Big Brother Skateboard Magazine - March 1998 [3 ed.]

March 1998 issue of the Big Brother skateboard magazine.

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(MARCH 1998» $3.99US,«

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‘SHOE PICTURED: CHECK OUT OUR WEB SITE AT DCSHOECOUSA.COM TO SEE THIS ‘SHOE IN ITS OTHER COLORS: WHITE, NAVY, BLACK, AND TAN, SYNTAX - GREY/NAVY

De TEAM: DANNY WAY COLIN MCKAY ROB DYRDEK RUDY JOHNSON RICK HOWARD MIKE CARROLL KEITH HUFNAGEL ‘CARL SHIPMAN SCOTT JOHNSTON CAINE GAYLE MOSES ITKONEN

* Very,

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888-532-3126

: MARCH INTRO NEWS

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TEMPLETON

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INTERVIEW

CONTEST

SKATEFLICKS CAL

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CONTENTS:

14

LETTERS ED

1998

98 100

106

108

REVIEWS

110

DESCENDENTS

111

,

Tie a ee A Dp eee ee Wiese ae ee feltures Heath volunteering his gardening skills to help trim a Totalbusiness's shrubbery. | mean, he really had to go out af his Cae eee een eae Ce ee ee ad Photo: Hick Kosick eee eee ae eeenL aee ‘concrete article with a hard flip atop the poocano—shit—voleano aa aaa

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BIGBROTHER PUBLISHER LARRY FLYNT PRESIDENT “IM KOHLS CORPORATE VICE-PRESIDENT DONNA HAHNER ART/EDITORIAL DIRECTOR JEFF TREMAINE EDITOR SEAN CUVER MANAGING EDITOR AVE CARNE WRITERS ‘CHRIS PONTIUS ‘CHRIS REED Gis THAXTON CAROLYN REID MARC MCKEE INU PAK DAVE BOYCE KE RIVERS. PHOTO EDITOR GK KOSIGK EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGR/ DMITRY EWYASHKEVICH PHOTOGRAPHERS TOBIN ELLAND DENNIS MCGRATH SEAN DOLINSKY GEOFF KULA ‘SOORATES LEAL ALEXIS ZAVIALOFF SUSANNA HOWE COPY CHIEF PHP SANGUINET COPY EDITOR INU PAK EDITORIAL ASSISTANT PAT CANALE OUR ADVERTISING DIRECTOR Wh FELL OFF THE WAGON HEATHER LEE JONES (213) 951-7848 ADVERTISING ASSISTANT DANIELLE SAXE NETWORK SYSTEMS DIRECTOR ‘ANDREA LANDRUM NETWORK SYSTEMS ADMINISTRAT BRANDON5.PHILLIPS NETWORK SYSTEMS OPERATOR: LARRY©, FLYNTJA, MARE 8, QUIROS PRODUCTION MANAGER ‘KRISTINA ETCHISON PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS USAW. JONES [AUSON SHURPIN ADVERTISING PRODUCTION DIREC: GINAJ.LEE ADVERTISING PRODUCTION COORDII MARA LITINSKY SUBSCRIPTION DIRECTOR TRISH HAMM EXECUTIVE VICE-PRESIDENT THOMAS CANOY ( VICE-PRESIDENT, ADVERTISING PERRY GRAYSON VICE-PRESIDENT, MULTIMEDIA FRANCESCA SCALP VICE-PRESIDENT, FINANCE ‘DAVIO WOLINSKY

It you ever visit the Santa Rosa skate park, keep an eye out for Tony Trujillo. He's preity easy to spot because he has a gigantic bone stuck in his nose.

es ut of all the things I'vecreated:-none have been more appreciated bymyfriendsthantheconceptof‘The Feather" You've heardthembefore.

A feather"isapoignant

at you. Its organized eas way

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a buried need that someone “spits”

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exploits of a stranger. From that day on |vowed

every one ofthem flutter to the ground, ignored. Id even nized the phenomenon, itbecame painfully obvious that this. idate theirstupid lives and petty conquests by talking out loud about impossible to ignore.There is, however, another kind of feather spittér

CGHET

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Look good fortune in the face and win “66 Classic car, but the only way it wi happen is to enter the Vans “Soul Remai

Bt [6 ie Same” Sweepstakes. You could win a “66 assic car, Consolidated Skateboards or Vans

oes. Enter to win anywhere that Vans are sold.

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PHOTO: JOSEPH ILAN

200 YORK . 1998 . PRPRIM BICI . ROBBIE GANGEMI . HAROLD HUNTER . JEFFERSON PANG . VINNY PONTE

SEVERE STORM WARNING:A POWERFUL STORM SYSTEM OUT OF THE EAST IS EXPECTED TO CAUSE MAJOR DAMAGE”

XOPOLITAN AREA. ALL OTHER REGIONS ARE AT SERIOUS RISK. TAKE PRECAUTIONS IMMEDIATELY. THIS IS NOT A TEST.

