The Beggar 0839211546, 9780839211549

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THE BEGGAR F. M. ESFANDIARY

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THE BEGGAR F. M. ESFAN DIARY On the \Urfacc, thia is the story of 11 crippled beggar in an An b village who iib on hill doOy in a busy street of his vil bg c begging for alms. Guill. ncod, ~ontcmpt an d fear impel the village~ 10 gh•c him money: und perhaps thCiC very things im.pcl them 10 their 6oaJ a tlOCll be at ~ace-and your unclct anJ ochct people 1n the villa,c had to carry you ~here until yc,u were a arown ""'" m.adc yourself a dolly. Now you're angry 01 everyone. Why an )'OU this way. Ali? What would you dooe 1f we 't helped you? You don't want lo lllldn1land that when )'OU were link your 1cp wcrc weak and we to carry you all the time bcca-you .:ouldnl wal•.• Soll 1.-crting his qcs from bi1 IIIOthcr. Ille llquid. "All childun hive wen kp. thal'a lhc a,....,,.ary doctor Mid. He MINI thal If )'OU had kl me •al• and UIC my lcp. they'd hive become $Iron,. Even one or two people here ,n the vtllaae have uid lhc oamc thins. l1'1 bcca11111 yc,u didn·1 let me .iand up and walk thlt my lcp withered awa1 ha"' bec:omc bke this. You should•.., let me uae my Jc--. By God. you si-ld've let me wait ...• "Whit's 1he matter wi1h you. Ali? I tell Yo11 we coulJn'I let you walk. Why donl you ••nl lo undcotand? Two. three times you tried to wait but each lime you fell down. Donl you understand. Ali. we had 10 carry you." She ........ II her liOft •• he Pl with bo-..ed 48

head. ailcnt, di-.'OIIMJlate, his lcp re11U1J limply on lhc chair. She went to him •rNI put hct hand on his hack, "Ona'! wony, my 111ft, God ia a,m. puaionate. He oea everythins. Who .,., we to quntioa his judJIIICnl? This is the fate He's chowen for you and there'• nothing you or I or anyone de cu do 10 chan,c 11. Be 1ratdw 10 Him. He11 reward )'(Ml for all Yl>W' 1uffcrin1.• Cam11n1 hi• lhoulder Ille aJJcd, "I've helped you and ,.atcbed ewer you all tb'· Sitli, hc'U set well." The llcl· pr palllcd, and k>okin1 away, added, •1 1111111 abo aal Hil mercy ror the Widow'• dauJhter.• , - , e d . Well.

"Whaf• the matter with her ilaugh1err "Her life loO ia In clan,er. The Widow dreamt dial her daup,ter had died. God forbid. God forbid."

"1bil ia her punishment for th< way sbe'1 been livift1 since her hUlbencl-may he ru1 in peace

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"Don't speak this way, Sitt Mary-, ii i1 ain• l'ul Doa'I lcqct dial you ba"" a aiclt child and 1-1 God's help. You muat be pure." "You're ri,tlt, Ali. But I didn't 1:ay anythin1 llinful. I juat fed dial if Ille Widow wants mm:y for her dau1h1er, she muat chan,c her way of life.•

"The Widow ia I decent wuman." Ille llcpar replied aravely. "She's without huaband. Thia isn't cuy ro, a w0111an with I child.· "May God protc-=t her ~hikl," Sill Miir)'IIIII ..W, and 1ootin1 up into th< &11:y, added. "May God ptotecl all childml." "The Widow bu made a w:,w to &ive live lira to Ille poor.· "She's poor herself. " - CID help otbcn?" "She's uked me to act her the inooq,. But I'm only a hcggar and I can't help. But whon-er helps .53

IIICb a -.ly mother ..-ill bc bclpod bJ Ood." TIie Bqsar pauoed, tw,plna Sin Maryaa would ...iunicer cbc - , , .

Bui Sin Maryam did - reply, ud made as if I(> leave. ""Sill Maryam, perhapo )'OU WUI ID profit fl'OIII lhil opportunily and help a -.ty IIIOChet? She', already lo8I four cbildrca and ..,., there It lhe dan.., ahc may looe bet only rauinlfti child." "Wllal arc you uyina, Ali~ When . . I .,;n, IO find live Un• I Qft'I help uyocw, We're pi.w ounei-. bow "" ..., bdp ot11enr "Your h ~ ' • llalJ;,, daiDa well,,- can pc the money, hn'1 6ve lira "'Ortll peyins IO uve your child?"' "Don"I NI)' tU) nodded •nd tumcd to go. The Beggar called him back. -Can )'OU rClllffllber what I told you 10 tell her

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•you told me IO 1ell Sitt Sara 10 f«SCI about her . _ becauie there'• no money." '"Tb.at'• risJ,L Tell her, Ali said he c.111•1 Id you die money.• Wa~,11111w boy hurriedly cmN 11w 1uut, the Beggar atm..i called him back aaain. IO pvc him 1 different m-se-• more bopdul m ~ ror her. But he let the boy ao, Don't be afraid. Sara, be thou&ht. 111 brin1 you the money !Oday. 111 nol lei you )'Ollt - · He 1laftd al ha• lop and aadiy lhook Ilia bud. Lep. he said t,jlcndy, why are you 10 ugly? Look 11 JOii· You're dcformccl and weak and small. WIiy did they do thia 10 you1 Why c111ft I IIAnd up OIi my rec1 and walk and run1 WIiy mlill I be """1 and like th11? I'm the lire of a smaU boy. I'm not nen u tall u thi1 Mohlllftlld. Whal have I •.. Hearina 1ppru111:h, he autumatic:ally raited hi1 tin cup. "God give you. May you never ao h1111111." He looked up. and -ins Sitt Mar• yam, lowetcJ hi• arm and set hi1 bellin1 cup on the ground aaarn. "God prot«t your cluldren. Sill Muylllft. how'1 your b pakctiwdy and - pcred, "Don't wony, Ust, One, DOdliDJ will • pn." "Wllat did you Ayr '1 .aill IIOCbiaJ will happen. Sbe'IJ fullill blr

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IOIIIOl'TOW."

