Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning: A Narrative-Oriented Approach 9781783093823

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Table of contents :
Contents
Acknowledgements
Overview of the Research
Researcher’s Background
1. Introduction
2. Theoretical Frameworks
3. Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions
4. The Research Design
5. Sayaka’s and Maki’s Stories: Authenticate and Strengthen L2 Possible Selves
6. Megumi’s and Yui’s Stories: Desire to Create and Develop L2 Possible Selves
7. Hinako’s and Takehiro’s Stories: Ambivalent Desire to Create L2 Possible Selves
8. An Attempt to Weave the Threads Together
9. Conclusion and Afterword
References
Index
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Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

SECOND LANGUAGE ACQUISITION Series Editors: Professor David Singleton, University of Pannonia, Hungary and Fellow Emeritus, Trinity College, Dublin, Ireland and Dr Simone Pfenninger, University of Zurich, Switzerland This series brings together titles dealing with a variety of aspects of language acquisition and processing in situations where a language or languages other than the native language is involved. Second language is thus interpreted in its broadest possible sense. The volumes included in the series all offer in their different ways, on the one hand, exposition and discussion of empirical findings and, on the other, some degree of theoretical reflection. In this latter connection, no particular theoretical stance is privileged in the series; nor is any relevant perspective – sociolinguistic, psycholinguistic, neurolinguistic, etc. – deemed out of place. The intended readership of the series includes final-year undergraduates working on second language acquisition projects, postgraduate students involved in second language acquisition research, and researchers and teachers in general whose interests include a second language acquisition component. Full details of all the books in this series and of all our other publications can be found on http://www.multilingual-matters.com, or by writing to Multilingual Matters, St Nicholas House, 31–34 High Street, Bristol BS1 2AW, UK.

SECOND LANGUAGE ACQUISITION: 89

Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning A Narrative-Oriented Approach

Masuko Miyahara

MULTILINGUAL MATTERS Bristol • Buffalo • Toronto

Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data A catalog record for this book is available from the Library of Congress. Miyahara, Masuko, author. Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning: A NarrativeOriented Approach/ Masuko Miyahara. Second Language Acquisition: 89 Includes bibliographical references and index. 1. English language – Study and teaching – Japanese speakers.  2. English language – Study and teaching – Japanese students. 3. Emotive (Linguistics) – Japan. 4. Ethnicity – Japan.  5. Second language acquisition – Japan.  I. Title. PE1130.J3M54 2015 428.007’052–dc23 2015007891 British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data A catalogue entry for this book is available from the British Library. ISBN-13: 978-1-78309-381-6 (hbk) Multilingual Matters UK: St Nicholas House, 31-34 High Street, Bristol BS1 2AW, UK. USA: UTP, 2250 Military Road, Tonawanda, NY 14150, USA. Canada: UTP, 5201 Dufferin Street, North York, Ontario M3H 5T8, Canada. Website: www.multilingual-matters.com Twitter: Multi_Ling_Mat Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/multilingualmatters Blog: www.channelviewpublications.wordpress.com Copyright © 2015 Masuko Miyahara. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced in any form or by any means without permission in writing from the publisher. The policy of Multilingual Matters/Channel View Publications is to use papers that are natural, renewable and recyclable products, made from wood grown in sustainable forests. In the manufacturing process of our books, and to further support our policy, preference is given to printers that have FSC and PEFC Chain of Custody certification. The FSC and/or PEFC logos will appear on those books where full certification has been granted to the printer concerned. Typeset by R. J. Footring Ltd, Derby, UK Printed and bound in Great Britain by the CPI Book Group Ltd

Contents



Acknowledgements Overview of the Research Researcher’s Background

1

Introduction  Overview of the Enquiry: The Rationale and Aims of the Research Situating the Context of the Research English Education in Contemporary Japan: Teaching English as Communication  Diversifying Views of ‘English’  Structure of the Book 

2

viii ix xi

Theoretical Frameworks Parallels Between the Poststructuralist Account of Identity and Dewey Dewey and Language Learning: A Social Process Points of Convergence: Situated Learning, Imagined Communities and the L2 Ideal Self Creating a Discursive Space: The Ideal L2 Self and Experiential Profile Discursive Space The Ideal L2 Self in the EFL Context: The Notion of International Posture Chapter Summary  v

1 3 5 5 9 11 13 14 17 18 22 24 30 32

vi Contents

3

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions Qualitative Research  Narratives as Stories of Experiences Narratives, Emotions and the Experiential Experience  Narrative Interviews: ‘Parameters of Sensitivity’ Chapter Summary

34 34 36 44 47 49

4

The Research Design Research Design The Research Site: A Unique University  The Participants  Data Collection Analysis of the Narrative Data Constructing the Analytical Model The Analytical Model The Role of the Researcher: Some Interim Thoughts Chapter Summary

51 51 51 57 60 66 68 72 77 78

5

Sayaka’s and Maki’s Stories: Authenticate and Strengthen L2 Possible Selves Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future Chapter Summary

6

7

Megumi’s and Yui’s Stories: Desire to Create and Develop L2 Possible Selves Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences  Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future Chapter Summary Hinako’s and Takehiro’s Stories: Ambivalent Desire to Create L2 Possible Selves  Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future Chapter Summary

80 81 90 97 103 105 106 112 120 127 128 128 134 140 144

Contents vii

8

9

An Attempt to Weave the Threads Together Linking the Stories of the Six Participants: What Their Narratives Tell Us Proposing Models of Profiles Chapter Summary

147 148 162 165

Conclusion and Afterword 166 Implications for Practice  166 Some Final Thoughts on Narrative Studies 171 Limitations to the Research 179 Afterword180

References Index

182 198

Acknowledgements

There are many people who made this book possible. First and foremost, I owe a great deal of gratitude to the students who participated in the research and who shared their experiences with me. I would also like to extend my sincere appreciation to Dr David Block for his guidance and support in conducting the research. He has been very instrumental in my growth as a scholar, and has greatly inspired me with his wisdom and expertise. His knowledge of the subject never ceased to amaze me. Prominent academics have helped me shape the direction of this book. In particular, I would like to express my gratitude to Dr Ema Ushioda and Dr John Gray for their thought-provoking feedback on the initial manuscript. In fact, it was their commentary that prompted me to write this book. Much appreciation also goes to Ms Laura Longworth, the editor at Multilingual Matters, for her patience and support. Warm thanks go to my parents and family as well. Thank you for supporting every step of the journey of writing this book. Thank you all! Masuko Miyahara

viii

Overview of the Research

The purpose of this book is to shed new light on the understanding of pro­ cesses of L2-related identity construction and development among learners studying English in a foreign language context. Unlike previous language learning research on identity grounded in the poststructuralist theory, the particular feature of this study is its attempt to integrate the sociologically and the psychologically oriented perspectives of identity formation. It problematises the current dominant emphasis on the social dimension in the poststructuralist framework of identity, and calls for a more balanced approach. By focusing on English learners at higher institutions in Japan, the study highlights the instrumental agency of individuals in responding to and acting upon the social environment, and in developing, maintaining and/or reconstructing their desired identities as L2 users. In particular, the study offers unique insights into the role of experience, emotions, social and environmental affordances, and individuals’ responses to these, in shaping their personal orientations to English and self-perceptions as English learnerusers. The work includes an intricate analysis of past, present and future dimensions of individuals’ L2-related experiences and trajectories, and how these dimensions are intertwined through the process of narrative construction as participants relate their thoughts and the researcher represents and interprets their stories. An additional feature of this book is its discussion of the methodological approach that uses narrative data. While most publications focus on presenting research findings, this book focuses on narrative research practice within the context of the actual study. By relating the relevant narrative theories, it illustrates the process of data collection, analytical methods employed in the study and issues concerning representation. Furthermore, although researchers tend to focus on the success of their studies, the ‘messiness’ involved in narrative studies is discussed here, and ways to overcome such obstacles are proposed. Areas that require further deliberations in narrative ix

x  Overview of the Research

research are identified. The book concludes by calling for more recognition of the diversity of approaches to narrative studies in applied linguistics, ­approaches that embrace multiple forms and styles.

Researcher’s Background

I have included this section based on my conviction that, in narrative research, there should be more focus on the researcher. Researchers in qualitative research need to be more open about their professional as well as their personal background in order to make transparent their roles in the research. Information concerning the informants is made apparent in many of publications as a means to contextualise a study, but rarely do we find studies that present a fair account of the researcher’s background. In narrative studies in particular, there is a need to be more open in presenting the ‘overall world view’ of the researchers (Egbert & Sanden, 2014), since it will inevitably inform their research. It is my belief that in any research, whether quantitative or qualitative, it is impossible to be entirely ‘objective’ (as discussed in Chapter 9). I would therefore like to acknowledge that the findings reported in this study were interpreted through my own lens, that is, based on my own ‘conceptual framework of the world’ (Frost, 2011). This requires me to present here an account of my personal and professional experience as a language learner, a teacher and an emergent researcher.

My Trajectory as a Language Learner, Teacher and a Researcher in Two Cultures and Languages I was born in Tokyo, Japan, but spent most of my formative years overseas. My first encounter with English was when I was six years old. My father’s duties as a diplomat took us to London, where I was immersed in an English-speaking environment. I still remember the feeling of uneasiness and, at the same time, the efforts my teachers at school made to make me feel ‘at home’ in my new environment. Those first few months remain a fond memory of my childhood. I returned to Tokyo six years later only to go abroad again to New York at the age of 15, and received my education at xi

xii  Researcher’s Background

a private high school in a suburb of New York City. Having spent a year at Barnard College, Columbia University, after graduating from high school, I returned to Japan and transferred to a college in Tokyo, which happens to be the research site of this study. My experience as such is what some academics like Kanno (2003) and Block (2006a) would call the ‘returnee’ (kikokushijo) experience (see Chapter 1). My teaching career started a few years later, after I had graduated from college, in San Francisco, where I helped out in ESL classrooms at elementary and middle schools in my neighbourhood. My teaching experiences during those few years in California prompted me to pursue a graduate degree in the field of second language acquisition. Having obtained my master’s degree and, eventually, my doctorate from the Institute of Education, University College London, I returned to Tokyo, where I began my career as a teacher and researcher at the tertiary level from 2002. One phrase that would characterise my language learning experiences over the years would be ‘a roller coaster ride’ – riding on a virtual roller coaster of ups and downs in language learning experiences, identity changes and mixed emotions. Going in and out of Japan, the UK and the USA for an extended period, my language learning experience has always been trying to ‘catch up’ with either English or Japanese. At times, for various reasons, this has not been an easy experience. Parallel to my language learning endeavours, I have also noticed how my identity has changed, developed, evolved over the years. In my professional life here in Tokyo, where English is the principal language for communication with my colleagues and students, I feel fortunate that my experiences as a bilingual, bicultural person allow me to continue functioning comfortably in my present community. I hope that this brief profile of the researcher will give readers a glimpse of the ‘conceptual framework’ that my perception of the world is founded on. Revealing the researcher’s personal and professional life gives not only more transparency to the data collection and analysis, but also contributes to the ‘rigour’ of the overall research, or what Barkhuizen et al. refer to as a ‘well-crafted, subjective interpretation of data’ (2014: 89).

1 Introduction

This book seeks to examine the issue of identity construction and its implications for the process of learning a foreign language. As many researchers have argued, any discussion of ‘identity’ is fundamentally based on one’s personal experience and is inescapably subjective. This is true for me as well. My interest in this subject is, first, rooted in my background as a returnee (kikokushijo). Returnees are sons and daughters of Japanese governmental officials and business people who have lived aboard for a certain period during their childhood and adolescence before returning to Japan (Block, 2006a; Kanno, 2003). Second, my interest stems from my professional experiences as an English teacher and language educator in Japan for nearly two decades. During this time I have observed that language learning is more than a cognitive and individual phenomenon, but one that needs to be addressed from a broader perspective, to take into account the dialectic relationship between learners and their social milieu. Kanno’s now famous longitudinal study of returnees (2000, 2003) was of special and poignant interest to me. Reflecting on my experiences as a teenager attending a high school in New York three decades previously, I found that they resonated with those of Kanno’s participants, who also struggled to claim their identities in their new environments abroad, as well as upon their return to Japan. Identity issues are also at the centre of ethnographic case studies by Angelia-Carter (1997), Haneda (1997), Pierce (1995), Toohey (2000) and Willet (1995). These works have investigated the experiences of those who migrated into their new educational contexts, where themes of mainstreaming, participation and language socialisation emerged as central issues. Such studies not only informed my general under­ standing that learning a language is ‘an integral and inseparable aspect of social practice’ (Lave & Wenger, 1991: 31) but they also showed me how identity is intertwined with social and affective dimensions. Until quite recently, I held to an essentialist point of view regarding identity as a static and stable entity. However, my frequent trips to and 1

2  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

from London and Tokyo over the last decade or so have prompted me to re-evaluate my thoughts on identity from a slightly different perspective. For example, upon landing at Heathrow Airport, the first encounter on British soil is usually with immigration officers. As many foreigners arriving in London have experienced, one is required to submit to a routine set of questions, such as the purpose of one’s visit and the intended length of stay. To me, this ritual symbolises my status as an outsider and as a ‘visitor’ who does not ‘belong’ to the British community. In contrast, on my return to Japan, and in fact even as soon as I set foot in a Japanese-owned airline, I am greeted with a flight attendant’s bubbling words of welcome, ‘okaerinasai!’ The literal English translation is ‘welcome home’, but okaerinasai tends to have a special connotation, as it is used only for people who are considered to be insiders, and it carries a subtle message that one is considered to belong to that group. Such experiences at airports are of course not unique – they are shared by thousands of other Japanese people making similar journeys. However, the irony for me is that although my appearance might define me as ethnically ‘Japanese’, I am aware that some in Japan would not consider me to be truly, wholly or purely Japanese, because of my upbringing as a returnee. These contradictions would not make sense if I viewed identity as unchanging. My travels abroad, as well as my experiences of living both in and out of Japan, have thus influenced me to change my understanding of identity, which I now perceive as fluid, dynamic and multifaceted. This broadened understanding of identity motivated me to reflect on the issue of identity with students who are studying English at a liberal arts college in Japan. Observing the struggles these students undergo during their first year of college, I discovered that the difficulty was not only to do with language, but was also linked to the changes in their sense of self. In class and during tutorials, I noticed that their emotional responses in learning a language figured prominently in their perceptions of themselves. This stirred my interest in examining how emotions influence the construction of identity. However, I am interested not only in what kinds of identities develop, but also in how, why and in what contexts the students construct their identities and, furthermore, how the affective dimensions of learning a language are implicated in this process. In particular, I focus on learners’ experiences by examining what the learners themselves present to me. This study, therefore, takes a participant-relevant perspective, where the aim is to investigate learners’ language learning experiences from their perspective. Research in this field should not be limited to presenting an account of participants’ experience, but should also clearly show how the learners themselves perceive and articulate these experiences. For this reason, I decided to work within a qualitative paradigm; more specifically, I adopted a narrative-oriented approach to explore the process of the construction of identities of Japanese learners studying English within higher education in Japan.

Introduction 3

Overview of the Enquiry: The Rationale and Aims of the Research Prioritising a more socially oriented approach in the conceptualisation of second language acquisition (SLA) is not new. It was explored as far back as the 1960s (Lafford, 2007; Swain & Deters, 2007), even if for many years there was no overt conflict between what we might call in very general terms cognitive versus social approaches to second language learning. However, with the publication of Firth and Wagner’s landmark article in 1997, the social perspective to second language learning gained prominence. A large number of studies that include the social and contextual dimensions have since emerged in SLA and language learning research. These studies have paved the way for researchers to draw upon a wide range of disciplines and include various theoretical perspectives in their work (Block, 2003). One example is Firth and Wagner’s article (2007) where their expanded understanding of ‘learning’ is presented, where learning is framed as a social process. They contend that the central tenet for making the distinction between the ideas of language ‘acquisition’ and ‘use’ emerges from one’s conception of learning. Drawing on Lave and Wenger (1991: 807), they view the process of learning as an ‘inseparable part of ongoing activities, situated in social practice and social interaction’. Language learning is regarded as a situated activity in a specific context, where the participants ‘engage in complex, multimodal, finely tuned co-participation, integrating body posture, gaze, verbal and prosodic activities, rhythm, and pace in their choreography of action’ (Egbert et al., 2004, quoted in Firth & Wagner, 2007: 807). From this broader notion, it is a short step to see why identity has come to be seen as a key element in understanding language learning. Framing language learning as a social process implies that there is a struggle for participation in a new social environment (Pavlenko & Lantolf, 2000). The process involves a host of sociocultural and contextual factors that preclude discussions of subjectivity, agency and multiple identities. Learning a second language through participation is thus an emergent process where constructs such as agency, voice, power and control intermittently intertwine with societal structure. Grounded in such an understanding of second language learning, I attempt in this study to develop a conceptual framework and practical understanding of the process of identity construction of learners of English as a foreign language. The research focuses on tracing the identity development of the focal students by obtaining first-hand accounts of their learning experiences through talks with the participants. The stories of their learning endeavours are complemented and triangulated with other methods, such as their monthly journals, as they complete a one-year intensive programme in EAP (English for as academic purposes) in their first year at a Japanese

4  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

university in Tokyo. The observations show how learners strive to create their own English learning communities, enhance their feelings of belonging (or the opposite) in these learning communities and, in effect, experience changes in their self-identities. The study examines how learning a language involves subjective experiences in which emotions (both positive and negative) and identities are involved. The main research question addressed is as follows: How is the affective dimension implicated in the construction of the identity of a language learner? There were consequently four broad areas of enquiry (Box 1.1). These were based on the findings of a pilot study.

Box 1.1  The four broad areas of enquiry in the study (1) The learners and their past English language learning experiences • What have been their English language learning experiences? • What kind of affective relationship have learners formed with the English language in the process of learning it? • How do they make sense of these experiences in descriptive and evaluative terms? (2) The learners’ relationship and orientation to English • How do learners see the English language (e.g. as language for work; as a language for travel or entertainment, etc.)? • Do learners feel the target language to be ‘foreign’ to them? • Do learners see themselves as learners of the language, or users, or both? • What kind of affective states do learners ascribe to the process of learning English? (3) The learners’ views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future • How do learners view themselves as English-users over time and in different contexts? • What affective factors have shaped their views? • How do students view their identity within their current institution? • To what extent do they see or sense any conflict between the communities of which they are members? • How do students imagine themselves using English in the future, and what kinds of English do they see themselves using? (4) How does this affect their identities as learners?

Introduction 5

Situating the Context of the Research In the next section of this chapter, I will first present a brief overview of English education in contemporary Japan to offset out the context of the research. This information is necessary to contextualise the experiences of the six participants in this study. First, I will describe the major developments in language education in the past two decades, to provide a general picture of how Japanese learners study English in contemporary Japan. The aim here is to sketch out the trajectory of learners. The highly government-controlled nature of language education in the Japanese school system makes it unavoidable that I include general insights from language policy studies. An examination of how the English language is conceptualised at the policy level provides insights into how policies are translated into curriculum and classroom practices. These, in turn, may influence how learners perceive the language and their language learning. Second, I will outline how English is conceptualised in current Japanese society, as this informs the relationship that people have with the language. People’s desire to study a language is often closely related to how they perceive the language and what its function and affordances are. Thus, the reasons why individuals wish to learn a language are not only personal constructions but can also be framed by public discourse about the language, which often reflects a broader framework of politics and ideology (Fujita-Round & Maher, 2008; Tsui & Tollefson, 2007). As Phillipson (1992) and Pennycook (1994) argue, language education does not operate in a social vacuum. There is a complex interplay between social, political and economic ‘macro’ events (both on a domestic level and from a global perspective) that has an impact upon ‘micro’ events at a local level. Such an outlook is important to the study since, as I will attempt to illustrate in later chapters, how learners visualise their future selves is influenced by global forces (as, indeed, are their past and present selves).

English Education in Contemporary Japan: Teaching English as Communication English language teaching can be located in three major educational networks: school networks, private language schools (including private tutoring) and courses established by business and other organisations (Maravoka, 2004). The current focus on globalisation and the recent introduction of English education at the elementary level have pushed many parents to send their children to private language schools from a very early age (Katsuyama et al., 2008). Indeed many of my participants in this study

6  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

were exposed to English from infancy. However, under the current Japanese education system, the majority of Japanese children begin to study English ‘formally’1 in junior high school, and continue for a further three years in high school before entering college. Since my participants were 18–20 years of age around the time of our interviews, I focus on two developments during the last two decades: the introduction and implementation of communicative language teaching (CLT); and the proposal to make English an official second language in Japan. The questions that are of particular interest for this study are: (1) What kind of language education have the students been exposed to? (2) How does it relate to their view of English?

Communicative language teaching (CLT) in Japan As noted above, English language education in the school network is highly government controlled. National standards for the school curriculum for each of three school levels (elementary, lower and upper secondary) are laid down in the Course of Study prescribed by the Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology (MEXT, the official abbreviation of the Ministry). The Course of Study provides the basic framework for school curricula, including the objectives and contents of teaching in all subjects, and is mandatory for all schools, both private and public. The Course of Study was first issued by the Ministry of Education in 1947, and it is revised every 10 years or so, in line with amendments in governmental policies, which are often in response to societal changes, both domestic and inter­ national. The two reforms that are of relevance to this study are the Reform Acts of 1989 and 2002. These are considered to contain the most important innovations for English language education in modern Japan (Lamie, 2005; Makarova, 2004). The 1989 Reform Act coincided with the communicative approach in the wider TESOL world (Brumfit & Johnson, 1979; Littlewood, 1981). For the first time in the history of Japanese foreign language education, the word ‘communicative’ appeared in the Course of Study, and it underscored that the goal for both junior high school and high school English was to ‘understand a foreign language’, to ‘develop a positive attitude to want to communicate in a foreign language’ and to ‘develop the basis for inter­ national understanding’ (Yoshida, 1999). The government’s determination to develop practical communicative competence is further illustrated by the instigation of the JET (Japan Exchange and Teaching) programme, where each year the Japanese government invites over 5000 people from all over the world as Assistant Language Teachers (ALT) to assist in English instruction in secondary schools (Borg, 2008). The 1989 Reform Act also officially introduced oral communication courses in high schools (Kunieda, 2000;

Introduction 7

Lamie, 2005). In conjunction with the 2002 Reform Act, MEXT announced an Action Plan in 2003 to further promote this communicative focus by stating that its main aim was to produce proficient English speaking citizens who could function effectively in the current globalised world. The 2003 Action Plan presented a set of strategic national goals: (1) the formal introduction of English at the elementary school level; (2) the implementation of the ‘Super English High Schools’ programme (which places emphasis on not only English language studies but also English-medium study of non-English subjects); (3) an ongoing reform of the higher education system in Japan; (4) a wide-ranging teacher training programme for all junior and senior high school teachers. However, the communicative model initiated by the government does not appear to have been successful, as both academics and the general public are dubious as to whether the government’s policy has produced the intended outcome (see for example Kunieda, 2000; Murphey & Carpenter, 2008). It is beyond the scope of this study to analyse in detail the many cited reasons for the supposed failure, but a brief examination of the matter offers an interesting insight into how Japanese learners view both English and their language learning. A considerable amount of research has shown that the perceived lack of success in producing competent English-users is largely due to the difficulties teachers have experienced in implementing the policies. These policies stem from specific beliefs about language teaching that are deeply rooted in the nation’s sociocultural traditions of learning (Borg, 2008; Brown & Wada, 1998; Gorsuch, 2000, 2001; Koike & Tanaka, 1995; LoCastro, 1996; McGroarty & Taguchi, 2005; Miyahara, 2002; Oka & Yoshida, 1997; Sato, 2002; Taguchi, 2005; Takeuchi, 2003; Wada, 2002). In order to explore the complexities of implementing CLT in the classroom, Taguchi (2005) documented the characteristics of oral communi­ cations classes at several high schools in one prefecture. Survey responses from 92 high school teachers showed that the most typical classroom activities were listening drills and practice at dialogue. Activities for negotiating meanings or creative expressions (e.g. giving speeches, presentations) were minimal. Ninety-three per cent of the teachers reported that the language used to give instructions was mainly Japanese. Taguchi also observed four oral communication classes, which revealed the following: the teacher provided most of the input (48–74% of class time); the teacher guided all classroom activities; students spoke for only 15% of the class time, and this usually involved choral repeating of dialogues; the use of the ‘fill in the gap’ type of listening exercises was frequently observed. Given these findings, it is obvious that teachers do not have a good understanding of the communicative teaching style (Miyahara, 2002; Wada, 2002).

8  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Gorsuch (2000, 2001), furthermore, observes yet another impediment to the implementation of CLT, and documents how the college entrance exams and grammar-oriented exams have influenced teaching practices. Meanwhile, Pacek (1996) has described how difficult it is for teachers to change their traditional practices even after receiving training in communicative methods. From a slightly different angle, another neglected educational issue that requires examination is that English textbooks need authorisation by the Japanese government. The authorised textbooks were in fact found to provide only partial support for the development of communicative abilities, despite their claims to provide full support (McGroarty & Taguchi, 2005; Miyahara, 2002). Ideological differences in the concept of ‘communication’ are also understood to be related to the perceived failure to implement CLT (LoCastro, 1996; Savignon, 2003). Thus, under such circumstances, English tends to be regarded more as a school subject than as a ‘communicative tool’. For most students, English has no relevance to their daily life. Beyond the walls of their schools, English is regarded as something symbolic or unreal that is most often devoid of any functional meaning. Such views are exemplified in Kikuchi and Browne’s (2009) studies conducted with high school students. Their study reports on the impact of the above reform of classroom pedagogy from the learners’ point of view, collected shortly after their admission into higher education. It is also interesting to note that, in contrast to the above observations, efforts to promote communicative competence have been pursued more successfully in the private sphere. This can be seen in the surge of language schools and also of the ‘home tutoring’ systems produced by major publishing companies.2 These increased dramatically, largely in response to the government’s initiative to introduce English at the elementary level. Further­more, in the past several years, Japan has also seen a rise in the number of programmes designed for language instruction on commercial Japanese television (Moody, 2006). These programmes have been successful in presenting a specific language structure in an entertaining manner. Viewers are given the impression that learning English is fun, exciting, easy and useful, in contrast to an exam-oriented approach. Most of the participants in the present study attended classes managed by the private sector prior to the start of formal English education in junior high school. As will be shown, their experiences at privately managed schools helped them to frame English as a communicative tool, rather than a school subject.

The issue of English as an official second language The move to make English an official second language represented an interesting and relevant addition to how the learners perceive English and their language learning endeavours. This was in fact a very controversial issue that generated strong negative responses, and the idea never took

Introduction 9

hold in Japanese society. But what is interesting is what the proponents of this proposal had advocated. Understanding English to be an international language, they claimed that studying English should be framed within Japanese culture. Specifically, English should be learned for the purpose of promoting the Japanese language and culture to the rest of the world (Maher, 2006). Hashimoto described the prevailing official attitude as ‘deconstructing English, a process in which English is adopted only as a tool so that the values and traditions embedded in the Japanese culture will be retained and cultural independence will be ensured’ (Hashimoto, 2007; cited in Stewart & Miyahara, 2011: 27). As Maher (2007: 15) has succinctly summarised, ‘the logic of internationalization in the Japanese context might mean educating Japanese people to be Japanese, and merely equipping them with the linguistic armor to compete outside of Japan’. In such a situation, individuals may not strive to attain native-like proficiency, nor wish to belong to the target community; instead, they may be satisfied with a level of English that is sufficient to hold basic conversations. Such individuals tend to value the process of learning the language (Allen & Sakamoto, 2006) more than high proficiency.

Diversifying Views of ‘English’ Learners’ perceptions of the target language have a great impact on the reasons why they want to study the language, which, in turn, influence how they position themselves in relation to the target language. The public’s view of English is currently in a transitional stage in Japan (Gottlieb, 2005; Hino, 2009; McKenzie, 2010). Until quite recently, Japanese impressions of English have been simple and unitary: one that is based on ideas of the ‘inner circle’ norm, where one’s goal in the target language is the Anglo-American standard. However, an increasing awareness among the Japanese of Japan as a multilingual3 country is bringing changing this conceptualisation (Hino, 2009). Against this backdrop, a discussion of the kind of English that is at stake becomes a more pertinent issue to explore in this study. The prestige and akogare4 (longing or desire) associated with English remain dominant in Japanese views on English. Ever since the first recorded contact between the Japanese and the English language in 1600, when the Englishman William Adams landed in Kyushu, knowing English has been associated with a certain privileged status within Japanese society (FujimotoAdamson, 2006; Ike, 1995). In association with the elevated status of the Western world, and European and Anglo-American cultures in particular, knowledge of British Standard English or American Standard English carries with it the prospect of belonging to a privileged sector of society. To the younger generation in particular, it is considered ‘cool’ (Maher, 2005) to be a fluent English speaker. The presumed high status of English in Japanese

10  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

society and the akogare towards the language is also often linked with social mobility. In magazine advertisements for programmes of study abroad targeted at high school and college students, for instance, we often see the rhetoric like ‘fulfil your dreams’, ‘life-changing experience’, ‘become the person you always wanted to be’ (Seargeant, 2011).5 The implication here is that English is a catalyst for empowerment and self-realisation. It appears the akogare and prestige that Anglo-American English once enjoyed is now at the dawn of a major transition. The concepts of world Englishes, English as an international language (EIL), English as a lingua franca (ELF) and global English (Jenkins, 2007) have contributed to changing how English is currently understood in Japan. There are several contentions as to how these notions should be regarded in terms of English language teaching and learning in Japan (a subject that is beyond the scope of this study), but one fact is certain: views of English are becoming more diversified and varied. In addition, with the increasing number of foreign residents in recent years, which amounts to over 2 million (Ministry of Justice, 2008; Yamamoto, 2007), many Japan people have been exposed to a variety of Englishes without even having to go abroad, and they are experiencing at first hand the notion that Anglo-American Standard English is not the only English. The diminution of the monolithic view of English has resulted in an ambivalent attitude towards that language (Hino, 2009), and it is becoming problematic to find a common ‘English’ that is suitable as a model. Further­ more, it is becoming increasingly difficult to equate English ability with good career prospects, as evident from surveys conducted by ALC (Associated Liberal Creators) in 2003 on college students about to graduate. ‘We don’t necessarily land a job because of our English abilities as we did in the past’, lamented one (Seargeant, 2009: 116). One of the implications of this discussion that is of interest to this study is how learners’ changing views of English might affect their learning, which in turn might have an effect in forging their identities. Broadly speaking, there appears to be two major views of English in present-day Japan (Hino, 2009; Yano, 2011). The first is the enduring ‘inner circle’ perception of English, where one’s goal in the target language is the Anglo-American Standard. In this case, linguistic competence plays a central role in learners’ conceptualisation of learning English. The other is what might be termed the indigenous view, that is, learners understand English from a wider perspective, by framing it as an international language. For learners in the latter group, more emphasis is placed on engagement with the learning process itself. Both are valid reasons for engaging with English education. Nonetheless, there are bound to be differences in the ways Japanese students approach their learning, and this will ultimately affect their language proficiency. An important implication here is that the attitudes, impressions or views that one has of English can be seen as a way of expressing ideas of self-identity. For instance, Megumi, one of my participants, clearly demonstrated her

Introduction 11

identity as ‘Japanese’ when she stated that she wished to introduce Japan to the world rather than to identify herself with the target culture: ‘English is valuable to me because I want to introduce Japan and the Japanese culture to people all over the world. In fact, that’s my main reason for studying English.’ One’s outlook on English therefore has a crucial impact on the meaning of learning English, which may then influence the process of identity construction.6

Structure of the Book This chapter has outlined the main research questions and has framed the context of this study. The following chapter examines the literature on identity from a broadly poststructuralist perspective in order to provide the rationale for study’s theoretical and methodological approach. I argue that although identity is a social positioning, it is necessary to widen the current poststructuralists’ take on identity to incorporate the psychologically oriented dimensions of an individual’s experience to obtain a more balanced view of identity. In the third chapter I describe the broad research methodology and in the fourth chapter I detail of the study design in terms of site, participants, and data collection and analysis. In the three chapters that follow, I present the data from each of the six study participants, and discuss their significance in terms of the main research questions. Chapter 8 then presents a cross-analysis of the findings from the data obtained from each of the participants. In the concluding chapter, I attempt to draw together the major findings of the study, to assess what has been achieved, to acknowledge the limitations of the study, and to discuss the pedagogical implications of what has been learned, in order to propose directions for further research.

Notes (1) I say ‘formally’ here since, when my participants would have been attending element­ ary school, English (or any other foreign language) was introduced in the classroom as a new addition to the ‘Period of Integrated Studies’. Schools were given choices when introducing this system and some elected to implement English language programmes. However, in April 2010, the Period of Integrated Studies was officially abolished by the government, and since April 2012 English has been mandatory for all fifth- and sixth-graders. (2) Examples are ALC (Associated Liberal Creators), a publishing firm that specialises in language learning resources, and Bennesse, one of the major publishing companies in Japan; and the eikaiwa (English conversation) schools, which are a multi-billion dollar industry in Japan (McKenzie, 2010). (3) As Maher (2008) has pointed out, some argue that it is a misconception to consider Japan a monolingual and monocultural nation. Many studies show that Japan has been for many centuries multilingual and multicultural, but it is only recently that

12  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

the general public has come to acknowledge the fact (Gottleib, 2005; Kanno, 2004; Maher, 2006; Sugimoto, 2009; Tollefson, 2008). (4) The literally meaning of akogare is ‘longing’. In their critical ethnographic study of Japanese women studying English in Australia, Piller and Takahashi (2006) translate this as ‘desire’, as in the phrase ‘Japanese women’s discourse of desire for the West’. (5) There appears to be a transition in the akogare that Japanese students have towards studying abroad. The Wall Street Journal (18 November 2010) reported that the number of Japanese students going to the USA to study had dropped (14% less in 2008; 15% less in 2009). Various reasons were attributed to this phenomenon, such as double tuition and the job-hunting situation in Japan. The Manichi Daily News (5 January 2011) similarly reported a decrease in the number of students studying overseas, claiming that ‘Japanese young people’s perceived turn against studying abroad [is largely due to an] increasingly inward-looking attitude’. This was further supported by an article that appeared in the Nihon Keizai Shinbun (5 December 2011), a leading Japanese newspaper with a wide circulation among business people. Such reports led the government to provide financial support to universities that get their students to study abroad (MEXT, 2011). (6) Discussing the relationship between English and globalisation, Yamagami and Tollefson (2011) contend that the concept of globalisation in Japan can be largely divided into two discourses: globalisation-as-opportunity and globalisation-asthreat. Tensions that can have effect on learners’ perceptions of English always exist between these two lines of thinking.

2 Theoretical Frameworks

The purpose of this chapter is to present the disciplinary foundations of the study of identity in language learning research. Following recent trends in this field, identity in this study is grounded in a social constructivist and poststructuralist discourse (e.g. Norton, 2000, 2013; Pavlenko, 2001). However, I problematise the current dominant emphasis on the social dimension of identity in the poststructuralist framework, and call for a more balanced approach to this subject by arguing that the analysis of identity formation should be complemented with a psychologically oriented perspective. I believe that identities are not merely products of one’s response to the environment, but are also conditioned by, and from, what individuals bring into their interactions within a certain discourse. Identity is thus forged by personal experience and interactions with an ‘other’. Of particular interest to the present study is the role of narrative in the meaning-making process of human experience. How do the participants in my study make connections between separate events? How does one experience lead to another and, most importantly, what identities do they develop in telling their stories (Dewey, 1938, 1997)? We shall see in the chapters to follow that narrative is an effective vehicle to represent the intricate interplay of the internal state of the learner as well as the social context. In the following section I will summarise approaches to the concept of identity rooted in the poststructuralist discourse and how that concept has come to be regarded as a key construct in the field of second language acquisition and language learning research. I will then discuss identity in terms of L2 language learning, with particular reference to Dewey’s theory of experience (Dewey, 1938) and the situated nature of learning (Lave & Wenger, 1991), wherein the socially constructed nature of experience is a central tenet. Dewey’s understanding of experience has particular relevance, since the main focus of this research is to probe the experiential nature of learners’ learning histories and their impact on their present and 13

14  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

future learning. I will then examine the concept of imagined communities (Anderson, 1991; Hall, 1990; Kanno, 2008; Norton, 2000) and the notion of possible selves (Markus & Nurius, 1989) as relevant theoretical frameworks to close the gap between the social and the psychological understanding of identity formation. In particular, I draw on the studies of Dörnyei’s L2 possible self (2005, 2009) and Yashima’s notion of international posture (2002) as approaches that might broaden the current notion of identity to one that includes what individuals bring into their interactions within a particular discourse, in addition to the social dimensions of identity.

Parallels Between the Poststructuralist Account of Identity and Dewey The sociocultural perspective in second language acquisition gained prominence in both theory and practice from the early 1990s. In particular, the issue of how identity and agency function in the process of learning a second language has attracted much interest. The key concept in the poststructuralist notion of identity is that meaning and identity are not fixed, but are constantly evolving through social discourses and practices. In contrast, the essentialist notion is that individuals have a stable and unified identity that is separate from the social context. Poststructuralists understand identity to be far more complex and dynamic, conceptualising it as constructed and co-constructed through the activities in which individuals engage. For instance, in my case, in the course of a single day, my identity can shift from being a mother, a wife, a university lecturer, a researcher, a doctoral student and a colleague at work. In different situations with different interlocutors, we adopt different facets of identity. However, the understanding of the self as being in constant flux and transition has been regarded as a perplexing issue in the poststructuralist account of identity (Block, 2007; Norton, 2000). Academics have attempted to provide an explanation by proposing that change can be understood in terms of continuity: a result of change is not something that is entirely new, but rather a transformation of the old (Cillers, 1998). This phenomenon could also be described in terms of what Giddens (1991) posits as biographical continuity: an ongoing narrative project in which we tell stories of ourselves by weaving events from the past and present with projected events from the future, to create an array of possible stories. As Davies and Harré note: An individual emerges through the processes of social interaction, not as a relatively fixed end-product but as one who is constituted and reconstituted through the various discursive practices in which they participate. Accordingly, who one is, that is, what sort of person one is, is always an open question with a shifting answer depending upon the positions

Theoretical Frameworks  15

made available within one’s own and others’ discursive practices within those practices, the stories through which we make sense of our own and others’ lives. Stories are located within a number of different discourses, and thus vary dramatically in terms of the language used, the concepts, issues and moral judgments made relevant, and the subject positions made available within them. In this way post-structuralism shades into narratology. (Davies & Harré, 1999: 35) Such a view of continuity and interaction in the poststructuralists’ account of identity resonates with Dewey’s concept of experience. Dewey also claims that experience is contingent on the environment. In contrast to the essentialists’ supposition that experience is basically the same for all, Dewey regards experience as having no meaning, insofar as it is constituted in language, which allows flexibility for various interpretations of experience. Both poststructuralists and Dewey frame experience as an organic relationship between the environment and the individual. Dewey describes experience as a continuous interaction of the individual with the personal, social and material environment, rather than as a product of precognitive categories on which one’s conception of the world rests: Because every experience is constituted by interaction between ‘subject’ and ‘object’, between a self and its world, it is not itself either merely physical nor merely mental, no matter how much one factor or the other predominates … [experiences] are the products of discrimination, and hence can be understood only as we take into account the total normal experience in which both inner and outer factors are so incorporated that each has lost its special character. In an experience, things and events belonging to the world, physical and social, are transformed through the human context they enter, while the live creature is changed and developed through its intercourse with things previously external to it. (Dewey, 1981: 251) (emphasis added) Dewey’s notion of experience, in other words, does not merely refer to a mental state. Instead, emphasis is placed on the interaction, adaptation and adjustment of the individual to the environment. Experiences are discrimin­ atory in the sense that not all experiences are regarded as worthwhile or educative: experience depends on the ‘quality of experience’ (Dewey, 1997: 27). One important aspect of the quality of any experience is the influence it has upon later experiences, for ‘every experience takes up both something from those which have gone before and modifies in some way the quality of those which come after’ (Dewey, 1997: 35). When Dewey refers to educational experience, he gives centrality to the interrelated concepts of experience, reconstruction of experience, interest and, most importantly, growth. He emphasises that nothing can exist in isolation and that everything is relational, and very often in co-existence. In discriminating between

16  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

educational experiences that are worthwhile and those that are not, Dewey refers to ‘the category of continuity’: When we experience something we act upon it, we do something with it; then we suffer or undergo the consequences. We do something to the thing and then it does something to us in return: such is the peculiar combination. The connection of these two phases of experience measures the fruitfulness or value of the experience. Mere activity does not constitute experience … the measure of the value of experience lies in the perception of relationships or continuities to which it leads up to. (Dewey, 1938: 133) ‘Continuity’ is a pivotal term in Dewey’s conceptualisation of experience. It flags not only elements such as growth, but also reflexivity, transformation, movement and action. The principle of continuity also refers to the connection or link between past and future experiences, as Clandinin and Connelly explain: experiences grow out of other experiences, and experiences lead to further experiences. Wherever one positions oneself in that continuum – the imagined now, some imagined past, or some imagined future – each point has a past experiential base and leads to an experiential future. (Clandinin & Connelly, 2000: 2) In addition to the principle of continuity, Dewey presents the principle of interaction, which refers to the transaction between the individual and the environment. As Dewey himself notes, these two principles are intimately intertwined, so much so it is difficult to distinguish them. In his account of the ‘interaction’, he states that ‘the conceptions of situation and of interaction are inseparable from each other. An experience is always what it is because of a transaction’ (Dewey, 1938: 41). Individuals are inevitably interacting through interacting with others and with the environment; the individual is both shaping and shaped by the interaction. ‘One not only changes things, but is changed in the process’ (Eldridge, 1998: 24). Dewey thus implies the active character of the individual, in the sense that one is able to resist, respond, change and accommodate to the environment as well as to others. Dewey simultaneously expresses concern with both the inner and social dimensions of experience. The subjective state refers to the feelings, hopes, desires or moral dispositions of the individual, while the social conditions point to the environment that forms the individual’s context (Dewey, 1938). For Dewey, the notion of the future – one which is open, unpredictable and requires constant human effort – is also significant to his understanding of experience. Dewey emphasises that we live in a world that is funda­ mentally dynamic. He argues that, under such circumstances, the main task

Theoretical Frameworks  17

of human beings is to focus on the future and not on one’s past (Dewey, 1938). For Dewey, the past has no value unless it provides validity for and increases effectiveness in shaping future decisions. Dewey’s notion of experience can thus be summarised as follows: (1) Experience is worthwhile (contains element of growth, improvement or development). (2) Experience enables future experiences. (3) Experience changes the one who acts and undergoes the experience. (4) Experience affects the quality of subsequent experience. (5) Experience is also social (not only solitary), in that it involves contact with others in the community or with another individual. Dewey’s principles of experience are compatible with the main features of the poststructuralist understanding of identity, wherein identity is viewed as emerging in interaction with others and the environment, in which we both shape and are shaped by others’ perceptions and evaluations of ourselves. Continuity of identity is accomplished by linking our past and present selves, which can be expanded even to our future selves (a concept that will be expanded in reference to imagined communities later in this chapter) through discursive processes (Schirffin, 2006). Dewey described identity or self-formation as an ongoing process founded on the interpretation and reinterpretation of our experiences. Both identity and experience can thus be multiple, but not fragmented.

Dewey and Language Learning: A Social Process There are implicit parallels between the two principles of experience that Dewey posits and the social constructivist and poststructuralist view of learning, where learning is portrayed as the result of an interaction with the environment and not solely as a mental phenomenon of the individual. Dewey regards learning as a reflection of continuity that is established within experience. Learning is the process of giving meaning to what is experienced and to making connections or links to what is to come. As Dewey states, ‘teaching and learning are continuous processes of reconstruction of experiences’ (1938: 111). For Dewey, learning (or teaching) is the result of what one learns from experience, but not all experiences lead to learning. For example, he argues that if a boy burns himself, the burn comes to mean a burn only when the child connects the ‘doing and the being done to’ (1938: 42). Enquiry into experience that is educative pushes us not only to reflect on the issues in our immediate context but also to draw connections among experiences. In this study, and in keeping with Dewey and the poststructuralists, learning is conceptualised as essentially a social and an interactive activity.

18  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Learning a language is even more interactive, since language is an essential semiotic element that permeates all social relationships (Lantolf, 2000). To take the view that learning a language is a social phenomenon prioritises the sociocultural and contextual factors, where individual agency and one’s multiple identities are central to the learning process. In line with Vygotsky’s philosophy, the mind and learning are regarded ‘as socially constituted through appropriation and transformation of social inter­ actions and through mediation (that includes identity changes) via semiotic systems, in particular, language’ (Forman et al., 1993). From this standpoint, learning a language is not merely acquiring knowledge, but is also a discoursal reconfiguration of one’s identity. As Pellegrino Aveni claims: ‘to learn another language is to redefine yourself publicly, socially and personally. No other topic of education so deeply affects the individual’s self-presentation in society’ (Pellegrino Aveni, 2005: 7). Dörnyei supports this view when he states that ‘foreign language is more than a mere communication code that can be learnt similar to other academic subjects, and [researchers] have therefore typically adopted paradigms that linked the L2 to the individual’s personal “core,” forming an important part of one’s identity’ (Dörnyei, 2009: 9). A picture of successful learning occurs through identification and participation in a certain discourse. The prevailing view is that the closer L2 learners attempt to integrate and identify with the L2 group and culture, the better they acculturate and, in turn, achieve a tendency for higher proficiency in the target language. Conflicts arise when individuals find themselves undermined, marginalised and not fully accepted by members of the target community (Dörnyei, 1990, 2005; Norton, 2000, 2013). In other words, a sense of self is closely tied to language learning, but this is contingent on the interplay of one’s subjective state and the social context. In what follows, I will examine in more detail the issues that arise for learners in an EFL setting who attempt to identify and participate with the target community. For example, what exactly are the conflicts they experience? How does the affective dimension influence their learning? How does it affect their identity and their sense of self? I will draw upon the theory of situated learning (Lave & Wenger, 1991) with particular reference to the EFL context of the research site and the concept of imagined communities (Kanno & Norton, 2003). I believe they are useful theoretical frameworks to apply in this study.