NOLLIE270KFBY GEO REDA. BIC|WOULDLIKETO SAYI LOVEYOUBAKIM’ . BAKIMPRO MODEL OUT2015. IMPLEMENTING THETWENTY YEARPLAN .9"WIDE 'WIDELOAD'BOARD NOW AVAILABLE. NEW VIDEO SOON

soz RAP/ELAGK ANF RIDER: LIV

No Response for Little Baby "Sup Dear Big Brother, ‘Sup dude? Yo man | can't skate worth shit and | don't even have a

‘skateboard, but | read your magazine. It's cool. | like the pornography and ‘shit and the shoe adds and all that shit that's in your mag. I's the best skate

mag on the market. Well, | blade, but I'm no good at that either. I'm no poser though, cause | don't try to show of and shit. | hate posers. | don't even know why I'm e-mailing you. Guess I'm stoned or somethin. I'm 13 and | smoke,

drink, snort, and cum on hot spanish prostitutes. Well, | got to go out so see

ya

Reader,

Daniel Lynn [email protected]

Naked Asian Aces Caleulus big brother,

we just got the latest issue today and read the Pimps to the Pros article in the News ... we see that the video was postponed until a later date and would like to be the first to volunteer for the job and any other stunt cock jobs that arise in the future . so tell Angela Rave at Cream that she can always have at least three skater stunt cocks to count on... your loyal readers, Dustin, Brad, and Noah [email protected] PS. Noah has experience (being an on set stunt cock that was never used)

‘The Sneaky Firemen in the Shadows Big Brother, Are names are Doug and Doug. We have been boarding about four years. Were both from Orlando Florida, we both got into some serious shit that they fucking sent our asses to military school and its a bunch of bull shit

‘we cant skate and people diss us for skating here. So we got this plan to burn down the fucking school, but we don't know how to do it. So we thought

that we would ask the experts. We don't care how fucked up your plans are, we just need something to scare the shit out of all the fagets atthisschool! Doug and Doug CulverMilitary Academy South Bend, IN

Idon't care if you burn your school down, but when the firemen come to res‘cue you, run like hell. Theyre a bunch ofperverts, andif they catch you, they'l tty to wrap you up in blankets and snuggle with you. Paramedics are even worse. When they rip your clothes off to check your injuries, you'll most likely be getting a finger shoved up your ass and a penis tugging —Chris

Muy Gustar Honbres Durmientes Dear Big Brother: My friend Bob and| like your magazine. | personally think it's really funny, interesting, and at times disturbing; but that's cool too and|like it. Anyway, the reason | am writing is this: | just read the December issue Pancho Moler on the cover; after seeing what you guys did to Steve Black's

face with a marker and to the “Jack and a fork” guy, | was hoping you could give'me some pointers. See we know this other guy who's a real asshole, and at parties he likes to get really drunk and pass out, Bob and | (Larry) would like to exploit this to make as big an ass out of him as possible. Any tips you could give us on things we could do to him would be greatly appreted. Bob and |will take lots of photos and send youafollow-up letter to

prove how much we learned. Thanks!

Larry Shomar San Juan, PR

The other day this guy from Puerto Rico bought me some beer while | was waiting for my friends. The guy was like 50 years old, and | started realizing that he was walking on the funny side of town, ifyou know what I mean. During my second beer, | went outside to see if my friends had shown up yet, and | think he put Ruffinal (the date-rape drug!) in my drink. He told me that my friends weren't showing up, and we should go drink more somewhere else. | felt kind of loopy, but thanks to my experience with drugs, | was able to identify the foreign substance and escape.—Chris

Why would they want you guys? Youre not even pros! On top of that, youre probably Asian. How often do you see an Asian man in a porno movie? | don't ‘mean to sound like a racist, but nobody needs to see that kind of garbage. If you are in the movie, you should only be seen in the background performing flying karate kicks and completing math problems.—Chris

Psychopathic Christians Who the Girls at School Don’t Like Dear Chris, J was reading the November issue and was sadend and mad to see you putting down the Bible. First of all God is refering to how you are to be ci cumcised to show that you reconized him and his power. He is not a sadistic and perverted fellow, What you need is to read the Bible and see that if you don't love and belive in God your life is dead already. You say burn the Bible and curse God to show that he cant control you and to make his heart burn. Well | wish you @ good life in hell, Joel 2: 1-2 is a good scripture. It will tell you what will happen to you. Bill K Kerman, CA

I youre such a good Christian, why the hell are you reading this magazine?! Is it one of your secret, naughty things that you hide underneath your bed with ‘your barbells and lotions? Why are you judging me anyway? As a Christian, you're supposed to love me and accept me and let God be the judge. If God could talk, He would probably call you a freak and yell at you for trying to do His job for Him. | was just joking around, but you, you're serious. It looks like you're the one who will be going to hell!—Chris.

Oedipal Gomplexities Dear Big Brother,

''m writing in regards of all these fucked up moms who read their son's magazine. That pisses me off when you can't have a mag ‘cause it has cuss words, drugs, and porno. Fuck them! Those moms are so fucking retarded | wish | could kic all their asses. | don’t fucking care if a mag has cuss words and porno, | read it for the skateboarding. Don’t gimme that shit:"! was reading my son's magazine, when | saw . ” Fuck you! | just want to say fuck you to all moms who are being fags about magazines. Including my fucking, shit licking, fingerbanging, vagina sucking mom. Fuck you allll! Skateboard, Kick rollerblader’s asses, Ask for money, Tell moms to "FUCK OFF” our magazine, Eager to be flashed, Read Big Brother magazine. James Lemon Roseville, CA

James, you're out of your fuckin’mind.—Chris

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Mystical Reader Stands Up for Show and Tell

