Real Knockouts: The Physical Feminism of Women's Self-Defense 9780814763186

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Real Knockout s

Real Knockout s The Physical Feminism of Women's Self-Defense Martha McCaughe y

NEW Y O R K U N I V E R S I T Y PRES S New York and London

NEW YOR K UNIVERSIT Y PRES S New Yor k an d Londo n © 199 7 by New Yor k Universit y All rights reserved Library o f Congress Cataloging-in-Publicatio n Dat a McCaughey, Martha , 1966 Real knockout s : the physical feminis m o f women's self-defens e / Martha McCaughey . p. cm . Includes bibliographical reference s (p . ) and index . ISBN 0-8147- 5 512-7 (clot h : acid-free paper ) ISBN 0-8147-5577- 1 (pbk . : acid-free paper ) 1. Self-defense fo r women—Socia l aspects . 2. Feminist theory . 3. Women—Crimes against—Prevention . I . Title. GV1111.5.M38 199 7 6i3.6'6'o82—dc2i 97-477 4 CIP New Yor k Universit y Pres s books ar e printed o n acid-fre e paper , and thei r binding materials ar e chose n fo r strengt h an d durability . Manufactured i n th e Unite d State s of America 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3

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Contents

All illustrations appear as a group after page no Acknowledgments vii Preface ix Introduction: T h e Challeng e o f th e Self-Defens e Movemen t i i Ball

s versu s Ovaries : Women's "Virtue " i n

Historical Perspectiv e 1

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2 Gettin g Mean : O n th e Scen e i n Self-Defens e Classe s 5

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3 T h e Fightin g Spirit : Self-Defense A s Counterdiscours e 8

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4 Changin g O u r Mind s abou t O u r Bodies : W h at Ca n

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Feminism Lear n fro m Self-Defense ? Feminist 13

Activism

5 Physica l Feminism : Implication s fo r Feminis t Activism 17 Appendix: Conceivin g th e Kic k o f Self-Defense : Methods o f Investigatio n 21 Notes 233 References 241 Index 25 About the Author 270

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212 2

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Acknowledgments

This projec t owe s muc h t o al l th e wome n wit h who m I share d the exhilaratin g experienc e o f learnin g self-defense , an d t o thos e wh o too k time t o spea k wit h m e abou t thei r understanding s o f self-defense . I a m equally indebte d t o th e instructor s wh o share d thei r tim e an d perspective s i n interviews wit h me . Man y o f the m share d material s wit h me , helpe d m e make contact s wit h othe r peopl e involve d wit h women' s self-defens e train ing, an d eve n rea d a draf t o f thi s book . I a m als o gratefu l t o th e man y peo ple, fro m a variet y o f self-defense-relate d organizations , wh o sen t m e p h o tographs, articles , an d othe r valuabl e information . My gratitud e goe s t o Robi n Lloy d fo r suggestin g tha t I take a self-defens e class. Som e year s befor e that , Walte r Alle n encourage d intellectua l aggressiv ity i n m e an d hi s othe r students , an d Lui s Sfeir-Youni s taugh t th e importanc e of nonviolenc e an d love . Withou t thes e peopl e thi s boo k woul d no t hav e been written . M y thank s g o t o th e friends , famil y members , an d colleagues , too numerou s t o name , wh o clippe d article s fro m newspapers , tol d m e abou t a televisio n sho w o r boo k relate d t o women' s self-defense , o r share d som e information wit h me . Thank s t o Kell y Nugen t an d Trin a Seit z fo r obtainin g data an d othe r material s fo r me . Christin e an d Joh n Watkin s generousl y housed m e whil e I conducte d researc h o n th e Eas t Coast , an d th e Universit y of Californi a a t Sant a Barbar a funde d som e aspect s o f m y research . The followin g peopl e mad e helpfu l intellectua l contribution s a t variou s stages o f my researc h an d writing : Lis a Brush, Laur a Grindstaff , Elisabet h Jor dan, An n Kilkelly , Joh n Mohr , France s Montell , Nik o Pfund , an d Bet h Schneider. Nik o Pfun d an d hi s staf f a t N e w Yor k Universit y Pres s hav e bee n encouraging, diligent , an d witt y throug h eac h phas e o f th e publishin g process. I a m mos t gratefu l t o Aver y Gordon , Nea l King , an d Richar d Widick, wh o mad e extraordinar y contribution s fro m th e formativ e t o th e final stage s o f th e book . Thanks als o g o t o th e man y femal e student s I ha d a t UCS B wh o mad e unsolicited revelations , i n confidence , o f thei r experience s o f sexua l vio -

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lence. Thei r storie s remin d m e o f th e frequenc y an d pai n o f sexua l violenc e and o f th e nee d fo r change . I'v e bee n encourage d b y th e man y student s t o whom I lecture d wh o go t excite d abou t "mea n w o m e n " an d mad e a poin t of tellin g m e so . Finally, thi s wor k owe s a deb t t o al l th e feminis t activist s befor e m e wh o challenged th e notion s tha t wome n shouldn' t spea k i n public , pursu e highe r education, pla y sports , an d wea r blu e jeans—some o f my favorit e unladylik e activities. I t als o owe s muc h t o thos e contemporar y feminist s wh o hav e chal lenged rap e laws , self-defens e laws , an d standard s o f heterosexua l normativ ity, makin g possibl e thi s modes t attemp t t o pus h thos e idea s further .

Preface

This boo k offer s a wa y t o understan d an d experienc e women' s self-defense. A s a participant-observer studyin g an d describing women' s self defense training , I hav e connecte d a n arra y o f happenings , courses , senti ments, an d statement s int o a coheren t "movement. " Real Knockouts, then , like al l ethnography, i s as much a means o f experience a s it i s a record o f it. Armed wit h th e insight s o f feminist scholarship , thi s analysi s o f self-defens e highlights it s potentia l fo r underminin g violenc e agains t wome n an d se x inequality mor e broadly . Of cours e self-defens e canno t b e th e onl y wa y of resisting mal e domina tion, o r even mal e violenc e specifically . Nevertheless , self-defens e ha s important implication s beyon d th e traine d woma n w h o thwart s a n assaul t an d the person wh o trie s t o attac k her . Women' s increasin g involvemen t i n self defense disrupt s th e gende r ideolog y tha t make s men' s violenc e agains t women see m inevitable . Beyon d this , i t prompt s u s to questio n som e o f the assumptions tha t hav e bee n drivin g feminis t theor y an d politics. Rather tha n attemptin g a sweepin g surve y o f self-defens e organization s and thei r participants , Real Knockouts offer s a dee p descriptio n o f women' s self-defense. I t analyze s h o w self-defens e trainin g transform s th e femal e body an d the n assesse s th e impac t tha t self-defens e coul d hav e o n ou r cul ture, includin g th e educationa l efforts , politica l organizing , an d theorizin g of feminists w h o first calle d ou r attention t o sexual violenc e a s a social prob lem. M y hop e i s tha t clarifyin g th e politica l an d philosophica l stake s o f women's self-defens e migh t expan d th e possibilities fo r women's legitimat e use o f aggression agains t men's , a s well a s for ou r negotiatio n o f categorie s with whic h w e understan d an d organiz e ourselve s politically . This boo k doe s no t attemp t t o answe r th e question , "Wha t d o I d o i f someone trie s t o rap e me? " (an issue addresse d i n Paulin e B . Bart an d Patri cia H . O'Brien' s Stopping Rape: Successful Survival Strategies, 1985 , an d i n countless self-defens e manuals) . N o r doe s i t hop e t o provide a n institutiona l history o f women' s self-defens e o r a surve y o f th e man y women' s self -

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defense organization s an d programs. 1 Th e self-defens e program s tha t I describe her e ar e fa r fro m obscure , bu t neithe r ar e the y exhaustiv e o f th e many program s available . Thi s boo k doe s no t provid e statistica l informatio n on th e who , what , where , why , an d whe n o f violenc e agains t women . I t does no t sugges t ho w a woma n shoul d choos e a for m o f self-defens e train ing, discus s al l o f th e ethica l matter s on e mus t conside r whe n trainin g t o defend onesel f from attack , o r provide a history o f women fighter s (se e Hele n Grieco's Demystifying Violence: What Women and Girls Need to Know to Be Safe, 1997). 2 Finally , m y boo k doe s no t recoun t women' s self-defens e victo ries (se e Caigno n an d Groves' s Her Wits about Her: Self-Defense Success Stories, 1987). Anytime on e attempt s t o writ e a grounded , seriou s boo k abou t a wide spread politica l an d cultura l phenomeno n i n a n engage d scholarl y fashion , one face s th e inevitabl e dilemm a o f deciding fo r w h o m on e i s writing. I n thi s particular case , I am writing fo r tw o group s o f people wh o kno w surprisingl y little abou t eac h other , makin g thi s dilemm a al l th e mor e exaggerated . O n the on e hand , self-defens e activists , participants , instructors , an d student s tend no t t o b e immerse d i n feminis t theory , i n whic h thi s boo k is , afte r all , rooted. O n th e othe r hand , feminis t scholar s an d othe r academic s are , i n m y experience, unlikel y t o hav e mor e tha n a fleeting, impressionisti c knowledg e of thos e engage d i n self-defense . Phrase d differently , ho w man y wome n a t the Moder n Languag e Associatio n o r th e annua l sociolog y conventio n kno w how t o shoo t a gu n o r ho w t o kic k someon e i n th e jaw ? An d ho w man y women i n self-defens e course s hav e rea d u p o n thei r Judit h Butler , thei r Catharine MacKinnon , o r thei r Miche l Foucault ? I hop e I wil l no t b e per ceived a s disparaging whe n I say that th e numbe r o f folks wh o trave l i n bot h circles i s statisticall y rathe r marginal . So , wha t t o do ? I n thi s book , I endeavor t o spea k t o bot h group s and , i n doin g so , mus t as k for you r under standing i f at time s yo u wear y o f hard theor y an d year n fo r a n anecdot e o r a personal narrative , or , i f yo u woul d lik e t o se e specifi c theoretica l point s explained mor e intricatel y o r succinctly . Thi s book , then , i s written fo r bot h ordinary educate d reader s intereste d i n women' s empowermen t an d resis tance t o violence , an d scholar s intereste d i n debate s abou t subjectivity , agency, an d embodiment . I f successful , i t wil l sho w ho w th e latte r matter s bear upo n th e former . Feminist philosopher s an d theorist s hav e challenge d centra l thread s o f modern thought . Unfortunately , however , thei r book s hav e appeare d remote fro m th e concern s (an d vernacular) o f everyday women . Self-defens e provides a n excellen t vehicl e throug h whic h t o rende r thos e sometime s

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abstruse idea s comprehensibl e an d relevan t t o th e live d realitie s o f wome n and men . And, by providing som e histor y o f the constructio n o f gender an d sexual violence , an d the social intoleranc e o f women's aggression , I hope t o enable a greater historica l consciousnes s i n th e self-defense community . Some wome n ma y wrongly tak e rap e fo r grante d a s natural mal e preda tion fro m whic h the y mus t lear n t o protec t themselves . Othe r wome n ma y never lear n abou t Wester n culture' s historica l intoleranc e o f female aggres sion an d may assume tha t ou r legal syste m woul d hav e n o objection s t o thei r self-defensive violence . Stil l other s ma y not understan d thei r entitlemen t t o safety an d freedom a s part o f a historically feminis t movement . Just a s young women i n th e Unite d State s toda y tak e fo r grante d thei r right s t o vote , t o make reproductiv e choices , an d to wor k outsid e th e home , the y migh t als o assume a n entitlemen t t o self-protectio n trainin g withou t th e historica l memory o f oppression an d withou t th e determinatio n t o advanc e th e posi tion o f women i n society. Unles s women' s self-defens e trainin g i s situated i n a large r framewor k o f sex inequality, i t coul d en d u p a n individualize d an d less effectiv e forc e fo r socia l change . Self-defensers—a neologis m I employ throughou t th e book t o refer t o the women w h o take o r teach self-defense—ar e inventin g ne w ways t o conduc t their live s an d defin e themselve s a s women . Th e "fightin g spirit " wome n achieve i n self-defens e course s complements , an d sometime s pushe s th e envelope of , othe r effort s centra l t o feminism. Women' s studie s has been try ing t o correc t th e mal e bia s i n scholarship . Tak e Bac k th e Nigh t marche s have bee n a n important ste p i n claimin g women' s righ t t o tak e u p spac e and to hav e freedo m t o mov e aroun d i n th e world . Feminis t artist s an d per formers hav e offere d ne w ways t o represen t v/omen . Self-defens e i s anothe r arena tha t help s wome n questio n th e cultur e the y liv e in—an d th e cultur e that live s i n them . W o m e n ca n chang e society . W e ca n transfor m ou r rela tionship t o tradition . Th e mobilit y wome n achiev e throug h self-defens e complements th e mobilit y an d freedom sough t b y feminis t artists , perform ers, activists , an d philosophers . The emotional , corporeal , cultural , an d political transformation s tha t self defense make s possibl e ca n best b e understoo d throug h th e insight s o f con temporary feminis t theory . A s a practice tha t rescript s th e female body , self defense no t only highlight s women' s abilit y t o redefine th e body, bu t the significance o f corporeal chang e fo r consciousness . Elizabet h Gros z (1994 ) ha s argued tha t feminis m mus t overcom e a traditional dualit y o f mind an d bod y that ha s implicitl y positione d th e bod y a s ahistorica l an d acultural . Gros z named a n importan t agend a fo r feminism : "Corporea l feminism " move s

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away fro m earlie r feminis t approache s tha t eithe r construe d th e bod y a s nat urally sexed o r ignored th e bod y altogether . Corporea l feminis m understand s the bod y a s part o f agency , consciousness , an d reflection—notion s typicall y construed a s solely interio r (Gros z 1994 , viii)—in a way tha t doe s no t reduc e to essentialis m o r biologism . Whil e muc h o f feminist though t ha s focused o n how me n an d wome n com e t o incorporat e sexis t ideologie s int o thei r psy ches, corporea l feminis m insist s o n examinin g th e way s suc h ideologie s become inscribe d an d conteste d a t th e leve l o f the body . Th e "physica l fem inism" o f women' s self-defens e illuminate s precisel y thi s process . Women' s self-defense demonstrate s tha t powe r i s no t simpl y abou t ideolog y (tradi tionally conceive d a s a matter o f ideas, values , o r attitudes ) no r physica l vio lence enacte d o n bodies . Rather , powe r i s disseminated an d resiste d throug h the live d body . I woul d no t argue , though , a s many would , tha t radica l feminist s suc h a s Andrea Dworki n an d Catharin e MacKinno n commi t th e theoretica l si n o f construing th e bod y a s presocia l an d naturall y sexed . Th e accusatio n tha t they clai m me n ar e inherentl y pron e t o rap e an d wome n ar e inherentl y vio lable (e.g. , Gaten s 1996 , 78 , 87-88 ) is , i n m y view , unfai r an d simplistic . While radica l feminist s hav e emphasize d women' s vulnerabilit y t o violenc e (and hav e don e s o for goo d reason) , the y hav e analyzed , no t employed , biol ogism a s a political myt h tha t support s se x inequality. 3 At th e sam e time , however , man y feminist s hav e neglecte d t o conside r seriously women' s self-defens e trainin g a s a means o f subverting th e embod ied etho s o f rape culture . T o b e sure , i t i s the ultimat e goa l o f rape crisi s cen ters t o en d sexua l violenc e altogether . Tak e Bac k th e Nigh t rallie s an d con ferences o n violenc e agains t women migh t offe r a self-defense workshop . Bu t self-defense lack s a political theory , an d theorist s don' t discus s self-defense . This voi d ma y hav e contribute d t o th e misreadin g o f feminist s suc h a s Dworkin an d MacKinno n a s naiv e essentialists . I t migh t als o accoun t fo r Katie Roiphe' s (1993 ) suggestio n tha t Tak e Bac k th e Nigh t marche s an d other aspect s o f th e anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t onl y solidif y women' s identities a s helples s victims . Unlik e Roiphe , I d o no t sugges t tha t wome n can embrac e agenc y an d thereb y wil l themselve s ou t o f victimization—a s though self-defens e offere d wome n th e choic e o f agenc y over victimization. Women's victimizatio n an d agenc y mus t b e understoo d together , sinc e the y operate simultaneousl y i n women' s lives . Offerin g a theor y an d politic s o f women's self-defense , then , nee d no t impl y tha t wome n ca n kick an d screa m their wa y ou t o f systemati c oppression . Tha t said , women' s resistanc e i n it s context o f dominatio n i s a n overlooked , undertheorize d topic .

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The failur e t o emphasiz e an d theoriz e women' s concret e resistanc e t o male dominatio n migh t explai n no t onl y wh y som e feminist s ar e denounce d for positionin g wome n a s naturall y powerles s victims , bu t als o wh y som e feminist philosopher s ge t accused , paradoxically , o f havin g th e ver y o p p o site proble m MacKinno n i s accuse d o f having . Th e wor k o f Judith Butle r (1990) an d othe r feminis t philosopher s wh o emphasiz e th e discursiv e con struction o f se x ha s been , fa r fro m regarde d a s essentialist , admonishe d fo r being immateria l an d ignorin g th e pai n o f violence o n rea l bodies . The y ar e repeatedly asked , i n accusin g tones , "I f everythin g i s text , wha t abou t vio lence an d bodil y injury? " (Butle r 1993 , 28). Butler an d other s hav e provide d rich understanding s o f ho w th e gendere d socia l orde r i s implante d a t th e level o f th e body . Althoug h identifying , fo r instance , ho w an d wh y wome n "throw lik e girls, " as Iris Marion Youn g (1990 ) has , doe s no t mea n tha t suc h bodily disposition s ar e natural , ethicall y desirable , o r unchangeable , thes e theorists hav e no t discusse d ho w w e migh t embod y alternativ e ideologies . I insis t tha t th e idea s o f bot h theorist s suc h a s Dworki n an d MacKinno n and theorist s suc h a s Butler , Grosz , an d Youn g ar e relevan t fo r theorizin g women's self-defense . Thu s i t shoul d no t surpris e reader s t o se e suc h work s integrated i n th e servic e o f elucidatin g women' s contestatio n o f sexe d embodiment. Self-defens e cultur e challenge s feminis m t o elaborat e th e way s women ca n resis t thei r subordinatio n i n a culture tha t demand s specifi c kind s of bodies. I t demand s tha t feminis m tak e seriousl y th e corporealit y an d plea sure o f tha t resistance . I t demand s tha t feminis m ge t physical . This i s wh y feminis m ha s a s muc h t o lear n fro m self-defens e a s self defense ha s t o gai n fro m feminis t analysis . A t th e sam e tim e tha t I mak e a n interpretive interventio n i n self-defens e culture , then , I take a position fro m within th e communit y o f self-defenser s abou t feminism , suggestin g ho w feminism migh t rethin k som e o f it s assumption s tha t groun d a n uneasines s over women' s efficaciou s an d pleasurabl e relatio n t o aggression . Fo r i t was a s an occupan t o f both categories—academi c feminis t an d self-defenser—tha t I came t o thi s conclusion . Th e pleasur e o f moc k comba t mad e i t eas y t o become a fan o f th e wome n w h o tak e an d teac h self-defense , whic h i n tur n made i t difficul t t o dismis s the m a s dupe s o f mal e domination. 4 My participant-observatio n researc h pu t m e throug h a n intens e bodil y experience wher e tw o o f th e mos t importan t theoretica l lesson s hi t me . Before thi s researc h began , I ha d analyzed , i n th e typica l disembodie d acad emic manner , se x discriminatio n an d sexua l violence . Becaus e I ha d identi fied a "masculine " ethi c a s par t o f th e proble m o f ou r rap e culture , I wa s opposed t o an y for m o f violenc e an d firmly agains t guns . Th e powe r an d

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pleasure o f hitting , kicking , screaming , an d shootin g drasticall y altere d m y vision o f feminis t resistance . Second , althoug h I kne w w e neede d t o und o hegemonic mode s o f thinking , a s a self-defense r I starte d living—no t jus t understanding—it differently . Thi s mad e m e realiz e th e relevanc e o f physi cality t o consciousness . En rout e t o thes e theoretica l considerations , Real Knockouts tell s a stor y about somethin g tha t ha s generate d considerabl e controvers y an d abound ing excitement . I wan t t o liv e i n a cultur e wher e i t seem s perfectl y rea sonable fo r a woma n t o sto p a n assaul t aggressively . Th e corollary , o f course, i s tha t i t woul d see m unreasonable , indee d unthinkable , fo r a ma n to assaul t a woman i n th e firs t place , an d w e woul d finall y liv e i n a worl d in whic h th e latter , no t th e former , wa s deeme d th e improper , aggressiv e act. The dange r exist s tha t m y stud y o f th e pleasur e o f moc k comba t take s away fro m th e terro r o f assault , whethe r o r no t on e fight s back . N o one — no matte r ho w wel l armed , physicall y trained , o r emotionall y prepared — wants t o b e confronte d b y someon e wh o attempt s t o d o he r harm . Whil e writing a portio n o f thi s book , I live d i n a larg e hous e fo r th e summer . Spending muc h tim e alon e i n a n unfamilia r are a le d m e t o imagin e wha t I would d o i f someon e walke d i n an d trie d t o hur t me . Eve n thoug h I kne w that I would figh t back , th e though t o f having t o hav e tha t figh t lef t m e feel ing wretched. An d I am stil l afraid I might los e th e battle . I do no t want , no r do I wan t readers , t o los e sigh t o f th e terror , pain , an d injustic e o f sexua l assault a s I discuss th e powe r an d benefit s o f women's self-defense . (I n chap ter 4 I discus s tw o opposin g feminis t worrie s abou t self-defense , firs t tha t self-defense wil l reduc e th e politica l significanc e o f rape , an d secon d tha t self-defense wil l uncriticall y elevat e th e "natural " significanc e o f rap e an d sexuality.) Similarly, i n writin g o n th e pleasure s o f sparrin g an d shooting , m y incli nation i s no t t o das h hopes , readers ' o r m y own , fo r a Utopia n futur e i n which conflict s ar e resolve d peacefully . Promotin g self-defens e a s an impor tant componen t o f th e women' s movemen t mus t no t b e understoo d a s a position o f relinquishe d socia l ideal s o r a s a compromise d ethica l stanc e toward assailant s an d th e socia l institution s tha t suppor t them . N o matte r how enthusiasti c abou t self-defense , w e mus t no t blam e th e victim s (whether o r no t the y figh t back ) bu t rathe r plac e th e ethica l an d lega l responsibility wit h who m i t belongs—th e perpetrators . Finally, man y feminist s wil l undoubtedl y b e suspiciou s of , o r downrigh t unhappy with , m y willingnes s t o embrac e eve n th e arme d wing s o f women' s

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self-defense efforts . Whil e I address som e o f these concern s i n chapter s 4 and 5, I do no t wish t o brin g closur e t o debate s abou t sexua l violenc e an d resis tance. Thi s book aim s to spark som e fruitfu l discussion s amon g conscientiou s groups concerne d wit h women' s freedom . I hope les s to persuade reader s t o adopt a specifi c progra m o r argumen t tha n t o mov e th e debat e t o a ne w level.

Looking Ahead In th e introductio n tha t follows , I explai n th e potentia l o f women' s self defense t o disrup t ou r cultur e o f normalize d violenc e agains t wome n an d even feminis t politic s an d theory. A s I show, a surprising degre e o f ambiva lence abou t women' s aggressio n keep s man y feminist s strongl y oppose d to , or a t best , indifferen t towar d women' s self-defense . Chapte r 1 cover s th e theoretical groun d necessar y t o illuminate ho w self-defense no t only change s the individua l woma n bu t als o constitute s a n interventio n i n th e discourse s of se x differenc e whic h fue l mal e violenc e agains t women . I explai n th e political contex t o f sexed embodimen t i n which mal e aggressio n an d femal e vulnerability ar e cultura l corporea l paradigms . Th e naturalize d embodie d ethos o f rape cultur e make s wome n easy , an d easil y rationalized , target s fo r men's violence . I discus s th e popula r fictio n o f mal e physica l powe r an d female vulnerabilit y i n visual representations , an d the presence o f these rep resentations i n traditional rap e an d self-defense laws , and in many crim e pre vention an d self-defense manual s fo r women . Establishin g th e historica l an d cultural processe s tha t constrai n th e imagine d possibilitie s fo r a female bod y is importan t fo r understandin g ho w self-defens e instructio n ca n be a critica l juncture fo r th e facilitation o f new, previousl y unimagine d realities . The nex t tw o chapters , base d o n m y ethnographi c research , provid e a picture o f self-defens e trainin g an d it s impac t o n th e wome n engage d wit h it. I n chapte r 2 , I describ e wha t wome n lear n i n a variet y o f self-defens e courses, a s I experienced the m a s a participant-observer. Reader s anxiou s t o know wha t goe s o n i n women' s self-defens e classe s migh t wan t t o rea d thi s chapter first . Chapte r 3 provides a more abstrac t an d detached analysi s of selfdefense a s a discours e tha t challenge s traditiona l view s an d create s a ne w female body . Presentin g interview s wit h self-defens e instructor s an d stu dents, I develo p a theoreticall y informe d interpretatio n o f contemporar y self-defense culture , hopin g t o promp t bot h th e communit y an d feminis t theorists t o se e their project s i n ne w ways .

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Preface

The las t tw o chapter s sho w ho w self-defens e bear s o n centra l tension s i n feminist theory , involvin g ho w w e conceptualiz e samenes s an d difference , violence, discursivity , agency , subjectivity , corporeality , an d resistance. Chap ter 4 anticipate s feminis t apath y an d skepticis m towar d women' s combativ e bodily practices , locatin g thos e sentiment s i n tw o overarchin g philosophica l assumptions abou t violenc e an d th e body . Chapte r 5 proposes tha t feminis m place th e bod y a t th e cente r o f it s politica l an d analyti c agenda—tha t i s th e physical o f physica l feminism—an d explain s ho w self-defens e ca n b e under stood withi n a feminis t analyti c framework—th e feminism o f physica l femi nism. I t als o suggest s ho w an d wh y th e women' s self-defens e movemen t might fin d ne w allie s i n sexua l assaul t preventio n education , i n popula r cul ture, an d i n feminis t politics .

Real Knockout s

Introduction: The Challeng e o f th e Self-Defense Movemen t

I wa s onc e a frightene d feminist . I kne w muc h abou t mal e vio lence an d littl e abou t stoppin g it . Whe n m y odysse y int o self-defens e cultur e began, I was neithe r fa n no r critic , bu t simpl y a feminist wit h stron g opinion s and a lack o f confidence i n speakin g out . Whe n I lectured o n sexua l violenc e at th e universit y wher e I worked , I foun d mysel f intimidate d b y th e hostil e men wh o woul d inevitabl y approac h m e afterward . Furthermore , I ha d recently begu n livin g alon e i n a first-floor apartment , an d ha d bee n readin g and lecturin g o n interview s wit h convicte d rapist s (se e Scull y 1990) . Th e sto ries thes e me n told—account s o f hidin g i n women' s bedroo m closet s unti l they wen t t o slee p a t night—cripple d m e psychologically . I couldn' t com e home i n th e evenin g an d rela x withou t checkin g m y closet s an d al l th e othe r hiding place s tha t th e me n talke d about . Attendin g Tak e Bac k th e Nigh t ral lies, hearing one testimon y o f victimization afte r another , lef t m e feeling hope less. That's whe n I took a self-defense clas s and discovere d tha t Nort h America n women i n unprecedented number s ar e learning to knoc k out , maim , an d shoo t men who assaul t them. Mace tear gas spray sales have skyrocketed. Model Mug ging, a nationwide aggressiv e self-defense course , has trained ove r twenty thou sand wome n i n th e Unite d States . Ove r fourtee n millio n America n wome n own handguns . Hundred s o f corporations hav e sponsore d self-defens e trainin g for femal e employees . Increasin g number s o f wome n hav e foun d self-defens e training available a t health club s under name s like "Cardi o Combat " an d "Aer obox." My initia l interes t i n self-defens e wa s no t academic ; m y approac h t o i t wa s devoid o f theories o r hypotheses . Bu t wha t a t first moved m e viscerall y even tually move d m e intellectually . I realized tha t I was holding, i n th e bal l o f m y fist, ke y tension s i n contemporar y feminis t theories—theorie s tha t ar e ofte n

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dismissed a s too abstrac t an d impenetrable t o mak e sens e o f real lives . At the same tim e tha t enactin g a n aggressiv e postur e fel t empowering , i t felt taboo—in m y case doubl y tabo o a s a woman an d a feminist. Fo r even a s current feminis t philosoph y suggest s tha t powe r operate s a t th e leve l o f th e body, muc h o f feminism—which alway s stoo d fo r a heightened conscious ness o f patriarchal mode s o f acting an d thinking—rejects th e possibility tha t anything goo d coul d com e fro m violence . Women's embrac e o f their aggres sive potential prompt s a reexamination o f our understanding s o f violence and resistance t o it , o f ideologies o f gender, an d of feminist theor y itself . Thi s i s why I wanted t o investigate women' s self-defens e an d to offe r a n interpreta tion o f it. As I chose t o continue self-defens e course s a s an ethnographer, I took fiel d notes (althoug h neve r durin g the classes) and asked student s an d instructors fo r interviews. Throughou t m y fieldwork , I gathere d article s o f the movement : buttons, bumpe r stickers , books , videos , newspape r articles , ke y chains , T shirts, whistles, personal alarms, pepper sprays , mini batons, and advertisements for self-defens e course s an d products . I becam e a membe r o f severa l self defense organization s an d subscribed t o their newsletter s an d to magazines lik e Fighting Woman News an d Women and Guns. I wante d t o ge t a sens e o f self defense culture : wha t peopl e discus s an d what the y d o not ; how th e impor tance o f self-defense i s construed; an d how self-defense i s or is not connecte d to othe r issue s facin g women . I did not tak e onl y on e self-defens e course , o r simply a beginner-intermediate-advance d serie s o f on e for m o f self-defens e training (althoug h I did that, too) . I surveyed, experientially , a wide variet y o f self-defense instruction : self-defens e wit h firearms ; aggressiv e unarme d self defense agains t padde d attackers ; women' s self-defens e i n the martial arts ; and a numbe r o f othe r course s sol d a s self-defens e i n martia l art s dojo s (Kra v Maga), aerobic s studio s ("Cardi o Combat") , an d fitness center s ("Boxin g fo r Fitness"). Participating i n self-defense lesson s establishe d a n experiential an d apprecia tive relationshi p wit h th e various practice s an d people I discus s here . I talke d informally wit h fello w self-defensers . I read th e magazines. I wore th e T-shirts. I carrie d th e min i baton—an d hear d th e ensuin g "well-I-won't-mess-with you-then" gib e from countles s men. Most significantly, I went throug h th e selfdefense metamorphosis . I learned t o jab, punch , poke , pull , kick , yell , stomp , shoot, an d eve n kil l wit h m y bar e hands . Bu t th e fighting spiri t i s more tha n that: self-defense transform s th e way it feels to inhabit a female body . I t changes what i t means t o be a woman. Aggression i s a primary marke r o f sexual difference . B y this I do not mea n

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that on e majo r wa y i n whic h me n an d w o m e n naturall y diffe r i s i n thei r capacity an d propensit y fo r aggression . I mea n tha t aggressio n i s on e wa y that w e culturall y tel l me n an d w o m e n apart . T he constructio n an d regula tion o f a naturalized heterosexua l femininit y hinge s o n th e tabo o o f aggres sion, and ofte n wha t challenge s femininit y i s labeled "aggressive. " O u r cultur e i s wedded t o distinguishin g bodie s a s male an d female . Se x i s materialized throug h regulator y norm s surroundin g th e us e of aggression. Cul tural ideals of manhood an d womanhood includ e a cultural, political, aesthetic , and lega l acceptanc e o f men's aggressio n an d a deep skepticism , fear , an d pro hibition o f women's. Thi s se t of assumptions fuel s th e frequenc y an d eas e wit h which me n assaul t women, an d th e cultura l understandin g tha t men' s violenc e is an inevitable , i f unfortunate, biologica l fact . Ironically , a significant amoun t of feminist activis m an d scholarshi p ha s falle n int o thi s trap , failin g t o critiqu e men's presumably natura l power t o rape an d batter, an d neglectin g t o stress th e possibility o f women' s physica l resistance . Self-defens e instructio n show s women ho w t o thwar t assaul t aggressively , an d i n s o doin g throw s ope n fo r critique th e gender ideologie s t o which w e hav e all become mor e o r less habit uated.

The Self-Defense Movement The form s o f self-defense tha t I examin e ar e connecte d b y thei r explici t goa l t o teach women (an d sometimes men also ) to defen d themselve s agains t sexual violence. Thoug h wome n fac e a variet y o f criminals , self-defens e course s teac h women t o han d ove r thei r cars , money, an d othe r possession s an d t o fight bac k only whe n a n attacke r attempt s o r threaten s t o strike , rape , and/o r tak e the m from poin t A to point B. I do not include in this analysis certain methods wome n employ t o diminis h th e likelihoo d o f sexual assault , suc h a s home alar m systems , baggy clothes , cellula r phones , dogs , husbands , safe-wal k programs , an d night time rid e services . Althoug h risk-reducin g strategie s ar e widesprea d an d impor tant, model s o f "rape prevention " tha t kee p women indoor s afte r dar k o r other wise put a restrictive onu s on wome n d o not challeng e men' s freedom relativ e t o women's, no r men' s repute d appetit e an d abilit y fo r physica l coercion . No r d o they repe l th e particula r me n mos t likel y t o caus e wome n harm ; consequently , they hav e neve r bee n controversial . Women' s use s o f weapon s an d thei r ow n bodies fo r self-defens e ar e publicly scrutinize d i n a way tha t husband s an d hom e alarm systems are not—probably becaus e they injure men , an d because the y pro vide women wit h greate r autonomy whil e restricting men's behavior, rathe r tha n

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the opposite . This project als o concerns women wh o defen d themselve s withou t being expose d t o an y forma l self-defens e training , suc h a s women wh o kil l bat tering husbands . While man y wome n hav e fough t bac k agains t attacker s withou t an y self defense lessons , significant trend s i n popular cultur e an d feature s o f contempo rary social life have made self-defense trainin g an increasingly appealing project . For i t i s not onl y a perception o f vulnerability o r a context o f feminist antirap e politics tha t lead s wome n t o self-defens e courses . Women' s self-defens e i s also made popula r an d meaningfu l b y a socia l contex t o f ne w image s tha t mak e women's verba l an d physica l assertivenes s appealing ; a socia l milie u tha t give s the bod y a certain meaning ; an d a culture o f fitness tha t make s women' s bod y work mor e common . During th e 1980s , a "postfeminist " decad e i n whic h wome n wer e though t to hav e finall y mad e i t int o th e rank s o f privilege d men , th e medi a bega n t o cover mor e case s o f sexual violence . Perhap s thi s was , a s some hav e suggeste d (e.g., Faludi 1991) , part o f a "backlash" t o remin d wome n tha t the y ca n be vic timized. Th e 198 9 sexua l assaul t o f th e whit e femal e yuppi e jogging i n N e w York's Centra l Par k perhap s bes t exemplifie s th e wa y i n whic h wome n wer e reminded tha t eve n th e mos t moder n an d powerfu l amon g u s ar e vulnerabl e (Coward 1992). 1 But whateve r it s cause, th e anti-sexua l assaul t movement an d the battere d women' s movemen t hav e begu n t o receiv e th e attentio n the y deserve i n popular medi a an d i n hig h schoo l an d colleg e classrooms . Addition ally, a growin g cultura l concer n wit h violen t crim e (includin g rape , murder , car-jacking, an d nonsexua l assault ) ha s le d t o debate s ove r violence , firearms , and the Second Amendment. I f all of this popular attention t o violent crim e an d the danger s o f male sexualit y ha s made mor e wome n fee l vulnerabl e t o assault , it ha s als o mad e mor e wome n intereste d i n learnin g ho w t o sto p it . Som e o f New York' s aerobic s self-defens e classe s ar e a direc t respons e t o heightene d fears caused by the attack on th e Central Park jogger and the intense media cov erage i t received . On th e heel s o f these trend s ha s emerged a popular discussio n of—an d con cern over—wha t feminis m ha s mad e wome n into . Interestingly , thi s debat e involves th e doubl e accusatio n tha t feminist s hav e mad e wome n to o aggressiv e and unfeminine—witnes s Rus h Limbaugh' s inventio n o f the term femi-nazis — and too helpless and victimized—Katie Roiphe' s (1993 ) belief that women hav e become whinin g victims . Further , debate s abou t wha t kin d o f women w e ar e in th e 1990 s collid e wit h debate s ove r women' s response s t o sexua l assault . I n May 1994 , Ms. magazin e feature d a handgun o n it s cover wit h th e questio n "I s this power feminism? " Th e ris e o f a popular discussio n o f women's right s an d

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement | 5 the danger s o f mal e sexuality , then , ha s als o contribute d t o a growin g interes t in challenge s t o gende r ideolog y an d debate s abou t whic h o f thos e challenge s are mos t appropriate . The recen t cultura l fascinatio n wit h image s o f wome n wh o kno w ho w t o shoot an d fight reflect s thes e concerns . Between 199 0 and 1993 , female charac ters i n popula r televisio n show s suc h a s Murphy Brown, Roseanne, an d Beverly Hills Q0210 took self-defens e classe s and, i n thos e sam e years, several major Hol lywood films feature d wome n wh o sho t gun s (Aliens, Blue Steel, Eve of Destruction, Thelma and Louise, and Point of No Return, th e remak e o f La Femme Nikita) and entere d int o hand-to-han d comba t wit h me n (Aces: Iron Eagle HI, Double Impact). When i t come s t o sex an d violence , th e dominan t representation s i n North America n film an d televisio n displa y an d eroticiz e women' s inabilit y t o defend themselve s o r characteriz e the m a s enjoyin g force d sex . A se t o f alter native image s i s emerging , however . Scene s fro m th e 1990 s includ e th e fol lowing: I n Terminator 2, Linda Hamilto n clobber s men , warnin g th e on e wh o moans tha t she's just broken hi s arm, "Ther e ar e 215 bones i n th e huma n body . That's one. " Susa n Sarandon , i n Thelma and Louise, points a gun t o th e hea d o f a ma n i n a parking lot , who m sh e catche s i n th e ac t o f rape, an d orders , "Yo u let her go , you fuckin ' asshole , o r I' m gonn a splatte r your ugl y fac e al l over thi s nice car, " afte r whic h sh e become s angere d a t hi s defian t attitud e an d shoot s him straigh t throug h th e heart . These medi a image s offe r ne w fantasie s o f wha t wome n ca n b e whic h res t on women' s abilitie s to se t boundaries, defen d themselves , an d ente r int o com bat, especiall y wit h aggressiv e men . Thi s cultura l shif t t o a new , aggressiv e woman i n popula r films, televisio n show s (e.g. , American Gladiators), comi c books (e.g. , Hothead Paisan, Silver Sable), and advertisement s (e.g. , Die t Coke , Revlon) i s no t onl y visual . Th e sass y rap , rock , an d pun k "rio t grrrl " band s sound thi s fres h femal e brassiness . Fro m singin g th e praise s o f independen t womanhood (Sal t ' n Pepa ) an d proclaimin g t o me n tha t "you'r e no t knockin ' this hiney " (Roxann e Shante) , t o shoutin g ou t th e lyrics , "Dea d me n don' t rape" (Seve n Yea r Bitch ) an d enactin g o n stag e a fantas y o f retaliatio n agains t gang rape , cuttin g of f a fake peni s wit h a knife whil e singin g "Fra t Pig " (Trib e 8), ne w women' s band s exemplif y a fantas y o f femal e entitlemen t an d a n off beat ange r a t men's violenc e agains t women . In thi s contex t o f media-enhance d fea r o f violen t crime , media-produce d "mean women " moguls , an d ne w course s an d product s fo r "persona l protec tion" an d "urba n security, " self-defens e erupt s a s an increasingl y popula r bod y project. Bod y project s ar e a definin g featur e o f lif e i n moder n Wester n soci ety. Th e bod y i s increasingl y th e sit e o f consciou s control , o f identit y reflex -

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ively negotiated an d lived out , an d thu s the foundatio n fo r a sense of self (Gid dens 1991) . Th e bod y offer s th e possibilit y o f constructin g a reliable sens e o f self i n a posttraditiona l ag e o f uncertainty , wher e Go d i s dea d an d politica l authorities an d political ideals seem farcical. Th e man y globa l risks and danger s we fac e make us yearn for somethin g for which w e ca n be responsible an d ove r which w e ca n hav e som e control . I n thes e times , w e als o hav e a ne w an d remarkable leve l o f control ove r ou r bodies , multiplyin g th e choice s w e mus t make abou t them . A s we decide , ami d a n arra y o f possibilities, wha t kind s o f diet, exercise , medica l intervention , an d adornmen t ar e appropriat e fo r ou r bodies, w e incarnat e a collectio n o f cultura l sign s an d socia l codes . W e wea r our feelings—ou r fait h i n particula r institutions , ou r politics , an d ou r identi ties—on ou r arms . Contemporary Westerner s hav e com e t o se e bodie s a s "malleabl e entitie s which ca n b e shape d an d hone d b y th e vigilanc e an d har d wor k o f their own ers'' (Shillin g 1993 , 5) . Henc e th e degre e t o whic h t o th e healt h an d fitness movements hav e capture d women' s attention . Thi s investmen t i n ou r bodie s with mora l meanin g make s th e bod y al l the mor e difficult t o par t with . Mod ern fear s o f deat h ca n b e s o grea t precisel y because , paradoxica l a s it is , we ar e invested i n th e finite bod y a s a primary sourc e o f meaning. Th e body' s rol e a s a reflexiv e project , and a s somethin g fate d t o di e o n us , increase s women' s investment i n controllin g thei r physica l destinies . Th e AID S epidemi c intensi fies that investmen t b y making any rap e potentially life-threatening . An d a s the body i s increasingly endowe d wit h meaning s lik e "fre e person " o r "equa l citi zen," th e integrit y o f th e bod y an d others ' respec t fo r it s physical-ethica l boundaries gro w al l the mor e consequential . Most hav e no w hear d on e o r mor e statistic s suggestin g tha t a staggerin g number o f U.S . wome n will , som e tim e i n thei r lives , encounte r a ma n wh o tries, successfull y o r not , t o rap e them . Mos t hav e als o heard tha t wome n wit h male partner s stan d a horrifyingly goo d chanc e o f being beaten , an d o f havin g rape accompan y th e battery. 2 I n cas e i t need s t o b e stated , som e me n d o no t rape or batter and, of course, the ones who d o don't manag e t o victimize every body. Ultimatel y i t matter s les s exactl y ho w man y me n d o it , o r ho w man y women ar e victimized , an d mor e tha t enoug h me n ar e violen t t o mak e al l women afrai d o f being attacke d (Gordo n an d Rige r 1989) . While sexua l violence i s not th e onl y fear women confron t o r the onl y for m of oppressio n the y endure , wome n nevertheles s wan t t o kno w wha t t o d o i f they fac e sexua l assault . Almos t al l wome n hav e experience d on e o r mor e threats alon g th e continuu m o f sexual violence: threatenin g phon e calls , sexual harassment, flashing, and/o r stalking , act s al l th e mor e controllin g o f wome n

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precisely because we fear what lies on th e far end o f that continuum—rape, bat tery, an d murder . Som e wome n kno w th e pai n o f sexual violenc e fro m child hood. Othe r wome n fac e immediat e threa t fro m me n i n thei r lives . Still other s are simpl y scare d o r tire d o f being scared . Women ar e not th e only victims of violence in our society. Men, thoug h no t nearly as often victimize d sexuall y or by romantic partners , can also be scared of , and d o face , victimizatio n b y ca r thieves , AT M robbers , drive-b y shooters , gangs, burglars, muggers, and murderers. Men's violenc e agains t men, however , even whe n sexual , is usually socially recognized a s violence wherea s women ar e often blame d fo r precipitating , inviting , o r deservin g men' s violenc e agains t them. When wome n trai n to fight back , the y def y gende r norms. It' s manly, bu t not womanly , t o protec t an d fight. 3 Me n ar e suppose d t o protec t an d defen d women, a notion notoriou s fo r it s unreliability (n o woman ha s a protector a t all times, som e don' t wan t a protector a t all, and in an y case women ar e most ofte n victimized b y me n wh o supposedl y protec t them ) ye t convenien t fo r keepin g women i n a victimized position . In self-defense , wome n maste r action s o f which the y ar e ofte n deeme d inca pable. Th e presume d inabilit y t o fight i n par t define s heterosexua l femininity . The reificatio n o f gende r a s natural , particularl y men' s invulnerabilit y an d women's helplessness—i n popula r media , i n traditiona l rap e an d self-defens e laws, and eve n i n crim e preventio n advic e fo r wome n an d colleg e rap e preven tion programs—i s a centra l tene t o f rap e culture . Ou r societ y i s a rap e cultur e because sexua l violenc e (includin g al l gender-motivate d assault s suc h a s incest , rape, battery , an d murder ) an d th e fea r o f violenc e ar e subtl y accepte d a s th e norm. 4 Rape culture' s models of sexuality and gender perpetuate men' s violenc e and women's fear . Rap e cultur e accept s men's sexua l aggressio n agains t wome n as normal, sexy , and/o r inevitable , an d ofte n regard s women' s refusa l o f it i s as pathological, unnatural , an d "aggressive." 5 W o m e n wh o tak e self-defense instruction , wit h whateve r motivation s an d ideological perspectives , ar e offere d a n implici t o r explici t critiqu e o f th e ways in whic h gende r i s constructed i n a culture o f male privileg e whic h rest s on th e abus e o f women . Wha t i s usuall y take n fo r grante d a s a fac t o f nature—that a woman simpl y canno t physicaU y challeng e a man—is reveale d as a social scrip t whic h privilege s me n a t th e expens e o f women . Th e influ ence o f gende r ideologie s o n ou r bodil y disposition s surface s i n self-defens e instruction, wher e wome n gai n th e capacit y fo r verba l an d physica l aggres sion. Gende r ideolog y i s thu s no t simpl y a matte r o f th e mind ; i t include s embodied socia l values . Self-defens e offer s th e possibilit y o f a critica l con sciousness o f gender' s influenc e o n wha t w e se e a s mal e an d femal e bodies .

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Introduction:

The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement

As such , i t i s a "fina l frontier " o f feminis t consciousness-raising—a n effor t that ha s traditionall y focuse d o n th e mind , no t th e body , a s th e recipien t o f ideology. As increasing numbers o f North America n wome n tak e pride an d pleasure i n the deploymen t o f their bodies i n ways previously though t impossible , we lear n not onl y the stories by which rap e culture is rationalized, bu t als o how th e socia l order impose s itsel f at the leve l o f the body . Gende r ideolog y i s not a matter o f psychology as opposed to biology. Gende r ideolog y affect s th e wa y w e interpre t and experienc e ou r physica l bodies . I f contemporary feminis m ha s enable d th e transformation o f women's consciousness , and has spawned a critique o f the wa y the female body has been treated, represented, an d thought of , self-defens e train ing reveals how th e traditiona l sexis t ideas actually find thei r wa y int o th e func tioning o f the bod y itself . Thu s self-defens e transform s th e real m o f bodily pos sibilities fo r women , an d present s a new for m o f "consciousness " complemen tary, an d crucial , t o th e feminis t movement . Feminist s hav e long considere d th e ways in which gende r seem s like biology but reall y isn't; self-defense illuminate s the way s that gende r i s an ideolog y inseparabl e from , an d alterabl e through , th e lived body . This i s not t o sugges t tha t self-defenser s she d th e ideolog y whic h naturalize s sexism an d trad e i t i n fo r th e "rea l truth. " A powerful , consequentia l under standing abou t womanhoo d i s possible , a "rea l truth " i s not . Self-defenser s come u p wit h ne w version s o f womanhood, ne w value s an d idea s whic h def y rather tha n accommodat e rap e culture . Self-defens e enable s us both t o questio n the way s tha t w e ar e defined , categorized , an d embodied , an d t o defin e our selves anew . Thi s i s wha t make s women' s self-defens e a socia l movemen t fo r social change .

The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement The self-defens e movemen t no t onl y change s th e wa y wome n thin k abou t themselves an d abou t violence . I t chip s awa y a t th e collectiv e assuranc e me n have ha d tha t women canno t an d will not fight bac k an d transform s th e gende r ideologies tha t suppor t th e incidenc e o f rape. Self-defens e expose s gende r a s a cultural meanin g syste m whos e statu s a s a natural fac t o f human differenc e an d the caus e o f women's vulnerabilit y i s a key myt h o f rape culture . Self-defense cultur e produces a new understanding , no t shared by many peo ple, about what a woman ca n be. Many women wh o tak e and teach self-defens e classes are not self-defined feminists , althoug h it has clearly been feminist activist s

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement |

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who hav e raise d publi c awarenes s abou t sexua l violence . Th e self-defense r ca n be an y of the following: a lesbian fo r who m havin g a male protector i s neither a desire no r a n option ; a mothe r wh o conceive s o f hersel f a s a virtuou s "mam a bear" protectin g he r young ; a membe r o f th e traum a recover y movemen t fo r whom learnin g t o defen d hersel f i s secondar y t o th e "inner " benefit s o f self defense training ; a Wall Stree t yuppie fo r who m aggressio n i s part o f profession alization; o r a self-conscious diete r whose regula r aerobic s cours e became "Car dio Combat. " Thoug h self-defens e bring s togethe r man y wome n wh o d o no t necessarily defin e themselve s a s feminists , i t offer s som e importan t lesson s tha t could easil y be considere d feminist . As I shal l elaborat e i n chapte r 1 , femininit y involve s deferrin g t o men , fo r instance me n wh o wan t sex . On e woma n takin g self-defense , afte r practicin g to yell "No! " remarked , "That' s th e first tim e I'v e eve r sai d 'no.' " Self-defens e helps wome n und o th e enslavin g feminin e identit y o f deference, kindness , an d weakness tha t me n s o ofte n tak e advantag e of , b y gettin g the m t o imagin e an d practice aggressivel y refusin g men' s advances . I t als o enable s wome n t o tak e themselves mor e seriousl y an d t o approac h men' s demand s an d whim s wit h a different kin d o f thoughtfulness an d consideration . In thei r boo k base d o n interview s wit h survivor s o f attempte d an d com pleted rape , Bar t an d O'Brie n (1985 , 14 ) sa y tha t "th e bes t overal l advic e w e could offe r wome n t o increas e th e probabilit y o f avoidin g rap e i s 'Don' t b e a nice girl.' " Self-defense instructio n tell s women ho w t o avoi d th e habit s of nice girls and becom e mean women instead. Wome n ca n find i t difficul t t o us e phys ical force agains t someon e the y kno w (Bar t an d O'Brie n 1985) , an d sinc e ove r 80 percen t o f assailant s attac k wome n the y kno w (Kos s an d Harve y 1991) , rewriting th e scrip t o f feminin e deferenc e i s crucial . Thi s i s precisel y wh y women i n self-defens e course s unlear n th e habit s o f polite, complian t feminin e conversation. Women lear n thei r ow n valu e i n self-defense classes , and begin t o se e them selves a s worth fighting for . Th e experienc e o f sexua l violenc e contribute s t o women's wea k sens e o f self in th e first place . Abus e an d violenc e ca n progres sively induc e i n wome n a state o f boundarilessness o r "ownability " (Gidyc z e t al. 1993 ; Wyatt , Guthrie , an d Notgras s 1992) . Self-defens e ca n interrup t thi s vicious circl e o f vulnerability. On e stud y ha s show n tha t survivor s o f rape ha d a lowe r sens e o f confidenc e i n thei r abilitie s an d powe r t o impac t th e worl d around the m (wha t researcher s cal l a sense o f "self-efficacy") tha n wome n wh o had no t bee n raped . Afte r takin g a self-defens e class , though , th e survivors ' sense o f self-efficacy ha d increase d t o th e sam e level as that o f women wh o ha d not been raped , whose sens e had strengthened a s well (Oze r and Bandura 1990) .

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Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement

Self-defense i s a primary vehicle for women's achievemen t o f a sense of author ity an d self-worth . Violence—defined a s physica l forc e exerte d wit h th e inten t o f damaging , controlling, or stopping someone—is usually used as a form o f control, to redres s something th e aggresso r see s as a moral wron g (Campbel l 1993 , 13 ; Katz 1988) . Men hav e typicall y been th e one s to us e violence i n thi s way. Rap e ca n be see n as such a form o f redress : Me n wh o fee l entide d t o th e se x the y wan t t o hav e with a n unwillin g woma n ma y constru e he r sexua l unavailabilit y o r refusa l a s a moral wrong which warrant s redres s (se e Beneke 1982 ; Scully 1990) . Put differ ently, men who rape , like many of those who attac k and murder (se e Katz 1988) , often ge t violen t wit h a sens e o f righteousness—a s thoug h th e woma n ha d teased, dared , o r defie d them , a s though the y wer e simpl y defendin g thei r ow n rights to th e identit y an d self-wort h tha t a woman exercisin g self-determinatio n took away . Th e sam e coul d be sai d of battering, a s men wh o bea t thei r intimat e partners us e violenc e an d intimidatio n t o contro l wha t the y perceiv e t o b e a threatening, offensiv e femal e self-determination . B y this logic, female self-deter mination i s a moral wrong whic h seem s t o warran t violen t redress . Self-defens e culture turn s thi s around: Assault , becaus e i t snub s a woman's sens e o f worth, i s the mora l wron g tha t warrant s th e redres s o f self-defense . Violence betwee n wome n an d me n ha s no t bee n a for m o f "subject-sub ject" violenc e i n whic h equal s in statu s engag e i n combat . Rather , th e poin t o f most violenc e agains t wome n i s t o reaffir m tha t wome n ar e incapabl e o f responding: "Rap e engender s a sexualized femal e bod y define d a s a wound, a body exclude d from subject-subjec t violence , from th e ability to engage in a fair fight. Rapist s d o no t bea t wome n a t th e gam e o f violence, bu t ai m t o exclud e us fro m playin g i t altogether' ' (Marcu s 1992 , 397) . A battere r enforce s hi s authority by causing pain. "Wha t h e is engaging in is not fighting a t all; it is terrorism" (Gillespi e 1989 , 69). Self-defense treat s such violent assaults as scripted interactions that women ar e capable o f interrupting . Thi s begin s t o dismantl e th e assumptio n tha t wome n have victim-bodies, tha t is , weak, small , boundariless, an d ineffectiv e bodies . I n practicing bruta l resistanc e t o men' s attacks , self-defens e trainin g counter s th e popular attribution s o f the "unstoppabl e attacker " rol e t o me n an d "disempow ered victim " rol e t o women . Self-defens e course s trea t sexua l assaul t a s " a scripted interactio n i n whic h on e perso n audition s fo r th e rol e o f rapis t an d strives to maneuve r anothe r perso n int o th e rol e o f victim" (Marcu s 1992 , 391). Self-defensers lear n tha t matchin g a n assailan t verbally , withou t eve r gettin g physical, will usually successfull y spoi l his efforts. The y als o learn ho w t o physi cally hur t me n i n cas e verba l defens e technique s d o no t succeed . I n practicin g

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement |

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that verba l an d physica l aggression , the y rehears e a n intoleranc e fo r men' s attempts t o coerc e an d contro l women . Because violenc e agains t wome n depend s upo n th e myt h o f mal e strengt h and femal e weakness , rap e cultur e depend s upo n th e impossibilit y an d inap propriateness o f women' s aggression . Rap e i s no t simpl y a n unfortunat e side effect o f nature. A man' s abilit y t o accomplis h rap e depend s mor e o n languag e and interpretatio n tha n unbeatabl e physica l forc e (Marcu s 1992) . Bar t an d O'Brien's (1985 ) researc h showe d tha t fou r o f five rap e attempt s fail , an d ar e particularly likel y t o fai l i f the woma n put s u p a fight. Anothe r stud y reveale d that wome n wh o fough t bac k forcefull y wer e mor e likel y t o avoi d rap e tha n women wh o di d not fight back , whether o r not th e attacker had a weapon (Ull man an d Knight 1993) . Finally, no statistica l evidence supports the popular con tention tha t a woman's arme d self-defens e agains t sexua l assaul t usuall y fail s o r results i n he r disarmament. 6 Rape i s both a product an d a cause o f gender inequalit y (Brownmille r 1975 ; MacKinnon 1989 , 245). For rape is not merel y se x without consent . Rap e i s the violent impositio n o f a particular sexuality . Th e aggressiv e refusa l t o b e rape d therefore resist s th e impositio n o f a sex-clas s status . Women' s cultivatio n o f aggressivity challenge s th e naturalize d gende r polarit y tha t ha s legitimated onl y men's violence . Learnin g ho w t o fight bac k expose s rap e cultur e a s an embod ied ideology precisely because i t gets disembodied i n self-defens e training . Self defense emphasize s a t onc e th e historica l productio n o f gendere d identitie s a t the leve l o f socia l interactio n an d a t th e leve l o f th e body . Th e self-defens e movement furthe r undermine s th e victim-bod y assumptio n becaus e wome n need no t ge t rape d o r beate n t o sa y the y ar e oppressed , o r sa y rap e i s wron g because th e bod y i s sacred o r becaus e (consensual ) se x with me n i s natural an d good. An d a s self-defens e change s th e meaning s o f gender , aggression , an d oppression, i t als o alter s th e meanin g o f rape . Self-defense actuall y turns rape into a n act that is understood no t a s the resul t of natural sex differences bu t a s an act that produces th e embodie d ide a of them. Rape i s a n ac t o f socia l sexin g (Plaz a 1981 , 33) . Self-defens e frame s th e rap e attempt a s a fight, an d thu s deconstruct s th e traditiona l term s o f th e event , which enabl e men's assault s and thwart women's resistance . Self-defense poten tially denaturalize s rap e withou t naturalizin g sex . Self-defense als o encourage s i n wome n a sense tha t thei r bodie s ar e no t just things tha t hous e thei r intellects , o r thing s t o b e gaze d a t o r sexuall y taken . Bu t neither ar e they simply the rea l property o f women, appendage s t o be defende d by th e woma n wit h th e will , arme d wit h assaul t techniques , o r furiou s wit h feminist consciousness . Self-defens e trainin g transforms th e female body , an d i n

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Introduction:

The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement

so doing , th e femal e consciousness—i n a wa y tha t destroy s th e distinctio n between bod y an d mind. Th e fighting bodie s struggling for dignity , survival, o r just t o "ge t thi s sweat y pi g of f o f me " ar e no t body-thing s bu t body-selve s struggling t o b e live d an d represente d i n differen t terms , "term s whic h gran t women th e capacity for independence an d autonomy, whic h thu s far have bee n attributed onl y t o men " (Gros z 1994 , xiii). Traditionally, i n rap e interactions , wome n becom e subject s o f fear; throug h self-defense, a rap e interactio n make s wome n int o potentia l agent s o f aggres sion (Marcu s 1992) . Discarding the feminine manner s that rape culture demand s proves consequentia l fo r women' s dail y lives. 7 Furthermore , sinc e a woman' s chance o f a successfu l self-defens e clai m i n cour t decrease s i f i t ca n b e estab lished tha t sh e wa s angr y (Bochna k 1981a ; Gillespi e 1989 ; Walke r 1989) , women's growin g entitlemen t t o aggressio n an d anger , throug h self-defens e training, ha s important lega l implications . M y ai m i s not t o ge t wome n t o dis cover tha t the y "reall y are " angr y o r aggressive , o r t o encourag e wome n t o determine wh o the y ar e throug h self-defens e skills . My ai m i s to examin e an d understand gender , aggression , an d sexua l assaul t in way s tha t creat e a n oppor tunity fo r transformin g ou r body-selve s fro m object s o f patriarcha l reflectio n into agent s agains t patriarcha l oppression . Often feminist s ar e berated fo r analyzin g oppressio n withou t offerin g strate gies fo r resistin g tha t oppression . Self-defens e arrives , i n ou r faces , a s feminis t resistance. We ar e not s o oppressed tha t we can' t make an intervention; wome n are challengin g th e inevitabilit y o f men's violence—an d no t just throug h theo retical pronouncements. Significan t aspect s o f feminism's institutiona l an d ide ological history , however , hav e lef t muc h o f feminism distan t from , an d eve n skeptical of , women' s aggression .

Feminist Ambivalence about Women's Aggression Feminism ha s been instrumenta l i n challengin g bot h th e politica l constructio n of heterosexual femininit y an d the social sanctions on wome n wh o d o no t con form t o it . Additionally , claimin g th e rag e tha t wome n hav e bee n denie d i s a popular women' s therapeuti c practice . At th e sam e time , though , feminis t the ories have emphasize d women' s greate r sensitivity , care , empathy , an d procliv ity for connectio n (Burac k 1994 , 112-13) . And w e hav e been s o busy analyzin g women's victimizatio n b y men' s aggressio n tha t w e hav e almos t reifie d men' s power t o coerc e wome n physically , failin g t o highligh t women' s potentia l fo r fighting back .

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement | 1 3 For instance , i n th e recen t 450-pag e antholog y wit h th e promisin g titl e Transforming a Rape Culture (Buchwald , Fletcher , an d Rot h 1993) , ther e i s bu t one articl e o n th e subjec t o f women' s counterviolence . Locate d i n a sectio n called "Vision s an d Possibilities, " i t present s " a tangl e o f difficul t questions " (Clarke 1993 , 403). On e migh t suspec t tha t th e boo k offer s way s t o transfor m rape cultur e tha t ar e simpl y mor e collectiv e an d materia l tha n women' s self defense seem s t o be , fo r instanc e John Stoltenberg' s (1993 , 213-21 ) proposa l t o make rap e a n electio n issue . However , Transforming a Rape Culture mainl y includes article s that , base d o n a classic feminis t insistenc e tha t "th e persona l i s political," sugges t ho w t o redefin e masculinit y (e.g. , Miedzia n 1993) , ho w t o raise girl s fo r th e twenty-firs t centur y (e.g. , E . Buchwal d 1993) , ho w se x edu cation i n th e publi c school s shoul d teac h kid s abou t consen t an d bodil y integrity, an d ho w peopl e shoul d spea k ou t agains t pornograph y (e.g. , Stoltenberg 1993 , 221-22). Those article s that d o focu s o n activis t organization s and include d i n th e sectio n calle d "Activism, " fo r instanc e "Trainin g fo r Safe house" ( a battered women' s shelter ) (C . Buchwald 1993) , don't b y thei r natur e exclude self-defense . Afte r all , self-defens e i s n o les s activis t an d collective—i t involves education , advocacy , fundraising , instructo r trainin g an d certification , conferences, an d lega l reform . Put anothe r way , trainin g women fo r self-defens e i s no mor e individualisti c than helpin g wome n leav e batterin g relationship s o r changin g men' s attitudes . The boo k practicall y ignore s self-defens e becaus e th e author s fai l t o entertai n the possibilit y that , fo r instance , redefinin g masculinit y o r th e sex-educatio n curriculum migh t includ e changin g th e sens e o f physical superiorit y boy s hav e over girls , o r tha t trainin g fo r physica l comba t coul d hel p girl s i n th e twenty first centur y a s much a s raising their self-esteem . Tacklin g masculinit y a s well as the institutiona l suppor t fo r violenc e agains t wome n i s an extremel y importan t feminist effort . Bu t to o ofte n th e effor t stop s there , withou t suggestin g tha t women migh t be able to do something about th e violence . Even mos t feminist s seem reluctan t t o stres s tha t unti l mor e rapist s an d batterer s g o t o priso n an d until masculinity, sex education, an d the media hav e been reformed , a man wh o does mak e a violent mov e coul d b e stopped . In a n articl e calle d "Whos e Bod y I s It, Anyway? Transformin g Ourselve s t o Change a Rap e Culture, " Pamel a R . Fletche r (1993 , 440 ) recollect s severa l occasions o f sexual assault , lamentin g disempowere d responses , imaginin g ne w ones: What i f w e girl s i n junio r hig h an d hig h schoo l believe d w e deserv e respect rathe r tha n verba l an d sexua l abus e fro m ou r mal e classmates ?

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What i f we girl s in m y hig h schoo l had confronte d th e gan g of boys wh o raped Rache l tha t nigh t i n th e footbal l field twent y years ago, rather tha n perpetuated tha t cycl e of abuse and shame she suffered? Wha t i f Larry an d I ha d confronte d Dann y fo r rapin g Brend a tha t summe r nigh t i n he r apartment? Wha t i f Brenda ha d felt saf e enoug h t o tel l Larry, me, an d th e police? What i f the wome n i n Wyoming ha d confronte d tha t ma n whil e he terrorize d m e rathe r tha n defende d him ? Wha t i f they ha d protected , comforted, an d supported me ? What i f we female s believed ourselve s an d each other t o be a s important an d deserving of our selfhoo d a s we believ e males t o be ? Just imagine . What i f Rachel ha d broke n som e knee s o n tha t footbal l field? Wha t i f Brend a had rupture d Danny' s testicles ? Violen t resistanc e jus t doesn' t see m t o b e a n option i n thi s long lis t o f "wha t ifs. " But just imagine . Feminist cultura l critic s hav e ofte n encourage d wome n t o resis t mal e dom ination b y rallyin g aroun d th e way s i n whic h wome n hav e learne d t o b e dif ferent from men . Thes e critic s locat e women' s strengt h a s a cultural an d polit ical force i n thei r failur e o r refusa l t o b e violen t lik e me n (e.g. , Morga n 1989) . In he r boo k Men, Women, and Aggression, Ann e Campbel l (1993 , 1 ) argues tha t men an d wome n hav e "separat e styles " of aggression: "Wome n se e aggressio n as a temporary los s o f contro l cause d b y overwhelmin g pressur e an d resultin g in guilt . Me n se e aggressio n a s a means o f exertin g contro l ove r othe r peopl e when the y fee l th e nee d t o reclai m powe r an d self-esteem " (ibid. , viii) . Whe n women se e or use aggression in men's mode , Campbel l (ibid. , ix) suggests, the y have trade d i n thei r ow n vie w fo r men's . I n thi s logic , women' s aggressiv e refusal t o be assaulte d ca n be conflate d wit h masculinis m o r a political failure t o resist mal e domination . It' s just no t revolutionar y enough . Feminists hav e oppose d al l sort s o f violence , protestin g no t onl y rap e an d battery bu t war , th e draft , an d eve n wha t hav e com e t o b e regarde d a s violen t "phallotechnologies" (e.g. , Caput i 1993) . Standin g behin d phrase s lik e "vio lence beget s violence " an d "th e end s don' t justify th e means, " man y feminist s have suspecte d tha t women' s cultivatio n o f aggressive personalitie s an d bodies , especially whe n pleasurable , amount s t o gettin g dupe d b y mal e domination . Feminists hav e trie d no t t o "pla y int o th e patriarchy " b y playin g men' s game s and sharin g "male " values . Fro m thi s vantage point , women' s embrac e o f vio lence smack s o f getting i n th e pigst y wit h th e pigs . This explain s wh y s o man y feminist s objec t t o th e aforementione d musica l performance b y Trib e 8 , th e all-femal e ban d tha t sever s a fake peni s o n stage . Their performanc e a t th e 199 4 Michiga n Womyn' s Musi c Festiva l wa s protested b y a number o f feminists wh o wer e offende d b y Tribe 8' s embrac e o f

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement | 1 5 (fantasized) violenc e agains t me n (Humme l an d Mantill a 1994) . Protester s objected t o th e violenc e the y though t th e performanc e implied , a s well a s it s supposed connectio n wit h sadomasochis m (t o whic h the y als o objec t becaus e of the patriarcha l violenc e the y thin k i t implies). Tribe 8 does no t advocat e th e castration o f rapists, but the y d o believe tha t fantasized violenc e ca n be a cathartic ritual useful fo r displayin g women's ange r at past and potential sexual aggressors (Humme l an d Mantill a 1994 , 16) . Suc h a celebrator y expressio n o f women's violenc e appear s quit e misguide d t o feminist s wh o oppos e violenc e across th e board . That oppositio n account s fo r th e article s i n Ms. magazine' s 199 4 issu e o n women an d guns, which declar e that "powe r feminism " i s not a gun. Ann Jones (1994, 44 ) ask s Ms. readers , "Ho w d o w e ar m wome n wit h awarenes s an d th e courage t o liv e fre e o f violence?" Fo r Jones, it' s cowardl y an d naiv e t o pac k a pistol. Stoppin g violen t me n i s "no t a jo b t o b e don e piecemea l b y lon e women, arme d wit h pearl-handle d pistols , picking of f batterers an d rapist s on e by one. " Jones argue s tha t wome n ar e bein g duped , an d buyin g int o "age-ol d patriarchal notion s o f an ey e fo r a n eye " (ibid. , 37) . I n a different forum , Jack lyn Coc k (1994 , 165 ) suggest s tha t women' s engagemen t wit h violenc e migh t be a "right-wing feminism, " on e i n whic h wome n join th e existin g masculin e hierarchy an d cultivat e a masculin e sens e o f self . Fo r Coc k thi s i s a feminis m "stripped o f its revolutionary potential " an d "doe s nothin g t o challeng e th e sta tus quo " (ibid.) . Even skepticis m directe d specificall y towar d women' s defensiv e us e o f firearms misse s the similaritie s in fundamental aspect s o f self-defense instructio n and th e connection s amon g variou s form s o f self-defens e fo r man y wome n involved. Fo r instance , a woman migh t tak e a firearms cours e an d a martial art s course a s training fo r differen t type s o f threats . Moreover , feminists ' cynicis m over femal e aggressio n come s a t th e pric e o f excluding wome n fro m a citizen ship statu s tha t presuppose s th e potentia l t o ac t aggressivel y i n self-defense . Keeping women awa y fro m violenc e als o preserves th e exclusiv e associatio n o f violence an d masculinity . While feminist s emphasiz e women' s righ t t o sa y n o t o se x wit h men , t o report rap e t o th e police , o r t o ge t respec t fro m men , w e stil l position wome n as responding t o men' s initiatives . Pu t differently , eve n i n feminis t discussions , women win d u p positioned a s acted upo n sexually , rathe r tha n a s active agents . Of course, feminists hav e emphasized women' s victimizatio n fo r tw o importan t reasons. One, women ar e often coerce d an d acted upon. Second , thoug h i n ou r popular cultur e wome n ar e represente d a s havin g sexua l agency , i t i s a mas culinist representatio n o f femal e agenc y wher e tha t agenc y amount s t o th e

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The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement

active seekin g o f th e ver y sexua l encounter s me n forc e o n wome n i n rea l lif e (MacKinnon 1989) . But b y directin g laws, money, an d lega l criticis m towar d probin g masculin ity an d makin g women' s postrap e live s mor e tolerabl e (providin g therap y fo r survivors o f rap e an d woma n abuse , gettin g rapist s an d batterer s convicted) , instead of toward makin g male violence impossibl e (highlightin g women's abil ities t o resis t assault) , men's powe r t o coerc e wome n physicall y become s natu ralized i n th e popula r imagination . Attempt s t o sto p men' s violenc e agains t women solel y throug h lega l deterrenc e an d plea s t o me n als o subtl y presum e that me n simpl y hav e th e powe r t o trounce , rathe r tha n assum e tha t wome n might b e abl e t o sabotag e men' s abilit y t o d o s o (Marcu s 1992 , 388) . When wome n ar e th e focu s o f assault prevention efforts , attempt s t o reduc e their vulnerabilit y t o assaul t commonl y involv e controllin g o r restrictin g thei r behavior, a s if ther e wer e n o othe r wa y wome n coul d preven t victimization . For instance , certai n privat e college s stil l maintain earl y curfew s fo r femal e stu dents. Som e campu s Rap e Preventio n Educatio n Program s explicitl y attemp t to increas e women' s sens e o f vulnerabilit y s o tha t the y willingl y restric t thei r own behavio r (see , e.g., Gra y e t al. 1990 ; Hanson an d Gidyc z 1993 ; Mynatt an d Allgeier 1990) . Othe r suc h program s implicitl y confir m women' s helplessnes s by focusin g almos t exclusivel y o n men' s heterosexua l predation , women' s vul nerability t o it , an d th e cultura l celebratio n o f both, withou t offerin g th e pos sibility o f resistance o r self-defens e training . Although thes e programs , lik e self-defens e programs , attemp t t o challeng e the cultura l normativit y o f men' s sexua l violence , the y d o no t actuall y chal lenge men' s understanding s o f their bodie s o r o f sexuality a s much a s they ge t men t o restrai n themselve s aroun d th e "weake r sex"—a n approac h doome d t o fail precisely because i t fails to ge t men t o questio n thei r sense o f physical supe riority an d t o respec t wome n a s equa l citizen s (McCaughe y an d Kin g 1995 , 376). Rap e attempt s ar e no t treate d a s venture s tha t ca n fail , bu t a s virtuall y inevitable onc e me n hav e th e biology, attitudes , socialization, o r vocabulary o f motive. Further, b y presuming tha t onc e a man goe s to rape , the actio n i s practically inescapable, w e positio n wome n a s intrinsicall y vulnerable . Perhap s som e women nee d t o b e tol d tha t the y ar e no t invincible , tha t the y coul d indee d b e assaulted. Bu t tellin g wome n tha t the y ar e vulnerabl e i s certainl y no t a s pre ventative a s rape preventio n coul d get . B y fixating o n th e har m o f men's vio lence an d women' s vulnerabilit y t o i t rathe r tha n o n ho w wome n ca n sto p it , feminists hav e inadvertentl y constructe d wome n a s victim s an d caregiver s o f victims.

Introduction: The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement |

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Federal agencies , stat e an d loca l governments , privat e foundations , churches, an d traditiona l women' s servic e organization s hav e bee n les s willin g to support financiall y thos e practices associate d with feminis m the y perceive t o be "radical. " Consequently , th e mor e moderat e feminis t socia l services suc h a s hot line s an d counselin g fo r victim s o f violence receiv e mor e fundin g (Searle s and Berge r 1987 , 78) . A s th e antirap e movemen t gaine d legitimacy , an d increasingly relie d o n governmen t funding , i t construe d rap e as a crime o f violence an d no t se x (Matthew s 1994 , 153 ) an d becam e centere d o n satisfyin g th e needs o f victims . Similarly , a s th e battere d women' s movemen t becam e increasingly formalized , batterin g was established, ofte n fo r strategi c reasons , as a uniqu e phenomeno n o f physical abus e rathe r tha n a s an issu e o f power an d control (Schneide r 1992b) . Thi s inadvertentl y "psychiatrized " battere d women, removin g the m fro m thei r place a s casualties o f a gender wa r an d cre ating the m a s persons wit h deep , complicate d psychologie s (Frase r 1989 , 176 77). And s o this set of cultural mechanism s establishe d contemporar y feminis m as a victim service s squad . Many rap e crisi s center s d o offe r self-defens e classes , an d som e battere d women's shelter s hav e referral s t o self-defens e course s o r hav e a self-defens e instructor com e t o th e shelte r t o teac h wome n there . However , thes e offering s are limited. Women's shelters , for instance, tend no t t o refer women t o firearms training, le t alon e provid e i t fo r them . Thu s self-defens e ha s a s ofte n a s no t developed outsid e th e contex t o f anti-sexua l assaul t organizations . Again , thi s is i n par t becaus e gende r ideolog y make s feminis t victi m preventio n service s seem to o radical . Bu t i t ha s als o becom e par t o f th e thinkin g an d practic e o f much feminis t activism . Feminist politics , lik e othe r form s o f resistance, hav e habituall y hel d u p th e broken bod y a s the wa y t o argu e tha t a set o f social arrangement s i s objectivel y wrong. Thi s ha s led feminist s t o constru e sexualit y i n quit e naturalized , apolit ical terms. The mora l inappropriatenes s o f rape i s often secure d with reference s to th e femal e bod y a s a sacre d place , an d b y implicitl y contrastin g consensua l sex a s apolitica l wit h force d se x a s a political , nonsexua l matte r o f violence . Additionally, muc h feminis t activis m an d teachin g t o educat e me n an d wome n about sexua l violenc e presuppos e th e ver y fictions o f sexe d embodimen t tha t fuel rap e culture . Finally , muc h feminis t discours e ha s maintaine d a centra l assumption o f bourgeoi s libera l individualism , namel y tha t th e bod y i s a n appendage o f the sel f subjected t o property right s (Dipros e 1994) . This assump tion turns the body into a n object rathe r than a n agent, thu s rendering women' s self-defense trainin g irrelevant, inconsequential , o r eve n antithetica l t o feminis t politics.

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Introduction:

The Challenge of the Self-Defense Movement

The anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t an d feminis t theor y coul d bette r chal lenge rap e cultur e a t its core. While knowin g "i n theory " tha t violenc e agains t women i s not natura l o r inevitable , w e hav e overlooke d th e potentia l o f train ing women t o figh t bac k an d have given al l the power t o sto p violence t o men . We hav e inadvertentl y preserve d a fundamental associatio n betwee n masculin ity an d violence . W e hav e no t adequatel y challenge d th e rap e myt h tha t me n rape becaus e o f siz e an d strength . No r hav e w e adequatel y conteste d th e dis tinction betwee n sexualit y an d politics , a distinctio n that , whil e definin g rap e as an unnatura l ac t roote d i n relation s o f social inequality, preserve s sexualit y as a "natural " essenc e fre e fro m powe r relations . Finally , w e hav e no t thoroughl y interrogated th e traditiona l distinctio n betwee n th e bod y an d consciousness . Self-defense a t its core challenge s what i t means to have a female body , wha t it means t o b e a man o r a woman. Self-defens e thu s offer s a critique o f the wa y gender is written int o ou r bodies. It transforms th e bodies we inhabi t an d henc e who w e are ; the meaning of sexuality; and the culture o f sexual violence agains t women. Th e self-defens e movemen t ca n be an impetus for feminist s t o reimag ine th e categorie s an d practices tha t defin e feminism . Feminis m mus t tak e seri ously the pleasure women gai n from combativ e bodily practices, and reconside r the primacy o f corporeality t o consciousness . I n short, feminis m mus t ge t physical. To understan d wh y self-defens e i s so transformative fo r women , an d s o dis ruptive o f th e embodie d etho s o f rap e culture , w e mus t firs t understan d ho w proper femininit y ha s exclude d aggression . Ove r th e cours e o f Nort h Ameri can history , wome n hav e bee n restricte d throug h code s o f feminin e manner s that ar e in large part bodily. Women n o longer hav e t o rid e sidesaddle, work i n long skirts , o r cavor t i n corsets . Ho w i s it tha t s o man y o f u s stil l don' t kno w how t o hit ?

1 Balls versus Ovarie s I Women's "Virtue" in Historical Perspective

"Sugar an d spic e an d everythin g nice , that's what girl s are made of . Frogs an d snail s an d pupp y do g tails , that' s wha t boy s ar e mad e of. " Institu tionalized version s o f this nursery rhym e abound . An d whil e suc h idea s declar e males an d female s t o be innatel y different , a rigid enforcemen t o f these suppos edly natura l difference s take s place a t all levels o f society. I n hi s hugely popula r Baby and Child Care, Dr. Spock , alon g with many other post-World Wa r I I par enting specialists , explicitl y instructe d parent s t o encourag e boy s t o b e aggres sive, cautionin g agains t turnin g the m int o "sissies " (Spoc k 1945) . Th e sam e expert tol d parent s t o discourag e girl s from hittin g an d othe r aggressiv e activi ties. Bu t i t i s not onl y socializatio n int o prope r gende r "roles " tha t encourage s men's aggressio n an d proscribe s women's . Aggression i s fastened t o th e real m o f the masculin e i n th e popula r imagina tion an d i n everyda y language . Fo r example , braver y an d courag e ar e mal e qualities. The wor d mettle is synonymous, i n Webster's thesaurus , no t onl y wit h courage an d bravery bu t als o wit h man an d manly. T w o entrie s describ e femal e mettle, Joan o f Arc an d Amazon—specifi c historica l figure s who , incidentally , are hardl y symbol s o f femininity . Ou r casua l tal k display s thi s sam e implici t understanding tha t courag e i s gendered : "You'v e go t balls. " Tha t t o "fuck " someone implie s a n aggressiv e violatio n i s evidenced b y th e meanin g o f insult s like "Fuc k you! " an d complaint s suc h a s " I go t fucke d b y th e I R S " (Benek e 1982). Losin g sport s team s ge t "reamed " b y thei r opponent s an d someon e unwilling t o submi t t o a n authorit y figur e refuse s t o "ben d over. " The cultura l connectio n betwee n aggressio n an d manhood , then , i s sexual ized. W e don't , afte r all , commen d someone' s manl y herois m wit h aphorism s like, "You'v e reall y got beard" o r "Man , you'v e go t a n Adam's apple. " And n o one ca n congratulate a woman fo r a n act of heroism with "You'v e go t ovaries. " In fact , women' s reproductiv e organ s hav e bee n invoke d historicall y t o justif y their exclusio n fro m aggressiv e sport s an d a number o f other prize d an d financially rewardin g socia l spheres .

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versus Ovaries

Of cours e it' s no w eas y t o se e throug h th e gende r ideolog y tha t ground s women's exclusio n fro m civi l life i n thei r reproductiv e organs . But man y peo ple still hold unexamine d belief s abou t th e differenc e betwee n mal e an d femal e bodies whic h mus t b e examine d i n orde r t o appreciat e th e radica l impac t o f women's self-defens e training . Gende r is the "knowledg e tha t establishes mean ing fo r bodil y difference " (Scot t 1988 , 2) . Gende r doe s no t sprin g innocentl y from ou r biolog y o r become adde d o n to p o f it; gender i s the syste m that orga nizes th e meanin g o f our biologica l bodies . Gender i s a discursiv e constructio n tha t produce s ou r knowledg e o f our selves as sexed individuals . Discours e i s a system o f signs, practices, statements , and text s acros s differen t socia l site s tha t construct s experienc e (se e Cannin g 1994; Foucaul t 1980 ; Terdima n 1985 ; Weedon 1987) . As a preassembled wa y to think , a discours e make s som e possibilitie s eas y t o imagin e an d other s impossible. While individua l agent s shape discourse , variou s cultura l represen tations and discourses help produce th e female an d th e male body a s such. Thi s chapter examine s ho w thos e discourse s discourag e women' s aggression , an d encourage men's , a t th e leve l o f fantasize d possibilit y an d a t th e leve l o f th e body.

Being a Normal, Feminine Lady In th e 1890s , U.S. social reformers sough t t o exclud e th e marrie d woma n fro m factory labo r o n th e ground s tha t distres s an d disorde r woul d result . Childre n would b e lef t unsupervise d an d me n woul d b e drive n t o pub s du e t o th e dirt y living quarter s resultin g fro m thei r wives ' absence . No t onl y woul d me n an d children suffer , i n thi s logic , bu t women' s bodie s woul d b e unabl e t o sustai n work wit h machine s (Cannin g 1994) . I n muc h th e sam e way , women' s entrance int o highe r educatio n wa s resiste d o n th e ground s tha t thei r uteruse s would b e damaged , a s though th e brai n an d th e uteru s demande d energ y fro m the sam e source , renderin g on e ineffectiv e b y th e us e o f the othe r (Ehrenreic h and English 1978 , 126). 1 This mythology suggest s that if we don' t ac t on th e se x differences tha t Go d o r nature gave us, we will jeopardize eithe r our ow n phys ical health o r th e large r socia l order . Many mal e commentator s o f th e Victoria n er a claime d tha t wome n reall y did hav e power, th e powe r t o "moraliz e thei r familie s an d thei r country " (Ga y 1993, 297) . Indeed, womanlines s wa s define d b y th e abilit y t o teac h purit y an d virtue. I f men ha d th e privileg e o f exercising authorit y i n public , women wer e to thin k tha t the y ha d an even greate r and worthier authorit y i n th e home. Th e

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lack of aggression define s a "lady"—she i s known fo r he r abilit y to handle a difficult situation , eve n a man' s aggression , withou t eve r gettin g aggressive , o r "rude," hersel f (Clark e 1993 , 397). Being recognize d a s morally superio r fo r one' s pacifis m an d kindness , how ever, grant s n o rea l socia l power . Mar y Dal y (1978 ) point s ou t tha t th e femi nine virtue s o f altruis m an d self-sacrific e ar e virtue s o f subservience . Sara h Hoagland (1988 , 83 ) suggest s tha t vulnerabilit y i s ye t anothe r suc h feminin e virtue, whic h include s nonreciproca l openness , loyalty , an d dependency . Jerrher Alle n (1986 , 39 ) note s tha t nonviolenc e i s also linked t o th e ideolog y o f heterosexual virtue : The ideolog y o f heterosexual virtu e form s th e cornerston e o f th e desig nation o f wome n a s nonviolent . Th e ideolog y o f heterosexua l virtu e charges wome n t o b e "moral, " virtuousl y nonviolen t i n th e fac e o f th e "political," violen t male-define d world . Th e ideolog y o f heterosexua l virtue entitle s men t o terrorize—to possess , humiliate, violate, and objec tify—women an d forecloses th e possibility o f women's activ e response t o men's sexua l terrorization . The pacifis m an d passivit y o f femininity , then , ar e par t an d parce l o f a syste m of compulsory heterosexuality . Women's fighting an d aggression hav e met th e same kind o f opposition tha t women's intellectua l an d public pursuits have , for th e sam e reasons. This i s not to sa y tha t wome n hav e no t aggressivel y fough t an d survived . Ther e hav e always been wome n wh o hav e worked har d an d fought i n wars. But the y wer e rarely suppose d t o d o s o officially, an d thes e action s certainl y calle d thei r fem ininity int o question . Wherea s me n fight a s men, an d ca n achiev e manhoo d i n doing so , Joan o f Ar c ha d t o fight i n drag—an d wa s ultimatel y execute d a s a witch, no t haile d a s a hero. Women' s fighting challenge s a fundamental asso ciation betwee n wome n an d goodness . Conside r th e followin g congressiona l testimony fro m retire d Marin e Corp s Commandant , Genera l Rober t H . Bar row (Jun e 1991 , quoted i n Blacksmit h 1992 , 26) : Exposure t o dange r is not combat . Bein g shot at , eve n being killed, i s not combat. Comba t i s finding . . . closing with . . . and killin g o r capturin g the enemy . It' s killing . An d it' s don e i n a n environmen t tha t i s ofte n a s difficult a s yo u ca n possibl y imagine . Extreme s o f climate . Brutality . Death. Dying . It' s . . . uncivilized! An d wome n can' t d o it ! No r shoul d they eve n b e though t o f a s doin g it . Th e requirement s fo r strengt h an d endurance rende r the m unabl e t o d o it. . . . Women giv e life. Sustai n life . Nurture life . The y don' t tak e it .

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Because men's aggressio n i s taken fo r grante d a s natural, women's seem s threat ening t o societ y i n a different way . Th e fea r tha t women' s rebellio n wil l caus e social lif e t o crumbl e stil l exists . Loo k a t men' s reaction s t o Thelma and Louise: They declare d th e film "fascist " an d "degradin g t o men " (Schicke l 1991 , 52) . Women ar e discursivel y positione d a s th e mora l conscienc e o f thei r families , communities, an d nations . Of course , wome n a s a grou p ar e fa r mor e diverse , an d a s individual s fa r more complex , tha n th e culturall y dominan t mode l fo r femal e identit y suggest s or allows . Bu t becaus e w e hav e construe d th e meanin g of female a s passivity , women's activitie s that fall outsid e th e dominan t imag e ge t construe d a s aggressive. A historica l perspectiv e reveal s tha t wome n wh o hav e deviate d fro m th e prescriptive feminin e nor m hav e hardl y bee n considere d wome n a t all.

Women's Deviance in Historical Perspective: Lesbian and Black Women As Aggressive Historically, girl s an d wome n hav e bee n considere d deviant s o r criminal s fo r behaving i n a variety o f ways legall y permitte d fo r males , fo r exampl e runnin g away fro m home . Willia m I . Thomas' s The Unadjusted Girl (1923) uncriticall y examines suc h girl s withou t questionin g wh y th e overwhelmin g "deviant " behaviors reporte d i n th e cas e notes ar e premarital sex, 2 prostitution, an d preg nancy. Thoma s (1923 , 109 ) admit s tha t delinquenc y i n girl s begin s wit h th e desire fo r "amusement , adventure , prett y clothes , favorabl e notice , distinction , freedom i n th e large r world, " hintin g tha t devianc e i n girl s wa s ofte n simpl y what wa s sociall y accepte d a s healthy i n boys . Cesare Lombroso (1911) , a criminologist notoriou s fo r his assertion tha t me n with specific , presumabl y les s evolved, physica l feature s wer e mor e likel y t o b e criminals, accounte d fo r women' s les s frequent crimina l activit y wit h referenc e to women' s "piety , maternity , wan t o f passion, sexua l coldness , weakness , an d an undevelope d intelligence " (Lombros o an d Ferrer o 1895 , iS 1)- Lombros o and Ferrer o sugges t tha t "femal e criminal s approximat e mor e t o male s . . . than to norma l women , especiall y i n th e superciliar y arche s i n th e sea m o f th e sutures, i n th e lowe r jaw-bones , an d i n peculiaritie s o f th e occipita l region " (ibid., 28) . So difficul t i s it t o conceiv e tha t wome n ar e no t innatel y passiv e tha t femal e deviants ar e construed a s biologically defective . Thes e explanation s o f women' s criminality o r lack thereo f presume tha t natura l sex differences exis t and explai n

Balls versus Ovaries |

2 3

behavior. Thes e theorie s d o no t explai n that , fo r instance , "runnin g away " an d "sexual misconduct " wer e crime s onl y girl s coul d commit . Devianc e i s a mat ter o f social definition . Socia l definition s ar e mor e interestin g tha n th e devian t individual. Fo r th e devian t statu s o f women' s aggressio n point s t o th e socia l structures tha t organiz e gende r an d aggression . It wa s no t onl y criminolog y o f th e tur n o f the centur y tha t positione d nat ural womanhoo d i n oppositio n t o aggression , whic h i t associate d wit h natura l manhood. Sexolog y an d psychoanalysi s di d a s well (se e Har t 1994 , 3-2 8 fo r a review). 3 Freud' s theorie s construe d wome n a s passive an d sa w th e gir l i n th e clitoral phas e o f sexual developmen t a s a "little man " (Freu d 1931 , in Strache y 1981, 151) . Sexologists studie d th e femal e "gende r invert " wh o wa s as active a s a heterosexua l ma n i n desirin g a woman. Mos t sexologist s wer e s o wedde d t o womanhood a s heterosexua l an d passiv e tha t the y construe d th e lesbia n a s a deviant, to o aggressiv e t o b e a "real" woman . The understandin g o f wome n a s virtuous , nonaggressiv e keeper s o f th e moral orde r explain s wh y lesbian s hav e historicall y bee n see n a s threatening t o civilized socia l organization (Chaunce y 1982-83 , 133) . "Civilization" i s config ured i n th e interest s o f dominan t me n whos e privileg e woul d b e unsettle d i f women rejecte d th e ideolog y o f heterosexua l virtue . Wha t ha s bee n s o upset ting t o peopl e abou t th e existenc e o f lesbians i s not tha t wome n ar e th e objec t of the lesbian's desir e per se , but th e masculine , aggressiv e form tha t suc h desir e connotes (Chaunce y 1982-83 , 119 ; Hart 1994 , 9) . I n othe r words , th e aggres siveness implied in her object choic e was what mad e the lesbian seem so devian t and dangerous . This i s the historica l connectio n tha t make s i t so easy to derid e a n aggressiv e woman a s a lesbian. Th e aggressiv e woma n i s threatening to , althoug h neces sary for, heterosexis t patriarchy ; relegatin g thi s figure t o a special category , les bian, makes her containabl e an d therefore usefu l (Har t 1994) . The displacemen t of criminalit y ont o lesbianis m help s retai n aggressio n a s a mal e preserve , a s i f aggression really were no t possible for women, a t least "real" women. I f the lesbian i s still though t o f as a "man " o r som e sor t o f gende r inver t (whethe r cre ated by a "perversion" o f nature o r culture) , the n th e "rea l woman" i s still het erosexual an d passive . In th e lat e nineteent h century , blac k women , lesbians , an d prostitute s wer e lumped int o on e devian t categor y (ibid. , 119-20) . "Ladylike " behavior s suc h a s physical delicac y were outsid e th e bounds o f possibility fo r blac k women—du e to lif e circumstance s i n a racis t societ y whic h mad e i t virtuall y impossibl e fo r them t o attai n thos e sign s o f successful womanhood . Th e idea l o f the helpless , corseted woma n s o weak an d s o wealthy tha t sh e retire d t o th e faintin g couc h

24 I

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for a spell wa s no t a real optio n fo r blac k wome n wh o di d heav y manua l labo r and othe r wor k outsid e thei r homes . Blac k wome n wer e no t suppose d t o devote tim e t o thei r families ; white s blame d cro p failure s o n just suc h inappro priate blac k femal e behaviors . Bu t a t anothe r level , al l wome n wer e hel d accountable t o th e dominan t standar d o f femininity. Henc e blac k women , lik e lesbians, hav e bee n construe d a s failed women . That blac k women' s socia l positio n mad e th e attainmen t o f th e feminin e ideal practicall y impossibl e di d no t fre e the m fro m thei r ow n for m o f seques tration. Durin g Reconstruction , th e threa t o f rap e b y whit e me n mad e publi c appearances dangerou s fo r blac k women , henc e blac k men becam e thei r link t o economic an d politica l sphere s (Davi s 1983) . Thes e conditions , differen t fro m those cloisterin g whit e women , solidifie d blac k women' s distanc e fro m publi c life an d th e mobilit y i t implied . If a black woma n wa s sexually assaulted , n o on e wit h politica l authorit y care d or side d with he r i f she defended hersel f against th e assailant . Black wome n wer e positioned a s property t o whit e men—no t th e kin d o f propert y whit e wome n were, which was valuable and virtuous, but a s workers an d as sexually exploitabl e property. Thei r sexualit y bein g see n a s les s civilize d an d refine d tha n whit e women's, black women wer e judged a s either sexless "mammies" or sexually disrespectable "Jezebels. " Th e stereotyp e o f th e mamm y represent s th e idea l o f unconditional lov e an d nurturance , a n imag e tha t rationalize d blac k women' s oppression b y representin g the m a s happily concerne d wit h th e need s o f whit e people (hook s 1981 , 41-45). This image o f selfless nurturer wa s different fro m th e icon o f white femal e nurturance , bu t i t was nurturanc e an d maternalis m just th e same, thereby excludin g aggression . The stereotyp e o f th e Jezebel mad e blac k wome n appea r sexuall y invitin g and alway s availabl e t o satisf y men , whic h reinforce d whit e men' s rea l sexua l access t o blac k women . Rathe r tha n bein g see n a s sexuall y virtuous , blac k women wer e see n a s sexually voracious . Thi s di d no t offe r som e sor t o f socia l freedom; t o th e contrary , i t rationalize d sexua l assault s agains t blac k women . Moreover, blac k wome n hav e bee n evaluate d accordin g t o th e ideal s o f femi nine virtue an d passivity, and women o f color more generall y have served as the contrasting "others " agains t whic h whit e wome n coul d measur e themselves . The legac y o f slaver y i s stil l wit h us , a s evidenced b y th e greate r degre e o f media coverag e tha t assault s on whit e wome n receive . And stil l today, wherea s white wome n ar e presumed virtuou s unti l proven otherwise , blac k wome n ar e presumed t o b e ba d an d mus t prov e otherwise . Thu s whil e th e standin g a s a lady ha s been a naturalized dominan t idea l agains t whic h al l women hav e bee n judged, i t wa s attainabl e onl y fo r middle - an d upper-middle-clas s whit e het -

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erosexual women. Moreover , regardles s of the actua l appearance o r behavior o f lesbians an d blac k women , stereotype s abou t the m mak e i t virtually impossibl e for the m t o mee t th e idea l i n homophobi c an d racis t imaginations . Though i t ma y see m obviou s wha t a woma n is , wha t a ma n is , an d wha t aggression is , ou r "knowledge " abou t thes e categorie s i s sociall y constructed . Aggression i s a n ideologica l categor y centra l t o rap e culture , wit h n o distinc t definition. Wome n wh o ste p ou t o f line ar e perceived a s aggressive. Th e puta tive naturalnes s o f th e idea l connectin g passivit y wit h wome n an d aggressio n with me n justifie s holdin g th e idea l a s a standar d agains t whic h t o measur e women an d men . Bu t eve n th e categorie s "woman " an d "man " ar e ideologi cal, constructe d throug h a cultural meanin g system . Se x differenc e reall y isn' t a simple matte r o f balls versus ovaries .