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"II be Ill impu,tant becaa. . . WNldn'I neD opead • litllc ol tbc IIIOIIC)' . . . . . . IOdayto buy as-'Nll& toe&L I willl I bad -'NII& lo al - • l'ID IO llllnpy." Rdaliag ha', die Beau mt. "Liolm. UIIY One. fl) bollle 111d ICII your -cller IIOt to worry abou1 die - , , . I'll 11> rlabt away and Fl II« dlC money and fetch yoa IOllledliDa to al. Hllff)' he,- and be palialt, aad ICll )'OUt IIICllbff ID be palienl. I'll ane u quickly a I

caa."

"But ID)' IIICllbff isn't bamc - • • Ille UsJy One ml. Flli"I up. "She'• ,cine to find the rest ol tbc

- , lor her ._, I'll II) 111d Ila)' al ID)' lllldc'1 apia. Maybe Ibey hawc lllllldbiaa to cat.• "Very wdJ tlica. you ao to yoar Wide aad Fl MIIDClhi111 to cat and 111 lab lhc mancy to San and IVf1lrise bet. Tomonow I'll buy - . _ , . , . .•• Friday-the day afler 101110nOW I'll buy you -11in1 from the a,nfectionay. Go - • God procect ,ou. UsJy One."

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Biting her nails, lhe U1ly One alo,t,ly w,aJbd away. turning brr head ,cven,l tlmca lO loot at the Bonar, and to wave lO him. Watcbin1 brr, lhe &sa;ar llhoolr. hit head and ailoently said. God protect you. Ugly One. Mustafa Hauan cloted his 1bop and went home. The owner ol the provi.ion i!On, a tall balry man wirb a h1nJlrb11r m,uuche, croaoed the meet and 1111uanin1 by 1he w,all, 001 far trom the &11ar. prrformcd hlll ablulions, wuh.in1 bis head lllld hand, •nd fret and IHual pans. He 1hen MDI back. lfll'ud a small, 1attrted ru1 In froat at lib shop and bqan b11 all.ihrnk:, rvrnin1 prayrn. The Beggar trandem:d the two coins from the 1u, cup to hi• pockcL Al he was about IO aoa lhe .ircct, he uw .-.hmad. the WOlkuttrr, .iridin1 bfilkly, holdins • kins-handled spade on bis •houldcr. The Beggar .ioppcd and let him pea. Erect, robu,t. proud. 1he Woodcuncr walked in the "nlrr or lhc S1rect, and DOI once turned his IO look lhb WI)' or that. Arrosant youni fool, •he Beggar 1hought, watching him •·•lk away. Looll at him; he walkl u if he were the Kina of all the Arab&. Somebody >hould 10 and tell him how ridiculous and puny he loou when he', drunk. I &hould ao up to him myself and ""Y• loot. Ahmad, I have no ill feelin.. for you, you're like a brolher to me, but whom do you think you fool v.ith lhi.. am,gan"? I don"t 78

want to hurt you and 1Jffcnd you but you walk u if yw'd never been drunk. You lhould aec yourself when you're drunk. 11111 the Olher day I w,w you mw,in1 toward the hill and )'tlll looked dis..,.ain1. He spat hard. muttering. Your father be cuncd, Ahmad. why don't yw p, away lrom here.

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7 Dljlaled. pnocclljlied wtdl ...,, dellimcia. . . . . . . . . . llowly. rapidly. . _ llowly . . . . . . . . . . . _ _ , IOWard tfoain°1

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II . . bluly, boupl ,omc

oala and uud die butt IO

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-T -- -all olMicl, HoeNia, die cobbler. I - •M.,• HalNia ormiaa IIIIO die -

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Shdiadeh this afternoon. Bui il'1 IIOI --,, Ali. it's noc easy. Phll Ura ii a .loc of - , , . God only knows - could - lw lira Ollf· . , . _ witll

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1elw.. We're poor 100. But my wife 11ayi we mu1t11'1 be unsratdul She"s rlshl. Our boy ha Wlf'P"d quivering. M1ybe ooon he'll ICCO¥er. What ii it they ..y. a home without cluldrcn ii like • CICllltlery.•

Tbc: &uar nodded mechanically, lhen, mating his eyebrows m«l. S&ld, "What did Shebadcb

s.ay?"

llc-n 1uok """" nail• our of hb puck.et, pul them in his mouth and mumbled, "He .aid M li111'1 a lot of money. All. Ht .aid bis""" is goinc 10 be c,rcumcillCd this evc,nln,-Friday cw,-aed ht .s._,.,.., ha.., _ , - ICl •"- away. I lold h1m ..• "His home be dosuo,ed." "I told him. I uid. l~n. you're Mt throwins tills money away; this ~ ) for a YOW, I don'1 ••n• h for my>Clf; I said, I -n• 10 sivc ii lo lhc Beggar ...• "Why diJ you ttaNI, Mr. Slu:hadch. this money·• -red, il's for tbt poor. I said. th< \\"tdnw bu beQCd All to &el her the monns. Some said that the Widow and lhe Woudculler ~ sinncn and lhcrcfore God had punished them. Othcn blamed the \\'idow for lwin1 the youn1. inncA'Cnl Woodcullcr Into her proftigate ways that bad led to the uagcdy. Still others spoke disapprovingly of the WO()dcuuer's frequent drunlceilnw, and