Beer Big Bro, |live in this gay-ass richie town where all anyone cares about is money and fuckin’ religion. What the hell? There's maybe afew of us who could give a fuck less and are down w/ nothing but sk8ting and music. These dumbass

religious freaks are just insecure about themselves. That's all religion is, a big set of rules to bounce off of. | went w/ my friend to this Christian church youth group type thing to sk8 and we skated for about 10% of the time, which pissed me off, The rest was preaching and slow, godly, horrible music. ‘The whole time | thought to myself, how can anyone get stoked on this?? ‘The big thing that the coo! kids at my school are doing is wearing these

bracelets that say W.W.J.D.? Which means What Would Jesus Do? Complete bulishit. Me and Jesus were and are 2 seperate individuals. What he'd have and what I'd have done in a given situation are gonna be different, more than

likely. People don't realized it, but a religious man is a man more or less free of moral choice. Hell, read A Clockwork Orange! With drugs and the “new

technique" Alex, ex-murderer turned into aslave of his own emotions, A thorough Christian, Sex, music, art and violence were all sinful and whenever he

‘came into contact w/ any of that he felt like puking. After all Christianity says

that sexual intercourse is a sin doesn't it? Fuck that I'll shagg if | wanna. So to all you children of god or bog or whatever, slooshy me when|say to rebel.

Go against what your pee and em have told you and become not atheist, but religiously independent. Believe that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, and that there is no such thing as death, heaven or hell. Life is but a dream in the imagination of ourselves. Believe in reincarnation.

That's what really happens. We as humans are recycled like soda cans, souls carry on from one vehicle to the next to ruin or accomplish what he/she sees fit, all throughout time. And you can kiss my sharries. Good night. lan Summers Carmel, IN

Your letter made me think of poor Bill K. from Kerman, California, Like many reborn Christians, he is doomed to become the ball monitor at his local junior high school. When the boys are changing, he will stroll through the locket room, staring at them and patting the boys on their backs. He will talk to theit penises, and none of the parents or teachers will suspectathing because he fs @ youth pastor. At bedtime, he will sit up in bed, crying and whipping himseli in shame.—Chris

Gaying Off on the Internet

é iE

For the few of you who have managed to find your way through the void of cyberspac Noone CU Ou ue Re a there in wait. Primarily this is becausehiscomputer is the designated site for oure-mat aildress, [email protected], but it should also be noted that for as much time asDavt enjays nipping at the bottle, he enjoys spending an even greater amount of time tappin SO Oe eT ed a Pe CR RUE RC CROC Ce aS Cee Ce ee a eee eM cos Pees Cena: aR cet Ue me Mia Ror: Mee hing wrong wit r Pearse nat Tee

~

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Get Fuct’on Video. The new Skateboard/Piss Drinking/Rockcumentary/Graffitti/Vandalising video from Fuct. Introducing Fuct team riders: Abijah, his brother Gabriel, Guy Hartley Louie Louie, Damon, Tim Wells, Chip adams & loads of other Bullshit.

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—barker barrett, in regards to something mean he said about someone at the ventura contest

—socrates leal, regarding the ventura skate park —dave boyce, aka. si.b., sluggo's litle brother

—blake hannon, giant team manager —alan petersen, whan asked how old his giniriend was

Wholesome News Bits

Unwholesome News Bits

Just for the fun of it, pretend you are the president of a big-time skate shoe corporation. At the end of the year, you decide to takea little stroll into the shipping area of your warehouse and happen to discover it clogged with all kinds of unsold product

Balance team manager, Aaron Pearcy, found himself engaged in a battle of alcoholinduced smarts with a buddy of his while partying

from 1997. What do you do? Do you throw open:

dared to bury the neck of a Heineken bottle up his

your back door and hold a blowout sale and run the

butt-hole. If he was

75-mile radius? Of course not, silly! Obviously you

task, then the chal-

remember that Christmas is meant to beatime of

lenger would

risk of offending every single skate shop within a —r. muska, following his interview in issue #32

—ike ballard, on a recent trip to new yark city

—scdtt johnston, belore getting “that drunk on new years eve

back in his hometown of Phoenix, Arizona, The

gauntlet was first thrown down when Pearcy was

to complete

this be

giving—or, in other words, you host a charity event!

required to pierce

Let's face it, nothing looks better on the tax records than a hefty donation to a worthwhile cause. Enter

his dick.

Sole Technology Inc., the proud manufacturers of @S, Emerica and Etnies (their Sheep line has been discontinued for ‘98). Pierre Andre ‘Senizerques, the president and CEO of Sole, expressed it best with his misty-eyed sentiment of, “Since skateboarding derived from the streets, (he)

Following

Pearcy’s insertion

of the anal-beerprobe, the two took their duel into the kitchen, where they proceeded to sterilize a needle with a

wanted to give back to the streets.” No, not to the

Bic some

the droors christmas party

skateboarders themselves, but to the unfortunate men, women and children who are homeless and/or destitute in the Los Angeles area. So, on

10,000 pairs of shoes at the L.A. Mission. Word has —damon way, after trying to have a

it that the Jamie Thomas Emerica model and the

along the ine between jabbing

—dimitry elyashkevich, when asked what happened at

conversation with putf daddy

Christmas eve, Pierre, Don Brown and a handful of their cobbiing elves personally handed out over

lighter

and

vodka

and

puncture their penises in unison. Unfortunately for Aaron, somewhere

well among the vegetariar/Earth-conscious sect of

Ed Templeton Sheep model went over extremely

the needle into his shaft and out

the homeless population.

through the top of

his

mushroom

A pierced Pearcy.

pole, he popped a blood vessel and began to drip @ profuse amount of blood all over the linoleum

—z shaw, 49, a lilelong hockey fan, regardingted

turers choice ofthe “thrashers" for atlanla’s new pro hockey team

floor. All he had to say at the time was,

“That hurt

bad,” but when he was sighted later the next day, he reported to have a blood blister on the head of

his cock and experiencing a fair amount of discomfort.