Points of Convergence: Situated Learning, Imagined Communities and the L2 Ideal Self Learning understood in terms of identification and participation is the central theme of Lave and Wenger’s (1991) concept of situated learning,

Theoretical Frameworks  19

a notion that was highly influenced by Dewey’s understanding of experience (Jarvis et al., 1998). Situated learning is ‘a process that takes place in a participation framework, not in an individual mind’ (Lave & Wenger, 1991: 15). Lave and Wenger claim that learning was previously portrayed solely as an individual’s metacognitive and cognitive activity, which was something that Dewey had also convincingly argued in his time. In contrast, the idea of situated learning shifts the metaphor of learning from acquisition of knowledge to participation, where identities and meanings are generated in the process (Fuller et al., 2005). The notion of situated learning is closely related to the concept of communities of practice (CoP), as well as the associated concept of legitimate peripheral participation (LPP) (Hughes et al., 2007; Lave & Wenger, 1991). Lave and Wenger distinguish communities of practice from other types of community, such as networks, teams or groups. They regard the notion of community as a symbolically constructed sense of belonging: the feeling we attach to community or to the ideas of certain groups of people. At one point, they define community as ‘a way of talking about the social configuration in which our enterprises are defined as worth pursuing and our participation is recognizable as competence’ (Lave & Wenger, 1991: 5). For the purpose of this study, situated learning offers significant insight into identity and learning. By referring to identity as developing a sense of belonging to a community, the theory posits that ‘learning and a sense of identity are inseparable: they are aspects of the same phenomenon’ (Lave & Wenger, 1991: 115). Learning is related to the formation of identities, a process that is socially situated in interactions with others. Lave and Wenger attempt to capture this view of learning with the concept of LPP, where learning occurs either in or in relation to the communities of practice, whereby learners gradually shift from a position of LPP towards fuller participation. This is achieved via interactions with experienced members of a particular community, through three modes of participation: ‘mutual engagement’, ‘joint enterprise’ and ‘shared repertoire’ (Wenger, 1998). The goal is to align one’s practice with those who are experts in a particular community of practice. The most relevant point is that new forms of participation result in a transformation of identity. In other words, the identities of the individual are constructed as a result of participation in actual practice.1 As L2 learners negotiate their way among the multiple communities to which they belong, they constantly organise and reorganise ‘a sense of who they are and how they relate to the social world’ (Norton, 2000: 11). Wenger reinforces this view when he states that membership of a community of practice ‘translates into an identity as a form of competence’ (Wenger, 1998: 153). The notions of community of practice (Wenger, 1998) and situated learning (Lave & Wenger, 1991) received a great deal of attention following the publication of the seminal texts. Although the community of practice

20  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

approach and the situated learning theory have met with several challenges (Barton & Trusting, 2005; Jewson, 2007), the theories have nonetheless been extensively applied and adopted in L2 research (Duff, 2008), for instance by Toohey (1996, 1998, 2000), Haneda (1997, 2006), Flowerdew (2000), Norton (2000), Morita (2000, 2004), Leki (2001), Kanno (2003, 2008), Kramsch (2006) and Cervatiuc (2009). For the purpose of this research, the application of the community of practice approach and situated learning theory need to be fleshed out with particular reference to language learning in EFL classrooms. The first criticism of situated learning theory in educational contexts is the lack of attention given to participants entering a specific community of learning. It has been pointed out that Lave and Wenger (1991) focus only on legitimate peripheral participation on an ‘inbound’ trajectory. Wenger (1998) recognises this limitation and revises his thesis in his later works by outlining five trajectories of participation that are useful in understanding the notion of situated learning in educational contexts. However, as Haneda (2006) indicates, there is a need to address situated learning theory in terms of L2 classroom settings by considering its participants as individuals with a particular disposition in their life trajectories: past, present and envisioned future. Learners’ differential investment in learning a language results from an interaction of many factors, including both their attitudes towards learning the L2 and their language learning trajectories, which encompass their visions of the communities they wish to belong to in their projected future. Secondly, associated with the above (in terms of lack of attention to the individual), there is the argument that pedagogy cannot be characterised as a way to transmit knowledge from an expert to a novice, and in any case the concepts of ‘novice’ and ‘expert’ are not stable. In a typical L2 classroom, learners may have different kinds of proficiency: some may be fluent orally, whereas others may be able to express themselves much better in writing. Likewise, the teachers, who are usually regarded as the ‘experts’ in a formal language learning environment, all vary in terms of their knowledge of the language as well as their teaching skills. The conception of ‘old-timer or experts’ is often less predictable, clear-cut and fixed than is presented by Lave and Wenger (see James, 2007). In my research context, Lave and Wenger’s idea of associating learning with social participation with the ‘experts’ of that community does not work neatly, unless learning the L2 is an integral part of the learners’ lives outside of the classroom. In an environment where access to the target language is limited, as in this research context, identifying who the ‘experts’ are becomes problematic. There is a need to enrich our understanding of the notion of experts in relation to the community in which the learners are situated. It is therefore crucial to widen the scope of the notion of ‘community’ in applying the situated learning theory in a foreign language learning context.

Theoretical Frameworks  21

As Wenger (1998) avers, face-to-face ‘engagement’ is not the only way individuals assimilate, align and belong to a particular community. Wenger proposes that ‘imagination’, which he defines as ‘a process of expanding oneself by transcending our time and space and creating new images of the world and ourselves’ (Wenger, 1998: 176), is another resource for participation. In an EFL learning environment, where access to the target language is restricted, individuals participate in the activities of the community through the medium of imagination (Yashima, 2013, 2014): then for many language learners, especially for those with little or minimal opportunity for actual contact with speakers of a target language, the imagination is a key site in which individuals negotiate identities. (Yashima, 2014: 110) The notion of imagination allows us to focus less on the boundaries of the communities, and, instead, enables us to focus on the individuals who participate in them through imagination. In discussing of the role of imagination in language learning, it can be argued that language learners’ desire for membership of a community affects their learning trajectories, which in turn influence the construction of self, motivation and investment, and sometimes even contribute to any resistance in the learning of English. Lantolf and Pavlenko suggest that ‘communities of practice can be as broad as a society or culture, or as narrow as a “real” community in which a person has regular involvement’ (Pavlenko & Lantolf, 2000: 148) (i.e. school, workplace). However, more than any other educational activity, the notion of imagination appropriates meanings and creates new identities, by transcending the focus on the learners’ immediate environment (Kinginger, 2004; Kramsch, 2000; Norton, 2000). For many learners of English as a foreign language, the communities of English-users are more ‘imagined’ than ‘real’ (see e.g. Kramsch, 2006; Murphey et al., 2005; Ryan, 2006). ‘Imagined communities’, as outlined by Kanno and Norton, are ‘groups of people not immediately tangible and accessible with whom we connect through the power of imagination’ (Kanno & Norton, 2003: 241). Kanno and Norton draw on Anderson’s (1991) depiction of nation-states as imagined communities, as well as Wenger’s idea that imagination is a form of engagement with communities of practice. A crucial aspect of the notion of ‘imagined communities’ is that such a community ‘is constructed by a combination of personal experiences and knowledge (derived from the past) with imagined elements related to the future’ (Dörnyei, 2005: 98). This is powerfully exemplified in Kanno’s and Norton’s studies of their participants, Rui and Katrina, respectively2 (Kanno, 2000, 2003; Norton, 2000, 2001). What is significant is that, either in their native language or in their target language, Rui’s and Katrina’s investment in the target language could

22  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

be best understood in terms of their imaginary identifications and affiliations with their future communities. Imagination mediated their agency in constructing their identities. Thus, imagined communities can be extended spatially and temporally, and I apply this all-encompassing understanding to my present study. In addition, for the purpose of this study, I would like to direct attention to the discursive space that is created as individuals attempt to align themselves with imagined communities, and how the role of imagination and one’s affective state are intertwined in the process. The discursive space is the spatial and temporal space formed as individuals explore their imagined ties with the future. In order to present a fuller picture, it is necessary to include the concept of the ‘Ideal L2 self ’, as proposed by Dörnyei (2005, 2009). As MacIntyre et al. put it, ‘the potential strength of the L2 self formulation lies in its ability to map out new conceptual linkages by taking the self as the starting point ’ (MacIntyre et al., 2009: 50).

Creating a Discursive Space: The Ideal L2 Self and Experiential Profile My discussion of creating a discursive space employs Dörnyei’s (2005, 2009) Ideal L2 self, which is the L2 facet of an individual’s ideal self, and one of the three components of Dörnyei’s motivational model known as the ‘L2 Motivational Self System’ (Dörnyei, 2005; Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009; Csizer & Magid, 2014). Within the field of second language acquisition, the L2 Motivational Self System appears to be one of the most systematic applications of the ‘possible selves’ construct (Markus & Nurius, 1986). It emerged out of Dörnyei’s attempt to broaden the scope of motivational research by employing within language learning research the psychological theories of self. One of its central tenets is to link the self with action, by making explicit how the self regulates behaviour by setting goals. The L2 Motivational Self System is a tripartite construct composed of: (1) the Ideal L2 self, (2) the ought-to L2 self; and (3) the L2 learning experience. All three function together to provide a link between cognition, behaviour and motivation. It represents an L2-specific version of Higgins’ self-discrepancy theory (1987), in that it includes future-oriented self-knowledge. The two sets of ‘self ’ guides in the L2 Motivational Self System, the Ideal L2 self and the ought-to L2 self, can thus be understood as domain-specific iterations of the ‘possible self ’ theory, where the former represents ‘the learner’s internal desire to become an effective L2 user’ and the latter focuses more ‘on the social pressures coming from the learner’s environment to master the L2’ (Dörnyei, 2014: 8). The third area of the L2 Motivational Self System, the L2 learning experience, is an experiential component in that it highlights learners’ immediate learning environment, such as the impact of teachers,

Theoretical Frameworks  23

curriculum and peer groups, or attitudes towards the learning environment. In other words, according to Dörnyei himself, ‘the new approach [to the study of motivation] concerned two future self guides associated with imagined experience and a third constituent rooted in actual experience’ (Dörnyei, 2014: 8). The fact that the L2 Motivational Self System provides an approach to the conceptualisation of motivational behaviour from a self perspective has a particular relevance to my notion of discursive space, as well as to the context of my present research. The vast number of works empirically operationalising the self system in language learning research in just a few years after Dörnyei developed his theory at the outset this century (Cszier & Dörnyei, 2005; Dörnyei, 2005) exemplifies the huge interest generated among researchers as well as the potential strength of the framework. Although most of the studies that utilise the model have validated it (see for example Busse, 2013; Csizer & Lukacs, 2010; chapters in Csizer & Magid, 2014; chapters in Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009; Henry, 2009, 2010; Lamb, 2012; Papi & Teimouri, 2012), and although they appear to have successfully demonstrated how the Ideal L2 self plays an important role in energising motivation, there are, on the other hand, others who have raised concerns about its applications to motivational research in second language acquisition. For example, while acknowledging how the concept of possible selves could be instrumental in opening up channels to provide valuable insights to the language learning process in general, MacIntyre et al. (2009) caution us not to move in haste, but to have the patience to explore the matter from several perspectives. Focusing more on the possible selves theory rather than the L2 Motivational Self System itself, they contend that we should avoid throwing ‘the baby with the bathwater’ by contemplating areas such as ‘the measurement of possible selves, the proliferation of self-related concepts (the naming problem), cultural variations in the concept of self, conditions that affect the relevance of goals as motives, changes in the selves over time and the junction with identity’ (MacIntyre et al., 2009: 58). In fact, in the same volume (Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009), Dörnyei himself points out the questions that will need to be addressed in future research, which involve the following six issues (Dörnyei, 2009): (1) The uniqueness of the self guides. Do learners have several different desired possible self-images of themselves or only one broad one? (2) The temporal evolution or development of the future self guides. How stable are the ideal and ought-to selves? (3) The relationship between emotions and self guides. (4) The relationship between the ideal and the ought-to self. Given the social nature of the self, at what point can individuals claim that the desired ideal self is fully owned, unlike the ought-to self, which is usually imposed by others?

24  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

(5) The cross-cultural variation in the impact/composition of the L2 Motivational Self System. (6) The question of operationalising self system in measurement terms. In later chapters of this book, I provide empirical data and discuss its implications in response to some of Dörnyei’s concerns listed above, but I now move on to present an account of the framework in order to formulate my argument regarding discursive space.

Discursive Space Dörnyei notion of the L2 Motivational Self System emerged mainly from his criticisms of the integrative concept that had previously dominated the L2 motivation field. That concept defined the motivation to learn another language ‘as reflecting a sincere and personal interest in the people and culture represented by the other group’ (Gardner & Lambert, 1972:132). Dörnyei (2009) saw two problems in Gardner and Lambert’s ‘integrativeness’: (1) its lack of sensitivity to cultural particularities and (2) the changing view towards the ‘inner circle’ English-speaking community within the current context of globalisation. With the variety of Englishes now accessible in the world, the ‘inner circle’ view of English becomes increasingly disassociated from any particular culture. On the other hand, this makes the ‘possible selves’ framework a forceful argument for language learners to employ, as it lacks adherence to a specific community or culture. The move to re-theorise L2 motivation is also illustrated in the shift to taking a more relational perspective, where the focus is on the ever-evolving organic interactions between individuals and their contextual processes, as demonstrated in Ushioda’s person-in-context relational view of motivation (Ushioda, 2009, 2013). In contrast to the traditional, linear orientation in motivational research, within Ushioda’s approach ‘there are no clear-cut and predictable cause–effect relations because the emphasis is on the complexity and idiosyncrasy of a person’s motivational response to particular events and experiences in their life’ (Ushioda, 2009: 355). In Dörnyei and Ushioda (2009), Dörnyei claims that Ushioda’s approach complements his framework in capturing the dynamic and situated nature of motivation: However, proposing a tripartite construct such as the L2 Motivational Self System runs the risk of ending up with a rather static category system that does not take into account sufficiently the process-oriented nature of motivation or the dynamic interaction between motivation and the social environment. (Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009: 354) Both approaches bring questions of self and identity to the forefront of L2 motivational studies. Such a paradigm shift in motivation research is also in

Theoretical Frameworks  25

line with the broader ‘social turn’ in research into second language acquisition (Block, 2007; Lafford, 2007). To summarise, the first two components of the three-dimensional moti­ vational system are rooted in the possible selves theory and also Higgins’ self-discrepancy theory (Higgins, 1987). This new approach to the understanding of motivation includes learners’ orientations towards images of themselves as members of the target language communities. However, the third component, the L2 learning experience, is different in nature and is conceptualised on a separate level from the two self guides in that it deals with the potential influences of the learner’s immediate learning environment. According to Dörnyei: [L2 learning experience] concerns situation-specific motives related to the immediate learning environment and experience (e.g. the positive impact of success, the rapport between teachers and students or the enjoyable quality of a language course). (Dörnyei, 2014: 9) In my view, the third facet of the model is the most distinctive feature of the framework. However, at the same time, it is controversial, and the most under-theorised area, and still requires a considerable amount of unpacking of ideas. What exactly is meant by ‘immediate learning environment’? Surely, for example, the classrooms are also influenced by the curriculum and school ethos and, in turn, the language educational policies or the learning cultures of each specific context. Furthermore, what exactly does ‘experience’ entail? For one, as we see in the chapters to follow, my data suggests that it is not only the positive effects that energise motivation: negative experiences can sometimes also operate as the springboard for further actions. Another question that arises is how the imaginary component of the framework interacts with the experiential part of the model. In the process of attempting to offer explanations, I present my arguments for a discursive space, where learners strive to align themselves to their ideal imagined community. I begin my proposal by broadening the conceptualisation of ‘experience’ in Dörnyei’s recent motivation theory, in the belief that it can provide an important bridge that can offer explanations of this issue, and shed light on the relationships among these questions. Dörnyei’s inclusion of the third component originates from the recognition that although the initial motivation to learn a language may come from internal or external generated self-images, a learner’s motivational drive to learn a language could emerge from various facets of the learning environment, such as the impact of the curriculum, teachers, peer group, language learning activities inside or outside the classroom, but also experience, which might include positive learning history, language-related enjoyment or liking and personal satisfaction. This model postulates that learners’ successful experience with their actual learning process could have a positive

26  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

motivational impact on their subsequent learning. As MacIntyre et al., the L2 learning experience is ‘related to motivation inspired by prior experience interacting with the present environment’ (MacIntyre et al., 2009: 49). In this respect, there is an implicit parallel between the L2 learning experience and Dewey’s (1997) conceptualisation of experience, in that experience propels us not to question the immediate context, but to draw on connections among experiences that encompass both past and present for the future. This is an important point to consider, since, counter to the general understanding, it allows us to conceptualise the Ideal L2 self as not solely a future-directed construct but also one that encompasses the individual’s past and present experiences. That is, in formulating one’s future vision, one often needs to consider not just the future-oriented dimension of the self, but also often one’s past experiences, as well as one’s ongoing experiences and the social/environmental influences. How learners process their past experience will have an effect on their future actions. A retrospective account of what learners experience has an effect on what and how they will determine their future actions. Such an attempt to enrich the idea of experience for individuals to draw on in creating or developing their possible selves is what I propose to call the ‘experiential profile’. The experiential profile is not a static entity that consists merely of a list of one’s language learning experiences, but a rich bank of domain-specific resources that interacts with one’s past, present and future to create, maintain or develop one’s Ideal L2 self. Furthermore, defining agency as a ‘fundamental feature of [the] possible self ’ (Erickson, 2007: 352), Ryan and Irie (2013: 113) argue that one’s agency is the ‘compelling element distinguishing a possible self from a mere vision of oneself in the future state’. In other words, if we are to create our ideal selves from meanings relevant to the self, any vision largely dependent upon outside forces for its realization is unlikely to become a compelling one. A sense of agency within possible selves performs a vital regulatory role, linking possible selves to the current self-concept; if a possible self is too remote from the current self-concept then an individual may not experience the requisite sense of agency. (Ryan & Irie, 2013: 113) This idea will be elaborated further, with examples from my data, in the chapters to come. My attempt to broaden the understanding of experience brings me to examine the role imagination plays in the future-oriented aspect of the self. Imagination is not synonymous with ‘fantasy’. As Markus and Nurius (1986) state and as Dörnyei (2005, 2009, 2014) emphasises, future selves are not fantasies, but they need to be ‘a reality’ for individuals. They need to ‘involve tangible images and senses’ so that ‘people can “see”, “hear” and “smell”’ their possible selves (Dörnyei, 2009: 12). In other words, their

Theoretical Frameworks  27

Ideal L2 self needs to be realistic so that they can envision themselves in the future, as proficient L2 users, for instance. Moreover, ‘These future selfrepresentations are entirely continuous with their current selves’ (Ushioda, 2011: 20). Imagination or imagining is an integral part of how we process and reinterpret past experiences and events. If people are convinced that they will not succeed in attaining their ideal self, obviously, they will not invest any effort in attempting to do so. Murphey’s concept of Near Peer Modelling is useful in putting this understanding into perspective (Murphey, 2007). Near Peer Modelling posits that a learner ‘feels a desire to become like another person who is already near in many ways (e.g. ethnicity, interests, sex, age, frequency of contact, etc.)’ (Murphey, 2007: 93). Thus, ‘The relation between what students want to become and what students actually become may be mediated by what students feel they are able to become’ (Pizzolato, 2006: 59). According to Dörnyei, future self guides are dependent on several key conditions (Dörnyei, 2009; Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009). First, the prerequisite is, obviously, to have a clear vision of a successful ideal self. If it does not exist, a vision of an Ideal L2 self needs to be formed or constructed. But as Dörnyei explains (2005, 2009), in the strictest sense, ‘selecting’ or ‘choosing’ an ideal possible self might be more accurate, since it is unlikely that learners would generate an ideal self out of nowhere. A more realistic approach would be to choose from an array of possible selves, such that their wishes and desires are transformed into their ideal possible selves. The repertoire of tentative possible selves might originate from the ideals that their parents have held, or they might derive from the role models in movies, on television, or in real life (Boyatiz & Akrivous, 2007; Zentner & Renaud, 2007). In fact, theoretically speaking, a learner could have multiple ideal selves that are developing simultaneously. This occurs in language learning and can be extended to other areas. For instance, in an educational context, learners are involved in academic work, and at the same time they are experiencing numerous developmental milestones in life. However, as Dörnyei notes: academic goals will be accompanied by different social goals and prac­ ticing teachers know all too well how such social agendas can modify or disrupt the academic action sequence. However, hardly any research has been done to examine how people deal with multiple actions and goals, how they prioritize between them, and how the hierarchies of superordinate and subordinate goals are structured. (Dörnyei, 2005: 87) This area still needs to be explored in depth, and the stories of Hinako and Takehiro, two of my participants (see Chapter 7), offer a promising way forward. Other key conditions include factors such as the image of the future self, which needs to be elaborate and vivid. Also, it is important that these

28  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

images of the future self are regularly strengthened and activated. This suggests that there is, concomitantly, a developmental and temporal element included in the model, since possible selves can change over time. It involves a developmental process, in that present learning can alter a person’s visions of the ideal self (MacIntyre et al., 2009). For instance, one may witness individuals strengthening their imaginary vision of their ideal selves as language learning progresses. On the other hand, as time progresses, individuals may opt to change their possible self if they believe their goals are unrealistic. Brophy claims that: Identities grow and change, partly in response to encouragement and pressure from the culture at large, or from socialisers, peers and significant others within one’s social circle; these emerging motivations, dispositions, and identities can solidify and develop into core values and more long-term stable identities. (Brophy, 2009: 155) Brophy presumes that learners have the opportunity to make informed decisions regarding their ideal possible selves. However, we know that in any educational settings possibilities to make the appropriate decisions are not equally distributed. In fact, struggle and negotiations may also guide the emerging identities of students. Identities evolve when students negotiate, or voice their concerns and struggles. Different visions of their possible selves emerge ‘between human intentionality and social structure’, where the ‘specificity of time, place and social location’ of participants become crucial (Sealey & Carter, 2004: 195). As it will be presented in Chapter 6, two other participants in this research, Megumi and Yui, appear to have followed this developmental process. Furthermore, in the literature on the possible self, it is interesting to note that a distinction is often made between visions and goals. The future self image is accompanied by relevant procedural strategies that direct one towards the goal. Visions are not manifestation of goals; through imagination, they also help us plan steps towards attaining those goals. Imagination plays a pivotal role in providing the support needed to achieve our short- and long-term goals. An interesting corollary that stems from the central tenet of future self guides is how emotions are factored in the process of articulating one’s ideal selves. When people imagine performing or doing, they not only experience the action, but also feel emotionally involved. This applies to our imagined experiences as well. Drawing on Higgins’ self-discrepancy theory (1987), the L2 framework of the Motivational Self System postulates that one’s desire or want to learn a language emerges from the dissonance between one’s current sense of self and the future selves one aspires to. The uneasiness caused as a result of the gap forces an individual to take actions in order to reduce that feeling of discomfort. To elucidate, Dörnyei (2009) presents an

Theoretical Frameworks  29

example of a woman experiencing tension as she envisions herself working at a bilingual job over the summer (her ideal self), but currently lacks proficiency (her current self) for the position. She therefore enrols herself in a language programme to reduce the discomfort arising from the discrepancy between her Ideal self and real self (an action is taken). This example allows us to conceptualise how the notion of future selves includes an emotional component. Resonating with MacIntyre et al. (2009), Dörnyei and Ushioda (2009) point out that emotions are essential factors to acknowledge in forming one’s ideal L2 self. In short, emotions experienced are a crucial component in understanding the motivational properties of possible selves: [emotions are] critical to understand the motivational properties of the possible self. Emotions are fundamentally important moti­vators. Without a strong tie to the learner’s emotional system, possible selves exist as cold cognition, and therefore lack motivational potency. (Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009: 352) Returning more specifically to my discussions of a discursive space, one of the questions that I had posed at the outset of this section was how visions are translated into actions. In other words, how do learners strive to align themselves to their ideal imagined community? Imaging and creating a desired future self requires individuals to strive towards their envisioned self. Individuals’ visions of their ideal self are realised by alignment to their aspired selves. In order to understand the relationship between alignment and action, I find the notion of alignment as described in the concept of imagined communities very useful. Norton claims that ‘imagination does not necessarily result in coordination of action. It is here that the notion of alignment becomes central because it is through alignment that learners do what they have to do to take part in a larger community’ (Norton, 2001: 164). Following Norton, Greene notes that ‘imagining things being otherwise may be the first step towards acting on the belief that they can be changed’ (Greene, 1995: 22). He also suggests that L2 learners naturally belong to multiple communities, but, given limited time and priorities, at a certain stage of their life learners invest their time and effort in the target language specifically in relation to communities they recognise to be important to their envisioned future. Greene (1995) concludes that how they recognise what is important for them at that particular time in their learning trajectory depends largely on their past language learning experiences. For instance, instead of waiting for the members of that target community to grant them access to their community, in cases where learners feel marginalised by the target language speakers, learners may create their own imagined community, which will help them to recognise themselves as ‘successful’, or at least more in line with their desired selves. In my view, Yashima’s notion of ‘international posture’, which I will describe in detail

30  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

in the next section, appears to be based on this interpretative framework. In other words, the original target community is no longer the goal to strive towards; instead, learners choose to shift to the vision created by their imagined communities. A learner’s symbolic membership of an ‘imagined community’ can thus be understood as the result of human agency, and an example of what can happen at the interface of imagination and alignment. To summarise, my conceptualisation of a discursive space is an application of Dörnyei’s attempt to re-conceptualise motivation. Like the L2 Motivational Self System, it aims to integrate cognition, affect and the social context by situating the self at the centre. I believe it is a forceful paradigm that captures the situated and dynamic understanding of language learning that attempts to take into account its process-oriented nature, and the fluid, ever-evolving interaction between language learning and one’s social environment. The development of an ideal self should thus be viewed in dialectical terms, as emerging in the interaction between self and context. An account of what actually takes place in the discursive space as learners strive towards their Ideal L2 selves will provide us with helpful insights into how the affective dimension and emotions might be implicated in the process of the formation of the self. It will help us respond to an important set of questions. How do learners form their ideal self in the first place? Do all learners possess images of their Ideal L2 self? Can learners’ future images change over time? If so, why? Is there a learning environment conducive to the formation of ideal possible selves? How are emotions and the experiential profile factored into the process? As will be exemplified in the stories of the participants in the later chapters of this book, this study will show, in particular, how an individual’s past L2 learning experience (their experiential profile) can factor into their short- or long-term perspective in their language learning processes as a whole.

The Ideal L2 Self in the EFL Context: The Notion of International Posture Before I proceed to provide the details of my research methodology and methods in the next chapter, I end by presenting an account of the Ideal L2 self that Japanese learners of English appear to be aspiring to in the context of this research. As discussed above, currently, rather than referring to the ‘inner circle’ English, it is more appropriate to talk of ‘world Englishes’, English as a lingua franca or English as an international language (Jenkins, 2007) in the field of second language acquisition. In an EFL environment, where one can expect only minimal opportunities for actual contact with speakers of the target language, the absence of identification with native speakers of the target language is usually readily apparent. This has significant implications in the language learning process, as demonstrated in a variety of educational

Theoretical Frameworks  31

settings (e.g. Lamb, 2004; Warden & Lin, 2000). This is especially relevant in Japan, because for the majority of Japanese secondary students ‘English’ tends to be taught with a strong, clear instrumental function that is examination oriented. But when this pragmatic function is removed at the university level, the purpose of studying English becomes unclear. Without an obvious goal for the learners to strive for, the potential implications for the learner’s sense of self have vast ramifications, more so than is generally appreciated in the field of language learning research (Yashima, 2002). The purpose of this section is to present an account of the imagined communities that the learners in the context of this research envision and strive towards. With limited contact with actual users of English, and with the absence of a meaningful reason to use the language, imagination becomes a key site in which individuals negotiate identities. But how are these communities formed? How are identities produced, and what kinds of identities are they? How do they become relevant in the process? The notion of international posture, as put forward by Yashima (2002), is helpful in shedding light on these issues. Yashima’s notion of international posture is an interesting construct to explore in the Japanese context (Yashima, 2002; Yashima et al., 2004; Yashima & Zenuk-Nishide, 2009). Yashima developed the concept as a way of describing how learners, with minimal meaningful contact with speakers of the target language, can relate to an L2 community. As she puts it, there is ‘an interest in foreign or international affairs, willingness to go overseas to stay or work, readiness to interact with intercultural patterns, and one hopes, openness or non-ethnocentric attitude towards different cultures’ (Yashima, 2002: 57). Based on the concept of the Ideal L2 self, Yashima attempts to describe international posture as a tendency for Japanese learners to relate to the international community (rather than identifying with any specific L2 group): English is something that connects us [Japanese learners of English] to foreign countries, and people with whom we can communicate in English, including Asians and Americans. Even though many Japanese learners wish to interact with native speakers of English, they are not particularly interested in identifying with them. (Yashima, 2009: 145) Yashima (2002, 2009) shows how Japanese learners in higher education choose to belong to, and identify symbolically with, an imagined community of international users of English. For Japanese learners, English is an instrument used to associate themselves with the world without necessarily having the desire to integrate or identify with the English-speaking world (Irie, 2003; Yashima, 2009). The relevance this has for the present study is that international posture affects learners’ L2 learning and communication behaviour as well as their perceptions of themselves.

32  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Utilising the possible self theory, where possible selves are ‘cognitive manifestations of one’s enduring goals, aspirations, motives, fears, and threats’ (Markus & Nurius, 1986: 954), Yashima explains the above in terms of the notion of L2 possible selves where learners envision themselves as future ‘English using selves’ in an international community (Yashima, 2009). Her studies reveal that those learners who adopt more of an inter­ national posture are more likely to generate possible selves by actively pursuing, for instance, an international career, which may lead to greater proficiency and increased opportunities for communication, which in turn can lead to creating an imagined international community. An international posture and visions of themselves as English-users reflect students’ interest in participating in an imagined international community. In such a context, learners are creating or expanding images of themselves, and forging new identities that are connected to the globalised world, rather than to any specific target culture. In an EFL environment, where actual face-to-face contact with the target community is limited, and where one may experience difficulty in identifying with a particular community, it is necessary for learners to create a new identity in an imagined international community, where learners actively pursue their careers. Yashima and Zenuk-Nishide (2009) explore how images of an Ideal L2 self mediate learning behaviours, which also has implications for the kind of identity one constructs and how. The clearer the vision one has of the desired self and the more tangible the self images are, the more one is expected to strive to attain that goal. In fact, in one of her studies, Yashima (2009) proposes two main approaches to personalise a learner’s desired self. One involves the learners having an embodied experience of using the language, such as going on a study-abroad programme. The other is to present instances of near peer role modelling, where learners can observe their peers in successful interactions with users of the target language (Murphey & Arao, 2001). These immediate future selves (self-representations of their ideal selves) serve as a ‘bridge’ or a link to their desired Ideal L2 selves.

Chapter Summary My notion of identity is based on a social constructivist viewpoint, whereby identity is regarded as discursively construed. In particular, I draw on a poststructuralist approach, where the concept of identity is seen as multi­faceted, fluid, dynamic and emerging in interactions with others. Identity is an outcome of social relationships, and all relationships are constrained by the specific cultural, social and linguistic conditions at a given moment within a particular context. However, this research also takes the view that identities are not merely products of one’s response to the environment, but are also conditioned by what individuals brings to their

Theoretical Frameworks  33

interactions, within a certain discursive space. Identity is forged through the perceptions of individuals, perceptions shaped by personal experience and interactions with others, society and culture. This study argues that although identity is a sociological positioning, it is necessary for us to take into account the psychological and emotional dimensions of an individual’s experiences. By applying the notion of discursive space as my interpretative framework, my aim is to explore interactions between L2 learning ex­periences and the development of various possible selves. Through the narrative accounts of the language learning experiences of my six participants, the aim of this research is to demonstrate how the learners’ emotional responses were implicated in the construction and co-construction of their identities, as they participated in the multilayered social context of, for instance, the school, home, friendship or other communities in which they were situated, both historically and socially, at a given time and in a specific location.

Notes (1) Wenger also notes that individuals ‘not only produce identities through the practices we engage in but we also define ourselves through practices we do not engage in’ (Wenger, 1998: 164). Non-participation has two characteristics: peripherality and marginality. Marginal non-participation is the more detrimental to one’s sense of self, as the chances for full participation are severely restricted. (2) Rui is one of Kanno’s informants, whereas Katrina is Norton’s participant. Both were actively involved in their classroom practices, but the realm of their community also extended outside of the classroom, namely, at the intersection of reality and ­imagination.

3 Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions

Qualitative Research As set out in Chapter 1 (see Box 1.1), the three main research questions of this study concern: (1) learners and their past language learning experiences, (2) the learners’ relationship and orientation to English, (3) the learners’ views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future, and (4) how this affects their identities as learners. In order to address these, I decided to take a qualitative approach, focusing a large part of my design on a narrative approach, since the overriding purpose of the study is to examine participants’ experiential accounts of their language learning in an EFL context. The focus is on exploring how the affect dimension might be implicated in the process of identity formation. The rationale for this choice was in line with the nature of my enquiry: the complex task of examining the inner experience of my participants, and determining how meanings are formed through, in and against their sociocultural background. My decision to adopt a qualitative perspective is underpinned by Denzin and Lincoln’s description of it as interpretative and naturalistic, allowing researchers to ‘study things in their natural settings, attempting to make sense of, or to interpret, phenomena in terms of the meanings people bring to them’ (Denzin & Lincoln, 2000: 3). In addition, keeping in line with Denzin and Lincoln (2000), I undertake a multi-method analysis of ongoing human experience, as it is not possible to understand or interpret the complexities of human experiences through a single method. Interviews are the main source of data, but these are supplemented by tools such as weekly email journals. Another reason for taking a qualitative perspective is that it allows for a focus on context (Maxwell, 2005). Conducting research in context is vital, as learning language cannot be separated from its context. It would be impossible for the researcher to make sense of a particular event or behaviour, 34

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  35

such as language learning, without taking into account the sociohistorical and cultural influences that operate in both the temporal and the spatial dimensions. Finally, the most compelling reason for choosing to take a qualitative viewpoint is its focus on process rather than on outcome and product (Maxwell, 2005). One of the purposes of this research is, in fact, to shed light on the process of identity construction rather than to delineate, for instance, some cause-and-effect relationship among certain controlled variables.

Situated qualitative research Even within the different qualitative research traditions (Creswell, 1998), I have found Atkinson’s (2005) notion of situated qualitative research as particularly useful in framing the position of my study. First, Atkinson defines ‘qualitative’ methods as a ‘number of different research approaches that focus on the particular quality of the phenomena being studied, rather than on their frequencies of occurrence – their quantity’ (Atkinson, 2005: 50). As my focus is on learners in a particular setting, I seek to understand how my participants ‘make senses of their world and their experiences they have in the world’ (Merriam, 1998: 6). The purpose is not to seek generalisation, but to get at ‘the quality of what is being studied from the actors’ point of view’ (Atkinson, 2005: 50). Rather than proposing a solution, the aim is to understand the phenomena in question. Atkinson describes ‘situated’ methods as ‘a kind of qualitative research that is maximally grounded in the everyday social world of those being studied’ (Atkinson, 2005: 50). Drawing on Haraway (1988), Atkinson questions the conventional ideology of an all-knowing view of science that is based on a ‘view from nowhere’ or a ‘God’s eye view’. Instead, he advocates, ‘the view from somewhere’: The view from somewhere always acknowledges and indeed takes full advantage of its situatedness and partiality.… [The] particular qualities of the research situation … rather than being factored out or neutralized to arrive at universally generalizable findings, should be factored in in ways that make our findings locally and situationally valid.… [This] is a much more human and viable science because it stays close to the ground of human experience rather than trying to abstract away from it as much as possible. (Atkinson, 2005: 51–52; original emphasis) In other words, what is endorsed is a shift of focus to the particular qualities of each individual situation (e.g. who the participants are, and what they say and do), implying that there is no one fixed ‘reality’, but a variety of ‘realities’ which are ongoing, in constant flux, and dependent on each specific context. Indeed, the participants of this study are certainly not static

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‘entities’ or complete or even absolute, but live through different levels of engagement in the microsystem (family and friends, etc.), the mesosystem (schools, local communities, workplace, etc.) and in a broader layer of the macrosystem (society, culture, etc.). Atkinson further notes that in situated qualitative research ‘there is a special charge to welcome human behavior in all its richness and diversity’ (Atkinson, 2005: 63; original emphasis), and concludes that: [situated qualitative research] is maximally flexible, maximally adaptive to the always-in-process, always-in-flux individuals-in-society and social situations that it attempts to study.… Only in this way … are we able to understand how individuals lead social lives. This is because the individual and the social are not separate things, but rather two aspects of the same thing, each of which contributes to defining the whole. (Atkinson, 2005: 63)

Narratives as Stories of Experiences Based on my understanding of qualitative study as set out above, in what follows I first describe how narrative study is used in current language research. Next, I will provide an account of how narrative enquiry is understood in this study by framing narratives as basically stories of experiences (Bruner, 1990). I will then illustrate how narratives can be a tool for identity research before concluding with a discussion of how narratives can function as a vehicle for understanding identity construction.

Narrative enquiry in language learning research: Focus on the learner Identity has become a key construct in the field of applied linguistics and language learning research. It has been explored from various angles in a multitude of contexts. Some have researched it by focusing on a particular identity category, such as ethnic or national identity (e.g. De Fina, 2003; Gottlieb, 2005), or gender or sexuality (e.g. Bucholtz et al., 1999; Cameron & Kulick, 2003; Johnson & Meinhof, 1997; Piller, 2001), or social group (Ricento, 2005) or age group (e.g. Coupland & Nussbaum, 1993; Nikander, 2002). Others have examined a specific context of identity construction, an example being Block’s study (2007) that focuses on three different environments: identity in adult migrant contexts, foreign language contexts and study-abroad contexts. Still others have explored the different discursive environments in which ‘identity work’ is being done. For instance, Benwell and Stokoe (2006) show how identity is constructed in everyday conversations

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  37

(e.g. news interviews, university websites), institutional settings, multi­ lingual contexts, stories or narratives, and even in commodified contexts (e.g. personal advertisements, magazines), spatial locations (e.g. in neighbourhoods, in public parks) and virtual environments (e.g. on the web, in chat rooms). However, despite the variety of research subjects, the approach has typically been limited to two broad but distinct methodological orientations: one that examines learners’ identity construction through interaction with others, and one uses oral or written auto/biographical accounts of the learners’ experiences in foreign language learning. This study is an example of the latter approach. The approach a researcher decides to employ is, of course, dependent on the nature of and objectives of the investigation. My research questions required me to examine the experiences of my participants and to listen to their ‘voices’ in order to understand the complexities involved in forging their identities. This called for a methodology that would allow me to be sensitive to the learners’ accounts of their experiences, and one that would provide potential for a detailed examination. A narrative approach appeared to be the best way to probe the inner complexities of my research participants. As Barkhuizen et al. state: Narrative methods are especially valuable when we want to capture the nature and meaning of experiences that are difficult to observe directly and are best understood from the perspective of those who experience it. Narrative plays an important role because experiences cannot be directly observed. (Barkhuizen et al., 2014: 8) A quick survey of language learning research conducted during the past two decades confirms that narrative accounts of learners’ stories are regarded as a valid source of data for research (Duff, 2008). A call for a more socially informed approach to the understanding of second or foreign language learning (e.g. Block, 2003; Firth & Wagner, 2007; Hua et al., 2007; Pavlenko & Lantolf, 2000) opened up new avenues of enquiry, enabling researchers to address broader issues surrounding an individual’s language learning. The most notable shift was the rise of learner-focused research, wherein learners’ perceptions of their educational experiences were recognised as a source of valuable insights into their learning processes (e.g. Benson & Nunan, 2005). Researchers have acknowledged the significance of eliciting stories from the participants themselves, regarding them as a legitimate source of data that can complement more traditional approaches (e.g. Kanno, 2003; Norton, 2000; Pavlenko & Lantolf, 2000). No longer are learners depicted as the ‘site’ of language development; instead, they are portrayed as multifaceted social beings. This more widely formulated understanding of learners necessitates a re-examination of research methodology and methods in relation to second language acquisition: one that has the scope to include more complex,

38  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

human-centred issues. With an emphasis on the learner, the use of narrative accounts in language learning increased research (Bell, 2002; Duff, 2008; Pavlenko, 2007). Leading narrative researchers have claimed that narrative enquiry is a ‘tool’ that offers insights and alternative ways into issues that were inaccessible using more ‘experimental’ methodologies (Bruner, 1986, 1990; Clandinin & Connelly, 2000; Connelly & Clandinin, 1999). Narrative data in past language learning research has been gathered in various forms:1 diaries, life histories, journals, language learning memoirs, online texts, face-to-face interviews and, more recently, even visual documents (photography, painting, collage, etc.) (Page, 2010). Similarly, several modes of analysis are available. Many such studies indicate that these sources and methods are instrumental in extricating the broader issues connected with language learning, as well as in identifying the interplay of various ‘factors’ that influence the language learning process. For instance, diaries offer insights into the learners’ private conceptualisations of their language learning experiences (Bailey, 1983; Schumann, 1980). Autobiographical narratives collected through ‘talks’ and ‘conversations’ with learners can lead researchers to a more comprehensive understanding of the social and affective factors in language learning, such as anxiety, emotions, investment, motivation, agency, power and, of course, identity (Angelia-Carter, 1997; Day, 2002; Harklau, 1994; Heath, 1983; Hunter, 1997; Lam, 2004; McKay & Wong, 1996; Miller, 2003; Norton, 2000, 2013;Toohey, 2001; Willet, 1995). Learner differences in beliefs and learning strategies that have been investigated using traditional quantitative approaches have also been explored using narrative texts, as exemplified as in studies by Kalaja and Barcelos (2006) and Oxford and Green (1996). These researchers acknowledge the benefits of employing narrative enquiry in their research and regard narratives as a means to help encapsulate the ‘human essence’ of language learning.

Framing narratives as means to understand experience Although the above list of studies using narrative enquiry in language learning is by no means exhaustive, the common thread is the central role narratives give to experience. In fact, many academics in narrative research have regarded experience as the feature that distinguishes narrative from other kinds of qualitative study (e.g. Clandinin & Connelly, 2000; Goodson et al., 2010; Ricoeur, 1984, 1991; Riessman, 2008; Squire, 2008). However, in spite of the vast amount of literature on narratives produced in recent years, there has been a lack of precision in the terminology that surrounds this topic (e.g. Andrews et al., 2008; Elliot, 2005; Riessman, 1993, 2008). In order to avoid getting submerged in murky waters, I suggest that we under­ stand ‘narrative’ as Bruner does, as a way of using language to construct stories (Bruner, 1990). What Bruner writes has at two implications: first, his

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  39

thinking suggests that narrative is the means by which individuals define and recreate themselves through the discursive construction of identity (Martinez-Roldan, 2003); second, it suggests that individuals organise their experiences in terms of stories (Burr, 2003). My research follows the understanding that narratives are fundamentally stories of experiences. In the experience-centred approach, narratives are the means of sense-making: human beings create meaning from their experiences both individually and socially (Bruner, 1986, 1990, 1991; Polkinghorne, 1995). Connelly and Clandinin (1990), for instance, have argued that narrative enquiry stems from an understanding of human experience in which people, both individually and socially, lead storied lives. Life is ‘storied’ in the way that people make sense of who they are (and others are) by interpreting their past in terms of their present lives and selves as well as their future lives and selves. Narratives are not only about people describing their past experiences, but also about how individuals understand those experiences, and how they ascribe meanings to those experiences (Clandinin & Connelly, 1994, 2000; Clandinin, 2007). People seem to draw together disconnected experiences (including actions or events), and ascribe meaning to them. As Casanave notes, ‘it is this power of narrative to ascribe meaning to parts, and to configure them into wholes, that define narrative as a meaning-making phenomenon’ (Casanave, 2005: 18). An example of how narrative provides meaning to language learning experience can be seen in the interview excerpt where one of my participants, Sayaka, talks about her first ‘encounter’ with English: My mother used to play a lot of songs from Disney movies – we went to Disneyland, watched Disney movies, and she bought me a lot of things with Mickey and Minnie on it. It stirred up my interest in listening to those Disney songs, and she would play it quite often. Come to think of it now, I think she was trying to expose me to a different kind of sound and rhythm than the one I was used to: English! It was fun! [Emphasis added] From this short excerpt, we see Sayaka trying to make sense of her mother’s actions in encouraging her to listen to English songs during her early childhood. In narrating this episode, Sayaka was connecting or weaving parts of her language learning experience into meaningful larger chunks, as a way to construct a sense of coherence from her many fragmented memories of learning English. Her stories were not merely recollections of past events nor simple responses to my enquiries, but accounts of how those events were interpreted and experienced by her. Thus, while narratives describe past experience, they simultaneously can suggest ways for individuals to make sense of the past, which may, in turn, influence or set a direction for their future learning.