commiserated wi1h the Widow u ylng lhat she was 116

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a poor, hlll'lel)' woman, a fiercely de¥olcd mocbcr who maU) had died while U')'in1 to proccet the

life of her only c:hlld. But although there we~ lbae cliffercnca of opinion, the people were unanimous in their uae, at AU the Bega,. They •~ furiously u lhey 11poke of his cruelly, n:proacbcd Lhc:mxl¥a for havin1 liven him almi, reviled him for aJlowina hlnuclf, OU1 of 8imple jealousy, to IIUlrder a mother and betelvc a ("&IDJJy of ill son. Tbc1 aU agreed that the Beggar daerw:d the ltrictat puniitunenL Se,ei aJ at the Woodcuuer'1 relatives went to the pritoo bulldin1 where the Bcuar wu bcina held. They tried to break into bis cdl, but the

vil}qe't four policemen, after IOIDO 11,upk and eitdlanp o( blows, mana,cd to drive them out. They gathered lo the ltttcl. outside the prilOII~ weeping. moaning. shourin1 i115Ults. threatc11in1 to IJLke ma11en1 inso their own bands if the Juqe did no« act qukkly IUld justly. The prison was a stone building-tbt only scone building in the villas~- On OD8 side wu 1he cou.rt,oom and a ~ office, and on the ~ were thrtt prison cells. M051 of the lime tbele a:lbi were einp1y. The &gar meed on the floor of bis a:U, ,u~ bina his 11e11ueJy bruiicd lep, and O\'Cl' and llffr vihi~perin1, Sara. Sara.

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When the boy in the adjoinina cell woke up, Ali Mid, ..M111tafa. what arc you doin& bcre'r' ..I juat dreamt the Barber cut off my bead... "'What?"

... dreamt he cul off my head." --w11y a~ you here. boyr The boy rubbed bis cycs. and pttJng up. Aid. "'They broupl me here la$t nipL" -1 haven't Kell you on lhe meet in a long lime. Where were you all • time? Whal happened to your donkey?'' ..I WU here all lhis rime'" lhe boy •aid •ncl U he ,went to 11cand at 1he ban 9CPan1in1 the two cella. be added. ""They let me oul ~ days qo. .,.., lbeir fathers be c ~ they brought me back. here lu• nisht.'" The Benar hobbled over to the ban and whispered, •What were you doing here thi11 1uncr "'They brou3h1 me- here about t•-o months

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•ID • .... -vn. I didn't

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you for • Iona time, Why did

brina you here? I be.rd lhl . . ." ""Tbcir home be dalroycd, they've kept me here all thia time. I didn't do anylhin1, One niat,t my father aaid to me. he said. look. Mustafa. loday you didn't sell anything and we don't have money to bu.y bread or anythint to cal. Your wife and your child art hunary. 11·1 not right thal Ibrahim Hauan and Shehadch and aJI the othcn have w, they

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m11ch. iand -.-c don't h:ivc any1hinJ. 811t God look1 '1flcl' a poor peddler Uke )'OU, 10 lo Che •••" "Sara. Sara."

w\Vhac?• -So • ·b11 h.ippcnedr ..So nothing. liO he 11aid, go lo the pro¥bion 11ore and Ate if you can set us IOffletbing to caL" ..So what did you do?" ·So I went to the store, I went lhroup 1be bac:t and broke in the way my athcr told me. and I went in and. ya Salam, there wu IO much food, wherever you looked 1hcre wu food and I wu hungry and I began lo cal and I ate cverytbia1 I could find, 1 ate o liYet and buattr and c111--umben and d,ceiie and lertucc and ..... ..AJJ rigbL all righL" Laughing joyfully be. said. "I ate. everything. 8)' God, I waa ,o hunary I ate nerythinJ. I bqu 10 lie down • nd ~lit • llnle, bu, thi~ voice .aid, he .,.Jd, ah.ame on you. Mustafa. you have a wife and i:bild and an invalid falhcr and they're all hllogry and waitins for you. I ,01 up quickly and sluffcd rny pockets with ve1c1ables and chased 50ffle chidtens, but you know how these dllmned c-h1cken1 arc ..,·hen you want to catch them, they bcsan to crow and cackle and make IUCh a thal people came runnina over and they cauaht

rusa

me and broughc me here.'' "11icir home be dc.stro)•cd... 120

.., told ahem, I said, by the lire of my dilld. I'm nut a thief, i1'1 jua1 1h111 today we didn'I have any• lhin1 to eat. let me take lhl, (ood lo my family and 111 never steal again." "So what did they 111y'!"' "They uid that 6:m I bad lo be punished 10 I wguld never do lhiA aaajn. They loot away my donkey and my men:h.andisc and kept me here for two montha.,. ·'(iod puni$b 1hem ... "\\'hen I wcnJ home two daya qo. my invalid fa11N!r and my ~,ife and child were all 11anin1 and I had no donkey and no mcn:h11mdi11e to go around peddling and no one wouJd tnl5t me and l•"e me men:handisc to sell. So las, nip1 when lhc whole world was at lhe Widow•s pl4ce . . ...

"'Sara, ya Sara... ..... I iwent 10 the provi.-won 11urc and I ate all lhc food as quickly u I couJd •"'·allow, and I put a lot of food In my pockets, bul they caught me asain and brought me here and nuw I • , .•• urim, the policeman, came in with some bread and falafel. and the Regar 1oot ou1 the five lira he had in his poi;ket from the previoWi day. and ~id. •·Karim, God protect your children, here'• five lira .•.'" ln!ltan1ly Karim drew b;ack and 11aid, ..Are you tr')·ing to bribe me?"

