New and Improved: The Transformation of American Women's Emotional Culture 9780814739815

Citation preview

New and Improved

The History of Emotions Series EDITED B Y PETER N . STEARNS , CARNEGIE-MELLO N UNIVERSIT Y JAN LEWIS , RUTGER S UNIVERSITY , NEWAR K

i. On the Sources of Patriarchal Rage: The Commonplace Books of William Byrd and Thomas Jefferson and the Gendering of Tower in the Eighteenth Century KENNETH A . LOCKRIDG E

2. The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 LINDA W . ROSENZWEI G

3. American Cool: Constructing a Twentieth-Century Emotional Style PETER N . STEARN S

4. An Emotional History of the United States EDITED B Y PETE R N . STEARN S AND JA N LEWI S

5. New and Improved: The Transformation of American Women's Emotional Culture J O H N C . SPURLOC K AN D CYNTHIA A . MAGISTR O

New and Improved The Transformation of American Women's Emotional Culture

John C. Spurlock and

Cynthia A. Magistro

n

NEW YOR K UNIVERSIT Y PRES S New York and London

NEW YOR K UNIVERSIT Y PRES S New Yor k an d Londo n Copyright © 199 8 b y Ne w Yor k Universit y All right s reserve d Library o f Congres s Cataloging-in-Publicatio n Dat a Spurlock, Joh n C , 1954 New an d improve d : the transformatio n o f America n women' s emotional cultur e / John C . Spurloc k an d Cynthi a A . Magistro . p. cm . — (Th e histor y o f emotion s series ) Includes bibliographica l reference s an d index . ISBN 0-8147-8045- 8 (clot h : alk. paper ) 1. Women—United States—History—20t h century . 2 . Women—Unite d States—Psychology—History—20th century . 3 . Emotions—Socia l aspects—United States—History—20t h century . 4 . Unite d States—Social lif e an d customs—20t h century—Psychologica l aspects. 5 . Emotion s i n literature . I . Magistro , Cynthi a A. , 1956 II. Title . III . Series : History o f emotio n series . HQ1420 .S6 8 199 8 305.4'o973'o904—ddc2i 98-905 0 CIP New Yor k Universit y Pres s book s ar e printe d o n acid-fre e paper , and thei r bindin g material s ar e chose n fo r strengt h an d durability . Manufactured i n th e Unite d State s o f Americ a 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

To Lucille Spurlock and the memory of Lawton M.

Spurlock

JCS

To Rhoda Louise Kraft Magistro and Philip John Magistro CAM

Contents

Preface i

x

i. Sel f an d Emotio n i n th e Earl y Twentiet h Centur y i 2. Flamin g Yout h 1

7

3. Th e Singl e Woman 5

3

4. Th e Flappe r Wif e 8

7

5. Th e Silve r Cor d 11

7

6. Th e Fountai n 15

1

Notes 17

1

Index 20

7

About th e Author s 21

3

Vll

Preface

This i s a stud y o f th e emotiona l live s o f adolescen t an d adul t wome n i n the Unite d State s i n th e earl y twentiet h century . W e assum e tha t cultur e plays a n importan t rol e i n shapin g th e emotion s o f individuals . Conse quently, w e hav e relie d o n th e wor k o f cultura l an d socia l historians , especially work s i n th e relativel y ne w fiel d o f histor y o f th e emotions . Following a lon g traditio n i n th e periodizatio n o f th e twentiet h century , we se e th e 1910 s throug h th e earl y 1930 s a s a tim e o f transitio n fro m Victorian t o moder n culture , and i n the chapters tha t follo w w e describ e the majo r cultura l change s tha t shape d th e live s o f America n women . Yet ou r approac h ha s bee n t o writ e cultura l histor y a s personal history . Although w e hav e rea d widel y i n th e cultura l material s o f ou r period , we hav e als o closel y studie d th e writing s o f wome n comin g o f ag e an d living throug h thei r adul t live s i n th e 1910 s throug h th e earl y 1920s . Through thei r writings, we have attempted t o understand ho w individua l women appropriate d th e cultura l message s o f thi s perio d an d use d the m to understan d an d t o shap e thei r experience s o f friendship , love , moth erhood, loss , and loneliness . Relying o n th e persona l writing s o f wome n ha s shape d ou r wor k i n two ways . First , th e diaries , letters , an d reminiscence s o f approximatel y fifty women, bor n betwee n 188 7 an d 1916 , hav e helpe d se t th e agend a for ou r research . Althoug h w e bega n readin g primar y document s wit h a set o f question s an d topic s t o consider , th e self-writing s o f wome n ofte n led u s to ne w questions . Most o f th e emotiona l issue s that w e explore i n the chapters tha t follo w emerge d no t fro m th e cultural material s that w e read bu t fro m th e concern s o f wome n experiencin g thes e emotions . SecIX

x Preface ond, women' s writing s hav e give n u s th e bes t source s availabl e fo r un derstanding th e live d experienc e o f emotion . Wome n ma y hav e writte n to protes t gende r imbalance s o r t o clai m thei r distinctiv e voice , but the y also wrot e t o understan d an d shap e thei r feelings. 1 Thei r writing s allo w us t o explor e th e cultur e o f th e first decade s o f thi s centur y fro m th e perspective o f emotionall y engage d participants . Women's word s mak e clea r th e turning awa y fro m th e Victorian pas t toward moder n culture . Wome n worke d t o adop t th e emotiona l style s of th e ne w century . Ye t we hav e found , i n ever y stag e o f thei r lives , that women frequentl y faile d t o liv e out th e emotiona l image s they had take n as thei r own . A persisten t tensio n underla y th e emotiona l live s o f earl y twentieth-century women . Althoug h embracin g th e new emotiona l style , women struggle d wit h lingerin g message s fro m Victoria n source s an d with thei r ow n failur e t o successfull y manag e emotion s o r t o navigat e the century' s ne w emotiona l demands . Of course , claim s abou t th e experienc e o f wome n mus t com e wit h many caveats . Thi s stud y deal s wit h white , middle-clas s women . Eve n within thi s narro w category , th e wome n w e hav e studie d ar e largel y Protestant, bette r educated , an d mor e articulat e tha n wome n i n the pop ulation a t large . Thes e wome n cam e fro m al l part s o f th e Unite d States , but the y tende d t o liv e i n th e middl e Atlanti c an d Ne w Englan d states . Although w e d o no t clai m t o hav e foun d a representativ e sample , w e have worke d t o provid e generalization s abou t ou r diarist s tha t resonat e with th e experienc e o f a muc h wide r rang e o f America n wome n i n th e 1920s an d 1930s . We foun d unpublishe d diarie s mos t usefu l fo r providin g insight s int o the comple x an d vivi d emotiona l live s o f women . Amon g th e unpub lished diarie s eight stand ou t as particularly detaile d an d extensive . These diaries, wit h thei r length y description s o f emotiona l experience s an d comments o n cultura l materials , allowe d u s t o ente r th e emotiona l worlds o f th e writers . Th e lon g entrie s o f thes e diarie s als o len t them selves t o textua l analysi s o f th e meaning s tha t wome n gav e t o thei r ex periences.2 Thes e wome n kep t diarie s ove r man y year s an d throug h a number o f importan t lif e transitions . Thu s fo r eac h on e w e sa w consis tency i n personal styl e across a variety o f developmenta l tasks , including courtship, career decisions , and marriag e o r motherhoo d o r both . While diary-keepin g seem s t o hav e bee n fairl y commo n i n th e earl y twentieth century , th e wome n wh o wrot e frequentl y i n thei r diarie s fo r decades may hav e differed fro m thei r contemporarie s i n important ways .

Preface x

i

The persisten t diarist s ma y hav e bee n mor e introspective , mor e sensitiv e to emotiona l experiences . O n th e othe r hand , recent theories o f women' s development stres s th e importanc e o f bot h feeling s an d relationship s fo r women generally . Ou r diarists , wh o wrot e abou t thes e thing s i n detail , seem onl y t o hav e mor e consistentl y verbalize d tha n othe r wome n th e entangled an d ineffabl e femal e experience s o f relatednes s an d desire. 3 The us e o f diarie s als o raise s th e issu e o f deception . Al l diarist s con struct, t o varyin g degrees , th e picture s the y woul d lik e t o hav e o f them selves from cultura l scripts . One of our diarists , now in her early eighties, added a n annotatio n t o a statemen t sh e ha d mad e i n he r 1920 s dairies : "Lies!" 4 Still , th e sensitivit y o f thes e wome n t o cultura l script s mean s that, a s w e becam e bette r acquainte d wit h bot h thei r diarie s an d thei r cultural contexts , w e coul d fairl y accuratel y identif y wher e the y foun d images an d ideals . Thi s sam e familiarit y als o mad e i t abundantl y clea r when scripts , images , an d ideal s faile d t o matc h th e emotion s o f th e moment. We hav e attempte d t o correc t fo r possibl e blin d spot s amon g persist ent diarists b y setting their experiences within contexts provided b y other kinds o f self-writing . A secon d grou p o f approximatel y twent y wome n wrote diarie s o r letter s that , althoug h les s extensive tha n thos e describe d above, serv e a s importan t source s o f informatio n abou t th e cultura l forces shapin g women' s emotiona l experiences . Thes e wome n wrot e close to th e tim e tha t the y experience d th e emotion s the y described , an d in thi s sens e the y shar e wit h th e first grou p a n immediac y tha t ofte n vividly portray s th e emotiona l conflict s an d reward s tha t the y experi enced. However , th e usefulnes s o f thes e writing s wa s limite d b y thre e considerations. (1 ) Man y o f thes e diarie s o r collection s ha d bee n edite d for publicatio n an d omitte d detail s o f everyda y lif e o r private matter s o r both. (2 ) Som e o f thes e work s ha d limite d discussion s o f emotiona l is sues. (3 ) Som e dealt with limite d tim e periods o r dimension s o f women' s lives. Edythe Weiner's diar y fro m he r sophomor e yea r in high school, fo r instance, i s a ric h sourc e fo r understandin g th e emotiona l trial s o f ado lescent girls, but i t deal s with onl y on e year . Women i n ou r thir d grou p wrot e letters , reminiscences, memoirs, and autobiographies mor e distan t fro m th e live d experienc e o f emotio n tha n the work s i n eithe r o f th e firs t tw o groups . Thes e work s ar e inevitabl y mediated b y concern s fo r self-presentatio n differen t fro m thos e o f women writin g onl y fo r themselve s o r thei r mos t intimat e friends . Thes e works primaril y serve d t o provid e example s an d verificatio n o f theme s

xii Freface identified i n th e writing s o f ou r cor e o f persisten t diarists . The work s i n this thir d grou p generall y provide d les s detail , les s emotiona l emphasis , and les s candor tha n th e wor k o f wome n i n the tw o othe r groups . By matchin g th e concern s an d experience s o f persisten t diarist s t o those expresse d i n othe r self-writings , w e se e pattern s o f consistenc y i n women's lives . Often w e ca n furthe r exten d th e applicabilit y o f thi s pat tern throug h th e us e o f contemporar y socia l scienc e o r popula r culture . The tensio n create d b y th e ne w heterosexua l freedom , fo r instance , ap pears repeatedl y i n th e cinem a o f the earl y decade s o f th e century, i n th e comments o f peopl e interviewe d i n Muncie , Indiana, an d i n the writing s of women. Although th e culture beckone d wome n t o greater sexua l pleasure, that pleasur e ofte n seeme d difficul t t o achieve . Taken together , th e experience s o f th e wome n i n thi s stud y illustrat e the rang e o f emotiona l possibilitie s availabl e t o mos t middle-clas s women livin g i n th e 1920 s an d 1930s . I n th e chapter s tha t follow , w e explore that range through th e stories of individual women. The chapter s reflect th e stage s o f lif e tha t thes e wome n woul d hav e recognized : ado lescence, young adulthoo d o r singlehood , marriage, motherhood. Not al l of these women participate d equall y i n these culturally prescribed stages , and w e attemp t t o d o som e justice to the variety o f their lif e experiences . Each chapte r provide s a summar y o f th e majo r cultura l message s abou t emotional lif e for wome n a t particular stage s of life and show s how thes e women appropriate d thos e message s an d ideals . In addition , eac h chap ter describe s th e difficultie s tha t wome n encountere d whe n cultur e proved a n inadequat e guid e t o emotiona l life . Although an y boo k require s a grea t dea l o f work , fro m th e beginnin g we hav e bee n pleasantl y awar e o f th e goo d luc k tha t mad e writin g thi s book possible , especially th e help of friends an d colleagues . Peter Stearn s extended hi s suppor t an d hi s goo d advic e a t th e ver y beginnin g o f ou r venture int o th e histor y o f emotions . H e late r helpe d mov e ou r wor k from it s early stage s t o th e prospectu s fo r th e presen t book , an d h e gav e helpful suggestion s fo r revisin g an earl y draft o f the book. Jan Lewi s also read an d commente d o n portion s o f thi s manuscript . Ou r edito r a t Ne w York University , Jennife r Hammer , prove d a n invaluabl e guid e prio r t o and durin g th e publicatio n process . Ne w Yor k Universit y Pres s als o made a wis e choic e i n th e anonymou s reviewe r fo r thi s work , whos e comments helpe d an d encourage d ou r revisions . We relie d o n th e competenc e an d friendlines s o f staf f a t th e Schlesin -

Preface xii

i

ger Library , Radcliff e College , wher e mos t o f ou r researc h wa s con ducted, an d a t th e Huntingto n Librar y i n Sa n Marino , California , an d the Vassa r Colleg e Library . Th e staf f a t th e Sophi a Smit h Collection , Smith College , readil y extende d thei r help , especiall y Am y Hagu e wh o guided u s durin g ou r earl y visit s t o th e paper s o f som e o f ou r mos t important diarists . Th e us e o f th e paper s o f Glady s Bel l Penro d wa s possible becaus e o f th e generosit y o f Iva n McGee , Directo r o f th e Indi ana Count y Historica l an d Genealogica l Society . We als o wis h t o than k Suzanne Oh l o f the Tyrone Historical Society . The papers were identifie d by th e Gende r Studie s surve y a t Seto n Hil l Colleg e unde r th e directio n of Chri s Mueseler . Our hom e bas e was the Reeve s Memorial Library , Seto n Hill College , where Denis e Stich a an d othe r staf f too k ou r unendin g interlibrar y loa n requests i n strid e an d seeme d capabl e o f finding virtuall y everythin g w e asked for . Th e Facult y Developmen t Committe e a t Seto n Hil l College , under th e leadershi p o f Bernadett e Fondy , helpe d ou r projec t fro m th e beginning, wit h suppor t fo r trave l t o conferences , release d time , an d sabbatical leave . Student s a t Seto n Hil l als o ha d a han d i n ou r work , especially Mary Ciccoccioppo , Alison Mahany , an d Tany a Scalzitti . Friends an d colleague s rea d portion s o f th e wor k an d provide d in sights int o th e arcan a o f pas t time s o r specia l disciplines , includin g Ji m Reed, John Gillis , Foster Jones, Jill Kelly , Kurt Piehler , Bonni e Gorscak , Alvaro Barriga , Phili p Cushman , an d Constanc e Fischer . Lynor e Ban choff an d other s contributed durin g the morning stud y group discussion s at th e annua l meeting s o f th e Societ y fo r Value s i n Highe r Education . We als o benefitte d fro m comment s an d discussion s o f ou r wor k a t th e Lewis an d Clar k Gende r Studie s Symposiu m an d th e encouragemen t o f the symposium' s chair , Jane Hunter . Beth Twigga r Gof f gav e u s he r candi d an d usefu l comment s abou t our readin g o f he r diary . Mr . an d Mrs . DeLan e Penro d encourage d ou r project an d als o provide d tellin g detail s abou t th e lif e o f Mr . Penrod' s mother, th e first diaris t w e studied , Glady s Bel l Penrod . We ow e a n immeasurabl e deb t t o ou r families . Charle s an d Paulin e Arneson, Donn a an d Ric k Bimeal , Louis e an d Ro n Bennett , an d Dan i and Phi l Magistro provided logistica l support. Most important , we could not hav e writte n thi s boo k withou t th e suppor t an d encouragemen t o f our spouses , Rebecca Spurloc k an d Davi d Mente , and ou r children, Rut h and Esther , an d Emil y an d Julia .

I

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

In Februar y 191 8 Viol a White , a graduate o f Wellesley Colleg e workin g as a cler k typis t i n Ne w Yor k City , attende d a reviva l give n b y th e evangelist Willia m Biedernolf . A n Episcopalia n an d a socialist , Whit e probably attende d ou t o f curiosity . He r journa l entr y o n th e event mixe s sarcasm an d exasperation . "Ther e wa s considerabl e old-fashione d emo tionalism bot h i n audienc e an d speaker, " sh e wrote , "th e usua l front seat bor e wh o snort s 'prais e th e Lord ' wheneve r th e speake r make s a point yo u migh t hav e like d t o hear , a goo d dea l abou t white-haire d mother waitin g o n th e othe r side , and littl e children a t the gate o f the St . Louis Expositio n (Whit e City ) fo r heaven , an d th e glass y eye s o f th e dying infidel." 1 While Whit e dismisse d th e reviva l wit h a literar y tur n o f phrase — "the sor t o f thin g yo u can' t snee r a t i f yo u ar e a decen t huma n being , and can' t respec t i f you're a thinking one"—sh e ma y hav e fel t draw n t o the "old-fashioned emotionalism " sh e disdained. Her passage also shows a clea r consciousnes s o f wha t Congregationalis t ministe r J . H . Deniso n in 192 8 calle d "emotiona l culture. " Accordin g t o Denison , "ever y suc cessful civilizatio n ha s owe d it s succes s t o a n elaborat e syste m b y whic h certain emotion s wer e cultivated. " H e believe d tha t ever y societ y re quired commo n emotiona l experience s to maintain it s "inner coherence " and that bot h custo m an d religio n cultivated sociall y valuable emotions. 2 His concept o f emotiona l cultur e resonates with som e areas of emotiona l research i n sociology , psychology , an d histor y durin g th e las t thirt y 1

2 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

years. A shif t i n th e metaphorica l understandin g o f emotio n ha s take n place ove r severa l centurie s i n wester n Europ e an d America . Th e pas sions, which acte d o n Achilles in the Iliad, seemed t o come from outside , a gif t o r curse from th e gods. In more recent centuries, emotion appeare d as the property o f the individual , a s it still does in day-to-day discussion . Some contemporar y psychologists , however , hav e shifte d th e metapho r again, seein g emotio n a s a produc t o f "reflectiv e thought " o r o f rol e playing.3 Culture become s fa r mor e importan t i n understandin g th e expressio n of emotio n a s the metaphorica l understandin g shift s awa y fro m interna l processes towar d socia l roles . For middle-clas s wome n i n the nineteent h century, feeling s gre w i n th e contex t o f distinctivel y femal e spheres . Warm relation s wit h mothers , othe r femal e relatives , an d femal e friend s formed th e bedroc k o f socia l connectio n an d emotiona l experience . Th e single mos t importan t bridg e betwee n th e separat e sphere s wa s court ship. Throug h th e convention s o f callin g an d lon g acquaintance , court ship allowed youn g wome n an d me n slowl y to ope n t o one another thei r inmost an d secre t selve s an d t o understan d member s o f th e opposit e se x as the y neve r ha d before . Courtin g couple s hel d t o a standar d o f pre marital chastity , becaus e o f mora l scruple s an d fea r o f accidenta l preg nancy. Thi s undoubtedl y increase d th e intensit y o f feeling s o f the coupl e for on e another . Wome n als o ha d t o tak e specia l pain s t o assur e them selves o f thei r lover' s commitmen t becaus e o f th e limit s o f economi c alternatives t o marriage for women . Marriage exercise d an extraordinar y influence o n women' s lives . Th e statu s o f thei r husband s becam e thei r own status . Yet the networ k o f friend s tha t wome n buil t u p durin g thei r youth continue d an d provide d continuit y i n thei r lives . Th e woman' s sphere ofte n too k o n greate r importanc e a s Victoria n wome n age d an d the passion s o f romanc e fade d somewha t whil e th e dutie s o f wif e an d husband too k mor e an d mor e o f th e couple' s time . The grea t experienc e of th e woman' s lif e coul d b e expected wit h th e birt h o f childre n an d th e transformation o f wif e int o mother. 4 Every cultur e elaborate s it s ow n emotionolog y o r se t o f evaluation s of emotion . Romantic s an d Victorian s alik e prize d sentiment , ye t b y th e early twentiet h centur y "sentimental " woul d becom e a pejorativ e de scription o f th e Victoria n era . On e o f th e larg e trend s withi n America n emotionology ha s bee n th e shif t sinc e th e nineteent h centur y fro m a positive regar d fo r mos t intens e emotiona l experience s towar d a suspi cion o f emotiona l intensity . A t th e sam e time , ne w evaluation s o f som e

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 3 emotions entere d America n culture . Emotion s suc h a s grie f an d anger , which Victorian s embraced , cam e t o see m mainl y negative . Lik e Bo b Cratchit, i n Dickens' s A Christmas Carol, wh o urge d hi s family neve r t o forget Tin y Tim , Victoria n American s hel d o n t o thei r grie f a s a livin g connection t o departe d love d ones . B y 191 9 Joh n Watson , th e founde r of behaviorism , calle d grie f " a maladjustmen t period " tha t normall y "disappears a s soo n a s ne w object s ar e foun d o r ne w conditione d re flexes hav e bee n entrained." 5 The changin g emotionolog y signale d a shif t i n ever y part o f women' s lives. Th e separat e sphere s o f th e nineteent h centur y decline d i n impor tance wit h th e growt h o f a n adolescen t pee r cultur e an d greate r wor k opportunities fo r women . Wome n gre w u p i n a world tha t prize d social izing betwee n th e sexes , and the y rejecte d th e sentimenta l an d repressiv e courtship practice s o f th e nineteenth century . They date d man y men an d exchanged caresse s wit h man y o f thos e dates . Wit h s o man y me n t o choose from , moder n wome n expecte d t o find th e righ t man , th e matc h who woul d chang e thei r live s an d mak e possibl e a marriag e o f compan ionship an d goo d sex . Motherhood , onc e considere d th e pures t an d highest o f th e passions , los t som e o f it s importanc e an d muc h o f it s intensity. Moder n wome n expecte d fulfillmen t i n marriage , companion ship, o r career . Lik e th e stereotypica l flappe r wh o too k u p smokin g an d necking wit h gusto , modern wome n too k u p ne w emotiona l experience s with blith e courage, actively seeking up-to-date version s of love and hap piness an d wer e relieve d tha t the y live d i n a n ag e fre e fro m tabo o an d prudery. Yet emotional experience s rarely matched expectations . Women ofte n found thei r dream s an d desire s frustrated , eve n whe n the y worke d t o meet the cultural prescriptions fo r fulfillmen t an d happiness. The tensio n between emotiona l cultur e an d emotiona l experienc e ha d man y sources . Living in a period o f transition durin g the early establishment o f the ne w emotional norms , man y wome n foun d tha t the y harbore d conflictin g values—Victorian an d moder n point s o f vie w migh t see m equall y com pelling at different time s and i n different situations . Yet the pervasivenes s and persuasivenes s o f ne w emotiona l formula s sometime s le d wome n t o embrace standard s an d ideal s tha t faile d t o matc h thei r ow n need s o r their live d reality . Althoug h moder n cultur e provide d th e tool s fo r un derstanding an d managin g feelings , i t als o se t u p expectation s tha t lef t women disappointe d o r ambivalen t abou t thei r ow n experience . Commentators durin g th e 1920 s an d historian s sinc e the n hav e

4 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

agreed tha t th e culture change d mor e rapidly an d profoundl y fo r wome n than fo r men . Th e "ne w woman, " "th e ne w freedom, " an d th e "sexua l revolution" al l referre d t o cultura l change s tha t move d youn g wome n out o f th e Victoria n hom e an d int o th e publi c real m tha t me n ha d lon g claimed a s their own . The wome n whos e journals , letters, reminiscences, and autobiographie s provid e the source s fo r thi s study were at the cente r of thi s transformatio n o f America n emotiona l culture . White , middl e class, an d wel l educated , thes e wome n studie d an d adopte d th e ne w culture throug h magazine s an d movie s an d practice d i t i n parke d cars , dorm rooms , offices , an d suburba n homes . Th e diarist s amon g thes e women als o reflecte d o n thi s ne w cultur e an d thei r experienc e o f lif e i n it. The y poure d ou t thei r feeling s i n line s writte n clos e to th e experienc e of passio n an d i n som e way s performe d thei r feeling s an d passio n i n their writing . Our collectio n o f diarists , memoirists , an d autobiographer s offer s in sights int o th e experience s tha t middle-clas s wome n ha d o f America n culture an d int o th e way s tha t cultur e shape d women' s emotiona l lives . The rang e o f th e middl e class , eve n i n th e 1920s , wa s extraordinary , a s women fro m farm s an d working-clas s familie s claime d cultura l ideal s in common wit h muc h wealthie r wome n fro m ol d Ne w Englan d families . Although datin g an d companionat e marriag e ma y hav e sprea d unevenl y across th e country , b y th e mid-1 9 20s th e value s supportin g moder n courtship an d marriag e appeare d i n strikingl y simila r term s i n th e jour nals o f a rural schoolteache r i n Pennsylvani a an d th e daughte r o f a part ner i n th e Morga n bank . Bot h wome n suffere d fro m feeling s o f inade quacy an d emptiness , and bot h hope d fo r a passionate experienc e o f life . Whether thes e longing s cam e fro m thei r cultur e o r fro m thei r psych e (i f the tw o ca n b e separated) , th e share d feeling s poin t towar d genera l de velopments an d experience s amon g middle-clas s wome n i n th e Unite d States. Education of the Senses Although th e trend s tha t woul d mak e America n cultur e moder n an d pu t the impres s o f America n cultur e o n moder n cultur e throughou t th e world originate d i n th e lat e nineteent h century , thos e trend s becam e powerfully eviden t onl y afte r th e en d o f Worl d Wa r I and th e adoptio n of th e Prohibitio n Amendment . Accordin g t o varyin g accounts , Ameri cans eithe r gleefull y o r nervousl y abandone d th e comfortin g veritie s o f

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 5 nineteenth-century Victorianis m an d embrace d a cultur e o f "terribl e honesty." "P d a s soo n liv e i n a scumm y pon d a s i n th e atmospher e o f 19 2 1 ," wrot e Viola White a t the dawning o f the modern er a in American life, "unemploymen t al l about , hopelessnes s o n par k benches." 6 She saw around he r th e tattere d remain s o f th e Victoria n er a a s th e postwa r depression strangle d economi c activity . The boo m tha t followe d i n 192 2 would empt y Manhattan' s par k benche s an d bolste r th e emergin g cul ture o f materia l abundance . Th e desire s o f th e individua l i n th e ne w century becam e frame d a s a proble m t o b e solve d throug h ne w posses sions, thus creatin g a n opportunit y fo r thos e wit h good s t o sell . Depart ment store s an d advertisin g joine d wit h th e mas s medi a o f magazine s and movie s t o sho w moder n wome n an d me n th e shap e o f passion . Th e culture o f abundanc e an d consumptio n reshape d th e emotion s an d ex pectations tha t constitut e individua l identity . The Victoria n hom e ha d bee n th e centra l featur e o f a n emotiona l culture supporte d b y libera l Protestantis m an d sentimenta l literature . As a contras t t o an d a have n fro m th e world , th e hom e stoo d a s on e o f th e important division s withi n Victoria n society , separatin g th e sphere s o f men an d women . I n the world , me n labore d withi n a dynamic an d ofte n amoral econom y tha t transforme d everythin g i n it s path . Withi n th e home, othe r value s applied . Th e warmth o f th e home , and especiall y th e love o f mothers , sheltere d youn g live s fro m th e rigor s o f th e world . Within a spher e define d b y close , affectionat e ties , mother s an d femal e relatives an d friend s shape d th e live s o f childre n an d brough t the m t o adulthood wit h religiou s conviction s an d scrupulou s morality. 7 Whether i n th e hom e o r th e worl d middle-clas s Victorian s hel d u p a standard o f restrain t fo r thei r emotiona l lives . Earl y i n th e nineteent h century antislaver y orato r Theodor e Wel d ha d expresse d hi s ow n strug gle t o maintai n a n outwardl y cal m an d dignifie d bearing : " I a m constitutionally, a s fa r a s emotions ar e concerned , a quiverin g mas s o f inten sities kep t i n subjectio n onl y b y th e rod of iron i n th e stron g han d o f conscience an d reason. " Strategie s suc h a s assumin g th e appearanc e o f calm t o contro l ange r o r othe r passions , an d directin g ster n command s to oneself , coul d augmen t reaso n an d conscience . Eve n mother s ha d t o guard thei r emotion s t o sav e impressionabl e childre n fro m distress . Th e Victorian devotio n t o decoru m als o appeare d i n th e deman d fo r con formity t o publi c morality. 8 Fo r men , scrupulou s adherenc e t o mora l standards migh t b e waived—especiall y i f powerfu l sexua l drive s ha d t o be vented—as lon g as they maintained publi c standards. Women ha d n o

6 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

such loophole s i n thei r socia l contract . Th e purit y o f wif e an d mothe r stood a s a warran t fo r th e Victoria n hom e and , b y extension , o f th e Victorian socia l ideal . The divisio n betwee n hom e an d worl d ha d alread y begu n t o brea k down b y the en d o f the nineteenth century . The separat e sphere s and th e double standar d cam e unde r attack , initiall y fro m th e supporter s o f th e morality o f th e home . Reformer s demande d a singl e standar d o f behav ior, an d intellectual s demande d a new standar d o f "honesty " tha t mean t a willingnes s t o conside r fact s an d accep t conclusion s tha t Victorian s would hav e deeme d unfi t fo r discussion . Contemporar y observer s of fered a variet y o f cause s fo r th e transformatio n o f Victoria n culture , including war , Prohibition , jazz , an d racia l devolution . A conservativ e psychologist a t th e en d o f th e 1920 s calle d th e decad e "th e grea t ag e o f freedom; th e ag e o f glor y fo r hi m wh o ca n find anothe r ido l t o smas h and anothe r tabo o t o kil l b y bol d defiance. " Th e mos t usua l suspect , however, wa s th e economi c system , whic h ha d remaine d outsid e th e home an d outsid e it s moral compass. 9 And eve n though reformer s a t th e end o f th e nineteent h centur y hope d t o impos e th e home' s mora l imper atives i n th e world, i t was th e world tha t prevailed . Rather tha n mora l uplift , th e modern worl d value d consumption. Th e mass productio n technique s introduce d int o majo r America n industrie s in th e las t decade s o f th e nineteent h centur y transforme d th e livelihoo d and th e living conditions o f virtually al l Americans. Viola Good e Liddell , born i n 1902 , remembere d th e change s tha t th e ne w industria l ag e brought t o he r smal l tow n i n Alabam a followin g th e Worl d War—th e railroad, the mail order catalog , the gramophone, ragtime and Broadwa y music, bicycles , the n cars , an d the n electricit y an d th e telephone . An n Marie Lo w chronicle d th e appearanc e o f th e telephon e i n rura l Nort h Dakota i n 192 4 with it s party lin e that allowe d al l the neighbors to liste n to everyone' s calls . He r fathe r resiste d th e purchas e o f a radi o unti l th e 1930s an d the n wouldn' t allo w a loudspeake r i n th e house . Bu t talkin g movies ha d reache d th e are a b y 1929. 10 New technology , a s Liddel l an d Lo w reveal , mean t ne w possessions . By the 1920 s advertisin g picture d a democrac y o f commodities i n whic h the bount y o f mas s productio n becam e availabl e t o eve r greate r num bers. Th e middl e clas s gre w a s th e econom y create d mor e white-colla r jobs an d a s labor-savin g device s eliminate d som e o f th e nee d fo r ser vants. Th e rapi d chang e i n make s an d model s o f al l kind s o f ne w good s demanded a n expertis e tha t youn g peopl e seeme d t o acquir e mor e read -

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 7 ily tha n thei r parents . Advertisement s showe d individual s improvin g their live s an d gainin g happines s b y buyin g th e lates t goods . "I t i s all s o silly," a socia l worke r wrot e i n th e earl y year s o f th e Depressio n o f th e advertisements sh e saw , "nothin g bu t sham . Bac k o f it , o f course , i s th e whole syste m o f competition, " sh e added . Sh e might hav e note d furthe r that bac k o f i t stoo d ne w value s that rejecte d struggl e an d self-contro l i n favor o f what on e of her contemporaries calle d "consumptionism, " a life of abundanc e withou t pai n o r conflict. 11 A psychologist an d educato r writin g i n th e 1930 s lamente d th e "arti ficial characte r o f lif e induce d b y machin e production . I t ha s cas t u s adrift fro m ou r elementa l bearings , distorte d ou r perspective , an d to o often destroye d th e sincerit y o f ou r lives. " Along wit h th e growin g sep aration o f individual s fro m th e fruit s o f thei r labor , Melvi n Haggert y lamented th e los s o f th e "unit y o f ar t an d life, " whic h coul d satisf y th e natural huma n desir e for color , light , motion , an d craft. 12 Fo r a growin g proportion o f Americans , however , th e satisfaction s o f color , light , an d motion (a t least) thrived i n America's departmen t stores . The departmen t store becam e the schoo l o f the consumer society , enticing customers with its display s an d vas t arra y o f dr y good s an d educatin g shoppers ' sense s through colorfu l spectacles . The store s als o provide d shopper s wit h res taurants, music , an d chil d care , drawin g middle-clas s wome n int o a world o f comfor t an d eve n leisure. 13 Travel coul d sho w youn g wome n th e importanc e an d peculiarit y o f the American departmen t store . Jessamyn Wes t note d tha t ever y town i n England ha d a Woolworth's, bu t onl y th e bigges t Englis h empori a "ca n compare wit h an y shop in Los Angeles." Foreign correspondent Doroth y Thompson, wh o spen t mor e o f he r adul t lif e i n Europ e tha n i n middl e America, though t tha t th e chai n store s contribute d t o th e shoddines s o f American life . Sh e wrot e t o Sinclai r Lewi s o f th e man y store s vyin g fo r attention—not onl y Woolworth's , bu t Kresge's , McCrory's , Marshal l Fields, Piggly Wiggly, an d "innumerable " five, ten , an d twenty-fiv e cen t stores.14 "What I want th e stor e t o b e i s a littl e piec e o f th e moder n worl d at its best," say s th e fictional owne r o f a small-tow n departmen t stor e i n Dorothy Canfiel d Fisher' s The Homemaker. "I t i s my ambitio n t o mak e every tri p t o ou r stor e a s educativ e a s a n afternoo n tea-part y fo r th e women-folk o n a farm, " h e tell s a n admirin g ne w employee . " I wan t t o select fo r the m th e right things, th e thing s the y neve r coul d selec t fo r themselves fo r lac k o f training." 15 Th e first tri p t o a departmen t stor e

8 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

could becom e a majo r lif e even t fo r youn g wome n fro m rura l areas . Viola Liddel l wen t shoppin g i n Selm a fo r th e first tim e a s a teenager . Believing tha t dres s size s corresponde d t o ages , sh e aske d fo r a siz e six teen. Th e cler k provide d a rapi d an d probabl y scornfu l lesso n o n shop ping an d clothing , muc h t o Viola' s futur e benefit . Edyth e Weiner , livin g in Glen s Falls , New York , i n th e mid-1 9 20s, kne w departmen t store s a t age fourtee n muc h bette r tha n Viol a Liddel l di d a t sixteen . Edyth e de lighted i n her periodic trips to New York Cit y to buy shoes and clothes. 16 Clara Savage , a hardworkin g journalist , ha d littl e time t o recor d he r lif e in detai l i n he r prewa r diary , bu t sh e ofte n note d shoppin g trips . "Spen t half th e da y workin g an d hal f th e da y shopping, " sh e wrot e o f on e Saturday. "Mothe r an d I put i n hour s o f searchin g th e stores. " O n on e of he r trip s t o Wanamaker s sh e bega n t o fee l unwell . " I ha d t o li e dow n in thei r hospita l bu t di d th e shopping. " Savage woul d late r writ e fo r Good Housekeeping tha t "on e o f th e chief pleasure s o f man y a woman' s lif e i s in collectin g possessions " an d that "lifeles s things " suc h a s furnitur e an d clothin g coul d inspir e " a strong emotiona l attachment." 17 A dynami c capitalis m ha d create d a world o f abundance , an d advertisin g an d departmen t store s sough t t o enhance th e allur e o f good s wit h appeal s t o fundamenta l drive s o r emo tions. Th e cultur e o f consumptionis m no t onl y encourage d desir e fo r commodities, i t als o stresse d th e emotiona l valenc e o f commodities . Ad vertising agencie s an d departmen t store s recognize d tha t wome n spen t most o f th e household' s income . Advertisement s appeale d primaril y t o women, an d departmen t store s catere d t o th e presume d need s an d de sires o f women . Togethe r the y gav e object s charism a tha t coul d mak e shopping a n emotiona l catharsis . Mt . Holyok e Colleg e studen t Rut h Raymond rea d Frenc h unti l he r eye s tired an d the n bough t a n expensiv e Japanese scar f "a s a consolatio n fo r m y weariness. " Year s late r sh e stil l used shopping fo r consolation , althoug h thi s time the dress, shoes, rouge, and ta p slipper s wer e t o lighte n he r moo d afte r learnin g o f th e nee d fo r major denta l work. 18 Raymon d live d i n Massachusetts , bu t th e valu e o f shopping fo r emotiona l adjustmen t reache d int o th e South . Emil y Tap scott Clar k suffere d fro m heat , loneliness , an d a n irritatin g stepmothe r until "quit e suddenl y I bought a perfectly darlin g new dress," which me t with "gratifyin g appreciation." 19 Sometimes wome n foun d thei r desire s worrisome . " I woul d lov e t o believe, and I can't hel p thinkin g tha t clothe s shouldn' t matter, " wrot e a sensitive midwester n colleg e student ; "bu t I can' t kee p the m fro m mat -

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 9 tering." 20 Winifre d Willis , a write r livin g i n Ne w York , wante d mone y for onl y tw o things—"ravishin g clothe s & self-improvement. " Sh e then corrected hersel f fo r puttin g clothe s first befor e he r desir e fo r reading , study, an d travel . "Bu t I have a pagan worshi p o f clothes . I would arra y me resplendentl y ane w eac h thre e o r fou r hour s o f th e day. " Sh e wrot e of on e shoppin g trip , "Yesterda y I bough t a stunnin g ne w spor t suit, " and the n describe d th e "soft , whit e gow n wit h a brillian t orang e an d black jacket. " Sh e concluded, " O , I am s o happy!" 21 The Modern Self The consume r cultur e conspire d wit h industria l societ y t o reshap e th e modern self . By self we mean th e constellation o f experiences an d expec tations tha t a n individua l recognize s a s integral t o he r identity , tha t giv e meaning to her life , and tha t shap e her relationships with her society an d culture. American s fro m th e earl y nineteent h centur y ha d face d th e de mands o f adjusting behavio r an d appearanc e fo r divers e groups in a flui d social system . Etiquett e book s becam e advic e manual s fo r managin g so cial and geographi c mobility . Yet, even though Victorians recognized th e mutability o f publi c appearances , the y clun g t o a n idea l o f sel f a s a har d core o f inne r qualitie s an d desire s to b e kept secre t from al l but the mos t intimate o f friends . Fo r earl y twentieth-centur y Americans , th e sel f seemed fa r mor e fluid an d public. 22 Several trend s contribute d t o th e change s i n self-understanding . A s commodities proliferated , s o di d th e anxietie s an d desire s invente d b y advertisers. Thi s commodificatio n o f emotio n probabl y flattene d emo tional intensity . Durin g thes e sam e decade s th e expansio n an d transfor mation o f wor k an d societ y place d a premium o n a n individual' s abilit y to understand an d fi t into rapidly changing social settings. The Columbi a philosopher an d educato r Joh n Dewe y lamente d tha t i n th e moder n world individual s faile d t o find "suppor t an d commitment " a s partici pants i n " a socia l whole." 23 B y the 1920 s psychologist s an d sociologist s tended towar d th e vie w o f Harvar d psychologis t Willia m McDougal l that "i f a man belong s t o severa l groups , eac h havin g a distinc t code , he w i l l . . . b e liabl e t o develo p a s man y distinc t selves. " John Watson , th e behaviorist psychologis t an d advertisin g executive , disagree d energeti cally with McDougal l o n mos t issues , but h e defined personalit y i n ways that accorde d wit h McDougalP s vie w a s "a n individual' s tota l asset s . . . and liabilitie s . . . o n th e reactio n side, " o r mor e economicall y a s "th e

i o Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

end produc t o f our habit system. " Watson stresse d the adaptive respons e of the individual to the environment. The personality changes constantly , he wrote , "th e onl y adjuste d perso n i s a dea d person. " Fo r Victorian s the idea l o f characte r mediate d betwee n th e genuin e sel f an d th e demands o f society . Fo r moderns , th e demand s o f societ y becam e mor e diverse an d character mor e malleable , while sel f seeme d eithe r t o withe r away o r becam e conflate d wit h th e mi x o f demand s an d response s i n social interaction. 24 "I'm jus t beginnin g t o realiz e ho w man y differen t personalitie s on e has," wrot e colleg e studen t Marth a L a veil as she reflected o n the differ ent response s sh e made t o letters fro m differen t friends. 25 Th e perceived multiplicity o f th e sel f coul d cal l int o questio n th e genuinenes s o f any particular experienc e o f self. Anne Morrow , th e daughter o f the ambassador t o Mexico , keenl y fel t th e plasticit y o f lif e i n diplomati c socia l circles: "Thi s lif e i s so unreal—I don' t kno w wha t m y real smil e i s and what [is ] my part y one , what m y rea l feeling s ar e an d wha t [are ] the superficial ones." 26 Women ofte n fel t that there was "no one ready-made self behin d activities, " a s John Dewe y pu t it. 27 Thi s cas t doub t o n the emotional experience s o f the varying selve s in their man y socia l settings . Without th e certaint y o f a genuin e self , emotiona l experienc e require d confirmation othe r tha n it s self-evident existence . Middle-class wome n trie d t o pi n dow n th e chimer a o f self . The y watched fo r experience s tha t carrie d thei r ow n manifest o f authenticity . Moments o f reflectiv e self-awarenes s an d intense emotio n migh t appea r to fit extraordinarily wel l int o a n assumed scheme , or they migh t nudg e a youn g woma n int o a ne w an d unexpecte d realization . The y experi enced thes e moment s a s intense an d unmistakable epiphanies . In writing of a ne w plane tha t sh e and he r husban d wer e testing , Ann e Morro w Lindbergh wrote , "It was one of those few moments in life when you are absorbed an d overcom e b y the utter perfectio n o f a thing , lik e seein g a perfect ride r swin g a perfect pol o pony , o r watching th e Panama Cana l locks open , o r hearin g Harol d Samue l pla y Bach." 28 Doroth y Smit h Dushkin, a musicia n livin g i n Chicago , fel t move d b y th e vitalit y o f African American s i n a movie. "I f we only ha d more o f it—o r perhap s any—& wer e willin g t o express i t what a falling of f the offices o f nerv e doctors & psychiatrist s woul d have!" 29 Virtuall y ever y diaris t include d in thi s stud y reporte d moment s o f simila r emotiona l insigh t an d self awareness. Suc h moment s allowe d diarist s t o affir m o r t o refin e thei r self-understandings.

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century n

11

If some emotional experience s carried thei r ow n proo f o f authenticity , most o f emotiona l lif e depende d o n socia l an d cultura l cues . Movies , plays, popula r music , an d fiction, alon g wit h th e ever-presen t popula r advice literatur e i n newspaper s an d magazines , forme d a s wel l a s re flected th e emotiona l landscap e o f moder n America . Lik e th e railroa d and th e mail-orde r catalog , moder n cultur e migh t appea r i n th e live s o f young wome n piecemeal , a s no t alway s welcom e novelties . Glady s Hasty, wh o gre w u p i n rura l Maine , decide d agains t attendin g th e Uni versity o f Main e becaus e i t ha d "supplie d u s wit h a substitut e teache r who cam e i n lipstic k an d a blac k sil k dress." 30 I n rura l Pennsylvania , Gladys Bel l foun d th e jaz z sh e hear d ove r th e radi o intolerable . Ye t broadcasts o f classica l musi c appeale d t o her . "Suc h musi c ca n no t b e rivaled," sh e wrot e i n 1925 , "an d wha t a miracl e tha t w e ar e so enter tained a s we lie in ease and comfor t upo n ou r ow n diva n with absolutel y no inconveniences." 31 The seductiv e combinatio n o f technolog y an d moder n cultur e ap peared everywher e b y th e 1920 s i n motio n pictures . Contemporar y esti mates place d weekl y attendanc e a t betwee n seventy-seve n an d on e hun dred millio n wit h hal f th e America n populatio n attendin g a t leas t on e movie i n an y year . A movie's abilit y t o entertai n depende d o n it s abilit y to engag e th e passion s o f it s audience . "Ever y emotio n o f whic h ma n i s capable i s playe d t o b y thi s might y narrator, " on e stud y reported , an d American cinem a succeede d i n engagin g audience s aroun d th e world. 32 In England i n the late 1920 s Jessamyn West found nothin g bu t America n movies i n London . In Paris , sh e me t n o on e wh o ha d eve r hear d o f "Indiana, Iowa, and New Hampshire." But they knew about California — "its scenery , climate , fruit , movi e stars , earthquakes , gol d mines." 33 I n the mid-193o s Doroth y Dushki n an d he r husban d Davi d me t Igo r Stra vinsky an d David' s brothe r Sam , wh o ha d jus t performe d a concer t i n Chicago. Th e part y wen t t o a movi e "o f th e thriller sort—fighting , ro mance, torture, patriotism, gallantry , etc . They seeme d t o lov e it." 34 Even thoug h America n movie s claime d a universa l appea l t o elemen tal emotions , movie s succeede d o r faile d t o th e exten t tha t the y matche d the emotiona l value s an d standard s o f particula r group s withi n Ameri can society . Religiou s movies , lik e Ceci l B . DeMille' s Ten Commandments attracte d enormou s audience s wit h thei r nonsectaria n moralizing . Yet DeMille' s Joan of Arc faile d a t th e bo x offic e becaus e th e Roma n Catholic bishop s oppose d it s portraya l o f th e inquisitor. 35 Doroth y Smith, years befor e escortin g Stravinsk y t o a n American movie , took he r

12 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

Sunday schoo l class to se e Ben Hur. "Th e bes t movie I've eve r seen," she wrote i n he r diary , becaus e o f th e beautifu l portraya l o f Chris t an d be cause o f th e cinemati c spectacl e tha t include d "hair-raisin g thrills " an d colored pictures. 36 Katharin e D u Pr e Lumpkin , wh o gre w u p i n th e south, recalle d a 191 5 screenin g o f Birth of a Nation o n he r colleg e campus i n Florida. "Al l aroun d m e people sighe d an d shivered , an d no w and the n shoute d o r wept , i n thei r intensity." 37 Although th e impac t o f movie s coul d see m overpowerin g i n th e live s of individua l women , the y serve d mor e commonl y a s guide s t o moder n problems an d a s clue s t o emotiona l behavior . Fo r severa l week s afte r seeing Mickey, Glady s Bell , just beginnin g he r teachin g dutie s i n wester n Pennsylvania, too k o n th e person a o f th e carefre e heroin e o f th e Mac k Sennett comedy . In the years that followed , Bel l often resorte d t o movie s as source s o f idea s o r insight s fo r th e problem s sh e faced . Ye t th e larg e number o f movie s that sh e saw (sh e mentioned eleve n in her 192 2 diary ) gave he r a comparativ e sophisticatio n i n th e us e o f movie s a s source s o f life ideals . Glady s als o rea d widel y i n th e popula r literatur e o f th e day , and sh e tende d t o find comfor t i n Victoria n romanti c ideals , whethe r these appeare d i n movie s o r books. 38 An eve n mor e studie d sophisticatio n come s throug h i n th e reflection s of Rut h Raymond , whos e attendanc e a t movie s apparentl y too k th e place o f religiou s fervor . Sh e studie d Picture Flay an d Photoplay an d wrote o f th e live s o f celebritie s alon g wit h he r account s o f family , friends, an d teachers . Ruth' s comment s abou t movie s ofte n sho w a crit ical distanc e an d appraisal . Fo r th e first five month s o f 1935 , fo r in stance, sh e liste d thirty-si x movie s tha t sh e ha d attended , wit h shor t comments o n eac h movie . "Willia m Powel l an d Myrn a Lo y delicatel y comic," sh e wrot e o f The Thin Man. Sh e liste d th e mai n cas t member s of Marie Valente, concludin g "Go d bles s the m all. " Bu t o f Gridiron Flash she commented, "Eddi e Quille n with a gal who must have bartere d her virtu e fo r th e part; th e worst footbal l pictur e t o date. " She called th e plot o f Evergreen "idiotic " an d characterize d The Defense Rests a s "th e usual lega l melodrama." 39 As Rut h Raymond' s response s t o movie s suggests , middle-clas s women di d no t onl y passivel y absor b emotiona l culture . Rather , the y often appropriate d cultura l material s selectively , siftin g the m fo r wha t they considere d valuabl e a t th e moment . Althoug h the y generall y ac cepted th e ideal s the y sa w i n movie s an d rea d abou t i n th e mass-marke t

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 1

3

periodicals, the y als o struggle d t o fin d a fit betwee n thei r experience s and th e culture' s messages . The Therapeutic Culture Modern emotiona l cultur e depende d no t onl y o n new technologies i n the media bu t als o o n a ne w language . Fo r Victoria n women , evangelica l o r liberal Protestantism provide d th e most powerfu l an d pervasive languag e for understandin g huma n lif e an d distress . By late i n th e nineteent h cen tury, however , th e dram a o f si n an d redemptio n ha d begu n t o los e it s power. Many American s assumed tha t personal problems implied menta l distress an d searche d fo r treatment s tha t woul d mak e a difference . Th e traditional an d widel y popula r therapie s know n a s min d cur e continue d their vogu e i n th e 1920s . Th e best-sellin g wor k o n min d cur e o f th e 1920s, Emile Coue' s Self-Mastery through Conscious Autosuggestion of fered a progra m o f self-improvemen t tha t require d th e frequen t repeti tion o f th e individual' s goals . Actres s Lillia n Rot h use d Coue' s metho d for a proble m wit h on e o f he r hands , an d dance r Jan e Sherma n trie d autosuggestion t o kee p her weigh t unde r control . Christia n Science , with its classi c Science and Health b y Mar y Bake r Eddy , ofte n appear s i n young women' s diarie s i n time s o f troubl e o r persona l change. 40 By 1920 , however, min d cur e would mak e wa y fo r an d i n som e case s assimilate t o th e ne w therapeuti c viewpoint s associate d wit h Freu d an d psychoanalysis. Marjori e Kinnan' s 191 8 intervie w wit h a psychoanalys t reveals th e dawnin g o f th e Freudia n er a i n America n therap y an d th e limited inroad s tha t Freudia n languag e ha d mad e u p t o tha t time . Kin nan believe d tha t sh e felt mixe d up , "as i f I were groping i n a mist" afte r the intervie w becaus e o f th e "psychi c radiation " th e psychoanalys t ha d given off . Sh e believed i t would mak e he r morbi d t o ente r th e professio n and kno w "th e mos t intimat e core s o f people' s live s an d thoughts, " which the y revea l "unde r thi s sor t o f hypnoti c psycho-analysis—unde r it they deliver up their very souls. It involves sex a great deal, you know — it might b e fearfully unhealthy." 41 Eve n i n the lat e 1920 s psychoanalysi s seemed ne w t o uppe r middle-clas s Ne w Englanders . Th e autho r Joh n Marquand "flun g himsel f wit h a wil l int o deridin g th e whol e ba g o f tricks," althoug h h e and hi s wife delivere d themselve s t o analysis as their marriage brok e up. 42 In New Yor k b y the late 1920s , Freudian idea s an d the necessit y o f treatmen t ha d gaine d wid e acceptance . Th e youn g

14 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

painter lon e Robinso n dreade d partie s wit h he r artisti c friend s becaus e she alway s fel t uncomfortabl e i n conversations "tha t I don't understan d which see m to be mostly abou t bein g psychoanalyzed." 43 Marth a Lavel l studied psychoanalysi s fo r th e first tim e i n graduate schoo l an d consid ered i t "the most preposterou s illogica l stuf f tha t anyon e could thin k up. Yet," sh e continued, "m y reaction merel y proves the m right." 44 Many o f the terms an d concepts o f psychoanalysis ha d becom e pop ularly accepte d i n the United State s b y the mid-1920s. Rut h Raymond , sixteen i n 1925 , wondere d wh y her "sub-consciou s min d seeme d deter mined t o dwel l o n David, " a forme r boyfriend. 45 A fe w year s late r a fourteen-year-old Edyth e Weine r i n Glen s Fall s gav e hersel f a probin g self-examination an d conclude d tha t sh e was "to o self-conscious " an d had " a fou l inferiorit y complex." 46 Remark s suc h as these appear almos t universally i n the private reflection s o f middle-clas s wome n fro m abou t 1920 onward . The y believe d tha t th e subconscious, complexes, and neuroses al l lurked withi n th e self, an d this adde d t o the sense of the self as a multilayere d entity , no t entirel y rationa l an d no t entirel y unde r th e command o f the will. In sum , by the 1920s , the profound an d secret sel f tha t wome n i n the nineteenth centur y treasure d ha d changed int o a far more malleabl e and public self. Advertising constantl y offere d t o fulfill som e presumed desir e of th e self, whether fo r socia l acceptanc e o r a better marriag e o r roman tic love . Desire , an d the products t o satisf y desire , appeare d everywher e in America n culture , an d many middle-clas s wome n derive d som e emo tional satisfactio n fro m shoppin g fo r an d displayin g ne w commodities . Advertising revenue s mad e possibl e othe r guide s fo r emotion , especiall y the mass-marke t magazine s tha t proliferate d durin g th e decade. Movie s also provide d instructio n o n emotiona l life . Ye t the shallowness o f thi s sense o f sel f als o ofte n becam e evident , an d wome n searche d fo r mor e profound emotiona l experience s an d fo r a bette r understandin g o f the mysteries o f thei r unconsciou s minds . Take n together , thes e source s of self-knowledge ofte n showe d remarkabl e continuity . Popularize d Freud ian theme s appeare d i n movies, advertiser s use d th e latest psychologica l ideas, and magazines generall y promote d emotiona l style s drawn fro m a variety o f popular sources . During th e 1920 s an d 1930s , a wid e rang e o f idea s presente d emo tions a s far mor e th e product o f cultur e o r eve n persona l manipulatio n than o f innat e reflexes . Dal e Carnegie' s popula r talk s durin g th e 1920 s led t o his best-selling motivationa l handbook , How to Win Friends and

Self and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century 1

5

Influence People (1936 ) i n whic h h e offere d strategie s fo r shapin g th e emotions o f others. 47 J. H. Denison, a s noted above , had already offere d his analysi s o f the cultural suppor t fo r particular emotiona l experiences . Sociologists influence d b y behavioris m downplaye d instinc t a s a socia l determinant. Georg e Herbert Mea d an d others wrote of the developmen t of the self, includin g emotion , withi n a social context. "Piecemea l ou t of his socia l contact s th e chil d build s u p hi s self, " wrot e socia l historia n Arthur Calhoun . Margare t Mead , writin g hom e fro m Samo a i n 1925, observed th e striking chang e i n the demeanor o f the islanders whe n th e curfew-angelus bel l ran g aroun d sunset . Everyon e ra n for cove r an d began recitin g th e Lord's Prayer , "whil e flowers ar e all taken ou t of thei r hair an d the siva son g stop s i n the middle." A s soon a s the bell rang the second time , however , "solemnity—neve r o f a ver y reliabl e depth—i s sloughed off." 48 Just a s th e sel f emerge s fro m a socia l an d cultura l context , s o d o emotions. Cultur e provide s th e stories , images , an d ideal s tha t allo w individuals t o understan d thei r feeling s a s this o r tha t kin d o f emotion . Yet individual s als o actively , althoug h perhap s no t alway s consciously , shape emotiona l experience. 49 Viol a White' s observation s o f the reviva l recognized th e emotiona l weigh t o f image s suc h a s th e "white-haire d mother" an d the "glassy eye s of the dying infidel." Write r Carolin e Gor don note d th e importance o f manipulatin g emotiona l message s fo r spe cific audiences . Editor' s a t Scribner's, sh e wrote , wante d "storie s wit h real emotio n i n them," whic h apparentl y mean t storie s abou t murde r o r sudden death. 50 Psychoanalysis, lik e min d cure , fits int o a broade r therapeuti c view point tha t hel d tha t emotion s coul d b e intentionall y managed . A s we saw above , shoppin g coul d offe r a means o f changing emotions . Proba bly the most commo n strateg y fo r overcoming sorro w o r depression was to emphasiz e th e goo d thing s i n life . "O f cours e I a m lucky, " wrot e Gladys Bel l Penrod, i n "so many way s tha t I must pas s b y my moment s of unhappiness." 51 A Good Housekeeping articl e advise d wome n tha t most worrie s cam e fro m losin g a proper sens e o f proportion. Instea d of allowing hersel f t o become wrappe d u p in these things, a woman shoul d meditate o n "thos e thing s tha t ar e beautifu l an d o f goo d report , thos e things tha t trul y mak e lif e wort h th e living. . . . Worry i s a sure sign tha t there i s something wron g wit h one' s wa y of living." 52 Yet fo r al l their consciousnes s abou t th e cultural source s o f emotion , and i n spite of their ow n attempts t o manage them , emotio n stil l seeme d

16 Self

and Emotion in the Early Twentieth Century

to mos t youn g wome n i n th e 1920 s t o aris e fro m source s dee p withi n themselves an d t o appea r almos t capriciously . "Wh y shoul d sudde n bot tomless despai r drow n m e without an y know n cause? " wondered Doro thy Smith , a youn g musicia n jus t returne d fro m Pari s i n 1928 . Eve n though sh e had entere d psychoanalysi s t o dea l with he r recurring depression, her emotiona l experienc e seeme d beyon d he r control an d he r grasp. "I a m well , stron g &c o f norma l brai n &c reactions— I can' t b e a prey t o mental mani a o r mysteriou s psychosis. " Glady s Bel l Penrod , frustrate d with he r effort s a t self-management , wondere d wh y sh e could not "laug h at th e littl e ungratefu l gir l wh o live s insid e me , wh o i s alway s pityin g herself."53 In the chapter s tha t follow , w e examin e bot h emotionolog y an d emo tion. Fo r eac h period o f a woman's growt h fro m adolescenc e to maturit y her cultur e prescribe d bot h relationship s an d emotiona l experiences . By studying th e self-writin g o f earl y twentieth-centur y women , w e discove r how middle-clas s wome n understoo d an d appropriate d thi s culture . Bu t we ca n als o observ e the m a s they reflec t o n thei r experienc e o f emotion , as the y compar e thei r experienc e wit h thei r ow n understandin g o f cul tural expectations . Almos t alway s w e fin d a tension betwee n emotionol ogy an d emotiona l experience . Thi s tensio n betwee n th e desir e t o fulfil l cultural norm s an d th e ofte n ambivalen t feeling s an d passion s that mad e up thei r live s wa s a t th e hear t o f th e emotiona l experienc e o f moder n women.

2

Flaming Youth

By ag e fourtee n Bet h Twiggar , growin g u p i n Ossining , Ne w York , be gan writin g diar y entrie s tha t sh e believe d woul d shoc k he r middle-clas s parents. Fo r instance , i n Februar y 192 8 sh e wrote , "I n bed , wit h col d cream smeare d al l ove r my face , nonchalantl y smokin g a cigarette. " Later i n th e sam e entr y sh e aske d whethe r he r recen t excursion s int o smoking, necking , an d drinkin g showe d tha t sh e wa s downgradin g o r upgrading an d the n added , "Gosh , I like t o thin k I' m a devil , don' t I? " Her questio n gav e he r a wa y o f pokin g fu n a t th e cynica l an d sophisti cated air s sh e enjoyed describin g i n he r diary . Beth' s airs , along with he r adolescent experiment s wit h cigarette s an d boys , allowed he r t o explor e the emotiona l an d interpersona l style s o f he r moder n contemporaries . Her dentis t father , thre e time s th e mayo r o f thei r town , an d home maker mothe r seeme d t o Bet h t o b e ou t o f touc h wit h th e urge s tha t stirred her . Sh e kne w tha t he r parent s an d olde r sister s love d her , bu t doubted tha t the y like d her , an d concede d tha t sh e ofte n acte d badl y toward them . Bet h regrette d hurtin g them , especiall y he r "long-sufferin g adorable" mother , bu t couldn' t accep t th e lif e the y led . " I can' t hel p it, " she wrote , " I wan t t o d o thing s an d b e things sh e [mother ] can' t under stand. I wan t t o b e moder n an d whicke d [sic] and sophisticated. " Bet h didn't en d he r entr y befor e dryl y pokin g fu n a t bot h hersel f an d he r family: "S o I guess I'm prett y awful . Shal l I commit suicide?" 1 In th e decad e followin g Worl d Wa r I many adolescent s embrace d th e identity o f "flamin g youth. " Th e best-sellin g nove l tha t popularize d tha t label offere d a compendiu m o f youthfu l assault s o n Victoria n morality , including ope n drinkin g an d clandestin e sexua l experimentation . Th e 17

18 Flaming

Youth

novel's author , Warne r Fabian , succinctl y describe d "th e philosoph y o f the flapper:" "Dutie s coul d wait . Pleasur e wa s somethin g yo u ha d t o grab befor e i t go t awa y fro m you. " Flaming Youth an d othe r work s o f the 1920 s introduce d American s t o a yout h cultur e tha t ha d largel y abandoned th e moral imperative s o f nineteenth-century middle-clas s culture. 2 Sensua l stimulatio n an d immediat e gratification , s o importan t t o the mas s medi a an d th e departmen t store s o f th e period , provide d a backdrop fo r th e sexua l independenc e o f middle-clas s youth . Most o f th e youn g wome n i n thi s chapte r wer e stil l hig h schoo l stu dents, although flaming yout h o f the 1920 s included college students an d some workin g youn g adults . The y ha d i n commo n thei r interes t i n so cializing an d ha d ye t t o tur n t o th e adul t concern s o f marriag e an d career. Fo r adolescen t girl s lik e Bet h Twiggar , pee r relation s becam e more importan t tha n famil y o r churc h i n providin g possibilitie s fo r self discovery, status , an d play . Ou t o f thes e pee r relations , youn g wome n shaped a distinctiv e emotiona l style . Within th e heterosexua l datin g system, youn g wome n sough t th e skill s o f socia l performanc e tha t woul d make the m attractiv e t o boy s an d successfu l amon g thei r peers . Th e possibility o f failure , however , alway s threatene d self-esteem . A gir l might fai l t o becom e popula r o r b e humiliated b y trying too har d t o wi n attention. I n addition , sh e woul d almos t inevitabl y experienc e conflic t between th e Victoria n mora l standard s o f he r parent s an d th e moder n demands fo r pee r conformity . Bet h self-consciousl y recognize d thi s con flict. Althoug h he r privat e musing s endorse d th e value s o f he r peers — little patienc e wit h adul t values , desir e fo r consume r goods , an d abov e all, striving fo r popularit y wit h boy s and girls—sh e ofte n foun d he r pee r culture an d it s emotional style limite d o r uncomfortable . Tw o day s afte r asking idl y i f sh e shoul d commi t suicide , Bet h ha d a spel l o f optimis m and happiness : "I t i s such a pretty, breezy , vital worl d tha t i t gives me a clutchy feelin g i n my—well , t o b e Victorian—in m y heart!" 3 He r occa sional nostalgi a fo r Victoria n feeling s showe d Bet h tha t sh e live d i n a period o f transition . Whereas th e pee r cultur e o f th e earl y twentiet h centur y mad e hetero sexual socializin g centra l t o adolescence , youn g wome n als o foun d pas sionate friendship s wit h othe r girl s and wit h olde r women. These crushes often too k o n th e characteristic s o f ido l worshi p o f teacher s o r olde r girls. A t times , youn g women' s relation s wit h othe r wome n coul d be come mutua l an d spirituall y an d physicall y satisfying . Withi n thes e rela tionships, wome n explore d self-understanding s tha t departe d fro m th e

Flaming Youth 1

9

peer cultur e o f socia l performanc e an d personality . Women' s experienc e of intimac y wit h othe r wome n allowe d the m t o shap e selve s apar t fro m the pattern s o f th e consume r cultur e an d th e pee r group . The Peer Culture During th e nineteent h century , America n yout h typicall y reproduce d th e gender role s o f adults . Girl s forme d powerfu l bond s wit h thei r mother s and wit h othe r femal e relative s an d friend s tha t woul d las t throughou t their lives . Education wa s sex segregated, with women studyin g at femal e academies, finishing schools , an d a t th e earl y college s fo r women . Boy s grew u p i n th e sam e household s a s thei r sisters , bu t the y als o entere d sex-segregated school s o r wen t t o wor k i n thei r adolescen t years . Girl s and boy s alik e worke d an d playe d wit h adult s an d withi n context s cre ated b y mothers , fathers , bosses , an d othe r adul t authorities . Th e gen dered sphere s o f America n middle-clas s yout h merge d onl y temporarily , and the n onl y as youth prepare d fo r adul t responsibilities. When a young man becam e intereste d i n a youn g woman , h e calle d o n he r a t home . If she prove d receptiv e an d th e famil y approved , th e youn g coupl e woul d be give n enoug h privac y t o becom e acquainte d and , ove r time , t o buil d a foundatio n o f passionat e desir e for th e commitmen t o f marriage. 4 As th e nineteent h centur y dre w t o a close , a distinctiv e yout h cultur e began t o emerg e withi n th e America n middl e class . I t wa s th e hig h school, the "colleg e o f th e people, " ofte n modele d o n America n college s but availabl e t o man y mor e America n adolescents , tha t woul d becom e the agor a o f America n yout h culture . B y th e earl y twentiet h century , child labo r law s force d man y teen-age d childre n ou t o f th e workplace , and compulsor y educatio n law s force d other s int o school . Eve n earlier , high schoo l educatio n ha d begu n t o replac e low-leve l wor k experienc e as the mos t importan t preparatio n fo r manageria l position s i n America n businesses. A t leas t som e hig h schoo l attendanc e becam e norma l fo r white yout h b y the lat e 1920s. 5 In hig h schoo l youn g middle-clas s wome n adopte d th e custom s an d styles tha t characterize d th e yout h culture . Adel e Siegel , wh o attende d high schoo l o n State n Islan d i n th e lat e 1920s , foun d th e socia l sid e o f high schoo l fa r mor e absorbin g tha n th e academic . "I' m terribl y laz y when i t come s t o schoo l wor k practicin g an d housework , bu t I' m aw fully energeti c when i t comes t o Woodcraft , playin g basketball , going t o parties an d doin g thing s tha t ar e fun. " "Thing s tha t ar e fun " include d

2o Flaming

Youth

clubs, dances , an d sportin g events , th e "extracurriculum " tha t taugh t students bot h th e ritual s an d value s o f th e pee r group. 6 I n thes e socia l activities adolescent s sough t statu s an d self-wort h throug h th e approva l of peers . The extr a curriculu m encourage d boy s an d girl s t o mi x socially . B y the 1920s , America n adolescent s an d youn g adult s ha d accepte d an d elaborated a se t o f value s aroun d heterosexua l sociabilit y tha t sharpl y distinguished the m fro m th e middle-clas s yout h o f a generatio n earlier . Like th e advertisement s fo r th e movi e o f Flaming Youth tha t titillate d prospective viewer s wit h promise s o f re d an d whit e kisses , heterosexua l excess ofte n appeare d i n th e popula r cultur e o f th e 1920 s a s the cor e o f youth culture . Hig h schoo l sponsore d activities , amusemen t parks , an d local sportin g event s allowe d teen-ager s t o defin e distinctiv e role s fo r themselves. A s mor e an d mor e youn g me n an d wome n entere d college , an eve n mor e ambiguou s stag e o f developmen t becam e common: adults , still largel y dependen t o n famil y resources , withou t full-tim e employ ment, prepare d fo r role s i n th e rapidl y expandin g econom y b y studyin g the libera l arts . High schoo l graduates , whether the y went t o work o r t o college, mad e hig h schoo l custom s an d practice s normativ e fo r adul t recreation an d courtshi p i n the Unite d States. 7 The ne w direction s take n b y hig h schoo l an d colleg e student s durin g the 1920 s coul d see m strang e an d eve n dangerou s t o th e olde r genera tion. Th e generatio n bor n afte r 190 0 ha d noticeabl y mor e difficul t rela tions wit h parents , especiall y betwee n mother s an d daughters . "Eac h group think s th e othe r cruel , heartles s an d unfeeling, " wrot e Miria m Van Waters , the n superintenden t o f th e Lo s Angele s Count y juvenil e home. Va n Water s believe d tha t a t hom e mos t youn g wome n foun d boredom, indifferen t parents , vagu e tal k abou t moral s an d "bein g good." Outsid e th e home , however , everythin g seeme d "smiling , gay , changing, n o disapprovals , motio n an d rhyth m i n dance-hall s an d swif t cars; unhear d o f intimacy " an d th e "vagu e awarenes s tha t thoug h on e may b e 'bad ' th e adult s wh o 'liv e this way ' ar e contente d an d seemingl y rewarded, a t leas t in movies an d magazines." 8 Michael V. O'Shea, edito r of a serie s o f book s o n youth , frette d tha t "th e nervou s syste m i s fre quently s o disturbe d a t adolescenc e tha t insanit y results." 9 Adolescent s seemed constantl y o n th e mov e i n their searc h fo r pleasure . By the 1920 s youn g wome n too k fo r grante d th e newnes s an d sepa rateness o f yout h culture . Youn g wome n migh t ech o th e expert s an d moralists worryin g ove r "spee d craze d youth " livin g t o "fin d a thrill, "

Flaming Youth 2

1

but th e sens e o f newness , o f a brea k wit h th e past , ofte n struc k yout h i n the 1920 s as a promise o f improvement. "I' m gla d I'm livin g in this age," one colleg e studen t wrote , "peopl e ar e beginnin g t o wak e up." 10 A hig h school student i n rural North Dakot a affirme d he r freedom fro m custom : "Here al l wome n pas t fort y wea r blac k dresse s fo r best . Whe n I get t o be forty I'l l wear a pink dres s if I want to and neve r mind i f the neighbor s think I am tryin g to b e young an d frivolous." 11 A medical residen t i n the east reflecte d o n th e change s sinc e Worl d Wa r I . " I ca n thin k & act ; perceive & execute , reason & reac t i n a thousand differen t way s that m y grandmother & eve n m y mothe r neve r could. " Harrie t Louis e Hard y wondered abou t th e ambivalen t promis e o f thi s ne w freedom , althoug h she felt, "W e d o no t nee d inhibitions , i t is right t o heav e the m away." 12 Denver juvenile court Judge Ben Lindsey recognized th e economic an d technological change s tha t underla y th e "revol t o f youth " i n socia l an d personal matters . "Thirty , fort y year s ago , yout h couldn' t hav e flun g such a challeng e wit h th e leas t hop e o f success . Today , th e da y o f th e automobile, the telephone, speed, good wages , and a n unhear d o f degre e of economi c independenc e fo r everybody , i t can." Alon g wit h ne w tech nology, ne w pattern s o f consumptio n aros e wit h th e mas s marke t econ omy o f th e earl y twentiet h century . Th e yout h o f th e century' s earl y decades, les s assimilate d t o th e Victoria n value s o f thrif t an d impresse d by th e advertisin g o f th e er a tha t glamorize d youthfulnes s an d newness , attained fa r greate r expertis e i n consumption , an d i n choosin g amon g marginally differen t products , than thei r parents. 13 Fads an d craze s gav e middle-clas s adolescent s opportunit y t o explor e the emotiona l satisfaction s o f commoditie s an d t o refin e an d displa y their "wisdom " i n commodit y selectio n an d als o t o distinguis h them selves fro m adult s b y th e clothe s an d possession s the y displayed . Pear l Buck, wh o gre w u p wit h he r missionar y parent s i n China , returnin g t o the Unite d State s t o atten d Randolp h Maco n Woman' s College , wante d to "belon g t o m y ow n kind." 14 Sh e quickly learne d tha t t o fit in sh e ha d to "lear n t o tal k abou t th e things tha t America n girl s talked about , boy s and dance s an d sororitie s an d s o on." "A t DePauw , i n 1919, " Margare t Mead recalled , " I foun d student s wh o were , fo r th e mos t part , th e first generation t o g o t o colleg e an d whos e parent s appeare d a t Clas s Da y poorly dresse d whil e thei r daughter s wor e th e raccoo n o r muskra t coat s that wer e appropriat e t o th e sororit y the y ha d made." 15 A Broadwa y actress recalle d th e disaster s sh e endured whe n he r mothe r ha d he r dres s in Vogue-like fashion s fo r teen-ag e dances : "Young peopl e wan t t o loo k

22 Flaming

Youth

like pea s i n a pod , an d ther e i s no us e tryin g t o mak e the m different." 16 Beliefs an d ideas , lik e materia l culture , als o shifte d wit h eac h passin g fad. I n th e earl y 1930s , a graduat e studen t a t th e Universit y o f Nort h Carolina though t he r dormitor y companion s al l prett y muc h inter changeable: " y ° u could unscre w al l these heads and scre w them on agai n to othe r bodie s withou t gettin g an y differenc e i n conversation , outloo k or personality." 17 Heterosexual Conviviality and the Sexual Revolution In hig h schools , coeducationa l colleges , an d th e workplace , youn g me n and wome n ha d fa r mor e contac t wit h on e anothe r b y th e 1920 s tha n had bee n tru e i n th e nineteent h century . Thi s provide d th e contex t fo r the ne w socializin g practice s o f th e er a an d helpe d accoun t fo r th e de cline i n th e media n ag e o f marriage. 18 Althoug h outlandis h clothin g an d illegal alcoho l us e adde d t o th e rac y reputatio n o f flamin g youth , i t wa s far mor e th e ne w socia l an d sexua l freedo m o f young peopl e tha t se t th e postwar generatio n apart . Souther n write r Carolin e Gordon , wh o hap pily reported i n her letter s when sh e found a better qualit y o f liquor, ha d a muc h differen t respons e t o " a madca p virgi n fro m Greenwic h Village " who staye d wit h he r an d he r husban d Alle n Tat e i n 1926 . " I fea r I us e the word virgi n loosely . . . . This child i s an unedifyin g spectacl e of wha t may happe n t o youn g peopl e thes e days ! Sh e begin s t o twitc h i f th e conversation stray s fro m se x a moment, an d suddenl y bega n t o boas t i n the mids t o f dinne r las t nigh t o f he r prowes s i n birt h contro l b y muscl e contraction—a metho d sh e say s sh e learne d fro m som e Hindus. " An other southerner , Emil y Tapscott Clark , onl y 30 , attended " a ver y young party" wher e sh e wa s surprise d t o lear n ho w muc h youn g peopl e ha d changed. "Th e masculin e method s ar e especiall y startling . The y don' t stop fo r amenitie s o f an y kind." 19 Dorothy Smith , a Midwesterne r wit h what sh e referre d t o a s Purita n ancestry , travele d t o Pari s t o stud y wit h Nadia Boulange r i n 1926 . Sh e foun d hersel f "wit h youn g peopl e wh o drank a lot & tol d vulga r storie s with relish." 20 O n he r trip to the Orien t with th e Denishaw n Dancers , an d unde r th e watchfu l ey e o f Rut h St . Denis, Jane Sherman , a teen-ager fro m Ne w York , foun d hersel f fendin g off advance s fro m America n o r Englis h expatriate s i n virtually ever y city she visite d an d discussin g se x wit h he r fello w dancer s i n thei r humbl e quarters. 21 Although discussio n o f a sexua l revolutio n generall y refer s t o thos e