40  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Narratives as tools for identity research Narratives are not only about personal experiences, but may include the social, cultural and historical context in which an individual’s experiences are constructed, shaped and expressed. In fact, the experience-centred approach to narrative is highly influenced by the Deweyan ontology of experience, in particular his two principles of continuity and interaction. As explained in Chapter 2, experience is important to understand situations. Dewey’s idea of continuity concerns not only the immediate context, but also how to draw connections between experiences (Johnson & Golombek, 2002) and/or how past experiences fashion the way individuals interpret new life circumstances, or how new experiences change the way that experiences are understood. Experience is not just a mental state but includes the interactions of the individuals with the environment (interaction). Thus, understanding narratives as experience implies that narratives are not simply isolated individual productions but include a social dimension as well. Personal experiences need to be grounded in participants’ wider social and historical contexts (Riessman, 1993, 2008). Furthermore, as Pavlenko states, the social aspect encompasses not only the relationship between the storyteller and the interlocutor, but also the site of the telling or the interview. Through the ‘stories’ told, ‘the interrelationship of time, space and social context surfaces, and the influence which these contexts have on lived experiences and identity formation, can thus be explored’ (Pavlenko, 2007: 70). Riessman also highlights this point: The story is being told to particular people; it might have taken a different form if someone else were the listener. In this case, I am not simply representing the experience on the beach from some neutral place, but in a specific conversation with a mentor or friend and his partner, who mean something to me. In telling about an experience, I am also creating a self – how I want to be known by them. (Riessman, 2008: 11) This hints at the multiple layering of narrative research, which leads Clandinin and Connelly (2000) and Ollerenshaw and Creswell (2002) to frame narrative enquiry according to three dimensions that are grounded in Dewey’s principles of interaction and continuity: temporality, sociality and place. The emerging stories of the lived experiences of the participants include a rich tapestry of human experience and emotions. For the researcher, this presents challenges. It calls for a framework that enables the researcher to present participants’ stories as interpretable data. With this purpose in mind, I have drawn on Ollerenshaw and Creswell’s (2002) ‘three-dimensional space narrative structure’ in elaborating a framework for interpreting my data (see Table 3.1).

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  41

Table 3.1  The three-dimensional space narrative structure Temporality/continuity

Interaction/sociality

Past: Look backward to remembered experiences, feelings, stories from earlier times

Personal: Look inward to internal conditions such as desires, feelings and hopes

Present: Look at current experiences, feelings and stories, relating to actions or an event Future: Look forward to implied possible experiences and plot lines

Social: Look outward to existential conditions in the environment, with other people and their intentions, purposes, assumptions and points of view

Situation/place Look at context, time and place situated in a physical landscape, or setting, with topological and spatial boundaries, with characters’ intentions, purposes and different points of view

Adapted from Ollerenshaw and Creswell (2002).

The first element, temporality, refers to Dewey’s notion of continuity, in that experience can move backwards and forwards; it has a past, a present and a future reference. As Clandinin and Connelly explain: [temporality is] the idea that experiences grow out of other experiences, and experiences lead to further experiences. Wherever one positions oneself in that continuum – the imagined now, some imagined past, or some imagined future – each point has a past experiential base and leads to an experiential future. (Clandinin & Connelly, 2000: 2) Whatever is being studied – events, people or objects – they are in temporal transition. Time encompasses the coexistence of ‘futurity and past in the present, the reconstruction of the past by new presents, and the projection of the present into the future imaginings’ (Stanley, 1992; Steedman, 1987; both cited in Andrews et al., 2008). Every experience takes up something from the past and present, and takes it to future experiences. As Dewey describes, experience is something that ‘stretches’ both temporally and spatially. The second dimension, sociality, overlaps with Dewey’s understanding of interaction (individuals are always in interaction with their surroundings). There is a simultaneous concern with both personal and social conditions. ‘Personal’ refers to the desires, hopes and feelings of an individual, while

42  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

‘social’ points towards the environment, surrounding factors and forces. Finally, situation/ place signifies the context where events (and enquiry) take place. The impact places may have on lived and told experiences can be crucial. Thus, researchers need to be attentive to the way the story shifts when places change. The context in which these narratives are produced may have important implications, since interviews are ‘acts of communication’. One of the tasks in narrative research is thus to disassemble how an individual’s engagement with the social world affects social relationships and individual agency in forming identities. It illuminates the interplay of social, historical and spatial contexts in constructing, living and/or perceiving individual lives. This three-dimensional model of experience serves my participants well as they describe: their past experiences, both on a personal and on a social level; their recollection of the past and how it was re-interpreted in the present situation; and, most importantly, how they perceive the future, and how it can or will influence them in forging their identities. Narratives construct stories of lived experience within the narrative dimensions of time, place and personal/social relationships.

Narratives as a vehicle for the construction of identities Narratives appear to be particularly suited to exploring one’s identity construction, since they are not merely a means of communication, with narrators informing listeners of their experiences. Many academics interested in the construction of identity (e.g. Brockmeier & Carbaugh, 2001; Bruner, 2002; Elliot, 2005; Mishler, 2006; Squire, 2008) argue for the import­ ance of narrative by suggesting that identity is located in told narratives: • Narratives and life stories are prime settings for identity construction (Schiffrin, 2006). • When telling stories, we convey to others a sense of who we are, of our beliefs and values (Bastos & Oliveria, 2006). • Without recourse to narration, the problem of personal identity would be in fact have no solution (Ricoeur, 1991). Thus, identity is understood to be constructed in the stories we narrate, and re-narrate, to ourselves as well as to others. It involves the reconstruction of a person’s experience in relation both to the other and to a social milieu (Clandinin & Connelly, 2000). As noted in Chapter 2, identity is no longer regarded as ‘given or innate’; individuals construct who they are, and how they want to be known, in a particular discourse. Identity is seen as something that emerges out of what is said and done as connections are made to explain, negotiate and make meaning of events and experiences. In other words, narrating experience is not merely a communication tool but also allows people to negotiate and/or make meaning out of it.

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  43

As Kanno (2003) and others have claimed, narrative is what connects our fragmented, multiple identities. And because our identities are fragmented, there is a natural desire to connect our multiple identities, in order to provide a coherent sense of self: Tapping into issues of identity – how one views oneself and relates to the world around one – requires an inquiry into people’s experiences and meaning making, and an inquiry into those areas calls for the use of narrative. (Kanno, 2003: 11) Dyer and Keller-Cohen echo Kanno by explaining that narrative is an instrumental device in bonding these different selves (Dyer & Keller-Cohen, 2000; see also Linde, 1993; Ochs & Capps, 2001): Narrative … unites the selves of our past with those of the present, and even with the projected selves of the future … bringing together in a coherent fashion differing versions, each narrative providing the authors with a deep sense of understanding. This characteristic of narrative is an important means of (re)construction of identity, an outward manifestation of the ‘reflexive project of the self ’ … which is sustained through a continuous process of reflection and revision. (Dyer & Keller-Cohen, 2000: 285) Not only do participants’ stories inform us of their experiences, but they can also be powerful vehicles to uncover deeply embedded values and assumptions that even the tellers themselves may not be aware of (Bell, 2002). At times, what people leave out in their accounts can be brought to the surface, and they can offer important insights into experiences that could otherwise have remained concealed. As Murray states: People’s identities are therefore not solely represented in the stories they tell; they could be, in fact, sometimes imagined or constructed through narratives. Narratives do not show people just as they are, it can express what they believe themselves to have been and to be. (Murray, 2008a: 139) This self-formative power inherent in narrative is a crucial feature that enables me to better understand my participants’ experiences. Another important feature of the narrative construction of oneself is that narratives are not complete stories. They provide only opportunities to unify one’s various selves. This becomes clearer if narrative enquiry is viewed with respect to what Mishler (2006) calls the ‘experiential/ narrative mode of time’. Mishler proposes different types of time and

44  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

temporal order: clock/chronological versus an experiential/narrative model of time. The former approaches experience as a series of events or simply lists (Labov & Waltesky, 1967), whereas the latter evaluates experiences as a series of stories. The experiential/narrative model of time runs counter to the conventional representation of clock time, where events are lined up sequentially, one after the other. Mishler ‘emphasizes the significance of a plot, as governing how a sequence of events are made into story … a plot establishes human action not only within time … but within memory’ (Mishler, 2006: 33). The ‘plot’ is what people rely on to make sense of their lives and to construct coherent identities through the stories they tell and retell (Connelly & Clandinin, 1990; Polkinghorne, 1988; Ricouer, 1981). For example, Jill Bell (1997), who observed her own trajectory as an adult learner of Chinese, describes her progress in several stages. In one version of her story she presents herself as a failure, but in another she recasts the same experience in a more positive light. The ‘events’ did not change, but there was a shift in the way she constructed herself as a learner of Chinese. This exemplifies how the past is, so to speak, not always set in stone: ‘The meanings of events and experience are constantly being reframed within the contexts of our current and ongoing lives’ (Mishler, 2006: 37). Bell’s case demonstrates how the narrator can flexibly ‘adjust’ the narrative, depending on the interlocutor, or the circumstances in which the story is told. In this way, the meaning of an event, or the interpretation of it, may be contingent on subsequent occurrences. There is the possibility that future events will change the interpretation of meanings of events in the past. Thus, to put it differently, although narratives act as coherence-making devices, they also reflect the complex, never-ending task of constructing a coherent narrative and ultimately a coherent personal narrative.

Narratives, Emotions and the Experiential Experience Adopting narrative studies to explore the emotive aspects of language learning is not particularly unusual (e.g. Dewaele, 2005; Garret & Young, 2009). To date, researchers in the field of second language acquisition and language learning research have not failed to underscore the significance of the role that affect and emotions play in an individual’s language learning experience and outcomes (Arnold, 1999; Garret & Young, 2009; Gass & Selinker, 2008; Horowitz, 2001). For researchers interested in this area, it is also encouraging to see how the recent focus on the relationship between language, culture and identity has increased the awareness of the role of affective factors: emotions are now considered to play a major role in the learning process (e.g. Norton, 2000, 2013; Kramsch, 2003a, 2003b; Piller & Takahashi, 2006). Although learners may be exposed to the same language learning class, the perceptions of their learning experience obviously vary for

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  45

each individual and their accounts tend to focus on the affective dimension of their learning process (Bailey, 1983; Garret & Young, 2009; Schumann, 1990). However, as Pavlenko laments in Emotions and Multilingualism, emotions have been: reduced to a laundry list of decontextualized and oftentimes poorly defined socio-psychological constructs such attitudes, motivation, anxiety, self-esteem, empathy, risk-taking, and tolerance of ambiguity. (Pavlenko, 2005: 34) Pavlenko then shifts the focus to ‘understanding emotions as states, processes, and relationships’ (Pavlenko, 2005: xii). Rather than singling out a particular emotional state, she explores its interactions with the process of language learning and use. For instance, anxiety is considered to be an emotional state that ‘interferes with the acquisition, retention, and production of the new language’ (MacIntyre & Gardner, 1991: 96). Researchers have typically explored a cause–effect relationship between affect and language learning or proficiency by regarding anxiety as a variable. However, these studies fail to consider several important questions. What emotional worlds are created by learning different languages? How do learners perceive their anxiety and experiences, and how do these perceptions influence their ex­ periences of self? How do emotions such as anxiety affect learners’ affective repertoires? In other words, as Pavlenko (2006) maintains, it is necessary to reframe the fragmentary nature of current research on affective factors to widen its scope and take on board a wider, interdisciplinary but integrated approach to the study of emotions (Pavlenko, 2005, 2006). The research done by Imai (2007, 2010) on emotions also takes this wider perspective. He criticises the assumption in the traditional understanding of second language acquisition that the ‘affective domain can be characterized as individualistic, cognitive, dichotomous, and product-oriented in its assump­tions and foci’ (Imai, 2010: 280). Instead, he emphasises a non-linear correlation between cognition and emotion. Imai argues that, first, research has prioritised certain negative emotions (e.g. anxiety), while positive emotions such as joy, enjoyment, hope and gratitude have been marginalised. Second, he notes that emotions often tend to be regarded as the individual’s response to external stimuli, whereas in fact they have an important socially constructed dimension and situational factors. In addition, he claims that the individualistic view on affect has failed to acknowledge the communicative and interpersonal dimension of learners’ emotional responses. Finally, drawing on Johnson and Tversky (1983) and Forgas (1995), Imai argues that one’s perception of a given situation may not always have a one-to-one correspondence with a particular emotion and act or behaviour. To Imai, emotions are:

46  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

not just an individual’s private inner workings in response to external stimuli but are socially constructed acts of communication that can mediate one’s thinking, behavior and goals. (Imai, 2010: 279) Pavlenko similarly stresses the significance of taking into account the interplay of social conditions and emotions: ‘we should wave away the question of what emotions are and focus [instead] on what emotions do’ (Pavlenko, 2013: 23; original emphasis). To view emotion as a social phenomenon suggests that it can mediate language learning and participation in various ways. For example, how indi­ vidual’s emotions such as embarrassment are acknowledged or recognised differs across cultures and (within cultures) across specific social contexts (Swain et al., 2011).2 Maynard (2002, 2005) also emphasises the social dimension of emotions, and contends that emotions are not only a product of the internal but are also influenced greatly by the environment and, thus, in reality it is more accurate to view emotions and the social dimensions of emotions as complementary. By referring to the Aristotelean notions of pathos and logos, Maynard succinctly summarises the social dimension of emotions as follows: Significant to the understanding of pathos, is that human emotions are not simply experienced internal to the person, but rather, are experienced through interaction with other factors, including how the context influences the person, and how the interacting partner may emotionally react. (Maynard, 2002: 6) Furthermore, how individuals perceive their position within a social environ­ ment has a tremendous impact on whether they can respond flexibly and creatively to the possibilities in that environment. This, in turn, can have grave implications in terms of their participation in a particular learning community. For example, in Chapter 5 we shall see how Sayaka took control when she felt that she had been marginalised in one of her classes in her study-abroad programme. Emotions can be both individually experienced and, at the same time, socially or culturally shaped. As Oxford states, ‘language learning histories often evoke a wealth of emotions and other affective reactions from the language learner’ (Oxford & Green, 1996: 22). This highlights how the emotional dimensions of language teaching and learning, which are often suppressed by other research methods, are brought to the forefront. For the participants in this study, the narrative accounts of their experiences entail reflections on their feeling states that may not be readily perceived by others. Moreover, their stories have the potential to reveal how their feelings can be shaped by concepts specific to a particular language. By weaving together my participants’ narratives on their language learning experience, and by conceptualising emotions as

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  47

socially constructed, I aim to show how emotions can assist in illuminating the experience of self. Focusing on the learners’ emotional experiences in their L2 learning process can reveal the ways in which emotions mediate the transitions in their experiential worlds. In the next section, a brief discussion on narrative interviews is presented in order to provide the foundations of the methodology of this research (the subject of Chapter 4).

Narrative Interviews: ‘Parameters of Sensitivity’ The current popular understanding of qualitative interviews in applied linguistics can be characterised by the metaphors of ‘mining’ (Kvale, 1996) or the ‘camera’ (Holstein & Gubrium, 2000), where researchers critique the positivist view of the interview and instead take the constructivist position. The understanding is that although in the former interviewees are regarded simply as sources of information, in the latter interviews are treated as a site of social interaction. The focus of the conventional interviews is usually on the content – what is said – whereas in qualitative or narrative interviews more emphasis is placed on how the talk is constructed. In short, interviews or talks in a qualitative or narrative approach are understood as meaningmaking endeavours between the researcher and the participant. However, focus on the interactional context of the interview process, obviously, brings issues such as the role of the researchers to the fore, since researchers can no longer be invisible. In fact, the relationship between the researcher and the participant, as Block suggests, is a complex one: [narrative interviews should be seen] as conversations and co-­constructed discourse events … not as direct windows on the minds of the interviewees … conceptualization of interviews as co-constructions means that interview data are seen not as reflections of underlying memory but as adopted by the research participants in response to the researcher’s prompts and questions. (Block, 2007: 759) Norton and Early (2011) point out that the researcher’s identity has largely been under-emphasised in language teaching research. They contend that studies in this area could ‘enrich narrative inquiry, both theoretically and methodologically, and make visible the complex ways in which researcher identity impacts research, not only in language teaching, but in education more broadly’ (Norton & Early, 2011: 415). Narratives are not just constructed, but co-constructed (Atkinson & Silverman, 1997; Barkhuizen, 2011; Holstein & Gubrium, 2000; Ochs & Capps, 2001) by the participant and the researcher. Narrative interviews are not just a means of ‘collecting data’, but are themselves sites of ‘data’

48  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

production: ‘narratives do not merely refer to experiences, but create ex­ periences for their audience’ (Mattingly, 1998: 23). Narrative interviews are discursive accomplishments. Depending on who the researcher is, and also the relationship with the narrator, the same story of an experience can be told quite differently, depending on when the story is ‘told’ and who the story is intended for. Mishler advises researchers that: we need to pay attention to how a story is told and the specific context in which it was told; to whom it was told; why it was told in the way it was told. Why did the narrator select and assemble experiences and events in the way it was presented? (Mishler, 2006: 31) One cannot ignore how both the speaker’s and the listener’s identities and preconceptions come into play. Thus, although there may be discrepancies between one telling and another, these differences do not necessarily indicate that one is more fictive than the other. It is merely another interpretation of the individual. The stories that my participants tell me are ‘snapshots’ in a moment of time. As Kanno has noted: In narrative inquiry, such revisions and contradictions are not aberrant factors to be resolved, but are viewed as narrative adjustments that reflect the teller’s changing perspective. (Kanno, 2003: 9) Narrative enquiry provides us with an approach that allows us to avoid ‘outdated snapshots’ (Bell, 2011). Reinterpretations of our experience enable us to capture the temporal shifts in our understanding of our experiences. Karlson (2008) uses the metaphor of the kaleidoscope to represent different tellings of a story. Referring to Karlson, Stanley comments as follows: You look and you see one fascinatingly complex pattern, the light changes, you accidentally move, or deliberately shake the kaleidoscope, and you see – composed of the same elements – a somewhat different pattern. (Stanley, 1992: 87) All we can say with certainty is that, at the point in time when the participants told their story, this was how they interpreted their past. Schiff and Noy take the matter one step further when they point out the importance of making a distinction between narratives and narrative enquiry: the former are ‘constantly framed by our social context and our past experience; [but the latter] is written in the context of conversations with other human beings’ (Schiff & Noy, 2006: 422). Narrative enquiry is a process which encompasses a person and the situation of the telling, as well as larger cultural meanings. Not only are these cultural/social meanings imposed on individuals, but some ‘meanings’ are chosen to shape one’s self

Narrative Approach: Identity Studies and Emotions  49

and others selectively. People usually select meanings that resonate with them at a particular time and place, with a certain audience in mind (Schiff & Noy, 2006): ‘Every representation no matter how faithful we try to portray it can only be a selective emphasis of our experience’ (Clandinin, 2007: 45). Thus, explicit accounts by researchers of their role in a project, and their potential influence over the findings, are expected in qualitative studies. It is inevitable when researchers go into their research settings that they also bring their personal and intellectual ‘baggage’ with them, such as age, gender, ethnicity, social and cultural background, as well as their religious and political orientation. In other words, researchers have their own worldview, based on their experiences, through which they understand their research. What is crucial with such an approach to research is not the subjectivity of the researcher but, as Mann (2010) has argued, a more reflective approach in terms of the collection, analysis and representation of qualitative interviews, by suggesting a number of ‘parameters of sensitivity’. This approach takes into consideration the co-constructed nature of the interview process and its interactional context, and gives a greater focus on the researcher; it also gives more emphasis to the ‘how’ (attention to form and context of construction) rather than to the ‘what’ (content) of the talk. The most important element with such a reflective approach is to ‘reflect’ this sensitivity into the process of one’s research, an issue that I will address in the next chapter.

Chapter Summary This chapter has set out the theoretical and methodological foundations of the research design. I have devoted a large part of this chapter to a dis­ cussion of narrative enquiry in identity studies, and focused on establishing how the notion of narrative is understood in this study. In the next chapter, I detail the research design itself, by tracing the steps taken in carrying out the study, which includes information about the participants, the data collection and the organisation and analysis of the data.

Notes (1) Some academics make a distinction between ‘small stories’ and ‘big stories’ (Bamberg & Georgakopoulou, 2008; Georgakopoulou, 2007; Watson, 2007). Small stories are ‘snippets of often mundane talk in conversations (and sometimes in interviews) which tell of past, imagined, or hypothetical events, as opposed to big narratives like life histories and those compiled from multiple interviews, and other ethnographic data, collected over an extended period of time’ (Barkhuizen, 2011: 399). (2) This is useful in understanding the commonly accepted stereotype that Japanese people are not emotional, or that they do not show emotion to outsiders. But such a

50  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

view may be at least partly result from the fact that some Japanese verbal expressions or strategies are not comparable or readily translated into other languages. It may even be that the stereotype derives from observation only of formal occasions, where Japanese people do indeed tend to be more reserved in their speech and behaviour. This underlines the fact that the expression of emotion (for Japanese people as for others) is influenced by social factors, since the Japanese people tend to express emotion in different ways depending on their interlocutors (Kudo & Matsumoto, 1996).

4 The Research Design

Research Design Given the exploratory nature of my research, it was necessary for me to choose a method that would illuminate the complexities of the subject matter and raise questions for further exploration. In order to provide an overview of my research plan, this chapter presents a descriptive account of the research site, the participants, the methods of data collection and analysis, and the process of interpretation. The chapter closes with a dis­ cussion of some of the challenges the researcher faces when working with oral narrative data.

The Research Site: A Unique University In order to contextualise the stories of the research participants, I will first present a descriptive account of the research setting from three perspectives: the institution itself, its students and the curriculum – an overview of the two-year intensive English Language Program (ELP) that the students undergo at this liberal arts college. Unlike instruction at secondary level, where English classes tend to focus on receptive and translation skills, the ELP at this university emphasises the development of critical thinking within the liberal arts tradition. This implies that students need to be actively engaged in their learning, which is quite different from the passive stance students are trained to take in high school. As we shall observe in the stories of my participants in the chapters to follow, the students’ active participation in the classroom necessitated that they become active agents in their learning. Thus, at times, the language learning classroom became a battleground on which to negotiate their identities. 51

52  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

The institution Established in 1953 by a group of Christian missionaries from the United States, the institution was the first liberal arts college in Japan. In an era when the prime function of higher education was research (rather than education), a university which followed the liberal arts tradition was in many ways a revolutionary concept in Japan (Takeda, 2003). The founders of this university turned to higher education in the United States for a model, especially to the liberal arts traditions of Harvard, Yale and Columbia. In fact, the principles outlined by the then Harvard President, James Conant, had a tremendous influence on the founding principles of this institution (Hale, 2010). This university has since served as a model for a number of private liberal colleges throughout Japan, and it is also widely recognised for its innovative approach in its ELP (Takeda, 2003). As evident from the President’s message below, this university seeks to nurture ‘global citizens’ and English is considered a ‘tool’ to attain this goal: The university was founded in 1953 to serve God and humanity. For more than half a century, it has nurtured graduates who contribute to peaceful coexistence in the world. The university offers a thorough liberal arts education in Japanese and English, with emphasis on dis­ cussion in small classes. Its global stand and holistic instruction integrate basic and specialised academic knowledge. (Message from the President, University Guide, 2010) Located on the outskirts of Tokyo, this university aims to build a global community where people from diverse ethnic and religious backgrounds gather together.The university strives to create a bilingual community, and 40% of the courses are offered in English by both Japanese and nonJapanese faculty alike. The academic year starts in April, similar to other Japanese universities, but overseas students or returnees (kikokushijo) are also accepted in September, which is not a common practice in Japan. This institution is famous for its bilingual identity, and graduates and alumni are expected to be fluent in the English language and well versed in some aspects of Western culture. Unlike other private universities in Japan, the campus environment is multicultural, and English is used on a daily basis as means of communication not only in classes but also in other interactions between students and faculty. The institution was founded with three ‘commitments’: an academic commitment, an international commitment and a Christian commitment. This university has accordingly pursued academic excellence to ‘nurture leaders who have matured as individuals to contribute in solving world problems’ (Bulletin of the College of Liberal Arts, 2014: 3).

The Research Design  53

This private university is, however, no exception in having to go through a restructuring of its entire organisation, including its curriculum, in response to current social, demographical and economic national pressures. In 2008, a new curriculum was implemented. According to the new reform, first-year students do not have to decide their majors until the end of their second year. Students have 31 areas to choose from in the humanities, social sciences and natural sciences. This initiative is an attractive selling point for the university, especially to those high school students who would prefer more time to decide their field of interest. The university has several required college-wide programmes. One of these is the ELP, which is required for students matriculating in April, for whom English is a second language. The purpose of the rigorous two-year language programme (as noted as early as 1953 in what was then called Bulletin of C University: 18) is to bring the students’ language abilities up to a standard where they can pursue their studies ‘at a level adequate for scholarly research and intelligent discussion with educated English speaking people’. The programme teaches English for academic purposes, with a focus on ‘critical thinking’. The founder and former director of the ELP, Yoshioka, defined ‘critical thinking’ as: the ability to critically assess an argument by questioning whether examples are validly employed, whether the development of the argument is coherent, whether the argument is developed without gaps in the logic, and whether evidence is convincing. To think critically means to closely read the materials, analyse them and evaluate them in terms of the writer’s biases and our own. This ability is required in all academic disciplines as the foundational skill for higher education at university. The concept of critical thinking appears many times in the university’s promotional brochures, leaflets, posters and student handbook, as well as in the staff handbook. As one faculty member stated: ‘the aim here is not only to teach English, but also to equip students with fundamental thinking skills to establish a foundation for liberal arts’. In short, the ELP is an introduction to liberal arts, in that the aim is to teach the skills necessary for students to read, write and think critically about their world.1 One pedagogical example would be its emphasis on academic writing. This is based on the understanding that writing can be enhanced only when students have something meaningful to say. If students are to produce any writing of value, it should be founded on a critical examination of the topic. Critical thinking becomes all the more relevant for first-year students when we consider the learning culture that these students come from. As will become apparent from the stories of the students, the principles of critical thinking that the university emphasises have significant implications for the students’ self-identities.

54  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

The students This co-ed university has been able to attract top-level students from all over Japan as well as from abroad. The number of students enrolled in the 2009 academic year was approximately 600 (according to the ‘Fact Sheet 2014’, published by the university for promotional purposes), which is similar to previous years. The majority of the students come from economic­ally prosperous families whose parents are, for the most part, highly educated, and who are eager to provide their children with a good language education. In general, the students are characterised as being ‘highly academic’, ‘pro­ ficient in English’, ‘hard working’ and ‘intelligent’. As mentioned above, there are two groups of students: those admitted in April and those admitted in September. The former consists of students who have received their education through the mainstream Japanese educational system. The latter consists mainly of returnees, or students who attended international schools in Japan, and thus have experienced the British, American, Canadian or Australian educational system. These students are almost always exempted from the ELP but, depending on their proficiency in Japanese, they are required to take courses in the JLP (Japanese Language Program) instead. The ‘April students’ are divided into small classes of approximately 20 students based upon their English proficiency. There are three levels, A–C. Each class is designated for a particular ‘sections’ and the students (in general) stay in the same section throughout their first year. These ‘sections’ are intended to create a sense of unity and a unique kind of learning community; indeed, students refer to sekume (the Japanese abbreviation for ‘section mates’, which is equivalent to the English ‘classmates’). Furthermore, as the programme is quite rigorous during the first year, these ‘sections’ serve as a form of support, not only in academic work but often with personal matters too. While the students are, in general, highly motivated to study English at the time of matriculation, as we will see in later chapters, some students become discouraged, which may lead to withdrawal from the university.

Summary of the two-year ELP curriculum The aim of the ELP is to enculturate the students in the liberal arts tradition, as well as to raise students’ competence in comprehending and producing spoken and written English, to the level where they can fully participate in bilingual academic activities. In order to further this goal, all ELP classes are conducted in English and the students are instructed to communicate in English. This is unique in Japanese – other universities are unable to maintain their bilingual stance to this degree. There are a variety of classes, each with specific learning outcomes. Table 4.1 summarises the offerings in the two-year ELP.

The Research Design  55

Table 4.1  Overview of the two-year ELP curriculum Course title

Description

First year Academic Reading and Writing (ARW)

Focus on critical reading and writing essays

Reading Content Analysis (RCA)

Focus on reading academic articles

Narrative Presentation (NP)

A series of lectures on topics covered in the ARW and RCA courses

Communicative Strategies (CS)

Skills-oriented course comprising academic listening and note-taking (ALN), listening strategies and skills (LSS), academic speaking and presentation (ASP), pronunciation, academic listening strategies (ALS), vocabulary building (VB) and communicative media (CM)

Second year Sophomore English (SE)

A theme-based course on a variety of topics

Theme Writing (TW)

A course on writing a research paper

From ‘Fact Sheet 2010’, a promotional material published by the university.

Narrative presentation Academic reading and writing (tutorials)

Reading content analysis (tutorials) Communicative strategies

Academic listening and note-taking

Communicative media

Academic speaking and presentation

Pronunciation Listening strategies and skills

Figure 4.1  The first-year ELP curriculum

Academic listening strategies

Vocabulary building

56  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

The two first-year core courses, ARW and RCA (see Table 4.1 and Figure 4.1), are supplemented by a series of lectures known as narrative presentation (NP). There are also seven skills-oriented courses (referred to as communicative strategies, CS): ASP, ALN, ALS, LSS, pronunciation, vocabulary building and communicative media. The core courses are further supported by a series of one-to-one tutorials with their instructors, offered several times during the term (see Table 4.2). The core courses use in-house materials. All courses are taught by a team of 28 full-time teachers and five part-time teachers (‘Fact Sheet 2010’). Out of the 28 full-timers, 18 are non-Japanese, from countries around the world, including the United States, Canada, Britain, Ireland and Australia. The university prides itself on its diversity of teachers, as one out of three in the ELP are non-Japanese. The large number of full-time teachers, as well as the diversity of nationalities, is unusual for a Japanese university. Out of a total of 136 credits required for graduation, 22 credits are allotted to the ELP courses, of which 18 are to be completed during the first year. This amounts to a total of eight 70-minute classes per week, for a total

Table 4.2  Example of a first-year student’s ELP class schedule Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

1st period











2nd period

Reading Tutorial content and analysis (RCA)

Reading content and analysis (RCA)

(General education)

(General education)

3rd period

(General education)

(General education)

(General education)

Academic reading and writing (ARW)

4th period

Academic – reading and writing (ARW)

Communicative – media (CM)

Listening strategies and skills (LSS)

5th period

Narrative presentation (NP)



Academic reading and writing (ARW)



(General education)

6th period







(General education)

Tutorial

7th period













Note: General education is a non-ELP course.

The Research Design  57

of 30 weeks during the first academic year. The academic year is divided into three 10-week terms: spring (April–June), autumn (September–November) and winter (December–February). Table 4.2 presents an example of a firstyear student’s class schedule. I will now roughly describe a typical class following this curriculum. This background information is vital to an understanding of the learning experiences of my participants and in order to contextualise their stories: how they feel about their experiences, how they regard themselves as members of this learning community. A core class such as ARW or RCA focus on one theme at a time. Each content unit typically lasts for three to four weeks, allowing for two or three topics per term. A topic may be introduced first in NP, to provide basic background knowledge. Various lecturers may present different viewpoints on the same issue, which is done to help students think critically. These lectures also provide excellent opportunities for students to enhance, for instance, their listening ability, or to practise taking notes in English. At the next stage of a content unit, students read various related academic texts. They are expected to think critically about them and prepare to discuss them in class. Students are often asked to present their ideas orally and sometimes in conjunction to write down their reactions. The culminating activity of the three- or four-week topic cycle is to synthesise their understandings in the form of an academic essay.

The Study English Abroad (SEA) programme The curriculum is further strengthened by SEA programme. Firstand second-year students are able to take part in this six-week overseas programme during the summer break, at universities located in the United States, the UK, Canada, New Zealand and Australia. The aim of the SEA programme is for students to study English while experiencing a different culture. Each year almost 80 students (out of about 500) apply and participate. The programme varies from site to site but, on the whole, includes a mixture of language skills classes and project-based language learning. The SEA programme at these sites has been built in collaboration with the university, and students are able to fulfil a portion of their ELP unit requirements.

The Participants Selection process The first step in carrying out my research was to recruit participants. During the second week of April, the start of the academic year in Japan, flyers (see Figure 4.2) were sent to approximately 80 first-year students, asking

58  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Figure 4.2  The flyer used to recruit participants to the study

those interested to sign up. About 30 students responded in the affirmative, whereupon a detailed description of the research was sent out electronically. The number of volunteers was far more than expected. I suspect that this was because they were all first-year students, who are generally considered to be more eager than their seniors to engage in the activities of their new environment. After reviewing the details of what the research entailed, 12 students were still interest in participating, although some expressed their concerns about the logistics of the interview schedule and specifically about

The Research Design  59

Table 4.3  Participants’ profiles (names are pseudonyms) Name

Gender

Past English language learning experiences

Experiences abroad before college

Sayaka

F

From pre-school (nursery/ kindergarten)

Two-week study-abroad programme

Maki

F

From pre-school (nursery/ kindergarten)

International school in Bangladesh for three years

Megumi

F

From pre-school (nursery/ kindergarten)

None

Yui

F

From elementary school

None

Hinako

F

From junior high school

None

Takehiro

M

From junior high school

Two-week study-abroad programme

finding the time to participate during their very demanding first year. It was suggested that they come for an exploratory interview session in order to make their decision. Eight finally decided to participate in the study: five women and three men, ranging in age from 18 to 20. However, during the course of the study two participants withdrew, at different points of the term, because they were no longer able to come for the interviews or to continue with their journal entries. As a result, I followed six participants – five female students and one male student (Table 4.3). A more balanced sample in terms of gender would have been ideal, although the university does tend to have more female students enrolled. Three female students participated in the SEA programme. Another female student took part in a service-learning programme managed by a private organisation and spent her summer in Thailand (details of the SEA programme will be outlined later in this chapter). The two remaining participants, one female and one male, remained in Japan during the summer. Although the research does not focus on comparing or contrasting the two groups – students who went abroad during the summer versus those who stayed in the country – obviously, the impact that experiences abroad have on students’ views of English, and on themselves, cannot be ignored. While purposive sampling might have been of advantage here, logistically it was impossible in my context, partly because, given the large number of students applying for the SEA programme each year, students were selected by a lottery that took place at the beginning of May.

60  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Data Collection The principal means of collecting data was via a series of interviews over one academic year, complemented by participants’ weekly reflections, several audio-recorded interactions of their discussions in class, weekly email exchanges during their six-week summer SEA programme and comments from their teachers, as well as my field notes. My reason for opting to focus on oral interviews was that my participants’ descriptions of their language learning trajectory were not based only on retrospective after-the-fact accounts, but also on their ongoing experiences – what Benson (2014) calls ‘concurrent interviewing’ – as they took part in this university’s first-year ELP. The research design was ongoing, which permitted me to evaluate and adjust my strategies during the months in which the fieldwork was carried out. For instance, although not originally intended, I decided to interview my participants at the end of the academic year to round out the data collected earlier in the year. The interviews were complemented by students’ weekly reflections, recordings of their interactions in group discussions in class and weekly email exchanges during their SEA programme. The use of multiple methods is important. While interviews may be sufficient to obtain information on the participants’ lives, they may be insufficient for the researcher to construct a richer story, as the narrative dimension (e.g. time, place and social context) may be ‘airbrushed’, and not do justice to the phenomena of interest. As Casanave states: Like other kinds of qualitative research, narrative inquiry also depends on close observation of people in their settings, detailed descriptions, and the writing and collecting of many kinds of field texts such as notes, journals, letters, and transcripts of interviews. However, the intent is to listen, to record, and construct stories of lived experience within the narrative dimensions of time, place and personal–social relationship. (Casanave, 2005: 22)

Narrative interviews The principal source of data was a series of semi-structured interviews with the participants. In a sense, the structured and unstructured dimension of an interview is problematic, and there appear to be various views on what counts as structured or unstructured. The interviews employed in this study were ‘semi-structured’ in that the researcher did not have a list of questions but rather a range of topics or issues to be covered. Careful attention was paid in order not to close down any subjects the participants appeared to be interested in pursuing, since only they could know what was important to them at the time of the interview.

The Research Design  61

The form and the frequency of interviews (Table 4.4) were decided based on the findings of a preliminary study conducted six months earlier. All inter­views took place in my office, mainly simply for convenience. Although academics such as Atkinson (1998) have commented that the setting for an interview should be familiar to the interviewee, in order to facilitate an extended, more relaxed and open conversation, practical issues took precedence. Since the language in which the interviews are conducted is inherently related to the co-constructed nature of the interview process in narrative studies, the participants were given a choice, but none opted for English. The language used in all the interviews was thus Japanese. One of my main concerns in carrying out free-flowing (semi-structured) interviews was the feasibility of doing so in the Japanese context. I was doubtful about the prospects of collecting a substantial amount of data interviewing Japanese students, who are generally considered to be reserved in expressing their opinions, especially in front of ‘strangers’. Some may even consider it ‘threatening’. In light of the above, in my preliminary study I decided to conduct two forms of interview: semi-structured and more open-ended. The aim was to determine the feasibility, or practicality, of an unstructured form of interview in my context. Observations noted from this ‘experiment’ were quite different from my expectations. I found that with learners in my particular context, the latter approach tended to generate richer data than the former – ‘richer’ in the sense that during the discussions there were more transactions between the participant and myself, with topics extending to areas that were not originally intended or anticipated. In other words, in the former situation, participants tended to respond only to the questions posed by the researcher, whereas in the latter they appeared to feel freer to talk about a topic. Of course, it is possible to explain the differences in these two groups of interviews as a matter of personal style, or rapport, or in terms of a distinct Japanese interactional style, but it appears that the manner in which the questions were framed was equally as important in eliciting responses from the participants (Miyahara, 2008). Having ascertained that a ‘semi-structured’ type of interview was preferable for this study, I next prepared a list of topics to be covered with my participants. This led the discussions in unexpected directions, which was advantageous, as the aim was to obtain ‘stories’ emerging from the participants themselves. As Riessmann has noted ‘narratives often emerge when you least expect them’ (Riessmann, 1993: 56). The less structured form of interviews, in consequence, gave greater control to the respondents. At each phase (sets of interviews 1–5), I conducted over 35 one-to-one interviews, with six to eight participants, over a period of 10 weeks. At times, the interviews could have gone on for some time; however, for practical reasons, they were kept to within an hour and a half as much as possible. The topics covered in the interviews are outlined in Table 4.4. As noted

62  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

Table 4.4  The five sets of interviews Interview

When

Topics

1. Initial interview

Last week of April

Demographic information (e.g. place of birth, age, gender, first language, family, education history, experiences living abroad). ‘First encounters’ with English, as far back as they could recall (e.g. what was their first English topics/ words that they remember? What was the situation at that time of life for the participant? Impressions of English) English learning experience (when?, where?, formally or informally?, how long?, impressions, attitudes, beliefs about learning English, etc.)

2. Interim interview

Last week of Reactions to the comments in their weekly journals May/first week Asking about or clarifying details that emerged from of June the transcripts of the initial interview Impressions or comments about the participants’ first two months in the programme or campus life in general

3. Third interview

End of June

Comments about their language learning experience during the first term at the institution Language learning goals or aims for the remaining three and a half years at the institution If any, possible visions of the future, and how they could relate to learning a foreign language For students participating in the six-week overseas programme, what they expect from the programme, how they feel about it, etc.

4. Fourth interview, for participants who had gone abroad during the summer

Upon their return at the beginning of September

An open-ended talk about the impressions of their experiences of their six-week programme abroad: about their language learning experiences; cultural differences they encountered, if any

5. A final interview

End of the academic year

Open-ended talks about their impressions of their life in their new learning environment; their plans for the future, etc.

The Research Design  63

earlier, I was careful to conduct the interviews so that the data generated would be the result of the collaborative efforts between myself and the participants. For example, in asking them to reflect on their language learning experiences, it would have been possible for me to use the term ‘language learning experience’ (gogaku gakushu keiken) but, instead, the participants took part in an exploration and negotiation in constructing the meaning of the term with the researcher. This is not a straightforward procedure. For most participants, providing accounts of their English learning meant having to go back at least six or seven years. Reporting or recalling experiences varied from one individual to another, and the process was at times complicated, because information or knowledge was occasionally more tacit than explicit and therefore, generally, difficult for them to express. If we are to understand such a complex, ambiguous and taken-for-granted concept that can be deeply embedded in consciousness such as a language learning experience, researchers need to collaborate with the participants in constructing their understanding of their experiences, and bringing those experiences to the forefront of their consciousness in order for them to give explicit accounts of their situations. In one of the interviews, a participant

Figure 4.3  An example of the participants’ graphic representation of themselves, placing a face in the centre of a sheet of paper

64  Emerging Self-Identities and Emotion in Foreign Language Learning

in this study reported not ever having thought about their language learning history, since it was a taken-for-granted experience. In the second interview, instead of following the conventional questionand-answer pattern, I decided to ask the participants to make a graphic representation of themselves by placing a face in the centre of the paper (see Figure 4.3). This was used as a springboard to encourage and facilitate the conversation. These pictures were highly effective, in that they were constructive and useful in eliciting stories from the participants.

Other sources of data The main purpose of using multiple data collection methods was to complement or supplement the principal source of data – the interviews – rather than to generate more primary data. While some of the means described below did not produce sufficient data to be used in the study, they were instrumental in giving me a new perspective on the participants’ stories.

Journal entries Participants were asked to provide accounts of their impressions or reflections on a weekly basis via email. Most participants submitted their entries regularly, although a couple of them forgot, especially in June, when they were swamped with end-of-the-term papers and exams. To encourage them to send in their reflections, each week I sent out email reminders. These journal entries were open-ended and the topics were left entirely up to the participants, as I was interested in what would be generated. Some of the topics included were: their new campus life, their new language learning environments, concerns they had about their studies, their relationships with their peers and comments on the interviews. My participants were free to choose the language for writing up the journals, and they predominantly used English, with little code switching.

Audio-recordings of group discussions On two occasions, participants’ interactions in two class group dis­ cussions were audio-recorded using small digital recorder. The recordings were poor quality, and it was occasionally difficult to discern what had been said or what had transpired at the time of the recording. Therefore, it was necessary to ask the participants for clarifications in their subsequent interviews. Their teachers also provided information about what went on during the recordings. Some of these recordings were useful in suggesting how the participants were regarded by their peers and their teachers.

Weekly self-report during the six-week study-abroad programme Four of the participants went abroad over the summer. They were asked to make comments, reflect on their experiences and note their thoughts or

The Research Design  65

feelings via email. This was again open-ended. Participants could discuss any topics that were on their mind at the time of writing. To encourage them to keep writing each week, I responded with short acknowledgements.

Classroom observations Through classroom observations, I was able to obtain a general feeling of the class and to witness at first hand my participants in action. In addition, their teachers were cooperative in providing me with further information about the student and their interactions with their peers that offered insights in analysing the data.

Data organisation and data processing All the interviews were audio-recorded and transcribed in their entirety using a simplified transcription style (‘cleaned up’ style). The interviews were transcribed soon after they had taken place in order to keep as much as possible of the ‘sense’ of what was said at the time (Gillham, 2000). I undertook the transcribing myself, partly because I believe that discrepancies can exist between an interviewer and a transcriber in any given interview situation. The richness of the context could be lost with a transcriber who has little familiarity with participants, the interview content or, in some cases, particular forms of language used (Poland, 2002). Furthermore, the time-consuming task of transcribing provided the opportunity for me to familiarise myself with the data, as well as to conduct an intuitive analysis (Goodson & Sikes, 2001; Maxwell, 2005); indeed, analysis cannot easily be distinguished from transcription (Riessman, 2008). In the process of transcribing, I made notes of important points and of ideas or themes that appeared to be emerging within and across interviews. I also took notes on what was difficult to capture in the audio-recordings, such as the participants’ gestures (ones that I found interesting or unusual) during the interviews, how participants looked that day, including their attire, together with my reflections on each interview. The aim was to use these notes as supplementary resources to support any claims that might emerge in the process of analysing the data. All the interviews were conducted in Japanese. I gave the participants a free choice in this. It is often understood that the language participants choose reflects their self-identity (e.g. Block, 2006b). From personal observations as a researcher conducting numerous interviews, I agree with this viewpoint but, for my participants, ‘practicality’ appears to have been more of an issue here: ‘I think I will use Japanese because I think I can express my thoughts more accurately and fully’ (from Sayaka’s interview transcript). Translations from Japanese to English were then prepared for selected sections of the transcripts during the course of the analysis (a detailed discussion on translation issues is presented in the final chapter). The Hepburn

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system of romanisation was used to render the Japanese into alphabetic orthography. Japanese expressions or words are presented in italics. The transcripts were translated by the researcher. As I have a professional background as a Japanese-to-English translator and interpreter, I felt competent to undertake the task. However, in order to increase accuracy, these transcriptions were reviewed and cross-checked by a bilingual colleague for any errors or omissions. Discrepancies were discussed, and a more accurate/ appropriate translation was settled on. Throughout, efforts were made to explain any slight difference in nuances based on the original Japanese text. Analysis was completed on the translated English texts, but on many occasions the process involved going back to the original Japanese in order to incorporate the subtle nuances that might have been overlooked. Journal entries in Japanese were translated into English by the researcher and were then checked by a bilingual colleague. Translations were provided for pertinent sections. Recordings of the participants’ interactions in class were also reviewed and pertinent sections were summarised. Reflections sent by the participants during the six-week study-abroad programme were in a mixture of English and Japanese, indicating frequent cases of code-switching. In the latter case, translations were carried out by the researcher and reviewed by a bilingual colleague. Summaries were made of the audio-recorded informal interviews with the participants’ teachers. Pertinent sections were transcribed and translated. Again, the translations were cross-checked by a bilingual colleague.