..rm not trying ro ..... 121

..Five lira'• a lot of money;· tbr policcmaa in1erposed. ararina at the money... What ii it you 'llr&nl me to do l« you? l can't promhc uytbina, 1 can Oflly try... '"Look. Karim, I don't want you IO do anytllia, for me. Tbii; money'• not mine. I Sol it. for the Widow-may Ille mt in peace. She'd made a ..,_ to Jive this money IO the poor today. But today no one's poorer lhan her own daupccr poor girl, poor girl. Tate tJus moocy lo her, dic'1 at her uncle's hou9e.,. Karim stared•• lhe Bega, for a moment. then quietly Mid. "Somebody found another me lira at lbc Widow's hilt this morning and ewrybody a1reed that h tJ,ould 10 lo lhe Us)y One... The Begpr ihook bil bead U he DHlllered. "'This mikes ten lirL Ood, Sara wu DCYCr to rich when lhe WU alive. She couldw lived COffl• fonably on this for ,eve,.I monlbl." Karim took 1.hc money and the Beaar said. ''l alm05I fo,,ot to a1k you to take a few piutera from lhil money to Jive to my modler. She'• an old woman. and now cha~ rm here. ,be ba6 no one to buy food for her." He thougbc a momcnl then added, ..Aho give I few piucera to Mustafa'•

father and •ife.,.

Karim was lcavins the c.eU. the Beaar said, "K11.r:im, don't forge1 , thls money's wred you know what l mean." As

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The policeman nodded and left lhe cell. Before Iona the Begar called ror help. Mahmoud Mous.u went to hi.1 cell and asked what be wanted. .., want 10 wash upt tlJe Beggar replied. ..You can wail 1ill this a11ernoon." "But I alto have IO go to the oulbousc.." "'Tbcre·s no outhouae here. The toilet is inside lhe buildins-'" "I don•1 care where it is. I h&ve to IO," ''Can't )'OU wait a Uttler

..I've been holdina it long fflOUgh. l can't wait any longer."' "Thi1 is a mi1erable way to spend Friday;· the pohcanan grumbled. "lf it "'Cf'Cn'&for you, I and thac poliCffllCn •c ,rould all be 'lll1lb our filmilia

now.•· ..You don"t have to •lay here wilh me. Mouasa.. Jmt lock the door of this cc:11 and go home.·•

1uard you carefully. We were even ordered lo have you handc:uffcd. "\\'e hlavc &lrict orders

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but we can't find the handcutfL"

..Do u you wanl, Mo~. But I can' t hold it any longer. I mt.Ill go.• "\\rail, let me 10 and call one of the others... He wcn1 away bu1 was aoon back wilh another policeman. The two men lifted the Beggar and carried him in their arm11 to the toilet. They helped him as be did his business then carried him again 123

in their anus.. They took h.im to an adjoining room •here he walhed his head and hand& and JCXual pana. 11,cia they carried him back to hil ccU. ·wun·1 I hclplca enough ou1aidc that they bad to brin1 me hc,er the Beggar murmured. · Look. if you have any complainq, ,peat with the Judac," t-lA!unoud Mouaa Yid. "But why won't they let me ba\lc I.be dolly here?"' ., told you Wt if )'OU hl\lC any CIOIDPlainlS. you should speu wilb tbe Jud,e and the otherl. They1l see you this afternoon.'"

12 Early in the afternoon. Karim, Mahmoud Moussa and anorher policeman came inlo the 8c&·

1ar'1 cell. Karim A.id. "'1'bc J~ge and lbe 01her1 arc all in lhe coumoom. Herc arc ,omc clean c)othes, put them on and wc'll 11kc you ln:• The BcggaT took the clotha and as he citamincd them, aaid, ..lbne arc aood. clean clothes. Thant you. than.k you. I've needed s~b clothes for a long time. rve been in lbesc rags for months." "Bui you can' I teep these clolhe$." Karim .aid. "You c:an only wear them now so you look neat when you're in the courtroom with the Judge and the others. \\'e mmt take them ba..:k when you return from the courtroom." The Begsar c;onlinued admiring the new clothct. 124

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"Loot. don't wute time. Ali." M,b,,.,..vl M01111a &aid severely, "'They're w•1tin1. Cban,e your cloche&.• The Bc:ggar took off hlil old. dirty clothes aad put on the new one1. The three policr,mea lifted him from the srouad and carried him in their •~ They clll'ricd bim acrou lbt ball, into lbe COOlbOOID. They began to pot him OD lhe floor in front ot 1he Jud,e, but one of the Villap Falben asked rhal he be placed on a table m neryone could -,e tum •hen be talked. The courtroom 'WU filled Mm people. They Al in a " • circle, oa chairs, on bard benches .net some ial on 1bc floor. The Jlldp and three Villqe f•thers sat together on one bench. Other ddcn or the village whotle words abo carried weight sat with members ol lbcir dam in different pa,u or the cou11room. Moai of the ptoplo were dm.ed in black. The Woodcutter', father, brocher and uncles u wcO as the Widow'1 male eou1ins were also praenL The)• all Mt ao,ether. IObbiq, .-.bunpering, hugina and consolin1 one another. Behind them aomcone m:it.ed prayera., Oca1ionally oae of the Woodcutter's uncles inlemapted the to WXJUl iasuJr. and dm:alcn rcvcqc. One or the policemen sat by the door. lbc other thRc, after eenlnt lhc Bcga.r on die t.able acer the Joo,e's bench. stood or u1 in cliffettnt paru

pr•~•

of the room. In the street outside 1be courtroolll. man)' people had 1atheml and IC'aal times one of lhe poticanco had to ao out and Mk them to keep quiet or le.aw. But they maalncd oullide the couruoom, convmin1 excitedly as they naited the verdiet.