The Social Production of Sex Differences Cultural authorities—scientific , medical , an d religious—hav e fo r age s sai d tha t humans com e i n tw o sexe s wit h complementar y natures : Me n ar e stron g an d aggressive, an d wome n ar e wea k an d passive . W e lear n t o asses s al l o f ou r actions i n term s o f ideals o f sex an d b y doin g s o maintai n "rea l manhood " an d "real womanhood " (Ber n 1993) . Moreover, th e commitmen t t o heterosexual ity a s a privileged institutio n an d identit y make s ma n an d woma n see m lik e a natural an d inevitabl e pai r (Dworki n 1974 ; Butler 1990) . The myt h o f the inte rior origin s o f gende r foreclose s o r explain s a s deviant variou s form s o f gende r dissonance, suc h a s female aggression , o r fo r tha t matter , mal e pacifis m (Butle r 1990, 1993) . To th e exten t tha t me n fail , consciousl y o r not , t o develo p strengt h i n thei r bodies, t o disrespec t women , an d t o pursu e sexua l intercours e wit h them , the y fail at heterosexual masculinity . Other s ca n derogate such men a s "sissies," "pussy whipped," an d "faggots, " respectively . T o th e exten t tha t women choose , o r ar e forced b y economi c necessity , t o b e strong , assertive , o r emotionall y o r sexuall y unavailable t o men , the y fai l a t heterosexua l femininit y an d ma y b e labele d "dykes," "castratin g bitches," o r simply "crazy. " Nobod y actuall y lives up t o th e purest ideals of womanhood an d manhood; bu t thos e are the ideals against whic h we judge ourselve s and others . The point , then , i s not tha t heterosexism , racism , and rap e cultur e determin e sexe d embodimen t perfecdy , completely , o r perma nently. I t i s that thes e ar e idealize d norm s agains t whic h individual s ar e judged. These norm s make th e female bod y see m complementar y t o th e male body, an d make heterosexualit y compulsory .

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Feminists hav e argue d tha t se x inequality , an d rap e specifically , occur s no t because wome n ar e differen t fro m men , bu t becaus e se x itsel f ha s bee n mad e into a social differenc e o f profound importanc e an d thu s th e basi s upo n whic h inequalities res t (MacKinno n 1989 ; Gaten s 1996) . Rap e i s no t a resul t o f an y "natural" sexuality . Women' s sexua l availabilit y t o me n i s in par t wha t define s womanhood. I f sex itsel f i s no t a natura l differenc e bu t a sociall y constitute d one, the n gende r an d gende r inequalit y ar e no t result s o r expression s o f bio logical sex assignment, a matter o f balls vs. ovaries. Rather, gende r i s a political fiction o f differenc e whic h itsel f produce s th e ide a o f anatomicall y differenti ated bodies . There i s no original , presocia l difference , "sex, " whic h the n get s translate d into socia l differences . I n a chicke n an d eg g reversa l o f profound importance , our popula r ideal s o f gende r actuall y produc e th e idea l o f natura l sex . Gende r is a cultura l fictio n tha t produce s sex a s it s (imaginary ) natura l origi n (Butle r !993> 93)- This is not t o say that cultura l assumptions suppl y hal f the populatio n with balls, but i t is to say that cultura l assumptions make having balls mean wha t it does . Were i t no t fo r ou r cultura l assumptions , havin g balls would no t impl y membership i n a category o f persons; no r woul d i t impl y anythin g abou t wha t kind o f personality on e has, what kin d o f sex one likes or "needs " to have, wha t kind o f work on e i s capable o f performing, an d s o on . The criteri a fo r wha t make s a body mal e o r femal e hav e change d throug h time. Althoug h w e ma y tak e fo r grante d toda y tha t th e presenc e o r absenc e o f a properly size d and functioning peni s is a natural marker o f sex, it once was th e presence o r absenc e o f ovarie s tha t indicate d se x classificatio n (Kessle r 1990) . The knowledg e w e hav e abou t sexe d bodie s i s a value-lade n knowledg e informed b y an d solidifyin g th e powe r inequalitie s betwee n me n an d women . There i s no ahistorica l bod y prio r t o a power/knowledge syste m tha t institute s the body a s an object (Dipros e 1994) . Power influence s th e knowledge w e hav e about bodie s and , sinc e w e liv e ou t knowledge , constitute s th e kind s o f bodie s or subject s w e become . The patriarcha l powe r syste m affectin g ou r knowledg e o f male an d femal e bodies position s wome n a s inferio r t o men . A s Elizabet h Gros z (1994 , 14 ) notes: Instead o f granting wome n a n autonomou s an d activ e for m o f corporea l specificity, a t bes t women' s bodie s ar e judge d i n term s o f a "natura l inequality," a s if there wer e a standard o r measur e fo r th e valu e o f bod ies independent o f sex. I n othe r words , women' s corporea l specificit y i s used t o explai n an d justify th e differen t (read : unequal ) socia l position s and cognitiv e abilitie s o f the tw o sexes . By implication , women' s bodie s

Balls ven ; Ovaries | 2 7 are presumed t o be incapable of men's achievements , being weaker, mor e prone t o (hormonal ) irregularities , intrusions , an d unpredictabilities . The universalisti c stanc e o f scientific discours e conflate s th e masculin e wit h the human , thereb y confinin g th e feminin e t o a secondar y positio n tha t i s devalued compare d t o th e primar y position . Thi s dualisti c mod e o f thinkin g creates binary difference s an d rationalize s a hierarchical scal e of power relation s (Braidotti 1994 , 154) . Th e scientifi c discours e o f biology doe s no t giv e u s th e "truth" o f sex . Scientist s don' t merel y notic e se x difference s an d repor t thei r findings. Scientist s choos e t o stud y se x differences , fundin g agencie s choos e t o fund suc h studies, and the studies often reflec t preconceive d notion s abou t sex. 4 Contrary t o th e popular notio n tha t "seein g is believing," quit e ofte n th e belie f in sex actually make s u s see it (Lorbe r 1993) . Scientists didn' t simpl y com e alon g an d discove r th e passivit y o f females . The ideolog y o f male activit y an d aggressio n an d femal e passivit y an d vulnera bility i s the produc t o f scientist s who , lik e everyon e else , wer e responsibl e fo r judging thei r behavio r an d idea s in term s o f the gende r ideal s of their day . Sci entists work wit h th e ideologies available to them , suc h a s the teachings of Aristotle, wh o suggeste d tha t "female " i s passive an d absen t whil e "male " i s activ e and present . Th e masculin e represent s wha t i s valued whil e th e feminin e rep resents the "other " an d what i s devalued. Thus , for example , scientists call some E. colx bacteri a mal e an d other s femal e simpl y becaus e on e strai n o f E. coli cells contains F plasmi d an d ca n transfe r gene s int o th e cell s whic h lac k F plasmid . Predictably, th e one s whic h lac k F plasmi d an d receiv e i t ar e calle d femal e (Spanier 1995 , 56-58) . Similarly , scientist s hav e bee n unabl e t o imagin e an d describe th e proces s o f fertilization a s anything othe r tha n a n aggressive , com petitive sper m fightin g it s way t o a passive egg-in-waiting—a t leas t unti l femi nist critic s lik e Emil y Marti n (1992 ) suggeste d tha t sper m ar e actuall y terribl e swimmers an d must be sucke d i n by a decidedly nonpassiv e egg . Scientists hav e instead imagine d an d describe d a heterosexua l romanc e stor y wit h th e sper m and eg g (Marti n 1991) . Heterosexual norms , then , ar e officiall y prescribe d throug h scientific , med ical, legal , an d psychologica l discourses . Whil e construin g thei r concer n wit h gender a s an innocent matte r o f scientific truth—th e prope r translatio n o f biology int o identity , sex int o gender—thes e discourse s actuall y produc e th e ide a of sex, tha t is , of natural differenc e underlyin g gender . Suc h ideationa l config urations hav e bee n instrumenta l i n drawin g officia l boundarie s o f proper mal e and femal e behavior , a s they distinguis h th e san e versu s th e insane , th e health y versus th e sick , th e natura l versu s th e perverted . The y hav e frame d men' s het -

28 I

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erosexual predatio n a s healthy , excep t i n case s o f extrem e violenc e o r blac k male predatio n o n whit e wome n (rea l o r imagined) . Thes e discourse s hav e framed a s derange d women' s behavior s tha t see m t o challeng e heterosexua l norms an d th e naturalize d gende r polarity . Popular conception s o f natural masculinit y an d femininit y suppor t rap e cul ture. Thes e fictions ar e not simpl y beliefs , attitudes , o r role s we decid e t o play . They actuall y produc e bodil y disposition s tha t mak e heterosexua l intercours e compelling an d physica l coercio n fairl y eas y fo r me n t o accomplish . Mal e an d female bodie s ar e no t given . Social/mora l code s d o no t just govern , say , ho w men trea t women (an d vice versa). They constitut e th e embodie d etho s of me n and women; the y govern what i t means, in any given historical era , to be a man and t o b e a woman . The poin t i s no t tha t al l o f ou r idea s abou t bodie s ar e sociall y constructe d and therefor e immateria l o r inconsequential . Rather , th e traditiona l associatio n between th e mal e bod y an d aggressivity , o n th e on e hand , an d betwee n th e female bod y an d violability , o n th e other , ar e matter s o f history an d culture — with significan t historica l effects . S o long a s gender i s a fiction tha t inform s ou r understanding o f and livin g o f ou r bodies , gende r inform s action . Mal e domi nance demand s certai n specifi c bodil y investments . Rap e cultur e become s a n embodied ethos .

Masculinity and Rape Culture It i s a common misperceptio n tha t rap e i s a large par t o f women' s experienc e but no t men's . Me n d o hav e a n experienc e o f rape—far to o ofte n a s rapists— but the y rarel y thin k o f it a s rape, o r a s violence. Rap e i s sex without consent . But me n wh o rap e ofte n se e it a s sex, an d a s natural a t tha t (MacKinno n 1989 ; Scully 1990) . T o b e sure , ther e ar e me n wh o ac t violently , sexuall y an d non sexually, towar d othe r men . Bu t thos e acts of violence ar e often clea r to al l participants as violent, whil e rap e ca n ofte n b e construe d a s a man' s "natura l instincts" respondin g t o a woman whos e appearance , behavior , o r reputatio n "invited" it . Many han g o n t o th e vie w tha t me n ar e naturall y predatory . Believ e i t o r not, feminist s hav e alway s give n me n mor e credi t tha n this . Feminist s sugges t that rap e i s a learned behavio r tha t i s mythologized a s a drive roote d i n natura l sex differences . I n popular Nort h America n cultura l logic , th e practic e o f rape , even i f regrettable, i s caused o r enable d b y som e sor t o f primal mal e advantag e and femal e disadvantage .

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But rape does not depen d upo n superio r size or strength; it depends o n a fantasy of them. Thi s fantas y i s what allow s me n t o believ e i n thei r abilitie s an d t o see women a s appropriate target s for abuse . This fantasy als o encourages wome n to believ e tha t thei r effort s t o fight a n attacke r woul d b e futile : A rapist's ability to accost a woman verbally , to demand he r attention, an d even t o attac k he r physicall y depend s mor e o n ho w h e position s himsel f relative t o he r sociall y tha n i t doe s o n hi s allegedl y superio r physica l strength. Hi s belief that h e ha s mor e strengt h tha n a woman an d tha t h e can us e i t t o rap e he r merit s mor e analysi s tha n th e putativ e fac t o f tha t strength, becaus e tha t belie f ofte n produce s a s an effec t th e mal e powe r that appear s t o b e rape' s cause . (Marcu s 1992 , 390 ) Although ou r cultura l imaginatio n construe s rapist s a s physically overpowerin g women, me n nee d no t b e particularl y aggressive , strong , o r physicall y violen t to accomplish rape . Men ma y need t o believe that they have the physical powe r with whic h t o carr y o n aroun d wome n i n way s tha t barel y conside r women' s desires. Indeed , th e respec t wit h whic h me n approac h othe r me n surel y ha s something t o d o wit h th e sens e tha t ther e ar e consequence s fo r treatin g a ma n disrespectfully. Popular belief s i n th e physica l superiorit y o f me n an d th e passivit y o f women, then , underli e th e genera l practic e o f rape . Thi s i s wha t make s mal e power "th e myt h tha t make s itsel f true " (MacKinno n 1989 , 104) . Mal e supremacy need s biologism t o sustai n itself . Hence feminist s hav e criticize d th e celebration o f mythi c mal e physica l strengt h an d femal e weaknes s a s a centra l tenet o f male supremacy : The righ t t o physica l strengt h a s power, i n a male-supremacis t system , i s vouchsafed t o men . [One ] tene t o f male supremac y i s that me n ar e physi cally stronger than women and , fo r tha t reason , hav e dominion ove r them . Physical strengt h i n wome n tha t i s no t direcd y harnesse d t o "women' s work" become s a n abomination , an d it s use against men , tha t is , as power, is anathema , forbidden , horribl y punished . Th e realit y o f mal e physica l strength i n a n absolut e sens e is less important tha n th e ideolog y tha t sacral izes and celebrate s it . I n part , th e physica l strengt h o f men ove r wome n i s realized because men keep women physicall y weak. (Dworki n 1979 , 14-15 ) Popular belief s abou t th e meanin g o f huma n bod y part s als o fue l rap e cul ture. Women' s bodie s ar e positione d culturall y a s space s t o b e invade d whil e men's ar e positione d culturall y a s impenetrabl e invaders . (Whe n referrin g t o penis-vagina intercourse , w e sa y "penetration, " no t "envelopment." ) Hence ,

30 |

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another myt h o f mal e supremac y i s th e ide a "tha t sexua l powe r authenticall y originates i n th e penis . Masculinity i n action , narrowl y i n th e ac t o f sex as me n define i t o r mor e widel y i n an y ac t o f taking , i s sexua l powe r fulfillin g itself , being tru e t o it s ow n nature " (Dworki n 1979 , 24). 5 I f men' s sens e o f socia l superiority feel s real , physical , an d visceral , throug h thei r sexua l organs , an d their potentia l fo r physica l aggressio n i s celebrate d a s natural , the n clearl y w e have a recipe fo r th e sustenanc e o f a rape cultur e tha t produce s it s ow n legiti mation. The commonsens e understandin g o f the locatio n o f a man's sens e o f self (a man's peni s i s referred t o a s his "manhood") , an d it s implicit misrecognitio n a s a natura l fact , i s reinforced i n childhoo d socialization , mainstrea m media , an d mainstream pornography—althoug h neve r absolutely . Thu s th e perpetual nee d to enac t ritual s o f manhood, suc h a s heterosexual intercours e (whethe r force d or consensual) , thereb y providin g corporea l reassuranc e tha t manhoo d i s nat ural afte r all . A man' s nee d t o have a sex (tha t is , a n identit y a s a man) s o per fectly coincide s wit h a need t o have sex that i t appear s t o b e grounde d i n som e sort o f natural biologica l "drive " (Stoltenber g 1989) . But "provin g one' s man hood" i s reall y mor e abou t establishin g it . Howeve r muc h som e me n woul d like t o thin k tha t the y belon g t o a preexisting, precultura l se x categor y tha t ha s certain properties , namel y a n essentia l nee d fo r heterosexua l contac t wit h cer tain wome n an d a n aggressiv e impuls e t o ge t tha t contact , thos e feeling s (how ever authentic ) ar e th e embodie d etho s o f rap e culture . Tha t manhoo d feel s real, an d tha t me n fee l driven , onl y exemplifie s th e corporea l manifestatio n o f the cultura l ethos . Heterosexual intercours e i s thu s crucia l fo r solidifyin g a sens e o f onesel f a s belonging t o a naturall y existin g categor y o f manhood . Thus , sex , whethe r forced o r consensual, ofte n solidifie s fo r men a sense of natural sex differences. I f such a fantasy o f difference i s necessary for a confirmation o f privileged identity , then sexua l activity , specificall y intercourse , migh t becom e s o compellin g tha t women's interes t in it is either irrelevant o r taken for grante d as part of their nat ural makeup . I n thi s light , sexua l assault s ar e no t conscious attempt s t o kee p women dow n but , quit e literally , boy s tryin g t o b e boys . Our understandin g o f masculinity goe s hand i n han d wit h a n understandin g of th e mal e bod y a s impenetrabl e an d invulnerable . Whe n me n desir e t o b e penetrated, the y ar e see n a s "perverted. " Whe n me n ar e raped , almos t alway s by othe r me n (i n prison, fo r instance) , the ac t is understood a s a violation. Tha t such a n ac t i s seen a s "making a woman" ou t o f them als o shows ho w th e het erosexist norm s o f ou r cultur e intertwin e marker s o f se x an d aggression . W e could conceivably—bu t d o not—liv e i n a culture i n whic h wome n fondl e an d

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penetrate drun k me n i n bar s an d a t parties , o r i n whic h arme d wome n assaul t men o n th e street s an d i n thei r homes . I t is a matter o f culture, no t nature , tha t we live in a world o f primarily male heterosexual predation. I t is a matter of culture tha t w e eve n hav e a categor y o f person s know n a s "men, " wit h bodie s understood a s impenetrable . The statement , "rap e is about violence, not sex " has often misle d people int o thinking tha t whe n me n rap e women , the y d o s o knowin g th e differenc e between consensua l se x and felon y rape , knowin g tha t wome n experienc e i t as oppressive, an d knowin g tha t the y ar e violatin g o r dominatin g women . Bu t that statemen t wa s neve r mean t t o captur e th e assailant' s experienc e o f th e event. I t wa s mean t t o captur e th e victim' s experienc e o f rape, an d t o counte r the misconceptio n tha t me n rap e ou t o f some unstoppabl e se x "drive, " exem plified b y Camill e Paglia' s declaratio n tha t "hunt , pursui t an d captur e ar e bio logically programme d int o mal e sexuality " (1992 , 51) . A ma n ma y ver y wel l experienc e rapin g a s a sexual act ; bu t eve n i f he does , sexual aggressio n i s not natural , no r i s it eroti c fo r hi s victim . I n a situation o f rape, th e ma n an d th e woma n d o no t hav e th e sam e experienc e o f the event — that is the problem. Littl e compel s me n t o se e such encounter s i n th e sam e wa y that women d o (Scull y 1990) . Men wh o rap e d o no t necessaril y inten d t o rape ; they intend t o hav e sex. That a woman doe s not wan t sexua l intercourse, sadly , seems eithe r irrelevan t t o a ma n wh o rape s o r relevan t t o hi m bu t arrogantl y misconstrued a s desire (ibid.) . Men ma y kno w tha t a woman i n a short skir t isn' t a n invitatio n t o rape ; bu t some thin k it' s a n invitatio n t o hav e sex—th e proble m bein g tha t to o man y men constru e se x as not-rape becaus e a woman di d thi s or that (indicator s othe r than saying "I wan t t o d o this with you"). Men ten d no t t o clai m that men wh o wear shorts with n o shirts , stand nake d in locker room showers , or dress in tigh t jeans ar e leadin g anyon e o n o r "askin g fo r it. " W e d o no t ten d t o regar d me n as violabl e being s i n th e sam e way ; no r d o w e se e me n a s vulnerabl e t o o r deserving o f sex for whic h the y hav e n o interest . Many imprisone d rapist s admi t t o havin g ha d se x but insis t tha t i t was con sensual o r otherwis e O K an d no t rap e (ibid.) . This , grievously , include s me n who brok e int o th e home s o f women an d rape d the m a t knif e point . I t i s no t difficult t o imagin e tha t i f eve n rapist s wh o committe d suc h extrem e an d obvious felonie s d o no t se e thei r actio n fro m thei r victim' s perspective , th e men wh o rap e thei r date s an d acquaintance s unde r mor e everyda y circum stances d o no t necessaril y understan d themselve s t o hav e harme d someon e either. Som e o f thes e me n ca n b e s o ignoran t tha t the y cal l thei r victim s t o ask fo r anothe r date , or , whe n confronte d b y thei r victims , justif y thei r

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behavior b y insistin g tha t th e victi m di d no t hav e a goo d enoug h reaso n t o refuse th e sex . Rapists aren' t th e onl y one s wh o don' t ge t it . Man y peopl e blam e th e vic tim o r otherwis e excus e th e rapist' s behavior. Rapist s ge t thei r excuse s an d justifications fro m th e cultur e i n whic h the y live . Ther e i s a societywide predis position t o minimiz e th e culpabilit y o f me n wh o rape . Henc e me n wh o rap e are less social deviants than they are conformists (Frank s 1985) . The discrepanc y of opinion ove r when a woman i s allowed to determine whether o r not sh e will have sex, and therefore whethe r o r not what sh e experiences is rape, is precisely why feminist s fough t t o mak e marita l rap e illegal . Prio r t o that , an y se x a ma n had wit h hi s wif e wa s treate d a s inherentl y consensua l i n th e law . Feminist s sought t o redefin e a s rape acts o f force d se x tha t man y insiste d were—simpl y because o f th e relationshi p betwee n th e peopl e involved—consensual . H o w women ar e define d vis-a-vi s me n make s a significant impac t o n th e likelihoo d that a given ac t wil l b e see n a s legitimate. Whe n wome n wer e stil l considere d to b e thei r husbands ' property , i t wa s nearl y impossibl e fo r mos t peopl e t o understand tha t wome n coul d b e rape d b y thei r husbands . Over tw o decade s ago , th e anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t emphasize d th e violation a t th e hear t o f women's experienc e o f rape ; the y di d s o specificall y to denaturaliz e rape . Th e movemen t als o emphasize d rap e a s a violent crim e so tha t thei r nee d fo r stat e fundin g o f rap e crisi s center s an d ho t line s woul d be see n a s legitimate (Matthew s 1994 , 151-61) . Framin g rap e a s violent rathe r than sexua l als o helpe d challeng e som e sexis t aspect s i n an d surroundin g rap e law. Fo r instance , i t helpe d overcom e th e proble m o f marita l exceptio n t o rape law, reliev e th e stigm a o f being a rape victi m an d increas e women' s like lihood t o repor t rape , an d reduc e th e media' s interes t i n th e victim' s sexua l history an d attir e (Dumares q 1981 , 49-50) . Bu t thi s emphasi s ha s tende d t o separate sexualit y fro m violenc e falsely , thereb y naturalizin g consensua l het erosexuality a s i t denaturalize d rape . Som e no w tak e th e statemen t "rap e i s about violence , no t sex " t o mea n tha t rap e i s a n ac t o f violenc e perpetrate d by a psychotic individua l wit h violen t intentions , opposin g i t t o a freely cho sen natura l sexua l ac t i n whic h n o powe r inequalit y o r feelin g o f dominanc e is present . The clai m that men rap e in order to dominate turn s rape into an act that me n presumably conduc t consciousl y (a s if all rapists knew thei r victims do no t wan t it) as some sort of oppressive tacti c to ensure male political privilege. Moreover , the clai m tha t force d intercours e give s the ma n a feeling o f dominance tend s t o ignore the ways in which consensua l heterosexual intercours e ca n also give me n a feeling o f dominance (MacKinno n 1989 ; Plummer 1984 ; Rich 1980 ; Stolten -

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berg 1989) . A widesprea d popula r misperceptio n o f radical feminis t argument s about sexualit y an d powe r i s that the y clai m al l sex is rape. Thi s misperceptio n may stem from th e inability t o conceiv e o f the mor e subtl e point feminist s hav e made: that fo r som e men th e psychic reward s (e.g. , a sense of masculinity, viril ity, pleasure, and domination) o f consensual se x may be n o differen t fro m thos e of forced sex . Feminis m doe s no t castigat e al l heterosexua l se x a s nefarious o r unlawful, then , bu t question s th e abilit y t o separat e sexualit y from th e powe r relations wit h whic h i t i s bound up . Heterosexual mal e aesthetic s involv e al l th e thing s tha t perpetuat e strengt h and invulnerability. Masculinit y is socially conceived in ways that support men' s participation i n sports , developmen t o f thei r physica l capabilities , an d trainin g with firearm s (Messne r 1990 , 1994 ; Gibso n 1994) . Suc h activitie s rende r me n more, no t less , masculine. It' s no t "manly " t o b e servile , soft , small , o r vulner able. It' s no t "manly " t o b e to o concerne d abou t one' s appearanc e o r attrac tiveness, a s it's no t manl y t o hav e one' s bod y looke d at , penetrated , o r taken . These things , i n th e popula r imagination , represen t femininity . I t i s to th e cul tural cultivatio n an d appreciatio n o f feminin e passivit y i n wome n tha t I no w turn.

Femininity and Rape Culture The ol d saying, "I t take s work t o be a woman" reveal s the effort s wome n mus t exert t o styliz e thei r bodie s i n way s tha t ar e considere d appropriatel y feminine . Indeed wome n ma y b e keenl y awar e tha t th e bod y i s invested wit h dail y time and money-consumin g practice s involvin g diet , exercise , clothing , makeup , hair an d bod y cosmetics , accessorie s o f adornment , posture , gait , attitude , an d even surgery . Femininit y doe s no t com e "naturally. " Wome n ar e rewarde d psychologically an d materially for cultivatin g physical difference fro m men , an d not just an y difference . Feminine manner s an d attractivenes s requir e a concern fo r th e need s o f oth ers, a degree o f pleasantness t o whic h w e d o no t hol d me n accountabl e (Clin e and Spende r 1987) , an d a cultivate d inabilit y t o defen d mora l an d physica l boundaries (MacKinno n 1989) . Being looke d a t (rathe r tha n lookin g a t others ) and withholdin g one' s strengt h hel p mak e u p femininit y (MacKinno n 1987 ; Young 1990) . Wome n lear n t o b e nic e an d deferentia l t o men , occupyin g a number o f persona l an d professiona l role s tha t deman d suc h a n abilit y (Hochschild 1983) . Secretarial work , domesti c work , waitressing , fligh t attend ing, nursing , chil d care , homemaking , an d hookin g implicid y an d explicitl y

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require feminin e deferenc e an d cheerfulnes s i n servin g others . Feminin e man ners ar e anythin g bu t aggressive ; i n fact , feminin e manner s ar e precisel y th e opposite. Women displa y deference t o men ou t o f economic necessity , for fear of con sequences, an d sometime s simpl y ou t o f habi t i n a numbe r o f situation s tha t men exploit . Wome n ar e taugh t that , i n orde r t o b e like d b y a man, the y mus t reflect hi m i n larger-than-lif e ways . Women' s magazine s ar e a n ever-presen t source o f suc h directives . On e gir l recall s wha t sh e learne d from them : " I remember readin g that girls should let boys do all the talking. Smile and say nice things t o a boy, clich e thing s . . . like, 'Michael , wha t bi g muscle s yo u have! ' . . . I was supposed t o si t an d liste n an d smil e a t everythin g H E said , an d neve r be bore d o r loo k bored " (Szekel y 1988 , 92). Femininity require s appearanc e a s wel l a s demeanor . Wome n styliz e thei r bodies i n a predictable manner : i n term s o f vulnerability (hig h heel s creat e it) ; smallness (dietin g and, failing that, girdles help produce it) ; and feminine attrac tiveness, which i s sexual availability to men (dressin g in whatever style s are cur rent "tur n ons " indicate s it) . Thi s bod y work , whethe r wome n tak e i t fo r granted, enjo y it , fee l rewarde d fo r it , resen t it , rejec t it , o r fee l obligate d t o d o it, serve s as a reminder t o women tha t gender i s a physical appearanc e tha t doe s not simpl y flow fro m th e hormone s an d ooz e ou t th e pores . Femininity i s a practice an d socia l for m o f consciousness tha t no t onl y dif ferentiates wome n bu t signal s thei r subordinat e positio n i n a huma n hierar chy. A s a n aestheticize d appearance , hegemoni c femininit y render s gende r inequality sensual , erotic , an d attractive . W o m e n ar e expecte d t o engag e i n a whole hos t o f activities for other s tha t men woul d no t a s readily do : look nice , smell nice , fee l nice , smil e nice , smil e more , liste n well , tal k softly , tal k sweetly, b e polite , an d pleas e others . Simultaneously , wome n ar e expecte d t o avoid thos e thing s tha t wil l mak e the m messy , sweaty , bruised , dirty , o r larg e (Wolf 1991) . Of cours e som e woul d hav e u s thin k tha t man y men' s intens e appreciatio n of women' s femininit y indicate s tha t wome n actuall y hav e powe r ove r men . After all , suc h wome n ar e "drop-dea d gorgeous, " "stunning, " "blon d bomb shells," and of course "rea l knockouts." The "power " tha t feminine beaut y an d manners offer , however , doesn' t ge t wome n ver y far . Feminin e manner s ar e not stron g o r respectable , fierce o r heroic . They'r e no t intelligen t an d forth right, determine d o r assertive . An d whil e a feminin e woma n shoul d tak e a man's breat h away , sh e should no t really be abl e t o knoc k hi m out . I f a woma n has an y rea l institutional , physical , o r politica l power , sh e i s ofte n considere d aggressive an d unattractive .

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That femininit y i s define d i n term s tha t rationaliz e women' s subordinatio n to me n explain s th e stereotyp e o f th e ugl y feminist . Aestheti c evaluation s o f what i s sexy revolve aroun d mal e dominanc e an d femal e subordination . Henc e a feminis t mus t b e ugly , angry , militant , ball-busting , an d man-hating , whil e wife beater s (female-bashers , quit e literally ) an d rapist s (militan t i n thei r desir e for sex ) ar e seldo m calle d woman-haters . Our aesthetic s ar e no t innocen t persona l preference s outsid e o f powe r rela tions. In art, women hav e been sexuall y provocative object s for th e male voyeur . Femininity include s a distinctivel y textua l dimension , whereb y femininit y a s a social consciousnes s i s produce d throug h writing , painting , television , an d fil m (Smith 1988 , 38). Such discourses of gender provide fantasies of what women an d men ca n be . Thes e fantasie s i n tur n affec t ou r self-perception s an d bodil y com portments. Fil m serve s a s a primary mean s o f glamorizing women' s helplessnes s and men' s heroism . Usually , thes e tw o fantasie s ar e interdependent : Wh o doe s the her o sav e but a helpless woman? Whos e deat h o r rap e doe s he avenge ? W h o loves him i n th e en d a s her best protector ? Men i n films ar e th e active , heroi c protagonist s wh o mak e thing s happen , often becaus e o f the love or fear tha t the beautiful woman , th e appealing object , inspires i n hi m (Mulve y 1989 , 19-20) . Th e ideal s o f womanhoo d involv e beauty, no t acts of heroism a s ideals of manhood do . As Naomi Wol f (1991 , 59 ) points out , " A beautifu l heroin e i s a contradictio n i n terms , sinc e herois m i s about individuality , interestin g an d eve r changing , whil e 'beauty ' i s generic , boring, an d inert. " W e ar e inundate d b y portrayal s o f beautifu l youn g whit e women save d (an d the n late r ravished ) b y heroi c mal e crime-stoppers , whil e the revers e i s practically unhear d of . Feminist s hav e pointe d ou t tha t represen tations o f wome n i n popula r cultur e reflec t mal e fantasie s an d anxietie s mor e than women' s realitie s o r fantasie s (Mulve y 1989 , xiii). Women's sexua l complianc e i s a commo n fantasize d imag e i n popula r media. MTV' s roc k videos display the al l too commo n formul a i n which a male rock star is surrounded b y scantily clad, sex-starved femal e model s (Jhall y 1990) . Women i n thes e fantasie s joyfull y fulfil l a statu s a s sexua l toys . Laur a Mulve y (1989, 19 ) explains th e pervasivenes s o f woman a s a visual image fo r mal e spec tatorship: In a world ordere d by sexual imbalance, pleasure in looking has been spli t between active/mal e an d passive/female . Th e determinin g mal e gaz e projects it s fantasy ont o th e femal e figure, whic h i s styled accordingly . I n their traditiona l exhibitionis t rol e wome n ar e simultaneousl y looke d a t and displayed , wit h thei r appearanc e code d fo r stron g visua l an d eroti c impact s o tha t the y ca n b e sai d t o connot e to-be-looked-at-ness. Woman

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displayed a s sexual objec t i s the leitmotif of erotic spectacle : fro m pin-up s to strip-tease , fro m Ziegfel d t o Busb y Berkeley , sh e hold s th e look , an d plays to an d signifie s mal e desire . M T V roc k video s represen t a specificall y mal e fantasy , no t a fantas y tha t women an d me n share. 6 Much male-constructe d visua l cultur e represent s wome n i n way s tha t d o not mirro r wha t wome n actuall y see k i n thei r se x lives . I f wome n wer e t o make video s involvin g thei r sexua l fantasies , i t i s doubtfu l tha t the y woul d involve wome n wh o loo k a s i f the y ha d no t eate n i n a week , groupe d together, al l fawnin g ove r a scruff y musician . Thoug h wome n ar e bein g turned al l th e tim e int o object s o f display , t o b e looke d a t an d stare d a t b y men, th e image s projecte d ma y hav e littl e relationshi p t o women' s rea l lives , fantasies, fears , an d desire s (Mulve y 1989 , 13) . Imagistic discourse s d o no t produc e desire s definitively . B y analogy , images o f "happ y darkies" 7 di d no t foo l everyone into thinkin g tha t black s enjoyed subordination , an d certainl y di d no t mak e blac k peopl e star t enjoy ing thei r subservience . Nevertheles s thos e image s ha d th e genera l effec t o f a legitimating ideology . I n th e sam e way , image s o f glamorize d femal e passiv ity legitimate women' s circumscribe d positio n bu t d o no t necessaril y produc e such desire s i n al l women o r al l men . The constan t representatio n o f wome n a s th e fantas y figures o f th e mal e spectator turn s th e wome n o f visua l cultur e int o objects . Imagisti c discours e suggests tha t me n hav e bodie s tha t wil l prevail , tha t ar e stron g an d impene trable. Femal e bodie s ar e no t represente d a s activ e agent s i n thi s way , bu t instead a s breakable , takeabl e bodies . Just a s suc h image s portra y wome n a s prey t o men' s violence , the y allo w me n t o imagin e themselve s a s invulnera ble, especiall y compare d t o women . Th e textua l representation s o f sexe d bodies ar e live d ou t a s materia l realities—a s evidence d b y women' s greate r likelihood t o pu t themselve s o n displa y sexuall y fo r th e gaz e o f another. Fur ther, th e imagisti c discourse s o f femininit y an d masculinit y perpetuat e th e myths tha t wome n actuall y enjo y bein g chase d an d capture d (i.e. , tha t no means yes); that wome n invit e rap e an d battery ; tha t onl y psychoti c stranger s rape; tha t me n canno t contro l thei r passion s o r thei r privates ; an d tha t me n rape an d batte r becaus e the y ar e s o big an d strong . Such popular images and other discourses construct wome n a s a class of people unabl e t o exercis e th e physica l agenc y characteristi c o f men. W o m e n hav e been "de-skilled " i n heterosexis t society , becaus e th e syste m reinforce s thei r economic dependenc e o n me n (Hoaglan d 1988 , 33). In addition , wome n hav e

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been de-skille d i n term s o f thei r potentia l a s fighters . The y ar e traine d t o b e weak an d thu s t o nee d a man , o r th e police , fo r protectio n agains t mal e vio lence. Thus , th e idea l o f passivity i s particular t o a system in whic h heterosex uality is a privileged institutio n an d identity. Th e physica l de-skillin g o f wome n and th e stigmatizatio n o f lesbians reinforc e eac h other : th e fea r o f being labele d a lesbian keep s man y wome n i n lin e just a s the heterosexis t society' s economi c and physica l de-skillin g o f wome n cultivate s amon g the m a psychicall y com pelling, an d ofte n materiall y real , nee d fo r a man . Ou r understandin g o f th e female bod y a s penetrabl e support s no t onl y compulsor y heterosexualit y bu t women's "rapeability. " Women's socializatio n ha s insure d th e continuatio n o f rap e culture , mak ing the m eas y an d easil y rationalize d target s fo r men' s abuse . A woman' s suc cessful tutelag e i n th e fragilit y o f the "mal e ego " can tur n int o a habituated dis avowal o f he r ow n strength s (Lerne r 1988) . Wome n ar e no t simpl y stupi d o r duped, thoug h ther e ar e intens e socia l pressure s o n the m t o exhibi t th e quali ties o f femininity. MacKinno n (1987 , 54 ) write s tha t "femininit y a s we kno w it i s ho w w e com e t o wan t mal e dominance , whic h mos t emphaticall y i s no t in ou r interest. " Still , wome n migh t fin d thei r "part " i n oppressio n i n a wa y which render s the m neithe r pur e victim s no r pur e agent s o f their ow n distres s (Rose 1986) . Women's pleasin g personalities ar e enforce d b y man y men' s expectations ; for wome n wh o refus e t o "reflec t me n a t twic e thei r natura l size, " a s Clin e and Spende r (1987 ) pu t it , hav e face d hars h consequences . W o m e n ar e no t allowed t o def y "feminine " obligation s an d clai m "masculine " entitlement s with impunity . Traditionally , a s I will explai n later , a woman wa s no t legall y permitted t o defen d hersel f agains t a sexua l assault , eve n thoug h th e assaul t itself, whe n no t perpetrate d b y he r husband , constitute d a felony . W o m e n who hav e defende d themselve s fro m murderou s husband s hav e bee n pun ished a s "crazy" an d sen t t o menta l hospitals . W h e n the y wer e luck y enoug h to clai m self-defens e i n court , man y wer e sen t t o jai l anywa y (Gillespi e 1989). When wive s wer e acquitte d o n charge s o f first-degre e murder—wome n like Francin e Hughes , wh o se t her batterin g husband' s be d t o bur n befor e dri ving awa y wit h he r childre n (Jone s 1980 , 299-300 , 306-7)—newspaper s printed headline s suc h a s "Self-Defens e Decisio n Causin g Doubl e Standard : Women Ge t Mor e Tha n Equa l Right s afte r Killin g Spouse. " Quip s lik e thi s one fro m a n attorney wer e als o common: "Hey , it' s open seaso n o n husbands " (Gillespie 1989 , 10) . Neve r min d tha t i t ha s lon g bee n ope n seaso n o n wive s and girlfriends : Wome n ar e si x times mor e likel y tha n me n t o experienc e vio -

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lence by an intimate (U.S . Department o f Justice 1995 , 3); in 1994 , almost tw o and a half times a s many wome n i n th e Unite d State s were murdere d b y mal e mates tha n vic e vers a (Unifor m Crim e Report s fo r th e Unite d State s 1994 , 19).8 Yet, eve n whe n defensive , women' s violenc e i s considered inappropriat e and unfeminine . Rape cultur e depends upon th e constructio n o f women a s a category o f persons desirabl e t o men , unabl e t o resis t men' s attacks , an d therefor e availabl e a s objects wit h whic h me n ca n satisf y a variety o f desires, includin g th e desir e t o prove thei r manhood . Women' s second-clas s citizenshi p i s no t simpl y a con tributing factor , bu t i s part o f the motivatio n fo r mal e violence . Women ar e subjected to , an d sometime s willingl y cultivate , a style o f violability tha t bleed s righ t int o rap e cultur e an d thei r ow n oppression . Mal e supremacist sexuality , lived ou t b y women an d men , i s not just a psychological, attitudinal, o r ideologica l matter . It' s a material reality . Gende r i s no les s bodil y or materia l becaus e i t i s discursiv e o r textual . Socia l institution s see p int o ou r bones. Th e standard s o f gender operat e throug h meanin g system s which them selves operat e throug h th e live d body .

Embodiment and Power Many peopl e migh t fin d believabl e dominan t discourse s tha t differentiat e me n and wome n alon g th e line s o f aggressio n no t onl y becaus e the y se e thos e dif ferences i n the social world but als o because the y feel those difference s i n them selves. As one female universit y studen t pu t it , "Gende r hasn' t affecte d th e kin d of person I've become. I'm no t a very aggressive person anyway." He r statemen t is interesting no t onl y fo r targetin g aggressio n a s that whic h distinguishe s me n from wome n bu t fo r admittin g tha t sh e genuinel y feel s les s aggressive tha n sh e imagines me n feel . Bu t th e fac t tha t w e fee l gende r a s a physical realit y isn' t s o surprising an d certainl y doesn' t controver t it s discursive , ideologica l status . Anatomical bodie s are constructed b y systems of power and are entirely sensual , real, an d consequential . Bodies ar e no t onl y marked , constitute d a s appropriat e fo r thei r cultura l requirements, throug h clothing , makeup , an d jewelry, bu t als o throug h phys ical habits such a s patterns o f movements an d gestures . I n othe r words , i t is not simply tha t w e ador n o r enhanc e a body tha t i s basically give n throug h biol ogy; discourse s o f gende r hel p constitut e ou r ver y biologica l organizatio n (Grosz 1994 , 142) . Discourse s o f se x differenc e becom e a par t o f ou r bodil y schema.

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Anyone wh o travel s outsid e hi s o r he r ow n cultur e notice s ho w peopl e embody culture : peopl e wal k an d gesticulate , tal k an d ea t i n way s uniqu e t o their culture . Variations i n embodimen t ar e not alway s simple example s o f cul tural relativism , though . Pierr e Bourdie u (1990 ) ha s suggeste d tha t powe r inequality i n an y give n cultur e influence s one' s embodiment , specificall y argu ing tha t w e lear n a se t o f bodily disposition s tha t ar e appropriat e fo r ou r clas s position. Politica l mytholog y i s embodied, o r "turne d int o a permanent dispo sition, a durable wa y o f standing, speaking , walking , an d thereb y o f feeling an d thinking" (ibid. , 69-70) . Bourdieu explains : One coul d endlessl y enumerat e th e values given body, made body, b y th e hidden persuasio n o f an implici t pedagog y whic h ca n instil l a whole cos mology, throug h injunction s a s insignificant a s "sit u p straight " o r "don' t hold you r knif e i n you r lef t hand, " an d inscrib e th e mos t fundamenta l principles o f th e arbitrar y conten t o f a cultur e i n seemingl y innocuou s details of bearing or physical and verbal manners, so putting them beyon d the reac h o f consciousness an d explici t statement . (Ibid. , 69 ) The embodimen t o f culture i s also gendered : Wome n no t onl y hea r "si t u p straight," but als o "put you r knee s together, " a s Susan Brownmiller (1984 , 187 ) recalls from he r childhood , o r "kee p you r dres s down an d your drawer s up, " as Barbara Smit h (1983 , xlv ) recall s fro m hers . Althoug h Bourdie u doe s no t dis cuss a cultur e o f sexua l violence , h e doe s mentio n th e gendere d use s o f th e body: "Th e specificall y feminin e virtu e . . . modesty, restraint , reserve , orient s the whol e femal e bod y downwards , toward s th e ground , th e inside , th e house , whereas mal e excellenc e . . . i s asserte d i n movemen t upwards , outwards , towards othe r men " (Bourdie u 1990 , 70). Bourdieu's theor y ca n mak e sens e o f the embodie d etho s o f rape culture . Bourdieu explain s tha t practical belief is not abou t adherin g to a set o f instituted dogma s o r doctrine s bu t is , rather , a stat e o f th e body . Thi s enacte d belief, i n th e worl d o f everyday life , i s the commonsens e knowledg e o r realit y that i s taken fo r granted . Al l o f these practica l belief s ar e displaye d an d experi enced a s states o f th e body . "Habitus " refer s t o th e embodie d taste s an d pref erences w e inheri t an d liv e ou t (ibid.) . Habitu s i s where th e progra m dwells ; it i s the socia l insid e th e body , th e sourc e o f our strategies , tha t whic h inform s action. Women, therefore , d o no t s o muc h conside r feminin e socialization , thin k it's a good idea , an d then d o it. Like it or not, feminis t o r not, i t becomes a state of th e body . Brownmille r (1984 , 171-72 ) articulate s he r successfu l feminin e movement an d recall s som e o f its iconic sources :

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Inspired b y classica l sculpture , Chines e ivorie s an d Florentin e art , I' m a n adept practitione r o f the obliqu e gesture , th e softene d motion , th e twist ing torso , th e widenin g eyes . I rarel y stan d straight , preferrin g t o lea n sideways from th e wais t with on e kne e slightl y flexed, on e hi p extended . I lower m y shoulde r whe n I lift m y arm , adjustin g th e balanc e o f elbow , wrist an d ringers , breakin g th e lin e a t eac h critica l joint. Withou t con scious effor t I smok e a cigarette, ea t a sandwich, regar d m y hand , clim b into a taxi with ful l assuranc e o f the feminin e effect . Here, Brownmille r trie s t o b e consciou s o f the feminin e habitus , whic h i s tha t set o f unconsciou s gesture s an d posture s tha t w e tak e fo r granted . Th e socia l order i s imposed throug h thes e traine d habit s o r skills . Th e se t o f movements , experiences, an d habit s peculia r t o one' s socia l histor y i s a "moto r memory " (Merleau-Ponty 1962) . Thi s moto r memor y i s gendere d becaus e w e liv e i n a world structure d b y se x inequality . A society o f sex inequality effect s an d require s gender-specifi c somat a (Hen ley 1977) . That i s to say, bodily postures, talking , walking, an d occupyin g spac e are learned habits "appropriate" for one' s sex class status. For instance, men ten d to addres s wome n i n mor e familia r term s rathe r tha n polit e ones , an d stan d closer t o wome n tha n the y would t o mal e nonintimates , equals , or people the y see a s superior. Me n ten d t o expec t wome n t o smil e a t them , bu t d o no t gen erally expec t t o reciprocat e (ibid.) . Iris Mario n Youn g (1990 ) explain s tha t a person's performanc e o f physica l tasks requirin g strengt h o r muscula r coordinatio n displa y gender . Girl s an d women ten d no t t o mak e ful l us e o f the body' s spatia l an d latera l potentialitie s (Young 1990 , 145) . Men's stride s an d gait s are typically longer, relativ e t o thei r size, than women's. Me n ar e more likel y t o swin g their arms , sit with thei r leg s open, stan d with thei r fee t apart , an d in genera l displa y less constricted posture s and gestures . Hence, a woman learn s to "thro w lik e a girl," that is, to withhol d strength, t o approac h physica l task s i n a timi d manner . Th e qui p "yo u thro w like a girl " i s no t simpl y base d o n a n innocen t observatio n tha t th e carryin g angle o f the elbo w i s likely to be differen t fo r a person wit h relativel y wide hip s than fo r a person wit h relativel y narro w hips . Such derisio n designate s a person as a n incompeten t thrower . Thi s physica l incompetenc e i s no t som e simpl e matter o f body siz e o r shape . It' s a matter o f how th e socia l get s lodge d insid e the body . Women's motion s ten d t o b e concentrate d i n on e bod y part , rathe r tha n fluid an d directed . Wome n ten d no t t o reach , extend , an d follo w throug h because they are not a s likely as men t o have developed a relationship with thei r bodies a s agents, a s instruments o f action :

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Women ofte n d o no t perceiv e themselve s a s capable o f lifting an d carry ing heav y things , pushin g an d shovin g wit h significan t force , pulling , squeezing, grasping , o r twistin g with force . Whe n w e attemp t t o d o suc h tasks, w e frequentl y fai l t o summo n th e ful l possibilitie s o f ou r muscula r coordination, position , poise , an d bearing . Wome n ten d no t t o pu t thei r whole bodie s int o engagemen t i n a physical tas k wit h th e sam e eas e an d naturalness a s men. (Ibid. ) Thus i f a woman throw s "lik e a girl," run s lik e a girl, swing s lik e a girl, climb s like a girl, an d hit s lik e a girl, i t i s not becaus e sh e ha s som e natura l disadvan tage relativ e t o men , bu t becaus e sh e doe s no t us e he r whol e bod y an d ful l strength; becaus e sh e ha s les s self-consciou s directio n an d placemen t t o he r body motion ; an d becaus e sh e approache s physica l task s wit h timidity , uncer tainty, an d hesitanc y (ibid. , 146) . Women hav e bee n traine d ou t o f physica l competenc e an d facilit y wit h mechanical devices , includin g firearms. I n contrast , aggressiv e physica l activit y and shootin g gun s hel p establis h an d confir m a man' s gende r identity . Fo r example, Davi d Barringer , writin g i n th e men' s magazin e Details, explain s tha t his childhoo d relationshi p wit h gun s wa s a romanti c one , watchin g medi a heroes triump h ove r bullies . Eve n i f mora l issue s prove d t o b e mor e compli cated i n adulthood , hi s approach t o gun s wa s a matter o f manhood : The year s o f cinematic brainwashin g ma y hav e prime d m e fo r a gun, bu t what finally mad e m e jump th e track s wa s neithe r fea r no r loathing , bu t an appeal to prov e m y manhood . . . . I approached i t as if I were cultivat ing a skil l ever y worldl y ma n shoul d master , on e neglecte d by , bu t no t inconsistent with , m y libera l art s education . Inspire d b y th e Greeks , wh o emphasized th e developmen t o f mind, body , an d spirit , wh o rappe d wit h Socrates and the n bashe d eac h othe r wit h swords , I decided t o buy a gun. (Barringer 1993 , 112 ) Girls an d wome n lac k suc h inspiratio n t o shoo t an d fight. I n fact , girl s don' t achieve womanhoo d b y cultivatin g thos e skills , the y compromis e it . T o thi s day, boy scouts can learn to shoot rifle s and shotguns startin g in the sixth grade . Girl scout s sel l cookie s an d contribut e t o charities , bu t neve r lear n t o shoot . The socia l investmen t i n women' s heterosexua l passivit y i s reveale d i n th e historical discouragemen t o f women fro m enterin g sports . Historically , peopl e thought athletics , especiall y competitiv e sports , mad e on e assertive , an d thu s deemed i t appropriat e fo r boy s bu t no t fo r girls . Women's economi c an d sex ual servitud e t o me n justified th e connectio n betwee n sport s an d men . Sport s have bee n see n a s a socializing agenc y tha t prepare s me n fo r adul t role s i n th e

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workplace an d politica l lif e (Boutilie r an d SanGiovann i 1983) . Variou s "experts" o f th e earl y twentiet h centur y wer e a s vehemen t abou t women' s abstinence fro m physica l educatio n a s they were abou t men' s participation i n it . Hence Nort h America n spor t ha s bee n a n aren a i n whic h me n coul d fee l their manhoo d a s powerfu l an d natura l (Messne r 1994) , particularl y becaus e personal identity ha s increasingly become roote d i n particular stylization s of the body. The physical character o f sports helps solidify o r mythologize men' s sens e of sexual differentiation a s a preexisting natural fact. Discouragin g women fro m athleticism help s produce a gendered differenc e i n bodily comportment . B y th e time w e ar e adults , particularl y whe n i t come s t o physica l tasks , men' s bodil y comportment bellows , " I can, " while women' s bodil y comportmen t chirps , " I can't." Those sport s in which wome n hav e been encourage d t o participate ar e ofte n noncombative practice s (eve n thoug h the y requir e strength , skill , an d stamina , and includ e th e pleasure s o f bod y mastery) , lik e tennis , aerobics , swimming , golf, an d gymnastics . Fewe r wome n engag e i n sport s tha t emphasiz e forc e an d body contact , suc h a s those popula r amon g boy s an d me n (a s participants an d spectators), namel y football , soccer , rugby , basketball , hockey , an d wrestling . Here, participant s lear n t o accomplis h thei r goal s i n th e fac e o f opposition , b y force. Tha t thi s catechism an d it s mythical statu s a s natural manl y aggressio n fi t well int o rap e cultur e i s evidence d b y on e advertisemen t fo r men' s athleti c shoes, in which th e mal e basketbal l her o i s asked abou t hi s "bigges t score"—t o which h e responds , "Betty , tent h grade. " A greate r numbe r o f U.S . female s tha n eve r befor e ar e competen t athletes , thanks i n larg e par t t o th e passag e o f Titl e I X o f th e Educatio n Equit y Ac t o f 1972, which prohibit s educationa l program s receivin g federal fund s t o exclude , deny, o r discriminat e agains t someon e o n th e basi s o f sex. Girl s wer e a mere 7 percent o f high schoo l athlete s i n 1971 . By 199 1 girl s were 3 6 percent (Phillip s 1995, 116) . But girl s ar e stil l discourage d fro m participatin g i n sports , particu larly thos e tha t involv e roug h pla y o r competitiveness . Th e cultivatio n o f shooting and fighting skill s still counts as unfeminine. Wome n ar e assessed mor e for thei r look s tha n fo r thei r physica l abilitie s o r persona l powers . Thu s whil e legal reform s ar e crucial , w e mus t addres s th e ideologica l association s tha t pi t femininity agains t physica l strength . N o on e know s bette r tha n th e girl s an d wome n wh o engag e i n aggressiv e contact sport s what a disruption o f gender thei r participation i s to so many peo ple. Th e youn g femal e athlet e soo n learn s o f a discrepancy betwee n th e bodil y comportment tha t goe s wit h he r athleti c accomplishment s an d tha t tie d t o he r attractiveness. Thi s conflic t betwee n beaut y an d athleticis m i s exemplifie d b y

Balls versus Ovaries | 4 3 school girls ' ambivalenc e abou t wearin g thei r school' s require d gy m clothe s (Scraton 1987) . I t i s hardly startling , i n ligh t o f these conflicts , tha t femal e ath letes hav e alway s bee n suspecte d o f being gende r outlaws. 9 N o wonde r team s of female rugb y players get stereotyped a s "dykes." Those women ar e not reall y suspected o f being i n lov e wit h eac h other . Thei r action s violat e heterosexua l femininity becaus e the y ar e aggressive , combative , an d powerful . Imagin e th e members o f an all-mal e footbal l tea m bein g labeled "fags" ; thi s is so incompre hensible precisel y becaus e aggressiv e sport s establis h me n a s properl y hetero sexual an d masculine . Sports as a male preserve help s turn th e political fictions o f gender int o prac tical sense. The embodie d etho s o f rape cultur e i s also perpetuated throug h th e practice o f sexual violence . Tha t violence , th e experienc e a s well a s the fea r o f it, produce s i n wome n specifi c feminin e dispositions . Th e fea r o f violenc e restricts women's mobilit y an d encourage s the m t o b e wit h mal e "protectors. " It prompt s wome n t o engag e i n a variety o f cautiou s an d modes t behavior s t o avoid crossin g th e lin e betwee n virtuou s woma n an d whor e (fo r who m littl e sympathy i s give n whe n victimized) . Wome n displa y deferenc e t o me n tha t they would no t otherwis e becaus e o f rape culture . Women might , fo r instance , wish t o attac k a street harasse r verball y bu t hesitat e t o d o s o fo r fea r o f violen t consequences. Sexua l violenc e weaken s women . Th e acts o f rap e an d batter y teach wome n tha t the y hav e n o boundarie s wit h men , tha t thei r bodie s ar e objects fo r someon e else' s use , tha t the y dar e no t impos e themselve s o r thei r desires ont o th e world . W e lear n tha t thi s is the privileg e o f men, no t women . When a woma n i s actuall y th e targe t o f mal e violence , he r bodil y com portment an d self-identit y ma y becom e al l th e mor e restricted . Fo r example , rape survivors told interviewers Scheppel e an d Bart (1983 , 71), "Fear has take n over suc h a large portion [o f my life]" ; "I' m scare d o f my ow n shadow" ; "I' m always afrai d someone' s ou t fo r m e now" ; an d "I' m jus t no t i n contro l o f myself. It' s horrible. " I t i s no t uncommo n fo r a rap e survivo r t o perceiv e a s dangerous a whol e hos t o f situations , no t jus t th e on e i n whic h sh e wa s assaulted. Th e reaction s o f sexual-assault survivor s testif y t o this : On e woma n attacked whil e ridin g he r bicycl e move d fro m he r hom e an d naile d th e win dows shu t i n he r ne w home , an d bega n t o loc k he r door s whil e driving ; another woma n attacke d i n a cornfield develope d a fear o f close d spaces , par ticularly being in elevator s with strang e men ; an d stil l another woma n attacke d by a n acquaintanc e woul d n o longe r d o he r laundr y a t nigh t (Scheppel e an d Bart 1983 , 69) . I n short , wome n wh o hav e bee n sexuall y assaulte d perceiv e seemingly unrelate d situation s i n th e worl d a s mor e dangerou s followin g th e assault experience .

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Just a s rape contributes t o the embodimen t o f a certain kind o f demeanor, s o does a n intimat e partner' s battering . Submissivenes s an d dependenc e ar e responses t o suc h abuse . Trait s associate d wit h femininit y ar e response s t o sub ordination i n genera l (Snodgrass , i n Graha m e t al . 1994 , 194) . Just a s politica l hostages tr y t o kee p thei r captor s cal m b y takin g responsibilit y fo r th e captors ' feelings an d fo r th e smoot h functionin g o f th e captor-captiv e relationship , women i n relationship s wit h physicall y abusiv e partner s becom e increasingl y feminine a s a survival strateg y (Graha m e t al . 1994 , 195-96) . I n thes e ways , th e norms o f a rape cultur e ar e written int o ou r bodies. Rape cultur e i s naturalize d through th e somatizatio n o f cultural norms , provided b y a variety o f discourse s and practices . A s we shal l se e next , rap e an d self-defens e law s hav e als o solidi fied aggressio n a s a manly domain .

The Acceptance of Men's Aggression in Rape and Self-Defense Laws Traditional rap e law reveal s th e socia l status of women relativ e t o men . Specif ically, wome n wer e conceive d legall y a s whit e men' s property . Rap e wa s a property crim e agains t a man . Wif e beatin g wa s no t a t al l restricte d unti l th e 1860s (Gillespi e 1989 , 39) . Prostitute s an d blac k wome n slave s wer e no t regarded a s capable o f refusing sex , an d therefor e wer e no t considere d deserv ing o f protectio n fro m rap e th e wa y whit e wome n were . Althoug h women' s rights activist s have fought har d t o chang e rap e law an d its application i n court , today rap e la w an d it s applicatio n stil l regulat e whic h me n ge t t o rap e whic h women. (Chapte r 5 addresses the recen t wor k o f visionary feminis t lawyer s an d legal theorists. ) Reflecting al l sorts of myths about th e naturalnes s o f rape, rape law puts vic tims o n trial . Thoug h n o longe r a formal rule , th e woman' s experienc e ofte n informally require s independent corroboratio n fo r it to be valid evidence, whil e the man' s doe s not (Estric h 1987) . The la w concerns itsel f with th e man' s wor d (did he experienc e i t as rape?) rathe r tha n th e woman' s (di d she experience i t as rape?). I f the man o n tria l says that h e believed tha t th e woman consented , the n he canno t b e convicte d o f rape (Dumares q 1981 , 53). Thi s lega l privilegin g o f men's perception s ove r women' s justifies an d perpetuate s men' s imperceptive ness toward wome n i n matter s o f sexual congres s (MacKinno n 1989) . Men ar e rarely punished fo r thei r violence a s rapists and a s batterers. Onl y a tiny portio n of men wh o rap e o r batte r ge t convicte d o r eve n fac e a jury. Rape la w solidifie s rap e culture , mal e domination , an d se x differenc e itself . Law solidifie s "man " an d "woman"—cultura l interventions , force d identities ,

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and construct s o f perception—into feature s o f being (MacKinno n 1989 , 237) . This is why the forced penetratio n o f a man is so much wors e i n the eyes of th e law, an d in the eyes of many people , tha n th e forced penetratio n o f a woman . Traditional sodom y law s mak e thi s eve n mor e clear . Law s agains t sodom y affirm tha t me n ar e no t suppose d t o b e penetrated ; thes e law s tur n eve n th e consensual penetratio n o f a man into a n "unnatural " an d punishable act . Men are not supposed t o be put sexually i n the position o f women, thei r socia l infe riors (Dworki n 1987 , 155-56). In it s delineation o f who i s allowed t o resis t rap e an d when an d why, self defense la w captures a set of assumptions abou t wh y rape i s wrong, whe n rap e is wrong, what men's violence means, and what women's resistanc e to it means. Self-defense an d rap e law s hav e presume d tha t se x is a natura l ac t between a man an d a woman. Hence , i f a man forces anothe r ma n into sex , it is a muc h greater violatio n ( a violation rathe r tha n a n expressio n o f "natural " passions ) and thus warrants greate r violence fo r its prevention. Cas e law allows the use of deadly forc e t o prevent forcibl e sodom y betwee n male s (Schneide r an d Jordan 1978, 153-54) . Self-defense la w ha s traditionall y enable d me n t o defen d themselve s an d their wome n agains t rape , an d has not enable d wome n t o defen d themselve s against rap e an d battery. Thus , unti l feminis t lega l reform s challenge d th e tra dition, unmarrie d wome n ha d n o protectio n fro m men' s aggressio n i n self defense law , and married wome n coul d no t defend themselve s fro m thei r ow n husbands. A law , repeale d i n 1973 , once permitte d a husban d t o kil l anothe r man i f he caugh t tha t ma n in bed with hi s wife. Ye t a woman ha s never bee n allowed to kill her husband's lover if she found hi m with anothe r woman i n bed (Schneider an d Jordan 1981 , 14). This typ e o f violent passionat e rag e i s toler ated whe n i t erupt s i n a man, but in a woman i t cause s publi c outrage . C o n sider th e hysterica l crie s o f men expresse d i n th e media ove r Loren a Bobbitt' s enraged severin g o f her husband's peni s afte r wha t sh e alleged t o be continua l physical abus e includin g rap e (Grindstaf f an d McCaughe y 1996) . History give s u s a sense o f how laws regulate d violenc e i n way s tha t mad e men's wife abus e acceptable and women's self-defensive violence virtually impos sible. Colonia l lawmaker s relie d upo n Englis h Commo n La w t o defin e th e murder o f a husband (fo r white women ) o r a master (fo r black women ) a s petit treason—solidifying whit e men' s position s a s "lords"—suc h tha t murderin g one o f them was like murdering th e king on a slightly smalle r scale (Jone s 1980, 38). Man y whit e wome n durin g thes e time s wer e foun d guilt y an d sent t o the gallows t o be burned aliv e fo r committin g act s o f violence agains t men ; man y black wome n wer e hun g ( a form o f execution though t wors e tha n burning , as

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burning wa s considere d mor e appropriat e fo r th e "natura l modesty " o f th e female sex ) without s o much a s a trial o r a particularly bi g story in th e newspa per (Jone s 1980 , 38 , 207). A woma n i n man y state s toda y canno t legall y us e letha l forc e t o preven t a man fro m rapin g her . Eve n i n th e states i n whic h a person i s permitted t o kil l to preven t th e commissio n o f a violent o r forcible felony , th e statute s eithe r d o not specify whic h felonie s the y cover or are sometimes reinterpreted t o exclud e rape (Gillespi e 1989 , 62-63) . So , fo r instance , whe n i n 195 9 a woman stabbe d to deat h a man wh o wa s a tenant i n he r Lo s Angeles hom e an d wh o ha d sexu ally assaulte d he r an d threatene d tha t h e woul d hav e he r tha t nigh t o r kil l her , the judge disagree d wit h th e defense' s argumen t tha t unde r Californi a la w th e woman wa s permitte d t o kil l t o resis t a n attemp t t o commi t felon y rape . Sh e was convicted o f manslaughter; th e Californi a Cour t o f Appeals upheld th e tria l judge's rulin g an d th e convictio n (ibid. , 63) . Even whe n state s formall y permi t the us e o f deadl y forc e i n self-defens e agains t rape , a woman wh o kill s a ma n trying t o rap e he r mus t mee t th e othe r requirement s o f self-defense , provin g that th e threatene d har m was imminent, tha t she was unable t o retreat , an d tha t her perceptio n o f dange r wa s reasonable . Suc h a woma n als o face s th e sam e troubles rape victims face in court: her credibility is undermined an d many peo ple d o no t believ e he r (ibid. , 63-64) . In 1924 , th e Suprem e Cour t o f Ne w Mexic o rule d tha t rap e wa s a felon y covered b y th e state' s statut e permittin g a person t o kil l i n orde r t o preven t it s commission. As the cas e involved a virtuous wife an d mother, Hilari a Martinez , who sho t a ma n wh o twic e trie d t o moles t he r whil e he r husban d wa s awa y from th e hous e an d cam e afte r he r a third time , i t suggeste d tha t a woman ha d a righ t t o kil l "i n defens e o f chastity " (quote d i n ibid. , 62) . Thu s women' s aggression wa s acceptabl e i f women' s essentia l rol e a s nurturin g mother s an d virtuous propert y o f men wa s being upheld . This toleranc e o f ladylik e women' s necessar y self-defensiv e aggressio n cannot wor k a s well fo r blac k women , wh o hav e no t a s readily bee n see n a s virtuous ladie s deservin g o f men' s restrain t fro m hittin g ladies . N o r coul d black wome n a s easily pas s fo r helples s damsel s i n distress , whic h mad e the m appear mor e violentl y motivate d i f they kille d o r maime d i n self-defense . I f it is black men' s violenc e tha t the y ar e protectin g themselve s from , the n polic e have historicall y ha d difficult y seein g blac k women' s violenc e a s self-defen sive, construing i t all as just s o much blac k violence (Jone s 1980 , 336). Because the idea l o f womanhoo d i s whit e an d heterosexual , an d thi s idea l preclude s aggression, fe w case s of women's self-defensiv e violenc e hav e seeme d accept able.

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For most of U.S. history, a woman's pleading justifiable self-defens e wa s practically unthinkable. Temporar y insanit y used to be th e most commo n defens e o f women wh o killed to prevent rape, murder, o r incessant beatings. These wome n have bee n committe d t o menta l institution s sometime s fo r fa r longe r period s than they would have spent in prison if convicted o f a crime (Gillespi e 1989 , 25). Defense lawyer s use d a woman's backgroun d t o justify th e homicide , suc h a s if the woma n wa s eve r moleste d o r raped , o r i f she ha d " a particularly sever e cul tural o r socia l reactio n t o sexua l assault " (Schneide r an d Jordan 1981 , 30)—a s though preventin g assaul t aggressivel y require d a particularly sever e reactio n t o sexual assault . Th e woman' s defens e woul d argu e tha t sh e wa s drive n t o th e breaking poin t b y circumstance s (ibid.) . (Mor e recen t feminis t reform s o f self defense la w ar e discusse d i n chapte r 5. ) In contrast , a man ha s not ha d t o argu e tha t h e ha s a particularly sever e reac tion t o force d ana l se x i n orde r t o justify killin g a man wh o trie s t o rap e him . Many women hav e wound u p with lawyers who di d not believ e that they acte d in self-defense an d who therefor e encourage d the m t o plead guilty to a reduced charge o f manslaughte r o r second-degre e murde r (Gillespi e 1989 , 25) . Eve n when wome n hav e claime d self-defens e i n court , the y face d judges an d juries whose assumption s wer e informe d b y a cultur e tha t demand s an d normalize s feminine manners . A t thes e man y level s o f th e lega l process , women' s aggres sion i s de-legitimized . Women wh o kille d thei r batterer s befor e bein g kille d themselve s hav e als o been see n as insane. For example , Roxanne Gay , who kille d her extremel y vio lent husband , th e Philadelphi a Eagle s defensiv e linema n Blend a Gay , afte r repeated dead-en d attempt s t o ge t th e polic e t o hel p he r (th e polic e preferre d to tal k footbal l wit h Mr . Ga y onc e the y arrive d a t th e hous e [ibid. , 13]) , wa s officially liste d a s paranoi d schizophrenic . Th e mal e psychiatrist s determine d that sh e suffere d fro m "delusion s tha t he r husband , he r famil y an d polic e wer e plotting t o kil l her " (quote d i n Jones 1980 , 306) . W e migh t questio n wh y a woman wh o wa s repeatedl y beate n b y he r husban d an d refuse d hel p b y th e police woul d b e considere d irrationa l o r delude d fo r thinkin g tha t suc h peopl e were tryin g t o kil l her . A centur y ago , man y me n unabashedl y struc k thei r wives. Henc e domesti c violenc e i s still often see n an d treate d a s a misdemeano r (Gillespie 1989 , 61). And a woman's violen t refusa l o f such abuse , an d clai m t o the appropriatenes s o f her self-defensiv e violence , ca n stil l toda y see m startlin g and eve n a bit unbalanced . Self-defense la w varies from stat e to state , but generall y i t says that " a perso n may us e deadl y forc e t o protec t hersel f fro m wha t sh e reasonabl y perceive s t o be a n imminent , deadl y attack . However , deadl y forc e ma y no t b e use d i f th e

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defendant wa s th e initia l aggressor , provoke d th e attac k o r (i n som e jurisdic tions) faile d t o retrea t i f she coul d hav e don e s o safely " (Bochna k 1981b , 43) . Traditional self-defens e la w was constructed wit h ideal s of masculinity i n mind . For instance , ther e i s the "tru e man " doctrin e tha t exculpate s a "person" fro m the obligatio n t o attemp t t o flee first befor e usin g deadl y forc e i n self-defense , and th e relate d "castle " doctrine , whic h allow s a "person" t o us e deadl y forc e if the assailan t i s already i n one' s ow n hom e (castle ) (Gillespi e 1989 , 82) . Thes e rarely wor k fo r women , mos t o f whom wer e i n thei r ow n home s a t th e tim e they assaulte d o r kille d i n self-defense . The N o Retrea t Rule , a precedent know n i n commo n la w as the "tru e ma n rule," allow s a ma n t o kil l eve n i f h e coul d hav e retreate d t o safet y withou t using violenc e t o defen d himsel f (Ewin g 1990 , 588) . As on e commentato r pu t it, " N o on e shoul d b e force d b y a wrongdoer t o th e ignominy , dishono r an d disgrace o f a cowardly retreat " (Beale , quote d i n ibid.) . Th e "tru e man " doc trine exculpate s th e threatene d perso n fro m th e requiremen t o f a n attemp t t o retreat fro m th e threat . Th e effect , i f not th e purpose , o f self-defense law , then , has bee n t o rewar d behavior s tha t ar e "manly " an d punis h behavior s tha t ar e not. After a n 187 6 case , th e Ohi o Suprem e Cour t announce d tha t " a tru e man , who i s without fault , i s not oblige d t o flee fro m a n assailant , who , b y violenc e or surprise , seek s t o tak e hi s life o r d o hi m enormou s bodil y harm " (quote d i n Gillespie 1989 , 78) . I t i s harder t o imagin e tha t a "true woman " woul d no t b e expected t o retrea t an d instea d b e allowe d t o tak e violen t action . Afte r all , a "true woman " i n ou r cultura l logi c woul d simpl y tak e th e abus e politely . Me n are mor e likel y tha n wome n t o b e i n a fight tha t i s mutuall y entered ; i n con trast, wome n ar e mor e likel y t o experienc e unilatera l physica l assaul t (ibid.) . Thus th e legal burden t o retreat , a s well as the "tru e man " exceptio n t o it, rein force manl y behavio r i n manl y fights. What count s a s provocation i n th e la w help s justify men' s violenc e bu t no t women's. Radfor d (1994 , 193 ) note s tha t th e defens e o f provocation , whic h makes th e crim e an d penalt y les s than murder , ha s not helpe d wome n a s muc h as men. Th e gendere d doubl e standar d i n th e law is exemplified b y the fact tha t infidelity an d allegation s abou t sexua l (in ) capacity ar e privilege d a s things tha t count a s provocation ove r an d abov e a history o f abuse , threats , an d violence . Men hav e bee n allowe d t o b e angr y ("passionate" ) bu t wome n usuall y ca n b e only fearful . I f a woman i s fearful an d angry , he r self-defensiv e violenc e ca n b e considered revenge-motivated murder . As Hart (1994 , 152 ) points out, "passio n and/or patholog y hav e bee n th e ke y historica l construct s fo r explaining , an d containing, women' s aggression. "

Balls versus Ovaries | 4 9 Self-defense la w has presumed tha t women ar e naturally sexuall y available t o those me n define d a s thei r socia l superiors . Hence , i f a woma n aggressivel y refuses a man's attemp t t o ge t se x sh e coul d ver y wel l b e punishe d a s crazy o r as a murderer . Idea s abou t th e naturalnes s o f heterosexua l intercourse—an d hence th e unnaturalnes s o f both women' s desir e to abstai n an d violent enforce ment o f tha t desire—infor m self-defens e la w an d th e typica l outcome s o f women's self-defens e cases . Afte r Ine z Garci a wa s foun d guilt y o f murderin g the ma n wh o ha d assiste d i n hi s friend' s rap e o f her an d wh o ha d calle d he r t o promise tha t bot h me n woul d retur n t o he r hom e t o d o somethin g worse , on e juror remarked , "Yo u can' t kil l someon e fo r tryin g t o giv e yo u a goo d time " (Schneider an d Jordan 1981 , 15). 10 Garcia's cas e exemplifie s anothe r sexis t bia s i n self-defens e law . Th e immi nence requirement , statin g tha t th e threa t mus t b e immediat e i n orde r t o justify letha l self-defense , make s sens e for me n i n a n agreed-upo n barroo m brawl . But whe n i t come s t o a woman facin g a man tryin g t o rap e her , sh e mus t wai t long enoug h fo r th e rap e t o ensu e bu t no t s o lon g tha t sh e canno t stil l sto p i t from occurring . Thu s a woman wh o harm s a man tryin g t o rap e he r ca n easil y be accuse d o f either actin g when a man wa s merely "flirting " (tha t is, when th e threat wa s no t imminent ) o r engagin g i n vengefu l violenc e (tha t is , whe n th e threat ha d alread y passed ) (Gillespi e 1989 , 74). Feminist lawyer s hav e emphasize d th e sociall y constructe d an d maintaine d differences tha t resul t fro m a sexis t societ y i n orde r t o preven t wome n fro m being judge d throug h th e masculinis t len s o f existin g self-defens e law . Fo r instance, becaus e th e imminenc e requiremen t fail s t o tak e int o accoun t man y of women's self-defens e situations , feminist lawyer s explain , "Th e crucia l poin t to be conveye d t o th e judge an d jury i s that, du e t o a variety o f societally base d factors, a woman ma y reasonabl y perceiv e imminen t an d letha l dange r i n a situation i n whic h a ma n migh t not " (Schneide r an d Jordan 1978 , 150) . Thes e feminists ar e fighting t o hav e women' s conduc t judged i n term s o f perception s a woman migh t hav e o f a situation, gleane d fro m bein g i n tha t situatio n o r i n a sexist societ y mor e broadly . The y se e th e physicall y "de-skilled " stat e o f women a s a product o f the sexist society . Henc e a "reasonable woman, " no t a "reasonable man " o r "reasonabl e person, " migh t fee l particularly threatene d b y an enrage d husband . Discourses tha t fram e wome n a s physically vulnerabl e an d passiv e an d me n as active and capabl e o f aggressive actio n ar e not limited t o laws, science, medi a fantasies, an d criminology. Code s of femininity circulat e throughou t publi c dis course, comin g from cosmetic s companie s an d scientifi c stories . The y als o appear i n advic e an d publi c servic e messages—eve n i n th e ver y statement s tha t

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attempt t o alter the rate with whic h me n victimiz e women. I n the next section , I show ho w man y rap e prevention manual s rende r women' s aggressio n impos sible o r invalid , followe d b y th e challeng e presente d b y mor e recen t feminis t advice.

Assumptions about Gender and Aggression in Rape Prevention Advice Self-defense manual s o f ol d an d polic e rap e preventio n advic e provid e on e se t of publi c discourse s whic h mediat e "proper " an d "sensible " socia l relations . How ar e gendere d body-code s assumed , naturalized , reinforced , an d chal lenged in the rape prevention advic e provided t o women? Th e discours e of selfprotection borrow s fro m othe r discourses , suc h a s Christian discourse s o f fem inine virtu e an d purity , patriarcha l discourse s o f maternalism, an d feminis t dis courses o f choice an d freedom . Man y o f the description s rel y o n rap e culture' s gender ideolog y an d thereb y reinforc e th e ver y construction s o f gende r tha t support rap e culture , eve n whil e the y tr y t o teac h th e mean s b y which , o n a very practica l level , wome n migh t challeng e assailants . On e researche r foun d that women' s idea s abou t crim e preventio n wer e ver y simila r t o thos e i n pub lished crim e preventio n advic e (Gardne r 1990). 11 Thi s bod y o f advice , then , arguably capture s a general sentimen t i n th e Unite d States , beyond th e wome n who hav e rea d thes e books , abou t wha t sort s o f aggressio n agains t attacker s i s necessary, appropriate , an d possibl e fo r women . Two self-defens e manual s tha t cam e ou t durin g World Wa r II , both writte n by militar y men , ar e worth examinin g befor e reviewin g th e self-defens e book s of the 1970 s and 1980s , since the y provide a significant contrast . U.S . women' s fighting skill s were encourage d i n th e sam e wa y tha t wome n wer e encourage d to join th e militar y an d wor k i n th e factorie s durin g th e war . Man y ar e famil iar with th e wartim e imag e o f "Rosie th e Riveter. " He r bicep s bulgin g ou t o f her blue-colla r shirt , sh e wa s a n imag e o f femal e strengt h tha t encourage d women t o wor k i n factories , an d fill positions usuall y reserve d fo r me n durin g peacetime. Wome n wer e encourage d t o d o unfeminin e things , primaril y through a massiv e propagand a campaign , whe n i t woul d hel p wi n th e wa r (Reskin an d Padavi c 1994 , 51) . Major Willia m Fairbairn' s illustrate d book Hands Off! (1942) , which sol d fo r 75 cents , an d Corpora l Willia m Underwood' s Self-Defense for Women: Combato (1944) provid e a serie s o f self-defens e maneuver s fo r women . Th e Majo r explains, "I t goe s withou t sayin g tha t a woman shoul d kno w ho w t o protec t

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herself. In war time—in Americ a a t war—this i s doubly so . . . . The confidenc e you wil l gain fro m havin g learned ho w t o protec t yourself , fro m knowin g tha t you ar e the master of any unpleasant situation with which you ma y have to deal, will immeasurabl y increas e you r efficienc y an d valu e t o th e wa r effort " (Fair bairn 1942 , vii) . U.S . women' s aggressio n agains t me n i s accepte d whe n i t i s needed b y nationalism . Thi s wa y th e heterosexua l virtu e o f wome n remain s intact. Without eve r mentionin g th e word s rape or sexual assault, th e boo k explain s a serie s o f hold s tha t men , familia r men , migh t ge t wome n into , suc h a s th e "waist hold " (ibid. , 13-15) , th e "bea r hug " (ibid. , 10-11) , an d th e "theate r hold" (ibid. , 33) , whic h i s a typ e o f hol d tha t me n presumabl y attemp t a t th e show. Corpora l Underwood' s (1944 , 24-33 ) boo k show s defensiv e move s fo r "simple nuisances " t o "seriou s bu t no t deadly " (ibid. , 34-76 ) t o "deadl y seri ous" threat s (ibid. , 78-93) . I n th e firs t category , w e find theate r touches , a ma n who wil l no t g o hom e whe n h e should , an d a handshaker wh o wil l no t le t g o when th e perio d o f polite greetin g ha s more tha n expired . Wome n reader s ar e instructed t o gra b th e han d o f th e haples s handshaker , twis t hi s ar m around , throw hi m t o th e ground , and , finally, giv e a stom p t o hi s Adam' s appl e o r a kick behin d hi s ea r (ibid. , 32-33) . The corpora l notes , "Th e treatmen t show n ma y see m a trifl e drasti c fo r someone wh o i s merel y bein g 'fresh. ' Perhap s i t is , bu t thi s typ e o f approac h may lead to something more serious " (ibid., 32) . Hands Off! (Fairbairn 1942 , 25) recommends tha t a woman wh o find s a man shakin g he r han d to o lon g pinc h the gri p t o "tak e th e concei t ou t o f him. " Fo r th e ma n wh o ask s fo r a light , Hands Off! provides a n illustratio n o f a woman throwin g a punch i n hi s face; i f a ma n stop s o n a dark roa d an d demands a light, wome n ar e instructe d t o ligh t the entir e matchboo k o n fire an d thro w i t i n hi s face (ibid. , 41) . Clearly , thes e books teac h wome n seriou s an d violen t defens e move s eve n agains t dates . In contrast , a significan t numbe r o f crim e preventio n booklet s an d self defense book s fo r wome n o f th e 1970 s an d 1980 s imput e deficien t physica l competence t o women , rarel y recommen d violen t techniques , an d expec t women t o limi t themselve s i n orde r t o achiev e som e "freedom " fro m sexua l assault. Polic e emphasiz e crim e prevention , whic h i s understandable sinc e the y want les s crim e i n th e first place , bu t thi s emphasi s wit h regar d t o wome n an d rape mean s tha t the y tel l wome n t o b e les s tha n fre e citizens . I n a booklet o n crime preventio n fo r women , th e U.S . Departmen t o f Justice (1977 ) says : "B e selective abou t ne w acquaintances ; don' t invite a forcibl e sexua l encounter " (emphasis i n original). 12 Th e Californi a Stat e Polic e manual , Safety Tips for Women (1976 , 7), itself a partial reproductio n o f a booklet b y th e sam e nam e o f

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the Washington , D.C. , Metropolita n Polic e Department , cautions : "Don' t invite troubl e b y goin g t o nigh t club s unescorted. " Thi s manua l als o advise s women t o "avoi d goin g ou t alon e a t night" (Californi a Stat e Police 1976 , 7). Women ar e encourage d t o hesitat e i n a n assaul t situation : "Yo u shoul d no t immediately try t o fight back . Chance s are , you r attacke r ha s th e advantage " (U.S. Department o f Justice 1977 , emphasis in original). If the attacker is armed, women ar e instructed no t t o eve n tr y t o fight: "Yo u shoul d neve r resis t if your attacker has a weapon" (ibid.) . Women ar e routinely tol d no t t o resist an arme d assailant, an d no t t o ar m themselve s becaus e th e weapo n coul d b e take n awa y and use d agains t them . An d ye t women ar e als o told tha t thei r attacker , eve n i f unarmed, probably has the advantage. Hence, women nee d a weapon t o be able to matc h a ma n an d ye t canno t us e a weapo n becaus e thei r assailan t wil l b e more skille d in the us e of such technology an d somehow tak e it from the m an d hurt the m wit h it : "Don' t carr y a gu n o r an y weapon . I t ca n easil y b e turne d against you" (ibid.) . Police manual s d o no t teac h wome n ho w t o tak e th e advantag e wit h a n assailant, thus positioning women a s incompetent an d in need o f protection an d sequestration, an d positionin g me n a s unstoppabl e animal s wh o ar e free t o roam. Suc h rape prevention advic e does not prevent rap e by addressing itself to men, th e bul k o f th e rapists , o r b y emphasizin g women' s abilit y t o fight of f attackers. Indeed , i t i s as though fighting wer e impossibl e o r simpl y distasteful , even whe n a woma n i s bein g threatened . Th e Californi a Stat e Police' s pam phlet says : "If you axe forced to defen d yourself , remember . . . . Scream, Scream , Scream" (1976 , 10 , emphasi s i n original) . Thi s sam e pamphle t explain s tha t women d o have some bodily weapons, and can use things like a rolled up news paper t o strik e someone , bu t follow s wit h thi s caveat : " C A U T I O N ! 'Self defense' tactic s are not foolproo f an d shoul d be use d only a s a last resort" (ibid. , 11). O f course , screamin g an d stayin g in a t nigh t ar e no t foolproo f either . Unlike th e briefer manual s and pamphlets, self-defense book s ofte n begi n b y motivating wome n t o lear n self-defens e wit h a rational e fo r it s importance . Some speak of urbanization an d the disintegratio n o f the family, a s though rura l towns an d close-kni t communitie s wer e safe r fo r wome n (e.g. , He y den an d Tarpening 1970 ; Luchsinge r 1977 ; Monkeru d an d Hein y 1980 ; Stoc k 1968) . This ca n suppor t th e myt h tha t wome n ar e attacke d mainl y b y strangers . On e spoke o f women' s "new " freedom an d independenc e whic h "ha s thrus t women int o a sometime s bruta l an d hostil e world " (Monkeru d an d Hein y 1980, 10)—a s if women ha d simply been protected previously from a world tha t has been bruta l an d hostile t o me n only . Other s present a frightening lis t of statistics t o sho w ho w vulnerabl e wome n ar e t o assaul t (e.g. , McGur n an d Kell y

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1984). Thi s promotio n o f a high-ris k environmen t i n orde r t o encourag e women's participatio n i n self-defens e i s exemplified i n Self-Defense for Women: The West Point Way, whic h urges : "Don' t delay ! Th e urba n jungle i s becom ing mor e dangerou s everyday!" (Peterson 1979 , 15 , emphasis i n original) . These books , lik e polic e an d governmen t advic e t o women , commonl y advise restricting women's behaviors . Thi s i s not t o sa y that women shoul d no t be taugh t safet y tactic s tha t hel p minimiz e th e likelihoo d o f assault . Afte r all , nobody want s t o b e assaulted , eve n i f she coul d b e certai n tha t sh e woul d wi n the fight. Bu t ofte n th e advic e extend s beyon d suggestion s o f proper lock s fo r doors an d trustin g you r instincts . Fo r instance , i n Every Woman Can (Conro y and Ritv o 1982 , 96) , wome n ar e give n thes e suggestion s fo r dating : "Wea r appropriate clothing ; avoid provocative word s and actions; don't g o where yo u know yo u won' t b e comfortable ; an d avoi d drivin g t o isolate d areas. " The Rational Woman's Guide to Self-Defense (Conroy 1972 , 7) emphasizes "avoidin g danger" t o th e poin t wher e reader s ar e tol d t o fight onl y whe n thei r live s o r health ar e i n danger . "Dangers " t o b e avoide d ar e thing s lik e "attendin g p u b lic functions alon e an d travelin g alone " (ibid.) . Self-Defense for Women (Gustu son an d Masak i 1970 ) teache s "rule s o f modesty, " discouragin g wha t th e authors se e as the typica l Nort h America n woman' s tendenc y t o us e th e curve s of her bod y t o attrac t attentio n fro m men . Such restriction s wome n ar e suggested t o plac e upo n themselve s i n orde r t o be mor e "free " o f assaul t simpl y ge t wome n t o tak e responsibilit y fo r men' s interest i n assaultin g them . Thi s implicitl y take s fo r grante d men' s desire , an d ability, t o assaul t women . Thes e recommende d restriction s o n wome n also , a s Scheppele an d Bar t (1983 ) poin t out , encourag e wome n t o thin k tha t assaul t is an avoidable situatio n i f they simpl y stay out o f dangerous places and situations . However, wome n confron t a risk of attack "tha t i s not easil y isolated i n specifi c situations tha t ca n be avoided " (ibid. , 65) . Thus "guidin g one' s lif e b y 'rule s o f rape avoidance ' . . . i s not necessaril y helpfu l i n avoidin g rape " (ibid.) . The assumptio n tha t th e me n agains t who m wome n wil l hav e t o defen d themselves ar e strangers subtl y underlie s muc h advic e t o women . Fo r instance , The Rational Woman's Guide to Self-Defense (Conro y 1972 , 7 ) suggest s tha t women avoi d danger s like attending public function s alon e an d traveling alone , but doe s no t includ e datin g a s a dange r t o avoid . Self-Defense for Girls: A Secondary School and College Manual (Tegne r an d McGrat h 1967 ) instruct s wome n on gettin g int o elevator s an d thei r cars , walkin g alon e a t night , an d talkin g o n the phone , bu t no t o n date s o r i n th e classroom . An d Every Woman Can: The Conroy Method to Safety (Conro y an d Ritv o 1982 ) provide s a range o f combat ive self-defens e technique s bu t seem s t o sugges t tha t the y woul d onl y b e use d

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on strangers . The sectio n i n the book coverin g unusual case s along with tip s fo r handling them includes the "overzealous date," which i s followed b y other not so-likely scenarios such as the "viciou s dog," "gan g of small children," "woma n beating," an d finally "violen t women " (ibid. , 97-102) . Violence i n intimat e relationship s i s fa r mor e commo n tha n violenc e b y strangers; thu s woma n beater s an d overzealou s date s ar e no t simpl y od d nui sances or bizarre circumstances. Curiously , th e many physical self-defense tech niques show n i n th e boo k ar e no t applie d t o th e "overzealou s date. " I n fact , women ar e encourage d t o us e verbal technique s and , i f those fail , t o "eithe r g o to a public are a wher e h e canno t continu e t o anno y yo u o r leav e him " (ibid. , 97). Thi s i s a fa r cr y fro m th e advic e give n t o wome n durin g Worl d Wa r II , when the y were instructe d no t t o negotiate with me n the y knew, bu t t o "com bato" the m t o th e groun d fo r imprope r datin g procedure . (Every Woman Can does note that , i n "rar e circumstances, " a woman's dat e may have "certai n psy chological disturbances " whic h woul d mak e hi m n o longe r a date bu t a "seri ous assailant , an d a full-fledged counterattac k t o immobiliz e hi m ma y b e nec essary" [ibid.]. ) The focu s o n th e dange r o f strangers ha s the effec t o f solidifying i n women' s minds th e myt h tha t women ar e most i n dange r o f psychos whose craze d attack s are difficult t o spoil. This portrait of the assailant perhaps accounts for the attitud e put fort h b y som e writer s tha t suggest s that wome n tempe r thei r resistance . Thi s then result s i n a condescendin g attitud e bes t exemplifie d i n How to Say No to a Rapist and Survive (Storaska 1975) . In a n attempt t o convinc e wome n t o wai t fo r the prope r momen t t o fight physically , an d t o tal k thei r wa y ou t o f th e assaul t whenever possible , Storask a cautions , If he's skinny , yo u ma y smas h hi s chest . Bu t ho w ar e yo u t o kno w he' s skinny [i f he grab s you fro m behind]—reac h bac k an d feel ? And wha t d o you thin k he'l l b e doin g whil e you'r e hittin g him ? He'l l b e tearin g yo u apart. A t best , you'l l crac k on e o r tw o o f his ribs . That's hardl y incapac itating. Me n can—an d have—playe d a full gam e o f football wit h injurie s much wors e tha n that . A ma n wit h cracke d rib s ca n rap e yo u just abou t as easily as a man whose ribs are perfect, an d he's likely to throw in a beating for goo d measure , sinc e you've bee n violent . (Ibid. , 42 ) That passag e reads less like a n encouragin g promotio n o f women's self-defens e and mor e lik e a stunnin g scar e tactic , furthe r underminin g a woman' s confi dence i n he r abilit y t o fight a man . Storaska i s notorious , a t leas t i n feminis t circles , fo r havin g tol d wome n t o dignify th e assailant as a way to tr y to escap e the assault. Storaska' s advice make s

Balls versus Ovaries | 5 5 sense t o hi m becaus e h e think s tha t "th e r a p i s t . . . i s an angry , emotionall y dis turbed person" (ibid. , 31) . His advice may be appropriate for situations in whic h women ar e confronte d b y a craze d strange r attacking , possibl y wit h inten t t o kill. Th e conventiona l wisdo m o f "don' t figh t back , it'l l onl y ge t hi m angry, " however, doe s no t tak e int o accoun t th e larg e numbe r o f rapes i n whic h me n simply dismis s o r arrogantl y misperceiv e women' s desire s t o refrai n from cer tain sexua l activitie s wit h them . Thu s i t perpetuate s th e myt h tha t rapist s ar e usually psychotic strangers, and ignores the number o f situations in which a man may be testing a woman's boundaries by trying first t o speak with he r and touc h her briefly . Storaska wa s no t th e onl y on e t o offe r thi s typ e o f advic e t o women . The Womanly Art of Self-Defense (Bur g 1979 , 12 ) suggest s creatin g a distractio n o r trying friendl y persuasion , an d cautions , "Don' t enrag e hi m b y suggestin g tha t he i s not capabl e o f completing wha t h e originall y planned . Playin g th e rol e o f a toughi e o r a heroine i s strictly fo r th e movies . I n rea l life , don' t pla y aroun d with a man's pride (o r anyone's pride , fo r tha t matter). " The ploy s that wome n have been tol d t o enac t includ e defecating , urinating , fainting , fakin g a seizure, and vomiting. Every Woman Can (Conro y an d Ritvo 1982 , 96-97) suggest s tha t women tel l thei r "overzealou s dates " tha t the y ma y vomit . Below the Belt: Unarmed Combat for Women tells women , Yes, i t pays to b e deceptive ! Be a n actres s if you mus t be . Someday , Go d forbid, yo u ma y need all of your theatrica l skill s to sav e yourself. I t won' t be nic e t o do , bu t you r childre n wil l stil l hav e thei r mother . You r hus band will still have his wife. And your family wil l not g o out o f their min d with grief . (Steine r 1976 , 108 , emphasis i n original ) Convincing wome n tha t the y shoul d defen d themselve s becaus e o f wha t they ar e wort h t o othe r people , a s in th e citatio n above , come s u p i n anothe r self-defense book . Free to Fight Back (Scribne r 1988 , 9 ) explain s tha t wome n should "tak e car e o f wha t i s valuabl e t o yoursel f an d t o th e Lord : you! " Tar geted t o Christia n women , who m Scribne r (ibid. , 17 ) addresse s a s a grou p whose religiou s beliefs see m incompatible wit h actin g physically in self-defense , the boo k explains , "Eac h Christia n woma n ca n stan d befor e th e Lor d an d believe tha t sh e ha s ful l rights an d responsibilitie s befor e him . Sh e i s a whol e person full y redeeme d b y th e bloo d o f Christ" (ibid. , 8) . The advic e t o wome n i s not homogeneous . Severa l self-defens e book s (e.g. , Bateman 1978 ; Fein 1981 ; Grant 1989 ; Kaufman e t al. 1980 ; Leung 1991 ; Sanford and Fette r 1979 ; Sliw a 1986 ; Smit h 1986 ) diffe r from th e aforementione d rap e prevention advic e and , sometimes , argu e agains t tha t advice . Rathe r tha n

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demeaning wome n wit h suggestion s o f feeding th e eg o o f the assailan t o r keep ing offenders from gettin g angry, they want women t o force offenders aggressivel y to recogniz e women' s humanity , desires , an d anger . Thi s advic e thu s reject s th e standard fiction tha t men assaul t women because of superior size, strength, o r possession o f penise s wit h th e objectiv e capacit y t o b e instrument s o f torture , an d instead assume s men's attack s are gender-motivated . This se t o f advice suggest s tha t wome n tak e u p space , rathe r tha n limi t thei r freedom, i n order to avoid gender-motivated attack . For instance, Attitude: Commonsense Defense for Women (Sliw a 1986 , 31 , 32 ) doe s no t sugges t tha t wome n change th e way they dress, but instead tells women no t t o feel guilt y for th e wa y they loo k o r tak e responsibilit y fo r someon e wh o want s t o tak e advantag e o f them: "I f we wan t t o loo k good , that' s ou r choice . . . . Boldness i s better tha n guilt. Say : 'Yes, I have what a man wants . But th e onl y way h e i s going to ge t i t is if I want t o giv e it to him . I f someone trie s to tak e something from m e agains t my will , I' m goin g t o tak e measure s t o sto p him.' " What make s a man' s attac k a violation, an d wort h preventing , i s therefor e different i n thes e books . Th e bod y i s see n a s a political construct , a s investe d with ideologies , an d a s suc h a s worth defending . (Th e issu e o f ho w feminist s construe th e har m o f rape i s discussed a t length i n chapte r 4. ) Self-defens e con tests th e constructio n o f th e femal e bod y a s violable. I n th e forme r schoo l o f thought, a woman shoul d d o anythin g t o avoi d penetratio n an d death . I n th e latter, a woman shoul d no t le t a man eve n tal k t o he r i n a certain way , a s tha t is part o f th e violation . Hi s assaul t begin s a fight; h e mus t b e mad e t o se e he r ego, her pride, her humanity, an d to know tha t he should not eve n try this wit h her. Fo r example , Attitude: Commonsense Defense for Women suggests , "D o no t romanticize th e criminal . . . . [Criminals ] ar e parasite s wit h a distorted vie w o f reality. I t i s your responsibilit y t o se t the m straigh t b y saying , 'Hey , Jack, you r number's up . I know wha t you'r e thinking , bu t you'l l neve r ge t awa y with it' " (ibid., 33) . Here we se e a completely differen t vie w o f the point o f self-defense . Women ar e t o protec t thei r ow n dignity , no t th e rapist's . Grant's (1989 ) video o n self-defens e fo r women explain s that women ar e no t taught t o fight, onl y t o struggle . Althoug h Gran t als o oppose s th e us e o f weapons fo r self-defens e becaus e they , lik e mal e protectors , ar e "outsid e th e woman," sh e encourages women t o fight an d yell, noting that most women ca n spoil a n attac k verbally . Sh e doe s no t tel l wome n t o scream ; sh e tell s the m t o yell. Th e yellin g tha t In Defense of Ourselves (Sanfor d an d Fette r 1979 ) suggest s incorporates bold , lo w sound s like , "Yaaaahhh " an d "aah. " Are You a Target? (Fein 1981 , 32-33) tell s women t o yel l loudly, somethin g lik e "Yaaah! " an d t o "look mea n an d vicious" doing so. When wome n fight physically , the y ar e tol d

Balls versus Ovaries | 5 7 to d o s o immediately , t o surpris e th e attacker , an d tak e th e uppe r han d i n th e fight. This bod y o f literatur e doe s no t alway s sugges t tha t wome n avoi d usin g weapons for self-defense. I n Fear into Anger: A Manual of Self-Defense forWomen, Bateman (1978 , 93 ) note s th e iron y o f th e doubl e messag e wome n receiv e about weapon use : If you wan t t o protect yourself, you wil l need a gun becaus e you're s o weak; o n th e othe r hand , yo u bette r no t us e a gun becaus e a man wil l take i t awa y an d us e i t agains t you . In Defense of Ourselves (Sanford an d Fette r 1979, 128 ) simpl y suggest s tha t "i f you us e a weapon, b e well-traine d i n it s us e and b e willin g t o us e i t immediately. ,, Self Defense: The Womanly Art of SelfCare, Intuition, and Choice (Leung 1991 , 115 ) suggest s tha t wome n conside r th e commitment t o learnin g an d practicin g t o us e th e weapon , a s well a s the emo tional and legal issues involved. Tha t boo k als o suggests that a woman wh o use s her weapo n a s soon a s she show s i t durin g a n assaul t "wil l mos t likel y defen d herself successfully." Attitude: Commonsense Defense for Women (Sliw a 1986 , 77 ) says not t o rel y o n a gun becaus e you migh t no t ge t t o i t fast enough , bu t a s for fighting arme d assailants , "jus t becaus e a criminal ha s a weapon doe s no t mea n that h e ha s t o ge t hi s way. " Th e autho r suggest s th e woma n vampirishl y sin k her teet h int o hi s jugular vein , a technique tha t migh t kil l him . There ar e a variety of ways, then, i n which women' s relationshi p t o violenc e has been articulated . A s attempts t o ge t women t o restructur e thei r relationshi p to aggression—bot h men' s aggressio n an d thei r own—thes e set s o f advic e reveal wha t w e hav e take n fo r grante d abou t gende r an d aggression , a s well a s what som e hav e trie d t o challenge . I n contemporar y self-defens e courses , women ar e learning t o restructur e thei r experience s o f their bodie s t o fight of f all kinds o f attack .