Analysis of the Narrative Data There is a diversity of approaches to the analysis of narrative data, as with qualitative research in general (Dörnyei, 2007; Hatch, 2002; Punch, 2009; Richards, 2005). This diversity is illustrated in two collections of narrative studies, Narratives of Learning and Teaching EFL (Kalaja et al., 2008) and, more recently, Narrative Research in Applied Linguistics (Barkhuizen, 2013). The latter is particularly useful in that it provides a detailed account on how the research was conducted and analysed in a variety of contexts. Polkinghorne (1995) distinguishes between what he calls ‘analysis of narratives’ and ‘narrative analysis’. The former refers to the analytic process in which the researcher ‘gathers stories and uses paradigmatic analytic procedures to produce taxonomies and categories out of the common elements across the database’. In the latter, the researcher ‘gathers events and happenings and uses narrative analytic procedures to produce analytic stories’, and thus the outcome of narrative analysis is a story (Polkinghorne, 1995: 9). The variety of approaches signifies that there is no single right way to analyse narrative data. Rather, the analytical approach a researcher ultimately

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decides to take should be guided solely by the nature of the enquiry. My decision to take a narrative-oriented approach, to both the methodology and the analysis, rests on the conviction that ‘one of the clearest channels’ to explore and understand the inner world of the individuals ‘is through verbal accounts and stories presented by individuals about their lives and their experienced reality’ (Lieblich et al., 1998: 7), as well as the fact that it is also an effective tool to investigate and represent developments over time. Such an understanding of narrative inquiry resonates with many academics, including Barkhuizen et al., who claim that: the strength in narrative lies in its focus on how people use stories to make sense of their experience in areas of inquiry where it is important to understand phenomena from the perspective of those who experience it. (Barkhuizen et al., 2014: 2) The diversity of approaches to narrative analysis also signifies the relevance and importance of establishing solid epistemological underpinnings to one’s research. The lack of firm philosophical positioning that serves to guide one’s research would be akin to a ‘tree’ (Egbert & Sanden, 2014: 11) that is barely able to stand without its roots firmly grounded in the soil. For example, as Dörnyei claims that qualitative (narrative) research is ‘fundamentally interpretative, which means the research outcome is ultimately the product of the researcher’s subjective interpretation of data’ (Dörnyei, 2007: 38). This makes sense only if one rejects the positivist belief in ‘Truth’ (not ‘a truth or multiple truths’) (Egbert & Sanden, 2014: 20). Rather, ‘instead of pretending to be objective, the stance of qualitative researchers [including narrative researchers] is to concentrate on flexibility, applying their own subjective in ways that make it possible to understand the tacit motives and assumptions of their participants’ (Hatch, 2002: 9). Thus, establishing one’s epistemological positioning or, in Barkhuizen’s terms, ‘exploring [one’s] epistemological and methodological [self]’ (Barkhuizen, 2011: 410), is a crucial factor in conducting and analysing narrative research. Otherwise narrative research can easily appear to lack rigour at all stages of the research. The theoretical foundations provide purpose and direction as well as coherence to the study. To this end, Barkhuizen’s ‘four variables’ are a helpful guideline for researchers (Barkhuizen, 2011: 410): • narrative knowing – knowing about narrative research in terms of its theoretical underpinnings; • narrative doing – knowing about narrative methodologies; • narrative applying – knowing how to do research on a practical, procedural level; • narrative feeling – researchers’ affective responses to their narrative work.

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Constructing the Analytical Model This research situates its philosophical approach to its analysis within the constructivist perspective on narratives (Gubrium & Holstein, 2002), where the focus is more on the how questions as opposed to the what questions. According to Frost: ‘Naturalist’ approaches use rich descriptions of people in their natural habitats [whereas] ‘constructivist’ approaches focus on how a sense of order is created through talk and interactions. (Frost, 2011: 95) The ‘what’ questions include ‘what happened?’ and ‘what were the experiences people had?’, while the ‘how’ questions include ‘how do the participants make sense of their experiences?’, ‘how do the participants position themselves while telling their stories?’ and ‘how does the interpersonal and/or social relationship shape the making of the stories?’ (Frost, 2011). The questions pertaining to the discursive positioning of the participants and the researchers is, in fact, an important factor in the constructivist approach to analysing data. This is one of the main points of discussion in analysing narratives, in conjunction with the reflexivity of the researcher, as I elaborate later in this chapter. Having thus situated the theoretical underpinnings of my research, it is necessary to caution readers that any ‘analytical model’ will oversimplify the empirical practices of narrative analysis. Nonetheless, after qualitative researchers have collected their data, they are faced with a series of questions. How do I make sense of the mountain of data I have collected? How exactly do I analyse my data? How and where do I start? My purpose in providing a framework that summarises the analytical procedure of this research is, first, to offer a guide to how the analysis was carried out and, second, to give transparency to the process of attempting to offer some insightful order to the multiple accounts of human experiences that my participants brought to the research site. There is no one-size-fits-all type of model to narrative analysis. Different models of narrative analysis are used to respond to different features of the narratives and to contribute to the answering of different questions. The precise framework used will naturally depend on the particular enquiry, but in any narrative analysis the essential point is the subjective and reflexive involvement of the researcher in the analysis. Obviously, a critical and reflective approach is always necessary. Another important issue is how ‘sensitivity’ (Mann, 2011) can be fed into or reflected in the analysis and representation of the data. Whether narrative or not, identifying common themes is a common approach to the analysis of qualitative data. In fact, much of the criticism of the analysis of narrative data centres on its heavy reliance on thematic analysis. Thematic analysis is not a straightforward process, but an intricate

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and complex process that requires much deliberation when the trans­parency and rigour of the research work are at stake. Pavlenko was one of the first in applied linguistics to point out the potential problems in using thematic analysis in narrative research. These include (Pavlenko, 2007: 166–167): • lack of theoretical premises; • lack of established procedures for matching instances to categories; • over-reliance on repeated instances, which may lead analysts to overlook important events or themes that do not occur repeatedly or that do not fit into pre-established schemes; • an exclusive focus on what is in the text, whereas what is excluded may be as or even more informative; • lack of attention to the ways storytellers use language to interpret ex­ periences and position themselves as particular kinds of people. Critical remarks on the reliance on narrative content (or what some refer to as ‘big stories’) in narrative enquiry can, however, be misleading. As Riessman (2008) argues, there is a ‘general misconception that the thematic approach appears to be rather simple, intuitive and straight­forward, [but it] only serves to show how methodical and painstaking analysis can be’. Thematic analysis arose in response to the structural model proposed by Labov and Waletzky (1967), where narratives are understood as texts that function as a representation of past events, in the form of a story (Patterson, 2008). Thematic analysis is based on what Polkinghorne (1995) characterises as ‘paradigmatic analysis’, where the researcher starts the analysis by open coding of the data, building a set of themes by searching for patterns and meaning produced in the data, and then labelling and grouping them in connection with the theoretical framework of the research (e.g. Miles & Huberman, 1994; Richards, 2005; Silverman, 2006; Strauss & Corbin, 2008). According to Barkhuizen et al. (2014), there are, in general, three ­strategies in thematic analysis, and the choice of which to use should reflect the nature of the research enquiry: Strategy 1: Themes are determined in advance. Strategy 2: Themes are allowed to emerge as analysis proceeds. Strategy 3: An approach that lies between the two above. However, the distinction between these strategies is fuzzy. For instance, one could start out with the first approach to thematic analysis, but could end up with ‘discovering’ new categories or subthemes. This is illustrated in Gao’s study of a paraplegic language learner’s autobiography, where Gao employs the first strategy at the outset of his study, but also identifies several subthemes that were not pre-established (Gao, 2010; cited in Barkhuizen et al., 2014).

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Although the thematic approach can link data extracts to abstract concepts and provide understanding and interpretation of the research enquiries, as well as a coherent analytical lens to all the data used in a research study, many may, as I do, still have reservations. As has been commonly discussed in the literature, the strict use of thematic analysis is limited in revealing the meanings or interpretations embedded in narratives. Another frequently cited argument is the danger of decontextualising narratives by paying less attention to the broader historical, sociocultural and institutional narratives, as well as to the interactional factors that shape the context of the narration (Riessman, 2008). An additional drawback to thematic analysis that is often pointed out is the degree to which the ‘narrative character’ is lost in the process of analysis. Drawing on Polkinghorne (1995:15), Barkhuizen et al. maintain that: thematic procedures have the ‘capacity to develop general knowledge about a collection of stories’, but the knowledge that it produces is ‘abstract and formal, and by necessity underplays the unique and particular aspects of each story’. (Barkhuizen et al., 2014: 81) In order to minimise the loss of the ‘narrative character’, Polkinghorne (1995) proposes ‘narrative analysis’ as the analytical tool (see above), where narrative writing is employed as an approach in analysing narrative data. The most widely used approach in language learning research is analysis of narrative (rather than narrative analysis), and the approach taken in this study is akin to analysis of narrative, as it also starts out with thematic analysis, to allow any underlying themes to emerge. As one resolution to the thematic approach, researchers such as Riessman (1993, 2008), Mishler (1995) and Denzin (2001) suggest the interactionalperformative model as an alternative. Riessman introduces of a typology of four different ways of dealing with narrative analysis: the thematic analysis, the structural analysis, the dialogic/interactional-performative analysis and the visual analysis. The most widely used analytic strategy is thematic analysis, which concentrates on what is being said rather than how. Structural analysis, on the other hand, focuses on how the narrative is told. The dialogic/interactional-performative analysis includes aspects of both the thematic and structural analysis, and explores how talk is interactively produced and performed. In visual analysis, images are the main data to be analysed. As Riessman notes, these four approaches are not mutually exclusive but overlap and ‘in practice, can be adapted or combined’ (Riessman, 2008: 18).2 In the process of analysing the data, many researchers find themselves theme-coding before proceeding to the structural analysis. In my opinion, the distinction between the what in thematic analysis and the how in the structural model is vague, since, while developing the ­categories, researchers are bound to find themselves analysing the structural

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and contextual elements that constitute the narratives. However, the distinctive feature of the interactional-performative approach is its understanding of narratives as co-constructions between the narrator and the researcher. It regards stories as a social product composed in interaction that is historic­ ally and institutionally situated in a certain discursive context. Mishler sees interview interactions as ‘a dialogic process, a complex situation through which interviewer and the interviewee negotiate’ (Mishler, 1999: xvi). Viewing interviews as an active site suggests that meaning is created and performed (Denzin, 2001). The meanings are contextualised and improvised in a conversational performance. Indeed, the interview, as stated in the previous chapter, is not simply an information-gathering exercise, but also a performance where both the researcher and the participant transform information into a shared experience, or what some would call ‘knowledge’. Such an understanding raises some issues. How is the narrative co-constructed? How does the interaction between the researcher and the narrator shape the process? What are the historical and cultural factors that shape the process? How do the positions of the researcher and of the narrator influence the construction and interpretation of the story? Placing the collaborative meaning-making process at the centre of narrative analysis, as is done in the interactional-performative model, therefore has multitudes of ramifications at the analysis stage. As we have seen, and as many scholars have argued, a mere theme coding or categorisation is not enough. Researchers need to ‘negotiate an appropriation of Riessman’s thematic and structural approach as they move towards a dialogic/performative approach’ (Block, 2009: 342). In the ‘analysis of narrative’ approach, the analytical first step is to conduct a series of thematic data analyses. The next step is to examine these themes (content), or what, in terms of ‘how narratives are organized … to achieve a narrator’s strategic aims’ (Riessman, 2008: 77). The third step is to explore how stories are ‘coproduced in a complex choreography – in spaces between teller and listener, speaker and setting, text and reader, history and culture’ (Riessman, 2008: 105). In other words, what is said should be examined with respect to how participants position themselves, and are positioned in the course of interaction, which should then be considered at a broader level, to encompass larger social constructs, such as identities or social groups: There is, therefore, a position that what is needed is dialectic analysis which slides back and forth, between and among three general inter­ acting levels: micro: at the level of utterances, examining how what is said is said. meso: at the intermediate level of positioning in the narrative, via the adoption of voices. macro: at the broader, more macro-level, whereby what is said is related to identities and social groups in society. (Block, 2009: 342)

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The Analytical Model In the previous section, I outlined the issues that should be taken into account in constructing an analytical model. However, the question remains: how can these issues be addressed and manifested in one coherent framework? This section presents a model that describes my attempt to takes into account not only the content (what) and form (how), but also the context, which ranges from the micro-local to the macro-global, and which examines practice across space and time. Regardless of the method one uses to collect data (interviews, journals, etc.), most qualitative data is transformed into textual form first and the analysis is, thus, conducted with words. In this respect, qualitative data analysis is largely a language-based analysis (Dörnyei, 2007). The analysis of my research takes into consideration the language-specific nature of narrative analysis, and the analytical model presented in this chapter takes into account the implications this approach may have for the analysis of narrative data. As Riesmann (2008) and many others have noted, narrative analysis is an iterative process: there is no particular moment when data analysis begins. Thus, although, as outlined below, the data analysis took place essentially in three phrases, following a six-step procedure, it is important to note that the process did not always occur in a linear fashion, as the steps overlapped and quite often I found myself moving back and forth in a cyclical manner. Since the data is inherently language based, I also found it helpful to examine the language in certain parts of the transcript from an ethno-methodological perspective. This kind of merging of naturalistic and ethno-methodological perspectives is now common among narrative researchers. Naturally, the guiding principle throughout the whole process was to view the data as a product of interaction between the participant and me, or between the participant and their teachers or classmates. In other words, while ensuring that the participant was the focus of analysis, I nevertheless had to keep in mind that the stories or events presented in the transcripts and field notes were always co-produced with others in a specific temporal and spatial context. This included what Bamberg and Georgakopoulou (2008) refer to as ‘how the characters in the story are positioned in relation to others; how speakers construct themselves and others in terms of teller roles and dominant discourses’ (cited in Barkhuizen, 2013: 84).

Phase 1: Descriptive stage The central purpose of the two-step process in Phase 1 was to provide analytical tools to engage with the data, that is, to involve me in an analytic dialogue with each line of the transcripts. The main idea was to produce various forms of secondary data, such as memos (this is generally known as

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‘memoing’ or producing ‘analytic memos’ or ‘working ideas’). In addition, summaries of the participants’ accounts were drawn up as short vignettes on matters that appeared to be representative. The process or writing up notes helped me not only to engage in the data, but also to reflect on it, which helped me in shaping and developing my thinking. At each phase, the aim was to ‘push’ the analysis to a more interpretative level. In Phase 1, the purpose was to attach provisional or code labels (Step 2, below) to the marked sections or segments from the data that linked to key concepts in this research, such as ‘language learning experiences’, ‘embarrassment’ and ‘changing identities’.

Step 1: Preliminary reading and re-reading This step involved reading and re-reading of the processed interview data, the recordings of the participants’ interactions in class, their weekly journals and the email exchanges during their six weeks abroad. My first round of reading was to obtain a general sense of the data. As I read and re-read the transcripts, I would reflect and note down my thoughts in the margins, and make notes in my researcher’s journal. Sometimes I would bracket parts of the text that appeared significant or highlight parts that I found interesting and relevant to my research questions. Passages that were not directly related to the immediate focus area, but parts that appeared potentially interesting, were also noted. But at this stage, the pre-coding deliberation was conducted in a relatively free-flowing manner. In short, this was the pre-coding stage, which gave way to a more structured coding process in the next stage.

Step 2: Exploratory noting (initial coding) Researchers code their data in various ways. One example is the threetier coding in grounded theory suggested by Strauss and Corbin (2008). I opted to take a more generic approach, by drawing on Smith et al. (2009). Accordingly, the data was, thus, first examined mainly via four discrete processes: Descriptive comments The focus was on the content of what the participant had said, to identify the subject of the talk. The aim was to take things at face value, highlighting items that most likely were structuring the participant’s thoughts and experiences. An attempt was made to use the words or phrases from the actual passages to maintain ‘authenticity’ in the codes as much as possible (similar to ‘in vivo’ coding in grounded theory). Linguistic comments The focus was on examining the specific use of language by the participant. For instance, attention was paid to pronoun use or the functional

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Table 4.5  An example of a straightforward coding (from an interview with Sayaka) Statement

Code

I really disliked my English classes [dislike] at junior high school

Notes Does she not like English, her teacher, her English classes, the textbook? What are its implications?

aspects of the language that are characteristic of the Japanese language. As a result, translation issues were particularly relevant (the final chapter gives a more detailed discussion of the translation dilemmas). For example, one of the most distinctive features of the Japanese language is the extensive use of its honorifics. Honorifics are used to signal not only one’s gender, but also one’s social status, as well as the relationship between interlocutors. In translating the transcripts, special attention was also paid to linguistic features such as expressions and words that appeared repeatedly. The metaphorical expression ‘nareru’ (get used to) was one such example. The origins of the word and how it was used in the discourse were examined in relation to the Japanese learning culture (Berendt, 2008; Rohlen & LeTrende, 1998). Emotive comments The focus was on expressions that were used to show some kind of ‘emotions’. The discourse analytic principles of content analysis (Glaser & Strauss, 1968) were used to identify emotive content. For instance, emotionally loaded words such as ‘suki dewanai’ (dislike of objects, ideas, etc.) were frequently used in the interviews. The frequency of emotive content evident throughout the transcripts made me acutely aware that we should not downplay the emotional processes that are at work in the participants’ language learning experiences. An example of a straightforward coding is given in Table 4.5. Conceptual comments The focus was on engaging at a more interrogative and conceptual level. The aim here was to arrive at a more ‘abstract’ idea or construct, at a more conceptual level.

Phase 2: Interpretative data, grouping prominent themes Step 3: Emergent themes The next step was to identify emergent themes, or what is considered coding. Some of what was involved in this step overlapped with Step 2 (above). As mentioned earlier, in any qualitative research data interpretation is an iterative process. In looking for emergent themes, I searched for interrelationships, or connections and patterns between exploratory notes. This sometimes involved comparing and contrasting data (Corbin & Strauss,

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2008) to see if they could be grouped together to form one meaningful category. Identifying themes involved examining discrete chunks of the transcript in addition to recalling of what was learned in the process of initial coding. Having labelled the significant parts of the data in the previous step, the next step was to categorise them in terms of the contextual features that gave them meaning: Categorizing is a process whereby previously unitized data are organized into categories that provide descriptive and inferential information about the context or setting from which units were derived. (Lincoln & Guba, 1985: 203) Needless to say, this step requires careful consideration of the situation and the interaction, and of what is said or what transpires in those exchanges. The procedure was concluded by attaching code labels or names. These labels originated mainly from the research questions and prior work done in the area, although this did not prevent me from coding unexpected and interesting findings in the data. Throughout the process, I was acutely aware of the temptation to bring everything together within a single central theme but, at the same time, I also recognised the possibility of having situated multiple meanings that could be inherent in one code.

Step 4: Connections between themes (categorisation) The next step was to search for relationships between the coded themes. Although there is no predetermined or prescribed way to look for patterns and connections between emergent themes, I followed some of the tactics used widely in qualitative analysis (Lincoln & Guba, 1985; Miles & Hubermann, 1994), such as abstraction, subsumption, polarisation, contextualisation, numeration and function. Sub-categories and other categories related to the core categories were combined. Meaning units were employed as the unit of analysis. Ratner states that: The meaning unit must preserve the psychological integrity of the idea being expressed. It must neither fragment the idea into meaningless, truncated segments nor confuse it with other ideas that express different themes. (Ratner, 2002: 169) Thus, coherent, related comments in the interviews were coded as one meaning unit. Although there was the option of using qualitative data analysis software at this stage, as Goodson and Sikes (2001) have commented, I decided that ‘intimate engagement’ with the data was an important step in the process of analysis, and did not feel the need to use any computer-assisted data management software.

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Box 4.1  Example of data analysis in Step 4 (connections between themes – categorisation): Sayaka Language learning experience: • Exposed to English from a very early age (her mother was a Japanese English teacher at a local junior high school; accompanied her mother to her English conversation classes, where Sayaka had opportunities to ‘interact’ with native English speakers). Attitude or views towards English: • Prior to entering junior high school, ‘English’ was something that she had enjoyed ‘using’; at school, she was experiencing negative feelings towards it. • English as means for communication vs school subject?

An example of my analysis in Step 4 is presented in Box 4.1. At this step of my analysis, I also made extensive notes from the relevant research literature, and used it to link the ideas in the literature with what the narratives were telling me.

Phase 3: Connecting and going beyond Step 5: Referring to existing literature Each of the themes which emerged from the data was investigated against current research literature, a process that I had begun working on in Phase 2. The purpose was to see how the themes that had emerged in Step 4 were related to current language learning theories, and how the categories that had emerged provided answers to the questions posed in this study. For instance, as the themes were identified and investigated against the

Box 4.2  Extract from the research notes: The Ideal L2 self See Dörnyei (2005, 2009). Derives from the idea of possible selves in psychology. The connection between language learning and one’s vision of the future: how is it related? Can the vision be created? Is it fixed? How do emotions and identity factor into this process?

Emotions: see Pavlenko (2005).

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literature, it became clear that the concept of ‘the L2 possible self ’, and in particular ‘the Ideal L2 self ’, would be a forceful means of interpreting the data. An extract of my notes is given in Box 4.2. Referring to the sociohistorical framework, and even to the broader international context, became particularly relevant at this point. To this end, I found the dialogic/performative approach (Riessman, 2008) to be useful in order to understand the identified themes at a broader level, where the ‘what’ is related to larger social constructs, such as identities and social groups (Block, 2009). Details from a wider perspective offer a way to con­textual­ise the effect this may have. Moving back and forth between immediate and wider contexts, I was able to understand the relationship between the themes with more clarity. The final task in Step 5 was to compose a ‘story’ based on the patterns, themes and theoretical insights that were generated in the process of analysis (see below). The iterative process of going back and forth helped to reinforce the relationship between theory and the practical framework, which then facilitated a more coherent methodology. Throughout the analysis, the interpretation of the data was generally an individual activity. Academics such as Silverman (2006) recommend that data should be returned to the informant for ‘respondent validation’. As discussed in Chapter 3, however, this research follows Block (2006b), where interviews are considered as one-off event with the respondents at a specific time and place in a certain context. Providing them with the transcripts at a different time would only offer them opportunities to examine that particular interaction in a different light, one that is not necessarily coherent with the original interview.

Step 6: Reflectivity of the researcher In order to maintain methodological transparency in data analysis, it is important for researcher to reflect on the procedure employed to collect and analyse the data, especially in terms of the relationship between the researcher and the participant. In the following section, I discuss this topic prior to presenting the stories of my participants in Chapters 5, 6 and 7.

The Role of the Researcher: Some Interim Thoughts My own position in this research was sensitive, in that it was not possible (or even desirable) to take a neutral position. It was clear from the outset of the study that I was a participant in various facets of the research process. In the first place, my position at this university, as well as being the teacher in this language programme (although I had avoided interviewing students in my classes), undoubtedly accorded me certain privileges. My

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knowledge of the immediate research context enabled me to recruit, set up and manage the interviews with my participants with ease and sensitivity. For instance, I was aware of the best times to send out the flyers and the procedures that needed to be observed at this institution in order to recruit the number of participants deemed necessary for the research. Moreover, my background as an alumnus of this university facilitated a rapport with the participants at all stages of the research. In the recruitment process, I welcomed the incoming students as my kohai (juniors) in order to create a sense of affinity with them (see Figure 4.1). With regard to data collection, and recognising interviews as ‘a dynamic meaning-making process done in collaboratively with the interviewer’ (Gubrium & Holstein, 2002: 25), I participated in discursive interactions within the interviews, co-constructing them with the participants. The extract from Sayaka’s interview presented in Chapter 3 is one example. In the process of analysing the data, my experience as a returnee at this institute allowed me to bring to the surface, and offer explanations for, phenomena that could have otherwise been difficult. My discussions of Maki’s akogare (longing/desire) towards the returnees and her desire to become a part of the returnee’s community serve as a good example (see Chapter 5). Furthermore, my experiences as a teacher-researcher at this institution, as well as in other higher educational settings, have put me in an advantageous position, especially at the analysis stage. My familiarity with higher education in Japan contributed towards appreciating my participants’ stories from a different perspective. Thus, I think that my dual position enabled me to obtain deeper insights into the narratives of my participants, because I could operate in both worlds. In accordance with Mann’s ‘parameters of sensitivity’ in qualitative research (Mann, 2011), I endeavoured to maintain an awareness of any possible effect that my position might have had throughout the research process. Issues that emerged as the result of these reflections are discussed in more detail in the final chapter.

Chapter Summary In this chapter I have described the methodology used in this research by first explaining the theoretical-methodological foundations of the research design and the narrative-oriented approach used as the primary research strategy. I have also touched briefly on the ethical issues that were relevant to this research. In the following three chapters, I will present the stories of my six participants, whose language learning experiences illustrate how emotions play a major role in the formation of one’s language learning identity.

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Notes (1) There had traditionally been a dichotomist view of the ELP: on one hand it is seen purely as a language programme, with the content supporting the language, but on the other hand it is regarded as a programme that pursues liberal arts education while simultaneously improving language skills (Enochs, 2009). As a result, the ELP underwent a reform in April 2012. The new programme was named ‘English for Liberal Arts’. (2) Menard-Warwick’s (2011) narrative analysis on the life histories of English language teachers in Chile and California is an example of how a combination of these approaches can be employed to analyse teachers’ stories.

5 Sayaka’s and Maki’s Stories: Authenticate and Strengthen L2 Possible Selves

In this and the two chapters to follow, I present the most significant findings to emerge from the stories of my participants. These were furnished through interviews, weekly reflection reports and, for four participants, weekly email journals sent to the researcher during their six-week study-abroad programmes. I highlight what was unique and what was shared in their language learning experience, in order to identify the role of emotions in constructing one’s identity. The themes identified were helpful since they provided a structure in which to explore differences between the participants. In Chapter 3, the relationship between emotions and language learning was discussed but, to date, research on this subject appears to be limited (Kramsch, 2006; Pavlenko, 2005). Details as to how, and to what extent, emotions mediate learning and participation as well as any ramifications for identity formation are unclear. The narratives of my participants show how emotions can play a central role in the learners’ identity construction in the context of L2 users in an EFL environment. To guide my analysis, I draw (see Chapter 2) on the notions of the L2 possible self (Dörnyei, 2005, 2009) and ‘international posture’ (IP) (Yashima & Zenuk-Nishide, 2008), understandings that are well grounded in Lave and Wenger’s situated learning theory (Lave & Wenger, 1991) and the concept of imagined communities (Anderson, 1991; Kanno & Norton, 2003). Guided by the three core research questions that address the overarching question of this study (see Chapter 1), this chapter and the following two are divided into three main parts, beginning with a panoramic view of the participants’ language learning experience to date, followed by a trajectory of their relationship and orientation to English. I then present an account of learners’ view of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future. In each chapter, I discuss the stories of two participants who seem to represent similar themes, and show how their narratives contribute to answering the questions guiding this research. 80

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In this chapter, I present Sayaka and Maki’s narratives. Knowledge of participants’ past learning experience should be brought to the fore, since it is widely claimed that past experiences influence present and future learning (Dewey, 1933; Clandinin & Connelly, 2000). However, the temporal aspect must also be examined in light of the social context in which the learners are situated at that particular time in their life. As Markus and Nurius argue, the formation of the self emerges as individuals move in and out of the social domains in which they operate: ‘the pool of possible selves derives from the categories made salient by the individual’s particular sociocultural and historical context’ (Markus & Nurius, 1986: 954). The social domain of identity and self implies that L2 possible selves need to be examined beyond the self, to include the home, institutional settings, the situated activities in which learners engage, as well as the wider context of society. In addition, I would like to emphasise that we must not lose sight of the emotional dimension of an individual’s experiences, past, present and future. We cannot ignore the fact that past emotions and memories of those emotions follow an individual into the present and, in turn, contribute in shaping their future (Swain et al., 2011). The issue is how, and in what ways, emotions function in forming the self. The title of this chapter indicates that Sayaka and Maki seek to ‘authenticate and strengthen’ their L2 possible selves’. The main thread that emerges in their stories is the way they promote their ideal self-image as L2 users in the imagined international community of English speakers. Learners need not only to create their L2 possible self, but also to maintain and sustain a clear image of their future-oriented self-knowledge (possible self). By strengthening the future visions of themselves, their ideal selves become sharper and, as visions of their hoped-for self become clearer, their investment in the learning of the target language learning increases (Lamb, 2009). What is particularly relevant to this study is how the stories of the two learners suggest that the emotional component is a prominent feature in reinforcing their Ideal L2 selves, and hence their learning of the target language. As MacIntyre et al. argue: The emotions experienced are critical to understanding the motivational properties of possible selves…. Emotions are fundamentally important motivators. Without a strong tie to the learner’s emotional system, possible selves exists as cold cognition. (MacIntyre et al., 2009: 47)

Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences Sayaka’s stories From very early childhood, Sakaya recalls that English surrounded her. She vividly remembers how her mother played songs from a collection of

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Walt Disney music CDs at home. Although at that time she had no idea (was not aware) that she was listening to an ‘English’ song, she liked (suki) the cheerful, rhythmic beat of the songs and immensely enjoyed (tanoshi) listening to the songs that her mother had chosen for her. Excerpt 5.1: Sayaka I remember very clearly listening to Disney songs at home. I didn’t know that they were ‘English’ but I liked (suki) the sounds. I really enjoyed (tanoshi) it. It wasn’t ‘language’ to me then, of course. They were enjoyable songs, and part of ‘play’ (asobi) for me. Sakaya comes from a well-to-do middle-class family. Her father is a teacher at a local high school. Her mother was a English teacher at a public junior high school until she gave birth to Sayaka. Sayaka is the only child in the family and has been educated at a prestigious private school in Yokohama, a pleasant suburb near Tokyo. This private Catholic school (primary to upper secondary) for girls is well known in Japan for its high standard in language education, particularly in English. It is regarded as one of the most competitive schools in Japan, and attracts many middle- and upper-class families in the region. Sayaka began to realise that English was another language (Sayaka’s transcript notes ‘something that was different from the language they used at home’) when she started to accompany her mother to her weekly English conversation classes, held at a privately owned local language school. Sayaka recalls with pleasure how they would sing English songs aloud as they walked to her mother’s English classes ‘bravely ignoring all the stares they would get from passers-by’. At her mother’s language school, Sayaka gradually picked up formulaic expressions and greetings, such as ‘How are you?’ and ‘What’s your name?’ It was merely a matter of time before Sayaka would develop an interest in learning English as she also started taking English conversation classes at this language school with her mother. She continued to attend these until she was in high school. She emphasised that she was ‘used to’ (nareteiru) interacting with foreigners and ‘using English’, well before her formal English education started at junior high school. In addition to these English conversation lessons at this privately owned language school, Sayaka began studying English at her elementary school. The school had its own English language programme, which began in fifth grade. The main aim of the English classes at the primary level was to ‘expose’ students to English and to promote international awareness. This was in keeping with the goal of the Japanese Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology (MEXT), initiated in 1998, as part of the period of Integrated Studies (Yutori Kyoiku) (see note 1 in Chapter 1). The objective of the English programme was ‘to expose children to a foreign language, and familiarize them with ways of life and cultures of a foreign

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country as they experience these activities appropriate to the primary school level’ (Honna & Takeshita, 2005). The weekly English conversation classes at Sayaka’s school were taught by a Japanese English teacher. Sayaka found these classes enjoyable. Excerpt 5.2: Sayaka We had classes once a week. It was fun. There were no exams. We video­ taped ourselves giving self-introductions, for instance. I guess it was a sort of an introductory course to English – to prepare us for junior high. I had a head start in English at my language school, so I was very confident in these classes. My classmates looked up at me. For Sayaka these classes were a kind of ‘asobi’ (play) and, in retrospect, she considered them to be an introduction to her formal English education, which would start full-time from seventh grade. Indeed, English at the elementary level was not considered a school subject. This suggests the absence of any formal curriculum or textbook and any form of assessment or evaluation (Honna & Takeshita, 2005). As these were game-like activities without any formal evaluation or assessment, Sayaka regarded English as a form of ‘asobi’ (play). Since Sayaka’s school had a strong English language programme, at middle school, English classes were scheduled five times a week (compared with three times a week at most public schools). These consisted of four classes led by a Japanese English teacher, and weekly ‘speaking and listening classes’ that were managed by native English-speaking teachers. Sayaka did not experience any difficulties with her English classes during her three years at lower secondary school. Her grades were excellent and she enjoyed her English classes. Outside of school, she continued taking English conversation lessons at the local language school. Although she had ample opportunities to interact with native English speakers, she was nevertheless ‘happy’ (see Extract 5.3) when she was able to give directions to foreign tourists visiting her city. She stated that this was different from using English with her native English-speaking teachers at her language school. Extract 5.3 shows the huge sense of accomplishment and satisfaction she felt: Excerpt 5.3: Sayaka I was so happy (ureshi). Felt a great deal of satisfaction (jyujitsu) that I was able to use my English to give foreigners directions to the station. One of them even complimented my English – this gave me an extra boost to continue learning English. Yatta! (I did it!) The use of words and expressions such as ureshi (happy), jyujitsu (satisfaction) and yatta (I did it!) are indicative of Sayaka’s attempt to form a vision

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of herself as a successful language learner. By using English in a meaningful way, she identified herself as an L2 user. In addition, a 10-day home-stay programme to Singapore sponsored by her school was one of the highlights of Sayaka’s memories of using English during her three years at junior high school. Although it was a short visit, her experiences were extremely rewarding and they contributed to her developing sense of herself as an English-user: Excerpt 5.4: Sayaka My visit to Singapore was really something new to me. I loved every minute of it (honntouni tanoshikatta). I don’t think my English improved as a result of it – only 10 days [pause], but it was both a cultural ex­ perience as well as a language one. I still continue to communicate with this family via emails. However, Sayaka’s passion for learning and using English was over­ shadowed by her experience at high school. At upper secondary school, the number of class hours for English increased by two, from five to seven. The main feature of the curriculum was the clear division between the teacherfronted English classes led mostly by Japanese English teachers and the more hands-on oral communication classes taught by English-speaking nationals. The former were geared towards preparing the students for college entrance exams, while the primary goal of the latter was to foster communication skills. Thus, linguistic content such as grammar and vocabulary played a subordinate role. Excerpts 5.5 and 5.6 illustrate this point: Excerpt 5.5: Sayaka At high school, we had up to seven hours of English classes. Grammar was the most difficult part for me. Also, I felt that I lacked sufficient vocabulary. We had oral communication classes, but that was just play (‘asobi’). The main goal of learning English at high school was to prepare us for the college entrance exams, I think. Excerpt 5.6: Sayaka I hated English when I had to solve comprehension questions. When I realised that English was something that I had to study to pass the entrance exams or get good grades, suddenly English was not attractive to me at all. Studying English for exams was obviously ‘not attractive’ for Sayaka. A change in pedagogy is often cited as the cause for disinvestments (Carpenter el al., 2008) and in this case it was a shift towards instructional practices that focused on exam preparations. However, it would be more helpful to explain Sayaka’s negative affective state in terms of the lack of vision of herself as an

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English-user in her imagined community of English-users. In such a situation, she found little incentive for investment. Although the oral communication classes were more inviting to Sayaka, she did acknowledge the significance of the structured approach to teaching English, in particular with respect to their efficiency in preparing students for college entrance exams. Excerpt 5.7: Sayaka [Referring to the oral communication courses.] For one, we didn’t have any exams. Another thing was that these classes had a lot of time for speaking activities. For example, asking questions and answering questions on a certain topic. Or we would learn a conversational pattern and act it out together by taking turns playing a certain role. And the teacher would speak to us in English, so I felt that we were using English. I wasn’t just sitting there, listening to explanations about English. But these rather boring classes were taken more seriously by everyone. I had to take these boring classes because we need to study what’s covered in these classes for college entrance exams. As explained in Chapter 1, the oral communications classes that Sayaka described are a part of the course of study implemented by the government as early as 1989 in the high school curriculum. The aim was promote the develop­ ment of functional English abilities in spoken skills (Taguchi & Naganuma, 2006). However, these ‘two types of English instruction, ­grammar-teaching vs communicative language teaching, posed a dilemma’ (Sakui, 2004: 158), not only to teachers but also, as evident in Sayaka’s comments, to students as well. It created an impression of two kinds of English, namely the well known dichotomy between English-for-­communication and English-forexams (Gorsuch, 2000; LoCastro, 1996; Sakui, 2004; Taguchi & Naganuma, 2006). As one of the Japanese English teachers in Sakui’s study lamented, ‘Oral communication is for fun, and the other is for studying for the test’ (Sakui, 2004: 158). Sayaka was discouraged by the traditional style of language learning pedagogy, with its focus on accuracy, which included rote memorisation of vocabulary and pattern practices, and where the outcome of learning (an exam result) was the main learning focus. This was clear from her use of emotive expressions such as ‘difficult’, ‘boring’ and ‘lacked sufficient vocabulary’ (Excerpts 5.5, 5.7). In other words, similar to many Japanese high school students studying English, Sayaka was caught between English as a ‘knowledge-based school subject’ and English as a ‘communicative tool’, where communication becomes an important objective in learning English (Murray, 2009; Sakui, 2004). In the former, there was only the strong sense of obligation to learn English. Sayaka’s sense of frustration could be attributed to a conflict between the dual nature of English education in Japan, since it was with the latter that Sayaka identified and she valued it greatly.

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As we have observed, Sayaka’s English language learning experience began at infancy. Her parents were closely involved in her educational progress and they provided her with the necessary learning resources. Sayaka had regular exposure to the spoken language through a variety of media, including listening to English songs, watching American television dramas and listening to her mother read stories from picture books in English. Attending a private school, she had the privilege of receiving English education from the primary level. Although English increasingly became a school subject to her (rather than for functional or communicative purposes), as she moved up from junior high to high school she was nevertheless ‘surrounded’ by English, both at school and at home, more than most Japanese students. For Sayaka, English was not ‘something’ special (tokubetsu dewa nai), but a part of her everyday life (nichijyouteki).

Maki’s stories Maki’s language learning experience was similar to Sayaka’s, as she also regarded English as part of her everyday life. Her father’s business took the family to Bangladesh when Maki was two years old. She received her pre-school education at an international school where the medium of instruction was English. The family returned to Japan when she was only four years old, and thus her memories of her English-using self were quite vague, but her impression of her time at the pre-school in Bangladesh was that it was ‘fun and full of excitement’. Maki’s family, especially her mother, were enthusiastic advocates of English education early in life. Her mother, a professor at a nursing college and a well respected professional in her field, spent much of her time on research in developing countries. Maki acknowledged that her mother’s professional career reinforced the significance of English. Her mother had a good command of English and Maki wanted to emulate her as a model English speaker. When Maki was a third-grader at primary school, aged 10, she started to take English conversation lessons at a nearby YMCA facility. At home, largely due to her mother’s influence, Maki watched various American television dramas. Her favourite was Full House.1 Excerpt 5.8: Maki Whenever she had time, we would watch TV dramas like Full House or Friends. They were easy to listen to and you could usually figure out the story. The best part is that you don’t necessarily have to fully understand the language. I remember my mother encouraging me to watch them without the subtitles. I think it helped me improve my listening skills. I enjoyed them. I thought English was fun and hoped that, someday, I would be able to communicate in English freely. It would be sort of ‘cool’ to be able to speak English like that in Japan!

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When Maki moved on to junior high school, she started attending English conversation classes at the Shane School of English, a well known private language school managed by British teachers. As with most such language schools, the pedagogical practices employed were broadly ‘communicative’. They included various game-like activities that contained elements of ‘language entertainment’ (in the sense that it modelled specific language structures and vocabulary that are entertaining to children) (Moody, 2006). Not only did Maki found these English classes energetic (gennki), fun and motivating, but she also appreciated the opportunities to interact with native English speakers. Excerpt 5.9: Maki English lessons were fun and interesting at these schools. Of course, at that time, the lessons were mainly singing songs and playing games, but I felt that I was using English. English was real because I could talk to the native English speakers. In contrast, English education at lower secondary school was very boring for Maki. The school followed the traditional pedagogical approach, using Japanese as the medium of instruction, with a focus on English as a test subject. Maki detested (daikirai is the word that she used) her Japanese English teacher’s Japanese accent, and it discouraged her from taking her English classes seriously. As a result, Maki did not actively take part in her English classes, even though she was capable of doing so. From a L2 possible self perspective, this can be explained by the discrepancy between her current sense of self and her vision of her future self as an L2 user (Dörnyei, 2005, 2009). Given such context, Maki had little reason to invest in an undesirable imagined community (Norton, 2001). Although English at school was merely another school subject, once outside the school premises Maki had abundant opportunities to use colloquial English with native speakers of English. For example, she enjoyed her conversations with people who came to visit her parents and, as the family travelled extensively to developing countries, Maki was provided with ample opportunities to converse in English. Like Sayaka, Maki had no reservations about using English. A significant shift in her views of English came about when Maki entered high school (one affiliated the research site), located in the suburbs of Tokyo, adjacent to the university. This school is well known in Japan for its contributions to returnee (kikokusei) education (see Chapter 1 for a definition of kikokushijo). For students whose parents live abroad, the school has dormitory facilities. Since Maki’s mother had to live in Senegal for her research (by this time, her parents were divorced) Maki decided to live in the dorms. Maki had very fond memories of her life at this school, as she succinctly describes in Excerpt 5.10.

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Excerpt 5.10: Maki I just loved my school life there. There were many outspoken people, especially the returnees. I really enjoyed talking to them in English. I was delighted when they complimented me on my pronunciation…. Some people told me that I would probably start hating English surrounded by fluent English speakers, but it was the opposite. I became more interested and enthusiastic about learning English. Maki had a strong desire to gain fluency in English. In high school she met many returnees. During the first interview, she strongly emphasised her desire (akogare) to become like them. Excerpt 5.11: Maki I have a strong akogare for English, and the returnees. I see them talk in English like native speakers on the trains and in town. I tried to mimic their pronunciations. They are ‘cool’. It is important to provide a brief account of how returnees (kikokushijo) are portrayed in Japan at this point, as Maki makes repeated reference to them in her interviews. Educated abroad during their formative years, many returnees find it difficult to readjust to Japanese cultural norms, and encounter problems related to different cultural values and expectations (see e.g. Block, 2006a; Kanno, 2003; Macdonald & Kowatari, 1995; Yashiro, 1995). Furthermore, returnees traditionally occupied an ambivalent position in Japanese society (Kanno, 2000, 2003). On the one hand, they are regarded as ‘misfits’ in Japanese society; on the other, they are deemed a valuable societal resource because of their proficiency in a foreign language (mainly English). For the last two decades, however, the public has characterised returnees more positively and, as a result, there is a strong ‘akogare’ (desire) towards these children and their presumed international expertise. Maki was no exception to this trend. The returnees symbolised a perfect model of an English-speaking self as they expressed their opinions freely in both Japanese and English. Maki was taken aback at how active the dis­cussions were conducted at her high school. Contrary to her behaviour at junior high school, where she usually kept a low profile in her English classes, Maki tried to take part in the discussions because at a high school with an international atmosphere she felt she had to make her presence known. One of the strategies she used was to ‘mimic’ them: Excerpt 5.12: Maki I tried to act like them. For instance, using words like ‘you know’, ‘yeah…’ during group discussions. Whenever I could, I would try to take part in the discussions. I wasn’t afraid of making mistakes. After all, they all know that I am Shigatu sei (an April student).2

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Furthermore, dorm life with the returnees undoubtedly had a strong impact on her English learning. ‘Mimicking’ (mane wo suru) is a term that Maki used quite often. She tried to follow their fashion and joined the dance club to which many of the returnees belonged. In order to align herself with musical tastes, Maki remembers how she started to listen to Western rock and pop, whereas previously she would have listened to Japanese pop music. Maki would frequently find herself looking up the meaning of lyrics, to keep up with their conversations. Excerpt 5.13: Maki I joined the dance club where I could meet up with the returnees. I downloaded many songs from the internet and checked the lyrics so that I could follow what they were talking about. And it was helpful in increasing my vocabulary! Plus good for improving my listening skills, I think…. I wanted to become like them – the kikokusei. I even asked my parents why our family never lived abroad! It would appear that, on the surface, the ‘returnees’ acknowledged Maki and her efforts to emulate them. Maki herself doubted how far they accepted her as ‘one of them’ (nakama), since she was not a bona fide returnee. They had little in common other than the fact that they lived in the same dormitory. Perhaps the returnees acknowledged Maki’s presence because she could prove herself useful to them by helping them out with their maths homework. It should be noted here that returnees are generally considered to be weaker at maths than their Japanese counterparts (Kanno, 2003; Yashiro, 1995): Excerpt 5.14: Maki I used to help them out with their maths. That was one of the subjects that they usually had problems with. Maki felt especially close to returnees who were ‘more Japanese-minded’. The term ‘returnees’ is often used very loosely and broadly in the literature, but one can identify various ‘types’ of returnees, as clearly demonstrated in Kanno’s work (2003) on returnees and their identities. Some may be fully acculturated or assimilated in the target culture, so that the ways in which they act, behave, dress and think and their preferences are more akin to those of the target culture. On the other hand, there are returnees who have never quite been able to integrate fully into the communities of their target language. Perhaps the group of ‘more Japanese-minded’ returnees was more sympathetic to Maki because they could identify with her struggle to learn English. Based on my personal observations and experience as a returnee, the fact that Maki regarded them as ‘models’ must have encouraged them to recognise and validate themselves as returnees.

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Maki, like Sayaka, was exposed to English from an early age, due largely to her parents’ interest in language education. Maki had a strong desire to become a fluent English speaker who could function in the target culture. Following in her mother’s footsteps, she had a clear vision of (and desire for) her future self to become a professional actively involved in the field of international development. A clear vision of an English-using self in her imagined international community was strengthened by two models: her mother and the returnees.

Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present This section focuses on the participants’ conceptualisation of the English language itself and their views on language learning. Previous studies suggest that those who are able to relate to the wider world, that is, learners who have a greater interest in global affairs and activities, are more likely to be able to envisage their English-using self (Yashima et al., 2004; Yashima & Zenuk-Nishide, 2008). The more learners are conscious of relating to the world, the more they are able to visualise their L2 self. Founded on this understanding, I aim first to demonstrate how, and to what extent, the two participants’ views of English and their learning experience influenced the creation of, and strengthening of, their English-using identities, and, second, I wish to illustrate how emotions factor into this process.