Tbe Beaar looked arouad the room, and .,.. ln1 lbe many familiar faces, fell ashamed ud quietly bowed bis bead. Then ii OQ:um,d to him lhat he had not done any wron1 and lherdore did DOC need to be •abamcd, Slowly be raised his bead and looked out of ~ window. He fell painfully alone knowins dial all lhete people wbo bad known him and helped him for years w,erc now suddenly ■f&in1t him. Unable to lhat~otr this fedins of loneliness he bepn lO talk 10 hillllelf, c:ona,lc himselt Don'1 be ubamed. Ali, he beard bimlClf ,ay. Don"t be uhamed, don't be afraid. You~ QOmm.itlCd no wron1, They abould be ubamed of thmucha, aot you. What do they want of you. you're only • cripple. Isn't it enou,b tbal you'\le lost Sara? Whal do they-San. San -w.hat do lhry . • . The Judae, a Jean man with a hooked nose. sat up on the bench. cleared hia throat and u.ld. '"Ali, wby did you do it7 Didn't you atop to Ulint of lbc aorrow you'd bring these people? These arc the people who've helped )'OU all your life, why were JOU un,r1tefulr

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The Beggar S1n.1ggled to 1&1&. 1ttua)cd to II)' a few wo,ds in his °"'·n dcferuae.. but be stammered

him 10 Dama~u, and neither the Baker nor anyone chc from here b.u been able to Jel to him.,.

and .tuucrcd. and w;aa MC able 10 make biauelf understood. The JudF said. '1'alk. Ali. tell UI why you did ir." ..1'11 teU you why he did it," Abdallah YUAlef, one of the Woodcutter'• uncla~ &housed. ''He did ii bccallie he WU jealous. 'lllat'a all lhc:R't to it. he wM ,ealous. Hit falher be cursed, he was julou&. he wu JU}oua •..•· Seyd Saleh. s itting nclll to the Judge. intmvp1Cd lhe 1houts and in a qwet voice said. "Abdallah Yu1111Cf, we know lbat )'O\l're all ,rief-wicken by lhia terrible tragedy. it i1 ud to loee • young and healthy aon--may God be 1ood to him now. But let's all 1ry 10 eompuae 01.u"telYn whiJ. we're here and lake ~ of him qukkly and quietly, I don't have 10 tell you lha.t if the government authorities hear or ahi,, or if 'IA.'e SWi fiptina and arauina, they'll come and take him away 10 1he Chy and he'll be beyond our reach." ..Hc1J never be beyond my reacb... Abdallah Yu111d shouted. "They can take him wherever they want. but by my feather's life.. I'll find him anJ sake. re\'en,e." "Brother," the Judge Yid. ..lhis ii what Fouad the Baker uid when what'►his-narne CXJmmitted a wn wilh his ai111er a few monlba ago. But u we all know 1~ I\M'mmcnl authorities ■uddenly took

..111 Jct kl him.,. dx Woodcuttcr•s uncle

shouccd ...By GoJ. 111 find thia Bc11ar. this murdcttr." "Look, ~ •, not start to fi1ht here," the Judge Yid. fingering bi1 bad1. "Try lo gpuk. quietly." "How can I speak quietly when my nephrw was murdered lut nipt? There'• nolhina 10 aalk :ahoua. Either you take him out right now and bang him or •-e11 lake matters into our own hands. " 'c11 do the 11ame u be did to our boy. We'll tc~h him •hal it i• to murder people, Well teach him whal ii is rob olJ penple of 1heir 110n whom Ibey need in thdr oJd age to lean on.H "God protffl his poor parents, llOOICOnc

t,•

H

shouted, .. Yea, God protcc:1 them, God wa1cb o~r them;'

someone el$e retorted.

..,.he Bcg.1fs munkmt 1wo people,~ lhe Judge uid...I can ICC no rcuon why we lihould M merciful. Re ~a5 noc meN.'ifuJ.• Abdil-Hadl, another cider. said, "But first I wanl lo hear wbal he has to say. I.et'& see! what his 11ory i$. and why he did it." Tumin1 to the lkggllf', he said, ..Ali. why don't you Wk'! \\'hy don't you

tell us what happened'.'" Again the Beggar tried to litlk but the words WOU:ld not come ouL Long strcam.11 of sweat ran

12S

129

I

I

Ju"'" his face and be did

hl1 best to talk, to make

himself undcn1oud. 11 Gud has made ltlm mule,.. one of the Widow's co~iM shouted. ''God punisba. slnncn. He's ju.,t, l ie ~ CYCf)'thing:." -wail. lel him talk... Abdil-Hadi wd. Everyone rc:rruiiMd quiet n the Beaar 11ru,g_lod •Jain 10 talk. He wiped b.i!I face with his s~es and shifu:d hia limp leg,. fnuua• he a1ghcd h.eavlly 11nd wi ved h~ hancb aimies.11)' in lhe air.

..\\'hat's. rhc matter wirh you," the Judge su1, "Why doo't you ._itr Sluwly ltnd almosc in•udlbl)', lhe Beau managed to mutter, Ml doo't know wbal to say." N\\'haa did be say?"' !IOffleOne asked. ..He wd he , . ."

be e&r1 crawl and creep and not be ICICft." one

al the Woodcuuer·1 uncles shouted. The Judae and Seyd Sak:h whispered lo cacb Olber. lhcn lhc Judge said. "Very well. we11 put )'OIi oa lhc floor. W-.0 IOIDCOOC put him 00 the

loor." Two men. sitting la lbe. front rows ,ut up, carried the Segar and put him on lhc floor.