Pig Wheels premiered its brand-new video,

All Systems Go, during the Tumyeto Christmas

—erik ellington, in response to the proposed idea, ofedlempleton slidingarailwhile ‘buck-naked and at full mast

—aaron pearcy, balance team manager —heath kirchart, regarding the big brother public skate park

—neil diol, some kid in brazil

Putt Daddy, Mike B. and Kelly “Yo!I'min this piece!” Bird. Dub dropped a healthy bundle of cash and product to sponsor the official Puff Daddy afterParties, which took place on his recent U.S. tour. Just to make sure they were getting their money's worth, Ken Block, Damon Way, Kelly Bird, Clyde Singleton, Mike Ballard and Alyasha Moore geared up in the puffiest Dub gear they could find and went up north to Portland, Oregon, to catch Puff Daddy's concert with Busta Rhymes and Usher at the Rose Arena. Following the show, the crew headed backstage for the official afterparty to puffy up with Puff and his posse, where Damon Way finally came to the harsh realization that he is indeed a white man.

party on December 19 in San Diego. Et Ellington became so choked up by the whole affair that he eventually had to run out into the

street and release his holiday spirits on the sidewalk. Matt Mumford was so touched by his fellow

teammate's liquid-yawn tidings that he went and joined him on the curb. Apparently, it's customary in Australia to console your fallen comrades by spewing right along with them because Matt

tammed his fingers down his throat and forced his ‘own stomach into the spirit of giving as well. The mere sight of this gesture of true brotherly love brought out similar feelings in Scott Copalman, who ran out and quickly became the third link in their puking chain. Together, the three Zeroteers

went on to adorn the gutter with a collective assortment of festive cheer.

Daxter Lussier is switch-hee! flipping forjoy because he's @ new am on Osiris andhedoesn't have to pay$70fora pair of shoes anymore. Margera, Mike Maldonado, Kenny Hughes and though he has been a practitioner and disciple in the Splish Splash | Was Brian Seber. Corporate tycoon/billionaire Ted Sacted Order of Alcohol for quite some time now, he Turner is alleged to be in the process of attempt- still managed to misjudge a staircase and send his Takin’ a Bath Itwon't be long before JeffToland is sitting at ing to sue Thrasher magazine for having trade- righty frame tumbling down one and a half fights of the bar and buying his own drinks from now on marked the name “Thrasher” some 15 odd years stairs while at a house party. Mike was fine—the because he's getting his second wind as a profes- betore he had a chance to use it for his new NHL. ‘same probably can't be said for the stairs—but he sional skater on Consolidated. Adrian Lopez, expansion team, the Atlanta Thrashers, in losthistrusty Yashica T-4 in the process. 41999—huh? Vinnie Ponte, Danny Supa and Danny Montoya are all sporting a brand-new wardrobe, care of Bullshit...or Not? Stepson outerwear. The Stepson line was origiNew York State of Mind When everyone in the skateboard industry nally geared toward the aggressive snowboard Scott Johnston and Mike Ballard both took returned to work on Monday, January 5, they were enthusiast, but Brethren Distribution decided to two big,.giant steps into the New Year whilst they surprised to find a rather starting rumor eagerly were partying away the last hours of '97 in New York extend their clothier knowledge to the skateboard awaiting their ears. The rumor, which had originated crowd as well, The merry ol’lads over at New Deal City. Scott, who has always presented himself as the on the Internet, concerned the reported death of picked up their fellow mate Carl Shipman once clean-cut kid from Baltimore, permanently sullied Kareem Campbell, and it succeeded in lighting the he stopped skating to the tune of Stereo. Jon this image forever when he decided to throw in the World Industries switchboard up like the Vegas West's income for '98 will be going strip as they fielded calls all day long in due north ‘cause he’s turning pro for regards to the hoax. For those of you Foundation. in order to fill the who aren't “privileged” enough to have vacancy left on the am team, access to the world wide wasteland, the Foundation enlisted the aid of Oak ‘story read like this: ‘The skateboard Town resident Greg Gardner for world has changed drastically over the additional team support services. last 24 hours, Pro skateboarder ‘Aaron Harrison decided to just up Kareem Campbell was killed earlier and quit Zero one day—not because today. Kareem and the Menace crew he wanted to ride for another team were at a party when Joey Suriel’s but simply because he doesn't want firearm accidentally discharged and to ride for any team whatsoever. ‘shot Mr. Campbell in the chest. Guests’ Mike Vallely is the latest to reactions ranged from surprise to disreceive a pro model shoe on Etnies, may. Billy Valdez acted swiftly and while Alphonso Rawls is the latest responsibly by calling the police, who to lose a pro model shoe on Kastel. arrested and jailed the intoxicated Curiously, Chris Lambert has termi Suriel. He is set for arraignment on nated his association with Kastel too Monday, January 5, 1998. Kareem was (Note: The preceding sentence is What the girls of NewYorkfail to realize is that you can never get enough ofbig Mike in intensive care for eight hours and Ballard. Here he is at the Droors Christmas party with Dimitry and Thomas Campbell. then died during an attempt to remove best read in an ominous foreshadowing tone of voice, preferably something along the towel on his straight-edge lifestyle and submit him- the bullet from his breastplate. Fabian Alomar was lines of Boris Karloff]. As if Pig Wheels and Zero self to the wiles of alcohol. Ultimately, what began as placed in charge of all Menace’s business transaca carefree fling ended in a solid one-night stand (or tions until further notice. Kareem Campbell was a Wheels weren't enough for them, Tumyeto ibution is preparing to launch a third line of stumble) as Scott was seen swiling and spiling ‘super-talented skateboarder and will be missed wheels. This one is going to be called Landspeed numerous vodka cranberries, and anyone who really by fellow skateboarders’ Perhaps even more Research, and it will be manned at the helm by wound up within arm's reach of him received an ear- incredulous than the story ital isthe fact that it was Rob Erickson, former CEO of Wheelie Co., but ful of, "Youte my nigga!” sprayed into the nooks and believed by well over half the industry and a few disprimarily fueled by the likes of Kerry Getz, Bam crannies of their aural canals, As for Ballard, even traught youths in Sweden and Brazil