Sayaka’s stories As portrayed earlier, Sayaka’s relationship with English was something that came naturally to her. Largely because of her mother’s influence, she was ‘exposed’ to English from a very early age. For instance, at home, Sayaka and her mother would watch movies in English without the subtitles or she would ‘read’3 English newspapers that her mother subscribed to: ‘English newspapers would be lying around in the house, and I just couldn’t help noticing it’ (from Sayaka’s transcript). Furthermore, from time to time, Sayaka’s family had a lodger from a high school in the United States stay for a year, which meant that she was able to communicate in English at home as well. In other words, she had a house containing abundant English-language ‘resources’ (Bourdieu, 1991). As noted previously, Sayaka conceptualised English as a medium to communicate with foreigners. As she clearly stated in her initial interview, ‘I did not feel that I was learning English. I was just delighted that I was able to ask questions, and say what I wanted to say to foreigners’. However, as we observed, her relationship with English started to change as English to her became predominantly a school subject. At high school, she clearly felt that she was distancing herself from English as she increasingly realised the complexities involved in learning a language. For

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instance, she became acutely aware that she lacked the grammatical and lexical knowledge necessary to read long stretches of written discourse, which resulted in her experiencing difficulties (muzukashi). As discussed, by the time Sayaka was in high school, a large amount of time in her English classes was spent on grammatical structures in order to prepare the students for college entrance exams. As she went through this ‘ordeal’ (shiren), a sense of ‘dislike’ towards English stirred inside her. Her own perception of herself as deficient in vocabulary and knowledge started to pull her away from English. ‘Eigo ga iyaninatta’ (I began to dislike English). As a result, Sayaka spent less time on English and more time on other subjects she was interested in, such as history, which in turn resulted in lower English grades. In her words, ‘It was a vicious cycle’ (akujunnkan). It is also interesting to note that throughout the interviews, Sayaka repeatedly emphasised that she did not dislike English itself, but she felt wary of it as a school subject. Excerpt 5.13: Sayaka I didn’t like (sukidewanai) English as a subject, but I don’t think I ever disliked ‘English’ itself. During high school, I went on a 10-day studyabroad programme to Singapore, and since we had a lodger from a high school in the United States, I was able to communicate in English at home as well. This statement can be understood initially in terms of her emotional disposition towards the language itself and towards learning English. However, it can also be regarded as stemming from frustration due to the discrepancy between the perception of herself as an English-language user (up until high school she was learning English in an environment where she had many opportunities for interaction with native English speakers and, thus, con­sidered herself an L2 user) and her current self (where English was understood to be an object of academic study rather than as means of communication). In her second interview, conducted approximately two months after entering college, I observed how Sayaka expressed her ambivalent and complex attitudes towards English and learning English. At this stage of her language learning experience, Sayaka experienced two kinds of English. One was the so-called ‘everyday English’ or ‘general English’ and the other was ‘English used in academic settings’. With regard to the former, the campus offered her many opportunities to interact in English with returnees and overseas students of various nationalities. Sayaka enjoyed these conversations, which reaffirmed that she was an English-user in this community. Excerpt 5.14: Sayaka With foreign students coming from various countries, on campus I could talk to them in English. I really felt that here I am, using English! It was a great sense of accomplishment.

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Although Sayaka pointed out that she was getting used to (naretekita) using English all day, on the other hand she felt frustrated with herself for not being able to function in classes where academic English was the focus. Excerpt 5.15: Sayaka Here I not only had to say things, but say things in a coherent, logical manner. In my writing course, I was told that ‘writing about something’ was not good enough. I had not only had to specify the topic, but I needed to narrow it down. Be more focused. In Japanese, I would be able to sort of say things off the top of my head (gomakasu). She came to realise that what mattered was the content: that is, how well one could articulate one’s thoughts in English on academic issues. Sayaka felt that she was not able to express her ideas fully in an academic manner. This frustrated her immensely: Excerpt 5.16: Sayaka Speaking in English is not a problem for me, but discussing academic issues in English is another matter. I need to prepare for it, whereas in Japanese I would be able to do so without thinking twice about it. I want to turn my attitude towards English in a more positive direction. When I hear the returnees express their thoughts without any hesitation, I envy them. Feel like I want to become one of them. But how do I become like them? Don’t know what do to. It’s frustrating. How can I turn the ‘negative spiral’ around? Sayaka clearly stated that her relationship with English has changed tremendously over the past few months in college. At the primary and secondary school levels, using English with foreigners was simply fun, but now, at college, content was important: ‘you cannot simply be satisfied with using English’. Sayaka explained her actions during group discussions: Excerpt 5.17: Sayaka When there is someone really fluent in my group I am not able to express myself. I feel intimidated in front of them. I lose confidence in myself. This was the first time I had felt this way about myself. It was like showing a part of me that I never thought existed. Sayaka clearly expresses her anxiety towards using English in this context. As Pellegrino Aveni (2005) would contend, this was not due solely to the anxiety she had about her linguistic competence, but also the perception of her diminished self. The preceding comments illustrate how Sayaka constructed versions of her L2 self that were based on her changing sense of

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English competence. She formed different kinds of identities based on the difficulties she was experiencing at a given period of her learning experience. As Martin-Berltran (2010) argues, competence and proficiency are situated activities. For instance, as we observed during high school, Sayaka found the exam-oriented approach to grammar difficult to cope with, which resulted in her portraying herself as a ‘deficient’ language learner. It is interesting to note that it was around this time that she formed a nigate ishiki (a sense of inability) towards English, and for the first time felt that she did not like studying English. Furthermore, at college, she was not able to make significant contributions in group discussions because she lacked confidence in her L2 self, and this produced feelings of anxiety. As Pellegrino Aveni argues, referring to the correlation between anxiety and threats to one’s self, ‘it is not anxiety which invokes the threat, as others have maintained, but rather the threat to self-perception (identity) which produces feelings of anxiety’ (Pellegrino Aveni, 2005: 25; original emphasis). It is interesting to note that Sayaka’s negative affective state could have reduced her sense of self-efficacy (which could undermine her ideal self). In Excerpt 5.18, Sayaka points out how the skill of ‘speaking’ or fluency is equated with language competence. In fact, Matsuura et al. (2004), in a study of Japanese English learners, show that oral competence is the definitive factor to ‘measure’ linguistic proficiency. Sayaka’s emphasis on oral proficiency appears to demonstrate this finding as she realises how important it is to just ‘keep on talking’. Extract 5.18: Sayaka’s journal entry, May 2008 Just keep on talking. That’s the trick to these group discussions. That’s the way I feel. Fluency (ryuchou) matters more than accuracy (seikakusa). We just need to keep on speaking up in class. So, I will try to keep doing that…. This is an example of how Sayaka’s Ideal L2 self could have compelled her to monitor her own learning and helped her to find alternative means when other measures failed. As Boyatzis and Akrivou maintain: ‘The ideal self, once activated, promotes the development of a person’s learning agenda and then a more articulated learning plan, experimentation and practice with new behaviors, feelings and perceptions’ (Boyatzis & Akrivou, 2006: 28).

Maki’s stories Maki had a strong desire to attain native-like fluency and to become a fully competent L2 user. As illustrated in earlier in the chapter, Maki’s linguistic habitus was formed largely by her background, and the cultural and economic capital that was bestowed on her. Her overseas experience of living abroad and her exposure to English through a number of resources

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in the home (due mainly to her mother’s influence) undoubtedly contributed to her interest in English. For example, the opportunities to interact with foreigners visiting her house encouraged her to establish a vision of her English-using self. English was a medium for self-expression, and not an accumulation of knowledge. Hence, it was not particularly surprising to find that the only time she evaluated English in negative terms was during her junior high school years. Recall that English at the lower secondary school was taught as a school subject based mainly on a grammatico-­lexical syllabus, the conventional pedagogical approach characteristic of state schools. One can explain Maki’s ambivalent attitude towards her language learning here in terms of the mismatch between her conceptualisation of English as a means of communication and the ‘hidden’ school discourse of English as an object of academic study (I say ‘hidden’ because the goal of the ‘official’ discourse emphasised a practical knowledge of English, as outlined in Chapter 1). However, it is more helpful to explain Maki’s frustration during this period in terms of the possible L2 selves concept. Maki envisioned herself as a competent English-user in an imagined community of L2 users. The traditional instructional approach at her school provided her with few opportunities for oral practice, which Maki thought would diminish her realisation of her Ideal L2 self. As a result, we see her withdrawing from classroom activities. This was no more evident than in her attitude of nonparticipation, as she expressed it in Extract 5.19. Excerpt 5.19: Maki Just keep on talking. That’s the trick to these group discussions. That’s the way I feel. Fluency (ryuchou) matters more than accuracy (seikakusa). We just need to keep on speaking up in class. So, I will try to keep doing that….: ‘I tried to keep a low profile in my English classes at junior high school. I didn’t enjoy my classes. Everything was so ‘rigid’. Just pattern practice. It was dull’. Maki’s future L2 self rested partly on her agogare (desire) towards the returnees, who symbolised ‘coolness’ and ‘smartness’ (kakkoii). Maki’s vision of her English-using self was not the native speaker norm, but the bilingual returnees. Perhaps she found it more realistic to relate her future self to the returnees than native speakers. This is understandable if we draw on what Murphey (2002) calls Near Peer Modelling – described as when a student feels a desire to become like a peer who is ‘near’ in age but already closer to the target language speakers in many ways (ethnicity, interests, gender, frequency of contacts, etc.) (Murphey & Arao, 2001). Sometimes, Japanese English teachers who are proficient in English, or peers who have a good command of English, can also be one’s ‘near peer’ examples. In Maki’s case, the returnees represented not only the past but also what might happen in the future.

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Excerpt 5.20: Maki My section-mates tell me that I talk, act and dress like a returnee. I am more active than my section-mates. I often end up taking initiative in everything. I am the one to arrange the get-togethers for the section; I usually take the lead in group discussions. So, perhaps I do look and act like a returnee. I like outgoing, energetic people. So, before I know it, I tend to hang around people who are like that, and it so happens that the returnees are more like that – I mean, compared with shigatsusei (students who have studied under the Japanese school system) who tend to be more majime (serious) and otonashi (quiet, passive). I think I am in between actually: not a kikokusei, but also not seen as a genuine shigatsusei. Maki explains that it is easier for her to relate to the returnees than the shigatsuei by alluding to her outgoing personality. As illustrated in Excerpt 5.20, in general the returnees are considered to be more opinionated and outspoken than their counterparts who have been educated under the Japanese school system (Block, 2006a; Goodman, 1990; Kanno, 2000). However, Maki’s outgoing character can also be understood in terms of her imagined communities of L2 user, her Ideal L2 self and the concept of Near Peer Modelling. It is in the community of returnees that Maki was able to realise her Ideal L2 self. In this community she had regular opportunities to interact with the returnees, who were her role models. The knowledge and practices circulating among group members mirrored the wider community of global English-users to which Maki aspired to belong. Her actions and behaviours in the community of returnees affirmed her membership in the broader world of English-users. What is significant is how Maki was ‘accepted’ by the community of returnees, although she may not have been recognised as a fully legitimate peripheral participant of the returnee community (since she was, after all, not a returnee). Equally important to our understanding is that she was positioned favourably within this community of returnees. Acceptance and positive affirmation assured Maki a position in this community, which, in turn, contributed to her active participation. Moreover, Maki’s successful identity as an Englishuser was recognised not only within the confines of the university, but also so outside of it: Excerpt 5.21: Maki (M=Maki, R=researcher) R: How do you feel about people looking at you as a returnee? M: It’s not bad. I rather like it, I guess. I work part time at an izakaya (a Japanese-style bar). Whenever a foreigner (gaijin) comes in, I am always ask to wait on them. This is because the people who work there know that I from this university, and that I can speak English quite fluently.

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They appreciate me, and also I am happy when the foreigners tell me how helpful I am. Some of them even compliment me on my English. These are reassuring moments. Although, in general, all of the focal participants in this study share an affinity towards English and its associated values, Maki, by far, demonstrated the strongest positive sense of relationship with the language, which was coupled with a clear vision of her future L2 self. In her third interview, she stated that ‘if you took English away from me, there would be nothing left’. She strongly identified with the language and positioned herself as a legitimate language learner in the community of learners. Her position was validated by how others saw her. An earlier ‘izakaya’ episode was one such example: Excerpt 5.22: Maki I am surrounded by English more than ever. So, although I am not aware of it, words in English tend to pop out of my mouth. It’s the Ru Oshiba phenomenon!4 This is okay when I am around with my friends and teachers here, but, with friends, like, from junior high, it tends to get awkward sometimes. But I have found out recently that my classmates from junior high sort of accept that. They say, ‘Oh, yeah. Maki. You are like a native speaker.’ Cool. It’s nice to be seen like that. Sometimes you can get bullied, but in my case, they sort of accepted that as my norm. Maki’s vision of her L2 possible self was driven by the akogare (desire) to become a bilingual cosmopolitan like the returnees, rather than simply a Japanese person who speaks English, or monolingual Japanese. This was further exemplified in her engagement with the community of returnees, who reinforced the possibility of realising her future self-knowledge. Dörnyei (2009) argues that people differ in the ways they generate or sustain a successful possible self. During their formative years, adolescents produce a multitude of possible selves, but such selves can arise from several different origins. Near Peer Modelling is one such example, where a possible self stems from the student’s peer groups. Near peer models are powerful in that learners perceive then as ‘realistic’ targets within their particular circumstances. Possible selves are only effective insomuch as learners regard them as feasible goals to attain. As Pizzolato puts it: ‘The relation between what students want to become and what students actually become may be motivated by what students feel they are able to become’ (Pizzolato, 2006: 59). Maki’s akogare was the major driving force that helped her to strengthen her immediate future self.

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Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future How learners envision themselves as L2 users affects their present and future learning. As Norton and Kanno argue, learners investment in the target language ‘can be best understood in the context of future affiliations’ (Kanno & Norton, 2003: 244). Visions of their future successful selves are a powerful driving force. In addition, the past and present emotional state of the learners also contributes to creating and strengthening visions of their L2 self.

Sayaka’s stories As noted, Sayaka’s view of her English-using self changed during upper secondary school. Outside of school, English was a medium for communication, but in school, especially in upper secondary school, English was merely another dreary school subject, devoid of its functional purposes for communication. In the former situation, she had a positive view about English and learning English, and was confident about her own English-using self. In the latter, she appears to have developed an ambivalent disposition towards learning and using English. A discrepancy arose between her future Englishusing self and a sense of obligation to study English as a school subject. This gap sometimes diminished her desire to use the language, and subsequently her participation and investment in her learning. Sayaka’s view of herself as an English-user changed dramatically when she went to Toronto, Canada, for a six-week study-abroad programme during the first summer at college. Although this was not her first time overseas (she had previously participated in a study-abroad programme), in the interview upon her return she evaluated her summer experience as ‘awesome!’ (sugoi). In summing up her overall impressions of her summer in Canada, she observed that ‘Things weren’t always that pink and rosy’, but she felt that she had gained more than just linguistic competence; the trip helped her broaden her perspective of the world. She regarded her experience as ‘irreplaceable’ and, in particular, her interactions with a group of students from Columbia left a great impression on her. Excerpt 5.23 (S=Sayaka, R=researcher) S: These people were very outspoken. They spoke about just anything that came to their minds. They made a huge impression by their existence in class. The Japanese, including myself, were never good at this. We couldn’t just jump into the discussions…. I couldn’t say what I thought if it was not directly related to the flow of the discussions. Since we weren’t able to speak up in class, I felt that we were ignored by them. To them, we didn’t exist! I felt an urgency to let them know I existed.

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R: Why were you not able to speak out? An obvious reason is your limited English, but any others? What do you think? S: Yes, language was one. I didn’t want to make a mistake, and be embarrassed in front of them. I was afraid that they would see me an ‘invalid’ or something. R: Did you do something about it? S: I talked to them outside of class. I knew that if the topic was different I could express myself. So, we talked about Japan. You know, Japanese customs, food, etc. I wanted to be acknowledged and accepted by them. I didn’t want them to think I was an invalid with nothing to say. We got along very well. I thought this made a difference in class. They started to ask me questions in group discussions. I was happy. Even after returning to Japan, I communicate with them through Facebook or email. Sayaka felt confident in talking in English about a topic that she was more or less familiar with, in this case Japanese culture. We see how she negotiated membership and participation, and constructed her identity through her own cultural capital (Norton, 2001). Sayaka made use of her identity as ‘Japanese’ by making reference to Japanese culture to gain access to this community. This strategy appears to have worked out well for Sayaka, as exemplified in Extract 5.23, as she was subsequently able to reposition herself more favourably in the classroom (Morita, 2004; Norton, 2001). Another experience that Sayaka highlighted in her story was her relationship with her teacher on one of the courses. The six-week summer programme was a mixture of required courses that were scheduled in the mornings, with several electives that were held in the afternoons. The elective courses were more content-based or project-oriented than the morning sessions. In one of the morning courses, Sayaka was having difficulty keeping up with the class. For a couple of weeks she could not speak up in class although she wanted to participate in the discussions. Fearing that she would be portrayed as an incompetent student by her teacher, Sayaka sought to resolve this situation by contacting the teacher via email to explain her plight. Excerpt 5.24: Sayaka After the first two weeks, I decided to email her. Needed to be brave here. I told her about my situation. Also, since I was interested in her area of expertise, cultural studies, I also asked questions about that, too. I don’t know whether it was because of that but I felt that the teacher would ask me questions in class, or slow down the discussions so that it would be easier for the students like me to participate. After I sent her the email, I felt comfortable talking in class, and, I think, I was able to take more part in the discussions.

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Excerpts 5.23 and 5.24 illustrate how Sayaka was negotiating not only her competence but her identity as well. She was determined to improve, in particular, her aural communication skills. To this end, she employed a variety of strategies. First, she negotiated with her Columbian peers and, second, she acted out her learner agency with her teacher for more opportunities to participate in class. From a traditional psycholinguistic standpoint, the latter could be seen as a linguistic problem associated with psychological issues such as nervousness, anxiety or lack of confidence. The ‘community of practice’ approach would explain it in terms of negotiating competence and membership of the community. However, the L2 possible self perspective would focus on how past investment and a vision for the future impelled Sayaka to take action. I would like to emphasise how emotions are involved in the process. Once again, we observe how the discomfort that Sayaka experienced arising from the gap between her current sense of self and her ideal self pushed her to take actions to rectify the situation. Sayaka’s case demonstrates how emotions can be powerful motivators of possible selves and can mediate learning and participation in various ways. Sayaka mentioned another interesting episode with this teacher. To­wards the end of the first part of the course, Sayaka decided to take the initiative to negotiate her workload. She felt that she and her classmates were overburdened with homework. Sometimes she would have to miss lunch (thus preventing her from socialising with peers from other courses), or have to stay up late to complete the assignments for the follow­ing day. Excerpt 5.25 (S= Sayaka, R=researcher) S: I thought it was ridiculous! This was supposed to be our summer break as well! I knew we had to study, but not this much. Besides, spending so much time on this course would mean that I could not balance out my time with other courses I was taking. That could mean lowering my grades for other courses! R: Did you do something about it? S: Yes. My Japanese classmate and I took it up with the administrative office. As a result, the teacher started to give us less homework, but she also told us that we should have contacted her first before going to the administrative office. R: Did you sense any hard feelings between you and this teacher after that? S: Not really. She was very professional about it. In fact, my friend and I were the only two students who chose to take her course in the latter half of the programme. I got to know her, and, besides, I was interested in her area, cultural studies. That’s what I want to study. Sayaka’s ‘act of resistance’ came somewhat as a surprise to me, given that she came from a traditional Japanese school culture, where respect for the

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teacher is highly valued (Hiraga, 2008; Rohlen & LeTrendre, 1998). So what led her to behave in this manner? It is understood in applied linguistics that negative emotions lead to no learning (Swain et al., 2011). But Sayaka’s story informs us that negative affect does not necessarily turn the learning switch off. In fact, in Sayaka’s case, it compelled her to behave in the opposite way. When she felt that she was positioned unfavourably in class, she employed various strategies, including building up rapport with her Columbian peers by investing in her Japanese culture. This contributed to a repositioning of her place in this community of learners – of English as second language, in a positive way. She also negotiated with her teacher outside of class to maximise her opportunities to participate in class, and took action to alleviate the workload. As Moran and John-Steiner put it, ‘how a person, emotionally, not just cognitively, perceives his or her place within the social environment has a tremendous impact on the ability to flexibly, and perhaps creatively, respond to the possibilities in that environment’ (Moran & John-Steiner, 2003: 33).

Maki’s stories As described earlier, Maki displayed a strong sense of affinity for English, evident in her ‘akogare’ (desire or aspiration) to become a successful Englishuser. Affinity towards the language is certainly a positive affective variable with respect to language learning (see e.g. Moskowitz, 1999; Richard-Amato, 1988). However, as I noted above, negative emotions may not always lead to diminished learning (Imai, 2010), as can be seen in Sayaka’s narratives. This is relevant for this study if we understand that emotions are socially constructed (Deters, 2010; Imai, 2010). That is, a learner’s affinity for English is dependent on that learner’s past emotional response to English (and/or its learning process), and the memories of these emotions. When we follow Maki’s trajectory of learning English, we are able to identify several instances of positive emotions that contributed to forming a favourable disposition towards English. For instance, she recalled how much she enjoyed watching American television dramas at home with her family. Maki also made reference to how the interactive pedagogical instructional style employed at the language schools was ‘fun and rewarding’. Likewise, talking with her parents’ friends from English-speaking countries was always a source of inspiration to her. Finally, living in the high-school dorm with the returnees was another opportunity that Maki appreciated. In fact, besides her learning experiences at the public junior high school, Maki’s recollection of English learning was characterised as ‘fun’, ‘fruitful’ and ‘productive’. Interestingly, there are few or almost no signs that indicate her learning experiences were negative (with the exception of a journal entry made in the third week, in which she complained that there was too much homework).

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Extract 5.26: Maki’s journal entry May 2008 Wow! The first month is over. I knew from my senpais that the first year is a tough one in terms of content and workload, but I am afraid it is! But, everybody is going through this. Nothing I can’t manage. However, in Excerpt 5.27 Maki’s firm vision of her future L2 self as an Englishuser is seen to have motivated her to work towards becoming a competent L2 user. Her L2 possible self was further promoted by Maki imagining her future self as a global professional, making trips to and from Japan. Excerpt 5.27: Maki I want to major in international studies. I am particularly interested in development. Working for an NGO, perhaps, and going to developing countries. English is a tool that I need to do this. Working in and out of Japan, it’s going to be tough, but that’s the life I want. It is important to note that she portrayed herself as an English-user in international settings, one who travels in and out of Japan. This may suggest that although she would like to become a global professional using English, she does not necessarily appear to be interested in identifying with the target language or culture. How can we account for Maki’s strong sense of vision for her future self? Curious to find out, I posed the question, to which Maki responded by referring to her mother’s occupation, a university lecturer specialising in nursing, and her intentions to learn a second foreign language, French. Excerpt 5.28 (M=Maki R=researcher) M: When I was in tenth grade, I followed my mother to Senegal during the spring break. There at the hospital, I witnessed babies whose mother had died giving birth. The nurse told me that this was because of the lack of necessary medical facilities and staff. I wanted to help out so that there wouldn’t be any more unfortunate stories like this. So, after I graduate from this college, I would like to go to medical school overseas, probably France. R: Why France? M: Well, the tuition for medical school is a lot less expensive than compared to other nations in the world. So, I would like to start taking French here next year as a second language. I think it would be easier for me to study French now that I have the experience of studying English. A conventional, motivation-based approach would describe Maki’s reasons for studying French as instrumental. However, if we examine Maki from an L2 self point of view, we discern that there are two types of imagined communities and visions of an Ideal L2 self in operation (which potentially overlap with each other):

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Table 5.1  A summary of Sayaka’s and Maki’s stories Sayaka

Maki

Past language learning experiences At home, exposed to English from early childhood due largely to her mother’s influence. Had access and regular exposure to a variety of resources outside the formal settings of the language classroom. English was a living language. Home-stay in Singapore during junior high school: very positive impressions. Linguistic gains limited; but cultural experience was great. Contributed to developing her sense of herself as an English-user.

Spent three years abroad in Singapore between the ages of three and six, where Maki attended an international school. Positive impressions: fun and exciting. Had access to resources outside of the confinements of the state school system. Started attending conversational school at junior high school. At home, frequent contacts with nonJapanese nationals. Friends of the family. Had a strong agogare (desire) to be like the returnees. Stronger at high school, surrounded by returnees.

Relationship and orientation to English Overall, has positive impression of English. English as everyday language. Natural to her. English is a medium for communication. Recognised the dual nature of English: English as a school subject (for exams) and English as a means of communication at high school. Dislikes English as a school subject. This can be regarded as an emotional disposition; but on the other hand it can be seen as frustration stemming from the discrepancy between the perceptions of herself as an English-user. At college, notices the difference between ‘everyday, general English’ and ‘academic English’. Feels ambivalent about not being able to contribute fully in classes. Disturbed because of the difference between her Ideal L2 self and her current self. But visions of Ideal L2 self compel her to monitor her own learning. Becomes more agentive towards her own learning.

Had a strong affinity for ‘English’. Considers it to index her identity. Sense of detachment towards learning English at junior high school. Disliked the pedagogical practices. Did not engage with her English classes, although she had sufficient capabilities. Reason: discrepancy between current L2 self and visions of future self as English-user. Regards English as a tool that will help her realise her Ideal L2 self. At her dorm at high school with the community of returnees, she was able to see her Ideal L2 self as attainable (Near Peer Modelling). Affirmed her membership of the broader world of English-users. Positive affirmation assured Maki’s position with the returnees, and in turn contributed to her active participation in her learning.

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Views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future Outside of the school context, she also sees Outside of the realm of the language herself as an English-user. classroom, she saw herself as an EnglishShe portrays herself as an English-user in a user. At the SEA programme, she constructed her global context. She would like to become identity through her own cultural capital. a medical professional. Competence in English provides access to the professional Exercises her agency, and transforms opportunities to which she aspires. identity, and repositions herself more positively in the classroom. Negotiated her identity as well as her competence. Negative emotions contribute to reaffirming her Ideal L2 self as well as positive emotions. In future, she likes to see herself functioning in an international community of English-speakers, taking an active part in discussions.

(1) as a member of an imagined international community of English speakers; (2) as a member of a community of international medical professionals. Her desire to associate herself with these two communities is real. Desire in this context of imagined communities is the driving force to close the gap between past, present and future selves. The stronger the belief in the L2 self, the greater is the intensity of that driving force. We can also view Maki as setting herself the interim goal of becoming an English-speaker in order to become a medical doctor working in developing countries. In other words, English could be regarded as a tool to help her realise her future self.

Chapter Summary This chapter has shown how Sayaka and Maki’s stories help to formulate responses to three primary questions guiding this research, namely, the participants’ language learning experiences, their relationship and orientation to English, and their views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future. What emerged from their experiential narratives were insights into the way they promoted their ideal self as L2 users in an imagined community of international English-speakers, and how emotions were enacted in the process. The findings are summarised in Table 5.1.

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Both Sayaka and Maki had a clear vision of their Ideal L2 self, actively participating in an international community of English-speakers, wherein English is mainly a lingua franca. In the context of the English-medium environment at this liberal arts college and their summer study-abroad experiences, their stories depict how their visions of themselves were authenti­cated and strengthened, as they were afforded the opportunities and resources to ‘personalise’ (Dörnyei, 2005) the desired self. The participants’ emotional trajectory in moving towards their desired future selves is also pertinent to the interests of this study. In general, both participants had positive impressions of the language itself, as well as of their learning experiences. An exception would be the contradiction between English as a school subject versus English as means for communication experienced at junior high school or high school. Furthermore, at college, Sayaka, in particular, expressed an ambivalence towards her learning in her new surroundings. First, she lamented her lack of knowledge of English compared with her peers. Also, we observed how Sayaka faced challenges with her new-found sense of identity as she negotiated her position with her peers and her teacher during the six-week overseas study programme. Significantly, these struggles or frustrations gave her a degree of agency, in that coping with these obstacles contributed to shaping her experiences and her identities.

Notes (1) Full House was a very popular American sitcom television series that ran in prime time from 1987 to 1995. The story is about a widowed father in San Francisco who is raising his three daughters with his two friends. The show includes stories of family love and endearing relationships. With accessible English and enjoyable characters, it continues to be ranked as one of the most popular American television shows in Japan. (2) Shigatu sei (April students) are students who have been educated in the Japanese school system, as explained in Chapter 1. (3) Here, Sayaka felt that she was ‘reading’. Obviously, at this point, we can assume that she lacked the knowledge of English required to comprehend what was contained in the newspaper. (4) Ru Oshiba is a Japanese comedian who speaks a jumble of English and Japanese words.

6 Megumi’s and Yui’s Stories: Desire to Create and Develop L2 Possible Selves

This chapter and the next present narratives of participants who initially lacked visions of their Ideal L2 selves. This chapter examines how two participants, Megumi and Yui, successfully formed their Ideal L2 selves in an English-medium institution. Chapter 7, however, depicts the stories of two participants, Hinako and Takehiro, who were unable to generate L2 possible selves. In Chapter 8, I will juxtapose these narratives in order to explore why and how it was possible for one group of participants to create a desired L2 self, while for another group the task seemed insurmountable. At the outset of the academic year, both Megumi and Yui lacked any clear vision of their L2 possible selves but, as the term progressed, they were able to develop their desired L2 selves through experiences in the all-English environ­ment of the research site, and also through their intercultural ex­periences made possible by their summer study-abroad programmes. What figures prominently in their stories is a developmental process where the present learning situation serves to activate or create or alter visions of the learner’s L2 future self. In Dörnyei’s L2 Motivational Self System (see Chapter 2), the L2 learning experience is concerned with how the ‘immediate learning environment and experience (e.g. the impact of the teacher, the curriculum, the peer group, the experience of success)’ (Dörnyei, 2009: 29) influences the other two self-guides, the Ideal L2 self and the ought-to L2 self. The narratives of Megumi and Yui illustrate how their learning environ­ment played a key role in activating or generating future self-images, in other words, the contextual influences on the formation of their L2 selves. Their stories also highlight how the emotional state of the participants is intricately implicated in the process, and shows very clearly how past learning experiences interact with the present learning environment in creating an L2-using self. Wenger reminds us that the past has a role to play in the present and future: 105

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It is through imagination that we see our own practices as continuing histories that reach far into the past…. By taking us into the past and carrying us into the future, it can recast the present and show it as holding unsuspected possibilities. (Wenger, 1998: 178) Future self-images do not come from internally or externally generated self-images but, rather, are created with the learner’s active engagement with the learning process, where, as Dörnyei contends, there is a tendency for prior success to promote a successful L2 self (Dörnyei, 2009). However, the following narratives indicate that negative experiences can be just as forceful in the construction of an Ideal L2 self.

Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences Megumi’s stories Megumi is from a part of Tokyo commonly referred to as the ‘shitamachi’ area, which includes famous sight-seeing spots such as Asakusa. She was born in this part of Tokyo and had lived in the area with her parents and her older brother all her life. Her mother was a full-time housewife and her father worked for an insurance company. Similar to Sayaka, Megumi’s first encounter with English was listening to a collection of songs from Walt Disney’s movies, which her mother would play for her. Megumi was not particularly interested in them, but she remembers that the first song she was able to sing in English was the ABC song (it is interesting to note that the ABC song was not included in the collection of songs from Walt Disney). Megumi recalls that it was also her mother who suggested she start learning English at her pre-school. Once a week Megumi attended these English classes, until she was in the first grade. Excerpt 6.1: Megumi A foreigner (gaijin) would come to our pre-school and we would sing songs and play games. Learn words by repeating after the teacher, like ‘fish, fish, fish’. I don’t think I could speak English, but that was okay for me. I just wanted to be there because it was a way to be with my friends. We all took the same English lessons. At the primary level, Megumi started taking English lessons at a small, private language school in her neighbourhood. The classes at small language schools like the one that Megumi attended are similar to private tutoring. They are usually managed by Japanese English teachers who, using their homes as classrooms, teach English mainly to grade school children. Since they teach at home, they are commonly referred to as ‘home teachers’. In fact, these small-scale English classrooms are a vibrant sector of the commercial language school industry in Japan (Makarova, 2004; Ryan & Makarova,

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2004). The teachers who work there are similar to the so-called ‘backpack teachers’,1 in that they have received virtually no training in teaching English. Many of the teachers are housewives who, in one way or another, have strong inclinations towards English. Usually the ‘home teachers’ are employed by subsidiaries of major Japanese publishing companies, which provide the bulk of their teaching materials (Makarova, 2004). The instructional style employed is basically structural, with a great emphasis on form, but a large part of it is entertainment-focused and game-oriented: the linguistic content is taught through activities like singing songs, playing games, listening to stories and engaging in patterned conversation. In such a context, Megumi learned the alphabet and to use some basic words and idiomatic expressions such as ‘How are you?’ and ‘Fine, thank you’. The main language of instruction was English, but Megumi communicated with her friends (and sometimes the teacher) in Japanese. Excerpt 6.2: Megumi The lessons at this school certainly weren’t boring, but, come to think of it now, I don’t think I was there to learn English. I think I wanted to be with my friends. The teacher spoke to us in English (with Japanese sometimes), but we spoke to each other in Japanese! I didn’t like the exams that we had to take, but that didn’t stop me from going! A common practice with ‘home teachers’ is the use of proficiency tests commonly known as EIKEN or STEP. In Excerpt 6.2, by ‘exams’, Megumi was referring to such tests. Since it is difficult to ‘measure’ learners’ pro­ ficiency in a situation where there is a lack of sufficient opportunities to use English, the scores on these tests serve as indicators for learners’ to keep track of their progress (or the lack of it). It was a tangible way for learners (not to mention their parents) to monitor their learning and to motivate children to continue learning through the possibility of getting good test results. Furthermore, for these small-scale English schools, having many successful EIKEN or STEP exam-takers is a major means of promotion. However, Megumi was not keen on learning English at this language school; nor was she enthusiastic about having to take the English proficiency tests. At least, as she says, ‘all of my friends were there, and I was told that it will be useful when taking the college entrance exams’. She noted that although her experience of learning English at this language school may have been useful to improve her listening skills, she failed to see other benefits. Megumi’s main recollection of learning English at the secondary level was that it was a series of exams. During her six years of secondary education in the public school system, the pedagogical approach was traditional, with an emphasis on language structure. Teachers would use a governmentapproved textbook that followed a curriculum specified by the government. Many hours were allocated to language forms, including grammar and

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phrasal expressions. Rote memory and pattern practices were the dominant instructional styles, coupled with another commonly used pedagogical practice, the translation method. Megumi explained that teachers ‘used Japanese to translate everything’; it was ‘exam-oriented English’. Although Megumi generally thought the once-a-week conversation classes that were led by native English speakers were more enjoyable (asobi) than the ones led by the Japanese English teachers, she liked the reading-aloud strategies used in the reading classes taught by Japanese English teachers the most. She thought she was able to get a ‘feel’ of the language and get accustomed to (nareru) the ‘sound’ of English, which would prove useful in the future. There are significant differences between Megumi’s narrative and those of our two earlier participants, Sayaka and Maki (Chapter 5), with respect to their relationship and orientation to English. For instance, in Sayaka’s case, she was provided with ample English language learning resources both at school and at home, and her story conveys an overall positive attitude to English and learning English. However, although Megumi did not use negative emotive expressions per se, one senses a kind of ‘detachment’ and lack of interest in English and learning English. As we have observed, she found little use in learning English because ‘using’ it was not a realistic option for her. Although she started taking English lessons from a very early age, unlike Sayaka, she did not find them particularly interesting. Instead, she continued taking these lessons because ‘everyone else was doing it’ and also because she believed in the general understanding that ‘learning English will give me a head start and will be useful for college entrance exams and my future’ (from Megumi’s transcript). Megumi was exposed to the official discourse that emphasised instrumental motives for learning English and had a strong sense of obligation to study English. This is characteristic of the ought-to L2 self, the second component of Dörnyei’s Motivational Self System, where there is a concern for the ‘attributes that one believes that one ought to possess to meet expectations and to avoid possible negative outcomes’ (Dörnyei, 2009: 28). Higgins notes that there are two aspects to instrumentality: the approach–avoid tendency, which is promotion focused, and the prevention focus, which is concerned with safety, responsibilities and obligation (Higgins, 1987, 1998). In Megumi’s case, her instrumental motives are more to do with the latter: she repeatedly notes that her reason for learning English is to be with her friends and for its potential advantage for the entrance exams.

Yui’s stories Yui’s learning trajectory follows the path of the majority of English language learners in Japan: a traditional style of language learning pedagogy that is predominantly structural, with a focus on exam preparations. Raised in the Kansai area of Japan, Yui was born in Osaka, but her family

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moved to Nara when she was three years old. Yui has lived in Nara with her younger brother and sister ever since. When Yui was in third grade, she started taking English conversation classes at a local language school. She does not remember why she started taking English lessons, but at that time it appeared to be the ‘right thing’ to do because all her friends seemed to be doing so. She recalls that she had a lot of fun singing songs and playing games. She continued her English lessons until she was in the sixth grade. Excerpt 6.4: Yui I didn’t have any particular reason why I wanted to take English lessons, but many of my friends decided to go to this language school, so I just went along with their ideas. I didn’t want to be left out. But it was fun! Besides, it was cool to be able to say English words. At her private junior high school, Yui did not find English difficult, but she remembers that there was a lot of emphasis on grammar and vocabulary learning. The teachers used a standard textbook that was structured around a conventional syllabus with focus on form. Traditional teaching activities were used, such as teacher explanations of language, comprehension tasks, grammar and vocabulary exercises with feedback sessions. She strongly disliked these English classes and found them extremely boring. However, she recalled one type of assignment that she found helpful: self-instruction television and radio language programmes. On commercial Japanese television and radio, there is a vast array of programmes designed for language instruction (Moody, 2006, 2012; Umino, 2002, 2005). NHK (Nippon Housou Kyoukai), a publicly funded broadcasting company, offers the largest selection of programmes. Many of the NHK educational programmes are supplemented with textbooks (available for purchase at any local bookstore at a very reasonable price), which learners can use to confirm their understanding of the main linguistic points targeted in each lesson. Yui also found them to be useful in providing her with additional practice and vocabulary. Excerpt 6.5: Yui I learned a lot from these broadcasted language programmes. They were more entertaining than our classes at school. It gave me some more time to practice. I didn’t like my English classes at school, but that doesn’t mean that I disliked English. That’s why I started to learn English at a conversation school. The fact that Yui liked English is an important factor that contributed to her motivation to learn the language. Although she did not find the instructional practices in the setting of a formal language classroom conducive to learning, this did not discourage her from learning it. Thus, Yui started

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taking English lessons outside of school, at a local English conversation school. At this school, she had weekly lessons in ‘conversational English’ with a native English speaker and with a Japanese English teacher studied the more ‘formal’ aspects of English, such as grammar or vocabulary geared towards preparing students for exams. The approach taken in the classes with the Japanese English teacher would be more like the classes at her school, but Yui enjoyed these lessons more than the ones at school, as she explained: Excerpt 6.6: Yui The classes were much smaller, with only four or five or us [versus 40 at her junior high school]. Plus there were more interactions with the teacher and other students. It was fun talking to the teacher, and also other students, because we all came from different schools. We all had interesting and different stories [hanashi] to tell. Even the boring practices like reciting passages from the textbook was quite fun here. At first glance, activities such as reading aloud a passage from an English text or shadowing a text would appear to be monotonous, but surprisingly Yui found these tasks quite interesting. As she described in her interview, she felt enjoyment in working with small groups, such that even during an exercise of mimicry (such as shadowing), she was able to experience a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. Furthermore, for learners such as Megumi and Yui, who have a strong sense of an ought-to self, monotonous tasks such as choral reading, textbook exercises and sequential reading may be perceived as ‘safe’ practices (Chick, 1996), since they do not threaten student self-identity. Excerpt 6.7: Yui When we shadowed a text, we would record these sentences, and listen to each other. This was quite embarrassing, but we had a lot of fun giving comments to each other. Besides, reading aloud, rather than reading silently, helps you get the feel of English. It was good to be able to work in groups or pairs. Yui looked forward to her English lessons at this language school and continued to attend the classes until she was a senior in high school (at which time she had to quit in order to attend a cram school to prepare for her college exams). Yui described how, once in high school, her dislike for studying English increased. ‘English’ was grouped largely into two areas: oral communication and reading/grammar (details in Chapter 1), following the government curriculum. Teachers took a didactic approach, whereby the necessary information was provided by them and little room was left for students to think,

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reflect or engage. Instructional practice in a reading- and grammar-oriented class usually consisted of the teacher checking the learners’ sentence by sentence translation of a text that had been assigned as homework. Other practices might include the choral reading aloud of sentences and checking homework answers to exercises in their prescribed textbooks or from a teacher-made worksheet. Compared with such conventional approaches, the oral communication classes, with a native English speaker coming in to teach once a week, would seem to be more attractive to Yui, but she still found them to be boring. As she explained: Excerpt 6.8: Yui I guess even the oral communication classes were less attractive since I felt that we won’t be using English. English seemed to be a ‘thing’ here. Boredom and apathy were defining characteristics of her English learning experience. A heavy emphasis on conscious learning as opposed to maximising opportunities to use a foreign language discouraged Yui from investing in her language learning: Excerpt 6.9: Yui The ‘oral communication’ classes were more like the ‘English’ classes I took when I was in grade school, but, when I think back about it, it was a series of drills. But we took turns, and had to role-play, so we thought we were speaking in English, but it didn’t feel like we were using English to communicate. One question that intrigued the researcher was how to account for her ‘liking’ of English, an enjoyment which she appeared to have maintained over a long period of time. English in school contexts was certainly not a positive language learning experience for Yui. Then how was it possible for Yui to continue investing in her learning? Unlike Sayaka or Maki, her parents were not particularly interested in their children’s language education. Thus, it would be difficult to explain it in terms of resources. However, Yui’s following story about her aunt may shed some light on this question: Excerpt 6.10: Yui I have an aunt, my mother’s younger sister, that I greatly admire and adore. She is fluent in English, and travels all over the world. I wanted to be like her. At one time, when I was in high school, we went on abroad on a holiday with her, and she was so cool! Although I had spent several years studying at English language schools, I got tongue-tied, and was so nervous, the words just didn’t come out of my mouth. But here, you see my aunt, speaking fluently! I felt that I had to try harder [ganbaru].

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It appears that her aunt was a role-model for her. Whereas the returnees were role–models for Maki (Chapter 5), for Yui it was her aunt. The concept of Near Peer Modelling (Murphey, 2007; Murphey & Arao, 2001; Murphey et al., 2005) is based on the ‘fact that it is easier to step into the shoes of someone who is like you, rather than a distant role model’ (Murphey, 2007: 79). Yui’s akogare (desire) to become like her aunt, and the affinity for English that she had developed through her language learning experience at her language school, undoubtedly contributed to creating a vision of her possible self as a successful L2 user. In terms of the notion of the L2 ideal self, the vision of a future L2 self encouraged her to continue investing in her learning, despite the fact that she did not like studying English as a school subject. In fact, ‘coming to like English’ (eigo wo sukini naru), or the opposite, was one of the most frequently used emotive expressions in the interviews with many of my participants. Such volitional engagement in the learning process suggests the need for a discussion of what the learners mean when they say that they ‘like English’. Ryan (2009) identifies four main strands of ‘coming to like English’ among young Japanese English learners (using data derived from a total of 2397 participants from five tertiary institutions and four secondary institutions across Japan): first, simple pleasure or joy from actual contact or engagement with the language; second, a sense of personal liberation associated with the use of English, especially among Japanese females; third, the role of English as a means of personal development; and finally, the social status associated with speaking English. Yui’s interview excerpts allow us to surmise that when she states that she likes English, it corresponds to Ryan’s first and third strands of ‘liking English’. Thus, positive identification with the values associated with the language could contribute to the formation of an Ideal L2 self (Murphey, 2007; Ryan, 2009). Unlike Sayaka and Maki, both Megumi and Yui’s visions of their desired L2 selves, as well as their awareness of themselves as English-users, clearly had not yet been formed at this stage.

Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present Megumi’s stories Although Megumi had been attending English conversation school since kindergarten, and therefore was ‘exposed’ to English from an early age, English was basically a formal school subject associated with exams that had little functional purpose. Although the family had frequently holidayed in Hawaii and Guam, it is interesting that Megumi did not appear to be willing to take advantage of these opportunities to use her knowledge of English.