Abdil-Hadi said. ..Now that you're on lhe floor. wa • ·ant you to talk. we wan& )'OU to lcU u1 what bappencd and • by you did it.,. Tbc Bega, felt lbc pound around him. looked up at lhe people and usfacd wilh relief...h isn't

I

1a1t; • he

1aid lookio1 up al lhc Judge and lhc Olbcr elders. "il'• just thatbow sh&U I say-it's jusa lbat I cati't wt in front of all the1e people. Let me talk 10 one of you tbal

don'l want 10

" Pu( me on the Door." l1le Bcaar auddcnty

ahcn&led. Every body turned and 5ta.red al the Segar. • \\fh>• do you want to be pur on the floorT' Seyd Saleh a$ked. "Ple.ue put me on lhe floor.'"l don"t sec why \li'e should put .. ." ... get dizzy here on the t;tblc. Plcue put me down OIi the ftooit. I'm DOI IK.~ u.stomed to look-

ing at people From 1h11 height. 1·vc: alwa}'I looked up whcn1I i poke with people . .... 1lle terpent wanes to he pu, un the lloor 10

l.30

M he talked. seYCral people in the back rows p,l up lo loot at him. One of the Woodcuua·, 11J1Clcs tprllftl lo hit feel 1houtin1, "Wha1'1 the matter wicb you pcopk,, are we going to 11Jt here all aflemoon waiting for this crinunaJ to decide to .. ... ..I'm not • criminal , . ... .,, . . U)' a few words?" "rm not a c:rimina1.• lhc Begar repeated. wipin1 lull ~ and (ace with his sJccva. ·•rmnot rcspon11iblc for their deaths. On my mo1het'1 life, 131

on m)' religion, I had nothing to do with iL" " \Va.it a minute:• Se)·J Saleh ~id. ..wb.at arc you tryin[t to tell UB here? Arc you tryina to say tha& you're not JUihy, that )'\lU'rc not mpocwblc for their dcath.17" ..Ye$. yes. this is what I'm trying lo way. On my honof l hac.l nothina lo do with iL God only knows, that right now I'm more 11hockcd Ill what bu happened than anyone cl5C in this hall. That woman "''as aond to me. Why would I want lo do away with her'.' She wu the only woman who --she was i!ood to me. l did my belll '"'' ni,Jhl 10 i:avt her, t,y C.od, I did my best.'" "Yuu·~ a liar,"' Abdallah Ymacf shout~ "'you're a li.ar, by God, you're a liar. Everybody kn~s that you were jea.lou!i of my nephew. everybody k_now, that. \Vruat'$ 1bi.i lie about your try-

,n~

sa~e them ,~ , ni3ht'! Do you think we',e a1upid he.re? l>o you think •c·rc blind and don't sec what's going on? Last night )'OU were angry, you \\ere anrry and jealous. Why don't you admit thif! You wttt jealoU5 be~ause Ahmad llnd the \\'idow wcro together and you tried lo act fire to h•

the hut • • .. "1 did not !!Ct fire

10

the hut,. Ood tnowa I did

ru admit I WU ansry and jealous. I dml't deny this. J ~ u jcalc>U3. of rounc l was jealous. \\t'ouldn'I you~ jeitlous if Lhc WDmlUl you wanted were wit" aoothcr man'r'

001.

1~2

I

..Beuar, watch your ton1ue," the Widow', eldest ~01.Wn ihoutcd. .. Don•, try to dJa1y Sua·1 honor. hn'I h enouab that you cawied her death? Sara was a deccnl woman. sbo wu a mother, a

aoocS molhcr-may C'JCld wa1cb over her orphaned daupter.'" '"Ye&. Sara wu a dcccn1 woman." the Segar Nici. "She was • 1ood mother, who says she wasn't? I always admired her and ldcd to help her.

I never hurt her. I was angry and jealous fut night. but I didn't harm anyone. God knows, l"\'C never tried to harm or hurt anyone." "Do you really apect us 10 believe this sto,yT' lbc Judge aaid. ..If you'd not planned to do away with them, why would you be near her hut al that bour? Why v,cren'I you Ill home, uh,ep like every. one ei.c. What "'ttC you doing- on the hill al that hour?'" -rbat'■ right... Abdil♦Hadi rejoined. '"You "-ere ~ before anyone ehe: what were )'OU doina near her hut al 1ha1 Late buur-?'' ..111 teU )'OU what I -..·u doing there. I went thefe in lhc evening to give her chc five lira I bad prombicd lo set her for her ~w. Awad Allah and wbal'a bi1 name. hi& friend, lhc one with the m1111ache. helped me up lhc hill; you can ask them if you wanL Anyway. •• we 'Were gomg up the bill we $AW HamllJDCh and she s.ud. listen. Ali, Ahmad the Woodcutter is •ith her, don't ao there. Wheo 133

f heard I.his I got m-y angf)'-l'U admit it. I sot very &olJY bccau1C. for one lhing. 1 bad lricd to hllrd 10 ,et her the money. Well anyway. I tbou.gbl •bout it a linle and I decided 10 wait in &ht shed till Ahmad Jett. I wailed a long time. and you knnw ha. it i1 up on the bill al nilbt. it 11:111 oukl and I felt sleepy, So I CO\lerat my.elf with some old wks ud weal to atcep. 5,.,mctirnc i.tcr -I rea11y can\ 1ell you bow mu.ch 1.aier-1 woke up cnu1hln1 and .aw .molle oomins inlo the abed. I •~nt 001 and saw &hat the nob wu comin1 from Sara', huL IMtanlly I started IO climb the hill, first on the dolly, but wheo the dofJy kepc rolbn& bad, I goc angry, J duni ii away. and l began to aawl and creep up the hill. But thae damned lcp. these damned lep. T jllll couldn'l 1e1 up lbere. l tried and etniglcd IO pt up there, by Ood 1 tried. I wanted to get co the- but bl:fore 101DC1hing happened 10 her. But thae damned legs. these damneJ lep. I ju111 couldn'1. So I bca&I\ IQ

iaea"' SARA, SARA. SARA .. ,"