Conclusion Fantasies o f sex difference s ar e inscripte d ont o ou r bodie s i n demeanor , looks , shape, size , fashion codes , an d aestheti c tastes . Insofa r a s our bodie s functio n a s signs fo r understandin g socia l relationships , the y displa y thos e differences , a notable distinction being aggression. Women's aggressio n is treated a s an unnat ural an d distastefu l transgressio n becaus e aggressio n i s a marker o f sexual differ ence, whic h i s made meaningfu l i n a hierarchy o f social power . Aggression falls outside th e bounds o f "ladylike " behavior. Thi s prescriptiv e femininity itsel f has generate d a series o f exclusions , a s privileged middle-clas s white heterosexua l wome n ca n mor e easil y accomplis h it . Mos t women , wh o

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cannot, ca n fee l inadequate , wrong , bad , ugly , unlovable , sick , perverted , o r selfish. Eve n thos e wome n wh o achiev e femininit y accru e n o grea t rewards , given tha t th e idea l forms o f femininity mar k th e idea l o f female subordinatio n to men . The idea l o f femininit y ha s normalize d an d thu s perpetuate d rap e cultur e because, insofar a s femininity exclude s aggression, women ar e set up t o be easy , and easil y rationalized, target s for abuse . Even wome n wh o challenge d gender , historically speaking , hav e bee n hel d accountabl e fo r thei r "unfeminine " actions. Aggression, then , i s a primary axi s around whic h prescriptiv e feminin ity, racism , compulsor y heterosexuality , an d mal e violenc e revolve . Th e nex t chapter describe s th e thril l o f unlearning prescriptiv e femininit y i n a variety o f self-defense courses .

2 Getting Mea n I On the Scene in Self-Defense Classes

Self-defense course s mak e visibl e women' s embodimen t o f femi nine helplessness and its undoing; thus , they ar e important site s for studying the renegotiation o f femininit y an d aggression . Thi s chapte r describe s th e self defense course s tha t I experience d a s a studen t an d observer . Self-defens e courses rang e fro m brief , inexpensiv e (sometime s free ) classe s offere d throug h martial art s dojo s o r rap e crisi s center s t o expensiv e twenty-fiv e hou r course s and martia l art s ran k o r degre e programs . Self-defens e classe s fal l withi n fou r broad categories : padded attacke r courses ; firearms courses ; martial art s or mar tial-arts oriente d self-defens e courses ; and fitness-oriented courses . Mos t o f the self-defense course s ar e fo r wome n only , althoug h I discus s on e self-defens e class, Kra v Maga , whic h containe d a n equa l numbe r o f male an d femal e stu dents.

Padded Attacker Courses "Hey, Martha , I know yo u from th e university. I was in your sociol ogy class, " says the man casually . "I see, " I respond. "Well , I' m in a hurry t o ge t somewhere now. " "Just wai t a minute. I'v e alway s wante d t o tel l yo u ho w attracte d t o you I was. Maybe w e coul d ge t together. " "I don' t thin k so. N o ." At this point I raise my hands casually to a protective position s o that I can protect m y face o r strike his if necessary. My legs are shoulder-width apar t an d pivoting s o that I' m alway s facing him. I quickl y loo k aroun d t o see if anyone els e is in the area . He touche s m y arm, urging, " I though t yo u liked me." "Don't com e an y closer, " I sa y firmly. Thi s i s the intens e part . I f he persists, I have t o mak e a decision t o fight . An d if I make thi s decision , I have t o be prepared t o continu e fightin g t o th e knockout . He step s closer, tryin g to put an arm around me . I deliver a heel-palm

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strike up hi s nose, and, just a s his head tip s back, I knee hi m i n th e groin . He double s ove r momentarily , an d I dro p t o th e groun d o n m y side , ready t o kic k hi m i n th e head . He lunge s fo r me . "Dam n you , bitch ! You brok e m y nose. " "KICK! KICK ! KICK! " Severa l blow s t o hi s hea d knoc k hi m out . I get up, look aroun d me , assess the assailant , see that he is indeed knocke d out, ru n t o safety , an d shou t "9-1-1"—th e officia l en d o f the fight. This wa s one o f my fights a t Model Mugging , on e o f a number o f women' s self-defense program s tha t teac h technique s fo r unarmed , usuall y nonlethal , self-defense an d involv e practice agains t a padded attacker . Alon g with a doze n other women, I enrolled in the basic course of Model Mugging, knowing noth ing about it. Model Muggin g is perhaps the most famous, intensive , and expen sive cours e o f its kind . My cours e take s plac e i n a larg e martia l art s doj o i n a n aluminum-side d garage-warehouse i n Souther n California . I walk int o a small waiting are a an d office, wit h a television an d vide o camer a tha t ar e sometime s use d t o tap e an d watch the fights. The roo m is one large square of blue mats, with two big garage doors alon g on e side . Hangin g fro m th e hig h ceiling s ar e punchin g bags , an d scattered aroun d th e ma t ar e knee an d elbo w pads , padded helmets , an d every one's lunc h bag s an d wate r bottles . The wome n ar e wearin g casua l gy m clothe s an d gathe r aroun d th e ma t t o stretch ou t an d talk . Th e me n ge t int o thei r padde d suits . Dressed a s the mug gers—with paddin g strappe d an d duct-tape d everywher e an d the n covere d with footbal l jerseys an d deni m overalls , plu s a large helme t wit h nettin g ove r the eye s (s o student s ca n strik e th e eye s an d delive r ful l forc e blow s t o th e head)—the me n weig h aroun d tw o hundre d pounds . Thei r helmet s hav e names on them , differen t from thei r real names, distinguishin g th e me n i n thei r role a s muggers from th e me n the y "reall y are. " Founded in 197 1 by Matt Thomas , who als o helped train local police SWA T teams (Per i 1990) , Mode l Mugging , wit h affiliate s i n sixtee n state s an d on e i n Quebec, Canada , ha s trained ten s of thousands o f women nationwid e a s well as police officers , children , men , an d th e physicall y challenged . Th e women' s basic cours e cost s $420 and consist s of twenty-five hour s o f instruction, o n sev eral differen t days , usually sprea d ou t ove r a month . Model Muggin g course s ar e taugh t b y women an d men , th e forme r usuall y teaching th e skill s an d takin g car e o f students ' emotiona l need s an d th e latte r doing th e muggin g an d occasionall y givin g feedbac k o n students ' techniques . The femal e instructors , on e Latin a an d th e other s white , al l in thei r thirtie s o r forties, ofte n hav e counselin g background s an d hav e complete d instructo r

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training in addition t o all levels of the Model Mugging courses. Some have mar tial arts trainin g a s well. Th e mal e instructors , on e Latino , on e white , an d on e black, al l i n thei r thirtie s o r forties , hav e traine d i n variou s martia l arts . On e male instructor who co-ra n th e Model Muggin g program I attended wa s a martial art s instructo r an d Vietna m veteran , anothe r wa s a polic e officer , an d another a self-employe d weapon s instructor , bodyguard , an d surveillanc e expert. Padded attacke r course s offe r wome n a chanc e t o experienc e full-forc e fighting, a s thes e self-defens e instructor s believ e tha t mos t successfu l assault s occur no t becaus e wome n aren' t stron g enoug h t o fight me n bu t becaus e women facin g a n assailan t ofte n freez e u p rathe r tha n fight. Becaus e th e "mug gers" attac k th e student s a t ful l forc e an d accompan y thei r attack s wit h affronting verba l remarks ("compliments, " threats , sexual profanity, an d crie s o f pain), th e attack s fee l quit e rea l t o th e students . Thi s enable s wome n t o lear n their defense technique s while their adrenaline level is high and their fine moto r skills low, thu s committin g th e skill s to "bodil y memory " whic h wil l automat ically be triggere d i n th e even t o f an attack . Much o f the clas s time tha t i s not use d fo r practicin g specifi c strikin g tech niques an d fighting of f padded attacker s i s used t o "process " what i s happenin g emotionally. Eac h clas s begin s an d end s wit h th e student s circlin g u p an d "checking in " emotionally . Som e wome n ar e takin g th e clas s a t a therapist' s recommendation, other s becaus e the y ar e bein g stalke d b y a n ex-lover , stil l others becaus e the y liv e alone . On e woma n receive d th e cours e a s a high school graduatio n gift . Som e wome n hav e know n abou t Mode l Muggin g fo r years and are now finding th e courage t o take it. As a box o f Kleenex gets passed around th e circle , som e wome n shar e thei r tearfu l storie s o f chil d abuse , rape , and battery . Other s shar e thei r everyda y fear s o f rape , an d ange r a t tha t fear' s constricting effect s i n thei r lives . The instructors , two women an d two mal e muggers, take time to tell us wh y we nee d t o fight. "It' s a concrete jungle ou t there, " explain s on e o f th e mug gers who occasionall y joins th e women' s circle . They als o encourage u s to pro tect ourselves : "Thin k o f ho w th e mothe r anima l i n th e wil d protect s he r babies." If you don' t hav e a child, instructors explain , "imagin e protectin g you r 'child within.' " Th e instructor s als o pass out variou s handout s wit h empower ing slogans like, "It' s no t th e siz e o f the woma n i n th e fight, bu t th e siz e of th e fight i n th e woman, " an d "Women' s Bil l o f Rights," whic h i s a list o f affirma tions abou t havin g th e righ t t o sa y no, havin g th e righ t t o mak e a mistake, an d so on . The cours e include s thi s emotiona l processin g an d encouragemen t becaus e

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mock assault s traumatiz e th e women . Fo r th e sam e reason , th e fighting start s out slowly . W e lear n strikin g technique s o n punchin g bag s first, an d graduall y work u p t o kicking the muggers. The first time we actuall y strike a mugger, w e act out a tightly scripte d scenari o i n slo w motion. W e ar e encourage d t o giv e a kick o r punc h t o th e padde d attacke r whil e h e remain s stationary , bu t wome n never us e ful l forc e a t thi s initia l stage . Som e eve n apologiz e t o th e mugger , worried tha t they hurt him . Som e o f my classmate s initially fold unde r th e pres sure of the fight, to o fearful, to o shocked , to o horrifie d t o continue . Som e sim ply freeze whe n th e mugger knocks them t o the ground, other s cry or feel faint . For a moment , on e studen t revert s t o a childlik e mode , sobbin g i n th e feta l position on the mat. Traumatic events , including molestation, battery, and rape, produce i n people lastin g changes i n physiological arousal , emotion , cognition , and memor y (Herma n 1992 , 34) . Constriction— a numbin g respons e o f sur render i n th e fac e o f rea l o r imagine d threat—i s a primar y sympto m o f post traumatic stres s disorde r (ibid.) . The developmen t o f th e wil l t o fight, th e determinatio n t o battl e t o th e knockout, i s th e primar y goa l o f th e basi c course . Bu t befor e w e ca n ge t th e fight, w e mus t sto p worryin g abou t hurtin g th e mugger . Som e eve n hav e t o learn t o sto p smilin g a t th e mugger s durin g fights. Other s mus t practic e usin g their voic e a s they fight. On e woma n say s tha t sh e wa s sayin g n o fo r th e first time. A strikingl y confiden t athlet e break s dow n crying , explainin g tha t learn ing t o fen d of f assailant s i s a greate r challeng e tha n runnin g a maratho n o r climbing a mountain . Students eventuall y ge t "th e fight" o r "th e fighting spirit " s o tha t the y wil l not freez e i n respons e t o mal e aggression . A s eac h clas s goe s by , althoug h women d o no t see m eage r t o skirmis h wit h thei r padde d muggers , thei r confi dence tha t the y ca n graduall y step s up . "You r as s is mine today! " on e woma n warns the mugger. W e eventuall y ge t used t o usin g our full bod y weight i n ou r strikes an d usin g ou r voice s forcefully . W e lear n t o yel l th e technique s w e us e ("KICK!" "KNEE! " " G R O I N ! " "EYES!" ) o r t o simpl y ye U " N O ! " a s w e fight. Thi s i s t o ensur e tha t w e continu e t o breath e durin g th e fights, tha t w e intimidate ou r assailant , an d tha t w e ge t th e attentio n o f anyone i n th e area . As we practice our self-defense move s in these lifelike scenarios , the rest of the class stands on th e sidelines of the huge mat an d yells out th e moves students ca n use: "KICK!" "GE T HI S EYES! " " G R O I N ! " (Se e ill. 1. ) The assaul t scenarios progress in degree of complication, th e number o f ways in whic h w e ar e approache d (passin g b y o n th e street , gettin g grabbe d fro m behind o r front , startin g wit h a conversation, i n bed , etc.) , an d th e amoun t o f verbal abus e an d threat s tha t g o wit h them . A majo r hurdl e i s learning t o sta y

Getting Mean | 6 3 centered an d fight whil e a ma n shout s "yo u fuckin g bitch, " o r graduall y encroaches you r boundarie s whil e saying , " I just wan t t o tal k t o yo u fo r a second, pretty lady." Indeed , whe n th e attac k was accompanied b y verbal "friend liness," w e al l tende d t o wai t longe r befor e strikin g th e assailan t tha n durin g blitz attacks . Women i n Mode l Muggin g lear n tha t matchin g a rapist verbally , without eve r gettin g physical, will usuall y stop a rape attempt . Hence , whil e al l of our moc k assault s involve a fight to th e finish, w e practic e verbal self-defens e along th e way , learnin g tha t i n rea l lif e thi s itsel f i s usuall y enoug h t o sto p a n assailant. Thu s w e practice , ove r an d over , defendin g ourselve s verball y an d physically, fro m a stiff "BAC K OFF " t o a knockout blow . The fights ar e scrappy , an d w e lear n t o strik e wher e w e se e a n ope n target . What a t first is an establishe d fight patter n (yel l " N O ! " bite , elbo w t o th e face , turn, an d kick ) become s a viciousl y opportunisti c fighting styl e i n whic h th e woman see s an unprotecte d crotc h an d ha s one han d fre e wit h whic h t o strik e it, o r i f not a hand the n a foot o r a knee, the n migh t ge t t o anothe r targe t are a by strikin g th e eye s (ey e strike s ca n caus e th e attacke r t o brin g hi s hand s u p t o his eyes , leavin g hi s ches t o r groi n are a ope n fo r strikes) , al l th e whil e yellin g and breathin g an d goin g ballisti c unti l h e i s knocke d out . (Se e ill . 2. ) Th e knockout i s signaled when th e padde d attacker , afte r enoug h pressur e ha s bee n delivered t o hi s head , place s hi s padde d hand s ove r hi s eye s an d th e instructo r blows he r whistle . W e als o lear n t o negotiat e wit h th e assailan t i f we ge t pinned , an d t o dis tract hi m whe n w e wan t t o creat e a n opening . Fo r instance , a woman migh t say, "I' m sorry , I just go t scared, " onl y t o coi l u p he r energy , quickl y retrac t her le g an d kic k hi s knee , bit e hi s penis , o r hur l hi m of f he r bod y wit h a hi p throw. The trainin g atmospher e i s supportive ; wome n bon d throug h th e ordeal . This mutua l suppor t i s structured int o th e clas s as well; befor e a new roun d o f muggings, th e clas s circles up, arm s aroun d on e another , t o ge t psyched fo r th e fights. O n th e coun t o f three, everyon e stomp s he r foo t an d yells , " N O ! N O ! N O ! " Th e wome n connec t a s they support th e on e fighting o n th e mat, yellin g for th e fighter an d "passin g hugs" dow n th e lin e o f students. Wome n ofte n ge t a hu g afte r a fight an d a t th e en d o f class . Th e femal e instructor s giv e ou t th e students' home phone number s as well as their own, encouragin g us to call people fo r suppor t durin g th e day s between classes . More boxe s o f Kleenex g o aroun d ou r circles . Women shar e thei r fears , stil l others thei r ange r a t the "littl e everyda y assaults " like harassmen t an d intimida tion. Som e student s find i t difficul t t o continu e th e course , a s they ar e remem bering painfu l experiences . Other s wh o ha d no t bee n attacke d befor e fee l lik e

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the cours e i s making the m fac e thei r wors t nightmares . W e al l let ou t a collec tive groa n whe n w e realiz e w e hav e t o fac e th e mugger' s crotch . A s w e ar e introduced t o the defensive move s against oral copulation (a s in ill. 3), one classmate turns to me quietl y an d vomits up th e words, "Thi s is what my father use d to d o t o me. " Th e circle s allo w wome n t o tal k abou t wha t i t wa s like t o b e i n the fights , asses s ou r progres s i n th e class , an d discus s wha t skill s w e nee d t o improve. If the mal e instructor s hea r a student mentio n somethin g sh e is most afrai d of, the y enac t tha t personality , talk , o r for m o f threa t i n thei r nex t moc k assault o n tha t woman . A Latin a studen t sai d hearin g threat s i n Spanis h wa s particularly difficult , promptin g on e o f th e mugger s t o spea k Spanis h a s h e attacked her . W e writ e dow n ou r ow n custo m assaul t scenarios—ou r wors t fears o r perhap s a situation involvin g a fighting techniqu e w e fee l leas t con fident about—whic h th e mugger s rea d an d the n ac t ou t wit h us . Som e women wan t t o ac t ou t assault s the y ha d actuall y experience d i n th e past , symbolically reclaimin g th e powe r tha t tha t perso n ha d take n away . I fel t I needed th e mos t practic e makin g a decision t o defen d mysel f against a know n assailant whos e verba l gesture s d o no t matc h hi s physica l ones . M y custo m scenario thu s involve d a ma n I kno w wh o i s threatenin g m e implicitl y bu t not explicitly . I had t o trus t m y sens e that I was in danger an d neede d t o fight , despite m y tendenc y t o giv e weigh t t o hi s words an d hi s definitio n o f the sit uation. "Don't com e an y closer, " I say firmly. "I just want to talk to you," th e mugger says gendy while touching me . I look around . It' s just h e an d I . "Ge t away, " I insist . But h e i s equall y insisten t o n gettin g closer : "C'mon , darlin' , we'r e cool," h e say s while h e come s afte r m e an d presse s his body t o mine . Having realize d tha t h e i s no t listenin g t o m e an d no t backin g off , I interrupt wit h a " N O" an d a heel-palm strik e t o hi s nose . He trie s t o gai n contro l o f me physically , pushin g m e t o th e ground . I dro p intentionally , wit h m y foo t cocke d read y t o giv e a side-thrus t kick. "Sta y back! " He dart s aroun d fo r a moment, cursing . "Go away! " I demand, repositionin g m y bod y s o that I' m alway s fac ing hi m wit h a retracted le g and cocke d foot . He lunge s in, and I kick hi s head. H e stumbles , then grab s my leg. Hi s groin i s ope n an d I com e dow n o n i t wit h m y fists lik e a hammer. Th e pain has made hi m release my leg, so I scoot back, retrac t my leg and kic k his head thre e mor e time s unti l he' s knocke d out .

Getting Mean | 6 5 Of cours e i n real lif e th e verba l self-defens e alon e migh t wel l b e enoug h to scare off an assailant. But the course trains us for the worst, and the muggers ofte n do no t wal k awa y afte r w e hav e belte d ou t th e mos t firm words . Thes e in-clas s enactments ar e real enough. Feelin g threatened b y th e mugge r tryin g t o pin m e down an d feelin g hi s swea t spra y ont o m y fac e mak e m e determine d t o fight through t o th e knockou t a s quickly a s possible. After knockin g ou t th e assailant , we ar e trained t o look fo r other threats . S o in class , whe n anothe r mugge r approaches th e scene , w e yel l fiercely a t him, too , in case he's anothe r attacker : I just finish knockin g ou t on e gu y and, a s trained, I assess the situation , making sur e he' s knocke d ou t b y stompin g m y foo t nea r hi s hea d (i f h e is merely stunned, I would the n grin d his face into the ground), and look ing around m e for escap e and possible threats . That's when anothe r mug ger approaches . "Hey ar e you alright? " "Back off" "Hey I' m just tryin g t o help , lady. " "Stay away from me! " I run t o the end o f the line of students, and wit h a classmate' s comfortin g ar m aroun d me , yel l "9-1-1! " Once I forgo t t o set a boundar y wit h a mugge r o n the sideline, s o h e attacked m e and I ha d t o finish th e fight wit h hi m too . Afte r that , I alway s remembered t o look aroun d m e afte r m y fight, an d t o be wary o f anyone offer ing wha t appear s t o be innocent help . On e woma n forgo t t o make sur e the mugger wa s actuall y knocke d out . H e got up , wen t afte r her , an d sh e ha d to fight hi m agai n t o the knockout . Mode l Muggin g i s conducte d i n this sor t of military fashion , whic h assume s that we wil l reall y learn whe n w e ar e forced to face th e consequence s o f ou r mistakes . An d w e did . B y th e en d o f the course , women kno w thei r moves , an d ar e shoutin g an d fighting bac k lik e a rapist's worst nightmare: " G E T YOU R HAND S OF F M E YO U FUCKIN G ASSHOLE ! STA Y TH E FUCK AWA Y FRO M M E ! "

After severa l suc h rehearsal s o f kicking, poking , jabbing, an d yelling , w e al l had "th e fight." I felt different , tougher , an d realize d ho w littl e I had forcefull y set boundarie s wit h m y voic e in the past . B y th e en d o f th e basi c course , eac h woman ha s bee n mugge d fifteen o r twenty times . Th e wome n wh o encoun tered muggings that were simila r to their own experience(s ) o f prior assaults said they fel t goo d t o win thi s time . Still , though , i t is emotionally tryin g t o g o through thes e scenarios . Man y o f us enter th e thir d an d fourt h classe s dreadin g our nex t muggings . W e leave exhausted , draine d fro m suc h physicall y and emotionally intens e fights.

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Model Mugging News, no w calle d Self-Defense and Empowerment News, i s a quarterly publicatio n abou t th e class , containin g instructo r profile s an d new s about wome n an d violenc e aroun d th e world . I n th e publication , wome n proudly shar e thei r succes s storie s afte r gettin g attacke d an d defendin g them selves. Som e o f these storie s ar e conveye d i n class . The followin g i s from SelfDefense and Empowerment News: While I was putting the last book i n the drop , he grabbe d m y ar m an d ordered m e t o com e wit h hi m an d ge t i n hi s car . I sai d " N o . " He began angrily calling me a "cunt, tease, and stuck-up bitch who need s to be knocked up " . . . and a lot of other thing s I can't remembe r now . As h e loosene d hi s gri p t o tur n m e around , I hi t hi m squar e i n th e Adam's appl e a s hard a s I could wit h m y elbow . He staggere d back, gasping. When h e brought hi s hand dow n fro m hi s neck t o com e a t m e again , I notice d tha t hi s nec k wa s alread y swellin g and discoloring. As he lunged towar d m e I kicked of f my heel s and stoo d with m y knee s ben t an d bot h hand s u p i n a protective stance , s o tha t I could strik e o r dro p t o th e ground i f necessary. H e the n bega n tellin g m e what h e wa s goin g t o d o t o me . I didn't focus o n what he was saying because it was all verbal abuse. But when h e sai d that afte r h e wa s finished wit h m e h e wa s going t o giv e m e to hi s friends , I fel t a sudden surg e o f anger. . . . I tol d hi m strongl y an d convincingly tha t I was prepared t o d o whatever i t took t o protect myself . He responde d by calling me a "good looking piece of ass" and a "feist y bitch I' d lik e t o brea k i n bed," an d the n h e said : "Bu t I' m to o tire d no w . . . and I don' t hav e th e time! " An d wit h that , h e left . (Self-Defense and Empowerment News, 6 , no . 2 [Summer/Fal l 1992] : 3) Men figure i n thes e storie s a s beatable, o r a t least vulnerable , poser s o f strengt h and brutality . Wome n emerg e a s victorious fighters. An d that' s ho w w e fee l a s class comes t o a n end . The cours e end s wit h graduatio n i n whic h supporter s ar e invite d t o com e watch th e combat portion o f the last class. The mugging s are videotaped an d w e can bu y copie s o f th e tap e fo r twent y dollars . Afterward , th e clas s alon e share s gifts o f food, poetry , an d song . Student s receiv e certificate s o f completion fro m the wome n instructor s an d rose s from th e me n instructors . O n graduatio n day , I watched tw o mugger s pull onto th e mat and attack on e of m y femal e instructors , completel y of f guard . Sh e stoppe d the m bot h s o impressively tha t I thought t o myself—despit e th e fac t tha t m y chanc e o f bein g attacked b y mor e tha n on e assailan t i s relatively slim— I wan t t o kno w ho w t o

Getting Mean | 6 7 do that . S o I went o n t o tak e th e multipl e assailant s course , i n whic h student s learn t o fight of f u p t o five attackers , an d the n th e weapon s course , i n whic h students lear n t o fight of f a n attacke r wieldin g a gun , knife , o r club . Thes e advanced classes , while the y involve mor e instructor s an d cos t six hundred dol lars each , procee d alon g th e sam e line s a s the first course . Th e primar y differ ence i s that wome n begi n t o lear n t o contro l thei r energ y level s an d strategiz e more durin g fights. Som e o f the women wh o wer e i n my basic course too k th e second cours e becaus e th e first Mode l Muggin g cours e di d s o muc h fo r the m emotionally, helpin g the m t o fee l empowere d i n al l aspect s o f thei r lives , i n addition t o increasin g their sense o f security whe n alon e a t night o r with a ma n on a date. Other s stil l felt incapabl e o f protecting themselve s i n a wider variet y of scenarios an d wante d furthe r training . Stil l other s wante d th e physica l chal lenge tha t th e mor e advance d level s o f instruction woul d bring . Defending Ourselve s i s a Sa n Francisc o Ba y are a cours e base d o n a seventy year-old polic e an d militar y combativ e syste m tha t include s fighting wit h a padded attacker . Founde d i n 199 1 by Helen Griec o an d Patrick Phair , Defend ing Ourselve s ha s traine d ove r tw o thousan d women . Griec o an d Phai r als o offer self-defens e instructio n t o wome n i n battere d women' s shelter s an d i n other communit y arenas . Grieco an d Phair's Defending Ourselve s introductor y course i s a $290 forty-hou r progra m tha t take s place ove r twelv e weeks . Ther e are twelv e student s pe r class , an d the y hav e a studen t budd y system , sharin g phone number s t o suppor t on e another . Defending Ourselve s offer s thre e level s o f training : (1 ) introductor y (safet y awareness, dange r assessment , strategie s t o avoi d assault , verba l assertiveness , physical self-defense , an d respons e t o attac k wit h weapons) ; (2 ) multipl e assailants (defens e agains t multipl e attackers) ; and (3 ) weapons (thei r use in self defense, includin g bludgeo n an d edge d weapons , sprays an d devices , an d firearms). Th e introductor y cours e spend s on e thir d o f clas s tim e i n buildin g awareness wit h feminis t discussion s abou t sexua l violence , on e thir d i n skil l building, an d on e thir d i n simulate d assaul t scenarios . I t teache s som e letha l techniques an d involve s som e instructio n i n self-defens e agains t a n arme d assailant. Defendin g Ourselve s ha s students practic e les s with verba l abus e tha n Model Muggin g students , and , unlik e Mode l Mugging , doe s no t pus h wome n to d o thing s the y ar e no t read y for , insistin g tha t honorin g women' s nos in th e class is healing fo r them . The cours e i s taught i n a large roo m i n th e Women' s Communit y Buildin g of San Francisco . It s hardwood floor an d hig h ceilin g recal l th e indoo r basket ball cour t o f a hig h schoo l gym . A smal l portio n o f th e floor i s covere d wit h

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mats an d hangin g fro m on e wal l i s a large padde d dummy . Grieco , a dynami c white woma n i n he r forties , wear s he r hai r lon g an d straight , an d sport s a T shirt tha t reads , "Feminis m i s the radica l ide a tha t wome n ar e huma n beings. " She ha s bee n a N O W activis t sinc e 198 4 an d ha s a master s degre e i n clinica l psychology, wit h a n emphasi s i n feminis t therap y an d education . Griec o offer s free counselin g t o th e wome n whil e the y g o throug h he r clas s an d sometime s spends an hou r o n th e phon e wit h a student processin g th e issue s that com e u p during th e training . I n additio n t o doin g som e o f th e lecture s fo r th e course , Phair work s a s the simulate d perpetrator , wearin g paddin g unde r blac k moto r cycle an d equestria n cras h gea r mad e o f plastics an d foam , toppe d wit h a hel met. "MAN W I T H A KNIFE ! SOMEBOD Y CAL L 9-1-1 ! M A N W I T H A KNIFE!" eac h traine e holler s a s she dodge s th e chargin g arme d attacker . Th e assault scenario s simulat e fightin g a n attacke r wh o i s standing , seated , o n th e ground wit h you , o r ha s pushed yo u t o th e ground—i n th e ligh t an d th e dark . Here th e wome n shriek , grabbin g th e attacker' s hea d an d piercin g hi s eardru m with high-pitched scream s directly into the ear. It took m e a few minute s to ge t used t o women's high-pitche d voice s because i n Model Muggin g I had learne d to thro w deep , ster n word s a t th e assailants . Th e wome n her e screa m merci lessly an d scratc h a t th e assailant' s face . Afte r knockin g hi m out , eac h studen t runs t o th e safet y o f he r cheerin g classmate s an d call s ou t "9-1-1. " Griec o instructs women no t to mention thei r self-defense trainin g to police at the scen e of assault , suggestin g tha t instea d the y say , "H e assaulte d m e an d I wan t a lawyer." Griec o tol d m e tha t sh e and Phair educat e student s o n th e law , an d it s gender bia s in courts , with th e police , an d wit h respec t t o th e "reasonabl e per son" standard . Additionally, wherea s th e Mode l Muggin g mugger s maintai n thei r mugge r status mos t o f the tim e an d neve r spea k t o th e student s whe n the y ar e wearin g their helmets, the male instructor o f Defending Ourselve s slip s in and ou t o f his roles a s assailan t an d instructo r b y commentin g o n th e technique s durin g an d after fights, an d get s involve d wit h Hele n i n th e supportiv e wor k throughou t the class . Defending Ourselve s student s engag e i n emotiona l processin g a s needed — unlike Mode l Mugging , the y g o fro m figh t t o figh t withou t circlin g u p t o process what' s goin g on . Griec o unapologeticall y point s ou t students ' mis takes, figurin g tha t outsid e th e classroo m i t migh t b e a matte r o f lif e an d death. A s th e fina l clas s ends , th e wome n receiv e certificate s immediately , take a clas s photograph , than k Griec o an d Phai r briefly , an d arrang e gettin g home. Bravin g th e street s o f Sa n Francisc o alon e a t nigh t i s no t a n expecta -

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tion upo n graduation ; Griec o an d Phai r mak e sur e everyon e ha s a wal k o r ride t o he r parke d car . Impact, taugh t i n severa l state s i n th e Unite d States , an d SafeSkills , o f Durham, Nort h Carolina , ar e othe r padde d attacke r course s fo r women . Chimera offer s a simila r cours e bu t oppose s th e presenc e o f a liv e padde d attacker. Student s hi t pads and dummie s instead , a s the instructor s believ e tha t women shoul d tak e self-defens e i n a women-onl y environmen t an d shoul d not hav e t o reliv e assault s or conten d wit h verba l abuse , since the y experienc e that regularl y i n thei r dail y lives . Chimer a wa s create d i n Chicag o an d i s spreading throughou t th e Unite d State s a s it s instructor s mov e aroun d th e country. Anothe r course , Blin d Ambition , i s specificall y fo r blin d people , who ar e frequent target s o f violence becaus e the y see m defenseless . Th e blin d students ar e taugh t thei r strength s i n listenin g an d reactin g quickly . Usin g sounds t o detec t th e motion s an d siz e o f thei r opponent , playe d b y a padde d mock assailant , student s practic e disablin g strike s t o hi s head , throat , an d groin.

Firearms Courses Stance. Aim. Lin e up th e sights. Finger o n th e trigger . Squeeze . The kic k through m y shoulde r an d back isn' t s o bad. H o w exhilaratin g t o hea r th e loud explosio n o f th e gun , t o smel l th e gunpowder , an d realiz e I ha d done thi s thing tha t ha d seeme d s o forbidden, i f for n o othe r reaso n tha n my ow n feminis t principles . My firs t gu n lesso n bega n wit h a cal l t o a Souther n Californi a gu n rang e I looked u p i n th e Yellow Pages. I simpl y calle d an d aske d ho w I coul d lear n t o use a handgun . Th e ma n o n th e phon e sai d tha t wome n ten d t o tak e lesson s from thei r femal e instructor , Elain e ( a pseudonym), an d h e gav e m e he r hom e phone number . I calle d her , an d sh e arrange d t o mee t m e a t th e rang e tha t week. Sh e offered t o let me us e her gun, warnin g m e no t t o g o to th e gu n stor e by mysel f t o purchas e one . Sh e explaine d tha t th e me n a t th e stor e woul d no t treat m e respectfull y an d that , i f I' d lik e t o purchas e a gun , sh e offere d a s on e of her service s t o accompan y wome n t o th e gu n dealer . I spen t thre e an d a half hour s wit h Elain e a t th e range . Instructor s mus t b e certified wit h th e Nationa l Rifl e Associatio n t o teac h handgu n lesson s a t th e gun club . Elain e charge s twent y dollar s fo r al l th e instructio n an d donate s thi s

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money t o th e club . Sh e teache s abou t on e woma n pe r wee k i n th e us e o f a handgun fo r self-defense . Elain e describe s hersel f as "the toke n woman " a t th e club, whic h mean s sh e doe s al l th e cookin g an d barbecuin g whe n shootin g competitions ar e held there . "Bu t I don't mind, " sh e says cheerfully. A marrie d mother i n he r forties , sh e appear s t o b e a mixtur e o f Caucasia n an d Africa n American (althoug h sh e di d not revea l her racial/ethni c identity) . Sh e has bee n a gun enthusias t eve r since her husban d too k he r t o th e shootin g rang e on e da y when othe r socia l plan s ha d falle n through . N o w sh e i s a competitiv e targe t shooter. Sh e doe s no t hunt . Elaine say s that it' s scarie r t o teac h wome n tha n me n ho w t o us e handgun s because wome n wil l fire fiv e o r si x rounds a t an attacker , whil e a man wil l sto p at on e o r two . He r explanatio n fo r this : "Al l tha t ange r come s up. " Sh e note s that it is illegal to carry a concealed weapon i n California, bu t tha t many wome n do an d i t gives " a fals e sens e o f security." Sh e say s that i f she were livin g alone , she'd hav e a shotgun i n th e fron t close t an d a handgu n i n th e bedroom . (Bu t she suggest s thi s onl y i f a woman i s sure sh e won' t freez e u p i n a n emergency , in whic h cas e a burglar coul d ge t t o th e shotgu n first. ) Before I ge t th e gu n i n m y hand , Elain e note s th e fea r o f gun s tha t sh e observes in many o f the women sh e instructs. A true hoplophobe myself , I have never sho t o r eve n hel d a gu n before . Fortunately , Elain e ease s m y fear s b y explaining th e safet y rule s o f the range . Fear s o f being kille d b y rando m fir e a t the range subside as I realize what stric t codes of conduct everyon e observes . As we pu t o n ou r ey e an d ea r protection, Elain e assure s me tha t th e bulle t b y itsel f cannot hur t anyone , even if she were t o throw i t down ont o th e ground. I actually d o nee d t o hea r that . Sh e show s m e a safe-handling techniqu e an d ho w t o load th e bullet s int o th e revolver . She i s very calmin g as I get in place t o shoo t th e gu n a t the target . Sh e help s me lin e u p th e sight s and remind s m e t o kee p bot h eye s ope n (a s in ill . 4). Fee t apart. Shoulder s relaxed . Breathe . Finge r o n th e trigger . Squeeze . P O W ! I a m surprised tha t my first sho t actually makes it onto th e target across the field. An d that I don' t dro p Elaine' s gu n a s it goe s off . Thi s i s an immediat e confidence booster. Apparently , I am doin g quite wel l for a beginner; on e o f my firs t thre e shots nearl y hit s th e bull' s eye . Elain e explain s tha t "wome n ar e bette r marks men" tha n men . Thi s i s because , i n he r view , men' s hip s ar e to o narro w t o enable goo d balance . Furthermore , wome n ten d t o b e bette r shot s i n a tense , high adrenalin e situation ; accordin g t o Elaine , thi s i s due t o "hormone s com bined wit h adrenaline. " I fire a few mor e round s fro m he r Lad y Smith— a cut e little revolve r wit h a pearlized handle , Smit h an d Wesson's first "ladies " mode l handgun.

Getting Mean | 7 1 Next w e hea d t o th e shotgu n range . Elaine warns me tha t I' m "goin g t o ge t swarmed" upo n arrival . When I ask why, sh e says , "Because you'v e go t some thing tha t the y haven' t got ; i n fac t you'v e go t tw o o f them . . . . You ar e i n a male world." Whil e I would hav e assumed tha t the men woul d haras s a woman because the y woul d wan t t o kee p th e gu n rang e a "mal e world, " Elain e clari fies that they'l l wan t t o marr y me . S o few wome n shoo t tha t th e me n ar e anx ious t o mee t wome n wh o shar e thei r hobby . Ready fo r anything , I ge t t o th e "clubhouse, " a little shac k wit h no t muc h more tha n a coffee pot , a n ol d couch , a desk, an d a telephone. On e o f the olde r men give s me a warm greeting , "Welcom e t o th e club , Martha." Th e tra p mas ter, Jim, i s eve n friendlier an d I wouldn' t hav e know n th e greetin g t o b e odd , but Elain e say s that thi s shy, awkwar d ma n neve r talk s to anyone . Th e previou s day, Elain e taugh t " a feminist " ho w t o us e th e handgu n sh e ha d purchase d because a man wa s stalkin g her . Jim hi t o n her . H e give s m e hi s jacket t o wea r while shooting and then ha s to ge t something out o f the side pocket, the n want s me t o hol d hi s shotgun , an d finally offer s t o le t m e shoo t tra p wit h him . Ji m keeps trying to tak e over Elaine's instruction o f me, comin g up with severa l rea sons for me to use his shotgun instead of hers. Elaine rolls her eyes, trying to kee p him awa y from me , an d reassure s me tha t there' s a rule tha t h e can' t cal l me, h e doesn't inten d it , an d he' s harmless . I a m no t s o confiden t o f this imperceptiv e rifleman's harmlessness , however . Jim keep s finding strang e way s o f fitting int o my conversatio n wit h Elaine . Elaine tell s me tha t yesterday h e aske d her i f she'd cook fo r th e clu b o n Sunda y (whe n h e alread y knew this) , just t o b e aroun d he r female student . H e ask s agai n today , alon g wit h othe r od d questions . Elain e smiles a t me, rollin g her eye s reassuringly . W e shoo t th e shotgu n acros s a valley a t a rock formation . Th e ech o o f th e weapon i n th e wide-ope n spac e i s powerful, an d afte r shootin g thi s big thin g a couple o f time s I hav e a sense o f mastery . It' s no t a s heavy, a s uncontrollable , or a s difficult a s I ha d imagine d i t t o be . I learn t o loa d th e shotgu n an d d o s o before shootin g again . Afte r declinin g severa l offer s t o shoo t tra p wit h Jim , Elaine an d I return t o th e clubhous e fo r a cup o f coffee . I ask Elaine if she knows o f Women and Guns, a magazine i n circulation sinc e 1990. She says that she once subscribed, bu t didn' t lik e it, as she felt i t promote d a "false sens e of security" an d note d tha t ever y othe r page ha d a n advertisemen t for a purse tha t conceale d a handgun. (Althoug h conceale d handgun s ar e ille gal i n California , the y ar e lega l i n som e states. ) I t make s havin g a gu n see m glamorous, sh e notes , givin g a s an exampl e on e cove r wit h Lind a Hamilto n o n it. She' s beautiful, muscular , famous , an d thi s is not wha t wome n wh o us e gun s are generall y like .

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My secon d handgu n lesso n wa s no t a t a gu n clu b bu t rathe r i n a n unsuper vised outdoo r are a o n a mountai n ridg e wit h a backdro p o f wind-sculpte d sandstone rocks . Local s com e her e t o shoo t thei r guns . Target s ar e se t u p i n the distance , an d yo u shoo t towar d th e mountains . M y instructo r wa s Dale ( a pseudonym), a whit e ma n i n hi s thirtie s who , i n additio n t o teachin g thes e private lesson s i n "persona l defense, " i s a skilled martia l artis t an d work s a s a Model Muggin g instructor , bod y guard , an d surveillanc e operativ e fo r la w enforcement officials . Dal e charge d m e tw o hundre d dollar s fo r si x hour s o f instruction, whic h include d on e hundre d round s o f ammunitio n an d th e us e of his handguns . Dale an d I shoo t severa l o f hi s revolver s an d semi-automatic s a t stee l plat e targets. Dale ha s me shoo t standing , kneeling , an d eve n o n m y back , a s if I ha d fallen over , wit h th e gu n pointin g ou t fro m betwee n m y ope n knee s (a s in ill . 5). M y favorit e gu n wa s a semi-automati c tha t ha d a cli p holdin g ninetee n rounds. Dal e rearrange s th e stee l plat e target s whil e I' m no t looking , say s "OK," an d I turn aroun d an d have to spot and shoot each target. I have to shoo t down eac h targe t successfull y befor e movin g o n t o th e nex t one . Th e advan tage o f steel targets ove r pape r target s is that you kno w immediatel y whe n yo u have hi t i t because i t fall s ove r wit h a loud clankin g noise . Thi s kin d o f shoot ing with a semi-automatic i s a real rush. Fo r a second, i t occurs t o m e tha t I a m practicing som e sor t o f nightmaris h scen e i n whic h severa l peopl e ar e agains t me an d I have t o shoo t the m al l down . Dale provide s muc h practica l advic e fo r someon e wh o want s t o hav e a firearm fo r self-protection . Fo r instance , h e explain s tha t I shoul d kno w wh o my attorne y woul d be , preferably on e wh o defend s polic e officers , an d recom mends becoming friends wit h someone a t my local police station, because if one of the officer s know s wh o I am, th e tensio n an d suspicio n wil l be reduce d righ t away i f I cal l because I ca n as k fo r tha t office r an d h e o r sh e woul d trus t m e a bit more . An d whateve r I do , I shouldn' t sa y anythin g whe n th e polic e arriv e on th e scene o f a shooting. M y sens e of time an d o f the serie s of the event s wil l be wa y of f becaus e I'l l b e upset , shaken , i n shock . The y coul d us e wha t I sa y against m e later , s o I should just refus e t o sa y anything. Dal e als o tells me tha t a person ca n legally shoot a single, unarmed assailan t if he o r she is afraid he'l l ge t his o r he r gun . H e say s tha t deadl y forc e i s vali d i f there' s mor e tha n on e unarmed person , i f on e fear s fo r one' s life , althoug h becaus e I hav e Mode l Mugging multiple assailants training it's a "shady situation," an d I could get int o more troubl e tha n a "weak, " o r untrained , woman . Interestingly , peopl e i n Paxton Quigley' s firearm s safet y semina r (se e below ) assume d tha t bein g a trained woma n woul d mak e th e polic e mor e sympathetic .

Getting Mean | 7 3 The final hou r o f instruction take s place i n m y home . Dal e come s wit h m e to my apartment an d points out hiding places and other strategies of defense tha t I can use there. He notice s that I have a portable phone, and tells me that I could always ring the base unit with th e intercom butto n o n th e handse t t o distrac t a n intruder. H e als o show s me , usin g a fake knif e an d a fake gu n tha t shoot s plas tic pellets , whe n t o shoo t i f someon e charge s m e wit h a knife . H e show s m e how t o hol d m y gu n s o tha t someon e can' t com e fro m aroun d a corne r an d grab i t awa y fro m me . H e teache s m e ho w t o hol d someon e a t gu n poin t unti l the polic e arriv e an d demonstrate s man y trick s a n assailan t migh t us e t o hid e a gun o n hi s person, an d th e place s I might hid e on e i n m y home . Dale als o ha s a theory abou t wh y wome n ar e bette r shot s tha n men . Whil e Elaine tol d m e tha t i t wa s hormona l (wome n ar e calmer ) an d biologica l (women hav e wide r hips) , Dal e say s tha t it' s social—me n ar e to o restles s an d egotistical, while women ar e more patient . Meye r (1993 , 91) notes that he r firs t male instructor ha d a theory tha t th e femal e eg o is less connected t o explosion s and compare d women' s superio r concentratio n t o th e stead y focus require d fo r threading needles. Paxton Quigley' s friend Andre a Fran k says that women exce l at shooting because "w e see m to learn more rapidly , because we don' t hav e an y fixed ideas , an d w e don' t hav e a mach o attitud e o n ho w we'r e suppose d t o shoot, lik e me n do . Me n loo k a t co p show s an d Wester n movie s an d us e th e stars as role models " (quote d i n Quigle y 1989 , 22) . Paxton Quigle y travel s aroun d th e countr y offerin g women-onl y handgu n safety trainin g classes. Author o f Armed and Female and Not an Easy Target, Paxton Quigle y i s th e foremos t advocat e o f women' s handgu n trainin g an d i s known t o hav e th e bes t cours e fo r wome n i n firearms an d self-defense . A nationally recognize d persona l protection expert , Quigle y ha s made man y tele vision new s sho w appearance s an d i s a paid representativ e o f Smit h an d Wes son. I enrolled i n a class she offere d i n Sa n Francisc o a t a gun clu b tha t sponsore d her. Th e six-hou r clas s cost s $160 . Th e clas s paid a $15 rang e fe e an d $ 7 fo r a package of fifty bullets. Quigley i s a white woman wh o appear s to be in her for ties. He r petit e frame i s mor e tha n compensate d fo r b y he r powerfu l postur e and voice , whic h burs t wit h confidenc e an d authority . Of th e thirtee n o f u s i n th e class , mos t ar e white ; tw o ar e Latina ; an d on e is Easter n Europea n an d live d mainl y i n Canad a befor e recentl y movin g t o California. Th e younges t woma n ther e i s about twenty-eight , an d th e oldes t probably sixty . Half of the women arriv e with thei r ow n handguns . Th e othe r half wil l us e guns , alon g wit h ea r an d ey e protection , provide d b y Quigley .

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Of th e grou p wh o ow n handguns , onl y tw o hav e practice d shootin g the m before. Before th e clas s begins , everyon e talk s amon g themselve s abou t crime , drive-by shootings , an d th e increasin g danger s o f the worl d aroun d them . W e begin clas s with introductions , tellin g th e grou p wh y w e ar e here : "M y hus band die d an d I have al l his guns , an d I want t o lear n ho w t o us e them. " Say s another, " I a m divorced , happily , an d want t o learn how t o protect mysel f an d my daughter. " On e grou p o f women, thre e sister s an d thei r mother , ar e ther e with ne w gun s purchase d b y th e fathe r a s a Christmas gift . (Quigle y late r sug gests t o a few o f the m tha t the y g o trad e i n thei r gun s fo r differen t one s tha t fit thei r hand s better. ) N o on e mention s bein g threatene d b y anyon e specific . One participan t i s part o f a tea m o f documentarian s makin g a video o n gun s they pla n t o pitc h t o PBS . The cours e i s being filmed fo r thei r video . I ask th e videographer takin g th e clas s i f she'l l b e lookin g int o othe r form s o f self defense a s well. Sh e scoffs a t the suggestion , sayin g that umbrella s an d mac e d o not reall y cu t th e mustard ; ther e i s no "real " self-defense , sh e says , othe r tha n a gun . W e si t i n thre e row s facin g front , wher e Paxto n stand s wit h a small chalk board an d a table ful l o f self-protectio n item s lik e Peppe r Spray , a s well a s T shirts an d he r boo k t o sell . Before eve r eve n seein g gun s w e g o throug h a class session o n self-protection . Sh e first gives an introductory stor y o f how sh e use d to b e agains t gun s unti l he r goo d frien d wa s rape d a t hom e b y a man wh o ha d broken in . Th e polic e didn' t ge t ther e unti l wel l afte r th e ma n rape d he r an d left, eve n thoug h she' d calle d 9-1-1 a s he broke throug h th e window. Sh e con trasted thi s with a story o f a woman who' d hel d a burglar a t gun poin t unti l th e police arrived , which , interestingly , wa s i n muc h les s tim e sinc e sh e tol d th e police sh e ha d a gun. Paxto n emphasize s bot h th e fea r o f me n an d th e fea r o f guns turnin g int o a feeling o f control . Before learnin g anythin g abou t firearms, Paxto n lecture s o n awarenes s an d avoidance strategies . Sh e explain s "Th e Fiv e Ts " and distribute s a correspond ing hand-out : (1) Target. Usuall y attack s are not random , yo u ar e targeted: thi s may be for a minute o r a month . Wome n ar e vulnerable , considere d weaker—sh e i s careful neve r to say that women are weaker—it's assume d that we'll freez e up whe n attacked , o r tha t w e won' t hav e th e strengt h t o fight back . G o with any bad feelings you get, and don't risk trusting someone from who m you ge t ba d vibes , sh e says . She als o say s to b e les s predictable, lik e leav e your hous e an d retur n hom e a t different time s an d avoi d goin g t o th e ga s

Getting Mean | 7 5 station o n you r wa y hom e from work . "Don' t b e paranoid/ ' sh e said . "Make i t a game." Othe r advic e sh e give s include s th e following : I f yo u think you'r e bein g followe d whil e driving , mak e thre e righ t turn s an d then yo u kno w i f you're bein g followe d o r not . G o t o th e sam e ga s sta tion al l the tim e an d mak e friends wit h th e attendant s s o that i f you can' t make i t t o a police station , yo u ca n g o t o thes e guy s an d they'l l wan t t o help you . Also , if you're bein g stare d at , mar k th e perso n wit h you r eyes , let him kno w you'v e see n him s o he knows h e can' t surpris e you. Finally , don't as k fo r direction s i f you ge t lost . Hav e a portable cellula r phon e i n your ca r t o cal l and as k for directions . Tak e th e phon e i n a t nigh t s o tha t if a burglar take s th e first phon e of f the hoo k o r cut s th e lines , you'll stil l be able to call 9-1-1. Don't giv e out your social security number. O n you r checks, put onl y your first initial, don't giv e a phone numbe r (i f you hav e to, make one up, or give a business number), and use a P.O. Box or a business address. (2) Test. Men tes t wome n t o se e ho w they'l l react , b y following , staring , o r trying the old "arm on shoulder," which happen s most often i n the office . Paxton mainl y speak s o f th e mall , th e street , an d burglars . Sh e recom mends starin g bac k whil e thinking , "ge t awa y fro m m e " o r worse , i n your mind; o r say firmly, "You'r e walkin g too clos e to me!" If a man ask s you th e time , don' t stop . I n fact, don' t eve n answer . Cu t of f such behav ior immediately o r me n wil l thin k yo u lik e it and tak e i t t o th e nex t step . (3) Threaten. If you've bee n teste d successfull y a s a good victim , yo u ca n b e threatened verbally , physically , o r wit h a weapon . (4) Touch. The touc h i s the assault . Force d ora l se x is very commo n but , sh e explains rathe r nonchalantly , "yo u ca n bit e i t off. " (3) Take-off. This is where you sens e the criminal's feelings—he ma y feel ner vous, guilty , o r confused . Here' s wher e yo u ca n ge t murdere d o r receiv e other heavy-dut y violenc e i n additio n t o th e rape . You r readin g o f hi s behavior an d moo d i s crucial . W e the n ge t a lesson i n makin g th e hous e safe . Paxto n mention s tha t thi s is importan t becaus e "3 7 percen t o f al l rape s ar e i n a woman' s ow n bed room." Sh e doesn' t brea k thi s statisti c dow n b y acquaintanc e versu s strangers. W e ar e advise d t o ge t a solid-core doo r a s ou r bedroo m doo r an d to bol t i t wit h a medic o lock . Mak e a room , perhap s th e bedroom , int o a "safe room. " Hav e a rop e ladde r i f it' s o n th e secon d floo r (an d practic e going dow n it) . Next w e lear n some verbal self-defense. Paxto n interviewe d rapist s in priso n

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who tol d her that women's us e of harsh language, specificall y th e word "fuck, " might hav e deterre d them . S o we stand i n a circle aroun d Paxto n an d she has us practice tellin g he r t o " G E T TH E FUC K AWA Y FRO M ME! " Severa l o f us laug h

as we say it; one woman can' t eve n ge t herself to say "fuck." Paxto n goe s bac k to he r until sh e belts i t out . Then w e practic e shoutin g " N O ! " at her in the same way . She gets dow n o n th e groun d an d shows u s a couple o f kicks she learned i n Model Mugging , an d recommends tha t w e take a Model Muggin g course. She explains tha t sh e is a graduate o f two o f their courses , and that the y are invaluable fo r getting women t o practice bein g powerful, deliverin g blows , and yelling . Quigley lecture s on a range o f nonlethal weapons an d safety devices : The ten dollar mini-baton fo r key chains, which scare s men and reminds the woman car rying i t that sh e should b e alert an d ready fo r action; a remote ca r door opene r for you r ke y chain, whic h open s door s righ t befor e yo u get to your car , so you avoid fumbling ; peppe r spray—no w lega l i n California , althoug h yo u hav e t o navigate your way throug h th e bureaucracy fo r it, paying $17.95 a n d watching a videotape—which, i f used in a wide-open are a (neve r agains t th e wind) an d on the me n who are not immune t o it, make s assailant s choke , cough , clos e thei r eyes, and go down t o the ground in pain; twenty-dollar personal alarms, good for children and the elderly, which let off a very loud noise, as she demonstrated; and the Persuader an d stun guns , which sh e doesn't recommen d becaus e you cannot use them from a distance, and you must hol d them ont o th e attacker for three to four seconds . Befor e w e g o out to th e range, wome n bu y copies o f Quigley' s book Armed and Female, T-shirt s tha t say "Armed an d Female," and mini-batons to use as key rings. Also before goin g o n the range, we look ove r th e "Justifiable Us e of Lethal Force" handout . Paxto n doe s no t share an y opinion abou t women' s lega l self defense case s o r thei r history . Sh e simply explain s tha t i t i s legal t o us e lethal force whe n thre e element s ar e satisfied: (1) The ability element. Sh e says that polic e don' t usuall y as k women question s to tes t the "ability" elemen t o f the justifiable us e of lethal force . Th e ability elemen t i s that "th e attacker mus t hav e the power t o kill or cause crip pling injury , o r be advantage d wit h a disparit y o f force o r a disparit y o f skill." She explains that women don' t usuall y have the strength o r fighting skill, so the police presum e th e attacker had the advantage. (2) The opportunity element. Thi s i s tha t "th e attacke r mus t b e capabl e o f employing bodil y har m immediately . H e must be within range. " Paxto n notes ho w quickly a man can get to you, say from way across the room .

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Thus eve n across the room count s as "within range. " Paxton explain s tha t great bodil y har m include s rape . (j) The jeopardy element. "The perpetrato r mus t b e actin g i n suc h a manne r that a reasonabl y pruden t perso n woul d assum e h e intende d t o attack. " Of cours e on e canno t shoo t someon e who' s bigge r an d standin g acros s the roo m bu t doe s no t pos e a threat . Paxton i s carefu l t o remin d u s tha t w e ar e no t learnin g t o kill, but rathe r t o stop an attacker . Neve r tel l th e lega l establishmen t tha t yo u wer e traine d to , o r tried to , kill someone, sh e says ; alway s sa y you trie d t o stop someone. Sh e als o explained that , i n California , yo u ca n us e an y forc e t o sto p a n attacke r wh o enters your hom e an d tha t a woman usuall y gets off even i f she kills an unarme d attacker i n suc h a situation . But , sh e warns , yo u can' t shoo t someon e who' s retreating. Paxton mentione d a case of "domestic violence, " but it was an exam ple of the us e of mere threa t (somethin g known i n th e arme d self-defens e worl d as rarely successful) , wher e a woman showe d he r gu n from th e upstair s balcon y to, an d threatened , th e ex-love r wh o wa s stalkin g her . H e neve r agai n violate d his restraining order. ( I address the legal treatment o f battered women wh o shoo t their batterer s i n self-defens e i n chapter s 1 and 5. ) As w e ge t se t t o g o ou t o n th e range , thos e u s o f wh o nee d gun s ge t size d for th e appropriat e one . On e woma n ha d brough t i n a semi-automati c an d Quigley gav e he r a revolver t o use . Quigle y recommend s revolver s sinc e the y jam les s ofte n tha n semi-automatics , an d ar e easie r t o loa d an d unload . More over, yo u ca n se e th e bullet s an d they'r e easie r t o clean . Just a s my ol d fears o f getting struck dow n b y random fir e a t a bullet-infeste d quasi—Old-West dud e ranc h star t t o cree p u p o n me , Paxto n reassure s u s abou t how saf e th e rang e wil l b e fo r us . Sh e traine d u s for th e rang e exercise s s o tha t it would indee d b e safe . O n th e rang e w e g o ver y slowl y an d shoo t simultane ously a t he r command , standin g i n a line an d aimin g a t paper target s o f huma n silhouettes abou t seve n fee t away . Quigley's voic e sound s eve n mor e authoritativ e throug h he r bullhorn . Sh e commands u s t o loa d ou r guns , wal k i n fron t o f th e table s behin d whic h w e have bee n standin g i n a n orderl y fashio n wit h ou r gun s open , wal k u p t o th e shooting line , ge t i n read y positions , aim , lin e u p th e sights , pu t ou r finger s i n the trigge r guards , an d shoot . (Se e ill. 6.) Th e firs t tim e w e simpl y shoo t al l fiv e rounds an d the n stop . I have been s o amped burnin g powder tha t I don't kno w if I shot fou r round s o r five. After eac h shooting , we' d ope n th e cylinder s an d tur n the m upwar d t o empty ou r guns , wal k bac k t o th e tables , plac e th e gun s o n th e table , remov e

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our ea r protection, an d the n g o u p t o se e "th e damage " we've wreake d o n ou r targets. Paxton walk s over t o eac h of our target s to congratulat e us , giving a pat or a rub o n th e back . W e cla p fo r eac h woma n afte r assessin g her target . The n we pu t tap e ove r th e bulle t hole s o n ou r target s an d g o bac k an d d o anothe r exercise. Checkin g th e five ne w holes , ou r improvemen t i s noticeable . By th e end , w e hav e emptie d fifty round s int o th e pape r assailants , five a t a time, using different shootin g patterns—all five bullets at once, two t o the ches t and on e t o th e hea d (t o make sur e the attacke r i s "stopped"), o r al l five at onc e without takin g tim e t o lin e u p th e sights . I n on e exercis e w e fire whil e walk ing towar d ou r targets . Sometime s a student shout s obscenitie s whil e walkin g and shooting, explodin g as much ange r as gunpowder a t her imaginary attacker . We al l shoo t well . Al l bu t fou r o f m y fifty bullet s hi t somewher e o n paper man's head , neck , o r chest . Afterward, Paxto n autograph s ou r pape r target s an d say s good-bye . Som e pay te n dollar s fo r a certificate wit h whic h t o bu y a gun. (A s of April 30 , 1994 , California require s evidenc e o f a n exa m o r clas s t o purchas e a gun. ) W e al l receive littl e gol d revolve r pin s provide d b y Smit h an d Wesson . Paxto n men tions a t thi s tim e tha t she' s a feminist an d tha t wome n hav e t o lear n t o protec t themselves wit h guns . She states the importanc e o f women's learnin g from an d with othe r women , remindin g u s tha t i n th e mid-1980 s sh e ha d t o lear n firearms i n a n intimidatin g all-mal e environment . Recallin g m y experienc e with Jim a t th e othe r gu n club , I admittedl y fee l relieve d t o b e i n a women only environment .

Martial Arts Courses A studen t a t th e doj o perform s a kat a ( a prearrange d se t o f movement s against an imaginary opponent ) fo r th e sensei (Japanes e for instructor). Sh e has a serious and frightening loo k on her face, a fierceness in her eyes. He r arms slice throug h th e air , creating , punc h afte r punch , a n audibl e wind . The first martia l art s self-defens e cours e I too k wa s a mixed-gender cours e i n Krav Maga, th e Israel i martial art . Before signin g up, I called th e instructo r an d asked i f thi s class , advertise d a s "self-defense, " wa s appropriat e fo r wome n wanting t o lear n ho w t o defen d themselve s fro m sexua l assault . H e answere d that i t most definitel y was . For thirty-fiv e dollars , I met wit h abou t fort y other s (twenty wome n an d twent y men ) tw o hour s pe r wee k fo r te n weeks . We me t in a room use d for aerobic s and danc e classe s on a college campus . The instruc -

Getting Mean | 7 9 tor, a clean-cut whit e North America n abou t twent y years old and standing five feet an d five inches tall, wore hi s white cotto n martial arts uniform, o r "gi," tied with a black belt. W e wor e sweat s and short s an d stoo d i n paralle l row s o f fou r facing th e teacher , wh o stoo d o n a slightly elevate d bloc k wit h a mirrored wal l behind him . After a brie f warm-u p an d stretch , w e practic e routin e movement s a t hi s command. H e shout s ou t a numbe r an d w e d o th e correspondin g elbo w jab. There ar e seve n elbo w jab positions . Student s tak e turn s holdin g u p pad s fo r each othe r t o kic k an d punch. Th e me n i n m y practic e grou p expres s astonish ment whe n I kic k th e pa d the y ar e holdin g muc h harde r tha n the y expecte d from a woman. B y now I have learned t o kic k hard , bu t the y don' t kno w that . They se e a woman an d ar e surprise d tha t I , a s the y pu t it , "jus t walke d u p t o the pa d s o gracefull y an d the n naile d it. " We practic e stand-u p fighting exclusively . W e lear n ho w t o punc h quickly , to scratc h th e attacker' s fac e a s we tak e hi m down , yellin g "KIAI! " a s we jab, and t o "finis h hi m off " whil e he' s o n th e groun d an d w e ar e stil l standin g o r kneeling ove r him . W e lear n t o bea t kidneys , gra b th e assailant' s jacket o r ski n at the sides of the back while deliverin g a knee t o th e groin . W e partne r of f an d practice getting out o f strangle holds and rear grabs. The instructo r turns out th e lights and we practic e gettin g ou t o f various strangl e hold s an d grab s with part ners i n th e dark . I look fo r a female partner , bu t th e wome n ar e al l paired u p with othe r me n o r th e friend s wit h who m the y ar e takin g th e class . Grapplin g with a strange ma n i n th e dar k i s unnerving. Th e lin e betwee n practic e assault s and rea l one s fade s wit h th e flourescen t lights . Ou r techniques , however , ar e not intentionall y practice d i n a high-adrenaline situation . On e ma n approache s me with arm s stretched out, putting me i n a choke hold, without directiv e fro m the teache r t o d o so . These dynamic s adde d u p t o a n ofte n condescendin g o r embarrassin g atmosphere. Fo r instance , th e me n wit h who m I practice d kickin g le t m e know tha t the y didn' t thin k I coul d d o it ; an d th e instructo r calle d m e u p t o the fron t o f th e clas s t o demonstrat e th e techniqu e o f blockin g hi s strikes , despite th e fac t tha t i t wa s m y firs t da y i n Kra v Mag a an d I ha d just learne d the blockin g techniqu e five minute s prior . Other s (Searle s an d Follansbe e 1984, 65) have mad e simila r observation s formally . Becaus e wome n ofte n find it difficul t t o mov e beyon d traditiona l gendere d expectation s an d t o exer t themselves physicall y whe n me n ar e presen t withou t becomin g embarrasse d (or, a s i n m y case , tease d an d pu t o n display) , a co-e d cours e wit h mal e instructors ca n prove mor e difficul t fo r wome n (ibid. , 65-66) . Som e mal e stu dents eithe r find i t difficul t t o pla y th e defeate d rol e i n self-defens e script s

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with wome n (ibid. , 66) o r fin d i t al l to o eas y an d enjoyabl e t o pla y th e assailant role . Krav Mag a di d no t encourag e a student's sens e o f self-worth o r confidenc e in rightin g ability ; i t assume d tha t w e di d no t nee d t o b e taugh t whe n t o fight and that it's O K t o fight, onl y how t o fight. Thi s is quite typica l of courses me n usually offe r t o men . I n thi s sense , th e cours e wa s reall y geare d towar d thos e who alread y fel t entitle d t o respec t an d wh o alread y believe d tha t the y coul d fight, tha t is , men . Fo r m y instructo r simpl y treate d u s a s though w e di d no t have a fear o f fighting, a fear o f getting hurt , a lack o f entitlement, o r a lack o f self-esteem. Although Kra v Maga's technique s ar e designed s o that anyone , regardles s o f size, can stop a n assailant as quickly a s possible, the clas s received n o instructio n on ho w t o en d a fight—something tha t i s particularl y dangerou s fo r wome n whose attacker s could be intent o n retaliatio n o r continuing the fight i f they ar e not knocke d ou t col d (ibid. , 66) . Our instructo r simpl y showed u s the move — for instance , gettin g the assailant' s head i n ou r lef t han d an d deliverin g punche s to th e fac e wit h ou r righ t hand—concludin g hi s demonstration wit h th e direc tion, "an d finish hi m off. " W e wer e neve r tol d wha t w e wer e suppose d t o d o after gettin g ou r assailan t int o a submissive position . Wha t di d "finis h hi m off ' mean? Run ? Wai t fo r help ? Ti e hi m u p an d the n ru n fo r help ? Kil l him ? We di d no t hea r anythin g abou t th e law , callin g th e police , o r gettin g t o a safe place. Nor wer e w e tol d what t o sa y to th e polic e t o explai n ou r behavior . There wa s n o emotiona l tal k o r discussio n o f prior assaul t experience s i n Kra v Maga, a s there wa s i n Mode l Muggin g and , I would late r learn , i n th e martia l arts self-defens e course s fo r women . W e receive d n o informatio n o n preven tion, a s Paxton Quigle y gav e in her firearms course . The instructo r di d not dea l with an y o f the fear s o r stereotype s peopl e ten d t o hav e abou t assault , no r di d he dea l wit h th e differen t situation s an d way s i n whic h wome n an d me n ten d to ge t attacked . I left wonderin g wha t a women-only martia l art s course woul d be like . I visite d Valle y Women' s Martia l Arts , Inc. , i n Easthampton , Massachusetts , a private nonprofit schoo l of self-defense an d karate. Dojo owne r an d master sen sei Janet Aalf s ha s been involve d wit h th e martia l art s for twent y years . (Se e ill. 7.) Sh e was a student o f Wendy Dragonfire , th e founder o f the school, who wa s a student o f Master Rober t A . Trias, founder o f the Unite d State s Karate Asso ciation. Blac k belt s Bet h Hol t an d Janet Aalf s too k ove r th e schoo l i n 198 2 when Dragonfir e wen t t o the West Coast . Sinc e Holt's departur e in 1992 , Aalfs has run Valley Women's herself . She has also served as president o f the Nationa l

Getting Mean | 8 1 Women's Martia l Art s Federatio n (NWMAF ) fo r severa l years. Thi s i s know n as a first-rate school . As you ente r th e dojo , ther e i s a large offic e t o on e sid e an d a table an d bul letin boar d t o th e other , filled wit h information , clippings , an d th e dojo' s ow n newsletter, The Shuri Spiral News. Formerl y a factory, thi s dojo i s large and ope n with a hardwood floor, almos t lik e an artist' s loft. Th e wall s are decorate d wit h posters, painting s o f th e woma n symbol , an d creativ e wor k abou t women . A section o f one wal l is devoted t o newspape r clipping s an d photograph s o f Val ley Women student s an d teacher s pose d i n stron g defensiv e stances . Aalfs, black bel t i n Shuri-ryu , a n Okinawa n styl e o f karate, is a tall and lea n white woma n o f thirty-seven. He r advance d clas s that I observed i s comprise d of seve n whit e wome n i n thei r lat e twenties . The y ar e strikingl y vita l an d wide-eyed. Th e wome n ar e wearin g simpl e swea t pant s an d T-shirts . Th e advanced karat e clas s i s ver y self-defense-oriented , but , unlik e th e one-da y self-defense classe s tha t martia l artist s offer , involve s th e traditiona l ritual s o f the martia l arts . Before enterin g th e dojo , student s remov e thei r shoe s an d the n bow , whic h symbolizes respec t fo r th e learnin g place . Th e wome n for m a circle t o begi n a meditation an d warm-up . Janet sense i says , "Sashita, " an d th e student s kneel . They com e t o attentio n a t the word Kiotsuke, an d begin thei r meditatio n whe n they hea r Seiza mokuso. The atmospher e i s intimate, an d I feel lik e a n intruder . But the n sense i Aalfs introduces m e an d explain s that I' m observin g the clas s for the researc h I' m doing . Th e first thirt y minute s ar e ver y lo w energy . Student s warm u p wit h slo w movements , feelin g thei r body' s energ y an d controllin g every movemen t (a s in ill . 8) . In thi s two-hou r class , sense i Aalf s introduce s "th e Fiv e Anima l Frolics" — the crane , th e tiger , th e bear , th e deer , an d th e monkey . Th e anima l frolic s ar e images tha t th e wome n ca n cal l upo n whe n the y wan t t o defen d themselves . The cran e i s a ver y slo w an d controlle d movement . Th e tige r movemen t i s fierce. Student s kic k wit h cran e energ y an d the n kic k wit h tige r energy . The y practice fron t sna p kicks , roundhous e kicks , an d combination s o f kicks . The n they pair up an d practice self-defense scenarios . One attack s in an unpredictabl e fashion an d th e othe r respond s a s one o f the animals . The cran e self-defens e styl e is calm, subdued . Th e tige r self-defens e i s fierce and frighteningl y loud . Th e voice s o f thes e wome n ar e astonishing : "GE T O U T O F M Y FACE! " on e growls . Th e student s playin g assailant s see m ver y calm, no t worrie d tha t the y ar e goin g t o ge t kicked . Th e defenders ' hand s an d feet brus h righ t b y thei r opponents ' bodies , neve r makin g contact . Thes e women ar e admirabl y strong . An d the y ar e obviousl y havin g fu n doin g this .

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While th e clas s start s ou t calm , i t graduall y build s an d b y th e en d th e wome n are sweatin g an d tired . Ther e i s n o high-adrenalin e stat e o r majo r heart-rat e increase. The monke y respons e i s sprighdy an d take s the opponen t b y surprise . Janet invite s m y participatio n b y askin g m e t o gues s whic h o f the five animal s a particula r studen t i s using . Aalf s seem s lik e a wonderfu l teache r an d rol e model, smilin g an d encouraging—fa r from th e stereotypica l ster n martia l artis t pushing a t o r humiliatin g students . Indeed, oppose d t o th e ide a tha t informatio n shoul d be disseminate d fro m above, Aalf s ha s the student s circl e u p agai n afte r thei r wor k an d discus s ho w it went . On e comment s tha t sh e didn' t lik e ho w everyon e tende d t o laug h when the y di d th e self-defens e scenarios , particularl y whe n the y di d th e monkey. Anothe r remarks , skeptically , tha t sh e think s th e animal s hel p he r get ou t o f herself , s o it' s lik e th e tige r o r th e monke y defendin g he r rathe r than sh e wh o defend s herself . Janet suggest s tha t th e student s ar e no t leavin g their bodie s b y becomin g th e animals ; instead , sh e explains , th e animal s become them . Even i n thi s advance d class , which emphasize s th e artisti c an d philosophica l aspects o f th e martia l arts , Aalfs stresse s ho w t o us e technique s i n actua l attac k situations. She als o teaches a women's self-defens e course , a t a sliding-scale fee , which combine s variou s karat e styles , assertiveness training , an d a discussion o f violence agains t women . Aalf s believe s tha t wome n ca n bes t avoi d har m b y strengthening themselve s physically , mentally , an d spiritually . He r self-defens e course use s role-playin g t o teac h wome n ho w t o ge t ou t o f various situations , showing women ho w t o break free whe n grabbed , whe n backe d agains t a wall, and whe n pinne d o n th e ground . Aalf s als o teache s wome n verba l defens e an d inspires thei r menta l attitude , insistin g tha t th e wa y yo u presen t yoursel f influ ences whether o r no t someon e wil l bother you . Sh e wants wome n t o ge t ove r a patter n o f thinkin g sh e call s "traine d helplessness, " whic h render s the m unnecessarily defenseless . Aalfs teache s self-defens e t o senio r citizens , showing , fo r instance , ho w t o use a can e fo r self-defense . Par t o f a whole networ k o f organizationa l service s for women, Valle y Women's Martia l Arts also offers self-defens e classe s throug h battered women' s shelter s an d universit y women' s centers . I observe d a fairl y advance d women' s martia l art s cours e a t Karat e Women i n West Lo s Angeles . Karat e Women maste r sense i an d co-owne r o f th e doj o Maria Does t lead s th e class . A robus t an d cheerfu l forty-somethin g woma n o f Asian, European , an d Nativ e America n descent , Does t ha s a blac k bel t i n Okinawan karate , and ha s been runnin g Karat e W o m en fo r ove r twent y years .

Getting Mean | 8 3 Karate W o m en ha s a reputation amon g martia l artist s a s an excellen t plac e fo r women t o lear n karate . Activ e i n th e Pacifi c Associatio n o f W o m en Martia l Artists (PAWMA) , Karat e W o m en sponsore d th e 199 4 annua l PAWM A camp. The atmospher e her e i s a bit differen t from tha t o f the doj o i n Easthampton . This doj o i s fairly small , nex t t o th e lou d an d bus y Venic e Boulevard . It s tin y entranceway ha s a bathroom area , a little noo k wit h a desk an d telephone , an d a bench wit h flyers announcin g clas s schedules, th e upcomin g PAWM A camp , and a student's party . Th e doj o itsel f is on e bi g matte d square , wit h a shelf all around th e periphery o f the roo m displayin g impressive trophies . A few poster s with Japanese lettering adorn th e walls, along with a display of martial arts fighting sticks , swords , an d knives . Women remov e thei r shoes , bow , an d ente r th e dojo . The y circl e u p an d bow towar d th e cente r o f th e circle . Eigh t whit e wome n an d fou r wome n o f color, betwee n th e age s of nineteen an d forty-five , practic e self-defens e move s for th e upcomin g PAWM A camp . A fifteen-year-old bo y practice s weapon s techniques with a visiting male sense i over in on e corne r o f the room. Al l wea r gis with varyin g colo r belts, showing th e varyin g skil l levels o f the participants . Sensei Does t doe s no t explai n m y presenc e t o th e students . The y see m unaf fected b y an d unintereste d i n m y observation . The clas s is loosely structured , a s women i n group s o f two o r thre e practic e getting ou t o f differen t hold s an d throwin g thei r opponent s t o th e ground . They yel l a lou d an d dee p "KIAI! " a s the y delive r th e final (pseudo ) blow — either a kick o r a punch t o th e fac e o f the opponen t o n th e ground. Som e prac tice with a n assailan t carryin g a fake knife . A woman take s her opponen t dow n by th e throat , knowin g tha t i n a real fight she' d gra b an d pul l o n tha t delicat e skin aroun d th e front o f the assailant' s neck . The moo d i s remarkably spirite d an d chatty . Lik e th e wome n doin g karat e in Easthampton , the y loo k strikingl y stron g an d vibrant . O n e woma n knock s her assailan t t o th e ground , an d realize s sh e doesn' t remembe r th e final mov e in thi s scenario . Stil l i n position , sh e an d he r downe d opponen t consul t th e pair nex t t o them . Th e downe d woma n let s ou t a lou d kis s towar d th e ground. The n th e standin g woman kisse s her finger an d bring s i t dow n t o th e cheek o f he r opponent , followin g instantl y wit h th e final move— a standin g kick straigh t dow n t o th e hea d o n whic h she' d jus t place d a kiss . "KIAI! " They mov e easil y i n an d ou t o f laughte r an d ferocity . Anothe r grou p o f women practicin g mentio n th e movi e Buffy the Vampire Slayer, specificall y a scene i n whic h Buff y throw s a ma n t o th e ground . " I love d that, " on e pro claims.

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Sensei Does t goe s aroun d watchin g th e wome n practic e an d givin g the m suggestions. Sh e periodicall y explain s t o me , seate d a t th e bench , what' s going on . Afte r a n hou r o r s o the y begi n t o practic e thei r katas , walkin g i n a lin e wit h fist s jutting out . Student s bo w t o thei r instructo r repeating , "ye s sensei" a s they hea r suggestion s fo r improvin g technique . Finally , fro m thei r positions i n a single line , student s presen t thei r move s t o sense i Doest , eac h one takin g a turn a t bein g bot h victi m an d assailan t wit h th e nex t perso n i n line. I remarke d tha t th e atmospher e wa s mor e emotionall y heav y i n Mode l Mugging, an d Does t explained , "that' s 'caus e yo u go t me n cursin g a t yo u there!" Sh e think s wome n ge t use d t o suc h verba l abus e an d les s angr y a t it . (Model Mugging' s philosoph y i s tha t wome n lear n t o ge t angr y a t verba l abuse, an d t o fight throug h it. ) Mari a teU s m e tha t th e beginner s lear n basi c techniques, for instance ho w t o ge t ou t o f choke hold s and grabs from behind , what sh e take s t o b e th e mos t commo n way s me n assaul t women . Th e mor e advanced student s lear n take-down s (takin g th e opponen t t o th e ground) . Whereas beginnin g leve l Mode l Muggin g course s teac h wome n t o kic k fro m the ground , martia l art s course s trai n wome n t o kic k whil e standin g up . (Se e ill. 9.) Does t teache s wome n t o g o fo r a n attacker' s groi n wit h th e edg e o f th e hand, o r wit h a slap-and-grab, s o tha t i f the ma n ha s hi s knee s together , yo u can still induce sever e pain an d "ge t tha t spas m going." I f he's wearing a groin protector cup , sh e explained , the n that' s eve n better , "yo u just gra b th e cu p and scrap e i t forwar d an d you'v e go t cup-o-noodles. " Doest als o teache s self-defens e t o blin d women , showin g the m ho w t o us e their cane s i n self-defense , an d t o dea f women, wh o lear n defense s agains t rea r grabs, th e sor t t o whic h dea f women ar e particularl y vulnerable . ( A coupl e o f the student s kno w sig n languag e an d serv e a s interpreters.) Sh e show s wome n in wheelchairs ho w t o d o chok e hol d releases , which the y ca n perform b y tak ing advantag e o f the weigh t o f their bodies ' bein g i n th e chairs , pulling down ward t o releas e th e choke . Sh e teache s the m nos e an d throa t strikes , an d sug gests that they continue such strikes until the threat of the assailant is totally alleviated, eve n i f this mean s usin g lethal force . I asked if she taught th e othe r women letha l techniques an d sh e said yes, th e strike t o th e throa t an d th e hee l pal m t o th e nos e ar e bot h potentiall y letha l moves. Sh e said that he r self-defens e classe s work fo r wome n wh o ar e not big ger o r stronge r tha n men . I aske d he r i f siz e o r strengt h wa s reall y th e issue , pointing ou t tha t tin y me n ca n becom e exper t fighters throug h martia l art s training. Sh e responded : "Fo r men , it' s al l ego ; the y hav e t o ge t cu t dow n i n class. Fo r women , it' s al l self-esteem ; the y hav e t o b e buil t u p i n class. " Sh e

Getting Mean | 8 5 explained tha t a little boy will tell you h e ca n kill someone whe n aske d what h e would d o i f assaulted, whil e a girl will reply , " I don' t know. " Finally, I participate d i n a three-and-a-half-hour , forty-dolla r worksho p a t Karate Women, taugh t by dojo co-owne r Debora h McCormic k an d an instruc tor-in-training. Onl y tw o othe r students were signe d up fo r th e class . Everyone was white . W e wer e no t aske d t o bo w upo n enterin g th e dojo . W e simpl y removed ou r shoes , walked in , an d sa t in a circle o n th e mat . The clas s begin s wit h a n hour-lon g informa l lecture . W e ar e give n th e frightening statistic s o n rape . Fift y percen t o f rapist s ar e dates , the y say , an d the overwhelmin g majorit y o f rapist s ar e acquaintances . Rap e i s abou t "vio lence, no t sex, " the y explain . "H e want s powe r ove r you ; h e want s contro l over you. " Thi s i s ironically followe d b y th e statemen t tha t mos t me n d o no t know eithe r wha t rap e i s o r tha t the y hav e rape d whe n the y have . McCormick say s tha t rap e i s mos t o f th e tim e planned , an d then , perhap s catching hersel f in th e logica l contradictio n o f the statements , correct s tha t t o say tha t sex i s planned. W e hea r th e "Fiv e Ts " a s we di d i n Paxto n Quigley' s class. The instructor s critiqu e femininit y an d commen t o n mal e socialization : Women ar e mor e polit e an d considerat e wherea s me n ten d t o thin k onl y o f themselves. Fo r instance , on e instructo r explains , "wome n wal k int o a roo m and wonder , 'i s someon e sittin g i n thi s chair? ' an d 'a m I i n anyone' s way? ' whereas me n just g o plop." Self-defense , a s they se e it, involve s women' s con sciously retrainin g thei r though t processe s s o tha t w e reac t differentl y i n a n assault: Instea d o f feeling, "Huh ! Omigod ! Wha t a m I goin g t o do ? I' m help less!" w e migh t begi n t o fee l th e wa y me n ten d t o feel : "Wha t a m I goin g t o do t o ge t ou t o f thi s situation ? Wha t ar e m y options? " And , just a s Dal e an d Paxton suggeste d ho w w e migh t accoun t fo r ou r violen t acts , thes e instructor s explain that , i f we eve r fight t o defen d ourselves , w e shoul d sa y that w e feare d for ou r life , tha t w e feare d th e ma n woul d kil l us . After th e lecture we practic e yelling " N O !" acros s the roo m t o on e another . Next, w e d o a verbal assertivenes s dril l by sittin g in a circle an d tellin g the per son nex t t o u s t o tak e he r han d of f o f ou r knee , withou t smiling . T w o o f u s manage t o d o thi s without smiling . On e crack s a smile an d giggles , mentionin g that i t feel s s o natura l t o smile , eve n i n thi s situation . We lear n ho w t o stom p o n th e inste p o f an attacker' s foot , ho w t o delive r a heel palm strike to th e face (a s in ill. 10 ) and scrape down th e face wit h ou r nail s (to "ge t evidence—skin , blood , an d DNA") , an d ho w t o ge t ou t o f fron t an d rear grabs , al l th e whil e yellin g " N O ! " a s fiercely a s possible. Bein g i n suc h a

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small group , i n a fairl y low-energ y situation , make s yellin g " N O ! " awkwar d and mos t o f the tim e w e sa y it quietl y o r forge t t o sa y it altogether . W e lear n a side kick fro m th e ground , ho w t o knoc k someon e dow n wh o i s dragging yo u by the feet, an d how t o thro w of f with your hip s someone wh o i s sitting on to p of you. W e di d no t practic e an y self-defens e move s i n a high-adrenaline state , and everythin g wa s rathe r carefu l an d controlled , excep t fo r th e strike s t o th e groin o f a stuffed pai r o f jeans whic h th e instructo r hel d behin d us . W e als o lear n a letha l techniqu e calle d th e tige r claw , a quic k strik e o f knuckles t o th e throa t tha t collapse s th e windpipe . Th e instructor s not e tha t they teac h thi s letha l techniqu e i n cas e w e ar e i n a situation i n whic h w e fee l we hav e t o kil l someone . Besides , the y explain , eve n i f a student want s neve r to us e a lethal technique , the y teac h i t because the y believ e wome n fee l differ ent knowin g tha t the y coul d kil l someone . "Me n thin k the y coul d kil l some one, an d 'know ' the y coul d kil l a woman, " McCormic k explains , "wherea s women don' t thin k the y ca n hur t anybody. " McCormick wa s right . W e practice d th e tige r cla w mor e tha n an y othe r move, fascinated wit h it. We practice d the form o f the strike over and over, int o the ai r an d als o just barel y touchin g eac h other' s necks . Fo r th e res t o f the da y I though t abou t ho w I ha d learne d t o kil l someon e wit h m y bar e hands . I n Model Muggin g I ha d fel t fierce. I n firearms course s I ha d certainl y fel t letha l when I was firing th e gun . I n al l the classe s I had fel t powerfu l an d strong . Bu t nothing fel t quit e lik e knowing tha t m y bod y i s capable o f lethal force. I t felt a s if I had bee n le t i n o n a well-kept secret .

Self-Defense-Oriented Fitness Michael Schwartz , th e develope r an d instructo r o f Cardi o Combat , a t Crunc h aerobics studio in Manhattan's Greenwic h Village , is a lean an d muscular whit e man, probabl y aroun d thirty . Beamin g wit h energy , h e enter s th e aerobic s room, wher e student s stan d alread y i n place , facin g hi m a t front. Th e student s are mainl y youn g wome n i n aerobic s outfits , abou t thirt y i n all , paying severa l dollars fo r th e hour-lon g clas s (eleve n dollar s fo r walk-ins , a little les s for peo ple who hol d regula r passes). A fe w me n ar e staggered acros s the bac k ro w an d look a bi t awkwar d a s th e clas s begin s t o mov e t o th e ragin g techn o beat . Instead o f jazz danc e step s (a s in traditiona l aerobics ) o r patterne d movement s over a step (a s in ste p aerobics) , Michae l lead s th e clas s in a series o f heel-pal m strikes and punches t o th e air , left an d right , lef t an d right , an d a series of moc k knees-to-the-groin an d front sna p kicks , left an d right , lef t an d right .

Getting Mean | 8 7 There i s no work wit h partner s (fo r instance, gettin g ou t of holds), no r are there an y kicks from th e ground (althoug h suc h kick s woul d hav e mad e grea t leg abductions) . Ther e i s n o discussio n abou t sexua l violence , n o bondin g among th e women, n o practice i n lifelik e scenarios . Everyon e just goe s i n for the workou t an d leaves. Still , though , twent y minute s int o th e class , yo u are absolutely intoxicate d wit h endorphin s amon g you r comrade s i n sweat . Thi s combative stanc e start s to feel fun, exhilaratin g in fact. Give n tha t I had already learned t o fight seriousl y i n othe r course s befor e I came here , I could imagin e that regula r attendanc e i n Cardio Comba t woul d b e a rather enjoyabl e for m o f exercise an d would remin d m e of what I had learned i n a more intense , seriou s instructional setting . Several othe r course s tha t combin e cardiovascula r fitness , music , an d self defense move s ar e availabl e i n aerobic s studio s o r sport s an d fitness centers , including Aerobo x (i n N ew York City ) an d Boxing fo r Fitnes s (i n Souther n California). Thes e course s ar e offere d a s part o f a variety o f clas s option s fo r women an d men who hol d membership s a t a particular studi o o r sport s cen ter. Whil e wome n mak e u p the majority o f aerobics instructors , I did not see a singl e femal e instructo r i n thes e self-defense-oriente d fitness classes . O f the many ne w aerobic workout s o n videotape now , Steve DeMasco' s Aerobic SelfDefense Workout (1992 ) wa s sold o n th e cabl e televisio n sho w Home Shopping Network. Interestingly , thi s video is a rather boring, slo w aerobic workout. Th e only plac e a woman ha s in it is leading th e aerobic workou t an d demonstrat ing th e kick s an d strike s whil e Stev e explain s everything . Sh e doesn' t eve n speak.

Conclusion Whatever it s problems an d contradictions, th e experience o f self-defense train ing transforme d me . Even th e way I walk changed . I realized thi s when, walk ing alon e a t night, me n were visibl y awar e o f my footstep s behin d them . N o w my footstep s mak e the m tur n aroun d nervousl y t o see who's behin d them . M y personal experienc e ca n ope n a windo w int o th e worl d o f women' s self defense, bu t the experiences an d reflections o f instructors an d students in a variety o f self-defense course s wil l enabl e u s to thematiz e an d analyze th e proces s of learning t o fight back . What doe s i t mean whe n wome n i n self-defense classe s confron t thei r fear s and prepar e t o fight back ? Usin g interview s an d informa l conversation s wit h

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women i n self-defens e classes , as well a s the discussion s tha t self-defenser s hav e with on e anothe r i n thei r newsletters an d magazines, the nex t chapte r describe s what som e o f the women wh o hav e taken on e o r another o f these forms o f selfdefense hav e t o sa y abou t it . W h o ar e th e assailant s wome n ar e learnin g t o defend themselve s against ? H ow i s rape accomplished, an d what mus t a woman do t o challeng e a rapist ? Thes e ar e th e question s tha t self-defenser s negotiate , and tha t th e nex t chapte r analyzes . I dra w ou t th e critiques , implici t an d explicit, o f gendere d understanding s o f aggressio n offere d i n self-defens e instruction an d sho w ho w self-defens e metamorphose s th e femal e body . I delineate th e processe s b y whic h wome n substitut e a physicall y competent , aggressive postur e fo r a passiv e one , describ e ho w student s an d instructor s o f self-defense understan d tha t process, and suggest how tha t process could disrup t the ideologica l structur e tha t rationalize s men' s violenc e agains t women .

3 The Fightin g Spiri t Self-Defense As Counterdiscourse

As th e las t chapte r showed , wome n lear n t o shoo t an d figh t i n a highly charged sensoria l atmosphere o f supportive women , sweat , bullets, swea r words, an d fantasize d an d enacte d fighting success . Thi s ofte n pleasurabl e process engage s wome n mentally , emotionally , an d physically . That' s ho w i t effectively encourage s a new bodil y comportment . B y requirin g wome n t o ac t in unfeminine ways , self-defense instructio n make s possible the identification o f not onl y som e o f the mechanism s tha t creat e an d sustai n gende r inequalit y bu t also a means t o subver t them . Self-defens e i s a counterdiscourse : I t represent s woman, man , an d aggressio n i n ne w way s tha t oppos e thos e w e tak e fo r granted. Women' s ne w bodil y comportmen t affect s no t onl y thei r confidenc e with respec t t o thwartin g assaults ; it proves highly consequentia l fo r man y area s of their lives . Gender i s a lived ideology— a syste m o f ideas abou t me n an d wome n wit h which w e live our lives. As lived ideology, thos e ideas get transformed int o spe cific bodil y practices . Socially produced se x differences ar e embodie d an d live d out a s "real. " The y ar e materialize d a s habit an d take n fo r grante d a s "secon d nature" (Bourdie u 1990 ; Butler 1990) . Despite thei r implici t misrecognitio n a s natural facts , thes e commonsens e understanding s o f gende r ar e rehearse d ove r and over ; the y ar e no t natura l an d therefor e no t a s stable a s they ma y see m an d often feel . A s a collectio n o f dispositions , gende r i s knowledg e embodie d through rigorou s education . Bodily assumptio n o f th e normativ e behaviora l rule s i s crucia l t o th e per petuation o f th e powe r system , fo r a s MacKinno n (1987 , 118 ) argues , femi ninity i s define d i n term s o f a rap e culture ; an d therefor e femininit y mean s physical weaknes s an d violability . I t i s no t jus t tha t wome n an d me n ar e stereotyped o r ar e playing ou t gende r roles : "Mask s becom e persona s becom e people, socially , especiall y whe n the y ar e enforced . . . . I t i s no t just a n illu sion o r a fantas y o r a mistake . I t become s embodied because i t i s enforced " (ibid., 119) . 89

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As Butle r (1990 ) suggests , compulsor y heterosexualit y i s th e institutiona l context i n whic h thi s embodimen t take s place . Th e politica l syste m structure s our desires , a s wel l a s ou r masculin e an d feminin e bodil y dispositions . Th e dominant discours e produce s bodie s whos e appearanc e an d desire s i t ca n accept—bodies tha t ar e intelligible withi n th e normativ e scheme . Cultura l val ues ar e materialize d a t th e leve l o f th e body . Compulsor y heterosexualit y an d male dominatio n ar e cultura l value s turne d int o naturalized , embodie d under standings—as sur e a s chewing wit h ou r mouth s close d an d sayin g "please " an d "thank you " are . Socia l sanction s ar e inscribe d withi n ou r bodie s an d fee l lik e second nature . I n thi s way , ou r gendere d bodie s ar e materialization s o f powe r and, specifically , o f compulsory heterosexualit y an d mal e domination . Because gende r i s no t reall y natural , i t require s constan t enforcemen t an d repetition. Thi s repetitio n i s abruptl y interrupte d i n women' s self-defens e classes. Wha t feminist s tal k abou t interrupting—femininity—self-defenser s practice interrupting : The y enac t th e deconstructio n o f femininity . I n th e process, self-defens e enable s wome n t o internaliz e a differen t kin d o f bodil y knowledge. A s such, self-defens e i s feminism i n th e flesh.