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Excerpt 6.11: Megumi English was another subject we had to study at school. Our family went on holidays abroad, but we always had a Japanese-speaking guide. I didn’t need to use my English. It didn’t occur to me that I could be using English. To me, English was a language that gaijin [foreigners] used, and I didn’t think it was a ‘tool’ to use for us to communicate with them. Unlike Sayaka and Maki, English to Megumi did not represent a means of communication. Instead, it was a cultural symbol or an artefact belonging to a foreign culture. In fact, she expressed little interest in actually integrating with the English-speaking community. In the earlier excerpts, she consistently refers to the need to learn English for exams, and also emphasised its instrumental potential for her future career. Compared with Sayaka and Maki, Megumi expressed only vague ambitions for the future during her first interview: Excerpt 6.12: Megumi=M, R=researcher M: If we study English, it would be useful to pass the entrance exams. English will also open up a lot of doors to different kinds of careers. So, I know it is important to study and get good grades for English. R: Any plans for the future? Anything you want to do? M: Not really…. I’m not quite sure…. Having grown up in a family that had minimal exposure to English (unlike Sayaka and Maki), Megumi had little contact with foreigners. She therefore had vague and undeveloped visions of an English-using self. Instead, Megumi was influenced by the official discourse that emphasised the importance of English as a school subject, which generated a strong sense of obligation to learn English. However, two months after first being immersed in the English-medium university environment, Megumi’s attitude towards English went through a major transformation. Gradually, she was able to envision herself as an English-user, evident in the interview excerpts which follow. In her second and subsequent interviews, her orientation to English and learning English was quite positive. She claimed she was adjusting quite well to her new learning environment and she enthusiastically pointed out that she was not learning English, but learning in English. She found this more interesting and fulfilling and, for the first time, it appeared that she was able to picture herself as an English-user. Excerpt 6.13: Megumi With overseas students, returnees, and people who are good at speaking English here on campus, you get a feeling that ‘English’ isn’t just in the textbooks. It’s real! You can see people using it. This was quite new to me. And, it’s fun to use English to communicate your ideas. At high

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school, the questions we were asked in our English classes were very simple; you could respond to them by just saying yes or no. But now, I have to think, and try to put my opinions into one coherent argument. It’s challenging, but interesting. In the second interview, she also mentioned that English had increasingly become a part of her everyday life. Now, she could say ‘I’m home’ instead of tadaima (although she quickly added that her family members did not understand this, except for her older brother, who had also ex­ perienced a summer study-abroad programme). This new positive ‘affinity’ towards English had also motivated her to watch foreign movies in English. She appeared to be satisfied (indeed, quite pleased) with herself. She had developed an interest in using English. Excerpt 6.14: Megumi I am trying to watch foreign movies without the subtitles. I’m sort of interested in acting, so it’s also good for my acting. Oh, yes … I’ve decided to join the acting club [Engeki bu]. I’m really busy with that … I have to try to balance it out with my studies. I already feel that I am falling behind…. But I think watching American TV shows is good for language learning. You watch it many times and, after a while, you start to feel you are part of that world! Besides, you can see how certain expressions are used. Megumi’s reference to watching foreign movies parallels Maki’s story (Excerpt 5.8), in that they both regard them as effective language learning material. But what is more interesting to this study is how pop culture materials2 can serve to support the emergence and realisation of an L2 self. A growing body of work that examines the role of pop culture in the language learning process, especially in relation to the notion of imagined commun­ ities, shows that it motivates people to learn English (Chik & Briedbach, 2011; Menezes, 2008; Murray, 2008a, 2008b, 2011; Sade, 2011). Movies and television shows portray imagined communities that learners can aspire to participate in, and belong to, one day. By repeatedly viewing movies and shows, learners not only make attempts to gain linguistic and pragmatic knowledge, but also increase their sense of belonging through alignment to this imagined community. Needless to say, the role of imagination here is crucial but, as Norton (2001) explains, imagination alone does not lead to action, whereas alignment does. This sense of belonging to a community that learners desire to participate in is a crucial factor in the emergence and construction of one’s possible self (Dörnyei, 2009; Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009; MacIntrye et al., 2009). The researcher also noticed Megumi’s frequent use of the phrase ‘eigo ni naretekita’. Eigo means English, and naretekita, translated literally, means

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‘get used to’ or ‘to get accustomed to’. In fact, many of the participants claimed that they had ‘got used to English’ (eigo ni naretekita) during the first two months at this college. The researcher asked Megumi whether she considered ‘getting used to English’ would be a major factor in her learning process. Excerpt 6.15: Megumi Oh, yes. Definitely. The more I feel that I have become more got used [naretekita] to English, the easier it would be for me to take in things [sun nari haiutte kuru]. But what exactly did Megumi need to’ get used to’ (nareru)? From Excerpts 6.16 and 6.17, we see that this involved various factors, ranging from how English was conceptualised in her new environment to the differences in instructional approaches and interactional styles used by teachers, as well as with her peers. For Megumi, these were some of the primary sources of adjustment difficulties in the English-medium context. In Excerpt 6.16 she discusses this in terms of her listening skills, whereas in Excerpt 6.17 she mentions the difficulties she encountered in terms of her speaking pro­ ficiency. Excerpt 6.16: Megumi Compared with junior high and high school, here, everything is done in English. We don’t study English in Japanese as we used to. You listen to ‘natural English’. I’m used to it [naretekita] a little bit now, but I could not understand a large part of what the teacher (and my classmates) were saying. So, what I had to do was to catch individual words, and try to guess. I was afraid that I would miss something important. So, during lunch, or after school, we would exchange information to make sure we had not missed anything. You know, particularly, what we had to do for our next class. As for speaking, we had to speak in English even amongst ourselves in class. Excerpt 6.17: Megumi At high school, we did have opportunities to practise our speaking skills, but it was usually like repeating sentences after the teacher or reading a text aloud. Of course, I spoke a couple of words with the native Englishspeaking teacher who would visit our oral communication classes once a week, but it was hardly a conversation. We just spoke some words, like ‘How are you?’ But, here, we are asked to express our opinions and ideas in English! What a difference. I have gotten used to it [naretekita] now, but, at the beginning of the month, I was really scared that nobody would understand me.

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In Excerpt 6.18, Megumi mentions her experiences in terms of reading, and in Excerpt 6.19 with respect to writing as well. Excerpt 6.18: Megumi I have never read such an amount of English ever in my life [see Chapter 1 for details of the materials used]. It was massive! It was shocking! I was afraid that I would not be able to cope with it. I had to spend hours at home or in the library looking up unfamiliar vocabulary. And think about the comprehension questions that the teacher had given us to prepare for the next class. What we did usually was that we would discuss, in groups, questions from this list of questions. Excerpt 6.19: Megumi In reading academic articles, I found out how important it was to sort of get the gist of the article, rather than aim for a word-for-word translation. At high school, we usually checked the meaning of English words in Japanese, and translated virtually each sentence with our teacher, who would give grammatical explanations about the sentence structure. I learned that this would not work when you have to read a massive amount in a short time! Writing was another obstacle. I was only used to writing a couple of sentences. Not paragraphs, let alone a 1000-word essay! But it’s okay now. I’m not good at writing, but I have become used it to it [naretekita] now and, therefore, feel a bit more under control than at the beginning of the term. As can be observed from Excerpts 6.16–19, there are constant references to the idea of naretikita. In order to comprehend the implications of the term ‘nareru’ in the learning process, I will refer to several traditional notions of learning in Japan, which are characterised by certain metaphorical concepts (Hiraga, 2008). These metaphors are useful to identify the learner’s state of mind or emotion. One of the frequently used traditional metaphorical concepts in Japanese education is learning is following a path: ‘the concept of PATH and hence FOLLOWING the TEACHER along the PATH underlies the general way of thinking about learning and teaching in Japan’ (Hiraga, 2008: 56). The ‘path of the teacher is followed by the disciples, who diligently observe and imitate their teacher from a distance’ (Hiraga, 2008: 57). According to Hiraga (2008), ‘nareru’ is closely tied to the metaphorical meaning of ‘imitating the model’. Learning is understood to occur when learners start imitating what the teacher has to offer. The teacher can offer a model or a pattern (kata) or an example (tehon). In order to imitate the model, one has to practise. Practising here is characterised as nareru. As described in a Japanese proverb, ‘it is better to get accustomed [to something] than to

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study it’ (Narau yori narero). Nareru is used in a positive sense in Japanese educational terminology. If one becomes naretekita, it suggests that one is on the road to ‘mastering’ whatever one is learning. When Megumi states that she is getting used to English, the implication is that she is practising the kata (pattern or model) and is on the ‘path’ to mastering English. Here, one can discern a sense of confidence, and nareru can be interpreted as an emotive expression that indicates a positive learning trajectory. In Excerpt 6.19, Megumi indicates that the more she becomes used to (nareru) English (suggesting that she has got used to its sound, patterns, interactional styles, the university’s unique discourse of English, critical thinking, etc.), the more she can readily accept or take in English (in Megumi’s words, sunnari hairu). For instance, at the outset of the academic year, she had to listen attentively to what had been said to her, but now (in one of her interviews) she even claims that ‘English words just pop out of my mouth’ (kuchi kara po to deru). In terms of Japanese traditional concepts of learning, she was now ready to transform the model, and was also ready to manipulate it to create her own style and model: Kata kara hairi, kata kara deru (to enter by imitating the model, and exit out of the model). Naretekita to English suggests that she was now able to see her English-using self more clearly, and was able to relate herself to English with more confidence. This contributed positively to the formation of her desired L2 self. Megumi’s case is a compelling example of the third component of Dörnyei’s L2 Motivational Self System, the L2 learning experience: that is, how the learning environment, and engagement in the learning processes, contributes to the generation of ideal selves. Immersed in the Englishmedium university environment, Megumi got used to (naretekita) listening and observing how English is used. This, in turn, helped her to generate a view of herself as an English-user, which influenced the way she related to the world. This then prompted her to take initiatives to learn the language and, with the use of pop culture materials in particular, she was able to envision herself functioning in an English-speaking community. In the next section, I will describe how Yui, like Megumi, did not have a clear vision of an English using self but was able to generate one, in a different way.

Yui’s stories Accounts of her language learning experiences in the previous section illustrate that despite Yui’s conceptualisation of English as a communicative tool, English at school was presented in a way that meant she could discern little relationship to how this language could connect with life outside the classroom. As a result, she found herself less and less receptive towards English as taught by a traditional teacher-led approach and exams. However, like Megumi, Yui’s few months at this college changed her orientation to English. For the first time, she met returnees and Japanese

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students with extensive experience abroad, not to mention many foreign exchange students, as well as non-Japanese teachers from a variety of countries. For the first time, she witnessed ‘English in action’: she was able to observe at first hand how people interact and communicate in English. Excerpt 6.18: Yui I was pleasantly surprised to see Japanese and non-Japanese people (both students and teachers) talking to each other in English naturally, just as we would in Japanese on every day topics [futsu ni shaberu]. It is funny, come to think of it now, but I realised for the first time that English is a language that people use every day. It was refreshing to see the returnees, answer their mobiles [keitais] to make arrangements for Friday night, for example. Now that Yui was immersed in English on campus, the language had become ‘usual’ (futsu) to Yui. She recognised using English as something not ‘extraordinary’ but as an everyday occurrence (nichijyouka). She no longer regarded English as a ‘special’ (tokubetsu) language. Instead, Yui was now able to perceive that English is a language that is used to communicate in a multicultural community and one that she hoped she would be able to identify with in the future. She added that she was not alarmed or surprised anymore when a non-Japanese person started a conversation in English: ‘I’m not nervous or I don’t have to prepare myself [migameru]when people talk to me in English anymore’ (from her transcript). Yui described herself as basically a shy person. It was not easy for her to make friends, and she was usually taken aback with people who were outspoken. However, Yui noted how the differences in instructional practices at college had helped her to become more expressive orally. She also emphasised how such pedagogical approaches had helped her to perceive English and learning English in different ways. In particular, she mentioned how group discussions conducted in classes were especially helpful: Extract 6.19: Yui’s journal entry, May 2008 Group discussions are something that I have had little experience with. During the break, I met up with my friend from high school who goes to a different university in Tokyo. She thinks it’s rare to have group discussions at the university level because most classes are one-way lecture-type classes. I realized that I have come to a unique university. In other words, Yui thinks that using English in a meaningful manner had given her the opportunity to take a more active role in group discussions. At the start of the first term, coming from a teacher-fronted instructional style, she found it difficult to interact with her peers in the discussions. The interactional style of group discussions perplexed Yui more than linguistic

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issues. These group discussions were usually led by the returnees or students who had studied abroad. Their actions served as models for her to follow. Excerpt 6.20 I soon realised that people were saying different things, each from their own standpoint, and that was acceptable. I think this helped me to reassure me that my opinion would be valued as much as anybody else’s. At the beginning, I could only say ‘I think so’ or merely nod. I couldn’t respond when a question was directed at me. But by mimicking [maneshita] how and what the returnees responded, I think I got used to things [naretekita]. It felt great to be able to contribute in discussions! Here again, we can witness the Japanese themes of learning ‘naretekita’ (get used to) and ‘maneshita’ (mimicry) echoed in the changes of her inter­ actional style in group discussions. The outspoken returnees, the proficient English-users in her class, acted as models (or tehon) and, by following their model (maneshita), Yui attempted to assimilate and internalise them. It also encouraged Yui that different opinions were valued and respected, which was not common at the secondary level. She recalled how difficult it was to contradict the dominant opinion in high school. Undoubtedly, Yui’s active engagement with her peers contributed greatly to reinforcing the vision of her English-using self. Evidence of further change was noted in the following excerpt from her weekly journal entry, three months into the research. Yui explains that she is not very conscious of her grammatical errors anymore. In her journal entry she stated that: Extract 6.21: Yui’s journal entry, June 2008 I don’t pay that much attention to them [grammatical mistakes] that much anymore. I could not speak because I was afraid of making mistakes or my friends would see me as dumb. But, now, I think what is more important for me is to speak up, and express my opinions. Here we see her undergoing change and possibly moving towards transformation. As she felt increasingly able to contribute to class discussions, she also became more tolerant of her own perceived, limited English and oral performance. This illustrates how new perspectives can be used to reconceive past experience, a feature characteristic of experiential narratives. Through current interactions with her peers, Yui was able to reframe her past experiences and simultaneously discovered potential uses of English in the future. Yui’s experience shows how ‘future self-states can have a strong psychological reality in the current imaginative experiences of the learners’ (Ushioda, 2011: 20). That is:

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to the extent that language learners engage (or are able to engage) their current selves in their interactions in the classroom … one can argue that they are also enabled to engage directly with their future possible selves as users of the target language, but within the scope and security of their current communicative abilities. (Ushioda, 2011: 20) Yui’s narrative also exemplifies how the learning environment, and meaningful interactions, present various opportunities to facilitate the emergence and construction of learners’ desired L2 selves. As a result, it came as no surprise to find out that Yui, who now was more strongly invested in English, applied for the six-week summer study-abroad programme.

Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future Megumi’s stories As noted earlier, although Megumi had begun to learn English from a very early age, she had failed to develop a positive relationship with the language or an affinity with people who use the language. For Megumi, English was, first and foremost, a language which foreigners (gaijin) used, and it had little relevance to her. This may be because she had limited opportunities to actually use English. English education at the secondary level did not do much to change her disposition towards English either. The predominantly form-focused and exam-oriented approach did not elevate the status of English for her. However, at college, Megumi was finally able to frame English and English learning from a different angle, by adopting a broader and a more personal perspective. Her conceptualisation of English expanded to include not only the Anglophone norms but also the different varieties of ‘Englishes’ used by overseas students on campus. English became personalised and she now felt ‘closer’ to the language, because she was required to use it in a meaningful way. Extract 6.20 (M=Megumi, R=researcher) M: I felt for the first time an affinity with English. It wasn’t anything formal [katai]. Neither was it difficult [taihen]. It was something that was used in everyday life and something you use to communicate with people. I felt an affinity towards English. Also, I realised that people had different accents, and that was okay. R: What do you mean by ‘formal’ [katai]? M: Well, at junior high and high school, for instance, you learn a certain sentence structure or an idiomatic phrase and how they are used. You

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get the impression that they are the only sentence patterns or words that you could use to convey the same meaning. But here, you can improvise. You don’t have to follow one rule. There can be other rules to get the same effect. In Excerpt 6.21 (from her second interview), Megumi is pleased to perceive some improvements in her linguistic skills, particularly in terms of her pronunciation. Such positive reinforcement is important in authenticating and sustaining visions of future selves (MacIntyre et al., 2009). Excerpt 6.21 I feel that my pronunciation has improved here at college. Although from the beginning I don’t think it was too bad [laugh]. After all, I had been taking English classes from pre-school. But, at high school, when the teacher asked me to read a passage from the textbook in front of my classmates, I deliberately used the Japanese accent. This was because, first, it was not necessary for others to understand me. We were all following the same text. They didn’t have to listen to me. They may very well have read to themselves silently – it was all there in the book. And, also, I felt a bit embarrassed to read it ‘English-like’. I didn’t want to boast about my pronunciation. So I used the Japanese accent. But here at college, you need to have good pronunciation for people to under­stand you. I felt pleased when my peers told me that I have a good English accent. In her third interview, Megumi was also encouraged by how she was now able to contribute to group discussions more easily than she could at the outset of the academic year, three months ago. At high school, she felt she could remain silent and no one would reprimand her, but at university she felt she had to say something, to participate actively in class, using English. She felt that her active participation in group discussions contributed in building a vision of herself as an English-user: ‘English is real here’. Megumi added that the learning environment at high school had made her too selfconscious about how people would react to her English and her ideas, but: Excerpt 6.22: Megumi Here, at college, they give you a lot of opportunities to organise and express your opinions. It wasn’t about what was right or wrong. At high school, I was using idiomatic expressions, and just saying yes or no to the questions the teacher or my classmates asked me. Here, I feel comfortable, and more confident about what I am saying. In her final interview, before the summer break, I sensed that there was an overall feeling of ‘confidence’ in the way Megumi talked about herself.

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She attributed this change in her manner to belonging to an ‘acting club’ (engeki club), one of the most active groups on campus. Her contributions there were acknowledged by her fellow club-mates, and she felt for the first time that her actions were recognised and validated. The confidence that was nurtured in this community of actors appears to have influenced her identity as an English-learner as well. That is, the favourable identity she constructed via her acting club had a spill-over effect and gave her confidence in group discussions in English. Excerpt 6.23: Megumi I just loved my acting club. They accepted me as is. During junior or high school, I felt that people regarded me as a ‘strange’ kid. So I felt conscious about what I said or did. But now, I can do and say what I want – I found out. I think this has given me the courage to speak up in English in the classes as well. In this English-medium environment, Megumi was gradually able to see herself as an English-user. Dörnyei (2009: 36) contends that images of an ideal self ‘are only effective insomuch as the individual perceives them as possible, that is, realistic within the person’s particular circumstances’. Thus, a reality component needed to be added to the desired self that Megumi envisioned. This was accomplished by a sense of improvement in terms of linguistic skills (with regard to pronunciation, see Excerpt 6.21) in addition to her confidence in participating in group discussions. She felt that her actions were validated and acknowledged, and thus her Ideal L2 self had become a realistic goal to pursue. It was no surprise to find out that she had applied for the six-week summer study-abroad programme at the University of York in the UK. She explained this decision as follows: Excerpt 6.24: Megumi Now that I feel more comfortable with the language, and have less fear about communicating with people who speak a different language, I wanted to go abroad. That is, not just with my family on holidays with Japanese tour guides, but on my own to study. In the interview that followed her return from the study-abroad programme, Megumi described her experience as ‘great!’ She was not sure if the experience had a substantial effect in developing her linguistic performance, but the rewarding and enriching experience of interacting with people from different cultures was a great discovery for her. Excerpt 6.25: Megumi I really appreciated the talks with friends I made there. Especially with one particular Spanish student. We keep in touch through emails. I

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found out that although my English is not perfect, people will try to under­stand you. They don’t usually ridicule you because of your English. By asking them to repeat things, and rephrasing things, you can make yourself understood. You don’t have to be perfect! It’s okay to make mistakes. The York summer programme was organised in a similar way to Sayaka’s programme in Canada. In the mornings, the classes were more oriented to language exercises; in the afternoons, the approach was more open-ended and project-based. Planning a weekend trip to London was one such project, which would require the students to work in groups, and make travel arrangements (e.g. booking train tickets, accommodation, etc.) and plan sightseeing trips. Finally, they were required to make a presentation of their preparations prior to their trip and also to report on the trip upon their return. Not surprisingly, such hands-on projects were very appealing to the students, as Megumi said: Excerpt 6.26: Megumi These afternoon projects were fun! I also liked to do volunteer work in the stores in the high streets. We rotated stores every afternoon for about a week. This was another highlight of my stay in York. Yes, you were actually communicating! It was great! These were the positive aspects of Megumi’s narratives of her studies in York, which had propelled her to take more initiative. As she was interested in acting, she would search websites and seek information on the most sought-after shows in that area. She would arrange to purchase the tickets herself, sometimes with the help of her host family, and find directions to the theatre on her own. She enjoyed all of these tasks immensely. As she noted in one of her weekly email exchanges with the researcher, ‘I am learning and using English. It feels great!’ On the other hand, Megumi also mentioned several challenges she encountered while at York. One difficulty was related to the variety of interactional patterns in class group discussions. The students came from a wide range of places and cultures: Kuwait, China, Spain, Italy, Germany and, of course, Japan. One-third of the students in Megumi’s classes were from Kuwait. Megumi found these students ‘quite vocal sometimes even to the point of being obnoxious’ (from Megumi’s email). Excerpt 6.27 (M=Megumi, R=researcher) M: I had a hard time with these students from Kuwait and China. In group discussions, they were so loud! Don’t these people know how to listen? The Chinese would try to stop the Kuwaitis sometimes. But it didn’t help much. They just kept going. And even if I had something to

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say, by the time it was my turn I would have forgotten what to say; or, many times, by then the discussion would have headed in a different direction. R: What did you do? Did you take any actions? Why do you think they were so dominating? Would you say they were more competent Englishspeakers? M: No, not really. I don’t think I did anything. I think I just gave up. Although the teacher noticed it and she tried to facilitate things. Their English was not much different from ours, but they had more fluency. The fact that Megumi did not take any action is interesting. Recall how Sayaka exercised her agency to construct a favourable identity with her classmates and her teacher by investing in her identity as Japanese. Megumi, however, had no interest in building rapport with her classmates or teacher, and henceforth made no particular moves. She was indifferent towards the self that she projected. How can we account for the differences in behaviour between Sayaka and Megumi? Many reasons could be suggested but, from a possible self perspective, could it not be explained in terms of a lack of a strong vision on the part of Megumi as a future English-user? Having a clear future vision of herself as a successful English-user, Sayaka was determined to make the most of her study programme; Megumi, on the other hand, had only just begun to form a vision of her Ideal L2 self.

Yui’s stories Yui’s story is also an example of how the L2 learning experience can facilitate the emergence of possible selves. Immersed in the English- medium environment and interacting in English, Yui began to conceptualise English as a natural part [futsu] of her college life. Framing English in this manner, she was able to imagine her English-using self becoming a reality. As observed, Yui had akogare (a desire) to become a fluent English-speaker, like her aunt. For any action to occur, the ‘model’ needs to be activated, but it was only through experiences at college that Yui was able to authenticate her ‘dreams’ and perceive them to be achievable. As noted in Chapter 5, ‘The relation between what students want to become and what students actually become may be mediated by what students feel they are able to become’ (Pizzolato, 2006: 59). Excerpt 6.28: Yui It’s true that I always wanted to be like my aunt. She also was living proof that I could be like her if I tried hard enough.

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As in Megumi’s case, the bilingual or multilingual community of the new learning environment helped to broaden Yui’s conception of English as an international language. She was impressed by the range of ideas expressed by her peers and was encouraged by the fact that diversity was valued. Excerpt 6.29: Yui Talking to returnees in my club in English, I realised that there were a lot of perspectives on a certain issue. People had various ideas on a topic, and that it was okay to have different ideas. At first, I was reluctant to express my ideas, lest people think I am not competent. But now, I don’t care so much what others think of me. I guess it’s because I realised that it was okay to have different opinions. Thus, Yui’s possible self was substantiated and reinforced by a supportive language learning environment that enabled her to formulate, express and exchange her ideas in front of people. This undoubtedly helped her to anchor her aspirations to become a fluent English-user like her aunt. Images of a future possible self were further maintained and opera­ tionalised through her participation in a six-week summer study-abroad programme in New Zealand. Excerpt 6.30: Yui Returning to Japan, I don’t think I am as conscious about the accuracy of my English as before. I feel more relaxed about making mistakes. Interacting in English with a lot of people has helped me see that, more than speaking with accuracy, what counts most is the content of what you are trying to say. I think I got used to using [naretekita] English and I don’t feel any hesitancy [teikou ga nai] about using English. Although I am not fluent in speaking, I feel more confident in using English. It is noteworthy that Yui reframes her conceptualisation of English and her position as an English-user. She does not perceive herself within the deficit framework of a non-native English-speaker, but redefines herself and her identity in a more positive light by investing in her multiple identities: in this case, her identity as Japanese. This positive transformation of herself no doubt contributed to strengthening the vision of her Ideal L2 self. Excerpt 6.31: Yui’s weekly report, 16 August 2008 There was a small party at my host parents’ house today. It was a cosy gathering and I had a terrific time. It was a very exciting day for me. A couple of people had visited Japan and we talked about Japan! I think I was able to sound more confident when talking to them because I was telling them about my culture. The highlight for me was when a couple of people there complimented me on my English. I was just overwhelmed and felt that my efforts had not been in vain!

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Table 6.1  A summary of Megui’s and Yui’s stories Megumi

Yui

Past language learning experiences Attends English conversation lessons from grade school since all her friends seem to be doing so. As a consequence, displays a strong sense of obligation to learn the language (ought-to self) Limited interactions with English-speakers. Few resources to facilitate language learning at home At junior high and high school, feels dubious about learning English. There is a sense of detachment towards English and using English

Started taking English lessons outside of school from grade school Limited interactions with English-speakers Liked English itself, but disliked learning English in the school context. Used NHK materials. Found them to be useful Akogare for her aunt. Her aunt was her model

Relationship and orientation to English English is merely another school subject at junior high school/high school Pedagogical practices such as group discussions encourage Megumi to take an active part in her learning Once in college this changes. Gets used to (naretekita) English At college, English begins to permeate her everyday life. Develops affinity towards English. Begins to see herself as an English-user. This prompts her to study outside of school, such as using movies or pop music. Has linguistic gains, increases pragmatic knowledge, and she develops a sense of belonging and alignment to an imagined L2 community of English-users

English was a school subject without much utility The English-medium environment at college enables Yui to perceive English as means for communication Starts to frame English differently. English becomes fustu. In other words, she got used to (naretekita) English Her experiences in New Zealand also contribute in developing her English using self

Views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future Lacks clear visions of herself as an EnglishEncouraged by the new learning user. But by reframing English, she is able environment at college, Megumi is to reposition herself towards her own able to see herself as using English. language learning. Had difficulty conceiving of herself as Envisions herself by modelling herself on her using English, but presently has vivid aunt, who is proficient English-user visions of herself as an English-user in an international community

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Chapter Summary The narratives of Megumi and Yui illustrate how the present learning environment can interact with the past to construct and co-construct one’s vision of a future self. They demonstrate how learners capitalise on their past learning experiences and create visions of their possible selves. This illustrates the transformative nature of future selves and how learners’ emotional states intertwine in the formation of one’s self. Table 6.1 highlights Megumi’s and Yui’s stories in terms of the three enquiries guiding the research, namely, learners’ past language learning experiences, their orientations to English and their visions of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future. In the previous chapter, we saw that the prerequisite for the Ideal L2 self is the existence of a desired self. The focus of this chapter was to observe how learners can formulate their ideal selves in the absence of a clear future self. We observed that a future possible self can stem from a learner’s past ex­perience with the language, by following ‘models’ that they have en­ countered in the past. For instance, in Megumi’s and Yui’s cases, peer groups appeared to act a major reference point, but they were also influenced by other role-models. In Megumi’s case, role-models were derived from characters that she saw in the movies or television shows, whereas for Yui it was her aunt. However, these future images need to be realistic, as one will generally not invest energy if the goal is unattainable. To this end, the participants’ new learning environment and their interactions authenticated, as well as sustained, their desired future states. We have also observed how emotions were implicated in the process, and have observed how self-perception has on an impact on how one responds to the environment. How people perceive themselves emotionally in relation to their social environment has a great impact on how flexibly they can respond to the possibilities of their environment. Emotions are not only reactions but can be mediators as well.

Notes (1) The term ‘backpack teachers’ is used here in a general sense to mean language teachers who have not received any education or formal training to teach their native language. (2) The term ‘pop culture’ refers to ‘culture that is widely favored or well liked by many people’ (Story, 1998: 7). It includes movies, television programmes, music, novels, magazines or manga. In this study, it is used to refer to the first three in particular.

7 Hinako’s and Takehiro’s Stories: Ambivalent Desire to Create L2 Possible Selves

In this chapter, I will present accounts of the learning experiences of my two final participants, Hinako and Takehiro, in order to bring to the surface the main factors that appear to hinder learners’ capacity to generate and create an Ideal L2 self. In contrast to the previous four participants, their stories furnish an interesting perpective on the links that appear to exist between identity, the Ideal L2 self and emotions. From the outset, it was apparent that both Hinako and Takehiro lacked visions of themselves as English-users. In fact, they appeared to be indifferent to cultivating an identity as Englishusers. The ‘possible selves’ theory presumes the existence of an Ideal L2 self and it also posits that people differ in how easily they can form visions of their future selves (Markus & Nurius, 1986). Hinako and Takehiro’s narratives inform us that the emergence of a successful possible self was not an easy task for either of them. What is remarkable about Hinako’s and Takehiro’s narratives is how the English-medium institution did not necessarily serve as a catalyst in forming ideal images of their future English-speaking selves. By contrasting Hinako’s and Takehiro’s learning trajectories with those of the previous four participants (Chapters 5 and 6), this chapter will underscore the importance of contextual influences on the emergence, formation and development of possible selves. It will also show how learners react differently to the same affordances offered to them, and how emotions affect the process of forming (or not) learners’ L2 selves.

Learners’ Past English-Learning Experiences Hinako’s stories Our fifth participant, Hinako, was born in Sendai, one of the largest cities in northern Japan. In her first interview, Hinako described herself as 128

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an avid reader. She not only read literature in Japanese but by the time she was in high school she had also made several attempts to read literary works in English. Thus, it was not surprising to find out that Hinako’s languagelearning experience started out with reading picture books in English. Excerpt 7.1: Hinako I have always loved reading books. There were a lot of books in my house, including picture books in English. I couldn’t read English then, but I could pretty much guess the story by looking at the pictures. Sometimes, I already knew the story line since I had read it in Japanese. I also loved to sing songs in English. By the time she enrolled in high school, Hinako was reading graded readers in English, which she purchased through as used books on the internet. One day, by coincidence, she found an attractive extensive reading programme on the web. Although Hinako found reading in English to be challenging, exposure to different ways of thinking stimulated her curiosity. Rather than reading for language input, Hinako read for knowledge. In fact, information on the web was a major resource for her English learning. Excerpt 7.2: Hinako It was interesting to find out that there are different ways of thinking, depending on the culture. You know, it’s the same English, but British people are different from the Americans, and so are the Australians. It was fun to know that there are various ways of thinking. Hinako had had virtually no access to learning resources outside of the school context, unlike the other participants in this study. For instance, she did not attend English classes outside of the formal setting of the language classrooms at her school. Nor was she involved in any languagerelated club activities during her entire primary or secondary education. The only contact she had had with foreigners was the occasional exchange of idiomatic phrases with native English-speaking teachers (ALTs – see Chapter 1) who came to visit her school once a week. Hinako had never been abroad, not even for family holidays, although her family came from a middle-class background. Hinako was not only immensely fond of reading but also had a great interest in music. In particular, Hinako noted that music, and her father’s love of music, played a pivotal role in developing her initial interest in English. She would often listen to her father play English songs, which, in retrospect, helped her to become familiar with English sounds. For instance, she recalled asking her father for help to read any English words printed on the jacket of a CD or an LP record. Even when she did not understand the meaning of the song lyrics, the English sounds appealed to her.

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Excerpt 7.3: Hinako I loved books, so I would often go to the local public library. There were also many books (in both languages, English and Japanese) in my house, not to mention a huge collection of CDs of foreign artists. I used to ask my father a lot of questions about these books and CDs. What he told me was so interesting. English had beautiful sounds. Hinako received her primary and secondary education at local public schools in her area. She described her language learning experience at these schools as ‘uneventful’. She was not especially interested in English, but perhaps because of her exposure to English sounds at home (through her father’s collection of English pop songs), she was good at picking up English sounds and could articulate them better than her classmates. When Hinako was chosen to represent her school to compete at a local recitation contest, she felt that her experiences at home with English sounds gave her an advantage over her peers. In order to practise reciting for this contest, her teacher gave her a CD with spoken passages from her English textbook. Although she felt quite pleased with herself about having been asked to represent the school, she did not find the task of practising with a CD especially exciting. Nevertheless, this was the only favourable memory of her English studies at junior high school. As with many other participants in this study, at this point of her education English was solely a school subject. Hinako never considered herself good at English but, in terms of her grades, she was always among the top 10 in her year. Excerpt 7.4: Hinako It wasn’t difficult to get good grades in English because it was sort of like a review quiz of drills and exercises we had covered in class. If you were attentive in class, then you could manage it quite well. Also, I think my father had sort helped me develop a positive image of English so that I, at least at junior high, didn’t find English ‘alien’ as some people did. Hinako received most of her upper secondary education through a distance programme to obtain a high school diploma. She had withdrawn from high school after her first year because of ‘psychological issues’. She was what is known as ‘hikikomori’, a recluse who avoids interacting with others. During her two years of schooling at home, she used internet resources extensively. To improve her skills, she spent many hours listening to current events on the BBC or CBS. Excerpt 7.5: Hinako I was interested in what was going around in the world and, also, I thought that it would improve my listening skills as well. But because I tried to study hard [ganbaru], I don’t think I was able to enjoy it. I

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read quite a lot in English at home. As for grammar, what I studied in junior high laid a firm foundation in English grammar, so it wasn’t that difficult to cope with the grammar part at my cram school (yobikou). The significant role television and the internet can play in learners’ language learning is often cited in the literature (e.g. Murray, 2008a, 2008b; Murphey et al., 2005). In addition to increasing knowledge of the language, studies such as Murray’s (2011) demonstrate how such resources provide learners with information that helps them to visualise the imagined communities in which they might participate in the future. For some learners, the materials provide the content that supports their imagination, which could in turn contribute to the development of clearer images of their imagined communities to which they aspire, or to their potential L2 selves. However, for Hinako, while these resources enabled her to gain knowledge of the language, they did not necessarily help her to visualise an Englishusing self. In Excerpt 7.5, we see how Hinako demonstrates a strong sense of obligation to study hard for entrance exams. In terms of the ‘possible selves’ theory, this suggests that Hinako’s ought-to self appears to be more dominant than her potential future English-using self. Why is there such a difference in the emergence of an Ideal L2 self? I will address this question later in the chapter, in conjunction with Takehiro’s story. The researcher also noticed Hinako’s frequent use of words such as ‘phonics’ and ‘extensive reading’ in the interviews, and asked her why she was familiar with these terms. She responded that her Japanese English teacher at junior high was keen on teaching phonics; ‘extensive reading’ was a term she picked up from websites where she could borrow or purchase graded readers. As she pointed out: Excerpt 7.6: Hinako’s journal entry, June 2008 I don’t think I was interested in English, but I wanted to read novels. Language wasn’t much of an issue. Whether it was in English or in Japanese, I read what seemed interesting to me. Hinako explained that although she had no special ‘affinity’ for English throughout the years she studied English at school, she experienced changes in her attitude towards English when she attended a yobikou (a cram school for college entrance exams). Her English teacher at the yobikou praised her listening skills and reading comprehension skills. This was a definitive moment for her. Hinako recalled that, all of a sudden, she felt that she could develop a positive relationship with the language, which motivated her to study English. After a couple of months, English became one of her strongest subjects at the yobikou. Her English scores were ranked in the top 10. Positive feedback and encouragement certainly motivated Hinako to study, if not learn. This may be a good example of how learners’ relationships with

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teachers influence performance. Teachers can help to create an affinity with the language, which can, in turn, contribute to the generation of an image of a possible future self. Excerpt 7.7: Hinako I was so happy when my teacher praised my English. It gave me a boost to try harder. Eventually, I was able to rank in the top 10 at my yobikou. In summary, we have observed how Hinako’s learning experience was in sharp contrast to the experiences of our previous participants. Unlike Sayaka, Maki, Megumi and Yui, Hinako did not have as many opportunities to learn English. She did not attend any language classes in her infancy, nor outside formal schooling, and she had virtually no experience of interacting with people in English, at home or at school. Hinako’s only contact with English was by listening to songs in English or via the internet.

Takehiro’s stories Takehiro is from Nagoya, one of the major cities in the Kansai area. He has a younger brother His mother taught piano to children in the neighbourhood. Mainly due to his mother’s influence, Takehiro grew up listening to classical music. He suspects that his strong attraction to music, and his fondness for playing the flute, are rooted in his home environment. Excerpt 7.8: Takehiro Classical music was all around the house. There was not a day without it. We all loved music, especially classical numbers like Mozart and Chopin. I started learning to play the flute when I was in the sixth grade. Ever since, ‘flute’ has been at the centre of my life. His first encounter with English was at grade school. A native Englishspeaker (ALT) would visit the school once a week. Takehiro learned a few formulaic expressions and some basic vocabulary, and to sing a few songs. Formal English learning began when Takehiro attended a local public junior high school. As with all state schools, it followed the national curriculum, with a fixed syllabus and a government-approved textbook. In such a context, English was merely another school subject for Takehiro. In Excerpt 7.9, we can observe his attitude to English. Excerpt 7.9: Takehiro I play the flute and the scores are mainly in English. So, I felt that it would be convenient if I were able to read English. I was not interested in being able to speak English fluently; but I wanted to be able to ‘use’ it.

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In contrast to the families described in Chapters 5 and 6, neither Takehiro nor his parents were particularly interested in English education. Thus, he did not take any language lessons outside school. His exposure to English was limited to interactions with the ALTs in the English classrooms at grade school and lower secondary school. The first time he recognised that English was ‘a language that people used’ was when the family went on holiday to Hawaii and Australia, when Takehiro was in the seventh grade. Excerpt 7.10:Takehiro Our family trips to Hawaii and Australia during the spring and summer breaks made me realise that English was a language that people used to communicate with. But there was always a Japanese tour guide accompanying us, so it didn’t feel we were using English on these trips. When Takehiro was in the eighth grade, he applied for a four-week studyabroad programme to Sussex in the UK that the city council had organised. He recalls that although he did not have any particular interest in English, the thought of going abroad attracted him. Excerpt 7.11: Takehiro I casually applied for it without giving it much thought. Going to Britain suddenly appeared very appealing. Perhaps it was because, at around that time, the Harry Potter was the in thing. I loved reading. In fact, Takehiro read extensively from a variety of genres, including philosophical books in Japanese, Japanese literature, theology of music and religion. His stay in Sussex prompted him to read the Harry Potter series in English. For the first time, he realised the significance of reading texts in their original language. Extract 7.12: Takehiro Somehow I always did well in English at school. It was my best subject. This was strange because I don’t recall studying it, but I guess it is because I loved to read books. Reading was always my strongest weapon. I might not know the exact meanings of the words, but I could guess it from the context. The summer in Sussex, I started to read Harry Potter in English. It was a different from reading the translated version. I guess, it is important to read books in their original language. Once in high school, English was geared completely towards college entrance exams. But since he was very fond of reading, tackling long and difficult texts was not a problem (by the time he was in 11th grade, he was reading the works of Descartes and Socrates in Japanese). Outside the classroom, his interest in playing the flute was also an incentive to read in

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English. He would often access the web for information about the world’s renowned flautists. Excerpt 7.13: Takehiro I wanted to find out about artists I respected. So, I had to be able to read and understand English. This really pushed me to study English. Like Hinako, he regarded English as a tool with which to obtain and expand his knowledge and information about the world. Furthermore, Takehiro also realised from his short trips abroad that English is a medium of communication (rather than a school subject). However, in the interview excerpts and from the overall tone of his statements in the interviews, there emerged a strong sense of obligation to learn English. Excerpt 7.14 (T=Takehiro, R= researcher) T: I felt I needed to study English since it was a requirement at school, but also because I needed it to understand what was written on the blogs of my favourite musicians. I guess in a way I was using English, but I didn’t feel like an English-user. R: What do you mean by an ‘English-user’? T: I think you really feel that you are using English when you use it to communicate with people in real time: that means ‘speaking’ in English or interacting with each other in English. Reading from blogs or reading things on the web is one-way. You are a recipient of information. And, I know, I am not good at speaking in English. Obviously, it was difficult for Takehiro to visualise himself as an Englishuser. The ought-to self appeared to function more strongly than the Ideal L2 self in creating visions of imagined communities in which one could participate. The question is why? What are the conditions that stimulate the emergence of Ideal L2 selves?

Learners’ Relationship and Orientation to English in the Past and Present Hinako’s stories For the most part, Hinako’s contact with the English language was twofold: one was through her readings at home, and the other in a classroom setting at school or in her yobikou. Although Hinako was not using English to interact or communicate with people outside the school context, she regarded it as a tool to obtain knowledge about the world. Furthermore, her

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fondness for reading motivated her to read novels in their original language; at times, this was a challenging endeavour for her. Excerpt 7.15: Hinako I loved to read books, especially novels. At home there were many English books, mostly novels. My parents, especially my father, encouraged me to read them in their original language and not their translated versions. These books opened the door to many things for me. I learned a lot about the various different cultures around the world. Hinako’s relationship with English gradually shifted after she spent a couple of months in the English-medium university. For the first time in her life, she found English to be closer to her everyday life. Excerpt 7.16: Hinako At the matriculation ceremony in April I was surprised to find that the welcoming speech by the President was in both Japanese and English. I realised at that point that probably English here is not a subject that we are required to study, but something we use, a tool.   On campus, I meet many non-Japanese people talking to each other in English on subjects like what to have for lunch or where to go after classes. I hear people answering their mobiles in English, joking in English and even quarrelling in English. In classes, we have to discuss in English; we listen to lectures in English, we take notes in English and write papers in English. It’s a totally different ball game for me. You find yourself almost on a different planet. It’s sort of refreshing to see English used this way. But at the same time, I was afraid about whether I would be able to survive in a place like this. Hinako said that she had got used to (nareta) her all-English environment after about a month on campus, as many participants in this study had too. Each day, she was less apprehensive and felt less stress in using English to communicate with people: ‘Now I don’t think I feel that anxiety [kyofushin] about English that I did before. I can be more relaxed about using English’. In fact, many English language learners in Japan expresses feelings of uneasiness, lack of confidence, nervousness and even fear about learning or using English. But during the first three months, there was a gradual change in her attitude towards English, and how she struggled to find a place for ‘English’ in college life. This not only is illustrated in interview transcripts, but is also confirmed in a series of excerpts from her weekly journal entries: Excerpt 7.17: Journal entry, 16 May 2008 In our academic reading class, we had a vocabulary quiz today. I’m not quite sure how I did on that. I found the traditional vocabulary quiz

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much easier – you know, you are given an English word, and you have to find its corresponding Japanese translations. That was definitely easier than what we had today. But I felt that the emphasis here was to be able to ‘use’ that word. Extract 7.18: Journal entry, 19 May 2008 Lately I find myself using a lot of gestures. Perhaps this is because I see a lot of people talking in English, using a lot of body movements. Extract 7.19: Journal entry, 23 May 2008 I think that I am able to write longer [pieces] and also able to put my thoughts together much better these days. But, I still feel that I need to practise my speaking skills. The words just don’t pop out smoothly…. Extract 7.20: Journal entry, 5 June 2008 I am trying to construct a place for English, I think. We have been talking about critical thinking a lot, but I feel that I can only think in this manner when using English. Wonder if it works with other languages…. Hinako also built up her confidence in using English by obtaining positive reinforcement from her friends. She was pleasantly surprised when her classmates compliment her on her use of English vocabulary. She pointed out that English was now at the centre of her life and was gradually penetrating all aspects of her life at college. Extract 7.21: Hinako My friends and I talk about how we use English words in our conversation. We kid ourselves that somehow these words are more natural to us than using Japanese…. Group work, including group discussions, is a central pedagogical feature in the English language programme at this institution. Hinako explained that although she preferred individual work to group work, her learning experiences in the past few months had taught her to appreciate the effectiveness of discussions and group work. Exchanging ideas was more enjoyable than she had expected. Her awareness of the value of social networking in the classroom was raised. This was a tremendous leap for her, considering the fact that she was a hikikomori. Excerpt 7.22: Hinako I felt that interacting with people was really productive. I think I was participating very well in the discussion. I learned how rewarding it was to interact with people.

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During her first few months at college, Hinako had been able to conceptualise English in a different light. She had learned that there is a difference between learning English as a school subject and learning to communicate and interact with English-users. However, observing her peers use English in the classroom, or even how the more proficient communicate in English, had not made it any easier for Hinako to generate her possible L2 self. Once again, why is it that the participants in the previous chapters were able to generate their future L2 selves? In Hinako’s case, a sense of ambivalence pervades her perception of English. Extract 7.23: Hinako I sometimes doubt that I can survive this programme. There are too many assignments to cope with. Too many of my peers are fluent English-speakers. Sometimes I really feel helpless, and don’t know what to do…. English is something at a distance for me.