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‘Ihonestly don'tknowhowthisallstarted.

‘Like,whendiditbecome “Iwasgay"? |

‘mean,I'mopensexually. |talkaboutsexin afrankmanner, |don’thave a problem with ‘gaypeople,andI'mnotgay.'mnothomo‘phobic, andityou're nothomophobic in _skateboarding, you're gay. If yoll don't ‘exclaim how much youshale “fags,/how. ‘muchyou'renotafag,how uch you likelto “fuckchicks,’ thenyou're gay. fm married. ‘I'msecure withmysexuality. I'll make jokes

aboutdicks. I'llhavedicks In my art

‘shows—that's whereitstarted astually. In 1994 | didanartshow’‘at theAlleged

GalleryinNewYork,and | put Polaroids of

my dick onthewall.All the New York skaters werepretty pissed off about it from

‘what|hear. No one fever said anything directly tome,but | heatedthey thought| ‘was a fag.That'sfine.I'ssomething [could ‘carelessabout. Have you ever had a homosexual ‘encounter? ‘No,| haven'tactually. I'veneverwanted'to ‘humpany guys,andnoone'severtried-to hump me. People have hit on me and ‘stuft—that's normalthough. |findthatflattering. | knowfora lotofguys,that'stheir hhe

excuse, “Some guyhiton

‘Yeah, XYZ hasashirt witharainbowflag—thegayrightsrainbow—and itsgot ‘machine-gun holesinit,insinuating, "WekillfagsI thinkthat'sridiculous. Itslike,

why gotothatlengthtoputthatona shirttotellpeople,"Wedefinitelylikegirls” ‘Yeah... Youdon'tneedtodo that.|don’tthinkthose kindofpoliticsshouldbebrought ‘Hasanything ever beeninyour

intoskateboarding becausethey'temoronicandtakesallof skateboardingdown. backdoor? Itshows a badsideofskateboarding. ‘Have you ever been part ofa ‘Whatdoyouthinkabout tS an inlefesting|Subjéct tome,and TeteWeskeeven tteyer fot ‘threesome? "No. Forsome reasonthere'sthis like apromoter of porn/or anything, |have a flirtatious adventure withitonceina While. | ques I'mjust curious abouteverythingse%ually,so,|usthaveanappetite perceptign Of me that I'm this forlooking atstulf. 'm not ke a conventionalbuylé porn'miag andjerkoff”type. high-roli’setfiendguy,andIve ‘onlyhumped twogifsinmylifel ‘guy. |'ve thought aboutit a lot;it'sahard subjectforme.|'msire itexploitswomen in'some ways, but then the people whoate in it do it formioneyandtheywant to: Andoneofthemismywife,and

do it. But then sex is used to sell everything. It's getting to the point where-

‘I'veknown fer fortenyears. My.

because ofthe rise in pornography outlets and sex on TV,youalso seeanamaz™ -sexlifeisplainJane.Peoplethink |talk ing tise in eating disorders with girls and sexual promiscuity withteenagers.) ‘Tmthis*Sexguy”because

skate atthepark near thehigh school,andwhenschool getsout,these girls walk bbyandtheyre wearing completeslutoutfits! It justgetsWorse every year.The

‘ageofinnocence ‘getsjowerandlower.

‘When you have intercourse, what kind of noises do you make ordo you ‘struggle toremainsilent?

Idepends.on where youare. Okay,Whereisthestrangestplaceyou've hadsex? Um...in bed withsomeone else,ona swingset,thewomen's bathroom ‘atLEP—Idon'tknow),I'gon'tthifk,}e doneanystranger placesthan ‘mostpeople.

‘openlyaboutsexual mattersand |

‘have!paintings withnaked people _and |takephotosofmydick.Allof -asudden,I'mthis“masterofsex” and lm mot.Mostpeoplein the

‘does Whattheywanttodo,first ‘off! Want:tomakethatclear. 100scaredoffvingllShe grew up Catholic, sosomewhere deepinsideher,no ‘You'easkingmeaboutmyopin-

Are youpart ofthe“MileHigh” club?