Flaming Youth 2

3

who too k advantag e o f ne w courtshi p o r marriag e practices , even youn g women wh o too k n o par t i n datin g understoo d an d experience d th e changes i n heterosexualit y b y th e lat e 1920s . Rut h Raymond , wh o wa s 20 i n 1929 , kep t discoverin g se x everywher e i n he r hometown , Lexing ton, Massachusetts . A t a movi e sh e move d onc e fro m he r sea t t o avoi d "a shabb y youn g man " wh o kep t flirtin g wit h he r an d onl y rid hersel f o f his attention s b y speakin g coldl y t o him . Sh e accepte d withou t questio n a second-han d repor t tha t man y o f th e girl s i n th e loca l hig h schoo l ha d become pregnant . A t a loca l basebal l gam e sh e overhear d girl s talkin g about th e loca l team' s player s i n intimat e term s an d discussin g wh o various member s o f th e tea m ha d se x with. 22 Like Rut h Raymond , wh o pride d hersel f o n he r worldl y wisdom , many youn g wome n preferre d lif e withou t Victoria n euphemism . Mar tha Lavell , a colleg e studen t i n th e Midwest , proudl y reporte d tha t he r psychology professo r congratulate d th e generatio n o f th e 1920 s fo r it s willingness "t o fac e th e facts. " Lavel l reflecte d o n jus t ho w fa r sh e ha d come hersel f i n he r knowledg e o f sex , fro m learnin g o f "th e man' s par t in procreation " durin g he r sophomor e yea r i n colleg e t o studyin g psy choanalysis i n graduat e school. 23 Elizabet h Yates , onl y fourteen , re corded he r embarrassmen t whe n he r mothe r attempte d t o explai n th e physical change s tha t woul d accompan y menarche . A boo k o n What Every Young Girl Should Know di d nothin g t o reliev e he r ignorance — in fac t sh e hate d th e "prissy " style tha t sai d nothing . Sh e finally ha d a straight tal k wit h a frien d wh o mad e he r realiz e tha t menstruatio n di d not mea n sh e woul d neve r b e tal l enoug h t o pla y cente r i n basketball . Jane Sherma n assure d he r mothe r tha t th e tal k amon g th e Denishaw n Dancers wa s "NO T DIRTY , jus t instructiv e abou t th e thing s w e reall y ought t o know, " includin g birt h contro l an d syphilis. 24 Of course , discussion o f se x did no t alway s mean an y gain i n accurat e knowledge. Margare t Mea d an d he r housemate s a t Barnar d Colleg e compiled a five-page lis t o f "hom e remedies " fo r pregnanc y fo r th e ben efit o f a sixteen-year-ol d daughte r o f a friend , wh o nevertheles s becam e pregnant. Glady s Bel l ha d onl y a sketchy , an d apparentl y inaccurate , knowledge o f birt h contro l whe n sh e marrie d i n 1925 . Rut h Raymon d recorded a questio n fro m a "swee t youn g thing " i n a clas s wher e th e professor ha d jus t discusse d se x hygiene . " 'Jus t what, ' sh e asked , 'd o you mea n b y "intercourse " and doe s i t have t o b e physical?' " 25 The combinatio n o f curiosity , naivete , an d confidenc e i n explorin g heterosexual relation s displaye d b y youn g wome n i n th e 1920 s seeme d

24 Flaming

Youth

explosive t o contemporaries . On e prominen t sociologis t recognize d tha t although th e ne w sexua l more s o f th e machine ag e could confus e me n a s thoroughly a s women , th e "unres t i s fel t mos t b y thos e wh o hav e heretofore bee n mos t exclude d fro m genera l participatio n i n life,—th e mature woma n an d th e young girl." 26 The vamps an d gol d digger s of th e period, alon g wit h th e knowin g gir l nex t door , reveale d a les s inhibite d sexuality tha n American s woul d hav e foun d amon g middle-clas s yout h in an earlier generation. "Girl s displa y their bodie s with a n abandon tha t would hav e mad e th e mos t hardene d woma n blus h fifty year s ago, " opined advic e columnist Doroth y Dix . "Youn g women thin k n o more of kissing ever y Tom , Dic k an d Harr y wh o come s alon g an d i n indulgin g in pettin g partie s an d 'necking, ' tha n thei r mother s woul d hav e though t of shakin g hand s an d holdin g a casua l conversation. " Biochemis t Loui s Berman blame d th e excessiv e pituitar y irritation s o f th e post-191 4 er a for turnin g what migh t have bee n a "nic e sedate" girl into an "adventur ous neve r satiate d avi d pleasur e hunter , i n who m th e cravin g fo r stimu lation wil l sto p a t nothing." 27 The heterosexua l exces s o f thei r contemporarie s cam e hom e t o indi vidual wome n i n mor e direc t way s tha n th e sweepin g judgment s o f ex perts an d socia l critics . Martha Lavell' s siste r tol d he r tha t "everyon e a t school . . . puts o n lipstic k an d roug e an d smoke s an d 'pets ' an d every thing." 28 Jessamy n West , successfull y fendin g of f flirtatiou s me n i n En gland an d France , worried abou t he r husband attendin g schoo l that sum mer i n Berkeley , "gettin g ( I hope) hi s ow n meal s bu t subjec t t o the wile s of on e thousand beautifu l an d unscrupulou s coeds." 29 The heterosocialit y o f th e postwa r er a gre w ou t o f a t leas t tw o de cades o f yout h cultur e tha t encourage d youn g wome n an d me n t o so cialize wit h man y member s o f th e opposit e se x an d t o explor e physica l intimacy wit h thei r partners . Datin g an d th e "conspicuou s heterosexu ality" o f working-clas s wome n ha d arouse d th e concern s o f progressiv e social scientist s b y th e tur n o f th e century . B y 1920 , middle-clas s yout h had adopte d muc h th e sam e styl e o f socializing . Within a decad e datin g was widespread , eve n i n rural areas , with a s many a s half o f high schoo l freshmen an d th e larg e majorit y o f senior s dating. 30 The datin g syste m tha t becam e commo n b y th e 1920 s bega n i n th e high schoo l extracurricula r activitie s o f th e 1890s , wher e middle-clas s adolescents forme d socia l tie s wit h man y o f thei r contemporarie s an d took a n interes t (o r a t leas t fel t the y shoul d tak e a n interest ) i n the othe r sex. Halli e Ferguson , bor n i n 1889 , recalle d " 'goin g with ' severa l boy s

Flaming Youth 2

5

to ou r grou p activities. " Sh e an d th e othe r girl s i n he r hig h schoo l clas s discussed boy s "endlessly , chiefly o n the great problem o f whether o r no t we should allo w them to take our ar m when the y took u s home." 31 Clar a Savage, a hig h schoo l sophomor e i n 1907 , spen t tim e wit h he r peer s studying, puttin g o n plays , playin g basketball , performin g music , an d going t o dances . Sh e ha d guilt y enjoymen t fro m som e o f he r mal e friends' flirtations , althoug h generall y sh e expresse d he r mos t arden t en counters i n limite d detail : "H e showe d m e h e like d m e awfull y well . I said ' I ha d a beautifu l walk. ' 'S o di d I & than k yo u fo r th e privilege! ' See! See! Well I like it." 32 By th e first decad e o f th e century , middle-clas s wome n expecte d t o socialize wit h man y youn g men ; thes e woul d includ e som e intimat e ac quaintances an d prospectiv e spouses . Havin g a wide r rang e o f acquain tance woul d allo w a youn g woma n t o recogniz e th e wort h o f th e ma n she hope d t o marry , "th e one. " "Cha p books " wer e availabl e whic h allowed wome n t o organiz e th e lis t o f me n the y kne w an d t o recor d other information , includin g th e plac e an d dat e o f meetin g an d als o opinions o f th e men . Dori s Stevens' s cha p boo k include d entrie s a s early as 1905 , when sh e wa s stil l i n hig h school . Mos t o f th e "chaps " appea r to hav e bee n student s a t Oberli n College , althoug h sh e als o me t man y young me n a t dance s o r reception s i n th e home s o f friends . Th e tota l number o f chap s wa s 109 . Sh e gav e he r opinio n o n forty-on e o f th e total. Sh e include d a variet y o f judgment s abou t dress , conversation , dancing abilities , looks , an d character . Sh e found bot h outwar d appear ances an d finer qualitie s attractiv e i n differen t men . O f on e sh e wrote , "Never wa s ther e a ma n wit h mor e tru e manlihood— very courteous " (Ross Wiley). Of another , "Fascinating—goo d dresser—goo d bearing — swell dancer—not a spooner" (Harr y C . Biddle). Her mentio n o f spoon ing suggest s tha t middle-clas s me n ha d adjuste d t o th e ne w courtshi p style wit h socia l grace s intende d t o advanc e intimac y a s fa r a s i t woul d go (althoug h no t ver y far ) wit h a variet y o f youn g women . Severa l o f Doris Stevens' s chap s seeme d t o tak e thi s approach : "Fon d o f coz y corners—much bi g spoon fon d o f feminin e sex " (Fre d Elliott). 33 As a studen t a t Oberlin , i n 1908 , Stevens's socia l lif e include d severa l young men . Sh e spen t mos t o f he r recreationa l tim e wit h Russell , prob ably th e sam e Russel l P . Jameson tha t sh e mentione d i n he r cha p book . Doris an d Russel l too k walk s (sometime s t o fire hi s revolver) , playe d bridge, an d attende d schoo l event s together . Steven s offer s n o hin t o f physical intimacy , excep t a walk o f hal f a n hou r tha t sh e annotated wit h

z6 Flaming

Youth

" ' 2 volumes ' &C . " O n occasio n th e coupl e quarrele d an d mad e up , usually wit h present s an d apologie s comin g fro m Russell . Ye t th e ro mance seem s to hav e lasted onl y for th e school term . When Steven s went home fo r th e summer , reference s t o Russel l disappeared. 34 Even i f socializin g wit h man y youn g me n ha d becom e commo n fo r women b y th e secon d decad e o f th e centur y an d physica l intimac y ha d become mor e casual , prewa r middle-clas s yout h stil l seeme d restraine d when compare d wit h postwa r adolescents . Malcol m Cowle y remem bered tha t a t hi s hig h schoo l i n Pittsburg h befor e th e war , "Pettin g wa s not ye t fashionable : i t wa s calle d 'lovin g up ' an d wa s permitte d onl y b y unattractive girl s wh o ha d t o offe r specia l inducements. " On e youn g woman recalle d tha t he r futur e husban d wa s th e first "mal e perso n wh o was eve r allowe d a t m y hom e i n th e evening." 35 By th e war , respectabl e behavio r ha d change d eve n fo r middle-clas s women. Marjori e Kinnan' s mothe r aske d th e landlor d wher e wome n received mal e caller s i n th e crampe d Ne w Yor k apartmen t hous e tha t her daughte r wa s contemplatin g renting . "Oh , righ t i n thei r rooms . It' s considered perfectl y proper . . . . And o f course , tho' I try t o loo k ou t fo r my girls , I expect the m t o b e able to tak e car e o f themselves." 36 By 191 9 Michael V . O'She a hope d tha t parent s an d administrator s coul d arrang e high schoo l activitie s s o tha t teen s woul d g o hom e directl y afterward : "There shoul d b e n o loitering , n o visiting , n o ice-crea m parlors , n o jo y riding, no strolling. " Bu t ther e was , of course , all that an d more . Glady s Bell's diary open s i n 191 9 (sh e was eighteen ) wit h a report o f a midnigh t picnic o n Augus t 8 , a dat e o n Augus t 9 , a jo y rid e o n Augus t 14 , an d the first repor t o f stayin g hom e o n Augus t 16. 37 The kin d o f heterosexual recreatio n tha t Glady s Bel l described s o fre quently i n he r diarie s ha d assume d a for m b y 191 9 tha t woul d remai n consistent throughou t th e 1920 s an d 1930s . Boy s o r youn g me n aske d for th e company o f a girl o r young woma n t o som e public amusement — dance, movie , party , o r othe r socia l event . The y wen t withou t adul t supervision o r interference . Th e mal e membe r o f th e coupl e pai d an d frequently i n th e 1920 s provide d transportation . Afte r th e mai n event , the coupl e ofte n wen t ou t t o ea t an d frequentl y woul d tr y t o find som e private plac e fo r necking . Wherea s physica l intimac y becam e a n ex pected elemen t o f dating , th e limit s o n sexua l experienc e depende d o n the gir l an d t o a larg e exten t o n he r class . Middle-class wome n typicall y placed greate r limit s o n thei r physica l freedo m wit h mal e peer s tha n working-class wome n did. 38

Flaming Youth 2

7

Class also shaped th e choice o f how th e couple spen t their time. Dates could b e expensive , leadin g eve n middle-clas s youn g me n t o complain . Working-class couple s stil l rubbe d shoulder s wit h middle-clas s couple s at amusemen t parks , bu t non e o f th e diarist s i n thi s stud y mentio n Coney Island , Kennywood , o r othe r popula r park s o f th e period. 39 Dancing prove d t o hav e greate r appea l acros s clas s lines . B y 1911 , open-admission dance s i n Ne w Yor k sparke d a nationwid e craz e tha t lasted years . Moralist s condemne d dancing , recognizing , alon g wit h everyone else , the eroti c possibilitie s brough t ont o th e danc e floor . Eve n so, dancin g i n som e form—whethe r th e jazz-drive n writhin g tha t lon e Robinson discovere d i n Pari s o r th e sedat e ballroo m dance s wit h German partner s an d well-tutore d protoco l tha t uppe r middle-clas s girl s learned—assumed a centra l importanc e i n th e socia l live s o f mos t o f these middle-clas s women. 40 A t he r sister' s coming-ou t party , Elizabet h Yates dance d wit h a bo y a n inc h shorte r tha n sh e wh o whispere d tha t he planne d t o marr y her . " I coul d hav e slappe d him! " sh e wrot e i n he r diary. Doroth y Smith , bac k hom e i n Chicag o fro m college , wen t t o a dance a t th e loca l hig h schoo l wit h a young ma n an d anothe r couple . "I t was fun—bot h wer e goo d dancer s &c I felt lik e dancing. " State n Islan d high schoo l studen t Adel e Siege l recorde d a part y a s "th e bes t yet . . . . I danced unti l I almost dropped. " An n Mari e Low , in rural Nort h Dakot a in th e mids t o f th e Depression , attende d dance s wit h variou s admirers. 41 Movies woul d hav e edge d ou t dance s a s th e mos t popula r excus e fo r dates excep t tha t youn g wome n ofte n wen t t o se e films alon e o r wit h other women . Eve n so , movi e theater s remaine d popula r dat e destina tions, givin g th e coupl e a modicu m o f privac y an d relievin g the m o f th e duty t o mak e conversation . A t leas t som e teen-age d boy s too k date s t o movies t o pu t the m i n th e moo d fo r petting . Moralist s deplored , agai n without effect , th e movi e habit. 42 Whereas car s ha d onl y mino r importanc e fo r high-school-age d cou ples, th e importanc e o f th e automobil e increase d wit h th e ag e o f th e couple. Jan e Sherman , onl y barel y ou t o f hig h schoo l an d travelin g i n the Fa r Eas t a s a membe r o f th e Denishaw n Dancers , recorde d drive s with a youn g rubbe r baro n i n Singapor e a s thei r mai n recreation . Sh e recalled th e sound s an d smell s tha t surrounde d he r a s sh e rod e ou t t o watch th e moo n ris e an d bac k throug h th e jungle . "Al l th e backgroun d for a romanti c episod e whic h threatene d bu t di d no t com e off!" 43 Isa belle McNelis , a ban k cler k i n rura l wester n Pennsylvania , struggle d t o resolve th e questio n o f whethe r t o marr y Harr y Sickle r o r not . Sh e

28 Flaming

Youth

sketched one of their dates in her "line-a-day" diary: "Thur—Nice Out — Down t o Ban d Concer t a t 8:0 0 Harr y & I trying t o arrang e ou r futur e Up th e Mountai n t o tal k thing s over . I can't decid e what t o do." 44 Afte r a danc e wit h a youn g ma n an d anothe r couple , Doroth y Smit h an d he r friends wen t i n searc h o f refreshment . "W e buzze d ove r t o Natic k fo r a hot do g & nearl y rattle d th e poo r For d t o death." 45 Although car s gav e couple s opportunitie s t o b e alone , the exampl e o f Dorothy Smit h remind s u s tha t date s too k plac e i n a contex t o f mor e general socializing . I f th e coupl e remove d themselve s fro m thei r peers , it was onl y temporarily . I n a large r sens e the y neve r lef t th e wide r group . Often th e lin e betwee n th e coupl e an d th e large r pee r grou p blurred . Edythe Weine r wen t t o th e movi e Alias Jimmy Valentine wit h a grou p of femal e friends . "Everybody wa s there," sh e wrote. After th e sho w sh e and he r friend s wen t t o th e Commodor e fo r sodas . "Yo u mee t everyon e you kno w there . In fact , ther e ar e alway s a bunc h o f schoo l kid s there. " Edythe als o ha d smal l partie s o f friend s t o he r house . On e evenin g a group o f girl s gathere d ther e t o danc e an d smok e cigarette s (he r parent s apparently di d no t notice ) an d the n use d he r phon e t o cal l boys . Edyth e considered he r girlfrien d grou p th e bas e fro m whic h sh e woul d gai n attention fro m boys—"i f onl y I were i n wit h a popula r crow d o f girls , it woul d hel p loads , I know." 46 Datin g couple s frequentl y joine d othe r couples fo r grou p parties , an d partie s gav e boy s an d girl s opportunitie s to becom e acquainte d befor e th e more seriou s socia l ac t of dating . Adele Siegel's crow d o n Lon g Islan d mad e a part y o f playin g bridge , dancing , eating ic e crea m an d cake , an d talkin g unti l one . Anothe r evenin g sh e used a strin g o f exclamatio n point s an d othe r emphati c marking s t o show he r excitement . "Wha t a ho t tim e w e had!! ! W e san g 'Lov e Son g [sic] th e Whole Worl d Sings ' right throug h fro m cove r t o cover." 47 Although hig h schoo l datin g migh t loo k like—o r eve n tur n into — courtship, it s mor e typica l rol e wa s t o establis h socia l statu s withi n th e peer grou p an d t o provid e youn g wome n wit h a mean s o f self understanding. Edyth e Weine r repeatedl y mentione d he r attachmen t t o Jimmie Daviso n i n he r hig h schoo l diary . "Oh , diary , he' s s o gorgeousll I ador e him . . . . I f I shoul d eve r mak e him—Whoopee! " Tw o week s later, with n o los s of adoratio n fo r Jimmie, she developed a crush o n th e star basketbal l playe r durin g a n ice-skatin g outing . Sh e reflecte d o n th e quality an d sourc e o f he r feeling s afte r discussin g he r ne w infatuatio n with a grou p o f friend s an d notin g tha t anothe r girl , a n admire r o f th e same boy , took specia l notic e o f Edythe' s account . " I seldo m ge t a crus h

Flaming Youth 2

9

on a bo y unles s som e othe r gir l ha s a crush o n him . Then I first begi n t o notice him , an d find hidde n beaut y i n him. " Crushe s an d othe r thrillin g feelings neve r meant that Edyth e planned t o commit hersel f t o these boys for mor e tha n th e lengt h o f a fe w dates . A t fourtee n sh e longe d fo r th e acceptance that a n attentiv e bo y could giv e her with othe r boy s and girls. Such acceptanc e woul d mak e he r mor e popula r an d allo w he r t o fee l better abou t herself . I n th e calculu s o f th e hig h schoo l socia l system , more date s mean t mor e popularit y an d vic e versa . "Oh , I wan t lot s o f dates," Edyth e pine d afte r returnin g fro m a Gle e Clu b concer t withou t an escort . " I wan t t o b e popular— I wan t t o b e loved . Oh , God ! Oh , God! I' m i n lov e with Love , and th e feelin g isn' t mutual , I guess." 48 The succes s of a date depende d o n bot h persona l an d pee r judgments . The opinion s o f friend s coul d shap e a woman' s reactio n t o he r con quests. Rut h Raymon d wa s gla d t o repor t tha t he r preparation s fo r a group religiou s discussion—spendin g th e mornin g polishin g he r nails — worked. Sh e me t a youn g ma n wh o ha d aske d t o call . Th e nex t day , though, sh e discovere d fro m dormmate s tha t h e wa s merel y " 'a n affec tionate puppy ' " wh o ha d calle d o n severa l girl s already . Raymon d ha d no more tim e for he r prize. 49 Whatever th e satisfactions o f male compan ionship fo r girl s and youn g women , the y were generally s o thin that the y offered n o protectio n fro m th e coolnes s o f one' s friends . Sometimes , there wa s n o satisfactio n t o b e disapprove d of . Doroth y Smit h spen t much o f a summe r da y wit h a youn g ma n wh o too k he r t o tenni s an d later swa m wit h her . "Fo r a n Englis h teache r & Dramati c coac h h e i s a stupid talker . . . . I don't car e i f I never se e him again." 50 Ann e Morro w tired o f th e colleg e me n wh o too k he r ou t ever y weekend : "Nice , good natured, agreeable , mediocre , platitudinal. " Sh e obviousl y fel t som e re lief i n describin g on e o f he r escorts : "H e i s a mas s o f conventions—hi s talk, hi s "ideas, hi s clothes , hi s car . W e wen t t o a conventiona l movi e where a conventionall y prett y gir l wen t throug h th e convention s o f se x appeal an d love . Hideous." 51 If Anne Morrow, wh o ha d man y dates , could find th e ritual s o trying, imagine the danger s fo r a girl o n he r first dat e with a young ma n sh e ha s never met . Mario n Taylo r wa s excite d a t th e prospec t o f he r first dat e which a forme r teache r ha d arranged . Th e strin g o f disaster s sh e de scribed migh t hav e provide d a silen t movi e scenario . He r date , appar ently trying t o mee t socia l protoco l learne d fro m a n etiquett e book , star tled Mario n whe n h e "sprang " t o hel p he r o n wit h he r cloak . A s the y strolled, "h e edge d aroun d fo r th e outsid e o f th e sidewalk , an d I forgo t

30 Flaming

Youth

that th e gentlema n i s suppose d t o d o tha t an d I nearly knocke d hi m of f because I starte d t o wal k o n th e outsid e too. " Crossin g th e street , h e clamped a "vise-lik e grip " o n he r ar m an d seeme d t o shov e he r along . Unsurprisingly, the y had nothin g t o talk about . When h e took he r home , she just wanted t o escape although he r escort seemed to expect a farewel l embrace. " I mad e variou s lam e remark s an d ther e wer e severa l harrow ing pauses." 52 Dating gav e youn g me n an d wome n opportunitie s t o becom e accus tomed t o member s o f th e opposit e sex . Marth a Lavell , wh o vowe d i n her diar y tha t sh e would neve r allo w a ma n t o tak e he r ou t an d pa y he r way, understoo d th e strangenes s th e gender s hel d fo r on e another . Re gretting tha t sh e coul d no t wea r trouser s an d shorte r hair , sh e reflected , "If I were a man , i t seem s t o m e tha t wome n wouldn' t see m huma n t o me. They' d see m s o unnatura l an d stilted. " Ye t i t wa s th e artific e o f social ritua l tha t allowe d me n an d wome n t o spen d tim e together , t o become friend s an d lovers . Marion Taylor , humiliate d bu t undaunte d b y her first disastrou s date , self-consciousl y reworke d he r socia l skill s t o attract men . " I a m learnin g t o 'jolly ' an d 'smal l talk, ' t o 'flirt ' i n a n embryonic, amateuris h sor t o f way ! . . . And I a m makin g mor e o f m y appearance tha n I ever hav e before." 53 Taylor, o f course , als o recognize d tha t havin g me n tak e he r ou t onl y served t o provid e th e occasio n fo r "crude , primitiv e love-making, " th e necking an d pettin g "universall y practice d o n a colleg e campus. " Sh e could barel y suppres s he r excitemen t a t th e prospec t o f havin g on e o f her date s tak e he r "ou t int o th e fres h excitin g nigh t an d pu t hi s ar m around m e again. " Sh e kne w sh e harbore d littl e affectio n fo r he r date ; rather, sh e crave d th e "shee r physica l excitemen t an d th e intoxicatin g knowledge tha t on e i s admire d an d desired." 54 Datin g provide d a socia l setting fo r socia l recreatio n tha t almos t inevitabl y becam e sexua l recrea tion. Th e pettin g partie s scandalize d an d fascinate d earl y twentieth century middle-clas s adult s an d convince d critic s tha t " a socia l revolu tion i n manner s an d morals " ha d take n place . Ye t pettin g partie s als o showed tha t eve n physical caresse s could b e done amon g one' s peers an d were subjec t t o pee r judgments . Ernes t Burgess , a sociologist , writin g i n the earl y 1930s , recognize d tha t th e ne w sexua l exploration s o f Ameri can yout h di d no t revea l mora l declin e bu t wer e "phenomen a o f grou p determinism," o r shift s i n th e pattern s o f behavio r o f a n entir e genera tion tha t typicall y replace d th e stricture s o f the family wit h thos e of "th e intimate socia l group." 55

Flaming Youth 3

1

Petting allowe d America n adolescent s t o domesticat e desire , t o mak e commonplace thos e caresse s reserve d fo r th e betrothe d amon g th e Vic torian middl e class . Som e sophisticate d colleg e student s woul d eve n claim t o hav e mad e neckin g a fine art tha t brok e awa y fro m th e "preva lent conceptio n o f eroticis m a s merel y a mechanis m o f propagation , o r as a brute , delightfu l sin." 56 A pamphlet prepare d b y the YMC A t o hel p college yout h throug h th e confusion s o f romanc e receive d th e dubiou s honor o f bein g referre d t o b y The Nation a s " A Manua l fo r Petters. " The Sex Life of Youth too k a pragmaticall y conservativ e approac h to ward question s of sex , assuring young men and women tha t the sex drive was norma l an d providin g seve n test s t o measur e th e propriet y o f pet ting. Althoug h th e author s condemne d sex outsid e o f a lovin g relation ship, the y als o condemne d loveles s marriag e an d conclude d tha t som e experience o f physica l intimac y woul d guid e th e individua l i n discover ing sexua l compatibility. 57 We ca n understan d th e attractio n an d confusio n surroundin g th e ne w sexual practice s throug h th e experienc e o f Jan e Sherman . A s a hig h school studen t o n Lon g Island , Jan e neve r participate d i n smoking , drinking, o r neckin g wit h he r peers , an d althoug h sh e wa s a n attractiv e young woman , sh e ha d n o boyfriends . He r first date , t o a hig h schoo l prom a t ag e sixteen, include d he r mother a s chaperon. Sh e spent most of her fre e moment s a t th e Denishaw n danc e school . He r diar y an d letter s from he r tri p wit h th e Denishaw n Dancer s t o th e Fa r Eas t fro m 192 5 t o 1926 revea l ho w confusin g sh e foun d domesticate d desire . Sh e quickl y discovered tha t youn g America n an d Britis h men i n the Orien t foun d th e Denishawn Dancer s irresistible , an d Jan e i n particula r attracte d th e at tentions o f young diplomat s an d businessmen . He r firs t proposa l o f mar riage cam e i n Manchuria , an d other s followe d i n widel y separate d loca tions. A s me n presse d thei r attentions , presents , an d proposal s o n her , she worrie d ove r th e meanin g o f he r newl y widene d experience . "Thre e men hav e kisse d m e i n m y life , an d eac h on e proposed . . . . But shoul d I let ever y ma n wh o propose s kis s me? " As the tri p continued , sh e share d her worrie s wit h othe r member s o f th e troup e an d adopte d attitude s more i n line with th e mores of her American peers. A year later she could assure he r mothe r tha t an y kissin g sh e ha d don e wa s experimental . Sh e was thrille d a t first bu t the n disappointe d "tha t ther e wasn' t mor e kic k in them. " In a mont h sh e woul d assum e a n eve n mor e blas e attitud e about he r relation s wit h "V, " he r mos t arden t suitor . The y dine d an d drove i n th e evening , sh e wrot e he r mother , bu t h e ha d he r bac k t o th e

32 Flaming

Youth

hotel b y ten. "N o parking , darling ! And besides , V. is really al l right. H e is as harmless a s an affectionat e puppy , a s exuberant an d a s adoring. O f course I let hi m kis s me , bu t tha t neve r hur t anyone , di d it ? Besides , I' m 18 now!" 58 Both Glady s Bel l an d Marth a Lavel l worrie d abou t th e moral s o f youth. Martha , o n th e outsid e o f th e datin g ritual , coul d onl y puzzl e over adolescen t behavior . Gladys , b y contrast , believe d sh e coul d teac h her siste r "th e differenc e betwee n a lover' s kis s an d tha t o f th e worldl y wise 'petter, ' an d s o sav e he r fro m th e erro r I mad e i n permittin g s o much love-making." 59 Edyth e Weine r expresse d th e mor e commo n atti tude o f middle-clas s girl s whe n sh e complaine d abou t he r escor t t o a dance. "Al l th e kid s i n th e bac k sea t wer e neckin g lik e th e devil , an d altho h e di d finally pu t hi s ar m aroun d m e an d pul l m e ove r t o him , h e wasn't nearl y s o ho t a s th e rest , an d h e didn' t kis s m e once." 60 Adel e Siegel too k pettin g fo r grante d a s par t o f th e bridg e betwee n boy s an d girls. O n a Woodcrafters hike , "Cani o D i Cairan o wa s very attentiv e t o me." Afterward , "W e staye d ou t o n th e porc h unti l rea l late—afte r ten . Canio an d I go t acquainted. " Adele , i n fact , liste d th e boy s an d youn g men sh e wa s involve d wit h a t ag e fifteen, describin g thei r qualitie s i n somewhat th e wa y prescribe d b y earlie r cha p books , revealin g whic h excelled o r faile d a t conversatio n o r othe r socia l graces . Unlike th e cha p book, however, Adele's diary entry includes her rating of her beaus when it cam e t o "n, " presumabl y necking . O f one , " A goo d pal . Ca n tel l hi m practically anythin g an d he'l l answe r question s t o everything . Don' t mind hi m n. " O f another , "Won' t g o ou t wit h hi m a t all . Poo r company—tries t o pleas e me , however—don't lik e him ver y much , an d absolutely dislik e hi m n. " Fo r Siegel , th e thrill s o f neckin g wer e quit e separate fro m emotiona l excitement . Abou t th e youn g ma n wh o excite d her th e mos t (" I gues s I' m i n lov e wit h him." ) sh e wrote , "Lik e hi m al l round excep t n . a t Jane's." 61 Adele Siegel' s lis t o f fifteen suitor s show s he r succes s wit h boy s an d men (th e younges t wa s sixteen , th e oldes t twenty-four ) an d als o show s the mi x o f persona l attraction s an d pee r judgment s involve d i n adoles cent socializing . Afte r th e Apri l hik e wher e sh e becam e acquainte d wit h Canio D i Cairano , sh e becam e mor e an d mor e involve d wit h him . I n May sh e looked bac k ove r the progress of her affection. Th e first meeting she retrospectivel y characterize d a s "O n porch—hardl y thrilly. " Bu t when a frien d "remark s tha t h e sai d h e like d m e ver y much—(sla m

Flaming Youth 3

3

book) Large r thrill. " A week an d a half later , "Like hi m tremendously." Siegel carefully stresse d tha t sh e "liked" Cani o t o distinguish th e feelin g from love , a muc h mor e seriou s matter , especiall y wit h a n olde r suito r like Cani o (wh o wa s alread y attendin g Wagne r College) . Sh e seeme d well awar e tha t th e opinions o f friends helpe d shap e her affections. "Remarks o f my girl friends , wh o love to talk abou t th e Everlasting Subjec t helps [sic] t o keep him in mind." 62 Although sh e shared he r friends' fascinatio n wit h boys , Adele's enthu siasm fo r romanc e ha d it s limits . Siegel' s diar y reflect s he r impatienc e with Canio' s ardo r an d wit h th e unwante d affectio n o f othe r mal e ad mirers. One boy, who took he r to see a Marx Brother s comedy , "wa s so far gone , al l he could [do ] was look a t m e like—I can' t hel p it—lik e a dog look s a t his master." Anothe r youn g ma n who took he r to a part y "wouldn't behave . I slappe d hi s fac e hard , an d h e wa s ver y respectfu l and gentlemanl y th e res t o f th e evening. " Siege l clearl y wante d t o bal ance bot h companionshi p an d sexual excitement . "Thi s i s what I believe about tha t Everlastin g Subject : tha t I should hav e a s much fu n a s possible wit h al l the boy s I like , flir t jus t a bit , and 'neck ' onl y wit h boy s I really car e for." 63 Popula r wit h boy s an d wit h he r femal e peers , Adel e Siegel could enjo y datin g as recreation, testin g the thrills of romance and sexual desire s but never allowin g eithe r to go too far. Having "IT" — Personality and Beauty The distanc e betwee n Victoria n attitude s towar d intimac y an d those of jazz ag e youth point s towar d a wide-ranging chang e i n the middle-clas s experience o f self . Victoria n wome n an d me n assume d som e dee p an d private essenc e as the core of the self. Whereas one' s character—the lin k between sel f and society—might gro w and shift, sel f remained essentiall y fixed. I n romanti c love , Victorian me n and women foun d opportunitie s to shar e an d reveal thi s essentia l self . A decades-long shif t i n America n culture tha t questione d th e depth an d immutability o f self led Americans to equat e th e authentic individua l wit h wha t the y sa w of the individual. It was during th e 1920 s tha t Willia m Sheldo n suggeste d tha t personalit y types migh t correspon d t o physica l proportions , a n ide a give n seriou s consideration amon g socia l scientist s an d in the popular media . Adoles cents an d young adult s learne d t o valu e self-presentatio n an d social acceptance ove r qualitie s o f intellec t o r character . " I hav e spell s o f think -

34 Flaming

Youth

ing, tha t personalit y i s mor e importan t tha n immortality, " Emil y Clar k wrote t o th e autho r Josep h Hergesheimer. 64 Physicalit y an d appearanc e became th e standard s fo r judgin g personalit y an d eve n persona l worth . Young wome n too k a kee n interes t i n thei r bodie s an d i n their physi cal abilitie s an d th e abilitie s o f others . Th e sexualizatio n o f socia l rela tions undoubtedl y mad e wome n mor e awar e o f themselve s a s physica l beings. Bu t the y di d no t limi t th e awarenes s o f thei r physica l live s t o their se x lives . Doroth y Thompson , strugglin g wit h th e problem s o f learning t o ic e skate a t thirty-eight , believe d tha t he r so n wa s "bette r of f than [she ] was , becaus e h e live s i n a worl d whic h ha s discovere d tha t people hav e bodies." 65 Dancing , a s w e hav e seen , gav e wome n on e wa y to enjo y physica l activity . Sport s provide d another . Basketbal l wa s th e sport o f preference fo r Doroth y Smit h an d Elizabet h Yates . Adele Siegel, on a dat e wit h he r futur e husband , playe d basketbal l wit h hi m a t th e St . George Hotel . The y als o swa m an d dance d befor e h e too k he r home . Sarah Bradle y worke d o n he r basket-shootin g skills , bu t sh e di d bette r at firs t bas e o n he r schoo l softbal l team. 66 Man y o f th e wome n i n ou r group delighte d i n horsebac k riding , an d althoug h thi s point s t o a clas s distinction i n th e cas e o f Elizabet h Yate s and , perhaps , Miria m Va n Waters, the arden t rider s als o include d An n Mari e Lo w an d Glady s Bell, both fro m humble r families . Summe r cam p gav e furthe r opportunitie s for health y livin g an d physica l exertion , an d thi s prove d th e mos t popu lar summe r vacatio n fo r thes e women . Yate s taugh t horsebac k ridin g t o younger childre n a t camp , Doroth y Smit h taugh t music , an d bot h Viol a White an d Winifre d Willi s wen t t o summe r retreat s t o allo w the m tim e to write. Camp would continu e a s an attractive activit y for man y of these women beyon d thei r youth . Harrie t Louis e Hard y wen t campin g t o re cover he r closenes s t o God , an d Miria m Va n Water s looke d fo r a re newed sens e o f purpos e o n yearl y cam p vacations . Watching sport s als o gav e youn g wome n a n awarenes s o f physica l vitality. All of the women wh o wrot e abou t thei r high school years either participated i n sport s o r attende d sportin g event s a s spectators . Glady s Bell cheered s o heartily fo r he r Grov e Cit y Colleg e football tea m that sh e felt he r "nerve s were on strike." 67 Although majo r leagu e baseball gaine d enormously i n popularit y durin g th e 1920s , non e o f thes e wome n re corded attendin g a major leagu e game. Many o f them , however , wen t t o games o f loca l team s an d too k a keen interes t i n the games. "Jack Wyld e hit a tw o bagger, " Sara h Bradle y wrot e o f a gam e betwee n tw o loca l teams.68 Rut h Raymon d gav e muc h o f he r spar e tim e t o followin g hig h

Flaming Youth 3

5

school an d tow n team s in baseball, football, an d basketball . In the sprin g and summe r followin g he r senio r yea r i n hig h schoo l sh e attende d sev enteen loca l games . Ove r roughl y th e sam e month s i n 1930 , she went t o twenty-nine games . Sh e ofte n wrot e i n knowin g detai l abou t th e game s she saw. For instance, in August 193 0 sh e went o n for fiv e pages describing ever y major pla y o f a town leagu e basebal l game. 69 Along wit h sports , cinema an d advertisin g depicte d yout h an d healt h as centra l t o persona l appeal . Middle-clas s diarist s ofte n discusse d beauty. Som e retained a concept o f beaut y that referre d t o spiritual qual ities. Glady s Bel l wondered i f sh e coul d hol d hersel f t o a hig h standard : "Morally, spiritually , intellectuall y an d physicall y beautiful!" 70 He r in clusion o f physica l beauty , however , underscore s th e plac e tha t appear ance assume d i n he r lif e an d als o th e assumptio n tha t physica l beaut y might ben d t o th e will . I n a wide-rangin g discussion , mainl y abou t sports, Rut h Raymon d considere d wit h he r fathe r "th e fac t tha t lac k o f beauty ofte n mar s a girl' s character." 71 Novelis t Elino r Gly n wrot e tha t "plain wome n ar e alway s a t a disadvantage " i n th e Darwinia n struggl e for mating . A commo n assumptio n o f th e earl y twentiet h centur y wa s that prope r die t an d exercis e coul d mak e al l wome n beautiful . Marth a Lavell too k i t fo r grante d tha t sh e coul d achiev e a perfec t body , whic h required tha t sh e gai n bot h weigh t an d strength. 72 Middle-clas s wome n believed tha t the y coul d becom e beautifu l i f the y exercise d consciou s control an d use d th e product s tha t th e econom y mad e available ; the y learned t o worr y i f they failed . After th e tur n o f th e centur y th e weigh t tha t onc e woul d hav e give n evidence of robust goo d healt h seeme d excessiv e and unappealing . Amer ican wome n cam e t o se e unwante d weigh t a s a persona l failing . On e physician wondere d wh y "girl s with a tendency t o get fat an d gross " did not consul t expert s o r book s "o n th e scienc e o f reducin g comfortably , and the n se e t o i t tha t the y sta y slender?" 73 A s athlete s youn g wome n experienced themselve s a s fi t an d energetic . Ye t eve n th e mos t activ e young wome n coul d find themselve s fighting of f a fe w pounds . Jan e Sherman, givin g nightl y danc e recital s durin g he r tou r o f th e Orient , went fro m n o t o 12 0 withou t realizin g it , an d he r weigh t continue d t o climb i n spit e o f debilitatin g diets . The weigh t gain , unpardonabl e fo r a Denishawn dancer , thre w he r int o despair . Doroth y Smit h an d Carolin e Gordon approache d 12 0 fro m th e othe r direction , givin g the m caus e t o rejoice.74 Dietin g coul d swee p throug h a colleg e campus , a s i t di d a t Bates Colleg e i n 1923 . Glady s Hast y wrot e hom e tha t everyon e i n he r

3 6 Flaming

Youth

house wa s tryin g t o reduc e "an d i t is a continuous serie s of, 'Gee , I'm s o hungry' . . . 'Hey, what di d you eat this noon.' . . . 'Look ca n you se e I'm a littl e thinner.' " 75 Young wome n als o worrie d abou t thei r hair . Th e adolescen t girl , according t o psychoanalys t Phylli s Blanchard , talk s incessantl y "o f th e 'Castle clip ' o r 'Mar y Pickfor d curls' ; . . . her on e concer n i s to se e tha t her newl y put-u p lock s ar e arrange d accordin g t o th e lates t vogue." 76 Journalist Clar a Savag e Littledal e i n on e o f he r Good Housekeeping articles discusse d th e concer n tha t a woman' s hai r migh t evoke . "Eve n the mos t sensibl e amon g u s bemoa n gra y hairs , begi n t o loo k fo r the m at twenty-five , worr y abou t them. " Shapin g hai r t o cultura l demands , and providin g a hos t o f othe r service s al l summarize d unde r a singl e term, fuele d th e growth i n the numbe r o f beaut y parlors , from five thousand i n 192 0 t o fort y thousan d te n year s later. 77 The righ t appearanc e mean t ne w standard s fo r ski n a s wel l a s hair . The heroin e o f a romanti c nove l o f th e perio d referre d t o he r beautifu l white ski n a s "on e o f m y assets—par t o f m y capital." 78 Th e cosmetic s industry wa s a $i8o-millio n busines s b y 1930 . Psychologis t an d adver tising executiv e John Watso n manage d t o convinc e American s to bu y a n underarm deodoran t tha t require d th e weare r t o kee p th e arm s raise d for te n minute s whil e i t drie d s o tha t i t wouldn' t har m clothing . Th e advertisers wh o toute d th e wonder s o f soap , facial creams , an d deodor ants cocreate d th e cultura l presumptio n tha t beaut y coul d ben d t o th e will. The y als o knowingl y exploite d an d aggravate d women' s anxiet y that the y faile d t o measur e u p t o th e standard s tha t thei r cultur e hel d out fo r them . Margaret Sanger' s advic e i n a book t o young women seek ing marriage an d happines s reflecte d th e importanc e o f personal appear ance an d th e assumptio n tha t beaut y coul d b e achieve d throug h effor t and expenditure . "Th e car e o f th e body, " sh e wrote , stressin g th e valu e of prope r habits , "bot h outwardl y an d inwardly , th e bathin g an d thor ough cleanlines s o f al l o f it s orifices , giv e the gir l a n assuranc e o f sweet smelling cleanlines s whic h give s he r a n invaluabl e assuranc e an d confi dence i n he r ow n powe r o f attractiveness." 79 Although som e youn g wome n di d find assuranc e abou t thei r appearance—Edythe Weine r believe d sh e was more attractiv e than mos t girls, even though i n her ow n judgmen t sh e remained unpopular—i t wa s far mor e commo n fo r hig h schoo l girl s t o lamen t thei r looks . Mario n Taylor foun d jus t abou t everythin g abou t he r fac e unsatisfactory—thin , lifeless hair , pu g nose , forehea d to o high . Elizabet h Yate s foun d faul t

Flaming Youth 3

7

with he r hai r (frizzy ) an d als o wit h he r figure. 80 Bet h Twigga r admitte d that sh e was pretty , bu t onl y a t times , and "awkwardl y loathesom e [sic] at others. " Sh e lamente d agai n an d agai n i n he r diar y tha t sh e wa s to o tall. "I can't ge t used to bein g so big—I won't sa y large." 81 One souther n woman remembere d tha t whe n he r picture was first taken, a t age twelve, she expecte d t o se e that sh e looked "lik e Mar y Pickfor d o r Norm a Tall madge." Wha t sh e sa w ruine d he r illusion s o f beauty : " I sa w mysel f fo r the first tim e a s completely an d hopelessl y ugly." 82 Beth Twiggar wante d t o loo k lik e her petit e sister , who i n additio n t o being "slim , short, slender " ha d "it." 83 B y the late 1920s , Americans ha d changed "a n impersona l neute r pronoun " int o "th e symbo l o f personal ity." Elinor Glyn , novelist an d screenwriter , promote d "it " a s an interna l essence tha t inevitabl y attracte d th e opposit e sex . I n th e 192 7 movi e "It," th e comi c figure o f Mont y goe s searchin g fo r "it " i n a departmen t store. H e walk s alon g a lingeri e counte r wher e wome n clerk s ar e line d up fo r inspection , a s thoug h i n a beaut y pageant . Whe n h e spot s Clar a Bow, h e know s h e ha s foun d "it. " Tha t a n unselfconsciou s essenc e should mak e itsel f know n throug h physica l appearanc e suggest s ho w cinema equate d goo d look s an d goodness . I t als o point s t o th e sexuali zation o f selfhood, sinc e "it" could mea n eithe r an interesting personalit y or sex appeal. "When a mere schoolgirl boast s of having 'it, ' " a contemporary psychologis t groused , "sh e mean s simpl y that sh e is the possesso r of a personality tha t woul d attrac t men." 84 Personality di d no t mea n merel y goo d looks . A physicia n offerin g advice for girl s on ho w t o win me n withou t becomin g too fre e wit h thei r bodies sai d tha t me n wil l b e attracte d t o wome n wh o ar e "friendl y o r affectionate o r a joll y partne r fo r a n outing." 85 Edyth e Weine r spen t a study perio d i n th e schoo l librar y readin g a stor y "tha t containe d som e awfully tru e things. " According t o he r source , fo r a gir l t o becom e pop ular, sh e "mus t hav e four things : A . goo d looks . B . goo d clothes . C . nerve. D . practice." 86 Persona l qualitie s othe r tha n beaut y stil l counted , although ho w muc h the y weighe d i n th e balanc e depende d o n th e cir cumstances o f variou s women . Stag e actres s Lillia n Rot h believe d tha t she moved fro m singin g to starrin g roles in the musicals when a showgir l friend convince d he r t o sli m dow n fro m 13 5 t o 116 . Sh e attracte d th e attention o f a n importan t produce r wh o ha d formerl y onl y acknowl edged he r i n passing . "Perhap s i t wasn' t th e talen t yo u had , o r th e per sonality," Rot h concluded , "i t was the form divine. " Ruth Raymond , o n the othe r hand , wh o sa w hersel f a s attractive , nevertheles s spen t danc e

3 8 Flaming

Youth

after danc e watchin g other s dance . "Tel l me, " sh e aske d a frien d a t on e dance afte r tw o me n ha d aske d he r abou t othe r women , "haven' t I an y sex appeal?" 87 To hav e "it " a gir l o r youn g woma n ha d t o b e prett y an d sh e ha d t o find way s o f attractin g th e attentio n o f boy s o r youn g men . Ye t "it " di d not presum e intelligence , an d mos t youn g wome n learne d tha t obviou s ability wa s a liability . A seventeen-year-ol d admitte d tha t th e movie s gave he r lesson s i n love-makin g an d showe d he r "tha t ba d an d prett y girls ar e usuall y mor e attractiv e t o me n tha n intelligen t an d studiou s girls." 88 In "It, " Clar a Bow' s characte r twic e finds hersel f confrontin g a class barrier—he r ignoranc e o f French . Sh e manage s bot h time s t o dodge th e problem , showin g tha t nativ e wi t an d nerv e ar e mor e impor tant tha n education . A popula r advic e columnis t wrot e tha t me n don' t like "superio r women." 89 Rut h Raymond' s fathe r learne d fro m a conversation o n a bus that Ruth' s achievement s i n school had probabl y worke d against her : "al l o f the m wer e alway s ashame d becaus e yo u kne w every thing an d the y didn' t kno w anything. " H e presume d tha t wa s wh y n o one dance d wit h her , an d h e tol d he r so. 90 Mario n Taylo r coul d no t understand ho w on e o f he r friend s coul d assum e suc h "sill y bab y ways " around boy s o r wh y th e boy s seeme d t o lik e it . He r fathe r tol d Mario n that whe n th e righ t ma n cam e alon g " 'he ' will care more abou t th e cut e little cur l behin d m y ea r tha n fo r m y opinion s o n th e whynes s o f th e unknowable." 91 Edyth e Weine r recognize d tha t he r clevernes s a t schoo l probably hur t he r with th e boys . "That's why , lately, in school, I've trie d not t o appea r to o smart." 92 Th e pee r cultur e o f th e hig h schoo l gav e status fo r excellenc e i n sport s o r othe r area s o f th e extracurriculu m an d for popularit y wit h peer s bu t no t fo r goo d grades . In he r self-analysi s an d secre t sham e ove r bein g unpopular , Edyth e Weiner wishe d tha t sh e coul d se e hersel f a s other s sa w her . "The n I' d know m y fault s an d b e abl e t o correc t them." 93 I n th e America n cultur e that emerge d b y th e 1920s , the judgment s o f one' s peer s becam e funda mental mark s o f persona l worth . Fo r adolescents , the y wer e definitive . And hig h schoo l girls , who depende d o n boy s for invitation s t o danc e o r to g o out, foun d themselve s a t the mercy o f male judgments. Jessie Lloyd cried a t nigh t ove r bein g ignore d a t hig h schoo l dance s an d convince d herself tha t sh e wa s ugly . Reflectin g o n he r lac k o f succes s a t variou s dances Rut h Raymon d decide d tha t wha t sh e neede d "wasn' t a chanc e at a man—it wa s a n Act of God." 94 Ilk a Chase , later a successful actress , wrote tha t "nothin g make s m e happie r tha n t o realiz e I cannot possibl y

Flaming Youth 3

9

relive m y youth. " A s a debutant e sh e was invite d t o al l o f th e importan t balls for th e year after hig h school , yet she spent most of her time waiting along th e wal l pretendin g t o enjo y hersel f unti l he r "fac e ache d fro m smiling brightly , an d the n th e laughin g littl e excus e tha t yo u reall y ha d to powde r you r nose , an d th e escap e int o th e ladies ' room." 95 T o avoi d such humiliation , girl s sough t popularity . Edyth e Weiner' s readin g brought hom e anothe r "truth " abou t th e pee r culture : "I f i t gets aroun d that a gir l i s unpopular , sh e migh t jus t a s wel l mov e t o anothe r stat e o r enter a n ol d ladies ' home!" 96 As youn g peopl e relie d mor e o n thei r peers , the y ofte n foun d them selves a t a greate r distanc e fro m thei r families . Rathe r tha n wea r a n unattractive woole n shir t t o school , Edyth e Weine r pu t u p wit h he r fa ther's anger , abuse , and punishment . Sh e hated goin g to the movies wit h her family , "becaus e i f an y o f th e kid s se e you , the y thin k yo u wer e s o hard u p yo u didn' t hav e anyon e els e to g o with." 97 Submitting persona l qualitie s t o th e judgments o f their peer s prepare d adolescents fo r a n economi c syste m tha t demande d socia l skill s fo r suc cess. The pee r cultur e gav e American middle-clas s adolescent s guideline s for understandin g themselve s an d fo r evaluatin g self-worth . I t becam e the contex t i n whic h hig h schoo l student s learne d ho w t o ac t wit h on e another includin g ho w t o achiev e acceptance , gai n interpersona l inti macy, an d enhanc e self-esteem . Th e valu e o f one' s personalit y depende d on one' s succes s wit h others . Fo r th e pee r culture , th e personalit y con sisted o f physica l fitness an d attractivenes s an d skill s a t socializing . Girl s flirted wit h boys ; wit h othe r girl s the y discusse d th e "Everlastin g Sub ject," tha t is , their relation s wit h boys . With bot h gender s the y demon strated interes t an d awarenes s o f activitie s value d b y th e group , suc h a s sports an d othe r element s o f th e extracurriculum , an d indifferenc e t o academic subjects. 98 Emotion and Social Performance Success o r failur e a t socia l performanc e largel y shape d th e emotiona l lives o f youn g women . Bet h Twiggar , whos e diarie s cove r mos t o f he r high schoo l an d colleg e years , allow s u s t o follo w a socia l performanc e with grea t variabilit y an d a wid e rang e o f emotiona l experience . Bet h lived i n a comfortabl y middle-clas s family , th e younges t o f thre e girls . Her diarie s ar e chatt y an d self-reflectiv e b y turns , wit h entrie s ofte n dashed of f i n th e hea t o f ange r o r humiliation , o r reflectin g calml y o n

40 Flaming

Youth

some triumphan t momen t i n he r young life . A s with othe r girls , Beth' s life a s a n adolescen t ofte n conflicte d wit h he r family' s idea s fo r her . "God Dam n m y family anyway . Bickerin g an d pettyness [sic] an d picking continually," sh e complains in one passage. She runs through a litany of the nagging complaint s throw n a t her and ends b y reporting a fit that she threw back . " I was heaving and swearing an d growling and shriekily protesting an d now here a m I in my room alone , a littl e wor n out , but satisfied."99 Family playe d onl y a mino r rol e i n Beth' s diaries . Mos t frequentl y Beth wrot e abou t pee r relationships , particularl y abou t boy s an d dates , and sh e reflecte d o n he r personalit y an d th e popula r acceptanc e tha t dating represented . "I' m sadl y boy-sick, " sh e admitted i n on e passage . Like Edythe Weiner, prayin g for lots of dates, Beth Twiggar summarize d her goal s succinctly : " I wante d t o b e popular , t o g o out , to dance , t o know boy s an d boy s an d boys. " Bet h believe d tha t he r pee r cultur e offered he r possibilities that her mother coul d never understand. She selfconsciously place d hersel f amon g th e flaming yout h o f he r day: "I lov e dates and boys and whoopee, road houses , smoke and jazz. I'm not quite so fa r gon e a s t o sa y I've develope d a craz e fo r neckin g an d drinking , but th e two are symbols o f my summers [sic] debauch."100 Beth's desir e t o attrac t boy s le d t o self-consciousnes s abou t he r appearance. Sh e worried abou t he r height—a t leas t a s tal l a s he r father , enough t o "bligh t th e lif e o f almos t an y girl"—an d he r weight , "Oh , I'm reducing . N o kidding. " Afte r th e inspiration o f the film Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, sh e decide d sh e wante d t o becom e a gol d digger . Bu t when sh e looked i n th e mirror , sh e fel t tha t th e onl y gol d diggin g sh e could d o woul d b e i n overall s "wit h a n ox! " He r desir e fo r beaut y shaped Beth' s consume r consciousness . Sh e could quickl y lis t numerou s cold crea m an d facial preparations—Ponds , Dagge r e t Ramsell, Wood bury, Ecloyer , Coty , Venician , Penaud , Elizabet h Arden , Rubenstein — and delighte d i n the results o f an Elizabeth Arde n bat h product : "Veril y Elizabeth i s a witch! " Feminin e undergarment s enhance d he r sens e o f beauty. "Ste p in s positively inspir e me! " she wrote a s an introduction t o the varietie s o f colors an d trimmings o f the garments sh e sewed fo r her self.101 Beauty existe d fo r Bet h Twigga r a s socia l performance . Desir e fo r sophistication le d her to rea d Harper's Bazaar, t o practice smokin g cig arettes i n front o f her mirror, an d to experiment wit h cosmetics . Feeling beautiful an d sophisticated migh t enhance her self-esteem, bu t for confir -

Flaming Youth 4

1

2.1 Bet h Twiggar at age sixteen. Courtesy of Beth Twiggar Goff . mation o f self-wort h Bet h looke d fo r evidenc e tha t sh e ha d achieve d popularity wit h bot h boy s an d girls . Suc h a measur e o f self-wort h wa s maddeningly publi c an d quantifiabl e i n th e numbe r o f boy s sh e at tracted. Unfortunatel y fo r Beth , eve n thi s measur e wa s subjec t t o per sonal an d pee r judgments . Beth enjoye d listin g he r succes s wit h boys : "Steven , Billy , Newton .

42 Flaming

Youth

And other s no t s o nameable, " sh e wrot e a t th e en d o f on e summe r vacation. "Methink s Bet h ha s bee n flirting ! Well , w e girl s d o wan t ou r fun!" Th e followin g winte r sh e compile d a longe r list , includin g Steve , Billy, an d Newton , alon g wit h earlie r an d mor e recen t conquests . List s like thes e gav e Bet h Twigga r a chanc e fo r self-examination , t o se e if sh e was approachin g he r goal , "t o hav e boy s o n waitin g lists. " She hoped t o match th e succes s o f a girlfriend wh o wa s "som e hot mama! " Th e num ber o f dates , however , coul d neve r stan d alon e a s a criterio n o f success . When a boy "mad e certai n advances " at a movie in Tarrytown an d late r promised t o writ e t o her , sh e fel t excite d unti l sh e learne d fro m a frien d that h e wa s "grea t a t pickin g up . S o I' m a littl e ashame d o f mysel f fo r being s o easy. " O n th e othe r han d Steve , alread y liste d twice , gaine d i n Beth's estimatio n whe n a frien d tol d he r sh e thought h e had "se x appea l and it an d a fe w othe r things . S o no w guide d a s I alway s a m b y th e opinion o f other s h e has double d i n attractio n fo r me." 102 For Beth , boys , dates , necking , an d popularit y al l came a s a package . "I wan t a bo y friend, " sh e complaine d durin g a lul l i n he r socia l life . " I want t o b e cuddle d (M e th e Mammoth ) petted , necke d an d improperl y delt [sic] with. . . . I want t o b e sough t afte r caugh t ofte n an d generall y popular." He r diarie s sho w tha t sh e grew mor e comfortabl e wit h physi cal intimac y an d mor e competen t a t it . O f he r "firs t love, " Herbert, sh e wrote, " I wiggl e whe n h e trie s t o nec k me . . . . " Eve n i f i t wa s uncom fortable, sh e coul d stil l reve l i n th e description . " . . . I li e in chair s wit h a bo y besid e m e . . . hi s hand gettin g fres h an d hi s face gettin g close. " A year an d a hal f later , a mor e experience d Bet h woul d spen d tim e wit h an olde r man . " 'Go d Girl, ' " h e told her , " 'yo u certainl y ca n love! ' " A knowing Bet h commented, "Bu t he was wrong. I can't love , I can merel y neck." Neckin g carrie d it s ow n satisfaction , althoug h i t wa s no t clearl y a product o f sexual excitement. Bet h Twiggar, a t the end of a disappoint ingly quie t weekend , complained , " I want a b e necked ! I do! It give s m e a sensatio n I love." 103 Yet th e pleasure s o f sexua l excitemen t an d socia l succes s ha d t o b e balanced agains t th e danger s o f pee r disapproval . Adolescen t female s still foun d themselve s a t th e merc y o f a doubl e standar d tha t coul d pun ish the m wit h persona l humiliatio n an d eve n publi c shaming . Girl s "owned" sex , t o th e exten t tha t boys , shor t o f assault , require d thei r dates' permissio n o r a t leas t taci t acceptanc e o f thei r advances . Yet , a s Beth painfull y recognize d i n he r self-reflection , a desir e t o remai n popu lar wit h boy s mean t tha t girl s ha d t o b e generou s wit h thei r wealth ,

Flaming Youth 4

3

risking th e scor n o f th e sam e boy s the y hope d t o attract . Teen-age d Pat , in Flaming Youth, fo r example , becam e th e topic o f a male discussio n a t one o f th e man y partie s describe d i n th e book . "To o easy, " commente d one young man . "She' s go t a teasin' wa y wit h her, " sai d another. 104 The downsid e o f popularity cam e painfully hom e to Beth . She learned that on e bo y ha d remarke d o f he r t o hi s friend s "tha t ther e wa s gol d i n them tha r hills. " Thi s wa s followe d "b y a mea n chuckle. " Fro m he r sense o f hersel f a s growin g i n popularity , sh e suddenl y confronte d a reputation o f bein g to o eage r an d o f attractin g boy s a s a mer e "conven ience, a n appendage " o f a mor e popula r friend . "Wh o th e hel l wants t o take ou t Bet h Twiggar? " wa s th e recor d o f on e boy' s commen t tha t sh e put a t th e head o f a long diar y entr y i n which sh e reflected o n her feelin g of loss . Humiliation mad e itsel f apparen t t o Bet h a s physical pain . " I a m feeling unutterabl y badly, " sh e wrote . " I a m hurt , battered , wholl y crushed," a s thoug h sh e ha d begu n t o fee l th e "maulin g an d hauling " we saw her describ e earlier. The boys ' comments "ar e making me squir m and suffer. " Withou t th e "joyou s illusion " o f popularity, sh e returned t o a sens e o f hersel f a s unattractive , unlovable , an d fundamentall y flawed. "Hate me! " sh e wrote t o hersel f a t th e en d o f he r narrative. 105 Sexual modernizatio n allowe d adolescent s t o mor e readil y accep t physical desir e a s a norma l par t o f life . Ye t th e benefi t o f thi s widenin g recognition accrue d mainl y t o boy s an d men . Girl s an d youn g women , who foun d the y ha d wide r latitud e fo r physica l enjoyment , als o face d the lingerin g condemnation s o f Victoria n morality . Fo r al l he r impa tience wit h he r famil y an d wit h he r mother' s incomprehensio n o f wha t it mean t t o b e moder n an d sophisticated , Bet h Twigga r coul d stil l occa sionally experienc e renewe d "self-respect " whe n sh e refuse d t o allo w easy familiarity . " I want othe r peopl e t o lik e me and peopl e m y own ag e to respect me! " That Bet h Twiggar an d othe r middle-clas s young wome n of th e jazz ag e shoul d find themselve s draw n t o th e new sexua l freedom s but stil l a t ris k fro m th e ol d sexua l moralit y reveal s th e incompletenes s of th e ne w attitude s towar d women' s sexuality . N o wonde r tha t on e o f the wishe s th e fourteen-year-ol d Bet h Twigga r ha d fo r he r fair y god mother wa s t o hav e n o conscience. 106 Middle-class adolescen t wome n i n th e 1920 s discovere d a worl d o f thrilling heterosexua l possibilities . Ne w form s o f physica l intimac y be came common a s boys and girl s dated a s couples. The thrills of closenes s were combined wit h thos e o f becomin g the center o f attraction fo r man y young me n an d a recognize d succes s i n thei r pee r group . Ye t th e emo -

44 Flaming

Youth

tional satisfaction s o f thes e triumph s cam e a t th e ris k o f losin g socia l acceptability, o f a sens e o f los s o f self-worth , an d o f humiliation . Fo r boys, wh o als o ha d th e possibilit y o f greate r physica l intimacy , humilia tion wa s rarel y a threat . I n fact , th e humiliatio n o f youn g wome n coul d become a mean s o f protectio n fo r youn g me n wh o coul d us e a forme r date's behavio r a s a topic o f scornfu l derision . The emotiona l experience s o f heterosexual sociabilit y for middle-clas s high schoo l girl s depende d largel y o n pee r approval . Datin g an d popu larity di d no t simpl y follo w fro m th e possessio n o f "it; " thes e socia l customs enacte d "it. " Socia l succes s mean t se x appeal , whic h mean t a good personality , whic h mean t socia l success . Rather tha n bringin g pas sion o r idealize d love , se x appea l mean t acceptanc e b y boy s bu t als o b y girls. A youn g woma n attendin g Universit y o f Californi a Lo s Angele s showed th e complicated mi x of social ambitions an d personal attraction s when sh e characterize d he r desir e fo r a ma n a s a longin g "fo r compan ionship, fo r th e thril l o f it , fo r admiration , fo r sel f confidence , fo r sho w purposes, for a n escort to take me places, for th e satisfaction o f curiosity , and fo r surceas e o f Sprin g Fever." 107 Th e pee r culture , blendin g int o th e mass cultur e o f movie s an d advertising , shape d heterosexua l relation s and adolescen t personality . Homo sociality and Emotion Young wome n wer e capabl e o f fa r les s public an d fa r mor e ferven t feel ings tha n thos e generall y associate d wit h dating . A s thes e girl s becam e young wome n the y ofte n foun d tha t som e individua l ma n becam e mor e and mor e importan t i n thei r live s an d the y bega n t o attemp t t o under stand love . Althoug h w e explor e romanti c lov e i n th e nex t chapter , th e experience o f a deepl y fel t passionat e commitmen t t o anothe r gir l o r woman wa s commo n amon g adolescen t wome n i n th e earl y decade s o f the twentiet h century . Thes e relationship s offere d bot h profoun d satis factions an d deepl y fel t pain . Homosocia l o r homosexua l relation s gav e adolescents emotiona l experience s far les s structured b y peer groups tha n heterosexual relation s an d wit h fewe r cultura l expectation s t o confor m to. The 1920 s no w appear s a s the decad e whe n th e romanti c friendship s so commo n fo r middle-clas s wome n i n th e nineteent h centur y bega n t o disappear o r to becom e identifie d wit h pathologica l behavior . On e stud y of colleg e sexualit y i n th e 1930 s suggeste d tha t passionat e attachment s

Flaming Youth 4

5

between wome n ha d becom e les s common . Claimin g a "heterosexua l counterrevolution" ma y g o to o far , bu t i t i s clea r tha t durin g th e earl y decades o f th e centur y a stron g emphasi s emerge d i n th e yout h cultur e on winnin g dates ; amon g youn g wome n i n colleg e an d a t work , finding and landin g husband s becam e a pressing concern. 108 Our wor k strongl y suggests , however, tha t i t was not unti l a t least th e 1930s that heterosexua l relation s bega n t o completely replace passionat e female friendship s amon g middle-clas s adolescents . Amon g th e thirty nine women whos e diaries o r othe r persona l papers we studied, eighteen , nearly half , wrot e o f affectionat e o r passionat e relation s wit h othe r women durin g adolescenc e o r later . Th e natur e o f thes e relationship s varied s o greatl y i t i s difficul t t o offe r an y singl e ter m tha t characterize s all o f them . The y al l include d friendship , bu t the y achieve d level s o f warmth, idealization , o r devotio n tha t friendshi p doe s no t adequatel y describe. This closel y matche s th e findings o f Katherine Bemen t Davis in a 192 9 stud y o f on e thousand colleg e women. O f thes e women, 50 5 ha d experienced "intens e emotiona l relations " wit h othe r women . Davi s at tempted t o separat e thes e relation s int o thre e categories—thos e wit h some physical expression , suc h a s hugging o r kissing , but no t recognize d as sexua l (293) ; those without physica l expressio n bu t considere d sexua l (78); and thos e that were fully sexua l with genital contact (234) . Women entered thes e relationships primaril y a s adolescents o r young adults, with 43.5 percen t o f th e relation s beginnin g befor e colleg e an d 35. 5 percen t beginning durin g college . Thes e relationship s continue d afte r th e hig h school years , an d eve n afte r college , fo r th e majorit y o f women . Th e relation coul d las t fo r a fe w month s u p t o a fe w years . On e colleg e woman tol d a sociologica l investigator , "w e al l tasted homosexualit y i n some degree." 109 Psychology an d psychoanalyti c theor y becam e vital for understandin g and marginalizin g intens e friendship s amon g women . Accordin g t o on e psychoanalyst, "On e o f th e commones t perversion s o f th e libid o amon g adolescent girl s i s the fixation o f th e affection s o n member s o f th e sam e sex, and absolut e indifferenc e o r eve n aversio n t o male companionship. " Margaret Mea d remembere d studyin g Freu d a t Barnar d i n 192 0 an d worrying abou t pas t affection s fo r women. 110 Marth a L a veil's diar y shows a growing psychologica l sophistication . "I' m beginnin g t o believ e I'm rathe r abnorma l i n regard s t o likin g boys, " sh e wrot e whil e a n un dergraduate. Tw o year s later , wit h furthe r stud y i n psycholog y an d fa miliarity wit h Freud , Lavel l state d he r situatio n differently . "Evidentl y

46 Flaming

Youth

my emotiona l developmen t ha s neve r reache d th e heterosexua l stage. " She believe d tha t becaus e sh e ha d n o father , transfe r t o a mal e lov e object neve r too k plac e fo r her . Eve n so , sh e recognize d tha t sh e fel t especially "susceptibl e t o a n attractio n fo r women . . . . I t isn't normal , I know; bu t wha t i s on e t o d o abou t it ? . . . And n o matte r ho w muc h I fight agains t it , dismiss it from m y mind immediately , that feeling return s again & again." 111 Psychoanalyti c psychotherap y enable d Doroth y Smith t o recogniz e th e homoeroti c conten t o f he r longin g fo r femal e friends, fro m earl y adolescenc e int o adulthood . Therap y helpe d Smit h t o overcome homoeroti c impulse s an d t o affir m he r attractio n t o Davi d Dushkin, leadin g t o thei r marriag e afte r he r analysi s ended . Ye t i n spit e of narrowin g cultura l acceptance , women' s lov e fo r othe r wome n ofte n continued. Eve n afte r he r marriag e t o Davi d Dushkin , Doroth y Smit h Dushkin stil l yearne d fo r a specia l companionshi p wit h anothe r woman. 112 As these examples suggest, young women learned to understand homo social relationship s a s dysfunctiona l onl y afte r the y reache d college . Yet even fo r youn g adul t women , relationship s wit h othe r wome n frequentl y remained th e mos t importan t emotiona l connection s outsid e thei r fami lies. Hig h schoo l girl s i n th e 1920 s fel t littl e o f th e chang e i n cultura l norms, an d colleg e wome n ofte n ignore d th e norm s the y discovere d i n the classroom . Whe n the y wrot e o f affectio n fo r othe r girl s o r women , they di d s o wit h n o trac e o f guil t o r anxiety . " I d o lov e Effey, " Azali a Peet wrote i n 1913 , "but I don't [want? ] to confine m y love to her . I love Faith bu t thi s ough t no t t o interfer e wit h m y lovin g som e othe r gir l jus t as much." 113 Th e sam e matter-of-fac t styl e appear s almos t twent y year s later, i n Adele Siegel' s diary: "Jea n L . and Jane P . certainly ar e affection ate. Well , I' m gla d the y lov e me." 114 Women too k fo r grante d tha t the y would lov e othe r women , an d als o tha t the y woul d expres s thei r affec tion physicall y an d publicly . A bo y i n a Massachusett s hig h schoo l i n 1928 complaine d abou t th e frequenc y o f femal e attachment s a t hi s hig h school: "The y wal k dow n th e corridor s al l twine d togethe r lik e a figure eight."115 An exceptiona l concer n b y Bet h Twigga r stand s a s testimon y t o th e unexceptional natur e o f affectionat e friendship s amon g high school girls. Beth ha d a specia l relationshi p wit h he r frien d Pegg y for severa l years. It was differen t fro m he r usua l friendship s wit h girl s an d differen t fro m anything sh e describe d experiencin g wit h boys . Bet h experience d thi s and othe r crushe s a s a n enduring , unambiguou s desir e t o b e nea r an d

Flaming Youth 4

7

receive attentio n an d affirmatio n fro m th e girl s sh e admire d an d per ceived a s superio r t o herself . Th e experienc e o f th e crus h wa s over powering, colorin g al l o f he r perceptions . " I lov e that girl, " she wrote of Peggy. " I admir e an d respec t her . Nothin g make s m e happier tha n whe n I hav e he r approval . Nothin g i s s o delightfu l a s t o b e alon e i n he r pres ence." The crus h migh t plac e th e privat e sel f i n a s muc h jeopard y a s datin g could plac e th e publi c self . " I a m bein g submerge d i n he r personality, " Beth wrot e o f he r affectio n fo r Peggy . "I' m hur t b y her indifference , I' m sensitive t o he r moods . . . . I a m no t m y own . I a m he r slave. " I n he r reflection o n he r problem , Bet h considere d i t "a n astonishin g thin g fo r one gir l t o lik e anothe r tha t way . I t i s a harmful , degradin g thing. " Ye t Beth wa s no t complainin g o f intens e friendship s wit h women , onl y th e lack o f mutualit y an d dependenc e sh e foun d i n he r relatio n wit h Peggy . "Loyal friendshi p i s a commendabl e an d admirabl e thing , bu t th e blin d adoration whic h I have fo r Pegg y i s actually ignoble. " The problem , sh e concluded, originate d wit h her . He r dependenc e o n Pegg y showe d "th e weakness, th e futilit y an d th e lac k o f determinatio n whic h ar e me." 116 For Beth , th e experienc e o f vulnerabilit y associate d wit h he r crus h be came intolerabl e whe n th e objec t o f he r affection s faile d t o reciprocat e her admiration . By th e 1920s , girl s love d othe r girl s a s a n expecte d phas e i n adoles cence. I t wa s no t unmentionable , onl y unexceptional . Th e girl s them selves mos t frequentl y referre d t o thei r passio n a s crushes . Katherin e Davis wrot e o f wome n wh o ha d intens e emotiona l relation s wit h physi cal affectio n a s the "regulatio n 'colleg e crush ' type. " Girls, their parents , and expert s coul d al l view the relations a s normal a s long as they carrie d only th e "legitimat e amoun t o f emotio n tha t belong s t o friendship." 117 Girl's relationship s wit h othe r girl s di d no t preclud e enthusiasti c interes t in boys . When Bet h brok e a dat e with Pegg y to g o o n a date with a boy , Peggy becam e furious . " I don' t blam e her, " Bet h wrote . "Bu t I can't se e her, somehow , actin g otherwis e i f ou r position s wer e reversed." 118 On e work warne d tha t "individual s ma y le t relationship s amon g thei r ow n sex, whic h ar e soun d enoug h t o begi n with , hinde r th e developmen t o f relations tha t ope n th e possibilit y o f marriage." 119 Homosocialit y coul d only exist safely i f it made no impact o n the development o f heterosexua l relationships. Ye t passionat e friendship s wer e fa r fro m trivial . Youn g diarists migh t spen d page s o n thei r succes s o r failure s wit h boys , bu t they ofte n describe d fa r stronge r affectio n fo r youn g wome n tha n fo r

48 Flaming

Youth

young men . Boy s an d datin g allowe d girl s t o assimilat e t o a cultur e o f consumption an d socia l performance . Crushe s o n othe r girl s brough t private experience s o f intimac y an d passio n tha t the y rarel y foun d wit h boys. Marion Taylo r lef t a particularl y goo d accoun t o f he r hig h schoo l crushes. Bor n i n 1902 , Taylo r gre w u p nea r Lo s Angeles . He r divorce d mother, who worke d har d t o provide for he r two girls, was not emotion ally demonstrative . Beginnin g a t thirteen , an d continuin g throug h hig h school, Marion woul d hav e crushe s o n a serie s of her teacher s an d othe r girls. "Ah ! Onl y a gir l know s th e sensatio n o f bein g crushy! " sh e wrot e in a n earl y entr y abou t Mis s White , he r firs t crush . Mario n experience d her attractio n t o thes e teacher s a s th e mos t intens e an d importan t par t of he r lif e i n thos e years . Sh e ordere d he r day s aroun d contact s wit h Miss Whit e an d practice d smal l ritual s t o expres s he r devotion . Mario n shared ho t chocolat e fro m he r thermo s ever y da y a t lunc h wit h Mis s White, an d sh e pinne d a tes t with Mis s White's handwritin g o n i t to he r underwaist.120 Sh e thought abou t th e woman constantly . For Marion , th e infatuatio n fel t fa r fro m trivial . Whe n som e o f he r girlfriends tol d th e teacher abou t th e crush, Miss White told Marion tha t it woul d soo n pass . "Well—there' s wher e she' s mistaken, " Mario n wrote defiantly . I n fact , he r affectio n fo r Mis s Whit e persiste d throug h junior hig h school . Thre e year s late r Mario n wrot e i n a lette r sh e neve r sent tha t "m y lov e fo r yo u i s n o littl e thing—it' s no t jus t a crush— a school-girl's affection ; i t is all of me ; it is the bigges t thing i n my life." 121 Her regar d fo r Mis s Whit e eventuall y change d int o a feelin g o f friend ship an d respect , bu t th e experienc e o f lov e for Mis s White continue d a s an importan t emotiona l backdro p t o Marion' s late r crushe s o n teachers . As long a s she continued t o direc t her affectio n towar d teachers , Marion create d lov e object s tha t wer e distan t an d easil y idolized. Beth Twiggar als o wante d he r crushe s o n a pedestal . Eve n whe n the y wer e class mates sh e ha d t o fee l tha t th e girl s wer e muc h olde r tha n sh e an d superior. Mario n kne w tha t he r teache r idol s coul d neve r b e a "chum " or a n equal . Even while she enumerated eac h teacher's outstandin g qual ities, sh e acknowledge d tha t he r crushe s originate d wit h he r ow n nee d to ador e someon e rathe r tha n wit h th e compellin g attraction s o f th e particular woman . Thi s fits wit h th e psychologica l literatur e o f th e da y which foun d tha t a n idealize d lov e fo r a n olde r perso n "i s almos t invar iably a part o f ever y girl's development." 122 Even idealize d lov e could mak e a girl vulnerable t o pain . If one o f he r

Flaming Youth 4

9

crushes failed , eve n unthinkingl y o r unknowingly , t o giv e Marion atten tion o r regard , sh e migh t fly int o rag e o r sin k int o despair . Earl y i n he r affection fo r Mis s Whit e sh e wrote , "Nothin g coul d hur t m e mor e tha n if she had a ba d opinio n o f me." Years later, afte r no t seein g Miss White for tw o months , Mario n ra n int o he r o n he r wal k home . Instea d o f walking wit h her , Mis s Whit e wen t o n b y herself . " I jus t hat e Mis s White! I' m ma d a t he r forever, " Mario n wrote . Mario n als o feare d tha t her affectio n fo r teacher s mad e he r disloya l t o he r mother . Lik e Bet h Twiggar, sh e describe d hersel f a s scare d tha t he r stron g feeling s migh t sweep he r awa y o r threate n t o overrid e he r self-direction. 123 In spit e o f th e danger s o f idealization , adoratio n fulfille d a number o f emotional need s fo r Marion . He r feeling s fo r Mis s Whit e an d other s allowed Mario n t o se e women i n a positive light . They provide d model s of femininit y tha t wer e distinc t fro m tha t provide d b y he r mother . Sh e studied thei r styl e an d hope d t o emulat e i t a s sh e gre w older . Sh e prob ably decide d t o g o t o colleg e becaus e o f he r intens e devotio n t o thes e women an d i n spit e o f he r father' s resistance . Clearl y sh e desire d th e youthful vigo r and feminin e attractivenes s tha t these women showe d her . Her relationships , althoug h one-sided , allowe d Mario n t o se e herself a s a valuabl e individual . Whe n Mis s Whit e o r late r crushe s returne d he r affection, sh e fel t thrillingl y goo d abou t herself . Th e affectio n sh e re ceived gav e he r th e nurturin g tha t he r mothe r di d no t provide . Crushe s also allowe d Mario n t o com e to term s with he r ow n life . As she admire d Miss White's nos e o r anothe r woman' s petit e statur e sh e deal t wit h dis appointment ove r he r ow n appearance. 124 Marion shape d he r sens e o f hersel f a s a n individua l an d a woma n through he r experience s o f affectio n fo r thes e teachers . B y studying var ious women' s way s o f bein g womanly an d successful , sh e could imagin e herself a s someon e i n thei r positions . Lik e he r heros , Marion eventuall y became a teacher . He r crushe s als o gav e Mario n a rich an d varie d emo tional life , on e tha t di d no t remai n entirel y secret . Mis s Whit e kne w o f Marion's affection , an d othe r teacher s mus t hav e see n Marion' s ardo r for the m a s a school-gir l phase . I n thei r understandin g response s an d affectionate interest , the y gav e Marion som e validation fo r he r emotion s and allowe d he r t o understan d he r emotion s mor e fully . Throug h he r crushes Mario n learne d wha t i t meant t o fee l passionatel y abou t others . Still, crushes o n teacher s preclude d mutualit y an d s o limited th e satisfac tions tha t Mario n coul d expec t fro m thes e relationships . As w e sa w wit h Bet h Twiggar , lov e fo r a gir l o r woma n di d no t

50 Flaming

Youth

preclude attractio n t o boys . A s a senio r i n hig h schoo l Mario n Taylo r reluctantly admitte d tha t sh e ha d "falle n hard " fo r a bo y i n on e o f he r classes. Later , i n college , sh e yearne d fo r th e physica l closenes s o f me n and "primitiv e love-making. " Ye t sh e stil l foun d wome n wh o excite d and attracte d her , an d sh e clearly distinguishe d he r affectio n fo r wome n from he r desir e fo r men . " I don' t se e ho w lov e fo r a ma n coul d b e hal f so thrilling," she wrote o f her attraction t o a woman professor a t college. "A ma n coul d neve r b e s o fa r off , an d mysterious , an d tantalizin g an d fascinating an d intellectua l an d spiritual." 125 A s with he r earlie r crushes , the college professor coul d easil y be idolized. For Marion, lovin g wome n generally mean t lovin g them a t a distance . Marion di d fin d on e youn g woman , however , who m sh e coul d bot h love an d b e clos e to . A s a colleg e studen t Mario n becam e friend s wit h Henrietta. Som e gap s i n Mario n Taylor' s diarie s mak e thei r friendshi p impossible t o full y analyze . Yet Marion recognize d tha t thi s relationshi p differed fro m others . I t allowe d he r t o liv e ou t he r affectio n i n a wa y that he r crushe s coul d neve r allow . " I fee l a volcan o withi n m e whic h bursts ever y onc e i n a while, " sh e wrote . "Jus t restlessnes s an d longin g for I don't kno w what . Bu t I am happ y to o wit h Henerey. " Mario n ha d always bee n reserved wit h people , and eve n though sh e sometimes wrot e of longin g fo r affectionat e caresses , sh e typicall y too k satisfactio n i n loving a t a distance . On e o f th e way s he r date s wit h boy s an d colleg e men differe d fro m he r crushe s wa s tha t sh e wanted t o pe t wit h th e me n but ha d littl e attractio n fo r thei r othe r qualitie s unti l sh e me t he r futur e husband. 126 With Henrietta , however , affectio n include d bot h lov e an d desire . " I get mor e excitemen t ou t o f showin g affection ! I neve r hav e unti l tha t other night , an d som e way, something—reserve I guess—gave way then , and I'v e wante d t o expres s m y affectio n fo r he r eve r since! " In fact , sh e felt compelle d t o sho w he r affection . " I hav e a craz y desir e t o kis s he r about ever y minute , an d I hu g he r al l th e tim e an d fee l s o thrille d an d excited." Fo r Marion, th e breakthrough cam e at a definite moment . Sud denly sh e discovere d a relationshi p tha t coul d combin e th e distinctiv e pleasures o f lov e and physica l closenes s with someon e whom sh e considered a friend . " I jus t lov e he r t o distraction , a s thrillingl y a s I use d t o love m y lady-loves , bu t mor e satisfyingly. " Th e onl y advantag e tha t a romance wit h a ma n migh t hav e ove r he r affectio n fo r Henriett a i s tha t it "woul d tickl e one' s vanity , an d excit e wit h th e novelt y o f it, " bu t b y contrast i t woul d "no t b e hal f a s satisfying , no t s o congenial , no t an y

Flaming Youth 5

1

more thrilling. " And , finally, love-makin g wit h a ma n coul d hav e a dif ferent conclusio n tha n wit h a woman—" I ca n lov e Henere y al l I want , and you' d hav e t o b e so careful wit h a man." 127 For Marion , th e combinatio n o f lov e an d desir e woul d retur n i n he r romance wit h th e ma n sh e married . I n hi m sh e foun d a congenia l com panion an d love r an d someon e whos e exoti c pas t an d persona l accom plishments allowe d fo r som e o f the same adoration tha t sh e had lavishe d as a hig h schoo l gir l o n he r teachers . Althoug h equatin g he r adolescen t crushes wit h he r matur e lov e ma y see m to o facile , ther e clearl y exis t some connections . A s a teen-age r sh e ha d writte n tha t th e ma n sh e wanted t o marr y (i f sh e married ) shoul d b e olde r tha n herself , someon e who coul d offe r he r intellectua l companionship. 128 He r husban d wa s just such a man . Conclusion Teen-agers an d youn g adult s o f th e century' s first decade s elaborate d a peer cultur e tha t allowe d the m t o shap e thei r ow n socia l an d sexua l practices. Th e pee r cultur e shape d personalitie s tha t woul d allo w me n and wome n t o dea l effectivel y wit h th e demand s o f a mass-market econ omy an d o f a societ y i n whic h th e individua l deal t wit h stranger s ever y day. Moder n societ y require d middle-clas s wome n t o adjus t t o rapidl y changing socia l situation s an d remak e themselve s accordin g t o th e inter ests an d demand s o f peers . We hav e see n Edyth e Weine r earnestl y read ing magazines fo r th e "truths " tha t woul d allo w he r t o achiev e popular ity, an d Bet h Twiggar applyin g th e col d cream s tha t promise d beauty . When personalit y succeeded—provin g tha t one , i n fact , ha d per sonality—popularity followed . Suddenl y a gir l foun d hersel f ou t o f th e stag lin e a t dance s an d dancin g wit h severa l partner s i n on e dance . Ye t popularity migh t prov e ephemeral . Boy s migh t talk ; a gir l migh t gai n a reputation a s bein g easy . The evidenc e o f popularit y might , i n fact , tur n into sham e a s i t di d fo r Bet h Twiggar . Or , lik e Rut h Raymond , a gir l might remai n i n th e sta g lin e an d despai r o f he r se x appea l an d he r personality. Humiliatio n an d self-doub t wer e the emotional compliment s to th e excitemen t o f popularity . The emotional live s of girls and young women als o grew through thei r relationships wit h othe r girl s an d youn g women . Crushe s migh t offe r a girl th e chanc e t o deepe n a friendship . Ofte n i t mean t adorin g a distan t girl o r woman . Throug h crushes , however , girl s fel t deepe r affection s

52 Flaming

Youth

than the y typicall y di d fo r boys . Onl y i n late r lif e woul d mos t wome n discover passion s fo r me n t o match thos e they had harbore d fo r teacher s or olde r girls . America n cultur e i n th e earl y twentiet h centur y taugh t women tha t romanti c lov e and companionat e marriag e woul d giv e them the intens e affectio n an d companionshi p tha t the y sometimes found wit h women friends , an d tha t thes e adul t relationship s woul d ope n a ful l lif e for them .