Unlearning Femininity The ful l meanin g o f women's self-defens e begin s wit h wome n wh o ar e afrai d of violence an d o f their inabilit y t o preven t it . Women ente r gyms , dojos , an d gun club s hopin g t o lear n som e strategie s an d trick s wit h whic h t o defen d themselves. The first and most significant hurdl e turn s out t o be thei r ow n fem ininity. The y ar e afrai d the y wil l hur t someone , an d the y ar e fearfu l o f gettin g hurt. Man y ar e reluctan t t o touc h a gun, a s though i t wil l explod e o n contact . In padde d attacke r an d martia l art s courses , rooki e student s ofte n smil e a t thei r attackers an d apologiz e afte r landin g kicks—whic h the y hav e ye t t o delive r a t full force . It becomes clea r that women' s inabilit y t o fight i s a cultural matte r o f sexual politics, no t a natura l matte r o f hormones , brawn , o r life-affirmin g biologica l programming. Th e feminin e demeano r tha t come s s o "naturally " t o women , a collection o f specifi c habit s tha t otherwis e ma y no t see m problematic , i s pre cisely wha t make s u s terribl e fighters. Suddenl y w e se e ho w thes e habit s tha t make u s vulnerable an d tha t aestheticiz e tha t vulnerability ar e encourage d i n u s by a sexist culture . Th e ver y thing s tha t mar k u s as successful feminin e wome n make u s easy victims. We d o no t consciousl y appl y rule s o f social life; w e sim ply liv e the m a s second nature . I n fact , s o ingrained ar e the y tha t wome n hav e

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to practic e an d practic e befor e the y ca n yell "GE T AWA Y F R O M M E " without smiling. Thes e habit s are not role s women ar e playing. The y ar e embodied . These habit s ar e no t random , bu t ar e expression s o f a gendere d order , an d beyond this , a gendered orde r i n whic h wome n lose . Contemporary Wester n women , unlik e thei r mal e counterparts , gro w u p with a sense tha t thei r bodie s ar e no t theirs , tha t thei r bodie s ca n b e appropri ated. Thi s i s particularly s o fo r wome n wh o hav e alread y experience d abus e a s children. Child-sexual-abus e survivor s i n th e self-defens e classe s I too k some times had t o overcom e a tendency t o carr y themselve s i n a particularly helples s manner. (A s I suggeste d i n chapte r 1 , thi s passivit y whic h man y clai m "leads " to rap e i s itsel f a resul t o f rape. ) Som e self-defens e instructor s hav e thi s sam e analysis. For instance: "It's every child's birthright t o body sovereignty. I n boys, we overemphasiz e it ; i n girls , w e 'no, ' beat , incest , an d rap e i t ou t o f them " (Helen Grieco , padde d attacke r cours e instructor) . Other s not e that , regardles s of persona l history , wome n lear n tha t the y ar e capabl e o f nothin g othe r tha n submission t o assault . I n " N R A Woman' s Voice, " a featur e i n th e American Rifleman, Elizabet h J . Swase y (1993 , 18 ) provide s a relate d argumen t abou t socialization: From birth , mos t wome n ar e brainwashed int o thinkin g th e onl y proper , response t o physica l aggressio n i s submission. O n th e playground , we'r e told "girl s don't hit"—eve n i f we're strikin g back i n self-defens e t o flee a much large r an d stronge r schoo l bully . Later , we'r e tol d wome n shoul d "submit t o crimina l attac k fo r fea r o f injury"—as i f the crim e itsel f wer e not injury . That' s wh y fo r mos t women , th e decisio n t o lear n t o defen d oneself is life-altering. I t goes against what we'v e bee n taugh t from birth . In chapte r 1 , I suggeste d tha t womanhoo d an d aggressio n ar e no t comple mentary. Womanhood , a s it i s socially defined , i s precisely wha t wome n mus t overcome whe n learnin g t o fight. I asked instructors , wh o ha d observe d mor e students than I , to tell me the biggest hurdle that women mus t overcome . Thei r answers reflecte d th e wa y femininit y remain s a n obstacl e t o competen t physi cal aggression . The y reporte d tha t thei r student s neede d t o overcom e a fear o f guns an d a fear o f hurting people , a proclivity t o b e nice , a physical hesitancy , and a disbelief in thei r physica l power : Women aren' t suppose d t o fight an d aren' t suppose d t o hi t bac k an d they're suppose d t o b e nic e an d sweet , an d no t sa y no , an d no t d o any thing t o tic k peopl e off . An d t o ge t women t o g o throug h tha t an d actu ally fight an d strik e afte r year s an d year s o f being brough t up , you know , where you'r e no t suppose d to , gettin g the m throug h tha t " I don' t wan t

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to fight" o r "I'm no t supposed t o fight" [i s the biggest barrier that wome n have t o ge t over] . An d onc e that' s broke n dow n the n everythin g els e i s pretty muc h eas y sailing . (Mal e instructor , padde d attacke r course ) They don' t wan t t o hur t anyone . (Karat e instructor ) Overcoming th e attitud e tha t firearms ar e exceedingl y dangerou s an d inherently evi l an d ugl y an d macho . Ther e ar e lot s o f negative connota tions tha t peopl e hav e abou t firearms. (Ly n Bates, gu n instructor ) The fea r o f the gun . (Paxto n Quigley , gu n instructor ) How societ y portray s women . I thin k I woul d sa y mos t wome n hav e been raise d to believ e the y ar e not capabl e no t onl y o f physically defend ing ourselves, but o f a lot o f things, an d I think tha t i s the mos t challeng ing. It's really digging through al l of the mental attitude that' s been devel oped an d pu t ther e fo r man y wome n sinc e th e tim e the y wer e born . . . . It's probabl y th e mos t difficul t thin g t o ge t acros s i n clas s tha t the y ar e strong . . . an d i n mos t case s the y wil l b e abl e t o defen d themselves . (Padded attacke r cours e instructor ) They rarel y accep t th e fac t tha t wha t you'r e dealin g wit h i s people yo u know, an d no t s o much thos e like , "Wel l wha t i f both hand s ar e tie d u p and I' m i n th e woods an d nobod y els e is there an d thi s person ha s a knif e at my throat? " I' m like , "OK , well , ho w di d you ge t there? " you know ? . . . Without puttin g i t like, "Yo u di d somethin g t o caus e thi s person t o attack you, " becaus e nobod y ask s t o b e attacked . Bu t jus t goin g back wards fro m tha t biggest , hugest , scaries t thin g an d saying , "No , it' s thos e little things that happen ever y day , an d thos e things tha t happened t o yo u as a kid an d thos e message s tha t you ge t tha t you're no t wort h defendin g that allo w tha t kin d o f thing t o happen . . . . S o it's a lot o f education an d it's educatio n tha t i n fac t steer s u s directly towar d situation s wher e we'r e going t o ge t mashed . (Jane t Aalfs, karat e instructor ) Young (1990 , 146-47 ) suggest s tha t wome n ten d t o d o thing s "lik e girls " because w e bot h lac k confidenc e i n ou r physica l abilitie s an d fea r gettin g hurt . This is because we experienc e ou r bodies as fragile encumbrance s rathe r tha n as tools wit h whic h t o ge t somethin g done . Th e followin g self-defens e studen t I interviewed sai d she entered instructio n ver y angr y a t experiences o f continue d street harassment , an d she contraste d thi s to th e demeanor s o f the othe r wome n in he r class , remarking tha t i t i s possible an d commo n t o speak "like a girl": What I saw in th e wome n wh o wer e takin g th e clas s was really frighten ing to m e becaus e I felt, I mean, I came int o th e clas s because o f this sex ual harassment. . . . I was so pissed tha t I was ready t o scream , I was read y

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to yell , t o punc h thing s an d I don' t kno w wha t go t som e o f thes e othe r women int o th e clas s but the y wer e s o mee k an d s o unabl e t o eve n just yell " N O" i n a way that wasn't like , when w e di d this exercise where w e just wen t u p t o eac h othe r t o sa y " N O , D O N ' T TAL K T O M E LIK E T H A T , " . . . the y couldn' t eve n d o tha t withou t smilin g o r lookin g down o r something . . . . I had n o troubl e just wailin g o n them , an d tha t was just whe n i t kind o f hit me , tha t wow , thi s is really a bigger proble m for eve n othe r people tha n i t is for me , saying " n o" and not soundin g lik e a girl. (Rap e crisi s center self-defens e cours e student ) A differen t studen t tol d m e tha t sh e felt uneas y learnin g ho w t o hur t someone : They taugh t u s a lo t o f stuf f tha t the y practic e with , "Now , yo u don' t think you'l l b e abl e t o d o this , bu t believ e m e yo u can. " An d tha t wa s kind o f scary learning ho w t o goug e people' s eye s ou t o r brea k bone s o r whatever. I remembe r feelin g kin d o f like, o h I don' t kno w i f I ca n d o that kin d o f thing. It' s just no t m y philosoph y o f life. (Rap e crisi s cente r self-defense cours e student ) Another simpl y stigmatize d combativ e sport s a s to o masculine , whic h intimi dated her : At first I thought boxer s were disgusting , bloody, yuck y men . Bu t the n I realized tha t yo u wea r padde d gea r an d everyon e wh o enter s th e rin g wants t o b e there . Also , it' s goo d t o b e abl e t o tak e a punch. W e thin k we'll be overwhelmed , bu t we ca n handle it. (Padde d attacke r cours e an d boxing student ) Another studen t admitte d tha t initiall y sh e wa s embarrasse d t o ac t physicall y powerful: I remember havin g a lot of embarrassment abou t m y physical power. Th e coach demand s an d brings it out o f you. I n th e gy m it's encouraged t o b e as powerful a s you ca n be. You're workin g t o ge t mor e an d mor e powe r physically. An d there' s als o a menta l powe r an d emotiona l powe r tha t you develop . Yo u ma y hav e fou r round s t o g o an d yo u can' t just brea k down an d leav e th e ring . It' s realizin g wha t yo u hav e an d becomin g les s and les s embarrasse d abou t it , an d it' s permitte d an d it' s desired . (Boxe r and boxin g instructor ) Women lear n tha t girl s are the objects , no t th e agents , of aggression throug h fears an d experience s o f abus e a s well a s throug h routin e childhoo d socializa tion. Girl s hav e Barbie , a fashion plate , an d boy s hav e G. L Joe, a fighter. Girl s have "dolls" and boys have "actio n figures." Anothe r way women lear n that th e

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world o f actio n an d darin g i s no t ope n t o the m i s throug h popula r movies . Some instructor s pointe d ou t tha t wome n routinel y appea r physicall y incom petent i n films: It's lik e yo u se e thes e movie s wher e thes e wome n ar e beatin g o n som e guy's chest and it's like, " Oh le t me go, " and o f course it doesn't d o any thing becaus e wha t doe s beatin g o n someone' s ches t do ? Bu t I' m like , you know , i n tha t sam e littl e scene , you coul d imagin e instea d o f all thi s energy—bomp bom p bom p bom p bomp—on e littl e poke t o th e ey e an d he's out , yo u know ? (Jane t Aalfs , karat e instructor ) N o wonde r wome n canno t imagin e tha t the y migh t overpowe r a man . Another instructo r linke d he r students ' fear s o f losing a fight t o th e image s o f women i n ou r culture : Through televisio n an d film an d movie s an d books , an d stuf f lik e that , we're alway s show n th e woma n trie s t o hur t th e gu y an d h e just laugh s at her . O r h e take s th e gu n fro m her . An d s o ou r powe r i s take n awa y every nigh t o n television , becaus e there' s a t leas t thre e show s tha t sho w a woma n raped , murdered , o r hur t i n som e way . A t leas t thre e show s a night, so we ar e constantly seeing women bein g bombarded wit h al l these horrible thing s tha t happe n s o w e alway s imagine , "wha t woul d I d o i f this happened? I don't know. " Becaus e we'r e alway s scared o f getting i n those situation s bu t w e neve r se e them gettin g ou t o f them, s o we neve r picture ourselve s gettin g ou t o f them. Me n ar e always shown ho w t o ge t out o f situations everyday , from th e tim e they'r e little boys until th e tim e they're grow n men . Ever y movi e ou t ther e i s like Rambo takin g on fifty guys, Chuc k Norris—yo u know , al l thes e guys . . . . W e hav e a lo t o f heroes, w e hav e n o sheroes. (Karat e instructor ) Feminine hesitanc y an d perception s o f women's incompetenc e ar e part an d parcel of rape culture because they help men wi n verbal and physical fights wit h women. Eve n thos e who insis t on men' s incomparabl e braw n canno t den y tha t women's sight , hearing, hands, and reflexes ar e every bit as competent a s men's. Differences i n siz e an d strengt h becom e irrelevan t t o tw o peopl e wh o ar e armed. Thi s i s what make s th e femal e fea r o f firearms s o ironic, an d revealing . One nee d no t b e bi g o r stron g t o shoo t a gun . An d ye t man y wome n ar e a s doubtful o f thei r abilit y t o handl e an d us e a firearm effectivel y a s the y ar e o f their ability to kick an d hit potently. Women hav e learned a discomfort aroun d power tha t coul d exer t forc e ove r anothe r person . Thi s educatio n i s clearly no t a result o f the putativ e fac t o f women's physica l weakness . Th e ver y eas e wit h which wome n tak e t o firearms render s th e man y association s betwee n mas -

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culinity an d gun s al l the mor e suspect . Wome n ar e afrai d t o fight fo r th e sam e reasons the y ar e afrai d o f guns—i n eithe r case , women' s siz e o r strengt h i s fa r less relevan t tha n th e socia l investmen t i n a femal e bod y tha t doe s no t exer t coercive force . The theoretica l mode l o f lived , embodie d powe r inequalitie s i s no t totall y determinative, however. Women's self-defens e i s a reprogramming regime n fo r the body . Here , women—regardles s o f thei r consciou s politica l belief s abou t gender—rehearse a new scrip t fo r bodil y comportment . Th e body , then , i s no t simply th e locu s o f patriarcha l power , ideology , o r brutality ; i t i s a potentia l locus o f resistance . I n self-defens e classes , wome n mak e thei r aggression , an d the femininit y tha t prevent s it , conscious . The y develo p a ne w self-image , a new understandin g o f wha t a femal e bod y ca n do , an d thu s brea k ou t o f th e expectations unde r whic h the y hav e acte d an d tha t hav e cemente d themselve s at the level of the body. I n thi s way, a feminine habitu s i s supplanted b y a fight ing habitus .

The Lore of Self-Defense What i s th e lor e o f women's emergin g physica l empowerment ? Wha t ar e th e stories an d image s use d t o construc t frame s fo r women' s aggressio n agains t men's? Wha t ar e th e mean s b y whic h self-defens e instructor s hel p wome n dis card thei r feminin e selve s an d tak e o n a ne w assertiveness ? I n wha t follows , I suggest that, to turn women int o fighters, women' s self-defens e course s provid e stories tha t mak e fighting OK , provid e a n emotionall y supportiv e atmosphere , suggest a ne w relationshi p t o th e media , an d enlis t th e mind , emotions , an d body i n combination . Originally I had bee n skeptica l o f self-defense instructio n tha t di d no t stres s the fac t tha t th e overwhelmin g majorit y o f women ar e victimize d b y acquain tances, dates , boyfriends , husbands , an d othe r famil y members . I sa w severa l self-defense course s de-emphasize , a t leas t initially , th e fac t tha t a woman wil l most likel y us e thes e technique s o n a ma n sh e know s an d mayb e eve n loves . But ever y instructo r I questioned abou t thi s said the sam e thing : That a woma n should b e taugh t t o defen d hersel f against anyon e wh o threaten s harm , regard less o f he r relationshi p t o him . Furthermore , i t seeme d quit e clea r tha t the y knew th e statistics . On e instructo r tol d me , "I'v e trie d t o demystif y th e whol e stranger-danger thing . That' s no t th e person—they'r e alread y prepare d fo r tha t danger. S o th e rea l assailan t i s th e trusted , perhap s loved , partne r o r acquain tance o r relation—relative " (rap e crisi s cente r self-defens e cours e instructor) .

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One instructo r reveale d th e strateg y o f allowing women t o imagin e the y wer e fighting a stranger: "W e star t off dealing with th e strange r because it' s a lot eas ier psychologically. It' s harde r t o thin k abou t defendin g yoursel f against some one yo u car e fo r o r trust . Bu t th e pattern s o f attac k ar e simila r i n strange r an d acquaintance rape " (Chimer a instructor) . It became clea r that instructors tr y anythin g tha t the y thin k wil l work t o ge t women t o lear n som e fighting skills . I n othe r words , politica l o r theoretica l consistency i s no t thei r first priority . The y attemp t t o appea l t o habit s tha t already sound sensible to most women. Fo r example, one instructor frames self defense a s a bod y projec t muc h lik e eatin g healthfull y an d othe r mean s b y which peopl e preven t deat h an d disease , while anothe r liken s it t o prope r aut o maintenance: We wan t t o enabl e wome n t o b e self-possesse d an d mature . W e buckl e our sea t belts, we ge t ou r breasts examined, w e tr y to ea t healthy, bu t th e tragedy is women aren' t prepared [tha t way] for violence. The mor e edu cation yo u hav e th e mor e choice s wome n have . (Hele n Grieco , padde d attacker cours e instructor ) A woma n unawar e o f th e danger s ou t ther e i s just th e sam e a s drivin g with ba d brake s o r n o moto r oil . (Athen a Lee , gu n instructor , quote d i n Hodges 1993 , 6C) In he r self-defens e video , Lisa Sliwa's Common Sense Defense (1985) , Sliw a speaks to women wh o sh e thinks might be concerned with remainin g feminine , as she demonstrate s ho w t o thwar t a potential threa t b y pressin g a finger int o the noo k a t the bas e o f the throat : "An d remember , we'r e talkin g abou t doin g things tha t don' t eve n requir e yo u t o brea k a fingernail." Instructor s tr y what ever i t take s t o ge t wome n t o valu e themselves . Revealingly , though , wome n are sometime s mor e motivate d t o car e fo r thei r ow n safet y whe n doin g s o wil l help someon e else . As one instructo r said : W e tal k a lot abou t ou r importanc e an d takin g care of ourselves, an d tha t nobody i s going t o tak e car e o f us. Als o i f she i s hurt tha t i s also impact ing other s who car e abou t her , an d tha t ofte n click s in fo r them , becaus e women hav e bee n raise d t o b e th e caretakers . Tha t make s the m angr y i n a differen t way . (Chimer a instructor ) Instructors tr y to frame women' s aggressivenes s in ways that they think will resonate wit h th e wome n i n thei r classes . The way s i n whic h th e wome n tal k abou t themselve s revea l a numbe r o f cultural assumption s abou t womanhoo d an d violenc e tha t th e instructor s tr y t o

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address a s they attemp t t o refram e women' s aggressio n a s appropriate. Whil e a larger discours e abou t "nature " instill s in wome n a sense o f inevitable helpless ness, natur e storie s ar e employe d b y instructor s t o justify women' s us e o f forc e in self-defense . Fo r example , on e instructo r tol d u s to thin k o f ourselves a s th e mother anima l protectin g he r cubs . A studen t i n thi s clas s tol d u s tha t sh e thought o f her fighting sel f as "Oso"—the Spanis h wor d fo r bear , i n th e mas culine—protecting th e cubs . B y th e en d o f th e course , sh e ha d change d th e word t o the feminine, Osa, which fo r he r marked a n important transitio n i n he r self-perception. Thoug h sh e still envisioned fighting t o save her cubs , she coul d now imagin e fighting a s a female . A woma n I interviewe d echoe d thi s dis course, bu t extende d th e righ t o f protection t o herself : Just bein g m y anima l sel f an d goin g like , "FUC K Y O U ! " Yo u know , "GET T H E HEL L O U T O F HERE! " Lik e a mother doe s t o a n infant , it's lik e nobod y ca n touc h m y child , an d the y tal k abou t thi s anima l where yo u don' t thin k twice . Yo u wouldn' t negotiat e wit h somebod y who's goin g t o har m you r chil d s o th e sam e woul d g o fo r you . (Padde d attacker cours e student ) Women's aversio n t o seein g thei r defensiv e violenc e a s legitimate, notabl y when their own bodily boundarie s migh t b e encroached , i s combated b y refer ring to th e protectio n o f others. Therapeuti c discours e help s some wome n wh o want t o discus s themselve s a s fierce. Occasionall y a self-defenser speak s no t o f protecting hersel f but o f protecting he r "chil d within. " Th e therapeuti c trop e of the "chil d within," a n innocent bein g whom th e adul t must protect , o r wh o never deserve d th e ba d thing s t o happe n an d tha t stil l feel s th e pai n o f abuse , might wor k fo r som e wome n b y providing the m wit h a mythic innocen t chil d to protect . Wome n mus t eithe r imagin e tha t the y ar e defendin g someon e els e or redefin e themselve s a s worth defending . Other wome n frame thei r self-defens e a s a right o f citizenship. Th e follow ing student explaine d he r sens e o f entitlement t o ow n a gun an d us e i t fo r self defense i f necessary i n term s o f other decision s sh e feel s wome n hav e th e righ t to mak e abou t thei r bodies : My stron g feelin g i s the righ t o f people t o decid e . . . a proven, capabl e citizen shoul d b e allowe d t o choose , whethe r it's , yo u know , you r birth—I mea n I feel ver y strongl y you'r e i n charg e o f your ow n body — whether you wan t children , whethe r you wan t t o die , whether you wan t to hav e a gun . I mea n thi s i s a personal decision , al l thos e things , an d I don't believ e anybod y ha s th e righ t t o dictat e tha t t o yo u a s long a s yo u are a good citize n an d mentall y capable . (Gu n student )

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An instructo r pu t i t simply : "There' s nothin g morall y objectionabl e abou t defending myself . I' m a goo d citize n fo r doin g so " (Hele n Grieco , padde d attacker cours e instructor) . Coming t o valu e onesel f i s a major par t o f unlearnin g femininity , whic h i s in par t define d b y th e absenc e o f a n authoritativ e sens e o f th e legitimac y o f one's ow n need s an d desires . Fo r thi s reason , Mode l Muggin g passe s aroun d a ten-point list , "Ever y Woman' s Bil l o f Rights," 1 whic h reads : (i) Th e righ t t o be treate d with respect ; (2 ) The righ t t o have and expres s your ow n feelings ; (3 ) The righ t t o b e listene d t o an d take n seriously ; (4 ) The righ t t o se t you r ow n priorities ; (5 ) Th e righ t t o sa y " n o " withou t feeling guilty; (6 ) The righ t to as k for what you want ; (7 ) The righ t to ge t what yo u pa y for ; (8 ) Th e righ t t o as k fo r informatio n from profession als; (9 ) Th e righ t t o mak e mistakes ; an d (10 ) Th e righ t t o choos e no t t o assert myself . Instructors d o no t merel y teac h wome n t o fight. The y teac h wome n tha t the y are important , tha t the y ar e wort h fighting for . A s on e self-defense r wrot e i n her dojo' s newsletter : "It' s rarel y simpl y a kick t o th e kne e tha t w e teach , bu t rather th e world-shiftin g insigh t o f th e powe r t o hur t rathe r tha n b e hurt , th e R I G H T N O T T O B E H U R T " (The Shuri-Spiral News, Februar y 1993 , 6). Indeed, instructor s se e i t a s a centra l tas k t o resocializ e wome n t o b e mor e confident. T o thi s end , th e instructor s provid e a n importan t rol e model . Janet Aalfs, th e karat e instructor , mentione d tha t sh e modele d strengt h fo r he r stu dents. On e rap e crisi s center self-defens e cours e studen t explaine d tha t he r rol e models include d he r loud-talkin g grandmother , he r instructor , "physicall y assertive people, " an d th e wome n i n movie s "wher e they'r e reall y tough. " A s much a s women' s sens e o f feminin e comportmen t i s generate d b y medi a images, wome n see k model s o f self-defens e i n imagisti c discourse . Tha t sam e student elaborated : "Lind a Hamilto n i n Terminator 2; I loved tha t movie . I just loved the scenes of her, an d at the end , he r with he r gun s and her muscley arm s and stuff ; I just thin k she' s totall y cool. " Women's inabilit y t o imagin e themselve s fighting bac k effectivel y i s in par t media-generated. Thi s becomes obviou s in self-defense classes . For example , i n a self-defense cours e o n arme d assailants , women ar e provided wit h a display o f weapons (screwdrivers , knives , swords , clubs , etc.) , whic h th e wome n under stood i n term s o f films i n whic h a man murdere d a woman wit h th e weapon : "This i s th e Jaso n [fro m th e movi e Halloween] knife—[plungin g th e knif e downward whil e mimickin g the film's soun d effects ] eee , eee , eee, eee. " Non e of u s though t o f movie s i n whic h on e o f th e weapon s wa s use d b y a femal e

The Fighting Spirit | 9 9 character. A t th e sam e class , a s student s learne d t o disar m an d knoc k ou t assailants wh o hel d knive s t o thei r throats , on e woma n note d tha t sh e ha d no t realized tha t thi s wa s a possibl e assaul t situatio n (i.e. , on e i n whic h th e firs t attacking mov e i s a knif e a t th e throat ) becaus e sh e ha d no t see n a woma n attacked thi s particular wa y i n an y movies . Self-defensers us e images o f women i n variou s way s t o understan d th e rela tionship betwee n wome n an d aggression—henc e th e significanc e o f the emer gent aggressive woman i n visual media. Many self-defenser s see m to have a new appreciation fo r image s o f femal e toughnes s an d tak e pleasur e i n watchin g female movi e character s wh o ar e allowe d t o hav e an d us e weapons , disabl e attackers, and exer t control . Self-defenser s tal k about th e latest movies in whic h a woma n fights. No t al l wome n wholeheartedl y embrac e th e ne w image s o f women, however . Som e distanc e themselve s a bit fro m th e hyp e surroundin g women's engagemen t wit h violence . On e studen t spok e o f Thelma and Louise this way : " I just enjoye d th e movie ; I thought i t wa s kin d o f a fun adventure " (gun student) . Anothe r woma n tol d m e tha t sh e woul d prefe r t o se e image s i n which men an d women ar e cooperating equals. Having read a lot of science fiction, sh e laments tha t th e mai n character s ar e usuall y me n and , whe n ther e ar e women, "They'r e Amazons , which doesn' t appea l to me because they are exag gerated an d it' s no t a balance. It' s to o opposite , o r th e othe r en d o f the pendu lum" (padde d attacke r cours e an d boxin g student) . The followin g instructo r doe s no t oppos e th e violen t adversaria l natur e o f certain films, but doe s wish ther e were scene s of women's legitimat e self-defen sive violence : I ha d a problem wit h Thelma and Louise. I t wa s a very stron g movi e an d I think th e reaso n why me n ca n com e back o n u s is because the ma n did n't lung e a t her , sh e just wen t of f and sho t th e guy . I f he ha d s o much a s just steppe d an d reache d fo r he r an d the n sh e sho t him , the n th e whol e of what happene d woul d hav e fit i n a better contex t fo r women . (Karat e instructor) In tha t film, Louise' s sho t a t Harlo n i s not fired i n self-defense . Althoug h som e moviegoers ma y hav e enjoye d identifyin g wit h a violen t ac t tha t wa s a t leas t ambiguous i f not downrigh t suspect , thi s instructo r i s clearly investe d i n hero izing women's legitimat e us e o f violence i n th e appropriat e circumstances . One studen t I spok e wit h sai d sh e doe s no t appreciat e an y image s o f vio lence: I don' t lik e th e violenc e period , whethe r it' s me n o r women . I t i s kin d of a novelty and it's interesting to see women kickin g the shit out o f other

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people an d wha t I appreciat e abou t i t i s ofte n i n th e movi e th e wome n are usin g violenc e fo r som e reason . Yo u ca n tel l tha t they'v e buil t i t u p inside them , al l this bullshit ha s been lai d on them . A lot o f it is sexist an d a lo t o f i t i s just reall y bullshi t an d the y finally explod e int o violenc e a s opposed t o violenc e bein g thei r first solution t o ever y problem , whic h i s often wha t a lot of other violent images are in movies. . . . But I' m alway s the perso n wh o feel s ba d fo r th e ba d gu y wh o get s sho t i n th e movie , even thoug h I' m goin g "yeah , kic k hi s ass!" But I' m als o going , "Ouch , that kin d o f hurt, " o r "Wha t abou t hi s wife? " (Rap e crisi s cente r self defense cours e student ) Self-defensers als o discusse d films i n whic h a woman di d no t ge t ou t o f a n attack. Self-defens e trainin g make s wome n mor e critica l o f th e typica l repre sentations o f women , a s a gu n studen t explained : "M y loo k a t th e entertain ment ha s changed a little bit. I feel super-strong. I feel like I have a lot of knowledge, an d i t feel s reall y good . S o we'l l g o t o th e movie s an d I'l l b e reall y ma d when the y portra y a woma n a s helpless " (gu n student) . On e instructo r sug gested tha t w e rewrit e th e scrip t i n whic h a woman doe s no t fight back , a s w e were suppose d t o d o whe n w e dream t tha t we di d no t wi n a fight: "W e alway s tell wome n whe n they'r e watchin g a movi e t o retel l th e stor y t o hav e th e woman defen d herself . Or a lot of women hav e dreams while they're takin g th e class and we tel l them t o retell the story when the y wake up " (Chimer a instruc tor). I n beginnin g t o thin k t o themselve s ho w th e femal e characte r i n a scen e might hav e prevaile d ove r a n attacker , a s well a s in decidin g abou t wha t sort s of image s the y prefe r t o see , wome n for m a mor e investe d an d critica l rela tionship t o dominan t image s o f femininity . Just a s images o f women wh o d o no t fight affec t ou r perceive d abilitie s an d bodily comportments , s o d o image s o f wome n wh o fight. On e instructo r noticed tha t Thelma and Louise motivated wome n t o lear n t o us e firearms: " I think Thelma and Louise was probabl y a turnin g poin t i n women' s conscious nesses in the Unite d States . There wer e a lot of women wh o too k m y clas s afte r Thelma and Louise and said that they took th e clas s because the y saw this movie" (Paxton Quigley , gu n instructor) . Despit e th e fac t tha t Thelma and Louise was not a film about women's self-defens e an d contained n o scene of justifiable vio lence, image s o f women' s violence , whateve r thei r cinemati c context , migh t help wome n experienc e an d deplo y thei r bodie s alon g th e line s o f differentl y fantasized self-definitions . I f wome n alread y fee l vulnerabl e t o me n precisel y because they do not se e images of women prevailin g over men, an d in fact rou tinely se e th e opposite , image s o f wome n fighting ca n produc e a ne w body consciousness complementar y t o women' s self-defens e training .

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In additio n t o encouragin g women' s critica l engagemen t wit h popula r images of the female body , instructors attempt t o undo women's belief that the y cannot fight b y sharin g storie s o f women' s successfu l fights. Sharin g women' s stories of triumph an d survival are central to self-defense culture , an d importan t for student s becaus e succes s storie s ar e rarel y reporte d i n th e media , thu s per petuating women' s lac k o f confidence. Instructor s explained : We don' t hea r those kind o f stories in the newspapers, an d if we di d we' d have a whol e differen t vie w o f what' s possible , s o w e hav e t o suppor t each other . An d that' s lik e th e mai n purpos e o f the workshop s tha t I d o besides, yo u know , givin g som e . . . practical informatio n abou t "Wha t would you d o if this happened o r that happened?" But a lot is about hear ing eac h other' s storie s an d knowin g tha t whethe r w e hav e forma l edu cation o r not , i n term s o f self-defense , tha t w e hav e a lot o f wit . (Jane t Aalfs, karat e instructor ) [Women's succes s storie s are ] th e bi g roo t o f wha t w e teach , becaus e those aren' t shared . W e rea d abou t th e violen t attacks , no t th e fou r ou t of five wome n wh o successfull y ge t away . Wome n nee d t o hav e a n example. (Chimer a instructor ) These succes s storie s hel p instil l a sens e o f confidenc e an d a broader , les s androcentric perspectiv e o f wha t count s a s self-defense . Fo r instance , self defense i s no t necessaril y a formulai c se t o f tighd y controlle d moves , fo r instance a coo l Clin t Eastwoo d "mak e m y day " sho t o r a Bruc e Le e karat e chop, kick , an d spin . I t i s a se t o f strategie s employe d tha t migh t begi n wit h tricking o r distractin g a n attacker , includ e onl y verba l self-defens e an d the n running away , involv e flailin g an d goin g ballistic , o r ma y eve n include , i n a gang attack fo r example , a strategic decisio n t o submi t t o th e first ma n i n orde r to creat e a n opportunit y t o escape . Sharin g women's succes s stories helps rede fine wha t count s a s fighting, an d thu s enable s women t o discar d th e self-defeat ing conceptua l framewor k tha t define s fighting a s those thing s me n ten d t o d o better tha n women . A s on e instructo r pu t it , "A n ey e i s an ey e an d a throat i s a throat an d we've al l got 'em " (Hele n Grieco , padde d attacke r cours e instruc tor). Anothe r instructo r explained , We don' t wan t t o hav e a brawl bu t fo r th e woma n t o ge t ou t o f the sit uation a s fas t a s possible , an d tha t don' t hav e t o d o wit h th e woman' s strength o r th e man' s strengt h bu t wit h th e anatom y o f the body. . . . For instance, a man's kneecap . There' s no t a lot o f muscle ther e an d i t break s easily. I f a woma n ca n lif t he r le g t o wal k u p a stair , sh e ca n brea k hi s knee. Sam e wit h th e eye s o r throat . It' s ver y eas y t o g o int o thos e areas .

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Striking an y o f those areas , it's goin g t o disabl e hi m becaus e h e can' t se e or breath e o r ru n an d tha t give s a woma n a chanc e t o ge t t o safety . (Chimera instructor ) Sharing succes s stories reminds wome n tha t ther e ar e many way s t o fight a n attacker an d tha t wome n hav e th e wit , will , an d strengt h wit h whic h t o d o it . Hence wome n ofte n shar e wit h th e clas s their ow n triumph s tha t occu r whil e taking thei r self-defens e course . Durin g th e mont h I wa s takin g a padde d attacker course , I yelled fiercely a t a man o n th e stree t who wa s sexually harassing me . Neve r befor e ha d I turne d aroun d an d verball y confronte d a harasser . In tha t sam e month , anothe r studen t wa s confronte d b y a man i n th e parkin g lot at her workplace. H e face d he r with his pants down, masturbating . S o force ful an d piercing was her clamo r tha t th e ma n ha d t o releas e hi s penis t o pu t hi s hands ove r hi s ears . Th e clas s applauded . Sharin g succes s storie s provide s women wit h alternativ e possibilities for action . Thi s helps alter beliefs and , ulti mately, bodies . The succes s stories self-defensers rea d abou t ca n be a bit mor e sensationalis tic. Lik e th e succes s stories in th e N R A publicatio n American Rifleman, thos e i n Women and Guns ar e upbea t an d triumphant . The y d o no t intervie w th e woman abou t he r trauma , regre t a t takin g a life, o r disma y a t bein g th e targe t of attack in the first place. Masaad Ayoob, the renowned firearms instructo r an d founder o f th e Letha l Forc e Institute , ha s criticize d th e NRA' s glamorize d reporting o f self-defense succes s stories. In a n interview fo r th e Chicago Tribune, Ayoob declare d hi s ange r a t th e heroizin g image s i n th e American Rifleman's "armed civilians " hal l o f fame , insistin g tha t protectin g onesel f wit h a gu n should b e somethin g gu n owner s hop e neve r t o face , an d remind s the m tha t such shooters may very well have to face a criminal trial which, a t best, can wip e them ou t financially and , a t worst, lan d the m behin d bar s (Mashber g 1994) . Whatever their cost in terms of portraying the difficulties o f taking someone' s life, o r th e consequence s withi n th e crimina l justice system , eve n sensationalis tic succes s storie s allo w wome n t o imagin e that , despit e year s o f advic e an d images that hav e mad e the m believ e an d feel otherwise , the y migh t wi n a fight. Far from simply a "false sense of security," such an affirmative belie f in one's ow n capacities enhance s one' s abilities . Bandur a (1977 ) ha s show n tha t observin g someone mode l behavior no t onl y affects one' s abilit y to imitat e an d learn it bu t that expectin g and believing that on e ha s the capabilitie s actually influences per formance. Thi s i s the significanc e o f challenging th e rap e myt h tha t me n ar e s o dangerous an d wome n ar e s o vulnerable t o them . Tha t myt h actuall y become s a soma-reality. Imaginin g a new scenari o make s a new soma-realit y possible .

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At Model Muggin g an d Defending Ourselves , th e grou p cheer s eac h femal e fighter o n t o victory . A karat e instructo r note d tha t women' s ego s nee d no t b e torn dow n (th e wa y som e thin k men' s shoul d b e i n th e martia l arts) . Rather , women nee d t o b e praise d relendessly . Quigle y pat s he r student s o n th e bac k saying, "goo d job," whil e th e res t o f the wome n cla p fo r th e shooter . Thi s i s a celebration o f women's strengt h an d victory , o f fighting an d winning , o f KO s and killings . B y extension , i t i s als o a celebratio n o f women' s entitlement , o f living, surviving, and thriving. The sharin g of success stories and the group sup port ar e combine d wit h a modelin g o n th e par t o f th e instructor s o f a ne w womanhood. Thes e factor s creat e a n overal l atmospher e i n self-defense course s in which , paradoxica l a s it ma y seem , wome n ge t nurture d int o aggressivity .

Bodily Memory The coachin g i s only th e beginning : wome n hav e t o enac t th e aggressiv e pos ture. Self-defens e provide s a knowledge a t the bodil y leve l tha t i s distinct fro m that at the intellectua l level . Self-defense, then , require s muc h mor e tha n a theoretical understandin g o f bod y o r voice . Wome n mus t inscrib e i t int o thei r bodily schema . Th e sharin g o f success stories , th e modelin g o f strength o n th e part o f th e instructors , th e renegotiatio n o f medi a image s o f women , an d th e encouraging atmospher e o f women's self-defens e course s hel p wome n discar d their feminin e hesitanc y an d physica l incompetenc e an d imagin e ne w possibil ities fo r action . Bu t i t i s th e intens e physicalit y o f self-defens e courses , exem plified b y mock attacks , that accomplishe s this . In th e language o f Model Mug ging, wome n "ge t th e fight" an d i t becomes a "bodily memory. " Committing th e fighting technique s t o bodil y memor y require s practicin g assertiveness. Quigle y first instruct s wome n t o tak e o n a n assertiv e postur e i n daily life. Sh e suggest s tha t wome n mar k a man wit h thei r eyes , avoi d answer ing me n wh o as k wha t tim e i t is , an d no t worr y abou t bein g polit e t o them . Quigley's techniqu e o f havin g eac h studen t yel l obscenitie s a t he r comman d gets student s t o practic e bein g rude . Practicin g shoutin g " N O ! " forcefull y an d stating firmly, withou t smiling , "Tak e you r han d of f m y knee " hel p wome n begin t o unlear n th e enslavin g feminin e demeano r tha t prevent s the m fro m fighting effectively . Wome n ar e coache d throughou t thei r training . Fo r instance, a s wome n practic e defensiv e move s o n th e mat , padde d attacke r courses remind them , "He' s i n your space! " "Set your boundary!" an d "H e ha s no right! " Wome n receiv e encouragemen t fro m instructor s an d classmate s a s they actuall y enac t a new posture . Th e significanc e o f practicing assertivenes s is

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clear: If rapists rely on a script of femininity t o overpower women, the n wome n must begi n t o rehears e a new script . But unlik e a traditional scrip t tha t a n acto r reads, women' s script s ar e written int o thei r bodies , an d th e physica l natur e o f the instructio n begin s t o writ e a new stor y o f womanhood . Women's self-defens e course s d o no t teac h artistic , stylize d techniques . They focu s o n practica l technique s tha t an y woma n ca n us e t o disabl e a n attacker an d giv e he r tim e t o ge t awa y a s quickly a s possible. I n on e class , th e instructor constantl y repeated , "Thi s i s not Jean Claud e Van Damme. " Indeed , this i s practicin g assertivenes s unde r realisti c condition s o f fea r an d attack . Teaching wome n unde r high-stress , high-adrenalin e condition s approximate s the emotiona l an d physica l stat e unde r whic h wome n woul d hav e t o defen d themselves. On e instructo r explain s tha t teachin g wome n t o figh t unde r con ditions o f terror reinforce s i n the m technique s tha t wil l work unde r thos e con ditions, becaus e the y los e fine moto r contro l an d onl y hav e gros s moto r con trol. Sh e thu s teache s specifi c technique s tha t d o no t requir e fine moto r con trol Thi s is scrappy fighting fo r safety : "It' s not male , masculinist, Ramb o stuff . You migh t eve n hav e a bowe l movement " (Hele n Grieco , padde d attacke r instructor). Fightin g i n a high-adrenaline stat e als o enable s student s t o commi t the fighting technique s t o bodil y memory , s o tha t women' s first respons e i n a real situatio n wil l be t o fight. But before committin g fighting technique s t o bodily memory , wome n hav e to exorciz e the bodily memories tha t a sexist culture has lodged in them. Learn ing self-defense parallel s learning to driv e a car on th e opposit e sid e o f the roa d in a foreign country . Anyon e wh o ha s done this , for instanc e a n American dri ving i n Grea t Britai n o r vic e versa , know s ho w consciou s one' s action s behin d the wheel suddenl y become. Th e turning , signaling , and looking that were sec ond natur e becom e strained , stressful , an d perplexin g gestures . I n muc h th e same way , acquirin g a n aggressiv e respons e syste m take s purposefu l reflectio n and mindfu l motions . For thi s reason , classe s begi n wit h ver y slo w an d purposefu l movements , usually i n a very stric t orde r o r routine . W o m e n hav e t o thin k abou t ho w t o hit, shoot , kick , an d yell . Gainin g confidenc e i n physica l abilitie s an d over coming a fea r o f gettin g hur t ar e tw o primar y objective s o f self-defens e instruction fo r women . Man y wome n realiz e tha t the y becom e paralyze d a t the sigh t o f a gun o r an assailant . Student s learn tha t the y mus t us e their voice s for effectiv e self-defense ; man y realiz e tha t the y ar e no t accustome d t o talk ing firmly, muc h les s yelling . Althoug h som e wome n find thi s fairl y easy , most, eve n thos e wh o fee l relativel y secur e i n thei r physica l strength , find i t difficult:

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I have a pretty stron g body an d I'v e alway s been ver y confiden t tha t I can kick ass . . . . The scar y part in the cours e was the verbal stuff. When I had to us e m y voic e t o tel l the m "Ge t away, " I woul d smil e a lot. . . . Th e power o f the course was definitely th e voice and the shifting position, lik e startling th e assailan t b y takin g th e initiative . Yo u tur n th e tables . . . . I [said] "Don't " [meekly ] lik e it was never totall y m y power . . . . But I fel t the shift . (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) Still others fel t tha t the y wer e verball y assertiv e bu t lacke d th e physica l skill s t o fight. A s wome n star t ou t aimin g a gu n towar d a target , o r givin g a kic k t o a punching ba g or t o a stationary padde d attacker , the y ofte n apologiz e o r let ou t nervous laughter . After hour s o f practice employin g ver y specifi c stances , aims , punches , an d kicks, self-defenser s eventuall y lear n t o mak e decision s abou t ho w t o mov e their bodies as they encounte r specifi c situations . In Model Mugging, for exam ple, w e initiall y kno w wha t kin d o f attac k w e ar e goin g t o encounte r (e.g. , walk-by assailant , rear-grab , o r force d ora l copulatio n whil e bein g pinne d o n the ground) . I n gu n classes , we ar e initiall y tol d exactl y wha t kind s o f shots t o fire an d wher e t o fire them . As we become mor e experience d an d the moves become mor e "natural " fo r us, we becom e bette r abl e t o thin k o f appropriate technique s i n th e moment — what Mode l Muggin g instructor s calle d "seein g you r openings. " W e begi n t o apply move s spontaneousl y from a repertoire o f techniques. Th e moc k attack ers becom e mor e an d mor e spontaneou s a s well , forcin g u s t o thin k an d ac t quickly, spottin g ope n target s ( a knee, a n eye , a groin, a face) an d decidin g o n appropriate moves , i n th e momen t unde r peril . Thi s "assessing " an d "spli t attention" i s especiall y necessar y fo r student s i n th e multipl e assailant s padde d attacker course . I n martia l art s classes , student s begi n t o fight agains t unantici pated type s and levels of attack. I n firearms classes , students eventuall y spee d u p the pac e an d spontaneit y wit h whic h the y shoot . Th e feminin e gesture s gradu ally g o b y th e waysid e a s women practic e consciou s contro l o f thei r response s ("I'm no t goin g t o smil e thi s time") . A s women adjus t t o usin g thei r bodie s i n new ways , thei r confidenc e an d readines s t o fight bloom . In learning how t o stop attackers in their tracks, self-defensers lear n tha t rap e is a process no t a n inevitability . I t become s clea r tha t rap e i s " a scripte d inter action in which on e person audition s for th e role o f rapist and strives to maneu ver anothe r perso n int o th e rol e o f victim" (Marcu s 1992 , 391) . Self-defenser s learn ho w t o deplo y thei r bodies , includin g thei r voices , i n way s tha t surpris e and overpowe r th e assailant , disablin g hi m o r simpl y allowin g th e self-defense r to escap e t o safety . Crucia l t o self-defens e instructio n i s the demystificatio n o f

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rape culture' s myth s abou t fighting back . Wome n no t onl y lear n tha t the y ar e much stronge r tha n the y thought , bu t als o tha t me n ar e mor e vulnerabl e tha n they thought . On e studen t pu t i t thi s way : I thin k the y wer e tryin g t o educat e an d trai n peopl e t o kno w tha t the y can fight back . . . . Even a weak, light , smal l perso n ca n d o thing s like , you know , crus h someone' s kneeca p o r goug e ou t thei r eye s o r Adam' s apple o r whatever . I mea n sh e [th e instructor ] taugh t ho w t o kil l some one! Sh e stresse d tha t a lot, lik e wit h th e Adam' s appl e technique . An d I personally though t tha t wa s cool ; I was struc k b y that . (Rap e crisi s cen ter self-defens e cours e student ) Knowing yo u ca n tak e a punch i s almost a s significant a s knowing yo u ca n deliver one . A studen t elaborated : Women don' t ge t t o lear n they'r e physical ; what the y ca n d o physically , and it' s kin d o f neat t o lear n tha t yo u ca n actually—on e tim e [i n boxin g class], I got hit by a woman an d I actually got whiplash, thi s like pain sho t down al l th e wa y dow n m y ar m an d I was scared , I though t somethin g horrible ha d happened , an d i t turne d ou t I ha d whiplash . An d anothe r time a woman hi t m e an d m y fee t actuall y went of f the mat , yo u kno w I went righ t u p i n th e air . Th e surprisin g thin g wa s I wa s O K i n abou t thirty seconds . I was fine. . . . There wa s kin d o f a power i n bein g actu ally abl e t o tak e a punch . . . . An d eve n bein g abl e t o giv e it , givin g a really good stron g punch, i s kind o f a neat thing . (Padde d attacke r cours e and boxin g student ) The experienc e o f being hit in boxing classe s made thi s same student mor e sur e that sh e coul d prevai l i n a n attac k eve n i f struck, despit e th e fac t tha t student s did no t ge t hi t durin g th e moc k assault s in he r padde d attacke r courses : [The padde d attacker ] wil l preten d he' s goin g t o hi t yo u an d the n he'l l hit th e ma t nex t t o yo u o r something . Well , yo u kin d o f figure tha t i f he really hi t you , you' d b e ou t o f it ; bu t i t migh t no t b e true , mayb e yo u could tak e th e punc h an d stil l fight, eve n i f i t di d daz e you . (Padde d attacker cours e an d boxin g student ) Thus wome n lear n tha t fighting i s no t a s impossible a s they ha d imagined . Women los e fights with me n no t because o f physical size but because they hav e developed a demeanor tha t makes them unabl e t o resis t attacks effectively. Thi s sentiment i s represented o n th e T-shirt s wor n b y som e o f the Mode l Muggin g instructors an d passe d ou t o n a Xeroxed flyer tha t says , "It' s no t th e siz e o f th e woman i n th e fight, bu t th e siz e o f the fight i n th e woman. "

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As self-defensers becom e mor e awar e o f the man y ways in which me n try to manipulate wome n int o a situation o f vulnerability, th e continuu m o f sexua l violence is thrown int o sharp relief. Some students start to realize how few entidements me n grant them : I didn't understan d ho w quite politically excitin g or powerful i t was until I wen t [t o self-defens e class] . An d lik e I ge t it , it' s like , "Oooo h m y God—Right!" A s women w e get to receive a whole bunc h o f attentio n that we don't want—o r tha t w e learn tha t we want, somethin g lik e that . (Padded attacke r cours e student ) Needless t o say , self-defense trainin g help s wome n se t boundaries earl y o n s o that the y d o not wind u p in wickedly vulnerabl e situation s tha t woul d requir e more advance d skill s to get out of . The realizatio n o f your abilit y to fend of f men's advance s an d attacks come s through th e bodil y activit y o f rehearsin g powerfu l response s t o assault . Th e resulting change s i n bodily comportmen t occu r quickl y fo r self-defensers. Th e consciousness raisin g (i f I can refer t o the bodily, emotiona l transformatio n tha t takes place her e a s consciousness raising ) happen s fas t becaus e o f the do-or-die , emergency, an d visceral natur e o f the training . Muc h a s military soldier s lear n their move s precisely because high-stres s trainin g condition s forc e the m t o suf fer a physical consequenc e fo r a mistake, self-defens e trainee s underg o a serie s of intense , ofte n terrifying , bodil y experience s tha t forc e the m t o respon d t o simulated crises . I n padde d attacke r courses , fo r instance , student s wh o fai l t o deliver a knockou t blow , o r fai l t o chec k t o b e sur e the y knocke d ou t thei r attacker, ar e inevitably assaile d again. Such a training regime forces wome n int o a new set of abilities. By the end of the padded attacker cours e we simply stand, walk, or He down, not knowin g wha t kin d o f assailant w e wil l encounte r (h e might b e someon e you kno w aggressivel y comin g o n to you, a screaming psych o runnin g a t you, a ma n behind yo u who grab s you just whe n hi s friend distract s yo u by askin g you th e time). Thu s w e begin t o practice lookin g fo r ou r target area s and per forming move s tha t see m appropriat e fo r th e situation . I f we ge t pinned , w e reassess, perhaps feign cooperation , an d then begin t o fight agai n when w e have an opportunit y (suc h a s when th e assailan t put s hi s weapon dow n o r lean s his body in a way that enable s a quick leg retraction an d side thrust kic k to his head or groin) . Ideall y ther e i s no pause betwee n decidin g an d doing. I n martial art s courses, specifi c technique s an d routines evolv e int o spontaneou s response s t o surprise approache s an d grab s from a sparrin g partner . Boxin g incorporate s practiced gesture s wit h thinkin g a s well:

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There's a lot o f emotional stuf f that' s i n th e sparring . Whe n th e sparrin g is happening , yo u hav e t o us e you r mind ; it' s cerebral , an d a t th e sam e time yo u hav e t o execute . It' s lik e a chess game—wha t yo u wan t t o do , how you'r e goin g t o execut e it , ho w t o tric k them . It' s constantl y out witting th e person , an d that' s ru n i n an d o f itself . It' s a game . It' s no t about hittin g the m a s hard a s you ca n o r tryin g t o tak e the m out . That' s not it . It' s abou t tryin g t o out-d o them , bein g a smart fighter. . . . I ca n never rel y o n jus t force , s o I hav e t o out-thin k them , anticipat e wha t they're goin g to d o before the y d o it and do somethin g tha t throw s the m off balance an d tak e advantag e o f that. (Boxe r an d boxin g instructor ) In firearms courses , shootin g quickl y a t stee l plat e targets , th e location s o f which yo u d o no t kno w unti l read y t o fire, shootin g whil e walkin g towar d your target , an d shootin g afte r havin g falle n ont o th e groun d (firin g th e gu n between you r knees) als o increase the spontaneity o f the action an d incorporat e mind with physical technique. I n her firearms safet y cours e for women a t Lethal Force Institut e i n Concord , Ne w Hampshire , Ly n Bates trains women t o shoo t under stressfu l conditions , so they get used to th e feeling. Wome n discove r tha t they ca n shoo t effectivel y unde r thos e conditions . Bate s bring s i n a "garbag e mouth" t o shou t obscenitie s an d threat s t o student s wh o must , a t th e instruc tor's command , shoo t a t thei r targets . Thi s give s student s th e sens e o f traum a that the y migh t hav e whil e shooting , incorporatin g thei r fighting technique s into tha t sensibilit y yo u hav e whe n yo u ar e afraid . I n he r classes , sh e als o employs th e lowe r intensit y "spa z drill, " starte d b y shootin g instructo r Masaa d Ayoob, whic h i s wher e you hav e people aimin g at a target, tw o arm s straight out , an d you clutc h the gu n a s hard a s you ca n s o your hand s star t t o shake , o r th e instructo r will squeez e you r hand s t o mak e the m shake , an d the n yo u hav e the m shoot like that, t o prove t o the students that even the n the y can shoot lik e that an d shoo t accurately . (Ly n Bates, gu n instructor ) Since "i t i s no t eas y t o shoo t wel l unde r pressure , an d shootin g unde r pres sure i s wha t yo u mus t b e traine d an d prepare d t o d o " (Quigle y 1989 , 196) , Quigley recommend s comba t shootin g o r actio n shootin g a s a way t o "lear n to us e a handgu n safel y an d effectivel y unde r tim e constraint s an d i n stres s situations, whic h wil l prepar e yo u t o sav e you r lif e an d you r family' s life , should th e nee d arise " (ibid. , 23) . Bates als o recommends competitiv e shoot ing (o f an y kind ) t o produc e tha t sens e o f intensit y whil e shooting . Som e firearms course s hav e target s tha t mov e towar d th e shooter , wh o mus t fir e a certain numbe r o f shot s befor e th e targe t reache s her . Thi s ca n b e arrange d

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as a competition amon g th e students , intensifyin g th e stres s under whic h stu dents fire . In th e sam e wa y tha t wome n i n padde d attacke r course s lear n tha t thei r determination t o fight an d thei r surpris e o f thei r assailan t wil l giv e the m th e advantage i n th e fight, firearms student s lear n tha t thei r trainin g i n threa t man agement ca n minimize th e immediat e paralysi s that the y woul d b e likely t o fee l if attacked. Thi s involve s fo r eac h knowin g th e layou t o f he r house , havin g a "safe room, " an d getting immediately int o a position o f tactical advantage. Dal e shows hi s students th e place s i n thei r home s from whic h the y migh t shoo t an d helps the m develo p a strategy fo r hom e defens e wit h a firearm. Wome n lear n that the y mus t kee p thei r cool . Thi s doe s no t mea n denyin g fea r o r anger , bu t channeling them . Gu n instructor s sa y that thi s kind o f self-control i s the advan tage th e self-defense r wil l have ove r he r attacker . A s Quigley (ibid. , 247 ) states , "Never forget : tactic s bea t marksmanship.' * The high-adrenalin e stat e is achieved i n the mock assault s of padded attacke r courses, durin g competition s an d test s i n th e martia l arts , an d durin g th e "garbage mouth " an d th e "spa z drill " i n firearms course s (recal l tha t I was ful l of juice i n Quigley' s clas s just firing five round s a t a paper target) . Th e feeling s of fear an d degradatio n wit h whic h a n assailan t hope s t o immobiliz e a woma n get turned int o part of the feelings a self-defenser ha s while , and associates with , fighting. Thi s kin d o f control over , o r incorporatio n of , one' s feeling s i n fights becomes par t o f the self-defens e scenario . I n thi s way, self-defenser s ar e taugh t to brin g thei r mind s an d bodie s int o emotive , mea n fighting machines : There's somethin g abou t boxin g tha t i s s o ra w an d s o emotional . An d you can' t escap e if you're i n th e ring . You'v e alread y committed , you'r e already i n there . S o it forces yo u t o confron t thing s you migh t b e abl e t o avoid otherwise . It' s a catalys t really ; I mea n I don' t wan t t o b e Mis s Therapist o r anything , bu t that' s wha t I'v e noticed . (Boxe r an d boxin g instructor) In orde r t o ge t wome n t o merg e th e menta l wit h th e physical , instructor s explain th e importanc e o f "stayin g i n you r body. " I n th e martia l arts , student s are taugh t t o find thei r "ki, " a mental powe r tha t center s an d energize s them , increasing thei r strength , resolve , an d control . Instructor s stres s students ' mak ing their emotion s work fo r the m i n th e fight. Instructor s d o no t tel l women t o stop bein g afraid ; the y tel l the m t o us e thei r fea r b y turnin g i t int o ange r o r energy. Fear is what gives women th e boost of adrenaline they use to fight pow erfully. Determinatio n t o sto p the attacke r als o provides thi s boost. While som e women ge t more angr y abou t sexua l violence afte r takin g a self-defense course ,

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other self-defens e student s lear n t o rechanne l th e ange r the y alread y had . For this woman, rechannelin g he r anger was a crucial par t o f her training : I'm gettin g i n touch wit h just mor e bein g pissed , bein g angry . N o t shy ing awa y fro m that . . . . I think I' m gettin g mor e an d more t o the poin t where I don' t jus t wan t t o cry . I mean , i n general , I thin k peopl e cr y instead o f act it out in what woul d certainl y be a safer plac e o r whatever , but just a s a woman, I' m tired o f that outlet . . . . I think I'v e always bee n pissed, al l the time; I think I get really pissed at everything, a t the world , and I don' t kno w wha t t o d o wit h i t excep t ge t depressed . (Rap e crisi s center self-defens e cours e student ) Students ar e told t o asses s situations , an d are supposed t o thin k clearl y an d "coil u p " thei r energ y whe n the y ar e pinned . Karat e teache s a variet y o f response techniques—th e five anima l frolic s fo r example—whic h deman d dif ferent type s of emotional-physical energ y levels. In these ways, learning to fight involves a coordination o f thinking, feeling , an d acting. It is the assumption tha t a form o f self-defense fail s to engage a combinatio n of body-mind-spiri t tha t account s fo r it s derision b y advocate s o f some othe r form o f self-defense. On e instructo r remarke d tha t he r biggest proble m wit h some self-defens e course s is an overemphasis o n the physical without th e men tal and emotional : There ar e people who don't quit e understan d wha t the y ar e doing whe n they teac h . . . and I think par t o f it is that instructor s don' t offe r wha t I call a balance—mental an d emotional aspec t o f human being s combine d with th e physica l skills—becaus e self-defens e isn' t alway s physicall y defending yourself . And you really nee d t o make th e choice t o take car e of yourself an y way you can. And, for me, the physical defens e i s always a last resort . (Padde d attacke r cours e instructor ) Some martia l artist s thin k tha t gun s provid e a fals e securit y an d fai l t o empower wome n i n th e long ter m (e.g. , W o n g 1993 , A-15). Ye t som e gu n instructors hav e sai d tha t martia l art s ma y b e a s muc h self-delusio n a s self defense, insofa r a s they emphasiz e th e spiritua l ove r th e practical , th e ar t o f the kat a ove r th e science o f attack (e.g. , Strai n 1992) . O f course , martia l art s courses fo r women d o focus o n realisti c strategie s tha t ca n be used eve n i n an elevator, an d gu n instructor s d o emphasiz e th e rol e o f the min d i n firearms use. Mos t self-defens e instructor s see m t o agre e tha t th e wa y t o habituat e women's bodie s to a new set of beliefs—beliefs i n their ow n strength an d selfworth—is throug h a combinatio n o f physical move s an d emotiona l expres sions.

I. A padde d attacke r cours e studen t kick s th e assailant' s fac e a s her instructo r monitor s the technique . Photo by Karen Krogh.

2. A padde d attacke r course studen t land s a kick t o th e padde d attacker's face . She'l l continue t o fight until sh e deliver s a knockout blow . Photo by Karen Krogh.

3. Thi s defensiv e mov e agains t force d ora l copulatio n take s advantag e o f the woman' s free leg s and hips , whic h sh e draw s up , lock s aroun d th e assailant' s shoulders , an d the n yanks downward , hurlin g th e assailan t ont o hi s back an d leavin g hi s crotc h a n ope n target fo r striking . Photo by Karen Krogh.

4. A firearm s instructo r show s a studen t proper positioning , ho w t o lin e u p th e sights, an d shoo t th e targe t wit h a Col t .45. Photo by Garry Bryant.

5. Shootin g betwee n th e knee s whil e supine i s a useful defensiv e techniqu e i f one ha s fallen t o th e ground . Photo by Nancy Floyd.

6. Paxto n Quigley' s student s shoo t pape r target s i n a kneeling positio n o n th e rang e a t her firearm s cours e fo r women . Photo by Nancy Floyd.

7. Janet Aalfs , black bel t i n Shuri-Ryu , a n Okinawa n styl e o f karate, kick s a n imaginar y opponent a t he r dojo , Valle y Women' s Martia l Arts , Inc . Photo by Plumcakes.

8. Black bel t instructo r Janis Totty , a t Valley Women' s Martia l Arts , Inc. , demonstrates th e snak e for m i n th e Shuri-Ryu styl e o f Okinawan karate . Photo by Janet Aalfs.

9. Thre e martia l artist s belt ou t forcefu l roars a s they demonstrat e suprem e flexi bility, balance , an d strengt h i n kicking . Martial art s course s teac h wome n man y kicks t o perfor m fro m a n uprigh t posi tion. Photo by Beth Silvis.

10. A youn g studen t i n martial art s gives a heel palm strik e t o a practic e pad. Thi s strik e is intende d to lan d th e har d hee l o f the pal m a t th e botto m o f an assailant' s nose . Photo by Janet Aalfs.

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The belie f tha t a combination o f training , physica l strength , an d emotiona l strength i s require d fo r goo d self-defens e explain s wh y s o man y self-defens e instructors advocat e a variet y o f method s o f self-defens e training . Bate s an d Quigley hav e bot h take n Mode l Muggin g courses , an d recommen d the m i n addition t o firearms courses . Althoug h Women and Guns refer s t o th e "arme d sisterhood," whic h possesse s th e mean s b y whic h the y migh t "trul y tak e bac k the night " (quote d i n Wolf 1993 , 218) , the firearms instructor s I spoke wit h b y and larg e favor a variety o f self-defense technique s fo r women . For instance , th e wee k I interviewe d her , Bate s ha d bee n speakin g wit h a Model Muggin g clas s about self-defense . Weapon s instructor s recommende d a number o f other form s o f self-defense training . Ly n Bate s offer s a n assaul t pre vention lectur e cours e which , a s sh e pu t it , "introduce s th e notion s o f self defense, wh y self-defens e i s justified, wha t th e rang e o f option s o f self-defens e is, wha t th e continuu m o f force is , an d wh y n o on e metho d o f self-defens e i s good fo r ever y poin t alon g th e continuum. " By th e sam e token , martia l art s an d padde d attacke r cours e instructor s emphasize women' s abilit y t o fight wit h an d withou t weapons , explainin g tha t when wome n ar e give n weapon s i t i s as if they coul d no t fight withou t them : I alway s thin k physica l self-defens e i s onl y th e first lin e o f self-defense , and then pickin g up a weapon i s your second . Loo k a t the military : The y always train them i n hand-to-hand combat , the n the y teac h the m ho w t o use a gu n an d a han d grenade , a tan k an d a plan e an d yo u know , an d whatever. Bu t you r first lin e o f defens e i s th e physica l self-defense . Bu t [for] women , the y always go, "Here' s mace, " o r "Here' s a key chain, " o r "Here's this, " o r "Here' s a whistle," o r "Honey , th e gun' s i n th e drawe r and th e bullet s ar e over there, " o r whatever. . . . But the y neve r thin k o f women a s like , thei r first lin e o f self-defens e i s physica l becaus e like , "Women can' t hur t anyone, " "Wome n ar e weak, " "Wome n ar e no t strong." Bu t wome n ar e lik e the bes t fighters. W e hav e alway s bee n excellent fighters. W e ar e mor e agile , w e hav e a lot mor e strength—i n different way s tha n me n do . An d that' s wha t w e [instructors ] do . W e show wome n wher e thei r strength s ar e an d wher e thei r weaknesse s ar e in attacks . (Karat e instructor ) Another instructo r see s man y a student wh o wa s give n a weapon b y a man i n her life . (She' s awar e o f thi s precisel y becaus e som e o f thes e student s hav e requested tha t sh e ge t ri d o f the weapo n fo r them. ) I'm usuall y concerne d whe n a loved on e o r famil y membe r wil l g o ou t and bu y [som e kin d o f weapon] fo r the m thinking , well , i f they hav e i t inside o f them , the y ca n just pul l i t ou t an d us e it . The y decid e tha t fo r

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the othe r perso n whe n the y giv e i t t o the m an d forge t thei r [th e othe r person's] concerns . (Padde d attacke r cours e instructor ) Paxton Quigle y als o recommend s bot h hand-to-han d trainin g an d firearms training fo r self-defense : One, onc e yo u kno w ho w t o us e you r body , an d us e you r bod y a s a weapon, yo u kno w tha t you r bod y ha s a certai n amoun t o f power. Bu t then you'r e goin g th e nex t ste p because, technologicall y speaking , a gu n is more powerfu l tha n th e body. And onc e you've mastere d th e power o f your body , an d th e powe r o f th e gun , yo u hav e reache d ultimat e empowerment. Clearly, then , al l sort s o f instructor s believ e i n th e benefit s o f a variet y o f defense strategies , an d al l ca n incorporat e emotion , muscle , voice , an d wil l t o fight int o thei r pedagogica l strategy . Th e bodil y memor y make s thes e skill s stick. Thi s i s "th e fight" o r "power " wome n achiev e i n self-defens e training . This se t o f dispositions i s called "th e fighting spirit, " no t incidentally . Afte r all , the ne w bodil y comportmen t itsel f capture s a ne w will , a will t o fight. Here , we se e th e way s i n whic h rehearsin g a ne w bodil y comportmen t actuall y encompasses th e real m o f the cognitive . Model Muggin g instructor s tel l storie s o f wome n who , thank s t o bodil y memory, stoppe d assailant s years after havin g taken self-defense . Ther e wa s th e sixty-something woma n wh o knocke d a ma n ou t col d withi n on e minut e o f his assaul t o f her. Sh e ha d take n th e basi c cours e five year s earlier . The n ther e was the woman who , knocke d unconsciou s i n a n accident , kicke d a paramedi c (whose hand s wer e makin g thei r wa y u p he r leg , checkin g i t fo r possibl e bro ken bones), sending him sailin g clear across the room. Sh e wrote th e paramedi c a lette r o f apology . A s thes e storie s illustrate , ou r fighting gesture s becom e a s automatic a s our feminin e gesture s ha d been .

The Significance of Physicality and Pleasure to Training The sensoria l natur e o f the activit y present s th e stake s o f self-defense—you ca n smell them an d fee l the m a s the adrenalin e rushe s throug h you r body . Fightin g or shooting while som e big smelly, swearing, sweat-dripping thu g is going afte r you o r yellin g a t yo u make s yo u tangibly , organicall y investe d i n th e scene . Despite th e unpleasantness o f these attack simulations, ther e i s a certain pleasur e in th e aggression , whic h stem s fro m th e fas t pace , th e heightene d adrenalin e state, an d th e physica l an d emotiona l consequence s o f fighting. Wome n trai n

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not onl y t o ensur e physica l survival ; they trai n fo r dignity , t o surviv e sociall y as people wit h a certain sens e o f entitlemen t (whic h assailant s tr y t o den y them) . In thi s way, th e increase d sens e o f value a woman ha s for hersel f is etched ont o the body throug h a series of aggressive words an d gestures , an explosio n o f gu n powder, o r mayb e eve n a series o f punches an d kick s t o music . The physicalit y o f the practice , th e emotiona l characte r o f the venture , an d the sensoria l characte r o f the atmospher e solidif y i n wome n a new body . On e student explained : "Havin g someon e [th e padde d attacker ] physicall y assaul t you, or having that man [th e padded attacker] lay on top of you, like this is what it would b e like , like they put yo u righ t i n it . So , like, you're there , and it' s no t just hypothetical " (padde d attacke r cours e student) . One instructo r sai d that th e physicality o f self-defense trainin g i s what make s th e differenc e ove r al l sorts o f traditional consciousnes s raising : " I spen t years i n rallies , feminist therapy , etc. , and whe n I ge t a woman i n he r bod y fo r fort y hour s an d sh e ha s a kinestheti c experience o f he r power , that' s a majo r difference " (Hele n Grieco , padde d attacker cours e instructor) . I n hi s interview s wit h wome n wh o too k Mode l Mugging, John Gaddi s (1990 ) als o hear d thi s theme : I'm a lot mor e sensitiv e t o m y boundaries—thi s bega n durin g th e train ing, an d I prefac e thi s wit h sayin g prio r t o th e trainin g I ha d studie d boundaries, an d disorder s o f boundaries , throug h therapy , psycholog y school, AA, Adult Childre n o f Alcoholics, etc. , and I had don e a little bi t of "boundar y work" ; bu t i n Mode l Muggin g I di d th e rea l work— I became hyperawar e o f m y boundaries . (Padde d attacke r cours e student , in ibid. , 166-67 ) A woma n I spok e wit h explained : "Wherea s therap y ma y tak e weeks , t o tal k about it , thi s just bring s i t up immediately . . . . I go int o thes e reall y intellectua l things, wherea s th e bod y just need s t o g o 'whoa , lik e wha t ar e yo u doing ? It' s not OK. ' It' s a nic e clea n feeling " (padde d attacke r cours e student) . Self defensers d o no t just thin k abou t assertiveness ; the y practic e it . Tha t th e prac tice engage s th e body , th e mind , an d th e emotion s i s critical. Fo r femininit y i s embodied, sensual , an d habitual ; thi s i s ho w i t get s disembodie d an d replace d with th e fighting spirit . The fightin g spiri t is a new body , a new idea , an d a new feeling. The energ y o f th e fightin g spiri t i s extremel y intense . I n karate , bein g around th e wome n wh o ar e s o committe d an d self-possessed , visibl e throug h their piercin g eye s focuse d o n th e physica l task s before them , audibl e throug h their grunts, shouts, and feet stomping , olfactor y throug h th e smell of sweat an d dust so characteristic o f gyms and dojos. You ca n feel the determination i n thei r

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grip, and taste it when it' s your tur n t o ea t the mat . O n th e range the smell s an d sounds ar e different—gu n powder , sometime s th e grea t outdoors , th e startlin g sound o f gunfire an d th e clankin g o f steel plate targets—bu t th e overal l atmos phere i s much th e same: a stirring sensorial one tha t engage s the body. Even th e fitness self-defens e courses , with th e sweaty , scantil y clad bodies and th e intens e vibration o f the speaker s blaring music an d o f your fee t bouncin g u p an d dow n on th e har d woo d floor , mak e fo r a sensory experienc e tha t instill s a sensibilit y about usin g self-defense , meldin g min d an d muscle . Thes e maniaca l moments , inspired b y a n endorphi n rush , mak e self-defens e fu n t o practic e an d a n all encompassing experienc e i n which yo u ar e no longe r thinkin g clearl y o r delib erately moving your body, bu t simpl y stepping, kicking , punching, o r shootin g in harmony wit h th e music, the energy o f others, or the instructor's commands . Women fin d tha t masterin g th e challenge s o f getting ou t o f holds an d han dling weapons tha t heretofor e woul d hav e left the m baffle d an d feeling helples s gives them a sense of pride, accomplishment, an d bodily mastery. Thi s itself can turn int o a physical "high, " whic h make s wome n reall y "need " an d enjo y th e fights. Fo r instance , afte r watchin g othe r wome n fight i n Mode l Mugging , occasionally th e instructor' s assistan t woul d mentio n tha t sh e "neede d a mug ging," t o giv e he r a sense o f "release " afte r watchin g s o man y bout s fro m th e sidelines. B y th e sam e token , wome n ofte n leav e thei r lesson s draine d o f energy, becaus e moc k fight s an d intens e shootin g experience s boos t th e adren aline and then leave them feeling drained . (Wome n sometime s say that they fee l they coul d g o hom e an d slee p th e res t o f the da y afte r a self-defense class. ) In on e o f my firs t self-defens e courses , I heard a more experience d woma n remark tha t sh e really enjoye d th e sparrin g that too k plac e in th e moc k attacks . I wa s stunned . Ca n we , shoul d we , actuall y enjo y moc k combat ? A boxin g instructor tol d m e tha t whethe r a woman take s u p boxin g fo r th e grea t upper body workout , fo r som e self-defens e training , o r fo r th e one-on-on e combat , the sparrin g i s what capture s th e heart s o f all. Sh e explained : When the y ge t thei r punche s dow n an d al l the foo t work , the n w e star t sparring, that' s actuall y th e mos t fu n fo r al l types o f them. . . . The feel ing is , when yo u wer e a kid, di d yo u eve r hav e friend s yo u coul d hors e around with ? It' s tha t feeling— a fu n wa y t o se e ho w powerfu l yo u are . (Boxer an d boxin g instructor ) The pleasurabl e characte r o f combativ e bodil y practice s n o doub t reflect s th e pleasurable characte r o f becoming a new kin d o f woman. Self-defensers ' ne w body-selves ar e celebrate d throughou t th e course , an d solidifie d a t th e con clusion o f man y self-defens e courses . Th e transformatio n fro m nic e gir l int o

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mean woma n i s ritually marke d i n man y self-defens e course s wit h graduatio n rituals. For example , Model Muggin g student s ar e presented wit h roses , whic h symbolize th e ne w wome n the y become : beautiful , bu t wit h thorn s fo r pro tection. O n th e las t day in padded attacke r courses , women invit e friend s an d famil y members t o watc h thei r fights an d chee r the m on . Ofte n forme r student s als o attend—and ar e pulle d ou t o f th e audienc e b y th e mugger s fo r a spontaneou s fight. Plent y o f hugs , food , and , sometimes , memento s g o around . I n Paxto n Quigley's course , severa l student s lef t wit h "Arme d an d Female " T-shirt s an d tiny handgu n brooches . Student s als o too k hom e th e target s the y shot , auto graphed b y Quigley , an d wen t ou t fo r drinks . Th e targe t ma y see m lik e a n insignificant ritua l marker . Bu t I' m sur e I wasn't th e onl y on e wh o actuall y pu t the bullet-torn targe t u p o n th e wall . I t symbolize d m y ow n passag e from fem inine incompetence—muc h a s m y first pai r o f hig h heel s marke d m y passag e into it . The joy o f witnessin g th e transformatio n i s wha t instructor s routinel y tol d me wa s th e mos t rewardin g par t o f teaching . Self-defens e instructor s ar e no t simply helpin g wome n avoi d futur e assaults . Self-defenser s ar e no t onl y takin g back th e night ; the y ar e takin g back thei r bodies. I f women a s a group ar e ren dered powerles s b y th e pervasivenes s o f sexua l violence , the n self-defens e instructors are "deprogramming" wome n int o a new bodily sensibility that doe s not fit s o well wit h mal e domination . A n instructo r explaine d tha t self-defens e will spil l ove r int o area s besides sexua l assault : If wome n lear n t o physicall y defen d themselve s the y ar e mor e likel y going t o defen d themselve s i n othe r areas—tak e a stan d i n thei r work , with thei r competitors, in their family life. And I'v e see n it and I'v e hear d it so I know tha t it's very much a part of standing up, taking care of them selves an d al l that. (Padde d attacke r cours e instructor ) The change s migh t b e describe d a s becoming a "bette r woman, " "mor e o f a woman," o r "mor e myself, " a s one karat e instructo r explained : Being reall y excite d t o se e peopl e becom e mor e themselves—whic h i s really what thi s whole thin g is about—that's wha t it' s been abou t fo r me . It's realizin g tha t I was no t completel y myself , an d I will neve r b e com pletely myself , bu t tha t feelin g mor e an d mor e like , O h I' m doin g wha t I want t o do, I'm takin g up space in the world, like you know , wha t mor e could yo u want , right ? (Jane t Aalfs , karat e instructor ) To ge t th e fighting spirit , self-defenser s lear n a ne w se t o f reflexe s tha t encompass attitude , will , spirit, body, an d technique . Th e chang e i s quite liter -

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ally metamorphic . Wha t wa s once ingraine d an d felt s o natural, femininity , i s displaced b y a new learned-and-ingrained bodil y disposition . Th e end result is like finally gettin g use d t o drivin g a ca r o n th e other side o f th e road . Self defensers internaliz e a new bodily disposition , bu t no t fro m a natura l stat e o f passivity an d helplessness. For th e "nic e girl " i s itself a bodily dispositio n previousl y internalize d and , until self-defense , mostl y take n fo r grante d a s natural. Thu s i t i s not tha t self defense inscribe s a set of "unnatural" rule s ont o th e naturall y docil e bodie s o f women. No r i s it tha t patriarcha l cultur e ha s enforced a set of rules ont o th e bodies o f women an d self-defensers finally fre e themselve s o f any rules , disci plines, or ideologies. No r is it that wome n i n self-defense ar e unleashing a nat urally aggressiv e instinct . Self-defensers replac e a n ol d embodie d cod e wit h a ne w one— a mor e pleasurable on e an d a differentl y consequentia l one . I n th e contex t o f self defense, imitatio n become s mimesis . Tha t is , conscious act s o f female aggres sion (imitation ) becom e ne w aspects o f who th e women are , such that , muc h as they di d not think o f the feminin e disposition s the y ha d when the y arrive d to thei r first self-defens e clas s as imitative, the y n o longer thin k o f themselves as imitating anythin g i n actin g aggressivel y (Bourdie u 1990 , 73). By the end, self-defensers hav e effecte d a n art of living, base d o n a new aesthetics o f existence.

Consequences of Metamorphosis Students mentio n tha t th e emotional par t o f self-defense i s so much mor e tha n the physical , no t only becaus e the y realiz e how often me n assert thei r privileg e in everyda y situation s (whic h d o not involve a sexual assaul t an d a response o f physical self-defense) , bu t also because the y develo p a new habitus, with a new set o f values that ge t projected ou t from thi s disposition. I n this way, the physical and the emotional impac t o f self-defense trainin g are inseparable. Women' s socialized feminin e bodie s tha t ha d been livin g th e experience o f womanhoo d change. Self-defens e constitute s a habituating orde r tha t install s itself right int o the dail y live s o f the students. Th e consequenc e i s a new way of being i n the world. The followin g women' s statement s tel l somethin g abou t th e significance o f both th e fear o f violence i n women's live s and learning ho w to fight back . Fo r their sens e o f confidenc e an d securit y i n genera l ha s been altered , whic h ha s implications fo r their live s whether o r not someone eve r assault s them :

The Fighting Spirit | 11 7 Before I felt equa l and no w I feel better. I used t o feel I had mor e bound aries—I'm a woman s o I have t o g o int o th e educatio n field. I married a big, mach o man . Yo u kno w wha t I mean ? I neve r reall y though t o f i t before. I fee l stronger . I fee l lik e th e knowledg e I hav e make s m e fee l stronger. I feel lik e I ca n defen d mysel f if I need to . I feel saf e b y mysel f now. I' m no t afrai d t o be in my house alone. I don't fee l like a wimp any more. I don't reall y eve r fee l afrai d anymore . Th e las t thin g I want t o d o is go t o a n AT M a t night , bu t I don't reall y fee l afraid . (Gu n student ) I think i t kin d o f goes into othe r area s o f my life . [Lik e what?] Lik e talk ing mor e confidentl y i n general . I mea n I don' t always talk confidentl y but I' m awar e whe n I don't . (Rap e crisi s cente r self-defens e cours e stu dent) Hopefully I'l l neve r hav e tha t happen , usin g i t i n self-defense . Bu t I fee l a little mor e confiden t physicall y an d als o a little mor e awar e abou t ho w to handle situations without havin g to do something physical. . . . I always kind o f felt strong , becaus e I have a bit o f a sports background. An d no w it's a little mor e menta l confidence . (Karat e student ) Women lear n a new se t o f assertive response s t o variou s form s o f intimida tion, threat , an d harassmen t tha t fal l alon g th e continuu m o f sexua l violence . Self-defensers sometime s remar k o n th e "littl e assaults " the y respon d t o wit h "little defenses. " On e instructo r explained , The physica l aspect is such a little part o f what self-defens e is . We wome n are alway s defendin g ourselve s al l th e time , jus t th e littl e slur s o n th e street, th e looks , th e stares , interactin g wit h a bos s o r teache r that' s no t taking you seriously . That' s al l self-defense. That' s th e harde r par t o f selfdefense. (Chimer a instructor ) One woma n wh o too k a clas s offere d b y he r loca l rap e crisi s cente r (whic h included practic e o f verbal defens e skill s an d explanations , bu t no t practice , o f physical defense ) foun d th e verba l assertivenes s th e mos t importan t aspec t o f self-defense training : I'm muc h mor e awar e of , I mean, I grew u p i n N e w York , an d I just, I can't remembe r a time whe n I wasn't harasse d o n th e stree t o n almos t a daily occurrence . . . . I t i s m y mai n experienc e o f harassmen t directe d against me an d m y mai n experienc e o f being s o incredibly frustrated . . . . Verbally I think I' m eve n mor e incline d t o sa y no. Yo u know , no t eve n address th e comment , bu t just tur n an d yel l " N O ! " o r whatever , some thing. An d th e feelin g tha t I ha d i n tha t clas s wit h jus t sayin g tha t wa s really something positive, really empowering and , yeah, I think I' m mor e

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likely t o d o that . . . . Physicall y I' m no t sure . (Rap e crisi s cente r self defense cours e student ) Some wome n remarke d tha t thei r increase d self-confidenc e i s a psycholog ical effect o f their trainin g an d concomitan t sens e o f strength, distinc t fro m th e utility o f thei r fightin g technique s fo r specifi c threats . Fo r instance , a boxe r explained tha t sh e think s boxin g i s not reall y th e bes t for m o f self-defense, bu t feels confiden t nevertheless : The feelin g I have no w i s different fro m wha t I had before . I t feels lik e a sense o f powe r bu t it' s reall y abou t confidence . I don' t fee l afrai d any where I go , eve n i f it' s i n a ba d neighborhood . An d i t ma y b e foolis h because someon e coul d pul l a gu n o r something . Bu t I just don' t hav e that fea r anymore . Identifyin g yoursel f a s a fighte r an d a s somebod y o f strength. (Boxe r an d boxin g instructor ) A rape crisi s center self-defens e cours e student , wh o explaine d tha t sh e was less certain abou t th e physica l aspec t o f self-defense tha n abou t th e verbal , stil l feel s increased confidence : I thin k tha t I' m mor e confident . Tha t I d o fee l a little mor e threatene d but I also fee l toughe r an d s o when I ge t ont o th e subway , yo u know , I look around , I make ey e contact wit h people, I have my back t o th e wall, and I just—that's, yo u know , kin d o f common , i t wa s wha t I alway s knew fro m whe n I was little, but I do thin k I' m mor e confiden t abou t it . (Rape crisi s cente r self-defens e cours e student ) These statement s shoul d no t b e dismisse d a s some naiv e "fals e sens e of secu rity." Researc h ha s show n tha t a confiden t demeano r i s a deterren t t o attack , and a woman's belie f that sh e can fight, alon g with th e concomitan t willingnes s to put u p a fight, ar e central components t o thwarting attacks successfully i n th e vast majorit y o f situations. A studen t fro m anothe r rap e crisi s cente r cours e (i n which n o actua l physi cal fighting wa s practiced) explained , What wa s mos t valuabl e t o m e ou t o f th e whol e clas s was no t s o muc h the actua l physica l knowledg e o f wher e t o plac e you r kic k o r ho w t o throw a punch , becaus e actuall y I'v e mostl y forgotte n tha t becaus e I haven't practiced . Bu t what wa s valuable was the awarenes s that I got ou t of i t tha t I coul d d o this . . . . Thing s tha t the y tol d u s lik e an y kin d o f resistance i s usuall y goin g t o scar e of f mos t attackers . . . i f you yel l an d you see m toug h an d read y t o fight the n yo u know , mos t o f your attack ers will no t continue . . . . Just th e ide a tha t i t is better t o b e lou d an d ou t

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there an d sayin g " N O , GE T AWA Y F R O M M E " tha n t o just b e kin d of all "don' t hur t me , eek " kin d o f thing. (Rap e crisi s cente r cours e stu dent) Another woma n expresse d a similar sens e o f psychological relie f or comfor t from he r training , whic h result s i n greate r socia l maneuverability : It frees m e u p t o no t hav e to thin k abou t [defendin g mysel f and safety ] al l the time . . . . I n genera l I' m mor e confiden t an d mor e abl e t o d o mor e or les s what I want to , g o wher e I want to . . . . Like bein g alon e wit h a man I don't kno w ver y well . (Karat e student , i n Tura j 1993 , 58 ) That statemen t als o provides on e answe r t o th e questio n o f whether preparin g oneself fo r violenc e amount s t o puttin g o n a pair o f goggle s tha t mak e ever y man loo k lik e a potentially violen t monster . Whe n a woman learn s tha t sh e i s not inherentl y vulnerabl e an d me n ar e no t inherentl y Herculean , he r sens e o f vulnerability and , alon g with it , he r idea s about me n chang e dramatically . Me n become les s threatening , no t mor e so . Man y self-defenser s als o becam e mor e comfortable goin g to anxiety-provoking areas , and became more physically ori ented i n genera l (Gaddi s 1990 , 97-99) . Learning t o fight bac k als o simpl y feel s liberatin g an d pleasurable : It fel t grea t t o kic k th e shi t ou t o f a six-foo t two-inc h gu y [servin g a s padded attacke r fo r th e class] . (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) For me , i t wa s incredible . I t reall y mad e m e fee l good , an d s o muc h les s powerless. I mea n i t reall y gav e m e a perspectiv e tha t I don' t thin k I' d ever ha d before . . . . I fel t lik e I learne d a lot an d I reall y fel t different . (Rape crisi s cente r self-defens e cours e student ) The increase d confidenc e an d pleasur e i n th e us e o f one' s physica l strengt h cause man y wome n t o develo p mor e athleti c interest s afte r takin g som e for m of self-defense. On e woma n commente d tha t she got more involve d wit h othe r sports afte r sh e began t o box : I thin k I'v e gotte n mor e involve d i n sports . I'v e neve r eve r i n m y lif e been involve d in sports. I hated sports, I was absolutely worthless at them . I've take n a n interes t i n baseball . I fee l lik e recreationall y I coul d pla y sports, like i f people wer e playin g volleyball, wherea s befor e I didn't lik e to becaus e I just sucked . (Boxin g student ) A self-defens e cours e i s the first tim e man y wome n full y experienc e thei r bod ies a s activ e agents . Youn g (1990 , 147 ) suggest s tha t wome n experienc e thei r bodies a s things a t th e sam e tim e tha t the y experienc e thei r bodie s a s a mean s

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for th e enactmen t o f their aims. Indeed, th e experience o f routine sexua l objec tification an d the constan t threa t o f sexual assault encourage wome n t o fee l tha t their bodie s ar e no t their - own. Women i n self-defens e classe s ofte n realiz e tha t the y hav e learne d t o with hold ful l bodil y commitmen t t o things , like fighting o r yelling. Severa l instruc tors sai d tha t overcomin g th e fea r o f hurtin g someon e wa s a primary obstacl e they mus t hel p thei r student s overcome . Fo r som e women , th e transitio n fro m an acted-upon , looked-a t bod y t o a n active , forcefu l bod y i s painfully difficult . One woma n i n Mode l Muggin g bega n t o cr y while watchin g th e videotap e o f her powerfu l figh t agains t th e padde d attacker , explainin g tha t sh e kne w she' d had a good fight , bu t al l she could focus o n was how fa t sh e looked. He r painfu l struggle illustrate s th e enormou s powe r o f women' s sens e o f themselve s a s objects, an d th e difficult y o f struggling t o transfor m tha t int o a n experienc e o f themselves as actors. But the transformatio n doe s take place, a transformation i n embodiment tha t ma y explai n wh y self-defens e enhance s self-confidenc e an d even help s som e wome n overcom e eatin g disorders . But a s Young (ibid. , 155 ) point s out , a woma n i s damne d i f sh e doe s an d damned i f sh e doesn't . A woman' s distanc e fro m he r bod y an d physica l hesi tancy may come from seein g herself as a sex object fo r others . And yet, she mus t keep hersel f "close d in " becaus e t o us e he r bod y freel y i s t o "invite " sexua l objectification (no t t o mentio n claim s o f crassness) . Thu s keepin g i n you r enclosed spac e i s a defens e agains t bein g leere d at , touched , an d accuse d o f inviting rape . Throug h self-defens e instruction , wome n los e a certai n bodil y comportment o f femininity—of watchin g tha t thei r breast s ar e no t expose d a s they ben d over , o f keepin g thei r leg s crossed , actin g demure , an d lookin g down. A boxin g studen t remarke d o n this : " I fee l stronger , m y confidenc e i s up, I feel lik e I look better . I carry mysel f better. Befor e I walked aroun d wit h hunched-over shoulders , lookin g a t th e ground , just no t rea l secur e i n myself . N o w I just fee l reall y good " (boxin g student) . Self-defens e teache s wome n t o make eye contact. When wome n "mark " othe r people with thei r eyes, they ar e not developin g a paranoid publi c demeanor . Me n d o no t generall y aver t thei r eyes. If women hav e learned t o avoi d ey e contact wit h men , i t is because o f the fear tha t makin g ey e contac t woul d b e misconstrue d a s a sexua l invitation . Gone i s th e treatmen t o f me n a s brutes tha t wome n ar e responsibl e fo r con trolling throug h a serie s o f "modest " gestures . Wome n hav e a line o f defens e beyond controllin g th e body i n ways that avoi d objectificatio n o r sexua l "invi tation." Perhaps thi s i s why som e self-defenser s not e a change i n thei r bod y image s and style s o f dress . Gaddi s (1990 ) foun d tha t women' s sens e o f physica l an d

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emotional self-acceptanc e increase d a s a resul t o f thei r involvemen t wit h self defense. On e studen t explained , I've bee n exposin g mysel f more i n man y ways , sharing my feelings , shar ing m y thoughts , m y experiences , sharin g m y bod y i n term s o f dressin g more femininel y o r mor e revealingl y [instea d o f hidin g m y body ] . . . before Mode l Mugging , unles s I fel t m y bod y wa s absolutel y perfec t I wouldn't b e see n i n publi c i n a bikini. N o w I fee l abl e t o la y ou t i n th e sun an d actuall y fel t goo d abou t mysel f i n a little bikini— I eve n bough t myself a new on e t o celebrat e th e ne w me . (Padde d attacke r cours e stu dent, i n ibid. , 94 ) Another woma n sai d tha t sh e use d t o g o ou t o f her wa y t o avoi d appearin g i n public i n he r exercis e clothes , but now , fo r instance , wil l stop a t the marke t o n her wa y hom e fro m th e gy m i f it's mor e convenien t t o d o so . I n providin g a sense tha t on e nee d no t presen t onesel f i n way s tha t eithe r pleas e o r tempe r men, self-defens e allow s women t o tak e less responsibility tha n the y ha d previ ously fo r a man's interes t i n rapin g them . Another self-defense r note d a change i n he r dres s style : I'm no t sur e i f this i s related t o boxing , bu t sinc e I'v e starte d boxing— I used t o dres s in comba t boots an d flannel shirt s and lately I'v e bee n dress ing more sophisticated , stuf f more tailored , I think it' s kind o f ironic tha t since I'v e starte d boxin g m y wardrob e ha s change d lik e this . [Wha t d o you mak e o f the change? ] I feel there' s a real feminine sid e to me an d rea l masculine sid e t o me . Th e boxin g show s m y masculin e side , an d befor e the clothin g showe d m y masculin e side . (Boxin g student ) While thi s studen t stil l associate s toughnes s wit h masculinity , he r experienc e with self-defens e seem s to allow her a greater range in self-expression. He r abil ity to fight, whic h sh e deems her "masculin e side, " may be a more centra l com ponent o f her self-conception tha n he r clothing . Another woman I interviewe d said sh e wear s mor e dresse s no w tha t sh e ha s ha d self-defens e training . He r explanation reveal s th e wa y he r self-defens e trainin g seem s mor e authenti c t o her than th e clothin g she had worn t o look tough . Sh e said she had worn toug h clothing a s "a front" becaus e sh e felt vulnerabl e bu t actuall y di d not kno w ho w to fight. Sh e feel s mor e latitud e no w tha t sh e actuall y ha s confidenc e tha t sh e can fight. In contrast , th e styl e renegotiation s o f othe r self-defenser s ra n i n th e othe r direction. On e studen t bough t a pai r o f Do c Marte n bran d orthopedi c boot s that ar e style d afte r comba t boots , whil e a second self-defense r ha d a new feel ing abou t th e boot s sh e alread y owned :

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They're bi g heav y boots , I coul d reall y hur t somebod y ba d wit h thos e boots. Give n tha t so much o f the self-defense i s kicking, and they're lace d boots tha t don' t com e off , they'r e ver y heavy . Definitel y [self-defense ] had somethin g t o d o wit h m y desir e t o bu y thos e particula r boots . (Padded attacke r cours e student ) Sometimes whe n I wea r m y boot s I fee l lik e I ca n kic k ass . (Padde d attacker cours e student ) Whether thes e wome n adopte d thi s styl e becaus e o f a commitmen t t o defen d themselves o r becaus e o f a new aestheti c tha t seeme d t o merg e wit h tha t abil ity, the y just migh t chang e wha t i t mean s t o b e a "knockout. " Thi s i s perhap s the first tim e i n Nort h America n histor y wher e wome n ar e makin g fashio n choices based on an entirely different aesthetic : stopping power, damag e power . It's no w comfortable , functional , an d perhap s eve n attractiv e (a t least bearable ) to kee p th e siz e an d shap e o f th e foo t intact , rathe r tha n squeez e i t int o a tin y pump t o mak e i t look smaller , wit h a n elevate d hee l t o mak e th e le g look thin ner an d forcefu l walkin g impossible . Women' s fashion s hav e inhibite d thei r movements, making a manly bodily comportment impossible , and making mal e protection necessary , a t least symbolically . Thinkin g o f what one' s fee t ca n d o in a particular pair of shoes, rather tha n what one' s legs look lik e in them, seem s to b e a step forward . But self-defens e offer s mor e tha n a new bodil y comportmen t o r combativ e aesthetic. Wome n credi t thei r self-defens e course s fo r al l kinds o f change s the y make i n thei r lives—lik e gettin g divorced , startin g thei r ow n businesses , goin g back to school, confronting a n abuser, and getting over an eating disorder. I t was common t o hea r wome n sa y thing s like : "Th e physica l par t o f self-defens e i s only 'this ' much [pinchin g thumb an d forefinger almos t together ] an d th e emo tional par t i s 'THIS 9 muc h [stretchin g arm s ou t wide]. " On e instructo r remarked o n th e transformation , whic h sh e see s routinel y i n he r student s afte r their completion o f her course, and its extension into many aspect s of their lives: [The transformation ] i s very swif t an d it' s ver y excitin g bu t I know tha t it continues . The y mov e on ; the y en d unhealth y relationships ; the y qui t their jobs; the y g o bac k t o school . The y jump ou t o f planes! They clim b mountains; the y star t ne w businesses . I mea n the y jus t reac h a plac e within themselve s tha t they ca n do more tha n the y have and they unleas h that chai n o r th e wall , o r howeve r yo u wan t t o labe l i t with tha t person , to pursu e othe r thing s i n life . . . . I'v e ha d student s wal k i n her e mayb e six months late r and I don't eve n recogniz e he r becaus e she' s so proud o f her appearanc e an d he r body . (Padde d attacke r cours e instructor )

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A studen t pu t i t thi s way: "Fightin g would'v e bee n th e farthes t thin g from m y mind an d m y identity ; no w I conside r mysel f a fighter. Yo u can' t reall y b e a woman unles s yo u hav e tha t strength " (padde d attacke r cours e student) . Thi s karate studen t explaine d tha t man y aspect s o f he r lif e ha d changed , includin g her dream s a t night : My dream s ove r tim e hav e change d from bein g alway s stopped an d hid ing and people tryin g to kil l me an d rap e m e t o where righ t i n th e drea m I woul d sa y " I kno w karate. " An d I would eithe r sto p the m fro m doin g it righ t ther e o r wak e u p just a s I wa s abou t t o an d the n othe r time s I' d be fighting back . An d I kno w tha t wha t wa s happenin g wa s a rea l shif t like i n m y understandin g o f wh o I a m i n th e worl d an d wha t I ca n do . (Karate student , i n Tura j 1993 , 61) One o f the mos t strikin g transformation s I found reporte d b y women wh o took self-defens e wa s a greater sens e o f courag e aroun d me n i n everyda y sit uations. I heard man y storie s o f women wh o notice d tha t the y wer e les s willing t o pu t u p wit h everyda y intimidation , insults , an d abuse . Give n tha t th e threat o f sexua l violenc e give s forc e t o men' s intimidatio n an d harassmen t o f women, an d women' s fea r o f tha t violenc e lie s behin d thei r capitulatio n t o men's insults , i t shoul d hardl y b e surprisin g tha t self-defens e trainin g ha s thi s result. A nurs e wh o too k thre e padde d attacke r course s an d bega n boxin g afte r that, describe d th e transformatio n i n he r relationship s wit h me n a t he r work place: I didn't realiz e until afte r I took Mode l Muggin g tha t when I was aroun d the doctor s I felt lik e I didn't exist . I felt lik e I was thi s little mous e run ning aroun d i n betwee n al l thes e big , importan t me n an d tha t the y did n't eve n recogniz e m y existence , tha t I didn't eve n hav e a right t o expec t them t o recogniz e wh o I was , an d tha t the y wer e obviousl y fa r superio r to me. Once I took Model Mugging—it wasn' t like I thought al l the doc tors wer e goin g t o bea t m e up—bu t someho w i t gav e m e a sens e o f I have a righ t t o b e here , I d o exist , yo u hav e t o recogniz e me , I hav e a right t o challeng e you , an d I have a right t o tel l you wha t I want. An d i t kind o f made m e fee l equa l t o th e doctors . (Padde d attacke r cours e an d boxing student ) Other students ' comment s sugges t tha t the y to o stan d u p t o me n mor e ofte n a s a result o f their self-defens e training : I a m n o longe r a s afrai d t o voic e m y opinion s t o men , o r anyone , bu t especially t o men . (Padde d attacke r cours e student )

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Model Muggin g certainl y stoppe d [m y boyfriend ] from forcin g se x o n me al l the time . After th e Mode l Muggin g I didn't le t hi m d o tha t t o m e anymore. (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) Somehow I go t ove r th e fea r o f men. Mayb e tha t wa s Mode l Muggin g and therapy . Certai n me n intimidate d me . Me n star e a t lunc h an d i t dawned o n m e tha t I wa s scared . An d the n i t dawne d o n me , I wa s n o longer intimidated . (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) It actuall y helpe d m e dea l wit h people , an d I' m no t timi d an d scare d o f people. (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) I'm les s timid. (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) My observation s ar e confirme d b y thos e o f Gaddi s (1990) . On e woma n h e interviewed explaine d he r increase d sens e o f entitlement t o boundaries : I'm pron e t o sa y something a lot mor e quickl y whe n peopl e infring e o n me. Fo r exampl e a t work I' m usuall y no t a demonstrative person . I hav e a mal e friend wh o I occasionall y allo w t o hu g me , providin g h e first as k my permission. Recently , h e trie d to hug me without m y permission an d I backe d off , pu t u p m y han d an d sai d " N o . " I n th e pas t I woul d hav e given in , t o no t creat e a scene o r embarras s th e othe r person . . . . I use d to b e s o concerne d abou t takin g car e o f the boundarie s o f others, t o th e detriment o f my own . (Padde d attacke r cours e student , i n ibid. , 155 ) This boxin g studen t explaine d tha t he r actua l fighting brough t bac k painfu l memories o f abuse, rendering he r physically helpless during a match, ultimatel y leading t o a more healed , assure d state : I was in an abusive relationship for three years, and it kind o f brought tha t up—when I spar with my trainer it kind of brought al l that up again. For tunately I hav e a n understandin g trainer . [Wa s i t therapeutic? ] Yes . I think fo r a long time I didn't thin k i t really affected m e a s much a s it did . I thought tha t since I had gotten ou t o f the relationship I had kind of gotten ove r it. Thi s on e nigh t w e wer e havin g a particularly intens e sparrin g match an d al l o f a sudden I just ha d thi s flash o f my ol d boyfrien d com ing a t m e an d feelin g helples s an d no t bein g abl e t o defen d myself . M y trainer ha d m e cornere d an d I wasn' t fighting an d I starte d crying . M y trainer helpe d m e fac e m y fea r an d helpe d m e realiz e I coul d defen d myself. I t just reall y change d m y mindse t tha t I don't hav e t o b e helples s and intimidated by somebody but tha t I could defend myself. . . . [D o yo u feel tha t i f you wer e i n anothe r situation , i n which ther e wa s abuse i n a n interpersonal relationship , you r respons e woul d b e differen t now , a s a result o f you r training? ] Yes , bu t I don' t thin k i t woul d b e m y first

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response t o bus t ou t wit h a right hook . Th e boxin g ha s helped reinforc e my self-confidence t o know tha t I could leave that situation. (Boxin g stu dent) Thus th e comba t i n self-defens e classe s ca n actuall y hel p assaul t survivor s stil l struggling t o com e t o term s with th e powerlessnes s the y onc e felt . I n thi s way , there is a distinct therapeutic aspec t to some forms o f self-defense. Women , par ticularly survivors of child sexual abuse, often tak e padded attacker forms o f selfdefense fo r therapeuti c purposes . On e woma n fro m a Mode l Muggin g clas s said, After muc h discussio n wit h m y therapist , I decide d t o sig n u p fo r M M . It seeme d lik e a grea t wa y fo r m e t o lear n ver y importan t sel f defens e skills, bond wit h women , an d improv e m y sel f image. Mos t importantly , it seemed like a way to get at buried ange r toward m y stepfather wh o sex ually abused me , an d towar d m y mother , wh o playe d a major rol e i n m y abuse. During the five weeks of the program, man y ne w memories o f my abuse surfaced . An d thoug h i t wa s ver y painful , th e tremendou s suppor t I receive d from th e grou p o f women , an d bot h th e mal e an d femal e instructors wa s extremel y helpful . M y lif e ha s indee d change d an d improved. (Self-Defense and Empowerment News, 6 , no . 1 [Winter/Sprin g 1992]: 7) Self-defense trainin g ca n als o hel p survivor s o f rape an d abus e b y providin g a cathartic releas e when wome n fight throug h scene s similar to thos e the y wer e subjected t o i n th e past . A s one woma n i n Model Mugging News explained , tak ing th e multipl e assailant s cours e helpe d he r dea l wit h a real gan g rap e sh e ha d experienced twenty-fou r year s earlier , whil e i n hig h school , abou t whic h sh e had neve r spoken : It wasn' t easy . W e designe d scenario s base d o n th e assaul t an d I relive d the past. Only thi s time it was different. Muc h different . Thi s time I won . And I realized tha t I didn't deserv e it . While I may hav e use d poor judgment i n th e past , I didn't deserv e t o b e punished , hurt , raped . N o on e i n my clas s betrayed me . The y rille d m e wit h lov e an d support . I found ou t that I wa s no t th e onl y on e wit h demon s t o slay , an d I wa s gratefu l fo r the opportunit y t o suppor t m y classmate s in return . (Model Mugging News 4, no . 1 [Spring 1990] : 4) In thi s way, survivor s experienc e goin g throug h assaul t scenarios , an d winnin g this time , a s healing . Reenactin g one' s traum a i n a carefull y controlle d envi ronment whe n on e i s ready t o d o so , a s the abov e self-defense r described , ca n be a n importan t ste p towar d copin g wit h th e symptom s associate d wit h post -

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traumatic stres s disorde r (Herma n 1992) . O f course , n o studen t shoul d b e forced t o reliv e an y scen e sh e doe s not wis h to . On e self-defens e schoo l reject s reenactments acros s th e board . Precisely becaus e a significant numbe r o f self-defenser s (lik e man y wome n in th e population a t large) ar e child-sexual-abus e survivors , a Chimera instruc tor stresse s th e importanc e o f women-only environment s withou t a live moc k assailant: We d o no t us e a padde d attacker . W e believ e tha t wome n experienc e that kin d o f assaul t daily . W e practic e o n kickin g pads . W e fee l tha t it' s as useful fo r wome n t o b e i n a totally supportiv e environmen t onl y wit h women an d practice full-ou t o n pads and it' s not necessar y t o reliv e a situation. . . . We don' t us e a man i n the clas s for anythin g because we wan t the wome n t o fee l safe . It' s reall y a n intens e experienc e s o w e wan t a n environment that' s as safe a s possible so that women ca n gro w a s much a s possible. (Chimer a instructor ) Model Muggin g tend s t o pus h student s int o practicin g ever y scenario , reason ing tha t "th e rea l assailan t isn' t goin g t o g o awa y becaus e yo u hav e a col d today." But Defendin g Ourselves , Griec o explained , stresse s allowing a woman to choos e no t t o participate i n a particular exercis e i f she does not fee l like it, as a way t o practic e "honorin g women' s nos " which i n itsel f "is healing. " Of cours e no t al l women ar e affected th e sam e way by self-defens e training . Two explaine d t o m e tha t the y felt self-defens e enhance d th e assertivenes s the y already displayed : I neve r wen t throug h thi s sor t o f epiphan y experienc e tha t a lot o f peo ple see m to , like , " O h m y Go d thi s clas s opene d u p al l thes e doors" ; i t bleeded ove r int o al l other aspect s o f their life wher e the y wer e suddenl y assertive an d i t reall y affecte d al l o f thei r decision-makin g processes . I mean fo r m e i t wa s ver y muc h mor e compartmentalized . Thi s wa s a defense clas s tha t I took , an d thi s i s wher e I learne d tha t behavio r an d that's wher e I applie d it . I t didn't , I mea n I gues s I' m alread y mor e assertive tha n a lot o f people I know [laughs ] s o I already starte d a t a different level . "Bossy " mayb e i s anothe r wor d [fo r me] ! (Padde d attacke r course student ) I don't kno w i f it like totally affecte d me , I know lik e some o f my friend s who too k th e clas s were muc h mor e affecte d b y it than I was, in term s o f having bee n a little bi t mor e mee k befor e the y started . Bu t I was alway s kind o f loud an d pushy s o it didn' t [affec t me ] a s much. (Rap e crisi s cen ter self-defens e cours e student )

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Clearly al l women d o no t hav e th e sam e experience s o r embodie d subjec tivities, bu t noticeabl e pattern s emerg e tha t indicat e ho w self-defens e help s women develo p a different relationshi p wit h thei r bodies , th e variou s manifes tations o f female degradation , an d a culture tha t celebrate s thei r vulnerability t o abuse. Althoug h m y dat a doe s no t grou p experience s learnin g self-defens e b y "types" o f women, an d n o nationa l record s ar e availabl e t o tel l u s exactl y ho w many wome n o f specific racial/ethni c group s hav e sough t self-defens e training , some self-defens e instructor s hav e suggeste d th e specifi c challenge s commo n among wome n o f distinc t subjugate d racial/ethni c groups . O f course , wome n in an y give n racial/ethni c grou p ar e diverse , bu t nevertheles s som e instructor s have writte n abou t som e genera l pattern s the y hav e observed . One self-defens e instructo r notice d tha t Africa n America n wome n i n he r self-defense classe s were usuall y more psychologicall y prepare d t o channe l thei r fear int o ange r an d defen d themselves , an d neede d t o lear n physica l skill s mor e than th e psychologica l one s (Searle s an d Berge r 1987 , 72) . Bar t an d O'Brie n (1985) foun d tha t contemporar y blac k wome n ar e mor e likel y t o resist , an d stop, attack s tha n whit e women . Advise d b y thei r familie s t o figh t bac k whe n attacked, a resul t o f th e "stree t smarts " require d o f less-privilege d group s i n society, som e blac k wome n migh t hav e a n easie r time tha n othe r wome n mas tering th e "mental " aspect s o f self-defense . I n contrast , Nativ e America n women ofte n nee d mos t hel p wit h th e menta l aspect s o f self-defense . Ofte n feeling tha t outsider s contro l thei r destinies , Nativ e America n wome n ma y experience assaul t as yet another instanc e in a life over which the y have no con trol, makin g th e menta l self-wort h componen t o f self-defens e particularl y important (DuShane , i n Sanfor d an d Fette r 1979 , 164-65) . Chicanas, Asian American women , an d white wome n ofte n fac e bot h phys ical an d menta l challenge s learnin g self-defense . Unlik e whit e women , how ever, Chicana s ma y b e mor e likel y t o fea r tha t th e prid e an d physica l strengt h involved i n learnin g self-defens e make s the m "man-haters, " takin g the m out side thei r ow n cultura l fram e o f referenc e fro m withi n th e contex t o f racis m (Benavidez, i n ibid. , 162-63) . Asia n America n wome n mus t lear n self-defens e in th e contex t o f stereotypical Nort h America n medi a portrayal s o f themselve s as always sexuall y availabl e t o whit e men , particularl y soldiers , o r a s damsels i n distress i n Bruc e Le e films (althoug h martia l art s film s fo r Chinese-speakin g audiences ten d t o portray me n an d wome n a s equally stron g in th e martia l arts ) (Wong, i n ibid. , 156-59) . Whil e th e challenge s o f self-defense fo r wome n dif ferentially positione d withi n a racis t socia l structur e vary , self-defens e tha t stresses both physica l skill s an d a confident, entitle d attitud e clearl y benefit s al l women.