Takehiro’s stories For Takehiro, English was a ‘tool’. In particular, he wanted to be able to read English so that he could gain knowledge and information about flautists he respected. Instead of using English to communicate in a meaningful discussion, he perceived English as a medium to obtain information. The teacher-fronted instructional practices at his lower and upper secondary school reinforced such a view. Like many of the participants in this study, English was a subject to be studied, devoid of any communicative function. However, the English-medium environment of this university gradually altered his views on and attitude to English. This is clearly spelled out in the following excerpt, six weeks after the start of the academic year. Excerpt 7.24: Takehiro When you listen to the weekly NP ([narrative presentation – see Chapter 4] lectures, I feel that I am using English. You need to think in English to understand the content. Also, I realise that I sometimes feel more comfortable in using English for certain words rather than the Japanese equivalent. I think this is because I am beginning to realise that there are subtle differences in nuance between English and Japanese, something that I have not been able to notice before. When you have lot of opportunities to see how the language is being used, I think you begin to appreciate the slight difference in meanings in a language. Excerpt 7.25: Takehiro I have always been opinionated, but the atmosphere here where they encourage you to speak your mind has, I think, encouraged me. But

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since I am limited in English vocabulary, I tend to be more direct: that is, I don’t know how to hedge or tone down as I would in Japanese. I found that out because of this: a lot of my classmates see me as a different person when I talk in English, and find me quite unapproachable. During his third interview, Takehiro begins to see English as medium to formulate his thinking. The following three excerpts show how his views change: Excerpt 7.26: Takehiro We aren’t studying English per se, but we are learning a lot of things through English. We listen to lectures in English, and we have to use English to talk about things in group discussions. In order to discuss things, we need to have information, and understand that information. I guess, we have to check things on our own. Excerpt 7.27: Takehiro When we read articles here, everything is difficult. But I don’t think that’s necessarily because of the language. It’s the content. In our academic reading classes, we learn how to ‘deconstruct’ (as my teacher says) these readings. So it’s not just reading: we need to understand them, and then say what we think about them. Excerpt 7.28: Takehiro When we write essays in English, we learned that, in contrast to Japanese, the conclusion has to come at the very beginning. This changes our way of thinking…. I also notice this in discussions as well. You have to say what you want to say at the beginning, and then explain. I’ve been used to it the other way around. Takehiro’s comments in these three excerpts clearly demonstrate his metacognitive knowledge about his learning. He makes a distinction between what Bereiter and Scardamalia (1987) would call knowledge-telling and knowledge-transforming. In Excerpt 7.29, he points out that listening to lectures is not only about organising information, but rather the focus is on how much one can comprehend the content. He contrasts the difference between merely reproducing information or ideas from the text (whether aurally or in writing) and the interpretative process of selecting information, deconstructing and reconstructing knowledge (Dam, 1995). Excerpt 7.29 reconfirms his development from a focus on communication as transmission of meaning to communication as a process of constructing understanding. In Excerpt 7.29, Takehiro suggests that the differences in rhetorical style could influence the way one formulates ideas. His metacognitive knowledge is also underscored:

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Excerpt 7.29: Takehiro [Referring to the ‘retreat’ for first-year students1] This was a great opportunity to meet people other than your classmates. I had an interesting conversation with one of the students from programme C. Although she was not a returnee, she was obviously proficient in the English. I was sort of bragging about how I had to take all these English skill courses, and how difficult the courses were for me. But she said that she was envious that I could take all of these courses [English skill courses are not offered to programme C students] since she had never learned how to read and write using ‘proper’ academic English. I was sort of startled when she said this, but if you come to think of it, I, too, would not know how to write a research paper in my native language unless I had been trained to do so. I felt ‘accuracy’ was really important when learning a language.   For instance, I can talk just about any topic and, compared with my other classmates, I think I am rather outspoken, but I felt I wasn’t making any efforts to check whether I am grammatically correct or not when I speak, or even write for that matter. What Takehiro understands about his learning, and his ability to articulate it, is quite impressive. Previous works on metacognition have outlined its characteristics and its relationships to language learning, but few studies have focused on how it develops or how it can be promoted. Although the exact relationship between metacognition and possible selves is yet to be explored, Murray and Cotterall (2008) suggested the concept of possible selves can play an important role. They suggest that learners’ possible selves can serve as ‘cognitive manifestations’ of their goals and aspirations. Murray’s study with Japanese college students shows how imagination mediates metacognition and the realisation of the possible self: ‘While imagination mediated the learners’ vision of an L2 self, it was their metacognitive knowledge and skills that mediated the steps they took towards their realization’ (Murray, 2011: 88). As Dörnyei contends, ‘the possible self needs to come as part of a package consisting of an imagery component and a repertoire of appropriate plans and scripts’ (Dörnyei, 2009: 37). Because Takehiro lacked any vision of an Ideal L2 self, his past and present language learning experiences (afford­ ances) were not fully maximised to generate his future possible L2 self (nor was his metacognitive knowledge that had been developed in this learning environment). The reason why an Ideal L2 self failed to emerge is the main issue discussed in this chapter.

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Learners’ View of Themselves as English-Users in the Past, Present and Future Hinako’s stories Hinako’s exposure to English was more limited than for the other participants. Up until college, contact with English was mainly through English classes. Interacting in English with native speakers was even more sporadic during secondary school (limited to interactions with the ALTs who visited her school once in several months). Unlike other participants in this study, Hinako did not receive English education prior to junior high school, whereas Sayaka, Maki, Megumi and Mai had various kinds of access to outside resources, for example attending English conversation schools. With little exposure to English, and far fewer opportunities to ‘use’ English or see how English is ‘used’, Hinako developed no strong affinity to English. However, her interest in reading motivated her to read texts in English. Upon withdrawing from high school after the first year, Hinako relied heavily on internet English language resources to study the language. As she explained, ‘since I quit school, I had to study. And, the quickest way was to search the internet for useful programmes’. On the one hand, she took the initiative to learn a language; on the other hand, her motives were instrumental, in that she studied English for the college entrance exams. There is more of a sense of obligation to study, in her case, for entrance exams. At college, Hinako’s perception of English gradually expanded due to the tremendous increase in exposure to the language. First, in class, where English is the language of instruction, students are required to interact with each other in English. Second, on campus, she observed how English was used in real situations when the international students and the returnees interacted with each other. Compared with high school, there was a wealth of opportunities to use English. Excerpt 7.30: Hinako I don’t know whether my English has improved or not but I have certainly got used [naretekita] to English, and to using English. This is a great achievement for me. Learning a language was not the only issue for me here. Since I hadn’t been able to attend school for the last three years, coming to school and doing group work was a challenge for me. In addition, Hinako mentioned that she enjoyed her discussions in English with her classmates. She stated that she was usually asked to lead the discussions in her group, and she felt that taking an active part in the discussions had helped her regain confidence.

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Excerpt 7.31: Hinako This might sound strange, but I feel it is a lot easier doing group work and holding discussions in English than in Japanese. When I use Japanese, since I have more control over the language, I find that the discussion starts to deviate a lot. But if we are asked to discuss something in English, the goals of what we should be discussing are made very clear to us. So, that’s why I feel it’s easier to hold a discussion in English than in Japanese. It’s not the matter of language: what counts most is what you discuss. Although Hinako had been able to develop a more positive attitude towards her English-using self, her visions of herself as a future English-user were ambivalent. Also, Hinako’s affect state appeared have stabilised. On a number of occasions, we witness her concerns about studying English: Excerpt 7.32: Hinako Everyone seems to be confident of themselves. Not only about their English, but with college life in general. But for me, at the beginning, just being able to come to school was an issue. Now that I have got used to that idea, I now think about my language competency. At my yobikou, I was at the top, but now that I am here, everyone seems so way ahead of me. I try to catch up with them, but at times I just feel so hopeless. Excerpt 7.33: Hinako Although my classmates compliment me on my taking the lead in group discussions, I feel that I am not performing as well as I should. They encourage me sometimes but this makes me nervous instead, because I think that I am expected to do well in the following class. This is a burden for me…. Hinako had more of a fear or hesitation in learning English than a vision of becoming a successful English-speaking self. This lack of confidence contributed to her failure to construct a clear vision of her future L2 self. Excerpt 7.34: Hinako I don’t know what I want to do in the future. I know I should, but …. I’m not quite sure what to do if it doesn’t work out…. And I don’t know if English is going to be a part of that. I definitely feel that English is closer and more relevant to my life than before, and it is certainly not merely a school subject any longer, but I don’t know how much English is going to be a part of my life in the future.

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Takehiro’s stories Takehiro’s past language learning experience probably represents the vast majority of Japanese learners of English, with the language pre­ dominantly regarded as a school subject, and few opportunities for its use even in class, let alone outside of the classroom. Like Hinako, but unlike the other four participants in this study, Takehiro did not receive any specific early education in English. However, he recognised that English is a medium for communication, as a result of family trips abroad and a two-week studyabroad programme in Sussex. Nevertheless, his ‘intercultural experiences’ were not sufficient to act on the affordances that the multicultural environment of the university had to offer to increase his awareness as a language user. Drawing on Gibson (1977, 1979), affordances are ‘the perceived opportunities for action provided for the observer by the environment’: that is, ‘affordances can be understood as the possibilities that an object or en­ vironment appears to offer (or not) for action or functioning’ (Singleton & Aronin, 2007: 84). Moreover, as Heft observes, affordances can be perceived quite differently by each individual: An affordance is the perceived functional significance of an object, event, or place for an individual. For example, a firm, obstacle-free ground surface is perceivable as a surface on which one can walk. In contrast, a boggy surface or a surface cluttered with obstacles (e.g. a boulder field) is typically perceived as impeding walk…. [T]he perceived functional character of an environmental feature establishes possibilities and sets limits on actions. (Heft, 2001: 123) As Singleton and Aronin (2007) suggest, it is important for learners to possess the capacity to perceive and recognise the array of possibilities presented to them. Learners also need to be able to exploit and capitalise on their perceived opportunities. Singleton and Aronin also claim that how learners perceive, recognise and respond to the range of affordances available to them depends on the experiential profile of the learners, in our case, learners’ past learning experiences. Thus, Takehiro appears to have lacked sufficient language awareness based on past experiences to make full use of his opportunities. From an affective perspective, Takehiro’s stories are interesting: although he recognises his limited proficiency in the language, he does not express any concerns or anxiety in the manner expressed by other participants in this study, such as Hinako. From time to time, Hinako expressed her apprehension about learning and using English, but Takehiro did not convey any hesitancy about using or learning English. In fact, he was very confident. He said he knew he was not good at speaking English, and lacked

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accuracy, but he added that ‘I think the main point is to get your message across’. He added that English as a school subject had always been one he excelled in (implying that his grades were always good). He also mentioned that although he realised he lacked oral proficiency, he nevertheless often found himself leading group discussions in class. He considered himself to be the active type, ready to say what he thinks, and greater opportunities for discussion at college had made him more vocal. For Takehiro, proficiency in English was not the issue. Excerpt 7.35: Takehiro I know my oral English is not as good as some people in my class, but somehow, I often end up leading the discussions or volunteering to take the lead. I have not been the silent type. Even at high school I expressed my opinions, although what I had to say may be the opposite of what others had said. It’s my style, I guess. Class discussions here have certainly encouraged me to speak my mind openly. Although this university is well known for its English language programme, Takehiro emphasised that he was not there for that reason. As he explained: Excerpt 7.36: Takehiro I’m interested in music. I especially like playing the flute. I am also interested in philosophy. This is one of the few colleges in Japan (as far I know) that offers courses in music theory. So, I didn’t come here to study English, as many around me presumed I did. What struck me here is Takehiro’s confidence. He showed no signs of hesitation or concerns in using English. Perhaps this can be explained by his strong identity as a musician and a flautist, while his identity as an English learner appears to be on the periphery. Recall that his perception of English was more as a tool to gain access to the world of music. As Norton (2000) claims, from an array of possible multiple identities that is usually available, one tends to identify most with the identity one values at that particular time of one’s life. In terms of the ‘possible self ’ theory, this can be explained by the fact that one’s desired future self needs to be linked with ‘plausible strategies, made to feel like true selves’, and it has to be congruent with the identity one values at that particular time of one’s life (Oyserman et al., 2006). Takehiro’s identity as a musician and a flautist was perhaps more vivid, realistic and more plausible than his identity as a language learner. However, this does not imply that his perception of himself as an English-user did not change. In fact, we can observe that it did shift, but it was not enough to generate clear visions of himself as an English-user. In fact, the linguistic gains he thought he had made in the past few months

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appear to have made him more comfortable with the language. For instance, he commented that he was now able to understand the subtle nuances of many English words. He noticed this especially when he went out for a drink with his high school friends who attended other universities. Excerpt 7.37: Takehiro Last weekend, I went out for a drink with my former classmates from high school. I hadn’t seen them since graduation. We talked about our classes and, you know, the usual stuff about studying. But then I realised that I was mixing a lot of English words. At one time, one of my friends asked me what ‘comprehension’ means. I was dumbstruck. ‘Comprehension’ is comprehension! I soon realised that English words seem to just pop out of my mouth. I guess, I am immersed in English more than I am aware of. I asked Takehiro if this was because he had got used to (nareru) the multi­ cultural environment and the all-English classes at college. His response surprised me: he did not think nareru was the appropriate term, since ‘to me nareru implies that things are going smoothly’, whereas in his case ‘I don’t think it is. There are too many things I need to study.’ Takehiro’s case serves to reinforce the developmental and transformative nature of the Ideal L2 self. If Takehiro were interviewed again at his graduation, or even years later, perhaps we would see that he had been able to generate a vision of his desired L2 self. In the final interview, I asked Takehiro an open-ended question about the future he envisioned for himself. Excerpt 7.39: Takehiro Well, actually, I’m not sure what I will be doing in the future or even in the next few years. I know for certain I will be studying or doing something related to music but, apart from that, not really sure. I know English is useful, so I guess it’s going to become quite a major part of my college life … whether I like it or not.

Chapter Summary The stories of Hinako and Takehiro illustrate the difficulties involved in creating an Ideal L2 self. They also show how past experiences interact with the current self to produce a future self, and how emotions are involved in the process. Dörnyei’s model presumes the existence of a future desired L2 self. However, this study examines this assumption in more detail by exploring the effects of learning contexts on a learner’s inclination to invest in an Ideal L2 self. In addition, referring to Gibson’s (1979) concept of affordances, this

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chapter shows how the third component of Dörnyei’s L2 Motivational Self System, the L2 learning experience, influences the construction of the self. This is especially relevant when we incorporate the link affordance makes to identity. As Cotterall and Murray observe: A crucial feature of this definition [Gibson’s definition of affordance] is the link it makes to identity. Different people will see different opportunities for action and view them in different ways. (Cotterall & Murray, 2009: 42) In Table 7.1, I present a summary of the Hinako’s and Takehiro’s English language learning trajectories in terms of their past language learning ex­ periences, their orientations to English and their views of themselves as English learners in the past, present and future. A common thread that runs through both Hinako’s and Takehiro’s stories is their limited association with English as well as their limited interactions with users of English. This is a marked distinction in their

Table 7.1  A summary of Hinako’s and Takehiro’s stories Hinako

Takehiro

Past language learning experiences Starts learning English in fifth grade as a At home, listened to English songs or part of Integrated Studies (see Chapter 1) flipped through English picture books at the elementary level First substantial encounter with English at Limited overseas experiences. Family the local public junior high school trips to Hawaii and Australia. But he Spent the last two years of high school does realise that English is a medium for studying through a distance programme communication (hikikomori) Has no contact with English-speakers Virtually no contact with foreigners except for the ALTs except for brief once-a-week formal conversations with ALTs Relationship and orientation to English English was a school subject. Has no special affinity towards English nor learning English. Expresses less confidence in using and learning the language.

English was mainly a school subject. Does not consider himself a proficient English-speaker, but has confidence in himself.

Views of themselves as English-users in the past, present and future In this English-medium university, English Raises awareness of himself as an Englishis closer to her than before user

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learning experience. It is true that Hinako had a certain amount of exposure to English, for instance listening to English songs early in her childhood and reading picture books. However, there appears to have been almost no inter­ actions in English (via email or in day-to-day life), nor the opportunities to observe how English is used in real life. In Takehiro’s case, although he had very limited exposure to the English language, holiday trips abroad and his short study-abroad programme at junior high school had helped him to perceive English as a means for communication. However, for both Hinako and Takehiro their experiences were not enough to generate clear images of a desired future L2 self. Their stories suggest the potential importance of contextual resources, especially immediate family context in shaping or generat­ ing possible selves. Early parental encouragement, available models of successful learners or supplementary learning on private courses (especially during their earlier years) appear to be instrumental in learners imagining themselves as future users of English. The intensity and frequency of exposure and interactions in the target language also contribute to the development of learners and their emergent identities as English-users. In addition, if learners have visions of themselves in areas other than language learning, then these images may take precedence (as in the case of Takehiro). In other words, people differ in how they form visions of their L2 selves. We must not ignore the emotional dispositions of our participants. A lack of confidence permeates Hinako’s story. She mentioned that the multicultural university environment had helped her get used to (nareru) English, and using English with her proficient peers had reduced her anxiety about interacting in English. Takehiro, on the other hand, was always quite confident. He was not necessarily confident about his English or the way he communicated in English with his peers but he did derive confidence from his strong identity as a musician (as a flutist), which might have allowed him to act more autonomously and proactively in his English learning.

Note (1) ‘Retreats’ are breaks for first-year students that are organised in May every year.

8 An Attempt to Weave the Threads Together

This research explores identity formation among language learners in an EFL context by focusing on the psychologically oriented dimension of identity construction. This is in contrast to the current dominant poststructuralist understanding, where there is more focus on the socially constructed nature of identity. I problematise the present approach that centres on the social dimension of identity in applied linguistics (Norton, 2013) and call for a more balanced approach to the subject. Grounded in a social constructivist and poststructuralist approach, this research has explored identity in relation to the learning of English in a foreign language context with Japanese university students studying English in Japan. Drawing on the theory of possible selves (Markus & Nurius, 1986) in addition to the theories of situated learning (Lave & Wenger, 1991) and imagined communities (Anderson, 1991; Norton, 2000), the study proposes ways to close the gap between the social and the psychological dimensions of identity construction, focusing specifically on emotions and experience. In particular, Dörnyei’s (2009) notion of the Ideal L2 self is employed to examine how learners in this context construct their identity in the present, by imagining their future selves participating in communities of English-users, and how emotions are involved in the process. Data was collected by following the language learning experiences of six participants during the first year of their two-year intensive programme of English for academic purposes at a liberal arts college in Tokyo. A narrative approach was taken to the data collection and analysis. The stories of the six participants were collected mainly through semi-structured interviews, complemented by other sources of data, such as journals and emails. In this chapter, I attempt to weave together the main findings. However, with the study being exploratory in nature, the aim is not so much to arrive at definitive conclusions but rather to identify what the issues are, to discuss the significance of what emerged in the research and to point to future directions for further studies on the subject. 147

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The first part of this chapter will discuss how the narratives of the six participants indicate three distinct patterns of learners’ construction (or minimum development) of their Ideal L2 selves, and highlight the importance of emotions in the process of identity construction. The findings also illustrate the transformative and developmental nature of the Ideal L2 self, wherein positive and negative emotions affect learners’ response to, and ability to negotiate, their social environment. The chapter concludes by suggesting two prototype models, termed profiles A and B.

Linking the Stories of the Six Participants: What Their Narratives Tell Us First I return to the three core research questions that provided the initial impetus for this study (Box 1.1) to frame a brief description and discussion of what was learned. The length of discussion for each of the three questions varies somewhat, but this is because the arguments build on one another.

Learners’ past English-learning experiences The focal questions pertaining to learners’ past English language learning experiences were the following: (1) What are their English language learning experiences? (2) What kind of affective relationship have learners formed in the process of their learning? (3) How do learners make sense of these experiences in descriptive and evaluative terms? (4) How does this affect their identities as learners? Exploring learners’ past language learning experiences provides insights for the present as well as the future. Learners come to our classrooms with unique individual language learning histories (LLH).1 LLHs give voice to learners as they talk about their learning experiences by revealing their memories and emotions, and by presenting their own explanations of how they have learned their second or foreign language. The growing research interest in first-person accounts has provided many benefits in language learning research: one example is the potential these reports have for providing insights into certain aspects of language acquisition (in particular, the emotional stance of the learner’s learning trajectory) which are not easily obtained using other research tools. It is a challenge for researchers, since we can neither directly examine what happens in the learners’ mind nor observe every detail of their entire learning experience. These reports are usually collected in the form of oral or written texts, but some recent

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works incorporate multimedia LLHs (e.g. Menezes, 2008), which refers to the kind of ‘knowledge that emerges from the interaction among text, hypertext, images and sounds’ (Menezes, 2008: 199). In whatever medium learners’ LLHs are compiled, they document what learners actually say and feel about their learning experiences from past to present, both their failures and successes, and their emotions in their learning. These histories include the students’ own affective and attitudinal ‘baggage’ and what they bring to their learning environment, what Gorham and Millette (1997) describe as the ‘antecedent condition of the learner’ (ACL). It is a conglomeration of psychological variables that includes goal orientation, expectations of success, attitudes and values in relation to the subject, and self concept (Carpenter et al., 2008). The relevance this notion has for this research concerns how learners’ ‘baggage’ or ACL can be socially mediated (Fukuda et al., 2011). First, it is mediated by new perspectives; that is, learners can re-conceive past experiences (for example, Megumi’s reconceptualisation of herself as a successful language learner, in Chapter 6). The meanings we read into past experiences may change because the present guides our interpretation. Our past is constantly open to reflection. Through current interactions in the classroom, for example, learners can reframe past experiences and their emotional baggage, and find their potential abilities with English in the future. Moreover, incorporating current perspectives can illuminate and sometimes change the past when we listen to others’ experiences. That is, when we respond to stories of others with memoirs of our own, together these stories can open up possibilities for our future (Conle, 2006; Dewey, 1938). Second, ACL immediately grows from present experiences. What learners do in the present, how they are experiencing it and how they interpret those experiences in their present soon become their past. In short, what is happening now creates future ACLs. The past follows an individual into the present and can, at times, contribute to the future. Progress and development are usually future oriented but, as Wenger (1998) claims, the past also has a role to play in the present and the future. Thus, examining learners’ stories of their past language learning experiences is a powerful tool, with the potential to shed light on the learners’ present and future learning. While the learning trajectory of each of the six participants was unique, three distinct patterns emerged in the way their past experiences interacted with their current learning environment to form their guides to their future self. Figures 8.1 to 8.6 highlight the significance of how past language learning experiences factors in with the present learning environment to authenticate, reinforce or generate images of the learners’ future selves. The language learning experiences the participants have had can positively or negatively influence their possible selves. The formation of these guides to their future selves is illustrated in Figures 8.1 to 8.6. Pattern 1–3 respectively designate the participants’ learning trajectories in terms of their possible

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L2 selves. They symbolise the discursive space where an individual moves towards his or her ideal self. Moreover, this space relates to the third component of Dörnyei’s L2 Motivational Self System, the L2 learning experience. Recall that the L2 learning experience is concerned with the actual immediate learning process, such as the learners’ learning histories, language-related enjoyment and personal satisfaction. It presumes that a learner’s initial desire to learn a language comes not from an internally or externally generated self (Dörnyei, 2009) but from engagement (both positive and negative) with the learning process.

Sayaka and Maki Pattern 1 (Figures 8.1 and 8.2) exemplifies Sayaka and Maki’s stories in terms of their Ideal L2 selves. In Chapter 5, we observed how both Sayaka and

Past Past learning experiences Ideal L2 self created by influences from past learning experiences that include the immediate learning environment, such as: • home (parents, lodger from the US, other material resources) • schooling (attended a private elementary, junior high and a high school with strong English language programmes) • outside of school (language schools) • overseas experience (short study-abroad programme in Singapore)

Ideal L2 self L2 user in an imagined international community of L2 users

Vision of Ideal L2 self created by: • resources at home • educational resources • positive attitude to L2 and its users

Future

Current learning experiences Ideal L2 self strengthened, authenticated and sustained by influences from the immediate learning environment: • English-medium college environment that consists of an intensive programme in English for academic purposes (EAP) • Study English Abroad (SEA) programme • bilingual atmosphere at college

Present

Figure 8.1  Pattern 1. Sayaka’s language learning trajectory

Vision of L2 users strengthened and authenticated by: • observing and interacting with proficient English learners on campus • a cooperative learning environment in the EAP classes • images of Ideal L2 self promoted by her experiences on her study-abroad programme (experiences of negotiating her identities)

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Maki had clear visions of becoming active participants in an inter­national community of English-speakers prior to entering college. Their visions for the future were created largely by their contextual resources, particularly the immediate family and their educational background, or what Irie and Brewster (2014) coin ‘experiential capital’: ‘integration of salient life events into possible selves can contribute to the articulation of images…. These experiences, from our childhood to more immediate domain specific memories, are what we propose to call experiential capital. (Irie & Brewster, 2014: 174) However, for the future self to serve as an impetus for learning, it is necessary for individuals to strengthen and develop the visions of their Ideal L2 selves. Past Past learning experiences Ideal L2 self created mainly by influences from the immediate language learning experiences such as: • resources at home – her mother as the role-model, various cultural resources, and foreign friends of the family • schooling – public elementary/private high school • outside of school – attended language classes outside of school during elementary and junior high school • overseas experience (attended pre-school at an international school in Bangladesh) • high school education (spent three years in the school’s dormitory communicating with returnees)

Ideal L2 self L2 user in an imagined international community of L2 users

Vision of Ideal L2 self created by: • resources at home: her mother as the role-model • educational resources • positive attitude towards L2 and its users

Future

Current learning experiences Ideal L2 self strengthened, authenticated and sustained by influences from the immediate learning environment: • English-medium college environment that consists of an intensive programme in English for academic purposes (EAP) • returnees (regards them as her role-models) • a cooperative learning environment in the EAP classes

Present

Figure 8.2  Pattern 1. Maki’s language learning trajectory

Vision of L2 users strengthened and authenticated by: • the English-medium tertiary institution with its various material resources including interactions with proficient English-learners on campus • akogare towards (desire for) the returnees who are her near peer role-models • a cooperative learning environment in the EAP classes

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Furthermore, visions of their successful L2 selves need to be recognised as realistic and attainable in order to activate the desired self and to make learning possible. The English-medium tertiary institution contributed to sharpening the visions of Sayaka’s and Maki’s Ideal L2 selves, but the afford­ ances and resources provided to substantiate or ‘personalise’ their possible selves were quite different. The bilingual and bicultural learning environment at college strengthened Sayaka’s vision of her Ideal L2 self. Nevertheless, on several occasions she developed ambivalent feelings towards her language learning in her new surroundings. Propelled by her ‘drive’ to realise her future self as a competent L2 user, she reframed her current self, and envisioned her future successful English-using self. For instance, at the beginning of the academic year, she was discouraged by the fact that many of her peers were more proficient than she was. She felt uneasy because she perceived herself to lack the linguistic knowledge necessary to function as a prominent member of this community. To cope with this conflict, she employed a strategy that she called ‘just keep on talking’ (Excerpt 5.18). Sayaka also responded pro­ actively when her possible L2 self was challenged during her participation in the six-week summer study-abroad programme. It is noteworthy how she managed to reframe such a ‘critical event’ (Benson, 2011). Recall how she successfully negotiated her identity (or position) with her Columbian peers and her teacher. She displayed her ability to turn linguistic constraints into a facilitative learning environment by revealing her agency: that is, Sayaka became more agentive towards her learning and took more initiatives. As Boyatiz and Akrivou argue, ‘the ideal self ’ once activated: promotes the development of a person’s learning agenda and then a more articulated learning plan, experimentation and practice with new behavior, feelings and perceptions. (Boyatiz & Akrivou, 2006: 28) A crucial feature of Sayaka’s experiences is their relevance to her identity and to her emotional disposition. In order to negotiate her position in class with her Columbian peers, Sayka relied on her identity as ‘Japanese’. Using her personal knowledge of the Japanese culture, she opened and maintained a conversation with her peers during breaks and after classes. The rapport that she built with her peers enabled her to create a favourable position in the classroom. In addition, Sayaka sent her teacher emails which communicated an interest in and knowledge of intercultural matters, an area in which the teacher holds expertise. By creating common ground with the teacher, Sayaka sought to reconstruct the images of her diminished self. Thus, her story is a forceful illustration of the interdependence of emotions and identity in the formation of the L2 ideal self. Not only do positive emotions impel learners to take action, but also negative emotions, such as frustration, can become psychological resources for identity

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development. Sayaka’s story shows how both positive and negative emotions shape the formation of learners’ future L2 selves. Maki’s conception of her Ideal L2 self (as a competent English-user in an international community) was also sharpened by her new environment. Maki actively engaged with her new learning environment which provided abundant social learning resources (e.g. overseas students, returnees, proficient language users, etc.). As noted earlier, for the possible selves to become effective and promote learning, individuals need to be reassured that their visions are realistic and possible to attain. Providing ‘models’ for them to emulate is an effective way to authenticate or substantiate their future possible selves (Higgins, 1998). Models might be foreign pop stars or athletes or musicians. Maki had two influential near peer role-models: her mother, a global professional involved in developmental work in Asia and Africa, and the returnees (kikokusei). Both were very influential in the co-construction of Maki’s visions of her future desired self. In particular, Maki’s strong akogare (desire) towards the returnees led her to ‘mimic’ their tastes in fashion and music. We must also remember how the few years Maki spent living abroad in her early childhood, as well as the international environment at home, had contributed in constructing favourable learning experiences that interacted with her present learning resources to co-construct her Ideal L2 self. Exposure to English from an early age and meaningful interactions in an English-using environment (at the interface of the past and present) allowed her to authenticate her future possible self.

Megumi and Yui Meanwhile, with the stories of Megumi and Yui, we witness how they generate or construct their future visions of a desired L2 self. The following two diagrams of their, Figure 8.3 and Figure 8.4, represent pattern 2 of the learning trajectory. The characteristic feature of pattern 2 is how past learning experiences build up, transform or develop and are activated to create images of a desired future self. Once again, the past serves an impetus for the present and future. Similar to Sayaka and Maki, both Megumi and Yui had received their early English education by attending classes at local English conversation schools or jukus. However, there was a tone of detachment when Megumi and Yui talked about their English learning experiences. For instance, they started to learn English at private language schools in line with the majority of their friends. The fear of being ‘left out’ by their peers appears to have threatened them. We can see that there was a strong sense of obligation to study English for both participants: they were told, especially by their parents, that English would be an effective instrumental tool in later life. Interestingly, this is a characteristic feature of the ought-to self. It represents the future identity learners should have in terms of other people’s intentions

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rather than on their own. However, at the same time, we must not overlook the fact that both Megumi and Yui did have many enjoyable experiences with their English activities during their early childhood. A major transformation of their learning experience occurred when they became immersed in life at the English-medium university. There was a shift in their outlook and attitudes towards the English language and their learning with a change in their perceptions as language learners. Through meaningful interactions with their peers and teachers in this bilingual and multicultural learning environment, Megumi and Yui start to perceive themselves as English-users. As evident from their stories in Chapter 6, these experiences encouraged the emergence and formation of their Ideal L2 selves. Having goals or purpose is not sufficient; learners need to conceive themselves as users. Furthermore, it is possible that this new learning context revived pleasurable memories of using English long ago, outside of their formal school contexts. In particular, Megumi’s developing sense of affinity

Past Past learning experiences Influences from past learning environment that contributes to generating a vision of an Ideal L2 self: • attended an English conversation school in the neighbourhood of her home from elementary school to junior high school

Vision of Ideal L2 self does not exist or is vague at this stage:  • limited experience in interaction with English-users • displays a strong sense of ought-to L2 self by attending English conversational classes since all of her friends started to study English • disposition towards English itself is not necessarily negative, but there is a sense of detachment

Present Current learning experiences Target language contributes to generating a vision of an Ideal L2 self: • English-medium college environment that consists of an intensive programme in English for academic purposes (EAP) • Study English Abroad (SEA) programme • cooperative learning environment in the EAP classes • multicultural/bilingual atmosphere of the university

Future Ideal L2 self Creates images of L2 user in an imagined community of L2 users

Vision of Ideal L2 self emerges with interaction in the present language learning environment: • the English-medium university environment contributes to forming a future image as a L2 user in an international community and explains her perception of English as something naretekita (‘to get used to’) • the changes in her view towards learning English challenged her to watch movies in English • the SEA programme strengthened and substantiated her vision of a possible L2 user in an international community of English users • cooperative learning environment from her peers in the EAP helped her gain confidence in using the L2

The vision needs to be continually strengthened and maintained

Figure 8.3  Pattern 2. Megumi’s language learning trajectory

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towards English and learning English as well as her increased perception of herself as an English-user made her more agentive in her behaviour. As we have seen in Chapter 6, this is clearly exemplified by the fact that she started to challenge herself by watching foreign movies in English. Learners’ relationships with the English language and how they conceptualise it have an impact on their learning behaviours. I will elaborate on this issue in conjunction with the second research question, but when Yui’s image of an English-using self in an imagined community of international users began to be consolidated, not only was she able to contribute more in class discussions but also she became more tolerant of her limitations. This is an example of how learners can reconceive their past experiences. By reframing her perception of herself as a learner, Yui was able to reinterpret her past learning experiences, and find potential abilities with regard to using Past Past learning experiences Influences from past learning environment that contributes to generating a vision of an Ideal L2 self: • attended a local English conversational school at the primary level • attended a private junior high/high school with a strong English language programme • in addition, started taking English lessons outside of school at a small English language school with a Japanese English teacher from middle school

Vision of Ideal L2 self does not exist or is vague at this stage:  • limited experience in interaction with foreigners • holds dual visions of English – as a school subject and as a tool for communication (dislikes the former, but emphasises that she likes English itself) • sees her aunt as a model L2 user and develops agogare towards her

Present Current learning experiences Target language contributes to generating a vision of an Ideal L2 self: • English-medium college environment that consists of an intensive programme in English for academic purposes (EAP) • participation in SEA programme • cooperative learning environment in the EAP classes • multicultural/bilingual atmosphere of the university

Future Ideal L2 self Creates images of L2 user in an imagined community of L2 users

The vision needs to be continually strengthened and maintained

Figure 8.4  Pattern 2. Yui’s language learning trajectory

Vision of Ideal L2 self emerges with interaction in the present language learning environment: • the English-medium university environment, she observes how people interact and communicate • starts to frame English as a language for communication • recognises the value of group discussions, and appreciates the cooperative learning environment with her peers

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English in the future. In other words, Megumi’s and Yui’s stories reveal how the learning environment (present) offers opportunities to facilitate the emergence of their desired self (future). Their accounts suggest the developmental and transformative nature of the future possible self that is context dependent. The Ideal L2 self is not a stable entity but has the potential to change and develop over time. Forging an ideal self is an ongoing process, in which emotions are involved.

Hinako and Takehiro At the opposite end of the spectrum, we find Hinako and Takehiro, for whom forming visions of an Ideal L2 self was not a realistic option. Contrary to Sayaka and Maki, they lacked any clear vision of a future L2 self and, more

Past Past learning experiences Limited exposure to English: • home (English picture books and listening to English songs) • starts learning English in fifth grade • has no experience learning English other than in the context of formal classroom learning • formal English learning begins at junior high school as part of the school requirement • no overseas experiences

Lacks vision of Ideal L2 self: • likes to read English picture books in order to gain cultural knowledge rather than to acquire English • limited or almost no interaction with foreigners • liked independent study rather than group work

Present Current learning experiences The English-medium college environment did not facilitate creating images of an Ideal L2 self

Future Ideal L2 self Minimum influence on generating images of a L2 user in an imagined community of L2 users

Figure 8.5  Pattern 3. Hinako’s language learning trajectory

Minimum influence on generating visions of Ideal L2 self: • the bilingual environment enabled her to see people interacting in English, but she was not able to capitalise on this experience to form her Ideal L2 self. • English is closer to her than before. • the ought-to L2 self is stronger; she feels that she has to study in order to meet the requirements • she has anxiety about using English

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importantly, the images of their desired L2 self was minimised in their new learning environment. In short, Hinako’s and Takehiro’s stories represent an example of how their L2 learning experience was unable to generate a viable vision of their L2 possible selves. Figures 8.5 and 8.6 respectively outline Hinako’s and Takehiro’s learning trajectories. They represent pattern 3 in this research. From Figures 8.5 and 8.6, we observe striking differences between Hinako’s and Takehiro’s past learning experiences and those of the other four participants. Neither Hinako nor Takehiro received early language education to the same extent as the other four participants. Although Takehiro’s family made overseas trips to Hawaii and Australia, he pointed out that it was not necessary to use any English, since the whole trip was

Past Past learning experiences Limited exposure to English: • has no experience learning English other than in the context of formal classroom learning • started learning English at fifth grade as a part of Integrated Studies at the elementary level • formal English learning begins at junior high school as part of the requirement • strong interest in music (plays the flute and piano) • some overseas experiences (participated in short studyabroad programs; family trips to Hawaii and Australia)

Lacks vision of Ideal L2 self: • his strong interest in music prompts him to use English to obtain information about his favourite artists using the internet • despite the above, he perceives English • mainly as a school subject or as merely a tool to obtain information

Present Current learning experiences The English-medium college environment did not facilitate creating images of an Ideal L2 self

Future Ideal L2 self Minimum influence on generating images of a L2 user in an imagined community of L2 users

Figure 8.6  Pattern 3. Takehiro’s language learning trajectory

Minimum influence on generating visions of Ideal L2 self: • although he recognises that English is not merely a subject but also a means for communication, he is not able to generate any visions of his Ideal L2 self • his future ambition as a musician appears to factor strongly into his future • he is very confident in himself and has a clear identity as a musician

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arranged by a travel agency and there was always a Japanese tour guide. With limited exposure to English, and fewer experiences for interactions with its users, it was difficult for him to visualise his L2-using self. Similarly, for Hinako, the only oppor­tunity to interact in English with non-Japanese nationals was a weekly English class with ALTs at school. Recall that both Hinako and Takehiro did not take any English lessons outside of the classroom, unlike the other four participants in this study. With minimal exposure to English, and fewer opportunities to see English used or to communicate in the language, they did not have sufficient past learning experiences on which to capitalise in order to build their ideal future L2 selves. The capacity to visualise a possible self depends largely on the extent to which individuals are able to associate themselves with the English-using world (Dörnyei, 2005, 2009; Ushioda, 2011). This, in turn, depends upon the learner’s past learning experiences (regardless of whether these are positive or negative) with the target language, and how learners are able to relate to the language. This brings us to the second research question, which focuses on the learners’ relationship and orientation to English, and how this contributes to the shaping of their L2 selves and their identities.

Learners’ relationship and orientation to English The focal issues here were: • How do learners see the English language (e.g. as a language for work; as a language for travel or entertainment, etc.)? • Do learners feel the target language to be ‘foreign’ to them? • Do learners see themselves as learners of the language or users or both? • What kinds of affective states do learners ascribe to the process of learning English? In Japan, the Japanese language prevails virtually in all domains of life. Forming links or ties with the English language and visualising an active English-using self in an international community, where the language used is not Japanese, does not come easily. As Hino contends, ‘although it is wrong to regard Japan as a monolingual country, it is also true that Japanese enjoys an overwhelmingly dominant status intra-nationally’ (Hino, 2009: 104). Watanabe’s recent study with Japanese high school students underscores the necessity of providing communication opportunities to reduce ‘feeling of psychological distance from the English-speaking environment’ (Watanabe, 2013: 162). Under these circumstances, the capacity to visualise an English-using self is limited. Furthermore, how learners view or conceptualise the target language has major implications for their entire language learning process (Dörnyei & Ushioda, 2009; Ushioda, 2011; Yashima, 2009). For instance, do learners see themselves as merely learners studying the

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target language as a school subject or do they regard themselves as language users interacting with English-speakers in a global community? The first and foremost factor in the formation of the possible self is to have the capacity to visualise an L2-using self. This depends on how learners are able to associate themselves with the target language, especially at the initial stages of the learning process, and also on how they conceptualise the language. In this study Sayaka and Maki had access to a variety of learning resources, both within and outside of formal schooling, including abundant contextual support (as a result of the family’s ‘middle-class’ background; early parental encouragement; available models of successful learners; links with the world through their parents, etc.), which was instrumental in their envisioning themselves as future users of English. Moreover, Chapter 5 furnished evidence that the emotional disposition towards English and learning English was generally positive for both Sayaka and Maki. This was illustrated by their strong affinity for the target language, as well as their identification as English-users functioning in global contexts, where English is perceived as a lingua franca. By contrast, Megumi and Yui’s conceptualisations of English, and hence their understandings of themselves as English-users, were quite the opposite at the outset of the academic year. It was not until their experiences in the English-medium environment at college that they were finally able to see or imagine themselves as English-users. This was in sharp contrast to their previous view of English, which was congruent with the dominant discourse of framing English as a requirement of the curriculum (Ushioda, 2006). Based on the findings of this study, there appears to be a strong correlation between learners’ conceptualisations of the language and their perceptions of themselves as either predominantly users or predominantly learners of the language. The bilingual and multicultural university setting offered ample opportunities to experience English used in a variety of ways, by people from different ethnic and cultural backgrounds. The presence of overseas students, returnees and proficient English-learners, as well as the opportunities for interaction, encouraged Megumi and Yui to view English as an international language. By broadening their perception of English to include the ‘outer circle’, they realised that the English which they strove for did not necessarily have to be that characterised by a particular Anglophone community. Conceptualising English in this manner increased the learners’ potential to develop and sharpen visions of their Ideal L2 self. Not only were they given more opportunities to use English for communication, but how they perceived these opportunities, in turn, had an impact on how successful they were in developing their possible L2 selves. Images became more realistic and more achievable, which, in turn, prompted them to act more proactively in their learning. For instance, it encouraged Yui to take a more active part in the classroom discussions with her peers. She realised that she did not need

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native-like fluency; rather, her opinions were valued. Repositioning herself in this alternative discourse in relation to English increased her participation in group discussions, which led to the refining of her nascent Ideal L2 self. Yui appears to have taken greater ownership of her desired future self, as shown in her participation in the six-week summer study-abroad programme. Thus, forging and authenticating their Ideal L2 selves, both Megumi and Yui underwent major transformations in their views of themselves as language learners in this novel and stimulating learning context. I would now like to turn to the central concern of this study: how emotions are implicated in the process of the emerging L2 possible self. How people see themselves emotionally in relation to the social environment has a great impact on their ability to respond flexibly to the possibilities of the environment (Imai, 2010; Swain et al., 2011). In other words, emotions are not merely simple reactions: as they can also be mediators that support or inhibit a learner’s participation. Both Megumi and Yui reframed themselves positively as English-users in the discourse of English as an international language in a global community, such that native-speaker fluency was not a prerequisite. Instead, they aspired to become active participants in an inter­ national community of English-speakers, which was reinforced through their experiences in the study-abroad programme. To draw an equation such as ‘positive emotions lead to successful learners’ would obviously be too simplistic. Nonetheless, the stories of my participants underscore one important feature: positive emotions embolden learners to be proactive and to respond flexibly to their social environment at a critical juncture of their language learning career. The narratives of Megumi and Yui are particularly significant in how they demonstrate the association between emotions and the constantly changing and evolving nature of the Ideal L2 self. To explain how Megumi and Yui formed an increasingly refined and confident vision of a future English-using self, we need to take into account their past learning experiences. When we contrast their stories with those of Hinako and Takehiro, we see how the latter were both unable to develop visions of their desired future selves to the extent that Megumi and Yui could. Hinako and Takehiro recognised the value of English and viewed mastery of English as a valuable goal, but they spoke of the language with indifference. For them, success in English was equated with the obligation to obtain good marks at school. Their conceptualisation of English was somewhat altered by their participation in the all-English university instructional practices, and by engagement in meaningful interactions with their peers and teachers. However, these interactions did not appear to have instigated the emergence of their future L2 selves. Of course, this does not mean that they did not have any visions for the future. Takehiro, in particular, did have his dreams (principally relating to music), but English did not appear to feature strongly in them. In Chapter 7 we observed that he valued his identity as a musician. By contrasting the cases of Megumi and Yui with

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those of Hinako and Takehiro, one speculate on the effect of contextual resources (e.g. immediate family background) in forming, developing and strengthening visions of a future L2 self. In terms of Gibson’s (1979) notion of affordances (outlined in Chapter 7), it is evident that, for participants who represent pattern 1 or 2, the college learning environment provided the affordances for a future L2 identity. But for Hinako and Takehiro, who represent pattern 3, the same environment did not contributed much to the realisation of a future L2 self. What is highlighted in Figures 8.1–8.6 is the differences in past language learning experiences. In patterns 1 and 2, learners were exposed to English language education at an early stage. Of course, mere ‘exposure’ does not lead to learning. The scope for learning should be more diverse, and the frequency of exposure to the language should be greater and more intensive. This study suggests that the experiential profile of those learners who were able to sustain or form their future L2 self contained more favourable conditions within which to develop their social and cognitive capabilities. In Chapter 7, it was pointed out that learners need to perceive and recognise the possibilities in order to benefit from such opportunities. It is therefore reasonable to speculate that learners with more experience with the language tended to possess higher levels of language awareness. A higher level of language awareness, in turn, made it easier to recognise the potential affordances at their disposal in their language learning environment. The more experience learners have with the language (learning it, using it, or observing how it is used) the better equipped they become in exploiting the possibilities offered. Moreover, the propensity to perceive these opportunities depends on the individual’s identity: an identity as a future English-user enables the learner to perceive affordances more readily. Clearly, the participants represented in patterns 1 and 2 had an advantage in this respect, compared with pattern 3 learners. To summarise, for Sayaka, Maki, Megumi and Yui, the college learning environment provided the affordances necessary for them to realise their future desired selves and their identities. However, although, Hinako and Takehiro were not able to develop their possible L2 future selves, this does, of course, not suggest that they did not have any visions for the future. Takehiro, in particular, did have dreams of his own, but English did not appear to be strongly involved in them. In Chapter 7 we observed that he valued his identity as a musician, a flautist in particular. The significance here is how the contrasting cases of Megumi and Yui and of Hinako and Takehiro, in forming, developing and strengthening visions of their future selves, suggest, again, the importance of contextual resources (immediate family background, etc.).