3

The Single Woman

In 191 9 eighteen-year-ol d Glady s Bel l bega n keepin g th e diarie s an d journals tha t woul d recor d he r emotiona l lif e fo r th e nex t sixt y years . She grew up on a farm i n southwestern Pennsylvani a an d b y age eighteen had earne d a teachin g certificate . Th e firs t fe w page s o f Bell' s firs t diar y show th e transitio n fro m adolescenc e t o lif e a s a n independen t woma n with almos t dizzyin g speed . Beginning in August, th e diary' s brie f entrie s report o n he r socia l lif e an d o n he r firs t teachin g experience . Withi n a month sh e ha d broke n u p wit h on e boyfrien d an d quickl y foun d an other. He r date s soun d lik e thos e o f hig h schoo l girls . "T o Indian a [Pennsylvania] an d th e Gran d t o se e 'Mickey. ' Fine ! The n t o th e 'cafe ' for sundaes . The y looke d sor t o f astonishe d t o se e Gla d i n Indiana. " A few day s late r Bel l went t o a danc e an d note d tha t sh e had " a joll y tim e with m y man y pals, " going o n t o lis t th e me n wh o ha d dance d wit h he r (including th e man sh e would eventuall y marry) . By November th e diar y assumes a mor e seriou s ton e a s Glady s worke d ou t a misunderstandin g with on e o f he r beaus , leadin g t o thei r agreemen t t o marry . He r fathe r gave hi s blessing . Th e nex t day , however , sh e wrote , "Change d m y mind." Thi s di d no t si t wel l wit h th e prospectiv e fiance , an d Glady s fel t both pressur e t o accep t thi s proposa l a s wel l a s a longin g t o enjo y he r freedom. "Mus t I soon choose o r ca n I d o a s other s a t eightee n an d a half, wal k onwar d alon e an d happy?" 1 Glady s woul d neve r b e alone , exactly, bu t sh e would pu t of f marriag e fo r almos t si x years . Women lik e Glady s Bel l wh o postpone d marriag e unti l man y year s after completin g hig h schoo l ofte n experience d a perio d o f lif e withou t clear boundarie s o r goals . Fo r man y wome n marriag e constitute d th e 53

54 The

Single Woman

primary, an d sometime s elusive , goal . Singl e women' s socia l activities , including thei r romanti c an d sexua l practices , attracte d th e interes t o f researchers. In 193 4 Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d hi s assistan t Lur a Ell a Beam explore d singlehoo d i n a volum e base d o n cas e historie s fro m Dickinson's decades-lon g gynecologica l practice . The Single Woman, along wit h th e predecessor volume , A Thousand Marriages, propose d t o answer th e questio n tha t Dickinso n ha d pose d i n hi s 192 0 addres s a s president o f th e America n Gynecologica l Society : "What , indeed , i s normal sex life? " Dickinso n an d Bea m foun d th e wome n i n thei r stud y t o be generall y health y an d well-adjusted . Comparin g a sampl e o f wome n born aroun d 190 0 wit h anothe r grou p bor n a generatio n earlier , Dick inson an d Bea m note d tha t al l the contemporar y singl e women "beyon d childhood ha d ha d heterosexua l experienc e eithe r emotiona l o r physica l or both, " ye t non e ha d venerea l diseases . A s compare d wit h th e earlie r group, the singl e women o f the 1920 s were far mor e likel y to be engaged and somewha t mor e likel y t o hav e los t thei r virginity . Althoug h wome n still sough t love , the y ha d als o com e t o believ e "tha t lov e i s no t con stant" an d i n disappointmen t ove r los t lov e the y learne d t o separat e sexual desir e fro m "emotion s an d beliefs." 2 The Single Woman presente d a pictur e o f health y an d triumphan t heterosexuality fo r America n women . Th e spinster s o f a n earlie r gener ation seeme d t o b e "disappearin g befor e th e flappe r o r th e younger gen eration, wh o ca n hav e fre e contac t righ t throug h life , with knowledg e o f birth contro l . . . " a s on e o f th e wome n ha d writte n t o Dickinson . Th e minority wh o becam e sexuall y activ e outsid e marriag e coul d contro l their fertilit y an d s o enjo y se x without fea r o f pregnancy . Singlehood , i n fact, seeme d a perio d o f preparatio n fo r ful l selfhoo d i n marriag e an d for th e ful l realizatio n o f sexuality . Homosexua l wome n als o cam e within th e cas e historie s studie d b y Dickinso n an d Beam , an d althoug h these wome n ha d healt h an d succes s i n lif e t o matc h heterosexua l women, the y seeme d mor e o f a throwbac k t o a n earlie r perio d whe n a larger proportio n o f professiona l wome n remaine d unmarrie d an d ofte n found intimat e companionshi p amon g othe r women . Fo r wome n wh o remained singl e throug h thei r lives , as wel l a s fo r wome n wh o married , the earl y year s o f independenc e i n colleg e an d wor k becam e a n impor tant tim e o f maturin g fro m yout h int o ful l womanhood. 3 As suggeste d b y th e exampl e o f Glady s Bell , Dickinso n an d Beam' s celebration o f femal e heterosexualit y overlooke d comple x emotiona l de -

The Single Woman 5

5

velopments i n th e live s o f youn g women . Th e transitio n fro m yout h t o adulthood, represente d i n choice s abou t lov e an d career , frequentl y cre ated persona l conflict . Th e passag e becam e eve n mor e complicate d an d confusing fo r moder n yout h whos e margina l statu s migh t exten d fo r years an d whos e cultur e offere d skill s fo r gainin g socia l acceptanc e bu t not fo r self-affirmation . Th e emotiona l experienc e o f middle-clas s women ofte n contraste d sharpl y wit h widel y accepte d emotiona l ideals . Cinema an d popula r fictio n offere d wome n narrative s o f romance , enhanced b y desire , fulfillin g an d transformin g thei r lives . Althoug h women generall y accepte d thes e ideals , they als o experience d feeling s o f ambivalence abou t love , men , marriage , an d desire . Whe n lov e di d arrive, i t ofte n resolve d thes e feeling s o f ambivalence—a t leas t temporarily—but i t rarel y appeare d a s a n overpowerin g an d unambig uous experience . Instead , lov e seeme d lik e anothe r confusin g experienc e in th e live s o f singl e women , eve n i f the y believe d i t wa s th e experienc e that woul d transfor m al l others . Singlehood Just a s adolescenc e i n th e 1920 s coul d exten d fro m junio r hig h schoo l into the college years, singlehood include d wome n bot h studyin g beyon d high schoo l an d working . Afte r the y lef t hig h school , wome n face d im portant decision s abou t thei r lifecourse . Colleg e an d wor k attracte d a growing majorit y o f middle-clas s wome n b y th e earl y decade s o f th e twentieth century. 4 Al l o f th e wome n whos e persona l paper s w e hav e examined wen t t o colleg e o r worke d befor e marriage , i f the y marrie d a t all. These years becam e a n intermediat e an d indeterminan t stag e beyon d adolescence whe n middle-clas s wome n achieve d greate r independenc e from thei r familie s an d move d towar d self-definition s fo r thei r adul t lives. The flappe r wa s th e mos t commo n imag e o f singl e wome n i n th e 1920s. Accordin g t o Zeld a Fitzgerald , onc e a youn g woma n discovere d that " 'boy s do danc e mos t wit h th e girl s they kis s most,' " sh e "bobbe d her hair , put o n he r choices t pai r o f earring s an d a great dea l o f audacit y and rouge , an d wen t int o th e battle." 5 Th e battl e her e referre d t o th e public recreation s an d heterosexua l convivialit y tha t youn g women too k up with delight . The flappe r seeme d s o taken wit h he r ne w sexua l equal ity wit h men , an d s o wrappe d u p i n he r lif e o f pleasure , tha t sh e coul d

5 6 The

Single Woman

hardly paus e ove r problem s o f identity . The flappe r image , however, ca n obscure th e emotiona l turmoi l tha t youn g wome n face d durin g thei r years o f singlehood. 6 For singl e wome n ou t o f hig h schoo l an d subjec t t o th e competin g attractions o f career , marriage , friendship , an d independence , decision s about th e futur e ofte n prove d difficult . A fundamenta l issu e fo r self definition wa s th e questio n o f marriage—whethe r o r no t t o marr y and , if so , t o whom . Popula r image s presente d romanti c lov e an d desir e a s forces shapin g women int o fully integrated—an d married—persons . Yet the feeling s o f competenc e an d independenc e tha t wome n gaine d fro m college an d wor k coul d leav e the m wit h a sens e o f th e limit s o f marrie d life. Eve n desire , whic h seeme d t o promis e a n untouche d pat h t o love , offered onl y ambiguou s guidanc e t o wome n comin g o f ag e i n th e earl y decades o f th e century . Within th e middl e class , distinction s o f wealt h an d positio n mad e striking differences i n th e meaning s an d form s o f singlehood . Fo r Sara h Bradley i n Bosto n an d Ilk a Chas e i n Ne w York , th e yea r followin g hig h school mean t a roun d o f socia l event s a s debutantes . Thei r familie s viewed work , an d eve n college , a s goal s fo r wome n o f lowe r socia l standing. Afte r thei r mandator y year , however , Sara h Bradle y an d Ilk a Chase lef t th e socia l roun d wit h som e relief—Bradle y t o d o voluntee r war wor k an d the n t o g o t o Radcliff e College , Chas e t o becom e a n actress. Anothe r wealth y middle-clas s diarist , Elizabet h Yates , recorde d her parents ' expectatio n tha t he r olde r siste r woul d com e ou t a s a debu tante durin g th e yea r followin g colleg e rathe r tha n accep t a positio n a s an instructo r a t Smit h College . Elizabeth watche d i n dismay a s her siste r complied wit h parenta l pressure s t o mee t socia l responsibilitie s rathe r than tak e work tha t sh e wanted bu t di d not need. Elizabeth, on the othe r hand, woul d ultimatel y hol d ou t agains t he r parents ' plans . Sh e neve r became a debutante, an d rathe r tha n follo w he r siste r to Smith , she spent a yea r a t a boardin g schoo l afte r hig h schoo l an d followe d he r drea m o f becoming a writer. 7 By th e 1920 s colleg e wa s becomin g a fa r mor e commo n goa l fo r young women , whethe r fro m th e upper middl e class or furthe r dow n th e social scale . Those wit h colleg e education s ha d grow n fro m 4 percent o f the population i n 190 0 to 1 2 percent b y 1930 . By 1938 , 1 percent o f th e entire populatio n o f th e countr y wa s currentl y enrolle d i n college . Th e numbers o f wome n enrolle d i n colleg e ha d grow n muc h faste r tha n th e college populatio n a s a whole, with wome n makin g u p 2 1 percent o f th e

The Single Woman 5

7

college populatio n i n 187 0 bu t 47. 3 percen t i n 1920 . Man y o f th e women enterin g college in the 1920 s came from familie s i n which colleg e had alread y becom e a tradition . Ann e Morrow , fro m a wealth y family , attended Smith , a s he r mothe r an d olde r siste r ha d done . Othe r wome n attended colleg e i n spit e o f limite d famil y support . Glady s Bel l too k a year of f fro m teachin g i n rura l Pennsylvani a t o atten d Grov e Cit y Col lege fro m 192 2 t o 1923 . An n Mari e Low , whos e famil y struggle d t o maintain thei r far m i n th e Nort h Dakot a dus t bowl , worke d a t he r school librar y an d durin g th e summer s s o she could atten d colleg e in th e midst o f th e Depression. 8 The college years extended an d deepene d young women's involvemen t in th e pee r culture . Wit h college , man y youn g wome n live d awa y fro m home. This , combine d wit h th e intellectua l demand s o f study , encour aged youn g wome n t o mov e towar d independenc e fro m thei r families . In her journal, Glady s Hasty reflected i n 192 2 how her months a t college had begu n t o affec t he r life . "W e wor k an d pla y togethe r al l day, an d a t night w e d o no t g o hom e t o tal k ove r wit h olde r peopl e wha t ha s hap pened; w e g o bac k t o ou r dormitorie s wher e w e ar e associate d wit h n o one wh o i s olde r tha n w e are , an d wrestl e wit h ou r problem s togethe r or alone." 9 Marth a Lavell , wh o rea d avidl y a s a teenager , onl y consid ered hersel f t o hav e begu n readin g i n earnes t i n college . Ne w idea s an d possibilities fo r though t swep t he r away , an d sh e soo n foun d hersel f rejecting organize d religio n an d arguin g abou t Go d wit h he r grand mother: "Evolutio n i s the basi s o f m y belief : therefore n o Adam an d Ev e for me." 10 The colleg e year s ma y inspir e youn g wome n wit h ne w possibilitie s i n thought, a s the y di d fo r Marth a Lavell , o r wit h ne w opportunities . Gladys Hasty foun d he r freshma n yea r a t Bate s College "almos t unbear ably exciting. " Sh e hoped tha t Bate s wome n woul d becom e mor e activ e in politic s "an d i n civi c improvement s o f al l kinds. " Fo r mos t colleg e women, th e attractio n o f colleg e accompanie d trainin g fo r som e voca tion. B y th e lat e nineteent h century , colleg e attendanc e fo r wome n ha d grown alon g wit h th e number s o f wome n enterin g professions . Colleg e education stil l resulted i n jobs as teachers fo r man y women, bu t growin g numbers o f wome n entere d suc h traditiona l mal e bastion s a s la w an d medicine in the early twentieth centur y an d the y dominated th e new field of socia l work . Durin g th e 1920s , women earne d abou t one-thir d o f al l graduate degree s awarded. 11 Clara Savage' s wor k a s a reporte r fo r th e New York Evening Post

58 The

Single Woman

gives a sens e o f th e variet y o f women' s wor k i n th e year s befor e Worl d War I . "Spen t th e mornin g wit h on e Mis s Finne y visitin g Iris h scru b women o n th e Wes t Side, " Savag e wrot e i n 1914 . "I t ma y b e th e wa y to d o charit y bu t I hav e grea t doubts . I fel t s o embarrasse d to-da y be cause sh e aske d s o man y persona l question s o f th e poo r Poor. " Durin g that sam e yea r sh e interviewe d France s Perkins , wh o wa s the n investi gating workplac e safety , an d attende d a lectur e b y feminist leade r Char lotte Perkin s Gilma n wh o mad e Savag e "furious" .Sh e als o me t labo r leader Mothe r Jone s an d interviewe d peac e activis t Lillia n Wald , socia l scientists an d administrator s Katherin e Bemen t Davi s an d S . Josephin e Baker, an d Ann a Howar d Shaw , hea d o f th e Nationa l America n Woman's Suffrag e Associatio n (NAWSA) . Savage , wh o i n 191 5 too k over a s th e hea d o f th e pres s sectio n fo r NAWSA , fel t hersel f par t o f a wider women' s struggl e fo r a mor e jus t societ y an d mor e opportunit y for women. 12 Even Clar a Savage , wit h he r bus y schedule , sometime s fel t lonely . After a lon g Saturda y o f wor k i n earl y 1914 , sh e la y o n th e couc h i n her Manhatta n apartmen t feelin g tire d "an d lonesome for—oh ! Well , merely fo r a house , husban d an d baby ! Wan t the m awfully!" 13 B y th e 1920s, marriag e woul d colo r al l o f youn g women' s choice s durin g thei r years o f singlehood . Fro m th e 1870 s unti l abou t 1920 , 40 t o 6 0 percen t of colleg e wome n neve r married . A t elit e women' s college s lik e Smith , Wellesley, an d Vassa r nea r th e tur n o f th e century , onl y abou t one fourth o f th e graduate s married . B y the 1920s , however , neithe r colleg e nor wor k fo r wome n represente d a choic e agains t marriage . A s earl y a s the 1919-192 3 period , 8 0 t o 9 0 percen t o f th e graduate s o f th e to p women's college s married . Man y college s joine d popula r periodical s i n praising marriag e an d encouragin g it . Advertiser s presente d marriag e a s a career , an d college s offere d ne w curricul a t o prepar e wome n fo r th e wifely dutie s a s hostess , dietician , purchasin g agent , an d nurse . Vassa r established it s Institut e o f Euthenic s t o brin g togethe r socia l an d natura l sciences t o solv e th e problem s o f famil y an d chil d care , t o incorporat e "into th e consciousnes s o f ever y colleg e woman " th e value s o f scientifi c parenthood. A stud y o f colleg e se x writte n i n th e 1930 s note d tha t "competition fo r date s i s kee n an d th e sociall y timi d suffe r accord ingly." Sororitie s helpe d b y stressin g th e socia l skill s neede d t o captur e and kee p a husband . I n reflectin g o n he r year s a t colleg e i n th e 1920s , Pearl Buc k recalle d tha t "N o gir l though t i t possibl e tha t sh e migh t no t marry." 14

The Single Woman 5

9

3.1 A n office o f the New York Evening Post when Clar a Savag e worked there. Schlesinger Library, Radcliffe College .

Among th e wome n whos e paper s w e hav e studied , th e bes t demo graphic predicto r o f marriag e o r lifetim e singlehoo d i s dat e o f birth . Only a minority o f thes e women chos e lif e without marriage , although a higher percentag e mad e thi s choic e tha n fo r th e America n populatio n a s a whole . Bu t o f wome n bor n befor e 1900 , on e quarte r remaine d single , while fo r thos e bor n i n 190 0 o r later , onl y on e i n seve n neve r married . The qualit y o f th e decisio n fo r singlehoo d ma y hav e als o differe d fo r th e two groups . Devotio n t o a career , especiall y on e embedde d i n reform , offered a n attractiv e choic e fo r wome n i n th e lat e nineteent h an d earl y twentieth centuries . The y coul d expec t t o wor k an d liv e wit h othe r women, committe d reformer s lik e themselves . Live s o f servic e seeme d more compellin g alternative s tha n th e privat e satisfaction s o f hom e an d family. B y the 1910s , however , servic e an d caree r seeme d t o Clar a Sav age only abou t equa l t o marriag e i n it s appeal .

6o The

Single Woman Romance

By th e 1920s , popula r cultur e presente d singl e wome n a s committe d t o a life-transformin g struggl e t o fin d an d captur e th e righ t ma n t o marry . Elinor Gly n offere d chapter s i n The Philosophy of Love o n th e bes t means fo r wome n t o attrac t an d ensnar e th e ma n o f thei r choice . Ann e Hirst, a columnis t fo r th e New York Post an d th e Philadelphi a Record, wrote a n entir e book , Get Your Man — and Hold Him. Sh e encourage d young wome n t o mak e th e mos t o f thei r persona l attributes , "b e the y face, figure o r menta l equipment. " "Yo u mus t b e distinctively somethin g in orde r t o brin g tha t handsom e youn g ma n yo u cove t acros s th e roo m to you r side." 15 Lik e Glyn , Hirs t imagine d a fierce competitio n amon g women t o captur e th e mos t desirabl e men . Althoug h bot h writer s urge d women t o examin e th e fault s o f thei r potentia l mates , the y too k fo r granted tha t mos t women' s ambitio n focuse d o n snarin g a man . For wome n a t th e openin g o f th e moder n era , finding th e righ t ma n to marr y mean t finding love . Eugenics advocat e Pau l Popenoe warne d i n his marriag e advic e manua l agains t th e "Romanti c Platform. " I n thi s scheme, lov e appear s a t a sudde n "psychologica l moment, " "look s yo u in th e eye , an d the n it is on." Whe n lov e appears , everythin g els e be comes secondar y a t best . An d i f thi s mysteriou s experienc e passe s a s suddenly a s i t appeared , anothe r wil l tak e it s place a s the suprem e expe rience of life. Popenoe dismisse d thi s concept o f love as "infantile philan derings." 16 B y the 1920s , however, th e romanti c platfor m ha d becom e a staple o f th e popula r media . Wherea s som e narrative s o f lov e migh t depart fro m th e lov e at first sigh t followed b y complications followe d b y marriage scenario , bot h movie s an d popula r literatur e almos t alway s presented lov e a s th e mos t importan t experienc e o f a n individual' s lif e and th e sourc e o f persona l transformation . One large-scal e stud y o f th e message s offere d b y movie s i n th e 1920 s and 1930 s foun d tha t se x an d lov e wer e th e mai n theme s o f 5 7 percen t of movie s i n 192 0 an d abou t hal f o f movie s i n 1925 . I n mor e tha n a third o f films analyzed , lov e mean t a n experienc e o f attractio n whe n th e couples first meet , an d i n anothe r quarte r o f th e films lov e follow s o n the secon d o r thir d meeting . Wha t th e investigator s terme d "Lov e a s a growth" appeare d i n onl y 5 percent o f movies . Th e movies , conclude d the study , portray lov e within " a Cinderell a conceptio n o f acquaintance ship." 17 The plot o f th e movi e "ft " revolve s aroun d th e concept tha t a woma n

The Single Woman 61 and a ma n wil l kno w a t first meetin g tha t the y ar e mean t fo r on e an other. Durin g th e first scene s o f th e movie , Clar a Bow' s character , Bett y Lou, ha s t o maneuve r he r wa y int o th e pat h o f departmen t stor e hei r Cyrus Waltha m jus t s o th e tw o ca n meet . Onc e the y do , thei r romanc e begins an d i n what remain s o f th e movie' s seventy-tw o minute s th e cou ple onl y ha s misunderstanding s abou t se x an d moralit y an d overcomin g class differences . Elino r Glyn , th e movie' s write r an d th e creato r o f th e concept "it, " believe d tha t lov e "i s cause d b y som e attractin g vibration s emanating fro m th e tw o participants. " Lov e depends "no t o n th e will of the individual , bu t upo n wha t attractin g powe r i s i n th e othe r person. " She describe d "it " a s a "nameles s charm , wit h a stron g magnetism, " i n other word s a surplu s o f th e "attractin g vibrations." 18 Fo r peopl e wh o possessed "it, " lov e at first sigh t would mak e perfec t sense . Although movie s ha d a limite d numbe r o f reel s i n whic h t o conclud e stories o f romance , novel s o f th e perio d coul d develo p storie s o f lov e a t greater lengt h an d wit h mor e subtlety . Mos t o f the popular novel s of th e 1920s relie d o n proven formula s fo r romance . Advertisers, who took th e popularity o f romance i n fiction, magazines , and movie s as a sure insigh t into th e mentalit y o f th e "matine e crowd, " wrot e scar e cop y t o matc h this perceptio n o f life , with romanc e los t t o fallin g socks , bad breath , o r blemished skin. 19 Althoug h th e psychologica l momen t o f romanti c lov e might b e beyon d thei r control , usin g th e righ t produc t coul d guarante e that wome n didn' t mis s those opportunitie s tha t appeared . Young wome n too k th e romanti c ideal s o f th e cultur e seriously . Aza lia Pee t gre w u p i n a worl d stil l Victorian . Sh e wa s twenty-si x i n 191 4 when sh e wrote, "An d stil l the Princ e lingers. " " I wish h e would come, " she wrot e tw o year s late r an d added , " I fee l a s i f I ha d bee n a we e bi t robbed becaus e thi s experienc e ha s bee n denie d me." 20 Fou r year s late r Elizabeth Yate s would rea d th e descriptio n tha t he r siste r ha d writte n o f her tal l an d tende r "well-beloved: " "Whe n w e meet , ou r eye s wil l sa y more tha n ou r lips , an d w e wil l kno w tha t w e wer e mean t fo r eac h other." Whe n Yate s discussed he r ow n idea s abou t love , she drew on th e same cultura l stor e he r siste r ha d used . Eac h person , alone , i s onl y hal f of a whole personality , sh e wrote, "an d th e whole reaso n fo r livin g is to find th e othe r hal f an d mak e a whole." 21 Martha Lavell , a student a t th e University o f Minnesot a i n 1928 , quoted fro m son g lyric s to expres s he r feelings abou t lov e an d he r hop e fo r a ma n wh o woul d find her . "7 s i t so terrible fo r m e to drea m suc h things? " sh e wondered. 22 When the y looke d forwar d t o love , women believe d tha t i t could no t

6z The

Single Woman

be "merel y physical, " a s Jan e Sherma n wrote . O f course , sh e believed , "there mus t b e bodil y attraction , th e littl e sillines s an d al l whic h i s jus t the openin g o f a doo r t o a real an d lastin g lov e which i s deeper tha n th e first stage. " A fe w month s late r sh e repeate d tha t lov e "musn' t b e flippant, an d oh ! I t must b e companionshi p idealize d t o love." 23 In discuss ing lov e wit h tw o friend s a t college , Rut h Raymon d foun d the m dis agreeing ove r th e relativ e importanc e o f th e spiritua l an d physica l i n love. " I sai d I didn' t kno w muc h abou t physica l o r spiritual , tha t I thought yo u jus t looke d a t a bo y an d kne w h e wa s righ t fo r you , an d stuck." Sh e concluded tha t lov e "wa s a sor t o f fate . I t go t yo u stuck." 24 She might hav e bee n writin g advertisin g cop y fo r th e movi e "It." Even thoug h th e live s o f wome n ofte n admitte d t o mor e dram a tha n Hollywood's scriptwriter s coul d drea m up , the y generall y experience d love a s les s dramati c an d les s sudde n tha n calle d fo r i n scripts . I n he r months o f acquaintanc e wit h autho r Joh n Marquand , Hele n Howe , a n actress i n he r lat e twenties , fel t a growin g sympath y an d attractio n fo r the older , marrie d ma n base d o n commo n interest s an d mutua l admira tion. "I n thos e day s Joh n simpl y filled a plac e o n m y horizo n o f new found olde r brother—onl y kinde r an d mor e encouragin g t o m e abou t my wor k tha n eithe r o f m y brother s woul d eve r hav e though t o f be ing." 25 In betwee n writin g t o her mothe r abou t he r work wit h muralist Dieg o Rivera, lon e Robinso n include d th e informatio n tha t sh e ha d me t a n American workin g i n Mexic o a s burea u chie f fo r Tass , th e Sovie t new s agency. Later , a littl e guiltily , sh e admits , " I hav e a feelin g tha t I' m falling i n lov e with Joe." Their romanc e ha d al l the making s o f a Holly wood comed y o r perhap s a sp y movie . " I lik e bes t th e day s whe n h e spends th e whole lunc h hou r composin g poem s t o m e on th e bac k o f th e menu," Robinso n wrot e home . But Joe rejecte d suc h bourgeoi s product s as poetr y an d prett y dresse s an d chide d lon e whe n sh e wor e ribbon s o r silk. Sinc e lon e kne w Ma x Eastman , Joe—o r hi s superiors—assume d that sh e knew somethin g abou t Trotsky' s whereabouts . A t leas t he kep t asking abou t Trotsky . On e evenin g whe n sh e visited Joe an d hi s friends , everyone stoppe d talkin g whe n sh e steppe d int o th e room . "I t i s reall y very difficul t bein g i n love with a Communist, " sh e admitted. 26 In les s exoti c surrounding s seventeen-year-ol d Glady s Hast y discov ered he r psychologica l momen t wit h a distan t cousi n wh o too k he r an d her aun t t o a Main e beach-sid e resor t fo r dinne r an d dancing . Sh e danced th e tang o wit h Pau l an d tha t nigh t a t Aun t Mollie' s sh e couldn' t

The Single Woman 63 sleep. "I t mus t b e love , I thought , becaus e I ha d neve r fel t lik e thi s before." Sh e fel t guilt y abou t he r passio n fo r a marrie d ma n an d man aged t o avoi d Pau l fo r th e res t o f th e summer . Bu t sh e worrie d tha t i f she reall y love d hi m sh e migh t neve r hav e suc h feeling s again . Sh e lef t for colleg e i n th e fal l stil l hopin g "more than anything t o fee l abou t a man wh o isn' t marrie d th e way I felt abou t Paul , las t summer. " Perhap s her cousin' s unattainabl e statu s ha d give n hi m th e adde d attractio n i n Gladys Hasty' s imaginatio n t o make he r psychological momen t possible . It fulfille d a n adolescen t girl' s imag e o f lov e a t first meeting , ye t i n he r own min d he r cousi n wa s ou t o f reach . When sh e me t a youn g ma n a t colleg e wh o attracte d her , Glady s found he r feeling s fa r les s distinctiv e an d fa r mor e difficul t t o under stand. Whe n sh e talked wit h he r boyfriend , Herber t Carroll , he "alway s understands wha t I mea n tha t I don' t say " an d sh e realize d tha t sh e knew wha t h e meant eve n when h e didn' t sa y it. "The n I just felt—oh, I can't explai n that either. " A s sh e gre w close r t o Herber t i n th e month s that followe d sh e wante d t o understan d bette r wha t exactl y sh e fel t fo r him. Sh e listene d t o othe r girl s an d searche d fo r clue s i n Russia n novel s and Frenc h plays . "Ma n o r woman, " thes e source s seeme d t o agree , "i f you wer e i n love , yo u kne w it . Bu t ho w di d you?" 27 Fo r Hasty , th e assurance onl y cam e afte r month s o f questioning , an d i t cam e onl y slowly a s sh e watche d th e warmt h tha t he r parent s fel t fo r on e anothe r after man y decade s o f marriage , a s she saw th e eas y sympath y tha t Her bert an d he r fathe r forme d wit h on e anothe r whe n h e visite d he r home , and a s he continued t o expres s hi s steadfas t regar d fo r her . A t leas t par t of th e romanti c platfor m faile d fo r Glady s Hasty . Lov e didn' t appea r a t first sight , a s sh e believe d i t ha d fo r Paul , an d sh e didn' t recogniz e i t instantly whe n i t di d appear . Even whe n experienc e faile d t o matc h th e script , th e narrativ e o f ro mantic lov e migh t shap e th e wa y tha t wome n though t abou t thei r rela tionships. Doroth y Thompson , Berli n corresponden t fo r th e New York Herald Tribune, me t novelis t Sinclai r Lewi s i n 192 7 shortl y afte r he r divorce. Almost immediatel y h e asked he r t o marr y hi m an d h e persiste d in courtin g Thompso n i n th e month s tha t followed . Sinclai r Lewi s "oc cupies m y mind, " Thompso n wrot e tw o month s later ; "h e an d h e alon e intervenes i n m y dream s a t nigh t an d i s th e sol e objec t o f m y day dreams." Lik e he r teen-age d contemporar y Jan e Sherman , Thompso n believed that sh e could hav e a complete life only with on e other person — "what I want i s to find tha t perso n an d buil d a life with hi m which shal l

64 The

Single Woman

have breadth , depth , creativ e quality , dignity , beaut y an d inne r loy alty." 28 In spit e o f th e powe r o f th e cultura l idea l o f romance , unmarrie d middle-class wome n ofte n sa w through th e romantic platform . " Tailin g in love'—wha t doe s tha t mean[?] " wondered musicia n Doroth y Smith . "Not jus t a slee k youn g ma n courtin g a fluff y youn g lad y & bot h o f a proper age. " The woma n remain s a "cucumber " unti l "plop , one falls i n love." Tha t hardl y matche d Smith' s experienc e o f "dizz y aggression s & retrogressions." Whe n a n olde r an d unattractiv e ma n aske d i f sh e like d to fal l i n love , Emily Tapscott Clar k tol d hi m tha t sh e "hate d it , becaus e it upse t m e horribly. " Hele n Howe , wh o ha d followe d he r passio n fo r John Marquan d int o a n affai r tha t he r famil y foun d sordid , waite d through hi s divorc e fro m hi s wife an d the n face d hi s driftin g awa y fro m her. Sh e fel t devastate d whe n sh e hear d o f hi s engagemen t t o someon e else a t a dinne r party . Th e prospec t o f finding a young ma n t o complet e her lif e attracte d Rut h Raymon d o n som e days , althoug h o n othe r day s she believe d me n wer e " a snar e an d a delusion " an d planne d t o carr y insecticide t o slaughte r an y o f th e "anxiou s earthworms " sh e met . An n Marie Lo w date d a n olde r ma n fo r year s befor e recognizin g ho w impos sible lif e wit h hi m woul d become . Whe n sh e looke d a t hi s Joh n Barry more profil e an d wav y hair , sh e didn' t se e he r princ e bu t " a tombston e on whic h i s written th e epitap h o f dea d dreams." 29 Just a s Gladys Hasty struggle d ove r the questio n o f whether sh e really loved Herber t Carrol l o r not , man y othe r wome n foun d themselve s un able to choose among suitors . Winifred Willi s felt draw n t o both Bil l and Bub befor e finally marryin g Tommy. 30 Jan e Sherman , a s w e sa w i n th e last chapter , collecte d marriag e proposal s i n virtuall y ever y sto p o n th e Denishawn tou r o f th e Fa r East . Th e datin g syste m tha t mad e acquain tance wit h man y youn g me n possibl e als o mad e knowin g an y o f thos e men wel l relativel y difficult . Wome n migh t find themselve s i n the role of consumers, choosin g amon g severa l me n o n th e basi s o f seemingl y mar ginal differences . Young wome n struggle d wit h thei r ow n feeling s an d thei r culture' s messages whe n the y experience d desir e tha t coul d no t fit th e cultura l script. " I believ e that mor e tha n hal f th e misery i n the world come s fro m mistaken assumption s abou t love, " Viola Whit e wrot e i n he r diary . Sh e found hersel f repeatedl y i n lov e wit h wome n an d me n who m sh e coul d not approach , suc h a s a marrie d professo r a t he r graduat e school , or , such a s Beatrice , who "regard s m e with gratitud e whe n I let he r alone. "

The Single Woman 6

5

Yet Whit e neve r questione d th e valu e o f he r lov e fo r Beatrice . "I t liber ates one' s spiri t fro m th e mollus k shel l o f identity , an d i t give s intens e meaning t o th e mos t trivia l incident . Yo u ma y thereafte r b e tormente d or ashamed , bu t yo u ar e neve r bored. " A s Zelda Fitzgeral d wrot e t o he r husband afte r year s o f struggle , "lov e i s bitter an d al l there is." 31 Clara Savage , whose desir e for marriag e predispose d he r to accept th e cultural imag e o f romance , foun d instea d tha t he r relation s wit h me n were a confusin g mixtur e o f affection , regard , an d desire . A t th e en d o f one relationshi p he r bea u tol d he r tha t h e didn' t lov e he r an d tha t sh e didn't lov e hi m " 'enough. ' " Sh e accepte d hi s pronouncemen t bu t couldn't slee p tha t night : "ther e wa s somethin g lik e the blad e o f a razo r in m y ches t an d th e uppe r edg e o f i t kep t movin g & cuttin g a littl e a s i t moved. Havin g tear s insid e o f yo u make s it . An d I thot o f ho w a goo d many me n hav e foun d m e attractiv e physically , an d ho w n o ma n ha s ever reall y love d me. " In the sam e diary , sh e wrote that "S o much o f th e happiness i n bein g i n lov e come s fro m lookin g forwar d t o something . I t seems a s thoug h tha t wer e th e bigges t elemen t i n it . Onc e yo u tak e thi s away, th e botto m drop s ou t o f everything." 32 In a cultur e tha t promise d happines s an d meanin g throug h th e expe rience o f love , the greates t threa t o f emotiona l distres s cam e fro m bein g jilted. Ann e Hirs t include d a chapte r fo r wome n whos e boyfriend s o r fiances ha d abandone d them , providin g a variet y o f tactic s t o hel p women surviv e an d recove r fro m thei r mistreatment . Fiv e years after he r own crisi s o f los t lov e Clar a Savag e Littledale would offe r he r counsel t o those wit h broke n heart s i n Good Housekeeping. Fac e the situation , sh e advised, tr y t o understan d it , realiz e tha t thi s doe s no t mea n yo u ar e unlovable, chang e you r surrounding s i f possible . Sh e wrot e ou t o f he r own experienc e o f feelin g th e piercin g pai n fro m unshe d tears . But afte r advising youn g wome n t o tak e contro l o f thei r emotiona l lives , she con cluded he r advic e with a plank fro m th e romanti c platform—fal l i n love again.33 The confusion tha t young women experience d ove r romance and mar riage seem s o n th e surfac e t o contradic t th e tren d towar d heterosexua l conviviality i n adolescence . That datin g coul d becom e courtship appear s clear fro m th e tren d towar d th e convergenc e o f th e dat e o f graduatio n from hig h schoo l an d th e marriag e ag e fo r women . Girl s i n hig h schoo l met man y boy s i n th e datin g syste m an d mor e an d mor e frequentl y on e of thos e boy s wa s "th e one, " tha t is , th e on e the y married . A n advic e manual fo r colleg e student s recommende d tha t i f youn g peopl e hav e

66 The

Single Woman

"several friend s o f th e opposit e sex " simpl e mathematic s woul d kee p them fro m makin g hast y an d wrongheade d decision s abou t marriage . Popular autho r Floy d Del l believe d tha t datin g serve d biology . Men had evolved t o compete, women t o choose. 34 Yet eve n whe n wome n accepte d th e rituals o f the dating system s and the assumption s o f the romantic platform , the y stil l experienced anxiet y and confusio n a s they mad e decision s abou t marriag e an d career. Mid dle-class wome n comin g o f ag e in the 1910 s and 1920 s coul d onl y lay claim t o a tentative self . They frequentl y lacke d confidenc e i n their abil ity t o liv e independen t an d productiv e live s an d ha d littl e relianc e o n their abilit y t o mak e decision s abou t marriage . Azali a Peet , who woul d ultimately commi t he r lif e t o servic e a s a missionary , stil l wondere d i n her lat e twentie s wha t "al l embracing ideal " shoul d shap e her life. "I s a life devoted to mere helpfulnes s t o others, disregarding self, the real goal? . . . I s the well rounde d developmen t o f the artistic natur e no t a bigger , broader mor e comprehensiv e ideal?" 35 Peet' s concer n ove r th e development o f th e sel f reflecte d widesprea d doubt s i n earl y twentieth-centur y culture ove r th e cor e meanin g o f self . Unambivalen t value s seeme d t o disappear alon g with th e local economies an d "island communities " tha t gave way to the mass market and consumerism in late nineteenth-centur y America. A t the sam e tim e religio n assume d les s tim e an d passio n an d the symbol s o f religio n hel d les s compellin g meaning s fo r middle-clas s Americans.36 The cultural ideal s that too k th e place of religion an d communal value s i n shapin g th e self—consumerism , romance , eve n socia l reform—held ou t the hope tha t the y coul d mak e individual s fee l whole . "Nothing bu t a grea t lov e o r a grea t caus e wil l eve r concentrat e al l the atoms an d mak e m e a weapo n o f efficien t service, " wrot e Viol a Whit e in 1926. 37 Fo r som e women , lov e an d marriag e di d mea n a movemen t toward wholeness . For others, the self becam e less tentative as they practiced thei r profession s o r gaine d othe r experience s o f competenc e an d independence. Thei r growin g sens e o f self , however , migh t mak e th e decision fo r marriage see m more lik e a loss than a gain . Because young wome n typicall y remaine d dependen t o n their familie s until afte r college , the y coul d rarel y se e themselves a s fully competent . Some wome n seeme d unabl e eve n t o tak e th e mos t elementar y step s toward confiden t self-assurance . Ann e Morrow , wh o followe d he r mother an d sister t o Smit h College , struggle d wit h he r slowness o n tests and he r inability t o believ e i n herself. She apologized t o her mother fo r telling he r abou t a succes s i n on e o f he r classes , an d whe n sh e won a

The Single Woman 6j school literar y awar d sh e went fro m feelin g "dazed " wit h happines s to a conviction tha t sh e didn' t reall y deserv e th e prize . W e hav e see n tha t Elizabeth Yates' s siste r turne d dow n a n offe r o f employmen t fro m Smit h on he r parents ' insistence . Later , whe n sh e fel l i n lov e wit h a poore r man, he r parent s agai n intervene d an d squelche d th e match. 38 Whereas th e wealt h an d clas s expectation s o f thei r familie s handi capped bot h Yate s an d Morro w i n claimin g independen t live s an d con fident selves , women fro m sharpl y differen t background s als o felt tha t a s single wome n the y coul d clai m onl y tentativ e o r provisiona l identities . Ann Mari e Low , who gre w u p o n a far m durin g th e lat e 1920s , worke d with he r fathe r an d neve r seeme d t o lac k confidenc e i n her dealing s wit h boys an d men . Ye t afte r givin g th e valedictor y speec h a t hig h schoo l o n "making a life, " sh e wondered , "Wha t i n billy-blue-blaze s d o I kno w about makin g a life? " lon e Robinson , wh o lef t he r mothe r t o mov e t o New Yor k t o pursu e he r desir e t o becom e a painter , foun d a growin g sense o f meanin g i n he r work . Later , however , whe n Rockwel l Ken t made th e seemingl y capriciou s deman d tha t sh e bur n al l o f he r earl y paintings, sh e complied "ou t o f pur e spite , just to sho w hi m tha t I could and woul d mak e ne w ones." 39 Robinson' s decisio n t o bur n he r picture s shows a n ambivalen t self-assertio n base d o n self-doubt s bu t als o o n he r growing confidenc e i n her artisti c ability . As youn g wome n live d throug h thei r year s o f singlehood , the y fre quently recognize d th e tentativenes s o f thei r identitie s an d als o thei r movement towar d greate r self-confidence . Simpl y growin g olde r seeme d to brin g abou t change . A s a senio r i n college , Marth a Lavel l note d th e changes i n her personal lif e sinc e her freshman year . "I t i s no longer har d to mak e friends . N o mor e o f tha t crushin g feelin g o f inferiorit y tha t handicapped m e i n th e presenc e o f an y girl. " Distinctiv e experiences , such a s travel , coul d mak e th e chang e eve n clearer . Doroth y Smit h ex pected stud y i n Pari s t o allo w he r t o "liv e mor e full y & expres s mysel f in ever y way. " Jessamy n West , als o travelin g i n Europe , bega n "t o fee l more myself , o r a t leas t mor e o f th e sel f I lik e t o be " a s sh e gre w clos e to th e companion s sh e live d wit h i n Paris . Sh e als o gaine d markedl y i n confidence. O n th e shi p t o Europ e a t th e beginnin g o f he r summe r o f study, sh e would neve r hav e confronte d th e purser an d demande d bette r accommodations a s sh e did a t th e en d o f th e trip. 40 For most middle-clas s women, independenc e an d self-confidenc e gre w with competenc e i n caree r o r profession . Viol a Whit e recognize d he r need t o gai n contro l o f he r lif e an d t o liv e independently . A t ag e thirty -

68 The

Single Woman

eight sh e decide d t o tak e "accoun t o f m y gift s an d limitation s an d se t forth systematicall y t o develo p th e former. " Elizabet h Yates , benefittin g from he r sister' s experience , defie d he r family' s discouragemen t an d hel d firm t o he r desir e t o write . A s sh e gained acceptanc e a s a featur e writer , Leila Seco r discovere d th e "bounding , pulsing , thrilling jo y of lif e withi n me; tha t ol d feelin g o f confidenc e i n m y powers—a s ye t no t full y trie d or tested—an d th e sublim e sor t o f certaint y tha t I shall b e abl e t o fight my way , howeve r difficul t th e obstacles." 41 Leil a Seco r woul d continu e to fee l sublim e certaint y whe n sh e joine d th e peac e movemen t tryin g t o forestall America n entr y int o Worl d Wa r I . Working ful l tim e o n peac e activities, sh e me t a sympatheti c youn g graduat e studen t i n economic s who woul d eventuall y becom e he r husband . Bu t whe n Phili p Floren z first proposed , i n Marc h 1917 , Leila Seco r tol d hi m sh e was to o bus y t o be engaged . In th e 1920s , a s i n th e 1910s , caree r an d marriag e ofte n seeme d in compatible. Onl y abou t 1 2 percent o f professiona l wome n wer e marrie d in 1920 , an d eve n thoug h a growing portio n o f marrie d wome n worke d during th e followin g decade , th e grea t majorit y o f thes e wer e domesti c workers. During th e Depression , th e constraints o n marrie d wome n pur suing career s becam e eve n greater , becaus e man y employer s refuse d t o give marrie d wome n work . An n Mari e Low' s cooperatin g teache r wanted t o marr y bu t kne w tha t sh e woul d hav e t o giv e u p he r jo b an d that sh e an d he r fiance coul d no t liv e togethe r an d suppor t hi s mothe r on hi s salar y alone . Low , plannin g fo r a career i n journalism , kne w tha t a "marrie d woma n lose s al l independenc e an d an y chanc e a t a caree r o f her own." 42 The conflic t betwee n marriag e an d caree r playe d a n importan t rol e in the large r conflic t tha t wome n fel t betwee n marriag e an d self-definition . Marriage remaine d th e goa l an d destin y o f mos t America n women . When the y worked , mos t wome n expecte d t o marr y later . "It' s th e bes t and bigges t thing, " wrote Clar a Savag e of marriage, "bu t ther e are othe r experiences I want first." Bu t choosin g a career, a s Dickinson an d Bea m pointed out , "i s a choic e agains t marriag e insofa r a s i t remove s unique ness an d place s marriag e amon g alternatives. " Wome n wh o foun d a sense o f purpos e an d growin g competenc e i n thei r work—Leil a Secor' s sublime certainty—migh t wel l loo k askanc e a t th e dubiou s promise s o f married life . When Clar a Savag e Littledal e late r asked , rhetorically , i n a Good Housekeeping article , "ca n a gir l affor d t o marry? " sh e reflecte d

The Single Woman 69 the concern s o f man y wome n ove r th e los s o f independenc e tha t cam e with marriage. 43 Among th e problem s discusse d b y Littledal e i n he r articl e wa s the difficulty tha t man y wome n fel t i n finding an d choosin g th e right man. Littledale, alon g wit h Judg e Be n Lindsey, recognize d th e important rol e of caree r i n allowin g wome n t o fee l somethin g lik e equalit y wit h men. "The result, " accordin g t o Lindsey , "i s that man y a youth finds himsel f subject t o rathe r contemptuou s inspectio n b y the young woma n o f his choice." Wit h n o compellin g nee d t o marry , an d wit h mor e self confidence base d o n thei r competenc e a s professionals , wome n migh t find th e failing s o f youn g me n more apparen t an d their ow n independ ence mor e dear . Fro m strivin g a s adolescent s t o b e "wante d o r chose n or considere d desirable , b y a membe r o f th e opposit e sex, " youn g women move d towar d valuin g themselve s for their ow n achievements. 44 The Ambiguity of Desire Personality—self a s socia l performance—ma y hav e bee n th e mos t widely accepte d concep t o f sel f b y th e 1920s , bu t a concurren t tren d within bot h academi c circles and popular cultur e assumed a n underlying, biological meanin g for self. Chemist Loui s Berman in 1922 proposed the view, accepte d b y many physicians , that ever y manifestation o f behavio r had a n explanatio n i n the operation o f the endocrine glands . Man y social scientists , le d by Harvar d professo r Willia m McDougall , presente d human behavio r a s th e produc t o f multipl e instincts . Th e importan t works o n the psychology o f advertising writte n i n the 1920s encourage d advertisers t o appea l t o "wants " grounde d i n suc h basi c drive s a s the need t o acquire , possess , escap e pain , an d find emotiona l excitement. 45 Psychologist Joseph Jastrow als o treate d huma n natur e a s fixed and fur ther offere d specifi c mal e traits : "The one selected trai t o f the male fro m the clu b o f the cave-man t o the masculine protes t o f Adle r i s mastery. " Elinor Glyn' s Philosophy of Love include d chapter s o n "Th e Nature o f Woman" an d "The Nature o f Man." Bot h chapter s bega n wit h section s describing an d explainin g "fundamenta l instincts. " "Ma n is a hunter, " wrote Glyn , "a hunter always. " But even modern wome n ar e still willing to b e ruled. 46 As a "biologica l fact, " sexua l desir e shoul d hav e give n young wome n in th e 1920 s a clea r connectio n t o thei r underlyin g nature . Warne r Fa -

70 The

Single Woman

bian's flapper s an d Be n Lindsey's jaz z babie s titillate d o r shocke d Amer icans wit h thei r eagernes s fo r sexua l pleasure . Socia l researc h showe d that heterosexua l intimac y ha d becom e commo n amon g unmarrie d youth. Informatio n gathere d b y psychologist Lewi s Terman i n the 1930 s showed tha t o f women bor n befor e 1890 , 13. 5 percen t ha d sexua l inter course befor e marriage . Fo r thos e bor n i n th e decad e afte r 1900 , th e figure ros e t o 5 0 percent , wit h a n eve n highe r percentag e fo r wome n born i n th e followin g decade . Dickinso n an d Bea m foun d th e growin g heterosexual experimentatio n o f th e perio d a health y precurso r t o goo d married sex . A late r stud y o f colleg e se x identifie d a wid e rang e o f healthy se x experience s fo r youn g women , fro m th e ordinar y caresse s of "love-making" t o experiment s tha t include d intercourse. 47 But eve n researcher s wh o supporte d sexua l expressivenes s foun d tha t young wome n ofte n harbore d ambivalen t feeling s abou t sexua l pleasure . Psychologist Elto n May o believe d tha t ignoranc e abou t se x was a wide spread proble m amon g adolescen t women . Dickinso n an d Bea m foun d that man y youn g wome n (an d a smal l numbe r o f youn g men ) remaine d ignorant o f th e se x ac t unti l afte r marriage . An d althoug h som e youn g women separate d se x an d emotion , th e researcher s foun d tha t mos t women stil l tende d t o loo k fo r se x withi n th e contex t o f lov e relation ships. Thi s accorde d wit h th e widesprea d assumptio n tha t fo r wome n sex ha d mor e t o d o wit h emotio n an d th e desir e fo r childre n tha n i t di d for men . "Th e sexua l impuls e o f woma n i s no t th e simpl e momentar y desire o f th e male, " wrot e on e psychoanalyst , "bu t a highl y ambivalen t emotion i n which fea r i s intimately mingle d wit h desire." 48 In popula r literatur e an d i n th e cinem a o f th e 1910 s an d 1920s , th e heterosexual pleasure s availabl e t o wome n le d t o marriag e o r ende d i n disaster. Th e eroticizatio n o f image s i n advertisin g an d cinem a coexiste d with a continuin g condemnatio n o f unchastit y fo r women . Clar a Bow' s character i n "It/ 9 fo r instance , pursues Cyru s Waltham wit h scrapp y an d flirtatious abandon . Bu t when h e kisses her afte r thei r first date, she slaps him, tellin g him she' s not tha t kin d o f girl . In Hot Stuff a college woma n "pretends t o drin k an d smok e and nec k becaus e she thinks fellows prefe r whoopee—girls," bu t th e leadin g ma n "call s he r bluff, " turnin g he r to ward romanc e an d awa y fro m th e excesse s o f th e flesh . Jessamy n Wes t tried t o explai n t o he r husban d tha t a woman migh t deligh t i n the atten tions o f a man bu t remai n incapabl e o f returning "tha t desir e in kind" — "frank delight " migh t sho w "satiety. " "Th e woma n mus t appea r t o re pulse an d scorn." 49

The Single Woman 7

1

As we saw i n the las t chapter, th e joys of necking include d excitemen t over social success , attention fro m attractiv e boys , and sexua l desire. The accounts tha t girl s gav e o f "primitiv e love-making " neve r dwel l exclu sively o n physica l satisfaction . Jan e Sherma n coul d no t understan d he r own reaction s t o th e attention s o f he r beau : "sometime s hi s kisse s thril l me bu t usuall y the y don't. " Youn g wome n ofte n experience d th e desir e of other s a s confusing o r frightening . Viol a Whit e fel t draw n t o spea k t o a soldie r durin g a rain y night' s walk , bu t sh e feare d approachin g hi m might sti r u p th e boy' s "sensuality. " Jessamy n Wes t receive d repeate d propositions, fro m me n an d wome n alike , durin g he r summe r o f stud y and trave l i n Europe. Before sh e becam e accustome d t o these she considered th e encounter s a s a reflection o f persona l failing. 50 The passio n o f me n coul d com e a s a threa t t o wome n wh o ha d neve r come t o term s with thei r ow n desire . By age twenty-one, Winifred Willi s could recogniz e th e "muffled , inarticulat e passion " sh e inspire d i n men . "It i s th e sor t o f thin g me n alway s fee l a t first," sh e reflected , "befor e they decid e they' d rathe r di e tha n marr y me , & : will di e i f I don' t yiel d to their immora l demands. " Later, involved wit h two men, she separate d her desir e fo r th e tw o o f them . Sh e ha d n o longin g fo r Bub' s bod y bu t felt sh e could marr y hi m fo r hi s companionship. Sh e would neve r marr y Bill bu t longe d fo r hi s body . "S o yo u se e Journal, " sh e concluded , " I have onl y on e traged y left—th e onl y on e I have eve r had—Virginity." 51 Willis experienced he r ow n passio n a s "muffled, inarticulate, " and foun d embracing i t difficul t unti l late r life . Dorothy Smit h wa s mor e attracte d t o girl s than boy s durin g he r ado lescence an d manage d t o remai n "self-sufficien t & cooll y independent " toward me n unti l he r earl y twenties . Durin g a musi c summe r schoo l a t age nineteen , however , sh e me t a n older , marrie d ma n wh o penetrate d her reserve , althoug h "no t withou t considerabl e embarrassmen t & re sentment o n m y part. I couldn't ge t use d t o suc h a n intens e & masculin e sort o f perso n al l a t once. " Wherea s sh e believe d tha t he r first mal e interest taugh t he r man y essential s abou t "th e othe r sex, " sh e neverthe less fel t relieve d tha t h e wa s married . Smit h foun d he r first approac h t o heterosexual desir e disturbing , an d sh e remaine d aloo f fro m me n unti l her month s o f stud y unde r Nadi a Boulange r i n Pari s whe n sh e bega n t o feel th e "enormou s undercurren t o f se x appeal. " Eve n so , sh e ha d no t surrendered t o the current an d fel t that "i t is all slightly repulsive." Smith would struggl e late r i n analysi s wit h th e ambivalenc e o f he r desir e fo r her fiance. "Mus t I respon d t o hi m a s a tremblin g re d ho t wire, " sh e

jz The

Single Woman

wondered, "o r ma y I pus h hi m int o th e air y sunshin e alon g wit h th e trees an d lov e him a s I do them[?]" 52 Clara Savag e charte d th e ambiguit y o f desir e i n he r ow n life . "Whe n I wa s growin g up, " sh e wrot e i n 1916 , "lov e wa s on e thin g an d th e sexual ac t anothe r entirel y separat e thing . Th e latte r wa s ba d an d inde cent excep t betwee n th e marrie d an d the n i t wa s fo r th e purpos e o f having children. " Sh e onl y realize d tha t sexua l passio n playe d a leadin g role i n lov e durin g he r colleg e years , an d the n onl y a s a n intellectua l insight. Afte r college , perhaps a s a result o f he r ow n passionat e relation ships, sh e "bega n t o wonde r i f the y couldn' t b e separated—i f desir e wasn't a goo d thin g i n itsel f withou t insistin g o n havin g i t dresse d u p a s love." 53 Savage's thinkin g clearl y reflecte d bot h th e need s sh e fel t i n he r ow n life an d th e growin g awarenes s withi n America n cultur e o f se x a s a natural an d desirabl e elemen t o f huma n life . A singl e woma n an d a professional i n Ne w Yor k Cit y durin g th e prewa r years , Savag e date d several me n an d als o ha d passionat e relation s wit h severa l women . Sh e undoubtedly kne w radica l thinker s fro m Greenwic h village . I n 1915 , during he r confusio n ove r se x an d love , sh e rea d Edwar d Carpenter' s Love's Coming-of-Age, a widel y influentia l wor k tha t proclaime d "Lus t and Love " a s "subtl y interchangeable " o r perhap s on e an d th e same . Savage though t th e boo k "prett y goo d an d true. " Perhap s readin g Car penter helpe d Savag e t o a bette r understandin g o f he r ow n desire . Car penter's insistenc e o n th e primar y valu e o f lifelon g marriag e fo r love , however, ma y als o have helpe d Savag e reaffirm lov e as the only sanctio n for sex . "Fo r me, " sh e wrote , "ther e coul d neve r b e an y joy , an y sens e of fulfillment , anythin g bu t a ghastl y emptines s an d horro r i n a se x re lationship withou t love." 54 Because youn g wome n experience d grea t ambivalenc e abou t desire , when the y finally discovere d unambiguou s sexua l passion , i t ofte n cam e to the m a s a revelation , a n eroti c momen t t o matc h th e psychologica l moment o f romanti c love . Dickinso n an d Bea m include d a first-person account o f a woman' s sexua l awakening , fro m he r lov e fo r anothe r woman i n college to he r friendship s wit h me n i n Europe durin g th e war . After returnin g t o the states she met a man who capture d he r heart. "M y whole being, " sh e wrote , "wa s swep t a s i f b y fire. Th e physica l effec t was s o sever e tha t on e nigh t th e lip s o f th e vagin a parte d an d I forme d the first realizatio n o f th e aperture. " Doroth y Smith , a s he r engagemen t

The Single Woman 7

3

to Davi d Dushki n continued , ha d "da y dream s o f passionat e sensua l possession o f others—forcin g m y wil l & pleasur e upo n them. " Afte r months o f a growin g friendship , th e twenty-eight-year-ol d Hele n How e suddenly on e evenin g foun d hersel f i n th e arm s o f Joh n Marquand . "There wa s nothin g I could hav e wanted t o hold back, " sh e recalled. "I t was fo r thi s utter , complet e self-givin g tha t I mus t hav e bee n keepin g myself."55 Even whe n th e eroti c momen t cam e mor e tha n once , i t alway s sur prised women . Winifre d Willi s foun d i t wit h severa l men . He r ambiva lence towar d desir e bega n i n adolescenc e an d include d image s a t onc e frightening an d fascinating . Sh e dreame d o f "bodie s crushin g dow n o n me—of terribl e satisfaction—o f unhol y cravings. " Sh e woul d wak e u p exhausted bu t "read y t o g o ou t o n th e stree t afte r som e sor t o f love. " Her romanc e with Bill , whose bod y she desired, ended with their parting, but no t befor e sh e foun d Bill' s bod y i n be d wit h her . " I foun d a t tha t night &c sinc e tha t m y pygm y wil l alway s se t m e o n fir e wit h desire, " although sh e kne w sh e woul d neve r lov e him . Afte r leavin g Bill , sh e began t o dat e Tomm y wit h who m sh e fel t n o passio n unti l the y cam e home fro m a nigh t o f dancin g an d dining . H e staye d a t he r apartmen t that night , an d the y slep t together, a s they would o n man y futur e nights , although withou t havin g sex . Sh e wrot e later , "Whe n I li e bac k i n hi s arms & giv e him m y lips I forget everythin g els e except the sweet, gentle, greedy fee l o f him." 56 The intens e desir e o f th e eroti c momen t surprise d wome n an d liber ated the m t o surrende r themselve s t o thei r passion , althoug h no t neces sarily t o th e "immora l demands " o f th e me n wh o inspire d thi s passion . Diarists Howe , Smith , an d Lockhart , lik e Dickinson' s unname d patient , enjoyed thei r lovers ' caresse s ye t remaine d virgin s unti l marriage . Dick inson an d Bea m described thi s a s "an intermediat e stag e of all-but-coitu s in whic h unio n ha s no t bee n consummate d bu t onl y vagina l chastit y i s preserved." Those women wh o "wen t th e limit" generally made love first with men they loved and , in most cases, expected t o marry. Beth Twiggar kept he r virginit y a s he r clai m upo n self-respec t i n th e fac e o f he r repu tation fo r bein g easy . Her firs t intercours e was with he r fiance. Althoug h that marriag e neve r happened , Twigga r kep t he r mos t intimat e physica l caresses fo r me n sh e loved . Marjori e Kinna n experience d repeate d frus trations i n trying to find tim e and opportunit y fo r a tryst with he r fiance . "We los t ou r chanc e Thanksgiving, " sh e wrot e t o Charle s Rawlings ,

74 The

Single Woman

"when I ha d th e apartmen t absolutel y t o myself—al l da y an d unti l 9:30." Kinna n nevertheles s dreame d o f her lover an d looked forwar d t o " 'a n orgy o f lust' " o n their honeymoon. 57 Desire an d lov e woul d becom e importan t element s o f th e emotiona l lives o f mos t youn g wome n comin g o f ag e in the 1920s . Ye t most mid dle-class singl e wome n ha d no t abandone d themselve s t o desir e an d many foun d i t difficul t t o abando n themselve s t o love . Romance , s o important i n th e cultura l prescriptio n fo r th e young, femal e self , mad e up onl y par t o f a complicate d mixtur e i n th e live s o f singl e women . Career an d independence als o mad e powerfu l appeal s t o young women , and persona l historie s of family lif e could yield views of marriage at odds with th e cultural ideal . Fo r women wit h a stron g an d clear sens e o f the purpose an d directio n o f thei r lives , lov e an d sexua l awakenin g coul d come a s expansiv e an d promising . Fo r wome n lackin g suc h self assurance, desir e and romance seeme d bot h threatenin g an d confusing . Ambivalence and Acceptance As w e sa w at th e beginnin g o f th e chapter , i n onl y a fe w month s a s a single woman, Glady s Bel l experienced bot h th e struggles of establishin g herself i n her career and the ambivalent appea l of romance and marriage. Later note s sho w tha t i n 192 1 she fell il l with "nerves " and had to close her one-roo m schoo l i n Seit z earl y i n th e spring . T o hel p recove r he r health, sh e traveled t o Washington , D.C . The reason fo r Bell' s indispo sition remain s unclear—perhap s pressure s fro m wor k ha d overwhelme d her. Yet she took u p teaching in the fall at Whitesburgh, so she obviously found continuin g attraction s i n her career. Her 1922 diary begin s on her birthday, Marc h 3 . "Twenty-on e an d happy , contente d fo r once , an d occupied," sh e wrote . A fe w day s late r sh e reporte d o n he r improve d health an d on sleeping "sweetly " fo r the first tim e sinc e 1920. 58 Among othe r concerns , social pressures aroun d marriag e had contributed t o Gladys' s il l health. Sh e wrote abou t a dat e t o a musicale, wher e "the crow d wa s tolerable, bu t I simpl y canno t fee l 'thei r way. ' I'm out of place, bored o r weary-disgusted wit h som e things, especially husbands and domestication." Marriag e remaine d a persistent concer n fo r Glady s Bell durin g th e next severa l years . I n the spring o f 192 2 she dated tw o young men , Marlin Penrod , who m sh e referre d t o a s Red , an d Jame s Nelson, Jr., whom sh e always called Junior. Red Penrod, a big handsome man wh o drove a truck fo r Sterlin g Oil , could appal l Bel l with hi s wild

3.2 Glady s Bel l in 1925 . Courtesy o f Mr . an d Mrs . DeLan e Penrod .

j6 The

Single Woman

ways, bu t h e als o ha d a knac k fo r delightin g he r wit h hi s sweetnes s an d devotion.59 Althoug h bette r educate d tha n Penrod , Nelso n lacke d stead y work an d seem s t o hav e struggle d i n th e earl y 1920 s t o launc h himsel f in business . Bot h wante d t o marr y Gladys . Finally , o n Ma y 18 , sh e be came engage d t o Re d Penrod . Stil l unabl e t o reconcil e he r confusin g mixture o f feeling s fo r th e tw o men , Glady s foun d hersel f overcom e b y longing, wonder , an d happines s whe n sh e me t wit h Junio r a fe w week s later. He r solutio n wa s t o accep t Junior' s proposa l o f marriag e an d t o make clea r t o bot h me n tha t sh e needed tim e to decid e betwee n them . Dickinson an d Bea m celebrate d engagemen t a s a "midsumme r mad ness" tha t gav e "unimpede d expression " t o bot h romanc e an d "person ality" an d allowe d greate r continuit y betwee n th e singl e lif e an d mar riage. Fo r man y wome n lik e Glady s Bell , however , engagemen t ha d become a transitiona l stag e i n courtshi p tha t allowe d furthe r assessmen t of th e prospectiv e partner. 60 I n th e month s afte r sh e gav e he r tentativ e promise t o Re d an d Junior , Bel l looke d t o he r cultur e fo r a clea r guid e to th e meanin g o f lov e i n he r life . Sh e coul d identif y wit h character s i n movies, takin g thei r situation s o r personalit y a s representation s o f he r own, a s sh e di d i n 191 9 wit h th e characte r o f Micke y fro m th e Mac k Sennett comed y b y tha t title . Durin g he r confusio n ove r he r choic e be tween Re d an d Junior , sh e foun d guidanc e i n th e movi e Island Wives, which depicte d "labor , sacrific e poverty—an d love, agains t riches , eas e luxury an d indifference. " I n mid-1922 , Glady s fel t tha t Re d Penro d of fered th e greate r materia l security , bu t sh e fel t draw n t o Junio r Nelso n more powerfully . Th e movie , Glady s believed , "twa s mean t t o hel p m e decide m y destiny." 61 Bell had n o hesitation i n accepting the romantic platform. Lov e would transform he r life , sh e believed . On e o f th e novel s sh e read claime d that , "In Life' s grea t chora l symphony , th e keynot e o f th e dominan t melod y is Love." 62 Glady s reproduce d th e novel' s prais e i n he r ow n reflection s on love . " A mighty , unconquerable , forc e bor n o f Heaven, " sh e wrote , "which people s th e world , make s happiness , create s harmony , instill s higher motives , and—wha t doesn' t lov e do? " I n fact , Glady s added , "what i s life bu t a fulfillmen t o f love' s demand[?] " Lov e shape d th e whole lif e an d i t cam e no t a s actio n o f th e wil l bu t a s a demand , a s something beyon d th e sel f an d overpowerin g th e will. She compared he r feelings fo r on e o f he r beau s wit h " a grea t whirlpoo l drawin g m e grad ually t o th e cente r o f it s passion. " Yet , i f Glady s coul d sometime s fee l the tu g o f affection , sh e neve r fel t confiden t enoug h tha t th e passio n o f

The Single Woman JJ the momen t wa s genuin e love . "I' m longin g fo r someon e t o crus h m e t o his breast . . . ," sh e wrote jus t befor e Penro d proposed . "Ca n i t b e possible that I' m i n love ? No—I don' t thin k I am." 63 Her ambivalenc e abou t romanc e prove d to o grea t fo r Glady s t o re solve i n 1922 . After a tri p t o Michiga n i n th e lat e summer , sh e returne d to Pennsylvani a an d brok e of f bot h o f he r engagements . Sh e attende d Grove Cit y Colleg e durin g 192 2 an d 192 3 an d returne d t o teachin g th e following schoo l year . B y 192 4 Glady s Bel l woul d agai n fac e decision s over marriage . Throughou t thi s perio d sh e trie d agai n an d agai n t o match wha t sh e learned abou t lov e from he r cultur e wit h he r ow n expe rience. Gladys experienced he r ambivalenc e abou t romanc e a s confusion ove r the directio n o f he r life . Hopin g fo r a n overpowerin g experienc e tha t would transfor m he r life , Glady s foun d hersel f unabl e t o mak e th e deci sions an d commitment s tha t woul d se t the directio n o f her life . "Wome n may see k fo r peac e an d jo y an d happiness, " sh e wrot e i n 1924 , "bu t after al l th e mos t blissfull y peacefu l an d restfu l moment s o f a woman' s life ar e thos e i n th e arm s o f hi m wh o love s her, " an d late r tha t yea r sh e hoped tha t he r lov e woul d "dra w [her ] personalit y t o it s heigh t an d beauty." Bu t sh e coul d neve r b e certai n tha t an y o f th e me n wh o at tracted he r mos t an d wh o wooe d he r mos t ardentl y qualifie d a s the on e man wh o coul d giv e her th e peac e an d th e self-developmen t sh e wanted . Unable t o find he r idea l ma n i n rea l life , sh e bega n a correspondenc e i n March 192 3 wit h a drea m lover , a n imaginar y bea u wh o ma y have bee n based o n someon e sh e knew bu t wh o nevertheles s represente d he r ideal , the on e who coul d inspir e the kind o f transforming passio n tha t Bel l had learned t o expect . " I wonde r i f I'l l mee t yo u soon, " sh e wrote i n on e o f her earl y letters , "or i f you ar e onl y a 'phanto m o f Dreams. ' " 64 In November 192 4 Bel l tried t o resolve , or a t leas t end, her confusio n by acceptin g a secon d proposa l fro m Re d Penrod . "Well , I mean i t thi s time," sh e wrot e th e nex t day , an d th e tw o woul d marr y th e followin g April. Ye t th e ne w engagemen t onl y aggravate d he r ambivalenc e abou t the plac e o f lov e i n he r life . "Fo r Goodnes s Sake! " sh e wrot e jus t fou r days afte r th e engagement , "I' m i n a n awfu l stew— I don' t wan t t o b e married, yet, " keepin g i n min d he r recurrin g (althoug h generall y mild ) illnesses, " I don' t kno w whethe r i t is good fo r m e to b e singl e unde r th e circumstances." A s th e dat e fo r th e weddin g approached , Glady s kep t trying t o reconceptualiz e he r resolv e t o marr y a s a "moder n arrange ment" o f convenience o r a s a practical ste p based o n economi c necessity .

yS The

Single Woman

Bell admired Penro d an d fel t affectio n fo r him , yet sh e refused t o believ e that he r regar d fo r Penro d wa s th e passio n sh e had waite d for . "Lov e t o me i s somethin g a s ye t undefine d an d unexperienced, " sh e wrote i n De cember o f 1924 , an d i n Apri l o f th e nex t year , jus t week s befor e th e wedding, "Funnies t thin g o f m y lif e i s that I never 'fel l i n love. ' " 65 Even as she prepared t o marry, i t seemed tha t onl y a dream love r could satisf y Gladys Bell . Bell's doubt s abou t lov e mirrore d he r doubt s abou t th e self . Severa l months befor e he r secon d engagemen t t o Penrod , Glady s Bel l wrote tha t her succes s a s a teache r an d he r yea r a t Grov e Cit y Colleg e ha d give n her greate r confidenc e bot h professionall y an d socially . "M y mentalit y has bee n wonderfull y expande d an d i n man y directions. " Sh e pride d herself o n he r succes s a s a teache r an d kne w tha t sh e could liv e withou t a husband' s support . A t times , he r expansiv e sens e o f he r accomplish ments an d ideal s mad e i t difficul t t o imagin e tha t an y ma n coul d mee t her requirement s fo r a husband. 66 Ye t Glady s experience d hersel f a s in complete and , a s w e sa w above , expecte d th e lov e o f a ma n t o giv e he r life fullnes s an d integrity . Fo r Gladys , lov e represente d th e mos t impor tant o f th e strategie s sh e followed fo r self-fulfillment . The freewheelin g an d slightl y rac y moralit y o f Flaming Youth an d o f the movie The Perfect Flapper attracte d Gladys , as did th e independenc e of a career . Ye t sh e live d i n a rura l societ y wher e parent s an d friend s expected he r t o marry . Thes e conflictin g goal s hel p accoun t fo r bot h he r nervous trouble s o f 192 1 an d he r self-doubts . Th e highl y mutabl e per sonality o f moder n America n cultur e seeme d alway s paper thin , for Fitz gerald's Amor y Blain e a s well a s for Glady s Bell . Both th e fictional char acter an d th e schoolteache r searche d fo r som e fundamenta l cor e o f sel f beyond th e demand s o f socia l performance . Glady s believe d tha t sh e could achiev e a full , ric h sens e o f sel f an d a n abundan t lif e throug h discovering he r ow n inne r potential . Fo r a youn g woma n fro m a mor e comfortable backgroun d i n an urban area , this might have led to psychoanalysis, a s i t di d fo r Doroth y Smith , o r t o philosophica l speculations , as it did for Winifred Willis. 67 Gladys Bell searched fo r a fuller sel f withi n the quasimystica l advic e literatur e o f th e period . Marie Corelli' s Life Everlasting woul d serv e Glady s Bel l a s Mar y Baker Eddy' s Science and Health an d Emil e Coue's Self Mastery through Conscious Auto-Suggestion woul d serv e othe r youn g wome n o f th e 1920s. Th e wor k gav e Glady s bot h a cosmi c contex t fo r sel f an d a sys tem fo r managin g he r life. According to Corelli , the individual sou l could