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Becoming a Gender Transgression As I hav e alread y suggested , women' s refusa l o f a statu s o f helpless , sexuall y available object s ca n b e disconcerting . T o becom e a self-defenser i s to becom e a gender transgression. Self-defenser s thu s have to conten d with a series of reactions t o thei r training , fro m bein g see n a s a "tough cookie " t o servin g as a rol e model fo r othe r women . I heard th e sam e joke fro m me n ove r an d over , tha t went somethin g lik e this : "I' d bette r watc h m y ste p aroun d yo u o r you'l l bea t me up!" Men will not be protectors in the same way, and both me n an d wome n realize this . Some wome n tol d m e tha t some me n i n thei r lives did not suppor t their involvement i n self-defense. I n th e following, boxer s explai n a mixture o f reactions: As far a s men, yo u ge t a lot o f jokes like , "watc h out , she' s going t o bea t you up " an d othe r me n it' s like , "heeeyyy!"—yo u know , it' s a turn-o n kind o f thing. Wit h th e men , a t least th e one s tha t aren' t i n an y kin d o f boxing o r martia l arts , they ten d t o humo r you—lik e "o h ho w cute , sh e can punch." [Lik e a condescending attitude?] Yes, a definite sens e of condescension. Lik e you're a little Barbie dol l in boxin g gear . Tha t seem s t o be a n instant issu e like, "wow , yo u coul d bea t m e up? " Like that' s goin g to com e up . Th e one s i n martia l art s o r boxing , the y just se e yo u a s a comrade: "Yo u box ? O h cool. " (Boxe r an d boxin g instructor ) Another boxe r concurred , fo r th e mos t part : Guys i n th e gy m ar e accepting , excep t fo r th e immature , youn g ones , which ar e no t th e one s I woul d wan t t o spen d tim e wit h anyway , i f they're lik e that . I ha d suspecte d tha t th e me n a t th e boxin g gy m migh t resent th e presenc e o f women , bu t the y actuall y see m quit e gla d tha t women ar e there. Except th e young, immatur e guy s from th e university . (Padded attacke r cours e an d boxin g student ) Most men outsid e the boxing gym, however, d o not kno w ho w t o react to her . She explained , Some o f the mal e doctor s a t work joke wit h me , an d I don't kno w ho w to react to them . Fo r instance, one pretends to square up t o me for a fight or wil l jokingly punc h me . Bu t I wan t t o b e feminine , bu t wha t i s tha t and how d o I integrate i t with m y self-defense ? I don't wan t t o be relate d to as only my self-defense skills. (Padded attacker course and boxing student ) Even i f a woman feel s lik e sh e i s stil l a ful l perso n wit h a variety o f interests , opinions, hobbies , an d s o on , afte r self-defens e training , other s ma y focu s on , and elevat e th e centralit y of , th e aspec t o f who sh e i s that make s he r deviant .

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One woma n explaine d tha t sh e has been impresse d wit h ho w nic e everyon e was i n th e "totall y man' s world " o f guns: You're i n a totally man' s world . Yo u know , everybod y i n thei r fatigue s and hat s an d gun s . . . and they'r e just s o nice , the y reall y ar e very , yo u know, sometime s they'r e a little patronizing , bu t they'r e just reall y nic e and ver y helpful . . . . [Wha t d o yo u mea n b y patronizing? ] Whe n I bought th e secon d gu n h e call s you "dear " an d he' s sor t o f "Wel l that' s OK," [tha t sh e didn' t kno w ho w t o clea n th e gun ] yo u know , I mean , patronizing i s the word bu t it' s in a nice way; it' s not a nasty patronizing ; I don' t min d that , yo u know . (Gu n student ) Thus whil e thi s studen t mad e i t clea r tha t sh e doe s no t hav e negativ e experi ences wit h th e mal e shooter s sh e ha s ru n acros s (i n fact , sh e distinguishe d he r experiences fro m thos e o f women i n "othe r profession s o r circumstance s o f th e all-male world " i n whic h "yo u hea r rea l complaints , ho w the y reall y ar e nasty"), sh e als o tol d o f a certain amoun t o f condescension tha t sh e mus t man age when interactin g with them . A t th e tim e o f our interview , thi s woman wa s about t o embar k upo n he r firs t tri p t o th e gu n clu b unescorte d b y a man , t o show a widowed frien d ho w t o shoo t he r lat e husband' s Col t .32 . Here i s what she anticipated : [The gu n instructor ] said , "Don' t com e u p her e alone, " yo u know , "Come u p her e wit h a friend," an d I though t tha t wa s interestin g an d I've hear d tha t a coupl e o f times . . . . Bu t I haven' t trie d tha t an d I wouldn't fee l comfortabl e doin g that , goin g alone. I probably coul d an d then I' d see . . . . I a m goin g t o hav e t o teac h he r o n Saturday , an d Sat urday afternoo n I gues s i s a time wher e al l the me n g o s o that'l l b e sor t of a learning experience . I'l l se e what it' s lik e an d I'l l se e i f we ru n int o any segregatio n typ e thin g o r an y problem s [laughs] , but I don' t antic ipate i t becaus e mos t o f th e me n reall y ar e prett y nic e i f yo u jus t as k them nicely , I mean , yo u know , eve n apologiz e an d say , don' t tr y an d flaunt th e fac t tha t you're , yo u know , a woman wit h a gun. (Gu n stu dent) Another gu n student , becaus e o f some "ugly " experience s a t the gu n range , came to see the assumption tha t men hav e a greater aptitude for shootin g as part of the proble m o f rape culture : Sometimes at the range I've had some pretty ugl y experiences there. I had a 1 0 mm., bi g caliber gun tha t no t man y people shoot , an d on e ma n said , "What i s a little lady like you goin g to do with a big gun like that?" Sinc e when doe s self-protectio n hav e gende r lines ? Mayb e w e wouldn' t hav e

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such a screwed u p rap e cultur e i f women coul d tak e car e o f themselves . (Gun student ) That sam e studen t wa s heartene d whe n sh e fel t encourage d b y a ma n a t th e range. She encountered hi m one day after takin g a combat class , which sh e too k after Paxto n Quigley' s firearms cours e fo r women , sh e said , "pu t a bug i n m e " for mor e training : After m y second , hardes t comba t class , I remember puttin g mysel f in th e car; i t wa s a rainy day , an d som e gentleman— I wa s th e onl y girl—cam e up t o me an d said, "Yo u di d extremely well out ther e today . Keep u p th e good work. " An d I almost ha d t o chok e bac k from crying . I' m shootin g as well a s these guys . I f for an y reaso n I was i n a threatening situation , I could tak e car e o f myself. You fee l kin d o f scared and good abou t your self. Like a mixed emotion . (Gu n student ) The followin g self-defense r sai d that she fears being isolated and alienated b y men wh o migh t label her a lesbian as a result o f her participation i n self-defense . This dread o f isolation i s especially grea t du e t o he r prior histor y o f being over weight an d havin g "th e issue s surrounding it, " whic h fo r he r include d no t dat ing a t all: I hesitat e tellin g peopl e tha t I box—an d I' m embarrasse d t o eve n sa y this—because I' m afrai d I'l l be labeled a lesbian. I t already happens to me . And I have nothin g agains t gays ; it is just tha t I am no t ga y and I' m afrai d I'll ge t know n a s o r labele d a lesbia n an d the n me n wil l dislik e me . (Padded attacke r cours e an d boxin g student ) This nex t student , wh o identifie d a s gay, perhap s ha s les s reaso n t o fea r alien ation from men . Sh e explaine d tha t he r involvemen t i n karat e ha s mad e he r somewhat o f a role model : [Outside karate ] the y wer e quit e impressed . Peopl e hav e thi s thin g i n their mind s an d ask , ar e yo u a black bel t yet ? . . . It' s a little mysteriou s and also powerful. Bot h m y sister s want t o be abl e to d o this . (Karat e stu dent) A gu n studen t explaine d ho w peopl e reac t t o her : A little bit amazed. I' m no t a little, petite girl. I've neve r been a quiet, sh y person. I'v e alway s bee n kin d o f loud an d obnoxious . Bu t peopl e wer e amazed tha t tha t wa s part o f me. "D o yo u hunt? " "Ar e you goin g t o kil l animals?" I' d say , " N o , I' m jus t int o th e spor t o f it. " Peopl e wer e shocked. (Gu n student )

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Although tha t gu n student' s femal e friend s wer e influenced , eve n i f initially surprised, b y he r involvement , som e self-defenser s see m t o hav e a sens e tha t women, thos e agains t violence , migh t reac t negativel y t o thei r activities . Fo r example, I've notice d tha t ther e seem s t o b e a n assumptio n tha t you'r e a violen t person, an d that' s bothersome . An d I don' t fee l lik e tha t a t all . I mea n I enjoy [boxing ] a s a sport , an d I' m no t a violen t person . The y thin k o f boxing a s a violent sport , an d I guess fro m a n outsider' s poin t o f view i t is, but t o me it' s just a sport. And I think I could actuall y be healthier tha n people wh o don' t d o this . I vent; I get ou t m y ange r an d frustrations i n a healthy way. I' m no t abou t t o blow, becaus e I' m constantl y processing it . Of cours e there' s mor e tha n on e wa y t o proces s things . (Boxe r an d box ing instructor ) The self-defenser s sometime s spea k t o a kin d o f skeptica l feminis t audienc e when the y discus s ho w the y thin k the y ar e perceived . Thi s instructor' s state ment frame s he r view s o f self-defens e a s a n issu e o f citizenship , an d i n term s popular amon g feminist s wh o valu e women' s nurturin g roles : "There' s noth ing morally objectionabl e abou t defendin g myself . I' m a good citize n fo r doin g so. Thi s i s connecte d wit h nurturanc e i n a wa y tha t feminist s wh o ar e con cerned wit h nurturanc e ignore . It' s anothe r par t o f ou r huma n potential " (Helen Grieco , padde d attacke r cours e instructor) .

Conclusion Self-defense make s clear that gender reality is a matter of performance. I learned in m y observation s o f self-defens e classe s tha t women' s helples s bodil y com portment i n par t come s fro m actua l experience s an d fear s o f bein g attacked . Women d o no t merely , ove r time , develo p a n aestheti c preferenc e fo r a femi nine demeanor ; w e ar e no t simpl y seduce d int o it . I t i s forced upo n us ; we ar e taught tha t w e wil l no t live , eat , o r b e love d withou t it . W e ar e punishe d fo r challenging it . Eve n i f we "accidentally " hav e th e wron g physica l demeanor , there ar e costs . Gender is thus constructed throug h corporea l acts . A feminine comportmen t serves t o materializ e th e bod y a s a female body , a gendered body . O u r bodie s are th e sign s o f our historicall y an d culturall y delimite d identificator y possibili ties. O f course , sexua l assaul t itsel f (an d consensua l heterosexua l sex , fo r tha t matter) i s such a corporeal ac t whic h ca n mak e on e "fee l lik e a man" o r "fee l

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like a woman." Butle r (1990 , 139 ) states: "The body is not a 'being,' but a variable boundary, a surface whos e permeabilit y i s politically regulated , a signifyin g practice withi n a cultural field o f gender hierarch y an d compulsory heterosex uality." In a n actual assaul t situation , whe n th e self-defenser confound s th e script of helpless female victim and unstoppable male attacker, she is refusing th e sex class status that acts of rape and woman abus e impose. This is the political—and fem inist—importance o f refusing sexua l assault. Self-defens e enable s us to see gender ideology o r power operatin g not just at the level of ideas, social interaction , and relationship s (a s though th e effects o f ideology ar e limited t o one' s beliefs , roles, or psychology) bu t at the level of the body a s well. The body-self is transformed throug h rehearsal s o f aggression, whic h solidif y a new embodied ideal , not becaus e a woma n become s consciou s o f he r politica l situatio n an d the n changes her behavior. Thi s is the political, and feminist, importanc e o f learning self-defense, beyon d it s ability t o enforc e women' s refusa l o f men's attacks . When wome n perfor m a decidedl y unfeminin e script , a s i n self-defens e classes, the y ar e challenging gende r reality . Whe n wome n lear n t o ge t mean , they realiz e tha t feminin e nicenes s i s a historical effect , no t a natural give n o f womanhood. Feminist s hav e lon g bee n contestin g th e idea tha t gende r differ ences ar e natural. Wha t i s revealed s o clearly i n self-defens e classe s is the leve l at which gende r is incorporated int o th e body. Eve n som e feminist s hav e con sidered th e male bod y naturall y suitabl e fo r raping th e violable femal e body . Some women migh t thin k tha t self-defense make s them unnaturally capable , hence leavin g gende r undeconstructed . Bu t evidenc e agains t thi s i s tha t self defensers sa y things like , "I' m becoming mor e myself, " and "You can't reall y be a woma n unles s yo u hav e tha t strength. " Thi s suggest s t o m e tha t self defensers ar e trying to naturalize fighting, t o argue tha t ther e i s nothing unnat ural about thei r abilities. By the same token, though , I do not see women's cul tivation o f aggression a s an essentialist unfolding—as thoug h th e possibilities o r fighter identitie s wer e ther e an d simply represse d du e to female socializatio n ( a narrative tha t Jackso n [1993 , 125 ] suggest s characterize s self-defens e instruc tion). Self-defens e instructor s d o no t releas e a mor e real , albei t dormant , instinct. The y impos e a ne w behavior , muc h a s women' s ol d behavior , fo r instance a n inability t o kick hard , wa s also at some poin t culturall y imposed . Men an d women lear n to inhabit thei r bodies in a gendered politica l system , embodying th e etho s o f rape culture . Ye t self-defens e enable s u s "t o imagin e the femal e bod y a s subject t o change , a s a potential objec t o f fear an d agent o f violence" (Marcu s 1992 , 400). The rapist and his victim ar e not in some prima l predator-prey relationship ; thos e ar e precisely th e term s o f the even t tha t th e

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act of self-defense rejects . The embodie d etho s o f rape cultur e i s radically trans formed i n self-defens e instructio n no t onl y becaus e wome n consciousl y adop t and mak e habi t ne w gesture s an d voices , bu t becaus e thei r live s chang e afte r their involvement . The y expand ; the y ar e les s afraid o f men; the y ar e read y t o claim ne w territory . It i s worth emphasizin g tha t whil e wome n ar e gla d the y lear n self-defense , they stil l wish the y di d no t hav e to . Fo r som e women , i t seeme d to o concilia tory t o lear n t o us e violence , give n tha t i t seem s lik e a "mal e mode " o f inter action an d becaus e i t shoul d b e men' s responsibilit y t o sto p assaultin g women : I remembe r bein g reall y pisse d like , wh y th e hel l shoul d w e hav e t o d o this? You know , Go d dam n it , you guy s don't eve n ge t it. . . . It concern s just ho w vulnerabl e w e ar e systematically . Wh y shoul d we ? Wh y i s tha t the case ? But the n th e cours e goes , don' t just as k why, le t m e teac h yo u some thing s tha t ar e realisti c an d yo u ca n apply . So , yeah , I wa s lik e a warrior fo r women , yo u know ? (Padde d attacke r cours e student ) I thin k a world withou t gun s i s th e idea l world , absolutely . I f I ha d m y druthers I' d hav e ever y weapo n sucke d int o a gian t vacuu m an d destroyed, yo u know , I mean that' s o f course, yo u know , th e wa y I feel . . . . I mean thes e kid s al l killing eac h othe r an d al l the destructio n i s ter rible. Bu t i n th e worl d w e liv e in , yo u know , an d sinc e th e gun s ar e s o widespread, we'v e go t t o dea l wit h th e worl d we'r e in . (Gu n student ) I'm stil l one o f those people wh o says , you know , th e world shouldn' t b e like this , an d w e shouldn' t hav e t o kno w ho w t o d o this . Just becaus e men us e violence , there' s n o reaso n w e shoul d us e violenc e becaus e th e solution i s for me n no t t o b e violen t i n th e first place . . . . Why i s it m y responsibility t o lear n ho w t o defen d mysel f from som e asshole ? Should n't i t b e thei r responsibilit y no t t o attac k me ? (Rap e crisi s cente r self defense cours e student ) A forme r self-defens e instructo r tol d m e tha t th e frictio n ove r women' s "becoming lik e men " force d he r t o giv e u p teaching : That's wh y I stoppe d doin g i t [teachin g self-defense] . Becaus e I' m no t really a political person. Peopl e assume d I was and ha d a position o n this . I don't hav e al l the informatio n an d I don't hav e stron g opinions . I don' t think wome n can become lik e men . I' m al l fo r wome n fighting back . I just hav e thi s fait h o r thi s trus t tha t a woman i s not goin g t o g o ou t an d maliciously hur t someon e unles s sh e ha s been beate n down . . . . I' m thi s pro-peacenik bu t I' m goin g t o sto p th e violenc e befor e i t come s t o me . (Rape crisi s cente r self-defens e cours e instructor )

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Of cours e w e al l want t o liv e i n a world i n whic h dispute s ar e resolve d with out violence , an d i n whic h violenc e doe s no t enabl e th e dominatio n o f on e over another . Wit h a fear o f immediate threats , what i s a principled feminis t t o do? I hav e argue d tha t self-defens e embodie s a se t o f feminis t ethic s abou t women's entitlemen t t o mak e thei r ow n sexua l choice s an d challenge s th e nat uralized associatio n betwee n masculinit y an d violence . Bu t despit e it s radica l potential to challenge rape culture, self-defense an d feminist politic s remain dis tant. I asked self-defense student s i f they sa w their practices a s connected t o th e women's movemen t i n an y ways , usuall y onl y t o fac e blan k stares , fumblin g comments lik e "wel l yea h sure, " o r intimidate d confession s suc h a s "m y con sciousness is not totall y raised. " Th e connectio n betwee n self-defens e an d fem inism was commonly frame d i n terms o f women's gettin g to d o mor e thing s o r feeling mor e empowered . Onl y on e studen t frame d he r involvemen t wit h self defense a s a way o f enactin g feminism . Sh e identifie d hersel f a s a feminist an d explained: All of the advances—sexual freedoms, birt h control—mea n nothin g if we cannot protec t ou r ow n bodies . I f I opene d m y mout h to o much , I ge t punished. Punishmen t i s bein g beate n o r raped . S o al l th e othe r gain s women ca n mak e ar e smoke . S o m y commitmen t t o feminis m an d t o other wome n i s t o self-defense . It' s lik e feminis m o n th e physica l level . (Padded attacke r cours e student ) Although severa l self-defense instructor s I met se e themselves i n th e contex t of th e women' s movemen t an d identif y themselve s a s feminists , some — whether o r not the y conside r themselves feminists—feel frustrate d wit h o r sim ply distan t fro m feminis m proper . T o them , th e women' s movemen t i s to o hoity-toity t o embrac e th e wor k o f self-defense. Fo r example , i n he r boo k o n unarmed self-defense techniques , Attitude: Commonsense Defense forWomen, Lisa Sliwa (1986 , 30 ) says, The women' s movemen t exist s mostl y i n th e mind s o f som e Eas t Coas t ivory-tower intellectual s whos e mai n functio n i s t o giv e on e anothe r awards every year at lavish banquets. They ar e out o f touch with th e mos t urgent problem confrontin g girl s and women today : how t o deal with th e increasing violenc e committe d agains t women . The followin g martia l artis t contraste d self-defens e trainin g wit h socia l ser vices "tha t just patc h u p th e damag e o f violence agains t wome n afte r it' s bee n done (e.g. , rape crisi s centers and battered women's shelters). " She explaine d i n her dojo' s newsletter :

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I see teaching self-defense . . . a s a very concrete way of teaching/ encouraging resistance , a place t o begi n discussion s o f form s o f oppressio n an d possibilities fo r resistance , an d s o on . I n thi s way , I don' t thin k o f wha t we d o a s a socia l servic e (althoug h I hav e n o proble m wit h presentin g ourselves a s a socia l servic e t o ge t grants—a s lon g a s ther e aren' t bi g strings attached) . Socia l service s ar e necessar y t o preserv e th e statu s quo . Providing service s tha t enabl e peopl e t o surviv e o r eve n escap e violenc e and oppressio n i s a very differen t thin g from stirrin g up th e kin d o f con sciousness an d actio n tha t lead s peopl e t o fight agains t oppression , an d I hope w e ar e doin g th e latter . . . . What w e ar e doin g i s not a service; i t is a (at least potentially) ver y disruptive for m o f education. (The Shuri-Spiral News, January 1993 ) The nee d t o d o somethin g t o preven t violence , indee d t o se e violenc e a s preventable, involve s a more radica l outloo k tha n tha t whic h seem s t o character ize feminis t crisi s center s fo r victimize d women . Suc h service s ma y b e neces sary, but self-defenser s clai m that the y ar e not enough—an d ma y eve n preserv e the statu s qu o b y confirmin g th e associatio n o f me n wit h unstoppabl e aggres sion and women wit h inescapabl e victimhood. I n much th e same spirit, the gu n instructor Ly n Bates told m e tha t lookin g t o long-ter m solution s shoul d no t b e the onl y feminis t strateg y t o en d violenc e agains t women : The women' s movemen t i s doin g wome n a tremendou s disservic e b y overlooking th e fac t tha t ther e ar e a number o f ways t o protec t yourself . [How ar e they overlookin g thi s fact, specifically? ] The y ten d t o be o n th e side of looking to long-term solutions—what ca n we d o to society to kee p people from wantin g t o commi t violence ? I lik e t o giv e th e analog y t o AIDS: th e short-ter m solutio n i s sex educatio n an d condoms ; th e long term solutio n i s researc h t o find treatmen t o r a cure . N o san e perso n would eve r argu e tha t al l th e egg s shoul d g o int o on e basket . Th e sam e thing i s true o f violence an d crime . . . . There ar e peopl e wh o ar e bein g attacked right now and they need tools and training right now t o deal with that situation . Becaus e the y can' t wai t fo r th e educationa l refor m an d th e welfare refor m an d al l th e othe r reform s t o chang e th e situation . Th e problems I have wit h tha t Ms. magazin e articl e [May/Jun e 1994 ] is that i t says to women , there' s nothin g yo u ca n d o i n th e shor t run . I n th e shor t run there' s somethin g wron g wit h you , immora l an d dangerou s an d ba d if you lear n t o us e a gun, an d tha t simpl y i s not true . Bu t a n awfu l lo t o f women bu y int o tha t becaus e the y hea r i t from source s tha t the y respect . Here feminis m i s s o antiviolence , o r a t leas t antigun , tha t i t frighten s som e women awa y from trainin g i n self-defense .

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Paxton Quigle y make s clea r tha t feminist s agains t gun s just don' t ge t it : I thin k ther e shoul d b e certainl y mor e philosophica l discussion s amon g feminists, especiall y Easter n feminist s [feminist s o n th e Eas t Coas t o f th e United States] , about th e use of handguns. Fo r some reason, Eastern fem inists ten d t o b e antigun , an d I thin k a lot o f that ha s t o d o wit h th e fac t that the y haven' t bee n aroun d guns , an d the y don' t understan d wha t a gun ca n do to a woman psychologically . I think tha t they're missing a link in understandin g tota l feminism . As for th e feminist s wh o thin k tha t i t is Quigley wh o i s missing a feminist link , she said , I don' t thin k thos e wome n who'v e criticize d m e reall y hav e an y under standing o f wha t I tr y t o sa y an d do . Ther e ar e a lo t o f antihandgu n women tha t I'v e aske d t o b e i n m y clas s and no t eve n pa y t o d o it . No t one o f them ha s take n m y class . Perhaps the y don' t wan t t o know , per haps they'r e fearfu l tha t I migh t eve n chang e them . I don' t min d bein g criticized, bu t a t least take my semina r s o that you ca n com e fro m a place of knowledge rathe r tha n a place o f hearsay o r assumption . Thus i t seems less that self-defensers dismis s feminism tha n tha t feminists dis regard self-defense . Th e nex t chapte r present s th e uneasines s feminist s migh t have abou t women' s self-defense , uneasines s tha t I sugges t i s based o n a set o f assumptions abou t violenc e an d th e body . I indicat e som e way s tha t women' s increasing engagemen t wit h self-defens e ca n prompt feminist s t o refigur e thos e central assumption s i n feminis t philosoph y an d politic s an d embrac e self defense a s an importan t feminis t project .

4 Changing Ou r Mind s abou t Our Bodie s What Can Feminism Learn from Self-Defense?

Women's experience s i n self-defens e course s sho w tha t bodie s ar e inscribed in particular ways that perpetuate gende r inequality. Th e ne w "mean " bodies tha t self-defenser s develo p revea l tha t reinscriptio n i s possible . Gros z (1994, xiii ) insist s tha t bodie s ca n b e "live d an d represente d i n quit e differen t terms, term s tha t ma y gran t wome n th e capacit y fo r independenc e an d auton omy, whic h thu s fa r hav e bee n attribute d onl y t o men. " Changin g th e bod y incorporates an d projects ne w knowledge abou t women an d a new sense of self. Social identit y canno t b e distinguishe d fro m th e live d body ; th e live d bod y i s how self-identit y i s actualized . If one's self-imag e canno t b e distinguishe d from th e livin g o f this body a s a whole, the n i t should no t b e surprisin g i f changes i n th e bod y effec t change s i n the structur e an d fabri c o f the sel f (Diprose 1994 , 117) . The discipline d reorga nization o f one' s response s t o aggressiv e me n break s throug h a habi t o f femi nine manner s i n whic h th e femal e bod y perpetuall y repeat s a repertoir e o f socially desirable , feminin e acts . Just a s the bod y an d henc e th e sel f can chang e through a n injury , disease , o r pregnanc y (ibid.) , self-defensers , i n formin g ne w bodily habits , chang e wha t i t mean s t o b e a woman . I anticipate tha t some migh t b e skeptica l o f the feminis t potentia l o f a movement i n which womanhoo d stil l seems so important, i n which shootin g is "fun " and "sexy, " i n whic h physica l comba t i s pleasurable , an d i n whic h wome n embrace rathe r than forgo th e "manly " practices feminists hav e criticized. Fem inists have looke d criticall y a t women's engagemen t wit h popula r culture , par ticularly whe n som e corporatio n stand s t o profi t fro m it , whe n i t i s laude d a s good fo r women , an d whe n i t i s celebrated a s empowering b y man y wh o lac k feminist commitments . Thi s i s the strengt h o f feminist analyse s that challenged , for instance , claim s tha t th e sexua l revolutio n benefite d wome n (e.g. , Jeffrey s 1990). S o i t i s understandabl e an d necessar y tha t feminis t critic s d o no t easil y

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accept ne w cultura l trend s tha t purpor t t o liberat e women . A s muc h a s w e should take these feminist critic s seriously, we mus t also take seriously the man y women whos e pleasure s see m t o H e in th e popula r activit y o f self-defense . My purpose her e is to suggest a critical and feminist wa y of experiencing an d enjoying women' s self-defense . I arrived a t this analysis not onl y by takin g selfdefense an d talkin g to othe r participants but als o through m y position a s a fem inist theoretica l interpreter . A s I propose a way o f understanding self-defense , I consider wha t feminis m ca n lear n fro m self-defens e culture . Thi s chapte r pre sents som e feminis t hesitation s abou t women' s cultivatio n o f aggression, iden tifies th e politica l an d philosophica l legacie s behin d thos e hesitations , an d sug gests som e way s i n whic h feminist s migh t reconside r thos e philosophica l assumptions an d resultan t scruples . The discours e o f gender—feminis t o r not—i s par t o f th e ongoin g struggl e to establis h an ordering o f human bodie s and affairs . Appealin g to th e agenc y o f women involve s an attempt t o become part of the set of voices and interests try ing t o shap e th e syste m o f identity, normativ e order , an d power . Fo r instance , if women sa y that "it' s sexy " t o shoo t a gun, the n i t coul d be , a s Lorber (1993 , 574, followin g Manga n an d Par k 1987 ) cynicall y assume s i n th e contex t o f women's sports , tha t wome n manag e th e "statu s dilemma " o f engagin g i n unfeminine activitie s by redefining th e activity or its result as feminine o r w o m anly. However , I think w e migh t sa y that wome n ar e no t s o much devote d t o appearing womanl y a s the y ar e t o allowin g greate r roo m fo r wha t ca n coun t culturally a s "womanly. " Rathe r tha n naivel y contradictin g themselves , the y are suggesting that women ca n be simultaneously nurturin g and aggressive, sexy and respectable . Whe n a woma n say s tha t self-defens e make s he r "really " a woman, mor e o f a woman , o r sexier , wha t doe s tha t tel l u s abou t gendere d identities? Wha t ar e th e Utopia n aspect s o f this notio n o f womanhood ? If feminism's focu s o n th e bod y le d i n th e 1970 s to a n intense antirap e cam paign, i t als o le d t o th e offerin g o f som e self-defens e course s fo r wome n a s a feminist practice . But , a s Shannon Jackson (1993 , i n ) notes , sinc e the n feminists hav e questione d som e o f th e assumption s whic h fuele d thei r initial ac t o f resistance , forcin g the m t o examin e th e exten t t o whic h racism, classism , capitalism , an d homophobi a structure d thei r rhetori c and goal s an d inadvertentl y perpetuate d patriarcha l values . Thi s proces s of self-examinatio n ha s necessaril y disrupte d effort s t o forg e unambigu ous an d decisiv e prescription s fo r politica l action . Although I shar e thi s concer n t o connec t gende r oppressio n wit h othe r form s of oppression, an d t o be awar e o f contradictory location s within a power struc -

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 13 9 ture, I think tha t abandonin g a n emphasis o n self-defense withi n feminis t poli tics is not merely grounded in the innocent desir e to avoid perpetuating oppres sion an d actually cause s mor e har m tha n i t avoids , particularl y whe n i t come s to perpetuatin g heterosexis t an d racist definition s o f womanhood . T w o majo r assumptions , manifeste d i n several differen t form s o f skepticism about women' s aggression , particularl y women' s arme d self-defense , preven t feminists from embracin g self-defens e a s a centra l anti-sexua l assaul t strategy : the assumptio n tha t an y form o f violence i s "masculinist " an d therefor e doe s not genuinel y transfor m society ; and the assumption tha t transforming th e body cannot lea d t o feminis t transformation , a t the individual muc h les s the societa l level. Self-defens e present s a compellin g cas e fo r feminist s t o questio n thes e assumptions. Two commentator s (Jackso n 1993 ; Lentz 1993 ) actually reject thos e assump tions bu t remai n skeptica l o f women' s self-defens e o n th e ground s tha t self defense cultur e hold s thos e ver y beliefs . I conten d tha t self-defens e i s no t i n danger o f perpetuating th e philosophical an d political problem s associate d wit h either th e assumptio n tha t al l violenc e i s masculinis t o r th e assumptio n tha t body projects canno t lead to feminist transformation . Thi s is not to say that self defense i s perfect. I suggest tha t overcomin g th e problems i n feminis m an d in self-defense require s a more explici t merge r o f the tw o and, ultimately, a philosophy o f the ethica l significanc e o f women's self-defense .

Gun Use and Gun Control As "Women's Issues )f A goo d dea l of the intensit y o f feeling abou t women' s self-defens e i s linked t o concerns abou t arme d violenc e specifically . Thi s ma y be in part becaus e man y underestimate th e damage traine d wome n ca n do without firearms. Still , posi tioned a s the most "male, " th e most deadly , an d the most tabo o fo r women , guns ar e the most controversia l for m o f self-defense. Gun s ar e "male," i n thi s logic, an d therefore oppressive ; henc e resistanc e t o the m shoul d b e "female. " If guns are sold t o women, i t could onl y be to corrupt wome n wit h masculin ity o r a "male " politica l agenda , makin g th e worl d a more violen t an d mor e sexist place . Self-defens e cultur e prove s som e o f thos e anxietie s t o b e il l founded an d prompts a reevaluation o f the se t of assumptions informin g thos e fears. The ide a tha t gun s represen t mal e cultur e an d male violence agains t wome n makes many cynica l abou t th e National Rifl e Associatio n (NRA ) even whe n i t appears t o b e attemptin g t o d o wome n som e good . Fo r example , Kare n

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Lehrman, i n The New Republic (1992, 45) , writes : "Al l thi s women' s li b stuff , though, can' t obscur e th e gu n lobby' s rea l agenda—exploitin g women' s fear s of rape. And it' s thi s rhetoric, ironically , that' s mos t i n syn c with today' s femi nists." Accordin g t o antigu n folks , wome n ar e bein g "seduce d b y th e NRA' s ads" (Rose n 1993 , 466) an d "targete d b y a n industr y tha t want s u s t o join th e vigilante crowd " (ibid. , 464) . Wome n wh o shoo t ar e construe d a s pawn s o f men—as thoug h wome n wh o disagre e wit h certai n feminist s ha d simpl y become naivel y engrosse d i n a plot agains t themselves . But it' s a dirty tric k t o vie w th e wome n wh o interpre t th e Secon d Amend ment i n way s simila r t o o r compatibl e wit h Women and Guns o r th e N R A a s victims o f patriarchal double-dealing . I n thi s way , feminis t opponent s o f gun s make their opposition a gende r issue—a s i f wome n wh o us e gun s wer e no t thinking fo r themselves . Lehrma n (1992 , 45) quote s th e N R A bookle t "I t Ca n Happen t o You " a s it suggests , "Ther e i s no wa y o f telling a criminal predato r by th e wa y h e looks . . . . He migh t b e a potential suitor . H e migh t wor k i n a nearby office. " Lehrma n (ibid. ) scold s gu n manufacturer s fo r usin g "feminis t code words " a s a "marketin g strategy. " Sh e i s s o committe d t o th e ide a tha t guns coul d no t b e i n women' s interest s tha t th e fac t tha t "th e anti-dat e rap e crowd couldn' t hav e sai d i t an y better " (ibid. ) i s only furthe r evidenc e fo r he r that th e N R A i s manipulating women . Critics assum e tha t i f the N R A increase s it s female membership , the y mus t be exploitin g women t o mak e money . Bu t tha t th e N R A ha s never positione d itself a s a feminis t organizatio n doe s no t mea n tha t feminist s canno t mak e i t more accountabl e t o wome n b y educatin g it s members . Fo r instance , i f th e average mal e N R A membe r think s hi s wif e o r daughte r wil l us e he r gu n t o shoot stranger s the n h e coul d b e i n fo r a surprise. Claim s tha t wome n ar e tak ing u p arm s because the y hav e bough t int o N R A rhetori c obscur e th e capaci ties of women t o reinterpret specifi c orthodoxies . Moreover, suc h claims ignore the fac t tha t gun s ar e on e par t o f a whole hos t o f self-defense activitie s increas ingly popular amon g women . We canno t blam e o r credi t N R A advertisement s fo r th e entir e self-defens e movement. Wome n ar e increasingl y seekin g self-defens e i n man y nonletha l forms a s well . Thes e program s als o gea r themselve s t o wome n an d wan t t o increase thei r enrollment . Eve n i f the interest s o f the N R A an d th e anti-sexua l assault movemen t d o no t converge , an d eve n i f th e N R A i s manipulatin g women, th e en d resul t ma y wor k t o women' s benefit . Eve n i f th e tool s ar e questionable, even if the ideologies are not th e same, women migh t tak e advan tage o f the N R A t o achiev e thei r ends . Women migh t als o have a distinct con tribution t o mak e t o firearms culture . Fo r instance , i n 198 8 Mario n Hammer ,

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 14 1 now N R A president , create d Eddi e Eagle , th e award-winnin g gu n safet y pro gram fo r children . Organized feminis m ha s turne d gu n contro l int o a women's issu e i n par t a s a respons e t o th e NRA' s connectio n o f women an d firearms. I n th e 1990 s th e N R A bega n a n extensiv e advertisin g campaig n i n women' s magazine s suggest ing tha t wome n coul d "choos e t o refus e t o b e a victim." The y trie d i n 1988 , but th e women' s magazine s refuse d t o ru n th e ad s (Maine s 1992) . A s soo n a s the N R A frame d self-defensiv e pisto l packin g a s a women's issue , Adelle Sim mons o f th e John D . an d Catherin e T . MacArthu r Foundatio n an d Marjori e Benton contacte d Bett y Frieda n wit h thei r ide a t o identif y gu n contro l a s a women's issu e of the 1990 s (Rosen 1993 , 464). These women organize d agains t "random gu n violence " an d "drive-b y shootings " (ibid.) , not rap e an d woma n battering. For arme d self-defens e culture , however , opposin g rando m gu n violenc e and supportin g women' s arme d self-defens e ar e no t incompatibl e projects . Quigley (1989 ) make s clea r tha t gun s shoul d b e use d onl y b y adult s wh o us e them safel y an d lawfully . He r answe r t o accidenta l shooting s i s careful deliber ation abou t whethe r o r no t t o ow n a firearm, discussio n wit h one' s childre n about them , safe-handlin g courses , an d practic e sessions . Th e intens e fea r o f guns s o commo n amon g Nort h America n wome n make s the m mor e likel y t o take a course t o lear n t o handl e the m properly . Me n migh t hav e a false confi dence abou t ho w t o us e and handl e firearms safely . Thi s i s not t o sa y that ever y female gu n owne r i s careful. Bu t gu n instructor s believ e tha t a n organize d cul ture o f shootin g institutionalize s professiona l safe-handlin g instructio n an d activities fo r continue d practic e shooting , makin g accident s les s likely t o occur . For thos e wh o ar e worrie d tha t wome n wil l acquir e a gun an d en d u p o n th e wrong en d o f it , th e women' s arme d self-defens e movemen t encourage s th e training necessar y t o preven t tha t circumstance . In fact , female s fo r firearms se e thos e kind s o f worry a s a form o f paternal ism, since , a s gun instructo r Ly n Bate s pu t it , "th e numbe r o f cases [o f wome n using gun s irresponsibly ] ar e infinitesima l an d shrinkin g wit h prope r training. " Still, som e ma y fea r tha t firearms fo r self-protectio n wil l injur e children , an d hence se e women' s advocac y o f arme d self-defens e a s irresponsible—perhap s particularly so , sinc e mother s ar e stil l hel d mor e responsibl e tha n father s fo r their children' s welfare . Self-defenser s wh o us e weapon s not e th e importanc e of teachin g wome n saf e way s t o stor e gun s i n thei r homes . Also , the y migh t point ou t tha t th e fata l firearms acciden t rat e pe r capit a maintaine d a n all-tim e low from 198 6 to 1993 , 0.6 for ever y 100,00 0 people in the United State s (1,52 1 occurrences). Thi s i s an 8 2 percent decreas e sinc e 1904 , when th e rat e wa s a n

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all-time hig h o f 3. 4 (Nationa l Safet y Counci l 1995 , 44-45). * Th e Nationa l Safety Counci l (1995 , 809 ) estimate s tha t i n 199 4 amon g childre n unde r five specifically, th e accidenta l death s from firearms numbere d 50 . Th e accidenta l deaths from liqui d o r soli d poison 2 numbere d 30 , from fires 700 , from drown ing 600 , an d from chokin g 18 0 (ibid. , 8-9)—som e o f th e ver y danger s from which w e trus t wome n t o protec t thei r children . Amon g al l U.S . childre n under ag e fifteen i n 1994 , the Nationa l Safet y Counci l estimate s tha t th e num ber o f accidental death s from firearms wa s 200 , from liqui d o r soli d poiso n 40 , from fires 1,000 , from drownin g 1,000 , and from chokin g 22 0 (ibid.) . But feminist s fo r gu n contro l ofte n cit e th e stud y tha t appeare d i n th e New England Journal of Medicine to reinforc e thei r poin t tha t gun s ar e use d mor e i n random accident s tha n fo r self-defense . Th e stud y conclude d tha t gun s kep t i n homes i n King County , Washington , wer e involve d i n th e deat h o f househol d members eightee n time s mor e ofte n tha n i n th e deat h o f strangers (Kellerma n and Reay 1986) . This study unwittingly replicate d an already seriously criticize d study whic h mad e simila r conclusion s i n 197 5 (Klec k 1991 , 127-29) . Th e pri mary proble m wit h bot h studies , whic h shoul d b e obviou s t o feminist s wh o have attempte d t o dismantl e th e myt h o f the strange r assailant , i s that the y pre sume tha t th e killin g o f a member o f th e househol d mus t b e accidenta l rathe r than self-defensive . Women' s self-defensiv e shooting s o f their abuser s coul d b e counted a s evidenc e o f th e beneficia l effect s o f gu n ownership . Eve n i f th e numbers coul d b e determine d accurately , a greate r numbe r o f accidenta l (o r home) gu n death s tha n self-defensiv e (o r stranger ) gu n death s canno t indicat e that gun s ar e necessaril y use d les s ofte n i n self-defense . Thi s i s because no t al l self-defensive gu n use s result i n deat h o r eve n shooting . Assailant s wounded b y gunshots surviv e 8 5 percent o f the tim e (ibid. , 116 ) an d th e numbe r o f attack s that a gun stop s without eve r being fired i s a significant portion : unde r 4 0 per cent o f defensive gu n use s actuall y involv e th e defender' s shootin g (ibid. , 123 24; Rand 1994) . Though man y clai m tha t i t i s too eas y for a U.S. citize n t o ge t a gun, ther e are those who sa y that wome n hav e a relatively har d tim e gettin g gun s for self protection an d th e lega l permit s t o carr y the m whe n thei r live s hav e bee n threatened. On e instructo r tol d m e abou t a woma n wh o wen t t o th e polic e department o f a majo r cit y t o ge t a firearms licens e an d wa s told , "W e don' t give permit s t o broad s here. " Whe n forme r edito r o f Women and Guns Sonn y Jones se t ou t t o purchas e a gun som e year s ago , th e ma n runnin g th e gu n sho p told her , "Lady , yo u don' t nee d a gun . Wha t yo u nee d i s a man " (quote d i n Draper 1993 , 302). Jones also knows tha t salesmen ofte n tr y to sel l women a .22 or .2 5 calibe r gun : "They'r e calle d mous e guns . A woma n doesn' t wan t a gu n

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 14 3 that looks cute . She wants a gun that looks like a gun" (quoted i n Maines 1992, 22). Also , th e "cooling off ' perio d require d i n some state s before th e purchas e of a firearm ca n be a severe disadvantag e to , say, a woman who' s bein g stalke d by a violent forme r partne r i n violation o f his restrainin g order . Thi s i s not t o say that th e regulation o f firearms i s necessarily bad, but that th e dangerous sit uations i n whic h wome n migh t find themselve s ar e no t alway s th e resul t o f someone's quic k an d easy acces s to a firearm. O f cours e gun s d o no t provid e automati c securit y agains t vulnerability . Owning a gun takes a lot of work, expense , an d time. An d guns ar e only use ful agains t certai n type s o f assault, primaril y thos e i n a woman's ow n home or , in states that allow citizens to carry concealed weapons, in parking lots and other such places . Further , the y ar e useful onl y i n states tha t permi t th e use of letha l force t o stop an assailant from rapin g or in cases where th e woman believe s tha t the assailan t migh t als o attempt t o kill her. They d o not usually protect wome n from offic e assault , from roadsid e assault , from dat e rape , an d so on. This i s all the mor e reaso n femal e shooter s shoul d b e par t o f a n overal l women' s self defense movement . Alienatin g armed wome n wil l not encourage wide-rangin g self-defense strategies . Th e gun instructors I spoke wit h advocat e eclecti c self defense tactics . A gun is not the only metho d o f self-defense, bu t simply part o f an overal l personal protection strategy . I f a gun is a woman's first choic e o f selfdefense instruction , fo r whatever reason , she is likely to develop a sense of enti dement t o avoid victimization whic h just migh t spil l over into othe r areas, eve n if her arme d self-defens e cours e doe s no t include suc h training . Guns shoul d b e a social issue and concern. Bot h wome n fo r "domesti c dis armament" (Rose n 1993 , 464) and women wh o arm themselves are fighting fo r the sam e thing : freedo m from fea r an d violence. Th e battle betwee n anti - and pro-gun feminist s i s waged i n a way that get s both group s accuse d o f being too feminine and too muc h lik e men ; being stron g minde d and weak willed ; an d being self-determining and brainwashed b y a male-constructed ethic . The level of one' s womanhoo d o r o f one' s feminis m i s the trum p car d playe d b y bot h sides i n th e debate . A particula r se t o f assumption s withi n feminis m helpe d frame th e debate i n these terms . Many feminist s n o doub t mor e readil y accep t unarme d self-defense , possi bly due to the faulty assumptio n eithe r tha t a woman's arme d self-defens e nec essarily result s i n a fatalit y whil e a woman' s unarme d self-defens e necessaril y does not , or tha t a woman's trainin g i n firearms doe s no t yield th e empower ment effect s o f trainin g i n hand-to-han d combat . Bu t th e lin e separatin g th e acceptable form s o f self-defens e fro m th e unacceptabl e fade s a s feminist s acknowledge th e presence o f weapons i n th e martia l arts , th e potential t o kil l

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with a knuckle jab t o th e throa t o r a heel-palm strik e u p an d dow n th e nose , and tha t gun s use d i n self-defens e d o no t lea d t o anyone' s deat h i n mos t case s (Kleck 1991) . We ar e left wit h a general skepticism which, whil e ofte n directe d at women' s us e o f firearms specifically , leave s a large numbe r o f feminists sus picious, apathetic , o r dismissiv e o f self-defense mor e generally . Thi s sentimen t stems fro m a se t o f assumption s connected , howeve r unconsciously , wit h a series o f traditions withi n feminism .

The Legacy of Cultural Feminism Women's espousa l o f nonviolence as women leans on a cultural feminist agenda . A branc h o f th e women' s movemen t i n th e earl y 1970 s an d par t o f women' s activism fo r a century , cultura l feminis m insist s upo n women' s distinctivenes s and th e politica l importanc e o f tha t distinctivenes s (Echol s 1989). 3 Cultura l feminists appea l to women's life conditions—such a s worrying about one' s chil dren durin g war—to ge t women t o tak e a more consciousl y pacifis t stan d (e.g. , Morgan 1989) . Contemporar y cultura l feminist s d o no t necessaril y believ e i n some natura l gendere d order , i n whic h me n ar e programmed t o wag e wa r an d women ar e programme d t o clea n u p afte r them—althoug h thei r nineteenth century counterparts di d believe this (Donovan 1992 , 62). Instead, cultura l fem inists rall y wome n politicall y aroun d thing s wome n alread y "know " b y virtu e of the condition s o f their oppression , specificall y a n ethic s o f caring . Cultural feminist s d o no t writ e me n of f s o muc h a s they loo k t o women' s lifestyle habits , instead o f men's, a s normative guide s for actio n an d social orga nization. I n othe r words , powe r ha s create d wha t w e kno w t o b e masculinity , not vic e versa; similarly, subjugatio n ha s created wha t w e kno w t o be feminin ity, no t vic e versa . Cultura l feminist s hav e no t dismisse d men' s potentia l t o achieve wit h wome n a "partnershi p mode l society " instea d o f a "dominato r model society " (Eisle r 1987) . Indeed , the y encourag e nonviolenc e no t onl y i n terms of its status as "female culture " but in terms of its potential to lead to som e sort o f androgyny. Fo r instance , Bromle y (1982 , 154-55 ) states , The histor y o f th e "mal e way " o f counterin g violenc e wit h violenc e points directl y t o th e grave . The nonviolen t "femal e way " o f life-giving , nurturing, protecting the young and cooperative labor has pointed t o life , all through huma n existence . . . . We hav e al l see n evidenc e o f th e stirring s o f energ y i n th e women' s movement. Ma y thi s energ y suppl y vastl y increase , s o we ma y creat e th e means whereb y mal e aggressio n wil l b e controlle d an d women' s poten -

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 14 5 tial nonviolen t powe r b e enhanced , leadin g t o mor e androgynous , cre ative individuals . Bromley desire s androgyny , bu t he r descriptio n o f men' s aggressio n a s some thing tha t mus t b e controlled and women' s nonviolen t powe r a s something tha t should b e enhanced suggest s tha t the y ar e alread y existin g qualities , tendencie s that feminist s migh t solidif y eve n whil e workin g agains t them . Thos e cultura l feminist view s com e dangerousl y clos e to th e ide a that ther e i s a naturally exist ing "feminin e principle " tha t compliment s an d balance s ou t th e "masculin e principle." Cultural feminist s d o no t criticiz e femininit y bu t rathe r it s negativ e valua tion. I n her 197 3 article "Mothe r Right : A New Feminis t Theory, " Jane Alper t declared tha t avertin g nuclea r wa r an d ecologica l disaste r would tak e a society wide rejectio n o f the masculin e wa y an d a recognition o f the feminin e way : Could i t no t b e tha t just a t th e momen t tha t masculinit y ha s brough t u s to th e brin k o f nuclea r destructio n o r ecologica l suicide , wome n ar e beginning t o ris e i n respons e t o th e Mother' s cal l t o sav e He r plane t an d create instead th e nex t stag e of evolution? Ca n ou r revolutio n mea n any thing els e tha n th e reversio n o f social an d economi c contro l t o He r rep resentatives amon g Womankind , an d th e resumptio n o f Her worshi p o n the fac e o f the Earth ? (Alper t 1973 , 94) Attempts t o increas e women' s politica l participatio n an d elevat e thei r polit ical statu s o n th e ground s tha t wome n hav e better , o r special , insight s hav e a long history . Fo r instance , whil e me n trie d t o us e women's statu s a s delicate t o justify thei r inabilit y t o vot e (a s though th e vapor s i n th e votin g boot h woul d bowl wome n over) , som e wome n countere d b y sayin g tha t women' s mora l superiority ove r me n shoul d b e expresse d throug h voting . Making gun s (o r th e violenc e don e wit h them ) somethin g wome n shoul d control actually reinforces thei r social position as peaceful an d nurturing lifesavers. This social position is affirmed b y antigun folks themselves: "But it is the women , from grassroot s neighborhoo d group s t o th e PT A t o N O W , wh o ar e th e bes t organized constituenc y i n America n civi l society . A s Eleanor Roosevel t use d t o say whe n a problem seeme d intractable , 'Le t th e wome n d o it' " (Rose n 1993 , 465). As another antigu n activis t put it : "The possibilit y tha t excite d m e th e mos t is that gu n contro l migh t becom e anothe r are a in thi s century wher e wome n ac t as our nationa l conscience " (quote d i n ibid. , 466) . This sentimen t stem s from a n assumption tha t wome n shoul d tempe r mal e vice, not participat e i n it . But Nort h America n feminism' s legac y o f positionin g wome n a s morall y superior pacifists, th e custodians of all life (Donova n 1992 , 31-57), can only pro -

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vide limite d gains . Althoug h i t seem s importan t t o valu e "women' s culture " and th e contribution s wome n hav e made , eve n whil e politicall y subordinated , to th e overal l goo d o f th e communit y (instea d o f evaluatin g wome n wit h a male-centered standard) , such a framework simultaneousl y relegate s women t o virtues tha t hel p sustai n thei r subordination . Specifically , th e ideolog y o f women's nurturance , givin g freely an d expecting nothing from others , has con fined wome n t o relationship s tha t ar e unsatisfyin g an d eve n abusive . Further , the logi c use d t o legitimiz e women' s votin g right s faile d t o suppor t th e advancement o f wome n o f color—fo r the y wer e no t considere d delicat e o r morally superio r b y th e whit e me n decidin g whethe r o r no t t o gran t th e vote . Moreover, tha t logic still could no t legitimiz e an y woman's entranc e int o othe r important male-dominate d spheres . Cultural feminism tend s to set up a falsely universal "woman. " It s Goddesses, disempowered angels , and protesting mother s mostl y reflec t th e historica l con ditions o f white wome n i n particular . Th e "feminin e grace " tha t wome n wer e supposed t o maintai n b y staying out o f public politics was a grace reserved onl y for privileged , heterosexua l whit e women . Wome n o f colo r wer e no t grante d that grac e in ou r racis t society; the y commonl y ha d t o d o work outsid e o f thei r own homes , ofte n i n th e home s o f those virtuou s whit e ladies . Thi s ideology , then, eve n when turne d aroun d t o support women's rights , still left ou t wome n of color (Davi s 1983) . Sojourner Truth' s famou s speec h in favor o f voting right s for black s an d wome n throw s int o shar p relie f th e racis t doubl e standar d fo r femininity. Sh e countere d th e argumen t tha t wome n woul d succum b t o th e vapors i n a voting boot h b y remindin g peopl e tha t blac k wome n ar e expecte d to do back-breaking work, beseeching , "An d aren' t I a woman?" (Whit e 1985) . While whit e wome n wer e expecte d t o nee d hel p gettin g int o carriages , blac k women barel y counte d a s women a t all . Cultural feminis m continue s no t onl y racis t assumptions , bu t heterosexis t ones a s well. Lesbia n feminis t cultur e i n th e 1970 s upheld th e cultura l feminis t notion tha t women' s relationship s escape d male-define d norm s suc h a s hierar chy an d violence . However , a s I note d i n chapte r 1 , an d a s numerous lesbia n feminists hav e note d sinc e th e 1970s , th e designatio n o f women a s nonviolen t is often couche d i n a n ideology o f heterosexual virtu e an d ha s functioned a s an obstacle t o women' s freedo m (Alle n 1986 , 35) . Women fighting heterosexis m must brea k fro m th e constructio n o f womanhood a s the peacefu l all y o f mal e violence. A numbe r o f right-win g wome n actuall y suppor t wa r wit h th e ver y sam e heterosexist ideology—supportin g wa r support s thei r me n an d thei r families , and uphold s men' s statu s a s protectors o f women an d childre n (whic h explain s

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 14 7 why right wing-wome n oppos e wome n i n the fighting rank s o f the military) . Since ther e i s a nationalis t investmen t i n heterosexua l femininity , supportin g gender differenc e doe s no t necessarily oppos e war . Cultural feminist s ma y not agree wit h mos t o f the view s o f right-wing women , indee d the y rejec t al l violence, includin g rap e an d nationalist violenc e agains t innocen t countries . Bu t their rejectio n o f all violenc e leave s n o roo m fo r women' s self-defensiv e vio lence. Whether a s political strategy or theory o f gendered difference s i n aggression , the "separat e styles" approach centra l to the cultural feminist projec t migh t we D be abandoned . Ann e Campbel l (1993 , 55-56 ) uphold s th e separate-styles posi tion: "Fo r men, to b e a t th e merc y o f another person , whethe r physicall y o r symbolically, i s to be denied respect ; an d without respec t ther e ca n be no self esteem. Thu s me n aggres s t o prov e t o other s (an d so to themselves ) tha t the y merit respect . . . . The anger they feel is at the impertinence o f another person' s attempt t o devalu e o r humiliat e them . Unlik e women' s anger , i t i s abou t redressing socia l standing , no t abou t catharsis. " I hav e show n tha t th e self defense movemen t reveal s tha t i f there ar e gendered pattern s i n aggression, i t is that man y wome n fee l les s entitle d t o respec t an d t o reinforcin g tha t respec t than mos t men ; i f there is any ethical issue to address, it is not the pros and cons of an expressive versus an instrumental styl e of violence—as if women aggresse d only whe n s o furious the y explode d an d men only whe n denie d respect—bu t the gendere d pattern s i n entidemen t t o self-respect , an d the very rea l conflict s of interests me n and women sometime s display . W e shoul d address the conflict betwee n a man's sense that a woman's refusa l of se x i s a n offens e t o hi s socia l standin g an d a woman' s sens e tha t a man' s attempt t o force he r into sex is an offense t o her social standing. We share a cultural legac y i n whic h i t was deemed reasonabl e an d legal fo r a man to kil l a n unfaithful wif e an d her lover if he caugh t the m i n the act. This same culture has suggested tha t a woman' s killin g someon e t o sav e he r ow n lif e i n he r ow n home, i f th e perso n sh e kill s i s he r partne r o r ex-partne r (an d it ofte n is) , is immoral an d unreasonable. Feminis m i s about women' s right t o fee l th e sam e kind o f mastery ove r thei r socia l environment s a s men, and the sam e right t o defend threat s t o pride, dignity , an d that environment . Many hav e challenge d th e power-averse approac h i n feminism wit h regar d to sexual relations, emphasizing difference amon g women's sexua l styles and the impossibility o f havin g "power-tree " sexuality . Bu t worrie s abou t aggressio n carry o n cultura l feminism' s power-avers e legacy . Cultura l feminist s migh t say they ar e no t avers e t o powe r pe r se , but rathe r t o "powe r over " i n favo r o f "power with. " Wha t i n principl e seem s lik e a great idea , however , wind s u p

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ignoring th e real-lif e conflicts . Wha t count s a s "powe r with " t o on e perso n feels lik e "powe r over " t o another . Thi s dynami c i s fairly clea r whe n w e con sider women' s violen t self-defense . First , i t i s a cas e o f usin g violenc e agains t violence. Man y peopl e woul d no t hav e a problem wit h anyone' s righ t t o d o this. Bu t whe n w e conside r tha t th e mal e assailan t migh t no t experienc e a woman's violence against him as justifiable self-defense , especiall y if he does no t even understand his own action s as aggressive or "power over, " we ca n see ho w there ar e competin g definition s o f reality, competin g vision s ove r wha t count s as appropriate interactio n i n publi c an d private .

The Wake of the Sex Wars The constructio n o f women a s sexually passiv e an d me n a s sexually dangerou s is another , relate d legac y o f cultura l feminism . First-wav e feminis m a centur y ago not onl y embraced women's specia l moral virtues but als o positioned men' s sexuality a s belligerent an d competitiv e (Echol s 1989) . In focusin g o n th e dan gerous aspect s o f men's sexuality—whethe r o r no t i t i s now conceptualize d a s socially constructed—contemporar y feminist s hav e perpetuate d a n associatio n between masculin e sexualit y an d pleasur e o n th e on e hand , an d feminin e sex uality an d dange r o n th e other . Radica l feminist s i n th e anti-sexua l assaul t movement hav e continued thi s to some extent , while som e "pro-sex " feminist s have challenge d thi s association , arguin g tha t wome n ca n tak e pleasur e i n sex uality, an d eve n i n th e dangerou s thing s tha t ar e supposed t o b e unpleasurable . Both radica l an d cultura l feminist s o f the 1970 s attempted t o mak e thei r sexua l practices confor m t o thei r visio n o f a power-free world . Som e eve n suggeste d that sex with me n wa s bound t o be hierarchical , an d envisione d lesbianis m a s a personal mode l o f equality an d cooperatio n (ibid.) . This perspective, however , wrongly construe d women' s heterosexua l experience s a s always terrifyin g an d lesbian experience s a s wholesome. For women, sexualit y has been both repressiv e and dangerous as well as pleasurable and exciting . To o muc h focu s o n women' s sexua l victimization ignore s women's experienc e wit h sexua l agenc y and , som e suggest , increase s th e sex ual terror i n whic h wome n liv e (Vanc e 1989 , 1) . By th e lat e 1970s , some fem inists began t o embrac e form s o f sexual expressio n tha t ha d been deeme d form s of "false consciousness, " for instance, sadomasochistic se x or bisexuality (Echol s 1989, 291) . Th e anticensorshi p o r pro-se x feminist s trie d t o gai n suppor t fo r feminism no t by denying differences amon g women, bu t by emphasizing them . Thus th e pro-se x feminist s hav e urge d wome n t o spea k a s powerfully i n favo r

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 14 9 of sexual pleasur e a s they d o agains t sexua l danger . I n doin g so , women migh t break throug h stereotype s o f wome n a s naturall y passive , essentiall y differen t from me n i n eroti c style s and preferences , an d thu s challeng e som e o f the ver y myths tha t perpetuat e sexua l violence . Kirsten Marth e Lent z (1993 ) link s th e debate s abou t wome n wit h gun s t o the sex war s an d specificall y feminis t debate s abou t pornography . I n thes e debates, th e meanin g o f womanhoo d shifted . Anti-antipor n o r pro-se x femi nists challenge d th e victimize d subjec t o f th e antipor n group , an d favore d th e pleasure-in-danger rathe r tha n th e pleasure-versus-dange r framework . Lent z (ibid., 396 ) note s tha t bot h discourse s explor e masculin e vic e (porn/gun s an d violence) an d both discourse s establish a pleasurable "outlaw " statu s for women : The rebe l has agency in the form o f sexual (porn ) powe r o r lethal (guns ) power . But ultimatel y Lent z (ibid. , 395 ) criticize s women's arme d self-defens e because , she insists , it i s too simila r t o cultura l feminis m an d antipor n sentimen t (whic h she, howeve r erroneously , equates) : The onl y majo r departur e i n th e representationa l syste m o f Women & Guns from th e cultura l feminist , anti-por n discours e woul d b e th e repre sentation o f women. Whil e th e anti-por n discours e present s wome n a s thoroughly dominate d victims , th e rhetori c o f Women & Guns mos t cer tainly doe s not . . . . Her gu n make s he r a non-victim . I sugges t tha t thi s i s no mino r departure . Lentz (ibid. ) i s skeptical o f women's arme d self-defens e becaus e sh e thinks i t shares th e hidde n discursiv e commitment s o f a n antiporn , antise x feminis m (which sh e assume s construe d me n a s inherentl y dangerou s an d wome n a s inherently vulnerable) . Antipor n feminist s wer e primaril y criticize d fo r puttin g women i n th e positio n o f victim s o f dangerou s men . Th e appropriatio n o f "male" violenc e make s women' s gu n us e ver y differen t fro m antipor n femi nism, a t leas t a s it ha s been construe d b y it s opposition . Cultura l feminist s an d antiporn feminist s (Lent z collapse s thes e tw o positions ) wer e criticize d fo r rep resenting wome n a s good , wholesome , sexuall y innocent , an d o n thi s basi s politically insightful . But perhap s Lent z i s mor e concerne d tha t th e positionin g o f rap e amon g self-defensers make s the m mor e lik e th e asexua l victim s o f antiporn discourse . Women's arme d self-defens e rhetoric , a s Lent z read s i t throug h Women and Guns magazin e an d Quigley' s Armed and Female, turns rap e int o th e ultimat e terrible crim e on e must prevent fro m occurring . I n thi s way, self-defens e migh t depoliticize rap e an d sexuality , "producin g ne w articulation s o f the proble m o f women a s victims an d me n a s rapists/victimizers" (ibid.) . But self-defens e nee d

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not depoliticiz e rape . I n fact , unlik e muc h o f the anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t proper, th e self-defens e movemen t denaturalize s rap e without naturalizin g sex . By treatin g men' s coerciv e violenc e a s interactional strategie s tha t nee d no t succeed, self-defens e undermine s th e notio n o f men a s physically indestructibl e and wome n a s vulnerable— a centra l componen t o f th e naturalize d se x bina rism. Rathe r tha n assumin g tha t th e femal e bod y i s a sexualized violabl e inne r space, self-defens e aggressivel y refuse s a n attacker' s attemp t t o mak e femal e bodies int o thing s t o b e take n (Marcu s 1992) . Moreover, self-defens e practice s need no t desexualiz e women . B y harnessin g women' s aggressiv e desir e t o b e treated wit h respec t i n matter s o f sexualit y an d sexua l congresses , self-defens e construes wome n a s sexual agent s i n th e fulles t sense . In the popular imagination , a s well as in much feminis t rhetoric , women ar e construed a s eithe r consentin g t o o r refusin g sex—bu t no t a s activ e sexua l agents: "Th e feminin e par t i s to consen t o r t o refus e (t o b e taken ) rathe r tha n to desir e or will (t o take)" (Roone y 1983 , 1273) . Feminists hav e long posed th e question, H ow fre e ca n a woman's consen t to sex be if the man might have sim ply raped her had she refused? I n other words, how fre e ca n a yes be if no would not hav e bee n respected ? Whe n wome n i n self-defens e classe s lear n t o spea k their sexua l desires , asser t nos forcefully an d prepar e t o defen d the m aggres sively, the y ar e als o takin g themselve s seriousl y a s sexual beings . Self-defense make s possible th e vie w o f women no t a s passive but instea d a s active desirin g subjects . Thi s help s remov e wome n from th e impossibl e plac e of innocence i n whic h the y ca n onl y forcefull y clai m thei r victimhood , whe n victimized, vi a a notio n o f femal e asexua l innocence . Self-defens e allow s women t o b e pro-se x an d antirap e simultaneously . Thu s Lentz' s (1993 ) cyni cism abou t women' s arme d self-defens e a s an antiporn , antise x feminis m is , i n my view , unwarranted . Embracing women' s sexua l agenc y break s dow n th e oppositiona l associa tions betwee n whit e wome n an d wome n o f color , association s tha t hav e sus tained eac h othe r fo r th e maintenanc e o f whit e women' s privilege . Whit e women ceas e to be the sexually protected and prized ones, and women o f color, whose statu s in th e racis t imagination a s sexually disrespectabl e help s to solidif y white women' s statu s (i n much th e sam e way tha t women' s statu s a s physically incompetent help s t o solidif y men' s statu s a s physically powerful) , ceas e t o b e the socia l "others " o f white women . Antiviolence feminist s wh o ar e cynica l abou t women' s gu n us e o r violenc e more generall y see m wedde d t o a purity o f thei r own— a moral , politica l an d theoretical purit y tha t come s from refusin g t o ow n a gun an d bein g willin g t o harm one' s attacker . Thi s kin d o f purity ha s its own problems , namel y th e per -

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 15 1 petuation o f a n elitis t an d racis t bia s i n feminism . Veen a Cabreros-Su d (1995 ) suggests tha t i t is white wome n wh o benefi t from feminism' s stanc e o f political and theoretical purity. Th e racis m endemic t o th e constructio n o f womanhoo d as pure an d passive, and to the concomitan t reluctanc e t o embrac e violent resis tance, i s obvious t o Cabreros-Su d (ibid. , 44) , who finds that , upo n recountin g some o f her "choic e violen t moments, " mos t whit e feminist s are appalled , morall y repelle d b y thi s unbecomin g behavior . On e eve n giggled, holdin g he r breas t bon e eve r s o lightl y an d sayin g sh e i s a non violent type , bla h bla h blah . Th e message s are , o n th e surface , (1 ) I' m educated an d you'r e not , (2 ) I' m uppe r clas s and you'r e not , an d (3 ) I' m a feminis t an d you'r e no t (sinc e he r bran d o f feminis m i s equate d wit h nonviolent moon-to-uteru s symbiosis) . I have already suggested tha t white women , no t wome n o f color, hav e ben efited from feminism' s mora l purit y stance . Still , i t i s possibl e tha t wome n o f color canno t affor d t o engag e i n th e "impurity " o f self-defens e politics , a s i t could exacerbat e th e ver y association s the y hav e fough t against , namel y th e associations betwee n peopl e o f colo r an d violenc e an d impurit y (hook s 1992 , 160). On th e othe r hand , Cabreros-Su d (1995 , 46) worries mor e abou t th e fea r of embracin g violen t resistanc e o n th e par t o f "th e ivor y towe r debutantes, " positioning hersel f afBrmingly i n th e categor y o f "the alternatel y poor, colored , Third World , loud , violent , nast y girls. " Thus, eve n i f self-defens e trainin g feel s particularl y subversiv e fo r whit e women whos e rac e privileg e an d gende r subordinatio n hav e historicall y bee n based o n thei r statu s a s sexually pur e an d weak , self-defens e politic s migh t b e more accountabl e t o wome n o f colo r tha n cultura l feminism' s antiviolence . When wome n ar e represente d as , o r encourage d t o be , ver y differen t from men, gende r become s falsel y construe d a s the onl y for m o f oppression. Instea d of a politics tha t presumes tha t wome n shoul d kee p awa y from everythin g me n do, self-defens e blur s th e boundarie s o f masculin e an d feminine . I n s o doing , self-defense deconstruct s th e essentialize d an d racis t notio n o f "womanhood. " Embracing women' s lac k o f innocenc e migh t mak e whit e wome n tak e more responsibilit y fo r th e way s i n whic h the y oppres s wome n an d me n o f color, an d mak e heterosexua l wome n o f an y rac e tak e mor e responsibilit y fo r the way s i n whic h the y perpetuat e discriminatio n agains t gay s an d lesbians . A s Jane Fla x (1990, 181-82 ) points out, "W e nee d t o avoid seeing women a s totally innocent, acte d upo n beings . Suc h a view prevent s u s from seein g th e area s o f life i n whic h wome n hav e ha d a n effect , ar e no t totall y determine d b y th e wil l of the other, an d the ways in which som e women hav e and do exert power ove r

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others." Cabreros-Sud (1995 , 45) states that the form o f feminism tha t we migh t call "innocenc e feminism " implie s "tha t one' s ow n collaboratio n wit h mass approved violence—i.e. , institutiona l racism , Firs t World nationalism , an d apa thetic complacency—doesn' t count. " Thus , th e dispositio n o f feminine purit y cultivated amon g whit e women , an d th e concomitan t politica l stanc e o f paci fism, migh t b e dismantle d fo r a better, mor e strongl y antiracis t feminis m tha t doesn't le t whit e wome n of f th e hoo k fo r th e atrocitie s they'v e supported . Of course , thi s itself attempts t o cleans e feminis m o f a set o f impurities wit h which, say , cultural feminists agains t guns are willing to live. In the former case , expunging gende r categorie s a s a wa y t o dea l wit h th e proble m o f violenc e (risking tha t violenc e wil l remain ) i s preferre d ove r a cultura l feminis t us e o f these categorie s t o ge t ri d o f violence (riskin g that gende r an d rac e inequalitie s will remain). The questio n ma y com e dow n t o whic h strateg y seem s to reduc e the violenc e w e alread y face . Fo r many , th e issu e amount s t o a mathematica l equation: Violenc e plu s violence equal s mor e violence .

Increasing Violence Closely relate d t o th e worr y tha t women' s indulgenc e i n masculin e vice s wil l hinder, no t help , th e transformatio n o f societ y i s th e fea r tha t al l thes e image s and practice s o f women' s aggression , especiall y women' s gu n ownership , wil l simply mak e th e worl d a n eve n mor e violen t place . Thi s sentimen t i s echoe d in debate s abou t wome n takin g u p comba t position s i n th e military . Fo r instance, Mil t Levi n (1990 , B n) wrot e t o th e Los Angeles Times declaring tha t training women fo r comba t actuall y help s conditio n u s to accep t wa r a s a wa y of life: "Sendin g women, th e future mother s o f our country , t o war is criminal. Sending wome n int o comba t i s uncivilized an d insane . Let' s kee p ou r wome n feminine, genteel , kin d an d lovable." Like cultura l feminist arguments , worrie s that th e worl d wil l ge t mor e violen t positio n wome n a s th e grou p wh o i s responsible fo r worl d peac e an d mora l order . Some people thin k equa l opportunities fo r goo d a s well as for vice s will cre ate more femal e seria l killers and dea d husbands . N o statistica l evidenc e t o dat e supports thi s concern . A close r rati o o f women t o me n commi t spousa l homi cide (althoug h wome n mor e ofte n tha n me n kil l spouses in self-defense ) i n th e United State s tha n i n Canad a o r Grea t Britai n (Wilso n an d Dal y 1992) . Thi s might b e regarde d a s evidence tha t th e diminutio n o f traditional se x roles lead s women t o murde r wit h almos t a s grea t a frequenc y a s men . Bu t i f thi s wer e true, th e rati o o f women t o me n nonspousa l familia l murderer s woul d b e just

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as high, whic h i s not th e cas e (ibid. , 194-96) . The greate r availabilit y o f guns i n the United State s might b e regarde d a s a cause of the greate r sex ratio o f spousal homicide. However , researc h reveal s tha t th e relativel y smal l ga p i n husban d and wif e victim s i n th e Unite d State s predates th e contemporar y prevalenc e o f gun killing s (ibid. , 193) . Further, th e sex ratio o f spousal homicide i s not greate r for shooting s tha n fo r othe r homicides ; i n fact , i t i s lower, revealin g tha t "gu n use is still predominantly th e provinc e o f men an d tha t women' s lethalit y rela tive t o tha t o f men i s actually greate r whe n case s involving gun s ar e excluded " (ibid., 193) . Other s thin k tha t women' s styl e o f killin g ma y com e t o resembl e men's, bu t thi s i s also speculatio n unsupporte d b y an y statistica l data . It woul d b e dangerou s an d simplisti c t o assig n feminis m responsibilit y fo r female murderers . Worries tha t women's self-defens e wil l onl y mak e th e worl d a more violen t plac e ignor e (o r tak e fo r grante d a s natural) th e men' s violenc e that women' s self-defensiv e violenc e coul d prevent . Besides , women' s abilit y to violentl y defen d themselve s migh t no t increas e men' s violenc e bu t dete r i t by instillin g i n me n a fear o f immediate negativ e consequences . Some might fea r tha t women's increase d empowermen t throug h self-defens e will spu r me n t o ste p u p th e leve l o f violence o r th e numbe r o f weapons wit h which the y assault women, creatin g not a deterrent effec t o n men' s violence bu t a "backlash " agains t wome n wh o ar e encroachin g o n men' s privilege . I hav e attempted t o conve y a subtler picture o f power relation s and o f masculinity tha n that whic h underlie s thi s suggestion . I n chapte r 1 , I argue d tha t rap e doe s no t necessarily procee d b y wa y o f violent o r oppressiv e intention . I argued tha t no t all me n wh o rap e "intend " t o gai n powe r ove r wome n wit h thei r actions , although thei r actions accomplish just that . The conspiratoria l view tha t men ar e intentionally tryin g t o contro l wome n i s to o simplistic . Me n assaul t wome n because wome n ar e eas y targets, an d the y ofte n ge t awa y wit h i t because o f th e gender ideolog y tha t construe s wome n a s sexually passiv e an d pacifist . For the men wh o rap e their date s with carefull y constructe d fancifu l notion s of their dates' consent—the imperceptiv e rapist s who d o not thin k tha t they ar e doing anythin g wrong—knowin g tha t wome n ar e likel y t o sto p the m aggres sively i s no t likel y t o hav e a deterren t effect . I n thi s case , though , a woman' s ability t o defen d hersel f fro m suc h a man i s stil l likel y t o sto p hi m fro m com pleting th e attack , thu s interruptin g th e ver y imperceptivenes s wit h whic h h e attacked. Felson' s (1996 , 444 ) researc h indicate s tha t one' s perceptio n o f th e physical power o f one's opponen t doe s no t affec t one' s likelihoo d t o engag e i n an arme d attack , althoug h i t doe s affec t th e likelihoo d tha t on e woul d engag e in a n unarme d attack . Thi s suggest s tha t w e migh t se e me n attac k wome n less , not mor e ofte n o r mor e ofte n wit h weapons .

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One socia l progra m showe d tha t women' s readines s t o fight bac k deter s assailants; i t traine d femal e citizen s o f Orlando , Florida , i n th e us e o f firearms and publicize d thi s trainin g widely . Th e progra m wa s studie d fo r it s effec t o n crime. A s Klec k (1991 , 134 ) reports , betwee n 196 6 an d 1967 , th e Orland o Police Departmen t gav e 2,50 0 wome n defensiv e handgu n training . Th e rap e rate decrease d b y 8 8 percen t i n 1967 , compare d t o 1966 , a decreas e fa r large r than i n an y previous one-yea r period . (Th e rap e rate was constant i n the res t o f Florida an d th e Unite d States. ) Still , crim e ma y wel l hav e bee n displace d ont o areas outsid e Orlando , wher e wome n wer e stil l know n t o b e sittin g ducks . While five year s afte r th e progra m th e rap e rat e was 1 3 percent belo w th e pre program leve l i n Orlando , i t ha d increase d 30 0 percen t i n th e immediat e are a around Orland o (Kate s 1989 , 12) . Thi s suggest s tha t th e deterren t effec t o f women's self-defens e i s substantial, but woul d hav e to be take n u p i n every cit y to actuall y dete r assailant s altogether . O n anothe r level , it is possible tha t i f men se e women a s capable o f fighting, then thos e men whos e restrain t i s simply based o n manl y fight etiquette , whic h suggests tha t a proper fighter no t pic k o n a weaker targe t (Campbel l 1993 , 6061), ma y n o longe r hav e reaso n t o se e women a s inappropriate target s fo r vio lence. Bu t then , i f the self-defens e movemen t subvert s th e ide a tha t ther e i s a "weaker sex " and in so doing makes a woman see m as likely a target for aggres sion, i t make s he r a s unlikely a target fo r aggressio n fo r th e sam e reason . I f this occurred, w e migh t stil l liv e i n a violent world , bu t on e i n whic h w e woul d have to debate how t o control specific type s of violence rather than policing th e borders o f manhood an d womanhood .

Aggression As Unvaryingly Dangerous Another reaso n leadin g feminist s t o dismis s women' s aggressiv e self-defens e a s ineffective masculinis t influenc e ha s t o d o wit h th e wa y feminist s hav e struc tured aggressio n itself . Cultura l feminist s hav e bee n power-avers e an d hav e sought practice s tha t oppos e "male " way s o f doing things . I f aggression i s see n as corrupt an d unvaryingl y dangerous , the n women' s cultivatio n o f it mus t b e ignoble. In he r advic e t o battere d wome n base d o n he r stud y o f severa l hundre d o f them, Bowke r (1986 , 28) note s tha t counterviolence , o r threat s o f it, di d wor k to reduc e men' s violenc e whe n th e husband s wer e convince d tha t thei r wive s were serious . Fo r instance , whe n th e wome n woul d poin t ou t tha t the y coul d kill their husbands while they were sleeping , an d the husbands genuinely feare d

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 15 5 the homicida l threats , "th e threat s shocke d the m int o realizin g th e seriousnes s of thei r ow n behavior , o r the y cam e t o 'respect ' thei r wive s mor e fo r havin g fought back " (ibid.) . Bu t rathe r tha n presen t thi s a s evidenc e tha t wome n should (effectively , strongly ) fight back , sh e continue s o n a cautionar y note : "Gaining you r husband' s respec t b y engagin g i n behavio r tha t i s valued i n th e world of macho men lowers you to his moral level instead of raising him to your moral level" (ibid., my emphasis) . Bowker remind s women tha t her study showe d tha t ineffective resistance di d no t wor k t o sto p men' s violenc e an d caution s the m no t to tak e chance s tha t woul d resul t i n eve n mor e sever e beatings . However , th e author doe s no t poin t ou t wha t kind s o f counterviolenc e tactic s d o wor k o r what kind s o f strategies wome n ca n successfull y employ . No r doe s th e autho r acknowledge tha t her study is skewed by its focus o n women wh o staye d in vio lent relationship s instea d o f exiting (b y whatever means). 4 In orde r t o dra w publi c attentio n t o th e oppressio n o f women, whic h i s no t always located o n th e body , feminist s describe d nonbodil y form s o f oppressio n as "violent." Thu s feminis t politic s have construe d violence to mea n oppressive or diminishing—hence som e feminists ' claim s tha t leer s an d patronizin g jokes ar e cases o f violence , an d henc e feminis t trepidatio n abou t women' s participatio n in violent sport s such a s rugby, eve n thoug h th e effect s o f the violence o n indi vidual participant s an d o n societ y ma y no t b e degradin g o r oppressiv e (Liddl e 1989, 766) . Suc h a framework ha s backed feminist s int o a corner: I t leave s ou t the possibilit y o f legitimat e o r nonoppressiv e violence , notabl y women' s self defensive violenc e (ibid.) , and subtl y require s damaged , violate d bodie s t o sub stantiate claim s that women ar e oppressed. Th e mora l meanin g assigne d t o var ious violen t acts mus t b e questioned , s o tha t wome n wh o kil l t o protec t thei r own jeopardized live s ar e no t considere d ba d bu t i n fac t exercisin g thei r righ t to self-defense . Wome n wh o defen d themselve s would, o f course, prefer no t t o need to . Women ar e oppressed becaus e the y ar e targeted fo r abuse , whether o r not the y successfull y fen d i t off . When i t come s t o wome n engagin g i n combat , som e feminists , lik e man y others, hav e a problem. Afte r all , ho w wil l th e feminis t critiqu e o f masculinit y or patriarchy surviv e i f women actuall y star t t o identif y wit h th e ver y pleasure s we hav e define d a s the problem ? I f self-defense i s taken u p wit h seriousness , a s a necessary evil , the n i t migh t b e tolerabl e t o feminists . Bu t i f self-defense spill s over int o ne w arenas , lik e competitiv e comba t shootin g o r amateu r boxing , then wome n ar e finding somethin g pleasurabl e i n combat . Wha t make s som e feminists uneas y i s the pleasurable nature of the combat. Violenc e i s always bad , s o women shoul d no t enjo y i t an d feminist s shoul d no t advocat e it . I f wome n were learnin g comba t bu t di d no t enjo y it , the n i t migh t b e tolerabl e t o femi -

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nists. Feminists are skeptical of popular pleasures, and women's fu n migh t mea n women gettin g duped . Thi s i s connected wit h a n assumptio n tha t ou r politica l work shoul d b e serious ; if it's pleasurable the n w e ar e no t takin g violence seri ously, and/o r w e ar e mor e likel y t o b e co-opted . "Gettin g mean " i s fun ; i n class, some self-defenser s eve n "nee d a mugging. " While som e feminist s dispute d women' s exclusio n from domain s define d a s male, suc h a s sports , an d helpe d creat e law s (suc h a s Titl e IX ) tha t woul d increase gende r equalit y i n thos e areas , other s simultaneousl y critique d th e enjoyment o f those competitiv e sport s a s "masculinist." Som e argu e tha t sport s should b e ope n t o wome n an d tha t wome n joinin g thes e sport s ar e no t "becoming (jus t like) men," because women play sports for the feelings o f physical competence , playfulness , an d pleasure s o f developin g bodil y skills . Bu t i f women enjo y a sport fo r th e sam e reason s tha t feminist s an d masculinit y theo rists (e.g. , Messner 1990 ) hav e chastise d me n fo r enjoyin g sport s (i.e. , the plea sure o f dominatio n an d combat) , then , som e migh t fear , a critiqu e o f mas culinity wil l no t b e sustained . However, wome n migh t no t engag e i n martia l arts , self-defense , o r firearms ownershi p th e wa y me n have . Althoug h sport s hav e emphasize d masculinity, an d thu s hav e bee n competitive , aggressive , enemy-oriented , and s o on , wome n ma y fin d camaraderie , physica l self-love , fun , an d cooper ation a s much a s th e othe r things . A s on e gu n studen t tol d me , wome n wil l not necessaril y perpetuat e th e syste m a s is . A boxin g instructo r tol d m e tha t she enjoy s th e aggressiv e comba t o f boxin g bu t reject s th e stereotyp e tha t boxing i s violent o r implie s tha t on e i s a violent (i.e. , exceptionall y masculin ized) person . Women's self-defens e ha s a n impac t simila r t o women' s sports , bu t i t i s potentially mor e radical . Whil e femal e athlete s ar e physical , self-defens e draws women , man y o f who m ar e no t athletic , becaus e o f a proble m con nected wit h mal e domination . Women' s self-defens e coul d downpla y femi nist leaning s a s easil y a s women' s athleti c program s hav e i n orde r t o gai n respectability (Searle s an d Berge r 1987 , 78) . Ye t women' s self-defens e train ing pose s mor e o f a threat tha n women' s athletic s becaus e i t canno t a s easil y be frame d a s a n activit y tha t involve s physica l an d natura l skill s (Clark e an d Clarke 1982 , 63) . Simply advocatin g "nonviolence " i s pointless, especiall y for feminists . Fem inists who advocat e a woman's righ t t o lega l abortions ar e accuse d routinel y o f violence b y thos e wh o conside r abortio n murder . Wha t matter s i s ho w w e define th e actio n an d th e context . Th e us e o f violenc e implie s boundaries . Simone d e Beauvoir (1952 , 369-70) wrot e tha t "violenc e i s the authenti c proo f

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 15 7 of each one' s loyalt y t o himself , t o hi s will. . . . I t i s a profound frustratio n no t to b e abl e t o registe r one' s feeling s upo n th e fac e o f the world. " Lakelan d an d Wolf (1980 , 13 ) write : "W e mus t reclai m fo r ourselve s al l huma n potentials , including thos e undul y establishe d a s masculine, tha t is , those monopolize d b y men i n orde r t o enslav e u s more thoroughly . . . . For instance , violence : it' s u p to u s to choos e it s form an d it s goals. " If women abdicat e violenc e withou t bein g capabl e o f i t anyhow , i t make s less of an impac t tha n i f that abdicatio n wer e a real choice . Stieh m (1982 , 376 ) notes that "muc h 'successfu l nonviolence ' i s related t o havin g (1 ) a potential fo r violence t o renounce o r (2 ) having someone els e use or threaten forc e fo r one. " Having th e capacit y fo r violenc e doe s no t mea n on e wil l ac t manipulativel y o r violently. Jus t a s mal e martia l art s expert s ar e ofte n know n t o b e a s gentle , polite, an d discernin g i n matter s o f conflict o n th e street s a s they ar e rough an d ruthless in the dojo, wome n wit h th e capacit y for violence ar e not likel y to star t attacking innocents , pickin g fights, o r verball y abusing . If women' s self-defens e help s wome n gai n som e o f th e protectiv e power s that me n an d th e stat e hav e monopolized , thereb y removin g wome n fro m th e class of "th e protected " (ibid.) , the n wome n o f color , wh o hav e bee n th e vic tims o f violence no t onl y b y me n bu t b y th e polic e (e.g. , harassment, threat s o f deportation, trivializatio n o f thei r complaints , an d assault ) (Matthew s 1994 , 151), might b e a t least a s liberated b y a framework tha t dissociate s me n an d th e state fro m th e clas s o f "protectors " an d "defenders. " Afte r all , eve n i f whit e women begi n t o realiz e (experientiall y o r throug h th e claim s o f feminists) tha t the men wh o ar e supposed t o be protecting the m ar e frequently th e one s assailing them , whit e wome n ar e stil l relatively likel y t o believ e tha t th e polic e wil l help the m i n a time o f crisi s (ibid.) . Further , self-defens e weaken s th e hetero sexist assumption tha t man an d woman ar e a natural pair that functions togethe r in a protector-protected relationship . If aggression is seen as a chaotic force tha t rips the social fabric (Gilmor e 1987 ) then women—th e one s assigne d b y traditio n t o maintai n th e harmon y o f rela tionships an d th e dignit y o f society—who ar e aggressiv e appea r a s an extremel y dangerous an d perhap s eve n irresponsibl e lot . I n thi s light , self-defens e cultur e can clearly appreciate its potential for dram a and catharsis, and even find pleasur e in thes e dramati c interventions. 5 I n thinkin g o f aggression a s sometimes appro priate, self-defensers , an d anyon e wh o advocate s th e us e o f handgun s fo r self defense, must carefully conside r when an d under what circumstance s lethal forc e is appropriate. Bu t w e migh t d o bette r t o argu e ove r wha t type s o f self-protec tive violenc e shoul d b e lega l an d appropriat e i n way s tha t d o no t positio n women a s the one s responsibl e fo r maintainin g th e mora l order .