"'Easy. Ali. easy,.. Scyd Saleh said. Ouivcring • 'itb eitcitcmcnt and pgundin1 on hit limp legs. the Beq1u went on, "I tciumed aod acreamcc;l. but I C..liildn'&6CC Sara, l cried a1ain IO reach her hu1. I even tried to stand up, but I couldn't. So I began 10 shout for help." The Bqpr pal13Cd 10 catcb hi~ breath and wipe hil w.et face with bJ5 51«\·c.. 'Tilere WM c:w,plete s.lfflc:c In rhc 134

counroom •• ncryonc lialCPCd intently IO his U• ated uneranca. ..How do WC know yuu'n: aol lymg!'• lbe Judge aaicl peaina down a, him. "On my mother'■ life I'm no1 l)•in1. How can I prow co you that rm not lyin11 Kamel and bi■ fncnda hunl me shoutins for help. Ibey could ICII from my body and my ck>lbcs that rd been cra:pi111 on 1hc sround. 'The others 11a.w me too. You c:an Ilk them. you can ask all of them. I don'I know what else I an ICU )'011... ... don't IMl him ♦- Seyd lbrahim, one of the cldcra, Mrvc never trusted these- begaB... Shrua,in1 his ihouklen. the Bcuar uid. "My fatc, is lo your bands. •bat can I 1ay? I've told )'OU cvaydlina. rvc told you Ille uuth. now I leave 111y face in your band5." ..All your life you've left your fate ia other people•, hands.• Seyd Ibrahim said. "'Thia iJ the trouble wilb these beggars. They're all luy. They're all frauds. You cannot tru11t them. They lit Idly all day and iaevitJ&bly thc:cr minds weave all sorts of •~iciom and vile thought■ and tricb lo mare people. \\'bat is it they say- ,a,beo the lf'Ol.'U hat notbins I do he C:hiilJJgCI the weights. 11'1 the wne whb tbc:5c begars. Tbey just doa't want to worlc and 1.ue cue nf themselves. Wasn't it only wt month that they urtsted that begu in Aleppo who had • fortune hidden under bis

••id..

lJS

manrcss. l tclJ )'OU 'A'C can'1 t.rust lbesc began..'" A young milfl in one o( the back row1 l(ll up an,J 11alJ with embanaumenL ").fay I say something'! " The Judge nodded r&nd Seyd Saleh said. '"\\'hat

do yt,u want ro aay, Kamel?" ~, just v.-anl ro say-I mean I don't know anything aboul counroom11 and things like that. but 1 jui t want to 6ay lhi1.. I want to 511}' that last night I d id hear Ali's c.tO ror help. and when I saw him, be'• right. hia doches and body were soiled and be Wll.\ 1rying to crc:cp 10\l,'ard the Wido'A•'• huL.. He pau~ to cah:h hii brea1h and bite hit lipt. DifOdcntly be added. ..May I say something elao? 1 just want to ia_y this. 1 want co say that whl:o he 53w m rUMini up~ hill. he shouted tc> us not 1n Waste time, but to go in and save the \\idow. Salim. and my cousin Halllan and the othera ftl'C v.•ith me rno ud they .• ," " He'• niht," the man next to him said. ... wu there tc'O and J uw C\'erytrun1.., " Maybe this is not my businas,... Kamel went un. -but I jwt wanled 10 tell whal I 1111111." \\'hen Kamel sac down another long silence foOowcd. The people stared perplexedly at one aoochct and uneasily cleared their throats. The J udge. Sc)·d Saleh and the men nclll lo them whi&per~ In o~ ano 1her's ean. nodded. •·bispcred ClJ.am, Al kng_th. lhe Judge &llid, ..ff what you 11a)' 136

iJ tnK"-and I'm nut aayin1 that ifs uue or notbut lef, believe I.bat it's IJUC, Jet's 1ay you didn•t rully try to sd fire 10 the hut, lhis still c1oesn•t pro\'e your in.noccncc. All right. maybe ir's ,rue 1hat you cjidn'1 have anything to do with lbe smoke, but according to your own story. you were in the 1hcd, you saw the smoke and knew that they were in there. but atill you did nothin& about it . .... ··eUI , did .. . ." ..Wait. let me fini"1; I haven't finimed." .. But I did Cl'efYthin1 1 could. l really tried... "You didn'l ti')' hard enou1h," the Judac said. ..Do you mean to tcU me that you couldn'l go the lhor1 diitance bctwttn the shed and her but1 Do you ~kc me for a (0011 \\'hen you lhe unoke and knew I.bat they were in then:, you 1hould've in11uinrly aone there to 11ave CMm. Do you know lhllt if they'd hem rea~hcd just a little aooner. they wouldn't have died? You were lea thao thirty slql from them, but lhey 11ill perished; what doCi this mean r "Ya. there are no two ways about it, t1c•• 1uilty,.. Seyd Sakh said. lhwng Ilia hc,ad. "IL saddens me to knew that Ali. whom we've 1tnown and helped all 1hcse )Uri, would turn out to be Ibis