The Single Woman yy partake i n th e Divin e i f onl y th e individua l woul d remembe r he r eterna l reality, tha t is , her genuin e self . Once discovered , th e genuin e sel f woul d guide th e individua l throug h al l th e confusion s o f lif e an d giv e he r th e power o f directin g he r ow n destiny . Thos e wh o embrace d sicknes s be came ill. 68 Those wh o embrace d healt h an d happines s woul d hav e the m for th e taking . Inspired b y Corelli' s novel , Bel l fel t confiden t tha t sh e woul d enjo y "strength an d brightnes s i n spit e o f dar k clouds " through th e exercise of will power . " I shal l tr y m y powe r ove r other s an d forge t t o b e sa d an d moody." He r ques t fo r psychi c healt h centere d o n he r effort s t o contro l her emotions . Bel l attempte d t o gai n directio n o f he r emotion s b y look ing o n th e brigh t side , b y cultivatin g health y habits , an d b y simpl y per sisting i n goo d cheer . "M y lif e i s seemingl y ful l o f beautifu l an d soul satisfying service , ligh t pleasur e an d usefulness, " sh e wrot e i n a typica l effort a t emphasizin g everythin g goo d abou t he r life . Sh e believe d tha t "Happiness i s a Habi t t o b e cultivate d o r discourage d a t will, " an d sh e hoped t o sustai n happines s throug h suc h strategie s a s "Smil e a t leas t 2 0 times a day, " an d "Abstai n fro m frettin g o r worry, regardles s of circum stances." During a later time of trouble sh e hoped t o take herself i n han d with a Corelli-lik e pe p talk : "Self-pit y i s deathl y an d self-analysi s i s a s good a s medicine s o le t u s have mor e o f th e latte r m y littl e woman, an d see i f w e can' t fee l better , hav e a bette r time , loo k prettie r an d giv e th e world a smil e an d lot s o f dimple s ful l o f sunshine." 69 While Bell' s menta l disciplin e an d effort s t o for m goo d habit s gav e her som e calmnes s i n th e fac e o f emotiona l struggles , the y rarel y gav e her the control sh e desired. "I' m losin g my grip on myself," she lamented in 1924 . " I ca n contro l m y menta l stat e i f I asser t al l m y wil l t o tha t point bu t stil l I lose my temper." I f her weaknes s o f will proved frustrat ing i n th e fac e o f ba d childre n a t schoo l o r relation s wit h he r parents , i t proved devastatin g i n her searc h fo r tru e love. Instead o f finding th e kin d of transformativ e lov e promised b y Corelli , th e "immorta l unio n o f tw o Souls i n one, " Glady s foun d he r sens e o f sel f i n turmoi l a s marriag e approached. " I wis h I could sli p awa y int o no-wher e an d forge t it, " sh e wrote o f he r impendin g marriage . A fe w week s late r sh e coul d find n o anchor fo r sel f anywhere : "Can' t find jo y i n m y wor k an y more . Can' t see any us e in bein g married, don' t believ e in love or marriage fo r mysel f and I don' t wan t t o b e awa y fro m home. " A s he r weddin g da y cam e closer, Bel l wrot e agai n an d agai n o f he r melanchol y an d lac k o f direc tion. Just a few day s fro m th e date , she felt hersel f "nea r hysteria." 70

8o The

Single Woman

The ambivalenc e tha t Glady s experience d towar d desir e compounde d her confusio n ove r marriag e an d he r reluctanc e t o accep t he r feeling s a s love. Glady s though t o f hersel f lik e th e perfec t flappe r i n th e movi e o f that titl e a s "joyou s bu t no t immoral . . . virtuous bu t no t ol d fash ioned." Sh e believe d sh e coul d hel p he r siste r understan d th e differenc e between a lover' s kis s "an d tha t o f th e worldl y wis e 'petter. ' " Ye t Gladys viewe d th e prospec t o f physica l lov e wit h considerabl e anxiety . Like mos t adolescent s an d youn g adul t wome n o f th e decade , Glady s Bell enjoye d th e casua l caresse s o f dating . Ho w littl e thi s taugh t he r o f intense desir e becam e clea r whe n sh e mad e he r tri p t o Michiga n i n th e summer o f 1922 . While stayin g wit h he r cousin , sh e enjoye d he r youth ful attractivenes s an d wrot e hom e tha t sh e "vampe d tw o me n insid e o f an hou r wit h m y wonderfu l eyes. " Sh e went to o far , though , whe n sh e playfully flirte d wit h he r cousin' s husband . Whe n he r cousi n lef t fo r a few moment s on e day , th e husban d "seize d hi s opportunity. " Althoug h Gladys admitte d tha t sh e "shouldn' t hav e permitte d hi m t o kis s m e o r hold m e i n hi s arms, " sh e refuse d t o accep t an y responsibilit y fo r th e brief embrace : "to o sudde n wa s th e movemen t t o enabl e m e t o preven t the mischief. " Bu t i n additio n t o placin g he r i n a compromisin g situa tion, th e inciden t als o brough t Bel l literally fac e t o fac e wit h sexua l passion. " I wonde r wha t menta l anguish , o r menta l desir e make s a ma n turn pale , hi s lip s trembl e an d hi s voic e t o waver. " Sh e mad e plan s t o leave tw o day s later , bu t o n th e nigh t befor e he r departur e he r cousi n retired earl y an d th e husban d agai n too k Bel l in hi s arms . Thi s tim e th e embrace di d no t las t a momen t bu t tw o hours . "Surel y Go d save d m e again tonight, " recorde d Gladys , "fo r neve r befor e ha s an y ma n bee n s o absolutely slav e t o hi s passio n a s tha t ma n was , i n m y presence." 71 Rather tha n recogniz e he r ow n desir e an d willin g involvement , Glady s set he r experienc e dow n a s a warnin g fro m Go d abou t th e uncontrolla ble passions o f men . The prospect o f marriage mad e Bell's ambivalence abou t physica l love ever more apparent . Sh e hoped fo r a mate "sufficientl y stron g to conque r the anima l passion s o f hi s nature." He r experienc e i n Michigan, though , made he r doub t tha t suc h a man existe d a s she recalled that "ma n rouse d the first bitte r sarcas m o f disgus t an d disdain—ma n impregnate d m y soul with suspicio n an d ma n deadene d . . . the power to love." 72 Happily for Glady s Bell , Re d Penro d prove d t o hav e bot h th e lov e fo r he r an d the wil l t o giv e u p intercours e o n thei r weddin g night . Onl y severa l weeks later , afte r anxiet y an d trepidatio n o n Bell' s part , di d the y full y

The Single Woman 8

1

consummate thei r marriage . Lik e man y women , Glady s Bel l eventuall y found satisfactio n i n marrie d se x and i t becam e par t o f th e satisfactio n she found i n marriage . Gladys Bel l experience d bot h romanc e an d desir e a s ambivalent pas sions. She had appropriate d th e cultural image s o f love as the fulfillmen t of sel f an d a s a n overpowerin g transformatio n tha t absorbe d th e self . Drawn t o bot h o f thes e ideals , Bel l als o foun d tha t he r ow n growin g sense o f competenc e an d independenc e contradicte d th e cultura l ideal s to som e extent . Nevertheless , sh e felt tha t sh e had t o marry , i n spit e of her reasone d an d emotional aversio n t o marriage. The prospect o f physical lov e als o faile d t o settl e he r min d abou t marriage . Rather , he r ambivalence abou t he r own desire and her distrust o f the desire of her lover made he r griev e al l th e mor e he r los s o f innocenc e an d independence . Marriage fo r Bell , a s fo r mos t middle-clas s women , woul d settl e thes e feelings o f confusion. I n a sense, the issue of what the self would becom e was surrendere d t o th e ideal o f th e sel f a s a marrie d woman . Althoug h this gav e som e relief , i t als o lef t othe r possibilitie s fo r sel f unanswered , preempted b y the demands o f married life . A minorit y o f wome n decide d agains t marriage . Fo r thes e women , singlehood wa s not a transitio n wit h a well-define d conclusio n i n mar riage. Dickinso n an d Bea m foun d tha t wor k gav e som e wome n a wid e enough variet y o f satisfaction s t o tak e th e place o f se x and companion ship. Anothe r minorit y o f wome n foun d bot h se x an d companionshi p outside o f marriage . Th e professiona l wome n amon g thei r cas e studie s seemed to have had relationships tha t ofte n laste d many years. Dickinson and Bea m als o showe d tha t a significan t portio n o f singl e wome n wer e homosexual. Som e o f thes e wome n ha d ful l sexua l live s wit h othe r women, wherea s other s followe d "relationship s o f companionship " o r "chief interest " ove r a period o f many years. 73 Dickinson an d Beam tende d t o suppor t th e common sens e of medica l and advic e literatur e i n assumin g tha t th e psychic o r physiologica l pro pensities o f women determine d thei r attitud e towar d bot h me n and mar riage. On e physicia n blame d th e attitude s o f "old-maidish , cold , an d reserved" girl s o n thei r "psychopathic , reserved , over-religious , o r sexu ally anaesthetic " mothers . Onl y disaste r coul d follo w i f suc h girl s mar ried. Novelis t Elino r Gly n recommende d t o wome n wh o were "col d b y nature" t o "mak e u p you r min d t o joi n tha t increasin g bod y o f female s whose rea l interes t i s not in man or children, bu t in things an d careers." Similarly, homosexualit y appeare d a s a fixed condition—i f no t exactl y

82 The

Single Woman

a pathology , i t wa s no t exactl y a complimen t either . Afte r Katherin e Bement Davis' s stud y o f colleg e women , bot h scholarl y an d popula r literature recognize d th e prevalenc e o f passionat e relation s amon g women. Thos e wome n wh o persiste d i n suc h relations , however , cam e to b e seen as a particular typ e of sexua l being. The category o f homosex ual, whic h ha d replace d th e medica l ter m "invert " b y th e 1920s , as sumed a fixed sexua l orientation. 74 Our wor k support s neithe r th e vie w o f singl e wome n a s "sexuall y anaesthetic" no r th e belie f tha t wome n wh o lov e wome n live d ou t un varying psychologica l o r biologica l imperatives . Persona l paper s almos t inevitably revea l th e passionat e longing s o f youn g women . Eve n thos e women wh o seemed , outwardly , th e mos t reserve d nevertheles s yearne d for affectio n an d eve n physica l caresse s i n thei r writings . We als o foun d little evidenc e o f exclusivel y homosexua l orientations . Jus t a s girl s lik e Beth Twigga r coul d deligh t i n thei r crushe s whil e pursuin g date s an d necking wit h boys , young wome n frequentl y ha d profound , lovin g rela tions wit h wome n an d me n a t th e sam e time . Eve n amon g wome n wh o had long-live d intimat e friendship s wit h women , interes t i n me n seem s to hav e comfortabl y coexiste d wit h lov e for women . Although th e imag e o f lif e withou t marriag e i n th e 1920 s include d loneliness an d emptiness , youn g wome n ofte n foun d ful l live s i n wor k and service . Harrie t Louis e Hard y wa s on e suc h woman . Firml y com mitted t o he r profession , Hard y rarel y wrot e o f lonelines s o r o f confu sion ove r th e directio n o f he r life . Bor n i n 1906 , Hardy gre w u p i n Ne w Jersey. Sh e graduated fro m Wellesle y Colleg e i n 192 8 an d the n attende d Cornell Medica l School . Late r i n lif e Hard y woul d reflec t tha t sh e ha d never marrie d becaus e sh e wa s "wedde d t o medicine, " bu t a s sh e com pleted he r medica l studie s an d embarke d o n he r life' s work , Hard y ex perienced th e attraction s o f companionshi p an d lov e an d pondere d th e place o f passio n i n her life . He r stead y sens e of sel f an d purpos e allowe d her t o recas t eac h experienc e a s anothe r face t o f a full , rewardin g life. 75 Hardy's ideal s o f sel f resemble d thos e o f a n earlie r generatio n o f pro fessional women . A commitment t o service and a strong spirituality char acterized he r reflection s o n he r ow n life . " I kno w I wa s bor n t o b e a doctor," sh e wrote durin g th e earl y month s o f he r practice . " I lov e people i n distress ; I feel fo r the m endlessl y an d ca n wor k mysel f ragge d fo r them." Sh e kne w tha t he r middle-clas s famil y ha d give n he r a privilege d upbringing tha t allowe d he r t o gai n skil l an d experienc e "t o mak e th e world a finer plac e t o liv e in. " Eve n he r frustratio n ove r mistake s sh e

The Single Woman 8

3

made an d he r fatigu e wer e "annulle d b y th e lov e m y patient s giv e m e and thei r gratitude . . . . I am s o tired I ache bu t I am read y t o g o bac k t o the ward—I wil l find somethin g t o do , important, human , satisfying." 76 Although Hard y ha d suc h a clea r sens e o f hersel f a s a physicia n tha t she woul d refe r t o medicin e a s "th e Goddes s I worship," bot h medicin e and servic e t o other s existe d fo r Hard y withi n a contex t o f spiritualit y that pervade d he r lif e an d work . A n Episcopalian , sh e wrot e repeatedl y of he r fait h tha t "Go d i s reaching fo r us " an d workin g throug h us . Sh e referred t o he r wor k a s a "tremendou s responsibility " chose n b y her bu t also a n expressio n o f th e wil l o f God . "Th e Sel f i n m e i s God-given ; belongs t o God ; wil l b e shape d & molde d b y Go d til l th e sel f o f th e small s is no mor e an d onl y life-with-Go d i s practicable." This surrende r to th e wil l o f Go d di d no t diminis h Hardy' s abilit y t o experienc e he r strength an d independenc e a s a n individual ; rather , i t allowe d he r t o se e her commitmen t an d professio n a s havin g transcenden t value . Whe n a Catholic pries t tol d he r tha t sout h Philadelphi a wa s ful l o f peopl e wh o prayed fo r he r ou t o f gratitude , sh e wrot e i n he r diary , "Go d mak e m e worthy o f it!" 77 A sense of self define d b y service, career, and fait h mad e Hardy almos t Victorian. Sh e fel t a t time s "essentiall y independent , alone , apart , suffi cient perhap s to o muc h so—stil l ther e i t is! " Ye t he r self-sufficienc y never preclude d stron g emotiona l tie s t o bot h me n an d women . On e young ma n wh o too k he r t o a pla y durin g he r residenc y i n Ne w Yor k made he r fee l "youn g &c war m & exuberant"—"w e ar e alive , fles h & blood an d gla d o f it." A year late r sh e enjoyed dinin g with th e same ma n and realize d "tha t I am ver y fond o f S & enjo y bein g near him." 78 Hardy recognize d " a ver y feminine streak " i n her personality bu t als o believed that , o n balance , sh e wa s mentall y an d physicall y mor e mal e than female . Durin g Hardy' s residencie s i n New Yor k an d Philadelphia , female friend s inspire d he r greates t passion . He r first referenc e t o E (Hardy referre d t o he r lovers , mal e an d female , b y initials) , a fello w female residen t i n Ne w York , describe d " a mos t uniqu e night " o f wor k together o n th e sam e ward . "Bu t th e whol e thin g wa s pleasantl y perme ated wit h th e quic k flashes o f friendship , th e war m gras p o f a wante d hand an d th e myria d o f littl e thing s tha t mak e huma n relation s s o satis fying, s o sane. " A s thei r relationshi p grew , Hard y experience d he r lov e for E as enormously an d powerfull y satisfying : "it s strength is incredible; its influenc e endless. " Si x month s later , o n a visi t t o E , Hard y quickl y rediscovered th e "sens e o f belongin g tha t I feel whe n w e ar e together." 79

84 The

Single Woman

This relationshi p ha d littl e i n commo n wit h schoolgir l crushes . Bot h women wer e adults , bot h professionals . Unlik e a n earlie r relationshi p that ha d seeme d to o demandin g fo r Hardy , sh e experience d he r lov e fo r E a s mutua l an d reciprocal . Sh e characterize d he r feeling s a s response s to "certai n essentials—th e nee d o f soul s fo r eac h other ; th e infinit e sat isfaction i n clos e companionship ; th e dee p pleasur e i n intimac y o f per sonalities." In it s mutuality an d i n the powe r i t carried fo r bot h women , Hardy's relatio n wit h E resemble d th e idea l o f romanti c love . Yet , i n spite o f th e intensit y o f he r emotions , Hard y fel t confiden t i n he r lov e for E . E' s lov e fo r he r "almos t make s m e afraid, " Hard y wrote , bu t sh e still fel t certai n tha t al l woul d wor k out . "Sometime s i t seem s fraugh t with dange r b y it s ver y intensity, " sh e wrote , "agai n it s peac e seem s a n essential benedictio n t o m y bus y life . I have a confidence tha t i t will tur n out well—ther e i s a purit y o f purpos e i n bot h o f ou r attitude s tha t wil l keep us—Go d gran t i t so!" 80 Hardy's reflectio n o n he r feeling s fo r E shows th e confidenc e sh e fel t in he r ow n sens e o f hersel f an d he r relianc e o n divin e help . I t ma y als o point t o Hardy' s fea r tha t th e lov e sh e bor e E migh t tur n int o a sexua l relationship. I f so , she believe d tha t sh e an d E could contro l thei r desire . She continue d t o hav e fait h i n he r inne r resource s t o dea l wit h passio n and disappointment . Durin g a wee k tha t sh e describe d a s "sho t thr u with emotiona l conten t o f a fierce and painfu l type " Hard y relie d o n " a certain privat e lif e tha t i s full an d rich." 81 Several years later Hardy calle d o n those same inner resources to carr y her throug h a fa r mor e disappointin g relationship , thi s on e wit h a man . In he r first positio n a s a physician , a t Northfiel d Seminar y fo r girl s i n Northfield, Massachusetts , Harriet Hard y cam e to know R , who worke d at th e sam e institution . He r attractio n t o R shape d he r emotiona l lif e fo r more tha n a year. " I hav e com e t o lov e an d cheris h R, " sh e wrote earl y in thei r acquaintance . Almos t a yea r later , hi s "slightes t attention, " sh e wrote i n one entry, gives "meaning an d colo r t o my life." If Hardy's lov e for E implie d romanti c love , he r desir e fo r R mad e i t evident . " I hav e read s o ofte n i n Mis s Millay' s vers e an d elsewher e o f a lover' s longin g and i t ha s seeme d touchin g bu t remot e fro m m y experience . I t i s n o longer so." 82 Unlike her earlier loves, however, Hardy's love for R went unrequited . "Alas," sh e wrot e earl y i n he r relationship , "perhap s h e neve r think s o f me." Si x month s late r th e realizatio n ha d becom e mor e an d mor e clea r that the y woul d no t becom e lovers . " I hav e spen t hour s steelin g mysel f

The Single Woman 8

5

to th e ide a tha t I shal l neve r hav e R an d ca n d o withou t hi m an d the n he call s m e an d i t al l goes. " Later , whe n sh e ha d resigne d hersel f t o giving u p he r hope s fo r R , sh e fel t a "futilit y an d los s an d uselessnes s and uncertainty " tha t sh e ha d neve r experience d before . Hard y learne d to accommodat e eve n thes e negativ e emotion s an d t o find hersel f calme r and les s desperately lonel y i n the months tha t followed . In failing t o gain R's love , singlehoo d agai n becam e Hardy' s future . Sh e looke d ahea d t o study an d medicine , wor k wit h students , an d winte r sports . "M y ol d optimistic sel f bob s u p it s hea d t o sa y I will lear n muc h fro m thi s expe rience." 83 In a memoir o f her lif e written i n 1983 , Hardy remembere d th e period after 193 6 a s a "turnin g point " i n he r persona l life . Th e memoi r say s nothing abou t R an d he r disappointments . Rather , sh e recalle d havin g "a happ y socia l life" while a t the sam e time "findin g reason s for refusin g offers o f marriage , jus t a s I ha d don e i n medica l school. " A t leas t i n retrospect sh e understoo d th e late r 1930 s a s the time that sh e decided i n favor o f caree r an d gav e u p o n th e possibility o f marriag e an d family . " I believe that I am trul y wedde d t o medicine, " sh e wrote. "S o whil e I had and hav e friends o f bot h sexes , my primary allegianc e is to medicine. For me a t least , this ha s bee n utterl y satisfying." 84 Although decision s abou t th e cours e o f he r lif e entaile d fa r greate r ambiguity tha n he r retrospectiv e summar y suggests , he r statemen t re veals a cor e trut h abou t Hardy' s inne r strength . Hardy' s optimis m an d commitment t o a life o f servic e ar e evident fro m he r life' s work . I n 193 9 she becam e colleg e physician a t Radcliff e Colleg e an d i n 194 5 bega n th e studies o n th e effect s o f berylliu m poisonin g tha t woul d mak e he r a national authorit y o n industria l toxicology . Sh e established th e Nationa l Beryllium Registr y an d th e Occupationa l Medicin e Clini c a t Massachu setts Genera l Hospita l i n 1947 . Late r sh e woul d becom e a professo r a t Harvard Medica l School. 85 A s w e hav e seen , Hard y fel t powerfull y th e attractions o f romanc e i n he r life , ye t sh e could overcom e th e shortcom ings o f he r relationship s wit h R throug h he r stron g commitmen t t o he r life's work . The differen t experience s o f Bel l and Hard y i n facing emotiona l crise s undoubtedly poin t t o a rang e o f personalit y differences betwee n th e tw o women. Th e tw o example s sugges t tha t th e emotiona l experience s o f women i n th e 1920 s wer e shape d b y th e resource s availabl e t o th e self . Women wh o fel t confiden t o f thei r competenc e an d purpos e coul d fac e emotional crise s wit h greate r resilienc e an d s o manag e thei r emotion s

86 The

Single Woman

more successfully . The y coul d als o ope n themselve s t o th e intensit y an d conflict o f romanti c passio n and , perhaps , o f desire , mor e easil y tha n women wh o lacke d a firm sens e o f self-identity . Glady s Bell , wh o fel t fully th e tentativenes s o f singlehood , foun d stead y conflic t i n th e ques tion o f marriage . Th e questio n o f who m sh e shoul d marr y becam e s o important tha t onl y an unrealistically idea l mate could make the decisio n an eas y one . Hardy , wh o escape d th e tentativenes s o f singlehoo d b y embracing wor k an d career , face d n o suc h demand s o n he r sens e o f purpose. Hard y als o carrie d wit h he r a sens e o f transcendenc e tha t al lowed he r t o plac e he r action s an d decision s withi n a cosmi c scheme . Bell wanted suc h transcendence , yet her attempt s t o gain it through mys ticized positiv e thinkin g failed . Hardy , wh o experience d hersel f a s com petent, coul d mor e readil y experienc e th e sel f a s transcendent . The example s o f Bel l an d Hard y als o sho w th e powe r o f cultur e t o shape experience . Th e romanti c platfor m o f th e 1920 s an d 1930 s tha t presented lov e a s th e uniqu e an d transformativ e experienc e o f lif e con vinced mos t women . Althoug h wome n ma y hav e realize d tha t th e ro mantic platfor m promise d no t onl y th e fulfillmen t bu t als o th e los s o f self, the idea l o f lov e set the standard s tha t wome n use d t o evaluate thei r own experiences . Thos e wome n wh o embrace d th e alternativ e o f a lif e committed t o caree r migh t escap e the cultural calculu s and find lov e an d fulfillment o n differen t terms . Ye t th e exampl e o f Harrie t Hard y make s it clear tha t wome n require d grea t self-assuranc e an d competenc e to find satisfaction outsid e th e culture' s sanctione d pathwa y t o fulfillmen t an d happiness.

4

The Flapper Wife

Shortly afte r sh e married Lori n Thompson i n 1924, writer Winifred Wil lis cam e t o believ e tha t sh e wa s fundamentall y unsuite d t o marriage . Although sh e love d he r husban d passionately , sh e foun d tha t th e har mony and intimacy of their courtship an d first weeks of marriage quickl y gave wa y to periods o f emotiona l estrangement . Sh e attributed virtuall y all o f thei r problem s t o he r own personality an d vowed t o remak e her self. "Alread y I a m strugglin g t o conque r myself, " sh e wrot e severa l months afte r he r wedding ; "m y nerves , m y habits , m y selfishness , m y irritable instinct s o f the recluse, just fo r his sake. . . . Many time s a day I whisper 'For bim^ an d so succeed i n conquering som e meannes s i n myself."1 Two year s late r th e ton e o f he r diar y hadn' t changed . Winifre d stil l loved he r husban d passionately , yearne d t o b e hi s perfec t mate , an d struggled t o overcom e he r shortcoming s a s a wife . Th e characteristic s that mad e he r happ y a s a singl e woma n (independen t an d solitude loving) an d tha t contribute d t o he r succes s a s a writer an d poet (intro spective, sensitive ) hindere d he r in he r efforts t o emulat e th e models of modern marrie d happines s tha t sh e believed woul d satisf y he r husband . "He want s a home, children, friends , socia l activities , popularity, succes s . . . I hav e bee n a dra g o n him , pullin g hi m down , discouragin g him , communicating to him the slow poison of my own inevitable philosophy , which gnaw s forever , destructively , a t the healthy tissue s o f my being. " Willis fel t i t necessary t o take radica l step s towar d savin g he r marriage, which sh e deemed mor e valuabl e tha n selfhood . "I f I a m to chang e al l this, to be glad an d happy, t o bear children , ther e i s only on e course fo r 87

88 The

Flapper Wife

me—I must deny my very self. I mus t no t onl y lear n rigi d surfac e con trol; I must suffe r a complete inne r negation." 2 Following Worl d Wa r I , on e o f th e mos t widesprea d image s o f th e new role s fo r wome n wa s tha t o f th e flappe r wife . Althoug h Willi s di d not conside r hersel f a flapper , th e crisi s sh e experience d a s a ne w wif e mirrored th e difficultie s tha t popula r expert s predicte d woul d challeng e a generatio n o f youn g women . Glori a Gregory , th e heroin e o f Beatric e Burton's 192 5 novel , The Flapper Wife, als o suffere d i n a marriag e sh e considered a mismatch . Glori a believe d tha t a woma n i n marriag e ha d the choic e o f becomin g eithe r a slav e o r a doll . Unlik e he r mothe r an d grandmother, sh e was determine d no t t o becom e a slave . O n he r honey moon wit h Dick , sh e spen t heroi c sum s o n clothe s an d perfume , an d when the y returne d t o thei r ne w home , sh e insiste d o n havin g a house keeper. "Sh e woul d neve r b e a househol d drudge , he r hand s shrivele d with washin g dishes . Her nail s broken . Her dresse s smudged wit h pastr y flour." Whe n Dic k insiste d tha t h e didn' t mak e enoug h mone y t o hir e servants, Glori a becam e hysterical , an d i n the en d sh e got he r way . This marriage, begu n wit h suc h contrasting expectations , deteriorate d rapidly. Dic k wante d children ; Glori a foun d th e ide a repulsive . Sh e preferred t o spen d he r day s shoppin g an d he r night s dancin g o r goin g t o parties, ignorin g Dick' s complaint s o f havin g to o littl e mone y an d to o little energy . Whil e Dic k wa s har d a t work , Glori a rekindle d a romanc e with a handsome acto r wh o supporte d himsel f b y cadging off o f women . And whe n Dic k wa s force d t o tak e a tri p t o recuperat e fro m a n illnes s brought o n b y to o muc h wor k an d to o littl e wifel y care , Glori a seize d the opportunit y t o pursu e Stan , th e actor , t o Ne w Yor k Cit y wher e sh e hoped t o find wor k o n th e Grea t White Way . In th e en d Glori a an d Dic k reunited , bu t onl y afte r Gloria' s humilia tion an d rehabilitation . He r acto r boyfrien d ha d alread y marrie d whe n Gloria arrive d i n Ne w York , an d th e Broadwa y producer s wer e unim pressed wit h he r beauty—excep t on e who offere d he r a role on a casting couch. Crushed , Glori a returne d t o he r hometown , too k a job , an d learned th e skill s of housekeeping . In the final page s of The Flapper Wife Dick an d Glori a embrace . "Ah , i t was goo d t o b e here, " Glori a reflects , "to surrende r herself! " Sh e ask s he r husband , " 'Di d yo u eve r sto p t o think ho w nic e i t is for tw o peopl e t o car e fo r jus t eac h othe r . . . and t o have littl e childre n becaus e o f thei r carin g so? ' " Dic k agrees : "I've bee n trying t o tel l yo u tha t al l along , Flapper . Bu t yo u neve r woul d believ e i t before, woul d you?" 3

The Flapper Wife 8

9

The imag e o f th e flappe r wif e gav e expressio n t o anxietie s fel t b y many i n the roaring twentie s that marriag e migh t not b e included amon g the "ne w interests , ne w attractions , ne w ideals " o f th e ne w woman . A sand paintin g i n Asbur y Park , Ne w Jersey , showe d "th e agonie s o f a man marrie d t o a flappe r a s h e hold s a smal l bab y o n hi s kne e a t th e hour o f two. " A Literary Digest articl e warne d o f th e "jazz-baby " wh o would soo n tire of the "monotonie s o f matrimony." Par t of Hollywood' s stock i n trade durin g th e decad e wa s th e stor y o f a married coupl e mak ing a difficul t adjustmen t fro m fun-lovin g singlehoo d t o marrie d life. 4 Although th e flappe r wif e represente d th e concer n tha t moder n lif e made youn g wome n unfi t fo r marriage , marriag e itsel f wa s th e targe t o f an opposin g strai n o f criticism . Journalis t Samue l Schmalhausen , wh o invented the idea o f a sexual revolution an d o f the new morality, claime d that whe n a woman discovere d th e satisfaction s o f sexua l lov e she "pos itively prefer s t o b e sweethear t an d mistres s rathe r tha n wif e an d mother." Psychiatris t G . V. Hamilton, who carried ou t one of the earlies t scientific studie s o f marriage , pointe d ou t tha t mos t peopl e ca n adjus t t o almost an y situation , ye t the y "fai l t o mak e o f marriag e anythin g lik e a tolerable situatio n fo r themselves. " Eve n man y "wh o g o o n livin g to gether find i n marriag e a hatefu l bondage , a dreary , long-drawn-ou t ha rassment an d a stultifyin g relationship. " "There' s n o plac e lik e home, " wrote Samue l Schmalhausen , "excep t a lunatic asylum." 5 Gladys Penrod , whos e quandarie s a s a singl e woma n w e discusse d i n the previou s chapter , rea d Burton' s nove l shortl y afte r sh e married . Sh e wrote tha t "i t wa s a strok e o f luc k tha t I ran acros s T h e Flappe r Wife. ' That i s surel y a n hones t portraya l o f ou r presen t da y marriag e an d it s meaning." Althoug h Glady s accepte d th e book' s warning s abou t th e dangers o f moder n wome n an d moder n attitudes , sh e als o too k comfor t in th e story' s resolution . "Afte r al l love i s al l tha t i s wort h livin g for. . . ." 6 Glady s place d he r hop e i n a revised , modernize d versio n o f marriage explaine d an d describe d b y socia l scientist s an d journalist s alike. Th e youn g wif e i n Sidne y Howard' s The Silver Cord describe d what moder n marriag e ha d t o offe r he r husband : " A har d time . A chance to work o n his own. A chance to be on his own. Very little money on whic h t o shar e wit h m e th e burde n o f raisin g hi s child . Th e pleasur e of m y society . Th e solac e o f m y love . The enjoymen t o f m y body." 7 Th e wife, althoug h youn g an d modern , exhibite d non e o f th e flightines s o f the flapper . Rather , a s a biologist , sh e penetrate d t o wha t sh e believe d was th e cor e meanin g o f marriage . I t fulfille d th e sexua l desire s an d

90 The

Flapper Wife

parental instinct s o f th e wif e an d husband , i t offere d companionshi p with affection , an d i t gav e wome n an d me n a n opportunit y t o achiev e full adulthoo d throug h independenc e fro m childhoo d tie s an d throug h work. Women appropriate d th e ne w idea l o f marriag e an d worke d t o mak e it a realit y i n thei r lives . Ye t th e ne w role s an d satisfaction s o f moder n marriage prove d formidabl y difficul t t o achieve . Ol d value s ofte n col lided wit h ne w expectations ; biologica l drives , seemingl y th e engin e fo r the succes s o f moder n marriage , mor e frequentl y disappointe d cultura l expectations tha n fulfille d them . An d wome n foun d themselve s caugh t between cultura l ideal s o f moder n wome n an d moder n wives . Companionate Marriage Although companionat e marriag e usuall y refer s t o th e idea l o f marriag e that crystallize d i n th e Unite d State s i n th e first decade s o f th e twentiet h century, th e mode l o f marriag e a s lovin g companionshi p betwee n hus band an d wif e ha d bee n generall y accepte d b y th e middl e clas s i n th e Northeastern state s b y the middle o f th e nineteent h century . From abou t 1830 unti l lat e i n th e centur y th e styl e o f courtshi p i n th e middl e clas s fostered romanti c love—passionat e an d transcenden t desir e for anothe r unique individual . Marriag e advic e literatur e i n th e nineteent h centur y dealt wit h disharmon y i n marriag e b y urgin g couple s t o find way s t o foster greate r commitment t o the marriage an d affectio n fo r on e another . As Willia m Alcott , a widel y rea d write r o n th e marriag e issue , pu t it , "Mutual lov e is the onl y guid e t o connubia l happiness." 8 Yet th e distanc e betwee n me n an d women , bridge d durin g courtship , generally returne d i n marriage . Th e middl e clas s tha t forme d i n th e towns an d citie s of the young republi c create d home s in which the fathe r was frequentl y absent , a t wor k i n th e countinghouse , th e office , o r th e retail stores . Men create d thei r ow n sphere s of homosociality i n fraterna l organizations an d recreationa l activities . Women , alon e wit h othe r women an d children , shape d a hom e lif e tha t wa s distinctivel y feminine . Women assume d th e most importan t rol e in child rearing , and th e bond s between mothe r an d chil d gre w ver y strong . Thi s help s explai n th e con tinued importanc e o f bond s amon g wome n friend s an d relations , war m and eve n passionat e feeling s tha t coul d las t ove r decades . Thi s als o meant tha t th e husband migh t retur n t o his home a s a stranger, someon e whose authorit y stil l prevaile d bu t whos e value s ha d bee n abandoned .

The Flapper Wife 9

1

The separate sphere s of men an d wome n helpe d defin e th e gendered role s and possibilitie s o f eac h se x an d als o shape d th e marriage , givin g hus band an d wif e specifi c satisfaction s an d responsibilitie s withi n marriage . Unfortunately, th e separatio n coul d see m lik e distance an d indifference. 9 Important shift s i n American societ y would alte r the American famil y structure b y the turn o f the century. A continuing declin e in the birthrate , led b y middle-clas s women , mean t tha t wive s a t th e tur n o f th e centur y would hav e th e car e o f fa r fewe r childre n tha n thei r grandmother s had . Women ha d mor e tim e fo r activitie s outsid e th e hom e and , potentiall y at least , more time to spen d with spouses . The separation o f genders als o declined, a s wome n move d int o th e workplac e i n clerica l position s an d in growin g number s o f professiona l positions . Th e yout h cultur e o f th e high schoo l an d th e ne w courtshi p style s tha t emerge d aroun d th e tur n of th e centur y als o undermine d th e separat e spheres . The proportio n o f women wh o marrie d ros e an d th e ag e o f marriag e decline d fo r wome n and me n fro m 189 0 unti l th e 1920s. 10 Reformers an d intellectuals , fro m anarchis t Emm a Goldma n t o se x researcher Haveloc k Elli s an d feminis t Charlott e Perkin s Gilman , at tacked th e Victoria n famil y fo r it s stultifyin g effect s o n women , sexual ity, o r societ y a s a whole . Man y turn-of-the-centur y intellectual s ques tioned th e transcenden t valu e o f th e middle-clas s idea l o f a closed , private marriag e fo r lif e wit h complet e sexua l an d emotiona l exclusive ness. By the earl y 1900 s popula r author s suc h a s Edward Carpente r an d Ellen Ke y ha d offere d ideal s o f me n an d wome n free d fro m th e nine teenth-century monogamou s marriag e fo r life . Addressin g a differen t agenda, purit y crusader s introduce d sexua l issue s int o politica l debate s during th e Progressiv e er a throug h thei r concer n ove r th e prope r educa tion o f youth , th e reformatio n o f falle n women , an d th e containmen t o f venereal disease . Effort s o f reformer s fro m a variet y o f perspective s ha d the effec t o f destroyin g th e doubl e sexua l standar d an d openin g sexua l matters t o wide r discussion. 11 By th e 1920 s a ne w idea l o f companionat e marriag e ha d becom e s o widely accepte d tha t i t seeme d lik e a settle d matter . Th e birt h contro l reformer Mar y War e Dennet t wrot e tha t "on e o f the very prettiest sight s which presen t lif e afford s i s th e wa y i n whic h a relativel y smal l bu t rapidly increasin g minorit y o f youn g peopl e ar e livin g thei r mate d live s and producin g thei r wante d babies. " Autho r Floy d Dell , i n 1930 , be lieved tha t huma n instincts , onc e fre e o f repression , woul d reestablis h human relation s o n the basi s of free , individua l choice . This would mea n

92 The

Flapper Wife

courtship i n whic h me n pursue d an d wome n chos e marriage s base d o n romance an d create d permanen t union s i n whic h me n an d wome n ful filled thei r parenta l drives. 12 John Watson , th e behaviorist , writin g abou t th e sam e tim e a s Dell , maintained hi s positio n a s on e o f th e harshes t critic s o f marriag e an d family life . "Th e hom e remains , I suppose , a plac e t o chang e one' s clothes in , t o hav e cocktail s i n befor e goin g ou t fo r dinner , an d a plac e for spendin g a fe w hour s i n slee p (eve n i n thi s respec t th e rul e i s no t unbroken)." Ye t late r i n th e sam e essay , a s Watso n too k a speculativ e look int o th e past , h e imagine d a worl d startlingl y lik e th e on e Del l envisioned, where freel y promiscuou s young people formed exclusiv e unions base d o n compatibility . "Th e idea l happ y famil y situatio n (an d th e only on e I know) i s thu s a ma n an d woma n livin g togethe r wit h plent y to do , wit h o r withou t children , i n a seclude d cave , hu t o r blind , wit h little contac t wit h othe r huma n beings , with n o scar s from earl y trainin g and n o yok e fro m religio n an d mores. " Watson's primitiv e society , a s it happens, provide d a mode l fo r moder n companionat e marriage , includ ing dua l career s ("plent y t o do" ) an d lif e i n th e suburb s ("i n a seclude d cave . . . with littl e contact wit h othe r huma n beings"). 13 Whether the y too k a pugnaciou s attitud e towar d marriag e i n genera l or onl y th e flawe d marriag e o f narrow-minde d ancestors , advocate s o f modern marriag e understoo d i t a s a shar p brea k wit h th e past . And , a s modern marriag e assume d a n eve r mor e pervasiv e rol e i n America n cul ture, wome n too k th e leadin g rol e i n demanding , forming , an d benefit ting fro m it . Wit h thei r ne w independenc e i n heterosexua l courtship , young wome n ofte n appeare d "oversexed, " ye t thi s ne w independence , combined wit h th e us e o f contraceptiv e devices , meant tha t marrie d lov e could b e "enriche d an d greatl y reinforce d b y completel y fulfille d sexua l communion." B y the 1920 s becomin g a wif e mean t becomin g compan ion an d partner , role s tha t include d mor e sharin g a s wel l a s equalit y i n family matters , and perhap s eve n financial independence . The experienc e of youn g wome n i n th e busines s world , i n fact , no t onl y le d the m t o demand greate r equalit y i n marriag e bu t als o change d thei r attitud e to ward housework . Th e flapper doe s no t believ e housework i s hard, wrot e a contemporar y psychologist . "Sh e ha s see n to o man y meal s com e ou t of ti n can s an d delicatesse n stores . . . . Her proble m i s much mor e on e of finding a ma n wh o ca n affor d t o kee p he r a t home." 14 Th e pleasure s o f consumption joine d thos e o f th e fles h a s advertiser s mad e th e fruit s o f

The Flapper Wife 9

3

mass productio n int o prerequisite s fo r th e goo d lif e an d th e goo d mar riage. Fulfillment in Marriage Taking t o hear t th e ideolog y o f companionat e marriage , wome n i n th e 1920s an d 1930 s activel y sough t marriage s o f companionshi p an d love , good sex , an d consume r delights . They als o accepted , i n som e form , th e "measure o f success, " a s describe d b y sociologis t Ernes t Groves , as "th e extent t o which th e relationship encourage s th e development o f the char acter an d personalit y o f bot h husban d an d wife." 15 Moder n marriag e held ou t the promise of allowing women to form full y independent , adul t selves. That th e meaning o f independen t adulthoo d fo r wome n remaine d confusing appear s i n th e journa l o f Ann e Morrow . Th e fiancee an d late r wife o f th e aviato r Charle s Lindbergh , Morro w searche d fo r example s of th e "humdru m divinity " o f marrie d lif e i n her travel s befor e an d afte r her ow n marriage . Sh e wante d t o se e ho w wome n coul d b e happil y married an d stil l "self-contained, " ho w couple s coul d wor k i n equa l partnership an d maintai n lovin g regard fo r on e another. Sh e also consid ered possessions—th e flowers tha t wome n cultivated , ho w the y fur nished thei r homes—a s importan t expression s o f th e inne r lif e o f th e couple. "Thei r hous e wa s a strang e combinatio n o f th e newes t an d bes t in radio , plumbing , appliances , etc.—an d light s insid e a re d an d gree n glass parrot, " sh e wrot e o f on e coupl e tha t sh e an d Lindberg h staye d with.16 She concluded tha t the right kind o f relationship could harmoniz e even suc h discordan t tast e i n furnishing . The righ t kin d o f marriag e coul d onl y procee d fro m th e romanti c passion tha t som e singl e wome n believe d woul d transfor m thei r lives . This passio n seeme d t o provid e marriag e wit h a hal o fo r week s o r months. Mos t middle-clas s wome n believe d the y ha d foun d th e happi ness an d fulfillmen t tha t marriag e promised . Withi n day s o f he r mar riage, Isabell e McNeli s Sickler , i n rura l Tyrone , Pennsylvania , wrote , " I love m y husban d mor e ever y day. " Leil a Secor , unconstraine d b y th e line-a-day forma t tha t Sickle r used , gave her enthusiastic appraisa l o f he r husband a s "the most charming, tender, thoughtful an d delightful perso n in th e world. " Rathe r tha n a shar p chang e i n thei r lives , marriag e fo r Leila Seco r an d Phili p Floren z wa s "jus t a delightfu l continuatio n o f a rare an d beautifu l comradeship . . . . I hav e neve r know n an y unio n s o

94 The

Flapper Wife

sweet an d beautiful , s o spiritua l an d soul-satisfyin g a s ours . I dwel l i n the sunshin e o f Philip' s grea t soul , an d m y hear t sing s wit h happiness. " lone Robinson , wh o returne d wit h he r husban d t o thei r Ne w Yor k apartment jus t afte r thei r wedding , fel t "a s i f I' m sittin g i n heave n an d just startin g m y rea l life." 17 Robinson's sens e tha t he r lif e ha d onl y jus t begu n i s a strikin g testi mony t o th e powe r o f th e idea l o f marriage . Sh e ha d pursue d he r devo tion t o ar t acros s the United States , to Franc e an d the n Mexico , and ha d worked wit h artist s a s successfu l an d a s differen t a s Rockwel l Ken t an d Diego Rivera . Marriage , althoug h no t consciousl y o r conspicuousl y th e goal o f youn g professiona l women , almos t alway s seeme d lik e th e en d of a searc h fo r them . I t coul d giv e the m a sens e o f havin g foun d a ful l and complet e self . After he r marriage , Eld a Furry , fro m Altoona , Penn sylvania, foun d tha t he r husband, comedia n d e Wolfe Hopper , coul d no t always recal l he r nam e becaus e i t sounde d s o similar t o th e names o f hi s exwives. Sh e consulte d a numerologis t wh o suggeste d Hedda , a nam e her husban d manage d t o remember . "A t last, " recalle d Hedd a Hopper , "I ha d a n identit y o f m y own , an d wa s o n m y way." 18 Dorothy Thompson , alread y a successfu l foreig n correspondent , be lieved that he r marriage woul d mak e sens e of her life . "No t tha t I belong to yo u o r yo u t o me, " sh e wrot e t o Sinclai r Lewis , "bu t tha t w e tw o together belon g t o somethin g bigge r tha n eithe r o f us , an d thus , bein g together, serv e it." 19 Lov e and marriag e hel d the power t o give her some thing tha t he r internationa l renow n a s a journalis t ha d s o fa r faile d t o provide her . The Failures of Marriage Although wome n sought , an d generall y found , love , affection , compan ionship, sexua l pleasure , an d eve n materia l comfor t i n marriage , disap pointment i n som e elemen t o f marriag e appear s frequentl y i n the privat e writings o f middle-clas s women . Afte r th e passion s o f courtship , bot h men an d wome n migh t find marriage more humdrum tha n divine . Financial difficultie s o r unsatisfactor y se x coul d undermin e th e pleasur e o f either partner . Fo r women , however , th e shortcoming s o f marriag e proved fa r mor e difficul t tha n fo r men . I n abandonin g th e separat e spheres o f Victoria n marriage , moder n marriag e erode d th e socia l net works an d custom s tha t ha d provide d suppor t fo r wome n analogou s t o the support s th e worl d o f wor k provide d fo r thei r husbands . Moder n

The Flapper Wife 9

5

marriage wa s presented a s a total institution , wher e partners would full y satisfy thei r emotiona l an d sexua l need s an d realiz e tru e selves . Men , however, continue d t o hav e th e challenge s an d consumin g interes t o f work. B y 193 0 onl y 1 2 percen t o f whit e marrie d wome n worked , an d limitations upo n marrie d wome n workin g becam e eve n greate r durin g the Depression. 20 Marrie d wome n ha d th e hom e an d children , a s the y had i n th e nineteent h century , bu t the y lacke d th e cultura l suppor t an d the networ k o f contact s tha t forme d th e separat e spher e o f nineteenth century women . Whe n marriag e didn' t work , i t generall y didn' t wor k most fo r women . A larg e bod y o f popula r an d scientifi c literatur e fro m th e 1920 s on ward foun d tha t marriage s ofte n faile d t o mee t th e companionat e ideal . In Muncie , Indiana , Rober t an d Hele n Lyn d foun d "littl e spontaneou s community o f interest " i n marriag e an d a lac k o f honest y betwee n hus bands an d wives . G. V. Hamilton's stud y o f marriag e placed mos t o f th e marriages h e examine d i n categories rangin g fro m "doubtfu l success " to separation an d divorce . Dorothy Dix , one of the most widely read advic e columnists i n th e earl y decade s o f th e century , warne d tha t th e differ ences du e t o sex , heredity , an d upbringin g coul d threate n th e compan ionship i n companionat e marriage . Lik e othe r guide s t o marriage , Di x wrote that couples marry a n image of one another a s much as they marr y the rea l person , bu t onc e the y begi n t o liv e togethe r "the y find ou t tha t they hav e marrie d ordinar y huma n being s instea d o f angel s an d motion picture heroes . Come s th e clas h o f personalities." 21 One of the most common fear s represente d b y the image of the flapper wife relate d t o he r lac k o f restrain t withi n th e consume r culture . Bot h social scienc e an d popula r literatur e o f th e period recognize d th e impor tance o f "a n adequat e economi c arrangement " a s par t o f th e comple x set o f relations , goals , an d project s o f moder n marriage . B y th e earl y 1930s two-third s o f a family' s incom e wen t t o th e purchas e o f retai l goods. A prominent sociologis t characterize d th e economi c arrangemen t of mos t familie s a s "makin g mone y an d buying a 'living. ' " Advertiser s recognized wome n a s th e mai n consumer s i n th e househol d an d pitche d their product s t o appea l t o women' s desir e fo r a well-ru n an d well-fe d household. Legitimatio n fo r women' s rol e a s consumers appeare d i n ad s and magazin e article s toutin g wome n a s household managers. 22 Popular advic e literatur e an d advertisement s stresse d th e emotiona l value o f properl y manage d households . A well-ru n hom e woul d elimi nate a t leas t som e o f th e source s o f tensio n betwee n husban d an d wife .

96 The

Flapper Wife

As th e wif e becam e eve r mor e competen t a s a housekeeper , sh e woul d gain greater self-estee m whil e her husband woul d accep t her as a replacement fo r hi s mother . Ne w product s an d ne w approache s woul d allo w women t o operat e thei r home s mor e efficientl y an d giv e the m mor e lei sure, to gai n a fulle r life , an d t o rais e their childre n better. 23 Yet th e pleasure s o f a well-ru n hom e an d ne w product s coul d easil y collide wit h a family's budge t an d wit h olde r value s o f thrift an d saving . Sociologist Rober t Lyn d recognize d tha t emotiona l issue s coul d flare u p between husband s an d wive s ove r differences i n the exten t t o whic h on e of th e partner s ha d assimilate d th e ne w value s aroun d consumption . Differences i n value s appeare d i n popula r cultur e a s mora l issues . A n advice boo k fo r colleg e yout h abou t datin g an d courtshi p warne d against mate s wh o woul d b e extravagan t i n spit e o f th e limite d mean s available t o newlyweds . A n Atlantic Monthly stor y offere d th e patheti c figure o f a hard-workin g small-tow n dentis t whos e ban k accoun t "re mained alway s i n a n embryoni c state , fo r Mrs . Frenc h dre w ou t a s fas t as he r husban d coul d pu t in. " On e o f Good Housekeeping's "littl e les sons i n marrie d life, " suggeste d tha t a "psychologica l expert " lectur e prospective husband s an d (especially ) wive s o n th e comin g change s i n their lives . "Realize, Mary," th e exper t tell s the bride , "tha t yo u ar e stil l pretty muc h a strong-willed , egotistical , an d selfis h child. " Yo u thin k you wil l giv e u p anythin g fo r John , bu t marriag e wil l mea n givin g u p one smal l thin g afte r anothe r fo r year s t o come . Liv e withi n you r hus band's income , a popula r marriag e guid e commanded . "Ever y ma n ha s the right t o expec t tha t hi s wife will . . . . Women ca n b e wonderful man agers i f the y ar e loya l an d honest , an d i f yo u aren' t naturall y a goo d manager yo u ca n lear n t o be." 24 Hamilton's stud y o f marriag e linke d th e couple' s abilit y t o manag e finances t o th e succes s o f thei r marriage . Couple s i n th e stud y wit h th e highest leve l o f incom e wer e mor e satisfie d tha n couple s wit h lowe r lev els, and couple s that ha d save d money sinc e marriage were more satisfie d than thos e tha t ha d save d none . Most marrie d couples , of course, lacked the incom e t o bot h consum e freel y an d save , thereb y almos t insurin g that the y woul d find themselve s a t odd s wit h on e stron g cultura l value . Divorce proceeding s durin g th e 1920 s revea l tha t th e pressure s o f tryin g to provid e materia l abundanc e coul d lea d t o marita l problems . Women , as "th e purchasin g agent[s ] o f hom e an d o f society " foun d themselve s vulnerable t o the charge o f mismanagement. Willia m Ferris , for instance ,

The Flapper Wife yy told hi s mother tha t hi s wife, Margy, was "sill y and extravagant." 25 Mrs . Ferris accepte d thi s a s a n adequat e explanatio n fo r thei r divorce . Gladys Penro d considere d hersel f a conscientiou s consumer , ye t sh e wavered betwee n doubt s ove r he r family' s finances an d he r attractio n t o commodities. Althoug h Re d Penro d worke d throughou t th e Depression , Gladys an d Re d face d shortfall s i n thei r incom e a s they struggle d t o pa y their debts . Face d wit h th e limitation s brough t o n b y th e Depression , Gladys fel t th e nee d t o reflec t o n th e varie d role s tha t purchase s filled i n her imagination . " I gues s th e debt s worr y m e mor e tha n m y lac k o f clothing," sh e wrote , apparentl y resigned . Ye t th e ver y nex t paragrap h opened, " I reall y mus t hav e som e ne w dresse s i f onl y fo r th e sak e o f keeping m y husband' s ey e o n me. " Glady s believe d tha t consumptio n should contribut e no t onl y t o th e family' s botto m lin e bu t als o t o th e stability an d qualit y o f th e marriag e relationshi p an d t o th e emotiona l well-being o f th e woman . He r longing s agree d wit h advertisin g o f th e period tha t presente d a wide rang e o f good s a s necessary t o sustai n lov e in marriage . "I t neve r pays, " sh e wrote , "t o sacrific e to o muc h becaus e of debts . . . . A woman crave s pretty clothes and I guess has to have them to fill correctl y he r rol e a s wife , mother , bes t gir l an d companion. " Clothing coul d fulfil l bot h persona l an d interpersona l needs . Gladys suggested bot h function s late r i n the year whe n sh e returned fro m collectin g signatures fo r a loca l politica l cause . Sh e ha d gon e t o th e "mansion " o f one o f th e wealthiest me n i n town an d me t bot h th e owne r an d hi s wife . Gladys wondered, later , what the y thought o f her i n her simpl e ensembl e and withou t an y makeup . "Coul d the y tel l whethe r I wa s nervous[? ] I guess I wasn' t very . Bu t i t wa s becaus e m y clothe s di d no t embarras s me." 26 Later th e sam e year , Glady s considere d purchasin g a n electri c range . Just a fe w week s befor e sh e ha d live d throug h a "financia l panic " ove r the need to rais e money fo r taxes . Yet she thought tha t th e family budge t could manag e th e $1 0 dow n paymen t an d $ 5 monthl y payment . Sh e considered bot h th e practical an d emotiona l advantage s tha t a new stov e would provide . " I coul d exis t wit h th e ol d oi l burner, " sh e conceded , "but i t doesn' t bake , an d th e fume s an d smok e driv e m e to distraction. " A new stov e serve d a purpose i n socia l interaction . "Nearl y ever y hous e has a goo d stov e i f nothin g else. " Th e direc t persona l benefit , however , held hop e fo r benefit s fo r he r family . "M y lif e seem s sort o f without ai m now. Perhap s I could creat e a ne w hobby—goo d meals." 27

98 The

Flapper Wife Married Sex and the Threat of Frigidity

One o f the leading expert s o f the period o n women's household manage ment claime d fo r a fac t tha t th e stronges t instinc t o f women , an d th e major on e tha t advertiser s shoul d appea l to , wa s th e driv e fo r "se x love." 28 Thi s clos e allianc e o f se x an d consumeris m als o wen t t o th e heart o f moder n marriage , wher e th e emotiona l satisfaction s o f ne w goods woul d joi n wit h a vita l an d newl y liberate d sex life . Samue l Schmalhausen presente d hi s heterosexual declaratio n o f independence a s the self-eviden t trut h "tha t th e sex relation i s not to b e dedicated primar ily t o procreatio n bu t quit e naturall y t o recreation. " Behavioris t Joh n Watson note d th e pervasiv e presenc e o f sexua l theme s i n th e cultur e o f the day—movies, novels, newspapers, and magazines . As a consequence, " 'Virtue, ' 'purity ' i n th e ol d sense , rarely exis t an d ar e no t eve n consid ered desirable . Bu t ne w value s ar e comin g int o vogue : individuality — clear-sightedness—lack o f illusio n wit h life — . . . independence i n thought an d action." 29 Studies durin g th e 1920 s an d 1930 s b y physicians , psychiatrists , an d sociologists supporte d th e changin g value s o f th e ne w moralit y an d stressed th e importanc e o f sexua l pleasur e withi n marriage . The truth o f science becam e th e precept s o f marriag e guides . On e guide , writte n b y physicians, warne d tha t " a successfu l marriag e ca n hardl y b e expecte d where sexua l attractio n doe s no t exist , o r wher e th e marita l se x lif e i s unsatisfactory an d inadequate." 30 Yet , a s a popula r columnis t wrot e i n her guide , i f yo u mak e th e effor t t o lear n ho w t o pleas e you r husban d sexually, "you'l l ge t a magnificen t cooperatio n an d appreciatio n b y a husband wh o i s inordinatel y gratefu l tha t yo u ca n mee t hi m i n hi s ow n bed an d b e a grand companion." 31 The growin g availabilit y o f artificia l contraception , an d th e growin g phalanx o f physicians an d socia l scientist s who supporte d th e practice of contraception, seeme d t o mak e sexua l pleasur e eve n mor e availabl e t o the marrie d couple . A study o f marriage b y Robert Lato u Dickinso n an d Lura Ell a Bea m note d tha t wome n typicall y reacte d wit h shoc k t o th e first us e o f contraceptio n bu t tha t th e practic e "graduall y fall s int o rou tine lik e brushin g th e teeth." 32 Studie s o f differen t middle-clas s popula tions fro m th e late 1920 s found larg e majorities o f married couple s usin g some for m o f contraception o n a regular basis . With contraceptio n mak ing unwanted pregnanc y les s likely, it is no wonder tha t Marjorie Kinna n

The Flapper Wife yy could tak e deligh t i n quotin g t o he r fiance tha t th e " 'mos t correc t hon eymoon i s an org y o f lust. ' " 33 In spit e o f th e broa d agreemen t i n America n cultur e ove r th e desira bility o f goo d marrie d sex , middle-clas s wome n experience d desir e a s a complicated an d ofte n ambiguou s combinatio n o f motive s an d urges . Necking an d pettin g befor e marriag e seeme d t o tur n int o playfu l realit y the culture's image s o f sexua l desire . Yet, as we have seen , physical plea sure ha d ambiguou s attraction s fo r mos t youn g women . On e advic e columnist explaine d pettin g a s " a combinatio n o f curiosity , natural instinc t and a n overwhelmin g yearnin g i n th e ver y youn g t o establis h onc e an d for al l time the trut h tha t The y Hav e Se x Appeal." 34 Chastity unti l marriage—o r a t leas t unti l engagement—remaine d a strongly hel d mora l imperativ e fo r mos t middle-clas s women . Eve n though mor e wome n ha d wha t on e stud y calle d "illici t sex " before mar riage, mos t wome n ha d intercours e first wit h th e ma n the y married . Some respecte d voice s warne d o f th e danger s o f sexua l repression . Joh n Watson deride d th e "se x superstition " tha t tol d girl s "th e hyme n i s th e symbol o f virtue, that i t must b e jealously guarded." 35 Judge Ben Lindsey pointed ou t tha t societ y convince s youn g wome n tha t sexua l intercours e outside o f marriag e i s someho w wors e tha n th e caresse s tha t migh t lea d to intercourse . Psychoanalys t Phylli s Blanchar d believe d tha t inhibition s against se x impulse s coul d creat e a "se x tension " fo r wome n tha t woul d find n o relief , eve n i n marriage . "Ther e i s stil l a n appallin g mas s o f young people, " warne d birt h contro l reforme r Mar y War e Dennett , "who ar e enmeshe d i n th e wretche d clutte r o f a stal e an d nast y under current o f se x though t an d feeling , an d wh o vibrat e betwee n ignoran t fear an d turgi d allure." 36 Both Dennet t an d Blanchar d hope d tha t a s moder n marriage s em braced equalit y i n sexua l affectio n th e expressiv e independenc e o f th e sexual revolutio n woul d becom e th e standar d fo r "mate d lives. " Never theless, prerevolutio n sexua l moralit y playe d a n importan t an d ofte n a leading rol e i n married sex . In Hamilton's 192 9 study , onl y fourteen ou t of on e hundre d wome n recalle d tha t "pleasur e predominated " i n thei r first experienc e o f sex . Thirty-tw o fel t disappointed , twenty-tw o experi enced littl e o r n o pleasure , an d eleve n remembere d i t a s painful . A s w e saw in the las t chapter, Glady s Penro d dreade d th e prospect o f giving u p "her girlhoo d t o becom e th e possessio n o f a man , hi s b y ever y right , t o cherish o r t o defile." 37

ioo The

Flapper Wife

Young wive s who faile d t o satisf y thei r husband' s o r their ow n sexua l needs foun d stron g cultura l message s tellin g the m tha t the y lacke d ful l mental o r physica l health . On e advic e wor k o n Love and Happiness lamented tha t col d women were victims of an outdated moralit y impose d on the m b y "psychopathi c an d man-hatin g mothers. " Glady s Bel l Pen rod wondere d i f sexua l failur e mean t a physical deformit y requirin g sur gery. Wome n migh t als o com e t o believ e tha t the y ha d becom e th e source o f sexua l maladjustment . Frigidit y becam e th e summar y ter m fo r any problem i n the psychologica l o r medica l live s of women tha t robbe d them o r thei r husband s o f sexua l pleasure . Wilhel m Stekel , whos e tw o volumes o n th e topi c appeare d i n 1926 , asserted tha t "th e most frequen t of th e sex-disease s o f wome n i s frigidity." H e gav e as a scientific conclu sion tha t fort y t o fifty percen t o f wome n suffere d fro m it. 38 Hamilton' s study o f marriag e place d frigidit y withi n a broader rang e o f sexual problems fo r wome n characterize d b y inadequate orgasm . Almos t hal f o f th e women i n th e stud y fel l int o th e category . H e conclude d that , "Unles s the se x ac t end s i n a full y releasing , full y terminat e clima x i n a t leas t 2 0 percent o f copulations ther e is likely to b e trouble ahead. " Th e marriage , of course , may suffer . Th e wome n themselve s wil l likel y experience rest lessness an d tension ; o f th e forty-si x wome n considere d inadequat e i n orgasm, twent y ha d bee n diagnose d a t som e tim e a s "seriousl y psycho neurotic." 39 Companionship and Role Confusion Consumption an d sexua l pleasur e wer e t o suppor t a n affectionat e com panionship betwee n husban d an d wife , " a partnershi p dea l betwee n in dividuals o f equa l personality, " a s on e woma n i n th e 1910 s terme d it . The increasin g proportio n o f wome n wh o marrie d betwee n 189 0 an d 1920 accompanie d th e widesprea d acceptanc e o f a "democratic " mode l of marriage i n which husban d an d wif e sharec j equally i n the cares of th e household. Jus t a s mor e wome n foun d professiona l possibilitie s outsid e the hom e b y th e tur n o f th e century , som e suburba n me n becam e at tracted t o a n idea l o f "domesti c masculinity " tha t value d tim e spen t a t home wit h wif e an d childre n rathe r tha n amon g mal e friend s an d col leagues. Periodica l literatur e b y th e 1920 s encourage d greate r intimac y and expressivenes s o f feeling s betwee n th e marrie d partner s alon g wit h appropriate emotiona l management . Marrie d lov e would ris e on a foun dation o f mutualit y an d companionship. 40 Eugenicis t an d marriag e ad -

The Flapper Wife 10

1

viser Pau l Popeno e stresse d bot h comradeshi p an d equality—marriage s run o n a "fifty-fifty basis " were happy i n 8 7 percent o f cases he surveyed. For me n an d wome n alike , the idea l o f moder n marriag e offere d friend ship a s wel l a s affection , emotiona l expressivenes s a s wel l a s physica l pleasure.41 As wit h financial crisi s an d sexua l failure , wome n ofte n appeare d i n the popula r medi a o f th e 1920 s an d 1930 s a s th e principl e reaso n tha t companionship failed . " I lik e t o g o t o dance s an d parties, " a youn g flapper wif e wrot e t o Margare t Sanger , "an d hav e innocen t flirtations . I like pretty clothe s an d admiration . M y husban d canno t understan d wh y at m y ag e I a m s o frivolous. " Novelis t Elino r Gly n mourne d "youn g men unde r thirt y tie d an d boun d t o impossibl e youn g women " becaus e they coul d no t muste r th e wil l t o "resis t th e passio n i n it s first stages. " A Good Housekeeping articl e pointe d ou t tha t marriag e gav e wome n everything the y wan t i n life— a hom e an d children . Men , o n th e othe r hand, los e thei r freedo m i n marriag e an d a t hom e don' t eve n hav e a closet, sometime s no t eve n a chair , t o cal l thei r own . N o wonde r the y take s o little interes t i n the hom e an d th e children. 42 Advice literature frequentl y gav e women th e responsibility fo r makin g the idea l wor k o r makin g i t fit th e realit y o f marrie d life . Margare t Sanger believe d tha t wome n ha d t o "kee p romanc e aliv e i n spit e o f th e influence o f th e prosai c demand s o f everyda y life. " Anothe r adviso r of fered detaile d instruction s o n jus t tha t matter , plu s tips o n sexua l attrac tiveness an d househol d finances. Columnis t Ann e Hirs t believe d tha t th e man yo u marr y ma y no t b e the ma n yo u though t yo u wer e marrying . If so, then "adap t yoursel f t o thi s ne w bein g an d mak e fo r hi m th e kind o f home h e wants . I f yo u do , he'l l sta y i n it. " Doroth y Di x wen t eve n further i n suggestin g alteration s i n the companionate ideal . She provided many caution s fo r marrie d couples , suggestin g tha t intimac y coul d be come a problem . Me n wan t t o b e "treate d a s goo d fellows " bu t the y also "enjo y bein g bamboozle d b y wome n wh o tur n ou t a nic e artisti c job." Spouse s shoul d b e goo d t o on e anothe r bu t the y als o hav e t o observe limits . Otherwis e the y wil l encourag e weaknes s an d selfishnes s in th e other . Di x considere d jealous y a for m o f insanity , roote d i n th e delusion tha t "an y ma n o r woma n . . . can suppl y anothe r individual' s whole nee d o f huma n companionship." 43 Most middle-clas s wome n bega n marriage , a t least , wit h mor e fait h in th e companionat e idea l tha n Di x had . Yet , whethe r the y believe d i n bamboozling thei r husbands , o r i n bolsterin g thei r self-esteem , o r in pro-

io2 The

Flapper Wife

viding th e perfec t domesti c situatio n fo r them , wome n foun d themselve s responsible fo r th e success of companionate marriage s and yet dependen t upon husband s wh o ofte n lacke d a clear recognition o f and commitmen t to thei r ow n roles. 44 Wome n i n widel y disparat e socia l setting s foun d themselves distresse d a t behavio r o f thei r husbands ' tha t the y coul d no t understand an d seemingl y coul d no t control . Tw o week s afte r he r wed ding lon e Robinso n wrot e tha t sh e ha d begu n t o fee l "tha t I a m noth ing." He r husband , Joe , a n arden t Communist , discusse d politic s wit h guests a t dinner . " I find mysel f settin g th e table, cooking th e dinner , an d washing th e dishe s a s though I were no t present , a s far a s th e other s ar e concerned." Withi n a fe w week s o f marriag e Isabell e McNeli s Sickle r spent he r first nigh t alone . Othe r suc h night s followed , an d Isabelle' s patience wit h he r husband' s absence s shortened , especiall y afte r sh e be came pregnant . Doroth y Thompson , stil l yearnin g fo r a romanti c part nership, despaire d o f th e vagarie s o f Sinclai r Lewis' s behavior . " I wan t to writ e yo u a lov e letter, " sh e wrote , "bu t I can't. . . . I t woul d b e lik e writing t o someon e imaginary . D o yo u exist , an d ar e you you , an d wha t is you? I have know n s o many yous." 45 Fixing Modern Marriage For women , moder n marriag e prove d almos t impossibl y complicated . Although popula r author s assume d tha t marriag e provide d wome n wit h their mos t cherishe d desires , earl y researc h int o marriag e foun d hus bands mor e satisfie d wit h marriag e tha n wives . Expert s advise d som e form o f emotiona l management . "I f you r husban d seem s to be unreason able," wrot e on e columnist , "pu t yoursel f i n hi s plac e befor e yo u sas s him back , an d perhap s you'l l find h e ha s a perfec t righ t t o as k wha t h e does." Or , perhap s couple s neede d t o reduc e thei r relianc e o n th e vola tility o f romance . Psychologis t Elto n Mayo , lik e othe r "rational " critic s of marriage, rejected romance : love was "a n ailmen t of adolescence" and warned tha t th e it "must b e got over" befor e th e real marriage can begin . "Persons becom e attache d t o dogs , cats, furniture an d wha t not, " wrot e one physician. Marriag e ha d les s to d o with lov e than wit h "admiration , respect, association , mutua l interests , reciproca l assistance , attachmen t and becomin g accustome d t o eac h other." 46 Both th e defender s an d th e critic s o f marriag e urge d structura l changes. Judg e Be n Lindse y coine d th e ter m "companionat e marriage "

The Flapper Wife 10

3

to refe r t o hi s ideal o f a trial marriag e tha t childles s couple s coul d easil y end. This would hel p young people deal with the complexity o f courtshi p and mak e marriag e mor e likel y t o succeed . Lindsey' s ide a o f tria l mar riage inspire d attack s fro m conservative s bu t als o attracte d interes t an d often suppor t fro m writer s concerne d abou t marriage . Behavioris t Joh n Watson offere d a simila r ide a i n "progressiv e marriage." 47 Although example s o f actua l tria l marriage s ar e difficul t t o find, th e concept appeale d t o man y women . Actres s Ilka Chas e approve d o f thos e couples wh o "believ e i n a tryou t befor e th e Ne w Yor k opening . The y . . . consider a pi g i n a pok e a n unnecessar y ris k unde r an y circum stances." Chas e believe d tha t couple s wh o live d togethe r befor e forma l marriage acte d ou t o f "commo n sense, " an d th e idea l o f tria l marriag e appealed strongl y t o reaso n an d t o a n objectiv e vie w o f marriage . Mar tha L a veil, wh o believe d tha t psycholog y an d eugenic s hel d "th e futur e of th e worl d i n thei r hands, " believe d tha t marriag e shoul d onl y exis t for havin g children an d onl y be available "t o th e physically and mentall y fit. . . . Any othe r relatio n shoul d b e sanctione d outside o f marriage." 48 Lavell, however , wrot e i n th e privac y o f he r diar y an d apparentl y never followe d he r ow n permissiv e formula . Th e ne w moralit y fo r mid dle-class wome n include d tria l marriag e fo r onl y th e mos t radical , an d sometimes no t eve n fo r them . Jessie Lloyd , a journalist an d supporte r o f labor, like d th e ide a o f allowin g couple s t o tr y lif e togethe r befor e mar riage. "Giv e the m a quie t year , I thought , t o se e i f they' d mak e it , an d then, i f the y did , celebrat e wit h a bi g housewarming." A radical herself , and th e daughte r o f radica l (an d divorced ) parents , sh e ha d grow n u p hearing fre e lov e idea s discusse d wit h approval . Ye t sh e kne w tha t nei ther o f he r parent s woul d stan d fo r a fre e lov e unio n fo r her . Whe n sh e and radica l journalis t Harve y O'Conne r bega n thei r lif e together , the y lived together onl y until he could gai n a divorce, then saile d to Baltimor e where the y coul d b e married mor e quickl y tha n i n New York. 49 Even thoug h tria l marriag e stil l "floute d socia l standards " -i n th e 1920s an d 1930s , middle-clas s marriag e continue d t o chang e i n th e di rection urge d b y Lindse y an d Watson . Whe n sh e sa w th e movi e Companionate Marriage i n Glen s Falls , Ne w York , i n 1929 , fourteen-year old Edyth e Weiner wrot e tha t i t might "b e al l right fo r som e people, bu t even i f I a m old-fashioned , I prefe r th e ol d kin d an d a quic k divorc e i f you're unhappy. " Durin g th e 1920 s th e growin g divorc e rat e ofte n ap peared a s proof o f wha t V . F . Calverto n calle d "th e bankruptc y o f mar -

io4 The

Flapper Wife

riage." In 1887 , Calverton wrote , one marriage i n 17. 3 ende d in divorce. In 192 4 i t was on e i n 6.9 . As Calverto n recognized , divorc e di d i n prac tice what Lindse y proposed tha t tria l marriag e woul d do. 50 No sweepin g legislativ e change s mad e divorc e readil y availabl e b y 1920. Throughou t th e decad e th e stat e o f Ne w Yor k grante d divorc e only i n case s o f witnesse d adultery—th e "delict o mus t b e graphicall y flagrante," a s Ilk a Chas e recalled . Me n an d wome n wh o n o longe r wished t o b e marrie d ha d t o find friend s t o commi t perjur y an d the n submit themselve s t o "publi c humiliation. " Ye t i f th e courtroo m mean t public humiliation , divorc e itsel f carrie d les s stigm a fo r mos t member s of th e middl e clas s b y th e 1920s . Th e chang e seem s t o hav e tak e plac e in a singl e generation . Pear l Buck' s brother , eleve n year s olde r tha n she , separated fro m hi s wife bu t waite d fo r years , until afte r hi s parents died , to divorc e her . The sharpes t jum p i n the divorc e rate took plac e betwee n 1910 an d 1920 , from 4. 5 pe r 1,00 0 t o y.y pe r i,ooo. 51 As suggested b y the teen-age d comment s o f Edyth e Weiner, th e risin g divorce rat e represente d changin g expectation s abou t th e goal s o f mar riage an d als o reflecte d th e widesprea d acceptanc e o f divorc e a s a solu tion fo r faile d marriages . Divorc e mad e moder n marriag e possible , giv ing women a sens e that the y coul d stil l find happines s an d fulfillin g live s if marriage di d not giv e them the love and companionshi p the y expected . Prior t o he r ow n marriage , Glady s Penro d considere d Lindsey' s idea l o f trial marriag e an d bot h befor e an d afte r he r weddin g contemplate d th e possibility o f divorce. 52 Many o f the women whos e paper s have reveale d so muc h abou t th e inne r live s o f middle-clas s wome n foun d divorc e th e only solutio n t o difficul t marriages . Severa l divorce d mor e tha n once , lone Robinson , a s w e hav e seen , marrie d an d divorce d twic e b y ag e twenty-four. Doroth y Thompso n marrie d thre e times, Beth Twiggar an d Marjorie Kinna n Rawling s eac h divorce d once . Carolin e Gordo n di vorced Alle n Tat e i n 1946 , the n late r remarrie d hi m and , year s later , divorced hi m again . Yet marriag e remaine d a stron g cultura l valu e fo r women . I t held th e promise o f ful l selfhood . Eve n i f cultura l attitude s treate d divorc e muc h more lightly , wome n wh o experience d i t fel t i t a s a persona l failur e an d profound loss . Marjorie Kinna n Rawling s looke d bac k o n he r marriag e as "fourtee n year s o f Hell. " I n th e end , sh e ha d t o brea k fre e "fro m th e feeling o f a viciou s han d alway s a t m y throat , o r o f goin g dow n i n complete physica l an d menta l collapse. " "Som e hour s I wis h I wer e dead," lon e Robinso n wrot e a s he r secon d marriag e collapsed . I t ha d

The Flapper Wife 10

5

failed i n spit e o f he r effort s t o mak e i t wor k o n an y basis , "t o adap t myself t o him , t o buil d m y lif e aroun d his." 53 Even thoug h socia l scienc e idealization s an d persona l hope s rarel y included divorc e a s par t o f th e moder n marriage , th e hig h valu e place d on marrie d sex , consumerism , an d companionshi p almos t guarantee d that man y marriage s woul d fal l short . Women' s psychologica l develop ment ma y hav e playe d a rol e a s well . Curren t theorie s o n women' s de velopment, whethe r the y rel y o n intrapsychi c processe s o r cultura l forces, vie w America n wome n a s flourishin g withi n a dens e networ k o f relationships. B y th e 1920s , th e marriag e idea l ha d becom e thoroughl y modern, eschewin g women' s network s i n favo r o f a hierarchica l mode l in whic h on e friendship—betwee n husban d an d wife—becam e para mount. 54 Withou t th e supportiv e relationship s o f a n earlie r generation , modern wome n relie d upo n a companionate idea l fo r fulfillmen t o f thei r most cherishe d desires . In practice , thi s mean t relyin g o n husband s wh o might no t provid e th e incom e t o mee t thei r housekeepin g need s o r th e partnership an d companionshi p t o mee t thei r emotiona l needs . Som e women woul d tr y i n vai n t o mak e difficul t marriage s work . Other s would succee d i n spit e o f thei r problems , althoug h generall y b y movin g away fro m widel y hel d cultura l ideals . Tw o wome n offe r contrastin g insights int o moder n marriage . Living Marriage: Two Contrasting Experiences Winifred Willi s wa s bor n i n 190 2 i n Brooklyn . Healt h problem s inter rupted he r schooling , an d afte r grad e five sh e receive d littl e forma l edu cation. Instead , sh e rea d voraciousl y an d committe d hersel f t o writing . She kept journal s fo r years , but he r survivin g journals begi n i n 1923 , the year sh e publishe d he r first shor t story . Alon g wit h literar y succes s th e year hel d emotiona l turmoi l wit h th e en d o f a longstandin g romanc e with Bil l Rawlin s an d th e beginnin g o f he r courtshi p wit h Lori n "Tommy" Thompson . Withi n month s Winifre d Willi s realize d sh e wa s in lov e with Tommy. 55 "We ar e soo n t o b e married," sh e wrote a few week s later . " I di d no t know lov e could b e s o perfect, an d ye t s o quietly certain. " Fo r Winifre d Willis, passionat e attractio n t o Tomm y an d marriag e carrie d th e possi bility of renewing an d remakin g he r life. The prospect o f such a powerfu l passion, an d o f th e change s tha t i t implied , frightene d he r a s wel l a s drew he r towar d it . "Ho w terribl e tha t h e i s all , alll" sh e wrot e shortl y

4.1 Winifre d Willi s in Maine i n 1923 . The picture was taken abou t th e time he r diary open s (earlie r entrie s wer e los t o r destroyed) . Schlesinge r Library , Rad cliffe College .