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Co-optation Another are a of discomfort fo r feminism i s closely related to the assumption tha t violence is always oppressive and therefore bad . Feminism's revolutionary over tones, i n whic h w e imagin e th e postrevolutionar y worl d a s peaceful, nonvio lent, harmonious , an d power-free, require s us to imagin e a complete chang e i n the "masculinist " wa y thing s ar e done . Th e significan t vie w behin d establishe d feminist politic s i s represente d i n th e oft-quote d statemen t o f Audr e Lord e (1984, 112) : "For th e master' s tool s will neve r dismantl e th e master' s house. " Feminists' revolutionar y strateg y mad e centra l concern s abou t ho w con sciousness develop s an d ho w i t i s acte d upo n realit y (Donova n 1992 , 87) . I t emphasizes th e integrit y o f th e proces s o f change , insistin g tha t th e proces s i s part o f th e change : "Th e en d canno t full y justif y th e means . T o a surprisin g extent, th e end is the means" (Steinem , quote d i n ibid.). This classic social anar chist theor y place s primac y o n th e ide a tha t no t onl y shoul d th e postrevolu tionary worl d b e power-fre e an d nonviolen t bu t s o to o shoul d th e actua l process o f revolution . Som e contemporar y feminists , includin g socialis t femi nists, believ e tha t women' s culture , experience , an d practic e ca n provid e th e basis for feminis t oppositio n t o destructiv e patriarcha l ideologie s (ibid. , 87-89) . The assumption s o f cultural feminis m ar e als o a t work here—tha t som e thing s are "hi s ways" an d othe r thing s ar e "ou r ways. " Those who d o no t wan t t o accus e women o f being like men accus e wome n of bein g dupe s o f men . I n thi s logic , i f gun s ar e "bo y toys " the n s o ar e th e women wh o us e them . Thos e committe d t o a cause ten d t o understan d thos e who d o not agree with the m as not acting consciously (e.g. , Jones 1994) . If antigun feminist s wh o ar e investe d i n seein g gun s a s a gender issue , a "ma n prob lem," ca n simply say that women wh o shoo t o r d o anythin g that is traditionall y masculine are not engage d in conscious action, then the y can explain away thei r ideological opponent s a s foolish . Wolf (1993 , 44) suggests that women wh o rejec t th e feminist labe l find mor e appealing th e Nik e corporation' s slogan , "Jus t D o It. " Althoug h feminist s ma y be skeptical o f the corporatizatio n o f grass-roots feminist politics , Nike ha s captured somethin g appealing : Self-reliance , physicality , competition , winning , and strength . I t i s just thi s appea l tha t render s women' s pleasurabl e resistanc e vulnerable t o capitalis t co-optation . Feminism's revolutionar y overtone s make s th e concer n ove r co-optatio n particularly acute . Feminis t cultura l critic s hav e suggeste d tha t eve n practice s that see m t o disrup t th e conventiona l bodil y code s o f sexual difference o r chal lenge th e passivit y o f the femal e bod y (athletics , for instance ) becom e recuper -

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 15 9 ated b y a capitalis t syste m tha t profit s from thos e progressiv e bod y projects , thereby maintainin g th e femal e bod y a s a commodity , an d a fetishized , eroti cized on e a t that—eve n i n a pair o f Nikes . But i t i s true tha t women' s popula r pleasure s tak e plac e i n a complex socia l setting o f consume r capitalism , sexism , racism , an d heterosexism . Th e recen t proliferation o f visua l representation s o f toug h wome n i n advertisement s fo r self-defense product s an d instructio n ofte n stil l eroticiz e women . Fo r instance , an N RA advertisemen t feature d a muscle-bound woma n i n a bikini with a gun. Tough woma n image s have appeared i n advertisements fo r products no t relate d to self-defense . Fo r example , a n advertisemen t fo r Caffein e Fre e Die t Cok e depicts a woman boxe r cooll y knocking out on e conceite d mal e wanna-be vic tor after another . Revlon' s mascar a advertisemen t boast s "knockout lashes " an d features Suga r Ra y Leonar d an d five to p femal e model s holdin g fists in boxin g gloves u p i n fighting stance . Feminist cultura l critic s concerne d wit h capitalism , co-optation , sexua l objectification, an d beaut y standard s migh t worr y tha t th e toug h woma n wil l simply becom e th e ne w se x object , an d tha t strengt h an d self-defens e trainin g will contribute t o a new, eve n stricter , beauty standar d forced o n women. Cap italism, a s i t ha s perpetuate d women' s subordination , become s th e objec t o f feminist skepticis m n o matte r what . Eve n th e rewardin g aspect s lik e competi tion an d winnin g (a t least i n th e contex t o f sports), whic h migh t hel p wome n in thi s culture , ar e scorned . Th e possibilit y o f capitalis t co-optatio n ca n hardl y constitute a reaso n no t t o embrac e self-defense . Fo r capitalis m ha s to o lon g fueled women' s inabilit y t o fight. Worries abou t who' s buyin g int o whos e valu e syste m presum e tha t ther e i s some social , political, o r theoretica l locatio n from whic h wome n ca n renounc e all that i s masculinist, racist , o r capitalist . Bu t w e canno t escap e th e value s tha t have dominated ou r socia l institutions. Further , certai n activitie s seem to reflec t such value s onl y becaus e me n currentl y engag e i n them . W e hav e investe d s o much energ y i n critiquin g th e mistake s o f male dominan t cultur e tha t w e hav e neglected t o elaborat e alternativ e form s o f female subjectivity . Som e woul d sa y that women' s entranc e int o violenc e canno t b e a ne w for m o f subjectivity , because i t is male. Yet women' s pacifis m i s not a new for m o f subjectivity; i t is simply not-mal e i n a patriarcha l contex t tha t define s ma n a s aggressive . W e must have a new for m o f female subjectivit y whil e stil l stressing a new visio n o f subjectivity a t large (Braidott i 1994 , 161) . W e mus t als o ask if women o f color will benefit o r lose from th e ne w visua l representations o f (primarily ) whit e femal e heroism . A greate r diversit y o f women i n heroi c role s migh t enabl e mor e wome n t o identif y wit h th e hero -

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ism. Women's emancipator y activitie s cannot escap e the capitalis t context. Th e racism of Hollywood, whic h put s white actor s in most o f the choic e roles , doe s not indicat e tha t racis m i s endemic t o image s o f tough wome n o r t o women' s self-defense i n particular . Th e racis m i s no t peculia r t o women' s self-defense , therefore i t i s no t self-defens e pe r s e tha t i s racis t o r tha t demand s representa tion i n racis t ways . State co-optatio n migh t als o concer n skeptic s o f self-defense . Attempt s t o change structure s tha t obviousl y nee d t o be change d coul d wind u p reinforcin g those structures . Severa l feminis t scholar s hav e note d th e complexit y o f femi nist activists ' involvemen t wit h th e state . Stat e engagemen t i s risky . Feminis t intentions o n th e par t o f thos e wh o receiv e stat e fundin g doe s no t guarante e that th e wor k contribute s t o women' s liberatio n (see , e.g. , Matthew s 1994 ; Reinelt 1995) . After all , the rape crisis movement ha d to emphasiz e rap e as violent in orde r t o get state funding, a strategy tha t inadvertently solidifie d th e sex is-natural-and-good assumption . Thi s definitio n transforme d th e feminis t rap e crisis movement int o yet another stat e agency with professiona l demands , qual ification/certification requirements , an d various stat e control s (Matthew s 1994 , 149-66). Th e movement s agains t rap e an d batter y tha t hav e attracte d fundin g and th e attentio n o f N OW hav e bee n co-opte d i n som e ways . Self-defense, eve n whe n develope d i n a capitalis t context , i s on e practic e that doe s no t legitimat e stat e intervention s i n ou r everyda y lives . O n th e con trary, self-defens e make s possibl e women' s self-sufficienc y i n thi s particula r regard. T o som e extent , th e informal , grassroot s characte r o f self-defens e ha s helped i t remai n a radical projec t (Searle s an d Berge r 1987 , 69) . Thi s make s i t vulnerable i n differen t ways , however . Specifically , Searle s an d Berger' s (ibid. ) case-history stud y o f on e self-defens e organizatio n show s tha t th e trademar k feminist principle s o f grassroot s organizing—namely , a democrati c structure , heavy relianc e o n th e volunteere d tim e o f committed activists , an d availabilit y to a s many wome n fo r a s little cos t a s possible—caused increasin g tension s an d troubles fo r th e maintenanc e an d expansio n o f th e organization . Th e financial and tim e commitment s require d t o teac h women' s self-defens e cause d com mitted instructors t o give up teaching. As a last resort, th e organizatio n change d into a private, for-profit business , causing many feminist s involve d t o resent th e certification requirements , licensin g fee s an d agreements , an d s o on , an d ulti mately t o disengag e fro m th e organization . I n thi s light , whethe r o r no t women's self-defens e shoul d be privat e o r government-funde d i s questionable . Feminists hav e inadvertentl y pushe d women , a s oppresse d people , t o b e pure victim s whos e awarenes s i s clea r (a t leas t afte r a few standar d conscious ness-raising sessions ) an d whos e action s ar e clean . Bu t w e can' t striv e fo r vio -

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 16 1 lence-free ideal s when w e ar e victimized b y violence . Moreover , a nonviolen t stance in feminist politic s ignores the ways in which power is not simpl y restric tive o r repressiv e but als o productive, capabl e o f generating ne w form s o f pleasure an d ne w identitie s an d position s from whic h t o resis t th e statu s qu o (Woodhull 1988) . A notio n o f progres s tha t view s humanit y locke d ont o som e guide d pat h toward collectiv e self-realizatio n i s philosophically naiv e an d politicall y short sighted. Further , powe r i s no t centralized , existin g solel y a s a repressiv e forc e deployed by the stat e or by men a s a class. Power i s decentralized, whic h mean s that transformin g socia l relation s wil l no t necessaril y procee d b y wa y o f revo lution bu t b y change s a t th e everyda y mundan e leve l (Foucaul t 1970) . W e might abandon th e vision of a centralized power tha t will be overturned b y rev olutionary chang e an d admi t tha t histor y proceed s differently , wher e fights ar e never over , an d violenc e an d exclusion s ar e inevitable. Feminist s coul d chang e the rule s an d chang e wha t count s a s deviant, an d feminis m coul d offe r a differ ent ethic—fo r example , on e i n whic h men' s sexua l violence woul d b e margin alized instea d o f normalized . W e shoul d b e attune d t o th e way s i n whic h oppositio n t o violenc e harm s women presentl y i n danger , ignore s women' s pleasur e i n it , make s to o littl e o f men's fea r o f it , an d play s int o Victoria n notion s o f morall y superio r woman hood—an ideolog y tha t justified whit e women' s clas s an d racia l privilege , an d men's privilege to vote, speak, write, and edify themselves . Many o f the wome n I spok e wit h tol d m e tha t the y wishe d tha t w e live d i n a world withou t vio lence o r guns . But , the y woul d add , w e d o not , an d the y mus t conten d wit h the realit y i n whic h w e d o live . W e nee d t o ris k co-optatio n an d ris k appear ing as if we supporte d masculinis t values . Self-defense an d th e feminis m behin d it g o beyond a moral positio n o f critique an d constitut e a force fo r institutiona l change. The rejectio n o f "ideologically pur e bab y steps " in favo r o f "practical gian t steps" i s wha t Naom i Wol f call s "powe r feminism " (Wol f 1993 , 53) . He r power feminis m i s not a n agenda , muc h les s one lik e th e NRA' s Refus e t o B e a Victim program ; no r i s power feminis m a politics that denie s women ar e victimized, systematically . Powe r feminis m discard s th e impossibl e perfect-and powerless stanc e i n favo r o f makin g compromise s t o us e powe r fo r socia l change. While Wol f (ibid. , 136 ) carefully distinguishe s hersel f from popula r antifem inist feminist s lik e Kati e Roiph e an d Camill e Paglia , sh e claim s tha t on e o f th e "real difference s i n power " betwee n me n an d wome n tha t Roiph e shoul d no t ignore is "physical strength." Wolf (ibid. , 216-20 , 314-15 ) claim s that she want s

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to benefit fro m th e fear tha t women's increase d gun us e or other trainin g migh t inspire i n men , bu t sh e doe s no t roc k th e feminis t boa t b y goin g s o fa r a s t o embrace women' s self-defens e a s par t o f he r powe r feminis t agenda . Wolf s reluctance t o organiz e wome n t o fight bac k physicall y show s th e exten t t o which th e oppositio n t o violence , withou t deconstructin g th e sexis t discours e of bodies , ha s becom e a centra l axi s aroun d whic h feminis t politic s revolve . Still, what sh e suggest s ca n hel p fram e women' s self-defense .

Physicality and Bodily Discipline Another overarchin g assumptio n tha t ha s kep t feminist s from embracin g self defense a s a feminist projec t involve s th e place of the body i n feminism. It' s no t that feminist s hav e ignore d th e body . Whethe r it' s reproductiv e rights , beaut y culture, pornography , eatin g disorders , alternativ e sexualities , o r sexua l vio lence, a large portion o f feminist activis m and theorizing concerns th e body an d its control , representation , discipline , o r violation . Bu t ironically , i t i s just thi s way o f lookin g a t th e bod y tha t ha s rendere d th e bod y wor k o f self-defens e irrelevant an d eve n suspec t i n muc h feminis t theor y an d activism . O f course , i t would see m tha t self-defens e woul d fit righ t int o feminists ' fights fo r bodil y autonomy an d independenc e fro m mal e "protection. " Certainl y i t doe s fo r some; ye t unde r th e prevailin g politica l framework, w e canno t a s easily imag ine the female bod y a s an agent for socia l change. Further, women' s bod y issue s are s o highl y charge d tha t som e fea r an y bod y wor k tha t wome n d o wil l inevitably lea d t o eithe r a n oppressiv e bodil y discipline , a naiv e wa y o f con struing wh y an d ho w a woman ha s a right t o bodil y integrity , o r a n uncritica l privileging o f sexuality a s a natural essenc e tha t define s wh o w e are . If feminists hav e bee n skeptica l o f women's interes t i n strengt h training , o r the intensive commitmen t an d bodily master y required t o succee d in boxing o r the martial arts, then i t is perhaps because they fear that this kind o f regime con strues the bod y a s a tool requirin g intensive disciplin e an d trainin g (i n this case, if no t fo r beaut y the n fo r self-defense) . O n th e basi s o f thei r readin g o f Fou cault, som e feminist s ma y b e skeptica l o f th e disciplin e wome n subjec t them selves to i n orde r t o ge t i n shape , practice martia l arts , and s o forth—as thoug h all discipline subordinate d them . But Foucaul t claime d no t tha t disciplin e i s oppressio n t o b e eradicate d through resistanc e but rathe r tha t discipline is a possible procedure o f power (i n Rabinow 1984 , 380) . No t al l relation s o f disciplin e ar e necessaril y relation s o f domination. Ther e ca n b e consensua l discipline s (i n ibid.) . Certainl y th e prid e

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 16 3 that wome n find i n thei r contro l ove r finely tune d bodie s ca n exhibi t th e lib eral values o f self-proprietorship, whic h man y feminist s criticiz e a s masculinist , for exampl e i n th e femal e athleti c revolutio n (se e Twi n 1979) . ( I argu e i n th e next section s tha t th e meanin g of self-proprietorship changes whe n wome n clai m its entidements. ) Feminist s hav e suggeste d tha t women' s physica l activities , even i f seemingly empowering , stil l connec t thei r self-wort h t o bod y manage ment (Col e 1994 , 16) . Feminist s hav e worke d agains t th e shapin g o f women' s bodies t o th e figurative ideal , an d wan t t o hav e "real " bodies . The proble m i s tha t al l "real " bodie s ar e t o som e exten t imaginar y con structions (Gaten s 1996) . We al l have t o hav e som e fantasize d definitio n o f th e body—there i s n o "real " bod y underneat h th e fantasize d imag e o f th e body . This i s not t o sa y that a woman ca n thin k hersel f ou t o f breast cancer , bu t i t i s to say that we mus t alway s have a n idea o f the body when w e deplo y it or con strain i t alon g certai n dimensions . Fro m thi s vantag e point , boxin g an d karat e are n o more , an d n o less , disciplinary tha n yog a o r dancing . A cultura l for m o f body that results through gu n use or martial arts training is no less "natural" tha n any othe r mor e commo n cultura l form s o f bodily comportmen t wome n migh t take u p (o r tha t tak e up , an d mak e up , women) . A s I suggested , femininit y includes th e internalize d bodil y etho s o f rap e culture , whil e self-defens e train s women t o internalize a different bodil y etho s in reaction t o rap e culture. Ther e is n o bodil y demeano r devoi d o f culture . Withou t a discipline d bod y project , one canno t b e effectivel y subversiv e o r conformis t (Gros z 1994 , 144) . I n othe r words, systems of corporeal productio n pe r s e are not oppressive , a s many fem inists appea r t o assume . But perhap s feminist s worr y tha t self-defens e a s a bod y projec t doe s no t escape th e all-too-familia r relationshi p wome n hav e ha d wit h thei r bodie s (aside from tha t o f se x object) : tha t o f craf t objec t (Smit h 1988 , 48) . Wome n already kno w tha t w e mus t wor k a t ou r bodies , hair , skin , an d face s t o b e acceptable. Man y wome n tr y s o muc h t o loo k mor e lik e somethin g o r some one else , comparin g themselve s wit h th e lates t popula r idea l imag e (ibid. , 48 49). Men' s bod y project s see m les s loaded . W e ten d no t t o questio n men' s motivations whe n the y tak e u p physica l activity . Women , however , mus t con tend with th e fac t tha t the y hav e alway s viewed thei r bodies a s objects o f work . Courses that fuse aerobic s with self-defense , lik e Boxing for Fitnes s and Car dio Combat , combin e a traditional motiv e o f the bod y a s craft: object wit h th e body a s fighting agent . Th e aerobic s studio' s descriptio n o f Cardi o Comba t boasts, "Elevate your hear t rat e to it s target zon e whil e learnin g how t o knock out an y targe t tha t enter s your zone. " Glamour magazine's photo s fo r a n articl e on women' s boxin g d o no t displa y a female boxe r bu t a skinny mode l wearin g

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a lon g blac k dres s an d boxing gloves , leanin g lisdessl y agains t th e ropes i n the boxing ring , facin g no t a woman o r a man but a kangaroo. W h o know s wha t kin d o f bodily sensibilit y wil l prevai l fo r an y given stu dent? Wome n tak e aerobic s fo r man y reasons , no t alway s t o craf t themselve s into appealin g object s fo r men . Aerobics i s a place tha t wome n gathe r t o d o physical activit y i n a n upliftin g environment . Exercis e itsel f i s no t ba d o r oppressive. Self-defens e ca n transfor m it s purpose . Self-defens e rework s th e body-self in a way that enable s its expansion int o th e world rathe r tha n it s constriction. M y hope i s that w e might se e self-defense a s infiltrating aerobics , not the othe r wa y around. On e woman I interviewed tol d m e that sh e had always wanted t o lear n karat e fo r self-defens e bu t coul d no t affor d th e fee . Sh e belonged t o Gold's Gym , which offere d a Boxing for Fitness class. She loved it, and wen t o n to join a boxing gy m and become a n instructor . Some feminists suppor t women' s bodily transformatio n throug h self-defens e but remain skeptical of women's use of firearms, partly because they assume tha t firearms fai l to transform th e body i n ways that padde d attacke r an d martial art s courses do . A s I mentione d i n chapte r i , Grant' s (1989 ) instructiona l self defense videotap e dismisse s guns as, like male protectors, "outsid e the woman." Yet I have suggeste d tha t eve n a firearm transform s women' s bodil y comport ment, sinc e wome n hav e bee n associate d wit h a n inability t o maste r technol ogy, an d to handle gun s specifically , sinc e gun s have been associate d wit h mas culine power , an d sinc e th e learnin g proces s i s muc h th e sam e a s other self defense forms . Fo r the body i s capable o f prosthetic synthesis , an d the gun is a device tha t enable s th e bod y t o transfor m it s environment . Incorporatin g objects int o th e body's own spaces can augment it s powers and capacities. Suc h objects, "whil e external , ar e internalized, adde d to , supplementing an d supplemented b y th e 'organi c body ' (o r what culturall y passe s fo r it) , surpassing th e body, not 'beyond' natur e but in collusion with a 'nature' that never really lived up t o its name" (Gros z 1994 , 188) . Lentz (1993 , 384 ) still suggests that the discourse o f Women and Guns as well as Quigley' s Armed and Female positions wome n a s essentially vulnerable , th e gun allowin g wome n t o transcen d tha t essentia l vulnerability . Lent z suggest s that i f women naivel y accep t thei r bodie s a s naturally passiv e an d ineffective , then thei r us e of a firearm wil l no t affect thei r understandin g o r experienc e o f their bodies . Sh e assumes tha t wome n wh o underg o firearms trainin g feel , o r are positione d as , essentially vulnerable . However , Quigle y wa s careful i n her class neve r t o describ e wome n a s innately anything, muc h les s essentiall y vul nerable. Moreover , al l the gu n instructor s I spok e wit h recommende d othe r forms o f self-defense fo r certain type s o f threat a s part o f an overal l self-protec -

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tion strategy . Lentz' s clai m i s ill-founded ; instructor s d o no t recommen d firearms fo r self-protectio n ou t o f a belief tha t wome n ar e simpl y biologicall y wired fo r passivit y o r ineptitude . Linked t o th e assumptio n tha t gun s ar e no t transformativ e i s the worr y tha t women wil l think tha t all they need is a gun, and thus will never develop a fem inist consciousness . Fo r example , An n Jones (1994 , 44 ) cautions , "Pleas e don' t mistake your hardwar e fo r power. " Lent z (1993 , 395 ) argues tha t women's gu n culture avoid s socia l critiqu e becaus e sh e suppose s tha t arme d wome n assum e that havin g a gun mean s the y d o no t nee d a cultural critique . Thi s ignore s tha t women us e firearms i n the contex t o f the possibility o f their ow n victimization , and o f thei r statu s a s taboo fo r women . Thing s w e d o becaus e o f ou r oppres sion ca n resul t i n a feeling o f empowerment. Powe r i s complex. Certainl y gun s do no t provid e femal e equalit y o r power ; bu t thi s i s no reaso n t o avoi d them . Moreover, i f a change o f body reall y is a change o f mind, a s I have argued , the n to a grea t exten t havin g a gu n i s havin g a critique . Feminis t skepticis m o f women's bodil y activitie s i s ofte n roote d i n th e notio n tha t powe r operate s through th e body . W e hav e neglected , however , th e wa y powe r i s als o con tested throug h th e body . A s such , i t follow s tha t th e bod y ca n an d perhap s should b e disciplined . Th e ide a tha t bodil y engagemen t someho w stand s in th e way o f critical , menta l engagemen t i s part o f a much broade r assumptio n o f a mind-body dualis m i n Wester n philosoph y an d culture .

Mind-Body Dualism Feminists' skepticis m abou t women' s physica l aggressio n ma y hav e t o d o wit h the age-ol d associatio n o f wome n wit h th e bod y (immanence ) an d me n wit h the min d (transcendence) . Simon e d e Beauvoi r (1952 ) suggeste d tha t wome n will no t b e fre e unti l the y ar e n o longe r closel y boun d t o thei r bodies . I n con trast, Paxto n Quigle y likene d women' s gu n trainin g t o women' s entranc e int o primarily mal e occupations . Sh e aske d me , "Wh y shouldn' t a woma n kno w how t o us e a handgun, just becaus e i n th e pas t it' s bee n basicall y a male thing ? Women striv e t o b e doctors , lawyers , etc . an d thos e hav e basicall y bee n male oriented, s o why no t striv e t o lear n ho w t o shoo t a handgun?" I t ma y b e tha t some feminist s hesitat e t o associat e women' s emancipatio n wit h corporea l acts . Yet thi s hesitatio n itsel f relie s o n a dualis m o f min d an d bod y tha t w e migh t profitably reject . John Lock e an d John Stuar t Mill have bequeathed t o u s an understanding o f agency tha t exclude s th e body . Th e bod y i n libera l individualis t discours e

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recedes int o a passiv e objec t ove r whic h th e agen t ideall y ha s sovereignt y (Cohen 1991 , 77-78; Dipros e 1994 , 3) . Thi s explain s wh y feminist s hav e ru n extensive campaign s involvin g th e contro l o f women's bodies . Feminist s hav e insisted tha t peopl e (an d ofte n me n specifically ) mus t loo k a t an d ac t upo n th e female bod y differently . Consisten t wit h th e libera l paradig m o f self-propri etorship, feminists struggl e over the body's inhabitant o r owner an d its exploite r or appropriator . Thi s perpetuate s a mind-body dualis m (Gros z 1994 , 9). Simi larly, i n ou r debate s abou t whethe r gende r pattern s ar e roote d i n "nature " o r "nurture," bod y o r mind , w e reproduc e a dualis m that , eve n i f we sid e wit h culture over nature as the determining force, winds up dehistoricizin g the body . The bod y an d cultur e ar e not i n opposition . Rather , th e body i s yet anothe r compelling an d importan t expressio n o f cultura l norm s an d ideologies . Ye t some feminist s hav e trie d t o ge t awa y from th e vie w o f gende r a s dee p insid e one's body , a natura l o r inbor n essence , throug h a de-emphasi s o f th e bod y altogether. Bu t th e bod y i s significant, althoug h no t i n th e patriarcha l sense ; i t is a site o f cultura l significations , a place wher e patriarch y i s embodied , i n th e flesh, an d contested , i n th e flesh. This is not t o sa y that th e notion s o f agency o r consciousnes s ar e bad o r use less. They must , however , acknowledg e th e primac y o f corporeality. A centra l implication fo r feminis t theor y i s tha t consciousness— a categor y o f inferior ity—is usefu l onl y i f figured i n a way tha t include s th e primac y o f corporeality . Rather tha n seein g th e bod y a s something tha t i s irrelevan t t o politica l trans formation, o r relevan t a s an objec t only , feminist s migh t se e the bod y a s something tha t i s politically relevan t an d need s t o b e change d alon g wit h attitudes , beliefs, an d values . All ideologies of identity are ritually enacted. I t is true that we live in a world in whic h publi c text s suc h a s films, advertisements , an d fair y tale s mediate dis courses o f gender . Bu t thes e textuall y mediate d ideologie s mus t stil l b e ritual ized s o tha t th e meaning s the y hav e fo r u s actuall y becom e par t o f u s an d fee l real. Ideologie s o f masculinity an d femininit y ma y circulat e throug h visua l an d other images/icons, but the y ar e felt rea l through thei r ritualized enactment . A s I hav e shown , self-defens e training—specificall y th e discipline d reorganizatio n of one's bodil y comportment—amount s t o a ritual undoin g o f femininity . Feminists have focused les s on ho w th e body migh t be a source o f new con sciousness—in short , o n th e bod y a s somethin g othe r tha n a passive hous e o f the soul . Th e bod y i s not just somethin g tha t get s acte d on , take n over , occu pied, constrained , o r defended . Feminist s migh t conceiv e th e body a s an agent , not just th e thin g tha t (psychical ) agent s struggle ove r (Gros z 1994 , 9). Dipros e (1994, 104 ) offer s thi s understanding : "I t i s no t s o muc h tha t th e individua l

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 16 7 stands above his or her body in appreciation o f its social significance an d in con trol o f it s capacitie s bu t tha t th e capacitie s o f th e body , it s habits , gesture s an d style, make u p wha t th e sel f is in relatio n t o th e socia l an d materia l world. " Self-defense ca n encourag e feminist s t o rethink th e mind-body dualis m so as to incorporat e th e bod y no t a s th e basi s o f gende r o r socia l norm s an d no t a s what societ y i s reducibl e to , bu t a s part an d parce l o f subjectivity . I f feminist s are t o recogniz e th e perso n a s a corporeal being , an d ye t avoi d th e reduction ism o f traditiona l understanding s (understanding s tha t rationalize d removin g a woman's uteru s afte r labelin g he r hysterical) , the n w e mus t refigur e th e rela tionship betwee n consciousnes s an d th e body . But som e feminist s d o rejec t th e mind-bod y dualism , an d rejec t women' s self-defense o n th e grounds tha t it perpetuates tha t very dualism . After he r expe rience in a Model Muggin g course , Shanno n Jackson (1993 , 116 ) argued that , i n teaching women boundary-settin g skills , self-defense instructor s "leav e unques tioned a liberal ideology o f Western individualism , a n ideolog y tha t work s ver y hard to assur e its practitioners o f the possibility and th e desirabilit y o f [a conception o f self as a container]." Based o n a n argumen t tha t individualis m promote s an atomistic self-containment and , ultimately, th e withdrawal from other s or th e manipulative control of them, Jackson (ibid. ) insists that such self-defense course s "teach a woman t o enforce he r own policy of containment" a s "an unquestione d right of the individual." O f course, we ar e not reall y self-contained an d the prin ciple o f bodily self-determinatio n i s founded o n th e transhistorica l "fact " o f ou r biological statu s a s discret e individual s (Woodhul l 1988 , 174) . Th e bod y i s a politically regulate d boundary , no t a "being" (Butle r 1990 , 139) . While I agre e wit h th e analysi s tha t individualis m ha s actuall y benefite d white me n a t th e expens e o f othe r groups , m y stud y o f women' s self-defens e points t o way s in which Jackson's conclusion s ar e shortsighted. Libera l individ ualism claims to represent th e rights of individuals but actuall y excludes wome n (Woodhull 1988 , 172) . The ver y conceptio n o f the bod y a s a bounded entit y i s the precondition fo r ou r notions of political rights and ideal citizenship: Whole ness, integrity, mora l soundness, an d honor ar e all connected (Gaten s 1996 , 41). In popular an d classica l logic, women's bodie s ar e unfit fo r citizenship , becaus e they ar e no t bounde d entitie s th e wa y men' s are . Th e femal e bod y i n ou r cul ture ha s bee n understoo d an d ofte n live d a s an envelope , vessel , o r receptacl e (ibid.). O f cours e men' s bodie s ar e no t an y mor e naturall y enclose d tha n women's; no r ar e women' s an y mor e naturall y penetrabl e tha n men's . C o n ceptions o f male an d femal e embodimen t ma y b e live d an d understoo d i n thi s way, but onl y due t o thei r fit in a social and political context . Civi l society doe s not reflec t natura l differences , i t create s the m (ibid. , 79 , 83) .

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Women lac k th e privileg e o f the individua l becaus e the y ar e not see n a s full citizens (whic h ar e conceived a s males). Liberalism's idea l of self-determinatio n has been use d b y feminist s t o clai m a right t o bodil y contro l an d self-determi nation fo r women . I f wome n ar e learnin g t o enac t an d enforc e a possessiv e individualism, i t is because they , unlik e privilege d men , neve r wer e allowe d t o have it . Wome n hav e bee n see n a s propert y rathe r tha n a s proprietors . A s MacKinnon (1989 , 172-73 ) notes , "women' s sexualit y is , socially, a thing t o b e stolen, sold , bought, bartered , o r exchange d b y others . But wome n neve r ow n or posses s it , an d me n neve r trea t it , i n la w o r i n life , wit h th e solicitud e wit h which the y trea t property . T o b e propert y woul d b e a n improvement. " And, besides, women ar e processed in cour t no t a s bourgeois individuals bu t as possibly vindictiv e an d masochisti c feminin e subject s (Inne s 1976 , 25) . W e should b e strivin g for th e eradicatio n o f the conflic t wome n no w fee l betwee n femininity an d bourgeoi s equa l citizenship . Women , bein g construe d a s objects, no t agents , i n a (male ) searc h fo r morality , truth , ideas , an d meanin g (whether tha t is transcendental o r animalistic), are not eve n see n as moral agent s that coul d be violated. Wome n ar e not suppose d t o want o r need self-determi nation. (Or , if they are, it is supposed t o be the desire for al l the things men hav e wanted fo r women—evidence d b y forme r U.S . Vic e Presiden t Da n Quayle' s statement, "[M y wife ] ha s a very majo r caus e an d a very majo r interes t tha t i s a very comple x an d consumin g issu e wit h her . An d that' s me " [quote d i n Star r 1991, 176]. ) Thu s t o insis t on one' s mora l integrity an d boundedness i s to clai m a statu s equa l t o men—th e wa y the y hav e construe d wha t i t mean s t o b e a n individual wit h rights. For men's sexua l violence i s one o f the consequence s o f civil society's grant ing onl y me n th e statu s o f individual s wit h inviolabl e boundaries . Afte r all , i f the mal e bod y ha s historicall y bee n understoo d an d live d a s bounde d an d impenetrable bu t th e femal e bod y ha s bee n see n a s a n incomplet e receptacle , then women' s bodie s ca n b e seen , an d treated , a s full o f holes tha t requir e fill ing—which, sadly , rationalize s men' s attempt s t o "complete " th e femal e bod y and render s nonsensica l women' s desire s fo r bodil y self-determinatio n (Gaten s 1996, 42). From thi s perspective, dismissin g self-defense ha s at least a s many o f the problem s o f possessive individualis m tha t embracin g i t has . Women chang e the meaning of possessive individualism by forcefully inhab iting tha t subjec t position . Whe n wome n deman d th e rights trumpete d b y a social an d lega l syste m grounde d i n possessiv e individualism , demandin g con trol ove r thei r body-selves , the y deman d tha t me n sto p treatin g the m a s men' s property. Thu s demandin g women' s rights t o protec t thei r bodil y boundarie s does conceptualiz e th e bod y a s the propert y o f an individua l self . I n thi s sense ,

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 16 9 defending self-defens e doe s no t entirel y transfor m th e term s o f liberal posses sive individualism , bu t i t doe s challeng e it s masculine slant . Self-defenser s d o not reinscrib e libera l individualis m but , ultimately , undermin e i t fro m th e inside. Patriarcha l expectation s an d circumstance s d o no t allo w wome n t o b e bounded, self-containe d individuals ; during self-defense training , many wome n find tha t the y hav e learne d (o r had ) t o b e to o cooperativ e an d to o worrie d about alienatin g others . Thus t o worr y abou t women' s spreadin g individualis m an d it s presume d dangers o f unbridled competitio n an d atomistic self-containmen t becaus e the y practice self-defens e seem s backward . Th e meanin g o f libera l individualis m cannot sta y th e sam e whe n wome n deman d it s privileges . Tha t som e self defensers fee l thei r abilit y an d willingnes s t o fight mak e the m bette r citizen s indicates tha t possessiv e individualis m an d community nee d no t be understoo d as mutually exclusive . Self-defensers fight fo r their entitlemen t t o freedom fro m coercive constraint—hardl y a leap int o manipulative , controlling , o r alienatin g antisocial practices . Women' s self-defens e i s entirel y compatibl e wit h socia l well-being an d cooperative interdependence . Although self-defens e ma y appea r t o b e th e enforcemen t o f one' s bodil y boundaries an d the reification o f the sel f as a container, suc h a practice extend s women's spher e o f effective liberty . Indeed , I found tha t self-defenser s ar e not becoming increasingl y "contained. " Th e fea r o f rap e result s i n containment , while women' s self-defens e trainin g result s i n a n expansion . Wome n begi n t o use their bodies differently , g o more places , and have les s fear o f private spaces , public spaces , an d men. Such femal e entitlement , a convergence o f self, body , and world , i s not containmen t bu t self-extensiveness (Brow n 1991 , 196). Selfdefense afford s wome n increase d mobilit y an d an expanded sens e o f self. Women's aggressiv e protectio n o f their bodies , then , i s less a naive retrea t into possessive individualism tha n an entitlement t o greater agency, social space, and mobility . I t i s an insistenc e o n women' s statu s a s equal citizens , a s body selves rathe r tha n a s body-things ownabl e b y others . Wome n wh o lear n self defense d o no t an d canno t preten d t o lear n i t a s gender-free subjects . I n thi s way, the y d o not embrac e th e illusory gender-fre e subjec t o f individualist dis course, one that privileged me n without admittin g it. Moreover, women' s self defense addresse s a collective , no t individual , problem , on e tha t th e state , despite it s claim s t o represen t individual s regardles s o f sex (Woodhul l 1988 , 175), has not solved . Despite her problems wit h th e discourse o f self-defense, Jackson (1993 ) doe s not offe r a new way to construe th e harm o f rape and the power o f self-defense , or an y new metaphors fo r understanding th e body, th e self, an d the individua l

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who claim s th e right t o defen d hersel f from attack . I want t o offe r a politicall y and philosophicall y informe d wa y t o experienc e an d understan d self-defense , however troublin g som e o f th e assumption s o f an y individua l self-defense r o r self-defense cours e ma y b e a t present . As I have alread y noted, Lent z (1993 ) suggest s that self-defense place s a new, uncritical emphasi s on th e harm o f rape, by making it seem as though wha t sex uality mean s t o u s is apparent, tha t sexua l acts are naturall y important , an d tha t women hav e sacre d inne r violabl e spaces . Thi s suggest s tha t self-defens e i s th e chagrined acceptanc e o f a primal predator-pre y relationship , wome n swallow ing whol e thei r statu s a s victims an d men' s statu s a s naturally powerful . A t th e same time , other s ma y fea r tha t self-defens e wil l hav e th e effec t o f minimizing the politica l o r psychologica l impac t o f rape , renderin g i t aki n t o gettin g punched i n th e stomach . Thoug h rap e i s no t th e onl y for m o f gender-moti vated violence self-defensers prepar e to resist, these worries should prompt fem inists to mak e explici t th e politica l reasons why rap e i s wrong, locatin g ou r dis agreement wit h i t no t i n idea s o f the purit y o f the femal e bod y o r th e sanctit y of (consensual ) sexuality , bu t i n th e politic s o f social sexing .

The Harm of Rape With th e phrase "th e persona l is political" th e women' s movemen t o f the earl y 1970s effectivel y politicize d apparentl y nonpolitica l experience . "Th e ke y instance o f this, which generate d campaigns , actions , and the n debate s an d the ories, lik e th e spoke s leadin g ou t from th e centra l poin t i n a wheel , wa s th e woman's body " (Mulve y 1989 , xii). I n thi s light, i t shoul d hardl y b e surprisin g that for North American feminism, rap e became symbolic of the injury o f patriarchy. Rap e ha s been crucia l t o th e developmen t o f feminist practice , feminis t theory, an d feminist jurisprudence. Rosalin d Inne s (1976 , 23) captures the fem inist representatio n o f rape: Rape i s the ultimat e ac t o f sexism. Rape i s the suprem e assertio n o f masculinity. Rap e i s a mechanism fo r th e socia l contro l o f women. Rap e i s normal heterosexua l intercours e strippe d o f it s ideologica l veneer s o f "love" an d "equality. " Rap e i s a young girl' s entranc e int o femininity . Rape i s the weapo n use d t o maintai n tha t femininity . Th e Rap e o f On e woman i s the Rap e o f All women . Rape, i n bein g positione d an d use d a s the ultimat e ac t an d symbo l o f mal e domination, ha s inadvertendy bee n construe d a s almost ahistorical , monolithic ,

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 17 1 and, a s such, seemingl y unstoppabl e (ibid.) . Of cours e suc h view s were impor tant fo r counterin g th e "rap e myths " tha t wome n woul d reall y rela x an d enjo y men's force d sex , an d tha t variou s women—dependin g o n thei r curren t socia l context, marita l status , prior relatio n t o th e rapist , patter n o f drug use , occupa tion, an d dres s style—reall y deserve d t o b e force d int o sex , o r tha t th e forc e should no t actuall y b e considere d a s such . Bu t eve n th e feminis t vie w ha s it s problems i n tha t i t give s " a simpl e visio n o f th e oppressio n o f wome n a s on e ultimately determine d b y biologica l differences " (ibid. , 24) . Suc h a vie w als o slips int o a simplistic , conspiratoria l notio n o f rape . H o w d o w e constru e th e harm o f rap e i n a wa y tha t avoid s essentializin g narrative s an d a mind/bod y dualism? Women wan t t o avoi d rap e becaus e the y thin k rap e i s wrong: It' s immoral , unethical, sinful , painful , mean , ugly , humiliating , traumatizing , an d just plai n bad. Wome n ma y us e man y differen t construction s o f womanhood, sexuality , and crim e t o explai n wh y i t hurt s an d anger s them . Fo r instance , a woma n might perceiv e th e har m o f rap e accordin g t o traditional , outdate d law s tha t construe he r as the precious—and afte r a rape, soiled—property o f her husban d or father. Traditionally , rap e was seen as harmful becaus e on e man stol e anothe r man's property , o r becaus e innocen t virtu e wa s defiled . I n contrast , Dworki n (1987) argue s tha t th e har m o f rap e lie s i n it s defea t o f a woman's struggl e fo r meaning and integrity. When a woman fo r whom se x is "part o f a human ques t for huma n solace , huma n kindness " get s raped , he r bod y i s take n over , he r integrity is challenged, he r privacy is compromised, an d her selfhood i s changed (ibid., 45 , 122-23) . Feminist antiviolenc e campaign s hav e ofte n conveye d th e har m o f rap e i n dualistic terms , a s thoug h th e mind-agen t los t contro l o f he r body-property . Certainly self-defensers , an d th e anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t mor e broadly , must clai m th e self-possessio n tha t ha s bee n denie d women . Self-possession , however, ca n b e a way o f relatin g t o one' s personhoo d a s a sel f with a body appendage, no t a s a n integrate d body-self . Th e realit y o f violenc e agains t women force s wome n t o enac t thi s mod e o f being-in-the-world . I n a n idea l world, o f course, women woul d no t nee d t o thin k o f their bodies as things the y must protect , whos e boundarie s mus t b e unde r thei r constan t surveillance . This i s precisely wh y rap e i s harmful an d wort h fighting against : I t reduce s a woman's mod e o f being-in-the-world fro m a n absorbed live d body t o a broken body wit h a self somewhere els e o r a self reduced t o a body-thing. Wome n ar e regarded b y me n wh o rap e (and , regrettably , b y man y others ) a s things, void o f a mora l wil l o r a body-self distinc t fro m th e rapist's , o r the y ar e reduce d t o hi s (mis)interpretation: "Sh e reall y wants it." Rap e i s harmful becaus e i t imposes a n

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"ownable" status, effectively construin g woman a s passive and as property. Rap e imposes a sex-class status. As such sexual violence is politically important t o fight against. Foisting upon women a sex-class status may also help explai n other gen der-motivated attacks , such a s lesbian-bashing an d wife-beating . Our bodie s ar e the very fabri c o f our selves ; our social identitie s ste m fro m our corporea l histories ; an d "having " (sovereignt y over ) a body , rathe r tha n "being" a body, i s alienating (Merleau-Pont y 1962 ; Diprose 1994 , 108). Selfhood is changed when one' s body is forcibly beaten or raped. The outward pro jection o f self-identity wit h th e body become s constrained . Whe n on e is sick, the unifie d live d bod y become s a n object fo r reflectio n (Merleau-Pont y 1962 , 136). When on e is beaten o r raped, th e absorbed projectio n o f one's embodie d self becomes particularl y difficult , muc h lik e whe n on e is ill. The women' s movemen t ha s long been invested in possessive individualism . The woma n fo r who m feminist s struggl e i s a n individua l wh o i s capabl e o f being, and deserves not to be, violated. Thoug h rap e occur s in societies that are not capitalist , it s specific meanin g fo r Nort h America n women—a s a politica l weapon agains t women' s equality—take s plac e i n a capitalist contex t i n whic h the individua l i s an ideological construc t (Inne s 1976) . But the possessive indi vidualism self-defenser s clai m might forc e feminis m t o be a bit more corporeal . Sexuality an d it s "possession " ar e construct s o f mal e domination . N o woman, feminis t o r self-defenser, want s to find the meaning o f life in sexuality. Men's interes t i n i t an d entitlemen t t o acces s t o i t ar e par t o f the oppressiv e social sexing tha t wome n fight. Feminis t antirap e wor k i s not what turn s sexu ality int o somethin g prominent ; rap e is . Feminists canno t affor d t o give u p the primacy o f sexual violenc e befor e me n do . As Plaza (1981 , 32 ) states, "Wha t men—situated i n a patriarchal powe r relationship—persis t i n creating an d perpetuating (th e oppressio n o f women, th e 'differenc e betwee n th e sexes, ' th e primacy o f sex) the y imput e t o us as wanting t o create an d perpetuate." Though traditionall y see n a s a property o f individuals, sexualit y i s not som e natural essence that is automatically important , o r automatically divide d as male and female . Sexualit y i s a regim e o f power tha t divide s peopl e an d provide s identities tha t produc e powe r relations . A t the same time , punishin g rap e a s if it wer e th e same a s being punche d i n the face wil l hav e t o wait unti l tha t i s all it mean s t o me n (ibid.) . Self-defens e fro m a feminis t perspectiv e doe s no t diminish th e political meanin g o f rape; i t highlight s it . At the same time , self defense fro m a feminist perspectiv e doe s not solidify o r falsely naturaliz e rap e or sexuality. As MacKinno n (1989 , 174 ) point s out , mos t attempt s t o explai n wha t i s wrong about rap e start with what is right about sex : "Perhaps the wrong o f rape

Changing Our Minds about Our Bodies | 17 3 has prove d s o difficul t t o defin e becaus e th e unquestionabl e startin g poin t ha s been tha t rap e is defined a s distinct fro m intercourse , whil e fo r wome n i t is difficult t o distinguis h th e tw o unde r condition s o f mal e dominance. " I f mos t rapes are not see n a s violative o f women, i t is because se x and violence ar e see n as mutually exclusiv e rathe r tha n mutuall y definitiv e (ibid.) . We mus t politiciz e sex as well a s rape. Sexuality , no t just rape , proceeds withi n a context o f powe r relations. Acknowledging bodie s in feminist theorie s an d politics also means acknowl edging sex categories as constructed politically , rationalized in nature, and solid ified i n practice. Self-defense, a s part of an anti—sexual assault movement, politi cizes rap e a s wel l a s sexualit y mor e broadly . Ther e ar e reason s fo r arguin g against rape, for being feminists, an d for takin g self-defense t o prevent it s occur rence. Thes e reason s ar e n o les s compelling fo r bein g historica l an d cultural . Rape i s harmful no t onl y becaus e a man claim s sovereignt y ove r tha t whic h belongs to a sovereign woman—th e femal e bod y o r female sexuality . The bod y in feminis t theor y canno t stan d simpl y a s a n appendag e tha t wome n ideall y own. Rap e i s a violation no t simpl y because a woman los t sovereignty ove r thi s thing, bu t becaus e th e bod y i s a form o f socia l expressio n an d rap e make s th e woman's body into an object o r possession o f the rapist rather than a lived body . Social identit y i s th e body-self . A broke n bod y i s th e collaps e o f one' s socia l expressiveness (Schnec k 1986 , 51) . Rap e turn s a n "ope n embodie d engage ment" int o a n embodimen t a s sexual objec t fo r men' s us e (Dipros e 1994 , 113) . Thus, a woman doin g wha t sh e ca n t o sto p a sexual assaul t migh t no t nec essarily solidif y he r identit y a s a bourgeoi s libera l individua l wh o possesse s a body-thing but rathe r a s an expandin g body-self who i s willing to fight i n orde r not t o b e s o sexed , i n orde r no t t o b e mad e femal e mad e flesh. I n thi s sense , self-defense i s as much a war o f social realities as a war protecting bodily bound aries. I n activel y employin g he r bod y t o resis t bein g mad e int o a n objec t fo r another's abuse , th e self-defense r undermines , rathe r tha n solidifies , th e mind body dualism . Women's bodie s hav e bee n construe d a s vessel s fo r babie s an d penises . I n contrast, men' s bodies have been understoo d t o hav e a wholeness an d integrity , which make s i t easie r t o se e mal e citizen s a s whole being s wh o posses s mora l soundness an d integrit y (Gaten s 1996 , 41). This differentia l conceptio n o f mal e and femal e bodie s contribute s t o th e greate r degre e o f outrage tha t th e rap e o f a ma n generates . Whe n self-defenser s fight agains t rape , the y ar e fighting fo r a status usuall y accorde d onl y t o men . Self-defens e i s a fight fo r integrit y an d wholeness, an d rejects th e statu s of the femal e bod y a s a vessel or receptacle tha t is incomplete withou t a man o r a baby. Tha t self-defens e mus t perpetuate som e

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of the very same notions o f the possessed individual tha t men' s violence agains t women doe s is no reason to reject it. A theory o f the harm of rape can help self defense dismand e th e possessive individualis m tha t ha s guarded mal e privilege . Self-defense i s an attempt t o refuse th e imposition o f the possesse d statu s of womanhood, t o fight fo r a different visio n o f self, o f sexuality, o f relationship, of the body. Thu s self-defenser s ar e fighting rap e no t onl y t o obtai n th e freedom o f liberal individualism— a freedom from interferenc e from other s an d a rightful ownershi p o f their bodies—but t o fight for the freedom t o structure the world as an absorbed lived body. This is a freedom no t so much for an increased number o f choices but for an enhanced wa y of being a person i n the world . We liv e i n a tim e i n whic h a portio n o f th e bod y discours e involve s a rhetoric o f self-determination an d choice. Coul d thi s rhetori c o f the "democ ratic body " (Col e 1994 , 16-17) , combine d wit h th e increasin g popularit y o f body project s i n contemporar y Wester n society , wor k i n th e servic e o f women's emancipation ? Rap e an d battery ar e body project s no t of democrac y or democrati c bodie s but of male dictatorship . Women nee d body project s tha t discipline thei r bodie s i n self-consciousl y transgressiv e ways . Self-defens e i s a disciplined bod y projec t tha t refine s an d enhances women' s claim s o n huma n rights conceive d withi n th e framework o f possessive individualism .

Conclusion A serie s o f interrelate d assumption s ha s kep t feminist s from embracin g self defense a s an important strateg y for challenging male domination : th e legacy of cultural feminism, it s related debate s over power and sexuality, which spil l ove r into controversie s abou t wha t kin d o f womanhood i s resistant, wha t kin d o f resistance i s feminist, ho w to resis t co-optation , ho w to avoi d increasin g vio lence, an d th e conceptua l distinctio n betwee n min d an d bod y i n whic h women's physica l activitie s ar e suspecte d o f no t transformin g thei r mind s o r political attitudes . Self-defense i s not only a body-conditioning regimen , bu t is simultaneously a social activity, materiall y and symbolically linke d t o others, all of which chal lenge rape culture . Of course, women's self-defens e ha s made som e impact, but it ha s yet to infiltrate socia l institution s a t large. I t is not taught widel y t o girls, say, i n publi c school s o r Sunda y schools . No r ha s it attracte d muc h attentio n from majo r feminis t writer s o r group s suc h a s the Nationa l Organizatio n fo r Women. Unti l i t does, it will not necessarily hav e th e chance t o spread, gener ate externa l funding , an d influence relate d policies .

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A chas m betwee n academi c feminis t an d self-defens e culture s coul d kee p self-defense fro m necessar y politica l self-reflection . Withou t a feminist under standing o f sexual violence, th e self-defens e movemen t i s likely t o perpetuat e a host o f rape myth s tha t feminist s hav e worke d har d t o brin g t o light , includin g myths tha t me n usuall y rap e strangers , tha t whit e wome n ar e th e primar y vic tims of rape, and that black men ar e the primary perpetrators o f rape. Fo r exam ple, t o explai n wh y wome n shoul d b e armed , Women and Guns magazin e employs a right-win g politica l discours e abou t th e welfar e state , th e lazy , th e poor, an d th e criminals— a rhetori c tha t easil y feed s racis t assumption s abou t who criminal s are. Former edito r Sonn y Jones (1990 , 6) states, "While th e anti gun, pro-crim e liberal s stud y huma n natur e an d th e politica l machin e suck s u p our hard-earne d mone y lik e a vacuu m cleane r possessed , onl y t o disgorg e i t directly into the hands of poor unfortunates wh o quickl y conver t it to drugs an d alcohol, w e th e peopl e ar e suppose d t o b e goo d worker s durin g th e da y an d willing victim s a t night. " The N R A i s supported b y man y wh o certainl y ar e no t feminist . The y ma y support women's self-defens e precisel y because the y believe the rape myths tha t women ar e incapabl e o f self-defens e withou t weapons . Or , the y ma y suppor t women's self-defens e withou t questionin g th e racis t (an d false ) assumptio n tha t the primar y proble m o f rap e cultur e involve s blac k mal e intruder s wh o rap e white women . Firearm s fo r self-defens e ma y mak e sens e t o som e o f those peo ple precisely because the y d o no t conside r whom wome n woul d hav e t o shoot . (The professiona l wome n wh o teac h wome n ho w t o shoot , however , believ e that a woman shoul d hav e the righ t t o self-defens e regardles s o f her relationshi p with th e perpetrator. ) Since gun s fo r self-defens e ar e usuall y intende d fo r us e i n case s o f strange r assault (where , unlik e o n a date, th e self-defense r ha s a chance t o ge t he r gun) , the onl y wa y tha t th e arme d self-defens e movemen t wil l avoi d feedin g racis t and sexist stereotypes woul d b e t o wor k closel y with othe r self-defens e subcul tures, lik e martia l art s o r padde d attacke r courses . Gu n instructor s Quigle y an d Bates d o recommen d padde d attacke r courses , notin g tha t unarme d technique s are appropriat e form s o f self-defens e fo r man y attac k situations . Thi s i s a n important reaso n fo r th e self-defens e communit y t o hav e a sense o f themselve s as a community, rathe r tha n a s groups competin g wit h on e anothe r o r arguin g with on e anothe r ove r whos e self-defens e cours e offer s th e bes t kin d o f pro tection. Moreover, Women and Guns, just lik e th e American Rifleman, glamorize s suc cess stories , ignorin g th e ver y painfu l emotion s an d financial drai n o f a lega l trial, both o f which ofte n resul t from killin g in self-defense. Glamorize d succes s

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stories migh t hav e a different effec t o n wome n tha n men , however , becaus e o f women's socialize d tendenc y t o worr y to o muc h abou t inflictin g pai n o n oth ers. Nevertheless , w e canno t ignor e th e fac t tha t Nort h America' s paramilitar y culture give s u s much t o worr y about. 6 Thi s worr y ma y contribut e t o feminis t skepticism ove r films lik e Aliens, i n whic h well-arme d wome n blas t alien s t o bits. Althoug h Sigourne y Weaver' s characte r doe s no t hav e militar y status , sh e wears fatigue s an d i s o n boar d wit h militar y members . Th e militar y imager y equates women' s empowermen t wit h nationalis m an d militaris m an d thu s dis turbs feminist s wh o migh t otherwis e enjo y th e spectacle . Bu t perhap s w e should remembe r tha t right-win g antifeminis t wome n ar e als o agains t celebra tions o f women i n th e military . I n an y case , women' s arme d self-defens e cul ture migh t bes t avoi d essentializing , racist , nationalis t trouble s i f it get s contex tualized withi n th e feminis t anti—sexua l assaul t movemen t an d merge s wit h other form s o f self-defense , providin g ever y self-defense r wit h a rang e o f options. If self-defens e instructio n incorporate s a variety o f trainin g regimen s an d a feminist understandin g o f sexualit y an d inequality , i t ha s a goo d chanc e o f becoming a new , explici t par t o f th e feminis t movement . Paradoxically , th e more feminist s distanc e themselve s fro m self-defens e culture , th e mor e likel y self-defense i s t o b e depoliticize d an d co-opted . Bu t closin g th e rif t betwee n feminism an d women's combativ e bodily practices will not be a n easy task. For , as I hav e shown , feminist s wil l hav e t o rethin k thei r ow n philosophica l an d political presumptions. I n th e nex t chapter , I discuss some specifi c way s a physical feminis m migh t impac t rap e culture , feminis t rap e preventio n an d educa tion efforts , an d feminis t reformation s o f self-defense law .

5 Physical Feminis m Implications for Feminist Activism

Chapter 3 showe d ho w th e combativ e bodil y practice s o f self defense disrup t th e embodie d etho s o f rape culture . Chapte r 4 suggeste d tha t self-defense prompt s feminist s t o reconceptualize women' s violen t resistanc e t o rape and battery, and the place of the body in feminist theory . This chapter con siders i n tur n ho w women' s self-defens e impact s rap e culture , rap e educatio n and prevention , self-defens e law , and feminist politic s an d theory mor e gener ally. Because th e accomplishment an d normalization o f rape depen d o n a fantasy of bot h mal e invulnerabilit y an d femal e helplessness , embracin g women' s capacity fo r violen t resistanc e migh t hav e a deterrent effec t o n mal e violence . Because rap e preventio n effort s hav e tende d t o positio n women' s violenc e a s impossible, distasteful , o r insignificant , embracin g women' s capacit y fo r vio lence open s u p a new set of possibilities fo r rape educatio n an d feminist politi cal symbols . Moreover, women' s self-defens e an d its transformation o f gender ideolog y might clas h wit h othe r effort s t o refor m self-defens e law , bringing t o a head a central tensio n i n feminis m betwee n "difference " an d "equality. " Finally , because self-defens e ha s such radica l potentia l fo r disruptin g rap e cultur e an d feminist activism , i t expose s th e need fo r a marriage o f theory an d practice, o f consciousness an d corporeality .

Consequences for Rape Culture The politics of male domination ar e embodied; mal e domination i s a social con struction inscribe d in the bodies of women an d men, thu s imposing itself as selfevident an d natural. Bu t this i s not as bleak a s it may sound, fo r self-defense a s physical feminis m disrupt s th e embodie d etho s o f rap e culture . Whe n self defensers rehears e an d enact ne w bodily dispositions , the y challeng e rap e cul-

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ture at its somatized core . As women embrac e their power to thwart assaults and interrupt a script o f feminine vulnerabilit y an d availability , the y challeng e th e invulnerability an d entitlemen t o f men and , by extension , th e inevitabilit y o f men's violenc e an d women's victimization . In embracin g th e pleasure s o f combat , wome n undermin e th e exclusiv e association betwee n masculinit y an d physica l aggression . Wome n wh o fight , box, and shoot enact a central performance o f manhood. By infiltrating a n arena that ha s enabled me n to solidif y a naturalized sens e o f raw an d physical mascu line prowess , wome n ceas e t o be merel y fought-ove r objects , prett y property , or th e one s behin d th e scenes nursin g th e male warriors . Notion s o f manlines s depend o n contrasting notion s o f womanliness. Hence , change s in what count s as a woman wil l greatl y impac t wha t count s a s a man. Men ca n so easil y believ e i n thei r superio r physica l strength— a strengt h s o much mor e powerfu l an d extreme tha n women's—becaus e aggressio n i s male turf. Cornerin g th e aggression marke t offer s a sense of natural superiority , eve n in th e face o f feminist gain s women make , fo r instance, in the workplace. Thi s quote fro m a thirty-two-year-old professiona l ma n is revealing: " A woman ca n do th e sam e job I can do—mayb e eve n b e m y boss. But I'l l be damne d i f she can g o out on the field and take a hit from [footbal l star ] Ronni e Lott " (Mess ner 1994 , 70-71). A sense o f physical superiorit y ove r women , i n a number o f ways but notably her e i n the way of strength, inform s man y men' s interaction s with women . O f course , th e man who sai d thi s probabl y can' t tak e a hit fro m Ronnie Lot t either , bu t the male-only natur e o f football allow s men , even th e scrawny, older , an d nonathletic ones , t o identif y wit h th e men o n th e footbal l field. Thi s belie f in a superior biolog y (eve n th e notio n o f superior strengt h is, conveniently, based on male-centered criteria ) rationalize s gender inequality, in fact i t rationalizes th e divisio n o f the sexe s itself . Given th e wa y violenc e agains t wome n reinforce s gende r norms , i t i s n o wonder tha t self-defenser s ar e ofte n see n a s a direct threa t o r challeng e t o th e gendered socia l order . Whethe r o r not they kno w i t or intend to , in challeng ing men' s physica l superiorit y ove r women , the y ar e challengin g gender . Th e social, moral, an d psychological boundarie s gende r norm s maintai n ar e directly threatened b y the self-defens e movement . A sens e o f physical superiorit y ove r women inform s man y men' s momen t t o momen t interaction s wit h women . This is why many me n feel uncomfortabl e aroun d stron g women; the y experi ence anxiet y when gende r arrangements , an d gender differenc e itself , ar e called into question , particularl y whe n th e aspec t o f gender unde r threa t i s th e on e that feels most real . Th e aggressiv e woma n ca n be experience d a s an affron t t o a fleshy sensibility .

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Clearly, tha t sensate d "knowledge " o f sex differences , particularl y se x dif ferences i n aggression, result s from socia l conventions concernin g violence . As Jeffner Alle n (1986 , 38) has argued, "Th e heterosexual virtue tha t dictates wha t is a woman als o prescribe s wha t i s violence. Violenc e i s defended a s the righ t to limi t life an d take life tha t is exercised b y men, for men and against women . A woman , b y definition , i s no t violent , an d i f violent , a femal e i s no t a woman." To o often , w e thin k onl y me n ar e entitle d t o hav e th e righ t an d responsibility o f giving an d taking life . Som e feminist s thin k thi s is why man y men ar e uncomfortabl e wit h a woman' s righ t t o abortion . I n an y case , thi s helps explai n wh y s o man y me n expres s discomfor t ove r th e possibilit y o f women's violence . In addition , me n know tha t wome n hav e reaso n t o be furious, s o allowin g women's aggressio n a s a society bring s wit h i t the scary possibility tha t wome n will seek revenge. Furthermore , me n might fea r a n inability to distinguish wha t is and is not offensive t o women, thu s fearing women' s aggression , a t least unti l they becom e comfortabl e wit h thei r respec t fo r women . Th e suppressio n o f women's aggressio n i s als o connecte d wit h a whol e hos t o f ideologie s man y people migh t no t wan t t o challenge : heterosexuality , capitalism , nationalism , and militarism. Perhap s anxietie s stem from a sense that women's self-defens e i s not recoverabl e throug h thes e ideologies . Self-defense, then , has a number o f components tha t can tear down rap e cul ture. The first potential impac t o n rape culture is that men may actually becom e too afrai d t o pounce . Marcu s (1992 , 396-97 ) suggest s tha t "directe d physica l action i s a s significan t a criterio n o f humanit y i n ou r cultur e a s words are. " Thus, an y move towar d constructin g wome n a s agents o f such actio n ough t t o have a n appreciable impac t o n the respect wit h whic h me n approach women . Second, me n will no t see violence (o r active sexuality ) a s male turf , an d so the gender identit y availabl e to them throug h violenc e migh t withe r away , makin g violence les s appealing . Third , sinc e wome n ar e suppose d t o b e th e one s t o keep the peace, and many fear tha t women's failur e t o hold out against violenc e will doo m society , decouplin g gende r an d violenc e migh t mak e me n mor e responsible fo r peace an d social harmony . Me n might becom e mor e responsi ble for their communitie s onc e wome n ar e taken ou t of their position a s moral guards o f the socia l order . Women' s aggressio n deconstruct s th e se x binaris m that revolve s aroun d aggression , debunkin g ye t another rap e myth . While som e feminists , Naom i Wol f (1993 , 156) , for instance , ar e offende d by othe r feminists ' declaratio n tha t al l men are emotionally capable , o r politi cally capable , o f rape, 1 mos t ten d t o believ e al l men ar e physically capabl e o f rape (a n idea tha t eve n Wol f feel s comfortabl e with) . Bu t feminist self-defens e

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challenges th e notio n tha t al l me n ar e physically capable o f rape . Finally , me n might no t se e penetrabilit y an d vulnerabilit y a s suitabl e onl y fo r female s an d "fags," thu s openin g u p possibilitie s fo r respectin g women' s boundarie s and , because self-defens e coul d mak e me n se e thei r ow n bodie s differently , tolerat ing varianc e i n mal e sexuality . Whe n se x i s denaturalized , manhoo d cease s t o be a fiction tha t me n mus t liv e ou t a s "real"; i t cease s t o b e th e myt h tha t the y must mak e true .

Old and New Symbols for Feminist Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Efforts Feminists hav e rightl y pointe d ou t th e man y way s i n whic h wome n ar e vic timized. Thi s ha s been a n effor t t o counte r prevailin g assumptions tha t wome n actually enjo y victimizatio n o r denia l o f th e proble m altogether . However , a s Wolf (ibid. , 36-37 ) ha s pointe d out , feminism' s negative , eve n gruesom e imagery, i s becomin g counterproductive . Instea d o f urgin g wome n t o vot e with ad s depicting women withou t mouth s (a s Lifetime T V did) , instead o f distributing hanger s fo r wome n t o carr y a t pro-choic e rallie s (a s N OW did) , an d instead o f encouragin g financial contribution s b y rewardin g donor s wit h bracelets engrave d wit h th e nam e o f Becky Bell , a teenage r wh o die d fro m a botched abortio n (a s th e Fun d fo r th e Feminis t Majorit y did) , th e women' s movement migh t mov e wome n b y appeal s t o women' s strength , resourceful ness, an d sens e o f responsibility . A ritual conducted o n Internationa l Women's Da y in 197 8 and at some Tak e Back th e Nigh t marche s attempte d t o celebrat e wome n wh o hav e fough t bac k (Kaye/Kantrowitz 1992 , 59-60) . Eight women donnin g white mask s each too k on th e voice o f a woman wh o ha d killed an abusive man: "M y nam e is . . . . My husband bea t m e fo r years . . . . I sho t him. " Th e grou p woul d the n chant , " I am a woman. I fough t back. " Man y feminis t activist s charge d th e grou p wit h "glorifying violence " (ibid.) . Why? Th e assumption s o f cultural feminis m hav e grounded women' s resistanc e in women's differenc e fro m men . Unfortunately , however, women' s victi m statu s is a significant wa y wome n ar e differen t fro m men an d a s such ha s become a n identity fo r feminis t activists . The ide a tha t an y kind o f violence i s bad als o turns th e celebratio n o f even specificall y self-defen sive violence into feminist taboo . Hence, it seemed t o make more sens e to fem inist activist s o n colleg e campuse s i n th e 1980 s t o pain t th e statemen t " A Woman Wa s Rape d Here " al l ove r sidewalk s an d streets . Increasin g publi c awareness, rallies, candlelight vigils , phone calls , lobbying for stiffe r sentencing ,

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and creatin g saf e house s ar e al l feminis t moves—an d wel l the y shoul d be . Bu t can't w e d o more ? Rape educatio n an d prevention program s hav e maintained som e o f the sam e assumptions abou t women' s nonviolenc e tha t ultimatel y win d u p solidifyin g men's aggressio n an d excludin g wome n fro m th e possibilit y o f aggressive self defense. A flye r o n avoidin g rap e issue d fo r wome n b y a college rap e preven tion educatio n progra m (RPEP ) suggest s t o wome n wh o ar e "no t gettin g through" ("No t Gettin g Through? " i s th e bold-fac e titl e lin e o f th e flyer) t o "say n o loudl y an d clearly. " Th e mos t extrem e suggestio n is , "Yell." Th e flyer does no t instruc t wome n t o twis t th e attacker' s testicles , kic k hi s kneecaps , o r gouge ou t hi s eyes . Th e Rap e Treatmen t Cente r o f Sant a Monic a Hospita l Medical Cente r distribute s a handout fo r us e o n colleg e campuse s calle d "Pre vention Information " wit h muc h th e sam e advice . To thei r credit , the y firs t lis t seven thing s me n ca n d o t o sto p acquaintanc e rape . Bu t thei r lis t o f strategie s for wome n include s n o self-defensiv e action . Th e mos t extrem e self-protectiv e measures the y suggest t o women are , "Stat e your feeling s an d ge t ou t o f the sit uation," "I f you sa y 'No,' sa y it like you mea n it, " an d "Us e campu s escor t ser vices." Other attempt s t o kee p wome n fro m bein g victimize d involv e controllin g or restricting women's behavior , a s if there wer e n o othe r option . Fo r instance , some colleg e campuse s stil l maintai n curfew s fo r women , whic h deman d tha t they retur n t o thei r dorm s earlie r tha n th e men . RPEP s o n colleg e campuse s intentionally tr y t o increas e women' s sens e o f victimization ; the y hav e eve n been evaluate d b y researcher s i n term s o f ho w successfull y the y instil l feeling s of vulnerabilit y i n wome n (see , e.g. , Gra y e t al . 1990 ; Hanso n an d Gidyc z !993)- Th e reasonin g behind thi s is based o n othe r studie s that hav e shown tha t the greate r one' s perception s o f vulnerabilit y t o danger , th e mor e on e wil l restrict one' s ow n "risk-taking " behaviors . This perspective see s women's basi c freedoms, whic h me n exercis e withou t even thinkin g o f the m a s privilege s (partyin g wit h buddies , hangin g ou t a t night, stayin g lat e a t th e librar y an d walkin g hom e afterward , playfull y kissin g someone withou t knowin g if he wants to "g o farther") , a s "risk-taking" behav iors that women shoul d avoid . What kin d o f freedom i s this? Those researcher s do no t conside r avoidin g self-defens e course s a s a "risk-takin g behavior" ; fo r they d o no t entertai n th e possibilit y o f respondin g t o a sens e o f vulnerabilit y with physica l training . Self-defens e i s no t considere d a behavio r tha t migh t decrease one' s likelihoo d o f being victimized . Even thoug h th e passag e o f the Violenc e Agains t Women Ac t (VAWA ) ha s channeled governmen t fund s towar d th e preventio n o f violence , thi s rarel y

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includes trainin g wome n fo r comba t wit h potentia l attackers—on e o f th e fe w prevention measure s tha t doe s no t restric t women' s behavior. 2 Th e VAWA , part o f Presiden t Clinton' s 199 4 crim e bill , combine s toug h federa l penaltie s with financial resource s channele d t o prosecuting offender s an d helpin g abuse d women. B y Octobe r 1996 , th e VAW A ha d provide d mor e tha n $13 0 millio n in federa l mone y fo r states t o trai n polic e an d prosecutor s an d t o assis t victim s of domestic violence an d rape (Campbel l 1996) . Related t o this legislation i s the creation o f the Nationa l Domesti c Violenc e Hotlin e an d th e Violenc e Agains t Women Offic e (whic h coordinate s th e federa l government' s effort s t o imple ment th e VAWA ) i n th e U.S . Departmen t o f Justice ; th e fundin g o f shelter s and crisi s centers ; th e fundin g o f effort s specificall y aime d a t protectin g olde r women fro m domesti c violence ; an d th e enhancemen t o f public lightin g sys tems. Th e VAW A direct s its resources t o educatin g police officers , prosecutors , and healt h an d socia l service providers ; providing mor e shelter s an d counselin g services fo r victim s o f domesti c violenc e an d rape ; prosecutin g offenders ; an d researching th e cause s o f violenc e agains t wome n an d educatin g th e publi c about it . The Offic e o f Justice Program' s Violenc e Agains t Wome n Grant s Offic e launched a grants program calle d S*T # 0 # P, whic h stand s for Services , Training , Officers, an d Prosecutors . Th e S»T # 0*P progra m obviousl y get s its name fro m the desir e t o sto p violenc e agains t women , bu t th e trainin g t o whic h i t refer s i s that o f police an d prosecutors , no t o f women fo r self-defense . I n fact , a s specified in the program's repor t fo r applicants , eac h state receiving a S - T»0 # P gran t must allocat e 2 5 percen t o f its funds t o la w enforcement , 2 5 percen t t o prose cution, an d 2 5 percen t t o nonprofit , nongovernmenta l victi m services . Onl y the remainin g 2 5 percen t ca n b e spen t th e wa y th e stat e chooses , withi n th e parameters specifie d b y th e VAW A unde r it s list o f purposes. A representativ e of the Grant s Offic e tol d m e tha t it does not disallo w a state's spending som e o f its discretionary gran t mone y o n self-defens e training . Suc h training , however , is no t eve n liste d a s on e o f th e purpose s o f th e program . Th e initiative s con nected wit h th e VAWA ar e important an d necessary ; but agai n what surface s i s the assumptio n tha t women' s self-defens e trainin g is impossible o r irrelevan t t o prevention efforts . Rape educatio n program s les s explicitl y confir m women' s helplessnes s b y focusing almos t exclusivel y o n men' s privilege d imperceptivenes s an d sexua l entitlement t o women . Fo r instance , Su t Jhally's (1990 ) widel y use d rap e edu cation video , Dreamworlds, show s ho w wome n ar e depicte d i n a n MT V mal e "dreamworld" wher e wome n ar e constantly sexuall y available and interested i n men, a fantasy tha t Jhally suggest s perpetuates rap e culture . Th e vide o intercut s

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scenes o f MT V roc k video s wit h scene s o f th e gan g rap e o f a woma n i n th e movie The Accused. The goa l o f suc h video s i s t o convinc e viewer s bot h tha t women ar e horribl y abuse d an d tha t popula r image s legitimiz e suc h abus e b y representing a s sexy the violence tha t man y men , bu t fe w women , see k in thei r sex lives . Bu t thes e video s perpetuat e a perceptio n o f me n a s dangerou s an d women a s victims wit h muc h t o fear . This approach terrorize s women an d increases their sense of helplessness an d responsibility fo r men' s violenc e agains t them . Jhally (1994 ) notes tha t his vide o scares women. H e eve n quote s a female student , wh o sai d tha t sh e wen t hom e and thre w ou t al l her cosmetic s afte r seein g Dreamworlds, t o indicat e th e "suc cess" o f his educationa l vide o (ibid. , 160) . Onc e agai n th e assumptio n surface s that wome n ar e responsibl e fo r keepin g me n fro m bein g intereste d i n rapin g them. Rap e educatio n video s tha t featur e "dangerou s men " d o littl e t o unset tle th e popula r fantas y o f superior strengt h tha t me n brin g t o thei r interaction s with women. Eve n i f this "dangerous men " approac h doe s reach men, i t mobi lizes them aroun d guil t o r empath y fo r "th e weake r sex, " no t aroun d th e kin d of respect wit h whic h me n kee p fro m attackin g othe r men . Me n tha t rap e an d beat women d o i t in part because the y thin k they'l l ge t away with it . I f research has show n tha t a n increase d sens e o f vulnerabilit y t o dange r lead s t o self imposed behaviora l restrictions , the n wh y aren' t w e increasin g men' s percep tions o f vulnerability t o dange r s o tha t they'l l restric t thei r abusiv e behavior ? Moreover, wh y no t subver t th e culturall y dominan t fantas y o f mal e invul nerability an d femal e passiv e sexua l availabilit y an d celebrat e alternativ e repre sentations o f womanhood? Suc h a celebration migh t expan d me n an d women' s awareness tha t th e bod y i s a n imagine d politica l construction , an d encourag e men t o imagin e tha t attemptin g violen t assaul t coul d brin g violen t conse quences. Wanting wome n t o b e abl e t o celebrat e image s o f their ow n heroism , and sometime s a fantasy o f the respec t an d eve n terro r tha t suc h herois m migh t inspire i n other s (particularl y powerfu l men) , m y colleagu e Nea l Kin g an d I developed a set of video clip s consisting of images o f women's verba l an d phys ical aggression against men. 3 Some o f the rape prevention educator s with who m we share d thi s vide o astonishe d u s wit h thei r hesitanc y t o us e thes e image s o f women cursing , clobbering , an d shootin g men . It seeme d a s thoug h th e image s o f men' s violenc e agains t wome n ha d become s o routin e tha t educator s reacte d wit h horro r onl y t o th e image s o f women's violenc e agains t men . Bu t o f course th e image s o f men's violenc e ar e horrifying; thi s is why rap e educator s us e them fo r rap e education , hopin g peo ple wil l becom e mor e critica l o f th e images . Ye t s o entrenche d ar e image s o f men's violenc e agains t wome n a s a feminis t symbo l tha t image s o f women' s

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violence ca n see m to o jarring . Feminist s ar e s o ambivalen t abou t women' s aggression (o r aggressio n i n general ) tha t eve n image s tha t spar k a rage fantas y appear t o b e dangerous , o r a t leas t politicall y incorrect . I t ha s become difficult to acknowledg e women' s aggressio n eve n a t th e leve l o f fantasy . Feminists an d nonfeminist s alik e hav e expresse d skepticis m abou t image s o f violent wome n finding thei r wa y ont o th e bi g screen . Wha t I find excitin g about "mea n women " i n films i s that the y allo w u s t o se e tha t wome n ar e no t as violen t a s m e n only because women have not been entitled to violence, politically.

Women's passivit y i s a matter o f politics, no t natura l inabilitie s o r dispositions . Furthermore, th e films force u s to thin k abou t th e relationshi p betwee n fantas y and realit y i n ne w way s (Halbersta m 1993 , 198) . Yet, a s the protes t o f Tribe 8 at th e 199 4 Michiga n Womyn' s Musi c Festiva l illustrates , man y feminist s ar e appalled b y representation s o r fantasize d enactment s o f women's violence . As mentioned earlier , i n performin g thei r son g "Fra t Pig, " lead singe r Lyn n Breedlove simulate d cuttin g of f a peni s (Humme l an d Mantill a 1994) . Pun k music aros e a s a response t o a violent society , s o it ca n b e expecte d tha t a pun k band lik e Trib e 8 will dea l with anger . Breedlov e feel s tha t thi s particular ritual "makes us feel better. . . . It's an effigy" (quote d in ibid., 16) . Although th e ban d did not wis h to push thei r ritual o n potentiall y offende d festiva l goer s and mad e several announcements warnin g audienc e member s abou t thei r show's content , a grou p o f wome n proteste d thei r sho w befor e an d durin g th e performance . During a worksho p afte r th e sho w tha t Trib e 8 hosted , man y wome n wer e concerned abou t "whethe r o r not ange r was good an d whether o r not violenc e was good " (Breedlove , i n ibid.) . Violenc e ha s com e t o b e what' s wron g wit h patriarchy; henc e violenc e itself , eve n i f a fantasized enactmen t fo r a protest, i s suspect. The performanc e ma y even see m like a naive "reverse sexism" that wil l never hel p u s reach a social climat e o f peace an d equality . But suc h representation s d o no t amoun t simpl y t o revers e sexism . Th e images o f violence b y sociall y subordinate d group s ar e no t prescriptive , a sim ple matter o f escalation, o r a reversal of roles. Watching a fantasy o f violence b y women o n stag e or i n film allow s a disruption o f the muc h mor e commo n fan tasy/reality tha t I discussed in chapte r 1 . That mor e commo n fantas y i s not eas ily distinguishable fro m reality , give n men' s socia l power t o merge th e tw o suc cessfully throug h actua l acts of violence and to enforce thei r belief that such violence i s normal, natural , erotic , deserved , an d desire d b y women . Images o f women's violenc e tak e plac e i n a social contex t tha t presuppose s its impossibility. Fa r from solidifyin g th e expectation s an d physica l disposition s of a rape cultur e (a s images o f men' s violenc e an d women' s sexua l availabilit y and physical vulnerability do) , such images call into question th e naturalized sta -

Physical Feminism | 18 5 tus of gendered physica l dispositions . They'r e no t prescriptive ; th e films d o no t work a t that level. They provid e a fantasy o f resistance tha t affect s actio n no t i n the for m o f imitatio n o r copying , bu t i n th e for m o f increase d entitlemen t i n everyday situations , increase d skepticis m abou t th e myt h o f male invulnerabil ity, increase d entitlemen t t o respect , an d increase d confidenc e wit h whic h t o enforce tha t respect . Th e alternativ e films offe r fantasie s tha t disrup t th e associ ation o f wome n wit h passivity . Thes e images , then , ar e no t inconsequentia l because the y ar e fantasies . Not onl y migh t mor e image s o f women' s violenc e hel p rea l wome n thin k that violenc e i s no t simpl y a physica l impossibility , bu t suc h image s migh t reverse the fantasized connectio n betwee n violenc e an d sexuality that more tra ditional image s instil l i n men' s imaginations . Tha t is , men migh t sto p thinkin g that violenc e agains t wome n i s sexy an d heroic , a s traditional fantasie s suggest , and instea d star t appreciating a woman's self-defensiv e violenc e (a s in Aces: Iron Eagle III), o r eve n retaliator y violenc e (a s in Thelma and Louise). The fantas y o f women's brutalit y i s not th e onl y "unrealistic " one . After all , the ide a tha t wome n Wil l actually star t writhing an d moanin g wit h pleasure, o r fal l slavishl y i n love , afte r bein g hel d captiv e (a s in Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down; Overboard; Beauty and the Beast; and an y numbe r o f heterosexua l pornographic films) i s a n equall y unrealisti c fantasy . Thi s fantasy , however , i s one tha t men hav e had the privilege o f entertaining a s real. Just as common fan tasies that eroticiz e men' s violenc e agains t women migh t hav e th e consequenc e of makin g me n (howeve r erroneously ) thin k "wome n reall y wan t it, " o r tha t the resul t o f coercion wil l b e a woman's enjoyment , fantasie s o f women's self defensive o r retaliator y violenc e agains t me n migh t hav e th e consequenc e o f making me n realiz e tha t "perhap s sh e doesn' t wan t it " o r thin k (howeve r erro neously) tha t th e resul t o f coercion wil l b e thei r violen t punishment. 4 Women's violenc e agains t me n i s a textual strateg y tha t migh t effec t a ne w set o f socia l consequences—no t becaus e wome n wil l imitat e thos e films, bu t because thos e films might instil l a new unrealisti c fantas y i n me n tha t wil l affec t their behavio r aroun d women , counterin g o r disruptin g th e imperceptivenes s that the more commo n arrogan t masculinis t fantasie s produce . Th e fantasie s ar e not equivalent , o r simpl y "revers e sexism, " precisel y becaus e thei r institutiona l contexts an d consequence s ar e no t th e same . In chapter 3,1 suggested that popular images of women influence , an d becom e part of , self-defens e culture . Self-defenser s I spoke wit h explaine d thei r relation ships to thos e image s in a number o f ways. On e instructo r lamente d th e fac t tha t Thelma and Louise depicted a woman's shooting that was not legally in self-defense . A firearms studen t tol d m e tha t fo r he r Thelma and Louise was just a "fun adven -

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ture." But I found n o evidence tha t th e women I spoke wit h too k prescription s from thes e movie s o r acte d i n way s tha t skeptic s fear . Instea d I foun d a critica l engagement wit h discourse s o f femininity an d masculinity. I saw a deep invest ment i n popular representation s o f women, includin g a desire for better ones . Still, though , som e rap e preventio n educator s sa y that the y don' t lik e th e way tha t image s o f aggressive wome n ar e eroticized i n popular films . I n thei r view, thi s blunt s th e radical potentia l o f the images . Showin g image s o f eroti cized women i s routine for rape educators; Dreamworlds is full o f them. But rape educators are hoping to increase students' distast e for those eroticize d image s of women's sexua l availabilit y b y showin g th e images i n th e contex t o f a seriou s discussion o f sexua l violence , wherea s student s ar e encourage d t o celebrat e images o f tough women , howeve r sex y student s migh t fin d them . The skepticis m surroundin g th e eroticizatio n o f images o f toug h women , however, collapse s the issue o f the eroticizatio n o f women's helplessnes s int o a problem o f th e eroticizatio n o f women , period . Feminist s hav e becom e s o strongly critica l o f the sexines s o f violence agains t wome n tha t the y ar e now hesitant abou t an y image s o f sexiness—lik e th e muscle-boun d Cor y Everso n who show s of f her mags i n a backless catsui t an d fights wit h Jean Claud e Van Damme (wh o shows of f his mags in a tiny tan k top ) in Double Impact. After all, being sex y isn' t th e problem; th e problem i s what ha s constituted sexiness . But in th e sam e wa y feminists ofte n categoricall y rejec t violence , the y hav e com e to rejec t eroticizatio n o r sexiness categorically. When th e self-defensers sa y that self-defense i s "sexy," perhaps the y are suggesting that grac e and beauty canno t coexist wit h th e traditional feminin e helplessnes s o f days past . Just as social movements a t present are more diffus e tha n in the past, they are also mor e dependen t o n images , symbols , an d fantasies . A socia l movemen t must captur e ou r imagination s an d ou r feelings . T o th e exten t tha t th e self defense movemen t employ s an d contests th e images o f our popular culture , i t might b e mor e successfu l i n disruptin g fantasie s o f women's helplessnes s an d men's invincibility . No t onl y migh t mor e wome n tak e u p self-defense , the y might als o see it as a feminist project . I n other words , i t might replac e th e violence o f fantasized mal e powe r an d women's enjoymen t o f sexual subjugatio n with th e powe r o f fantasize d femal e power . Thi s i s th e importanc e o f self defense instructors ' suggestio n tha t wome n "rewrite " a scene fro m a movie i n which a woman doe s no t fight bac k successfully . In much the same way, the popular psychology book Female Rage encourages women t o rethin k th e Medusa story , emphasizin g tha t Medus a wa s a beautifu l woman who was angered when a man tried to look her over at her bath (Valen tis an d Devane 1994) . Jane Caput i (1993 ) suggest s wome n recuperat e th e age-

Physical Feminism | 18 7 old myths of horrific femal e monster s so as to refigure ou r ow n body-selves . Sh e relates on e woman' s self-defens e stor y carrie d throug h a s th e Gorgon . Th e woman enacte d a demeanor s o threatening tha t th e assailant fled; afterwards, sh e realized tha t she' d becom e th e Gorgo n i n orde r t o scar e th e ma n away . If I am correc t abou t th e radica l impac t o f images o f tough women , an d th e extent to which men's violence and women's self-defense agains t it depend upo n fantasies o f ou r bodies , the n thes e ne w image s hel p constitut e th e self-defens e movement. I n thi s light , rio t grrr l bands , "bitchy " ra p music , mea n wome n movies, an d Dian e DiMassa' s comi c boo k serie s (publishe d b y Stac y Sheehan) , Hothead Paisan: Homicidal Lesbian Terrorist, are all a part of the self-defense move ment. A 199 5 "Free to Fight" girl-rock concer t tou r and album explicitly merge s the sentiment s an d sensibilitie s o f rio t grrr l musi c wit h self-defense . Thei r tou r included self-defens e demonstration s amon g songs , skits, and spoken-wor d per formances. The y pu t togethe r a compilation albu m fro m th e tou r an d a booklet emphasizing self-awarenes s an d self-defense . Fanzine s encouragin g empower ment wer e als o part o f the scen e a t the show s (Al i 1995 , F 1 )Feminists' skepticis m abou t aggression , eroticization , an d women' s pleasure , especially i n th e contex t o f fighting sexua l violence, ha s blunted ou r capacit y t o embrace women' s popula r pleasure s i n th e gyms , th e dojos , an d eve n i n th e movie theater s as part o f a strong antirape movement. W e hav e assumed tha t ou r rape educatio n video s should b e horribl y depressing , an d ou r tactic s for stoppin g rape debilitatingl y angry , pure , an d virtuous . Bu t a s Wol f (1993 , 156-57 ) remarked, in the context of her experience working in a rape crisis center, "Rape , of course, must never be thought o f as run. But should it be heresy to suggest tha t changing attitude s abou t rap e shoul d sometime s b e fun ? . . . Rap e is hell, is trauma, is pain; and, the powe r w e hav e t o chang e th e worl d i s a source o f joy." A feminist tendenc y t o position women a s victims, while strategically useful i n certain instances , has blinded man y t o th e potential o f women's resistance . Fem inist correctives t o self-defens e la w hav e ofte n positione d wome n i n self-defens e cases as incompetent victims . This has been shiftin g recently ; the increasing num bers o f wome n traine d an d prepare d t o defen d themselve s fro m violen t attack s provides eve n mor e reaso n fo r reform s o f self-defens e la w t o mov e awa y fro m those earlie r reform effort s an d instea d incorporat e a physical feminis t vision .

Implications for Feminist Reformation of Self Defense Law An importan t feminis t forc e influencin g self-defens e la w i s th e battere d women's movement . Battere d wome n hav e begu n t o clai m self-defens e i n

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court regularl y whe n they , fearfu l fo r thei r lives , kil l o r maim . Althoug h suc h women usuall y have not ha d formal trainin g in self-defense, thei r prior and cur rent treatmen t i n th e lega l syste m reflect s ideologie s abou t wome n an d aggres sion. Arguments i n thei r defense , a s well a s the legal reforms comin g ou t o f th e battered-women's movement , negotiat e self-defens e la w an d it s underlyin g assumptions abou t wome n an d aggressio n i n way s tha t ar e sometime s a t odd s with th e counterdiscours e o f women's self-defense . My centra l concer n i s that feminis t lega l reformers i n th e battered-women' s movement hav e suggeste d tha t self-defens e la w accommodat e women' s weak ness, niceness, and helplessness, while the self-defense movemen t create s a large number o f wome n wh o ar e strong , assertive , an d fa r fro m helpless . I hav e argued tha t women's self-defens e trainin g metamorphoses th e femal e bod y an d hence constitute s a seriou s challeng e t o popula r gende r ideology , specificall y that whic h differentiate s me n an d wome n alon g th e line s o f aggression . Bu t women wh o kil l thei r batterer s an d clai m self-defens e ar e ofte n defende d o n femininity grounds . Th e origina l fram e o f women's aggressio n a s intolerable i s challenged onl y slightly , an d i s sometimes preserved , i n thi s discourse . Women's self-defens e case s are important site s in which discourse s compet e and provide a n opportunit y t o understan d ho w wome n hav e trie d t o mak e th e dominant discursiv e syste m wor k fo r them . Th e reform s t o self-defens e la w urged by the battered-women's movemen t mus t be evaluate d no t onl y in term s of their succes s defendin g battere d wome n wh o kil l i n self-defense , bu t als o i n light o f wome n wh o ar e traine d i n self-defense . Som e reform s ma y win d u p punishing traine d wome n wh o defen d themselve s i n a n entitle d way . Feminists bega n t o reshap e self-defens e law , wit h battere d wome n wh o kil l in mind , b y incorporatin g a particula r se t o f defens e issues , namel y tha t women's perception s o f danger ar e different fro m men's , tha t women ar e physically smaller and weaker, tha t women lac k self-defens e skills , that women can not handl e situation s tha t ma y requir e the m t o b e aggressive , an d tha t wome n are more afraid o f physical pain than men (Schneide r and Jordan 1981 , 22). Such reforms, however , rewar d womanl y behaviors , preven t wome n fro m occupy ing a juridical statu s a s culpable subject s wit h agency , an d ignor e th e politic s o f legal judgments. Thos e change s i n self-defens e la w hav e mean t tha t a woma n can bes t legall y defen d hersel f if she ca n sho w tha t sh e is helpless, weak, scared , and defenseless . Thi s i s in direc t conflic t wit h wha t th e self-defens e movemen t is doing—that is , teaching women t o ge t mean, b e angry , fee l justified i n fighting back, an d kno w ho w t o fight an d us e weapons . In their self-defense manua l for women, Conro y an d Ritvo (1982 , 7) explai n that i t i s lawful fo r a person wh o i s being assaulte d t o defen d himsel f or hersel f

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from attac k if , a s a reasonable person , h e o r sh e ha s ground s fo r believin g an d does believe that bodily injury i s about t o be inflicted upo n hi m o r her. I n doin g so, h e o r sh e ma y us e al l force an d mean s tha t h e o r sh e believe s t o b e reason ably necessary and that would appea r to a reasonable person, i n the same or sim ilar circumstances , t o b e necessar y t o preven t th e injur y tha t appear s t o b e imminent. Since man y wome n ar e concerne d abou t bein g sue d b y thei r assailant s after incapacitatin g them , w e aske d Chie f Rappapor t i f this wa s a possibility. Whe n h e stoppe d laughin g h e replied , "Ca n yo u imagin e a 210 pound burl y rapis t suin g a 105-poun d frail femal e fo r defendin g hersel f while bein g assaulted? " H e continued , sayin g tha t whe n yo u kno w yo u are i n danger , fight ! I f yo u dela y becaus e you'r e worrie d abou t wha t might happe n i n court , i t ma y b e to o late. " (Ibid. ) That th e averag e ma n i s nowhere nea r 21 0 pounds an d th e averag e woma n far exceed s a petit e 10 5 pound s seem s t o escap e th e chie f an d th e authors . Women hav e los t self-defens e case s precisel y becaus e the y weighe d ove r 10 5 pounds an d i n fac t weighe d mor e tha n thei r assailant . Women' s self-defensiv e violence i s muc h bette r tolerate d whe n thei r weaknes s an d vulnerabilit y ar e highlighted. Bu t th e self-defens e cas e of , fo r instance , a woman wh o sho t he r husband whe n h e turne d t o hur l a pot o f boiling wate r a t he r (Gillespi e 1989 ) shows tha t muc h o f men' s violence , suc h a s throwin g boilin g water , whethe r or no t i t occur s i n a battering relationship , coul d b e don e t o anyon e o f any siz e by anyon e o f any size . Th e man' s siz e i s irrelevant i n som e circumstances . As long as the law accepts women's self-defensiv e violenc e a s legitimate onl y with th e ide a tha t wome n reall y ar e vulnerabl e t o physicall y superio r men , women wil l no t b e see n a s bot h powerfu l an d simultaneousl y justifie d i n defending themselve s fro m attack . Wha t justifie s women' s self-defens e i s th e very sam e ideolog y o f natura l difference s i n size , strength , an d aggressio n tha t perpetuates men' s assault s i n th e first place . Thu s women' s self-defensiv e vio lence i s most ofte n excused , paradoxically , whe n i t doe s no t constitut e a seri ous threa t t o th e systemati c violenc e wome n fac e i n thi s society . This preclude s wome n from developin g th e skill s t o figh t an d ignore s th e many instance s i n whic h th e woma n defendin g hersel f doe s no t fit th e stereo type. Tha t whit e wome n mor e easil y fit the stereotyp e o f feminine helplessnes s in th e popula r imaginatio n i s significant. Th e positionin g o f women a s compliant an d innocent , eve n fo r th e purpos e o f claimin g justifiable self-defens e i n court, exclude s blac k women , wh o ar e stereotype d a s less docil e an d compli ant. Hence , blac k wome n los e unde r thi s framework .