Learners’ views of themselves as English-users The focal issues for study here were:

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• Learners’ views of themselves as English-users over time and in different contexts. • What affective factors have shaped their outlook? • How do students view their identity within their current institution? • To what extent do they see or sense any conflict between the communities of which they are members? • How do they imagine themselves using English in the future, and what kinds of English do they see themselves using? As the findings related to the third research question overlap in certain respects with those for the first and the second questions, my discussion here is brief. The main theme underlying all three questions is how learners’ language learning trajectories intersect with present learning conditions as they strive towards their future desired selves. We have observed how individual past language learning experiences influence the present, and visions for the future. We have also seen that the present and the future have an impact on the past. Through reframing past experiences, new goals may be set for the future, as pattern 2 demonstrates. Emotions are intricately involved in the way learners perceive their experiences and how these perceptions have an effect on their experiences of self. As noted earlier, the findings of this research suggest that both negative and positive emotions can prompt a learner to act. However, positive emotions lead a learner to be more agentive. Learners with positive experience can be more flexible and strategic in their learning. Struggles and negotiations may guide emerging dispositions and the affective state of the learner, since they promote particular response patterns which express or inform their identities (McCaslin, 2009). Conflicts can be catalytic in developing a self-identity. As Kaplan and Flum argue, ‘students’ engagement in school, their choices, struggles and negotiations are clearly affected by and in turn influence who they think they are, who they think they want to be and who they actually become’ (Kaplan & Flum, 2009: 76). The significance of ‘understanding emotions as states, processes and relationships’ (Pavlenko, 2006: xii) was discussed earlier. The stories of the six participants reflect how the socially mediated nature of emotions emerges through complex interactions among social, individual and contextual processes. By linking identity formation and emotions we are able to bring into focus the long-term developmental process and personal trajectories of learners’ language experience.

Proposing Models of Profiles In the previous section, I synthesised the findings presented in Chapters 5–7. In examining how learners create, strengthen or maintain an additional identity, their Ideal L2 self, the research aimed to explore how

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emotions, and their experiential profiles, are implicated in the process. The findings point to three emerging patterns: (1) learners (Sayaka and Yui) who have already established (more or less) their Ideal L2 self prior to entering college; (2) learners (Megumi and Maki) who developed and formed their Ideal L2 self in their new college environment; (3) learners (Hinako and Takehiro) who were not able to develop a substantial image of their Ideal L2 self prior to entering college nor in their new English-medium learning environment. These three distinctive patterns highlight how past learning experience interacts with the present to activate, generate, reinforce or sustain a future L2-using self. They illuminate how the present learning conditions (the L2 learning experience) serve to alter or create the learners’ future vision of their L2 selves. The participants’ stories reveal that even though they may have similar learning opportunities, how they perceive and recognise these affordances, as well as the capacity to personalise them, depends on their experiential profile and their future visions of themselves. The most interest­ ing aspect of this study is how emotions, conceived as states, processes and relationships (Pavlenko, 2006), were factors in the process. Based on the three distinct patterns, I propose two prototype profiles: A and B.

Profile A Profile A represents the first pattern (Sayaka’s and Maki): where learners already have a clear vision of their Ideal L2 self. Upon entering college, new learning experiences interacted with previous ones to reinforce, enhance and maintain their visions of their L2 selves. Since learners have their own unique learning histories, and their own particular biographical background, the manner in which they perceived their affordances as well as how they personalsed them varied from learner to learner. Both Sayaka and Maki raised their consciousness in learning English. This strengthened the images of their English-using self. Furthermore, the findings showed how emotions factor into the learning process, and also the implications this had for identity formation. The stories of my participants revealed that both positive and negative emotions contributed in enhancing the images of their L2 selves.

Profile B Profile B illustrates the second and third patterns (Megumi, Yui, Hinako and Takehiro), wherein learners do not yet have a clear image of their Ideal L2 self prior to entering their new tertiary learning environment. The key difference between the second and the third pattern is that while learners

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in the former group were able to generate their Ideal L2 selves in response to their new environment, the learners in the latter group could not (or, more precisely, the vision of their L2 self was secondary, and functioned to support a different, more dominant self). What can explain the difference between these two patterns? One factor that emerged was the effect of previous learning experiences on learners’ views and attitudes towards their subsequent learning. While it has been widely established that previous experiences have an influence on present learning (Benson & Nunan, 2005; Kalaja & Barcelos, 2006; Kalaja et al., 2008), there has been relatively little research on specifically how and why they have such an impact. I will delve into this issue by examining patterns 2 and 3 more closely. Megumi and Yui (pattern 2) were apparently helped by the experience of learning English in childhood as a means towards forming their identities as L2 users. The English-medium college environment actually revived their awareness of English as means for communication. Learners’ perception of the target language changes as they have more opportunities to interact with others in the language being learned. This enabled Megumi and Yui to develop more readily a sense of their English-using selves through connecting their learning to the real world. Thus, pattern 2 illustrates how the past interacted with the present to form and authenticate their Ideal L2 selves. It helps to show the changing nature of the possible L2 selves, where ex­ periences are created by the interaction with one’s immediate environment. On the other hand, for pattern 3, the L2 self is minimised, to the extent that the learners are not able to elaborate a clear vision of an Ideal L2 self. The stories of Hinako and Takehiro indicate that using the target language in their new college environment, though meaningful, was not sufficient to impel them to visualise an Ideal L2 self. This leads me to suggest that there may be a ‘threshold’ in a learner’s capacity to generate substantial images of an Ideal L2 self. Learners of foreign languages often, at one time or another, have visions of their successful L2-using selves, but how and why are these images influenced by their previous language learning histories? When, in what manner and to what extent do past learning experiences help in the formation of an Ideal L2 self? For instance, in Takehiro’s case, his perception of English did change for the positive: from English as a school subject to English as means of communication. However, Takehiro had future visions of himself in other areas (as a musician), which hindered the creation of a strong image of an Ideal L2 self. In addition, his limited exposure to the target language in early childhood did not appear to play a major role in supporting or accelerating the creation of an Ideal L2 self, unlike in pattern 2. Hinako’s story provides additional insights. What is of interest is her two years of withdrawal from formal high school. During this time (and also, for that matter, during her early childhood), she was exposed to quite a large amount of written English, primarily through the internet. Once in college, it was quite a challenge for Hinako to get into the ‘swing’ through

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collaborating with others, even where extensive pair or group work was the main pedagogical approach. In fact, as illustrated in Excerpts 7.21 and 7.22, Hinako explained that she was beginning to recognise the merits of group work and could understand the value of cooperation as well. Upon learning English in college, Hinako began to articulate visions of an English-using self. However, since her priority was to develop her identity as a ‘learner’ in a community of learning, namely, her new formal learning environment, visions of an Ideal L2 self were minimised. In addition, with the absence of a language learning history (unlike in pattern 2), Hinako’s exposure to meaningful English, which is crucial in forming clear images of an Ideal L2 self, was limited. However, Hinako’s case exemplifies one aspect of learners’ developmental process of forming future visions of their L2 selves. Given the fluid, changing and ongoing nature of the Ideal L2 self, Hinako and Takehiro might in fact one day work towards forming an image of an Ideal L2 self. Indeed, if we were to follow these two participants for an extended period, there is a strong possibility of the emergence of their Ideal L2 selves. The findings of this research indicate that early English education has a strong influence on subsequent foreign language learning, but this does not imply that only those who have experienced English in childhood are able to form an Ideal L2 self. Nonetheless, English learning in the early years appears to be conducive in setting the stage for the formulation of a future L2 self.

Chapter Summary Through the stories of the six participants we have seen how their changing linguistic affiliation with the target language (that is, their relation­ship to English) influences how they perceive themselves as L2 users and learners, as well as how they see themselves through the eyes of others. In particular, what emerged from their narratives was how what they felt about their experiences affected their learning and their interactions with others. Another important aspect that could be observed from the stories was how their linguistic self-concepts changed and developed. This is to be expected if we consider that identity is not fixed and stable but is situated and dynamic, as borne out by the narratives in this book.

Note (1) Benson (2011) makes a distinction between LLH and what he terms ‘language learning careers’. According to Benson, LLH is ‘the story that is told, whereas language learning careers refers to the storyteller’s underlying conception of the events and processes to which LLH refers’ (Benson, 2011: 548). In my study, LLH encompasses the dimension that Benson terms LLC and refrains from making the distinction between LLH and LLC.

9 Conclusion and Afterword

In this final chapter of the book, the pedagogical implications for future foreign language teaching are first discussed, based on the two models of profile proposed in the previous chapter. This is followed by a discussion of researcher’s reflexivity, which calls for a more transparent approach at all stages of the research process. The chapter then proceeds to outline the limitations of the research, before it concludes with a discussion of the significance this study holds for future works in foreign language learning research.

Implications for Practice The relationship between theory and practice has been a contentious one in identity studies in language learning research. Practice has not always figured prominently in the literature and, especially in the Japanese context, the link between identity and classroom practice has been largely downplayed or underrepresented in the literature on identity.1 This study was conducted in conjunction with my earlier work as a classroom practitioner and, therefore, the pedagogical ramifications are one of my central concerns. To this end, I will demonstrate how the findings of this research highlight the role that the third component of the L2 Motivational System, namely L2 learning experience, plays in both the participants’ language learning ex­ perience and the formation of their emergent identities or, in other words, how prior learning experiences (both positive and negative) interact with the learner’s present educational context. Exploring the L2 learning ex­perience component of the L2 Motivational Self System has huge ramifications for foreign language teaching and learning. Focusing on the present learning environment does not mean that teachers can ignore the past. In fact, since all learners have their own unique learning experiences, which they interpret 166

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in their own distinctive manner, it will be crucial for teachers to understand the learners’ background history as well as their perceptions of their previous learning. This also leads to the understanding that teachers need to observe learners’ development from a long-term point of view. Obviously, there are practical issues to be considered here, but teachers must remind themselves that they are responsible not only for learners’ present learning but also for their future learning. In this section, I address the pedagogical implications that the study may have for the future of English language education in Japan. I will discuss how learners’ Ideal L2 selves can be shaped, authenticated or sustained in the classroom by addressing the teacher’s responsibility to provide opportunities that are conducive to generating or maintaining learners’ possible selves. The spectrum of stories, from ‘Sayaka and Maki’, through ‘Megumi and Yui’ to ‘Hinako and Takehiro’, demonstrates the importance of early exposure to English. The introduction of early English teaching in the Japanese school system (at the elementary level) has been, however, a controversial issue that has generated much heated discussion among government officials, educators and researchers alike (e.g. Otsu, 2004, 2005, 2006; Wada, 2002). Some practitioner-researchers and educators argue that introducing a foreign language in elementary school could reduce learning opportunities for young students’ as yet undeveloped native language (e.g. Saito, 2005). Others compare Japan to other East Asian countries, in particular China and Korea, and lament Japan’s lagging performance in implementing its foreign language policies (e.g. Katsuyama et al., 2008). Finally, others question the curriculuum proposed by the government, and the problem that elementary school teachers have had inadequate training for the introduction of English (Butler, 2007; Fennelly & Luxton, 2011; Kizuka, 2009; Stewart, 2009). Many unresolved issues continue to surround how educational innovation is introduced in foreign language education in Japan. Arguments over its effectiveness are ongoing, particularly with respect to the need for a fixed curriculum, common textbooks and guidelines for teacher training programmes. The lack of concrete directives from MEXT has already resulted in a diversity of programmes, developed by individual district boards of education or schools, which are working under a variety of conceptions (Watanabe, 2006). Such shortcomings in the implementation of early English education as well as the difficulties surrounding the immediate practicalities of pursuing such innovation surely need to be addressed. However, I argue that it is also essential to consider the matter from a broader perspective, by considering the long-term beneficial effects rather than emphasising the immediate effects of a learner’s linguistic achievements. In general, not many studies have explored the effectiveness of early English education (Katsuyama et al., 2008). The few that have examined the matter take a quantitative approach, and compare the differences by administering English tests and questionnaires to groups of learners who have

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and have not experienced early English education. Some of these studies have targeted elementary school students, while others have examined junior and senior high school students to investigate whether early English education was effective and, if so, how. In the former, a distinction was made between elementary students who have English instruction outside of school (private English conversation school, private tutoring, etc.) and those who have not. A quick overview of the literature on early English education informs us that its effectiveness has been examined mainly from three broad perspectives: (1) in terms of linguistic accomplishments (the four skills of listening, reading, speaking and writing, but also grammar and vocabulary) (e.g. Butler & Takeuchi, 2006); (2) with regard to learners’ attitudinal and motivational dispositions towards English and learning English (Hojo & Matsuzaki, 2005; Kanamori, 2006; Mio & Kitsudo, 2004; Shizuka, 2007); (3) with a view to combining (1) and (2) (Katsuyama et al., 2008; Uematsu, 2010). A classic example from the first category comes from the research of Higuchi et al. (1986), who compared the speaking skills of experienced and non-experienced students. The findings illustrated that early exposure to English was beneficial. In 2002, the Chuo Institute for Educational Research administered an English fluency test (included in the test were items such as vocabulary, phonological recognition and conversation comprehension) to approximately 800 students from third to sixth grade. Overall, the experienced learners outperformed their counterparts with respect to their aural skills. Although a longitudinal study in this area is necessary, many of the studies show that, in general, experienced learners outperform their counterparts, especially in terms of their listening and speaking skills. With respect to the second category, that is, how early English language education has an effect on learners’ attitude and motivation, the majority of studies appear to confirm previous findings that, in the long run, positive effects are derived from early English education (Adachi, 2011; Higuchi, 1997; Uematsu, 2010). For example, Katsuyama et al. studied of early English education with primary students. They state: We found that the more students were exposed to English, the more likely they were interested in English learning, to want to study English, and to think English ability is useful. Moreover, the students who had received English lessons at elementary school were more likely to maintain their interest toward English learning and to have stronger motivation after entering junior high school than those who had not. (Katsuyama et al., 2008: 379)

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Uematsu (2010) found that motivation and attitude can be greatly influenced by how English is conceptualised and introduced in the classroom: English as an activity to promote international understanding or English skill instruction activities. That study is particularly relevant to this research. The findings of this research suggest that fostering an international outlook is a necessary component in studying a foreign language in Japan. Learners need to realise that learning English is not only to be able to communicate with native speakers of English (what Karchu refers to as the ‘inner circle’ norm), but also with people in Europe, South America, Asia, the Middle East and Africa. Although the idea that ‘inner circle’ English is the only legitimate English is diminishing in Japan, the stories of my participants confirm that the idea of native-speaker English is still deeply implanted in people’s minds. The ‘inner circle’ norm is viewed as authentic and thus the model to learn. At the same time, my study showed how learners’ perceptions of English could change. This is evident in Megumi’s and Yui’s cases, where their perception of English changed as a result of their experience at an English-medium college. They were able to reconceive their past experience and to reformulate their conceptions of English. On the other hand, Hinako’s and Takehiro’s capacity to reframe their past language learning, and to find potential abilities and uses of English in the future, was minimal. It thus appears that nurturing international understanding from an early age, while using the target language as a medium, can form the basis for learners to envision their future English-using selves. It is often argued that mere exposure to the target language is largely insufficient to develop L2 proficiency: it should also involve meaningful interactions and negotiation of meaning (see e.g. Spade & Lightbrown, 1993; VanPatten, 1993). However, I argue that, in a foreign language context, ‘exposure’ or ‘contact with the target language’ is crucial in forming a ‘foreign language learning mindset’ or in developing a sense of ‘language learning literacy’ in the learners. Megumi’s and Hinako’s stories help to illustrate this point. ‘Naretekita’ (the past tense of ‘get used to’) was a term they constantly used in describing their experiences. Prior to formal language learning, and in the early stages of their learning process, learners need ample opportunities to ‘get used to’ (nareru) the language. As exemplified in the Japanese metaphor concerning the Japanese learning culture (see Chapter 6), learning involves imitating a model. Characterised as nareru (get used to), learning occurs as learners practise to become closer to the model. Hinako claimed that by becoming ‘used to’ (naretekita) English, she felt less tension or apprehension (kyoufushin) about learning or using English. As Megumi’s and Hinako’s cases illustrate, Eigo (English) needs to become futsuu (usual; a common feature) for any learning to occur. Japanese learners of English need to develop a ‘capacity’ to visualise their English-using self and also to be able to ‘personalise’ or utilise the affordances offered to them. Unless they are able to say they have become naretekita, and have been able to remove the kyofushin

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(apprehension) that will enable them to regard Eigo as futsuu, capitalising on, or personalising their past experiences in terms of their future selves will become a difficult task for them. Nurturing awareness of language and communication will, thus, encourage the effective use of language learning opportunities, which would, in turn, enable them to become more skilled and competent language learners and users. The findings of this study suggest that learners with limited contact with English (e.g. Hinako and Takehiro) could not respond as adaptively and proactively as their counterparts. It is evident that early exposure to the target language is significant in laying the foundations for future language learning and language use, particularly in the context of learning foreign languages. Of course, early English education depends on the frequency and quality of contact,2 whereby quality of contact implies the extent to which learners engage in meaningful inter­ actions with the target language. Having discussed how early English education contributes to shaping an Ideal L2 self, I will now turn to discuss how the concept of possible selves (future-projected identities that can generate goal-oriented behaviours) can be translated into practice and used in the classroom. The prerequisite of a future self is the existence of an Ideal L2 possible self, but individuals differ in how and whether they are able to generate a successful vision of their L2 possible self. Moreover, the creation of ideal possible selves does not occur in a vacuum, but depends on an array of tentative possible selves students may envision. As Dörnyei states, possible selves emerge through the ‘realistic process of awareness raising and guided selection from the multiple aspirations, dreams, desires, etc. that students have already entertained in the past’ (Dörnyei, 2009: 33). This involves a coconstruction of past selves within the present learning experience. In other words, their sense of self is shaped by learners’ social interactions in the present as their learning environment (largely, the classroom) can be a place for learners to share and co-construct their past experiences and identities in terms of their aspirations for the future. In fact, in the formation of their ideal future selves, learners use peers, teachers and even people they see on television, in movies and magazines, and also online, as role-models to form their ideal selves (Markus & Nurius, 1986). In fact, several studies have promoted the use of pop culture in language learning (Fukuda, 2008; Murray, 2008b, 2011; Sade, 2011) and have demonstrated how the use of pop culture can inform practice. Role-models have the potential to enhance learners’ visions of possible selves and the communities that they may one day be able to take part in through imagin­ ation, engagement and alignment (Wenger, 1998). For instance, a female participant, a video gamer, in Chick and Breidbach’s (2011) study, had an active sense of engagement through her imagination in the fictional world created by the video games, and it is through alignment that she experienced the sense of belonging to the community of video gamers. Murray (2011)

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discusses how the use of pop culture fuelled learners’ imaginations, which in turn mediated learners’ visions of L2 possible selves. The focus of discussion here is how metacognitive knowledge and skills played a central role in the participants’ efforts to align themselves with their imagined communities. In the narratives of the participants in this study, Megumi pointed out how watching foreign movies not only encouraged her to learn English, but also provided her with the incentive to continue learning the language. In a foreign language context, this is particularly pertinent, since learners are provided with few opportunities to generate or ‘authenticate’ their possible selves through actual contact, whether inside or outside the classroom. My research revealed another source of learners’ images of their Ideal L2 selves: role-models. In some of the language learning histories of the participants, their desire to learn English had been inspired by their Japanese English teachers. To the learners, these teachers projected the image of an ‘international person’ (Yashima, 2009): that is, people who can function in international communities in English. Furthermore, Maki indicated that the returnees were powerful role-models for her. She stated that ‘a nativespeaker is too remote a goal, whereas returnees are easy to identify with; that is, compared to the native speakers’ (from Maki’s transcript). The significant point here is how Near Peer Modelling can facilitate not only the emergence but also the realisation of a possible future L2 self. How can these findings be translated into classroom practice? First, teachers could use music, movies and television programmes to vgenerate and support learners’ visions of their future English selves. Fukuda et al. experimented with activities that could elicit possible selves by ‘examining the interrelationship between the motivations of past-projected and future-projected identities, and effort in learning within social networks inside and outside of the classroom’ (Fukuda et al., 2011: 1). Furthermore, Hatfield and Dörnyei (2013) used an abundant array of practical ideas to facilitate the creation and maintenance of future visions of the Ideal L2 self. The main goal was to help ‘students to discursively interact and stimulate each other’s imagination, partially through the nature of our activities and through creating an interactive environment which invites them to position themselves more agentively’ (Fukuda et al., 2011: 5). The study provides insights to the formation of (and maintenance of) L2 possible selves through collaborative learning, an area that requires more examination in the context of my research.

Some Final Thoughts on Narrative Studies My final thoughts concern narrative enquiry as a methodology. I first discuss the inherent transformative nature of narratives, which enabled me to examine my research questions in a manner no other approaches could

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have allowed me. I then present the methodological issues that emerged in the process of the research. As a researcher using a fully fledged narrative approach for the first time, I was excited by its potential to illuminate the complexity of the learning experience, but, at the same time, it also presented many challenges, which confirmed the difficulties of adopting a narrative approach. However, there is no doubt that it was the complexity of the approach that also strengthened my commitment to it.

The power of narrative studies A narrative approach has been a useful and productive methodology in pursuing my research enquiries. The principal aim was to investigate the language learning experiences of Japanese students in higher education. A narrative approach enabled me to explore the subject in the greatest possible depth and to tease out the complexities of the relationship between identity construction and how emotions factor into the process. Framing narratives as fundamentally stories of an individual’s experience(s) (e.g. Bruner, 1990; Clandinin & Connelly, 2000; Riessman, 2008; Ricouer, 1984, 1991; Squire, 2008), I understood narratives, firstly, as a vehicle that allows us to understand the impact of our experiences. Narratives are means through which individuals define and recreate themselves in a certain discourse. Thus, the main corollary that stems from this experience-centred approach is that narratives are the means of sense-making (Ochs & Capps, 2001: 35). That is, in the process of constructing narratives, narrators make sense of their lived experience by attempting to understand it by making connections, giving coherence and, sometimes, by making efforts to unravel the complexity of their experiences. It is through the telling and the retelling of their stories that individuals continuously engage in interpreting and reinterpreting their experiences. What is of significance in narrative-based enquiry is the acknowledgement that interpretations are in constant flux and can shift over time. Our interpretations of events and actions can be influenced not only by our past experiences or present state, but also by the anticipation of the future, so that as events unfold our interpretation of experience will change as well (Bell, 2011; Mishler, 2006).3 Concomitantly, new experiences may require us to reinterpret past experiences such that we end up understanding our experiences very differently. Drawing connections among experiences and recognising how past, present and future experiences can fashion the ways in which individuals interpret their new life circumstances suggest that narratives are not just a production of individuals and their interactions with the social milieu (Riessman, 1993, 2008). The recognition of temporality and the constant reinterpretation of events and actions is one of the greatest strengths in narrative enquiry (Bell, 2011). Secondly, I regard narratives in language learning research as an effective tool that can uncover stories of learners’ language learning experience that

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are otherwise not accessible and would not otherwise be understood as providing opportunities for the emergence of deeply hidden emotions and assumptions. That is, narratives are helpful in tapping into knowledge that even the narrators themselves may not be aware of. In construction of their narratives, narrators tell and retell, interpret and reinterpret their stories, in an attempt to make sense of their experiences (meaning-making accompanies re-storying). The idea of the emergence of new knowledge is rooted in the Deweyan theory of experience, where reality is relational, unfixed, temporal, continuous and constantly changing (Dewey, 1938). Through a process known as the reflective cycle, experience becomes educative and, as a result, the change or growth brought about culminates in the formation of new knowledge. However, we also need to acknowledge that new knowledge is not the result of an individual activity of the narrator. It is co-constructed with the researcher, since the latter uses her or his own life to interpret participants’ lives. The researcher does not passively listen to the participants’ stories, but is actively involved in constructing them as well (which suggests that, inherently, these practices come with ethical responsibilities). Karlson calls this process double narrative, by presenting the concept of resonance (Conle, 1993) (see also Chapter 3): When one story causes us to make metaphorical links with another, i.e. through resonance, we respond to the memories and stories of others with memories of our own, and together these stories will open up possibilities for our future. This is how narrative will help teachers/ counselors and learners to meet. Resonance is also the process that carries the inquiry along by producing yet further stories. (Karlson, 2008: 85) Thus, as noted a number of times in previous chapters, I regard my involvement as the researcher to be a significant factor in the construction of my participants’ stories. This suggests that stories might differ slightly, depending on with whom they shared their narratives. Generally, participants narrate whatever they deem appropriate at the time. The result is, of course, only one version of their stories. At the same time, my construction of their stories is also selective, since I have taken from the narratives the material I consider pertinent to my research enquiries. The understanding that narrative is a co-construction or the meaningmaking activity that accompanies the retelling of the story is further elaborated by Barkhuizen (2011). His idea of narrative knowledging he explains as follows: the meaning making, learning, or knowledge construction that takes place during the narrative research activities of (co)constructing narratives, analyzing narratives, reporting the findings, and reading/ watching/listening to research reports. (Barkhuizen, 2011: 395)

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Barkhuizen recognises that the knowledge created in the process of telling/ retelling and interpretation/reinterpretation of the narrator’s story is not stable or unchallengeable. In fact, meaning-making is active and fluid (Barkhuizen, 2011). That is, the understanding of the narrator’s experience may be interpreted differently each time the story is told or reflected or revisited (Nelson, 2011). The strength of narratives lies in their dynamic and ever-changing nature. A sense of development and transformation is always inherent in narratives. This brings me to the third point: the transformative nature of narratives. The narratives of my participants in this study functioned as vehicles to probe into their language learning experiences, and their stories were helpful in documenting the changes in their language learning progress. Through narrative enquiry, learners attempt to make sense of their experiences as well as to make changes in their learning. Some showed agency in searching for alternatives to transform what they saw as poor learning in the past, and sought different ways for themselves in the present and future. The transformative nature of narratives functioned as a meditational tool (Johnson & Golombek, 2011) to document how narrative could provide opportunities to understand the language learning process and its inherent correlation with identity formation. The stories of the participants in this study illustrate what this change looked like and how engagement in narrative activities (e.g. telling/retelling; interpretation/reinterpretation; co-construction of knowledge between the narrators and the researcher) contributed in fostering their language learning process. In Sayaka’s case, for instance, through the telling of her learning experiences she was able to reframe her identity from an incompetent international student to an active learner and user of English. With the mediation of narratives, individuals are able to reflect on their past to alter the past, and also to alter the past in terms of their present.

A way forward in narrative studies: Reflexivity In the literature, issues such as ‘objectivity’, the researcher’s role and a lack of methodological rigour are often mentioned as weaknesses in narrative enquiry or, more broadly speaking, qualitative studies in general. However, these features, I believe, are, in fact, the very strengths or merits of narrative enquiry. In what follows, I attempt to examine these three particularly salient aspects in more detail.

Objectivity, reliability, replicability Following many notable academics in the field (see e.g. Barkhuizen et al., 2014), I also regard narrative enquiry to be inherently ‘interpretative’ in nature. The findings are never ‘objective’ but are ‘subjective’. By this I mean that it is not ‘objective’ in the sense that is usually used in quantitative

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research, where findings are supported by statistical evidence and conventional research procedures are employed to assess objective reality. In fact, whether quantitative or qualitative, I believe that no research can ever be ‘objective’. As Allen (2005) argues in Frost (2011), it is not possible for researchers to ‘turn off ’ themselves and ignore their beliefs and perceptions entirely. It is not a realistic option for researchers to adopt a tabula rasa orientation to research, for, surely, researchers do not conduct unplanned and unstructured research, but rather come to a research project with extensive background knowledge of the topic, sufficient to formulate our research questions. Although quantitative researchers have worked towards standardising research procedures to ensure generalisability, and although ‘numbers’ may provide a set of findings or responses in their quest for objective reality, how a researcher interprets these numbers depends on the individual researcher, who will have their own unique, multiple conceptual frameworks or what Frost would call an overall worldview: ‘an individual perspective defined by not only values or perceptions, but also by the sum of one’s experiences, beliefs, and knowledge from every facet of life’ (Frost, 2011: 5). The subject of objectivity brings us to another heated concern for critics of narrative studies, which is the issue of ‘reliability’. However, as Benson convincingly argues, in narrative research, reliability appears to have little relevance: The notion of ‘reliability’ makes little sense in narrative inquiry, because of the multiple levels at which individuality and uniqueness are at issue: in participants’ experiences, their stories, the telling of their stories, and their interpretations and retelling of their stories in the context of [their unique setting]. (Benson, 2014: 88) Replicability, which is crucial to quantitative research, is another aspect that has little relevance to narrative studies. What emerges from the stories of the participants is the product of the unique interpretation of the researchers’ subjectivity and, thus, it would be impossible for another researcher to interpret the same data and come up with an identical set of findings. Furthermore, for the very same reason, it is not possible to general­ ise research findings from narrative studies. Generalisation from narratives is ‘often a matter of establishing a pattern of shared experience’ (Barkhuizen et al., 2014: 92), where ‘thought moves from case to case instead of from case to generalization’ (Polkinghorne, 1995: 11). In this context, how and to what extent researchers are able to make explicit their ontological and epistemological stance becomes a crucial factor to consider for involved those in narrative studies. It is not surprising to see that in many cases the researcher is not made transparent enough in the research. The reasons may often be of a practical nature: for instance,

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researchers may be limited in time and space, and assume that their theoretical positioning is implied in the description of the research being undertaken. But it is crucial for researchers to state their positions very clearly from the outset and, most importantly, to be careful to show how their theoretical understanding is translated into each stage of the research process. I hope that, by now, readers have understood that I resonate with the ideological underpinning that recognises that there are multiple realities (Creswell, 2013; Crotty, 2005; Frost, 2011), and regard knowledge and meaning to be ‘socially constructed by individuals in interaction with their world’ (Merriam et al., 2002: 3). The most pertinent concern for me was to ask myself how and to what extent I was successful in reflecting my philosophical assumptions throughout the entire research process.

The role of the researcher If narrative studies are fundamentally interpretative and subjective, the role of the researcher and the participant as well as the relationship between the two parties become all the more relevant. There is no shortage in recent literature on narrative studies that provides an elaborate description of its merits, but many tend to focus on this issue at the stage of collecting data, namely, interviews (or talks). The narrative researcher usually pays careful attention in recruiting, setting up the talks and managing the talks themselves, but there is less focus on the role of the researchers and their relationship with their participants in the process of analysis and presentation. For instance, as discussed earlier, in the process of recruiting my participants, I realise that I have taken advantage of my background as a graduate of the research setting, and have attempted to create a rapport between myself and my prospective participants in order to recruit as many participants as possible. The issue at stake in this example is my identity (and, perhaps, although unintentionally, I acknowledge that certain power relationship may have developed). My position as such has an important implication not only in what transpires and is generated in the talks, but also in how it feeds into the analysis and presentation. Since interviews are not treated as a technical matter, but rather as a situated social accomplishment in narrative research, an examination of the ways in which the researcher’s involvement influences and informs the research at all stages of the research process is an important methodological consideration, and requires a considerable amount of reflexivity on the part of the researcher. The term ‘reflexivity’ appears frequently in narrative studies and in qualitative research in general. A quick survey of the literature tells us that it is easier to respond to the question ‘What is reflexivity?’ than it is to try to answer questions such as ‘How is reflexivity managed in narrative enquiries’? ‘Reflexivity’ is easier said than done. Usually, researchers present their personal thoughts about their study, reflect on the methodological process or their research findings, and/or provide suggestions for the future

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towards the end of their report. However, I find it more meaningful and relevant to incorporate reflection at each stage of the research process. An example in Chapter 4 illuminates my own discursive interaction on how I have contributed to the co-construction of my participants’ language learner’ identities through our talks, and my attempts to reflect on my role have been presented at each phrase and stage of the analysis. Revealing the researcher’s background inevitably becomes crucial in this research context. It is somewhat surprising that not many researchers make transparent their journeys as learners, teachers or researchers. Rarely do we find information about them in their writings, yet we are expected to read, contemplate and discuss their research. I have provided at the beginning of this book a brief overview of my trajectory as a learner, a practitioner and a researcher. Also, interspersed and interwoven into the chapters, the readers can find some personal information on myself. In conjunction with the above, and in an attempt to illustrate how both my professional and my personal profile would have affected the research, I would like to comment on the more relevant methodological issues of this study: namely, issues concerning translation and transcription, and the implications they have for data representation.

The translating and transcribing of participants’ stories Broadly speaking, translation issues in social research can be classified in two ways: first, according to the epistemological position of the researcher; and second, according to the conditions pertaining to specific languages. First, if researchers see themselves or the translators as objective tools of research, then the elimination of bias emerges as one of the main issues. The questions would be discussed in terms of validity – focusing on ‘correct’ interpretations, register, ethics and so on (Edwards, 1998; Harrington & Turner, 2001). Here, the central concern would be in terms of obtaining the ‘correct’ transfer of meaning. The alternative view regards transcription and translation as part of the process of knowledge production (Hamersley, 1995; Stanley & Wise, 1993). This understanding is more in line with the approach in the present research. Proficiency in both languages enabled me to function in the community I worked with. The researcher/translator role provided opportunities for close attention to cross-cultural meanings and interpretations, which proved to be extremely helpful in data collection and analysis. However, the dual translator/researcher role does not come problem-free. If researchers regard themselves as active in the research process, there naturally arises a responsibility for the way they represent others and their languages. Even if the researcher speaks the same language and comes from the same ethnic group as the research participants, this would not guarantee that the final text is closer to the ‘truth’, since researchers are situated in a particular relationship with the language. Although translation issues in research tend

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to focus on the debate about the ‘correct’ transfer of meaning, I believe that more discussion should centre on the epistemological and methodological issues that surround translation in cross-language research. In terms of how language-specific conditions may influence the transcription and representation of the data, the following are four areas of the Japanese language to which I paid particular attention in the analysis stage (details in Chapter 4): styles (honorifics, gender, youth language), phrases (propositional and non-propositional information), sentences (subject–object–verb order, prominence of topic–comment relation) and communication strategies (listener’s responses, rhetorical structures, silence, etc.) (Maynard, 1997, 2005). These features were taken into consideration in the translation stage, which was cross-checked with a bilingual colleague. My bilingual/bicultural background thus played a pivotal role in this research. As I carried out this study, I learned that one can draw on one’s experiences to discover and create meanings, but we need to be careful in how and to what extent researchers are able to maintain a more critical and reflective dimension to their research.

Methodological rigor The third and final area that merits some discussion is the often debated topic concerning methodological rigor in narrative studies. As described in Chapters 3 and 4, narrative research varies considerably in its approach (the ways of doing, writing and presenting the study). For one, narrative analysis and the analysis of narratives represent different ways in conducting narrative studies. However, aligning with Barkhuizen et al., I concur with the understanding that: we are not looking for ‘objective’ or ‘reliable’ findings, but for a wellcrafted subjective interpretation of data, whether it comes in the form of paradigmatic argument based on thematic or discourse analysis or in the form of narrative written by the researcher. (Barkhuizen et al., 2014: 89) The implication is that because researchers base their decisions their own knowledge and experiences, it becomes all the more important to make explicit or transparent their decision-making process. This requires re­searchers to take on board a more critical and reflective approach to their studies. In conjunction to methodological rigour, one of the pressing issues in narrative research is to open up the field to accept the diversity of approaches – the different styles of writing and representing research findings (Barkhuizen et al., 2014; Nelson, 2011). We try to frame narrative analysis in the conventional way – literature review, method, findings, discussion and conclusion – because then the work is more readily accepted by many academics and publishers; but, obviously, this is potentially problematic in

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narrative studies. For one, as I have mentioned in earlier chapters, it is quite difficult to discern when analysis begins in narrative research. Also, as we have seen, narrative writing itself is considered part of the method of data analysis. It is true that I have followed the more conventional pattern in representing my findings, but my understanding is that we need to be ‘systematic’ in the sense that we need to set ‘guidelines’ for readers as well as ourselves, or we are liable to be lost in the sea of data. The most important aspects in this context are, firstly, the reflexive position of the researcher and, secondly, transparency, or what Mann (2011) calls the ‘parameters of sensitivity’ in the process of research. In light of the varying types of narrative approaches, the field of applied linguistics should be more creative and flexible, and recognise and embrace multiple forms and styles.

Limitations to the Research As with all research, I recognise that there are several limitations to the research. One of the main concerns is the focus on the characteristics of a particular group of Japanese college students, taken at a certain point of time, under certain circumstances. My participants are not a typical ‘population’ of Japanese college students, and I do not intend to make general arguments for all Japanese English-learners in higher education in Japan. I acknowledge a possible limitation, or rather a future direction which this research could take in order to contribute further to the understanding of the notions of possible selves in language learning. The concept of possible selves presumes the presence of a future-oriented self. It follows, then, that this vision calls for a longitudinal and context-bound perspective in the research on learners’ identities, since the future plays a prominent role in the identity construction of the individual. How the future visions that learners hold for themselves develop, transform or are abandoned, as well as how that process affects their identity construction, is an area that merits further longitudinal investigation. To date, Lamb’s study (2012) of six Indonesian students studying English at the secondary and tertiary level is the only piece of research that has explored the matter from a longitudinal perspective. Lamb’s retrospective study covers a time span of six years; however, I suggest the need for studies over a greater period of time. This could provide much insight into the relationship between the possible selves theory and foreign language learning. In addition, it would be illuminating to compare Lamb’s findings with the findings on the Japanese students in order to advance discussions on the L2 possible self. Finally, the findings of this research exemplify a need for further studies into learners’ interactions with various social agents, not only within educational contexts (e.g. teachers and peers, but also more intangible agents,

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including educational policies and practices, the curriculum, and more or fewer teaching/learning materials), but also within contexts outside of the classroom, such as the family. This study has raised some new questions concerning the influence parents and family may have on foreign language learning. Parental involvement in learners’ development is clearly becoming a research priority (Sandefur et al., 2005). As the number of students learning English at a younger age increases, so do their learning contexts. As evident from the stories of my participants’ language learning experiences, the role of language learning institutions in the private sector, such as conversational schools and the ‘home tutoring system’, is a new potential research area. A comprehensive study in this hugely underexplored area could contribute to further discussion on the subject of early English education and its impact on learning English in Japan.

Afterword Research projects concerned with the issue of language learning and the poststructuralist understanding of identity tend to make a distinction between psychological and social variables. It is my hope that this study has shown how psychological factors, such as emotions and the experience of learning, are intimately entwined with the social dimensions in the formation of identity. This research sought to unify these two broad perspectives on identity by taking a narrative approach, and then analysing the data by drawing on Lave and Wenger’s theory of learning, Andersen’s notion of imagined communities and Dörnyei’s concept of the L2 self. Some may criticise my research by claiming that there are limitations associated with ‘borrowing’ in this way from existing literature, but I think it merely exemplifies the complexity of the issue. I propose that we should, instead, see the ‘borrowing’ as an example that celebrates the diversity of theoretical perspectives that can inform our understanding of the subject. In short, this study presents a multidisciplinary approach to research by incorporating a multiplicity of theories. While I am not able to provide readers with conclusive statements, I am certain that this research does offer much food for thought with respect to the study of emotions in language learning, and how they interact with the learners’ identity and language learning in general. I also hope that it has offered issues for further contemplation in terms of its methodological approach.

Notes (1) On a worldwide scale, there are some exceptions. For instance, Cummins (2001, 2006) claims that both cognitive engagement and identity investment of the student are necessary for optimal academic development. He argues that ‘the construct of identity investment is an important tool for planning, curriculum, and instruction in

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multilingual schools’ (Cummins, 2006: 67; original emphasis). Another example is Ushioda’s (2011) work on motivation and identity. She calls on teachers to engage with their students as ‘people’ rather than ‘language learners’ by engaging students’ transportable identities within the classroom. (2) Takada’s statistical study (2003) found that when, where and how often students were exposed to English was crucial. In her study, there were no significant differences between the group that studied once or twice a month and the non-experienced students. (3) In fact, for Dewey, ‘future’ was a crucial concept. Dewey emphasised that we human beings live in a world that is not static. For instance, democracy has brought into the world a notion of freedom but, simultaneously, it has also has created problems for people’s future, since democracy as a social activity is no longer founded on fixed, collective traditions, but requires constant critical reflection. The main task is to therefore to focus not on the past but on the future. The past, for Dewey, has value only if it offers validity to our future decisions (Dewey, 2004).

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Index

Community of Practice (CoP) 19 , 20, 99 Course of Study 6, 85 Cresswell 35, 40, 41, 52, 176

ACL (antecedent condition of the learner) 149, 161 affect (affective dimension) 1, 2, 4, 10, 18, 22, 30, 34, 38, 44, 45, 67, 84, 93, 100, 141, 142, 148, 149, 158, 162 affordances (theory of) ix, 5, 128, 139, 142, 144, 145, 152, 161, 163, 169 akogare 9, 10, 12, 78, 88, 96, 100, 112, 124, 126, 151, 153 ALT (Assistant Language Teacher) 129 Anderson 14, 21, 80, 147 Atkinson 35, 36, 47, 61 situated qualitative study 35

Denzin and Lincoln 34 Dewey 13, 14, 40, 41, 81, 149, 173, 181 concept of experience 13, 15, 17, 19, 40, 180 concept of learning 17, 19, 26 continuity and interaction 16, 40 discursive space v, 22, 23, 24, 25, 29, 30, 33, 150 Dorneyi 14, 18, 21–29, 66, 67, 72, 76, 80, 87, 96, 104, 106, 112, 122, 139, 144, 150, 158, 170, 171, 180, 181 the ideal L2 self v, 22, 23, 26, 27, 29, 30–32, 76, 77, 93–95, 101–105, 112, 122, 124–128, 131, 134, 139, 144, 147, 148, 150, 151, 153–157, 160, 162–165, 170, 171 L2 Motivational Self System 22, 23, 24, 30, 105, 108, 117, 145, 150, 166 the L2 learning experience 22, 25, 26, 105, 117, 124, 145, 150, 163, 166 ought-to self 23, 110, 126, 131, 134, 153

Barkhuizen 47, 49, 66, 67, 72, 173, 174 Barkhuizen et al. xii, 37, 67, 69, 70, 175, 178 Barton and Trusting 20 Block vii, xii, 13, 14, 15, 25, 36, 37, 47, 48, 49, 65, 71, 77, 88, 95 Bourdieu 90 Bruner 36, 38, 39, 42, 172, 173 Clandinin Clandinin and Connelly 16, 38, 39, 40, 44, 49, 81, 172 temporality, interaction, situation 40, 41, 42 CLT (communicative language teaching) 6, 7, 8

EAP (English for academic purposes) 3 Egbert and Sanden xi, 3, 67 198

Index 199

ELP (English Language Program) 51–56, 60 Study English Abroad Program (SEA Program) 57, 59, 60 emotions 44–46, 80, 81 English as an international language (EIL) 10 English as a lingua franca (ELF) 10 English-using self (user) 32, 90, 122, 141, 154, 158, 159 experiential profile 22, 26, 30, 142, 161, 163 Gibson 142, 144 , 145, 161 Giddens 14 global English 10 globalisation 12 Greene 29 Hiraga 116 Ideal L2 self identity construction ix, 1, 3, 11, 35, 36, 37, 42, 80, 147, 148, 172, 179 notion of identity 14, 32 see also Dorynei, L2 Motivational Self System identification and participation 18 imagined communities 14, 17, 18, 21, 22, 29–31, 80, 95, 101, 114, 131, 134, 147, 171, 180 inner-circle norm 9, 10, 24 international posture 14, 29–32, 80 Jenkins 10, 30 Kalaja, Mendes, Barcelos 38, 66, 67, 164 Kanno xii, 1, 12, 14, 20, 21, 33, 37, 43, 44, 48, 88, 89, 95 Kanno and Norton 18, 21, 37, 43, 80, 92, 97 kikokushijo xii, 1, 52, 87, 88 knowledge-telling, knowledgetransforming 138 Kramsch 20, 21, 44, 45, 80 L2 learning experience 22, 25, 26, 63, 166

L2 self 14, 22, 23, 26, 27, 30, 81, 105, 124, 141, 144 see also possible self Lamb 23, 31, 81, 179 language education in Japan 5, 167–169 language learning (experiences) 3, 22, 29, 30, 33, 34, 38, 57, 62, 63, 73, 74, 76, 80, 81, 86, 90, 100, 102, 103, 105, 112, 117, 126–128, 130, 139, 142, 145, 146, 148–151, 153–158, 162, 166, 172 language-learning histories (LLH) 148, 149 Lantolf 1, 3, 13, 18, 19, 21, 37 Lave and Wenger 18–20, 80, 147, 180 Maher 5 , 9, 11, 12 meaning-making process 13, 39, 71, 78, 173, 174 Miyahara 7, 8, 9, 61 Murphey 7, 21, 27, 32, 94, 112, 131 nareru/naretekita (get used to ) 82, 92, 108, 114–117, 119, 135, 144, 169 narrative ix, 13, 36 analytical model 72–77 analysing narrative data 66, 67 dialogic/performative approach 71 interactional performative model 70 narrative approach 37, 39 narrative interviews 47, 60, 61 stories of experience 36, 38, 39, 172 Near Peer Modelling 27, 94, 95, 112, 171 Norton 13, 14, 18–21, 29, 33, 37, 38, 44, 47, 80, 87, 97, 98, 114, 143, 147 ‘parameters of sensitivity’ (Mann) 47, 49, 179 Pavlenko 3, 13, 21, 37, 38, 40, 45, 46, 69, 76, 80, 162, 163 Period of Integrated Studies 11 Piller 12, 36, 44 pop culture 114, 171 possible self 14, 22, 26–28, 32, 77, 80, 81, 87, 96, 99, 101, 112, 114, 124, 125, 127, 128, 139, 143, 153, 156, 158, 159

200 Index

poststructuralist ix, 1, 11, 13–15, 17, 32, 147, 180 reflectivity 77, 174 Reform Act 6, 7 Ricoeur 38, 42 Riessman 38, 40, 61, 65, 69, 70, 71, 77, 172 situated learning 1, 18–20, 80, 147 social constructivist 13, 17, 32, 147 Super English High School 7

thematic analysis 68, 69, 70 Ushioda viii, 22, 23, 24, 27, 29, 114, 119, 120, 158, 159, 181 Vygotsky 18 Wenger 1, 3, 13, 18–21, 33, 80, 105, 106, 147, 149, 170, 171, 180 Yashima 14, 29, 31, 32, 80, 90, 158, 171