The Flapper Wife 10

7

before he r marriage . "Hi s war m lov e enfold s me , envelop s me , stand s between m e & th e col d lonelines s o f life. " Whe n the y marrie d o n Ma y 24, 1924 , Willi s recorde d th e even t i n word s strikingl y simila r t o lon e Robinson's: "Thi s i s th e attainmen t o f happines s an d th e beginnin g o f life."56 The first month s o f he r marriag e stoo d fo r Winifre d Willi s a s th e fulfillment o f lov e an d life . "Marrie d lif e i s a headlong rush , intersperse d with oase s o f rich , unbelievabl e peace. " A t time s the y ha d day s o n en d of closenes s an d happines s tha t Winifre d relished . A t othe r times , how ever, sh e fel t a distanc e o r tensio n betwee n the m tha t sh e too k a s a sig n of som e shortcomin g o n he r part . Tw o month s afte r th e weddin g sh e wrote o f he r struggle s "t o conque r myself , m y nerves , m y habits , m y selfishness, m y irritabl e instinct s o f th e recluse. " Sh e wanted , i n fact , t o develop a n entirel y ne w temperament , on e bette r suite d t o th e worldl y success tha t Tomm y looke d for . A s sh e wrot e tw o day s later , sh e live d to "fulfil l Lorin' s idea l o f al l h e ha s eve r wanted m e to be." 57 In th e are a o f househol d management , th e adjustment s tha t Winifre d Willis adopted prove d remarkabl y simila r t o those made b y Gloria Greg ory, the fictional flappe r wife . In spit e of Tommy's well-to-d o famil y an d his jo b a s a bon d salesman , th e youn g coupl e foun d themselve s face d with financial stringency . Whe n the y sa t dow n t o g o ove r finances afte r a fe w month s o f marriage , Winifre d wa s shocke d t o realiz e tha t the y spent twic e wha t Tomm y earned . Tommy , sh e recorded , kne w thi s al l along bu t wante d t o mak e he r realiz e i t withou t simpl y insistin g o n hi s way. Lik e th e flapper wife , Winifre d bega n a s a spendthrif t bu t the n quickly recognize d th e erro r o f he r spendin g habit s an d reformed . B y seeking a fruga l lif e tha t balance d th e couple' s desir e fo r leisur e an d status wit h thei r financial means , Willis hoped t o creat e th e kin d o f coz y home tha t shoul d hav e allowe d affectionat e companionshi p t o thrive . In the month s tha t followe d the y restraine d thei r spendin g an d change d their entertainmen t habits . Sh e recorde d wit h satisfaction : "No w w e g o to plays , din e ou t occasionally , hav e laundr y & house-cleanin g don e regularly (no t b y me!!)& , withou t bein g undul y extravagant , d o prett y much a s we please." She believed tha t thi s allowed he r to becom e " a ga y & happ y companio n wit h nothin g o n m y mind— & ver y littl e i n it." 58 Winifred Willi s understoo d th e fabl e o f th e flapper wif e an d benefitte d from it s moral . Financial concern s tha t seeme d s o readily resolved would retur n later , aggravating bigge r problem s fo r Winifre d an d Tommy . Winifre d ex -

io8 The

Flapper Wife

pected a lovin g partnership , an d i n moment s o f passionat e affectio n fo r Tommy sh e readil y accepte d th e nee d fo r persona l chang e t o mak e tha t possible. He r feeling s varie d widely , however , a s thei r relationshi p swung betwee n lovin g closenes s an d clashe s ove r emotiona l hunger . " A regrettable inciden t ou t i n Westchester, whe n I kicked hi s shins blac k &C blue &c flun g m y ha t ove r a cliff , brough t m e awak e t o certai n childis h tendencies i n mysel f whic h i f no t see n & conquered , woul d eventuall y end an y marriage—even ours. " Although sh e readily blame d herself , she also foun d hersel f frustrate d b y Tommy' s reserve , "hi s neglect , hi s lon g silences, his curt brevity." 59 For Winifre d th e companionat e idea l mean t a unio n o f mutua l an d unwavering love . "Each bon d tha t comes to strengthen m y hold o n Lori n and hi s o n me , make s m e happier . Th e perfec t peac e o f love , th e sens e of belonging , th e absolut e willingnes s t o belon g forever—tha t i s happi ness." Yet , tim e an d again , the y seeme d t o los e thei r chanc e fo r happi ness. Sh e searche d fo r explanation s i n gende r differences—"me n ar e more stolid. " The y canno t b e lover s a s wel l a s husbands , an d a s hus bands the y "as k physica l lov e & pleasan t companionship. " Betwee n Tommy's approac h t o marriag e an d he r womanl y approac h lie s "a stat e of desir e unlimited. " Th e ga p betwee n thei r understanding s cam e hom e to he r a s a woundin g criticis m fro m Tomm y tha t sh e spen t he r whol e day waitin g fo r hi m t o com e home . "Wha t h e doesn't understan d i s that if I had ever y hou r o f ever y da y packe d wit h interests , I would stil l wai t all da y fo r th e hou r o f hi s comin g home . Doe s h e wan t m e t o b e inde pendent o f him ? I can't be ! He i s all I have in the whole bi g lonely hellis h world." 60 He r longin g fo r passionat e togethernes s woul d continu e t o plague her , an d th e inabilit y o f he r marriag e t o giv e i t to he r mean t tha t she remained unsatisfied . The lov e tha t Winifre d fel t fo r Tommy , th e thril l tha t hi s presenc e could giv e her , seem s t o hav e remaine d withou t physica l expression . During thei r passionat e romanc e Tomm y an d Winifre d spen t man y nights sleepin g together , ye t Winifre d kep t he r virginit y unti l marriage . When sh e finally surrendere d t o he r husband , th e resul t wa s "cold , sick , disappointment, th e sens e o f failure , an d o f havin g faile d hi m who m I loved." Althoug h couple s generally worke d ou t sexua l issue s in the earl y months o f marriage , the problem s tha t Winifre d experience d i n her first, unsatisfactory intercours e continue d t o plagu e he r an d le d t o furthe r problems i n he r relationshi p wit h Tommy . H e coul d no t giv e he r th e

The Flapper Wife 10

9

emotional warmt h tha t sh e craved , an d sh e seeme d unabl e t o giv e hi m the sexua l satisfactio n tha t h e hope d for . Winifre d place d th e blam e o n the sexua l moralit y tha t denie d girl s an d youn g wome n "casual , sexua l experiences" lik e thos e sh e believe d me n enjoyed . Anothe r youn g woman describe d a frien d whos e problem s sounde d remarkabl y simila r to Winifred's : "Sai d sh e was a virgin whe n sh e married an d no w wishe d she hadn't been." 61 The sexua l an d emotiona l problem s face d b y Winifre d an d Tomm y grew more destructiv e a s their livin g situation becam e more difficult. Th e remaining year s o f thei r marriag e showe d tha t i t was no t a flapper men tality bu t image s o f a worl d o f economi c possibilitie s tha t create d th e major financial problem s fo r Winifre d an d Tommy . Th e coupl e yearne d to shar e mor e full y i n th e decade' s prosperity . Tomm y believe d h e de served bette r tha n hi s $6 0 a wee k salary , an d th e coupl e investe d a sizable gif t fro m Tommy' s fathe r i n oi l an d radi o stocks . They dreame d of a hom e awa y fro m Ne w Yor k an d a lif e o f industriou s comfor t lik e the on e Tommy's fathe r an d mothe r lived . The vagaries o f the economy , however, woul d ro b the m o f eve n th e fruga l pleasure s the y ha d earned . Their investmen t o f th e gif t fro m Tommy' s fathe r turne d int o a ba d speculation, an d soo n th e coupl e ha d t o mov e ou t o f thei r ow n apart ment an d liv e with Winifred's mother . I n the following yea r Tommy los t his jo b whe n hi s firm brok e up . Eve n thoug h Tomm y foun d a ne w job , he becam e engrosse d i n hi s wor k an d Winifre d fel t a distanc e growin g between them . I n an y event , th e jo b prove d short-lived , an d th e coupl e moved fro m on e difficul t livin g situatio n t o another , wit h Tommy' s for tunes apparentl y headin g steadil y downward . In November o f 192 7 Willis wrot e tha t the y ha d returne d t o Ne w York , "dea d broke , n o jo b a s yet. My hand s ar e ful l wit h child-car e an d housework." 62 Financial hardship s too k a heav y tol l o n th e couple . Unemploye d much o f th e time , Tomm y spen t hi s day s lookin g fo r work . Tomm y became resentfu l o f lif e wit h he r mothe r an d the n siste r an d accuse d Winifred o f bein g to o dependen t o n him . Althoug h Winifre d fel t th e sting o f poverty , he r reactio n t o thei r situatio n turne d fa r mor e o n th e changes i n thei r relationship . "Onl y fo r hi m d o I wan t money, " sh e wrote, "s o tha t I may alway s see m beautifu l an d well-dresse d an d attrac tive to him—s o tha t h e ma y neve r tir e o f me! " Lik e Glady s Penrod , sh e believed sh e could kee p romance aliv e with the appropriate personal car e and clothing . Ye t a s Winifre d foun d hersel f tor n betwee n car e fo r he r

n o The

Flapper Wife

child an d fo r othe r member s o f he r family , sh e als o suffere d fro m a growing distanc e betwee n hersel f an d Tommy . He r marriag e ende d i n 1928, followe d onl y a fe w month s late r b y her ow n nervou s collapse. 63 For Winifre d Willis , the promise s o f moder n marriag e prove d fals e i n almost ever y possibl e way . Althoug h sh e coul d surrende r hersel f t o a n all-consuming passio n fo r he r husband , th e sexua l satisfactio n an d com panionate partnershi p a t th e heart o f modern marriag e faile d t o flourish . She foun d he r ow n sexua l respons e lacking , an d sh e coul d find n o wa y to resolv e th e distanc e betwee n he r emotiona l need s an d he r husband' s emotional reserve . Th e financial difficultie s the y face d aggravate d thei r other problem s an d mad e th e marriag e unworkable . Onl y year s later , i n another marriage , woul d Winifre d Willi s find th e companionshi p an d passionate affectio n sh e thought he r first marriag e woul d provide . Dorothy Smith , bor n i n Chicag o i n 1906 , wa s no t a s wel l integrate d into th e yout h cultur e o f th e da y a s som e o f th e othe r wome n w e hav e looked at . Sh e recorded a danc e durin g he r tee n year s a s highly unsatis factory. Th e interestin g boys , th e one s wh o attracte d her , di d no t see m to find he r attractive . Instead, sh e yearned fo r companionshi p wit h othe r girls an d looke d forwar d t o goin g t o a boardin g schoo l i n New Englan d as a n opportunit y t o find th e kin d o f friendshi p sh e longe d for . Eve n with femal e companions , however , Smit h seeme d t o hav e experience d trepidation. O n th e on e hand , sh e fel t he r desir e wa s s o stron g tha t i t would overwhel m he r friend , an d o n th e othe r sh e buil t u p wall s o f reserve tha t friend s foun d difficul t t o penetrate. 64 Smith accustome d hersel f t o me n onl y slowly . A n acquaintanc e wit h a marrie d ma n durin g summe r schoo l gav e he r opportunit y t o discove r new insight s abou t men , bu t sh e remained largel y aloo f fro m men . Afte r college, however , sh e wen t t o Pari s t o stud y compositio n wit h Nadi a Boulanger. Sh e looke d forwar d t o th e tri p a s a wa y o f breakin g fre e from th e mor e repressiv e aspect s o f he r Purita n upbringing . I t seem s t o have worked . I n Pari s sh e me t an d becam e friendl y wit h man y men . I n particular, sh e becam e acquainte d wit h Davi d Dushkin , a Russia n Je w whose famil y ha d move d t o America . Th e tw o bega n a friendshi p tha t would continu e afte r the y returne d t o th e United States. 65 As she an d Dushki n gre w closer , Doroth y Smit h foun d hersel f unabl e to understan d he r ow n feelings . Sh e experience d unspecifie d problem s that le d her to psychoanalysis. As her analysis progressed, sh e came mor e and mor e t o se e Dushki n a s a n objec t o f love . A s sh e worke d thoug h conflicting feeling s towar d he r parents , Doroth y experience d a new free -

4.2 Doroth y Smit h Dushkin , wit h daughte r Lelah . Sophi a Smit h Collection , Smith College .

i i 2 The

Flapper Wife

dom i n her emotional life . "David suddenl y appeare d mor e desirable an d I seemed t o want t o marry him. " Lik e other young women w e have seen, Dorothy experience d romanc e a s ambivalen t an d yet , i n th e end , con vincing: "Thi s ver y war m tendernes s I fee l fo r hi m mus t resembl e lov e pretty closely . Marriag e wit h hi m seem s desirabl e an d to o goo d t o miss." 66 As he r marriag e approached , Doroth y hope d fo r greate r freedo m o f artistic expression , i n part becaus e sh e would n o longe r b e teaching i n a traditional schoo l an d i n par t becaus e Davi d wa s a musicia n wh o kep t company with othe r artists : "I hope next year bein g with David & seein g more artis t type s I shall b e free r & mor e eage r t o create . I belong t o th e creators no t t o schools. " This speak s to he r expectatio n tha t i n marriag e she woul d fulfil l he r identity . However , i n contras t t o othe r wome n fo r whom marriag e itsel f seeme d th e fulfillmen t o f a woman' s identity , fo r Dorothy i t wa s th e particula r lifestyl e tha t sh e believe d sh e an d Davi d would establis h togethe r tha t woul d allo w he r t o b e mor e full y herself . Dorothy feare d th e confinemen t o f traditio n an d convention . " I hav e a horror o f growin g lik e mos s o n it s wall s a s thos e abou t me. " Sh e be lieved tha t David' s opennes s t o ne w experience s woul d preven t he r fro m becoming stagnan t i n marriage. 67 As a newlywed Doroth y fel t pleasure and satisfactio n i n David's affec tion an d i n he r sens e o f liberatio n fro m bot h conventiona l attitude s an d artistic inhibitions : "Bein g Doroth y Dushki n i s a glorious pleasure an d a satisfying one . It's strang e tha t I feel mor e natura l wit h tha t nam e tha n I did wit h m y ol d one." 68 Lik e othe r newl y marrie d women , Doroth y Dushkin experience d th e hal o effec t o f marriage . Ye t i t persisted fo r he r as sh e and Davi d becam e working a s well as loving partners . Dorothy's marriage , begu n wit h suc h tentativeness , woul d depar t from th e companionat e idea l i n man y importan t ways . Sh e love d he r husband, bu t sh e never longe d t o los e herself i n his personality, a s Willis had, an d i n fac t sh e maintaine d he r emotiona l autonomy . I n contras t t o Willis, Dorothy worke d wit h he r husban d i n th e schoo l tha t the y estab lished. Sh e coul d se e hersel f a s competen t an d productive , somethin g other wome n coul d easil y los e withi n moder n marriage . However , Do rothy als o longe d fo r an d nurture d relationship s wit h othe r women , in tense an d eve n romanti c relationship s tha t provide d he r emotiona l satis factions tha t sh e di d no t gai n o r eve n expec t fro m David . In he r marriage , Doroth y retaine d a sens e o f individualit y an d per sonal space . When sh e struggled ove r her goal to becom e less narcissistic,

The Flapper Wife 11

3

she decide d tha t sh e shoul d submerg e hersel f int o somethin g apar t fro m herself. Bu t sh e ha d troubl e decidin g wha t tha t woul d be : "No w i n choosing th e thin g int o whic h I shoul d b e submerged , I a m no t a mis sionary o f an y sort— I hav e n o flamin g cause . Als o I hav e n o lov e o f persons sufficien t t o occup y m e entirely—no r n o religiou s ritua l t o ab sorb me—n o on e thin g wil l do . I mus t I thin k resolv e mysel f t o bein g absorbed i n whateve r turn s up." 69 What turne d u p was her children, a music school, friends, an d a warm but neve r all-consumin g lov e for he r husband . Doroth y dre w confidenc e and satisfactio n fro m a harmonious relationshi p wit h David, with who m she continued t o shar e many interests , and a n invigorating an d smoothl y functioning business . I n th e first year s o f thei r marriage , sh e an d Davi d started thei r ow n musi c school , givin g lesson s an d concert s i n thei r home. Dorothy too k a relatively smal l role in the school i n its early years as the y struggle d t o launc h it . " I kee p o n th e sideline s an d hav e severa l private pian o pupil s a s wel l a s teachin g i n th e Montessor i Schoo l twic e a wee k singin g & rhythm." 70 As the schoo l grew , an d a s the Dushkin s continue d thei r ow n musica l creation, the y worke d closel y togethe r a s musicians , teachers , an d busi ness owners . Davi d initiate d discussion s wit h Doroth y ove r hi s school related concerns . Doroth y too k thi s companionshi p an d teamwor k a s a given. Afte r the y buil t an d move d int o a ne w hous e (wher e the y hel d their school ) Doroth y mor e explicitl y acknowledge d th e importanc e o f her contribution s a s he r husband' s counse l an d support . "M y day s ar e broken u p wit h a grea t variet y o f tasks . I kee p th e books , sen d bill s & pay them, overse e a lot of music arranging, orde r & examin e new music, discuss everythin g wit h David , answe r th e phone, teach 7 pupils, play i n orchestra & overse e th e hous e managemen t & th e babie s . . . remind David o f a hundred thing s h e must d o & bu y his clothing & se e that it' s kept clean , practice pian o & singing." 71 As the abov e passag e suggests , child car e remained Dorothy' s respon sibility, althoug h he r childre n neve r becam e her singl e purpose i n life. As with othe r aspect s o f her marriage, raising children fo r Doroth y Dushki n came a s par t o f a varie d lif e ful l o f man y commitments . Durin g he r second pregnanc y the y engage d a full-tim e nurs e wh o live d wit h the m through th e followin g year . The y als o ha d a live-i n maid . Whe n th e nurse ha d he r regula r da y off , Doroth y too k car e o f th e children . Sh e found thi s exhausting : "Tuesdays , Lena' s da y out , ar e hardes t fo r me — Children ar e nerve-wrackin g & : exhausting eve n whe n they'r e good . . . .

i i 4 The

Flapper Wife

It i s particularl y difficul t i n ou r househol d wit h s o muc h goin g o n tha t they mustn' t interfer e with." 72 Although sh e deepl y appreciate d th e satisfaction s o f he r hom e an d vocation, Doroth y als o recognize d tha t t o b e happy sh e needed a n emo tionally intimat e friend . Sh e didn' t believ e tha t suc h a friendshi p woul d threaten o r interfer e wit h he r marriage ; i n fac t sh e mention s David' s preoccupation wit h wor k a s th e reaso n tha t h e himsel f coul d no t fulfil l her nee d t o tal k freel y t o someon e wh o woul d listen . "Wh y shouldn' t I be abl e t o spea k clearl y &c unembarrasse d t o m y friends? " sh e wrot e i n the early years o f her marriage . Dorothy accepte d withou t self-doub t he r need fo r emotiona l intimacy . Sh e didn' t tak e fo r grante d tha t he r hus band woul d mee t thi s need , an d sh e didn' t experienc e he r longin g fo r attention an d companionshi p exclusivel y a s a longin g fo r David' s atten tion an d companionship . Sh e considered he r husban d a n intimat e frien d but no t a n exclusiv e one . The y sustaine d a companionabl e relationshi p but no t on e tha t full y matche d th e companionat e marriag e mode l o f romantic love , shared fun , an d emotiona l intimacy. 73 The distanc e tha t Doroth y Dushkin' s experienc e o f marrie d lov e maintained fro m th e popula r idea l o f companionat e marriag e als o sug gests th e rol e tha t se x playe d i n he r marriage . Althoug h sh e wrot e littl e about sex i n he r journal , sh e approache d se x wit h th e sam e realisti c expectations an d optimis m tha t sh e approache d he r emotiona l lif e wit h David an d wit h he r friends . Thei r love-making , a t first, prove d unsuc cessful. Unlik e Winifre d an d Tommy , whos e first attempt s a t love making presage d a n unsatisfyin g sex lif e fo r th e couple , Doroth y an d David foun d hel p an d reaso n t o expec t satisfyin g passion . Thei r honey moon tri p wa s t o Europe . O n boar d ship , afte r the y experience d "th e exhausting pai n &c thwarted effor t o f unrip e intercourse " Doroth y feared tha t sh e migh t b e "misforme d i n som e way , o r a coward. " Onc e in London , however , sh e an d Davi d visite d th e clini c o f th e well-know n sex adviser , Dr . Mari e Stopes . Someon e a t th e clini c sen t the m t o " a sympathetic & informe d doctor " wh o advise d the m tha t "i n som e case s the vagina doe s not yield readily" an d gav e them advic e about massagin g and exercisin g th e muscles . "Sinc e then, " sh e wrote , stil l o n he r honey moon, "thing s hav e bee n easier althoug h a s yet I've had n o enjoyment — I a m confiden t tha t tha t wil l com e i n goo d tim e fo r no w I know there' s nothing misforme d & rathe r bette r i n th e lon g run." 74 Se x contribute d to th e satisfactio n tha t Doroth y Dushki n fel t i n her marriage , yet i t doe s

The Flapper Wife 11

5

not see m t o hav e playe d th e gloriou s rol e tha t i t ofte n appeare d t o hol d in moder n marriage . Even afte r severa l year s o f marriage , Doroth y coul d write , "Ever y year ha s bee n a happ y on e sinc e ou r marriage , bu t I think thi s ha s bee n perhaps th e mos t eventfu l s o far." 75 Ye t th e happines s tha t Doroth y found ha d no t com e fro m matchin g he r lif e t o th e idea l o f moder n mar riage. I n a perceptiv e passag e i n 193 4 Doroth y examine d he r lif e b y comparing i t wit h th e lif e o f th e Victoria n spinster . " I ofte n wonde r i f I wouldn't hav e becom e lik e 's o & so ' i f I hadn't marrie d o r ha d th e ful l life I'v e had . Th e old-mai d prudishnes s coul d hav e easil y develope d i n me. Intolerances , nervou s self-justification , rigidit y o f variou s kind s &c emotional giddiness . I have grea t sympath y fo r girl s lef t unmarried . I so easily migh t hav e bee n such. " Doroth y kne w tha t he r upbringin g ha d allowed he r t o achiev e a n interio r an d creativ e life , bu t i t als o mad e i t difficult fo r he r t o embrac e a n activ e life . Marriag e mad e i t possibl e fo r her t o mak e a plac e fo r hersel f i n th e world , hav e a family , an d accep t the pleasure s th e worl d ha d t o offer . Sh e continued , reflectin g o n he r debt t o marriage , "Th e ver y bein g love d perso n i s noticeabl y mor e at tractive. I find les s & les s nee d t o justif y mysel f befor e others . I think I am as well adjusted emotionall y & mentall y a s I can be—granted certai n tendencies t o homo-sexuality. " Doroth y accepte d he r homoeroti c urge s even i f sh e pu t the m int o th e therapeuti c languag e sh e learne d a t Smit h College an d i n psychoanalysis . In mos t respect s sh e embrace d he r desir e for othe r wome n an d claime d i t a s part o f a ful l emotiona l life. 76 Whereas th e marriage s o f Winifre d Willi s an d Doroth y Smit h Dush kin contras t rathe r sharply , th e reason s fo r th e differences ar e har d t o discern. Bot h wome n wante d creativ e professiona l lives—Winifre d a s a writer, Doroth y a s a musician—an d bot h achieve d a degre e o f succes s in thei r chose n fields. Bot h wome n wer e introspectiv e an d considere d themselves somewha t somber . Neithe r seeme d destine d fo r a conven tional marriage . In th e end , however , i t seem s tha t Winifre d Willis' s attempt t o clai m a conventiona l lif e worke d badl y fo r he r wherea s Do rothy Smith' s difficultie s a s a youn g woma n i n formin g relationship s with me n prove d valuabl e t o he r i n th e lon g run . As we have seen , Winifred Willi s embraced th e romantic idea l of mar riage a s a fulfillmen t o f life . He r parent s ha d broke n of f thei r marriag e years earlier , an d bot h o f the m live d outsid e middle-clas s norms—he r mother attracte d youn g lovers , her fathe r drank. 77 Perhap s thi s adde d t o

n 6 The

Flapper Wife

Winifred's desir e t o fin d a solid , nonartisti c man , someon e fro m a well established famil y wh o coul d giv e he r a san e an d norma l life . Ye t th e marriage sh e learned t o expec t fro m he r culture , with warm companion ship an d comfortabl e surroundings , failed her . Tommy wa s not prepare d to return th e emotional closenes s that sh e expected an d craved . Financia l crisis dashe d thei r hopes . Wit h s o littl e i n thei r live s tha t matche d th e companionate ideal , they foun d marriag e unworkable . Dorothy Smith , o n th e othe r hand , ha d bee n muc h mor e tentativ e about romance . Sh e wante d lov e an d companionship , ye t sh e neve r seemed convince d tha t a n overpowerin g emotiona l experienc e woul d change he r life . Instead , Doroth y mad e a life wit h th e material s a t hand . She an d Davi d share d thei r lov e o f musi c an d thei r musi c school . I f he r role a s wife an d mothe r tende d t o tak e more o f he r time than he r profes sional pursuits , a t leas t sh e could fee l a connectio n t o he r artisti c callin g and t o he r husban d throug h he r teachin g an d composition . Perhap s Da vid Dushki n wa s bette r abl e t o giv e emotiona l warmt h tha n Tomm y Thompson. I t i s also importan t t o note , however, tha t Doroth y seem s t o have ha d eithe r lowe r o r mor e realisti c expectation s abou t th e warmt h she coul d expec t fro m he r husband . A s w e hav e seen , sh e expecte d a t least som e o f he r emotiona l need s t o b e me t throug h relation s wit h women. From thi s comparison , i t seem s tha t Winifred' s marriag e suffere d from he r relianc e o n bot h th e romanti c an d th e companionat e ideal , from a lack o f emotiona l satisfactio n fo r her , an d fro m a lack o f encour agement fo r he r creativ e work . In he r secon d marriage , to John Speakes , Winifred foun d bot h warmt h an d encouragemen t fo r he r wor k a s a writer. Sh e also foun d sexua l pleasur e i n her late r marriage . Perhaps he r relationship wit h Joh n wa s als o mor e realistic . Certainly , he r reflection s on he r marriag e t o Tomm y year s afterwar d see m t o indicat e tha t Wini fred ha d gaine d ne w insight s abou t he r emotiona l life—tha t sh e ha d expected to o muc h o f Tommy. 78 Althoug h th e singl e exampl e o f Wini fred Willi s ca n onl y b e suggestive , i t doe s see m t o suppor t Judg e Be n Lindsey's cal l fo r tria l marriages . Divorce , wit h al l it s trauma , seem s t o have give n wome n experience s t o mak e bette r marriage s an d t o modif y the companionat e idea l t o th e need s an d realitie s o f thei r ow n lives .

5 The Silver Cord

"One o f m y favorit e fancie s i s that durin g m y colleg e year s I have bee n training fo r parenthood, " Marth a Lavel l reflecte d durin g he r senio r yea r at th e Universit y o f Minnesota . Althoug h i n som e sens e Lavell' s fanc y held tru e fo r man y wome n wh o expecte d t o marr y durin g o r shortl y after thei r colleg e years, she did no t hav e husband huntin g i n mind whe n she wrot e abou t parenthood . Sh e referred , instead , t o he r trainin g i n psychology an d sociology . Marth a Lavel l dre w he r ideal s o f marriag e and famil y fro m he r readin g i n th e socia l science s o f th e lat e 1920 s an d from th e discussion s o n thes e subject s hel d i n he r classe s an d amon g he r friends. "M y ide a o f marriag e i s a unio n primaril y fo r th e purpos e o f having children, " sh e wrote . Reflectin g bot h a theoretica l radicalis m about se x an d he r fait h i n eugenics , sh e continue d tha t "An y othe r rela tion shoul d b e sanctione d outside o f marriage , bu t onl y th e physicall y and mentall y fi t wit h definit e wis h fo r childre n shoul d b e allowe d t o marry." LavelPs speculation s gav e a larg e measur e o f responsibilit y t o societ y and eve n th e stat e fo r th e proper rearin g o f children . Prospective parent s would receiv e "specia l trainin g i n th e ar t o f carin g for , teaching , an d bringing u p children. " Sh e looke d forwar d t o a n idylli c settin g fo r he r own family , "somewher e i n th e country , i n a larg e hous e wit h sleeping porches, surrounde d b y acre s o f wil d land. " Th e famil y woul d b e large : "half a doze n childre n o f ou r own , plu s hal f a doze n mor e belongin g t o other people , orphan s perhaps. " Th e childre n woul d stud y a t home , where Lavel l woul d encourag e thei r curiosity . "Cultivat e a tast e fo r sci entific research , a n interes t i n ma n an d thi s worl d h e live s in , a lov e o f 117

118 The

Silver Cord

beauty an d a n idea l o f servic e t o humanity , an d yo u hav e create d a n individual wh o wil l find th e worl d goo d an d lif e wort h living . Suc h a home, preparin g suc h citizen s fo r th e world , i s m y visio n o f th e goo d life." Marth a Lavel l obviousl y idealize d motherhood , ye t he r visio n in cludes few o f the traditional activitie s of the mother, an d her home seem s more lik e a socia l welfar e agenc y tha n a typica l family . Sh e wrot e late r that sh e recognize d tha t man y o f he r idea s "ar e wil d an d impractical , and perhap s impossible, " althoug h sh e stil l longe d fo r a husban d an d children. Behin d Lavell' s idea l lie s a growin g relianc e o n expertis e i n decisions abou t chil d rearin g i n th e 1920s , an d a relate d distrus t o f th e family, an d especiall y o f motherhood. 1 In 192 7 the term "silve r cord " entere d America n speec h as a referenc e to th e tigh t an d sometime s unbreakabl e connection s tha t mother s ha d for thei r children . Th e pejorativ e referenc e cam e fro m th e title o f Sidne y Howard's pla y i n whic h Mrs . Phelp s entertain s he r tw o adul t son s an d the wif e o f on e so n an d th e fiance o f th e other . Dave , the olde r son , ha s brought hi s ne w wif e hom e t o mee t hi s mother . H e an d Christin a me t and marrie d whil e abroa d an d planne d a shor t visi t wit h Mrs . Phelp s before continuin g o n t o Ne w Yor k Cit y wher e bot h planne d t o pursu e their professions , hi s architecture , her s researc h biology . Th e younge r son, Robert, ha s invited hi s fiance, Hester, to spen d the weekend. Withi n minutes o f th e play' s opening , i t i s clea r tha t Mrs . Phelp s approve s o f neither youn g woman . Heste r sh e despise s fo r he r flappe r ways , Chris tina fo r he r moder n ambitions . Although sh e employs a range o f manip ulative tactic s t o brea k u p bot h couples , sh e succeed s onl y i n endin g Robert's engagemen t t o Hester. Her nearly successful attempt s to destro y Dave's marriag e ar e thwarte d b y th e intelligent , articulat e an d psycho logically savv y Christina , whos e insigh t int o Mrs . Phelps's shortcoming s provides the play's pointed criticis m o f overly affectionate mothers . Afte r a disastrou s first evening , Christin a desperatel y urge s Dav e t o cu t thei r visit shor t an d leave , afrai d tha t i f the y linge r sh e wil l los e hi m t o hi s mother. A t th e play' s clima x sh e confronts Mrs . Phelps: "Yo u belon g t o a typ e that' s ver y commo n i n thes e days , Mrs . Phelps— a typ e o f self centered, self-pitying , so n devourin g tigress. " Sh e ignore s th e family' s protests an d continues , "Yo u an d you r kin d bea t an y cannibals I'v e eve r heard of ! An d wha t make s yo u doubl y deadl y an d dangerou s i s tha t people admir e yo u an d you r kind . The y actuall y admir e you ! Yo u pro fessional mothers! " Christina's mos t pointe d criticis m o f professional mother s i s that the y

The Silver Cord 11

9

use their son s to fulfil l thei r romanti c desires . She vows that sh e will love her ow n bab y withi n bounds : "unpossessively—abov e all , unromanti cally." An d sh e shock s th e famil y b y describin g ho w fa r ou t o f bound s the lov e o f professiona l mother s ma y g o a s she explain s t o Dav e tha t hi s mother wante d t o separat e the m "becaus e sh e couldn't bea r th e though t of ou r lovin g on e anothe r a s we do . . . . And that' s becaus e down, dow n in th e depth s o f her , grow n ma n tha t yo u are , sh e stil l want s t o suckl e you a t he r breast! " A s th e pla y close s Dav e realize s tha t h e mus t brea k completely wit h hi s mothe r t o find happines s wit h hi s wife. A s he leave s he admit s tha t h e an d hi s brothe r ha d bee n trappe d i n thei r mother' s home, an d h e walk s ou t th e doo r a s Mrs . Phelp s implore s him , "Fo r God's sake , Dave, don't g o with her ! Not wit h tha t awfu l woman , Dave ! That wicke d woman ! Fo r God' s sak e don' t leav e m e for her , Dave! " H e escapes strangulatio n b y the silve r cor d an d presumabl y finds fulfillmen t in companionat e marriag e wit h a moder n woman . Hi s brothe r i s not s o lucky, an d a s th e curtai n fall s Robert , cradle d i n hi s mother' s arms , i s engulfed forever. 2 Motherhood, an d th e problem s inheren t i n th e overabundan t affec tion mother s carr y fo r thei r children , ha d becom e a pressin g issu e eve n before th e 1920s . In he r diary , Clar a Savage' s first mentio n o f he r futur e husband, Howar d Littledale , wh o worke d wit h he r a t th e New York Evening Post, record s tha t h e escorte d he r t o a train . O n th e wa y h e confided t o he r tha t h e ha d begu n writin g plays . "On e wa s o n 'Mother hood' bu t h e coul d tel l m e n o mor e fo r fea r o f shockin g me!!! " Savage , who live d wit h he r mothe r i n a n apartmen t i n Ne w Yor k a t th e time , probably woul d hav e understoo d th e potentia l fo r conflic t i n th e rela tionship. Her late r writings , as we shall see, warned agains t the potentia l dangers o f th e "mothe r instinct." 3 The proble m tha t middle-clas s American s discovere d i n motherhoo d in th e earl y decade s o f th e twentiet h centur y wen t han d i n han d wit h new view s o n ho w t o rais e children . Sidne y Howar d contraste d th e pathological, prudish , infantilizin g mothe r represente d b y Mrs . Phelp s with mothers wh o want thei r childre n t o b e me n an d wome n an d tak e car e o f them selves; mother s wh o ar e people , too , an d don' t hav e t o b e afrai d o f lonelines s after they'v e outlive d thei r motherhood ; mother s wh o ca n loo k o n thei r childre n as peopl e an d enjo y the m a s peopl e an d no t b e foreve r holdin g o n t o the m an d pawing the m an d fussin g abou t thei r healt h an d singin g them lullabie s an d tuck ing them u p a s though the y wer e everlastin g babies. 4

120 The

Silver Cord

Although Howar d referre d t o thes e a s normal mothers , they seemed rar e enough i n the cultural reflections o n motherhood o f the period. And even though th e daughter-in-law' s speec h t o Mrs . Phelp s refer s t o motherin g of adul t children , th e sam e problem s o f overl y affectionat e attentio n appeared a s problem s i n th e literatur e o n th e car e o f infant s an d youn g children. In the year followin g th e openin g o f the play, a popular guid e to chil d care b y psychologist an d advertisin g executiv e John B . Watson (wit h th e assistance o f hi s wif e Rosali e Rayne r Watson ) wen t eve n furthe r i n at tacking th e proble m mothe r b y questionin g th e valu e o f individua l homes fo r children . "Ther e ar e undoubtedl y mor e scientifi c way s o f bringing u p children," Watson asserted , "whic h will probably mean finer and happie r children. " But if he questioned whethe r a child should kno w its parents, it was mainly its acquaintance wit h the mother tha t presente d the problem . Throughou t thei r work , th e Watson s refe r t o th e chil d a s "him," whil e th e onl y paren t t o appea r i n th e wor k (excep t fo r th e father's dail y "hal f hour" ) wa s the mother. Th e boo k warne d wome n t o "remember whe n yo u ar e tempte d t o pe t you r chil d tha t mothe r lov e i s a dangerou s instrument. " Rathe r tha n th e coddlin g an d affectio n tha t would surel y caus e seriou s damage , th e wor k urge d wome n t o leav e children wit h nurses , o r i f thi s wa s impractical , leav e the m i n th e back yard fo r mos t o f th e day . "Neve r hu g an d kis s them , neve r le t the m si t on you r lap. " B y the 1920s , muc h o f wha t th e Watson s offere d seeme d like commo n sense . Their boo k wen t throug h severa l editions , an d Joh n Watson activel y spread hi s views in popular magazin e article s during th e last half o f th e 1920s . Popular autho r Floy d Dell , who criticize d Watso n on man y points , nevertheless foun d "man y fine thing s i n this book." 5 Young mother s i n th e 1920 s ofte n share d thei r culture' s suspicio n o f motherhood. Th e relation s tha t wome n ha d wit h thei r ow n mother s shaped thei r assimilatio n o f th e cultura l norms . Althoug h man y wome n recalled war m relation s wit h thei r mothers , their recollection s als o ofte n included powerfu l conflict s wit h parents , especiall y mothers . Middle class wome n wante d t o rais e thei r childre n differentl y fro m th e way s they ha d bee n raised , t o provid e moder n version s o f nurture , an d the y looked t o th e expertis e availabl e i n book s an d periodical s t o giv e the m the wisdo m tha t thei r ow n mother s lacked . Yet , a s i n th e cas e o f ro mance an d marriage , the feelings tha t wome n bor e toward thei r childre n often faile d t o fit th e culture' s prescriptions . Althoug h the y ma y hav e worried abou t th e implication s o f thei r actions , wome n stil l pai d clos e

The Silver Cord 12

1

and lovin g attentio n t o thei r children . I f they assimilate d th e notio n tha t they mus t shap e independen t youn g me n an d wome n a t a n earl y age , they nevertheles s resiste d advic e tha t contradicte d thei r inclination s to ward affectionat e nurture . Mother as Villain Middle-class American s i n th e nineteent h centur y see m neve r t o hav e dreamed tha t a mother' s lov e migh t becom e a sourc e o f ill . Althoug h Victorian American s believe d al l emotions required self-restraint , mothe r love appeare d i n th e advic e literatur e o f th e er a a s th e pures t emotio n and th e on e mos t likel y t o bles s al l wh o experience d it . A mother's lov e could kee p he r so n o n th e straigh t an d narro w eve n thoug h temptation s surrounded hi m a s h e gre w olde r an d entere d th e world. 6 A lat e Victo rian novella , Laddie, offer s a full y develope d idea l o f mothe r love . I t i s the stor y o f a youn g physicia n whos e mothe r visit s hi m afte r year s o f separation. Whe n sh e arrive s i n hi s office s h e initiall y feel s sham e a t he r shabby appearance . Realizin g this , th e ol d woma n leaves . He r so n re pents almos t immediatel y an d begin s a searc h fo r he r throug h th e city . Only eightee n month s late r doe s h e find her, i n a hospital takin g he r las t breaths. Th e mothe r ha s forgotte n th e son' s shame , an d a s h e come s t o her sid e again , sh e blesse s hi m an d hi s fiance. A mother' s lov e i s inde structible, the stor y tells us, even when i t is rejected b y its most cherishe d object. An d i n th e hear t o f th e love d one , th e mother' s lov e wil l alway s win ou t ove r mor e worldl y sentiments. 7 The nineteenth-centur y visio n o f mothe r lov e survive d int o th e earl y decades o f th e twentiet h century . Winfiel d Scot t Hall , a professo r o f medicine i n th e 1920s , stil l maintaine d tha t th e youn g chil d wil l becom e impressed wit h th e "sacrednes s o f lif e an d o f motherhood , an d wil l b e held t o th e mothe r b y a bon d o f confidenc e an d love. " Best-sellin g au thor Gen e Stratton-Porte r endorse d motherhoo d throug h a characte r who tell s he r neighbo r tha t he r "highes t aspiratio n i s t o b e a clean , thrifty housekeeper , a bountifu l cook , a faithfu l wife , a sympatheti c mother." 8 We catc h a glimpse o f mothe r lov e i n th e diar y o f Edn a Clair e Ferris , whose first so n wa s bor n i n 190 5 shortl y afte r th e deat h o f he r husban d in a trai n accident . Althoug h Ferri s ha d t o wor k t o suppor t herself , sh e nevertheless staye d clos e to hom e an d spen t tim e with he r so n every day . It wa s mor e tha n a yea r afte r William' s birt h befor e sh e lef t hi m alon e

122 The

Silver Cord

for a n entir e day . I n he r diar y Ferri s referre d t o he r so n a s "Lover " an d "Lover Boy, " an d sh e recorde d ever y ne w developmen t i n he r youn g son's life . Fo r instance , sh e recorde d hi s birthday s an d ever y gif t tha t h e received. Ferri s note d th e beginnin g o f William' s forma l schoolin g i n 1910. "Dea r littl e boy , i t make s mothe r fee l ba d t o hav e hi m strik e ou t for himself." 9 Middle-class wome n wh o cam e o f ag e i n th e generatio n followin g Ferris conceive d o f motherhoo d fa r differentl y tha n Ferri s did . Th e ne w opportunities availabl e to young women bor n afte r 188 0 inspired writer s around 190 0 wit h vision s o f mother/daughte r conflict s a s daughter s lef t their mother s (an d motherhood ) fo r colleg e and career . There appear s t o have bee n relativel y littl e conflic t betwee n th e firs t generatio n o f colleg e and professiona l wome n an d thei r mothers . B y 1900 , however , th e pee r culture o f th e hig h schoo l ha d becom e widesprea d amon g middle-clas s youth, an d th e generatio n tha t gre w u p afte r 190 0 experience d compet ing pull s fro m th e pee r cultur e an d th e home . Edn a Ferri s worrie d tha t her son , William , wa s "restles s an d wil d t o d o al l sort s o f impossibl e things." O n hi s sixteent h birthda y sh e wondere d i f sh e ha d bee n "to o proud o f him " i n the past an d frette d tha t sh e could no t reconcil e hersel f to hi s smoking cigarettes . The conflic t tha t man y teen-ager s o f the 1910 s experienced wit h thei r parent s le d the m t o accep t th e ne w characteriza tion o f motherhoo d a s stifling , underminin g initiativ e an d self-reliance. 10 Social scientist s an d popula r writer s o f th e 1920 s conceive d o f moth erhood, lik e sex , a s a biologica l fact . But , althoug h th e se x driv e seeme d more an d mor e lik e a valuabl e asse t i n huma n life , a broa d rang e o f writers agree d tha t ther e wa s "somethin g dangerou s abou t th e materna l instinct." Watson , wh o ha d n o roo m fo r instinct s i n hi s syste m o f psy chology, believe d tha t th e sexua l stimulatio n tha t wome n receive d fro m nursing mad e th e chil d " a kin d o f attenuate d surrogat e fo r th e husband . 'Mother love ' i s basicall y a positiv e sex reactio n whic h rarel y become s overt." Th e natura l satisfactio n tha t wome n foun d i n carin g fo r thei r children coul d tur n int o a dangerous habit , with mothers providing mor e care than necessar y an d s o making their children more and more depend ent o n them. 11 " A wonderfull y swee t feelin g t o hav e you r childre n turn ing t o yo u fo r wisdo m an d guidanc e an d protection, " reflecte d a house wife i n 1930 s Lon g Island . "Swee t fo r th e mothe r bu t deadl y fo r th e children a s they struggle to grow u p and becom e individuals. The mothe r in The Silver Cord alway s haunt s me—wha t martyre d selfishness!" 12

The Silver Cord 12

3

Journalist Samue l Schmalhause n believe d tha t th e typica l mothe r treated he r chil d a s " a sor t o f wonderfu l scapegoa t fo r he r frustrate d human nature. " Accordin g t o Schmalhausen , Freud' s Oedipu s comple x missed th e mos t importan t patholog y o f famil y life—i t wa s th e mothe r who ha d th e primar y responsibilit y fo r shaping , an d misshaping , th e child. "Ho w ca n th e chil d attai n t o sel f dependence, " he asked, "whe n a fond (i.e. , foolish , selfish , blind , hysterical , unimaginative , unfulfilled , infantile!) paren t i s alway s o n th e scen e t o preven t i t fro m developin g a self t o b e dependen t upon? " I n explorin g th e famil y problem s tha t "fil l our court s an d hospitals, " refor m schoo l superintenden t Miria m Va n Waters include d "mother s whos e desir e i s not t o nouris h lif e an d feelin g in children , bu t t o absor b it. " Chil d psychologis t Winnifre d Richmon d warned parent s agains t to o man y restriction s o n thei r adolescen t daugh ters, bu t whe n sh e turne d t o th e proble m o f overindulgenc e an d rulin g the gir l b y appeal s t o he r lov e an d sympathy , sh e addresse d onl y moth ers. Anothe r chil d psychologist , Ad a Har t Arlitt , als o pointe d t o th e problem o f mother s wh o "brib e th e chil d t o continu e t o lov e her 'bes t i n the world. ' " 13 The wome n wh o raise d childre n i n th e earl y decade s o f th e centur y bore th e brun t o f th e ideologica l repudiatio n o f Victoria n sexua l moral ity. Joh n Watso n portraye d thes e wome n a s harpie s o f sexua l prudery , "who hav e go t nothin g ou t o f sex—wh o implan t th e vie w tha t ther e i s nothing i n sex. " Anothe r write r believe d tha t th e mother s o f th e 1920 s had lacke d adequat e sexua l thrill s in thei r yout h "s o tha t the y must no w try t o eve n u p th e coun t b y mean s o f vicariou s thrills. " A stud y o f th e sex live s o f colleg e wome n foun d tha t a fe w girl s remaine d inhibite d i n spite o f th e liberatin g effect s o f colleg e life . Th e writer s referre d t o on e girl whos e mothe r dre w "th e silve r cor d tightl y aroun d he r neck " b y scolding her daughte r eve n for kissin g the girl's fiance. A physician, writ ing a guid e t o th e ne w morality , spen t muc h o f hi s introductio n lament ing th e surviva l o f narrow-mindednes s tha t handicappe d man y youn g women i n finding happiness . "T o m e one o f th e saddes t thing s abou t th e somewhat odd , old-maidish , cold , an d reserve d typ e o f gir l i s that com monly sh e i s brough t u p b y a psychopathic , reserved , over-religious , o r sexually anaestheti c mother. " H e wen t o n t o lamen t th e "miser y thes e mothers no w han d o n t o thei r daughter s throug h thei r evi l an d wrong headed an d viciou s training! " Wilhel m Stekel , wh o ha d mad e frigidit y one of the most widel y discusse d psychi c disorder s o f the 1920s , claimed

124 The

Silver Cord

that frigi d wome n "are not fit to be mothers" .Repressin g thei r ow n sexual impulses , the y "als o struggl e agains t ever y sexua l expressio n o f their children." 14 Because sexua l pleasur e ha d becom e b y the 1920 s a fundamenta l ele ment o f marrie d love , blightin g th e fre e pla y o f sexua l desir e harme d marriage. Bu t th e 1920 s abounde d i n image s o f mother s interferin g di rectly i n the live s and marriage s o f adul t children . Good Housekeeping's Clara Savag e Littledal e wrot e o f mother s wh o gav e their daughter s littl e preparation fo r marrie d lif e an d the n encourage d continue d dependenc e on the m eve n afte r marriage . "Sh e ma y believ e tha t mother-lov e i s he r guiding principle . Bu t actually , dee p i n he r lov e fo r he r daughter , i s a n unsuspected elemen t o f selfishness . Sh e want s t o kee p he r daughte r a baby, her baby. " Doroth y Di x regrette d mother s wh o taugh t daughter s "by precep t an d exampl e t o evad e ever y dut y o f wifehoo d an d mother hood." Th e relatio n o f mother s t o thei r sons , a s i n th e Howar d play , could becom e eve n mor e infantilizin g an d deadl y t o th e growt h o f inde pendence an d individuality . A man wit h a fixed ideal o f a wife simila r t o his mothe r woul d almos t neve r b e happy wit h hi s fles h an d bloo d bride . One marriag e guid e fo r wome n offere d a whole chapte r o n dealin g wit h husbands wh o wer e attache d t o thei r mothers . G . V . Hamilton' s stud y of marrie d me n an d wome n foun d tha t visit s fro m th e mothe r o f a spouse inevitably create d problem s fo r th e marriage. Hamilton suspecte d the sourc e o f thi s interferenc e wa s i n th e unsatisfactor y se x live s o f th e older women . H e wishe d h e coul d mak e mother s realiz e "ho w stupi d and selfis h i t is to defe r th e psychological weanin g o f their offsprin g unti l it i s automatically effecte d b y deat h o r extrem e ol d age." 15 The mothe r wh o undermine d th e independenc e o f adul t childre n be came a stock figure i n the fiction o f the period. When on e o f the wealth y young me n i n a n Elino r Gly n nove l propose s t o th e heroine , Ava , sh e suggests hi s mothe r migh t interfere . "Why , m y mothe r wil l jus t ea t yo u up," th e wealth y suito r replies . "We'v e neve r bee n parted—Sh e an d I — and she' s alway s sai d tha t she'l l welcom e th e gir l I marry , i f sh e reall y loves me , an d wouldn' t com e betwee n us—an d yo u wouldn't , Ava , I' m sure. I thin k a ma n i s n o ma n unles s hi s mothe r take s th e first place. " Glyn, o f course , leave s us with th e implicatio n tha t an y man wh o allow s his mother t o interfer e wit h hi s adult lif e i s much les s than a man shoul d be. Fo r reader s i n th e Freud-savv y 1920s , th e oedipa l subtex t appeare d obvious an d unanswerable . On e colleg e woma n wh o sa w The Silver

The Silver Cord 12

5

Cord wondere d ho w man y i n th e audienc e understoo d th e scen e a t th e end o f th e pla y whe n th e so n wh o coul d no t bea r t o leav e hi s mothe r sank hi s hea d ont o he r breas t an d agree d t o g o awa y wit h her . Probabl y most o f the m did. 16 The imag e o f stiflin g mother s tha t becam e s o commo n i n th e earl y decades o f th e centur y shape d th e way s tha t youn g me n an d wome n understood thei r ow n experiences . I n reflectin g o n he r lov e affai r wit h author Joh n Marquand , th e Boston-bre d actres s Hele n How e note d tha t she an d John , an d John' s wif e Christina , "wer e extremel y clos e t o ou r mothers. A psychiatris t woul d hav e diagnose d tha t 'th e mothe r bond ' was unusuall y close. " Althoug h Howe , writin g decade s afte r he r rela tionship wit h Marquan d ha d ended , identifie d n o problem s resultin g from thes e clos e mothe r bonds , he r abilit y t o plac e th e mother-chil d relationship int o a therapeutic framewor k reveal s a common conceptio n of ho w thes e relationship s worked . Jan e Sherman , o n tou r i n th e Fa r East, wrot e hom e regularl y t o he r mothe r tellin g he r "i f yo u onl y kne w how muc h I neede d you. " Ye t sh e note d tha t anothe r o f th e dancers , whose mothe r cam e alon g fo r par t o f th e trip , wen t int o hysteric s ove r conflicts wit h the mother. Photographer Margare t Bourke-Whit e recalle d that sh e marrie d Everet t Chapma n i n 192 3 "wit h th e su n i n m y eyes, " but sh e face d " a silver-cor d entanglement " befor e thei r honeymoo n ended. "Yo u go t hi m awa y fro m me, " he r ne w mother-in-la w tol d her . "I congratulat e you . I never wan t t o se e yo u again. " Th e oppositio n o f her husband' s mothe r prove d ruinou s fo r th e coupl e wh o divorce d jus t two year s later. 17 Although w e know a t least a little about th e mother-daughter relatio n of virtuall y ever y woma n whos e persona l paper s for m th e basi s fo r thi s study, i t i s impossible t o offe r a genera l characterizatio n o f th e relation s between thes e modern , middle-clas s wome n an d thei r mothers . Expres sions o f affectio n ar e quit e common . Althoug h persisten t conflic t rarel y appears i n thes e documents , sporadi c conflict s ofte n appear . Lik e an y long-term relationship , mother-daughte r relation s i n ou r grou p ha d lay ers of experience s an d reaction s tha t calle d ou t a wide range o f emotion s and judgments . Wit h th e widesprea d questionin g o f th e Victoria n idea l of mothe r lov e curren t b y th e 1920s , daughter s tende d t o understan d conflicts wit h thei r mother s a s par t o f a large r conflic t o f generations — that moder n childre n ha d t o thro w of f th e bondag e o f inhibitio n an d repression an d embrac e honest y an d liberation . Eve n whe n wome n

126 The

Silver Cord

wrote lovin g letter s t o thei r mother s o r recalle d the m wit h affection , virtually al l o f the m occasionall y acte d i n way s tha t contradicte d thei r expressions o f affection . Autobiographies, suc h a s thos e b y Sall y Carrigha r an d Oliv e Ewin g Clapper, contai n interpretation s o f mother-daughte r conflic t fro m th e perspective o f decades . Fe w account s contai n sharpe r division s betwee n mother an d chil d tha n Sall y Carrighar's , whos e mothe r ha d suffere d s o severely in delivery that sh e could hardl y bea r the presence o f her daugh ter. Eve n a t six , Sall y kne w tha t i f sh e move d to o clos e o r accidentall y touched he r mothe r sh e would shudder , "a s i f sh e ha d bee n touche d b y a snak e o r lizard. " I f the y brushe d i n th e corridor , he r mothe r woul d "involuntarily shiver. " Sall y drew much closer to her father. He r mother , meanwhile, "manage d everything , money , th e household, th e committe e work a t he r church , s o well. " Year s later , th e adul t Sall y discusse d he r mother wit h a psychiatris t wh o gav e th e opinio n tha t he r mothe r mus t have bee n psychotic. 18 Olive Ewin g Clappe r als o provide d a retrospectiv e diagnosi s o f he r mother, althoug h on e base d o n he r mother' s ignoranc e o f psycholog y and th e nee d fo r se x education . Th e mothe r o f fou r daughters , Jenni e Ewing "pounde d int o ou r ears , a s sh e combe d ou r hair " he r hope s fo r their professiona l careers . Sh e nevertheles s als o insiste d tha t he r daugh ters maste r domesti c skills , even keepin g Oliv e ou t o f hig h schoo l fo r si x months s o sh e coul d lear n t o coo k an d sew . Jenni e Ewin g als o treate d each daughte r differently , creatin g th e basi s for late r "complexes " in her daughter's opinion . Take n a s a whole, Olive' s descriptio n o f he r mothe r was warml y affectionate . Bu t when Oliv e bega n t o dat e Ra y Clappe r i n high school , Olive found hersel f i n conflict wit h her parents who worrie d that sh e an d Ra y wer e becomin g to o intimat e to o quickly . Whe n the y finally decide d t o sen d Oliv e to Indian a t o le t the romanc e coo l off , Ra y and Oliv e eloped . Althoug h thi s offer s a ver y dramati c instanc e o f th e competing attraction s o f famil y an d romance , i t als o show s tha t affec tionate familie s coul d harbo r stron g conflict s ove r th e value s o f th e pee r culture.19 Accounts produce d durin g th e yout h an d adulthoo d o f wome n i n th e 1920s offe r portrait s o f attractio n an d conflic t mor e comple x tha n th e retrospective diagnoses . Bet h Twigga r note d he r mother' s birthda y i n 1930 and added , " I love her tremendously. An d I'm no t half nic e enoug h to her. " A s w e hav e alread y seen , Twigga r embrace d th e yout h cultur e and heterosexua l experimentatio n o f th e 1920 s wit h th e self-consciou s

The Silver Cord 12

7

recognition tha t yout h mus t cas t of f al l o f th e ol d standards . In a n ar gument a few years earlier, Twiggar ha d calle d her mother "a n ol d fool. " She recorde d he r regre t an d remors e i n he r diar y bu t als o he r commit ment t o ne w values . " I want t o d o thing s an d b e things, she can't under stand. I want t o b e modern an d whicke d [sic] an d sophisticated , an d sh e thinks i t i s eithe r nature l [sic] preverseness [sic] or th e faul t o f m y up bringing." 20 Although Bet h Twigga r ma y hav e expresse d th e conflic t ove r ne w standards mor e directl y tha n mos t diarists , th e conflict s appea r i n a va riety o f papers . Glady s Hasty , fo r instance , expresse d onl y affectio n fo r her famil y i n he r publishe d journal , bu t sh e als o recognize d ho w muc h lighter an d happie r he r parents ' live s seeme d afte r he r grandfather , wh o had live d wit h th e family , died . An n Mari e Lo w fel t close r t o he r fathe r and brothe r tha n t o he r mothe r an d sister . Althoug h committe d t o he r rural life , sh e als o wante d recognitio n a s someon e capabl e o f takin g o n the famil y property . Jan e Sherma n ha d war m relation s wit h bot h o f he r parents, an d he r mothe r i n particula r seem s to hav e supporte d he r artis tic ambitions . As she departed fo r th e Orient , sh e wrote o f feelin g "crue l and selfish " a t leavin g he r family . In th e Fa r East , however , sh e foun d herself confrontin g experience s o n her own tha t sh e had t o deal with an d then explai n t o he r parent s a s best she could. Bot h college and he r socia l work seeme d t o distanc e Marth a Lavel l fro m he r mother . A t time s the y could enjo y ope n discussion s o n controversia l topic s suc h a s se x an d religion, bu t tension seem s to have replaced warme r feeling s b y Martha' s early adul t years . Elizabet h Yates' s diar y recount s he r struggl e t o clai m self an d independenc e i n spit e o f he r parents ' insistenc e o n th e demand s of clas s and family. 21 Some youn g wome n embrace d th e moder n world . Som e confronte d it. Some , apparently , trie d t o ignor e it . Ann e Morro w expresse d onl y affection an d admiratio n fo r he r mother. Although sh e expressed a desire to atten d Vassa r Colleg e instea d o f he r mother' s alm a mater , Smit h Col lege, thi s attemp t t o strik e ou t o n he r ow n disappear s i n late r entrie s without comment . Ye t Morrow becam e thoroughl y modern , datin g dur ing he r colleg e years , bobbin g he r hair , wearin g shor t skirts . He r mar riage to Charle s Lindberg h wa s supporte d b y her family , ye t Lindbergh' s background wa s strikingl y differen t fro m Morrow's . Lindberg h rea d lit tle an d ha d littl e patienc e fo r th e literar y interest s o f Ann e Morro w an d her mother . Afte r th e coupl e married , the y live d a lif e quit e differen t from th e comfortabl e worl d o f la w an d bankin g tha t th e Morrow s in -

128 The

Silver Cord

habited. Durin g he r first year o f marriage Ann e Morrow Lindberg h trav eled almos t constantl y wit h he r husban d a s he surveyed ai r travel routes, worked t o advanc e aviation , an d di d busines s fo r hi s airlin e company. 22 Anne Morrow' s rebellion , i f i t ca n b e calle d that , wa s mute d an d prob ably unconscious . lone Robinso n lef t hom e a t ag e sixtee n t o stud y ar t a t th e Pennsylva nia Academ y o f Ar t i n Philadelphia . O n th e trai n fro m Lo s Angele s sh e discovered a letter from he r mother "s o full o f love and kindness, it made me fee l tha t t o b e lik e yo u i s m y rea l goal. " Sh e hope d t o b e successfu l "so tha t w e ma y b e togethe r soo n again. " O n he r tri p sh e frequentl y wrote lovin g letter s t o he r mothe r an d tol d he r everythin g abou t he r lif e in the East. Yet in spite of a n unbroke n strea m o f affectionate correspon dence, Robinson woul d onl y retur n hom e tw o year s later. Sh e studied i n New York , France , an d Mexico . He r newl y acquire d politic s becam e a source o f irritatio n whe n sh e hun g a hamme r an d sickl e i n he r mother' s apartment durin g he r on e brie f visi t home . He r engagement , t o a Com munist activist , als o upset he r relations with he r mother. Robinson's first marriage ende d i n divorc e an d he r livin g situatio n i n Ne w Yor k contin ued o n th e tenuou s edge s o f th e ar t worl d i n whic h sh e longe d t o suc ceed. Whe n presente d wit h a marriag e proposa l fro m a melanchol y bu t wealthy youn g man , he r mothe r urge d he r t o accep t th e proposal . In spite o f th e distanc e an d conflic t o f th e relationship , Robinso n fel t tha t her connectio n t o he r mothe r wa s th e primar y on e i n he r lif e an d s o fel t completely a t a loss when he r mothe r die d i n an aut o acciden t soo n afte r Robinson's secon d marriage. 23 If daughters coul d maintai n affectionat e feeling s towar d thei r mother s even i n th e mids t o f rebellio n agains t som e o f wha t th e mother s stoo d for, feelin g affectio n fo r mothers-in-la w coul d b e difficul t eve n i n th e best circumstances . Marjori e Kinna n wrot e t o he r fiance abou t th e pros pect o f livin g wit h hi s parents : "i t isn' t tha t w e wan t t o b e selfish , o r ungrateful, o r don' t car e fo r th e olde r generation . Bu t you kno w a s wel l as I do what a mess that situatio n ALWAY S makes." Gladys Bell Penrod lived in her mother-in-law' s hous e for th e first two years of her marriage . She frequentl y recounte d feeling s o f frustratio n an d irritatio n towar d Sarah Penrod . Severa l month s afte r movin g i n wit h he r sh e wrote , "Three time s I resolve d t o kee p m y tho't s o n agreeabl e subject s an d a s often I soon foun d mysel f o n th e ol d them e mother-in-law." 24

The Silver Cord 12

9

Modern Child Rearing Forming th e new generatio n stil l rested i n the hands o f mothers, and thi s at a tim e whe n motherhoo d seeme d fundamentall y flawed . Expert s an d advice literature , claimin g th e authorit y o f science , attempte d t o men d the care of children with schedules , psychology, and expande d schooling , taking som e role s fro m th e mothe r an d attemptin g t o tak e man y deci sions ou t o f th e hand s o f parents . Psychologist s an d reformer s alik e brought motherhoo d unde r new , an d sometime s unfavorable , scrutiny . Feminists, strivin g t o broade n th e spher e o f opportunit y availabl e t o women, ofte n denigrate d motherhoo d i n favo r o f a caree r o r a lif e i n reform work. 25 Th e ne w stres s o n efficienc y i n housekeeping , includin g regulating th e baby' s feedin g time , probabl y receive d read y acceptanc e from middle-clas s wome n wh o coul d expec t t o hav e fewer , i f any , ser vants a s th e twentiet h centur y continued . Beginnin g i n th e mid-1890s , child advic e literatur e bega n t o urg e regimentation , schedule , an d tim e discipline upo n America n mothers . Writers suc h a s Luther Holt , reactin g to th e success o f America n industr y an d technolog y (an d encourage d b y producers o f infan t mil k formulas) , advise d mother s t o se t fixed time s for feeding , sleeping , an d elimination. 26 B y th e earl y twentiet h century , industrial tim e an d motio n studie s woul d ente r int o housekeepin g liter ature a s devices for makin g wive s an d mother s mor e efficient. 27 The psycholog y o f Willia m Jame s als o shape d th e ne w child-rearin g literature. James ha d presente d habi t a s th e "enormou s fly-whee l o f so ciety," keepin g eac h o f u s a t ou r dut y i n spit e o f pai n o r othe r disincen tives. Habi t woul d becom e a fundamenta l explanatio n o f huma n char acter in the "functional " phas e of American psycholog y an d a basic term in th e behavioris t psycholog y o f Joh n Watso n tha t emerge d b y 1920 . Mrs. Ma x West , whos e pamphle t fo r th e Children' s Burea u becam e on e of th e bes t seller s o f child-rearin g advic e literatur e i n th e earl y decade s of th e century , describe d educatio n o f th e infan t usin g th e sam e meta phor tha t Jame s did , o f deepenin g pathway s i n th e brain . Lik e James , the new child-rearing literatur e insiste d tha t parents no t deviat e from th e scheduled reinforcemen t o f th e ne w habit . Hol t repeatedl y warne d tha t "Bad habit s [whethe r eatin g to o frequentl y o r masturbating ] ar e readil y acquired bu t difficul t t o break. " A 193 1 manua l include d chapter s out lining ho w goo d habit s coul d b e forme d fo r sleeping , eating , an d elimi nating. Th e habi t o f "willin g obedience " woul d becom e th e foundatio n on whic h th e adul t coul d trai n th e chil d i n initiativ e an d independence .

130 The

Silver Cord

If goo d characte r remaine d th e goal o f child-rearing advice , that charac ter, lik e the Jamesian self , would b e built upon the basis of good habits. 28 The emotiona l lif e o f childre n als o receive d attentio n fro m th e new child-rearing experts . Nervousness , recognize d a s a n afflictio n tha t struck mainl y th e middle class , als o threatene d infant s an d children according t o Hol t an d thos e wh o followe d him . Like th e rest-cure thera pists o f th e late nineteent h century , Hol t urge d mother s t o kee p babie s in quie t an d peaceful surroundings . "Infant s wh o are naturally nervou s should b e lef t muc h alone, " h e warned , "shoul d se e bu t fe w people , should b e playe d wit h ver y little , an d shoul d neve r b e quiete d wit h soothing sirrup s o r th e 'pacifier. ' " Man y o f th e writer s wh o followe d Holt reproduce d hi s proscription o f play . Althoug h som e authors , suc h as Mrs . Max West , stresse d th e effec t o n th e child' s nerves , Wes t an d others als o worrie d tha t showerin g childre n wit h kisse s and other atten tion woul d "mak e hi m mor e dependen t upo n thes e attentions. " Ad a Hart Arlitt , writin g five year s afte r Watson , praise d th e "present-da y method o f leavin g th e bab y i n th e cri b withou t an y unnecessar y han dling." Child-rearin g expert s reflecte d th e growing cultura l suspicio n of motherhood an d embodied thi s in warnings agains t "over-coddling " and in the goal o f early individuatio n fo r children. 29 Modern, scientifi c chil d rearin g looke d forwar d t o a ne w generatio n of full y independen t adults . Althoug h i t i s unlikel y tha t man y wome n subscribed t o Watson's idea l tha t childre n b y age three "shoul d begi n to dress an d ac t lik e youthfu l me n an d women, " authoritie s agree d tha t parents shoul d giv e thei r childre n th e example s an d experience s tha t would hel p the m gro w i n "body , intelligence , personalit y an d social relationships." If parents, especially mothers, could work agains t their selfish desire s to overprotec t children , the n the y migh t giv e them th e ability to stan d o n their ow n feet an d make thei r ow n way in the world. 30 Modern mother s wante d th e best for their children , including moder n child rearing . Mildre d Brewste r recalle d tha t sh e always treate d he r son "as i f he were m y age and could understan d everything. " Oliv e Clappe r at leas t claime d familiarit y wit h chil d advic e literature. 31 Ann e Morro w Lindbergh rea d a number o f current book s o n child rearin g just after her first child , Charle s Jr. , was born . "The y al l see m frightfull y hippe d o n the overfondle d chil d an d its hard life, " sh e wrote. Lindberg h too k th e warnings o f expert s t o heart , tryin g no t to coddl e th e baby . "H e i s allowed t o ge t bump s o n hi s hea d an d le t cr y whe n h e ha s a temper. " Perhaps takin g a lea f fro m Watson' s advice , sh e lef t Charle s Jr . wit h

The Silver Cord 13

1

family member s whe n sh e an d Charle s Sr . scoute d a rout e t o th e Orien t via th e Arctic . "Don' t le t Bett y giv e hi m to o man y toy s a t once, " sh e wrote i n he r instructions , "jus t on e o r two , an d chang e the m abou t an d don't le t peopl e fus s ove r hi m o r pa y attentio n t o hi s littl e fall s o r mis takes, will you?" 32 Caroline Gordo n als o face d th e necessit y o f leavin g he r baby , Nancy , with he r mothe r durin g he r husband' s yea r i n Franc e a s a Guggenhei m fellow an d late r durin g he r ow n Guggenhei m fellowshi p year . Fo r Gor don, however , separatio n fro m Nanc y brough t he r t o recogniz e he r ow n confusion ove r th e plac e o f he r daughte r i n he r life . Whe n he r mothe r came t o tak e th e baby , grandmothe r an d infan t too k t o on e anothe r quickly. " I neve r sa w anybod y a s mad ove r a child," Gordo n wrot e t o a friend. "Sh e could hardl y pu t he r dow n a moment. Al l our modern idea s of no t handlin g the m wer e swep t aside. " Later , however , whe n Gordo n had returne d fro m he r year i n France, she determined t o take her daugh ter back . "Mothe r is—indescribable . Sh e is medieval in spirit." Althoug h she di d no t specif y th e problem s sh e found , Carolin e Gordo n obviousl y believed tha t Nancy' s upbringin g suffere d withou t th e benefi t o f moder n expertise. Gordon's ow n mothe r ha d give n her u p to her mother t o raise, so Gordo n ha d t o fac e persona l conflict s ove r he r ow n childhoo d i n he r relations wit h he r mothe r an d daughter . Whe n sh e first lef t Nanc y wit h her mother , sh e wrot e tha t i t wa s "doin g al l sort s o f thing s t o me , though. I'v e fel t paralyze d fo r weeks." 33 Like Carolin e Gordon , man y wome n b y th e 1920 s ha d t o fac e con flicts betwee n thei r ow n upbringin g an d thei r idea s fo r rearin g their chil dren. The y sough t t o cas t of f ol d method s o f raisin g thei r children , t o shape character s tha t coul d uphol d socia l convention s bu t als o becom e independent individuals . Doroth y Dushki n wrot e o f he r "horro r o f having [her ] child' s initiativ e & mentalit y oppresse d int o an y apprehen sive or watchfu l regar d fo r th e averag e socia l convention waitin g to tak e his o r he r cu e from wha t th e grou p does." 34 To th e exten t tha t middle-clas s wome n accepte d th e authorit y o f th e child-rearing literature , the y face d a seriou s contradiction . Child-rearin g literature i n the early decades o f the century use d the authority o f science to focu s th e attentio n o f mother s o n th e detail s o f thei r children' s devel opment an d the n insiste d tha t mother s no t pa y s o muc h attentio n t o their children . Whethe r i t wa s Ann e Morro w Lindberg h worryin g tha t Charles Jr. should tak e his bumps, or Glady s Bell Penrod wondering ho w she coul d empathiz e wit h he r children , wome n pai d attentio n t o th e

132 The

Silver Cord

psychological componen t o f thei r children' s live s an d adde d i t t o thei r list o f concern s and , i n doin g so , violated th e child-rearin g tenet s o f th e 1920s. "You r childre n d o no t appreciat e you r over-anxiety, " wrot e on e expert. "The y resen t it. " Anxiet y o r eve n concer n coul d becom e a kin d of mental fondling , leadin g to the interfering adul t mother with her silve r cord stranglin g a t th e independenc e o f he r young. 35 While wome n foun d contradiction s withi n th e mos t authoritativ e child-rearing literatur e the y als o ha d t o sor t throug h message s withi n popular cultur e tha t contradicte d th e tren d towar d devaluin g mother hood an d reducin g the emotional warmt h o f mothering. Americans ofte n held t o th e value s o f th e previou s centur y whil e admittin g som e chang e in th e circumstance s o r rol e o f thos e values . Fo r instance , Glori a Greg ory's mother-in-la w i n The Flapper Wife migh t hav e bee n th e siste r o f the infantilizin g mothe r i n The Silver Cord. Mrs . Gregor y freel y ex presses he r opinio n an d eve n appear s o n th e scen e a t inopportun e mo ments fo r Gloria , makin g i t impossibl e fo r th e flapper's fre e way s t o continue. Whe n Dic k become s il l an d mus t g o awa y fo r a rest , hi s mother goe s wit h him . Ye t Mrs . Gregor y emerge s fro m th e wor k a s a steadfast an d righteou s (i f not quit e sympathetic) figure, urgin g on Glori a the necessit y o f frugalit y an d skil l a s a homemaker . A s th e boo k ends , Gloria expresse s he r enthusias m fo r th e companionat e marriag e sh e an d Dick wil l have an d als o fo r th e prospec t o f motherhood. 36 There were , o f course , group s withi n America n societ y activel y resist ing th e cultura l trend s o f th e 1920s . Afte r 1915 , a re-create d K u Klu x Klan offere d a visio n o f America n wome n transcenden t i n thei r role s o f wife an d mother . A t leas t on e o f th e wome n i n thi s stud y wa s attracte d to th e Klan' s idealism . Glady s Bell , severa l month s befor e he r marriage , found a temporar y refug e i n Kla n rhetori c fro m he r feeling s o f ambiva lence abou t th e impendin g chang e i n he r life . " I believ e i t i s woman' s duty t o us e the Go d give n impuls e o f Motherhood," sh e wrote. Onl y th e exercise o f th e "sacre d dut y o f chil d bearin g an d conscientiou s chil d training" coul d revers e th e "swiftl y deterioratin g racia l purity " o f th e nation. Th e Kla n rhetori c calle d wome n bac k t o a n olde r notio n o f motherhood tha t hel d stron g appea l fo r man y women. 37 If Beatrice Burton' s book , lik e the Klan, called America n women bac k to a n olde r syste m o f values , som e trend s withi n chil d rearin g literatur e even i n th e 1920s , an d mor e prominentl y i n th e 1930s , urge d mother s and father s alik e t o creat e a warm famil y environment. 38 I n he r popula r novel The Homemaker, autho r an d advic e columnis t Doroth y Canfiel d

The Silver Cord 13

3

Fisher create d th e characte r o f overprotectiv e Evangelin e Knap p whos e entire lif e energ y sh e poure d int o housekeeping . A mode l o f th e ne w efficient housekeeper , Mrs . Knap p hate d he r lif e an d wor k an d resente d her childre n an d husband . Whe n circumstance s force d he r husban d int o convalescence Mrs . Knap p too k wor k a s a departmen t stor e sale s cler k and soo n foun d he r purpos e i n life . A s th e month s passe d bot h Knapp s realized thei r inne r desire s an d needs . A s the homemaker , Leste r Knap p respected th e humanit y an d individualit y o f hi s childre n an d provide d the nurturin g tha t hi s overworke d wif e neve r could. 39 Fisher believe d tha t th e fundamenta l insigh t o f th e "moder n book s and th e scientist s wh o wrot e them " wa s t o pu t onesel f i n th e child' s place, t o understan d th e need s expresse d b y th e child' s actions , an d t o give some healthy encouragemen t fo r th e developmen t o f those needs. In her nove l Fishe r show s th e warmt h an d affectio n tha t flow betwee n th e understanding fathe r an d th e thre e childre n h e nurtured . Ye t Fishe r re tained a suspicion o f motherhoo d an d o f emotiona l intensity . When Lester Knapp' s younges t so n first wen t t o hi m wit h a heartfel t reques t tha t Lester gladl y granted , th e bo y wa s overcom e wit h gratitud e tha t Leste r realized emerge d fro m " a fathomles s blacknes s o f uncertainty. " Leste r spoke almos t roughl y t o th e bo y t o mak e hi m understan d tha t th e deci sion belonge d t o hi m a s a righ t an d t o eliminat e th e emotiona l turmoi l of th e moment . "Wha t a ghastl y thin g t o hav e sensitive , helpless huma n beings absolutel y i n th e powe r o f othe r huma n beings! " Lester reflected , deciding tha t i t mus t lea d t o sadism . "That' s wha t i t i s to b e a parent, " he concluded. B y substituting mothe r fo r paren t i n his insight we can see that Fishe r retaine d th e cultura l concer n abou t th e rol e o f mothers . Thi s concern wa s no t ne w t o her ; sh e ha d articulate d i t a s earl y a s 1916 , pointing ou t i n a work o n "self-reliance " tha t th e young chil d "i s strain ing every nerve t o lear n ho w t o 'd o fo r himsel f an d hi s mother i s straining every nerve t o preven t him. " Ove r a decade late r Fishe r continue d t o urge cautio n an d commo n sens e on parents , so that the y might avoi d th e extremes o f "steam-rolle r discipline " o n th e on e hand , an d hysterica l indulgence o n th e other. 40 Dorothy Blake , a Depression-er a Lon g Islan d housewife , summe d u p the moder n mother' s dilemm a whe n sh e wrote , "Th e Victoria n mothe r knew sh e kne w best—w e onl y hop e so. " A s someon e wh o ha d grow n up i n th e decade s whe n moder n chil d rearin g ha d becom e widel y ac cepted, Blak e fully recognize d th e danger s o f the silve r cord an d th e goa l of raisin g childre n fo r independence . " I wonde r i f thes e mothers , wh o