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When feminist s tal k about women' s aggression—say , i n case s of self-defens e against a spouse's assault—thei r rhetori c sometime s take s th e aggressiv e agenc y away from th e woman (see , e.g., ibid. ; Walker 1989) . Such rhetori c o n th e par t of lega l an d psychiatri c professional s position s wome n a s "harmless " (Alle n 1987). I f a female offende r ca n b e positione d a s harmless the n sh e ha s a bette r chance o f claiming that he r self-defens e wa s justified. A s Allen (ibid. , 82 ) notes , "Against th e bal d fact s o f th e crimina l allegatio n o r conviction , thes e report s counterpoise a subtler an d mor e compromisin g versio n o f the case , which sys tematically neutralise s th e assertio n o f th e woman' s guilt , responsibilit y an d dangerousness, an d thu s undercut s an y deman d fo r punitiv e o r custodia l sanc tions." In contrast , me n d o no t hav e t o be construe d a s harmless i n orde r t o be see n as legitimatel y violent . W e presum e tha t me n hav e th e capacit y fo r violence ; the lega l questio n i s simply whethe r o r no t the y exercise d thi s capacit y justifi ably. The presumptio n tha t men bu t no t wome n ca n act violently o n thei r ow n behalf i s closel y associate d wit h th e assumptio n tha t me n bu t no t wome n ca n actively choos e whethe r o r no t t o engag e i n sexua l relationships . A s lon g a s women ar e going to be though t o f as wanting an d liking the sex , forced o r not , that me n wan t t o hav e wit h them , a s long a s men d o no t se e women epistem ically on thei r ow n terms , and as long as men's arrogan t refusa l t o allo w wome n to mak e thei r ow n choice s ha s ideologica l support , women' s self-defens e wil l be har d t o justify . Women ar e currentl y i n a no-win situation : I f a woman seem s to o compe tent, sh e i s als o to o assertiv e an d unfair ; i f sh e seem s to o helpless , the n sh e i s incompetent o r di d no t sho w enoug h resistanc e t o assault . Whe n a woman' s self-defense i s rendere d legitimate , i t i s ofte n becaus e sh e ca n b e show n t o b e irrational o r unreasonabl e (thoug h no t culpabl y so) . Instea d o f characterizin g women's violen t actio n i n thei r ow n defens e i n term s o f the absenc e o f reaso n and will, demolished throug h Battere d Women' s Syndrome , self-defens e coul d be understoo d t o includ e th e presenc e o f reaso n an d will . H o w ca n w e se e a woman's self-defensiv e violenc e a s a willful an d reasonabl e act ? In chapte r 1 I noted tha t "passion " an d "pathology " hav e bee n centra l con cepts by whic h women' s aggressio n i s explained an d contained . Becaus e jurors might no t fin d justifiabl e th e violenc e o f battere d wome n wh o hav e fough t back, th e concep t o f Battere d Women' s Syndrom e (BWS ) wa s develope d t o help explai n wh y an d ho w a battered woma n become s trappe d i n a n abusiv e relationship an d doe s no t leave . BW S implie s tha t battere d women , a s a resul t of ongoin g abuse , suffe r fro m "learne d helplessness " an d therefor e d o no t attempt t o leav e thei r batterer s (Walke r 1979) . Althoug h th e admissio n o f

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expert testimon y o n BWS yielded some important lega l victories, BWS pathol ogizes th e sam e kin d o f self-defensiv e violenc e fo r whic h me n nee d n o suc h excuse. Feminists hav e suggeste d tha t th e Impaire d Menta l Stat e defens e fo r wome n charged wit h homicid e i s troublin g becaus e wome n wh o defen d themselve s should no t b e see n a s insane (Schneide r an d Jordan 1981) . Incorporatin g BW S as a primary defens e issue , however , stil l relie s o n a claim tha t th e woma n wa s driven craz y or incapacitated fro m year s of abuse. Such a defense determine s th e action t o b e legitimat e no t becaus e o f th e circumstance s bu t becaus e o f th e defendant's stat e o f mind . Thi s position s th e violen t actio n a s wron g an d th e woman a s deepl y trouble d psychologically . Suc h a lega l defens e strategy , though i t ma y wor k t o excus e battere d women' s self-defensiv e violence , removes th e possibilit y o f a woman's lega l self-defensiv e violenc e whe n sh e i s being threatene d th e first time . BW S require s wome n t o tak e severa l year s o f abuse befor e thei r helplessnes s i s learne d an d thei r violenc e seem s legitimate . Even i f incorporating exper t testimon y o n BWS ca n help exonerat e th e woma n who kill s her batterer, i t still reinforces th e notion tha t women's violenc e i s reasonable onl y fro m a place o f extrem e victimization , rathe r tha n a s a n entitle d refusal o f victimization . Although originall y intended t o addres s the jury's misconceptions abou t bat tered women (whic h ofte n eithe r accept th e abuse as normal, blame the woma n for bein g abused , o r blam e th e woma n fo r no t endin g th e relationship ) an d t o expand th e legal options available in defending wome n agains t charges of homicide o r assaul t beyon d th e traditiona l insanit y an d incapacit y pleas , th e BW S defense actuall y replicate s th e ol d stereotype s o f feminin e passivit y an d inca pacity. Indeed , th e overal l impac t o f th e BW S stereotyp e migh t limit , no t expand, th e lega l option s o f wome n wh o canno t confor m t o th e stereotyp e (Schneider 1992a , 216-18) . Radford (1994 , 195 ) note s tha t "virtuous " women , th e one s wh o d o no t fight back , coun t a s "true " victim s o f domesti c violence . Th e BW S defens e i s in dange r o f perpetuating thi s separatio n o f "true victims " fro m "viragos, " vic tims who ar e undeservin g o f sympathy. Wome n shoul d no t hav e t o hol d o n t o nonviolence unti l thei r self-contro l an d sanit y finally giv e way . The y shoul d have just a s much right a s men t o asses s a situation reasonably , an d us e violenc e when reasonabl e fo r defendin g themselves . Althoug h BW S migh t justify som e women's self-defensiv e violence , i t fail s i n th e lon g ru n t o allo w wome n th e same entitlement s me n hav e t o defen d themselves . Furthermore, a s bot h Radfor d (ibid. , 189 ) an d Schneide r (1992a ) suggest , BWS wind s u p makin g women' s self-defensiv e actio n see m incomprehensible .

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For i f the woma n ha s been beate n int o submission , fear , dependence , an d pas sivity, it is that much harde r to imagine her taking a radical action such as killing the abuser. At the same time tha t the feminist battered-women' s movemen t ha s tried t o dispe l th e myt h tha t battere d wome n ar e a separat e specie s o f weak , unintelligent, o r damaged women, BW S in some ways suggests exactly that, bu t blames i t o n th e cycl e o f battering. Har t (1994 , 151 ) point s ou t tha t defendin g women o n th e ground s tha t the y were deepl y disturbe d victim s o f sexual abus e troublingly rest s on th e ver y patholog y tha t reproduce s th e socia l condition s i n which wome n kil l in self-defense. 5 Charles Patrick Ewing argues for justifying battere d women's killin g of partners no t b y expandin g wha t count s a s "imminen t danger " an d redefinin g th e "reasonable person " wh o fear s imminen t deat h ( a strategy I discusse d i n chap ter 1) , but rathe r b y sayin g tha t letha l forc e shoul d b e allowe d t o preven t psychological self-annihilation. Becaus e batterer s reduc e thei r victim s "t o a psychological stat e i n whic h thei r continue d physica l existenc e wil l hav e littl e i f an y meaning o r value " (Ewin g 1990 , 587) , "psychologica l self-defense " justifie s killing tha t prevent s suc h a n existence . Psychological self-defens e i s interesting i n tha t i t challenge s th e law' s privi leging o f th e corporea l aspect s o f huma n existenc e (physica l lif e an d bodil y integrity), an d favor s a n existentia l vie w o f self . Feminist s hav e knowingl y stressed th e physica l aspect s o f woma n abuse—eve n thoug h i t als o involve s extreme harassment , threats , an d obsessiv e form s o f control—precisely becaus e they kno w societ y i s more willin g t o redres s physica l har m tha n psychologica l harm (Schneide r 1992b , 535-39) . Still , th e notio n o f psychological self-defens e has man y potentia l problems . Fo r instance , i t solidifie s women' s positio n a s helpless victims , highlightin g th e contradictio n i n one' s utte r helplessnes s an d simultaneous ac t o f (psychological ) self-defensiv e violence . Moreover , i t leave s unanswered th e questio n o f who wil l ge t t o sa y what count s a s psychologicall y damaging behavior . Ewin g (1990 , 587 ) ha s thes e sam e problem s wit h wha t h e calls "battere d woma n defense. " Letha l forc e ca n rarel y b e use d justifiably t o prevent th e inflictio n o f "extremel y seriou s psychologica l injury. " Bu t i f w e imagine a man bein g hel d hostag e b y peopl e wh o hav e no t starte d t o kil l hi m yet, hi s us e o f letha l forc e migh t b e see n a s justifiable no t becaus e o f hi s psy chological terro r bu t becaus e h e ha s reason t o believ e tha t anyon e holdin g hi m hostage wil l als o kill him . Then again , a s Ewing point s out , i n th e castl e an d tru e ma n doctrines , th e law already privileges psychological issue s over physical life fo r specifi c circum stances. Th e la w tha t permit s th e us e o f deadl y forc e t o protec t one' s hom e privileges thing s othe r tha n lif e (Ewin g 1990 , 589) . O f course , th e castl e doc -

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trine may not be a psychological issue as much a s it is a last retreat for the threatened person. Still , women hav e found i t relatively difficult t o justify legall y self defensive violenc e o n th e grounds tha t bein g i n thei r home s wa s a last retrea t justifying life-preservin g actions . Nor have the y been abl e to justify legall y self defensive violenc e o n the grounds tha t a man's threatenin g behavio r produce s a reasonabl e fea r tha t h e coul d kil l the m a t an y moment , th e wa y a hostag e would fee l wit h a terrorist . The citizen' s right t o use deadly forc e t o resis t bein g ouste d fro m he r or his own hom e rarel y work s i n women' s self-defens e cases . Battere d wome n wh o defend themselve s fro m thei r abuser s ar e almos t alway s i n thei r home s a t the time. Bu t the notion tha t " a man's hom e i s his castle" doe s no t see m t o appl y to women ; battere d wome n wh o defen d themselve s ar e inevitably aske d why they didn' t leave . Fo r instance, a n Idah o chie f o f police wh o had investigate d the cas e o f Thelma Griffiths , convicte d o f involuntary manslaughte r fo r shoot ing her husband afte r h e shoved he r violently an d lunged a t her with th e same expression o n his face tha t he had had when h e attempted t o strangle her (Gillespie 1989 , 17-18), wrot e thi s t o th e judge: "W e coul d fin d n o reaso n fo r any one to shoot him . . . . Why didn't she leave the house, she had plenty o f oppor tunity t o do so . . . [she] followed hi m [into th e bedroom]. She claimed tha t he had bee n hittin g her . Was she asking fo r more? " (quote d i n ibid. , 18) . Ofte n women ar e expected t o retreat eve n whe n i n their ow n homes, whil e th e castle doctrine ha s allowed men an exemption fro m self-defens e law' s requiremen t to retrea t befor e usin g violence (ibid. , 82). Battered wome n shoul d no t hav e t o "jus t leave. " Th e deart h o f shelters , financial resources , chil d care , housing, an d employment opportunitie s preven t many battere d wome n fro m doin g so . Many stres s th e nee d fo r mor e institu tional resource s t o which wome n coul d tur n s o that the y ar e not forced t o stay with violen t partners . Man y wome n n o doub t wan t t o leav e abusiv e relation ships and need suc h resource s t o accomplish thi s safely an d successfully. Recen t data sugges t tha t learne d helplessnes s doe s no t characteriz e mos t battere d women becaus e the y mak e a numbe r o f attempt s t o escap e th e violen t rela tionship, see k help , an d refor m thei r partners . Thi s i s a vie w o f "Battere d Women A s Survivors" (Callaha n 1994) . Because man y peopl e (relatives , clergy , teachers , counselors , employers , doctors) an d social services offer littl e help for many battere d wome n wh o seek it, and because the risks of job loss , homelessness, and/or "separatio n attack " are so great, th e relationship an d the abuse continu e (Mahone y 1991 , 65-66). Thi s understanding o f th e battere d woman' s behavio r i s mor e likel y t o rende r a woman's lethal self-defensive measure s reasonable. The revised view of battered

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women a s survivors, however , stil l leaves ou t women' s self-defensiv e violenc e against me n wh o hav e no t bee n batterin g the m fo r a long perio d o f time . Positioning wome n a s victim s (o f eithe r learne d helplessnes s o r a lac k o f social services ) an d the n defendin g thei r self-defensiv e violenc e o n thos e grounds, ca n leav e unexplaine d an d unjustifie d case s wher e wome n tak e self defensive violen t actio n agains t me n wh o assaul t the m th e firs t time . I n thi s light, othe r courtroo m strategie s becom e important , suc h a s a jury instructio n regarding th e righ t t o bea r arms . I f cultural stereotype s lea d juries t o mistrus t a woman wh o ha s knowledge o f self-defense tactic s an d readines s t o us e the m i f threatened—for instanc e i n th e 195 9 case of Mary Elle n Nelson , wh o wa s con victed o f voluntar y manslaughte r fo r fatall y shootin g he r batterin g husban d (who ha d alread y beat her , blinded he r in one eye , slashed her arm with a knife, and cam e towar d he r wit h th e fireplac e poke r wit h whic h h e ha d blinde d her ) with a gu n fro m th e dresse r drawe r whic h sh e kne w t o b e loade d an d kne w how t o use—the n jurie s shoul d b e reminde d tha t women , lik e men , hav e a right t o bea r arm s (Blodgett-For d 1993 , 552-53) . If a woman doe s no t ac t stere o typically, juries ma y ver y wel l hav e a difficul t time understandin g he r behavio r a s reasonable. A grou p o f psychologists foun d that, in experiments involving stranger and date rape, women wh o resiste d thei r assailants bot h verball y an d physicall y wer e perceive d a s havin g bee n mor e guilty o f precipitatin g th e attac k (Branscomb e an d Wei r 1992) . Also , researc h subjects place d more blame o n women wh o competentl y sho t a burglar than o n women wh o handle d th e gu n incompetentl y an d mad e a luck y hi t (Branscombe, Crosby , an d Wei r 1993) . A woman's knowledg e o f shooting an d fighting ca n alread y mak e he r loo k lik e a n aggressor . African America n wome n ofte n d o no t fi t th e stereotyp e o f the "goo d vic tim" becaus e the y ar e stereotype d a s eithe r ver y stron g o r inherentl y ba d (Amnions 1995 , 1007) . Th e dominan t gende r idea l i s th e yardstic k agains t which al l women's action s ar e measured , an d s o such racis t stereotypin g make s black wome n eve n les s likel y tha n whit e wome n t o b e rendere d harmles s i n courtroom trials . Fo r instance , a t th e 199 4 tria l o f Pamel a Hill , a n Africa n American woma n sentence d t o fiv e t o twenty-fiv e year s fo r killin g he r batter ing boyfrien d wit h who m sh e live d (sh e pleade d self-defense) , th e prosecuto r contrasted Hil l t o a "goo d victim " whe n h e tol d th e jury: "[A ] lo t o f peopl e would hav e you believ e Pamel a Hil l is carrying the banner o f Nicole Simpson " (quoted i n ibid. , 1006) . Hill is black, poor , a n unwe d mother , an d alread y con sidered aggressiv e simpl y becaus e sh e doe s no t fi t th e stereotyp e o f femininity . Despite th e fact s tha t rac e doe s no t predic t one' s likelihoo d o f suffering vio lence by intimates (U.S . Department o f Justice 1995 , 4) and that studies of social

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services' responses to African America n wome n revea l preferential treatmen t t o white wome n wh o see k help , man y find i t difficul t t o imagin e tha t a n Africa n American woma n coul d b e trappe d i n a n abusiv e relationship , an d ar e mor e likely t o dismis s he r a s a combativ e person , a s i f he r rac e predispose d he r t o engage i n an d enjo y violenc e (Ammon s 1995) . This explain s why on e stud y reveale d tha t jurors ar e more likel y t o discoun t the account s o f rap e b y blac k wome n tha n b y whit e wome n (Lafree , Reskin , and Vishe r 1985 , 402). I f racist imagination s don' t entitl e th e blac k woma n t o bodily boundaries , the n o f course the y coul d hav e th e relate d difficult y o f seeing he r self-defensiv e violenc e a s legitimate . Hence , jurors , regardles s o f rac e and sex , mus t b e educate d first abou t batterin g relationship s an d the n abou t how myth s about African America n wome n operate . Even positive perception s of African America n women , suc h as attributions o f independence an d strengt h of character , ca n wor k agains t the m whe n use d t o stereotyp e individua l blac k women wh o actuall y ca n b e emotionall y dependen t an d eve n "trapped " i n a n abusive relationshi p (Ammon s 1995 , 1078) . Unlike whit e women , wome n o f colo r mus t fac e th e doubl e burde n o f se x and rac e oppressio n whe n confrontin g violenc e i n thei r lives . Asia n wome n may be reluctant t o report battering because of commonly hel d attitudes towar d family hono r (Rimont e 1989) . Immigran t wome n fac e extrem e socia l isolatio n and fear s o f deportation . Blac k wome n mus t confron t racis t belief s tha t blac k men ar e mor e aggressiv e tha n whit e men , an d a racist socia l structur e i n whic h black men ar e already oppressed. The y ma y even attempt t o understand th e bat tering a s "displace d aggression " tha t result s fro m thei r oppressio n (Cole y an d Beckett 1988 , 483). When judges an d juries don' t understan d thes e issues , thes e women's statu s as victims becomes harde r t o see; hence thei r self-defensive vio lence become s difficul t t o se e a s reasonable o r excusable . Not onl y ca n positionin g wome n a s victim s leav e unstereotypica l wome n indefensible i n real-lif e courtroo m situations , it can als o wind u p includin g som e cases where wome n commi t homicid e tha t is not self-defensive . Thi s is exemplified by som e feminists ' reactio n t o th e cas e of Aileen Wuornos , th e "lesbia n ser ial killer" to some, but th e feminist sex-worke r who neede d t o kill in self-defens e to others . Wuorno s sho t severa l me n dea d (o n separat e occasions) , and , despit e her claim that these killings constituted justifiable self-defense , neve r reported th e killings t o th e police . Tha t som e rallie d aroun d "Lee's " cause , claimin g sh e sho t those men i n self-defense an d was being jailed because she was a lesbian, indicate s a failure t o distinguis h responsibl e self-defens e from irresponsibl e violence . Heroizing o r eve n excusin g Wuornos, b y positioning he r a s a victim o f sexist laws, fails t o giv e wome n responsibilit y fo r th e consequence s o f legitimizin g

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their aggressiv e self-defense . Hel p fo r Le e seems to indicat e a n unwillingness t o see justice a s a contract. Women wh o exercis e what i s currently a constitutiona l right t o ow n a gu n fo r self-defens e undertak e a seriou s socia l responsibility . Treating wome n a s responsibl e citizen s mean s allowin g thei r justifie d self defense and punishing thei r unjustifiabl e violence . Thi s i s th e socia l contract , and women , lik e men , wh o violat e i t mus t b e take n t o task . Seein g wome n a s totally acte d upo n prevent s responsibl e distinction s betwee n case s o f women' s violence. Here's ho w feminis m i s no w tie d int o a knot : Element s o f feminis m fight against notion s o f women a s helpless whil e simultaneousl y sustainin g an d pro moting th e logi c o f denia l an d exculpatio n o f women's violenc e (Alle n 1987 , 82). A woman' s violenc e no t onl y disturb s a prevailin g understandin g o f women a s peaceful an d passive , bu t certai n feminis t ideal s a s well. Thu s femi nists an d societ y mor e broadl y see k t o repositio n th e violen t woma n i n som e other les s uncomfortable statu s (ibid. , 93) . Attempts t o positio n wome n a s victims i n orde r t o defen d thei r violenc e reveal s a centra l tensio n i n feminis m between victimizatio n an d agency : wome n ar e no t see n a s justified agent s o f violent acts , an d s o thei r victimizatio n i s invoke d t o constru e the m a s nona gents. Feminists hav e ha d goo d reaso n t o emphasiz e th e victimization , rathe r tha n the agency , o f th e battere d woma n wh o kill s i n self-defense . Highlightin g a woman's agenc y ca n fee d int o popula r dismissal s o f her abus e an d t o question s about wh y sh e di d no t leav e th e batterin g relationship . Bu t a s I have discussed , fixating o n a woman's victimizatio n ha s othe r problems . Requirin g a battere d woman t o leave th e relationshi p hold s he r t o a higher standar d o f conduct tha n most woul d hav e fo r themselve s o r fo r me n (Schneide r 1992b) . Requiring tha t battered women b e thoroughly victimize d nonagent s before thei r self-defensiv e violence i s understandable als o hold s wome n t o a higher standar d o f conduct . Women's self-defensiv e action s mus t b e pu t int o th e contex t o f thei r victim ization, but the y must als o be understood a s actions (ibid.) . Feminists might bes t get aroun d th e victi m versu s agen t dichotom y b y emphasizin g th e complexit y of women' s everyda y lives , live s whic h includ e bot h victimizatio n an d activ e resistance t o it , bot h desire s fo r intimac y an d compromise , an d desire s fo r respect an d safety . Allen's (1987 , 93 ) wor k suggest s tha t lega l professional s conside r th e cir cumstances (psychological , economic , degre e o f harmfulness t o society , etc. ) o f men an d wome n equally , an d t o invok e th e offender' s statuse s i n orde r t o enlighten, rathe r tha n t o preempt , th e seriou s examinatio n o f women' s (an d men's) action s an d responsibilities . Sh e states ,

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For wha t i s potentially oppressiv e t o women—crimina l o r otherwise—i s for th e frailtie s an d disadvantage s tha t d o ten d t o characteriz e thei r posi tion i n societ y t o b e treate d a s exhaustiv e o f thei r conditio n a s social o r legal subjects . Ther e i s ever y reaso n fo r feminis t analysi s t o retai n a n awareness o f those persona l vulnerabilitie s o f criminal wome n tha t ar e s o insistently portrayed i n th e professiona l reports . Th e delicat e tas k i s to d o so withou t als o followin g thes e report s int o suppressin g th e recognitio n that thes e wome n ca n also—eve n a t th e ver y momen t o f their victimiza tion an d coercion—b e conscious , intentional , responsible , an d poten tially dangerou s an d culpabl e subject s o f the law . (Ibid. , 93-94 ) As Kelma n (1991 ) notes , al l self-defens e claim s ar e political . H e point s ou t that man y liberal s suppor t a battered woman' s violenc e agains t he r abuser , bu t not Bernar d Goetz' s violenc e agains t blac k robber s o n a subway , a s justifiable self-defense. Thi s illustrate s tha t th e perceptio n o f who i s the oppresse d o r vic timized on e determine s whos e defensiv e violenc e seem s legitimate. Thu s any one who see s women an d blacks as victims will not want t o see them killed . Fo r conservatives, th e convers e ma y be true : The subwa y killer' s violence i s under standable bu t th e battere d wife' s i s not, becaus e the y thin k white s an d me n ar e victims, no t black s an d wome n i n thes e circumstances . Liberal s se e black s an d women a s the victims, an d therefor e sid e with them . A s Kelman (ibid. , 810-11 ) observes, liberal s are ultimately persuade d b y tw o propositions . First , th e notio n tha t suffer ing is intrinsically bot h (morally ) ennoblin g an d (cognitively ) clarifying— a notion vaguel y derivativ e o f liberatio n theology—seem s appealin g t o many. Second , privilegin g th e insight s o f th e oppresse d ma y see m a n appealing reactio n formatio n t o wha t i s see n a s smug , elitis t dismissal s o f their competence . Neithe r argument , though , i s likely t o spea k clearl y t o the nonconverted. Sufferin g i s surely as compatible with paranoia as insight, bitterness a s well a s compassion, self-centerednes s a s well a s altruism. BWS actuall y position s wome n a s oppresse d peopl e who , b y virtu e o f th e conditions o f thei r oppression , hav e specia l insigh t o n on e han d (fo r instance , that a battere d woma n reall y "knows " he r abuse r an d whe n h e wil l kil l her) , and, o n th e othe r hand , ar e totall y victimize d nonagent s unabl e t o thin k coun terhegemonic thought s (ibid. , 811-12) . I n contrast , The subwa y kille r i s see n fo r th e purpose s o f lega l judgmen t t o hav e developed hi s paranoid an d racis t worldvie w o n hi s own ; w e invok e th e idea tha t onl y oppressor s ar e intentione d subjects , no t determine d objects, suppressin g th e awarenes s tha t a determinist accoun t o f the sub -

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way kille r i s readily constructed , an d tha t leftist s frequentl y construc t just such account s outsid e th e tria l contex t i n theorizin g abou t unconsciou s or institutiona l racism . (Ibid. , 812) 6 Thus th e proble m i s not tha t anyon e i s trying to tur n a neutral self-defens e la w or a neutral concep t o f the righ t t o self-defensiv e violenc e int o a political too l for a specia l group . Anyon e using , applying , o r reshapin g self-defens e la w i s using a political concept, a political law, for political ends, with a political visio n of gender relation s i n mind . In this light, I suggest that physical feminism i s a particular kind o f vision tha t those struggling with self-defens e la w keep in sight. Self-defense la w must wor k for wome n no t throug h th e inclusio n o f a set o f properly womanl y behavior s that th e la w ca n reward . I t mus t wor k fo r wome n b y acknowledgin g wome n as responsible, culpabl e agent s who hav e the same right a s men t o defend them selves fro m violence . Self-defens e la w wa s construe d wit h me n i n mind ; thi s must b e change d s o tha t a greate r numbe r o f legitimat e women' s self-defens e cases are legally recognize d a s reasonable. But justifying women' s self-defensiv e violenc e o n th e ground s tha t wome n lack fighting skills , for whatever reason, ignores the growing number o f women who hav e traine d t o defen d themselve s fro m assault . Thei r action s wil l no t b e seen as womanly i n the eyes of the law; thus the project o f changing self-defens e law mus t g o beyon d accommodatin g women' s inabilit y t o figh t an d women' s victimization, i n a wa y tha t punishe s neithe r thos e wome n wh o happe n t o weigh a slight 10 5 pounds no r thos e wh o ar e traine d t o figh t an d d o s o imme diately, withou t eve r developin g Battere d Women' s Syndrome . I f self-defens e law include s a separate standar d fo r wome n (e.g. , battere d wome n i n particu lar) then women wh o don' t fi t th e stereotype o f the good victim—such a s black women an d women wh o ar e traine d i n self-defense—ar e lef t withou t justifica tion fo r defendin g themselves . The conflic t betwee n th e battered-women' s self-defens e case s an d th e self defense movemen t bring s t o a head a centra l tensio n i n feminis t theory . Tha t conflict, betwee n equalit y an d difference , ha s frequentl y emerge d i n a variet y of contexts o f concern t o feminists . Emphasizin g women's samenes s with men , chalking u p difference s t o gende r socializatio n an d tryin g t o ge t wome n t o b e treated th e sam e a s men , i s see n a s a rout e t o equality , bu t ca n als o win d u p comparing women agains t a subtly androcentric standard . As I showed i n chap ter 1 , women los t groun d i n court s whe n self-defens e la w wa s applie d t o the m the same way it was applied t o men, becaus e self-defens e la w is implicitly male centered. A woma n wh o defend s hersel f usuall y doe s s o i n circumstance s dif -

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ferent fro m thos e i n whic h a man usuall y defend s himself , ha s a different rela tionship wit h he r attacker , an d i s likel y t o b e perceive d differentl y b y juror s because sh e i s a woman. Exper t testimon y o n BW S emphasize s ho w women' s perceptions tha t lea d t o violen t actio n i n self-defens e migh t b e differen t fro m a man's but stil l reasonable o r at least excusable. Women's deman d fo r equa l lega l status, then, i s not alway s as simple as being treated the same as men. Th e inher ent se x bias of self-defense la w indicates th e failure o f the formal equalit y mode l to accommodat e women' s experience s an d perspectives . Emphasizing women' s differen t bodie s an d socia l contexts , o n th e othe r hand, whil e capabl e o f opposin g male-centere d value s an d norms , ha s it s ow n drawbacks. Specifically , th e differenc e approac h ha s perpetuate d th e ide a tha t men an d women ar e naturally different , an d has often rationalize d unequa l lega l treatment. I n th e cas e o f self-defense, th e la w exempt s a person fro m crimina l responsibility fo r her/hi s behavior , a s a person i s assumed no t t o hav e fre e wil l at that moment . Otherwise , peopl e ar e assumed t o hav e fre e wil l an d thu s mus t take lega l responsibility fo r thei r crimina l actions . Th e la w ha s allowed wome n not t o tak e responsibilit y fo r thei r crimina l assault s mor e ofte n whe n the y ca n be prove n t o b e appropriat e feminin e subject s (i.e. , th e goo d victim) . Self defense la w and its application hav e rewarded "womanly " behavior s just a s they have rewarde d "manly " behaviors . I f women traine d i n self-defens e fight bac k and ar e charge d wit h assaul t o r murder , the y wil l no t benefi t fro m th e differ ence approac h t o self-defens e law . How ca n th e tensio n betwee n equalit y a s samenes s an d difference , playe d out i n thi s instanc e betwee n feminis t reform s o f self-defense la w an d potentia l trained self-defenser s wh o win d u p i n cour t b e resolved ? I f women's differenc e is acknowledge d i n a wa y tha t keep s th e historica l constructio n o f th e sexe d body i n sight , the n women' s particula r historie s an d circumstance s ca n b e dis cussed i n cour t bu t i n a wa y tha t i s no t essentializing , i n a wa y tha t doe s no t generalize, say , helplessnes s a s a condition o f womanhood. Wome n wil l los e i f positioned a s different fro m men , o r the sam e as men, whe n eithe r statu s is used to preemp t rathe r tha n enlighte n th e examinatio n o f their action s i n court . While emphasizin g differenc e i s importan t fo r overcomin g male-centere d frameworks, se x differenc e mus t b e understoo d a s historically constructe d an d embodied i n orde r t o avoi d bot h th e tra p o f essentialis m an d framework s tha t conceive o f the bod y a s irrelevant t o gendere d personalities . Emphase s o n dif ference an d equalit y ar e not oppose d then . Th e emphasi s o n differenc e "i s con cerned wit h th e mechanism s b y whic h bodie s ar e recognize d a s different onl y in so far a s they ar e constructed a s possessing or lacking some sociall y privilege d quality o r qualities " (Gaten s 1996 , 73) . Differenc e mus t eventuall y accommo -

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date no t just ho w wome n an d me n hav e bee n historicall y constitute d differ ently, bu t als o a wider variet y o f forms o f embodiment amon g women .

The Physical and the Feminism of Physical Feminism I hav e describe d a social movement o f women who , withou t necessaril y iden tifying a s feminists, ar e challengin g som e o f th e assumption s tha t suppor t rap e culture. Women's self-defens e i s not onl y empowering , pleasurable , an d trans formative fo r women , o r unsettlin g for men . Self-defens e shake s some assump tions drivin g feminism—particularl y ho w w e hav e bee n thinkin g o f rape, sex uality, an d th e body . Th e associatio n o f aggression an d masculinit y tha t under girds rap e cultur e come s a little unhinge d whe n wome n ge t o n th e mats , ste p up t o th e punchin g bag , kic k th e shi t ou t o f a mock assailant , an d tak e ai m a t the gu n range . Feminists al l agre e tha t systemati c powe r relation s ca n b e changed ; that' s what make s feminism a theory a s well as a social movement. Bu t w e hav e ofte n proceeded a s if men's violenc e agains t wome n coul d no t b e stopped . Ordinar y North America n women ar e contesting the inevitability o f that violence. Whe n women lear n self-defense, an d begin t o take pleasure in a construction o f w o m anhood tha t include s th e capacit y fo r violence , i t confound s an d alter s th e wa y we thin k abou t powe r operations . W e hav e inadvertentl y reifie d mal e power . And, a s we hav e argue d tha t "rap e i s about powe r an d no t sex, " we hav e con strued consensua l se x as free an d goo d (MacKinno n 1989 , 135 , 173-74 ; W o o d hull 1988 , 170) , and positione d womanhoo d a s virtuous an d pure . Keeping women awa y from violence , o r denyin g th e aggressiv e potential i n them, preserve s th e associatio n o f violence an d masculinity , an d uphold s a false similarity withi n th e categor y "women. " I t als o maintain s me n i n a clas s o f "protectors" an d wome n i n a class o f "th e protected " (Stieh m 1982)—a n ide ological arrangemen t tha t justifies heterosexis m an d perpetuates men' s violenc e against women. I n this way, the anti-sexual assaul t movement an d feminist the ory more broadly have failed t o challenge rape culture at its core. Women's self defense cultur e cast s the associatio n betwee n masculinit y an d violence radicall y into question . I t challenge s th e rap e myt h tha t me n rap e becaus e o f siz e an d strength. I t contest s th e distinctio n betwee n sexualit y an d politics . Finally , i t encourages feminis t theorists , educators , lega l reformers, an d activist s to recon sider th e importanc e o f physicality t o consciousnes s and , specifically , th e radi cal impact trainin g wome n i n self-defens e coul d hav e i n women' s live s an d o n rape culture .

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Feminist antiviolenc e educatio n an d activis m migh t bette r challeng e pre vailing social/powe r relation s i f w e emphasize d th e historica l productio n o f gendered identitie s a t the level o f social interaction and at the leve l o f the body . A karat e studen t explaine d th e significanc e o f self-defens e a s i t relate s t o th e body: "Martia l arts , everythin g tha t goe s int o bein g abl e t o thin k o f ourselve s as fighters o r a s strong o r a s having a certain kin d o f body, a strong body, al l o f that has the effect o f making us a counter exampl e t o what women ar e suppose d to be " (i n Tura j 1993 , 59) . A s I discusse d i n chapte r 1 , mal e dominatio n i s already a n embodie d politics ; henc e feminis m woul d d o wel l t o ge t physica l too. I hav e suggeste d tha t feminists ' neglect , an d sometime s outrigh t skepticism , of self-defense actuall y perpetuate s an d solidifie s som e o f th e ver y assumption s of rap e culture . Mor e tha n this , i t obscure s a primar y "consciousnes s raising " arena—one tha t involve s no t simpl y a discussio n o f one' s oppression , bu t on e that, b y enlistin g th e bod y a s part o f one's consciousness , involve s th e reenact ment an d undoin g o f one's oppression . Henc e a feminism tha t give s primacy t o the (re)constructio n o f the bod y i s a physical feminism . I f theories are practices, then feminism , lik e th e patriarch y i t hope s t o eliminate , i s physical. Feminists hav e argue d tha t women , rathe r tha n me n o r th e state , shoul d ge t to contro l thei r ow n bodies . But th e body , no t just a disembodied femal e sub ject, ca n b e see n a s a n agent . Pu t differently , agenc y mus t includ e embodie d subjectivity. Th e self-defens e movemen t encourage s u s to see women a s agents, and understan d (practicall y an d theoretically ) ou r bodie s a s subjects instea d o f objects. Sexua l violence i s oppressive precisel y because i t reduces one' s bod y t o an appendag e o f another. Severa l feminist scholar s have criticjue d th e construc tion o f sexuality, individualism , an d th e mind/bod y dualis m i n muc h o f femi nist thought . Women' s self-defens e illustrate s wel l thes e tension s withi n femi nism. I hav e suggeste d tha t women' s practica l actio n i n self-defens e course s seeks a freedom tha t pushe s beyond traditiona l notion s o f liberal individualism . Although th e aggressiv e femal e bod y i s defian t o f ideologicall y produce d gender boundarie s tha t perpetuat e rap e cultur e an d mal e dominance , i t i s stil l an ideologica l production—on e reflectin g a n ideolog y o f femal e entitlement . The ne w bodil y comportmen t wome n lear n i n self-defens e destabilize s thos e processes throug h whic h th e differentiatin g form s o f difference ar e naturalized . The fighting habitu s o f the self-defense r i s a new femal e body , an d a transgres sive female body . Thi s transgressiv e body i s much lik e the lesbian body, which , making th e "wrong " sexua l objec t choice , disrupt s th e ideolog y tha t wome n are "naturally " attracte d t o men . Bu t o f course, th e self-defens e movemen t ca n and shoul d mak e th e aggressiv e femal e bod y no t simpl y transgressive , whic h i n

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some way s reinforce s th e nor m o f female pacifism , bu t a n acceptabl e nor m o f female embodiment . I hav e examine d th e plac e an d significanc e o f representation s o f femininit y and gende r relation s in specifi c cultura l commodities—suc h a s music, clothing , movies, an d self-defens e lesson s themselves—i n th e live s o f self-defenser s an d simply a s th e cultura l backdro p o f th e increasin g popularit y o f women' s self defense. Wome n involve d wit h self-defens e consum e an d mak e sens e o f thes e images i n particula r way s tha t relat e t o thei r involvemen t wit h self-defens e training. Tha t i s to say , th e real m o f self-defense a s a popular cultura l for m an d the real m o f representational cultura l text s suc h a s "mean women " movie s ar e interrelated an d mediat e on e another . The effort s o f self-defensers t o make sens e of these representations an d com modities, a s well a s the effort s I have mad e t o understan d the m i n th e contex t of a self-defense movement , amoun t t o a struggle t o transfor m th e man y con tradictions o f "being " feminin e i n a social milieu o f often conflictin g inequali ties of gender, race , class, and sexual orientation (Roman , Christian-Smith , an d Ellsworth 1988 , 4). Insofar a s images o f mean wome n actuall y pus h th e bound s of gendered bodie s an d celebrat e a fantasy o f female physica l power, the y allo w women t o tel l new storie s abou t wh o the y are , an d suppor t a n emergin g plea sure i n politicall y reflexiv e physicality . Embedded i n self-defense ar e both dominan t ideologie s o f gender, violence , and morality , an d resistanc e t o an d transformatio n o f thos e ideologies . O f course th e popularit y o f self-defens e amon g a divers e grou p o f wome n wit h diverse political commitment s show s that a s a cultural form self-defens e i s capable of generating many differen t meanings . I have offere d a specific readin g tha t might hel p wome n an d feminis t theorist s t o capitaliz e o n th e transformativ e aspects of self-defense. I f a woman take s self-defense just to get a leg up o n som e primordial mal e aggressive advantage , an d does not deconstruc t he r social position o r se e he r bod y projec t i n a feminist way , i t ma y b e becaus e som e o f th e assumptions an d politica l dynamic s o f feminist organizin g hav e distance d fem inism fro m th e bod y projec t o f self-defense . That i s why thi s book ha s emphasized th e connection s betwee n sexua l vio lence, naturalize d se x difference , mal e domination , an d th e cultivatio n o f fem inine bodil y comportment . Althoug h wome n ar e no t necessaril y show n thi s connection i n self-defens e classes , an d som e self-defenser s migh t no t se e it , I have argue d tha t self-defens e throw s int o shar p relief , an d simultaneousl y help s women unlearn , a cultivated physica l comportmen t tha t make s the m eas y tar gets for men' s violence . I n drawin g thi s connection , I have propose d a way o f experiencing self-defense : a s physica l feminism . Sinc e mal e dominatio n

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demands specifi c bodil y investments , it s transformation wil l requir e ne w bod ies. And it will require a critical feminist skepticis m o f biological theorie s o f sex differences a s wel l a s culturalis t theorie s o f stable , unchangin g duelin g (yin/yang, Mars/Venus ) gende r psychologies . Thi s i s the importance o f a self defense movemen t tha t i s both a n explici t par t o f an anti-sexua l assaul t move ment an d an explici t projec t fo r th e aesthetic s an d politics o f a new woman hood. Freedom ca n be understood a s "the open embodie d engagemen t wit h oth ers in the world. . . . A woman's freedo m i s jeopardized b y the reduction o f her lived body t o a thing through variou s forms o f intolerance includin g the appropriation o f her experienc e by another" (Dipros e 1994 , 113). Of course rape cul ture diminishe s women' s freedo m i n this sense . When wome n ge t the fighting spirit the y ge t the energy an d resolve wit h whic h t o protect themselve s aroun d violent men . The fightin g spiri t i s simultaneously a new feeling, a new body , and a new idea. Thi s i s the political, an d feminist, importanc e o f learning self defense, beyon d it s ability t o enforc e women' s refusa l o f attack. B y declarin g the bod y a n idea, a construction, an d a materiality, th e fighting spiri t defie s th e traditional dualit y betwee n bod y an d spirit. If a freedo m come s fro m women' s self-defense , then , i t i s not simpl y th e freedom o f having more choice s like going out for a jog a t night o r standing up to a bull y withou t fea r o f bein g pulverized . Self-defens e offer s a freedo m t o resignify one' s body . Thi s i s not the same a s "freedom" construe d a s a discov ery o f what womanhoo d "really " means ; i t i s a freedom tha t lie s i n rebellin g against th e way s i n whic h "woman " ha s been defined . Self-defens e doe s not , should not , and cannot tel l women wh o they "reall y are " or put them i n touc h with som e represse d aggressiv e inne r core . Self-defens e ca n free u s from certai n ways of experiencing ourselves and the world. I t can tell us who we do not have to b e at the same tim e tha t i t reveals ho w we cam e t o think o f ourselves a s we did. Thi s is Foucault's understandin g o f freedom (Rajchma n 1985 , 38 , 62). It is a notio n o f freedom tha t i s not voluntaris t o r humanist ; i t allow s fo r constan t attempts a t self-disengagement an d self-reinvention, withou t th e idea o f a wil l or fundamenta l choic e a s to who and what w e are. It is a freeing o f possibilitie s (ibid., 44-45) . I hav e no t claime d t o represen t th e will o r consciousnes s o f North Ameri can women' s self-defens e culture . No r hav e I suggeste d tha t thi s grou p alon e can b e th e agen t o f some sor t o f fundamental transformatio n o f gender ideol ogy. Instead , I have suggeste d tha t th e configurations tha t oppos e womanhoo d and aggressio n ar e historical an d cultural, an d therefore contingen t rathe r tha n natural o r necessarily enduring . W e have the freedom t o question thes e config -

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urations an d transfor m ou r relationship s t o traditiona l gende r ideology . Thi s freedom i s what feminis t politic s i s all about . Of course corporeal self-fashioning, an d freedom mor e generally , has its limits in any given cultura l an d historical circumstance . Chapte r i pointe d t o som e of the ver y rea l sanctions o n wome n wh o dar e t o ste p ou t of , o r whos e lif e sit uations make it difficult t o fit into, a feminine bodil y schema. Women lac k free dom i n thi s sense ; this i s another importan t componen t o f the oppressio n fem inists have decried. My hope is that this analysis enables a way to experienc e an d appreciate women' s self-defens e trainin g with al l its transformative possibilities . As I suggeste d i n chapte r i , th e aesthetic , th e moral , an d th e "normal " ar e intertwined wit h th e political . An d whe n w e op t fo r a ne w bod y stylization , bodily comportment , o r bod y project , w e def y th e patriarchal/feminin e aes thetic. Freedo m i s changin g ou r relationshi p t o tradition , no t predictin g th e future. Thus , i f embracin g women' s aggressio n create d mor e violenc e i n th e world an d onl y subordinate d wome n further , w e woul d the n hav e t o chang e our relationshi p t o th e argument s advance d i n thi s book . Self-defensers ar e disembodyin g a social orde r o f female subordinatio n an d embodying a feminist orde r o f entitlement . A s thes e becom e solidifie d a s per manent dispositions , the y imagin e an d creat e a ne w socia l order . Eve n femi nists, wh o alread y hav e a differentia l politica l vision , fin d i n self-defens e th e opportunity t o develo p th e routines , th e gestura l an d viscera l scripts , o f thos e political commitments. T o th e extent tha t we hav e some choice over what sort s of bodily habit s w e wil l don , self-defens e become s a compelling option , an d a forceful rout e t o th e transformatio n o f traditional gende r ideolog y an d th e sex ual violence i t supports . Often bodil y habit s preced e consciousness . Self-defens e offer s a critica l standpoint fro m whic h t o deconstruc t accepte d idea s abou t se x difference s an d aggression. Self-defens e enable s a "de-essentialize d embodiment, " a centra l route, accordin g t o Braidott i (1994 , 171) , fo r th e achievemen t o f transforme d psychic reality . A s th e bod y get s reconditione d i n self-defens e classes , an d women inhabi t thei r bodie s i n way s previousl y no t imagined , thei r conscious ness a s to wha t kind s o f women the y are , an d wha t i t mean s t o hav e a femal e body, i s transformed . Herei n lie s th e powe r an d potentia l o f a feminis t self defense movemen t an d o f a physical feminism . Self-defense offer s wome n a new sensibilit y i n which t o inves t thei r energy . Any set of bodily dispositions makes the social world meaningful—tha t is , mean something particular—an d self-defens e endow s th e worl d wit h a meaning an d value mor e compatibl e t o th e aim s o f feminism . I t bring s feminis m int o th e realm o f expression , int o th e sensua l worl d i n a new way . Feminis m a t it s bes t

Physical Feminism | 20 5 is more tha n just a willful commitmen t t o a set o f values; it s passions motivat e and sustai n feminis m (ibid. , 167) . Self-defensers presen t u s with a n energized , passionat e se t o f inscribed bod ily proclivities. I have suggeste d tha t thi s bodily resignificatio n i s an affirmativ e one. E d Cohe n (1991 , 84 ) remark s tha t "politica l movement s ar e engendere d by persona l an d politica l (e)motion s tha t impe l peopl e . . . t o pu t thei r bodie s on th e line. " I n thi s sense , self-defens e i s a feminis t (e)motion , whic h move s women t o ac t t o rescrip t bodil y boundaries . Self-defens e a s physical feminis m gives women th e feelin g an d th e knowledg e tha t impel s the m t o pu t thei r bod ies to us e fo r th e preservatio n o f an idea , a body, a spirit .

Conclusion A commentar y o n women' s self-defense , a s on e self-defense r pu t it , open s a Pandora's box . Thoug h I do no t hop e t o clos e tha t box , fro m whic h emerg e a series of arguments, fears , philosophica l positions , ethica l dilemmas , conflictin g political strategies , an d practica l concerns , I shal l conclud e b y suggestin g thre e main controversia l question s tha t I believe thi s stud y raises . First, i t raise s the questio n o f what wil l happe n whe n increasin g number s o f women develo p a n efficaciou s an d pleasurabl e relationshi p t o aggression . Of course, a s much a s we migh t prefe r tha t everyon e embrac e a n ethi c o f caring , and a s muc h a s th e idea l societ y w e striv e fo r i s fre e of coerciv e violence , women canno t embrac e a position o f pacifism whe n tha t wil l onl y caus e thei r further victimization . Tha t said , will self-defensers us e their abilities in a socially responsible manner o r a socially irresponsible manner? However we answe r tha t question, w e mus t firs t acknowledg e th e man y conflictin g definition s o f a socially responsibl e woman . I believ e tha t anyon e wh o want s t o us e fightin g technique s o r weapon s responsibly mus t no t escalat e conflict s i n orde r t o us e thos e technique s o r weapons. Sh e must determin e he r ethica l limits and thresholds for violence. Sh e must b e willin g t o handl e an d stor e weapon s safely . An d w e mus t trea t wome n as culpable subject s i n th e law , understandin g bot h women' s victimizatio n an d agency, while we scrutiniz e th e law for th e ways in which i t subjugates women . Feminism a s a social movemen t seek s t o chang e women' s situatio n an d ha s often suggeste d tha t th e live s o f men , children , an d eve n th e plane t wil l b e improved i f feminis t demand s ar e met . W e mus t b e careful , however , no t t o position wome n a s responsible fo r occupyin g a moral hig h groun d fro m whic h they mus t rejec t al l forms o f power an d domination . Wome n mus t b e respon -

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sible enoug h t o admi t tha t the y see k power . Moreover , th e ide a tha t wome n are th e one s wh o kee p me n tame , wh o nee d t o b e peacefu l i n orde r t o kee p society togethe r an d t o kee p me n fro m destroyin g everything , presume s tha t men canno t b e counte d o n t o ac t ethicall y an d t o contro l themselve s an d posi tions wome n a s the mora l barometer s o f society . Many fea r tha t acknowledgin g women' s capacit y fo r violen t behavior , an d embracing thei r righ t t o violen t self-defense , whil e necessar y fo r self-protec tion, doe s no t ge t a t th e roo t cause s o f violence . O f cours e i t ma y not . Bu t women ar e entitled t o i t anyway. B y analogy, women di d no t deserv e th e righ t to vot e becaus e o f th e ethic s the y woul d brin g t o th e votin g booths ; the y deserved th e righ t t o vot e becaus e i t wa s a right o f citizenship . W e mus t con sider to what exten t w e will hold wome n responsibl e fo r changin g the violenc e of ou r society . Other s ma y fea r tha t i f women's self-defens e becam e a bigge r part o f the women' s movement , w e woul d se e a naive gender-peace-through strength mentality , wher e bot h me n an d wome n woul d ge t mor e an d mor e heavily armed . W e migh t remember , though , tha t wome n ar e no t superpow ers equa l t o men . Hence , i t i s unlikely tha t self-defens e trainin g turn s wome n into equal-opportunit y violator s by allowin g equa l access to th e mean s o f coer cion. It is possible tha t seein g women a s subjects capabl e o f violence, an d violenc e between me n an d women a s subject-subject violence , will make men pic k fights and escalat e pride conflict s wit h wome n a s much a s they currentl y d o with men . It's als o possibl e tha t me n wil l shoo t femal e stranger s a s often a s they currentl y shoot mal e strangers . Doe s a componen t o f chivalr y kee p me n protectin g women fro m muc h o f the violence the y dis h ou t t o on e another ? Even i f that is the case , thi s protecte d clas s o f citizen s (wome n an d children ) ar e ofte n th e excuse men us e to engag e in that violent conflic t wit h on e another , s o any chal lenge t o th e existenc e o f such a class might remov e on e o f men's rationale s fo r violence. I n an y case , chivalry ha s not protecte d wome n fro m violenc e b y mal e intimates—women's suppose d protector s ar e stil l th e me n mos t dangerou s t o them. Further , if men attac k women becaus e they think they can and/or becaus e they ar e s o callousl y imperceptiv e tha t the y misconceiv e o r ignor e women' s desires altogether , the n imaginin g tha t wome n migh t ver y wel l us e violence t o stop the m coul d hel p sna p thos e me n ou t o f tha t privilege d imperceptiveness . Creating fo r wome n th e statu s o f citizen s equa l t o me n equall y capabl e o f an d entitled t o justifiable self-defens e migh t reduc e th e rol e tha t women' s curren t social standing a s objects o f violence play s in perpetuatin g rap e culture . Then again , som e migh t insist , a women's self-defens e movemen t ma y lea d to greate r violence. Maybe wome n d o keep th e peace. At what cos t to women ,

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however? I f th e onl y thin g tha t keep s u s from changin g firearms laws , self defense laws , rap e an d domesti c violenc e laws , socia l programs , an d s o fort h i s women's refusa l t o ge t int o th e arena s deeme d negativel y consequentia l fo r society, the n perhap s women' s entranc e int o thos e arena s wil l forc e the m t o change. This stud y raise s th e relate d questio n o f wha t i s th e bes t wa y t o resis t se x inequality, an d male violence specifically. I s self-defense effectiv e o r subversive ? Since we lac k any objectiv e criteri a fo r decidin g what count s a s subversion, w e must decid e wha t actions , goals , and policies d o o r wil l subver t existin g hierar chies. Ther e i s a long-standing tensio n i n feminis m ove r whethe r emphasizin g women's differenc e fro m me n o r samenes s t o me n wil l hel p wome n th e most . Some feminists hav e been skeptica l of the kind o f political effort s tha t seem onl y to includ e wome n int o th e mainstream/malestream . This , t o them , signifie s a failure t o understan d th e mor e radica l critiqu e wome n migh t hav e o n cultur e and society. So , is getting women th e right s of men th e goal ? Or i s this just get ting wome n equa l acces s t o th e mean s o f violence ? I s i t gettin g i n th e pigst y with th e pigs ? I n othe r words , i s questioning th e patriarcha l definitio n o f it al l the goal ? O r shoul d wome n ge t int o male-dominate d institution s i n orde r t o critique an d transfor m them ? Th e differenc e versu s equalit y debat e loom s larg e here. Those i n favo r o f th e differenc e approac h an d agains t equality-as-samenes s might protes t tha t self-defenser s ar e onl y gettin g sucke d int o a n androcentri c model o f power. Thi s line of argument insist s that emphasizing difference force s us t o chang e ou r valu e system . Thos e wh o heral d samenes s fo r blurrin g th e boundaries betwee n me n an d women , o n th e othe r hand , oppos e emphasizin g how wome n ar e differen t o n th e ground s tha t i t make s wome n an d me n see m inherently, essentiall y differen t whic h onl y fuel s rationalization s fo r inequalit y and belie s th e power/knowledg e regim e differentiatin g me n an d wome n a s members o f distinct sex categories . On e wa y t o resolv e thi s debat e i s to under stand that women's difference s ar e historical, constructed, an d real. Only by historicizing th e body ca n we emphasiz e differenc e i n a way tha t avoid s th e prob lems o f essentialism . A t th e sam e time , though , w e mus t thin k abou t ho w women's entranc e int o "male " symboli c an d institutiona l terrai n migh t alter , not solidif y o r exacerbate , powe r inequality . As Gros z (1995 , 49-54 ) point s out , feminis m initiall y attempte d t o secur e women's acces s to institutions fro m whic h the y were excluded—acces s t o edu cational institution s an d male-dominate d professions , equa l pay , an d s o on — and affirmed women' s abilit y for equal intelligence, ability, and social value. Yet feminism ha s also been committe d t o question s o f social transformation an d cri -

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tique—questioning taken-for-grante d knowledge , socia l structure , an d wor k life—stressing women's specificit y a s the basis of visionary social transformation . Paxton Quigley' s remar k tha t women's strivin g to shoo t a handgun fits right i n with women' s strivin g t o b e doctor s an d lawyer s migh t b e questione d b y fem inists with th e latte r ben t towar d questionin g male-define d values , norms , an d goals. These feminists would urg e women t o redefine themselve s and the worl d according t o women' s perspectives . Gros z point s ou t tha t bot h th e samenes s and th e differenc e orientatio n i n feminis m ca n b e accuse d o f sellin g out , bu t both ultimatel y mus t admi t thei r involvemen t i n patriarcha l powe r relations . One crucia l politica l questio n tha t Gros z (ibid. , 57 ) poses is : "Which commit ments, despit e thei r patriarcha l alignments , remai n o f us e t o feminist s i n thei r political struggles? " For many, th e role o f consciousness is important fo r determinin g whether o r not self-defens e wil l have subversive effects . I f self-defense i s a pleasurable prac tice that' s popula r amon g wome n wh o d o no t alway s identif y a s feminists , i s that OK ? I s pleasure, particularly when "individual " rathe r tha n public an d par t of a collectivel y articulate d politica l consciousness , automaticall y suspecte d o f being complicitou s wit h oppressiv e regimes ? H o w migh t women' s enjoymen t of combativ e bodil y practice s upse t a cultur e o f normalize d mal e violenc e against women ? Ca n self-defens e reall y offe r critica l consciousness ? Wil l women b e seduce d b y violenc e i f it' s pleasurable ? O r doe s th e attractio n o f women's self-defens e t o a broad rang e o f women wh o d o no t identif y a s fem inists hol d th e promis e o f makin g self-defens e a n issu e an d practic e aroun d which a mass-base d movemen t coalesces ? Coul d self-defens e dra w mor e women t o th e feminis t movement ? The thir d questio n come s u p whe n tryin g t o answe r th e secon d questio n o f how bes t t o resis t mal e domination : Wha t i s the relationshi p betwee n individ ual change/empowermen t an d socia l change ? Eve n thos e convince d tha t self defense trainin g transform s an d empower s wome n migh t dismis s i t a s a mer e individual solutio n t o a social, political problem. Th e skepticis m tha t individua l transformation wil l no t caus e collectiv e socia l transformatio n presumes , how ever, tha t women's self-defens e i s only abou t increase d confidenc e o r increase d chances of stopping assault. I have shown tha t self-defense affect s women' s live s and perspective s i n a muc h broade r sense . Tha t skepticis m als o neglect s th e ways i n whic h women' s self-defens e involve s th e organizing , fundraising , an d educational effort s tha t man y othe r classi c feminis t activis t venture s do . Yet th e questio n o f where individua l chang e fits into broade r socia l change s has plague d feminis m fo r a century . Susa n Cayleff s (1987 ) stud y o f a nine teenth-century women' s healt h movemen t illustrate s th e tension . Wome n i n

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the health - an d dress-refor m movement s she d thei r corsets , raised th e lengt h o f their skirts , and donne d bloomer s t o escap e from th e litera l an d figurative con fines o f femininity . The y sa w thi s persona l empowermen t a s a necessar y ste p toward women' s liberatio n i n al l socia l an d politica l spheres . Th e suffragists , while potentia l allie s of the era , rejecte d th e bloomer s o n th e ground s tha t suc h individual, persona l chang e woul d hav e t o com e afte r th e large r politica l gain s were made . The y didn' t wan t t o tur n anyon e of f from th e caus e o f women' s rights; the y fought , an d won , th e vot e fo r wome n i n thei r corset s an d lon g skirts. The sam e tensio n betwee n persona l refor m an d forma l legislativ e chang e could emerg e here . H o w muc h shoul d wome n focu s o n changin g themselves ? H o w muc h o f a social , politica l impac t wil l suc h change s have ? Self-defens e culture clearl y value s persona l change , an d see s i t a s a prerequisit e fo r socia l change. Fo r instance , self-defense r Lis a Sliw a (1986 , 126-27 ) insist s tha t th e social orde r ca n no t b e change d withou t individual s wh o tr y t o chang e thei r own lives : Every woma n ha s tw o options : constan t paranoi a o r usin g th e lesson s o f self-defense t o stan d tall . On e perso n ca n mak e a difference ; al l revolu tions star t wit h a n individual . Befor e th e qualit y o f life ca n b e improve d on thi s planet, peopl e mus t mak e a n effor t t o better thei r ow n lives . Tha t begins wit h takin g a har d loo k a t yoursel f an d asking , "I s m y lif e wort h fighting for? " I hope yo u sa y yes. The ide a tha t "th e persona l i s political " ha s bee n interprete d i n tw o way s worth mentioning . Som e wome n hav e reduce d "th e persona l i s political " t o the searc h fo r persona l satisfaction , neglectin g collectiv e chang e fo r women , o r assuming tha t thei r ow n individua l advancemen t wil l simpl y trickl e dow n t o other women. Thi s makes feminism int o a sort o f therapy movemen t o r femal e culture movement , possibl y with onl y individua l empowermen t effects . Other s recast "th e persona l i s political" i n a prescriptive wa y tha t compel s wome n t o make sur e thei r live s confor m t o abstrac t feminis t politica l ideals , leadin g t o lengthy debate s ove r specifi c sexua l practices an d ove r whethe r o r no t t o shav e one's legs , wea r makeup , ow n a business, o r ge t legall y marrie d (Echol s 1989 , 18). Women's self-defens e coul d b e viewe d cynicall y a s evidenc e o f th e first interpretation o f "th e persona l i s political," wher e wome n concer n themselve s only with thei r individua l chance s o f victimization an d feeling s o f assertiveness, and fail t o mak e collectiv e change . The n again , th e diligenc e wit h whic h man y feminists hav e trie d t o distinguis h th e practice s tha t expres s or perpetuate patri -

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archal values leads to th e kin d o f disabling political correctnes s characteristi c o f the secon d version . I n tha t framework , orthodox y beget s orthopraxis ; henc e self-defense get s ignore d o r rejecte d altogethe r becaus e violenc e i s a "male " way o f handling conflict s an d definin g power . Some migh t stil l object , th e concer n ove r "male " way s aside , tha t self defense onl y change s an individual's feeling s o f safety an d consequen t freedom, and doe s no t challeng e th e rap e culture . I hav e suggeste d tha t rap e cultur e demands specifi c bodil y investments , fo r instanc e tha t th e femal e bod y i s a violable hole. Women's self-defens e target s tha t embodie d etho s an d by extensio n a prevailing social perception tha t women ar e second-class citizen s who canno t and d o no t deserv e t o fight fo r bodil y boundaries . Embodimen t i s substantia l for maintaining and legitimizing the social structure o f sex inequality; thus a critique an d restructurin g o f that embodimen t throug h self-defens e doe s no t sim ply addres s "symptoms " o f sex inequality—it addresse s what ca n be considere d a "cause. " An important implicatio n o f my investigation o f women's self-defens e i s that the individual an d the social are not clea r and distinct categorie s with easil y separable socia l effects . Th e self-empowermen t foun d i n women' s self-defens e affects th e wa y wome n understan d an d experienc e social , political , an d eco nomic issues . Of cours e women's readines s t o fen d of f assailants will no t neces sarily sto p men' s violenc e outright . Bu t a woman's engagemen t i n self-defens e does see m t o provid e acces s to a series o f questions abou t equalit y tha t ha d no t been o n th e tabl e befor e i n quit e th e sam e way . Thoug h learnin g self-defens e is not th e same as dealing with occupationa l se x segregation, for example , learn ing self-defens e di d mak e th e nurs e I interviewe d questio n th e wa y th e mal e doctors sh e worke d wit h treate d her . Self-defens e ca n increas e women' s sens e of entitlemen t t o justice an d driv e fo r self-accomplishmen t i n a variety o f are nas. Furthermore, b y enfeeblin g rap e culture , self-defens e help s undermine th e very discourse s o f sexual differenc e tha t rationaliz e an d sustai n se x inequality i n a variety o f settings. Of course, a change in women's consciousnes s abou t violence doe s not eras e the man y me n wh o commi t and/o r condon e acts along the continuu m o f vio lence agains t women . I n th e 1970s , th e feminis t anti-sexua l assaul t movemen t fought har d t o achiev e th e condition s t o spea k o f previously unspeakabl e act s of violenc e agains t women . Sexua l violenc e didn't , an d won't , en d wit h th e raising of female consciousness , th e educatio n o f the police, o r eve n th e chang ing o f laws . Bu t consciousnes s raisin g le d t o man y grea t socia l changes , indi vidual and structural. Self-defens e raise s consciousness in a way that includes th e body a s part o f consciousness, an d i t to o ca n lea d t o structura l change .

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The vie w tha t suspect s self-defens e o f bein g to o individualisti c t o chang e society position s women' s self-defens e a s an individual , privatize d solutio n t o a social proble m tha t reall y demand s collectiv e actio n an d legislativ e change . Training i n self-defens e certainl y shoul d no t b e th e onl y solutio n t o th e socia l problem o f violence agains t women . Bu t neithe r shoul d lega l reform s o r Tak e Back th e Nigh t rallies . Laws shoul d reflec t an d sprea d a devout intoleranc e fo r violence agains t women . Batterer s an d rapist s shoul d fac e th e crimina l justic e system. Feminis t healt h centers , bookstores , theate r groups , newspapers , an d women's studie s programs should challenge sexist ideas and practices. Women' s self-defense affect s wome n i n positiv e way s tha t complemen t thes e efforts , an d in fac t ca n accomplis h som e thing s tha t the y cannot , namel y th e corporea l change tha t disrupt s th e embodie d etho s o f rape culture . The physica l feminis m o f women' s self-defens e ha s polic y implications . I t has implication s fo r reform s o f self-defens e law , fo r th e fundin g o f socia l ser vices, an d rap e preventio n education . I t ha s implication s fo r women' s studie s scholarship an d fo r man y othe r feminis t organization s an d activis t efforts . Women's self-defens e ca n chang e thes e institutions , no t onl y b y helpin g women embod y de-essentialize d notion s o f womanhoo d bu t als o b y pushin g those socia l institution s t o questio n th e categorie s wit h whic h the y hav e bee n operating. Legal precedent s wit h regar d t o rape , domesti c violence , an d self-defens e might include a physical feminist vision . Som e o f the money tha t states get fro m the Violenc e Agains t Wome n Ac t need s t o b e directe d towar d "preventative " measures tha t g o beyon d stree t lights. Gu n contro l strategie s mus t b e evaluate d for ho w adequatel y the y serv e the need s o f those whose live s could be save d b y the self-defensiv e us e o f a firearm, fo r instanc e battere d wome n (se e Blodgett Ford 1993) . Women's shelter s an d rap e crisi s center s coul d offe r fa r mor e self defense trainin g an d kee p a s a more explici t par t o f their mission s th e disman tling o f rape culture' s myth s tha t insis t upo n men' s natura l physica l superiorit y and women's natura l violability. Rap e preventio n educatio n program s coul d b e evaluated fo r ho w wel l they kee p me n fro m assaultin g women, o r for ho w wel l they hav e increase d women' s freedo m t o mov e aroun d i n th e world . Physica l feminism i s not just th e practic e o f self-defense, then . I t involve s th e reevalua tion o f policies, legislation, an d othe r strategie s for chang e wit h th e counterdis course o f self-defens e i n sight . Moreover , th e strategie s o f physica l feminis m cannot b e pursued , o r seen , i n isolation . A physica l feminis m add s th e muscl e the women' s movemen t need s t o brin g rap e cultur e t o it s knees .

Appendix: Conceiving th e Kick o f Self-Defens e I Method s o f Investigatio n

This appendi x explain s th e method s o f investigatio n an d politica l concerns that have informed m y study . Firs t I explain th e logic and significanc e of my participan t observation , interview s wit h self-defens e instructor s an d stu dents, immersio n i n th e cultur e o f women' s self-defense , an d examinatio n o f the lega l treatmen t o f women's self-defense . The n I discus s th e way s i n whic h feminist cultura l analysts have studied women an d popular culture , situating m y analysis in term s o f such approaches . Specifically , I argue tha t m y involvemen t and pleasur e i n th e cultur e I interpret ha s affecte d m y analysi s i n way s tha t ar e not onl y importan t fo r m y interpretatio n o f self-defens e cultur e bu t fo r femi nist debate s surroundin g women' s popula r pleasure s mor e broadly .

Participant Observation I spent over 12 0 hours participating in self-defense classes , and another 1 5 hours observing them . Wh y doe s m y participatio n giv e m e th e authorit y t o interpre t the phenomenon ? M y feminis t theoretica l insight s pu t m e i n th e uniqu e posi tion t o g o throug h th e self-defens e experienc e an d mak e sens e o f th e instruc tion i n a way tha t i s appropriate t o answerin g question s abou t gender , aggres sion, an d rap e culture . Judit h Rollin s (1985 ) wante d t o kno w ho w whit e women trea t the women o f color they hire a s domestic workers , so she becam e a domesti c worke r t o find out . Rollin s too k field note s an d use d he r experi ences a s an importan t sourc e o f insight int o th e dynamic s betwee n wome n i n such employmen t situations . Sh e simultaneousl y use d he r understandin g o f racism, sexism , an d socia l psychology t o explai n he r experience s an d th e expe riences o f othe r domesti c worker s sh e interviewed . I n muc h th e sam e way , I analyze m y experience s i n self-defens e courses , an d th e observation s tha t self -

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defensers share d with me , throug h a feminist theoretica l lens . During m y inter views an d participan t observation , I paid carefu l attentio n t o th e differen t way s women spok e o f thei r trainin g an d it s influenc e i n thei r lives . Whil e n o one' s experiences i n self-defens e ar e th e sam e a s anyon e else's , m y interview s wit h self-defensers revea l that m y experience s ar e in fac t no t s o different fro m theirs . Traditional ethnographi c researcher s maintai n a "critical distance " and ofte n a lack o f identification wit h th e grou p unde r study . I n thi s situation, th e schola r reports t o a n academi c grou p wit h whic h sh e identifies t o describ e th e "other " group. Not onl y di d I want t o describ e self-defenser s i n ways that would enabl e them t o recogniz e themselve s an d thei r perspectives , bu t I di d s o a s someon e who identifie s wit h thos e experience s an d perspectives . I fee l m y "insider " statu s ha s facilitated , no t hindered , m y accountabilit y t o those women . Researcher s ar e typicall y mor e skeptica l o f thos e wit h who m they d o no t identify , exhibitin g a greate r willingnes s t o dismis s th e practice s under investigatio n a s examples o f "fals e consciousness " (Kurzma n 1991) . No t only wa s I unwillin g t o conside r thes e wome n fools—afte r all , I wa s goin g through simila r experiences, having similar reactions—but I became a fan o f the movement an d its potential. M y positio n withi n th e movemen t mad e m e com mitted t o enhancin g i t rathe r tha n draggin g i t dow n wit h a set o f sophisticate d but distance d academi c criticisms . Certainly mos t self-defenser s d o not hav e th e time o r th e interes t tha t I have ha d t o analyz e women' s combativ e bodil y prac tices. Thu s I offer a set o f feminist insight s fo r self-defens e culture , i n th e spiri t of makin g i t mor e connecte d t o a broade r feminis t anti-sexua l assaul t move ment. A t th e sam e time, m y inside r statu s enhance s th e stor y I can tel l to inter ested scholars , an d I tel l tha t stor y i n th e spiri t o f encouragin g feminis m t o embrace women' s self-defense . Of course , havin g a n academi c engagemen t wit h self-defens e mad e th e instruction differen t fo r m e tha n fo r thos e wome n i n m y classe s who , fo r instance, too k u p self-defens e becaus e thei r live s wer e bein g threatened . I d o not personally kno w wha t learnin g self-defense woul d b e like under thos e con ditions. Bu t I di d shar e wit h self-defenser s th e transformativ e experienc e o f learning to fight back . I learned tha t I , like so many othe r women , ha d becom e accustomed t o holdin g bac k m y voice , m y anger , an d m y physica l strength . I felt th e fea r o f a gun an d th e exhilaratio n o f shooting one . I knew th e encour agement o f instructor s an d fello w students . I spen t tim e i n th e compan y o f women wh o discusse d th e significanc e o f self-defens e training . Throug h thi s immersion, I developed a n appreciatio n fo r wha t self-defens e cultur e ca n offe r to women , an d wh y self-defens e instructor s devot e themselve s t o trainin g women t o fight.

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Becoming a self-defenser als o proved educationa l i n term s o f how i t feels t o live in a predatory cultur e afte r havin g learned self-defense , an d how me n reac t to women wh o tak e u p self-defense . Throughou t m y research , whic h ha s con sisted of increasing degrees of familiarity wit h self-defense , I have been harasse d and intimidated by men in many situations. I have thus kept trac k of how learn ing self-defens e ha s change d m y feeling s an d reaction s i n suc h situations . I have als o had th e opportunit y t o hea r me n react , ove r an d over , eac h tim e I explaine d wha t I was studying. Th e mos t commo n reactio n involve d a declaration to be careful aroun d me ("Don' t mes s with her, man"; "I'l l have to watc h my ste p aroun d you") , whic h coul d indicat e eithe r tha t me n kno w tha t ignor ing women's boundarie s wil l usuall y bring n o consequence s o r tha t me n thin k women wit h self-defens e know-ho w wil l use it inappropriately. Also , one ma n lectured m e abou t ho w wea k I was, tellin g m e tha t h e fel t lik e beatin g m e u p to prove that he was (men were) stronger than me. Interestingly, thi s man is five feet seve n inche s tal l an d weigh s 14 0 pounds . Anothe r mal e frien d unexpect edly pinne d m e o n th e ground ; h e bulldoze d me , rathe r artfull y an d painlessl y as he ha d som e experienc e i n th e martia l arts , because h e wante d t o se e what I could d o t o ge t hi m off . Self-defense instructor s sa y this sort o f thing happens t o thei r student s al l th e time; in fact, the y make a point o f recommending tha t women no t discus s thei r self-defense classe s with me n wh o migh t giv e the m a hard time . I hear d abou t a woma n wh o wa s jumped b y he r boyfrien d wh o wante d t o se e i f she coul d really fight hi m off . I witnessed a man's tellin g his girlfriend, wh o wa s about t o take a padded attacke r course, that she should save her money because he'd stuf f a few pillow s i n hi s shirt an d le t he r practic e he r move s o n him . O f cours e sh e could d o enoug h damag e t o hur t hi m an d is powerful enoug h t o warrant train ing wit h a seriousl y padde d moc k assailant , bu t th e messag e seem s t o be , " I don't believ e yo u ca n d o it. " Th e myt h tha t me n ar e s o stron g an d powerfu l relative to women i s one in which som e men ar e deeply invested. After all , dur ing adolescenc e boy s sometime s remin d eac h othe r tha t the y coul d tak e a gir l and rap e her ; some , secur e i n thei r powe r ove r th e opposit e sex , eve n tel l girl s that they'r e goin g t o rap e them ; other s actuall y d o it , alon e o r i n groups . Eve n the me n wh o welcom e challenge s t o thei r privilege d plac e i n th e worl d migh t still be more o r less naively committe d t o th e myt h o f male strengt h an d femal e weakness. Then again , man y me n hav e bee n thrille d b y m y self-defens e training . Some, s o investe d i n m y abilities—eve n excite d tha t I coul d b e attacke d a s I' d "get th e chance " t o bea t a man—have boaste d abou t m e t o othe r men . A fe w of thes e me n offere d m e weapon s o r othe r persona l protectio n item s a s gifts ,

Appendix: Conceiving the Kick of Self-Defense | 21 5 including peppe r spray , a British polic e whistle , a knife, an d a handgun. Whil e many wome n hav e bee n enthusiasti c abou t m y project , the y hav e neithe r offered m e weapons no r tried t o pin me on the ground . By having casual experiences an d discussions with student s and instructors in the self-defens e classe s I too k an d by readin g self-defens e publications , I col lected informatio n informally . I collecte d informatio n mor e systematicall y b y conducting forma l interview s wit h self-defenser s outsid e o f class and by takin g field note s afte r class . Thi s "insider " knowledg e inform s m y analysi s through out th e book, bu t especially i n chapter s 2 and 3, in which I explain wha t hap pens i n self-defens e classe s an d interpre t th e significanc e o f women' s self defense, respectively , an d in chapters 4 and 5, in which I discuss the significanc e of women's self-defens e fo r feminism .

Interviews I interviewed twenty-fiv e peopl e for this study, includin g students and instructors from padde d attacke r courses , martia l art s courses, and firearms courses , by asking for volunteers durin g my classes and also by word o f mouth. A few selfdefensers wer e no t interested i n speaking t o me. My sense was that thos e who were not interested i n talking with m e either simpl y did not like me personally, were skeptica l o f academic researc h an d of being studied , o r were to o busy o r emotionally overwhelme d t o spend th e energy discussin g their involvemen t i n self-defense wit h me . Still , man y mor e volunteere d t o b e interviewe d tha n I could actuall y interview . I conducte d som e interview s ove r th e telephon e (whe n th e studen t o r instructor live d fa r away) , som e i n perso n whil e w e wer e takin g th e clas s (a t a break durin g a class, o r at a restaurant afte r class) , an d some i n person afte r th e student had already taken the self-defense cours e one month t o three years prior. Most o f the instructor s I interviewed wer e teachin g me , or had taught m e self defense prio r t o th e interview. Some , though , wer e instructor s whos e classe s I observed eithe r before o r after th e interview. And in two cases, I interviewed an instructor whos e cours e I could onl y rea d abou t an d not take o r observe . All o f the in-perso n interview s wer e tape-recorded , an d mos t o f the tele phone interview s wer e don e wit h m y computer i n front o f me s o that I coul d record interviewees ' response s verbatim. I n one instance, though , a n instructo r whose cours e I wa s observin g spok e wit h m e informally , withou t m y tap e recorder, whil e her students were practicing exercises, and then answere d mor e formal question s o n tap e afte r th e first par t o f th e intervie w wa s over . I n

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another instance , my tape recorder malfunctione d durin g one portion o f an inperson interview . I n thes e cases , I simpl y trie d t o writ e dow n everythin g tha t the people tol d me during, and immediately after , th e interviews. All of the stu dent interviews, and some o f the instructor interviews, were anonymous . Som e instructors chos e to be identified eithe r because the y were alread y known pub licly fo r thei r opinion s o r because the y wante d thei r view s t o be know n pub licly an d associated wit h thei r self-defens e organizations . Interviewing student s wh o were i n the midst o f or fresh ou t of self-defens e class, as well a s students who took th e course tw o or three year s prior, enable d me t o tal k wit h wome n wh o had had different amount s o f time t o be affecte d by and reflect o n their involvement wit h self-defense . Thi s is important becaus e immediately followin g self-defens e classe s wome n ofte n hav e a particularl y heightened awarenes s abou t th e possibilit y o f assault , whic h severa l week s o r months abate . Fo r the same reason , interviewin g student s wh o were no t the n taking self-defense possibl y gave me access to the type of student who felt over whelmed, an d thus woul d no t hav e grante d a n interview , i n th e midst o f her self-defense class . Some o f the wome n wer e student s wit h me , and some wer e not. I was referred t o th e latter throug h anothe r studen t o r instructor. Onc e I attempted t o interview wome n i n the martial art s by posting a sign a t a martial arts doj o askin g t o spea k wit h peopl e abou t thei r experience s learnin g self defense, bu t I gained acces s to no one this way. I tried to interview a variety o f women, althoug h i n the end I took whoeve r volunteered. Th e sampl e i s predominantl y white . I d o no t know , however , whether o r not self-defense student s nationwide ar e mainly white. This was not a national surve y o f self-defense course s and students, an d that dat a is not available. I aske d interviewee s fo r demographi c informatio n bu t som e refuse d t o reveal their age and race. In these cases I made note of what my inferences were . Four volunteered thei r sexual identities (on e lesbian, one bisexual, and two heterosexual) i n the course o f their interview s wit h me , although mos t di d not. I considered makin g inference s abou t sexua l identity , fo r instanc e i f a woma n mentioned tha t she had a husband, but decided agains t it because eve n an obvious statu s suc h a s married doe s no t necessarily indicat e tha t a woman identifie s as heterosexual. Thu s I was unable t o mak e an y conclusions abou t differentia l effects o f self-defense lesson s based o n women's sexua l o r racial identities . I interviewe d student s t o understan d ho w the y experience d thei r self defense classes , how they framed wha t the y were learning, and how they talke d about it s effects i n thei r lives . My interview dat a help s establis h a theoreticall y informed pictur e o f the relationshi p o f self-defense t o gender ideology . Durin g the cours e o f my research , I discovered Gaddis' s (1990 ) doctora l dissertatio n fo r

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which h e interviewe d student s o f Mode l Muggin g an d wa s give n a cop y o f Turaj's (1993 ) master' s thesi s fo r whic h sh e interviewe d student s o f karate . While th e foci o f their studie s are different from th e focus o f mine, I occasion ally quote thei r interviewees . Some o f the student s I interviewed di d not just tel l m e thei r persona l feel ings abou t thei r involvemen t wit h self-defens e bu t rathe r share d thei r critica l analyses of their self-defense instruction , o r of feminism an d the antirape move ment. Fo r instance, on e interviewee sai d tha t sh e felt sh e could no t be a full fledged feminis t withou t knowin g how to keep men from bullying her. She said self-defense i s feminism applie d o r "feminism o n the physical level." This sam e interviewee wante d t o mak e clea r tha t wome n ar e no t automaticall y passive , vulnerable, o r afrai d t o fight. Whe n sh e told m e abou t he r ex-lover wh o bat tered her , she said, " I always fought back . I just kep t losin g the fights. I neede d training." In a similar spirit of intellectual and political engagemen t wit h women' s self defense, som e o f the instructors I interviewed offere d criticism s o f rape culture , self-defense instruction , an d eve n m y project . Fo r instance , a s I conducte d interviews fo r wha t wa s at tha t tim e a doctoral dissertation , a few questione d my origina l title , "Gettin g Mean, " explainin g tha t the y di d not want peopl e t o think wome n wer e "mean " whe n the y defende d themselves . Instructor s spen d so much o f their tim e working t o counter th e popular stereotyp e tha t women' s assertiveness i s mean tha t the y preferre d I use the word assertive instead o f mean and aggressive. O f course , I wante d m y titl e t o cal l attentio n t o tha t issu e an d embrace th e very behaviors though t unbecomin g for a lady. Nevertheless , I felt it was necessary to respond to instructors' concern s by changing the dissertation title. I calle d i t "Physica l Feminism, " base d o n th e aforementione d intervie w with a self-defense student . Thi s convey s th e importanc e o f the bod y i n self defense an d its relationship t o feminism. Bu t I changed th e title yet again whe n I turne d th e dissertation int o a book sinc e th e word feminism alienate s a s many women a s the word mean. To many women, feminism ha s come to stand for disempowered victim s complainin g abou t thei r powerlessness—no t wha t thi s book i s about. I was determined t o retai n "physica l feminism " somewher e i n the titl e afte r readin g Elizabet h Gros z (1994 ) o n "corporea l feminism. " The ai m o f m y stud y i s t o explor e gendere d notion s o f aggressio n an d women's aggressiv e refusa l o f men's aggression . I wante d t o investigat e wha t makes possibl e women' s freedo m t o defen d themselve s from sexua l assaul t legitimately. M y interview question s thu s involve d th e following topics : H ow have wome n changed ? H o w do people reac t t o the women's transformations ? Against who m d o women se e themselves usin g self-defense? An d how, if at all,

2i 8 I Appendix: Conceiving the Kick of Self-Defense have women's understanding s o f themselves an d thei r relationships with popu lar cultur e (includin g imagisti c discourse s o f femininity) changed ? One purpos e o f the interview s wit h instructor s was to understan d ho w the y see wha t the y ar e doing . I wante d t o kno w th e philosophie s behin d thei r courses. My feminis t aim s made m e questio n self-defens e instructor s i n specifi c ways. Fo r instance , I "tested " thei r knowledg e o f sexual violence, an d feminis t critiques o f gender, wit h specifi c question s suc h as , "Who ar e the assailant s yo u are trainin g you r student s t o defen d themselve s from? " an d " H o w d o yo u incorporate self-defens e la w int o you r class? " Sinc e th e instructor s ha d muc h more experienc e watchin g wome n ge t toug h tha n I did , th e othe r purpos e o f interviews wit h instructor s wa s informational . Man y o f m y question s allowe d instructors t o tel l m e thei r impression s o f students ' transformations . Fo r instance, I asked , "I n you r experienc e teaching , wha t i s th e mos t challengin g thing fo r wome n t o learn? " I als o asked , "Wha t d o yo u sa y o r d o t o hel p stu dents mee t tha t challenge? " The participan t observatio n research , whic h I present i n chapte r 2 , enable d me t o interpre t th e intervie w dat a rathe r tha n simpl y us e th e interview s i n th e service o f description. I n chapte r 3, 1 tell the stor y o f self-defense analytically. I n other words , I us e m y participan t observatio n t o tel l th e stor y o f self-defens e and the n us e intervie w data , combine d wit h participan t observatio n data , t o develop a theoretically informe d interpretatio n o f it.

Published Materials I read the manuals published fo r women o n self-defens e becaus e doin g so famil iarized m e wit h th e kin d o f advice tha t i s available t o wome n wh o d o no t nec essarily tak e self-defens e courses . Document s suc h a s Corpora l Willia m J . Underwood's Self-Defense for Women: Combato (1944) , th e Californi a Stat e Police's Safety Tips for Women (1976) , an d Lis a Sliwa' s Attitude: Commonsense Defense for Women (1986 ) revea l various assumption s abou t gende r an d violenc e as they sugges t th e mean s b y whic h wome n migh t achiev e safet y an d freedom . Self-defense books , manuals , an d pamphlets—lik e th e example s I use d from popular culture , rap e law , an d self-defens e law—provid e a sens e o f th e tradi tional understanding s abou t wome n an d aggression , whic h i n tur n enable s a n understanding of the ways in which hands-o n self-defens e instructio n challenge s those understandings . B y examinin g ho w thos e assumption s ar e conteste d an d not contested , I gaine d insigh t int o commo n understanding s o f wome n an d aggression, includin g ho w women' s relationshi p t o aggressio n i s seen i n th e first

Appendix: Conceiving the Kick of Self-Defense | 21 9 place and how it is reorganized. I n this way, self-defens e manual s are a source of information abou t bot h traditiona l an d developing assumptions . In additio n t o reading self-defense manuals , I collected th e current newslet ters and magazines for self-defensers throughou t m y research. I read the curren t self-defense-oriented publication s fo r wome n becaus e thi s helpe d m e becom e familiar wit h th e culture o f self-defensers. I read the m a s both a researcher and a blooming self-defenser. Readin g these publications as I went throug h th e selfdefense course s enable d m e not only t o get my study of f the groun d bu t also to understand bette r th e subtl e difference s i n perspectiv e o f various self-defens e disciplines. Organizationa l newsletter s mak e u p par t o f th e discours e o f self defense instruction . I include item s fro m the m i n my book becaus e suc h item s are artifact s tha t reflec t th e agenda s an d activities o f their correspondin g orga nizations (Jennes s and Broad 1994 , 407). I examined th e following publications : in the martial arts , the newsletter o f the Nationa l Women' s Martia l Arts Feder ation, Shuri-Spiral News, an d Fighting Woman News; i n firearms, American Rifleman (specificall y th e sections o n women) an d Women and Guns; and in padde d attacker programs , emPOWERment News an d Self-Defense and Empowerment News (formerl y Model Mugging News) . One interestin g developmen t i n women's self-defens e cultur e di d not exis t when I began thi s researc h bu t deserves notin g here . Sinc e th e fall o f 1994 , the Assault Preventio n Informatio n Networ k (APIN ) ha s provide d a fascinatin g dialog abou t women' s self-defens e o n th e interne t ( http://galaxy.tradewave. com/editors/weiss/APINintro.html). I wa s stil l completin g thi s boo k a t th e time tha t I discovere d th e API N Worl d Wid e We b site , wit h ove r on e hun dred screen s o f informatio n abou t self-defense , workplac e violence , conflic t resolution, an d related topics . Fo r instance, net-surfin g self-defenser s wil l find stories o f "real-life self-defense " (includin g arme d self-defense) , list s of domestic an d internationa l self-defens e organizations , a discussio n o f lega l issues , guidelines fo r choosin g a self-defens e course , a lis t o f self-defens e book s an d videos, an d articles abou t th e importance o f self-defense training . Judith Weis s is the originator, researcher , an d maintainer o f the APIN we b site, which bega n as a schoo l projec t bu t ha s continue d a s a labor o f love. It s onl y institutiona l connection i s the Galaxy We b Directory, whic h provide s i t as a public servic e through thei r Gues t Editor program. Sinc e the discussions on the web were not a means by which I became familia r wit h th e world o f self-defense, no r a means by whic h I arrived a t my theoretical argument , I do not include the m here . Throughout th e readin g an d fieldwork I aske d specifi c question s t o lear n about th e way s i n whic h gende r i s implicitl y o r explicitl y challenge d i n self defense culture . I coded dat a fro m fieldwork, interviews , an d nontechnical lit -

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erature tha t pertai n t o th e specifi c phenomeno n o f women' s learnin g self defense. Othe r codin g categorie s pertaine d t o condition s an d contexts relate d to, and actions that manage, that phenomenon. I use this data, then, to enhanc e my interview s an d field observations . M y claim s involv e a set o f knowledge s produced i n particula r setting s an d in particula r materials , a s they ar e experi enced by a group o f women ( a group that does not necessarily represent wome n as a whole). I suggest a way of reading an d experiencing self-defens e from th e theoretical vantag e poin t o f gender (includin g th e sexed body ) a s a social con struction, becaus e I thin k i t woul d hav e th e consequenc e o f challengin g th e gender ideolog y tha t undergird s rap e culture .

Self-Defense Law In chapter i , I discuss the historical rejection o f women's aggressio n in the legal system, becaus e I suspected tha t th e discourses aroun d gender , aggression , an d sexual assaul t tha t distinguis h wome n wh o us e aggressiv e forc e legitimatel y from thos e wh o d o not , ar e simila r i n th e lega l system , i n crim e preventio n advice, an d fol k wisdom . Man y wome n ar e punishe d legall y fo r defendin g themselves. Thi s ma y explain wh y other wome n d o not defen d themselves — not becaus e the y kno w certai n statistic s or the law but because the y inhabi t the same se t of discourses tha t distinguis h (in)appropriat e use s o f violence. T o th e extent tha t self-defens e instructio n challenge s the commonly accepte d assump tions abou t wome n an d violence , I conside r ho w thes e opposin g discourse s might meet one another when, say , a Model Mugging graduate or a former stu dent o f Paxton Quigle y i s on tria l for assault an d battery. Thus , i n chapte r 5 , I examine th e possibl y clashin g consequence s o f women's self-defens e trainin g and struggle s ove r th e legal treatmen t o f women wh o fight back . Here , I als o examine feminis t effort s t o reform self-defens e law . My participan t observation , interviewing , readin g o f publishe d materials , and analysi s o f self-defense la w familiarized m e wit h self-defens e cultur e an d enabled m e to hav e th e kinds o f discussions I wanted t o hav e wit h th e peopl e I interviewed . Whil e som e o f the women I interviewe d wer e no t in my self defense class , they al l knew tha t I had taken self-defens e an d that I could relat e to wha t the y wer e talkin g to me about. Th e methods I employed hav e helpe d me answe r my original questions abou t how self-defense cultur e challenge s tra ditional notion s o f the gendere d body . The y hav e als o raise d som e ne w ques tions about the relationship o f feminism t o women's popular pleasures and resistance t o rape . Henc e I want t o situat e thi s researc h i n a larger terrai n o f femi -

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nist examination s o f women's engagemen t wit h popula r culture . I suggest tha t my participant observatio n give s me a sense of the pleasure o f self-defense train ing, an d m y identificatio n wit h self-defenser s allow s m e t o avoi d th e distance d skepticism typica l o f man y feminis t studie s o f popula r culture . T o mak e thi s argument, i t will be importan t t o revie w th e way s in whic h feminist s hav e the orized th e relationshi p betwee n wome n an d popula r culture .

Feminism, Women, and Pleasure Feminists hav e increasingl y becom e intereste d i n women' s engagemen t wit h popular cultura l activities . Sinc e a ke y concer n o f mine , an d them e i n self defense, i s women's growin g appreciatio n fo r an d pleasure i n thei r ow n aggres sion, I have paid particular attentio n t o th e ways in which feminis t cultura l ana lysts hav e understoo d women' s relationshi p t o popula r cultur e an d popula r pleasures. Feminis t studie s o f women an d popula r cultur e hav e focuse d o n th e following: th e romanc e nove l (Radwa y 1991) ; soa p opera s (Modlesk i 1982) ; television show s (Flitterman-Lewi s 1987) ; popula r scientifi c knowledg e abou t women's bodie s (Marti n 1992) ; women' s literar y advic e seekin g (Simond s 1992); and specific subculture s o f women engage d with cultura l object s i n som e unique an d interestin g way , suc h a s th e productio n o f "slas h zines " i n whic h Star Trek storie s featur e Kir k an d Spoc k a s lover s (Penle y 1992) . Wit h th e exception o f Penley (ibid.) , studies o f women's popula r pleasure s ofte n see k t o answer the question , Why d o women tak e pleasure in this cultural practice, an d how doe s thi s pleasure serv e patriarcha l an d capitalis t interests ? This is probably wh y feminis t books , consciousness-raisin g groups , and musi c festivals hav e no t bee n considere d popula r cultura l object s worth y o f investiga tion. Whil e Simond s (1992 ) an d n o doub t othe r feminist s hav e ha d thei r world views shaped by these books and activities, they conduct academi c studies of other women, seekin g t o understan d th e taste s o f nonfeminist, nonacademi c women . Indeed, i t i s hard t o imagin e a n articl e explainin g "ho w an d wh y wome n rea d feminist books " o r "ho w an d wh y wome n atten d women' s musi c festivals, " a s such pleasure s ar e alread y see n a s politica l an d appropriate . An g (1988 , 180 ) remarks tha t studies such a s Radway's Reading the Romance (1991) reflect feminis t attempts to "cope " with thos e female pleasure s deemed problematic. As Simond s (1992, 215) puts it, "Writin g abou t cultur e i s done i n th e hop e o f understandin g it better; bu t i t i s also done t o mak e mor e cultur e an d t o articulat e alternatives. " Feminists' cultura l critique s hav e bot h share d an d challenge d variou s theoretica l and epistemologica l legacie s of cultural criticism , suc h a s Marxism.