Nope.Deanna thinks.the,plané|will automatically crashifwehumponit.She's:

matterhowmarriedweare,.itS stila sintohavesex.Sothatsinwillcausethe ion, and'}/mtelling you,that'sthe

‘stupidest thingyoucoulddoin

‘me—fuck thatshit!I'lkickhisassforthat!” planetogostraightdown. ifiedfohumpherina churchinEurope,andshe I Sowhatifsomeonethinks I'mhandsome,

‘theworld.That'slikea bumper

yoursexualpreferente. Ifyou're notadult

You putabumper stickeronyour ‘carnotbecause youlikeitbut

That doesn'tmean |wanttohump them.It's. enough torealize that there's alltypesof

differentpeopleinthetworldand thatyou ‘havetolivewitheveryane,thenyou'restu‘pid,asfaras'm cofeemed.

‘Whydoyouthink skatersaresohomophobic?|

‘Ithinkit'sjusta guything. Anything that has

"skating, but'msureit'sjustasbadinother

sticker. | hate bumperstickers.

‘because youdesiretotellsome-

oneelsewhatyou'einto.!don't do any drugs atall:|don't smoke, |don'tdrink,and |don't ‘takeTylenols, butithasnothing

to do with the straight edge

‘movement atall.|don'thaveto ‘makemy whole persona outof

‘thisonecholee |madeinmylife.

‘made thechoice, I'moverit,

and |justlivenow.|justwant to

SADE FOR VAGINAL _

How doyoufeelabout the

“faction?

vegan

_[thinkitdoesalotofbad stuff

‘Imean, I'mtotally into showing

‘people howgooditis10eat this

_way—it's healthy,compassion

ate,allthesethings.Butthere's

‘whatsoever isthewaytodoit. Notbending

‘doesn'tgetyouanywhere, It'slkeifyou'e. atreeandthewindcomes.and blows real. hard, you're gonna “get=knocked over

‘becauseyou're too” rigid. Bilt'al blade: _grassswayswiththewind-—it bends and it ‘staysupanditstrvives:

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RcouneE|

INTe

Okay, you'reina planetoChilewithyourteam, you.crash in the Andes,andyoudon'thave

yourlittlebagofveganvittles.Do you

‘start eating teammates? What aréwe, ike up above thi timberline? ‘Have you everexperimentYou're fucked. edwithalcohol? So there's no berries or anything? Well, yeah, 1 Ive takehl'sip Fiereorthere would eat meal. Survival is survival. 'm not gonna just to remind me fibwshitty just die, You know what, this is the classic “catch it tastes. | seriously! "don't the vegan admitting he'l eat meat.” People love to know how anyone starts. Maybe | was just never the gel a vegan to say, “Yes, | would eat meat” Like He's one of us deep down inside, He's a carn person to be peer-pressured, vore!” So yeah, whatever. or maybe | was scared that Who would you eat first? Vd get fucked-up—probably It would have to be Brian Anderson ‘cause he's the more that—but my fear of biggest. Heidhave to take one fortheteam ‘cause getting drunk outweighed the he could feeda lot of people. The reasonitim even fear of having my friends think 1 was lame for not doing vegetarian isbecause welive ina place where you ‘ean Qoright tothe eore# and get food of any type. what they were. Smoking, ‘You don't have to chdose animal products: |just

‘thesehardtiner guys,straight ‘edge/vegan power dudes, and theirmode of action islike a skinhead, Like,"fyoudon't do

"whatwe're doing, wee gonna

“kick yourass” The bestinflu-

“enceyou an ever have isby ‘example. That'stheonlyway you can éoanything. Maybe somekidsseemeat a skate

park,andtheyseemeskating

“uctsandhow the system is ‘so unclean—that everyone should be interested in.

‘same thing. Who takes @ hit

‘think that-with all the options, fi ratherchoose -_ offa cigarette, gets that lungthose prodiicts.1've drivenacross thecountry, Ive piercing feeling and goes, ‘been in Buttfuck,/ Texas;anidyou danstilfind’a “Yeeeah, that was fucking place thathasnonmieat food.Itseasy ityout ‘awesome’ ompassionate. I'mnotsayingyou'reanuncom: What's it like” when you Well,itsstraightoutoftheTao. Itsounds ‘passionaifé fool, youeatmeat.| mean,you-have- find yourself inaroom full, ‘kooky,buttheymake sense,Tree, grass, toknowaboutitfirst. youreadsomeofthethings - ofdrumikards? ‘wind—you thinkaboutthatstuf,andit's ‘IvereadorseensomeofthethingsI'veseen,then ‘itsfunny.Once in a while it ‘easyto thinkaboutinregular ite.Influence maybe youwouldchangeyourmind.Asidefrom ‘getsdepressing, but it's just ‘andbyexampleistheonlyWayyoucan Kilingthingsunnecessarily, it'sjustthehealthofit. fodder to write about. Il go everdoanything. Thepeoplewho | get | think itsdefinitely something inthis timeand ‘ontourwithmyteam,andits anddiseases “influence fromoutintheworldarethepeo- age—with all themeat poisoning funnytosit back, watchand take photos of thenijigetting plewhosayfuckyoutoeveryone anddo ‘whattheywant.Yougetinterestedinthem ‘drunk andhaving ).good andfindoutwhatthey dé,Theyre not time.|realizethese guysare ‘elingyou,andthat'stheBeautyofit. having a good time, That's ‘Hasanyone everslipped youa meat