134 The

Silver Cord

say so devotedly, ' I simply lived fo r m y children,' eve r stop to think that , in th e bac k o f thei r minds , i s th e unspoke n thought , 'M y childre n wil l live fo r me. ' " Blak e reflecte d wit h satisfactio n o n he r children' s devel opment a s the y gre w u p an d ou t o f romper s an d kiddi e car s an d wen t beyond "tota l dependenc e o n Ji m an d m e t o th e desir e t o mak e thei r own decision s an d mistakes. " Blake believed that parents shoul d provid e the bes t physica l car e fo r childre n an d goo d examples , bu t beyon d tha t parents shoul d allo w children th e freedom t o adjust t o their environmen t and t o lear n fro m thei r ow n mistakes . By the 1930s , psychology ha d becom e a not-always-welcome too l fo r bringing u p th e kids . Blak e frequentl y mention s I.Q . exam s an d chil d psychology. Th e mother' s growin g sophisticatio n mad e he r muc h mor e aware o f nuance s i n th e children' s development . Althoug h he r husban d told he r tha t to o muc h analysi s " 'isn' t goo d fo r anybody, ' " Blak e stil l wondered. O n th e on e hand , sh e kne w enoug h abou t Watson' s idea s t o recognize tha t to o muc h closenes s t o a child coul d mak e the child "emo tionally dependen t o n th e parent," bu t Blak e rejected thi s and tucke d he r children int o be d anyway . O n th e othe r hand , sh e agree d t o le t he r so n go o n a n outin g tha t sh e believe d to o fa r awa y becaus e sh e wante d t o give hi m a n experienc e o f independence . Whe n Arti e didn' t retur n wit h the othe r boys , sh e becam e frightene d fo r him , an d al l he r goo d inten tions dissolve d int o tear s whe n Arti e finally returne d wit h a polic e offi cer. She also met the challenge o f the new child-rearing trend s that urge d on parent s method s o f persuasio n rathe r tha n authority . Blak e tol d a speaker a t a P.T.A . meetin g tha t sh e though t cajolin g childre n di d no t prepare the m "fo r a life which require s that yo u d o what yo u hav e to d o and b e pleasan t abou t it. " Blak e live d throug h a transitio n i n th e com mon sens e of child rearing . She had grow n u p with moder n method s an d knew the m wel l eve n i f sh e ha d doubt s abou t som e o f thei r tenets . Bu t she als o accepte d th e underlyin g value s o f moder n chil d rearin g an d questioned th e emergin g standard s o f th e 1930s. 41 Modern chil d rearing , then, a s represented b y Holt an d Watson, gre w up in competition wit h a Victorian notio n o f mother lov e and supersede d it onl y briefly ; b y th e 1930 s a n idea l o f a muc h warme r famil y lif e be came prominent . Eve n so , moder n chil d rearin g ha d a stron g influenc e on th e child-rearin g belief s an d practice s o f th e 1920 s an d 1930s . Rais ing independen t children—tha t is , children wh o woul d cas t of f relianc e on mothers—continue d a s a widely hel d goal . At th e sam e time though , ambivalence abou t motherhoo d seem s t o hav e ha d n o impac t o n

The Silver Cord 13

5

women's eagernes s t o becom e mothers . Th e shap e tha t motherhoo d as sumed fo r an y individua l woma n wa s determine d b y a mixture o f child rearing theory an d assumptions , their ow n affectionat e response s to their children's lives , an d th e practica l limitation s o n th e tim e an d resource s available t o women . Embracing Motherhood Whatever thei r feeling s towar d thei r ow n mothers , middle-clas s wome n in th e 1920 s hel d fe w reservation s abou t becomin g mother s themselves . Winifred Willi s looke d forwar d t o havin g a chil d earl y i n he r marriag e to Tommy . " I wan t on e s o much, " sh e wrote , "tha t I a m no t goin g t o do anythin g a t al l t o prevent , poo r a s w e are. " Eve n thoug h havin g children ma y sometime s hav e brough t wome n int o collisio n wit h financial problems, an d fac e t o fac e wit h othe r change s i n thei r lives , middleclass wome n generall y looke d forwar d t o startin g families . Doroth y Smith Dushki n wrot e tha t sh e was "overjoye d becaus e o f th e event , an d filled wit h wondering s a s t o ho w 'this wil l b e when.' " Middle-clas s women i n Americ a ha d take n th e lea d i n limitin g thei r fertility . B y th e 1920s th e averag e woma n bor e onl y abou t tw o children . Th e smalle r number o f childre n allowe d parent s t o provid e mor e materia l resource s to eac h chil d and , i n spit e o f th e warning s o f child-rearin g literature , t o give more attentio n t o th e developmen t o f eac h child. 42 Although women , o n th e whole, looked forwar d t o motherhood, the y frequently expresse d concern s abou t delivery . Edn a Clair e Ferris , fro m an earlie r generation , mad e n o mentio n o f he r secon d pregnanc y i n he r diary unti l Apri l 5 , 1913 , whe n sh e wrote , " I thin k I a m goin g t o b e sick." He r so n wa s bor n Apri l 9 . Sh e wrote , simply , "I t wa s a har d birth." Moder n medicine , whic h ha d take n th e pai n awa y fro m man y areas o f lif e an d reduce d th e dange r o f man y medica l procedures , ma y have heightene d th e drea d o f pain . Illnes s accompanie d Leil a Secor' s pregnancy i n 1918 , fo r whic h he r docto r gav e he r morphine . Isabell e McNelis Sickle r expecte d bot h medicin e an d bee r t o hel p he r throug h the sicknes s o f th e earl y month s o f he r first pregnancy. 43 The prospec t o f motherhoo d als o brough t wome n fac e t o fac e wit h mortality. Anne Morrow Lindberg h fel t a n "overpowerin g sens e of time, and peopl e changin g an d goin g an d othe r peopl e takin g thei r place. " Fear fo r th e health o f the newbor n an d fo r th e life o f the mother appear s occasionally i n th e persona l paper s o f women . Doroth y Thompson , al -

136 The

Silver Cord

though delighte d t o hav e a child , worrie d tha t he r advance d ag e migh t make fo r complication s i n th e delivery . Thompson' s deliver y wen t ver y smoothly, althoug h he r concern ove r the dangers o f delivery were appro priate t o th e obstetric s o f th e period . Carolin e Gordon , i n th e hospita l for a n appendectomy , hear d th e "ga y voice s o f youn g people " arrivin g for th e birt h o f a child . Jus t a s th e Caesaria n deliver y ended , however , the mothe r died. 44 Winifred Willi s seem s t o hav e ha d littl e concer n abou t he r life , al though sh e feared tha t sh e might lose control of herself i n delivery, "cal m &C natural on e moment, & a screaming, selfless thing the next. . . . Childbirth ha s n o terro r fo r me , sav e onl y tha t I migh t scream. " Whe n sh e had he r delivery , however , th e docto r use d analgesi c fo r th e firs t stage s of labor . "O f course , I had ethe r fo r th e grand e finale." Lik e a growin g number o f urba n women , Willis had chose n to sideste p the pain o f deliv ery throug h th e us e o f scopolamine . Doroth y Smit h Dushki n als o re membered "n o grea t pai n onl y a serie s o f curious , awesom e & excitin g sensations. Dr . Kell y gav e m e ga s immediatel y fo r ever y pai n a s i t cam e on." 45 For middle-clas s wome n i n th e 1920 s an d 1930 s wh o wishe d t o con tinue thei r careers , childre n brough t specia l difficulties . Althoug h Doro thy Canfiel d Fishe r migh t rais e th e issu e o f whic h spous e wa s bette r suited t o th e rol e o f keepin g hous e an d nurturin g children , eve n he r pathbreaking wor k lef t a divisio n o f labo r betwee n wor k a t hom e an d work outsid e th e home . Colleg e wome n lik e Marth a Lavel l an d he r friends migh t debat e th e issu e of who shoul d sta y home, but mos t Amer icans too k fo r grante d tha t marrie d mother s woul d kee p house. Wealth y women, lik e Jessi e Lloyd' s mother , wh o coul d affor d servants , coul d afford a career . Les s prosperou s familie s ha d t o struggl e t o mak e tw o careers a possibility. Leil a Secor , i n the months followin g he r first child' s birth, searche d i n vai n fo r reliabl e servant s a t th e modes t wage s sh e an d her husban d coul d affor d t o pay . Carolin e Gordo n complaine d repeat edly o f havin g to o littl e tim e fo r he r writing . Anticipatin g leavin g he r daughter behin d a secon d tim e a s sh e an d he r husban d travele d t o France, Gordon wrote , "God, I' d lov e to get out o f the cares of a menage for a year! " Althoug h Doroth y Thompso n an d Sinclai r Lewi s wante d the bes t fo r thei r son , Michael , Lewi s ha d littl e t o d o wit h th e boy . Thompson, stil l activ e a s a journalist , ha d t o hir e servant s fo r mos t housekeeping an d mad e specia l effort s t o hir e servant s wit h childre n t o become Michael' s playmates. 46

The Silver Cord 13

7

Balancing th e demand s o f househol d an d caree r becam e especiall y difficult i n th e fac e o f th e presumptio n tha t marrie d wome n shoul d no t work. Clar a Savage , press secretar y fo r th e National America n Women' s Suffrage Associatio n an d the n Good Housekeeping corresponden t dur ing World Wa r I , married Pulitze r Prize-winning journalist Harold Little dale i n 1920 . Afte r marriag e Clar a Savag e Littledal e ende d he r full-tim e career fo r severa l year s whil e sh e raise d thei r daughte r an d wrot e free lance piece s fo r Good Housekeeping an d othe r periodicals . I n 1927 , however, sh e becam e edito r o f th e ne w Parents magazin e an d a n influ ential guid e t o moder n chil d rearing . Abou t 193 0 sh e apparentl y wrot e a third-perso n sketc h abou t hersel f entitle d " A Mothe r Wh o Guide s th e Rearing o f 500,00 0 Children. " Th e typescrip t original s o f th e piec e shows th e effort s tha t Littledal e mad e t o mee t an y question s tha t migh t arise aroun d he r statu s a s workin g mother . I n versio n on e sh e tell s th e putative interviewer , " ' I ofte n thin k tha t th e happies t wome n i n th e world ma y b e thos e wh o lov e t o d o nothin g bu t kee p hous e an d tak e care o f children—an d hav e curl y hair ! But , o f course , i t al l depend s o n what you'r e use d to. ' " Th e draf t end s with th e assuranc e tha t he r "hus band an d childre n sho w n o ba d effect s fro m th e fact tha t Mrs . Littledal e has a job. " Th e secon d versio n o f th e articl e goe s eve n furthe r i n em bracing (althoug h subtl y altering ) th e culture' s preferenc e fo r nonwork ing mothers. Instead o f the quot e endin g with "curl y hair, " that sentenc e is crosse d ou t an d replace d b y a handwritte n insertion : "Homemakin g itself i s the mos t importan t jo b an d unles s a woma n i s speciall y traine d and qualifie d fo r othe r wor k o r unles s economi c necessit y make s i t im perative fo r he r t o hav e a pai d positio n sh e wil l probabl y find he r greatest usefulnes s an d happines s a s a homemaker—especially whil e her children ar e growin g up. " Specia l circumstances , includin g a clear talen t for a profession , migh t alte r a woman' s natura l vocation . Onl y s o fa r did th e edito r o f Parents encourag e mother s t o work . As edito r o f Parents magazine , Clar a Savag e Littledal e woul d hel p modern mother s understan d th e trends within chil d raising as these came to prominence . A s w e hav e see n above , Littledal e warne d agains t th e dangers o f th e silve r cor d i n he r Good Housekeeping article s durin g th e early 1920s . Eve n befor e this , i n he r day s a s a singl e woma n profes sional, sh e had reflecte d o n th e demand s o f raisin g children . Sh e did no t embrace a particular approac h i n he r journa l i n 1916 ; rather, sh e recog nized th e potentia l valu e o f olde r convention s fo r childre n bu t added , " I couldn't teac h m y childre n arbitrar y standard s o f righ t an d wrong . Be -

138 The

Silver Cord

cause i t i s too external. " Instead , sh e hope d t o giv e them understandin g and emotiona l response s tha t woul d hel p the m "t o lov e other people , t o dread t o hur t anyone , t o b e alway s generous. " Lik e Doroth y Canfiel d Fisher, Clar a Savag e Littledal e believe d tha t parent s coul d hel p childre n develop socia l skill s and emotiona l strategie s for successfu l living. 47 Perhaps mor e importan t tha n th e specifi c goal s o f chil d raisin g i n Littledale's reflectio n i s her attitud e tha t "ol d ideas " an d "conventions " had onl y limite d value . Moder n wome n wante d moder n approache s t o raising thei r children . The y believe d tha t the y live d i n a n er a tha t ha d more t o offe r childre n an d the y wante d t o fre e themselve s an d thei r children fro m th e limitation s o f olde r values . Doroth y Smit h Dushkin , who resente d th e oppressivenes s o f he r ow n "Puritan " upbringing , fel t "horror" a t th e prospec t tha t he r children' s "initiativ e &C mentality " might b e suppressed int o "watchfu l regar d fo r th e average social convention." I n he r caree r a s a teache r sh e hope d t o brin g t o he r student s feelings first o f confidenc e an d the n o f independence . Marth a Lavel l be lieved tha t childre n shoul d hav e s o muc h contac t wit h othe r childre n that the y woul d hav e n o hesitatio n abou t thei r relation s wit h othe r chil dren an d tha t the y woul d als o lear n abou t se x withou t worrie s an d misunderstandings. Lik e Martha Lavell , modern wome n wante d t o rais e children wh o woul d understan d "th e whol e unvarnishe d truth, " wh o would liv e withou t th e repressiv e attitude s o f earlie r generation s an d s o lead healthie r lives . The y als o believe d tha t th e advance s o f huma n knowledge woul d mak e chil d rearin g mor e scientifi c an d giv e childre n better opportunitie s i n life . Glady s Bel l Penrod , fo r instance , wante d t o include i n he r prenata l car e "th e theor y o f menta l influence " t o hel p th e child's development. 48 Yet although wome n too k u p modern child-rearin g idea s with a ready belief i n Watson's cal l for "better brought up babies,'" they see m to hav e rejected, virtuall y unanimously , on e o f th e centra l tenet s o f Watson' s approach. Watso n recommende d tha t mother s limi t emotiona l involve ment wit h childre n s o a s t o forestal l repeate d an d damagin g "lov e reac tions." Watson seem s to hav e place d hi s theory a t odd s wit h fundamen tal forces i n women's lives . Mothers foun d childre n a source of unlimite d emotional experience . "The y ca n giv e yo u suc h thrill s o f pride , suc h hopeless discouragement , suc h terro r an d worry , suc h relie f an d happi ness," wrot e Doroth y Blake . Winifre d Willi s coul d hardl y contai n th e joy sh e fel t ove r he r first child . Sh e coul d no t imagin e a complet e an d fulfilling lif e withou t children . "M y child, " sh e wrote , "melt s m y bein g

The Silver Cord 13

9

to a pur e & exquisit e emotio n o f tenderness. " Thre e week s late r sh e wrote tha t he r bab y "enrapture s me , ravishes me. " Doroth y Thompson , separated fro m he r so n du e t o th e demand s o f caree r an d problem s i n her marriage , wrot e tha t sh e ache d "wit h lonelines s an d loss . H e i s dearer t o m e tha n m y life. " Ann e Morro w Lindberg h trie d earnestl y t o follow advic e tha t warne d agains t coddlin g an d overmotherin g tha t sh e found i n Watson' s boo k an d othe r sources . Ye t whe n he r husband' s business o r othe r demand s kep t he r awa y fro m th e baby , sh e yearned fo r more tim e wit h he r chil d an d regrette d whe n sh e arrive d hom e to o lat e to spen d tim e with Charle s Jr. 49 Child-rearing theorie s see m t o hav e falle n b y th e waysid e i n th e fac e of th e minute-to-minut e demand s o f motherhood . Doroth y Blake , as we have seen , hel d t o a fe w importan t idea s an d seeme d t o hav e a read y evaluation o f child-rearin g advic e that cam e her way. Still , she found th e reality o f chil d rearin g a constant challenge . Mothers, especially those of younger children , foun d littl e tim e t o reflec t o n th e theor y o f chil d car e and man y ha d t o giv e u p keepin g regula r diarie s altogether . Glady s Bel l Penrod wrote afte r on e month o f motherhood, "Nearl y hal f o f June gone and I never wrot e a line . I do no t kno w whethe r th e adven t o f a bab y i s occupying m y tim e an d interes t t o th e exten t o f causin g thi s neglect , o r whether I am merel y laz y abou t it. " A s the month s passe d he r situatio n changed little : "Fo r reason s 'wise ' o r 'otherwise ' I a m neglectin g m y journal," sh e wrot e whe n he r bab y wa s fou r month s old . "Wei r seem s to monopoliz e ever y spar e momen t an d wearines s get s th e bette r o f me." 50 "My So n i s a ba d littl e Bolshevik, " Leil a Seco r wrot e i n a letter , noting tha t h e cried wheneve r sh e turned awa y fro m him . " I have picke d him u p a doze n time s thi s afternoon , onl y t o hav e hi s tear s tur n lik e magic t o smiles . . . . He ha s slep t onl y a half hou r sinc e lunch. . . . I continue t o hav e a strenuou s time. " Doroth y Smit h Dushki n ha d a nurs e helping wit h th e childre n s o tha t she , i n turn , coul d wor k wit h he r hus band i n thei r musi c school . Whe n th e nurs e wen t awa y o n he r da y off , or o n vacation , al l th e responsibilit y fel l t o Dushkin . "Childre n ar e nerve-wracking & exhaustin g eve n whe n they'r e good. " Sh e seem s t o have worke d towar d he r goa l o f givin g th e childre n a n upbringin g tha t would allo w the m t o gro w int o independen t an d self-relian t adults , ye t she found th e work impossibl e withou t help . "There i s so much physica l energy &c resourcefulness require d i n inventin g pleasan t occupations , avoiding quarrel s & argument s & jus t providin g adequat e supervision. "

140 The

Silver Cord

Even so , sh e wante d t o recogniz e thei r integrit y an d individuality . " I have n o plan s o r idea s fo r them . The y wil l sho w m e wha t the y nee d a s they develop." 51 Caroline Gordon' s letter s revea l th e ambiguit y o f moder n nurture . Like Dushkin, Gordo n wante d he r daughte r Nanc y t o achiev e independ ence, fo r instanc e b y choosin g he r ow n clothe s fo r school . Ye t Nanc y selected clothe s s o tha t he r classmate s woul d approve . Gordo n als o fol lowed th e precep t o f moder n motherin g tha t urge d mother s t o leav e children wit h nurse s an d foreg o constan t anxiety . When sh e could, Gor don lef t Nanc y i n th e car e o f a mai d s o sh e coul d continu e he r writing . The mai d tol d th e gir l tha t sh e migh t writ e a boo k to o whe n sh e gre w up. " 'Don' t mentio n n o book s t o me, ' Nanc y said , 'Mam a ha s nearl y drove m e crazy, lockin g herself u p ever y morning.' " 52 Motherhood's Demands on Self: Two Illustrations A close examinatio n o f th e child-rearin g experience s o f tw o wome n ca n suggest th e range o f emotiona l experience s tha t middle-clas s women dis covered a s mothers . Glady s Bel l Penrod an d Miria m Va n Water s raise d children durin g th e earl y 1930s , an d bot h struggle d wit h th e goal s o f instilling disciplin e an d fosterin g independen t personalities . Bot h women, whethe r the y attempte d t o hol d t o th e curren t o f child-rearin g literature o r t o ignor e it , foun d thei r childre n endles s source s o f emo tional intensity . Ye t th e difference s betwee n th e concern s expresse d b y the tw o wome n illustrat e tha t differen t individual s brin g uniqu e mean ings to commo n cultura l materials . As w e sa w i n a n earlie r chapter , Glady s Bel l Penro d experience d ro mantic lov e an d th e prospec t o f marriag e a s a crisi s o f th e self . Mother hood rarel y appeare d i n he r journa l a s a motiv e fo r marriage , an d whe n it di d appea r sh e treate d motherhoo d a s a "grea t Heritage " o r missio n of wome n rathe r tha n a s a desir e fo r children . Sh e an d Marli n Penro d planned t o practic e som e for m o f contraception , althoug h the y see m t o have ha d onl y limite d knowledg e abou t birt h control . I n fact , al l o f he r pregnancies wer e unplanne d an d seeme d a t leas t superficiall y unwanted . Less tha n si x month s afte r thei r marriage , Glady s Penro d learne d tha t she was pregnant . Sh e responded t o th e new s with a mixture o f concer n for th e futur e an d happines s a t th e prospec t o f a child . Unlik e he r expe rience with marriage , however, Glady s reconcile d hersel f t o motherhoo d relatively quickly , i n th e spac e o f on e journa l entry . "O f course , I re -

$.i Th e Penro d family : Glady s an d Marli n (Red ) ar e standing . Seated ar e DeLane , Sara h (Red' s mother) , an d Weir . Courtes y o f Mr. an d Mrs . DeLan e Penrod .

142. The

Silver Cord

belled a t first, crie d a little and frette d a lot," sh e wrote i n the same entr y where sh e first recorde d he r pregnancy . Sh e went on : "bu t I think I a m over that now , fo r a while a t least . I'd rathe r hav e known mor e abou t it , given a bette r heritag e etc . but fo r onc e I didn't hav e my way. . . . I want to liv e now fo r m y baby." 53 Gladys coul d tak e u p th e rol e an d identit y o f motherhoo d wit h littl e hesitation i n spit e o f he r ambivalen t feeling s towar d he r ow n mother . She sa w he r mothe r a s havin g live d fo r he r children . O n th e on e hand , Gladys wrot e repeatedl y o f he r feeling s o f tendernes s an d regar d fo r he r mother. Fo r instance, in a letter t o her mother sh e told her , " I don't hav e any friend s tha t I' m sur e o f excep t you an d m y husband. " O n th e othe r hand, Glady s seeme d t o struggl e i n he r ow n min d ove r he r mother' s approach t o raisin g her . He r mothe r lef t he r "t o sin k o r swi m o r stan d on m y ow n feet . . . . She didn' t nag , o r pry , o r giv e advic e o r blam e o r expect gratitud e o r whin e or—anything . Sh e wa s jus t Mother , on e o f the bes t psychologist s th e worl d ha s ha d fo r sh e just wa s naturall y righ t in he r training. " Glady s coul d affir m he r mother' s car e o f he r i n term s that mak e perfec t sens e in the context o f moder n chil d rearing . She went on t o expres s a n interestin g caveat . " I kno w ther e wer e a fe w thing s lef t out o f m y life—a s lov e & kisse s an d confidences , bu t perhap s I' m a better perso n today. " Glady s resolve d th e ambivalenc e sh e fel t towar d her mothe r b y ignorin g th e unappealin g aspec t o f he r relatio n t o he r mother an d als o b y affirming a generalized idea l o f motherhood. 54 Although Glady s unhesitatingly affirme d th e ideal of motherhood, sh e looked forwar d t o childbirt h wit h som e apprehension . Il l durin g th e early month s o f th e pregnancy , sh e praye d fo r strengt h t o "figh t th e poisons o f m y bod y an d conquer. " Sh e also feare d tha t childbirt h migh t bring unbearabl e pai n an d perhap s eve n b e fatal. " I don' t wan t t o die, " she wrot e i n he r first entr y abou t th e pregnancy . Sh e coul d dea l wit h some o f thi s anxiet y b y assimilatin g i t t o th e large r experienc e o f motherhood—" 'Dow n thru ' th e valle y o f th e shadow, ' i s the sacrific e a life make s fo r a life. " Eve n i n th e hour s jus t befor e givin g birt h Glady s found tim e t o reflec t o n he r "vagu e suspens e an d drea d [of ] th e ordeal . . . . Tho' I lov e m y freedom , I canno t hav e i t alway s an d sinc e I a m t o be on e o f th e 'Mother' s o f Men, ' I may jus t a s well begi n th e significan t task, no w a s later. " Pregnancy als o affecte d he r relationshi p wit h he r husband. "M y love r husband seem s more tender an d lovin g than before, " sh e wrote just afte r discovering tha t sh e wa s pregnant . "H e simpl y doesn' t kno w ho w t o

The Silver Cord 14

3

love m e enoug h t o satisf y himsel f fo r a fe w hour s he' s absent . H e look s at m e a s on e wh o worships—h e i s simpl y powerles s t o resis t an y loo k or touc h o f mine. " Th e prospec t o f fatherhoo d mad e Marli n Penro d more attentive , mor e loving , an d mor e pliable—mor e lik e th e ma n Gladys alway s wante d hi m t o be . A t leas t durin g he r firs t pregnancy , Red too k o n fatherhoo d wit h eve n les s ambivalenc e tha n Glady s too k on motherhood. 55 Over th e years , Gladys' s idea s abou t raisin g he r childre n becam e a complicated mi x o f pragmati c response s t o situations , idea s gleane d from contemporar y literature , and a continued belie f i n positive thinkin g and emotiona l management . "I f I wer e wealthy, " sh e wrot e i n 1929 , "I'd bu y al l th e book s tha t wer e o r ar e publishe d o n 'Chil d Training ' and 'psycholog y o f Childhood ' an d 'Menta l Hygiene. ' " In a 193 0 note book sh e liste d eleve n book s o n thes e topics , includin g work s b y Doro thy Canfiel d Fisher , Ad a Har t Arlitt , an d Michae l V . O'Shea . Th e rela tive importanc e o f heredit y an d environment , on e o f th e grea t question s of socia l scienc e durin g th e 1920s , als o struc k Glady s a s a crucia l issu e for he r children . Althoug h sh e believed tha t thei r fathe r woul d giv e them "honor an d upstandin g manhood " a s thei r birthright , sh e cam e dow n on the side of environment a s having the most weight. 56 " I hope the Lor d will spar e m e t o a n ag e wher e I shal l hav e ha d opportunit y t o d o al l i n my powe r t o mak e environmen t coun t mos t i n m y sons ' lives. " Sh e referred t o a Dr . Cran e a s he r authorit y whe n sh e reflecte d tha t "th e mother teache s fro m love " s o tha t sh e shoul d "stan d firs t i n exampl e and i n influence. " Childre n wh o imitate d mother s wit h goo d characte r would themselve s becom e mor e refine d a s the y gre w up . "Therefor e what a responsibilit y w e have . Beautifu l fo r children' s sakes . Learne d and patien t fo r thei r benefit." 57 In apparent agreemen t with the reading she had done , Gladys believe d that emotiona l response s t o th e action s o f childre n mus t b e measure d and appropriate . Arlit t an d othe r writer s warne d tha t parent s shoul d spare childre n undu e stimulation , irritability , an d othe r emotiona l tur moil. Gladys , wh o i n additio n t o havin g rea d Arlit t als o rea d som e o f the curren t literatur e o n th e nervou s problem s o f children , too k thes e warnings seriously . I n her on e concession t o the widespread emphasi s o n regularity an d schedule , sh e wondered i f sh e could spar e the infan t Wei r from coli c i f sh e stoppe d feedin g hi m "ever y tim e h e squirms. " Glady s also readil y accepte d th e connectio n mad e i n advic e literatur e betwee n her mood s an d thos e o f he r child—"whe n I' m irritable , h e is , when I' m

144 The

Silver Cord

angry, h e i s angry. " Sh e adopte d a serie s o f approache s mean t t o limi t her negativ e influence , suc h a s keepin g he r voic e low , sayin g ver y little , and adoptin g consisten t approache s t o ba d behavior . Just a s Arlitt urge d "willing obedience, " othe r writer s o f th e perio d believe d tha t parent s could gai n th e cooperatio n o f childre n throug h creativ e an d consisten t approaches. Glady s seem s to hav e take n fo r grante d tha t he r son' s resis tance t o cooperatio n turne d o n he r ow n shortcomings . "Poo r littl e chap," sh e wrote, "h e respond s s o well t o patienc e an d rebel s s o well t o impatience tha t i t seem s tha t I shoul d tr y a littl e harde r t o conque r m y temper an d remembe r tha t I' m onl y a 'bi g human ' tryin g t o dominee r a little huma n b y my siz e rather tha n b y strategi c leadership. " Glady s per sistently hel d u p a notio n o f affectio n tha t differe d fro m th e on e curren t with Watson , Arlitt , an d othe r influentia l advic e writer s o f th e day . Gladys expresse d littl e ambivalenc e ove r he r affectio n fo r he r childre n and apparentl y disregarde d advic e tha t ra n contrar y t o he r visio n o f motherly love. 58 While Glady s dre w freely , i f selectively , fro m th e child-rearin g litera ture availabl e t o her , sh e persistently applie d he r long-hel d belief s abou t emotional managemen t an d positiv e thinkin g t o he r children' s behavior . She hoped he r ow n mood s woul d serv e a s a mode l t o he r sons , an d sh e believed tha t a "psychologica l connection " existe d betwee n he r min d and he r children . Durin g pregnancy , fo r instance , Glady s ha d attempte d to influenc e th e developin g chil d throug h he r ow n mood s an d behaviors . Because o f th e importanc e sh e gav e t o he r rol e a s model , guide , an d teacher t o he r children , he r child-rearin g theor y demande d tha t sh e possess consisten t an d virtuall y unattainabl e characte r traits , includin g "strength, courage , an d patience " an d bountifu l affection . Whe n thes e failed her , Glady s punishe d hersel f wit h he r ow n sens e o f failure . A fe w months afte r he r secon d son' s birt h sh e wrote , " I don' t believ e I'v e gained i n grac e durin g th e week . I wa s terribl y mea n yesterda y an d I don't thin k muc h o f m y abilit y t o 'trai n u p a chil d i n th e wa y h e shoul d go.' I think I' m a failure." 59 Just a s Glady s seemingl y ignore d th e advic e literature' s guidanc e o n tenderness an d affection , sh e als o misse d th e encouragemen t tha t Arlit t and Doroth y Canfiel d Fishe r offere d mothers . Both advised tha t mother s should no t becom e overl y self-conscious . The y shoul d recogniz e tha t both to o muc h disciplin e o r to o muc h indulgenc e wor k agains t th e child's bes t interests . An d mother s shoul d fre e themselve s fro m self condemnation fo r th e occasiona l mistake . Glady s coul d no t forgiv e her -

The Silver Cord 14

5

self i n thi s way . Sh e embraced standard s o f conduc t tha t demande d tha t she alway s thin k positivel y an d tak e th e mos t healthy-minde d attitud e toward he r sons ' behaviors . Whe n sh e inevitabl y faile d t o d o this , sh e saw hersel f a s a failur e an d suffere d bitte r self-recriminations. 60 While Glady s Penro d frequentl y foun d faul t wit h hersel f a s a mother , motherhood remaine d th e role that gav e her the greatest satisfaction . Sh e addressed he r occasiona l sens e o f inadequac y b y lookin g fo r a sourc e o f emotional uplift . Sh e reflecte d i n on e diar y entr y tha t he r lif e wa s muc h better tha n th e live s o f mos t people . Glady s ofte n employe d thi s versio n of lookin g o n th e brigh t side ; that is , by noting ho w ba d thing s were fo r others, one's ow n lo t may appea r suddenl y mor e desirable . Not onl y di d she hav e a hardworkin g an d sobe r husban d instea d o f " a drunke n o r 'no-good' lout, " sh e als o sa w th e man y peopl e hur t b y th e Depressio n that ha d take n hol d o f the country. Ther e were als o clear satisfaction s t o motherhood. He r husban d appreciate d he r har d wor k wit h th e children . And sh e als o ha d frequen t experience s o f overpowerin g affectio n fo r he r children. Althoug h sh e chide d hersel f fo r "grouching " abou t th e con stant demand s o f chil d care , sh e als o recalle d ho w preciou s he r so n ha d seemed t o he r whe n h e was sic k an d seeme d i n danger . Sh e brough t he r reflection t o a clos e wit h a praye r fo r "strength , courage , patience , an d wisdom." He r desir e fo r strength , courage , an d patienc e wer e no t new . Five year s befor e sh e ha d hope d fo r th e sam e thre e qualitie s a s sh e looked forwar d t o th e birt h o f he r first baby . I n th e earlie r passage , however, sh e als o hope d fo r healt h an d beauty . Afte r five year s sh e ha d substituted wisdom . Th e need s o f th e young wif e ha d remaine d constan t in som e respects , bu t no w th e mothe r o f tw o coul d giv e u p he r earlie r desire fo r feminin e attractivenes s an d hop e fo r cleare r idea s o f ho w t o raise her tw o sons. 61 Miriam Va n Water s cam e fro m th e first generatio n o f college educated wome n reformers . Althoug h sh e wa s bor n i n Greensburg , Pennsylvania, onl y abou t fort y mile s fro m Glady s Penrod' s hom e i n El derton, Va n Water s gre w u p i n Portland , Oregon , an d attende d th e University o f Oregon . Sh e wen t o n t o stud y psycholog y an d anthropolog y at Clar k Universit y i n Massachusetts , wher e sh e earne d a Ph.D . wit h a dissertation o n adolescen t girls . B y 1913 , whe n sh e wa s grante d th e Ph.D., Va n Water s ha d alread y becom e activ e i n reformin g th e car e o f juvenile girl s i n th e Massachusett s cour t system . Fro m 191 4 onwar d sh e worked wit h juvenil e adolescen t girls , a s hea d o f reformatorie s i n Oregon, California , and , finally, Massachusetts . During her work i n Cal-

j . 2 Miria m Va n Waters . Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e College .

The Silver Cord 14

7

ifornia, a s both a reformatory administrato r an d cour t referee, sh e wrote Youth in Conflict (1925 ) an d Parents on Probation (1927) . With a growing national reputation , Va n Water s wa s invite d t o work o n th e juvenil e sections o f th e Harvar d Crim e Surve y i n 1927 , an d i n 193 2 sh e wa s appointed superintenden t o f th e Women's Reformator y a t Framingham . She would continu e a s superintenden t unti l 1957 , earnin g prais e fo r th e success o f he r institutio n an d he r leadershi p i n th e field o f juvenil e jus tice.62 Van Water s neve r married , bu t i n 193 2 sh e adopte d a ten-year-ol d girl who m sh e ha d com e t o kno w throug h th e Californi a cour t system . Sarah woul d brin g Va n Water s bot h jo y an d frustration . Fo r Va n Wa ters, child rearin g becam e a project o f the sel f that require d bot h shapin g the personality o f th e chil d i n her car e an d makin g demand s o n he r ow n inner resources . Whenever Va n Water s reflecte d o n Sarah' s conduct , sh e also connecte d he r observation s t o a wider theor y o f conduc t an d t o he r personal struggle s t o achiev e th e idea l o f th e theor y tha t sh e calle d vita l conduct. Culturally, Va n Water s live d i n bot h th e Progressiv e an d th e moder n eras a t th e sam e time . Lik e man y wome n i n Progressiv e reform , sh e maintained clos e tie s t o othe r women . In he r attitud e towar d pai n sh e seemed t o embod y Victoria n reserv e an d stoicism . Afte r a hors e ridin g accident i n th e earl y 1930 s sh e suffere d "sta b afte r stab " o f pai n i n th e hospital. But when aske d i f she wanted a drink o r ether sh e refused both : "above al l else you want clearness" Va n Waters believe d that when pai n threatened t o engulf , th e "matur e an d competent " individua l ha d re course t o awarenes s o f others , amon g who m sh e include d he r daughte r Sarah. Lik e th e mothe r i n labor , sh e woul d no t allo w pai n t o conque r her. Van Waters' s relianc e o n calm , altruisti c sufferin g reflect s th e values of a n earlie r perio d whe n th e idea l o f servic e hel d greate r importanc e and whe n medicin e offere d fewe r alternative s fo r avoidin g pain. 63 Van Waters' s relatio n t o he r mothe r seem s t o hav e draw n n o clea r shape fro m eithe r th e Victoria n o r moder n period . Sh e clearl y care d deeply fo r he r mother , bringin g he r elderl y mothe r t o liv e wit h he r i n Framingham afte r he r father' s death . Ye t Va n Waters' s mothe r ha d fre quently lef t he r alon e i n Orego n whil e sh e returne d t o visi t famil y i n Pennsylvania. This may have attenuate d th e closeness of the two women . Van Water s seem s t o hav e ha d fe w moment s o f mothe r worship . Sh e traced he r ideal s t o he r fathe r an d considere d hi m th e mode l fo r he r life.64

148 The

Silver Cord

The superintendent' s da y a t Framingha m ofte n bega n befor e break fast, an d Va n Water s extende d he r wor k schedul e unti l midnigh t t o giv e her tim e fo r writing . Car e fo r Sara h ha d t o come , i n part , fro m staff , servants, family , an d friends . O n he r list s o f activitie s fo r th e day , tim e with Sara h coul d appea r a s on e mor e schedule d activity : "8:15-9:4 5 Sarah: Bath e &c car e fo r boil : Rea d Stall y & Co[.j " In a lis t o f action s she neede d t o tak e befor e leavin g o n vacatio n sh e include d "House hold—: Sara h an d responsibility, " followe d b y th e trainin g o f interns , articles and a speech sh e needed t o write, meetings to attend, and depart ments to atten d to . In her journals an d commonplac e books , Van Water s included chil d rearing as one more task i n a busy and demandin g life . But i f raisin g a chil d require d carefu l scheduling , i t als o dre w fro m Van Waters feeling s o f delight , tenderness, and frustration . Althoug h sh e never simpl y wrot e o f generalize d feeling s fo r he r daughter , Va n Water s frequently commente d o n Sarah' s behavior . Sarah' s act s see m alway s t o have ha d som e emotiona l valence . "Sara h goe s t o be d o n time : she is a n angel." "Th e ne w da y start s beautifully . Sara h i s a n angel—he r eager ness fo r schoo l show s growth. " "Sarah : Be d X A hr . lat e bu t a lovel y 'going concern'—ne w consideratio n fo r he r Mummie. " Fa r mor e ofte n bedtimes, mornings, an d schoo l turne d int o time s o f frustration fo r Mir iam Va n Waters . Althoug h sh e trie d t o giv e Sara h a carefull y planne d routine, th e littl e gir l di d no t alway s appreciat e th e developmenta l ad vantage thi s gav e her . On e mornin g Va n Water s reporte d tha t Sarah' s face wa s "ful l o f purpose—but i t was (naturally ) He r Purpose.—di d no t drink orang e juic e til l 3r d request—lef t Dr . Chac e waitin g 5 min . N o clearing of f o f downstairs. " Whe n Va n Water s confronte d Sara h wit h her failings , bot h o f the m wen t awa y feelin g unhapp y ove r th e incident . Discussions wit h teacher s ofte n deal t wit h Sarah' s lazines s an d irrespon sibility.65 For Va n Waters , chil d rearin g cam e withi n he r broade r reflection s o n self an d th e nurturin g o f ful l humanity . "W e posi t a 'child, ' " sh e bega n an abbreviate d discussio n o f child development . Rathe r than clear stages, Van Water s assume d a proces s o f growin g consciousnes s o f sel f an d "non-self," wit h th e acquisitio n o f emotiona l response s suc h a s "won der, worship , amusement , compassion " followe d b y "deepenin g aware ness o f th e sel f bein g adequate. " Thi s developmen t o f sel f applie d no t only t o childre n bu t t o an y individual , chil d o r adult . A s self-awarenes s grows, Va n Water s believed , i t woul d entai l ne w relation s wit h other s and ne w action s connectin g th e individua l t o th e world . Man y peopl e

The Silver Cord 14

9

achieve character , " a deposi t o f habit s o f righ t living. " They follo w rou tines, buil d home s an d institutions , an d liv e according t o "fixe d mores. " But althoug h thes e peopl e hav e overcom e th e wors t danger s o f chaoti c living, the y mis s fulle r communio n wit h th e worl d aroun d the m an d " 'whisper s o f the infinite.' " Ye t these individuals held within themselve s a lif e forc e tha t Va n Water s referre d t o a s vita l conduct . Livin g i n a disciplined manne r opene d th e possibilit y o f finding withi n onesel f a source o f life-transformin g power. 66 Whereas Van Waters describe d vita l conduct i n several different ways , the concep t alway s include d th e exercis e o f th e wil l t o shap e one' s ow n life an d als o a n idea l o f service . I n vita l conduc t on e woul d liv e mor e fully eac h momen t an d liv e i n som e sens e fo r others . Severa l strand s o f early-twentieth-century thinkin g me t i n vita l conduct . Th e progressiv e ideal o f servic e appeare d ther e i n ful l force , a s di d a kin d o f abundanc e therapy tha t calle d fo r th e individua l t o discove r greate r power s withi n and s o giv e th e individua l a mor e authenti c life . Min d cur e probabl y made it s contribution , a s di d th e Episcopalia n spiritualit y o f Va n Wa ters's ministe r father . Vita l conduc t als o fit comfortabl y wit h th e child rearing advic e o f moder n experts. 67 Van Waters measure d he r ow n conduc t agains t thi s ideal of vital con duct an d ofte n foun d hersel f wanting . Eac h da y demande d plannin g from beginnin g t o en d "t o avoi d senseles s repetition , an d t o capture — channels fo r vita l conduct. " Th e da y mus t includ e stabilit y an d routin e but als o ha d t o leav e roo m fo r spontaneit y an d novelty . Lik e Glady s Penrod, Va n Water s ofte n complaine d o f losin g control . A t 10:30 , afte r a demandin g day , sh e foun d hersel f "over-stimulated , unde r disciplined , had los t th e threa d o f consciou s control , an d th e meaning o f th e day. " The limit s o f self-control , o f course, appeared eve n more frequently i n Sarah's behavior . Va n Water s worrie d tha t Sara h di d no t full y us e he r possessions, suc h a s her bicycl e o r oi l paints. Sh e didn't tak e proper car e of th e horse s an d wen t fro m wantin g rolle r skate s t o wanting t o lear n t o play th e banjo . "Ther e simpl y ar e n o abidin g interests , bu t rathe r a n absorption i n th e fas t flowing ones. " Suc h lac k o f concentrate d interes t directly oppose d th e centra l valu e o f vita l conduc t o f makin g discipline d use o f ever y moment . Fo r Va n Waters , ther e wa s a direc t lin k betwee n her ow n disciplin e an d he r daughter's . Afte r reflectin g o n Sarah' s lac k of prudence wit h he r allowance , sh e wen t on : " I suppos e th e indirec t method o f influenc e (controlin g [sic] my ow n shor t comings ) i s the onl y effective one. " I n a n inciden t tha t Va n Water s recounte d tw o month s

150 The

Silver Cord

later, sh e offere d a n exampl e o f ho w he r los s o f connectio n t o th e im mediate situatio n turne d ou t badl y whe n sh e cam e hom e lat e t o find Sarah goin g t o be d twent y minute s lat e an d scolde d he r fo r it . But Sara h had bee n singin g wit h he r uncl e an d grandmother , s o her latenes s ha d a good excuse . Van Water s too k fo r grante d tha t "al l I have to d o to hav e an efficien t househol d an d a loya l an d happ y staf f i s t o disciplin e m y own day , contro l m y ow n expenditures , direc t m y attention. " A s wit h Gladys Penrod , th e interio r worl d o f emotio n an d th e externa l worl d o f others shoul d ben d t o th e full y discipline d will. 68 Although Va n Waters' s philosoph y o f chil d rearin g an d persona l de velopment wer e mor e sophisticate d an d coheren t tha n Glady s Penrod's , both hel d simila r understanding s o f th e rol e o f th e mothe r i n cultivatin g personal development . Mother s shoul d becom e models o f correct behav ior an d als o wor k persistentl y t o suppor t goo d habits . Bot h wome n als o espoused unattainabl e ideal s fo r motherl y behavio r an d experience d a sense o f failur e whe n the y fel l shor t o f thei r ow n expectations . Ye t bot h found enormou s emotiona l gratificatio n fro m thei r relationship s wit h their children . Althoug h Glady s Penro d an d Miria m Va n Water s ha d sharply differen t educations , lifestyles, and career accomplishments, bot h women foun d motherhoo d nea r th e cente r o f thei r emotiona l lives . I n this respect , the y represen t th e emotiona l experience s o f virtuall y al l o f the mother s whos e diarie s an d letter s ar e include d i n thi s study . Just a s these wome n fashione d individua l compromise s t o integrat e th e era' s varied, an d ofte n conflicting , image s o f romanc e an d o f marriag e wit h their persona l experiences , they worked t o integrat e the culture's variou s theories an d model s o f motherhoo d wit h thei r experience s a s mothers . For many , thi s rol e define d thei r emotiona l live s for years , providing th e most intens e joy s a s wel l a s th e mos t significan t pain s the y woul d expe rience.

6

The Fountain

In 193 0 twenty-year-ol d Rut h Raymon d entere d a perio d o f emotiona l difficulty tha t woul d las t fo r ove r five years . He r sufferin g centere d around feeling s o f inadequac y an d anxiet y whic h surface d i n relatio n t o her colleg e work, first a t Mt . Holyok e an d late r a t Radcliffe . Afte r with drawing fro m colleg e Rut h continue d i n a downwar d spira l marke d b y increasing distress , inactivity , an d alcoho l use . Throug h he r perio d o f deepest depressio n Rut h considere d entertaine r Harr y Richma n t o be her one friend , eve n thoug h sh e neve r me t him , an d sh e foun d he r greates t consolation i n th e soun d o f hi s voice . O n on e particularl y ba d da y i n 1935 sh e wrote , " I go t drunk , I'v e bee n drun k eve r sinc e I go t home , I've los t myself , I'v e los t work , I'v e los t everything , an d playe d al l m y Harry Richma n victrol a records , whic h ar e real . I shall b e very vulga r i f I am eve r ashame d o f th e solac e thos e disk s have bee n t o me." 1 About thi s time , Ruth' s parent s sough t t o consol e he r an d possibl y cajole he r ou t o f wha t the y ma y hav e considere d self-destructiv e gloom , by purchasin g ticket s fo r a Harr y Richma n performance . Rut h sa w thi s as her salvatio n an d a s incentiv e t o hol d hersel f together . A week befor e the concer t sh e wrote , "Nex t Saturda y Harr y Richman . I didn't as k fo r help, afte r all , i n vain . . . . I f I a m ver y goo d an d ver y brav e an d don' t bang m y brain s ou t agains t to o man y walls , I ma y hav e Harr y Rich man." The concert lived up to her expectations: "The real magnificence — I fel t a s i f m y spiri t hadn' t ha d a squar e meal , a s i f I hadn't bee n happ y in my bones , sinc e las t Januar y whe n I las t hear d hi m sing. " On e da y shortly afte r th e concer t Rut h too k advantag e o f he r mother' s absenc e to pos t secretl y a lette r t o Harry . Hi s response , two month s later , pulle d 151

152 The

Fountain

her throug h anothe r perio d o f emotiona l crisis . Sh e wrot e i n he r diary , "Dear Harry , I knew you' d com e throug h again . Yo u d o dro p i n a t th e opportunist times , . . . now I flower , briefl y i t ma y be , int o happiness , because o f ' a humble , stupid , ordinar y letter. ' " Rut h copie d Harry' s letter int o he r diary , an d ove r th e year s woul d tak e seriousl y hi s closin g invitation: "Pleas e fee l fre e t o writ e t o m e a t an y time , becaus e I alway s enjoy hearin g fro m m y friends. " Rut h wrot e he r final lette r t o Harr y Richman nearl y fort y year s afte r he r first, jus t befor e hi s deat h i n 1972 . In i t sh e thanked hi m agai n fo r th e gif t o f hi s music. 2 Ruth's diar y entrie s sugges t that throug h th e music of Harry Richma n and hi s contemporarie s sh e foun d acces s t o he r interio r world . A t time s she chos e musi c t o reflec t he r mood . Durin g on e period o f lonelines s sh e indulged i n "th e deliciou s miser y o f playin g 'Moanin ' Low ' o n th e vie. " After copyin g th e word s fro m th e son g i n he r diary , Rut h wrote , "Al l of a sudde n I a m ver y lonely , wit h a specia l kin d o f lonelines s fo r a ma n who would sa y 'I f I die where'll sh e be?' " Late r the same year sh e wrote, "One o f my bad days . Played ballad s on the vie during all possible hours, much comforte d b y m y newes t gem , Women Down in Memphis, whic h has ver y fine qualitie s indeed. " Othe r kind s o f musi c too k Rut h beyon d her unhappiness . Th e song s Harr y Richma n san g a t hi s 193 5 concer t apparently allowe d Rut h t o experienc e vicariousl y th e liltin g pleasure of "Putting o n th e Ritz " an d th e defian t optimis m o f " I Lov e a Parade. " Fine performance s o f bot h th e blue s an d th e upbea t tune s stirre d Rut h and satisfie d he r emotionally. 3 Ruth's idiosyncrati c emotiona l styl e remaine d consisten t throughou t the decad e followin g he r hig h schoo l graduation . Nationa l events , in cluding th e Depression , ha d surprisingl y littl e impac t o n he r life . He r feelings o f hopelessnes s an d despai r seeme d unrelate d t o th e country' s economic crisis , whic h i n fac t sh e neve r mentione d i n he r diar y o f lat e 1929 o r earl y 1930 . Although sh e notice d an d wrot e abou t povert y an d organized charities , sh e experience d n o economi c stres s an d seeme d in convenienced, bu t no t deepl y affected , b y th e financial problem s o f others. 4 Although Rut h Raymond' s persona l crisi s o f th e earl y 1930 s ha s sources i n he r persona l development , i t als o show s a numbe r o f theme s that woul d hol d tru e fo r man y middle-clas s women . Th e Depressio n appears t o hav e ha d littl e effec t o n emotiona l culture , an d althoug h i t changed th e fortune s an d circumstance s o f middle-clas s families , i t ofte n appears t o hav e ha d littl e impact o n th e emotional experienc e o f middle -

The Fountain 15

3

class women. Feeling s o f depressio n an d dejectio n becom e very commo n among wome n a s the y approache d thei r middl e years . Wome n wh o fit well int o th e emotiona l cultur e o f th e time , as we have seen , often foun d their hope s fo r romanc e o r companionshi p i n marriag e disappointed . Their counterpart s wh o neve r foun d romanc e o r marriag e ma y hav e faced lonelines s unbroke n b y th e supportiv e networ k o f femal e friend s and relation s o n whic h a n earlie r generatio n o f America n wome n relied . The economi c crisi s tha t settle d o n th e countr y i n 192 9 an d 193 0 forced itsel f int o th e awarenes s o f middle-clas s women . Photographe r Margaret Bourke-Whit e learne d o f th e stoc k marke t cras h fro m th e bankers wh o kep t crossin g i n fron t o f he r camer a durin g a nigh t shoo t of a ban k lobb y fo r th e nascen t Fortune magazine . Fortune's publisher s considered closin g dow n th e magazin e befor e it s first issue . Marth a La vell, just enterin g he r caree r a s a social worker i n Chicag o a s the Depression began , note d a t th e beginnin g o f 193 1 tha t th e Unite d Charitie s received on e hundre d ne w case s ever y day . Sh e considere d communis m a possibl e solution . "Anythin g i s bette r tha n a n economi c syste m base d on gree d an d disregar d o f huma n life. " "I t seem s tha t th e botto m ha s fallen ou t o f th e world, " wrot e lon e Robinso n earl y i n th e Depression . "As I vie w th e economi c chaos, " wrot e Viol a White , " I bles s m y star s that I have n o chil d t o worr y about." 5 The experienc e o f th e Depressio n coul d var y greatly , dependin g o n the regio n an d economi c clas s tha t a woma n calle d home . An n Mari e Low, growing u p in North Dakot a durin g the 1920s , considered farmin g an "everlastin g struggle. " Th e miserie s o f th e dus t bow l year s an d th e continued declin e o f cro p an d cattl e price s tha t force d he r famil y t o giv e up farmin g b y th e mid-thirtie s seeme d a par t o f th e chroni c depressio n that farmin g ha d entere d i n the early 1920s . In a college course on "rura l sociology" i n 193 3 Low' s instructo r "aske d ho w man y o f u s expec t t o spend ou r live s in rura l areas . I was th e onl y one." 6 Harriet Louis e Hardy , fro m a comfortabl e middle-clas s famil y an d about t o embar k o n a caree r i n medicine , coul d writ e briskl y i n 1933 , "The worl d i s ful l o f interes t thes e day s . . . each look s himsel f ove r se riously t o se e what h e ha s tha t ca n stan d th e shoc k o f thes e times. " Sh e managed t o stan d th e shoc k b y workin g summer s a t a girl' s cam p t o help pa y fo r medica l school , an d i n he r fourt h yea r sh e becam e doctor in-residence a t a Salvatio n Arm y hospita l fo r foundlings . He r pictur e o f the economic situation change d a s her parents suffered financial reverses . Her father' s air-conditionin g busines s wen t bankrupt , an d onl y he r

154 The

Fountain

mother's inheritanc e save d th e family' s furniture . He r mothe r an d fathe r were eventuall y force d t o ren t ou t thei r summe r hom e i n Vermon t a s a guest house , wit h fathe r workin g a s coo k an d mothe r a s housekeeper . Hardy sadl y reflected a year afte r he r earlie r statemen t tha t "i t is difficul t to realiz e th e economi c worl d i s nea r disaste r again ; tha t th e ridiculou s tempo o f ou r time s is about t o throw u s off th e track t o chaos & change ; that dramati c problem s ar e torturin g men' s live s an d peac e a s neve r before—it ha s eve n reache d m y home." 7 For some , the 1930 s offere d littl e anxiety . Doroth y Dushki n wrot e i n 1932 tha t th e musi c schoo l sh e ran wit h he r husban d continue d t o pros per "i n spit e o f har d time s al l abou t us. " Si x month s late r sh e reflecte d on he r famil y an d th e schoo l an d considere d i t " a ver y ful l & excitin g life w e lea d & I' m luck y t o b e a par t o f it. " Bet h Twiggar , wh o bega n college i n 1931 , wrot e virtuall y nothin g abou t th e Depressio n i n he r diary. I n a n annotatio n writte n i n 1992 , she wrote tha t sh e was shocke d that he r "ow n emotiona l circu s too k precedence " ove r th e economi c crisis. She recognized a t the time that variou s friend s face d problem s an d she learne d o f suffering fro m "newspaper s an d fro m trai n windows , i n my debatin g grou p an d Sociolog y classes. " Sh e als o recalle d tha t eve n though he r parents , throug h stringen t econom y an d har d work , pro tected he r fro m th e losse s o f th e Depression , sh e an d he r friend s mad e efforts t o ton e dow n thei r wardrobe s an d t o mak e d o wit h less . Sh e believed tha t he r father , wh o sa w hi s "lifetim e o f wor k an d prudenc e crumble away, " die d o f th e Depressio n i n 1938 , at ag e 68. 8 Although fro m th e retrospec t o f sixt y year s Bet h Twigga r Gof f coul d regret th e indifferenc e i n he r reflection s o n th e Depression , diarist s i n general too k not e o f th e economi c crisi s onl y a s it affecte d the m person ally. Diaries that deal t mainly with emotional experience treated nationa l economic trend s a s incidental . Eve n Marth a Lavell , whos e socia l wor k activities ha d take n he r int o th e home s o f thos e mos t affecte d b y th e Depression, wrot e i n 1933 , "Inerti a i s troublin g m e thes e days , fo r th e same ol d reasons—n o mal e companionshi p an d n o vocationa l success . The depressio n hasn' t bothere d m e hal f a s muc h a s thos e two." 9 Thi s may offe r th e mos t accurat e guid e t o th e impac t o f th e Depressio n o n emotionology i n th e 1930s . Wome n wh o cam e o f ag e i n th e 1920 s o r earlier ha d littl e caus e t o giv e u p thei r belie f i n romance , companionat e marriage, an d th e nee d fo r emotiona l management . Th e experienc e o f emotion a s well a s emotiona l cultur e ma y hav e shifte d fo r younge r mid dle-class wome n i n th e 1930s , althoug h her e th e trend s ar e ambiguou s

The Fountain 15

5

because o f th e abilit y o f man y middle-clas s households , lik e th e Twig gars, to maintai n som e modicu m o f thei r pre-Depressio n lifestyle . A t th e same time , trend s tha t ha d begu n i n th e 1920 s apparentl y continue d t o shape emotiona l experienc e i n the 1930s . Adolescent convivialit y seems , o n balance , t o hav e change d les s a s a result o f th e Depressio n tha n becaus e o f th e continue d sprea d o f th e adolescent pee r culture . Dating , o f course , require d participatio n i n th e consumer cultur e an d thi s suffered wit h th e household stringencie s of the 1930s. B y th e mid-i930 s familie s spen t proportionatel y les s o n adoles cents tha n the y ha d a decad e before . Th e manage r o f on e movi e hous e in Muncie , Indiana , reporte d i n 193 5 tha t movie s " 'hav e bee n hi t jus t like jewelr y an d othe r luxur y trades. ' " Th e researcher s wh o ha d re turned t o Munci e t o stud y th e impac t o f th e Depression , however , tended t o discoun t th e manager' s tal k o f wo e an d reporte d tha t movie s held th e "sam e larg e plac e i n Middletown' s leisur e toda y tha t the y di d in 1925. " As they ha d a decad e earlier , movie s gav e adolescent s a com mon vocabular y an d a se t o f standard s fo r behavior . "Joa n Crawfor d has he r amateu r counterpart s i n th e high-schoo l girl s wh o strol l wit h brittle confidenc e i n an d ou t o f 'Barney's ' soft-drin k parlor , 'clicking ' with th e 'drugstor e cowboys ' a t th e tables." 10 Dating an d othe r emotiona l ritual s o f the youth cultur e probably con tinued t o gro w i n acceptanc e wit h th e growth i n high schoo l attendance . The Depressio n undermine d incentive s fo r youn g peopl e t o qui t school . Even amon g familie s receivin g relief i n 1935-36 , 58. 5 percent o f sixteen to seventeen-year-old s attende d school , with th e percentag e growin g fo r every highe r incom e grou p (almos t 7 5 percen t fo r familie s wit h incom e of $1,00 0 t o $1,90 0 pe r year) . An n Mari e Low , i n th e depresse d far m belt, attende d schoo l dance s an d wen t t o movie s throughou t th e har d times o f th e lat e 1920 s an d earl y 1930s. 11 With th e expansio n o f adolescen t heterosocialit y wen t a continue d though slo w declin e o f homosociality . Althoug h n o stud y o f youn g women's sexualit y a s extensive a s Katherine Bemen t Davis's came ou t of the Depressio n years , the socia l scienc e literatur e o f th e perio d shape d a consensus o n adolescen t homoeroticis m tha t sa w a homosexua l stag e a s a norma l phas e i n developmen t a s lon g a s i t foun d expressio n onl y i n idealized crushes. 12 On e stud y fro m th e lat e 1930 s reporte d tha t homo sexuals mad e u p onl y a smal l portio n o f colleg e wome n an d tha t th e commonplace passionat e romance s amon g wome n o f a n earlie r er a ha d largely passe d fro m th e scen e a t colleges. 13

156 The

Fountain

Marriage probabl y fel t th e impac t o f th e Depressio n mor e directl y than courtship . Leonar d Rosenfel d propose d t o Adel e Siege l o n Apri l 6 , 1936. Sh e agreed, bu t onl y o n th e conditio n tha t the y wait unti l circum stances woul d allow . Thi s mean t delayin g thei r weddin g unti l Apri l 1 , 1939. Th e Lynd s recognize d th e reluctanc e t o marr y a s a genera l tren d in Muncie , althoug h on e tha t bottome d ou t b y 1933 . The marriag e rat e of 193 5 n a < i returne d t o th e rat e fo r th e las t hal f o f th e 1920s . The los s of asset s undoubtedl y create d strain s i n marriage s throughou t th e de cade. Th e Lynd s eve n speculate d tha t th e Depressio n ma y hav e brough t wide-ranging emotiona l change s t o me n an d women , a s th e rol e o f breadwinner wa s los t t o man y me n an d take n u p b y som e women. Out wardly, however , ther e appeare d littl e change i n gender role s in the mid 19308. "Th e me n wer e preoccupie d wit h rebuildin g th e shake n fence s o f their jo b world , an d th e wome n wer e doin g th e familia r women' s wor k of keepin g house , rearin g children , an d goin g t o clubs , with a modicu m of church , charity , o r civi c work." 14 The Lynds' s genera l descriptio n woul d hav e serve d wel l for th e life of Dorothy Blake whose publishe d diar y detaile d a year o f he r lif e o n Lon g Island durin g th e Depression . Blake' s husban d ha d continue d t o work , although wit h a lowe r salary , an d th e famil y struggle d t o kee p u p hous e payments an d maintai n thei r middle-clas s lifestyl e wit h les s income. On e of th e theme s tha t Blak e returne d t o severa l time s i n he r diar y wa s tha t the Depressio n offere d som e residua l benefits , amon g the m th e "intens e mutual need " tha t sh e experience d wit h he r husband : "al l th e time , ou r family gettin g close r an d close r i n understandin g an d lov e an d partner ship." Fo r Blake , the Depressio n offere d th e opportunit y fo r th e realiza tion o f th e emotiona l goal s o f companionat e marriage. 15 The economi c crisi s supported companionat e marriag e i n other ways . During th e Depressio n year s mos t America n me n believe d tha t wive s should no t wor k i f their husband s wer e abl e t o suppor t them . Thi s con sensus entere d int o hirin g decisions . Fro m 193 0 t o 1940 , wome n em ployed i n th e profession s fel l fro m 14. 2 t o 12. 3 percen t o f th e total . Viola Whit e note d tha t th e youn g me n wh o ha d finished thei r Ph.D. s with he r "ar e assure d o f job s fo r nex t year , whil e I hav e n o ghos t o f anything." Whit e eventuall y foun d wor k a s th e libraria n o f Middlebur y College. Glady s Bel l Penro d looke d fo r wor k durin g th e earl y 1930s . Although sh e had ambivalen t feeling s abou t teachin g again, she felt com pelled t o hel p mov e th e famil y ou t o f th e tigh t financial conditio n i t wa s in. Sh e neve r foun d full-tim e work . On e schoo l boar d director , a n ol d

The Fountain 15

7

family friend , wrot e he r a letter i n response t o Gladys' s lette r o f inquir y that reflecte d th e policies o f many schoo l districts . "I t is the intention of the Boar d t o no t emplo y an y marrie d teache r whos e husban d i s work ing." 16 Gladys Penrod' s anxiet y ove r he r family' s finances provide s a n illus tration o f ways tha t th e Depression shape d emotiona l experienc e eve n if it made littl e change in emotional culture . Similarly, Miriam Van Waters worried tha t th e Framingha m Reformator y "canno t operat e unde r th e present budget , an d I am assured ther e wil l b e no increase. I cannot liv e on m y salary— I spen d mos t o f i t o n [institutional ] expense s an d hav e reduced m y standar d o f living." 17 Bu t even thoug h ther e ar e some clea r effects o f the Depression o n individuals, it becomes very difficult t o identify way s tha t th e Depression shape d th e emotional live s o f women. We have onl y a handfu l o f diarie s tha t bega n i n th e 1920 s an d continue d through th e 1930s . Thes e generall y com e fro m th e mos t persisten t dia rists, wome n lik e Glady s Bel l Penrod , Bet h Twigga r Goff , Rut h Ray mond, an d Winifre d Willis , whos e rumination s becam e permanen t fea tures o f thei r whol e lives . A s w e pointe d ou t i n th e previou s chapter , diary-keeping droppe d of f sharpl y amon g women wh o had children, and this applie s mor e generall y t o wome n a s the y move d beyon d th e earl y stages o f marriage o r career. B y the time they reached thei r thirties , most women seeme d t o lose interest i n writing abou t thei r lives . The smal l numbe r o f diarie s tha t g o on throug h th e entire adul t live s of wome n offer s th e possibility o f deepe r analysi s an d suggest s tha t ma ture adulthoo d presente d wome n wit h anxiety , depression , an d eve n health problems , and that thi s held tru e i n spite of the personal styl e and outlook o f individua l women . Winifre d Willis , fo r instance , sa w herself as constitutionall y melancholy , eve n durin g he r earl y twenties . Th e breakdown o f her marriage followe d b y nervous collaps e seemingl y con solidated thi s personal typing . Willis began to study the writings of Schopenhauer aroun d th e time o f her nervous breakdown , an d reflections o n Schopenhauer woul d reappea r i n he r journa l fo r year s t o come . Fro m 1928 he r journa l include d fewe r record s o f dail y event s an d mor e re sponses t o th e writing s o f others , snatche s fro m he r memory , an d self reflection o n pas t events . Harrie t Louis e Hardy , o n th e othe r hand , whose healthy-mindednes s carrie d he r through th e sadness of unrequite d love and would for m a permanent featur e o f her approach t o a challenging career , nevertheles s suffere d fro m th e stresses o f her work a t North field Seminar y combine d wit h privat e practice . Althoug h he r autobiog -

158 The

Fountain

raphy doe s not mentio n he r secre t sorro w ove r losin g "R, " thi s may als o have contribute d t o wha t sh e calle d a nervou s breakdow n tha t laste d from 193 8 int o 1939. 18 Miriam Va n Waters seem s to hav e maintaine d a distinctive emotiona l style throughou t he r adul t life . A recen t biographe r ha s pointe d t o Va n Waters's effort s t o provid e th e motherin g tha t sh e misse d durin g th e prolonged absence s o f he r ow n mother . Va n Water s woul d becom e a reformatory superintendent , juvenil e judge , an d eve n a n adoptiv e mother, al l role s tha t allowe d he r t o offe r a n idealize d nurtur e t o he r charges an d t o he r daughter . Ye t the sens e that Va n Waters carrie d fro m childhood o f neve r quit e givin g o r doin g enoug h als o persisted . I n spit e of a full an d successfu l career , Van Waters's diar y reflect s o n her failure s to properl y car e fo r he r adopte d daughte r Sara h o r t o dea l wit h staf f i n just th e righ t way . Sh e ofte n slep t poorl y an d man y entrie s reflecte d he r desire to find som e standar d o f mora l livin g that woul d allo w her to find calm an d confidenc e withi n herself. 19 Beth Twigga r deal t wit h th e problem s o f matur e adulthoo d i n way s that seeme d t o matc h cultura l prescription s ye t clearl y ben t th e culture' s norms t o he r ow n needs . Although sh e lost much o f the ebullience of he r adolescent year s afte r a broke n engagemen t t o a Wes t Poin t cadet , sh e continued t o hop e fo r lov e and a full life . She found work , live d throug h a shor t an d unsatisfactor y marriage , an d finally fel l i n love with th e ma n she woul d b e marrie d t o fo r te n year s unti l hi s accidenta l death . Eve n if Beth Twiggar' s lif e improved , he r earl y adul t year s stil l gav e he r a ful l measure o f questioning , anxiety , an d feeling s o f incompleteness. In terms of th e shap e o f he r emotiona l life , th e Depressio n appear s t o hav e mad e little difference . Th e sam e ca n b e sai d fo r al l o f th e persisten t diarists. 20 Persistent diarists , o f course , ma y b e mor e introspective , mor e sensi tive t o th e nuanc e o f thei r emotiona l live s tha n th e grea t majorit y o f people. Ye t the y d o no t appea r t o hav e differe d i n an y othe r significan t way fro m othe r middle-clas s women . Th e mor e casua l diarist s i n ou r study, wh o kep t diarie s fo r on e o r onl y a fe w years , almos t alway s turned t o reflection s o n thei r emotiona l lives . Edythe Weiner's year-lon g diary a t ag e fourtee n cover s man y o f th e sam e theme s tha t Bet h Twig gar's diar y di d fo r tha t par t o f he r life , althoug h Twigga r wrot e longe r entries. Som e psychologica l literatur e suggest s tha t wome n dea l wit h problems o f relationshi p o r othe r stresse s o f lif e mor e commonl y b y talking an d ponderin g emotion s tha n me n do . I f so , the n th e persisten t

The Fountain 15

9

diarists differe d fro m othe r wome n onl y i n thei r faithfulnes s t o th e writ ten record . If ou r diarist s ca n serv e a s a guide t o large r trends , then thi s points t o important theme s i n the live s of matur e women . Th e diarist s foun d thei r emotional live s incomplet e o r unsatisfactor y fa r mor e frequentl y tha n they experienced optimis m an d satisfaction . Clinica l evidence is also suggestive. Whereas men hav e personality disorder s and othe r mental healt h problems a t a highe r rat e tha n women , fro m a t leas t 193 6 wome n hav e outnumbered me n i n case s o f clinica l depressio n b y tw o t o one . Recen t psychological researc h ha s confirme d th e prevalenc e o f wome n wh o ar e both clinicall y an d subclinicall y depressed . Durin g th e 1930 s th e ter m dejection woul d typicall y hav e bee n applie d t o individual s wit h wha t w e now cal l mild depression , an d th e "discourage d o r dispirite d mood" tha t defines dejectio n certainl y applie s t o man y o f th e persisten t diarist s a t some periods . However, al l o f th e wome n wh o sense d incompletenes s i n their emotiona l live s als o felt , fro m tim e t o time , the hopelessness , inad equacy, o r unworthines s tha t psychologist s i n th e 1930 s woul d hav e used t o defin e pathologica l depression. 21 A tentativ e conclusio n tha t w e ma y dra w fro m thes e trend s i s tha t mature, middle-clas s wome n frequentl y foun d thei r emotiona l live s in adequate. Rathe r tha n th e feeling s o f happines s promise d i n advertise ments, o r th e sens e o f fullnes s an d completenes s offere d b y contempo rary therapeuti c strategies , middle-class wome n ofte n fel l int o period s of self-doubt an d self-blame . The y misse d something , whethe r i t wa s ro mance o r intensit y o r inne r calm . Independenc e an d caree r coul d leav e women feelin g the y had faile d i n some important respects . Martha Lavel l mourned th e los s o f he r drea m fo r a husban d an d children . " I don' t know wha t I'l l d o wit h m y lif e i f I don' t marry, " sh e wrot e i n 193 2 a s she bega n he r caree r i n socia l wor k an d research . Thre e year s late r sh e still longe d fo r marriage : "it' s al l I want ou t o f life , an d a s th e year s g o by, m y yout h an d vitalit y an d potentialitie s fo r comradeshi p ar e bein g wasted." 22 Wealt h seem s t o hav e mad e n o difference . Ann e Morro w Lindbergh coul d neve r ri d hersel f o f feeling s o f doub t abou t he r lif e an d adequacy, eve n afte r sh e marrie d Charle s Lindberg h i n th e lat e 1920s . Even though Lindberg h expresse d hersel f mor e fluently tha n Glady s Penrod, who marrie d a truck driver , the two women face d man y o f the sam e self-doubts. The growin g cultura l preferenc e fo r heterosexua l an d heterosocia l re -

160 The

Fountain

lationships probabl y contribute d mor e t o th e generalize d dissatisfactio n of matur e wome n tha n th e Depression . Twentieth-centur y wome n wer e less likel y tha n wome n a centur y o r fift y year s previousl y t o fac e th e death o f a child o r husban d (a t least unti l ol d age) , and the y suffere d les s from childbirt h o r disease . Ye t the y wer e fa r mor e likel y t o los e a hus band throug h divorce , an d an y grie f o r difficult y the y encountere d a s they mature d the y ha d t o fac e withou t th e solac e o f passionat e friend ships o r th e supportiv e networ k o f friend s o n whic h Victoria n wome n relied. Organize d feminis m continue d throug h th e 1920s , bu t th e num ber o f wome n involve d i n feminis t cause s droppe d sharply . Th e stron g relationships amon g adul t wome n tha t ha d characterize d man y o f th e Progressive-era organizations—settlemen t houses , women's colleges , social reform groups—decline d a s the twentieth centur y continued . O f th e persistent diarist s i n thi s study , onl y Miria m Va n Water s seem s t o hav e maintained a stron g networ k o f supportiv e wome n friends . Younge r women joine d th e revol t agains t Victorianis m b y embracin g lif e amon g men. Psychologist Lorinn e Pruette claimed i n 193 0 that women ha d littl e interest i n feminis m becaus e the y believe d i t was "anti-man." 23 The lo w estimat e give n t o women' s passionat e attachment s t o othe r women mean t tha t man y wome n becam e wive s an d mother s o r matur e career women withou t th e intimacy an d suppor t o f other women. Glady s Penrod ha d depende d o n th e lovin g attentio n o f he r frien d Elsi e durin g her earl y twenties . Sh e received an d value d "al l kind s o f lov e an d confi dence fro m Elsie " befor e he r marriage . Bu t afte r he r marriag e Penro d rarely mentione d Elsie , an d whe n sh e di d sh e ofte n criticize d her . Viol a White los t al l self-respect i n her passion fo r a n olde r friend, Beatrice , but the passio n wen t largel y unrequited . "Th e woma n I love," sh e wrote i n 1931, "th e woma n wh o i s indispensabl e t o me , regard s m e wit h grati tude whe n I let her alone. " White's desir e for intimac y remaine d individ ual. Sh e neve r discovere d th e "community " tha t sh e idealize d an d tha t women o f a n earlie r generatio n migh t hav e foun d i n group s o f like minded women. 24 Family continued t o b e important fo r youn g women, an d th e relation s between daughter s an d mother s ma y hav e improve d onc e th e year s o f flaming yout h ha d passed . Bu t th e cultura l preferenc e fo r seein g th e mothering instinc t a s potentiall y dangerous , i f no t activel y pernicious , weakened th e tie s o f mother s an d daughters. 25 Mal e mentor s ma y hav e replaced olde r wome n friend s fo r som e women . Harrie t Louis e Hard y often mention s senio r medica l me n wh o helpe d an d encourage d her .