-.w

way. I helped Ali •hen be was a boy. I carrim him around in my arms and on my shoulders and

later when he gol his dolly t helped by pus.bin& bim to make tllin,s easter. Some people saMI that

137

tberc was nOlhina wrona with bis lcp and that it wam·c flCCIC!l&lry to carry b.im. B11t I did not mind. A ftn' all. bis poor parents carried him ~ and his unclq and other people carried bun. ., 1 thoupr I too would help." "l carried him roo,"' the Judp laid. ..We ID carried bim and bicd to help." "Yea, .-c've all helped him," Seyd Salelt caatlnued. ·No one can deny Iha, tbt people of our village have bml good to him and helped him. Now lhat lfOWD•llP man. if be WOii IO Uc down aU day and bea, dlat'1 hii ~ l1'1 his race. nobody can do anything ■bout it. But I say lhat ,when be saw that IIIIIOU and knew that

11c·, •

tbere were people in the.re be shoulcfve done tomething a ~ , lt. he should'vc gone tbcrc and saved chcir lives." ·He's lazy.'' Sc-yd Ibrahim said acridly. "I tell you he'1 lazy and imspon11ible, Thae began are all the .ame. They don't Want to do anything, they don't want to IILllkc an effort. I've be.lped Ali IOO. you all know that, and it hum me to see &bat one of our own IOnS ha8 turned ouc llm His larina, i• rapon11ible for the deaths ot two iruM> cent people. ~ •• oodoubc about it, and I say that he muse pay for this. be desenes 10 be punbbed.• "'Ot counc. be delef'Yes to be punilbed,• the Judge lald. "Of course, he mil.SI pay for this. But

••Y·

we can't just leave him

131

in priaon. If WIS leave him

the,e ,wil have IO pay die policanen to pant him all lbc time. And besiclea lbey'll hawe to do ~ ins for him~ 11e11 jmt ■it back there doina e,en lea than he does now and cacb time he needs to move lhey11 haw: to c:uey bun like a child," Sc)'d ]brabjm Jl'l¥Cly said, .,Over Ibo bolda", they c:ut off I.be bands of tblcva and othcn. Why c:an't we do the wne witb him?" '"Ya. cul o! ha bands... a youns man~ to 11im shouted. ..But if " eut off his handl." Abdil.ffldi a.id. "woa•t that mab bim cw:a more hdpJcur '"No it won't,• the Judp aid. '"h will 1cacb him DCVft' again to be lazy. ll fiiU show him lhat bo IIIIISI never a1ain ~ idle and helplca.. apc:ctally like last ni,tlt when then: wu an cmerpnq... ..V~ well then. lcf1 cut off hia haoda.• one of die rQen in the back rows uid. The people nodded lhcir approval and the one or two ob.;ec:uon1 were quickly dianivcd Pullins himselr up on hit hatldl, the Beqar hobbled clOl!Cf IO the Judge's bcn«;b and uid. '"Please don't let

them cut oil my bands. rm not resporwl>lc for their deaths. J tried to save them; by God, I tried.• "'You didn"t uy b■rd cnoush,"' l'.hc: Judge u.id. '"If you'd really tried Ahmad and Sara wouldn't be dtad now." '"81.lC i1'1 not my fault if my legs wouldn't bold me. God knows ifs not my fault; by God, it'I not my fault."

139

..Look. AJ1,•· Seyd Saleh said, "the people have made their decision. Ifs a just Jcd.sion. De thank• ful that a wone fate isn't awaibn1 )'OU." ..But whal', Wt>nc than thi,~ I haw no lcg11, and now you want 10 take away my bands. Wbat'U I do without my hand.a? l"ve AlD old mother lO support. plea~ don'I Jct them cut off my hands.'" Abdallllh Yuatd goc up and said, '1f you have an old molhc:r to support. Ahmad had two okl people ro 111ppon. and the \Vidow bad a daughter to support. Who'll rake care of them now? Look , Ail, go and tbuk God that thcsc people haYC been lenient with you. In any other place they would've really lh(Wt'n you the mcanint of juslice.'" The people, ~ulkn and tcnae, Jot up and began lo tall excitedly among them!IClllt!•. The Begar continued to ad; lot mercy bur hill plcB were drowned out by 1hc agitated voice. ot the people. He heJan to ~•wl and creep after Scyd Saldi and con1inuc his supplications. but th.rec ol the policemen c ame OYCt and lifted him in 1hcir arm1. Ai\ they carried him ®I of the courtroom, ht scRamcd •• the top t1( h~ lungs. begging and

pleadina. &rty in the morninJ 1hey cut nfr the Begar•• b.m&. He bled heavily and lost eonsclou1nc11. The stum~ at hia wrisu were dn:55Cd tighdy with towels a nd rap. buc several tuna during the day Abdil-Azii.. Che barber, had to come IQ lhe cell 140

to administer to him. The ne,.t day, moanins with pain, the Beggar regained consciousness. Mahmoud ~fuu11a, the policeman. brought him t11ud and chccsc, but the Bqgar turned his bead away• • Ali, try to cat somcthin& eo you can reaain your acrcngtb and •• ~I In the afternoon, when Mouua came back. Ille Beggar wu hunll'Y. Mahmoud Mou.sa cut rhe bread ind cheese into small piec:ca and put them one by one into the Bqaar'a mouth. Later in the afternoon, three of lhe policemen cattfully c.-ncd him out of the prilon and aet him on the street. One of them laid. •AJi, the Judac said that you may ao home. You arc • f.ree IIUlD now.•

•aain...