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‘don'tneedtodothatis have agoodtime. I'm @ person who doesn't git bored. | never getthose feelings like, “Ohgod, nothing's goingon;

|shouldjustogeink’

Photo: When we showed up at this rail in eae ae ed in and covered with rocks. A construction eee ey gee ee 1 broom s0 | could 50-50 it. Notice how Ce ee eed Pe ee eenae Sequence: At this spot in Phoenix, Arizona, ete a ead grind to b's tailslide five times. Afterthiswe eng eu eens

COMES

To THE NAME —-LUKE—

Pia Mola Remep

er

DVERTISING CAMPALN

‘What's it like being a member of the skate art community? Briefly describe your spiritual outlook. Its an honor honestly. When | was a kid, | looked at skateboard magOrganizéd religion is Stopid. Death is a big fear; novonie wanis (6'die. I mean, its a totally natazines, and the people Who were the raddest to me were like Chris tral rellex or feeling to not want to die. So we invent this cushion: Youre not gonna dle really, you go to heaven, and it's a nice place—if you do the right things of course, Then organized Miller, Mark Gonzales, Nell Blender—people who were doing something artistie. They wereiihnovative and funny. Skateboarding has many religions come along, exploit them, and throughout history, its been a bunch of crap—people facets, and I think that part of skateboarding is what attracted me to it having power over people and making money off them. Im sure Jesus Christ was an extraorin the first plage. YoU ean be an individual, be creative—you can do dinary man at one point andtaught greatthings, ThepeoWhatever you Want jiskateboarding. Everything I'm doing in my life ple who followed him and kept his comes fromm love of skateboarding and art, so being a part ofthis tradition, though, have molested NOTE To MYSELF ‘community is a good feeling to me ‘cause, hopetully, there's kids out his teachings. Whatever he did there looking at the magazines going, “Look what these guys are has been totally raped. When | WASTE Your DAYS doing, tis is cool, this isdifferent” was smart enough to ask SITTING ON THE CovcH Talk aboutt yourart.Specifically the transition from fullyerdetbon- questions, |asked my grand- STARING Ar THE Tov. ers to dinosaurs. parents what happened to the SOCcKLESS ‘There it goes again. “Fully erect boners.” I've done one painting with a people in India who believe in WHEN You GET TIRES boner, taken a couple photos of boners, and now I'm “The Boner Guy.” Buddha. She said they went to Well, for any kids who are interested in my art, | don't paint boners. The hell. These people are doing CHECK Yo SEE IF THE ‘majority of stuf |do is portraits of people, sometimes naked, but hot all what they think is right, living DooR 1 np & the time. And dinosaurs? | mean, I've only painted a couple dinosaurs! theit life not killing, lying or 5S tocken A stealing, and then they go to hel DEAD Bote D ‘You guys are trying to generalize it, But whatever.There's no transition; there's no form. The only real trend in my art has been people, ItS rare because they believed in avfat guy to have one of my paintings that doesn't have a portrait in it of some instead of a hippy? There are people Wiho are religious on their own, and that's the kind 6f relisort. There's always some kind of human interaction, Any artist, what gion | encourage. Everyone should be spiritual in their own way. | have my own things that! do they're doing is communication, People look at your stuff and find that could be seen as spiritual—things that cater to a soul. | just dont think need some kind of message or create their own. | have something {0 look at a'book, listen to a guy or pay 10% of my salary to do those things to say, and 'm saying it through this. | have a vision that |



et >

— gy

(| think it's the same guy), and the bowls and volcano

x tii bd ee

¥

wrt

For one, like Santa Rosa, there are no grindable edges

;

MAL ohbsSE Se

“Metaluma’? She is. This may be the closest park to San Francisco—only 20 minutes from the Golden Gate Bridge (the red one that everybody drives over, parks and then walks from one end to the other and then back). I's fun. Besides one ill-placed handrailing, this is a good park. 'd heard that the original plans the skaters drew up were way better, but they were ignored by the jackass who designed the park. =

ee aE

about the place. Old farts like Jason Jessee and Tommy

>

a

aren't proportioned properly. Still, opinions are mixed Guerrero like it. Besides the bowls, the park consists of

=~

a lump, a halved eyeball lump, a fun-box with a grind-

able curb, some rails, stairs, and it’s all surrounded by a knee-high bank. Negatives include: little girls with pierced navels sitting on benches smoking cigarettes, a Stove Roetterhasbeen a partofthe NorCalscene for 2 long time and can offen be found rippingeatitha) ‘Santa Rosa park. Here he tall-bones a t/s airoutof the bow! at Petaluma. You can bone your girlfriend, and ‘you can bone your nose, butyou can't bone yourgirltriend’s nase. You can bone her tail though.

similarly blurry helmet * NEA

law and

fully padded

rollerbladers squabbling amongst themselves atop the

OOLNSKY SEAN

volcano. This is the only park I've witnessed rollerbladers—who seem like such a united group— make fun of their own peers.