The Fountain 16

1

Male mentors , however , ma y hav e encourage d wome n t o devot e them selves mor e full y t o caree r tha n t o relationship s an d s o aggravate d th e isolation the y alread y experienced . Durin g he r firs t professiona l positio n at a girl's schoo l an d i n her privat e practice , Hardy relie d o n the suppor t of olde r mal e physicians an d a professor a t Cornel l Medical School . Th e girls a t th e schoo l chide d he r fo r bein g unmarrie d an d gav e he r thei r wishes fo r a happie r future. 26 Modern marriage , o f course , hel d ou t th e mos t attractiv e alternativ e to intimat e femal e friends . Th e companionshi p o f husban d an d wif e would becom e th e basi c relationshi p fo r women , th e on e aroun d whic h all othe r relationship s woul d turn . Ye t a s w e hav e seen , companionat e marriage promise d wome n tha t i t could fill their lives ; for men , marriag e continued t o b e only a part o f life . Doroth y Dushkin , fo r who m moder n marriage worke d ver y well , nevertheles s continue d t o searc h fo r an d prize he r clos e wome n friends . Childre n consume d muc h o f Dorothy' s time an d thoughts . He r husband , David , wh o worke d a t home , illus trated th e relatio n o f mos t husband s t o th e hom e b y poppin g i n o n th e family severa l time s durin g th e day . Mos t o f hi s tim e h e gav e t o hi s teaching an d t o plannin g fo r thei r school. 27 It wa s no t a matte r tha t wome n los t al l contac t wit h othe r women . They attended P.T.A . meetings and played bridg e with friends. However , they rarel y agai n experience d th e clos e an d ofte n passionat e bond s tha t many o f the m ha d enjoye d a s adolescents . I f the y married , the y investe d their entir e emotiona l capita l i n husband an d family . Thi s ofte n faile d t o pay th e dividend s tha t America n cultur e assure d the m i t would . Th e relative isolatio n tha t wome n experience d a s the y establishe d familie s and career s help s explai n feeling s o f self-doub t an d mil d depressio n tha t appear s o frequently i n their diaries . The los s of supportiv e relationship s also point s towar d th e emotiona l strategie s tha t wome n adopte d i n adulthood. Rathe r tha n relyin g o n th e hel p o f othe r wome n an d derivin g emotional satisfaction s fro m clos e friends, wome n looke d inwar d fo r th e resources t o mee t th e crise s o f maturity . A surprisin g numbe r o f ou r diarist s foun d encouragemen t an d hop e from readin g The Fountain, a nove l b y Britis h autho r Charle s Morga n that appeare d i n 1932 . Th e emotiona l challenge s tha t wome n face d i n adulthood coincidin g wit h th e persona l stres s tha t man y fel t a s a resul t of th e Depressio n hel p t o explai n th e popularit y o f Morgan' s work . I t is the stor y o f Lewi s Alison , a Britis h soldie r interne d i n Hollan d a t th e beginning o f Worl d Wa r I , an d o f Juli e vo n Narwitz , a youn g woma n

162 The

Fountain

Lewis ha d tutore d man y year s before . The y mee t agai n whe n Lewi s i s released fro m a priso n fortres s int o th e keepin g o f Julie' s stepfather , Baron va n Leyden . Juli e i s marrie d t o a Germa n officer , an d bot h sh e and Lewi s a t first ignor e an d the n struggl e agains t thei r growin g passio n for on e another. 28 The Fountain becam e a bestselle r o n bot h side s o f th e Atlanti c an d received fulsom e prais e fro m critics . The New York Times reviewe r de scribed i t a s "literat e a s wel l a s literary . . . . a nove l o f s o delicat e a flavor" tha t i t coul d no t b e easil y summarized . I n th e Saturday Review of Literature, reviewe r an d popula r autho r Hendri k Wille m Va n Loo n called The Fountain " a ver y civilize d boo k . . . a n interestin g stor y inter estingly told. " I t i s temptin g t o rea d gende r int o Va n Loon' s review , which deal s mainl y wit h th e captivit y o f th e Britis h soldier s i n a n ol d fortress, a phase o f th e stor y tha t take s u p onl y a fe w chapters . The lov e story betwee n Juli e an d Lewis , whic h take s shap e ove r hundred s o f pages, Van Loo n refer s t o in one sentence. Even more central to the stor y are Lewis' s reflection s o n a lif e o f detachmen t an d spiritua l peace , o f which Va n Loo n make s n o mentio n a t all . Emil y Newel l Blair , writin g for Good Housekeeping, deal t no t onl y wit h th e spiritua l significanc e o f the lov e stor y bu t als o wit h th e possibilit y o f huma n transcendenc e tha t the boo k presents . In he r first sentence s sh e conveyed th e "dee p spiritua l experience" create d b y the book . "A s I read it , there cam e t o m e a sens e of detachmen t fro m th e world abou t me . Again an d agai n I found mysel f . . . drifting int o utter stillness . It gave me not onl y a quiet desire to evok e this stillness , but mysticall y enable d m e to d o it." 29 Blair's revie w pointe d directl y t o th e valu e tha t man y wome n foun d in Morgan' s book . Ann e Morro w Lindberg h rea d The Fountain i n th e weeks following he r son's kidnaping an d murder. "Thi s is what I want— here" sh e wrote. "Thi s ma n knows! " Sh e went o n t o quot e a passage i n which Morga n ha d describe d "stillin g th e soul " wit h th e mind . Month s later Lindberg h woul d agai n retur n i n her reflection s t o a passage i n The Fountain wher e Morga n ha d contraste d peopl e wh o trie d t o los e them selves i n a caus e o r pleasur e o r excitemen t wit h th e saint s wh o coul d retreat t o island s o f inne r calm. 30 Winifred Willi s also read The Fountain a t a time of personal trial , just after th e breaku p o f he r marriag e an d he r ow n recover y fro m nervou s distress. Sh e wrot e thre e year s afte r th e event : " I wil l neve r forge t tha t day i n th e summe r o f 193 2 whe n I first read 'Th e Fountain. ' " I n a ne w marriage an d determine d t o mak e hersel f over , sh e fel t th e wor k "jolte d

The Fountain 16

3

me righ t bac k t o earth . I t gav e mysel f t o me , i t gav e m e th e worl d i n a mingling o f spiritua l an d earth y tha t defie s description. " Willis wanted a path towar d spiritua l self-reliance . A n entr y tha t recorde d he r reading of the boo k reflecte d tha t "th e desir e t o b e invulnerable i s flawless." 31 Lik e Anne Morro w Lindbergh , sh e sough t a cal m withi n hersel f tha t woul d save her fro m th e ravage s o f he r emotions . Harriet Louis e Hard y approache d lif e mor e optimisticall y tha n Lind bergh o r Lockhart , an d religio n playe d a fa r large r rol e i n he r lif e tha n it di d fo r eithe r Lindberg h o r Lockhar t i n thei r earl y adul t years . Ye t Hardy als o fel t draw n t o Morgan' s descriptio n o f " 'th e peac e whic h i s invulnerable. . . . ' I know I must becom e invulnerable," Hardy reflected , "and I a m impregnabl e i n proportio n t o th e degre e t o whic h I develo p my inne r life." 32 Martha Lavel l foun d th e boo k "puzzlin g i n man y ways . I t concerne d the contemplativ e life , an d quietnes s o f sou l a s a goa l i n life . T o b e beyond earthl y things , pai n an d jealous y an d ambitions , wa s th e ai m o f two o f th e characters. " He r pacifis m an d he r caree r a s a socia l worke r colored he r view s o f th e book . S o did he r attractio n t o Norma n Thoma s and socialism . "The y wer e fine men, " sh e wrot e o f th e characters . "Bu t their philosoph y seeme d t o m e t o b e a rathe r egocentri c one . The y seemed t o sho w n o interes t i n socia l problems , i n th e questio n o f evil . . . . Though the y live d throug h th e war , the y gav e n o though t t o it s significance o r t o th e suffering i t caused." Alon e amon g th e diarist s wh o commented o n th e work , Lavel l dismisse d th e goa l o f inne r peac e a s "rather a narrow goal." 33 Yet Lavell was als o alon e amon g thes e diarist s in no t sufferin g a crisi s i n he r persona l lif e durin g th e earl y 1930s . Sh e looked o n th e Depressio n a s th e grea t proble m o f th e da y an d believe d the work o f th e individua l necessaril y shoul d tur n t o socia l goals . Although no t ever y woman wh o wrot e a diar y rea d The Fountain (o r wrote abou t i t i f the y did) , th e desir e fo r a n interio r cal m turn s u p re peatedly i n th e reflection s o f th e diarists . W e hav e alread y see n tha t Miriam Va n Waters strive d to achiev e vital conduct, which sh e described as a natura l powe r tha t individual s ca n ta p withi n themselves . Doroth y Dushkin, who i n the early thirties believe d that sh e could calm her "emo tional waywardness " b y allowin g hersel f t o becom e absorbe d i n wor k and i n th e intensit y o f th e moment , wrot e a year late r tha t sh e hoped t o achieve a more meditativ e life , not givin g hersel f u p to mechanica l tasks , petty conversations , gossip , o r "mundan e trivialities. " Glady s Bel l Pen rod, wh o trie d t o manag e awa y he r emotiona l distress , expresse d he r

6.i Marth a Lavel l a t Mill s Colleg e i n 1926 . Phot o b y [Webster?] . Sophi a Smith Collection , Smit h College .

The Fountain 16

5

desire i n term s tha t migh t hav e suite d Morgan . "I f ther e wa s a plac e where on e coul d escap e fro m thinking , I would b e there now." 34 Ruth Raymon d als o rea d The Fountain, perhap s a s earl y a s Novem ber 1932 , an d use d a passag e fro m i t a s th e inscriptio n fo r on e o f th e volumes o f he r diary . I n th e passag e Lewi s Aliso n reflecte d tha t individ uals "di e t o th e instant " a s tim e passes . Pas t selve s becom e "strang e ghosts . . . with who m the y hav e n o communication." 35 Althoug h suc h a passage coul d hav e serve d a s a commentar y o n th e projec t o f diary keeping, Raymon d offere d n o reflection s o n Morgan' s boo k an d s o of fers n o hel p t o psychologist s o r historians . Th e contex t provide d b y Raymond's diarie s make s i t clea r tha t Rut h Raymon d als o wante d t o find a plac e o f repos e a s a respit e o r escap e fro m th e wearyin g realitie s she faced. Fo r Raymond , however , th e attemp t t o mak e a personal spac e meant drawin g o n a wid e variet y o f material s fro m he r culture , includ ing, as the openin g paragraph s o f this chapter demonstrate , popular mu sic. Sh e deal t wit h he r lonelines s an d persona l pai n i n he r diary , wher e she create d a n alternativ e worl d o f virtua l relationship s t o replac e th e real friendships an d lov e relationships tha t elude d her. Even though Rut h Raymond wa s apparentl y mor e trouble d tha n ou r othe r persisten t dia rists, sh e share d wit h man y o f th e other s a sens e o f dissatisfactio n o r incompleteness. He r writing s als o underlin e th e pervasivenes s an d im portance o f popula r cultur e i n th e emotiona l live s of youn g women . Born i n 1909 , Ruth Raymon d live d mos t o f he r lif e nea r Boston . He r father taugh t paleontolog y a t Harvard , an d Rut h attende d Mt . Holyok e College an d late r Radcliff e College . Sh e wante d t o write , an d sh e com pleted tw o novel s whic h wer e neve r published . Ruth' s precolleg e entrie s are energeti c an d feisty . "Rea d a t you r ow n risk, " sh e defiantl y com manded th e curiou s wh o migh t loo k int o he r diary . Ye t eve n a s a teen aged hig h schoo l student , Rut h relie d mor e o n fantas y relationship s tha n real one s fo r emotiona l gratification . Sh e participated onl y tentativel y i n the yout h culture . Sh e wen t o n mos t outing s wit h he r fathe r o r mothe r and spen t muc h o f he r tim e alone , writin g shor t stories , novels , an d lengthy diar y entries . One o f th e fe w hig h schoo l romance s sh e mention s took plac e mainly i n her imagination . Sh e wrote frequently abou t David , with who m sh e suggest s sh e ha d som e kin d o f understanding . Afte r h e became intereste d i n anothe r girl , sh e magnifie d eve n he r slightes t en counters wit h him , investin g the m wit h emotiona l meaning s an d depth . She eve n claime d tha t h e wa s afrai d he r attractio n wa s to o strong , an d

166 The

Fountain

that wa s wh y h e sa t wit h hi s bac k t o he r wit h anothe r girl' s initial s scrawled o n hi s desk. 36 Ruth's friendship s wit h youn g women , althoug h i n som e case s sus tained ove r man y years , typicall y di d no t includ e eithe r share d confi dences o r frequen t socializing . Ann a Napoli , Ruth' s on e clos e hig h school friend , marrie d shortl y afte r graduation , an d Ruth' s contac t wit h her wa s limite d thereafte r t o occasiona l visit s at Anna's home . At college Ruth faile d t o wi n emotiona l intimac y fro m othe r youn g women , al though sh e did make severa l friends an d develope d a crush o n one youn g woman. Shortl y afte r arrivin g a t Mt . Holyok e i n 192 8 sh e wrot e abou t a "sli m girl , blac k hai r cu t boyish " w Tith "taperin g brow n fac e dustil y vivid a t th e cheekbone , lon g ligh t eye s aslant ; aquilin e nose ; mouth red , triangular an d sullen. " Sh e obviousl y admire d thi s girl , an d als o feare d her a little bit , nicknamin g he r "Hell-Hath-No-Fury-Like. " Eve n thoug h she referre d t o thi s pee r a s "m y mistress, " Ruth' s encounter s wit h he r remained tentative : "One nigh t I spoke to her on the stair, but she merely looked baleful." 37 Sh e als o wrot e o f dancin g wit h a differen t gir l a t a college socia l an d looke d forwar d t o he r sophomor e yea r wit h ye t an other girl . Non e o f thes e relationship s seem s t o hav e bee n ver y strong , however, an d non e lasted afte r Rut h lef t Mt . Holyoke i n 1929 . Although Ruth Raymon d continue d t o mentio n femal e friends , non e o f the m ex cept Ann a seeme d t o hav e bee n ver y intimat e wit h her . During he r colleg e years , Rut h als o dreame d o f romance . " I kno w now wha t i t i s colleg e doesn' t giv e tha t I want. . . . Love. I have t o lov e somebody o r somethin g t o b e happy. Love. " Sh e accurately reflecte d th e culture's prescriptio n fo r fulfillmen t an d hel d o n t o it . A t th e en d o f 1928, sh e wished "t o mee t someon e wh o wil l love me and who m I'l l fal l in lov e wit h thi s nex t year. " Late r sh e seem s t o hav e shifte d awa y fro m a romanti c pictur e o f her love , desiring instea d "t o b e loved a s is—love d with al l my sins on my head." Sh e pictured a companionate ideal—"tw o people puttin g thei r fee t o n th e tabl e an d sayin g 'Hell ' an d grinnin g a t their privat e joke. " Yet Ruth remaine d sociall y isolated. Sh e participated in events that di d not present the possibility of forming persona l relation ships. To her mother's dismay , Ruth onc e chose to attend a local footbal l game rathe r tha n hav e a part y fo r a youn g ma n wh o ha d expresse d a n interest i n her. 38 Her lac k o f an y intimate relationshi p thre w Ruth Raymon d bac k ont o her ow n resources—he r reading , he r diary , her hope s fo r th e future. Sh e

The Fountain 1

6j

left Radcliff e i n the sprin g o f 193 0 afte r on e year o f stud y an d the n live d at home , attendin g tow n sportin g event s an d hig h schoo l alumn i meet ings. Sh e pursued he r drea m o f writing , ye t he r wor k remaine d unpubli shed, frustratin g he r hope s fo r a literar y career . Th e year s o f th e Grea t Depression turne d int o year s o f persona l depressio n fo r Ruth . "No w today I a m hal f craz y wit h depression, " sh e wrot e i n earl y 1930 . "On e of m y ba d days, " she wrote a fe w month s later. 39 Ruth's ba d day s increase d i n frequenc y throughou t th e earl y 1930s . In 193 5 sh e pinne d he r hope s fo r emotiona l well-bein g o n a tri p t o England an d Scotlan d wher e sh e planned t o conduct researc h fo r a boo k on th e Duk e o f Perth . Althoug h sh e mad e th e trip , Ruth' s hope s wen t unfulfilled. Whil e i n Grea t Britai n sh e suffere d severa l illnesse s an d a number o f disappointments . Sh e returned hom e month s ahea d o f sched ule, "mercilessl y ill , Culloden o f m y spirit , broken , lost." 40 Within week s o f he r retur n hom e Rut h foun d hersel f hospitalize d a t Massachusetts Genera l Hospita l wher e sh e learne d afte r "thre e day s i n the hospita l an d al l manne r o f tests " tha t sh e wa s "merel y sufferin g th e punishment o f havin g n o youn g friend s o r ne w moon. " Th e diar y con text o f thi s somewha t crypti c remar k show s tha t Rut h understoo d he r problem a s lac k o f romance . Fo r treatmen t Rut h wa s referre d t o a psy choanalyst, Dr . Bauer , who m sh e describe d a s "everythin g tha t i s goo d and kind , th o h e doe s ten d t o dismis s Pert h an d th e boo k an d geniu s a s so man y symptom s o f frustration. " Rut h secure d a promis e fro m he r parents t o sen d he r bac k t o Scotlan d th e followin g spring , bu t agree d i n exchange t o fulfil l th e obligation s o f he r gende r an d station : "Mean while, I am t o hav e m y 'comin g out, ' see k th e jo y I should hav e ha d te n years ago. " Ruth rarel y mentione d he r psychoanalyti c treatmen t i n he r diary , ex cept t o wryl y denigrat e th e proces s fro m tim e t o time . Severa l week s after beginnin g treatmen t wit h Dr . Bauer , fo r example , sh e followe d a passage concernin g th e mora l characte r o f th e recentl y decease d acto r Jack Pickfor d b y notin g tha t he r analys t "woul d probabl y thin k I wa s furtively sinnin g i n imaginatio n wit h a dea d playboy. " Rut h no t onl y accused psychoanalysi s o f indecency , sh e attribute d t o i t som e responsi bility fo r he r ongoin g alcoho l abuse . Sh e characterize d th e wee k afte r her discharg e fro m th e hospita l a s "On e hopeles s blan k da y an d the n another, whe n I a m eithe r harasse d o r stupid ; harasse d whe n I think o f the liberatin g beautie s o f psychoanalysis , an d stupi d whe n I remedy th e

168 The

Fountain

situation." B y "remedy " sh e mean t consumin g enoug h brand y o r stou t to num b he r pai n an d allo w he r t o forge t th e insight s offere d b y psychoanalysis.41 Ruth sough t relie f fro m he r isolatio n an d feeling s o f depressio n i n a number o f place s othe r tha n Dr . Bauer' s office . Fo r year s sh e took com fort fro m religion , prayin g a t a Catholi c churc h durin g he r year s a t Mt . Holyoke, an d afte r returnin g hom e sh e looke d fo r a Catholi c churc h i n Boston. Bu t Raymon d neve r becam e Catholi c an d neve r seem s t o hav e felt muc h powe r i n religiou s practice . Sh e enjoye d th e ritua l o f lightin g candles an d sayin g prayers , bu t whe n he r grandfathe r die d "word s wouldn't come. " Rather tha n pra y tha t nigh t sh e shared a bottle o f win e with her father. " I drank—it wa s good—and s o to bed. " During period s of distres s Rut h frequentl y turne d t o alcoho l a s a mean s o f dealin g wit h her depression . "Th e secon d da y of crise on crise, getting drunk an d the n sobering u p s o I could slee p without passin g out, " sh e wrote. "Moment s of wildl y cryin g alou d fo r someon e t o hel p me—onl y brand y an d Harr y Richman do." 42 As her relianc e o n th e popula r singe r an d acto r Harr y Richma n indi cates, Ruth pulle d togethe r element s from th e popular cultur e to ease her depression. Sh e attended movie s severa l time s a week. Durin g on e eight month perio d sh e sa w 10 2 movies , includin g som e movie s tha t sh e sa w more tha n once . Durin g th e 1930 s sh e followe d popula r musi c o n th e radio an d collecte d album s o f he r favorit e songs . Sh e investe d hersel f emotionally i n th e live s o f movi e an d radi o celebrities , readin g abou t them, worryin g ove r thei r lives , and occasionall y writin g letter s t o the m or abou t them . I n he r diar y Rut h frequentl y wrot e o f actor s an d enter tainers as if they were her personal friend s whos e troubles she felt deeply . In a n earl y diar y entr y sh e wrote , "Glori a i s ill ! Lovely , incomparable , glorious Gloria ! I am prayin g fo r he r recovery. " Te n year s late r sh e fel t distraught a t th e new s tha t Wil l Roger s ha d bee n killed . " I can' t believ e it now ; h e wa s assumed , h e wa s par t o f one' s life , h e wa s America , an d more persona l losse s have shocke d m e less." 43 In fact , Rut h ha d bee n fortunat e i n the years through earl y adulthoo d and suffere d n o intensel y painfu l persona l losses . What he r lif e lacked i n tragedy, though , sh e seemed t o creat e through he r vicarious involvemen t in th e live s o f home-tow n peers , especiall y th e youn g me n wh o playe d sports for are a teams . After seein g one young athlet e at the movie theate r with hi s date , Rut h recorde d a t lengt h he r fear s fo r him : "Th e boy' s decent, an d she , tha t lovel y littl e thing , tri m coa t an d smar t ha t an d

The Fountain 1

69

silken leg s an d pretty , powdere d face , i s corruption . . . . This i s rea l t o me—corruption wit h a winsome whit e fac e . . . corruption showin g off , parading th e conques t o f healt h an d strengt h an d simplicity , smilin g t o right an d lef t s o that everyon e shal l see. " The next da y Ruth reflecte d o n her fear s fo r th e young man : "Thi s littl e game o f mine o f playing mothe r from a distanc e warn s m e tha t eve n drea m childre n giv e pain . Ho w much mor e childre n yo u d o no t choos e yourself! " Ruth's pla y a t motherhoo d addresse d a n emptines s tha t seeme d t o grow mor e pointe d a s sh e move d throug h youn g adulthood . Sh e wrot e lengthy passages describin g he r pain fo r suffering childre n whose misfor tunes radi o broadcaster s detailed , an d shortl y befor e he r twenty-fift h birthday sh e considered he r frustrate d hope s fo r a famil y o f he r own : " I cry wheneve r I se e childre n i n th e movies , crie d tonigh t whe n Barbar a Stanwyck i n a radio playle t stol e ti n soldier s fo r he r smal l brother . I had two lovel y afternoon s thi s fall , on e whe n th e littl e boy s fro m u p th e street cam e t o cal l an d I showe d the m father' s childhoo d collectio n o f fossils an d arrowheads , the other whe n th e elder o f them came alone an d we talke d geolog y o f al l things. " Rut h considere d thi s pai n uniqu e an d realized tha t he r usua l strategie s fo r self-comfor t di d no t apply . " I wa s used t o bein g bothere d b y othe r things , bu t no t this, " she wrote. "Ther e are substitute s fo r th e othe r things , after all." 44 Ruth Raymon d neve r marrie d o r ha d childre n an d i n that sens e faile d to fulfil l th e 1930 s prescriptio n fo r womanl y happiness . Paradoxically , she relie d mor e heavil y tha n man y o f th e diarist s o n cultura l material s for emotiona l fulfillment , bu t sh e neve r achieve d th e lif e thos e material s celebrated. I n place of the companionship o f marriage o r the intense love of motherhood , Rut h substitute d devotio n a s a fa n an d self-consciou s compassion fo r strangers . Films , music , popula r literature , an d sport s provided Rut h wit h bot h th e image s an d th e relationship s aroun d whic h she buil t he r emotiona l life . Ruth eventuall y finished he r colleg e degre e throug h th e Harvar d Ex tension progra m an d worke d fo r mor e tha n twent y year s a s a medica l librarian. Althoug h he r caree r ma y no t hav e seeme d t o he r a fitting sub stitute fo r th e famil y sh e wanted , he r diar y entrie s an d correspondenc e into th e 1970 s indicat e tha t sh e buil t satisfyin g friendship s an d move d beyond th e depressio n sh e suffere d a s a young woman. 45 Although Rut h Raymon d seem s lonelie r tha n man y o f ou r diarists , her lif e recapitulate s i n it s wa y theme s tha t hav e appeare d consistentl y in th e diar y writin g o f middle-clas s wome n i n th e earl y decade s o f th e

170 The

Fountain

twentieth century . Popularit y wit h peers , romance , an d companionat e marriage serve d a s th e culturall y define d goal s an d measure s o f succes s for variou s stage s i n a woman's life , an d thes e goal s promise d ful l emo tional lives . Mos t middle-clas s wome n appropriate d thes e goal s an d shaped a n emotionolog y aroun d them . Ye t a tensio n persiste d betwee n emotional cultur e an d emotiona l experience . Som e wome n discovere d feelings o f confusio n o r emptines s instea d o f blis s i n romanc e o r com panionate marriage ; others, like Martha Lavel l or Ruth Raymond , foun d romance impossibl e t o achieve . Whereas thei r cultur e gav e them th e values, images , an d eve n th e script s fo r thei r emotiona l lives , i t als o deni grated th e war m relationship s the y migh t hav e foun d wit h othe r people , especially women , outsid e o f marriag e an d s o offere d meage r resource s for livin g through th e confusio n an d struggl e o f adul t life .

Notes

Notes to the Preface i. Chery l Cline , Women's Diaries, Journals and Letters: An Annotated Bibliography (Ne w York : Garlan d Press , 1989) , xii; Margo Culley , A Day at a Time: The Diary Literature of American Women from 1764 to the Present (Ne w York : Th e Feminis t Press , 1985) , 4-13 ; Marlen e A . Schiwy , A Voice of Her Own: Women and the Journal-Writing Journey (Ne w York : Simon an d Schuster , 1996) , 32 , 34 ; Caroly n G . Heilbrun , Writing a Woman's Life (Ne w York : Ballantine , 1988) , 15 , 37, 45-46 . 2. Fo r recen t description s o f thes e method s se e Amade o Giorgi , "Phenome nological Psychology, " i n Jonatha n A . Smith , Ro m Harre , an d Lu k Va n Langenhove, eds. , Rethinking Psychology (London : Sage , 1995) , 2 4~4 2 ; Barney Glaser , Emergence vs. Forcing: Basics of Grounded Theory Analysis (Mil l Valley, CA : Sociology Press , 1992) ; Kathy Charmaz , "Grounde d Theory," i n Jonatha n A . Smith , Ro m Harre , an d Lu k Va n Langenhove , eds., Rethinking Methods in Psychology (London : Sage , 1995) , 27-49 . 3. Th e recen t scholarshi p o n women' s developmen t i s vast. Amon g th e mos t prominent work s ar e Nanc y Chodorow , The Reproduction of Mothering: Psychoanalysis and the Sociology of Gender (Berkeley : University o f Cali fornia Press , 1978 ) an d Caro l Gilligan , In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women's Development (Cambridge , MA: Harvard Universit y Press, 1982) . Elly n Kaschak , Engendered Lives: A New Psychology of Women's Experiences (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1992 ) criticize s th e reli ance tha t Gilliga n an d Chodoro w plac e o n psychoanalyti c theory . O n women's way s o f understandin g an d dealin g wit h relationships , se e Ruth ellen Josselson, The Spaces Between Us: Exploring the Dimensions of Human Relationship (Sa n Francisco : Jossey Bass , 1992) , esp. 224-290 . 171

172 Notes

to the Freface

4. Th e Paper s o f Bet h Twigga r Goff , 90-M130 , 90-M8 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliffe College . The commen t wa s writte n i n Februar y 199 2 wit h refer ence to a n entr y writte n Decembe r 5 , 1934 , bo x 1 , volume 34 . Notes to Chapter 1 1. Viol a C . White , Partridge in a Swamp: The journals of Viola C . White, 1918-1941 (Taftsville , VT : Countryma n Press , 1979) , (Februar y 12 , 1918), 1 1 .

2. Ibid. ; J . H . Denison , Emotion as the Basis of Civilization (Ne w York : Charles Scribner s Sons , 1928) , vii, 6 , 21. 3. Theodor e R . Sarbin , "Emotio n an d Act : Role s an d Rhetoric, " i n Ro m Harre, ed. , The Social Construction of Emotions (Ne w York : Basi l Black well, 1986) , 83-90 ; Jame s R . Averill , " A Constructivis t Vie w o f Emo tion," i n Rober t Plutchi k an d Henr y Kellerman , eds. , Emotion: Theory, Research, and Experience (Ne w York , Academi c Press , 1980) , 308-316 . 4. O n Victoria n emotiona l culture , se e Pete r N . Stearns , American Cool: Constructing a Twentieth Century Emotional Style (Ne w York: New Yor k University Press , 1994) , chapte r 2 ; Kare n Lystra , Searching the Heart: Women, Men and Romantic Love in Nineteenth-Century America (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1989) , 3-11 ; Jan Lewis , "Mother' s Love : The Constructio n o f a n Emotio n i n Nineteenth-Centur y America, " i n Andrew E . Barne s an d Pete r N . Stearns , eds. , Social History and Issues in Human Consciousness (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1989) , 209-229.

5. Pete r N . Stearn s an d Caro l Z . Stearns , "Emotionology: Clarifyin g th e History o f Emotion s an d Emotiona l Standards, " American Historical Review 90 (Octobe r 1985) : 813-836; Stearns, American Cool; Paul C. Rosenblatt , Bitter, Bitter Tears: Nineteenth-Century Diarists and Twentieth-Century Grief Theories (Minneapolis : Universit y o f Minnesot a Press , 1983) , chap ter 3 ; Charle s Dickens , A Christmas Carol [1843 ] (Toronto : Banta m Books, 1986) , 77-78; John B . Watson, Psychology from the Standpoint of a Behaviorist (Philadelphia : J. B . Lippincott, 1919) , 199 . 6. Roderic k Nash , The Nervous Generation: American Thought, 1917-1930 (Chicago: Ran d McNall y an d Co. , 1971) , 136 ; An n Douglas , Terrible Honesty: Mongrel Manhattan in the 1920s (Ne w York : Noonda y Press / Farrar Strau s an d Giroux , 1995) , 3-28 ; White , Partridge in a Swamp (October 2 , 1921) , 63. 7. Lewis , "Mother' s Love" , 209-229 ; Stanle y Coben , Rebellion Against Victorianism: The Impetus for Cultural Change in 1920s America (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991) , 3-27 . 8. Gilber t H . Barne s an d Dwigh t L . Dumond , eds. , Letters of Theodore

Notes to Chapter i 17

3

Dwight Weld, Angelina Grimke and Sarah Grimke, 1822-1844, volum e 2 (Ne w York : D . Appleton-Century , 1934) , 560 ; Peter N . Stearns , "Girls , Boys an d Emotions : Redefinition s an d Historica l Change, " Journal of American History 8 0 (Jun e 1993) : 39-53 ; Joh n F . Kasson , Rudeness & Civility: Manners in Nineteenth-Century Urban America (Ne w York : Hil l and Wang , 1990) , chapte r 5 ; David S . Reynolds , Walt Whitman's America: A Cultural Biography (Ne w York : Vintag e Books , 1995) , 249-251 ; Lewis, "Mother' s Love, " 218-219 ; Burto n Raffel , Poets & Con Men: Emotional History in Late Victorian America (Hamden , CT : Archon , 1986), 9 . 9. Th e quot e i s fro m Willia m McDougall , "Shoul d Al l Taboo s b e Abol ished?" i n V . F . Calverto n an d S . D . Schmalhausen , eds. , Sex in Civilization (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1929) , 86 ; John C . Burnham , "Th e Progressive Er a Revolutio n i n American Attitude s towar d Sex, " Journal of American History 5 9 (Marc h 1973) : 885-908 ; Coben , Rebellion Against Victorianism, 43 ; Douglas, Terrible Honesty, 31-40 ; V. F. Calverton, The Bankruptcy of Marriage (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1928) , 12-14 , 34; Floy d Dell , Love in the Machine Age: A Psychological Study of the Transition from Patriarchal Society (Ne w York : Farra r an d Rinehart , 1930), 6 . 10. Viol a Good e Liddell , With a Southern Accent (Norman : Universit y o f Oklahoma Press , 1948) , 61-65 ; An n Mari e Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Lin coln: University o f Nebrask a Press , 1984) , 4-5, 29 . 11. Th e quot e i s fro m th e Paper s o f Marth a L a veil, Sophi a Smit h Collection , Smith Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Lavel l Papers ] folde r 2 , Februar y 25 , 1932; Gilma n M . Ostrander , American Civilization in the First Machine Age (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Row , 1970) , 122-123 ; o n advertisin g se e Daniel Starch , Principles of Advertising (Ne w York: McGraw-Hill, 1923) ; Edward K . Strong , Jr. , The Psychology of Selling and Advertising (Ne w York: McGraw-Hill , 1925) , chapters 9 an d 10 ; Albert T . Poffenberg , Psychology in Advertising (Chicago : A . W. Shaw , 1925) , 40 ; "Consumption ism" wa s coine d b y Samue l Straus s i n 1917 , se e Willia m Leach , Land of Desire: Merchants, Power, and the Rise of a New American Culture (Ne w York: Vintage Books , 1994) , 267-268 . 12. Melvi n E . Haggerty, Enrichment of the Common Life (Minneapolis : Uni versity o f Minnesot a Press , 1938) , 10-12 , 17-18 . 13. Willia m R . Leach , "Transformation s i n a Cultur e o f Consumption : Women an d Departmen t Stores , 1890-1925, " Journal of American History ji (Septembe r 1984) : 320 ; se e als o Susa n Porte r Benson , Counter Cultures: Saleswomen, Managers, and Customers in American Department Stores, 1890-1940 (Urbana : Universit y o f Illinoi s Press , 1986) . 14. Jessamy n West , Double Discovery: A Journey (Ne w York: Harcourt Brac e

174 Notes

to Chapter i

Jovanovich, 1980) , 46, 75 , 112 ; Vincent Sheehan , Dorothy and Red (Bos ton: Houghto n Mifflin , 1963) , 167-168 . 15. Doroth y Canfiel d Fisher , The Home-Maker (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e and Co. , 1924) , 259 . 16. Liddell , Southern Accent, 230-231 ; Th e Paper s o f Doroth y Weine r First , 92-M10, Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e Colleg e [cite d hereafte r a s Firs t Papers; the diary , a boun d volume , i s in a folde r b y itsel f an d wil l appea r with date s only] , March 2 8 an d Apri l 5 , 1929 . 17. Th e Paper s o f Clar a Savag e Littledale , A-157 , Schlesinge r Library , Rad cliffe Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Littledal e Papers] , bo x 1 , volum e 16 , March 14 , 1914 ; volume 17 , May 15 , 1915 . 18. Th e Paper s o f Rut h Raymond , 81-Mi8 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e College [hereafte r cite d a s Raymon d Papers] , box 1 , volume 3 , Novembe r 2, 1927 ; box 1 , volume 13 , October 3 , 1935 . 19. Emil y Tapscot t Clark , Ingenue Among the Lions: The Letters of Emily Clark to Joseph Hergesheimer, Geral d Langford , ed . (Austin : University of Texas Press , 1965) , (Jul y 4 , 1921) , n - 1 2 . 20. Lavel l Papers , folder 1 , February 29 , 1928 . 21. Th e Paper s o f Winifre d Lockhar t Willis , MC 3 69, Schlesinge r Library , Radcliffe Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Willi s Papers] , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , De cember 2 , 192 4 an d July 22 , 1923 . 22. Kasson , Rudeness & Civility, chapter s 2 an d 5 ; Karen Haltunnen , Confidence Men and Painted Women: A Study of Middle-Class Culture in America, 1830-1870 (Ne w Haven , CT : Yal e Universit y Press , 1982) , chapter 1 . 23. Stearns , American Cool, 274 ; Joh n Dewey , "Individualism , Ol d an d New," New Republic 6 1 (Februar y 5 , 1930) : 295 . 24. Willia m McDougall , Outline of Psychology (Ne w York : Charle s Scrib ner's Sons , 1923) , 436 ; John B . Watson, Psychology from the Standpoint of a Behaviorist, 397 ; John B . Watson, Behaviorism (Chicago : Universit y of Chicag o Press , 1924 , 1930) , 199 , 274 ; Warre n I . Sussman , " 'Person ality' an d th e Makin g o f Twentieth-Centur y Culture, " i n Culture as History: The Transformation of American Society in the Twentieth Century (New York: Pantheo n Books , 1973 , 1 9%4)> 271-285 . 25. Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , folder 2 , July 27 , 1930 . 26. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1971) , (November 1928) , 240 . 27. Joh n Dewey , Human Nature and Conduct: An Introduction to Social Psychology (Ne w York : Henr y Hol t an d Co. , 1922) , 138 . 28. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Hour of Gold, Hour of Lead: Diaries and Let-

Notes to Chapter i 17

5

ters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 1929-193 2 (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1973) , (Januar y 13-14 , 1930) , 120 . 29. Th e Paper s o f Doroth y Smit h Dushkin , Sophi a Smit h Collection , Smit h College [hereafte r cite d a s Dushki n Papers] , bo x 3 , volum e 2 , Februar y 10, 1930 .

30. Glady s Hast y Carroll , To Remember Forever: The Journal of a College Girl, 1922-1923 (Boston : Little , Brown an d Co. , 1963) , 19-20 . 31. Th e Paper s o f Glady s Bel l Penrod , Indian a Countr y Historica l an d Gene alogical Society , Indiana, P A [hereafte r cite d a s Penrod Papers . The paper s consist mainl y o f diarie s i n boun d volume s an d th e citatio n wil l furnis h the date . Whe n a n ite m othe r tha n a diar y i s used , w e provid e a brie f description o f th e item.] , November 1 , 1925 . 32. Alic e Mille r Mitchell , Children and Movies (Chicago : Universit y o f Chi cago Press, 1929) , 4-5; Edgar Dale , The Content of Motion Pictures (Ne w York: MacMillan , 1935) , 1 . 33. West , Double Discovery, 47 , 170 . 34. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , January 16 , 1935 . 35. Sumik o Higashi , Cecil B. DeMille and American Culture: The Silent Era (Berkeley: University o f Californi a Press , 1994) , 8-20 . 36. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 1 , February 20 , 1926 ; Martha Lavel l foun d "the chariot-rac e wa s th e mos t excitin g thin g I'v e eve r seen, " Lavel l Pa pers, bo x 1 , folder 1 , January 2 , 1927 . 37. Katharin e D u Pr e Lumpkin , The Making of a Southerner (Ne w York : Knopf, 1946) , 200 . 38. Penro d Papers , Septembe r 27 , 1919 ; on th e impac t o f movie s i n the 1920 s see Lary May , Screening Out the Fast: The Birth of Mass Culture and the Motion Ficture Industry (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press, 1980), 109 146. Roderic k Nash' s thesi s i n Nervous Generation i s tha t American s i n the 1920 s tende d t o hol d ont o earlie r truth s t o hel p the m dea l wit h th e clamor o f th e ne w culture . 39. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 12 , August 1934-June , 1935 , 2.55—2.61; it i s not clea r i f thi s wa s he r movi e attendanc e fo r fiv e month s o r fo r on e month. Lawrenc e Levin e discusse s th e appropriatio n o f mas s cultur e ma terials i n "Th e Folklor e o f Industria l Society : Popular Cultur e an d It s Au dience," American Historical Review 97 (Decembe r 1992) : 1380-1392 . 40. Emil e Coue , Self-Mastery through Conscious Autosuggestion (Ne w York : American Librar y Service , 1922) ; Lillia n Roth , 17 / Cry Tomorrow (Ne w York: Frederick Fell , 1954) , 42-43; Jane Sherman, Soaring: The Diary and Letters of a Denishawn Dancer in the Far East, 1925-1926 (Middletown , CT: Wesleya n Universit y Press , 1976) , (Decembe r 29 , 1925) , 84 ; o n th e therapeutic cultur e se e Donal d Meyer , The Positive Thinkers: Religion as

176 Notes

to Chapter 1

Pop Psychology from Mary Baker Eddy to Oral Roberts (Ne w York : Pantheon Books , 1965 , 1980) , 23-45 ; T . J . Jackso n Lears , "Fro m Salva tion t o Self-Realization : Advertisin g an d th e Therapeuti c Root s o f th e Consumer Culture , 1880-1930, " i n Richar d Wrightma n Fo x an d T . J . Jackson Lears , eds., The Culture of Consumption: Critical Essays in American History, 1880-1890 (Ne w York : Pantheon , 1983) , 1-38 . 41. Marjori e Kinna n Rawlings , Selected Letters of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, Gordon E . Bigelo w an d Laur a V . Monti , eds . (Gainesville : Universit y o f Florida Press , 1983) , (Octobe r 1918) , 19-20 . 42. Th e Paper s o f Hele n Howe , 77-M218 , 78-M104 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliffe College , bo x 1 , folde r 292 , 14-15 . [Thi s memoi r o f Hele n Howe's affai r wit h Joh n Marquand , th e onl y ite m use d fro m he r papers , will hereafte r appea r a s Howe Memoir. ] 43. lon e Robinson , A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York : E . P . Dutton , 1946) , (November 25 , 1927) , 26 . 44. L a veil Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , July 23 , 1930 . 45. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , June 30 , 1925 . 46. Firs t Papers , January 31 , 1929. 47. Dal e Carnegie , How to Win Friends and Influence People (Ne w York : Simon an d Schuster , [1936 ] 1964) , chapter 2 , parts 3-6 . 48. Georg e Herber t Mead , Mind, Self, and Society: From the Standpoint of a Social Behaviorist, Charle s W. Morris, ed. (Chicago : University of Chicag o Press, 1934 , 1962) , 135-144 ; Arthu r Wallac e Calhoun , "Th e Chil d a s a Social Product, " i n V . F . Calverto n an d Samue l D . Schmalhausen , The New Generation: The Intimate Problems of Modern Parents and Children (New York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1930) , 74 ; Margaret Mead , Letters from the Field, 1925-1975 (Ne w York : Harpe r & Row , 1977) , (Decembe r n , 1925), 40 . 49. Sarbin , "Emotio n an d Act, " 88-91 , distinguishe s betwee n dramatisti c rhe torical acts , i n whic h th e individua l draw s upo n a wid e rang e o f cultura l scripts for emotion , an d dramaturgica l acts , in which the individual shape s the scrip t a s demande d b y th e situation . Althoug h w e d o no t us e thes e terms i n ou r text , w e tak e fo r grante d tha t i n recordin g thei r emotiona l experiences wome n engage d i n bot h kind s o f rhetorica l acts . 50. White , Partridge in a Swamp, n ; Sall y Wood, ed. , The Southern Mandarins: Letters of Caroline Gordon to Sally Wood, 1924-193 7 (Bato n Rouge: Louisiana Stat e University Press , 1984) , 63 , 81-82 . 51. Penro d papers , November 20 , 1925 . 52. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Yo u an d You r Worries, " Good Housekeeping 75 (Decembe r 1922) : 153-154 ; o n emotiona l managemen t se e Arlie Rus sell Hochschild , The Managed Heart: Commercialization of Human Feel-

Notes to Chapter 2 17

7

ings (Berkeley : Universit y o f Californi a Press , 1983) , 35-5 5 an d Stearns , American Cool, chapte r 8 . 53. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , July 1929 ; Penrod Papers , September 24 , 1927.

Notes to Chapter 2 1. Th e Paper s o f Bet h Twigga r Goff , 90-M130 , 90-M8 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliffe Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Gof f Papers] , bo x 1 , volum e 1 , Feb ruary 19 , 1928 , February 24 , 1928 . 2. Warne r Fabian , Flaming Youth (Ne w York : Bon i Liveright , 1923) , 321 . Fiction concerne d wit h th e ne w yout h cultur e spanne d th e literar y spec trum, includin g work s a s differen t a s F . Scot t Fitzgerald , This Side of Paradise (Ne w York : Scribner , 1920 ) an d Carma n Barnes , Schoolgirl (New York : Horac e Liveright , 1929) . 3. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , March 1 , 1928 . 4. Th e gendere d sphere s o f yout h ar e discusse d i n Josep h F . Kett , Rites of Passage: Adolescence in America 1790 to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books, 1977) , chapte r 5 ; E . Anthon y Rotundo , American Manhood: Transformations in Masculinity from the Revolution to the Modern Era (New York: Basic Books, 1993) , 247-283 ; Carroll Smith-Rosenberg , "Th e Female Worl d o f Lov e an d Ritual : Relation s Betwee n Wome n i n Nine teenth-Century America, " Signs: Journal of Women in Culture and Society 1 (Autum n 1975) : 1-2-9 ; Ellen K . Rothman , Hands and Hearts: A History of Courtship in America (Cambridge , MA : Harvar d Universit y Press , 1987), 1 1 9 - 1 2 2 .

5. Ree d Ueda , Avenues to Adulthood: The Origins of the High School and Social Mobility in an American Suburb (Cambridge : Cambridge Universit y Press, 1987) , chapte r 5 , an d 119-151 ; Joh n Modell , Into One's Own: Prom Youth to Adulthood in the United States, 1920-1975 (Berkeley : University o f Californi a Press , 1989) , 79, point s ou t tha t onl y 6. 4 percen t of seventeen-year-old s graduate d fro m hig h schoo l i n 1900 , bu t 50. 8 per cent b y 1940 ; Kett, Adolescence, 245 . 6. Th e Paper s o f Adele Siege l Rosenfeld, 90-M109 , Schlesinge r Library , Rad cliffe Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Rosenfel d Papers ; al l o f th e diarie s ar e i n box 2 , s o citation s wil l includ e onl y th e volum e an d date] , volum e 1 , January 10 , 1931 ; Ueda, Avenues to Adulthood, 119 . 7. Kett , Adolescence, 215 , 218-219 , 2 355 Modell , Into One's Own, 119 ; Ueda, Avenues to Adulthood, 150-151 . 8. Miria m Va n Waters , Youth in Conflict (Ne w York : Republi c Publishin g Co., 1925) , 83 ; The Paper s o f Miria m Va n Waters , Schlesinge r Library ,

178 Notes

to Chapter 2

Radcliffe Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Van Waters Papers] , box 1 , volume 3 , August 30 , 1935 . 9. M . V . O'Shea , The Trend of the Teens (Chicago : Frederic k J . Drak e an d Co., 1920) , 17 .

10. Penro d Papers , Ma y n , 1926 ; Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , Decembe r 1927 undated . 11. An n Mari e Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Lincoln : University o f Nebraska Press , 1984), 1 . 12. Th e Papers of Harriet Louis e Hardy, Schlesinge r Library , Radcliffe Colleg e [hereafter cite d a s Hard y Papers] , box 1 , volume 3 , June 15 , 1933. 13. Be n B. Lindsey and Wainwright Evans , The Revolt of Modern Youth (Ne w York: Bon i an d Liveright , 1925) , 33 ; Robert Lynd , "Famil y Member s a s Consumers," Annals of the American Academy of Political and Social Science 160 (Marc h 1932) : 86-93 ; Gilma n Ostrander , American Civilization in the First Machine Age (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Row , 1970) , 21 ; Kenneth Kenniston , "Socia l Chang e an d Yout h i n America, " Daedalus (Winter 1962) : 145-171 ; Stuar t Ewen , Captains of Consciousness: Advertising and the Social Roots of the Consumer Culture (Ne w York : Mc Graw-Hill, 1976) , 139-143 . 14. Pear l Buck , My Several Worlds: A Personal Record (Ne w York: John Da y Co., 1954) , 92 ; Paul a S . Fass , The Damned and the Beautiful: American Youth in the 1920s (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1977) , 220-233; Ostrander, American Civilization, 21 . 15. Margare t Mead , Blackberry Winter: My Earlier Years (Ne w York : Wil liam Morro w an d Co. , 1972) , 95, 102-103 . 16. Ilk a Chase , Past Imperfect (Garde n City , NY: Doubleday, Dora n an d Co. , 1941), 5 1 .

17. Viol a C . White , Partridge in a Swamp: The Journals of Viola C . White, 1918-1941 (Taftsville , VT : Countryma n Press , 1979) , (Septembe r 22 , 1931), 126 .

18. Fabian , Flaming Youth, 92 ; Viola White , Partridge in a Swamp, (Decem ber 3 , 1922) , 126 ; Peter N . Stearns , "Girls , Boy s an d Emotions : Redefini tions an d Historica l Change, " Journal of American History 8 0 (Jun e 1993): 28-32 ; Modell, Into One's Own, 112-113 . 19. Carolin e Gordon , The Southern Mandarins: Letters of Caroline Gordon to Sally Wood, 1924-1937, Sall y Wood , ed . (Bato n Rouge : Louisian a State Universit y Press , 1984) , Sprin g 1926 , 25 ; Emily Tapscot t Clark , Ingenue Among the Lions: The Letters of Emily Clark to Joseph Hergesheimer, Geral d Langford , ed . (Austin : University o f Texas Press , 1965) , April 1923, 136 . 20. Dushki n Paper , bo x 3 , folder 2 , September 9 , 1926 . 21. Jan e Sherman , Soaring: The Diary and Letters of a Denishawn Dancer in

Notes to Chapter 2 17

9

the Far East, 1925-1926 (Middletown , CT : Wesleya n Universit y Press , 1976), April 19 , 1926 , 123 . 22. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , Septembe r 23 , 1929 , volume 4 , Janu ary 12 , 1929 , volume 5 , July 23 , 1929 . 23. Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , March 14 , 1928 , August 6 , 1930 . 24. Elizabet h Yates , My Diary — My World (Philadelphia : Westminste r Press , 1981), (Decembe r 6 , 1919) , 55 ; Sherman, Soaring, (Jul y 28 , 1926) , 181. 25. Mead , Blackberry Winter, 112 ; Penro d Papers , Ma y n , 1925 ; Raymon d Papers, bo x 1 , volume 4 , January 4 , 1928 . 26. Willia m I . Thomas, The Unadjusted Girl: With Cases and Standpoint for Behavior Analysis (Boston : Little , Brow n an d Co. , 1923) , 72 ; Lind a W . Rosenzweig, The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993) , 22-23; Rut h M . Alexander , The "Girl Problem'': Female Sexual Delinquency in New York, 1900-1930 (Ithaca : Cornel l Universit y Press , 1995) , 1-2; Caroly n Strange , Toronto's Girl Problem: The Perils and Pleasures of the City, 1880-1930 (Toronto : Universit y o f Toront o Press , 1995) , 9? Mary E . Odem, Delinquent Daughters: Protecting and Policing Adolescent Female Sexuality in the United States, 1885-1920 (Chape l Hill : University of Nort h Carolina , 1995) , chapter 1 . 27. Doroth y Di x (pseudonym) , Dorothy Dix — Her Book: Every-day Help for Every-day People (Ne w York : Fun k an d Wagnall s Co. , 1926) , 303 ; Louis Berman, The Glands Regulating Personality: A Study of the Glands of Internal Secretion in Relation to the Types of Human Nature (Ne w York : MacMillan, 1922) , 212 ; Hutchin s Hapgood , A Victorian in the Modern World (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e and Company , 1939) , 501. 28. Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , January 8 , 1928 . 29. Jessamy n West , Double Discovery: A Journey (Ne w York: Harcourt Brac e Jovanovich, 1980) , 271 ; Gordon, Southern Mandarins, (1925) , 18 . 30. Kett , Adolescence, 261, point s ou t tha t neckin g an d pettin g ar e i n th e youth vocabular y befor e 1920 ; Modell, Into One's Own, 89 . 31. Ueda , Avenues to Adulthood, 147 ; Ellen K . Rothman , Hands and Hearts: A History of Courtship in America (Cambridge , MA : Harvar d Universit y Press, 1984) , 205 , point s t o th e us e o f bicycle s b y th e 1890 s a s a mean s for youn g couple s t o escap e thei r homes . Sh e give s th e perio d o f 187 0 t o 1920 a s th e tim e whe n Victoria n courtshi p practice s change d towar d th e modern version . Th e Paper s o f Halli e Ferguso n Davis , Special Collections , Vassar College , personal memoir , p . 8 . 32. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volume 15 , April 25 , 1907 . 33. Th e Paper s o f Dori s Stevens , 76-246 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e Col lege [hereafte r cite d a s Steven s Papers] , box 6 , "Cha p Book" . Th e "Cha p Book" i s not paginated .

180 Notes

to Chapter 2

34. Steven s Papers , bo x 6 , volum e 181 , April 14 , 1908 , Ma y 21 , 1908 , Ma y 22, 1908 . 35. Malcol m Cowley , Exile's Return: A Literary Odyssey of the 1920s (Ne w York: Vikin g Press , 1934) , 22 ; Corneli a Stratto n Parker , "A n America n Idyll, I : Episode s i n th e Lif e o f Carleto n H . Parker, " Atlantic (Marc h 1919): 300 .

36. Marjori e Kinna n Rawlings , Selected Letters of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, Gordon E . Bigelo w an d Laur a V . Monti , eds . (Gainesville : Universit y o f Florida Press , 1983) , (Septembe r 15 , 1918) , 18 . 37. O'Shea , The Trend of the Teens, 105 ; Penrod Papers , diar y fo r 1919 . 38. Bet h L . Bailey , From Front Porch to Back Seat: Courtship in TwentiethCentury America (Baltimore : Johns Hopkin s Universit y Press , 1988) , 1 3 24, describe s th e dat e a s i t cam e int o commo n practic e amon g middle class youth; Lindsey , Revolt of Youth, 25-26 ; Pamela Haag , "I n Searc h of 'The Rea l Thing' : Ideologie s o f Love , Moder n Romanc e an d Women' s Sexual Subjectivit y i n th e Unite d States , 1920-1940, " Journal of the History of Sexuality 2 (1992) : 547-577 . 39. Strange , Toronto's Girl Problem, n 9 - 1 2 0 ; Davi d Nasaw , Going Out: The Rise and Fall of Public Amusements (Ne w York : Basi c Books, 1993) , 85; Th e Paper s o f Mario n Taylor , A-86 , Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e College [hereafte r cite d a s Taylo r Papers] , bo x 1 , volum e 14 , January 1 8 and 31 , 1920. 40. lon e Robinson , A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York : E . P . Dutton , 1946) , (September 20 , 1928) , 46 ; Paper s o f Sara h Merr y Bradle y Gamble , MC368, Schlesinge r Library , Radcliff e Colleg e [hereafte r cite d a s Gambl e Papers], bo x 8 , volum e 164 , Marc h 19 , 1915 ; Modell, Into One's Own, 71-72; Loi s Banner, American Beauty (Ne w York : Knopf , 1983) , 176 . 41. Yates , My Diary — My World (Decembe r 31 , 1921) , 95 ; Dushkin Papers , box 3 , folde r 1 , June 20 , 1924 ; Rosenfel d Papers , volum e 1 , Februar y 6 , 1931; Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Ma y 14 , 1936) , 145 . 42. Herber t Blumer , Movies and Conduct (Ne w York : MacMillan , 1933) ; Hedda Hopper , From Under My Hat (Ne w York : Doubleday , 1952) , 45. 43. Sherman , Soaring, (Decembe r 9 an d 10 , 1925) , 66-67 . 44. Th e Diar y o f Isabell e McNeli s Sickler , Tyron e Historica l Society , Tyrone , PA [hereafte r cite d a s Sickle r Diary] , August 10 , 1922 . 45. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 1 , June 20 , 1924 . 46. Firs t Papers , March 6 , 1929 , April 22 , 1929 , December 16 , 1929 . 47. Rosenfel d Papers , volume 1 , June 5 , 1931 , February 14 , 1931. 48. Firs t Papers , January 8 and 16 , 1929 , Februar y 3 and 10 , 1929 , Ma y n , 1929. 49. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 4 , November 2 7 an d 28 , 1927 . 50. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 1 , August 21 , 1924.

Notes to Chapter 2 18

1

51. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1971) , (April 1928) , 160-161 . 52. Taylo r Papers , box 1 , volume 14 , June 1 9 an d 30 , 1920 . 53. L a veil Papers , volum e 1 , January 18 , 1928 , July 7 , 1928 ; Taylo r Papers , box 1 , volume 14 , January 9 , 1925 . 54. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , January 9 , 1925 , February 21 , 1924 . 55. Doroth y Bromle y an d Florenc e Haxto n Britten , Youth and Sex: A Study of 1300 College Students (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Brothers , 1938) , 3 ; Ernest W . Burgess , "Sociologica l Aspect s o f th e Se x Life o f th e Unmarrie d Adult," i n Ir a S . Wile, The Sex Life of the Unmarried Adult: An Inquiry into and an Interpretation of Current Sex Practices (Ne w York: Vanguard , 1934), 138 . 56. V . F . Calverton , The Bankruptcy of Marriage (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co., 1928) , 92, quotin g fro m The New Student. 57. Grac e Elliot t Louck s an d Harr y Bone , The Sex Life of Youth (Ne w York : Association Press , 1929) , 67-72 ; Nation remar k fro m Burgess , "Sociolog ical Aspects," 125 . 58. Sherman , Soaring, (Decembe r 20 , 1925) , 78 , (Ma y 21 , 1926), 148 . 59. Lavel l Papers, volume 2 , February 12 , 1930 ; Penrod Papers , April 9, 1925 . 60. Firs t Papers , February 17 , 1929 . 61. Rosenfel d Papers , volum e 1 , Apri l 18 , 1931 , November 8 , 193 1 bu t o n page fo r Januar y 15 , 1931. 62. Rosenfel d Papers , volume 1 , May 1930 , May 14 , 1931. 63. Rosenfel d Papers , volum e 1 , Novembe r 2 , 1931 , December 4 , 1931 , August 1 , 193 1 bu t o n pag e fo r Jul y 6 , 1931 . 64. Kare n Lystra , Searching the Heart: Women, Men and Romantic Love in Nineteenth-Century America (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1989) , 27, 42 ; Warren I . Sussman , " 'Personality ' an d th e Makin g o f Twentieth Century Culture, " in Culture as History: The Transformation of American Society in the Twentieth Century (Ne w York : Pantheo n Books , 1973 , 1984), 271-285 ; T. J . Jackso n Lears , No Place of Grace: Antimodernism and the Transformation of American Culture, 1880-1929 (Ne w York : Pantheon Books , 1981) , 39 ; Phili p Cushman , "Wh y th e Sel f i s Empty : Toward a Historicall y Situate d Psychology, " American Psychologist 4 5 (May 1990) : 599-611 ; Willia m H . Sheldon , "Socia l Trait s an d Morpho logic Types, " Journal of Personnel Research 6 (1927) : 47-55; Ueda, Avenues to Adulthood, 132-136) ; Clark , Ingenue Among the Lions, (Apri l 1923), 138 ; Robinson, A Wall to Paint On, (Septembe r 20 , 1928) , 45. 65. Vincen t Sheehan , Dorothy and Red (Boston : Houghto n Mifflin , 1963) , 229.

66. Yates , My Diary — My World, (Apri l 26 , 1918) , 27 ; Ueda , Avenues to

182 Notes

to Chapter 2

Adulthood, 129 ; Rosenfel d Papers , volum e 1 , April 7 , 1936 , 35 ; Gambl e Papers, box 8 , volume 163 , May 3 and 30 , 1912 . 6j. Ueda , Avenues to Adulthood, 129 ; Penrod Papers , Octobe r 21 , 1922. 68. Gambl e Papers , bo x 8 , volume 163 , May 3 , 1912 . 69. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 3 , May-Septembe r 1927 ; volum e 8 , May-August 1930 , August 8 , 1930 . 70. Penro d Papers , Januar y 14 , 1924 ; compar e Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d Lura Ell a Beam , A Thousand Marriages: A Medical Study of Sex Adjustment (Baltimore : William s an d Wilkin s Co. , 1931) , 21 ; T . J . Jackso n Lears, Fables of Abundance: A Cultural History of Advertising in America (New York : Basi c Books, 1994) , 69 . 71. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 3 , October 16 , 1927 . 72. Elino r Glyn , The Philosophy of Love (Ne w York : Authors ' Press , 1923) , 146; Lavel l Papers , volum e 1 , Jul y 7 , 1928 ; Banner , American Beauty, 206-207.

73. I . M. Hote p (pseudonym) , Love and Happiness: Intimate Problems of the Modern Woman (Ne w York : Knopf , 1938) , 133 . 74. Sherman , Soaring, (Ma y 10 , 1926) , 138 ; Dushkin Papers , bo x 3 , folder 1 , March 1 , 1920 ; Gordon, Southern Mandarins, (Sprin g 1932) , 101. 75. Glady s Hast y Carroll , To Remember Forever: The journal of a College Girl, 1922-1923 (Boston : Little Brow n an d Co. , 1963) , 254 . j6. Phylli s Blanchard , The Adolescent Girl: A Study from the Psychoanalytic Viewpoint (Ne w York : Moffa t Yar d an d Co. , 1920) , 50 . 77. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Yo u an d You r Worries, " Good Housekeeping 75 (Decembe r 1922) : 152 ; Harve y Green , The Uncertainty of Everyday Life, 1915-1945 (Ne w York: Harpe r Collins , 1992) , 176 . 78. Elino r Glyn , "It" (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1927) , 46 . 79. Green , Uncertainty, 176 ; T . J . Jackso n Lears , Fables of Abundance: A Cultural History of Advertising in America (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1994), 171-172 ; Margare t Sanger , Happiness in Marriage [1926 ] (Elms ford, NY : Maxwell Reprin t Co. , 1969) , 55 . 80. Firs t Papers , January 17 , 1929 ; Taylor Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , May 6 , 1920; Yates, My Diary — My World, (Januar y 5 , 1921) , 81. 81. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , June 25 , 1926 , volum e 10 , Septembe r 19 , 1928. 82. Viol a Good e Liddell , With a Southern Accent (Norman : Universit y o f Oklahoma Press , 1948) , 80-81 . 83. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , February 25 , 1928 . 84. H . D . Hill , "Wanted : Personality, " Atlantic Monthly 14 3 (Marc h 1929) : 352; "It" (1927) ; A . A . Roback , "Personality : Th e Ver y Cru x o f Huma n Relationships," The Century 11 9 (Octobe r 1929) : 98.

Notes to Chapter 2 18

3

85. Hotep , Love and Happiness, 74 . 86. Firs t Papers , January 17 , 1929 . 87. Lillia n Roth , I'll Cry Tomorrow (Ne w York : Frederic k Fell , 1954) , 53 ; Raymond Papers , bo x 1 , volume 5 , June 21 , 1929. 88. Blumer , Movies and Conduct, 154 . 89. Marth a L a veil rea d thi s i n a colum n b y Doroth y Dix , L a veil Papers , vol ume 1 , April 2 , 1928 . 90. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , February 28 , 1929 . 91. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 5 , Jul y 26 , 1915 ; volum e 12 , Septembe r 1918 undated . 92. Firs t Papers , Februar y 26 , 1929 . 93. Firs t Papers, February 23 , 1929 . 94. Modell , Into One's Own, 104 ; Jessie Lloyd O'Conner , Harve y O'Conner , and Susa n M . Bowler , Harvey and Jessie: A Couple of Radicals (Philadel phia: Temple University Press , 1988) , 79; Raymond Papers , box 1 , volume 4, June 17 , 1928 . 95. Chase , Fast Imperfect, 47-49 . 96. Firs t Papers , April 4 , 1929 . ^j. Firs t Papers , February 1 and 21 , 1929. 98. Floy d Dell , Love in the Machine Age: A Psychological Study of the Transition from Patriarchal Society (Ne w York : Farra r an d Rinehart , 1930) , 405; Fass , Damned and Beautiful, 56-57 . 99. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 10 , September 20 , 1928 . 100. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 5 , June 12 , 1928 , February 27 , 1928 ; volum e 24, Octobe r n , 1930 ; volume 24 , Septembe r 22 , 1929 . 101. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , Februar y 23 , 1928 ; volume n , Septembe r 21, 1928 ; volume 2 , Lat e Marc h 1928 , Marc h 16 , 1928 , volum e 12 , Oc tober 21 , 1928. 102. Gof f Papers , box 1 , volume 2 , March 15 , 1928; volume n , Septembe r 16 , 1928; volume 13 , January 1 , 1929 ; volume 12 , November 2 and 3 , 1928,; volume 16 , February 2 , 1929 . 103. Gof f Paper s bo x 1 , volume 2 , November 2 , 1928 ; volume 1 , February 19 , 1928; volum e 24 , Septembe r 23 , 1929 ; volume 12 , August 10 , 1928 ; In a personal communicatio n t o th e authors , Mrs . Gof f emphasize d th e socia l and persona l satisfaction s o f necking , a s oppose d t o sexua l desire . "Whe n a bo y 'necked ' m e wha t I enjoye d wa s hi s intens e interest. " Sh e becam e genuinely sensuall y aliv e onl y muc h late r i n life . 104. Fabian , Flaming Youth, y% Kevi n White , The First Sexual Revolution: The Emergence of Male Heterosexuality in Modern America (Ne w York : New Yor k Universit y Press , 1993) , chapter 1 . 105. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 24 , September 18 , 1929 .

184 Notes

to Chapter 2

106. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , December 19 , 1928 ; volume 24 , Octobe r 11, 1930 ; volum e 1 , Februar y 25 , 1928 ; Haag , "I n Searc h o f 'Th e Rea l Thing,' " 547-577 107. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , February 20 , 1923 ; Modell, Into One's Own, 95-96. 108. Katherin e Bemen t Davis , Factors in the Sex Life of Twenty-Two Hundred Women (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Brothers , 1929) , 247-250 ; Thomas , Unadjusted Girl, 95 . 109. Steve n Seidman , Romantic Longings: Love in America, 1830-1980 (Ne w York: Routledge , 1991) ; Lillia n Faderman , Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers: A History of Lesbian Life in Twentieth-Century America (Ne w York : Columbia Universit y Press , 1991) , 52 , 88-90 , 99 ; Bromle y an d Britten , Youth and Sex, 118 , bu t 120-12 1 make s thi s ambiguous ; Georg e Chaun cey Jr., "Fro m Sexua l Inversion t o Homosexuality : Th e Changin g Medica l Conceptualization o f Female Deviance," in Kathy Peis s and Christin a Sim mons, eds., Passion and Power: Sexuality in History (Philadelphia : Templ e University Press , 1989) , 107 . n o . Blanchard , The Adolescent Girl, 169 ; Mead, Blackberry Winter, n 2 - 1 1 3 . i n . Lavel l Papers , volum e 1 , April 2 , 1928 , August 16 , 1929 ; volume 2 , Ma y 1, 1931. 112. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 14 , 1929 , January 15 , 1930 , May 10 , 1933 , April 14 , 1935 . 113. Th e Paper s o f Azali a Peet , Sophi a Smit h Collection , Smit h Colleg e [here after cite d a s Peet Papers], December 14 , 1913 . 114. Rosenfel d Papers , volume 1 , January 8 , 1931 . 115. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 4 , March 30 , 1928 . 116. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 24 , Novembe r 1 , 1929 . I n a persona l com munication t o th e authors , Mrs . Gof f ha s writte n tha t sh e and Pegg y wer e sophisticated; the y kne w abou t femal e homosexualit y an d Bet h ha d rea d Radclyffe Hall' s The Well of Loneliness (1928) . But they never thought o f themselves a s lesbian s o r believe d tha t anythin g regardin g homosexualit y applied t o them . 117. Davis , Factors in the Sex Life, 251 ; Loucks an d Bone , Sex Life of Youth, 49-51; Blanchard , Adolescent Girl, 54 . 118. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volume 28 , Octobe r 3 , 1930 . 119. Louck s an d Bone , Sex Life of Youth, 50-51 . 120. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 5 , Marc h 15 , 1915 ; volum e 4 , Apri l 13 , 1915. 121. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , Marc h 22 , 1915 ; volum e 9 typescript , Februar y 1918 undated . 122. Blanchard , Adolescent Girl, 54 ; Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 12 , Octobe r 21, 1928 ; Taylor Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , April 28 , 1916 .

Notes to Chapter 3 18

5

123. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 4 , April 6 , 1915 ; volume 9 , Februar y 1918 , January 26 , 1918 , March 1918 . 124. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 12 , May 191 9 undated ; volum e 9 , Septem ber 19 , 1917 , January 2 , 1918 , April 1918 . 125. Taylo r Papers , box 1 , volume 14 , October 6 , 1919 , January 1922 ; volume 15, January 9 , 1925 . 126. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , January 4 , 1921 , January 16 , 1922 . 127. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 14 , January 4 , 1921 . 128. Taylo r Papers , bo x 1 , volume 5 , April 22 , 1915 . Notes to Chapter 3 1. Penro d Papers , Septembe r 27 , 1919 , November 17 , 1919 . 2. Jame s Reed , The Birth Control Movement and American Society: From Private Vice to Public Virtue (Princeton : Princeton Universit y Press, 1984) , 165; Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d Lur a Ell a Beam , The Single Woman: A Medical Study in Sex Education (Baltimore : Williams an d Wilkins , 1934) , chapter 16 , 405 , 432 ; see also Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d Lur a Ell a Beam, A Thousand Marriages: A Medical Study of Sex Adjustment (Balti more: Williams an d Wilkin s Co. , 1931) . 3. Dickinso n an d Beam , Single Woman, 128 , 204-205 , 211. 4. Joh n Modell , Into One's Own: From Youth to Adulthood in the United States, 1920-197 5 (Berkeley : Universit y o f Californi a Press , 1989) , 83 . Only 1 4 percen t o f wome n wh o graduate d fro m hig h schoo l marrie d b y age eighteen; only 1 5 percent o f high schoo l graduates di d not wor k befor e marriage. 5. Zeld a Fitzgerald , "Eulog y o n th e Flapper, " The Collected Writings, Mat thew J. Bruccoli , ed . (Ne w York : Collie r Books , 1991) , 391. 6. Phylli s Blanchard, "Th e Flappe r an d Socia l Evolution," Journal of Applied Sociology 1 0 (1926-1927) : 440-445 . Historian s toda y distinguis h be tween th e flappe r an d th e ne w woman . Commentator s i n th e 1920 s di d not alway s mak e thi s distinction . Jun e B . West , "Th e 'Ne w Woman, ' " Twentieth Century Literature 1 (July 1955) : 55-68 . 7. Ilk a Chase , Past Imperfect (Garde n City , NY: Doubleday, Dora n an d Co. , 1941), 51 ; Gamble Papers , bo x 8 , folde r 160 , 22 ; Lind a W . Rosenzweig , The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993) , 92 ; Elizabet h Yates, My Diary —My World (Philadelphia : Westminste r Press , 1981) , 102-103.

8. Stanle y Coben , Rebellion Against Victorianism: The Impetus for Cultural Change in 1920s America (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991) , 49; Doroth y Bromle y an d Florenc e Haxto n Britten , Youth and Sex: A

186 Notes

to Chapter 3

Study of 1300 College Students (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Brothers , 1938) , 8; Steve n Seidman , Romantic Longings: Love in America, 2 830-1980 (New York : Routledge , 1991) , 68 ; Anne Morro w Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Ne w York : Harcourt Brac e Jovanovich, 1971) , 6-7 . 9. Glady s Hast y Carroll , To Remember Forever: The Journal of a College Girl, 1922-192 3 (Boston : Little Brow n an d Co. , 1963) , 72-73 . 10. Lavel l Papers , volume 1 , October 3 , 1927 , December 192 7 undated . 11. Carroll , To Remember Forever, 80 , 82 ; William H . Chafe , The Paradox of Change: American Women in the 20th Century (Ne w York : Oxfor d University Press , 1991) , 70 , 101. 12. "Clar a Savag e Littledale, " i n Barbar a Sicherma n an d Caro l Hur d Green , eds., Notable American Women: The Modern Period (Cambridge , MA : Harvard Universit y Press , 1980) , 421-423 ; Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , vol ume 16 , January 6 , 1914 ; Marc h 23 , 1914 , Ma y 22 , 1914 , Decembe r 4 , 1914. 13. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volume 16 , January 10 , 1914 . 14. Bromle y an d Britten , Youth and Sex, 51 ; Carroll Smith-Rosenberg , "Th e New Woma n a s Androgyne : Socia l Disorde r an d Gende r Crisis , 1870 1936," i n Disorderly Conduct: Visions of Gender in Victorian America (New York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1985) , 253 ; Rosalin d Rosenberg , Beyond Separate Spheres: Intellectual Roots of Modern Feminism (Ne w Haven, CT : Yale University Press , 1982), 189-197 ; William H. Chafe , The American Woman: Her Changing Social, Economic, and Political Roles, 1920-1970 (London : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1972) , 102 , 111-115 ; William I . Thomas , The Unadjusted Girl: With Cases and Standpoint for Behavior Analysis (Boston : Littl e Brow n an d Co. , 1923) , 325-326 , 328 ; Paula S . Fass , The Damned and the Beautiful: American Youth in the 1920s (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1977) ; Sheil a Rothman , Woman's Proper Place: A History of Changing Ideals and Practices, i8yo to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1978) , 180-184 ; Pear l Buck , My Several Worlds: A Personal Record (Ne w York : John Da y Co. , 1954) , 91. 15. Elino r Glyn , The Philosophy of Love (Ne w York : Authors ' Press , 1923) ; Anne Hirst , Get You r Man — and Hold Him (Ne w York : H . C . Kinsey , 1937), 5 16. Pau l Popenoe , Modern Marriage: A Handbook for Men, 2n d ed . (Ne w York: MacMillan , 1925 , 1940) , 121-123 , 135 . 17. Herber t Blumer , Movies and Conduct (Ne w York : MacMillan , 1933) , 17 , 88-89. 18. Glyn , Philosophy, 187 ; Elinor Glyn , "It" (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1927), 10 .

19. Roderic k Nash , The Nervous Generation: American Thought, 191J-1930

Notes to Chapter 3 18

7

(Chicago: Rand McNall y an d Co. , 1971) , 137 ; Roland Marchand , Advertising the American Dream: Making Way for Modernity, 1920-1940 (Berkeley: University o f Californi a Press , 1985) , 53-62 . 20. Pee t Papers, December 14 , 1913 , September 17 , 1915 . 21. Yates , My Diary — My World, Jun e 28 , 1919 , 49-50; May 16 , 1925 , 175 . 22. Lavel l Papers , volume 1 , January 8 , 1928 . 23. Jan e Sherman , Soaring: The Diary and Letters of a Denishawn Dancer in the Far East, 1925-192 6 (Middletown , CT : Wesleya n Universit y Press , 1976), July 9 , 1926 , 173 ; December 30 , 1926 , 245 . 24. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 3 , October 12 , 1927 . 25. How e Memoir , bo x 1 , folder 292 , 20 . 26. lon e Robinson , A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York : E . P. Dutton, 1946) , July 30, 1929 , 102 ; August 10 , 1929 , 104-105 . 27. Carroll , To Remember Forever, 36-38 , 193 , 260. 28. Vincen t Sheehan , Dorothy and Red (Boston : Houghto n Mifflin , 1963) , quote fro m Septembe r 9 , 1927 , 33 , 15. 29. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folde r 2 , Ma y 27 , 1930 ; Emil y Tapscot t Clark , Ingenue Among the Lions: The Letters of Emily Clark to Joseph Hergesheimer, Geral d Langford , ed . (Austin : Universit y o f Texa s Press , 1965 ) (February 1923) , 118 ; How e Memoir , bo x 1 , folde r 292 , 57 ; Raymon d Papers, box 1 , volume 4, December 28 , 1928 ; Ann Marie Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Lincoln : University o f Nebrask a Press , 1984) , (Jul y 9, 1934) , 100 . 30. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , July 15 , 17 , 18 , 22 , 1923 , Septembe r 9 , 1923. 31. Viol a C . White , Partridge in a Swamp: The Journals of Viola C . White, 1918-1941 (Taftsville , VT : Countryma n Press , 1979) , (Augus t 21 , 1918), 28; (Marc h n , 1932) , 131 ; (January 4 , 1931) , 118 ; (Januar y n , 1931) , 119; Zelda Fitzgeral d t o F. Scott Fitzgerald, "Lat e summer/early fall 1930 " in Collected Writings, 456 . 32. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 18 , Octobe r 3 , 1916 , Octobe r 10 , 191 7 on page s fo r Januar y 1 9 an d 20 , 1916 . 33. Hirst , Get Your Man, 42-52 ; Clar a Savag e Littledale , "I f You r Hear t i s Broken," Good Housekeeping 7 5 (Septembe r 1922) : 23 , 168-172 . 34. Modell , Into One's Own, 105-106 ; Grace Elliott Louck s an d Harr y Bone , The Sex Life of Youth (Ne w York : Associatio n Press , 1929) , 34 ; Floy d Dell, Love in the Machine Age: A Psychological Study of the Transition from Patriarchal Society (Ne w York : Farra r an d Rinehart , 1930) , 343 . 35. Pee t Papers , April 6 , 1913 . 36. "Islan d communities " come s fro m Rober t H . Wiebe , The Search for Order, 1877-1920 (Ne w York : Hil l an d Wang , 1967) ; T . J . Jackso n Lear s has discusse d th e impac t o f moder n cultur e o n th e sel f i n variou s works , including "Fro m Salvatio n t o Self-Realization : Advertisin g an d th e Thera -

188 Notes

to Chapter 3

peutic Root s o f th e Consume r Culture , 1880-1930, " i n The Culture of Consumption: Critical Essays in American History, 1880-1890 (Ne w York: Pantheon , 1983) , 1-3 8 an d Fables of Abundance: A Cultural History of Advertising in America (Ne w York : Basi c Books, 1994) , 161. 37. White , Partridge in a Swamp (Jun e 26 , 1926) , 88 . Social scientists , includ ing historians , hav e characterize d thi s los s o f fir m value s an d confidenc e in a single self-understanding a s fragmented, mutable , saturated, o r empty . Thorn Verhave an d Willen va n Hoorn , "Th e Temporalization o f the Self," in Kennet h J . Gerge n an d Mar y M . Gergen , eds. , Historical Social Psychology (Hillsdale , NJ : Lawrenc e Erlbau m Associates , 1984) , 325-346 ; Kenneth J . Gergen , The Saturated Self: Dilemmas of Identity in Contemporary Society (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1991) , 44-49 ; Phili p Cushman , "Why th e Sel f I s Empty : Towar d a Historicall y Situate d Psychology, " American Psychologist 4 5 (Ma y 1990) : 599-611 . 38. Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn, (Septembe r 1922) , 6 ; (Ma y 18 , 1926) , 30-31; (Sprin g 2 8 undated) , 170-171 ; Yates , My Diary —My World, (June n - 1 5 , 1920) , 64-66 . 39. Low , Dust Bowl Diary, (Ma y 26 , 1930) , 37 ; Robinson, Wall to Paint On, (December 2 , 1927) , 27-28 ; (Ma y 10 , 1928) , 33. 40. Lavel l Papers , volum e 2 , July 12 , 1930 ; Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , August 12 , 1926 ; Jessamy n West , Double Discovery: A journey (Ne w York: Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1980) , 218 , 247 . 41. White , Partridge in a Swamp, (Jun e 24 , 1928) , 101 ; Yates, My Diary— My World, (Octobe r 26 , 1923) , 134 ; Leil a Secor , Leila Secor: A Diary in Letters, 1915-1922, Barbar a Moenc h Florenz , ed . (Ne w York : Bur t Franklin an d Co. , 1978) , (Marc h 26 , 1916) , 61. 42. Leil a Secor , Leila Secor, 140 ; Low, Dust Bowl Diary, (Ma y 7 , 1934) , 95 , (January 2 , 1937) , 174 ; William H . Chafe , The Paradox of Change: American Women in the 20th Century (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991), 1 0 9 — i n .

43. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 16 , Apri l 13 , 1914 ; Clar a Savag e Little dale, "Ca n a Gir l Affor d t o Marry? " Good Housekeeping 7 3 (Novembe r 1921): 15/f ; Dickinso n an d Beam , Single Woman, 133 . 44. Be n B. Lindsey and Wainwright Evans , The Revolt of Modern Youth (Ne w York: Bon i an d Liveright , 1925) , 121 ; Louck s an d Bone , Sex Life of Youth, 25 . 45. Doroth y Di x (pseudonym) , Dorothy Dix — Her Book: Every-day Help for Every-day People (Ne w York : Fun k an d Wagnall s Co. , 1926) , 303 ; Louis Berman, The Glands Regulating Personality: A Study of the Glands of Internal Secretion in Relation to the Types of Human Nature (Ne w York : MacMillan, 1922) , 1-2 ; Do n Cabo t McCowan , Love and Life: Sex Urge and Its Consequences (Chicago : Pasca l Covici , 1928) , 17 1 o n glands ; Ed -

Notes to Chapter 3 18

9

ward K . Strong Jr., The Psychology of Selling and Advertising (Ne w York : McGraw-Hill), 1925 , 145-158 ; Danie l Starch , Principles of Advertising (New York : McGraw-Hill , 1923 ) chapte r 12 ; Alber t T . Poffenberg , Psychology in Advertising (Chicago : A. W. Shaw , 1925) , 25-26 . 46. Josep h Jastrow, "Th e Implication s o f Sex, " in V. F. Calverton an d Samue l D. Schmalhausen , eds. , The Next Generation (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co., 1930) , 130 ; Glyn, Philosophy, 78 , 107 . 47. Josep h F . Kett , Rites of Passage: Adolescence in America 1790 to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books, 1977) , 261 ; Dickinson an d Beam , Single Woman, chapte r 16; Bromley an d Britten , Youth and Sex, 3-5 . 48. Phylli s Blanchard , The Adolescent Girl: A Study from the Psychoanalytic Viewpoint (Ne w York : Moffa t Yar d an d Co. , 1920) , 178 ; Dickinson an d Beam, Thousand Marriages, 76-77 an d Single Woman, 405 , 432 ; Elto n Mayo, "Shoul d Marriag e b e Monotonous? " Harpers Monthly 15 1 (Sep tember 1925) : 425-426; McCowan , Love and Life, 118 . 49. Lar y May , Screening Out the Past: The Birth of Mass Culture and the Motion Picture Industry (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1980) , 142 ; Elaine Tyle r May , Great Expectations: Marriage and Divorce in PostVictorian America (Chicago : Universit y o f Chicag o Press , 1980) , 101 ; Pamela Haag , "I n Searc h o f 'Th e Rea l Thing': Ideologies o f Love , Moder n Romance an d Women' s Sexua l Subjectivit y i n th e Unite d States , 1920 1940," Journal of the History of Sexuality 2 (1992) : 547-577 ; Firs t Pa pers, May 14 , 1929 ; West, Double Discovery, 229 . 50. Sherman , Soaring, (July , 16 , 1926) , 176 ; White , Partridge in a Swamp, (October 12 , 1918) , 29 ; West, Double Discovery, 102 . 51. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , Octobe r 14 , 1923 , September 27 , 1923 . 52. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 1 , July 1925 ; folder 2 , December 31 , 1926, March 14 , 1930 . 53. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volume 18 , October 8-9 , 1916 . 54. Quot e fro m Edwar d Carpenter , Love's Coming-of-Age: A Series of Papers on the Relation of the Sexes (London : Georg e Alle n an d Unwi n Ltd. , 1896), 16 . The deman d fo r Carpenter' s wor k wa s apparentl y greates t dur ing th e 1910s , wit h fiv e reprint s o f th e wor k betwee n 190 9 an d 1919 . Littledale Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 17 , Novembe r 30 , 1915 ; volum e 18 , October 8-9 , 1916 . 55. Dickinso n an d Beam , Thousand Marriages, 93 ; Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , Octobe r 22 , 1929 ; Howe Memoir , bo x 1 , folder 292 , 54 . 56. Willi s Papers, box 1 , volume 2 , November 30 , 1923 , November 26 , 1923 , March n , 1924 . 57. Dickinso n an d Beam , Single Woman, 135 ; see Goff Papers , bo x 1 , volume 24; Bromle y an d Britten , Youth and Sex, 70 ; Marjori e Kinna n Rawlings , Selected Letters of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, Gordo n E . Bigelo w an d

190 Notes

to Chapter 3

Laura V . Monti, eds . (Gainesville: University o f Florid a Press , 1983) , (December 15 , 1918) , 30 , 27 . 58. Penro d Papers , June 25 , 1924 , March 5 and 6 , 1922 . 59. Penro d Papers , April 29 , 1922 , May 13 , 1922 . 60. Dickinso n an d Beam , Single Woman, 130-131 ; Modell , Into One's Own, 144-146. 61. Penro d Papers , Novembe r 16 , 1922 , Decembe r 24 , 1922 , Decembe r 31 , 1919, June 17 , 1922 . Th e decisio n betwee n tw o lovers , on e wealth y an d one poor , wa s als o th e plo t o f a nove l tha t Glady s read , thoug h no t unti l after sh e resolved he r situatio n wit h Re d an d Junior . 62. Mari e Corelli , The Life Everlasting: A Reality of Romance (Ne w York : Grosset an d Dunlap , 1 9 n ) , 73 . 63. Penro d Papers , July 13 , 1922 , March 26 , 1922 , May 13 , 1922 . 64. Penro d Papers , Jul y 26 , 1924 , Marc h 18 , 1925 , Marc h 4 , 1923 . Cleli a Duel Mosher , wh o conducte d on e o f th e earlies t se x surveys , onl y man aged t o expres s he r passio n i n letter s t o a n imaginar y friend . Rosenberg , Beyond Separate Spheres, 205 . 65. Penro d Papers , Novembe r 1 6 an d 20 , 1924 , Decembe r 1 , 1924 , Apri l 1 , 1925. 66. Penro d Papers , following Apri l 22 , 1924 , January n , 1921 . 67. Penro d Papers , November 192 2 undated . 68. Corelli , Life Everlasting, 21 , 96-100, 135-137 . 69. Penro d Papers , Jun e 20 , 1922 , Ma y 30 , 1922 ; January-Februar y 1924 , notebook first page ; October 27 , 1925 . 70. Penro d papers , Ma y 18 , 1924 , Februar y n , 1925 , March 1 , 1925 , Apri l 21, 1925 ; Corelli, Life Everlasting, 378 . 71. Penro d Papers , Novembe r 192 2 undated , Apri l 9 , 1925 , July 14 , 18 , an d 2 1 , 1922 .

72. Penro d Papers , December 1 0 an d 12 , 1924 . 73. Dickinso n an d Beam , Single Woman, 428 , 166 , 210-211 . 74. I . M. Hote p (pseudonym) , Love and Happiness: Intimate Problems of the Modern Woman (Ne w York : Knopf, 1938) , 46; Glyn, Philosophy, 44-45 ; McCowan, Love and Life, 128-133 , s a v s homosexualit y i s no t a perver sion, bu t h e discusse s i t i n a chapte r o n sexua l perversions . H e believe d homosexuals wer e sexuall y unbalance d an d coul d benefi t fro m advance s in th e endocrin e field. Jeffre y Weeks , "Movement s o f Affirmation : Sexua l Meanings an d Homosexua l Identities, " i n Kath y Peis s an d Christin a Sim mons, eds., Passion and Power: Sexuality in History (Philadelphia : Templ e University Press , 1989) , 70-86 . 75. Harrie t Louis e Hard y obituary , Boston Globe, Octobe r 15 , 1993. 76. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Septembe r n an d 17 , 1933 , March 13 , 1933, Apri l 25 , 1934 .

Notes to Chapter 4 19

1

77. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , December 4 , 1934 , March 30 , 1932 , Septembe r 24 , 1931, Apri l 25 , 1934 . 78. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Decembe r 30 , 1931 , October 22 , 1931 , October 17 , 1932 . 79. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Februar y 12 , 1932 , Octobe r 18 , 1931 , April 24 , 1932 , Februar y 27 , 1933 ; Weeks, "Movement s o f Affirmation " deals with th e mal e versus femal e characteristic s o f lesbians . 80. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Januar y n , 1932 , Octobe r 17 , 1932 , April 24 , 1932 , December n , 1931 , February 27 , 1933 . 81. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , April 17 , 1932 . 82. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 6 , Octobe r 22 , 1935 , Decembe r 4 , 1934 , February 23 , 1935 . 83. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 4 Novembe r 2 , 1934 , Ma y 29 , 1935 ; vol ume 5 , January 5 and 23 , 1936 . 84. Harrie t Louis e Hardy , Challenging Man-Made Disease (Ne w York : Prae ger, 1983) , 24 . 85. Hardy , Challenging Man-Made Disease, chapter s 4 , 10 , 12 .

Notes to Chapter 4 Parts o f thi s chapte r appeare d i n a differen t for m i n An Emotional History of the United States, Pete r N . Stearn s an d Ja n Lewis , eds . (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k University Press , 1998) . 1. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 10 , July 22 , 1924 . 2. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 10 , February 24 , 1926 . 3. Beatric e Burton , The Flapper Wife (Ne w York : Grosse t an d Dunlap , 1925), 8 , 344 . 4. V . F . Calverton , The Bankruptcy of Marriage (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co., 1928) ; Viola C . White, Partridge in a Swamp: The Journals of Viola C. White, 1918-1941 (Taftsville , VT : Countryman Press , 1979) , (June 26 , 1926), 88 ; "The Rock y Roa d fro m th e Altar, " Literary Digest 7 7 (Febru ary 26 , 1927) : 31-32 ; Lar y May , Screening Out the Past: The Birth of Mass Culture and the Motion Picture Industry (Ne w York : Oxfor d Uni versity Press , 1980) , 142 . 5. Samue l D . Schmalhausen , "Th e Sexua l Revolution, " i n V . F . Calverto n and S . D. Schmalhausen, eds. , Sex in Civilization (Ne w York: The Macau ley Co. , 1929) , 40 6 (discusse s th e "ne w morality " o n pag e 401 ) an d "Family Life : A Study i n Pathology," i n Calverto n an d Samue l D. Schmal hausen, eds . The Next Generation (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1930) , 276; G . V . Hamilton , A Research in Marriage (Ne w York : Medica l Re search Press , 1929) , 3 .

192 Notes

to Chapter 4

6. Penro d Papers , January 12 , 1926 . 7. Sidne y Howard , The Silver Cord: A Comedy in Three Acts (Ne w York : Charles Scribner s Sons , 1927) , 194 . 8. Willia m A. Alcott, The Moral Philosophy of Courtship and Marriage (Bos ton: Joh n P . Jewett , 1857) , 43-44 ; Kare n Lystra , Searching the Heart: Women, Men and Romantic Love in Nineteenth-Century America (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1989) , 192-194 ; Jame s Reed , The Birth Control Movement and American Society: From Private Vice to Public Virtue (Princeton : Princeto n Universit y Press , 1984) , 20-33 ; Kevi n White , The First Sexual Revolution: The Emergence of Male Heterosexuality in Modern America (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993) , 172 174. 9. Carrol l Smith-Rosenberg , "Th e Femal e Worl d o f Lov e an d Ritual : Rela tions Betwee n Wome n i n Nineteenth-Centur y America, " Signs: Journal of Women in Culture and Society 1 (Autum n 1975) : 1-29 ; E . Anthon y Ro tundo, American Manhood: Transformation in Masculinity from the Revolution to the Modern Era (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1993) , 239-240 ; Arthur W . Calhoun , A Social History of the American Family, volum e 2 , From Independence through the Civil War (Ne w York: Barnes and Noble , 1918), 83 . 10. Steve n Mint z an d Susa n Kellogg , Domestic Revolutions: A Social History of American Family Life (Ne w York : Fre e Press, 1988) , 108-109 ; see also Reed, Birth Control, chapte r 5 ; Pete r N . Stearns , "Girls , Boy s an d Emo tions: Redefinition s an d Historica l Change, " Journal of American History 80 (Jun e 1993) : 39-53 ; Ree d Ueda , Avenues to Adulthood: The Origins of the High School and Social Mobility in an American Suburb (Cam bridge: Cambridge University Press, 1987) ; John Modell , Into One's Own: From Youth to Adulthood in the United States, 1920-1975 (Berkeley : University o f Californi a Press , 1989) , 105-106 ; Lind a W . Rosenzweig , The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993) , 6. 11. Joh n C . Burnham, "Th e Progressiv e Er a Revolutio n i n American Attitude s toward Sex, " Journal of American History (Marc h 1973) : 885-908 ; Ed ward Carpenter , Love's Coming-of-Age: A Series of Papers on the Relation of the Sexes (London : Georg e Alle n an d Unwi n Ltd. , 1896) , 72-80 ; Ellen Key , Love and Marriage, Arthu r G . Chater , trans . (Ne w York : G . P. Putnam's Sons , 1911) , 49-55; For recent evaluations o f the sexual change s of th e earl y twentiet h century , see : Car l N . Degler , "Wha t Ough t T o B e and Wha t Was : Women's Sexualit y i n the Nineteenth Century, " American Historical Review 79 (Decembe r 1974) : 1467-149 0 an d Rosalin d Rosen berg, Beyond Separate Spheres: Intellectual Roots of Modern Feminism (New Haven , CT : Yale University Press , 1982) , 179 , 185 , 204 .

Notes to Chapter 4 19

3

12. Mar y War e Dennett , "Se x Enlightenmen t fo r Civilize d Youth, " i n Calver ton an d Schmalhausen , Sex in Civilization, 101 ; Floyd Dell , Love in the Machine Age: A Psychological Study of the Transition from Patriarchal Society (Ne w York : Farra r an d Rinehart , 1930) , 341 , 403 132 . 13. Joh n B . Watson , "Afte r th e Family—What? " i n Calverto n an d Schmal hausen, Next Generation, 56-60 . 14. Sophonisb a P . Breckinridge, Women in the Twentieth Century: A Study of their Political, Social and Economic Activities (Ne w York : McGraw-Hil l Book Co. , 1933) , 101 ; V. F. Calverton, The Bankruptcy of Marriage (Ne w York: Th e Macaule y Co. , 1928) , 61-62 ; Charlott e Perkin s Gilman , "Se x and Rac e Progress, " i n Calverto n an d Schmalhausen , Sex in Civilization, 123; Margare t Sanger , "Th e Civilizin g Forc e o f Birt h Control, " i n Calver ton an d Schmalhausen , Sex in Civilization, 529 ; Lorinn e Pruette , "Th e Flapper," i n Calverto n an d Schmalhausen , Next Generation, 587 . 15. Ernes t R . Groves , Edna L . Skinner, an d Sadi e J. Swenson , The Family and Its Relationships (Chicago : J. B . Lippincott, 1932) , 165 , 174 . 16. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Hour of Gold, Hour of Lead: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 1929-19 3 2 (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1973) , (Jul y 2 , 1929) , 53 ; (Augus t 6 , 1929) , 64 ; Ann e Mor row Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1971) , (Marc h 1927) , 69.

17. Sickle r Diary , Septembe r 13 , 1922 ; Leil a Secor , Leila Secor, A Diary in Letters, 1915-1922, Barbar a Moenc h Florenz , ed . (Ne w York : Bur t Franklin an d Co. , 1978) , (Octobe r 1 , 1917) , 155 ; lone Robinson , A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York : E . P . Dutton , 1946) , (Decembe r 2 , 1929) , 122 123.

18. Hedd a Hopper , From Under My Hat (Garde n City , NY : Doubleda y an d Co., 1952) , 20 .

19. Vincen t Sheehan , Dorothy and Red (Boston : Houghto n Mifflin , 1963) , (March 12 , 1928) , 87 . 20. Willia m H . Chafe , The Paradox of Change: American Women in the zoth Century (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991) , 68 . 21. Rober t S . Lynd an d Hele n Merrel l Lynd , Middletown: A Study in American Culture (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e an d Co. , 1929) , n 8 - 1 2 0 ; Ham ilton, Research in Marriage, 82 ; Dorothy Dix (pseudonym), Dorothy Dix— Her Book: Every-day Help for Every-day People (Ne w York : Fun k an d Wagnalls Co. , 1926) , 306 . 22. Christin a Simmons , "Modern Sexualit y an d th e Myth o f Victorian Repres sion," i n Kath y Peis s an d Christin a Simmons , eds. , Passion and Power: Sexuality in History (Philadelphia : Templ e Universit y Press , 1989) , 165 166; Hannah M . Ston e an d Abraha m Stone , A Marriage Manual: A Prac-

194 Notes

to Chapter 4

tical Guide-Book to Sex and Marriage, rev . ed . (Ne w York : Simo n an d Schuster, 1935) , 155 ; Paul Popenoe , Modern Marriage: A Handbook for Men, 2n d ed . (Ne w York : MacMillan , 1925 , 1940) , 137-143 ; Elto n Mayo, "Shoul d Marriag e b e Monotonous? " Harpers Monthly 15 1 (Sep tember 1925) : 422 ; Rober t Lynd , "Famil y Member s a s Consumers, " Annals of the American Academy of Political and Social Science 16 0 (Marc h 1932): 87-89 ; Christin e Frederick , Selling Mrs. Consumer (Ne w York : Business Bourse , 1929) , 12 ; Dorothy M . Brown , Setting a Course: American Women in the 1920s (Boston : Twayne , 1987) , 106-108 ; Chafe , Paradox, 111-115 . 23. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Ada m a t Home, " Good Housekeeping 7 5 (Au gust 1922) : 49/"/; Anne Hirst, Get You r Man — and Hold Him (Ne w York : H. C . Kinsey , 1937) , 84-88 ; Frederick , Selling Mrs. Consumer, 29-31 ; Susan Strasser , Never Done: A History of American Housework (Ne w York: Pantheo n Books , 1982) , 203 , 244-248, 263-264 . 24. Lynd , "Famil y Member s a s Consumers, " 89 ; Grac e Elliot t Louck s an d Harry Bone , The Sex Life of Youth (Ne w York : Associatio n Press , 1929 ) gave tw o example s o f extravagan t wives , on e o f a spendthrif t husband , 94; Heart y Ear l Brown , "Th e Vacatio n o f Charli e French, " Atlantic Monthly 12 4 (Jul y 1919) : 54 ; Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Livin g Happil y Ever After, " Good Housekeeping 7 4 (Marc h 1922) : 15 , 154 ; Hirst , Get Your Man, 94 . 25. Hamilton , Research in Marriage, 97, 101 ; Elaine Tyler May, Great Expectations: Marriage and Divorce in Post-Victorian America (Chicago : Uni versity o f Chicag o Press , 1980) , 138 ; Christin e Frederick , The New Housekeeping: Efficiency Studies in Home Management (Garde n City , NY: Doubleda y Pag e an d Co. , 1912) , 103 ; Edna Clair e Ferris , "Diar y o f Edna Clair e Ferris , 1878-1931 " i n Eugen e Hutchinso n Mallor y III , ed. , Good Life and Hard Times: A Mallory Family History, publishe d b y edi tor, facsimil e i n Huntingto n Library , FA C 1083 , [hereafte r cite d a s Ferri s Diary], November 6 , 1929 . 26. Penro d Papers , January 17 , 1931 , July 15 , 1931. 27. Penro d Papers , April 1 4 an d 15 , 1931 , May 3 , 1931. 28. Frederick , Selling Mrs. Consumer, 45 . 29. Schmalhausen , "Sexua l Revolution," , 355 ; Watson , "Afte r th e Family, " 68. 30. Ston e an d Stone , Marriage Manual, 155 ; Katherine Bemen t Davis, Factors in the Sex Life of Twenty-Two Hundred Women (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Brothers, 1929) , 58 , y6; Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d Lur a Ell a Beam , A Thousand Marriages: A Medical Study of Sex Adjustment (Baltimore : Williams an d Wilkin s Co. , 1931) , 56 ; Hamilton, Research in Marriage, 233 , 537; Sheila Rothman , Woman's Proper Place: A History of Changing Ide-

Notes to Chapter 4 19

5

als and Practices, 1870 to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1978) , 179-180. 31. Hirst , Get Your Man, 116 ; Simmons, "Moder n Sexuality, " 169-170 ; Jeffrey Weeks , "Movement s o f Affirmation: Sexua l Meaning s an d Homosex ual Identities, " i n Peis s an d Simmons , Passion and Power , 166 ; Ellen Ke y Trimberger, "Feminism , Men , an d Moder n Love : Greenwic h Village , 1900-1925," Powers of Desire: The Politics of Sexuality, An n Snitow , Christine Stansell , an d Sharo n Thompson , eds . (Ne w York : Monthl y Re view Press , 1983) , 134 ; Steve n Seidman , Romantic Longings: Love in America, 1830-1980 (Ne w York : Routledge , 1991) , 4 ; Burnham , "Pro gressive Er a Revolution, " 901. 32. Reed , Birth Control Movement, 143-193 ; Rober t Lato u Dickinso n an d Lura Ell a Beam , A Thousand Marriages: A Medical Study of Sex Adjustment (Baltimore : Williams an d Wilkin s Co. , 1931) , 67 . 33. Modell , Into One's Own, 115 ; Davis, Factors in the Sex Life, 12 ; Hamil ton, Research in Marriage, 134 ; Marjorie Kinna n Rawlings , Selected Letters of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, Gordo n E . Bigelo w an d Laur a V . Monti, eds . (Gainesville : University o f Florid a Press , 1983) , 27 . 34. Hirst , Get Your Man, 12 . 35. Lyn d an d Lynd , Middletown, 112 ; Ben B. Lindsey, "Wisdo m fo r Parents, " in Calverto n an d Schmalhausen , "Se x i n Civilization, " 189 ; Hamilton , Research in Marriage, 346-347 ; Watson, "Afte r th e Family, " 65 . 36. Lindsey , "Wisdo m fo r Parents, " 189 ; Phyllis Blanchard , "Se x i n th e Ado lescent Girl, " i n Calverto n an d Schmalhausen , "Se x i n Civilization, " 540 ; Dennett, "Se x Enlightenment, " 99. 37. Dennett , "Se x Enlightenment, " 101 ; Hamilton , Research in Marriage, 204; Penro d Papers , April 28 , 1925 . 38. I . M. Hote p (pseudonym) , Love and Happiness: Intimate Problems of the Modern Woman (Ne w York : Knopf , 1938) , 46 ; Penrod Papers , Apri l 28 , 1925; Wilhel m Stekel , "Frigidit y i n Mothers, " i n V . F . Calverto n an d Samuel Schmalhausen , eds . The New Generation (Ne w York: The Macau ley Co. , 1930) , 247 ; Weeks, "Movement s o f Affirmation, " 169-170 . 39. Hamilton , Research in Marriage, 543 . 40. Pee t Papers , Augus t 23 , 1914 ; Margare t Marsh , "Suburba n Me n an d Masculine Domesticity , 1870-1915, " American Quarterly 4 0 (Jun e 1988) : 165-188; Francesc a M . Cancia n an d Steve n L . Gordon , "Changin g Emo tion Norm s i n Marriage : Lov e an d Ange r i n U.S . Women' s Magazine s since 1900, " Gender and Society 2 (Septembe r 1988) : 315 , 309 . 41. Popenoe , Modern Marriage, 137 ; Doroth y M . Brown , Setting a Course: American Women in the 1920s (Boston : Twayn e Publishers , 1987) , 102 103; Paula S . Fass, The Damned and the Beautiful: American Youth in the 1920s (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press, 1977) , 93; Francesca Cancian ,

19 6 Notes

to Chapter 4

Love in America: Gender and Self-Development (Cambridge : Cambridg e University Press , 1987) , 34 ; Mint z an d Kellogg , Domestic Revolutions, 113-114.

42. Margare t Sanger , Happiness in Marriage [1926 ] (Elmsford , NY : Maxwel l Reprint Co.) , 30 ; Elino r Glyn , The Philosophy of Love (Ne w York : Au thors' Press,i923) , 177 ; Littledale, "Ada m a t Home, " 49 , 128-131 . 43. Sanger , Happiness in Marriage, 177 ; Hirst, Get You r Man, 104 , 106 ; Dix, Dorothy Dix, 8-9 , 39 , 53-54 ; Cancia n an d Gordon , "Changin g Emotio n Norms," 317 . 44. Kevi n White, The First Sexual Revolution: The Emergence of Male Heterosexuality in Modern America (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993), 148 , 173-179 ; Cancian , Love in America, 37 . 45. Robinson , A Wall to Paint On, (Decembe r 12 , 1929) , 124 ; Sickler Diary , August 2 5 an d 26 , 1923 ; Sheehan, Dorothy and Red, (Octobe r 27 , 1929) , 167. 46. Hamilton , Research in Marriage, 7% Hirst , Get Your Man, 104 ; Mayo , "Should Marriag e B e Monotonous? " 427 ; Do n Cabo t McCowan , Love and Life: Sex Urge and Its Consequences (Chicago : Pasca l Covici , 1928) , 172.

47. Be n B. Lindsey and Wainwright Evans , The Revolt of Modern Youth (Ne w York: Boni and Liveright , 1925) , 138-139 ; McCowan, Love and Life, 7 2 73; Lorinn e Pruett e referre d t o Watson' s vie w i n "Som e Moder n Portrait s and Thei r Interpretations, " i n Ir a S . Wile, ed., The Sex Life of the Unmarried Adult: An Inquiry into and an Interpretation of Current Sex Practices (New York : Vanguard, 1934) , 296-297 . 48. Ilk a Chase , Past Imperfect (Garde n City , NY: Doubleda y Dora n an d Co. , 1941), 146-147 ; Lavel l Papers , volume 2 , May 16 , 1928 , June 3 , 1930 . 49. Jessi e Lloy d O'Conner , Harve y O'Conner , an d Susa n M . Bowler , Harvey and Jessie: A Couple of Radicals (Philadelphia : Templ e Universit y Press , 1988), 1 1 8 - 1 2 0 .

50. Chase , Past Imperfect, 146 ; First Papers , February 10 , 1929 ; V. F. Calver ton, The Bankruptcy of Marriage (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1928) , 7 2 , 150 .

51. Chase , Past Imperfect, 89 ; O'Conner , Couple of Radicals, 126 ; Pear l Buck, My Several Worlds: A Personal Record (Ne w York : John Da y Co. , 1954), 96; William L . O'Neill, Divorce in the Progressive Era (Ne w Have , CT: Yale University Press , 1967) , 67 . 52. Penro d Papers , January 13 , 1925 . 53. Rawlings , Selected Letters, (Novembe r n , 1933) , 8° ; Robinson , A Wall to Paint On, (Augus t 27 , 1934) , 239 , (Septembe r 30 , 1934) , 240 . 54. Willi s Papers , Biographica l sketc h b y Evelyn Harte r Glic k i n bo x 4 , folde r 43; bo x 1 , volume 2 , November 26 , 1923 , March n , 1924 .

Notes to Chapter j 19

7

55. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Ma y 7 , 1924 , Marc h 18 , 1924 , Ma y 24 , 1924. 56. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , September 5 , 1924 , July 24 , 1924 ; box 2 , volume 10 , August 2 , 1924 , 56 , July 22 , 1924 , 53 . $y. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , August 2 , 1924 , January 27 , 1925 . 58. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 2 , Octobe r 27 , 1924 , Jul y 3 , 1924 ; bo x 2 , volume 10 , January n , 1925 , yj. 59. Willi s Papers , bo x 2 , volum e 10 , Septembe r 5 , 1924 , 62 , Ma y 15 , 1925 , 94; bo x 1 , volume 3 , March 12 , 1925 . 60. Willi s Papers , bo x 2 , volum e 10 , Ma y 1 , 1928 ; Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 11 , January 19 , 1933 . 61. Willi s Papers, box 1 , volume 3 , February 23 , 1925 , May 15 , 1925 ; box 1 , volume 4 , June 11 , 1926; bo x 2 , volume 10 , November 13 , 1927 . 62. Willi s Papers, box 1 , volume 3 , May 15 , 1925; box 2 , volume 10 , November 2 , 1929 . 63. Willi s Papers , bo x 2 , folder 10 , December 24 , 1928 . 64. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , March 2 0 an d 23 , 1930 . 65. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , July 27 , 1930 . 66. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , February 11 , 193 1 67. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 11 , 1931. 68. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 5 , 1933 , March 1 , 1934 . 69. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 5 , 1933 , October 15 , 1935 . 70. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , May 10 , 1933 . 71. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , August 16 , 1930 . 72. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , December 31 , 1934. 73. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 23 , 1934 . 74. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , August 16 , 1930 . 75. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , December 31 , 1934. 76. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , November 23 , 1934 . 77. Willi s Papers , box 1 , folder 2 , Octobe r 14 , 1923 , February 15 , 1924 . 78. Willi s Papers, bo x 2 , folder 10 , May 193 7 undated , Februar y 2 , 1938 . Notes to Chapter j 1. Lavel l Papers , folder 1 , June 1 , 1930 , September 23 , 1930 . 2. Sidne y Howard , The Silver Cord: A Comedy in Three Acts, (Ne w York : Charles Scribner s Sons , 1927) , 87-88 , 91-92 . 3. Littledal e Papers , bo x 1 , volume 16 , June 3 , 1914 . 4. Howard , The Silver Cord, 193 . 5. Joh n B . Watson an d Rosali e Rayne r Watson , Psychological Care of Infant and Child (Ne w York : W . W . Norto n an d Co. , 1928) , 5-6 , 87 , 81 , 84 ; Ben Harris , " 'Giv e m e a doze n health y infant s . . . ': Joh n B . Watson' s

198 Notes

to Chapter 5

Popular Advic e o n Childrearing , Women , an d th e Family, " i n Miria m Lewin, ed. , In the Shadow of the Fast: Psychology Portrays the Sexes: A Social and Intellectual History, (Ne w York : Columbi a Universit y Press , 1984), 128 ; Floyd Dell , Love in the Machine Age: A Psychological Study of the Transition from Patriarchal Society (Ne w York : Farra r an d Rine hart, 1930) , 137 . 6. Pete r N . Stearns , American Cool: Constructing a Twentieth Century Emotional Style (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1994) , 34-36 ; Ja n Lewis, "Mother' s Love : Th e Constructio n o f a n Emotio n i n Nineteenth Century America, " i n Andrew E . Barnes an d Pete r N . Stearns , eds., Social History and Issues in Human Consciousness (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Uni versity Press , 1989) , 209-224 . 7. Evely n Whitaker, Laddie and Miss Toosey's Mission (Philadelphia : Henr y Altemus, 1897) . 8. Winfiel d Scot t Hall , "Th e Adolescen t Period : It s Problems , Regime n an d Hygiene," i n M . V . O'Shea , ed. , The Child: His Nature and His Needs (New York: The Children' s Foundation , 1924) , 314; Gene Stratton-Porter , Laddie: A True Blue Story (Garde n City , NY : Doubleda y Pag e an d Co. , 1913). 4379. Ferri s Diary , June 21 , 1906, August 22 , 1910 . 10. Lind a Rosenzweig , The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993), 112-113 ; Ferris Diary , July 19 , 1920 , March 5 , 1921. 11. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Ada m a t Home, " Good Housekeeping 7 5 (Au gust 1922) : 128-131 ; Joh n B . Watson , "Afte r th e Family—What? " i n V. F . Calverto n an d Samue l Schmalhausen , eds. , The New Generation: The Intimate Problems of Modern Parents and Children, (Ne w York: Th e Macauley Co. , 1930) , 55-73 . 12. Doroth y Blake , The Diary of a Suburban Housewife (Ne w York : Willia m Morrow, 1934) , 99. 13. Samue l Schmalhausen , "Famil y Life : A Study i n Pathology, " i n Calverto n and Schmalhausen , The New Generation, 278-279 , 287 ; Miria m Va n Waters, Youth in Conflict (Ne w York : Republi c Publishin g Co. , 1925) , 86; Winnifre d Richmond , The Adolescent Girl: A Book for Parents and Teachers (Ne w York : MacMillan , 1925) , 56 ; Ada Har t Arlitt , Adolescent Psychology (Ne w York: America n Boo k Company , 1933) , 89 . 14. Joh n B . Watson , "Afte r th e Family—What? " i n Calverto n an d Schmal hausen, The New Generation, 65 ; Lorinne Pruette , "Th e Flapper, " i n Cal verton an d Schmalhausen , The New Generation, 572 ; Doroth y Dunba r Bromley an d Florenc e Haxto n Britten , Youth and Sex: A Study of 1300 College Students (Ne w York: Harper an d Brothers , 1938) , 52 ; I. M. Hote p

Notes to Chapter j 19

9

(pseudonym), Love and Happiness: Intimate Problems of the Modern Woman (Ne w York : Knopf , 1938) , 46 ; Wilhel m Stekel , "Frigidit y i n Mothers," i n Calverto n an d Schmalhausen , The New Generation, 254 , 2-5515. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Puttin g I t U p t o Mother, " Good Housekeeping, 77 (Septembe r 1923) : 156 ; Doroth y Di x (pseudonym) , Dorothy Dix — Her Book: Every-day Help for Every-day People (Ne w York : Fun k an d Wagnalls Co. , 1926) , 322 ; Grace Elliot t Louck s an d Harr y Bone , Sex Life of Youth (Ne w York : Associatio n Press , 1929) , 87-89 ; Do n Cabo t Mc Cowan, Love and Life: Sex Urge and Its Consequences (Chicago : Pasca l Covici, 1928) , 136 ; Ann e Hirst , Get Your Man —and Hold Him (Ne w York: H. C . Kinsey and Co. , 1937) , 117-126 ; G. V. Hamilton, A Research in Marriage (Ne w York : Medica l Researc h Press , 1929) , n 6 - 1 1 7 . 16. Elino r Glyn , "It" (Ne w York : Th e Macaule y Co. , 1927) , 69 . Raymon d Papers, bo x 1 , volume 3 , October 18 , 1927 . 17. How e Memoir , bo x 1 , file 292, 58-59 ; Jane Sherman , Soaring: The Diary and Letters of a Denishawn Dancer in the Far East, 1925-1926 (Middle town, CT : Wesleya n Universit y Press , 1976) , (Ma y 10 , 1926) , 137-138 , (May 13 , 1926) , 143 ; Margare t Bourke-White , Portrait of Myself (Ne w York: Simo n an d Schuster , 1963) , 27 . 18. Sall y Carrighar , Home to the Wilderness (Boston : Houghto n Mifflin , 1973), 8 , 16,9 . 19. Oliv e Ewin g Clapper , One Lucky Woman (Garde n City , NY : Doubleda y and Co. , 1961) , 21 , 29, 35-40 . 20. Gof f Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 28 , Octobe r 5 , 1930 ; bo x 1 , volum e 1 , Feb ruary 27 , 1928 . 21. Glady s Hast y Carroll , To Remember Forever: The Journal of a College Girl, 1922-1923 ^Boston : Littl e Brow n an d Co. , 1963) , (Decembe r 2 , 1922), 145 ; An n Mari e Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Lincoln : Universit y o f Nebraska Press , 1984 ) 36-37 ; Sherman , Soaring, (Augus t 7 , 1925) , 34 ; Lavell Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , Februar y 9 , 1931 , box 1 , volume 3 , January 22 , 1933 ; Elizabet h Yates , My Diary —My World (Philadelphia : Westminster Press , 1981) , (Jun e 15 , 1924) , 145-146 . 22. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Bring Me a Unicorn: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich , Inc. , 1971), (lat e 1928) , 248 ; an d Hour of Gold, Hour of Lead: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 1929-193 2 (Ne w York : Harcour t Brace Jovanovich, 1973) , 6 , 15 . 23. lon e Robinson, A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York: E. P. Dutton, 1946) , (June 18, 1927) , 7 ; (Novembe r 20 , 1929) , 118 . 24. Marjori e Kinna n Rawlings , Selected Letters of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings,

2oo Notes

to Chapter 5

Gordon E . Bigelo w an d Laur a V . Monti , eds . (Gainesville : Universit y o f Florida Press , 1983) , (Novembe r 15 , 1918), 24 ; Penrod Papers , Septembe r 25, 1925 . 25. Susa n Strasser , Never Done: A History of American Housework (Ne w York: Pantheo n Books , 1982) , 230 , 240 ; Rober t S . Lynd an d Hele n Mer rell Lynd , Middletown in Transition: A Study in Cultural Conflicts (Ne w York: Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich , 1937 , 1965 ) 151 ; Steve n Mint z an d Susan Kellogg , Domestic Revolutions: A Social History of American Family Life (Ne w York: Fre e Press, 1988) , 121 ; Sheila M . Rothman , Woman's Proper Place: A History of Changing Ideals and Practices, 1870 to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1978) , 210-212 ; Pete r N . Stearns , "Girls, Boy s and Emotions : Redefinitions an d Historica l Change, " Journal of American History 8 0 (Jun e 1993) : 54 ; Stearns , American Cool, 165 168. 26. L . Emmet t Holt , The Care and Feeding of Children: A Catechism for the Use of Mothers and Children's Nurses, 5t h ed . (Ne w York : D . Appleto n and Co. , 1909) , 42-45 ; Daniel Beekman , The Mechanical Baby: A Popular History of the Theory and Practice of Child Raising (Westport , CT : Lawrence Hil l an d Co. , 1977) , 110-113 . 27. Christin e Frederick , The New Housekeeping: Efficiency Studies in Home Management (Garde n City , NY: Doubleday Pag e and Co. , 1912) , chapters 1 an d 2 on application s o f efficiency an d time and motion studie s to housework; Strasser , Never Done, 263-264 . 28. Willia m James , Psychology: Briefer Course i n William James: Writings 18-78-1899 (Ne w York : Literar y Classic s o f th e Unite d States , Inc., 1992 ) chapter 10 , an d page s 145 , 139 , 141 , 161 , 186 ; Mrs . Ma x West , Infant Care (Washington , D.C. : Governmen t Printin g Offic e [Car e o f Childre n Series No . 2] , 1914 ) 63 ; Ada Har t Arlitt , The Child from One to Twelve (New York : Whittlesey House , McGraw-Hil l Company , Inc . 1931) , 22 . 29. Holt , Care and Feeding of Children, 165 ; West , Infant Care, 60 ; Arlitt , Child from One to Twelve, 96. 30. Watson , Psychological Care, i n ; Va n Waters , Youth in Conflict, 66; Loucks an d Bone , Sex Life of Youth, 3 2; E . Anthony Rotundo , American Manhood (Ne w York : Basi c Books, 1993) , n 6 - 1 1 7 ; Rober t L . Griswold , Fatherhood in America: A History (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1993) , 8 8 94; Paul a S . Fass, The Damned and the Beautiful: American Youth in the 1920s (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1977) , 89-90 ; Sheil a Roth man, Woman's Proper Place: A History of Changing Ideals and Practices, 1870 to the Present (Ne w York : Basi c Books , 1978) , 210-213 . Historica l literature i s divided o n th e directio n o f chil d rearing , bu t appear s t o agre e on th e advic e agains t overprotectin g children .

Notes to Chapter j 20

1

31. Mildre d Brewster , Red Leaves (Ne w York : Pageant Press , 1959 ) 10 ; Clapper, One Lucky Woman, 131 . 32. Lindbergh , Hour of Gold (Jul y 30 , 1930) , 141 ; (March 1931) , 156 ; (Ma y 2, 1931) , 163 . 33. Sall y Wood, ed. , TA? e Southern Mandarins: Letters of Caroline Gordon to Sally Wood, 1924-1937 (Bato n Rouge : Louisian a Stat e Universit y Press , 1984), (1925) , 17 ; September 9 , 1926 , 27 . 34. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 3 , December 31 , 1936. 35. Clar a Savag e Littledale , "Yo u an d You r Worries, " Good Housekeeping 75 (Decembe r 1922) : 151. 36. Beatric e Burton , The Flapper Wife (Ne w York : Grosse t an d Dunlap , i92-5)5 344 37. Penro d Papers , Decembe r 30 , 1924 ; Kathlee n M . Blee , Women of the Klan: Racism and Gender in the 1920s (Berkeley : University o f Californi a Press, 1991) , 11-12 , 46 , 52 . 38. Fass , The Damned and The Beautiful, 89-90 ; Griswold , Fatherhood in America, 93 ; Rotundo, American Manhood, 116-117 . 39. Doroth y Canfiel d Fisher , The Homemaker (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e and Co. , 1924) , 17 8 an d What Grandmother Did Not Know (Boston : The Pilgrim Press , 1922) , 12-13 . 40. Doroth y Canfiel d Fisher , Self-Reliance: A Practical and Informal Discussion of Methods of Teaching Self-Reliance, Initiative and Responsibility to Modern Children (Ne w York : Henr y Hol t Co. , 1916 , revise d 1929) , 19 , 236; Fisher , Grandmother Did Not Know, 12-13 ; Fisher , Homemaker, 17441. Blake , Diary of a Suburban Housewife, 166, 219 , 41, 39, 34 , 133 , 35. 42. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , September 25 , 1924; Dushkin Papers , bo x 3, folde r 1 , October 15 , 1931 ; James W. Reed , "Th e Birt h Contro l Move ment Befor e Ro e v . Wade," Journal of Policy History 7 (1995) : 22-52 . 43. Ferri s Diary , Octobe r 10 , 1916 ; Adel e Siege l Rosenfel d record s tw o teet h filled "without pain , thank s t o N 2 o," Rosenfeld Papers , February 6 , 1936 ; T. J . Jackso n Lear s discusse s moder n intoleranc e o f pai n i n Fables of Abundance: A Cultural History of Advertising in America (Ne w York : Basic books , 1994) , 166-167 ; Leil a Secor , A Diary in Letters, Barbar a Moench Florence , ed. (Ne w York : Bur t Frankli n an d Co. , 1978) , (Apri l 4 , 1918), 170 ; Sickler Papers , January 1 6 an d 28 , 1923 . 44. Lindbergh , Hour of Gold, (Marc h 24 , 1931) , 158 ; Vincent Sheehan , Dorothy and Red (Boston : Houghto n Mifflin , 1963 ) 170 ; Wood, The Southern Mandarins, (Apri l 25 , 1932) , 106 . 45. Willi s Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 4 , Octobe r 18 , 1926 , Decembe r 192 6 un dated; [Althoug h scopolamin e ha d becom e availabl e b y th e 1914 , man y

202 Notes

to Chapter j

American wome n believe d tha t physician s wer e holding i t back fro m the m and activel y campaigne d fo r th e us e o f th e dru g i n delivery ; se e Judit h Walzer Leavitt , Brought to Bed: Birthing Women and Their Physicians in America, 1750 to 1950 (Ne w York: Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1986) , chapter 5 , 130/f. ; Dushkin Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , Octobe r 8 , 1932 . 46. Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , Octobe r 3 , 1927 ; Jessie Lloy d O'Conner , Harvey O'Conner , an d Susa n M . Bowler , Harvey and Jessie: A Couple of Radicals (Philadelphia : Templ e Universit y Press , 1988) , 58-60 ; Secor , Diary in Letters (Marc h 14 , 1919) , 187-188 ; Gordon , Southern Mandarins (June 15 , 1932) , 114 ; Sheehan, Dorothy and Red, 181-190 . 47. Littledal e Papers , box 1 , volume 10 , article drafts , undated ; bo x 1 , volume 18, Octobe r 18 , 1916 . 48. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folde r 3 , December 31 , 1936 ; Lavel l Papers , bo x 1, volume 1 , April 15 , 1928 ; Penrod Papers , March 28 , 1926 . 49. Watson , Psychological Care, 74-75 ; Blake , Diary of a Suburban Housewife, 103-104 ; Willis Papers, box 1 , volume 4 , December 2 and 22 , 1926 ; Sheehan, Dorothy and Red, 309 ; Lindbergh , Hour of Gold, (Januar y 28 , 1931), 152 ; Caro l Gilligan , In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women's Development (Cambridge , MA : Harvar d Universit y Press , 1982), 62 . Psychologica l theor y toda y seem s consistentl y t o agre e o n th e importance o f relationshi p i n th e live s of women . 50. Penro d Papers , June 14 , 1926 , Septembe r 29 , 1926 . 51. Secor , Leila Secor, 189 ; Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folde r 2 , Octobe r 15 , I93552. Gordon , Southern Mandarins, (Fal l 1931) , 88-89 . 53. Penro d Papers , Marc h 3 , 1925 , Septembe r 12 , 1925 , Octobe r 10 , 1927 , September 15 , 1928 . 54. Penro d Papers , Octobe r 30 , 1926 , Januar y 30 , 1930 , Januar y 17 , 1931 , April 19 , 1926 , May 19 , 1926 . 55. Penro d Papers , September 12 , 1925 , March 3 , 1925 , May n , 1926 . 56. Penro d Papers , Septembe r 12 , 1929 , January 17 , 1928 . During th e 1920 s social scientist s generall y moved towar d explanation s o f behavio r tha t em phasized environmen t ove r heredity . Se e Carl N . Degler , In Search of Human Nature: The Decline and Revival of Darwinism in American Social Thought (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991) , chapter 4 . 57. Penro d Papers , August 21 , 1929. 58. Ad a Har t Arlitt , The Child from One to Twelve (Ne w York : Whittlese y House, 1931) , 119-120 ; Wexberg i s discussed i n Beekman , The Mechanical Baby, 113-119 ; Penro d Papers , Ma y 25 , 1926 , Novembe r 23 , 1930 , December 11 , 1928. 59. Penro d Papers , November 23 , 1930 , May 25 , 1926 , Septembe r 12 , 192.5, December 11 , 1928.

Notes to Chapter 6 20

3

60. Arlitt , Child from One to Twelve, 214-215 ; Doroth y Canfiel d Fisher , What Grandmother Did Not Know, 245 . 61. Penro d Papers , Septembe r 12 , 1925 , January 25 , 1930 . 62. Rober t M . Mennel , "Miria m Va n Waters, " i n Barbar a Sicherma n an d Carol Hur d Green , eds. , Notable American Women: The Modern Period (Cambridge, MA: Harvar d Universit y Press , 1980) , 709-711 . 63. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , April 27 , 1933 , February 9 , 1933 . 64. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 3 , Augus t 12 , 1935 , Septembe r 2 , 1935; Estell e B . Freedman, Maternal Justice: Miriam Van Waters and the Female Reform Tradition (Chicago : Universit y o f Chicag o Press , 1996) , Maternal Justice, 13-17 . 65. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , August 25 , 1933 ; box 1 , volume 3 , October 13 , 1935 ; bo x 1 , volum e 1 , Marc h 20 , 1933 , Septembe r 27 , 1933, Ma y 2 , 1934 , January 3 , 1933 ; box 1 , volume 2 , May 10 , 1934 . 66. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 3 , September 14 , 1934 ; box 1 , volume 2, Februar y 27 , 1934 ; box 1 , volume 1 , February 8 , 1933 . 67. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , January 30 , 1934 ; box 1 , volume 3 , November 16 , 1935 . 68. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , Septembe r 4 , 1933 ; box 1 , volum e 2, Ma y 3 an d 4 , 1934 , Januar y 7 , 1934 , Septembe r n , 1935 ; bo x 1 , volume 3 , September 3 , 1935 , 63 , November 5 , 1935 .

Notes to Chapter 6 1. Raymon d Papers ; summar y o f Rut h Raymond' s lif e 1930-19 3 5 is draw n from bo x 1 , volume s 7-13 ; quot e fro m bo x 1 , volum e 13 , Septembe r 5 , 19352. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 13 , October 5 and 12 , 1935 , Decembe r 2, 1935 ; box 4 , volume 44 . 3. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , January 2 , 1930 , April 17 , 1930 ; bo x 1 volum e 13 , October 12 , 1935 . 4. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , November 4 , 1929 . 5. Margare t Bourke-White , Portrait of Myself (Ne w York: Simo n an d Schus ter, 1963) , 72 ; Lavell Papers , folder 2 , January 1 , 1931 ; lone Robinson , A Wall to Paint On (Ne w York : E . P . Dutton , 1946) , 206 ; Viol a White , Partridge in a Swamp: The Journals of Viola C. White, 1918-1941 (Tafts ville, VT: Countryma n Press , 1979) , (Novembe r 12 , 1934) , 164 . 6. An n Mari e Low , Dust Bowl Diary (Lincoln : Universit y o f Nebrask a Press), (Ma y 12 , 1933) , 84 . 7. Hard y Papers , firs t quot e fro m bo x 1 , volum e 3 , Apri l 4 , 1933 ; se e als o box 1 , volum e 2 , Apri l 14 , 193 2 an d bo x 1 , volum e 4 , Augus t 2 , 1934 ;

204 Notes

to Chapter 6

final quot e fro m bo x i , volum e 3 , July 26 , 1933 ; Harriet Louis e Hardy , Challenging Man-Made Disease (Ne w York: Praeger , 1983) , 9-10 . 8. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , volume 2 , Octobe r 10 , 1932 , Februar y 18 , 1933 ; Goff Papers , bo x 1 , annotations fo r 1992 , 4-5 . 9. L a veil Papers, folder 3 , October 8 , 1933 . 10. Joh n Modell , Into One's Own: From Youth to Adulthood in the United States, i^io-i^yj (Berkeley : Universit y o f Californi a Press , 1989) , 131 ; Robert S . Lyn d an d Hele n Merrel l Lynd , Middletown in Transition: A Study in Cultural Conflicts (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e an d Co. , 1937 , 1965), 260 , 261. 11. Modell , Into One's Own, 128 ; Low, Dust Bowl Diary, 34 , 66. 12. Dougla s A . Thorn, Normal Youth and Its Everyday Problems (Ne w York : D. Appleton-Centur y Co. , 1932) , 60-61 . 13. Doroth y Dunba r Bromle y an d Florenc e Haxto n Britten , Youth and Sex: A Study of 1300 College Students (Ne w York : Harpe r an d Brothers , 1938) , 1314. Rosenfel d Papers , folde r 1 , Apri l 6 , 1936 , Weddin g Invitation , Lyn d an d Lynd, Middletown in Transition, 149 , 179 . 15. Doroth y Blake , The Diary of a Suburban Housewife (Ne w York : Willia m Morrow, 1934) , 40-41 . 16. Modell , Into One's Own, 127 ; Willia m H . Chafe , The Paradox of Change: American Women in the Twentieth Century (Ne w York : Oxfor d University Press , 1991) , 101 ; White, Partridge in a Swamp, 140 ; Penro d Papers, letter fro m Jame s Nelso n t o Glady s Bel l Penrod, July 20 , 1933 . 17. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , October 13 , 1932 . 18. Willi s Papers , bo x 2 , volum e 10 , 1928 ; Hardy , Challenging Man-Made Disease, 24-25 . 19. Estell e B. Freedman, Maternal Justice: Miriam Van Waters and the Female Reform Tradition (Chicago : University o f Chicag o Press, 1996), 160 , 2 1 3214; mentio n o f slee p problem s als o appear s throughou t notebooks , Va n Waters Papers . 20. Gof f papers , bo x 1 , folder 1 , background notes . 21. Kare n Nolen-Hoeksma , "Se x Difference s i n Unipola r Depression : Evi dence an d Theory, " Psychological Bulletin 10 1 (1987) : 259-282 ; Jessi e Bernard, "Homosocialit y an d Femal e Depression, " Journal of Social Issues 3 2 (1976) : 213-235 ; E . Wexberg , "Zu r Klini k un d Pathogenes e de r leichten Depressionszugustande, " Zeitschrift fur die gesamte Neurologie und Psychiatrie 11 2 (1928) : 549-574 , report s th e sam e rati o fo r admis sions t o a hospita l i n German y i n 1928 ; Frances M . Culbertson , "Depres sion an d Gender : A n Internationa l Review, " American Psychologist 5 2 (January 1997) : 25-31; Howar d C . Warren, ed., Dictionary of Psychology (New York: Houghton Mifflin , 1934) , 73.

Notes to Chapter 6 20

5

22. Lavel l Papers , folder 2 , January 17 , 1932 ; folder 3 , June 28 , 1935 . 23. Stanle y Coben , Rebellion Against Victorianism: The Impetus for Cultural Change in 1910s America (Ne w York : Oxfor d Universit y Press , 1991) , i n ; Chafe , Paradox of Change, 28-31 ; Freedman , Maternal Justice, chapter 12 ; V. F . Calverton an d Samue l D . Schmalhausen , The New Generation: The Intimate Problems of Modern Parents and Children (New York: Th e Macaule y Co. , 1930) , 587 . 24. Penro d Papers , Februar y 9 , 1925 , Februar y 17 , 1927 ; Viol a White , Partridge in a Swamp (Januar y 4 , 1931) , 118 . 25. Lind a Rosenzweig , The Anchor of My Life: Middle-Class American Mothers and Daughters, 1880-1920 (Ne w York : Ne w Yor k Universit y Press , 1993), chapter 9 . 26. Hardy , Challenging Man-Made Disease, 20 , 23 ; Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volume 4 , December 16 , 1934 . 27. Dushki n Papers , bo x 3 , folder 2 , Octobe r 9 , 1932 . 28. Charle s Morgan , The Fountain (Ne w York : Knopf, 1932) , 12-83 . 29. Eilune d Lewis , "Charle s Lanbridg e Morgan, " Dictionary of National Biography, 1951-1960, E . T. William s an d Hele n M . Palmer , eds . (Oxford : Oxford Universit y Press , 1971) , 748-749 ; Percy Hutchinson , " A Nove l o f Great Distinction, " New York Times, Jun e 5 , 1932 ; Hendrik Wille m Va n Loon, "Prisoner' s Love, " Saturday Review of Literature (Ne w York : Sat urday Revie w Associates) , Jun e 4 , 1932 , 767-768 ; Emil y Newel l Blair , "Emily Newel l Blai r Name s Som e Notabl e Book s Yo u Shoul d Rea d Thi s Summer," Good Housekeeping 9 5 (Augus t 1932) : 144-145 . 30. Ann e Morro w Lindbergh , Hour of Gold, Hour of Lead: Diaries and Letters of Anne Morrow Lindbergh, 1929-193 2 (Ne w York : Harcour t Brac e Jovanovich, 1973) , (Jun e 21 , 1932), 280 ; (Augus t 21 , 1932), 305-306 . 31. Willi s Papers , bo x 2 , volume 10 , June 193 5 an d Augus t 26 . 32. Hard y Papers , bo x 1 , volume 2 , September 6 , 1932 . 33. Lavel l Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 3 , Decembe r 25 , 193 2 an d Octobe r 12 , 1932. 34. Va n Water s Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , Februar y 8 , 1933 ; Dushkin Papers , box 3 , volum e 2 , Januar y 26 , 1931 , Februar y 11 , 1931 , Februar y 23 , 1932; Penrod Paper s Septembe r 3 , 1929 . 35. Charle s Morgan , The Fountain, 49 ; inscriptio n i n Raymon d Papers , bo x 1, volume 13 . 36. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 1 , February 2 2 an d 18 , 1925 . 37. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 3 , Septembe r 28 , 1927 ; bo x 1 , volum e 4, January 14 , 1928 , November 11 , 1927. 38. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 3 , Octobe r 12 , 1927 ; bo x 1 , volum e 4 , December 30 , 1928 ; box 1 , volume 7 , January 2 , 1930 , February 2 , 1930 . 39. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 7 , Februar y 2 , 1930 , April 17 , 1930 .

2o6 Notes

to Chapter 6

40. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume 13 , July 2 , 1935 ; Culloden refer s t o th e final defea t o f th e Highlan d Jacobites . 41. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 13 , Augus t 26 , 1935 , Septembe r 12 , 1935, Augus t 31 , 1935. 42. Raymon d Papers , box 1 , volume 6 , July 1 , 1929 ; box 1 , volume 7, January 9, 1930 ; box 1 , volume 13 , October 5 , 1935 . 43. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volume s 13 , August 1935-Marc h 1936 ; bo x 1 , volume 7 , Apri l 17 , 1930 ; bo x 1 , volum e 1 , Februar y 17 , 1925 ; bo x 1 , volume 13 , August 17 , 1935 . 44. Raymon d Papers , bo x 1 , volum e 8 , Octobe r 1 3 an d 14 , 1930 ; bo x 1 , volume 12 , November 1 , 1934 . 45. Raymon d Papers , box 4 , volumes 42-44 .

Index

Adolescence, 20 . See also Yout h cultur e Advertising: and beauty , 35 ; eroticizatio n of, 70 ; and instinctua l needs , 69; an d marriage, 92 ; as shaper o f emotions , 8 9, 1 4 Alcott, William, 9 0 Amusement parks , 2 7 Anger, 2 Arlitt, Ada Hart , 123 , 130, 143 , 14 4 Automobile, 27-2 8 Baker, S . Josephine, 5 8 Beam, Lur a Ella , 54 , 68 , 70, 72, 73, 76, 81,98 Beauty, cultura l source s of , 35-3 7 Berman, Louis , 24 , 69 Biedernolf, William, 1 Birth control , 92, 9 8 Blair, Emily Newell, 16 2 Blake, Dorothy, 133-134 , 138 , 139 , 15 6 Blanchard, Phyllis , 99 Boulanger, Nadia , 22 , 71, n o Bourke-White, Margaret, 125 , 15 3 Bow, Clara , 37 , 38 , 61, 70 Brewster, Mildred , 13 0 Buck, Pearl, 21 , 104 Burgess, Ernest, 3 0 Burton, Beatrice , 8 8 Calhoun, Arthur , 15 , Calverton, V . F., 103-10 4 Career: i n conflict wit h marriage , 59 ,

68-69; opportunitie s fo r women , 5 7 58 Carnegie, Dale, 1 4 Carpenter, Edward , 72 , 9 1 Carrighar, Sally , 12 6 Carroll, Glady s Hasty , n ; confusio n about love , 62-63 , 64 ; dieting at Bates , 35-36; an d family , 127 ; and independ ence, 5 7 Carroll, Herbert , 63 , 64 Chapman, Everett , 12 5 Chase, Ilka, 38-39 , 56 , 103 , 10 4 Child rearing : an d affection , 138-139 ; conflicting trends , 134 ; criticism of , 119 120; and emotions , 130 , 143-144 ; hope s for improvemen t in , 138 ; and psychol ogy, 120 , 122 , 129 , 134 , 143 ; and regu lar schedules , 129-130 ; trends i n 1920s , 120, 129-132 ; trends i n 1930s , 132-13 4 Clapper, Oliv e Ewing , 126 , 13 0 Clapper, Ray , 12 6 Clark, Emil y Tapscott, 8 ; on love , 64 ; on modern sexuality , 22 ; on personality , 34 Companionate marriage . See Marriage , companionate Companionate Marriage (movie) , 10 3 College: preparation fo r marriage , 58 ; trends i n educatio n fo r women , 56-5 7 Consumer culture , 6-9, 21-2 2 Corelli, Marie, 78-7 9 Coue, Emile, 13 , 78 207

2o8 Index Courtship, 4; and dating , 25-26 , 28 , 6 5 66; shaped b y youth, 20 ; Victorian, 2 , 3, 19; women's rol e in, 9 2 Crawford, Joan , 15 5 Crushes, 47, 48-49, 8 2 Dancing, 2 7 Dating, 4 , 18 ; customs i n 1920s , 24 , 2 6 30, 64 ; of adul t women , 53 ; and Depres sion, 154 ; and judgmen t o f friends , 4 2 Davis, Katherine Bement , 45 , 47, 58 , 82, 155 Dell, Floyd, 66, 91-92 , 12 0 DeMille, Ceci l B., n Denishawn Dancers , 27 , 3 1 Denison, J. H. , 1 , 5 Dennett, Mar y Ware , 91 , 99 Depression (economic) , impact o n emo tional culture , 152-156 ; impact o n emo tional experience , 157 , 158 ; impact o n material welfare , 153-154 ; limits o n married women' s work , 68 , 95 Depression (psychological) , 157-15 9 Desire: ambiguity of , 70-74 , 80 ; offers am biguous guidance , 56 ; as a socia l force , 69-60 Dewey, John, 9 Di Cairano , Canio , 3 2 Dickinson, Rober t Latou , 54 , 68 , 70, 72, 76, 81,9 8 Divorce, 103 ; and consumerism , 96-97 ; a s support fo r moder n marriage , 103-105 ; trends i n 1920s , 104 , 16 0 Dix, Dorothy : o n marriage , 95 , 101 ; on modern sexuality , 24 ; on motherhood , 124 Dushkin, David , n , 46 , 110-116 , 16 1 Dushkin, Doroth y Smith : background, n o ; on dating , 28 , 29; and th e Depression , 154; and desire , 71, 72-73; o n despair , 16; on fallin g i n love , 64 ; falls i n love , 110-112; and femal e friendship , 46,161 ; and housekeeping , 139-140 ; and inne r peace, 161 ; on intens e experience , 10 ; and marrie d life , 112-116 ; on moder n sexuality, 22 ; on movies , n - 1 2 ; o n pregnancy, 135 , 135 ; and raisin g chil dren, 131 , 138; and sex , 114-115 ; on socializing, 27 ; and sports , 34 ; studies i n Paris, 67 , 71; and weight , 3 5 Dushkin, Sam , 1 1

Eastman, Max , 6 2 Eddy, Mary Baker , 13 , 78 Ellis, Havelock, 9 1 Emotional culture , 1 , 3 ; in 1920s , 14-16 ; and th e Depression , 153 ; major element s for women , 170 ; shaped b y consumer ism, 11 ; transformation of , 4 Emotional experience , 3 ; conflict wit h Vic torian standards , 18 ; of crushes , 48-49 ; of dating , 43-44 ; intensity, 2 , 9, 10 ; of motherhood, 150 ; shaped b y Depression , 157; shaped b y personal resources , 8 5 86; of singl e women, 55 ; tension wit h emotional culture , 16 , 17 0 Emotionology, 2 , 3 Emotions, management of , 79 , 102 , 13 0 Engagement, 7 6 Ewing, Jennie, 12 6 Fabian, Warner, 18 , 69-7 0 Ferguson, Hallie , 24-2 5 Ferris, Edna Claire , 121-122 , 13 5 Ferris, William, 96-97 , 121-12 2 First, Edyt h Weiner , 158 ; and dating , 40 ; on divorce , 103 ; and famil y conflict , 39 ; on pee r group , 28 , 36, 51 ; on personal ity, 38 ; on shopping , 8 Fisher, Doroth y Canfield , 7 , 136 ; on moth erhood, 132-133 , 138 , 143 , 14 4 Fitzgerald, F . Scott, 7 8 Fitzgerald, Zelda , 55 , 65 Flaming Youth, 18 , 69-70, 7 8 Flapper, 3 , 18 , 55 , 80, 8 9 Flapper wife , 88-89 , 9 2~> 95 > I O I > I O 7 Flapper Wife, The, 88 , 89 , 13 2 Florenz, Leil a Secor , 68 , 93, 136 , 13 9 Florenz, Philip, 68 , 93-9 4 Fountain, The, 161-16 5 Freud, Sigmund , 13 , 124-12 5 Frigidity, 100 , 12 3 Furry, Elda . See Hopper, Hedd a Gamble, Sara h Merr y Bradley , 34 , 5 6 Get Your Man—and Hold Him, 60 Gilman, Charlott e Perkins , 58 , 9 1 Glyn, Elinor: o n beauty , 35 ; on competi tion fo r romance , 60 ; on col d women , 81; o n huma n nature , 6% on impruden t marriage, 101 ; on "it, " 37 ; on love , 61; on motherhood , 12 4 Goff, Bet h Twiggar, 39 ; on beauty , 37 , 40;

Index 20 conflict wit h family , 40 ; 126-127; o n consumer goods , 40; crushes, 46-47, 48, 49, 82 ; and dating, 40-42; and the Depression, 154 ; and diary keeping , 157; and divorce , 104 ; and emotional depres sion, 158 ; and modern sexuality , 43, 73 ; and necking , 42-43; an d personality, 51; reflects o n emotions, 17 Goldman, Emma , 9 1 Good Housekeeping (magazine) , 65 , 96, 137 Gordon, Caroline : on childrearing, 140 ; o n danger o f childbirth, 136 ; and divorce, 104; on emotional manipulation , 15 ; on housekeeping, 136 ; on modern sexuality , 22; and weight, 3 5 Grief, 3 Groves, Ernest, 93 Haggerty, Melvin , 7 Hair, 36 , 37 Hall, Winfield Scott , 121 Hamilton, G . V.: on marriage, 89 , 95; on motherhood, 124 ; on sexual problems , 99,100 Hardy, Harrie t Louise : background, 82; begins career , 160-161 ; and camping, 34; on changing times , 21 ; and Depression, 153-154 ; and desire, 83-84 ; embraces singlehood , 85 ; and emotiona l depression, 157-158 ; finds insigh t through reading , 163 ; ideal of self, 8 283, 86 ; and love, 84-85 ; spirituality, 83, 86 Hergesheimer, Joseph, 34 Hirst, Anne , 60 , 65, 101 Holt, Luther , 129 , 13 0 Homemaker, The, 7, 132-13 3 Homosexuality, 44 , 45; out of fashion, 54; and professiona l women , 81-82 ; as stage of development , 15 5 Homosociality, 18-19 ; a n d adul t women , 153, 170 ; an d career women , 59 , 81-82; common i n 1920s , 44-46; and Doroth y Dushkin, n o , 112 , 114, 115; and emotion, 51-52 , 160-161 ; and heterosexual ity, 47; out of fashion, 54 , 155 Hopper, Hedda , 94 Hot Stuff, 7 0 Howard, Sidney , 89 , n 8-11 9 Howe, Helen, 62 , 64, 73, 12 5

9

Indiana, Pa. , 53 Intelligence, 38 , 134 Island Wives, 7 6 It (movie) , 60-61 , 62 , 70 It (a s sex appeal), 37 , 42, 44, 61 James, William, 129 Jameson, Russel l P., 25 Jastrow, Joseph, 6^ Jilted, 65 Jones, Mother, 5 8 Kent, Rockwell , 67 , 94 Key, Ellen, 91 Ku Klu x Klan , 132 Laddie, 12 1 Lavell, Martha, 136 ; on beauty, 35 ; comments o n her reading, 103 ; on effects o f the Depression , 153 , 154; gains confi dence, 67 ; on gender differences , 30 ; on homosociality, 45-46 ; on love, 61 ; on marriage, 102 ; o n modern sexuality , 23, 24, 32 ; and mother, 127 ; and mother hood, 117-118 , 138 ; on new ideas, 57; on personality , 10 ; on psychoanalysis, 14; on sense of loss, 159 Lewis, Michael, 136 Lewis, Sinclair, 7 , 63, 94, 136 Liddell, Viola Goode , 6 , 8 Life Everlasting, 78-7 9 Lindbergh, Anne Morrow : attend s college, 57 ; on child psychology , 130131, 132 ; an d dating, 29 ; finds solace in reading , 162 ; love for child, 139; on intens e experience , 10 ; on personality, 10 ; on pregnancy, 135 ; reflects o n marriage, 93 ; an d relations wit h her family, 127-128 ; self-doubt, 66-67 , *59 Lindbergh, Charles , 93, 127, 15 9 Lindbergh, Charles , Jr., 130-131 , 139 Lindsey, Ben, 70; and companionate mar riage, 102-103 , 116; o n independence of women, 6% on revolt o f youth, 21 ; on sex, 99 Littledale, Clar a Savage : on conflict o f career an d marriage, 68-69 , 137 ; confusion abou t love , 65; on desire, 72; an d high schoo l dates , 25 ; longs for mar riage, 58 , 59; and motherhood, 119,

2 i o Index Littledale, Clara Savag e (Continued) 124, 138 ; o n shopping, 8 ; and women' s work, 57-5 8 Littledale, Howard, 119 , 137 Lloyd, Jessie, 38, 103, 13 6 Love: in adolescence, 44; confusion about , 62-66; distinguishe d fro m liking , 33; falling in , 62-64; at first sight, 60 ; an d marriage, 90, 93; romantic ideal , 61; and self , 78; as transforming experience , 53, 76 , 86; Victorian view , 33 Love's Coming of Age, 7 2 Low, Ann Marie: attends college , 57 ; and changes i n early twentiet h century , 6; considers career , 68 ; and dancing, 27; and th e Depression, 153 , 155; and fam ily, 127 ; gives speech, 67 ; on love, 64; and riding , 34 Loy, Myrna, 1 2 Lumpkin, Katharin e D u Pre, 12 Lynd, Helen, 95, 156 Lynd, Robert , 95 , 96, 156 Marquand, Christina , 125 Marquand, John, 13 , 62, 64, 73, 125 Marriage: an d career, 59 , 68-69; compan ionate, 4, 90-92, 100-103 , 107, 112 114, 119 , 132, 153, 170; and consumption, 95-97 , 107 , 109; and the Depression, 156 ; and Divorce, 104-105 ; happiness o f newly wed couples , 93-94; as issue for single women, 56 , 68-69; mod ern, 3 , 89-90, 92, 94-95, 105 ; recommendations fo r fixing, 103-104 ; as replacement fo r friends, 161 ; sex before , 99; sexua l problem s in , 99-100, 108109; sexual satisfactio n in , 98-99, 124; trends i n 1920s , 58 Mayo, Elton , 102 McDougall, William, 9, 69 Mead, Georg e Herbert , 1 5 Mead, Margaret : o n college, 20 ; on homosociality, 45; on modern sexuality , 23; on Samoa n emotion , 15 Morgan, Charles , 161 Mother/daughter conflict , 122-123 , 125128 Motherhood: an d career, 136-137 ; criticism of , 118-120 , 122-125 ; modern ide als of, 117-118 , Victorian, 2-3 , 1 2 1 122; and youth culture , 122

Mothers-in-law, 12 8 Motion pictures : and beauty, 35 , 37; in Depression, 155 ; eroticization of , 70; and romance , 55 , 60; shaping emotions , 11-12

Muncie, Ind., 155 Napoli, Anna , 16 6 National America n Women' s Suffrag e Association, 58 , 137 Necking, 26 , 30, 40, 99 Nelson, James (Junior) , Jr., 74, 76 New Woman , 4 O'Shea, Michae l V., 20, 143 Parents (magazine ) 13 7 Peet, Azalia, 61 , 6 6 Penrod, Glady s Bell : attends Grov e Cit y College, 57 , 77, 78; begins diary , 53; and birt h control , 23 ; on child psychol ogy, 131 , 133, 143-44; and consumer ism, 97; and dating, 26 , 53; and the Depression, 156-157 ; and desire, 80-81 ; and divorce , 104 ; doubts abou t mar riage, 53 , 74, 76-79; and emotiona l management, 15 , 16, 144-145, 149 ; engagement, 76 ; and female friends , 160 ; and inne r peace , 163 ; on jazz, n ; an d love, 76-77 , 81 , 109; on modern sexual ity, 32 , 80; on motherhood, 132 , 139 , 142-145, 150 ; and mother-in-law, 128; and movies , 12 ; pregnancy, 140-143 ; reflects o n marriage, 89 ; and relation wit h mother, 142 ; and riding, 34 ; and self, 7 879, 86 ; and self-doubt, 15 9 Penrod, Marli n (Red) , 74, 76, 80, 97, 140, 143 Perfect Flapper, The, 78 Perkins, Frances, 58 Personality: and appearance, 37 ; as modern self , 33-34 , 69 ; and popularity, 5 1 Petting, 30-31 , 80 , 99 Philosophy of Love, The, 60 , 69 Pickford, Jack, 16 7 Pickford, Mary , 3 7 Popenoe, Paul, 60 , 101 Popularity, 18 , 28-29, 3^ , 37~39> 41-42., 44, 51-52. , 170 Powell, William, 1 2 Pregnancy, 135-136 , 140-14 3

Index 21 Pruette, Lorinne, 16 0 Psychoanalysis, 13-14 , 15-16 ; and homo sociality, 45-4 6 Quillen, Eddie, 1 2 Rawlings, Charles , 7 3 Rawlings, Marjorie Kinnan : and desire , 7 374; and divorce , 104 ; and in-laws , 128 ; on moder n sexuality , 26 ; on psychoanal ysis, 13 ; and sex , 98-9 9 Raymond, Ruth , 14 ; background, 165-166 ; and beauty , 35 ; on dating , 29 ; desires in ner peace , 165 ; diary keeping , 157 ; and emotional depression , 151 , 167; on love , 62, 166 ; on men , 64 ; on moder n sexual ity, 23 ; and movies , 12 , 168 ; and per sonality, 37-38 , 51 ; and popula r culture , 168-169; and psychotherapy , 167-168 ; on shopping , 8 Richman, Harry , 151-1 5 2, 16 8 Richmond, Winnifred , 12 3 Rivera, Diego , 62 , 9 4 Robinson, lone : and th e Depression , 153 ; and divorce , 104 ; dancing i n Paris , 27 ; falls i n love , 62 ; and marriage , 94 , 102 ; and mother , 128 ; on psychoanalysis , 14 ; pursues painting , 6 7 Rogers, Will, 16 8 Romance: an d advertising , 61 ; confusio n over, 76 ; formulas i n fiction, 61 ; as lif e goal, 153 , 170; and marriage , 60 , 92, 99, 102 ; and self , 66 Rosenfeld, Adel e Siegel : on dating , 32-33 ; delays marriage, 156 ; on hig h school , 19 ; on necking , 32 ; on pee r group , 27 , 28; and sports , 3 4 Rosenfeld, Leonard , 15 6 Roth, Lillian , 13 , 37 Sanger, Margaret , 36 , 10 1 Schmalhousen, Samuel : on marriage , 89 ; on motherhood , 123 ; on sex , 9 8 Science and Health, 7 8 Self: defined, 9 ; modern, 10 , 33; and moth erhood, 148-150 ; and psychoanalysis , 14; tentativeness of , 66-68 , 7 8 Self-Mastery through Conscious Autosuggestion, 7 8 Sennett, Mack, 12 , 7 6 Separate spheres : as suppor t o f Victoria n

1

culture, 2 ; and Victoria n marriage , 9 0 91 Sexuality: o f adolescent s i n 1920s , 20 , 2 2 24, 26 , 30-33 ; an d conflic t wit h Victo rian standards , 43; confusion about , 7 0 71; heterosexualit y i n 1920s , 54 ; research on , 70 ; and th e singl e woman , 54 Shaw, Ann a Howard , 5 8 Sheldon, William, 3 3 Sherman, Jane: an d autosuggestion , 13 ; and desire , 71; driving o n dates , 27 ; on love, 62 ; on moder n sexuality , 22 , 23, 31-32; an d mother , 125 , 127 ; and weight, 3 5 Sickler, Harry , 2 7 Sickler, Isabell e McNelis, 27-28 , 93, 102 , 135 Silver Cord, The, 89 , n 8-119 , 122 , 124 125, 13 2 Singlehood: defined , 55 ; and flappe r image , 55-56; an d confidence , 67-6 8 Single Woman, The, 5 4 Skin, 3 6 Social performance : an d attractiveness , 18 ; and emotion , 39 ; and heterosexuality , 48 Speakes, John, 11 6 Sports, 34-3 5 Stanwyck, Barbara , 16 9 St. Denis, Ruth, 2 2 Stekel, Wilhelm, 100 , 123-12 4 Stevens, Doris, 25-2 6 Stopes, Marie, 11 4 Stratton-Porter, Gene , 12 1 Stravinsky, Igor , 1 1 Tallmadge, Norma, 3 7 Tate, Allen , 22 , 10 4 Tate, Nancy , 131 , 140 Taylor, Marion , 48 ; and appearance , 36 ; crushes, 48-49; first date , 29-30 ; an d homosexual love , 50 ; and intelligence , 38; marriage, 51 ; on moder n sexuality , 30, 50 ; and socializin g with men , 3 0 Terman, Lewis , 7 0 Therapeutic culture , 13-14 ; marginaliza tion o f women' s relationships , 55-4 6 Thomas, Norman, 16 3 Thompson, Dorothy , 7 ; falls i n love , 63; frustration an d love , 102 ; and house -

212 Index Thompson, Doroth y (Continued) keeping, 136 ; love for child, 139 ; and marriage, 94 ; on pregnancy, 135-136 ; and sports , 34 Thompson, Lori n (Tommy) , 64 , 73, 87 , 105, 106-110 , 11 6

Thousand Marriages, A , 54 Trotsky, Leon , 62 Van Loon , Hendri k Willem , 16 2 Van Waters , Miriam, 140 ; background, 145-147; and the Depression, 157 ; and emotional depression , 158 ; and emotional management , 149 ; on family con flicts, 20 ; and inner peace , 101 ; network of friends , 160 ; and riding, 34 ; on selfis h mothers, 123 ; theory o f self, 148-150 ; and Victoria n values , 147 Vassar, 5 8 Victorianism, 18 ; abandoned, 5 ; and emotion, 2 ; and romantic love , 33 ; and self, 33 Wald, Lillian , 58 Watson, John, 129 ; as advertising execu tive, 3 6; on grief, 3 ; on mother love , 122, 123 , 138; on raising children , 120, 130; on the self, 9-10; on sex, 98, 99, 100

Watson, Rosali e Rayner , 12 0 Weight, 35-3 6 Weld, Theodore , 5 West, Jessamyn, 7 ; on desire, 70-71 ; on

modern sexuality , 24 ; on movies, 11; travel i n Europe, 67 West, Mrs . Max, 129, 130 White, Viola: attends revival , 1,5 ; and camping, 34 ; chooses career , 67-68 ; and the Depression , 153 , 156; and femal e friend, 160 ; on ideal o f self, 66; on love, 64-65; o n 1920s , 5 Willis, Winifred: adjust s t o married life , 107; background, 105 ; breakdown of her marriage , n 5-116 ; and camp, 34; on childbirth , 136 ; on clothing, 9; and desire, 71 , 73; and diary keeping , 157; and doubt s abou t marriage , 87-88 ; and emotional experience , 157 ; and insights through reading , 162-163 ; marries, 87, 107; and modern marriage , n 5-116 ; on motherhood, 135 , 136, 138-139; secon d marriage, 116 ; and sex, 108-10 9 Yates, Elizabeth, 27 , 67; and appearance , 35-36; determine d t o write, 68 ; an d family conflict , 56 , 127; on love, 61 ; on modern sexuality , 23 ; and sports, 34 Youth culture : in conflict wit h family , 39; and courtship , 65-66 ; and the Depression, 155 ; forces shaping , 21 ; formed i n high school , 19 ; intelligence an d attractiveness, 38 ; and mother-daughter con flict, 122 ; as new phenomenon, 17-18 ; in nineteent h century , 19 ; and peer judg ments, 42-43; shapin g emotions , 51-52 ; and socia l performance, 4 4

About the Authors

John Spurloc k i s Associat e Professo r o f Histor y a t Seto n Hil l College . His first boo k wa s Free Love: Marriage and Middle-Class Radicalism in America, 1825-1860. Hi s Ph.D . is from Rutger s University . Cynthia Magistr o i s Professo r o f Psycholog y a t Seto n Hil l College . Sh e is a license d psychologis t wit h a backgroun d i n phenomenologica l psy chology an d behaviora l medicine . Sh e receive d he r Ph.D . i n clinica l psychology fro m Duquesn e University .

213