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For Marxists , th e cultur e industr y disseminate s capitalis t ideology . Th e Marxist critiqu e suggest s tha t capitalis m create s fals e need s tha t peopl e se e a s real. People see k th e satisfactio n o f these create d need s a t the expens e o f seein g themselves as members o f a class with a collective interest that is in conflict wit h capitalist interests . Thi s i s ho w socia l contro l operate s (Marcus e 1964) . Pu t bluntly, peopl e ar e manipulate d cultura l dopes , trappe d int o supportin g thei r own dominatio n b y naivel y followin g th e interest s o f th e economi c machin e (Horkheimer 1974) . "The deceive d masse s are today captivate d b y th e myt h o f success eve n mor e tha n th e successfu l are " (Adorn o an d Horkheime r 1972 , 359). Researcher s mak e suc h imputation s o f fals e consciousnes s mos t ofte n when the y ar e interpreting a group wit h who m the y d o no t identif y (se e Kurz man 1991) . Herein lie s an implicit assumptio n tha t the academi c know s th e liberating trut h abou t popula r cultur e an d i s capabl e o f representing th e interest s of the oppresse d class . Traditional Marxis t theorist s hav e clun g t o a n epistemolog y tha t assume d a privileged standpoin t o n th e part o f the oppressed . Claimin g that all knowledg e is political and socially constructed would, the y feared, win d up maintaining th e status quo . Thus , studie s o f popula r cultur e wer e approache d i n a wa y tha t deconstructed popula r cultur e t o revea l its bourgeois interest s o r "distortion s o f reality." This , o f course , presume s tha t ther e coul d b e a pure resistanc e inde pendent o f distortions, interests, and ideology. Further , thi s perspective assume s that intellectuals , whil e no t necessaril y bein g i n th e positio n o f th e oppressed , can represent th e interest s o f the oppresse d an d ca n therefor e achiev e a n undis torted, o r les s distorte d perspective . Marxist s hav e presume d tha t a n intellec tual's revealin g perspectiv e wa s necessar y becaus e peopl e ar e s o swallowe d u p in a n ideolog y promote d throug h popula r cultur e tha t the y wil l no t develo p a critical consciousness , whic h i s neede d fo r transformativ e socia l action . Th e notion tha t socia l change mus t be preceded b y a critical consciousnes s o r inten t of some sor t i s an assumptio n tha t m y stud y challenges . Many earl y feminist view s of popular cultur e too k a leftist approach . Indeed , the feminis t contemp t fo r beaut y pageant s an d image s o f femininit y i n film, television, pornography , an d advertisin g assume d a n adversaria l relationshi p t o the cultura l powers tha t b e (Dennin g 1991) . For instance , Dougla s (i n Radwa y J 994> 3 ) argue d tha t romanc e novel s wer e par t o f a backlash agains t feminism : "Popular cultur e i s ou t t o ge t th e so-calle d liberate d woman. " Bu t a Marxis t perspective provide s to o limite d a n understandin g o f women' s relationshi p t o popular culture . I wanted t o analyz e self-defens e cultur e withou t th e failing s o f Marxist theories . Therefor e I di d no t intervie w self-defenser s t o "prove " tha t self-defense create d i n wome n a critica l consciousnes s o r a "false " conscious -

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ness. My argumen t tha t self-defens e ca n potentially challeng e rap e cultur e doe s not impl y tha t rap e cultur e change s onc e wome n gai n a critica l consciousnes s of it. I offer a n interpretation o f self-defense cultur e that is not necessaril y share d by those in it. No r d o I consider i t my tas k to decid e whether self-defenser s ar e exercising free wil l o r sociall y determine d choices ; whether the y ar e displayin g resistance o r "playin g int o th e patriarchy" ; o r whethe r the y ar e successfull y enacting resistanc e o r gettin g recuperate d b y capitalism . Some contemporar y feminis t studie s o f wome n an d popula r cultur e main tain som e Marxis t assumption s whil e rejectin g others . Thes e studie s reflec t th e idea tha t women ar e so immersed i n th e patriarcha l ideologie s flowin g throug h romance novel s an d self-hel p book s tha t the y nee d th e hel p o f th e feminis t intellectual t o develo p th e ideologica l maturit y necessar y t o "rechannel " thei r values. Thi s maintain s som e o f the arroganc e o f the intellectual/researche r bu t not quit e a s much a s in traditiona l Marxis t research . Thi s i s because som e fem inist studie s hav e focuse d no t o n wome n wh o hav e bough t fals e need s a s rea l ones, bu t whos e rea l need s ar e treate d a s false. For instance , Simond s (1992 ) argue s tha t advic e t o heterosexua l wome n about ho w t o ge t alon g wit h me n sexuall y involve s invalidatin g wha t man y women wan t sexuall y an d encouragin g the m t o ge t a sexualit y mor e i n lin e with th e sexualit y me n wan t wome n t o have . Simonds ' goa l i s t o validat e women's desires . I n th e cas e o f romanc e novels , Radwa y (1991 ) argue s tha t women d o not get their needs for commitment , affection , an d passion met fro m the me n i n thei r live s an d tha t th e novel s enabl e wome n t o fee l tha t thi s nee d is valid. (Sh e als o hint s tha t wome n shoul d rechanne l thei r need s an d no t us e romance novel s t o mee t them. ) A stric t Marxis t migh t argu e tha t women' s desires fo r faithful , lovin g mal e companionshi p ar e impose d need s tha t onl y keep the m cooperatin g with thei r ow n oppression . Fo r Radway, however , thi s would mis s th e feminis t point . Rathe r tha n claimin g tha t wome n ar e wrongl y taught t o nee d romanc e novel s o r th e value s o f heterosexual commitmen t an d passion expresse d withi n thes e novels , an d tha t women' s liberatio n depend s o n renouncing thos e needs, Radway validate s these needs and argues that women' s use of these cultural objects expresse s needs that do not get met because of patriarchy. Thu s wome n ar e no t necessaril y participatin g i n thei r ow n dominatio n by choosin g t o spen d thei r tim e readin g romanc e novels . Wome n ca n b e see n as resisting patriarchy b y readin g suc h novels . While I was doing m y fieldwork , I began a n intensiv e strength-trainin g an d cardio-endurance program . I ha d bee n a n athlet e i n hig h schoo l an d self defense reminde d m e ho w muc h I enjoye d physica l challenges . I n addition , taking so many self-defens e course s made m e want t o improve m y performanc e

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and reduc e m y chance s o f injury. A colleagu e approache d m e t o inquir e abou t the "self-loathing " I must hav e t o d o weightliftin g an d aerobics . Thi s questio n assumes tha t wome n mus t accoun t fo r th e ver y sam e activitie s fo r whic h me n do no t hav e t o account , tha t wome n engage d i n exercis e form s mus t b e doin g it t o pleas e men , and , further , tha t wome n woul d no t loo k a s pleasing t o me n if they did not go through suc h effort. I t also keeps the things my colleagu e doe s with hi s body—computing , cycling , an d s o on—close d fo r critica l considera tion. I can think o f no woman (o r man) who is not implicated in capitalist, tech nological relations ; a n iron-pumpin g aerobicize r i s not necessaril y mor e impli cated tha n a popcorn-eating moviegoe r o r coffee-drinkin g caf e dweller . There i s no wa y t o escap e capitalism , an d sometime s cultura l studie s schol ars wil l invok e capitalis t relation s t o rejec t a practic e the y d o no t like , whil e ignoring th e inevitabl e capitalis t relation s o f the practice s tha t the y d o no t find problematic. "Capitalis t relations " thu s become s a ne w God-trick : somethin g to invok e whe n on e want s t o hol d someon e accountable . Accusin g a woma n of buying into "patriarcha l relations " works muc h th e sam e way. Furthermore , the charg e tha t subject s ar e naivel y contradictin g themselve s become s a n eas y way t o dismis s one' s researc h subjects . Anothe r wa y t o "prove " one' s subject s wrong i s to cal l the m essentialists . Th e troubl e is , th e decisio n tha t one' s sub jects are naive or wrong about somethin g usually precedes the charge of self-con tradiction o r essentialis m (Smit h 1993) . In sum , althoug h Marxis m provide s a valuable perspectiv e abou t economi c relations tha t canno t b e ignored , man y left-win g cultura l critic s maintain a distrust o f ordinary people , reproduc e th e elitis m inheren t i n th e assumptio n tha t the intellectua l know s best , an d preserv e th e epistemologica l assumption s tha t falsely disconnec t truth/resistanc e from politics/ideology . Th e Marxis t notio n that th e intellectua l ca n determin e whic h need s ar e tru e an d whic h ar e fals e upholds a n ide a tha t authorit y o n thes e politica l matter s shoul d b e lef t t o th e intellectual rathe r tha n t o la y people . Th e Frankfur t school' s assumptio n tha t culture produces certai n kind s o f consciousness an d tha t suc h a consciousness i s the prerequisit e fo r politica l actio n an d socia l chang e i s on e tha t feminis t psy choanalytic an d N e w Left-Birmingha m schoo l studie s o f popular cultur e see m to avoid . The Birmingha m schoo l i n Englan d use s Gramsci' s (1971 ) idea s abou t hegemony bu t reject s th e elitis m o f the Frankfur t School , whic h impute d fals e consciousness an d cultura l dopenes s wheneve r hegemon y wa s discussed . Thi s is perhap s becaus e th e connectio n betwee n individuals ' intention s o r con sciousnesses an d th e large r socia l orde r i s less strict fo r th e Birmingha m schoo l than fo r th e Frankfur t school . Bu t th e N e w Lef t approac h i s not pluralist . Fo r

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Gramsci, hegemony work s throug h th e naturalizatio n o f the ruling class's right to rule. The rule d consen t t o th e arrangemen t becaus e the y se e it as natural an d sensible. Th e Birmingha m School' s approac h t o popula r cultur e ha s involve d studies o f particula r subculture s o f resistance , suc h a s punks , gangs , o r roc k music listeners, and ha s examined th e containmen t an d resistanc e tha t ar e bot h part o f popula r cultura l forms . Unti l recently , mos t o f th e subculture s unde r study hav e bee n male , an d th e theorist s tende d t o exto l thei r revolutionar y virtues whil e ignorin g th e sexis m o f th e subcultures . Muc h feminis t wor k o n women's popula r pleasure s relie s o n a Gramscia n notio n o f ideologica l hege mony, i n whic h women' s practice s wit h whic h the y d o no t agre e o r identif y are rejecte d o n th e ground s tha t th e wome n i n questio n ar e silence d o r other wise unabl e t o d o wha t i s truly i n thei r interest s a s women . One o f Stuart Hall' s meaning s o f popular comes from viewin g cultura l form s in a particular period a s in tensio n wit h th e dominan t culture . Th e focus , then , is "the relatio n betwee n cultur e an d question s o f hegemony" (Hal l 1981 , 235). Popular may mea n th e cultur e o f th e exclude d o r oppressed . Bu t the n thi s ignores peopl e whos e statu s simultaneousl y put s the m i n th e positio n o f oppressed an d oppressor , suc h a s married wome n (whos e gende r subordinatio n and heterosexua l privileg e operat e together) . Further , i n orde r t o fight agains t pornography, wome n hav e employe d th e associatio n betwee n popula r cultur e and th e filthy , lo w cultur e "other " o f hig h culture . Sinc e pornograph y i s pro duced an d consume d primaril y b y th e dominan t group , men , popula r cultur e cannot simpl y b e define d a s tha t whic h i s consume d b y th e oppressed . Ulti mately, Hal l conclude s tha t ther e i s neve r tota l freedom from hegemon y no r total encapsulation . Hall contend s tha t th e popula r i s th e cultur e o f th e people , versu s th e "power-bloc" whic h i s "th e sid e wit h th e cultura l powe r t o decid e wha t belongs an d wha t doe s not " (Hal l 1981 , 23) . Cultura l form s ar e neve r whol e and coherent ; everyon e ha s a n ongoin g dialectica l an d contradictor y engage ment wit h popula r culture . Simond s (1992 ) echoe s thi s notion i n th e introduc tion t o he r boo k o n wome n an d self-hel p literature . Sh e argue s tha t th e con nection between persona l perception an d cultura l ideology is not clea r and sim ple, tha t eve n cultura l object s tha t see m eas y t o rea d an d simila r ar e strikingl y variable whe n yo u not e women' s varie d response s t o suc h cultura l objects . Applying Lacania n theor y t o a societal level , Althusse r argue s tha t ou r sub jectivities develo p throug h th e mirro r o f ideology, o r by reflectin g th e valu e o f others. Cultur e the n become s a place o f political struggl e becaus e i t i s not sim ply determined b y capitalis t relation s but i s complexly involve d wit h identities , ideologies, an d discourses , themselves al l intertwined. Thi s is different from th e

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traditional Marxis t notio n o f false consciousnes s because , fo r Althusser , th e sel f is constructe d an d contradictory . Thus , popula r cultur e i s seen a s neither pro hibiting political action no r necessitatin g it. Ideolog y ca n be use d by the masse s in popula r cultur e t o thei r benefit . This , however , stil l leave s th e researche r with th e authorit y t o decid e whe n somethin g i s to th e masses ' benefit . Muc h feminist concer n ove r women' s us e o f firearms simpl y assume s tha t wha t women se e t o b e i n thei r benefi t i s actually no t (e.g. , Jones 1994) . Given tha t everythin g i s commodified i n consume r capitalis t society , Jameson (1979 ) an d Hal l (1981 ) se e popula r cultur e a s a sit e o f politica l contest , wherein bot h hegemon y an d resistanc e occu r simultaneously . Radwa y (1991 ) uses Jameson's (1979 ) ide a tha t ther e i s alway s implicitl y a Utopian elemen t i n any cultura l produc t t o argu e tha t ther e i s always som e aspec t tha t i s critical o f the socia l order o r Utopian in the romance novel : "I t seems apparent, then , tha t an oppositiona l momen t ca n be sai d to characteriz e eve n th e productio n o f th e romantic stor y i f that proces s i s understood a s the wome n themselve s conceiv e it" (Radwa y 1991 , 214). A popular cultura l for m doe s no t contai n withi n itsel f a certai n meanin g o r value . The researcher' s ow n politica l distinction s sometime s will , however, decid e what count s a s ideolog y an d wha t count s a s Utopia . Fo r instance , doe s th e engagement wit h firearms cultur e (guns , gun clubs , gun magazines, gun lessons, etc.) o n th e par t o f some wome n coun t a s a Utopian impuls e o r i s this th e ide ological repressio n o f thei r feminine/feminis t resistance ? Answerin g thi s ques tion coul d depen d upo n whethe r o r not wome n a s the keeper s o f morality an d "family values " in thei r properl y heterosexua l feminin e role s i s a way o f resist ing patriarchy (henc e guns mean they'r e dupe d by patriarchy) o r a way o f being duped b y patriarchy (erg o gun s mean they'r e resistin g patriarchy). I t coul d als o depend upo n whether o r not women's properly heterosexua l feminin e role s are solidified b y thei r us e o f guns o r challenge d b y thei r us e o f guns. Deciding wha t count s a s resistance an d wha t count s a s hegemony ha s bee n tricky fo r feminists , especiall y becaus e the y hav e criticize d th e arroganc e wit h which researcher s mak e suc h distinctions . However , takin g one' s subject s a t their word , somethin g Radwa y (ibid. ) suggest s make s he r metho d mor e femi nist an d les s authoritarian , mask s a differen t typ e o f arrogance . An y cultura l object i s interpreted b y th e researche r o r thos e mor e directl y engage d wit h it , the researc h subjects . Researc h subject s ar e similarl y interprete d b y th e researcher. Thus, I consider my research feminist precisel y because I do not pre tend tha t m y interpretation s ar e th e sam e a s thos e o f who m I study , no r d o I mask my disagreements as therapeutic concern . Her e is where my identificatio n with self-defenser s become s important .

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The pleasure s o f the peopl e I studied wer e full y apparen t t o me . Tha t I di d not disagre e with th e genera l practices of those I studied make s me less likely t o mask m y disagreement s i n way s tha t ar e ultimatel y onl y superficiall y account able—that is , that explai n awa y th e women' s pleasure s s o a s to clai m tha t the y "really" nee d somethin g othe r tha n tha t wit h whic h the y ar e engaged . Thi s i s not t o say, however, tha t identifying wit h m y research subjects mean s that I will swallow whol e ever y pleasure , chalkin g everythin g u p t o resistance . I d o no t see self-defens e a s a n aren a o f women' s free expressio n i n a n otherwis e mal e dominant world . I see self-defense a s an arena tha t brings to light th e ideologie s that perpetuat e rap e cultur e a s much a s it i s a n aren a i n whic h wome n migh t resist rap e culture . Taking multipl e oppression s an d contradictor y identitie s (suc h a s whit e woman) seriously , which feminist s hav e encouraged, complicate s cultural inter pretation an d render s impossibl e an y simplisti c claim s tha t somethin g i s resist ing. For example , while pop sta r Madonna ca n be see n as challenging images o f femininity (oppresse d woman' s resistance) , thi s i s accomplishe d throug h th e reliance o n a contras t betwee n pur e whit e feminin e innocenc e an d a "nast y blackness" (hook s 1992 , 157 ) (whit e oppressor' s hegemony) . Therefore , embracing aggressio n ma y counte r particularl y whit e standard s o f femininity , while i t ma y b e i n blac k women' s interest s finally t o ge t t o b e see n a s tradi tionally feminin e an d therefor e respectable . I n m y analysi s I hav e trie d t o pa y attention t o th e multipl e location s i n th e powe r structur e tha t an y self-defense r might have , considering the differentia l socia l causes and consequences o f many women's, an d feminism's , uneasines s wit h combativ e bodil y practices . Another approac h t o women' s popula r pleasures , psychoanalysis , addresse s some o f m y concerns . Psychoanalysi s doe s no t problematiz e pleasur e th e wa y that Marxis t approache s have , bu t rathe r argue s tha t resistanc e ca n occu r wit h fantasy, play , an d pleasure . Psychoanalysi s postulate s resistanc e o n th e ground s that th e effect s o f cultur e ar e neve r full y determine d o r predictable . Further , psychoanalysis offer s a n account o f what appeare d t o Marxists to be simple con sent t o oppression . I n psychoanalysis , subjectivit y i s a process, no t a thing from which a process stems . Post-Lacanian psychoanalysi s an d feminis t theor y disrup t cultura l studie s b y reposing question s abou t sexuality , subjectivity , th e unconscious , representa tion, an d language . Psychoanalysi s argue s tha t wome n d o no t naturall y o r eas ily, bu t painfull y an d imperfectly , fit int o roles . Thus , psychoanalysi s reject s simplistic views o f identity an d o f the relationshi p betwee n th e socia l and iden tity. Psychoanalyti c approache s ar e take n no t t o sho w ho w oppressio n i s inter nalized, bu t t o sho w ho w oppressio n i s resisted. A s Rose (1986 ) remarks , psy -

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choanalysis provide s a basi s fo r discussin g th e incoherenc e an d contradictor y character o f identities an d thu s th e impossibilit y o f total indoctrination . Many popula r cultur e scholar s comin g from a psychoanalyti c perspectiv e have spen t tim e debunkin g th e leftis t myt h tha t psychoanalysi s i s inherend y conservative becaus e i t individualize s collectiv e problems . D e Certea u (1984 ) argues tha t psychoanalysi s help s t o undermin e th e authorit y o f th e researcher . Thus, th e researche r listen s t o th e researc h subjects , rathe r tha n imposin g he r interpretive framewor k ont o he r subjects . Lik e a psychoanalyst , th e schola r researching a grou p consumin g som e popula r cultura l objec t mus t bewar e o f the influenc e o f her ow n fantasie s an d omissions . Also , th e researche r mus t b e able t o stud y popula r cultur e i n a way tha t wil l enabl e he r t o lear n mor e abou t her ow n politica l commitment s an d identifications . Fo r instance , feminis t researchers o f popular cultur e hav e note d tha t the y hav e ha d t o tak e women' s tastes an d activitie s seriously , reexamin e thei r ow n assumption s abou t suc h activities, an d possibly rechanne l thei r feminism . Further , becaus e popula r cul ture operate s a t a subconscious leve l i n additio n t o a consciou s level , psycho analysis is particularly importan t fo r popula r cultur e studies . Penley (1989 , 178 ) suggest s tha t feminism' s relianc e o n th e reifie d categor y "woman" i s perhaps th e greates t obstacl e t o th e acceptanc e o f psychoanalysis . By arguin g tha t ther e i s n o universa l feminin e essence , psychoanalysi s ma y threaten traditiona l feminists . However , som e feminis t skepticis m o f psycho analysis may be based less on a push toward essentialis m and more o n a n uneasi ness wit h wha t the y perceiv e t o b e psychoanalyti c theory' s ow n essentialism . Flitterman-Lewis (1987 , 173 ) says that psychoanalysis "seek s to analyz e the fun damental structure s o f desire tha t underli e al l human activity. " T o som e femi nists, thi s statement ma y reflec t a n unnecessar y essentialis m an d absolutism . I want t o analyze femininity, particularl y in the women's self-defens e move ment, a s a n ideologica l categor y withou t makin g th e totalizin g clai m tha t women (o r men , fo r tha t matter ) ar e b y natur e aggressive . Pu t differendy , i t i s possible t o analyz e th e politica l stake s o f seein g wome n a s aggressiv e o r no t without claimin g tha t the y are inherendy anything . Thi s migh t b e th e mor e complex vie w o f subjectivity, whic h i s still compatible wit h feminis t politics . Psychoanalytic approache s t o popula r cultur e hav e historicall y bee n les s squeamish abou t pleasure , fantasy , an d pla y tha n othe r approaches . Feminis t cultural criticis m has contributed t o women's feeling s o f guilt about "politicall y incorrect" fantasie s o r desires . Politicall y incorrec t desire s ar e thos e tha t femi nists have assumed should be painful. Feminist s have said that domination i s bad because it is painful, thereb y framing pleasur e as the ultimate good . I n so doing , feminists the n troubl e themselve s wit h women' s pleasur e i n th e "wrong "

Appendix: Conceiving the Kick of Self-Defense | 22 9 things. Whil e traditiona l feminis t critique s inadvertentl y polic e women' s plea sures, steerin g the m i n th e "right " direction , psychoanalysi s urge s feminis m t o change i n respons e t o women' s pleasures , no t th e othe r wa y around . Feminists hav e als o assumed tha t political endeavor s ar e public, an d no t par ticularly pleasurabl e o r playfu l (henc e Radway' s misgiving s abou t th e privat e pleasures o f romanc e novels) . Thi s i s especiall y tru e fo r politica l resistanc e t o horrendous, violent , an d deadl y seriou s matter s suc h a s sexua l violence . Tha t the pleasure s o f th e wome n I studie d tak e plac e i n th e contex t o f violenc e against women—a subjec t tha t is supposed t o be serious and concerned wit h th e harms an d injurie s t o women—migh t exacerbat e th e concer n surroundin g women's popula r pleasure s an d resistanc e t o domination . Feminis t psycho analysis rejects th e assumptio n tha t "real " socia l chang e i s separate fro m fantas y or from pleasure . Penley's (1992 ) stud y o f women Star Trek fanzine writer s ask s what feminis m ca n learn fro m th e pleasures women experienc e consumin g an d producing eroti c storie s o f two mal e medi a characters . Thus psychoanalysi s ca n make roo m fo r storie s abou t resistance , an d w e ca n imagin e tha t self-defensers ' activities ar e n o les s politically significan t fo r bein g persona l an d pleasurable . A final authorit y issu e t o conside r i s th e researcher' s relationshi p wit h pro ducers an d consumer s o f popular culture . Researcher s ma y participat e i n shap ing th e agenda s o f th e group s the y study . Thi s i s because , a s Simond s (1992 ) notes, popular cultur e studie s themselve s becom e par t o f popular culture . Thu s an ongoin g reflexivit y ma y develo p whereb y thos e engage d wit h particula r popular cultura l object s se e themselve s accountabl e t o thei r respectiv e ethnog raphers. Radwa y (1994 , 14 ) discusse s th e recen t change s i n th e romanc e nove l genre: " I se e grea t ambivalenc e a t th e hear t o f recen t romance s a s the genre' s writers attemp t t o thin k throug h th e apparen t contradictio n betwee n a mor e active an d autonomou s feminin e identit y an d traditiona l assumption s tha t rela tionality an d connectednes s ar e no t onl y woman' s wor k bu t woman' s desir e as well." Similarly , romanc e writer s wh o onc e claime d the y wer e writin g harm less escap e storie s no w fanc y themselve s a s active participant s i n socia l chang e through th e narratio n o f pleasurable fantasie s abou t newl y imagine d individu als an d relationship s (ibid. , 7) . Eve n i f Radwa y i s no w arguin g tha t romanc e novels ca n teac h feminis m tha t emotiona l connectednes s an d assertivenes s ca n go togethe r i n women' s lives , feminis m ha s obviousl y taugh t romanc e writer s new possibilities for male and female characters . (Th e latter, not th e former, wa s Radway's origina l focus. ) While critica l ethnographer s an d popula r cultur e scholar s have been explici t about thei r goal s o f shapin g th e directio n o f variou s movement s an d subcul tures, the y see m les s willing t o tak e responsibilit y fo r thei r influenc e onc e the y

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see it happening. After all , is it not possible that Radway's work provided a new narrative fo r romanc e writers ? Thi s i s no t necessaril y a ba d thing , a s long a s researchers acknowledg e havin g such effect s o n the cultural forms abou t whic h they write . Thus , acknowledgin g tha t th e researche r migh t becom e a ne w source fo r the meaning o f cultural object s t o their consumer s i s important. Donna Harawa y (1991 , 309 ) has remarked tha t researc h i s like " a modernis t work o f art," in which we interpret event s and shape a culture in a way we find pleasing. A s critical ethnography , m y project i s not simpl y a representation o f the movemen t I set out to study but an active intervention i n and shaping o f it. As a researcher, I create d a story tha t coul d influenc e th e directio n th e activi ties I studied take . Th e larger politica l contex t tha t make s som e consequence s of self-defens e (lik e servin g a jail sentence ) mor e likel y tha n other s wil l hel p determine th e outcom e o f th e self-defens e community , bu t s o als o wil l m y intervention i n the community. Therefore , question s abou t how the researcher influences th e direction o f the grou p sh e studies and how she can do this mor e consciously an d explicitly ar e crucial. My insider status has enabled me to make explicit my desire to shape the selfdefense movemen t i n particular ways. Many of the self-defense instructor s I met read Her Wits about Her (Caignon an d Groves 1987 ) and Stopping Rape (Bar t and O'Brien 1985) , an d expressed grea t interes t i n readin g m y wor k whe n i t was complete. Thoug h I initially feare d tha t instructor s woul d b e skeptical whe n I told the m I would b e writing a book o n women's self-defense , i t became clea r that the y wer e gla d tha t someon e wa s finally writin g about , theorizing , an d sharing with other s the important work the y were doing . Because self-defenser s are an eager audience for my work, I realize that I am in a position t o influenc e the directio n o f the self-defens e movement . Not onl y coul d th e final product o f my researc h hel p shap e th e self-defens e movement, bu t th e researc h proces s itsel f wa s a n interventio n i n self-defens e culture. Fo r instance, i n orde r t o se e a particular self-defens e videotape , I had to reques t tha t m y neighborhood vide o stor e stoc k th e video. M y enthusiasti c discussions o f my researc h prompte d severa l friends, students , and colleagues to seek instructio n i n som e for m o f self-defense. I becam e a n advocat e fo r self defense. I was one of a few students t o demonstrate self-defens e technique s fo r a loca l televisio n new s spot . Th e organizatio n the n use d a videotap e o f thi s broadcast a s a promotiona l devic e i n Europe . M y investigatio n no t onl y involved m y ow n transformation—namely, usin g gun s tha t I' d alway s refuse d to, strengt h trainin g a t a gym, learning som e form s o f martial arts , and learning to delive r knockout blows—bu t als o involved m y monetary suppor t o f a num ber o f organizations t o whic h I wouldn't normall y belong . Durin g th e cours e

Appendix: Conceiving the Kick of Self-Defense | 23 1 of the study , I belonged t o th e Nationa l Women' s Martia l Art s Federation , th e National Rifl e Association , an d the Pacifi c Associatio n fo r Women i n the Mar tial Arts , an d I subscribe d t o American Rifleman, Fighting Woman News, th e National Women' s Martia l Art s Federatio n newletter , Self-Defense and Empowerment News, an d Women and Guns. However , m y study was not financially sup ported o r endorse d b y an y o f these groups .

Conclusion Social scientifi c knowledg e i s an instrument o f political power (Brow n 1987) . I have trie d t o procee d wit h thi s kin d o f methodological conscience . I want thi s work, a s feminist research , t o be clear about my values and desires (t o the exten t I ca n eve n kno w the m [se e Gordo n 1990]) . I hav e create d a stor y abou t self defense tha t I want people to consider. I have woven th e experiences and event s of Real Knockouts into a story tha t coul d hav e bee n wove n togethe r differently , along differen t dimension s reflectin g differen t politica l commitments . I investigate d self-defens e no t becaus e involve d wit h i t ar e a grou p o f women wh o ar e smarter o r freer o r mor e feminis t tha n others , but becaus e i t is an exciting place where traditiona l discours e i s exposed an d reworked. Ther e i s no for m o f popular recreatio n tha t is authentic o r pure o r free fro m powe r rela tions. Whil e som e ma y hav e expecte d tha t thi s stud y o f women's engagemen t with self-defense , particularl y thei r engagemen t wit h firearms, woul d involv e the problematizatio n o f thei r pleasur e an d a n accompanyin g explanatio n o f what wen t wron g t o mak e the m enjo y wha t the y ar e doing , I sought t o appre ciate women's enjoymen t o f all forms o f self-defense trainin g critically . I hav e examine d a grou p wit h who m I identify . M y reluctanc e t o se e th e members o f th e self-defens e communit y a s completel y sociall y determine d fits Kurzman's (1991 ) observations that field workers tend to impute free will to thos e groups wit h who m the y identif y whil e assumin g thos e wit h who m the y d o no t identify ar e victims o f social force s beyon d thei r control . Feminis t cultura l stud ies hav e ofte n investigate d th e "fals e beliefs " o f ideologica l enemies . Academi c interpretations o f women handgu n advocates , for instance , hav e been conducte d by those who d o not identify (see , e.g., Jones 1994) . Predictably, suc h women ar e construed a s naive dupe s unde r th e contro l o f patriarchal organizations . Elshtain (1981 , 312 ) laments th e arrogan t attitud e wit h whic h feminist s hav e approached thei r femal e adversarie s i n th e Right-to-Lif e movement . Wha t sh e suggests i s relevant fo r an y feminis t attemp t t o understan d wome n wh o d o no t identify a s feminist o r wome n wit h who m feminist s d o no t alway s agree :

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Without allowin g Right-to-Lif e wome n t o spea k th e trut h a s the y understand it ; withou t engagin g the m fro m a stanc e tha t respect s thei r human possibilit y fo r th e creatio n o f meanin g throug h uncoerce d dia logue, whic h require s o f the investigato r a stance o f empathy , openness , and a willingness t o entertai n an d explor e alternative s sh e may no t share , [feminists] wil l continu e t o trea t the m i n distorted , presumptuous , an d prejudicial ways . My exploratio n o f women' s self-defens e cultur e i s usefu l precisel y becaus e I identify wit h th e carna l pleasure s o f learnin g t o resis t sexua l violence . Tha t identification ha s prompted th e particular analysis I offer; i t puts me i n the posi tion t o understand , an d pas s on, th e "kick " o f self-defense .

Notes

NOTES T O TH E PREFAC E

1. Lists, update d periodically , o f self-defens e program s an d othe r resource s fo r women ar e availabl e ove r th e telephon e a t 1-800-345-KICK ; m Women and Guns magazine eac h month ; an d ove r th e interne t a t http://galaxy.tradewave.com/edi tors/weiss/SDtheory.html. 2. The National Coalition agains t Sexual Assault also offers guideline s for choos ing a self-defense progra m ove r th e interne t a t http://galaxy.tradewave.com/edi tors/ weiss/NC AS AGuidelines. html. 3. Se e Dworki n (1974 , 174-93 ; !979 » 14-15 ) an d MacKinno n (1987 , 117-19 ; 1989, 90-93, 112-14 ) f° r their explicit statements about the political construction o f sex categories in a system of compulsory heterosexuality. Early radical feminism di d contain mor e essentialis t elements , however . Fo r example , Susa n Brownmille r (1975, 4 ) suggeste d tha t rap e i s connected wit h "man' s structura l capacit y t o rap e and woman' s correspondin g structura l vulnerability, " a n ide a that , althoug h no t intended t o sugges t tha t rap e i s natural o r inevitable , was , a s Echols (1989 ) notes , later criticize d b y othe r radica l feminist s fo r it s failur e t o recogniz e rap e culture' s influence o n ho w w e conceptualiz e sexe d bodies. 4. The appendix provides a detailed account o f the methods of investigation an d political concern s informing th e study . NOTES T O TH E I N T R O D U C T I O N

i. Th e publicit y surroundin g thi s attack ha d muc h t o d o with th e fact s tha t th e victim was white an d middle-class an d that the perpetrators were black and Latino. Evidence for thi s position i s that twenty-eight othe r first-degree rape s or attempte d rapes too k plac e i n Ne w Yor k Cit y tha t sam e wee k abou t whic h w e didn' t hea r much, i f anythin g (Terr y 1989 , 25) . Tw o week s afte r th e Centra l Par k attack , a black woman wa s beaten an d raped a t knife poin t b y two men . Tha t suc h case s do not receiv e nationa l attentio n indicate s th e racis t biase s informin g assumption s o f who ca n be victimized an d who ca n be aggressors. 2. I regard research that strips data on violent act s of their context an d uses them to clai m that wome n an d me n ar e equally violen t (e.g. , Strauss and Gelle s 1990 ) as

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less credibl e tha n othe r researc h tha t indicate s tha t m e n victimiz e w o m e n fa r mor e than vic e vers a (se e Dobas h e t al . 1992) . 3. Tha t masculinit y an d violenc e ar e fa r from incongruou s doe s no t mea n tha t all m e n ar e see n a s th e sam e kin d o f potentially violen t agent . Blac k m e n ar e mor e likely t o b e see n a s potentia l agent s o f illegitimat e violenc e agains t white s an d o f legitimate violenc e agains t blac k w o m e n , whil e whit e men' s violenc e stand s a bet ter chanc e o f bein g perceive d a s legitimate, perio d (Marcu s 1992 , 392) . Blac k m e n have bee n demonize d a s inappropriately aggressive , eve n w h e n thei r socia l positio n kept the m fro m bein g particularl y dangerou s o r threatening . Further , the y hav e been aggressivel y punishe d fo r th e sam e aggressio n (eve n i f they wer e innocent ) tha t white m e n hav e practice d wit h impunity . T h e ide a durin g Reconstructio n tha t white w o m e n wer e i n dange r o f rape fro m blac k m e n serve d t o justify whit e men' s control o f blac k men . W h i t e m e n inflicte d violence—ofte n sexua l violenc e i n th e form o f castration—against blac k m e n fo r supposedl y attackin g whit e w o m e n . Thi s was routinel y th e justificatio n fo r lynching , a for m o f racis t socia l contro l (Davi s 1983, 172-201) . Thi s victimizatio n o f blac k men , rationalize d b y racis t ideologie s and institutions , ha s le d som e t o sugges t tha t racis m "emasculates " th e blac k m a n — precisely becaus e o f the lin k betwee n masculinit y an d violen t agency , o n on e hand , and femininit y an d bein g violate d o n th e other . 4. Thi s definitio n o f rap e culture , adapte d fro m Buchwald , Fletcher , an d R o t h (1993), i s mean t t o avoi d a narro w definitio n whic h migh t exclud e form s o f mal e violence tha t w o m e n commonl y experienc e an d fear , an d tha t ar e a s b o u nd u p wit h normative gende r expectation s a s rap e is . Henc e "rap e culture " denote s a cultur e that no t onl y support s an d excuse s rap e bu t als o w o m a n beating , incest , an d othe r forms o f sexual assault . Suc h crime s hav e bee n deeme d "gender-motivate d assaults " by th e Judiciary Committe e o n th e Violenc e Agains t W o m e n Ac t o f 199 0 becaus e they ar e no t simpl y individua l o r persona l injurie s bu t rathe r gender-motivate d forms o f discriminatio n (Bide n 1990 , 40-41) . 5. A n importan t exceptio n mus t b e note d here . Mos t rape s ar e intraracia l (a s ar e most violen t crime s mor e generally ) an d committe d agains t someon e th e assailan t knows (Unite d State s Departmen t o f Justice 1993 , 30-31). But unde r statisticall y les s probable circumstances , suc h a s w h e n a ma n sexuall y assault s a strange r o r whe n a male ethni c minorit y assault s a whit e woman , th e ac t o f rap e i s mor e likel y t o b e seen a s aggressiv e an d inappropriat e an d a woman' s self-defense , i f i t occurs , i s regarded wit h les s skepticism . I t shoul d als o b e note d tha t FB I dat a ar e somewha t misleading becaus e s o man y dat e an d acquaintanc e rape s ar e no t eve n reporte d t o the police . 6. Unfortunately , statistica l dat a tha t lea d t o an y definitiv e answer s t o question s about h o w ofte n an d h o w effectivel y w o m e n us e weapon s i n self-defens e hav e no t been collected . Fo r instance , th e 199 3 Nationa l Crim e Victimizatio n Surve y (NCVS) provide s som e informatio n o n defensiv e response s t o sexua l assailants , which suggest s tha t self-protectiv e measure s hel p th e situatio n i n mos t cases , but w e

Notes to Chapter 1 | 2 3 5 can only assume that those are responses by women (see , e.g., United States Department o f Justice 1993 , 73, 77). Crime victim s were surveye d abou t th e effectivenes s of the resistanc e strategie s the y use d agains t thei r attackers , bu t such response s are not code d b y sex of resister (ibid. , 76-77) . Based o n NCV S dat a fo r recen t years , Roth (1994 , 4-5) found tha t 3 0 percent o f all surviving assault victims were injured , 27 percent o f assault victims who did not resist attacker s in any way were injured , and 1 2 percent o f assault victims who used a firearm to resist attackers were injured . Of course , because response s are not coded b y sex of resister, we cannot conclud e anything about the use of firearms for self-defense amon g women specifically . Tha t this dat a i s not ofte n divide d b y se x indicates tha t th e ide a tha t wome n wil l b e endangered i f they use a firearm in self-defense i s merely hearsay . 7. Although I argue tha t th e self-defense movemen t ca n impact Nort h Ameri can cultur e a s a whole, I do not attempt t o argue tha t wome n outsid e o f the self defense movemen t ar e affected i n the same ways as women who have taken up selfdefense. NOTES T O CHAPTE R I

i. Th e sexual organ s an d brains o f men wer e though t t o be competin g i n the same way. Men, however, wer e directe d t o use the energy o f their brain s (Ehren reich and English 1978 , 126) . 2. Thoma s assume d tha t th e premarital se x was consensual, ignorin g th e reality of rape and reinforcing th e punishment o f women fo r rape. 3. Of course, sexology and psychoanalysis are discourses tha t als o made possibl e the deconstructio n o f the ver y categorie s the y established , a s they gav e "deviants " something wit h whic h t o identify, mobiliz e aroun d politically , an d eventually cri tique. Fo r instance , th e professiona l discours e o f psychoanalysi s migh t no w b e invoked t o justify a s normal a woman's aggression , sexua l interest in other women , or desire for "favorable notice , distinction , an d freedom. " 4. Se e Haraway 1989 ; Longino 1991 ; and Martin 199 2 for feminist critique s of specific scientifi c account s o f sex difference . 5. Perhap s becaus e sh e so accurately capture s ho w men experience, an d rationalize, thei r ow n superiority, Dworki n i s often see n a s believing i t herself, and is therefore accuse d o f espousing th e very biologis m tha t sh e is trying t o expos e as patriarchal myth . I hav e cite d Dworki n an d MacKinno n extensivel y her e alon g with Marcu s precisel y becaus e I see their wor k a s compatible. MacKinno n (1987 , 49) argue s tha t sexualit y (it s predominant structur e i s heterosexuality ) i s a socia l process tha t create s desir e and , while i t is taken fo r a natural essence , create s men and women . MacKinno n historicize s th e patriarcha l constructio n o f th e femal e body as a violable, occupiable space . She also comments tha t women's self-defense , far fro m bein g futile—whic h sh e would hav e t o believ e i f she reall y di d propos e "essentialized conception s o f female an d male sexualities " (Gaten s 1996 , 78)—can

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change the way women understand their bodies and selves. No doub t MacKinnon' s years practicin g karat e groun d he r claim s a s much a s he r radica l constructionis m does (se e MacKinnon 1987 , 117-24) . 6. Thi s mal e fantas y i s depicte d i n th e extrem e i n mainstrea m heterosexua l pornography, i f only becaus e i t i s more explicit . I n suc h films, commonl y a ma n enters a room in which women t o whom he has no emotional connection an d wh o are usually far more attractive than he devour him sexually and enjoy the very things which make him sexually aroused. Or , th e plot may involve the kidnaping, entrap ment, o r "innocent" discover y of already enslaved women who m th e male protagonists the n devou r sexuall y t o th e women' s grea t delight . Tha t th e wome n ar e trapped, tie d up , bound, o r gagge d i s simply excitin g fo r th e wome n i n th e story . This is how mainstream pornography perpetuates as erotic fantasy what men in real life forc e upo n women . 7. Africa n America n me n wer e ofte n represente d i n films an d earl y televisio n shows a s asexual, nonthreatenin g clown s (i.e. , the "happ y darky") , an d sometime s as sexual threat s t o whit e wome n (who , before bein g raped, woul d eithe r commi t suicide or be saved by a white hero). However, a s more black men have represented themselves, suc h representation s ofte n compet e wit h thos e o f white me n fo r thei r sexual and aggressive heroism . 8. The murde r count s in th e Unifor m Crim e Report s exclud e thos e murders b y law enforcement officer s an d private citizens that are legally deemed justifiable homi cide. Ex-spouses ar e included i n the categor y "spouses, " hence thes e figures include those murdered b y ex-husband s an d ex-wives . Thes e U CR dat a for 199 4 vary little from dat a for 1995 , which are still tentative, and for 1993 . It is worth notin g that statistics comparing the percentages of female and male murder victims killed by intimates (instead of comparing raw numbers of intimate murders, as I have done) ar e misleading because far more men are murdered than women eac h year. Comparing percentages tells us that 2 8 percent o f female murde r victim s and 3 percent o f male murde r victims are killed by romantic partners, married o r not (Unifor m Crim e Report s fo r the United States 1994). Even if such figures don't really tell us how violent husband s and boyfriend s ar e relative t o wive s an d girlfriends , the y d o poin t t o women' s rela tively greater likelihood t o be victimized by an intimate. In 1995 , U.S. women wer e six times mor e likel y tha n me n t o b e th e victi m o f violence committe d b y a n inti mate, an d moreover , wome n wer e mor e ofte n injure d whe n victimize d b y a n inti mate's violenc e tha n whe n victimize d b y a stranger's violence (U.S . Department o f Justice 1995 , 3). 9. The Olympic Game s tested female athletes for sex by physical inspection from 1936 through th e 1960s , and throug h th e presen t b y employin g bucca l smear s an d chromatin screenin g to determin e th e chromosoma l karyotyp e o f female competi tors (Col e 1994 , 20). 10. Garcia' s convictio n o f second-degre e murde r wa s overturne d o n appea l because the judge ha d made a n error in the jury's instructions regardin g reasonabl e

Notes to Chapter 4 | 23 7 doubt. At the new trial, Garcia's lawyer argued tha t she acted in self-defense, tryin g to prevent th e "somethin g worse" which ma y have meant murde r (Gillespi e 1989 , 75). 11. Gardne r (1990) , however , ignore s th e se t o f rap e preventio n advic e tha t i s implicitly o r explicitl y connecte d wit h a feminist understandin g o f sexual violenc e and gender , whic h I discuss her e last . Thus , th e self-protectio n advic e sh e covers , and with whic h wome n ar e familiar, i s similar to the police pamphlets and the selfdefense instructio n book s like the m tha t I discuss here first . 12. I hav e no t provide d th e pag e number s o f thi s bookle t from whic h I hav e taken quotation s becaus e th e booklet i s not numbered . NOTE T O CHAPTE R 3

i. Thi s handou t i s taken fro m The New Assertive Woman (Bloom, Coburn , an d Pearlman 1975 , 23). NOTES T O CHAPTE R 4

i. Th e ra w numbe r o f fatal firearm s accident s increase d 8 percent fro m 199 2 t o 1993, mostl y du e t o a 1 5 percent increas e amon g person s betwee n th e age s o f fifteen and twenty-four (Nationa l Center for Health Statistics 1996). The fatal firearm s accident rat e was lower tha n th e rat e o f other fata l accident s fo r al l persons includ ing poisonings (3.3) , fires (1.5), drownings (1.5) , and chokings on an ingested objec t (1.2) (ibid.) . It should als o be noted tha t th e Children' s Defens e Fun d claime d tha t 5,751 children die d firearm-related death s in 199 3 because they included nineteen year-olds and under as "children." The actual number was 5,715, and 4,758 of those deaths wer e i n th e fifteen- t o nineteen-year-ol d category , whic h include s 3,08 2 homicides, 1,27 3 suicides , 32 1 accidents, and 8 2 unexplained . 2. This figure includes deaths from commonl y recognize d poisons , drugs, med icines, mushrooms , an d shellfish , bu t exclude s death s fro m spoile d foods , salmo nella, etc. , which ar e classified a s deaths from diseases . 3. Som e (e.g. , Hekma n 1995 , 195 ) equat e radica l feminis m wit h cultura l femi nism, citing , fo r instance , Mar y Daly' s (1978 ) condemnatio n o f male wom b env y and celebratio n o f female differenc e a s a political principle—which Dal y call s radical feminism. A s Echols (1989 ) has noted, man y contemporar y cultura l feminist s o f the 1970 s define d themselve s a s radica l feminists , th e grou p fro m whic h the y emerged an d departed . An d o f course form s o f feminism overlap . Thi s make s dis tinguishing feminis t camp s difficult . I n th e framewor k I us e here, Dal y i s clearly a cultural feminist becaus e of her insistence on feminis m a s a spiritual movement tha t creates a revolutionary femal e "counterworld " i n opposition t o masculinist culture . 4. Bowker studie s women wh o hav e been abuse d ove r several months o r years. If th e wome n wh o immediatel y lef t o r stoppe d batterin g relationship s wer e

238 |

Notes to Chapter 5

included i n thi s study, he r statistica l dat a o n th e ineffectivenes s o f counterviolenc e might be different. Moreover , Bowker's study did not control for the severity of the threats or fighting on the part of the battered women. Thus we do not know exactl y which kind s of counterviolence ar e most likely t o be effective . 5. In her study of violence among the Australian Aboriginal people of Mangrove (a fictitiou s nam e fo r th e Arnhe m Lan d community) , Burban k (1994 ) find s tha t aggression ca n b e a dramatic bodil y means fo r speakin g abou t relationships , an d as such even enjoyed. I n the small community o f Mangrove, where the people live in the public gaze, aggression has specified limits. Further, relationships are understood as organic processes "that can overcome many perturbations" (ibid., 96), rather than (as in th e Western framework ) thing s that ca n be broken easil y by aggression . 6. Se e Gibso n (1994 ) o n paramilitar y cultur e an d it s relationshi p t o mas s mur derers, combat pisto l shooting, an d argument s ove r gu n control . NOTES T O CHAPTE R 5

i. Self-defens e doe s no t sugges t tha t me n ar e emotionall y incapabl e o f rape; its first priorit y i s not th e exculpatio n o f me n fro m thei r positio n i n a system o f se x inequality. 2. Summarie s o f wha t eac h stat e i s doin g wit h fund s provide d b y th e Violenc e Against Women Act is available on the internet through the Violence Against Women Grants Office a t http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/VAWGO / 3. Se e McCaughey an d Kin g (1995 ) fo r th e proposal tha t rap e prevention edu cators emplo y th e unconventiona l approac h o f screenin g women' s violen t actio n instead o f eroticized victimization . 4. Hele n Zahav i hope s tha t he r boo k Dirty Weekend (1991) wil l hav e thi s sam e effect. Th e femal e reveng e novel' s mai n character , Bella , break s int o th e hom e o f the man who'd been harassing her by telephone and beats him to death with a hammer. Th e book' s plo t involve s Bella' s movin g o n t o mor e violenc e agains t mor e sexist men. Th e autho r wants men t o approac h wome n differently , an d think s tha t they woul d i f they feare d th e consequence s tha t th e me n i n he r boo k fac e a t th e hands of Bella. In response to some who ar e horrified b y the book's fantasy o f violent retaliation, Zahav i declares , "It's not a liberal book, it' s not saying , 'understan d these men,' it' s saying, 'eliminat e them ' an d that's a very frightening ide a for man y people, very foreign. I believe that if the state doesn't protect th e weakest member s of society, they hav e a complete righ t t o protec t themselves . . . . Feminine behav iour i s rooted i n th e fea r o f offending th e male , bruising hi s ego an d arousin g hi m to violence. I wanted t o revers e tha t situation" (quote d i n Gran t 1994 , 4). Zahavi' s book is not evidence that "relations between me n and women see m to have turne d murderous," a s Gran t (1994 , 3 ) suggests . On e significan t differenc e betwee n Zahavi's book and Bret Easton Ellis's book American Psycho (1991) is that men's fan tasies of violence agains t wome n ar e politically, legally , economically , an d sociall y

Notes to Chapter 5 |

23 9

legitimated throug h network s o f power , wherea s women' s fantasie s o f violenc e against men ar e not (Gaten s 1996 , 147) . 5. Hart discusses this issue in the context of a discussion of Aileen Wuornos, wh o was found guilt y an d sentence d t o deat h fo r th e murde r o f seven men . Regardles s of the innocence o r guilt of Wuornos, Hart's point about Wuornos's defens e surel y is valid for les s controversial case s of women's self-defensiv e violence . 6. I t i s true, a s Kelman (1991 , 815 ) notes , tha t th e average subwa y self-defense r may kill many innocents by mistakenly judging them, perhaps solely on th e basis of their race , a s letha l criminals , whil e th e average battere d wif e self-defense r wh o makes th e sam e judgmental erro r an d kill s a man wh o wa s not abou t t o kil l her is still killin g a n establishe d assaulter . Fo r m y purposes , Kelman' s poin t tha t wome n are not construe d a s having agency i s the mos t relevan t one .

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Index

Aalfs, Janet: martia l art s course , 80-82 ; o n media portraya l o f w o m e n , 94 ; o n rol e models fo r w o m e n , 98 ; o n storie s o f tri u m p h an d survival , 101 ; Valle y W o m e n ' s Martia l Arts , Inc. , 80-82 ; o n w o m e n b e c o m i n g themselves , 115 ; o n w o m e n ' s attitud e towar d aggression , 9 2 abortion, 156 , 179 , 231—3 2 Aces: Iron Eagle HI (film) , 18 5 acquaintance rape : incidenc e of , 85 ; men' s perspective of , 31-32 ; a s no t reported , 234n. 5 ; rap e preventio n educatio n p r o grams on , 181 ; self-defense trainin g on , 95 A d o r n o , T h e o d o r , 22 2 advertisments, toug h w o m e n in , 15 9 aerobics, 87 , 163-6 4 Aerobic Self-Defense Workout (video) , 8 7 Aerobox, 8 7 African Americans . See blac k men ; blac k women agency: o f th e body , 119-20 , 201 ; bod y excluded from , i n liberalism , 165-66 ; o f w o m e n , 15—16 , 138 , 190 ; o f w o m e n and victimization , xii—xiii , 196 ; w o m e n ' s sexual , 15—16 , 148 , 15 0 aggression: an d masculinity , 19 , 2 7 - 2 8 , 178 , 196; rap e an d self-defens e la w acceptin g men's, 44—50 ; self-defense manual s on , 50-57; sexua l differenc e marke d by , 2 - 3 ; social meanin g of , 157 , 238n . 5 ; w o m e n and m e n seein g differently , 14 . See also combat; femal e aggression ; violenc e AIDS, 6 Aliens (film) , 17 6 Allen, Hilary , 190 , 196-9 7 Allen, Jeffner, 2 1 , 17 9 Alpert,Jane, 14 5 Althusser, Louis , 225-2 6

American Psycho (Ellis) , 238n . 4 American Rifleman (magazine) , 9 1 , 102 , 17 5 Ang, Ien , 22 1 anger: holdin g back , 213 ; rechanneling , 109-10, 127 ; reclaimin g of , a s w o m e n ' s therapeutic practice , 1 2 animal frolics , 81 , n o A P I N (Assaul t Preventio n Informatio n N e t w o r k ) , 219 ; W e b site , 21 9 Are You a Target? A Guide to Self-Protection, Personal Safety, and Rape Prevention (Fein), 56-5 7 Aristotle, 2 7 Armed and Female (Quigley) , 73 , 16 4 arms. See weapon s Asian America n w o m e n , 127 , 19 5 Assault Preventio n Informatio n N e t w o r k (APIN), 219 ; W e b s i t e , 21 9 athletics. See sport s Attitude: Commonsense Defense for Women (Sliwa), 56 , 57 , 134 , 21 8 attractiveness, feminine . See feminin e attractiveness Australian Aboriginals , 238n . 5 Ayoob, Masaad , 102 , 10 8 bands, 5 , 14-15 , 184 , 18 7 Bandura, Albert , 10 2 Barringer, David , 4 1 Barrow, R o b e r t H . , 2 1 Bart, Paulin e B. , ix , 9 , 11 , 4 3 - 4 4, 53 , 127 , 230 Bateman, Py , 5 7 Bates, Lyn : o n fea r o f guns , 92 ; o n l o n g term solution s t o violence , 135 ; o n M o d e l Mugging , 111 ; on responsibl e gun use , 141 ; on self-defens e c o n t i n u u m , i n , 175 ; o n shootin g u n d e r stressful conditions , 10 8

257

258 I

Index

battered women' s shelters : dearth of , 193; self-defense trainin g in, 17, 21 1 Battered Women' s Syndrom e (BWS) , 190-92, 197 , 19 9 battering: battered wome n a s survivors, 193-94; battered wome n psychiatrized , 17; as control mechanism , 10 ; counterviolence, 154-55 , 237n. 4; feminin e traits as response to , 44; leaving the battering relationship, 193 , 196; as physical abuse rather tha n contro l mechanism , 17; self-defense la w for, 47-50, 187-200 ; as unrestricted unti l the 1860s , 44; women's fea r of, 6 ; women wh o defen d themselves against , 37-38 , 45-50, 187-200. See also sexual violenc e beauty. Se e feminine attractivenes s Bell, Becky, 180 Below the Belt: Unarmed Combat for Women

(Steiner), 55 Benton, Marjorie , 14 1 Berger, Ronal d J., 16 0 biologism, xii, 29, 233n. 3 . See also essentialism Birmingham school , 224-2 5 bisexuality, 148 black men : medi a image s of, 236n . 7; supposed attack s on white women , 28, 234n. 3 ; and violence, 234n . 3 black women, 23-25 ; as deviant, 23; embracing femininity a s in interest of , 227; as failed women , 24 ; as mammies or Jezebels, 24; as not allowed to refus e sex during slavery, 44; as psychologically prepared t o defend themselves , 127; punishment fo r killing men, 45—46 ; rapes by white men, 24; in self-defens e law, 46, 189, 194-95 Blind Ambition , 69 Bobbitt, Lorena , 45 bodies: as agents, 201; bodily habits preceding consciousness, 204; bodily memory in self-defense training , 103-12 ; body projects, 5-6, 96, 174; as boundaries not beings, 132 , 167; and consciousness, xiii-xiv, 8, 166, 201, 204, 210; as constructions, 163 ; feminism on , 162-65; gender ideology affecting interpretatio n of, 8 , 20; guns transforming, 164-65 ; inscribed in ways that perpetuate gende r

inequality, 137 , 210; as locus of resistance, 95; as malleable entities, 6; motor mem ory, 40; as objects rather than agents, 17; physicality and bodily discipline, 162-65; power and embodiment, 38-44 ; selfdefensers forming new bodily habits, 137; self-defense's significanc e for , 201; selfidentity based on, 172. See also embodiment; female body; mind-body dualis m body projects , 5-6 , 96, 174 Bourdieu, Pierre , 39 , 8 9 Bowker, Le e H., 154-55 , 237n. 4 boxing: bodily memor y in , 107-8 ; confi dence increase d by, 119; emotio n in, 109; fear overcom e in , 118 ; physicality of, 114 ; taking a punch, 93 , 106 ; women i n man's world of , 128 ; women intimidated by , 93 Boxing for Fitness, 87, 163, 16 4 Braidotti, Rosi , 204 Breedlove, Lynn, 184 ; Tribe 8 , 5, 14-15, 184 Bromley, Marion , 144-4 5 Brownmiller, Susan , 39-40 , 233n. 3 Buchwald, Emilie , 13 Burbank, Victori a Katherine , 2 3 8n. 5 Burg, Kathlee n Keefe , 55 Butler, Judith: o n bodies as politically regu lated boundaries, 132 , 167; o n compul sory heterosexuality, 90 ; discursive con struction o f sex criticized, xii i BWS (Battere d Women' s Syndrome) , 190-92, 197 , 19 9 Cabreros-Sud, Veena , 151-5 2 Caignon, Denise , x, 230 Callahan, A. Renee, 193 Campbell, Anne , 14 , 14 7 capitalism, 159 , 172, 179, 222 , 22 4 Caputi,Jane, 186-8 7 Cardio Combat , 1 , 2, 9, 86-87, l 6 3 casde doctrine, 192-9 3 Cayleff, Susan , 208- 9 Chicanas, 127 child-sexual-abuse survivors , 91 , 125, 12 6 Chimera, 69 , 126 chivalry, 206 choice, 174 Cline, Sally , 37 Cock, Jacklyn, 15 Cohen, Ed , 205

Index | college rap e prevention educatio n program s (RPEPs), 181,21 1 combat: as pleasurable, 155-56 , 208; women in , 21, 152, 155-56 concealed weapons , 70, 71, 143 confidence, 118-1 9 Conroy, Mary , 53-54 , 55 , 188-89 consciousness: and corporeality, xiii-xiv , 8, 166, 201, 204, 210; fals e consciousness , 222, 224, 226; and subversive effect s o f self-defense, 208 . See also mind-body dualism consciousness raising , 107 , 201, 21 0 consensual sex, 11, 31-33, 200 control: battering as issue of, 17 ; violence used for, 10 . See also power corporeal feminism, xi-xii , 217 critical distance , 213 cultural feminism : o n femininity, 145 ; in feminism's revolutionar y strategy , 158; heterosexist assumption s in, 146 ; legacy of, 144-48 ; radical feminism distin guished from, 237n . 3 ; on sexual practices, 148 ; white wome n a s model for, 146; and women's passivity , 148 ; and women's resistance , 180

25 9

Double Impact (film), 186 Douglas, Ann, 22 2 Dragonfire, Wendy , 8 0 dreams, 123 Dreamworlds (video), 182-83 , 186 dress: dress-reform movement , 209 ; an d femininity, 34 ; high heels , 34, 115, 122 ; and rape , 31 ; self-defensers changin g their styl e of, 120-22 ; short skirts , 31 dualism: See mind-body dualis m Dworkin, Andrea : biologjsm accusations , xii, 233n. 3 , 235n. 5 ; on masculinity, 30; on rape' s harm , 171 Echols, Alice, 209, 233n. 3 , 237n. 3 E. coli bacteria, 27 Ellis, Bret Easton, 2 3 8n. 4 Elshtain, Jean Bethke , 231-3 2 embodiment: conception s o f male and female, 167 ; an d power, 38-44 ; restruc turing throug h self-defense , 210 ; selfdefense subvertin g embodie d etho s of rape culture , xii, 132-33, 177—78 , 179 , 200, 210. See also bodies essentialism, 224 , 22 8 ethnicity, an d self-defense training , 127 Every Woman Can: The Conroy Method to Safety, Security, and Self-Defense (Conroy and Ritvo) , 53-54 , 55 , 188-89 Ewing, Charle s Patrick , 192 eye contact , 12 0

Daly, Mary , 21 , 237n. 3 date rape: incidence of , 85 ; men's perspec tive of, 31-32 ; as not reported, 234n . 5; resistance see n as precipitating, 194 ; selfdefense trainin g on, 95; and woman's ability to defend herself , 153 Fairbairn, William , 50-51 dating, self-defens e manual s on, 53, 5 4 false consciousness , 222 , 224, 22 6 Faludi, Susan , 4 deadly force . See lethal (deadly ) forc e de Beauvoir, Simone , 156-57 , 165 Fear into Anger: A Manual of Self Defense for Women (Bateman), 57 de Certeau , Michel , 228 Fein, Judith, 56-5 7 Defending Ourselves , 67-69 , 103 , 12 6 Felson, Richar d B. , 153 DeMasco, Steve , 87 Demystifying Violence: What Women and Girls female aggression : aggressive female bod y as ideologically produced, 201-2 ; aggressive Need to Know to Be Safe (Grieco), x posture feeling empowering , 2 ; as begetDevane, Anne, 186 ting further violence , 152-54 ; cultura l deviance, 22-2 5 fascination with , 5 ; in daily life, 103-4 , DiMassa, Diane, 187 123-24; danger of, 154-57 ; a n d feminin Diprose, Rosalyn , 137 , 166-67, 203 ity, 3 , 7, 18, 19, 21, 27-28, 57-58 ; femiDirty Weekend (Zahavi), 23 8n. 4 nist ambivalence regarding , xv, 12-18, discipline, bodily, 162-6 5 139; images of violent women, 184-85 ; Doest, Maria , 82-85 ; Karate Women, 82-8 6 lesbian body compare d wit h aggressiv e domestic violence . See battering female body , 201 ; lesbians seen as aggresdominator mode l o f society, 144

260 I

Index

sive, 23; male violence deterred by, 177 ; male violence perpetuated b y denying, 200; rape culture based on impossibility of, 11 ; repression of, connecte d t o ideologies, 179 ; self-defensers practicing , not just thinkin g about, 113 ; self-defens e training encouraging, 96-103 ; taking responsibility for, 196 , 205-7; tough women i n advertisements, 159 ; in wartime self-defens e manuals , 51 ; weapons' use, 3-4; in Western culture , xi. See also mean wome n female body : constraint s o n imagined possi bilities for, xv; as craft object , 163-64 ; seen as complementary t o male body , 25; self-defense challengin g traditiona l views of, xv; self-defense manual s on, 56; self-defense transformin g th e way it feels to inhabit, 2-3 , 89; as space to be invaded, 29-30 , 150 , 168; stylizing of, 33, 34-36 ; as takeable, 36 , 37, 91, 210 ; transformation throug h self-defense , 162-65; as vessels for babies and penises, 173; as victim-bodies, 10 , 11 Female Rage (Valentis and Devane), 186 feminine attractiveness : athleticism conflict ing with, 42-43 ; an d rape culture , 34-3 6 femininity (womanhood) , 20-22 ; and aggression, 3 , 7, 18, 19, 21 , 27-28, 57-58; codes of, circulatin g throughou t public discourse , 49-50; cultural femi nism on, 145; deference t o men in, 9, 34; displaced in self-defense training , 116; failing at, 25; as forced upo n women , 131; and heterosexuality, 23 , 46; as ideological category, 228; MacKinnon on , 37 , 89; as not coming naturally, 33 ; passivity of, 21 , 22, 148; and rape culture, 33-38, 58, 89, 163; redefining unfeminin e activi ties as, 138; as response to rape culture, 43, 44; ritual enactments of, 166 ; in selfdefense claims , 188 ; sexual availability to men a s element of, 26 ; unlearning, 90-95; virtues of, 21 ; as white and heterosexual, 46; women's subordinat e position signaled by, 34, 3 5 feminism: o n all men as capable o f rape, 179-80; backlash against , 4; on the body, 162-65 ; conflicting ideal s in selfdefense cases , 196 ; co-optatio n feare d

by, 158-62 ; corporeal feminism , xi-xii , 217; and female aggression , xv, 12-18, 139; first-wave feminism , 148 ; and gun control, 141-44 ; and guns, 135-36 , 150-51, 226 ; o n harm o f rape, 170-74 ; ideological enemie s as interpreted by, 231-32; innocence feminism , 152 ; learning from self-defense , 137-76 ; on marital rape, 32; on nonbodily form s of oppression a s violent, 155 ; on pleasure in politically incorrec t desires , 228-29; on popula r culture , 137 , 156, 159 , 221-30; and pornography, 149 , 225 ; postfeminism, 4 ; as power-averse, 147-48, 158 ; power feminism , 4 , 15, 161-62; pro-gun feminists , 143 ; pro-sex feminism, 148-49 ; on psychoanalysis, 228-29; purity o f antiviolence feminists , 150-51; revolutionar y overtone s of , 158; right-wing feminism , 15 ; Roiphe's criti cism of, xii ; and self-defense, x-xv , 134-36, 201 ; self-defense a s applied feminism, 217 ; self-defense la w reform , 187-200; self-defense movemen t as impetus for, 18 ; socialist feminism, 158; ugly feminist stereotype , 35 ; violence rejected by , 2, 14, 150-51, 155-57 , l 8 o ; what feminis m ha s made women into , 4-5; o n women i n sports, 155 , 156 , 1 58-59; women' s reactio n to , 217. See also cultural feminism ; feminis t theory ; physical feminism; radica l feminis m feminist theory : bourgeois liberal individualism in, 17; dismissed as too abstract, 2; equality and difference conflic t in, 198—200, 207—8; mind-body dualis m in, xi-xii, 165-70 ; "the personal is the political," 170 , 209-10; on rape as learned behavior, 28 ; self-defensers and , x, 175; sexual difference emphasize d by, 14; o n sexuality as natural and apolitical, 17 ; on social production o f sexual difference , 26; "woman" a s reified categor y for, 228 fertilization, 2 7 Fetter, Ann, 56, 57 fighting. See self-defense films, 98-100, 127 , 185-86 firearms. See guns firearms courses, 69-78; bodily memor y in, 105, 108-9

Index | first-wave feminism , 14 8 fitness: aerobics, 87 , 163-64. See also selfdefense-oriented fitness Five Ts , The, 74-75, 85 Flax, Jane, 151 Fletcher, Pamel a R. , 13-14 Flitterman-Lewis, Sandy , 228 forced sex . See rape Foucault, Michel , 162 , 20 3 Frank, Andrea , 73 Frankfurt school , 224 freedom, 203- 4 Free to Fight (concer t tour) , 187 Free to Fight Back: A Self-Defense Handbook for Women (Scribner), 55 Freud, Sigmund , 23 Friedan, Betty , 141 Gaddis, John, 113 , 122, 124, 216-17 Garcia, Inez , 49, 236n. 10 Gardner, Caro l Brooks, 50 , 237n. 11 Gatens, Moira, 167 , 19 9 Gay, Blenda, 47 Gay, Roxanne , 47 gender difference . See sex differenc e gender ideology : bodie s experience d and interpreted through , 8 , 20; gender as constructed throug h corporea l acts , 131-32; gender a s cultural fiction, 26-28; gende r a s discursive construc tion, 20 ; as lived, 89-90 ; ritual enact ments of , 166 ; i n self-defense manuals , 50-57; self-defense subverting , ix , xv, 7-8, 18 , 132, 178, 188. See also patriarchy gender inequality: best means of resisting, 207-8; bodies inscribed in ways that per petuate, 137 , 210; gender-specific somata , 40; in patriarchal power system, 26-27; and rape, 11 ; as sensual, erotic, and attractive, 34; social production of , 26 gender-motivated assaults , 56 , 170, 234n. 4 gender transgression , self-defenser s as , 128-31 Gillespie, Cynthi a K. , 10 , 193 Goetz, Bernard , 197 Gramsci, Antonio, 224-2 5 Grant, Karla , 56 , 164 Grieco, Helen : Defendin g Ourselve s self defense course , 67-69 , 103 , 126; Demys-

26 1

tifying Violence, x ; on fighting unde r conditions o f terror, 104 ; on physicality, 113; on self-defense a s maintenance, 96; on self-defens e a s right o f citizenship, 98, 131 ; on women's abilit y to fight, 91, 101

Griffiths, Thelma , 19 3 Grosz, Elizabeth: o n bodily discipline , 163; on changin g the body, 137 ; o n corpo real feminism, xi—xii , 217; on equalit y and differenc e i n feminism, 207 , 208; o n mind-body dualism , 166 ; o n prostheti c synthesis, 164 ; o n women's positio n i n patriarchal powe r system , 26-2 7 Groves, Gail , x, 230 gun control , 141-44 , 145 , 21 1 guns (firearms) : accidents , 141—42 , 237n. 1; body transforme d by , 164-65; cooling off period before purchasing , 143 ; feminism and, 135-36 , 150-51 , 158 , 226; firearms courses, 69-78, 105 , 108-9; and martial arts, n o ; as masculine, 158 ; permit diffi culties, 142—43 ; self-defense manual s on, 57; shotguns, 70, 71; for stranger assault , 175; women endangere d b y use of, 2 3 5m 6; women i n man's world of , 129-31 ; women's fea r of , 70, 92, 94-95, 141 ; a s women's issue , 139-44 ; women traine d out o f competence with , 41. See also handguns; Women and Guns Gustuson, Donald , 53 habitus, 39 Hall, Stuart , 225 , 22 6 Hammer, Marion , 140-4 1 handguns: conceale d weapons , 70 , 71, 143 ; considering circumstance s whe n letha l force i s appropriate, 157 ; firearms training, 69-78 , 105 , 108-9; Ms. magazine issue on, 4, 15 , 135; Orlando, Fla., training program an d rape, 154; revolvers an d semi-automatics com pared, 77 ; women's ownershi p of , 1 Hands Off! Self-Defense for Women (Fairbairn), 50-51 Haraway, Donna , 230 Hart, Lynda , 48, 192, 239n. 5 hegemony, 224-25 , 226 Her Wits about Her: Self-Defense Success Stories (Caigno n an d Groves), x, 230

262 |

Index

heterosexism, 25 , 146 , 15 7 heterosexuality: and beliefs abou t body parts, 29, 180 ; as compulsory, 25 , 90; consensual sex, 11 , 31-33, 200; and femininity, 23 , 46; ideology of , 21 ; intercourse a s natural in self-defens e law, 49; intercourse a s ritual of manhood, 30 ; as privileged, 25 , 27; and sports, 42-43; suppression of women's aggression and, 179 ; womanhood tie d to, 23 high heels, 34 , 115 , 12 2 Hill, Pamela , 19 4 Hoagland, Sarah, 21 Holt, Beth, 8 0 homicide, spousal , 152-5 3 homosexual women. See lesbians hooks, bell, 22 7 Horkheimer, Max , 22 2 Hothead Paisan: Homicidal Lesbian Terrorist PiMassa), 18 7 house, safety precautions for the, 75, 10 9 How to Say No to a Rapist and Survive (Storaska), 54-5 5 Hughes, Francine , 3 7 identity, ideologies of , 16 6 imminence requirement , 49 , 19 2 Impact, 69 Impaired Mental Stat e defense, 19 1 In Defense of Ourselves: A Rape Prevention Handbook for Women (Sanfor d and Fetter), 56 , 57 individual change , versus social change, 13 , 208-11

individualism: possessive individualism, 172 , 174. See also liberal individualis m inequality, gender . See gender inequality Innes, Rosalind, 17 0 innocence feminism , 15 2 instruction in self-defense. See self-defense training intercourse, sexual . See heterosexuality Internet. See Web sites interviews, 215-1 8 Jackson, Shannon, 138 , 167 , 169-7 0 Jameson, Fredric , 226 Jhally, Sut , 182-8 3 Joan of Arc, 19 , 21

Jones, Ann, 15 , 16 5 Jones, Sonny, 142-43 , 17 5 Jordan, Susan B., 4 9 karate, 80-86 ; physicality of, 113-14 ; variety of response techniques in, n o Karate Women, 82-8 6 Kellerman, Arthur L., 14 2 Kelman, Mark, 197-98 , 239n . 6 King, Neal, 183 , 238n. 3 Kleck, Gary , 142 , 15 4 Krav Maga, 78-8 0 Kurzman, Charles, 231 Lacanian theory, 22 5 Lakeland, Mary Jo, 15 7 law of self-defense. See self-defense la w Lee, Athena, 9 6 Lehrman, Karen, 14 0 Lentz, Kirsten Marthe, 149 , 164-65 , 17 0 lesbians: as aggressive, 23; aggressive femal e body compare d with lesbian body, 201; and cultural feminism, 146 ; as deviant, 23; as model o f equality and cooperation, 148 ; self-defensers labele d as, 130; social order threatened by, 23 lethal (deadly ) force: considering circumstances when appropriate , 157 ; elements in validity of, 76-77 ; and firearms,72; in self-defense agains t rape, 46; in selfdefense law, 46, 47-48, 76-77; in sodomy cases , 45 Lethal Force Institute , 10 8 Levin, Milt, 15 2 liberal individualism: the body in, 165-66 ; in feminist theory , 17 ; self-defens e undermining, 169 ; women exclude d by, 167-69 Liddle, Mark, 15 5 Limbaugh, Rush, 4 Lisa Sliwa's Common Sense Defense (video) , 96 little assaults, 11 7 Locke, John, 16 5 Lombroso, Cesare , 2 2 Lorber, Judith, 13 8 Lorde, Audre, 15 8 MacKinnon, Catharin e A.: biologism accusations, xii, 2 3 3n. 3 ; on femininity, 37 ,

Index | 26 3 89; on myth o f male power, 29 ; on rape's harm , 172-73 ; on sexuality as social process, 2 3 5n. 5 ; on women's sex uality, 168 Madonna, 227 male gaze, 35 male violence: in black and white men, 23 4n. 3 ; images of, a s routine, 183-84 ; as inevitable, ix, 3, 196; legal deterrenc e and pleas for stopping, 16 ; men as victims of, 7 ; size as irrelevant to , 189; women's resistanc e deterring , 177 . Se e also sexual violenc e manhood. See masculinity manuals o f self-defense, 50-57 , 218 Marcus, Sharon , 10 , 179 Marcuse, Herbert , 222 marital rape , 32 martial art s courses, 78-86; and guns, n o ; Krav Maga, 78-80 ; staying in the body, 109; and weapons, i n . See also boxing; karate martial art s films, 127 Martin, Emily , 27 Martinez, Hilaria , 46 Marxism, 222-24 , 2 2 7 Masaki, Linda, 53 masculinity (manhood) : and aggression, 19, 27-28, 178 , 196; failing at, 25; guns as masculine, 158 ; the penis and, 30; an d rape culture , 28—33 ; redefining, t o transform rap e culture , 13 ; ritual enactment s of, 166 ; and sports, 156 ; strength and invulnerability associate d with, 33; toughness associate d with , 121 ; and violence, 139 , 234n. 3 McCaughey, Martha , 183 , 238n. 3 McCormick, Deborah , 85-8 6 McGrath, Alice , 53 mean women : i n films, 184, 202; images of , pushing the bounds o f gendered bodies , 202; self-defensers' reactio n to , 217; selfdefense trainin g creating, 9, 115 media: black men in, 236n. 7; films, 98-100, 127, 185-86 ; MTV, 35-36, 182-83; pornography, 149 , 225, 236n. 6; romance novels, 222, 223, 226, 229-30 ; toug h women i n advertisements, 159 ; women's images in, 5, 35-36, 94, 98-100, 185-86 . See also women's magazine s

men: aggressio n a s seen by, 14; all men as capable o f rape, 179-80 ; cultural femi nism on , 144 ; as inherendy pron e t o rape, xii; as less threatening to selfdefensers, 119 ; male gaze , 35 ; male violence against , 7 ; as naturally predatory , 28; in partnership wit h women , 144; physical movement compare d wit h women, 40-41 ; a s protectors and defenders o f women, 7 , 200, 206; rape and self-defens e la w accepting aggres sion by, 44-50; rape as experienced by, 2 8 , 31-33 , 28 , 31-33; as rape victims, 30, 45, 47; reaction t o self-defensers , 128, 214; and sexual difference, 19-58 ; sexuality as construct of , 172 ; sexuality of, 148 ; in sports, 41-43; an d spousal homicide, 152-53 ; testing women, 75; violence against , compare d wit h women, 37-38 , 236n. 8 ; violence use d for contro l by, 10; women a s better shooters than , 70 , 73; women a s more considerate than , 85 ; and women a s natural pair, 157 ; women a s property of , 44, 168 , 171-72; women's deferenc e to , 9, 34 ; women's powe r over , 34; women's reveng e feare d by , 179. Se e also black men ; mal e violence; masculin ity; penis, the; white men methodology o f this study, 212-32 ; critica l distance, 213 ; interviews, 215-18 ; par ticipant observation , 212—15 ; published materials, 218-2 0 Meyer, Alice , 73 Mill, John Stuart , 165 mind-body dualism , 165-70 ; and corporeal feminism, xi-xii ; rape' s harm conceive d in dualisti c terms , 171 ; self-defense and , 167, 173 mini-batons, 76 mock combat , pleasur e of , xiii-xi v Model Mugging , 60-67 ; bodily memor y in, 103, 105 , 112; graduation , 66, 116 ; martial arts compared with , 84 ; multiple assailants course, 67; number o f wome n trained, 1 ; physicality in, 113 , 114 ; Quigley on , 76, 111; students cheerin g each othe r on , 103; weapons course , 67 Model Mugging News, 66, 125 motor memory , 40

264 I

Index

movies, 98-100 , 127 , 185-8 6 Ms. magazin e handgu n issue , 4, 15 , 135 MTV, 35-36 , 182-8 3 Mulvey, Laura , 35-36 , 17 0 murder, spousal , 152-5 3 National Coalitio n Agains t Sexua l Assaul t (NCASA) We b site , 233m 2 National Crim e Victimizatio n Surve y (NCVS), 234 m 6 National Domesti c Violenc e Hotline , 18 2 National Rifl e Associatio n (NRA) , 139-41 ; American Rifleman, 91 , 102 , 175 ; "NRA Woman's Voice " column , 91 ; reasons for supportin g women's self-defense , 175 Native America n women , 12 7 Nelson, Mar y Ellen, 19 4 New England Journal of Medicine, 14 2 Nike corporation , 15 8 nonlethal weapons , 7 6 nonviolence, 144-45 , 1 56-57, 16 1 No Retrea t Rule , 48 , 192-9 3 Not an Easy Target (Quigley), 73 NRA. See National Rifl e Associatio n "NRA Woman' s Voice " (column) , 91 O'Brien, Patrici a H. , ix , 9, 11 , 127, 230 oral copulation , defens e move s against , 64, 75 Orlando, Fla. , handgun trainin g program , 154 padded attacke r courses , 59-69 ; Blind Ambition, 69 ; Chimera, 69 , 126 ; custom assaul t scenarios in, 64 ; Defendin g Ourselves, 67-69 , 103 , 126 ; emotiona l processing in , 61 ; full-force fighting in , 61; graduation , 115 ; Impact, 69 ; multiple assailant s courses , 67; SafeSkills, 69 ; supportive atmospher e in , 63 ; and weapons, 111 ; weapons courses , 67; will to fight a s goal of, 62 . See also Model Mugging Paglia, Camille , 31 , 161 paramilitary culture , 176 , 23 8n. 6 participant observation , 212-1 5 partnership mode l o f society, 14 4 patriarchy: th e body a s locus of resistance to, 95 ; gender inequalit y in , 26-27 ;

women playin g into, 223 , 224. See also gender ideolog y penis, the : Bobbitt case , 45; defense move s against ora l copulation, 64 , 75; as marker o f sexuality, 26 ; and sens e of self in men , 30 ; woman's bod y see n a s vessel for, 17 3 Penley, Constance , 228 , 229 pepper spray , 7 6 Phair, Patrick , 67 , 68, 69 physical feminism, 177-211 ; an d Grosz' s corporeal feminism , xi-xii , 217 ; the physical and the feminism in, xvi, 200-205; policy implication s of , 211 ; and rap e culture , 177-80 ; in refor m o f self-defense law , 187-200 ; sexist ideolo gies illuminated by , xii; in sexual assaul t awareness an d prevention, 180-8 7 physicality: an d bodily discipline , 162-65 ; of self-defense training , 103 , 112-16 . See also bodies; physical feminis m physically challenge d women , 69 , 84-8 5 Plaza, Monique, 17 2 pleasure: feminist analyse s o f women' s popular pleasures , 221-30 ; i n fighting back, 119 ; in moc k combat , xiii-xiv , 155-56, 208 ; in politicall y incorrec t desires, 228-29 ; i n self-defens e training , 112-16

politically incorrec t desires , pleasure in , 228-29 popular culture : and capitalis t co-optation , 137, 159 ; feminist analyse s of women's, 221-30 pornography, 149 , 225, 236n. 6 possessive individualism, 172 , 17 4 postfeminism, 4 power: batterin g a s issue of, 17 ; as decentralized, 161 ; embodiment and , 38-44 ; fantasy of , i n rape, 29; feminism a s power-averse, 147-48 , 158 ; hegemony, 224-25, 226 ; patriarchal syste m of , 26-27; reificatio n o f male, 200; and sex uality, 33 , 172-73; women a s uncomfortable with , 93 , 94; of women ove r men, 34 . See also control power feminism , 4 , 15 , 161-6 2 progress, 16 1 prostitution: a s deviant, 22 , 23; prostitutes as not allowe d t o refus e sex , 44

Index | 26 5 provocation, defens e of , 48 psychoanalysis, 23, 227-29, 2 3 5n. 3 psychological self-defense , 19 2 Quayle, Dan, 168 Quigley, Paxton , 73-78 ; on assertive pos ture in daily life, 103 ; on feminist s against guns , 136 ; firearms cours e of , 73-78; graduatio n fro m firearms cours e of, 115 ; Lentz's criticis m of, 164 ; o n Model Mugging , 76 , 111; police and firearms training, 72 ; on responsible gun use, 141 ; on shooting unde r pressure , 108; students encourage d by , 103 ; on tactics beating marksmanship, 109 ; o n Thelma and Louise, 100 ; on variety of defense strategies , 112 , 175; on women' s fear o f guns, 92; on women's gu n training like enterin g a male-dominated occupation, 165 , 20 8 race: and self-defense training , 127 . See also women o f color racism, 25, 151, 160, 175, 151, 234n. 3 Radford, Lorraine , 48, 191 radical feminism: biologis m in , xii, 23 3n. 3; cultural feminis m distinguishe d from, 237n. 3 ; on sexuality, 148 ; o n sexuality as inseparable from powe r relations , 3 3 Radway, Janice A., 221, 223, 226 , 229-30 rape: AIDS makin g life-threatening, 6 ; all men a s capable of , 179-80 ; all sex as, 33; and assailant's identity, 234n . 5 ; of black wome n b y white men , 24 ; Brownmiller on , 23 3n. 3 ; of Central Park jogger, 4 , 23 3n. 1 ; as control mechanism, 10 ; and dress, 31 ; excuses and justifications for , 31-32 ; failure o f attempts, 11 ; fantasy o f size and strength in, 29 , 200; gender inequalit y in , 11; harm of , 170-74 ; incidence of , 6 ; as inevitable, 16 , 105-6; in law, 44-50; as learned behavior , 28 ; marital rape , 32; of men, 30 , 45, 47; men as inherently prone to , xii; men's experienc e of , 28, 31-33; myth s of , 171 , 175; as natural male predation , xi , 28; occurring in woman's ow n bedroom, 75 ; oral copu lation, 64 , 75; Orlando, Fla. , handgun program an d incidence of , 154 ; a s

process not inevitability, 105-6 ; rapeability, 37 ; self-defense changin g meaning of , 11-12 , 170-72 ; and selfdefense law , 45-50; sense o f self-effi cacy affecte d by , 9; and social produc tion o f sexual difference , 26 ; as ultimate terrible crime , 149 ; as violent no t sexual, 17 , 31-33, 85 , 160; women as inherently violable , xii; women as inviting, 28 , 31; women's fea r of , 1 , 6, 43, 61 , 169. See also acquaintance rape ; date rape ; rape culture ; rap e preventio n rape crisi s centers: interpreting rap e and funding of , 32 ; self-defense trainin g in, 17, 21 1

rape culture : core challeng e to , 18; defined, 234n. 4; and female aggression , 11 ; femininity and , 33-38, 58 , 89, 163; freedom of women diminishe d in , 203; as idealized norm , 25 ; masculinity and , 28-33; means o f transforming, 13 ; perceptions of women a s part of, 94 ; physical femi nism's consequence s for , 177-80 ; rap e law solidifying , 44 ; self-defense subvert ing embodied etho s of, xii , 132-33, 177-78, 179 , 200, 210; women's help lessness as central tene t of , 7 ; women's mobility limite d by, 43-44 rape law, 44-50 rape myths, 171 , 17 5 rape prevention: colleg e educatio n pro grams, 181 , 211; physical feminism in , 180-87; risk-reducin g strategies , 3 ; selfdefense manuals , 50-57 ; on women' s violence, 177 ; women's vulnerabilit y emphasized in , 16 rape prevention educatio n program s (RPEPs), 181,21 1 Rational Woman's Guide to Self-Defense, The (Conroy), 53 Reading the Romance: Women, Patriarchy, and Popular Literature (Radway) , 221, 22 3 Reay, Donal d T. , 142 responsibility: for female aggression , 196, 205-7; f ° r gun use, 141-42; placed on perpetrators o f violence, xiv reverse sexism , 184 , 18 5 revolvers, 77 Right-to-Life movement , 231-3 2 right-wing feminism , 1 5

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Index

right-wing women , heterosexis t ideolog y in, 146-47 , 17 6 riot grrr l bands, 5 , 18 7 risk-taking behaviors , 18 1 Ritvo, Edward , 53-54 , 55 , 188-8 9 Roiphe, Katie : Take Bac k th e Nigh t criti cized by, xii; Wolf contrasted with , 161; on wome n a s whining victims, 4 Rollins, Judith, 21 2 romance novels , 222, 223, 226, 229-3 0 Rose, Jacqueline, 227-2 8 Rosie th e Riveter, 5 0 Roth, Jeffrey A. , 235n . 6 Roth, Martha , 1 3 RPEPs (rap e prevention educatio n pro grams), 181 , 211 sadomasochistic sex , 14 8 SafeSkills, 6 9 Safety Tips for Women (Californi a Stat e Police), 51-52 , 218 Sanford, Lind a Tschirhart, 56 , 57 Scheppele, Ki m Lane , 43-44, 5 3 Schneider, Elizabet h M. , 49 , 19 1 Schwartz, Michael, 8 6 screaming, 52 , 56 Scribner, Marilyn , 5 5 Searles, Patricia, 16 0 self-defense: an d aerobics , 164 ; as applied feminism, 217 ; bodily disciplin e in , 162-65; bodily significanc e of , 201; changing what i t means to be a woman, 2-3, 18 ; controversial question s raise d by, 205-11 ; co-optatio n a s concern for , 158-62; as counterdiscourse, 89-136 ; danger of, 154—57 ; a nd feminism , x—xv, 134-36, 201 ; feminism learnin g from, 137-76; Five T s of, 74-75 , 85 ; freedom for wome n comin g from, 203-4 ; gende r ideology disrupte d by , ix, xv, 7-8 , 18 , 132, 178 , 188; implications of , ix , 156-57; as increasing violence, 152-54 , 206; liberal individualism undermine d by, 169 ; lore of , 95-103 ; making a house safe, 75 , 109 ; manuals of , 50-57 , 218; methods o f this study, 212-32 ; and mind-body dualism , 167 , 173 ; political importance of , 132 ; published material s on, 218-20 ; rape culture' s embodie d ethos subverted by , xii, 132-33 , 177-78 ,

179, 200, 210; rape politicized by , 173-74; rape's meaning changed by , 11-12; a s right of citizenship, 97-98, 131, 169 ; sex difference undermine d by , 210; and the se x wars, 149-52 ; as social activity, 174 ; variety o f meanings gener ated by, 202 ; weaker se x notion sub verted by , 154 . See also self-defense law ; self-defense movement ; self-defensers ; self-defense trainin g Self-Defense and Empowerment News, 66, 12 5 Self-Defense for Girls: A Secondary School and College Manual (Tegner an d McGrath) , 53 Self-Defense for Women (Gustuso n and Masaki), 53 Self-Defense for Women: Combato (Under wood), 50-51 , 21 8 self-defense law , 45-50; Battered Women' s Syndrome, 190-92 ; casde doctrine , 192-93; construe d wit h me n i n mind , 48, 198 ; deadly force in , 46, 47-48, 76-77; femininity i n claim s for self defense, 188 ; feminist reformatio n of , 187-200; imminence requirement , 49 , 192; Impaired Menta l Stat e defense , 191; and methodolog y o f this study , 220-21; N o Retrea t Rule , 48 , 192-93; as political, 197-98 ; provocation defense, 48 ; psychological self-defense , 192; temporary insanit y plea, 47; women i n no-win situatio n in , 19 0 self-defense manuals , 50-57 , 218 self-defense movement , 3-8 ; article s of, 2 ; challenge of , 8-12 ; a s impetus fo r femi nism, 18 ; as movement fo r socia l change, xi, 8 , 13 , 210-11; newsletter s and magazines of , 219 ; this study as shaping, 23 0 self-defense-oriented fitness, 86-87 ; Aer obox, 87 ; Boxing for Fitness , 87 , 163, 164; Cardio Combat , 1 , 2, 9, 86-87 , 16 3 self-defensers: considerin g circumstance s when letha l force i s appropriate, 157 ; defined, xi ; and feminist theory , x , 175 ; as gender transgressions , 128-31 ; identi ties of, 9 ; jokes about , 128 ; labeled as lesbians, 130 ; as man haters , 127 ; men as less threatening to , 119 ; men's reaction s to, 128 , 214; new bodil y habit s forme d

Index | 26 7 by, 137 ; new versions o f womanhoo d for, 8 ; practicing assertivenes s no t just thinking abou t it, 113; therapeutic dis course used by, 97 self-defense training , 59-88 ; as activist and collective, 13 ; bodily memor y in, 103-12; categories o f classes, 59; co-ed courses, 79-80; under condition s o f terror, 104 ; emotional and physical impac t as inseparable, 116 ; female aggressio n encouraged in, 96-103; femininity dis placed in, 116; heightened awarenes s fol lowing classes, 216; as increasingly appealing project, 4 ; mean wome n cre ated by, 9; as metamorphic, 116-27 ; physicality of , 103 ; for physically chal lenged women, 69 , 84-85; race and ethnicity and, 127; in rape crisis and battered women's centers , 17 ; socia l services contrasted with , 134-35 ; stories of triumph an d survival in, 101-2 ; survivors of rape and abuse helped by, 125-26; taking a punch, 93 , 106; transformin g the way it feels to inhabit a female body , 2_ 3» 89 ; variety of regimens, 110-12 , 176; verbal techniques, 10 , 63, 65 , 75-76, 85-86 , 104-5 , 117-18 ; white women seein g as subversive, 151; women wishin g it weren't necessary , 133-34. See also firearmscourses; martial arts courses; padded attacke r courses ; self-defense-oriented fitness self-determination, 168 , 17 4 self-efficacy: rap e affecting sens e of, 9 ; selfdefense affectin g sens e of, 9-10 self-proprietorship (self-possession) : chang ing meaning when wome n claim , 163; and feminism, 166 ; an d the harm of rape, 171 semi-automatic pistols , 77 sex difference (gender difference), 19-58 ; aggression as marker of, 2-3; embodiment and power, 38-44 ; equality and difference, 198-200 , 207—8; feminists emphasizing, 14 ; naturalness denied, 26, 132; self-defense undermining , 210 ; social production of , 25-28; theories of, 203 sexism: heterosexism, 25 , 146, 157; reverse sexism, 184 , 18 5 sexology, 23 , 23 5n. 3

sexual-abuse survivors , 91, 125, 12 6 sexual assault. See sexual violenc e sexuality: bisexuality, 148 ; as construct of male domination , 172 ; fantasized con nection betwee n violenc e and , 185 ; gender and sex, 26-28; genitalia as markers of , 26 ; MacKinnon on , 168, 23 5n. 5 ; men and women a s complementary, 25 ; men's as dangerous, 148 ; as natural an d apolitical, 17 ; and power, 33, 172-73 ; pro-sex feminists , 148-49 ; women's experienc e of , 148-49 . See also heterosexuality; lesbian s sexual revolution, 13 7 sexual violence: body reduce d t o appendag e of another in , 201; as control mecha nism, 10 ; in fantasy, 185 , 187, 238n . 4; gender-motivated assaults , 56 , 170 , 234n. 4; and individualism's exclusio n of women, 168 ; little assaults, 117 ; me n manipulating women int o vulnerabl e position, 107 ; offer s o f apparently inno cent help , 65; physical feminism i n awareness and prevention of , 180-87 ; strangers as perpetrators of , 52 , 53-55, 95—96, 175 ; weapons in defense against , 11, 234n . 6; women's behavio r restricted t o avoid, 53 , 181; women's experience of , 6-7 ; women's mobilit y limited by , 43; women's sens e of self affected by , 9. See also battering; rap e sex wars, 148-5 2 Sheehan, Stacy , 187 Shilling, Chris , 6 shotguns, 70 , 7 1 Shuri-ryu, 81 Shuri-Spiral News, The, 13 5

Simmons, Adelle , 141 Simonds, Wendy, 221 , 223, 225, 22 9 Sliwa, Lisa , 56 , 57, 96, 134, 209, 21 8 Smith, Barbara , 39 social change : individual chang e and , 13, 208-11; self-defens e movemen t as movement for , xi, 8, 13 , 210-11 socialist feminism , 15 8 social responsibility: fo r female aggression , 196, 205-7; for gun use, 141-42; place d on perpetrator s o f violence, xiv social services, self-defense trainin g con trasted with , 134-3 5

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Index

sodomy laws , 45 Spender, Dale , 37 Spock, Benjamin , 1 9 sports: feminine attractivenes s and, 42-43; feminist concern s ove r women in , 155, 156, 158-59 ; and heterosexuality, 42-43; increasin g participation of women, 42 ; and masculinity, 43 , 156 ; sex tests, 236n. 9; those in which women ar e encouraged t o participate, 42; women an d men compared, 41-43 ; women's statu s dilemma in, 138 . See also boxing spousal battering. See battering spousal homicide, 152-5 3 Steinem, Gloria , 158 Steiner, Bradley J., 55 Stiehm, Judith Hicks , 157 Stoltenberg, John, 13 Stopping Rape: Successful Survival Strategies

(Bart and O'Brien), ix , 23 0 S # T>OP program , 182 Storaska, Frederick , 54-5 5 strangers: guns for use against assaul t by, 175; as perpetrators o f sexual violence, 52, 53-55 , 95-96; resistance to , seen as precipitating assaul t by, 194 stun guns , 76 Swasey, Elizabeth J., 91 Take Back the Night: celebratin g wome n who fight back , 180 ; in claimin g women's rights , xi, 211; as emphasizing victimization, 1 ; Roiphe's criticis m of , xii Tegner, Bruce , 53 temporary insanit y plea, 47 Terminator 2 (film), 5 , 98 Thelma and Louise (film) , 5 , 22, 99-100, 185-86 therapeutic discourse , 97 Thomas, Matt , 60 Thomas, William I. , 22, 235n. 2 tiger claw , 86 Title I X of the Educational Equit y Act of 1972, 42, 156 training in self-defense. See self-defense training Transforming a Rape Culture (Buchwald ,

Fletcher, an d Roth), 13

Trias, Robert A. , 80 Tribe 8 (band), 5, 14-15, 184 true man rule, 48, 192-93 Truth, Sojourner , 14 6 Turaj, Johanna, 217 Underwood, William , 50-51 , 218 Valentis, Mary, 186 Valley Women's Martia l Arts , Inc., 80-82 VAWA (Violenc e Against Women Act), 181-82, 211 ; Web site, 23 8n. 2 Violence Agains t Women Grant s Office , 182; Web site, 23 8n. 2 violence: as begetting violence, 152-54 , 206; as control mechanism, 10 ; cultural con cern with, 4; fantasized connectio n between sexualit y and, 185 ; feminists rejecting, 2 , 14, 150-51, 155-57 , 180 ; and masculinity, 139 , 234n. 3; nonbodily oppression as violent, 155 ; responsibility placed with the perpetrator, xiv ; against women compare d with men, 37-38, 236n. 8; women define d a s not violent, 179; women's fear of, 90, 116. See also aggression; male violence; sexual violence Violence Against Women Ac t (VAWA), 181-82, 211 ; Web site, 23 8n. 2 Violence Agains t Women Office , 18 2 weapons: concealed weapons , 70 , 71, 143 ; in defens e agains t sexua l assault, 11, 234n. 6; nonlethal weapons , 76 ; in padded attacke r courses , 67; and physical self-defense, 111-12 ; self-defens e manuals on, 52, 57; women' s us e of, 3-4. See also guns Web sites : of Assault Prevention Informa tion Networ k (APIN) , 219; fund s spen t by the Violence Agains t Women Act (VAWA), 238n . 2; guidelines of National Coalitio n Agains t Sexua l Assault (NCASA ) fo r choosing a selfdefense program , 233n . 2 ; on selfdefense program s and other resources , 23 3 n. 1 ; of the Violence Agains t Women Grant s Office , 2 3 8n. 2 Weiss, Judith, 219 white men : black women rape d by, 24; an d violence, 234n . 3

Index | 26 9 white women : benefitin g fro m racis t bias in feminism, 151 ; black men supposedly attacking, 28 , 234n. 3 ; black wome n contrasted with , 23-25 ; as contradictory identity, 227 ; in cultural feminism , 146 ; heroic role s for, 159-60 ; police truste d by, 157 ; punishment fo r killing men, 45 ; self-defense claim s by, 189 ; self-defens e liberating from clas s of the protected , 157; self-defense trainin g feeling subver sive for, 151 ; women's sexua l agenc y and, 150-5 2 wife beating . See battering Wolf, Naomi : o n all men as capable of rape, 179 ; on changing attitude s abou t rape, 187 ; on feminine attractiveness , 34, 35 ; On feminism's negativ e imagery , 180; power feminis m of , 161-62 ; on women wh o reject feminism , 15 8 Wolf, Susa n Ellis, 157 womanhood. See femininity Womanly Art of Self-Defense, The (Burg) , 5 5

women: agenc y of, xii-xiii , 15-16 , 119-20 , 138, 190 , 196, 201; aggression a s seen by, 14 ; as better shot s then men , 70, 73 ; and combat , 21 , 152, 155-56; danger as perceived by , 188 ; defined a s not violent, 179 ; as de-skilled, 36-37 , 49; deviance in , 22-25; effort require d t o be, 33 ; fear o f battering, 6 ; fear o f guns, 70, 92, 94-95, 141 ; fear o f rape, 1 , 6, 43 , 61, 169 ; fear o f violence, 90, 116; o n feminism, 217 ; freedom for , 203—4; a nd guns, 41, 139-44; handgun ownership , 1; inability t o fight, 90-95; as inherently violable, xii; innocence of , 151-52 ; liberal individualism excluding , 167-69 ; media image s of, 5 , 35-36, 94, 98-100, 185-86; and men as natural pair, 157; men a s protecting an d defending, 7 , 200, 206; men fearing reveng e of , 179; men testing , 75; as morally superio r to men, 20-21 , 145-46 , 161 ; as more con siderate tha n men , 85; in partnership with men , 144; physica l movemen t compared wit h men , 40—41; power as uncomfortable for , 93, 94; power ove r men, 34 ; as property o f men, 44 , 168 , 171-72; prostitution, 22 , 23, 44 ; rapeability, 37 ; as responsible fo r main -

taining moral order , 157 , 206; restricting behaviors t o avoid assault , 53 , 181 ; right-wing women , 146—47 , 176; selfdefense changin g what i t means to be a woman, 2-3 , 18; self-defense fo r physically challenged , 69 , 84-85; selfdefensers havin g new conceptions of , 8; sexual agency of , 15-16 , 148 , 150; an d sexual difference, 19-58 ; sexuality as experienced by , 148-49 ; sexual violenc e experienced by , 6-7; in sports, 41-43 , 155, 156 , 158-59; and spousal homicide , 152-53; throwin g lik e a girl, xiii, 40, 92 ; tough wome n i n advertisements, 159 ; a s victims, xii-xiii, 10 , 11, 16, 148 , 160-61, 180 , 181, 187, 194, 196; violence agains t compare d wit h men, 37-38, 236 m 8 ; as visual image for male spectatorship, 35-36 ; as weaker sex , 154 ; "woman" a s reified categor y i n femi nism, 228 . See also female aggression ; female body ; femininity ; feminism ; white women ; wome n o f color Women and Guns (magazine): firearms instructor on , 71; and gun control, 140; on gun s for taking back th e night, 111; right-wing discours e in , 175 ; success stories in, 102 , 175; women a s represented in , 149 , 16 4 women o f color: Asian American women , 127, 195 ; Chicanas, 127 ; and cultural feminism, 146 ; an d images of white female heroism , 159-60 ; Native Ameri can women , 127 ; self-defense a s liberating for, 157 ; and self-defense law , 195 ; and women' s sexua l agency , 150-52 . See also black wome n women's aggression . See female aggressio n women's magazines : directives for women' s behavior in , 34; Ms. magazine handgu n issue, 4, 15 , 135; N RA advertising cam paign in, 141 Wuornos, Aileen , 195 , 239n. 5 yelling, 56 , 62, 85-86, 104-5 Young, Iri s Marion: o n bodily dispositions , xiii, 40-41 , 92 ; on women keepin g closed in , 120 Zahavi, Helen , 2 3 8n. 4

About th e Author

Martha McCaughe y i s Assistant Professo r o f Women's Studie s in the Center for Interdisciplinary Studies at Virginia Tech. A third-wave feminis t active in anti-sexual assault education since 1989, she developed, with colleague Neal King, a n alternative metho d fo r suc h educatio n usin g images of women verbally an d physicall y overpowerin g men . McCaughey' s scholarl y wor k examines the embodied discourses of gender, sexuality, and aggression. Focusing on scientific narratives , popular culture, and feminist theory , her work has been published in Hypatia, Science as Culture, GLQ, masculinities, Teaching Sociology, an d in No Angels: Women Who Commit Violence, edite d by Alice Myer s and Sarah Wight (Pandor a 1996) . She is currendy coeditin g a book o n violent women in film and teaches courses in women's studies, science and technology studies, and sociology. She received he r Ph.D. in sociology from th e Univer sity of California a t Santa Barbara. McCaughey serves on the editorial board of Gender & Society and is a member o f several academic association s in her areas of study. She does not represent any self-defense o r self-defense-related organi zation.

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