DOLINSKY SEAN

ids Wave to the crowd While the drool from their chins tay on course. When it's all Youle bar and gets drunk nd sings songs. jpeople will retire to the skate park. Nanda Zipp b’s grab. Seqiiéhce: Do you know whatabutlerface”is® 183 glttwho bas a greatbody,BUTHER face is tuglvelwish Mike Fuscek was doingan eggplant so,thereyiould'be eggs find butter In this capton) bupit's Justa Kick-ip o-texte:

|

ill Pepper thinks that this is the best park in the world. | wouldn't say that its bad, Id just say that its the best park in Napa. There's a 45-degree bank, a lump, an irrigation ditch, a big doughnut, a small fun-box and the very popular recluse curb all crammed into a very small area, No pads are required Yay.You know what else is in Napa, though, don't you? Wine! Miles and miles of vineyards and free wine tastings. Unfortunately, | tend to partake of the grain more often than the grape, so:| can't recommend any one with authority, but some of the best wine in the world comes from Napa, so | don't suppose you'd be risking anything by choosing one at random. Don't worry about appearing like an art fag or anything because plenty of tough guys drink wine: knights, cowboys, vikings, bums. Fuck, wine rules.

PAVE THE PARK! Gratto Frito 6 @ group of actvsts in San Francisco. They make

‘pamphlets that range in subject matter from Are You Married toa Crack Whore?toHow To Point at Pigeons. Ths one, wih all ts intentional ram. matical errors, 6 called, Now it Time to Pave that Park!GrattoFito pub lcations can be done got by sending a SASE to: Shamrock Towers, 809 Lincoln Way, San Francisco, CA 94122. Now it’s time to pave that Park. Pave Golden Gate Park.

‘Napa, backwards, spells, “Apan.” Stick a J"infront ofit (or behind it) and you're In Japan! Trip out! Napa Jack, a.k.2. Bill Pepper, in the land of the rising hard tip.

Senne RU ROTUo est skate park in the world. it Pi fom Ree a ou ARR Caen oer iii PrN ent ene Me aac Per oe ou Sd Ree me cos Reed SRC RCC au Rete ee eeu Pe eee koe aceon (eee aoe io Teeter eee se that has fresh concrete you can go rip on. AORN nM eco ec Chris Senn. He'll show up in the morning at Pee un

and just blow minds. Blow noses. Have you ec Look, I'm interviewing you, Bill. Have you ever been to a petting zoo and petted a ee aed ier ON un CU Pub ci ence a vet ee oy re ecco Pte UM eC Ua as eR Rien cs Ce Ri Pere cn CEC Red Dee ne) Te —Dave Carnie

‘Why pave the park? called“paris 3 square miles of dit ight thesoly 4.jts thy, Basical in the heart ot San Francisco. As a tourist Mecca, we need fo Keep our home ONE NEAT CITY 2. Parking spaces are hard to find, but if we use our resoures, instead cof abusing them for Yun" and “games, everyone in town could have their ‘on garking spot. No problem. And with a simple bus system like Super Shute, everyone could get other spaces cheaply and easily 8, Al the plants in the park take our CO2 and waste itn a satsh process called photosynthesis. Then they dump thelr exhaust (oxygen) tack into ouratmosphere. Oxygen isa highly flammable and dangerous compound. explodes. Thats why no one fs allowed to smoke in an oxy gen tark at the hospital Do you want you children inhaling volte gass287 OF course not 3a. Is there a danger ofthe park exploding because of al the oxygen and taking the Suncet dst withi? Absolutely |knowthatyoute think Buttisnt ing," he park explodes, weil just use the ocean toputtout” that simple. Even if everybody in San Francisco carried one bucket of sea-waler to exinguish the park it would stil take hours and hours of labor. 4 Lil Kids are alway’ faling out of trees and breaking they tiny arms. 5. Pets get lost in the underbrush. How many imes has you Sunday been ruined bythe Joss of a dog, ofish or cat. Think of ll the hours you Waste Searching the covering the cy wih those damn “Lost Pet signs Tose signs are made ol paper, a crucial natural resource Ifwe chopped down all the trees inthe park, there would be more paper and less rea on touse it (no mare lost pet signs). We, thepeople,win twice! 6 Its chock-full of dead bodies We all know someone who has pan icked and kiled a prostiuie and then buried hinvher in the park Without an easly acissible (and ilegal) dumping ground for corpses, perhaps these monsterswould think twice. 7. the park were paved, we would let all ferent groups paint murals ‘omitsoitwasprety. ASongastheycid intrterewithwihthewhite stripes to separate the parking spaces, atsts everywhere would have reason torejoice!Theacrylic brand paint industry would instant flourish, lf people relly must lay their litle games, why not go to@ gumnasium toplay. Sneakers makea great squeaking sound on the highly pol d andincaseol a bloodynose,thereisusualya ishedhart-Woolors, py phone near by wouldbeeasytochangethenameon themapsandsignsallover 9 It ‘with just letters. The letters are “G"*'-N" naj al oficial mentions of theGoldenGateParkwouldbecome"GoldenGateParking”Simpel 40. Wecouldleavebutalointhelot,andityouaveoverone,thatsa freehalfhourofparking! Plsfreemeatsteaks. What can !do to help? ‘Nowyouarethinking,“Al righ,already,'m convincedand|want10 help. ButyoufoksalGratitoFritoseemsoorganizedanddriventhat there'snotingletfo da”But youarewrong!Justbecausethisissucha (ogi, people-trienaly idea, there is sil plenty o be done. Start Paving| Paveyouownitepatch,thanpaintyounameonitfortheworldfosee! Bur| veinadiferentty?Whataboutme?”Youask.Youmusthavea hometown.NoPark?Whatabouta pond inyouign park. Stana campa ‘ofa"Gredia"Lake?RememberthisisgoodforallAmerica,

1f |_____would be much happier ilthere wasno goddamn park whalso-ever, and hate oler-