arising out of, 55; outstanding conflicts, 64, 65; early outstanding problems involved elders rather than peers: three developments later, 65; importance of the problem, 65; failure of courses supposeid to improve, to aid personality development, 260-62; problem for education in family relationships, 264-72; questions concerning, 268; to what extent can education make a contribution to? 269; see also Family Relatives, relationship with, 19, 6878; specific case history, text, 7076; parents-in-law, 88-90; see also Family Religion, attitudes toward, 20, 4648; failure of college to help in
304
INDEX
Religion ( Continued ) reorientation of ideas and in formulation of an adequate working philosophy, 256-60; impact of higher education upon: resulting loss of faith, 256; influence for children, 257, 258; in schools, 258; studies, 259 Research group, see Clientele Research studies related to this investigation, 273-75 Resourcefulness and insight, effectiveness of attack on problems determined by, 183-85 Roberts, Katherine E., and Fleming, V. Van D., 1Θ5 Role of men and of women, see Men; Women Sarah Lawrence College, 273 School, transition from home and, should have been prepared for in high school, 228; see also Education Self, attitude toward, 17; health of, 20, 38-41; see also Individual Seminars, departmental, 232 Sensitivity, 33 Sex, relationships, 19; unfavorable attitudes toward, 56; problems of adjustment, 56-64; courtship practices, 57; ignorance about, 57; difficulties after marriage, 57, 84; specific case histories, text, 59-64; heterosexual adjustments, 66; failure of education to touch upon or clear u p problems, 110; need of sex education at more than one stage of development, 170, 234; education given in home should be supplemented by school and college, 210, 215; misinformation and ignorance about, and cultural taboos, 253; failure of college to deal realistically with sex development, 254; consultation and guidance, 255; see also Husband-wife relationship; Marriage Shyness, 30-33
Siblings, jealousv, 69, 171, 196, 202 ff. Situations, problems resulting from attitudes toward specific, 18; recurrent, 169 f.; see also Problems Smith College, 275 Social and recreational needs, 22, 35-38; limitations through lack of money, 52 Social Competence in College Students ( L o r d ) , 275 Social service, see Community service Social training and education, collegiate: little correlation between after-college opportunities and, 241-43 Society, duty of higher education to give urge toward participation in development of, 111 ; culturalparental objectives assigned to boys, 111; to girls, 114, 116; men's role in, 112; women's role complicated, unclarified, and shifting, 115, 173-82 (three contrasting case histories, text, 12136, 136-45, 175-82); determines the form of life situations and sets up specific expectations which are confused or clear in varying degrees, 172 f. Spafford, Ivol, 275 Status of client, 17 Stephens College, 273 Strain and tension, 33, 39 Struggle basic to development of character, 219 Studies related to this investigation, 273-75 Study, bases of, 4-25, 273; see Advisory Service for College Women Subjects, criteria of selection of, 6 Teachers, relations with, 41, 65; better selection and training of, 222-24; academic vs. teaching qualifications, 222, 224; experience and fitness for adult-parent education, 233
INDEX Teachers College, Columbia University, 275 Technical-professional curricula, 92 Tension and strain, 33, 39 Thurstone Personality Schedule, 9 Time element, importance in collecting information, 15 Toys, homemade: by volunteers, 289 ff. Tunis, John R., 275 Unemployment, 43, 45 Universities, see Colleges and universities Vassar College, 274 Vernon-Allport Values, 11 Visiting Housekeepers Association, 277 Vocation, problems arising from, 21, 43-46; the two major problems, 45; difficulty of getting along with peers and superiors, 45, 66, 248; technical-professional curricula, 92; interim employment after college, 114, 116; reëntrance into employment, 116; women prepared to follow, but not to give up, 216; inadequacies of vocational courses, 247-50; dissatisfaction with job, 248; keeping in touch with one's own, through volunteer service, 286 Volunteer community service, participation by students, 231, 287; by graduates, 232, 276-95; see
305
entries under College Women's Volunteer Service Warren, Constance, 274 Was College Worth While? (Tunis), 275 "Whole child," phrase, 168 Wife, see Husband-wife relations Women, questions concerning their basic needs, problems, and role today, 3; directional emphasis of education for men and, compared, 111-18; cultural and family expectation of marriage as ultimate role for, 114, 116; role in our society complicated, linciar i£ ed, and shifting, 115, 173-82 (three contrasting case histories, text, 121-36, 136-45, 175-82); differentiation of function in roles of men and, 116; an understanding of the total development of women necessary to understanding them at any one stage, 182 f.; effectiveness of active attack on their problems determined by their insight and resourcefulness, 183-85; changing role and function in society not understood by men, 235; education should have clear comprehension of changing role, 237-39; attempts to study and reorganize curricula for, 274 Women in a Changing World, 275 Workshop, toy, 289 ff.; bookbinding, 290